No Judgment Zone: Exploring Pleasure and Healing - Butt Play Doesn't Make You Gay

Episode Date: July 11, 2025

In this unapologetically honest episode of the No Judgment Zone, we’re diving deep into one of the most misunderstood topics in the bedroom: anal pleasure for straight men. From light touch to full-on pegging, we unpack the anatomy, the stigma, and the shame society places on straight men exploring what feels good to them.It’s time to separate sensation from sexuality. Just because he likes it back there doesn’t mean he’s gay—and if that idea makes you uncomfortable, this episode is especially for you.We talk about the prostate, toxic masculinity, the role women play in either shaming or supporting their partners, and how healing and intimacy start with curiosity—not judgment.Ready to expand your perspective on pleasure? Press play, tap in, and get free.💋 Follow @nojudgmentzonepod on Instagram, subscribe on your favorite platform, and drop a Whisper if you’ve got thoughts, questions, or stories to share.

Welcome to the No Judgment Zone podcast with your favorite sensual nurse. You already know this is a space where pleasure and healing meet with honesty, curiosity, and zero shame. And baby, today's episode, we're diving into a topic that stirs up a whole lot of opinion. fear and stigma and no pleasure for straight men yes you heard me right let's talk about why but play doesn't make you gay so grab your drink send the link to a friend roll a little something something get comfortable and let's go there with love with honesty and with no judgment. So first of all in this topic, as a nurse, you know,

the little scientific tidbits are going to come out here and there. I think it's important to understand that the anatomy of a man, the prostate, is a major pleasure center for people with penises. It is sometimes known as the male G. spot. I don't know if you've ever seen like the memes on social media where it's like God obviously has a sense of humor because a guy's G spot is in his ass. But when you think about that, look at how much information and tips and tools there are to find the female G spot simply because it's going to give her an amazing orgasm, right? She's going to remember you forever

and ever and ever and ever. Why would you not want to do the same for your man? Or men, why would you not want to feel the same? This podcast does not discriminate, okay? Yes, I'm a girl's girls, but I'm also honest. It's going to be some times when I get in the females' ass too, okay? But no, seriously, stimulation isn't

just about orientation. It's about sensation. The whole premise of this podcast is experiencing pleasure. And biology, don't lie, the body responds to what feels good, not just what fits societal norms. There are some men when they get older, they have to go for their annual checkup to check for prostate cancer, and it's a very awkward experience for them, mostly because of the stigma, around it, but it don't feel as bad as they probably thought it would. And honestly, when you think about it, simply because it's the butt, that's where people think that anal pleasure is the same as homosexuality. And it's not. That would just, that would be like saying a female getting fingered means that she's gay. Well, it depends on who the

fingers belong to. And that's the same way with a man when it comes to. Ain't no pleasure. Who is pleasing his behind? Who is he attracted to? That is your preference. This is your pleasure. There's a difference. But in this very toxic masculinity world where the patriarchy and a man's man has to be doing this and look like this and present like this, you have these certain structures that doesn't allow for men to just be themselves. It doesn't allow for men to explore, express, and feel pleasure. If you think about what you have been heard, it means to be a man. It's almost robotic.

You provide for your family. You sacrifice for your family. You don't show emotions. You get up and you go and you go and you go and you go. And your pleasure comes from seeing everybody else, please. But what about you? You're important too. And I'm specifically talking to the men.

A good man is priceless. A real man is priceless. So I am an advocate, and I will say that straight man can enjoy anal play and still be 100% heterosexual. sexual. Pleasure is not the same as preference. But what that means is for the man who is only sexually attracted to women, but he may be curious. That puts accountability in the lap of the female because either your woman can add shame to your curiosity or she can become a safe place for you. You know, you know how sometimes when you're talking to somebody and you're getting to know them and you're trying to figure out, you know, what's their boundary, but you don't want to quite say

how you feel because you don't want to look crazy just in case they don't feel the same. So if you kind of throw the idea out there, guys, be like, yo, my dog was talking to me the other day and he said his girl did X, Y, Z knowing good and damn well, that's what you want your girl to do to you. But you're just trying to fill her out. And you may have the women who be like, what? You better keep your eye on that friend. Or you may have the woman be like, I bet he had a hell of a time. Have you ever tried that before? Which response would you rather have? Which one makes you feel safe, makes you feel seen and accepted? Ladies, as much, as you want your man to put forth effort to learn your body and to please you,

you absolutely have to do the same thing. I love a good play session where you got time. You're not rushing, right? and you're not doing the expected positions. You really kind of just create the atmosphere with the candles and the dim lighting. Or maybe it's just a cozy day, like a rainy day at home, right? And you're just playing around and like, hey, you want to try this? Or, hey, I've been thinking, let's do this today.

playing and exploring is literally like one of my favorite things to do it's just the vulnerability of the moment the intimacy of the moment the way that you were just fully opening up unintended for each other and just having fun and connecting and learning and then you realize realize, okay, he likes this. Okay. He shook when I did this. And you're paying attention and you are being intentional

when you change the grip of your hand or the direction that you're stroking. Or you lick a spot that you normally don't lick. And you're watching his reactions. y'all know i'll be having visuals and flashbacks while i be talking out but no seriously like when it comes to loving your man who loves you what does that look like like what are your boundaries because as much as women especially nowadays in 2025 we want an emotionally available man someone who is in tune with his emotions you know is vulnerable okay when he presents

that to you how are you going to handle it and you can't be rude or act like a homie and be like bro you bugging because think about if you were bringing something sensitive to him how would you want him to handle your feelings how would you want him to treat you don't want to be made fun of you want to be heard you definitely don't want any judgment or shame and you even if he may not agree or may not fully understand, you would much rather he respond with questions and curiosity and love. And I am here to tell you if nobody else has told you, baby, men are emotional.

They may express it differently. They may show it differently. But men are extremely emotional and they are just as delicate as females. If your man ever brings up the topic of anal play, I beg you. First of all, recognize that as an honor, that he trusts you enough to be that vulnerable with you and treat that moment as such.

Loving your man means learning his body, not shaming him for curiosity or openness. And when you're able to create a safe space in the bedroom if you can talk about the most intimate the most awkward the most taboo things that is going to overflow into the other aspects of your relationships nothing is going to be off limits because well hell we didn't talk about this and even though there may be anxiety it's always going to be he may be like you know every time i had this conversation females be tripping but that one time i brought this up to her she actually heard me you know what

i'm gonna talk to her about this the way you handle sexual conversations sensitive conversations that's how you build a safe place and this is going for any and everybody the way you handle bedroom conversations displays your emotional maturity, emotional intelligence, your ability to be vulnerable, to be respectful. This is how you build trust and intimacy in your partner. Now, when he brings up this conversation or fellas, when you bring it up, also understand there are different levels of anal play. Okay.

you can start off you know we all grown over here might as well put you out in my business a little bit ain't like

I ain't did it before right but no even if you want like an introduction just to see it could be something as simple as while you're stuck in his dick

and playing with his balls you know how the juices that spit just start dripping down and if you're rubbing his balls kind of slide that middle finger over his anus while you're giving him head just to kind of see how he reacts now of course consent is key make sure he's okay with exploring or else you can completely throw off the mood he could jump up and not in the good way but if it's something that y'all kind of discussed and he's like you know I don't know

I ain't going to say no because I ain't never experienced it, but I don't know how far I'm willing to go. That's like a very, very beginner-friendly intro, you know. If the finger on the outside, you know, you may start exploring different patterns, rubbing up and down, side to side, around in a circle, noticing his reaction. It's a lot easier if you do. slot it in while you giving head and not slot it in but couple it with giving head because it's already something pleasurable for them and they can associate the pleasure together and then the pleasure from the head can distract them from the awkwardness of playing with their butt just a tip but but no just

touching the anus and playing around it the next step would be licking or what's known as rimming nowadays and now I will also say we mentioned consent we mentioned curiosity communication but also hygiene is important this is a nurse in me coming out there's no judgment there's no shame however it is not very hygienic if your man don't work 12 hours outside been sweating you know he doesn't have to go to the bathroom a couple of times and come home and you just want to go straight for his ass when he walked with a doe. Be like that scene in centers where she's like, let me go wash up.

I walked here and he's like, I just want to taste it. But no, definitely hygiene is important when it comes to anal play. Taking your time, understanding on both sides that it's going to be awkward. on both sides it's going to be oh my goodness am i really doing this and also comfort if you have ever been on the receiving end of anal you know you've got to get through some pressure before you get to the pleasure you got to be patient okay you can't be rushing it you got to be gentle until you get that green light to go but no you can go from a light touch to licking and rimming same thing you start off on the outside explore different patterns then they have vibrations

you could do a finger vibe you know external vibration internal vibration try to reach that prostate and really get that big oath of your man and then there are some men who are into pegging they like the full stimulation of that prostate and feeling it all and that is their preference again no judgment no shame you and your partner have to have the conversation you know what are your boundaries what makes you feel comfortable what are you curious about what do you want to feel what you want to explore and then seeing how y'all can incorporate those things and take your time. Be intentional.

This is not something that you randomly do in a quickie moment. No. You need to have time if you're going to explore with this. And I'm going to just tell y'all, this ain't something I do for any and everybody. But I've never had an experience where a man did not like it. Just saying. Just saying. If y'all know by now, I love pleasure.

pleasure in life pleasure and love if it feels good you with it i'm with it it's a go for me that's just me but when you learn to explore pleasure again for men and for women it connects you to your body you are able to say i like this i don't like this when you go for pleasure it naturally draws you away from the things that are painful. It naturally draws you away from the things that you don't enjoy. Pleasure can be very healing, very freeing, very liberating, and it can really be spiritual. Like, the moments where you have the best sex of your life and you just forget who you are, where you are, just the sensation takes over. your whole thought process. Sometimes you start crying because it's an emotional release.

You've unlocked that level of vulnerability and you can't hold back and your body just, oh, lets it go, lets it out. There may be times where you may get a divine download while your nut is downloading. It may be an answer to a question that is revealed because you're so in tune with your body. The natural wisdom that is encoded in our bodies is released. The intuition is released. The answer that we knew all along finally just seems crystal clear. I want all of my men to truly see their value, to see their importance, and to understand their power.

Manhood does not have one look. it does not have one expression. You can be a man and absolutely say don't touch my butt. But it does not make you less of a man. If you say, baby, you mind licking it for me while you sucking my dick tonight? I love it when you do that. There's nothing wrong with asking for what pleases you, especially from the person that you love and the person who loves you

and y'all are committed to pleasing each other for the rest of your lives. And if it's not that deep of a commitment, again, what is your boundary? That is something you have to determine. What protects your heart? What recharges your soul? Who are you willing to do these things with? Y'all with me? Y'all thinking, y'all reflecting, how are you feeling?

Now I'm not about to give you a whole master class on. This is not a masterclass on how to play with ass. But no, seriously, I really just wanted to spark the conversation to open the door, to give a different perspective. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it. Absolutely nothing wrong. So many men are afraid of looking gay. I've had a man be like,

Listen, don't tell nobody we did this shit now. And be like, I think this is going to be my thing I asked for on the holidays and birthdays. And that is perfectly fine. That is perfectly okay. Because at the end of the day, guess what? I'm your safe place. I know something about you. Everybody else don't know.

I know how to please you in a way no other female ever has because you're exploring it with me. And when I look at you and I smirk and I say that ass is mine, you know I fucking mean it. So, man, don't let nobody punk you out of enjoying yourself. Be one of the best nuts you ever had in your life. You hear me. Especially you get comfortable and you get that vibration on there. Woo! I've seen it.

I have seen it. And it feels so good. It's such an ego boost. Ladies, it is such an ego boost. I'd be like, yeah, I'm that girl. You can't joke on them too hard, though. Can't joke on them too hard. And be like, damn, baby, I ain't never seen you jump like that.

But no, seriously. Like, have fun. in the bedroom. Like, what else are you fucking doing? People complain that sex is boring. That's why you're not opening your horizons. You're not opening your minds to trying new things, to feeling new things, exploring new things. So if you don't do anything else, at least have the conversation. Bring it up. And if you don't know how to bring it up, send this episode. be like babe look what i came across what you think about this just like that you ain't got to stick your neck out too far you ain't got to say nothing extra just open the door you never know what's

going to happen and a reminder to my women if he wants to explore it with you he is not gay he trusts you see that respect that and cherish it the worst thing you can do is when a man opens up to you and he's vulnerable with you for you to be dismissive disrespectful rude like any of that that is one difference between men and women women we'll get our feelings hurt and damn it we'll keep going back till we just beat the fuck up and can't take it no more a man you got one good time

to hurt him he may not ever tell you though but he ain't never going to let you get that close again and if you do it's going to be a long time in between you have to be mindful how you treat your man and if you the type of female just like i'm not going to stroke his ego you're going to have much to stroke either because he's going to leave you you don't like being talked to any kind of way that man don't either

you don't like being humiliated he doesn't either i rock with the women who know how to treat their man they know how to talk to him how to stay soft for him how to keep it sexy keep it fun give them something to go work for make them excited to come back home this has been a fun episode just a reminder of how important pleasure is not just for women but for men for all people shame keeps people disconnected from their bodies keeps you disconnected from your truth and it keeps you disconnected from living the life that you truly want to live. Take back your power. Own your pleasure.

Being willing to explore despite what others may say, it's not a weakness at all. The most beautiful thing a man can do is be his own man and stand ten toes on it. So whether you're into it, whether you're curious about it or you're still kind of unpacking your own beliefs around it please know pleasure isn't taboo

especially not here in the no judgment zone straight men deserve intimacy too and fellas if she loves you she can learn you and she's going to be pleased just to please you. This is your reminder that judgment does not live here.

And freedom starts when we drop the shame. So many people are afraid to live their lives because of shame, because of guilt, because of what other people are going to say. When you learn to go after your pleasure, ain't nothing holding you back. So until next time, which next week episode is going to be real good too. y'all i'm not going to tell you go to the iG page it's going to be in the stories you're just going to have to follow and see what it's going to be but stay curious stay safe and remember baby

you deserve pleasure i'll see y'all next freaky friday