No Jumper - OG Cuicide On Making People Cry, Soft White Under Belly & More!

Episode Date: June 12, 2023

Sharp and OG sit down for an in-depth conversation about OG's upbringing, family life, life choices, values, being sh*t, relationship with hosts who left and more. Make sure you check out OG's channel: https://www.youtube.com/@ogcuicideint... ----- 00:00 Intro  01:21 OG on making people cry on his podcast, Sharp says he should have tissues on deck  02:45 OG says he makes sure his podcast is a safe space and wants to hear the journey of each guest 03:55 OG shares about his adoptive mom  05:09 Sharp on OG opening up the phone lines for people to reach out  06:15 OG will never change his phone number to keep helping people  06:55 OG started to give his number after trying to work at a helpline  08:30 Sharp brings up Amanda's story from Soft White Underbelly  11:38 OG remembers a time when someone's word was everything and being real was crucial 13:35 "You can't put an age on solidness, if you're solid, you're solid!  21:07 OG doesn't do the fake sh*t, he won't shake your hand in public if he's not cool with you  21:56 Sharp was moved the first time he watch OG's interview with Adam  22:48 OG's childhood story, born a "cr*ck baby", OG was abandoned, few days later social services took him  24:25 OG was 18 months when he got to Mrs Price's home, calls his birth mom "that lady"  26:23 Where are you from? - Classified  27:06 OG was old he was adopted at 13 when he met his birth mother 29:32 The rest of his birth mom's family all lived nearby the whole time  30:19 OG had a learning disorder, held back in school a couple times, then special ed, OG used to cry about it, teachers was telling Mrs Price: "He's never gonna amount to anything"  32:52 Mrs Price started getting ill and OG was bringing drama to the house  33:53 OG was kicked out of Mrs Price's home coz he was trouble  34:58 OG got into the street life, bangin, by that point Mrs Price had Alzheimer's and couldn't recognize him anymore  36:22 OG tried to take his own life in December 1991 because he was too sad and devastated about his life  38:06 OG felt like a failure for "not being able" this go through with it: "I felt bad for still being alive" 38:49 When he left the hospital, OG went back to being homeless, people mocking him  39:22 Mrs Price came to the hospital to see him, she passed few months after in 1992  40:45 Mrs Price was everything to him, OG still thinks about her dearly, every single day 41:52 OG says it's a blessing to be alive, having kids and grandkids  45:26 OG found music to try to change his life, but he couldn't read or write  46:50 OG picked up a dictionary one day and taught himself how to read and write  47:50 Took his music to his godfather Leon Haywood who was signing artists at the time, he taught him everything about the business  49:44 Music saved his life, that was his medicine, at the time he was supposed to be on meds that made him sleep for days straight  51:17 The psychiatrist was not helpful either, he stopped going and stopped taking the prescribed pills  52:27 "Imma teach myself how to write, Imma teach myself how to spell, and I did that!"  53:06 OG then wrote his life story in his lyrics  53:49 OG tried to link with his little brother Willy, his birth mom still on dr*gs, meanwhile, his older brother Laverdus hated on OG for his lyrics  57:20 OG confronted his older brother for disrespecting him  59:14 OG tried to have a relationship with Lil Willy but it phased out, he wouldn't even talk to him now 1:00:36 OG remembers his birth mom telling him she loved him: "You never came back to get me, stop lying!"  1:04:08 People telling him he should forgive coz his family was on dr*gs, OG says that's a poor excuse 1:04:58 OG says he has 2 birthdays, his born day and the day he survived his S attempt  1:06:52 OG's first baby mom kept his first kid away from him coz he was homeless  1:08:54 OG has a live podcast show coming up June 25 in LA  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Sharp Tank. No jumper. Sharpest, coolest podcast in the world. And today, I have a very special individual. This is a very, I invited this man. I wanted this man to come through, man. A lot of people know him. And for the ones that don't, I have OG suicide in the building,

a.k.a. Let It Out. Love One. Family, what's good. Let's get it. Let's get it, love one. Hey, you know, it was actually an honor to sit in on one of your pods, one of your sitting there. Oh, my recent, yes.

Yeah, because I don't sit down on a lot. Yeah, it was Antoine. Like, I don't sit down. He had financial literacy for the credit. Yes. You know, so it was dope to sit back, man, and actually, like, tune in on one. Because I don't sit in on anybody's.

You know what I'm saying? Paws. I always feel like it's, it's, I don't ever want to like jinks, nothing, like, let that shit happen the way it's going to happen. I want to see it for what it is. But I was like, man, I'm curious because this will make, man, I swear to God, he'd have made some of the best of them cry. Like, we got to talk about it.

I know you want to laugh about it today. He's like, hell yeah, I do. Don't I'm sharp. We can talk about it. Let's talk about it. Like, man, you have made some of the best of the best of them cry, man. And it's not because you're being rude to him. or pressuring or pushing.

You know, you just, you ask certain questions that I feel like it opens people up into a different realm. Yes. You know what I'm saying? And some of the people I've saw, I'm like, man, they'd be sitting there like, there's one thing I feel like your show's slacking in.

You don't be having a box of tissues. Because you know what you do to people. Yeah. You can just already be ready. Like, come on, man. Like, already be ready for it. I'm waiting for the clinic. sponsorship. I watched Gina have to reach for her own. Like, ah, she's in there with her, you know,

with her tear. I'm like, man, we got to keep some tissue for people like that because they really open up on your show, man. No bull. Mandatory. I love that and I feel like me and you, I want to say we're similar because I try to, I try to ask too. I always try to go as deep. That's what the sharp tank's about. I try to go as deep as possible, right? Like I try to dive into the most diabolical crazy they ever been through because I feel like that's what built their character.

That's who they are. And a lot of people that sit there and try to put this restraint towards me, I feel like they're not comfortable with who they are. They don't want to talk about that because they know that's what built them to who they are. Exactly. Well, my thing is, sometimes people get interviewed

and, like you said, the way people interview people sometime, you know, they come off in a rude way to where they don't feel comfortable. You know, some people look down on people because of the life they come from, the life they lived. Me, I make sure on my show, man, it's a safe place. So you can share your story. Because my thing is, people want to know before you became successful, what did you come

from? How did you grow up? How was life? what was your life experiences, what was your ups and downs, what was your wins, what was your losses. People don't know that. All they see most of the time is this successful person. Like, wow, you made it. Well, I want to dig deeper than to their life and see where they came from.

And at the same time, let them know this is a safe place. You could talk about it. And if you get emotional, don't feel bad to shed a tear because I'm not going to look down on you. I shed tears, you know. my adopted minds the person that was always a mother to me, Ms. Price. Her birthday's coming up June 10th which is

every year is one of my most emotional days, you know? But that's my key thing, man. It's when a person sit down with me, they're going to know it's comfortability. It's no shame, nothing to be ashamed about from the toughest to whoever you are, you know?

I feel like a lot of the only fans, chicks that I interview or, you know, chicks that play the industry, it's very few that I feel like are truly not ashamed of what they do because they never really want to jump into what may have created them like that. They just want to say, oh, I'm a star. I'm in the industry. Look at me. So when I'm sitting there talking to them, they don't really want to engage in it because I don't even think they understand why they're in it. Love one. They don't really have a purpose to it. They really don't be having a purpose a lot of

the times, 80% of the times. Yes. Kind of like when you're talking to them, you ask them a question, What brought you to this? Like I'm saying? Everybody's got a story, right? You know, what brought you to it? They get resistant. They don't want to really, they don't want to engage too much.

They feel like you just belittling them. I mean, you're talking down to them. But really. And that's not your purpose. That's not the purpose. That's not the purpose, man. That's why I've loved about your show. Like, you got to talk to unique people,

people from all walks of life. Hell, you've opened up the phone lines. I told you. I was like, damn, suicide. Why don't you get a line for, like, a personal line, like to kind of have that for you. You said, nah, I can't do that. I said, why?

You said because I've had the same number for years. 17 years. And there's still be some people that's probably looking for me that that's the only number that they have. And you don't want it to switch up. You said, I'm not going to change. And you've really actually put your real number out on the airway. Faithfully. And I get called sometimes for people.

I haven't talked to in 10 years, 12 years, 13 years. And they'd be like, wow, you still got the same number. I'm like, it's important. You know, this is my, my. hot line. This is. They always have your phone on. You must have never got too fucked up after a while. You say, yeah, I'm keeping my line on for a nigga that had the same

number. Hey, phone line, the phone company, fuck with him. Like, yeah, he can go get new phones tomorrow. All the time. And my other phone, I've been had 12 years. So I got two lines. One for my business, one West, and just for my personal life. And I let people into my personal life. It's important, man, because

I've talked many people off the lay. And because I understand, I know what it feels like to wake up and say, I want to die. I don't want to live. I don't want to be here anymore. I don't have a purpose in life. I feel like I'm in the way. I'm taking up space, you know? I know that feeling.

So when I'm talking to them and they're on the other line, I really understand them. So that's what make a lot of people kind of like come to me and reach out to me. And I embrace them, you know, the way I do because they say, he get it. I know that feeling. And when I'm telling them, I understand you. I feel you. I really do. They know I'm not just saying that.

And what made me also start giving out my number, I tried to volunteer for a hotline, you know? Like, you know what? I want to start volunteer for the hotlines and, you know, really dedicate my time, you know, to that. And the people that I talk to was like, well, we would need to charge you a fee to train you, you know, for you to be able to talk on the phone

and, you know, certain things to say on the phone. I said, train me. I said, have you ever considered suicide? Oh, no, definitely not. I'm a college grad. I have a BA and all these degrees. So I said, okay, so when you really sit in there talking to these people on the phone, you really don't feel their pain then, right?

Right. He was stunned. I'm like, are you still there? And I said, why would I pay for something that I feel like I'm a professional in? I could train you, and I won't even charge you, but I could train you how to really talk on these phones to these people. because you really don't get it. You haven't walked in those shoes,

so how are you going to relate? That's very fucking true. I always say that. I'd be like, damn, church, how could you ever tell me how to jump off? And I say it all the time because it resonates. You tell me to go jump, how to jump off of a 50-foot cliff

and how to land, and you ain't never even jumped off a two-foot. But they're going to tell you there when you jump, man, make sure you stand closer to the edge. And when you leap, leap with your arms out. Right. But they never done it. They don't never do that, man.

Yeah. I always look at it like there was a situation I'd like to talk to you about. Like there was a situation on, there was a, it's called Soft White Underbelly. I think you've heard of you before. And there was a girl name Amanda that they were following her, they were following her journey. And like she started out very normal. And as the time went on, man, like you couldn't even recognize it. Like she was so far gone on a lot of things.

but long story short, they end up getting her some help. They end up putting her into a rehabilitation center for her to just all of a sudden had died. So I'm like, I'm thinking like rehabilitation centers. And when you really look at them, it's like it's still like jail. The walls aren't full of color. It's not like super full of life where people are just super positive. I feel like there's a lot of people that are working for that just to collect the check.

That's it. That's how it is. A lot of people are. There's a lot of people just to collect the check instead of really, trying to rehabilitate somebody. And man, that girl had passed away, man. That shit had hurt me. And I was like, damn, she just passed away out of nowhere.

She out of nowhere, man. I'm like, as rehabilitation centers really, and this is a while after she being in here. So it wasn't like she died from, you know, not being able to take not being on the drugs. Yes. Not, you know what I'm saying? She actually went on and was trying to have a fruitful life.

And then just all of a sudden they find her dead in her room. And I'm like, what kind of like, what's really going on? Why aren't these type of situations being assessed? And I feel like we're failing. We really are. For sure, we fail. And I don't know if I'm overreaching when I talk about that topic,

but it just bothered me when I watched it, you know? Like, and I've seen the situation, I'm like, damn, like she just died in there, bro, just randomly. They were putting her through like this virtual, like this virtual rehabilitation in there to where like they would put her in this VR and they would put her back on Skid Row and make her walk around and like pick up a bottle of liquor

and like it's all real man it was like I'm like what kind of stress test is that I didn't under really understand I feel like it caused stress on her it caused her to have a mental relapse just like a person on drugs right it was a mental relapse see you know what I'm saying

break that shit down bro like some rehabs you go to not everyone is good. There are some rehabs, like you said, they're there for a check. They don't care. They're just going to give your meds and they can care if you live or die.

Just like in convalescent homes. People, how are you harming old people like this? You know, they don't care. They're there for a check so they can care less if you lay in this bed and you get bed sores. They don't care. They're not doing their job, helping them get up and making sure their hygiene and everything is good.

The same with rehabs. Everybody that's in a rehab. Yeah, there's good people everywhere. But at the same time, you're starting to see more bad than good in the world. That's the world we live in now, man. And you're starting to see more people just bad. And the bad is here. The good is here.

You know, it's starting to be outnumbered, just like realness. You know, when we was coming up, man, the word real or the word loyalty, the world, keep your word. It meant the world. to us and if you violated it, you would get your teeth knocked out your mouth. You know, now it's a coming... No.

They don't say that no more. I swear to you, and I know half the motherfuckers is going to be in the comments, they're going to call you crazy because they're scared. But it could be somebody like me that says and they'd be like, oh, Sharp's old. Sharp, no, I'm not even old. I just grew up on their whole different...

And it ain't about being a learning trait. Like, I learned a totally different mixture than a lot of these kids or a lot of these people because they be grown-ass people that be on the bullshit. I say this, honey, there was only, there was one time. I've only seen it one time in my life. I was driving down the damn street. And I'm passing the fucking, I'm passing a bus stop,

and I see a, like, a heavier-set white man in a hospital gown, still the hospital socks on, like the little jacket that goes over it, and his name around his neck at the bus stop. he escaped no he they obviously he had his name around his neck yeah yeah yeah I'm saying like they put like a big ass sign of his name around his neck like pretty much like

booted him out of the hospital like y'all know this man don't even know how to tell people where he even live like that or who he is but they just put him out and just sent him out to the world he's standing at the bus stop waiting like with his name around his neck they don't care like on a big ass blacker card like got his full name right there

they don't care man and and some people look at it like, oh, man, this person is hard to deal with, but this is your job. This is what you signed up for. To deal with, you know, whether it's mental or physical. You know, whatever it is, people sign up. This is your job. This is your occupation. You sign up for this, you know, just like we were speaking on, you know, loyalty and everything.

It can't say you old because you can't put an age limit on solidness. Right. You know, no matter how old you are, if you're solid, you solid. You know, so you can't say, oh, well, solid is just for people this in this age, that's for the old people. That's what y'all did back then. Like, no, no, this is, this is, that's one thing where you don't break the cycle. You know, you break the cycle of growing up in a household and not everyone was financially stable. Or, you want to break that cycle.

Or, okay, everybody's giving their life to the streets. You want to be different. You want to break that cycle. But you can never break the cycle. solidness. Like, that's just something you don't break. And I'm seeing that a lot. In my age, like, it means nothing. You know, a person can tell

you something, and look, you dead in your face. Dere in your face, like they're being solid with you or being honest with you. As soon as they spend that corner, man, everything they said, honey, meant nothing. It's crazy because I've seen that. I've seen that in life

and all this resonates with you. Like, where, like, I've looked out for people that don't even ask for it. Like, I see you fucked up. Yes. And I see like, hey, my nigga, like, and I rock with you, I rock with you. Yes. To four, five months later, don't even, nigga can be five days later.

Yes. Nigga, act like, nigga, they never even fucked with you from the beginning. Straight out. It's crazy. The era that we live in, my nigga, it's really no respect and like, hey, know who really fucks with you, homie. You better. Not everybody out here, my nigga, just trying to see everybody well.

No. Or see their people around them doing cool. You know what I'm saying? I don't want to see you doing better than them. You know? They don't want to see you doing better than them. You know, that's just life. And to look out for people, like, man, I've done that for so many years.

And then you start realizing, like, some people really just around for what you do or what you give them. Or yeah. And how you find out is cut it off. When you cut it off. You start to see what they really own. They vanish. Yeah. They disappear.

The phone call stopped. all of that. They didn't checking up on you. You've had these experiences. Oh man, for years. I still go through that. Still go through that right now to this day. Did it ever stop somebody like OG suicide

from really trying to still help? You know what I'm saying? No. I still be in that same type of place. You know, Ms. Price, she embedded helping in me because I used to always see her help everybody. And when I was young, I didn't understand it. And I used to be like, dang, like,

who's all these different people at the house? and she's giving money and she's looking out and making sure they got clean clothes and I didn't get it until I got older and I started realizing. As if it's in you, it's in you. Yeah, it's not on you, it's in you. And I learned that and I became that person, you know,

and a lot of times it's the people that's close to you. At least the ones you consider close to you that you call family, that you call loved ones, you know, that you embrace. Then be the main ones, loved one, they'd be like, like, I'm a, I'm a latch on and get what I can. It do, it be the most disappointing, like, when you, when you're heart-breaking. But you know what?

I'm going to be real with you. I never let, like, even people would say, like, you know, Sharp has mother issues, like, no matter what me and my mom went through, yes. It would never, I would never take it out on the next person. They don't know my life. Yes. Whether it's a woman, whatever, she might be tripping on her own accord.

I'd never sit there and say you act just like my mama. Yes. I've never used those. bro, I've never in my life. And that's the terminology that people have used. Yeah, I've never used that, like, to be like, oh, man, you acting just like my mom. No, I hold everybody accountable for who they are. Individually.

Individually, man, I'm not going to let, and my long story short is this. I'm not going to let somebody dictate mentally how I move with the next. Yeah. You know what I'm saying, bro? Like, I'm not going to allow that. And I just feel like more people should move on that same type of a chord, man. Like, the world would be a better place. Yeah, it'd be a better place.

Like, like you said, with Ms. Price, like, look how she moved. You know, she, I'm sure she got fucked quite a few times out of helping somebody in situations. People come around just for what they can get. She probably helped the same person. They'd have probably fucked her three times. She still helped them up four times. And I've done that too. You know what I mean?

I found myself in them same shoes as her continuously helping the people that you know is not right. Right. You know? Having a good heart. can be a blessing and a curse at the same time, you know? But then there come a time to where you kind of get overwhelmed and burnt out. Like, you know what? I love you, but I'm going to love you from a distance, you know?

Because I'll be done did something to you. And then I'm going to feel bad afterwards, but I can't just keep allowing this to happen. I just can't. You know, I know who I am, you know? And they know who I am. But they take that kindness and kind of like, oh, you know what? He ain't tripping.

He don't let me slide. It's cool. Oh, he let me slide again. Then it becomes a habit. I talked to, I was on Chinamax podcast. I was, what are you what I'm saying? Shout on Chinamack. Chinat.

I was on Mac talk. And he was asking me, like, some about, like, my uncle, like, what did you learn from, like, what was the most valuable lesson he ever taught you, right? And what I said kind of fucked him up because he didn't really, I don't think he really understood it too much, but after we broke it down, he kind of seen what I was saying. I was like, my uncle taught me, man, that ain't nobody your friend. Ain't nobody your friend, man.

Because you know why people always talk that talk, well, I'm your friends. You know, he told me you ain't got no friends. Mother's got to show you. Show me that you was my friend, niggins of my dying day. That's when I say, hey, man, yeah, you was my real friend. You got to be there because everybody always claimed if they, man, we brothers or we cuck, whatever. Everybody play these, this playhouse shit, you know what I'm saying?

But really don't know what that shit really stand for. Like, when you call somebody your brother, you're supposed to move like that. You're not supposed to move like a friend in a shitty situation. Move like my family. Straight out. Friends to me or family, I'm like, if I consider you my friend, nigga, you got to be my family. Straight up. Mandatory.

I don't fuck with everybody. At all. You know what I'm saying? So, like, I just, I look at it like that was one of those values. Like, not everybody's your friend, man. not, you ain't got no friends. You either got family and you got nothing. Yeah, straight out.

You know what I'm saying? Yeah, and the people you call family. And people you call family. There's some that's going to disappoint you, but then there's some that may not even, you may not have even been knowing them that long, and they become family to you. And they'd be more solid than people you've been knowing for 30 years plus.

That's the part that really gets you. The people that don't underestimate you, respect you. You ever notice that, like, the people that don't know how to lay a finger on you, they don't know what you capable of, respect you the most.

It's the people that know you the most that want to fuck you the most. You know what I'm saying? Because they feel like they know your limits. They feel like they've grown to know you in that aspect. Yes. And I think that's bullshit, homie.

You better stand and act like you don't know what the fuck I'm capable of. Man, I don't know. Because that'll piss anybody that's real to fuck off. Well, I think it comes with continuously leave forgiving. Now I'm more on, you man, I'm older, I'm setting my ways, I got zero

tolerance now, like, you got one chance, and that's it. I can't fuck with you. I can't even shake your hand in public, and it's people I've seen that I don't fuck with, if I don't fuck with you, and you put your head out, I'm going to look at it straight out. I ain't with the faking.

I'm just not, you know, and there be people that see me in public and they're like, oh, damn. Like, let me test the temperature. And let me go say what's up to him. And I don't care where we at, if it's just me and you there

or a gang of people, how I'm moving, how I'm feeling, it's going to be expressed. I don't bite my tongue for nothing. Tell me a little bit about your upbringing, man. I've heard your story before I've watched your interviews, like I watched the one that you would deal with Adam. I ain't going to lie.

I was never so glued than how I was to that TV when I watched your. joint with Adam. I watched it a long time ago. I actually reached out to you about it. Yes, yes, I remember. I remember you did. I was like, damn, love one, I was like,

you really. And my number was on there publicly. Yeah, like you really touched home. You know what I'm saying? Like, I didn't even go to your number at the time. I just went straight to your DM. I was like, man, hey, I just want you to know I fuck with your shit, like, and I hear your story on me and like that shit's real, you know,

but I want to walk down that path with you again. The ones that, you know, got to catch that, but are the ones that didn't get to catch it, you know, and they can catch this one now. For sure. Walk us through a little bit of your childhood. We definitely going to go. Okay. Well, my life starts off with me being born. Moms and pops, I don't even like calling them that, but biological parents, they were drug addicts.

So I was actually born a crack baby. What year was you born? 69. I was born a crack. Crack was here. Crack was thriving. You know what I mean? Yeah, it was thriving.

It was thriving. It was everywhere, you know. So was at home at our, the apartment we lived in, and me and my older brother, we were abandoned. And we was left there for like several days. And the neighbors kept hearing, like, kids crying, like, constantly crying. Like, it's middle of the night. It's been a few days. These kids won't stop crying.

So the authorities and the social services, just came, entered the apartment. They took us, separated us. My brother took him to a home, took me to a home, to Ms. Price home. That had to be fucked up, though, because your brother at the time, that was who you knew. Like, that was all you knew. And I was 18 months. Yeah, but still, like, that's all you knew.

That was it. To separate y'all, man, that's a devastating blow. It is. And Miss Price's home was a home where she kept foster kids. like temporarily, you know, so you can bring kids to her house, no matter what time of the day, what time of the night it was. She was temporary home until they figure out, okay, you're going to be here until you either go back with your parents

or we put you in the system. Right. Yeah, bless you. Thank you. And Ms. Price, when she first, you know, got me, you know, she used to tell me how my body had. I had eczema over like 90% of my body. So she got you at 18 months.

And I was 18 months. And she was older to when she got. Yeah, and I was 18 months, and she took care of me, you know, and really fell in love with me, man. And, you know, went on head and went through the process because Norma Jean, she went back and got my brother out the system, but they never came back and got me. Norma Jean is your mother. Well, yeah. Well, your biological mother. Yeah, I just call her that lady.

But, yeah. So, Ms. Price, by them not coming to get me, and the social workers should come to the house. and pretty much was letting Ms. Price know like, well, what we're going to have to do is come get him and take him from you and we're going to have to put him in the system, you know, and figure it out from there. And she was like, well, what if I want to adopt him? And they said, well, if you go through the steps,

you already keep foster kids. If you want to go through the steps of the process and with the courts, then you can. So that's what she did. And she ended up adopting me. And that was my mom. mother, you know, she took care of me, you know. I remember they used to, I had eczema so bad, I remember they used to tie socks, you know, on my hands. So I couldn't scratch because I was

scratched until I bleed, you know, like from my neck down, like 90% of my body was just covered rash, eczema. Oatmeal baths. Yeah, yeah, all of that. And what they, that and what was that? It was a, what was it, colomine lotion? Like a pink, looking that you put on your skin as well. Yeah, a real, real thick. Yeah, very thick. Yeah, bro. So she old schools.

I know you're just... Yeah, so, you know, she adopted me. Love me as our own. I could do no wrong in her eyes. And, you know, I grew up in the neighborhood, you know, in Compton. Her daughter... What neighbor are you from?

I mean, you know, classified. They know, but, you know, yeah. We all... They know, they know, you know what I mean? If there's one nigga, guy on question moving through the city of Los Angeles. It's you nigger. I swear to God, bro.

I promise you on Jesus Christ on the Bible, bro. There's one nigga all question like, nigga, is you, church? For real, for real. Man, though. You always been solid on you. Mandor. And that's all I know. If I can't be solid, bury me.

You know what I mean? Barry me. If I can't be solid, get rid of me. What I'm here for? I'm taking up space. You know? For real. So Ms. Price raised you. Raised me. Adopted me, raised me. You know, my last name was changed.

My original last name was Pate. My name was changed to Price. But my original last name was P-A-T-E, and it was changed. Grew up on my 13th birthday. I always thought Ms. Price was, you know, that was my mom. Because they never told me different. Even though a social worker used to come every month, and ask me questions and stuff like that,

but I never understood or knew what that was. But on my 13th birthday, you know, I'm in my room. Ms. Price come get me out the room and say, I want you to meet somebody. Like, okay, so, you know, I come out. I come in the living room, and, you know, I see a heavyset, dark-skinned lady sitting down,

and she have a teenage son with her, you know, an older cat. And she said, I just want you to know that this is, your real mother. I'm like my real mother. I'm like, you're my real mother. And then that's when they kind of broke down. 13th birthday. 13th birthday.

And that's when they broke down the story of Ms. Price really told me what happened. Well, we end up adopting you because you was abandoned. This is your real mother. This is your real brother. And she let me go with them that day, too. You know, so I went, met other family members. And I remember it just didn't feel. right. It feels uncomfortable.

Well, I would think that it would feel that way because not only it's your 13th birthday, you think you're about to spend it with your mom who been raising and for her to come in and pop in the room and just say, bro, I swear the way you said that, like it sound like some shit my grandma would walk in like, hey, somebody

want to meet you. That's how our people was back in the day. It wasn't like, hey, and they were some Gladewater, Texas. Yeah. I'm going to sit down to you and explain to you how this happens. No, hey, bring your ass ass up in here. You're about the experiences for yourself. It was real life experience. Very real. And so to not only go through that, but then to leave that day and go with them, you know, to another place.

It was so uncomfortable. Like, hold on, give me a week to know who these people even are so that way I could feel comfortable about even taking this trip with them. She let me go with them. That's like, that's like hopping in the car with somebody you never met in your life and driving four hours somewhere. Going on a road trip for four, five hours. In my mind, I was wondering was I coming back. that's how I feel I don't know these people

and I went to met aunties and cousins So that probably was on your mind The entire time The whole time Yeah like am I coming back You know that's how I felt I didn't know And I'm meeting the

I'm your auntie you When that happened We were young And we wasn't able to do nothing for you Because we was still young And I heard all the stories Like okay I found out where they lived

You know Which they lived in Compton Like 15 minutes from where I live the entire time. The entire time. The entire time. So I go back, you know, they bring me back later on that day. And Ms. Price does.

She sit down. That's when we really had a sit down. Because when I was growing up in school, I always had a learning disorder. You know, it was hard for me to keep up with the classroom. I couldn't. Being a drug, born a drug baby, you know, it really did something to me. And it used to be to the point. to where I did the third grade like two times.

I just couldn't get it. I couldn't figure it out. I couldn't get it. So they, back then, they held you back. Now, they get rid of you. Back then, they hold you back until they can get you prepared. I was held back. I was held back to the sixth grade.

Yeah, I was held back two. I stayed in the third grade two times. That's because the nigga was bad, though. Well, bad, and plus, I couldn't keep up with the class. So, you know what I mean, Ms. Price. And that, I was. devastated to be being kept back? Wait a minute.

This is devastating. These is, these, the people that's in the second grade, so I'm going to do the third grade with the second graders, now they third graders. And I remember, you know, I mean, I used to cry about it. You know, I used to be devastated behind it. I used to be upset. So, especially when they started putting me in special ed classes, you know, I went from a classroom with 15,000.

20 people to a classroom with four, five at the most, you know? And I remember they used to tell him his price, like, we don't think he's ever going to amount to nothing. So what we feel like you should do is put him on SSI and just let him live off that for the rest of his life. Junior high school, same thing, special ed class. For some reason, learning in school, I learned more out of school than I did in school. I just couldn't keep up.

I couldn't spell, didn't know math, couldn't read, couldn't do any of that, you know. And it really affected me to where I started ditching. I stopped going to school because I feel like why go to school? And then when I would be in a regular class and I couldn't keep up with the class and I couldn't learn fast enough, the teacher would be like, oh, at Enterprise, there was a teacher name Ms. Brown. That was a special ed teacher. Oh, well, you need to go to Ms. Browns. You know, every class, it would always go to Ms. Brown.

And like I say, that really used to bother me. When I got to high school, same thing. Ninth grade, I'm like, you know what, I'm good on school. I'm good. I didn't do it no more. I just couldn't do it no more. And when I was growing up as well, I used to bring a lot of drama to the house when I was like 16. During this time, Ms. Price was sick.

she had got like stomach cancer she was sick and she was older you know so I used to bring a lot of drama I remember going to um I end up going and I went and did some time you know what I mean some some juvenile time and I remember them calling the camp you know what I mean come Gonzalez I remember them calling up to the camp saying somebody shot the house up and miss price was the one that opened the door and there was a guy standing there with a 12 gauge. And thank God she was able to close the door fast enough. So she was unharmed. And when I came home, you seen buck shots like on the little water drain and on the door

from them dumping. And I'm in camp and it's like, had me on the AWOL, but it was nothing I can do. So when I came home, Ms. Price was sick. and her daughters, they pretty much, they had put me out, you know, when I was 16. You can't stay here no more. You bring in drama. Back then, I hated them. Couldn't stand them.

But as I got older, I understood it. But during that time, y'all really going to put me out? Nowhere to go but the streets. So that was it. So I'm staying here. I'm staying pillow to post. I'm standing at this homie house, this homie house. Man, the homie trout, rest in peace.

I remember his mom used to get on him like daily, you know, because I'll stay at his house, sleep on the floor. His mama coming in the morning, like, why is this boy still here? He ain't got nowhere to live? Why this boy keeps staying here? Where do he live at? And Pell of the Post, I don't sleep in front of people houses, man.

I don't sleep in garages, cars, you name. I'm hustling, grinding, doing everything possible that I could. through the process I'm in the gang life gang banging heavy all I know is go hard that was all I know go hard if I'm gang banging I'm gang banging and whoever the enemy is they're gonna know me they're gonna know me personally because I'm gonna bring it I'm hustling doing what I could I was 21 I remember I went to go see miss price at this time she had a Alzheimer's and I'm standing there you know, in the house talking to her. But she don't even know I exist.

How was she when she had Alzheimer's? At this time, Ms. Price was, I was 21. So she had to be. She said she was older when she adopted me, she probably was like 40, 40 something when she adopted me. So she was like around 68, 70, around that age. She was already up there. And age.

And I remember standing. there talking to her and um it i was just blew away man just seeing her like that like this is somebody i know loved me couldn't do no wrong in her eyes right or wrong she she's she go right with me you know and and it was really devastated by it and that tore me up then plus how i was living you know that really man it hurt me to the core so um life you know life what's going on December the 31st, 1991, it's when it actually happened. It's the day I woke up. And prior to that, man, I just had suicidal thoughts.

You know, it was really just going through my head, like, what am I living for? It seemed like everything I tried to do to get it right, it just wouldn't work. It wouldn't pan out. It just didn't happen. I would have it going good and then something would happen. And I would be here and now I'm here. You know? So December the 31st, 1991, man, I actually took a gun and put it to the side of my head

and I squeezed and I pulled the trigger. And I remember when the gun went off, it was two of my homies there too. I remember the homie was like, man, side, what you doing, man? Why are you playing with that gun? What are you doing? I said, I'm not playing with the gun. I'm not playing. I'm not playing.

Like, this is it. Ain't no need for me to live no more. And I put it to the side of my head and I squeezed. And I remember falling and hitting my face. And I remember it got bright, like it got unbearable bright to where I couldn't keep my eyes open tight bright. And then all of a sudden it got dark, like pitch black, couldn't see anything, didn't know where I was. Then it started getting bright again. But my vision was blurry.

completely blurry. And as my vision started coming to as I opened my eyes, I'm looking up. And I realize, you know what I mean? It's a light almost like this in the hospital that's over me. And as I start looking around, you know, I'm like, damn, I feel bad because I, like, damn, I guess I am a failure because I couldn't even kill myself.

I really felt bad I was still alive. It bothered me that I was still alive. And as I start looking around, I realized I was in the hospital. And then I started seeing doctors just scrambling around people moving around, almost like Frankenstein. Like I was Frankenstein. He's alive. It's alive. It's alive.

They start asking me a million questions. Like, how do you know your name? Do you know how you got here? Do you know where you at? The typical questions that they asked. And when I got out to hospital, I was still living the same. way. I was homeless, but now I'm homeless with a gigantic bandage on my head. I'm still staying where I could. There was people laughed at me. You know, ah, idiot. He shot itself. You know,

I went through it, love one, and that put a lot of stress on me as well. Just those moments of like, I'm still in the same situation. I'm still here. And I remember before I had out to hospital, Ms. Price's grandson, Tweedy, I remember he brung Ms. Price to see me, you know, when I was in the hospital. They brought her to see me, and I remember her standing over me, you know, and she was more like still kind of in her moment of not knowing, you know, the world exists. And I remember, man, just, you know, I raised up, you know, in my bed, man. I remember laying my head on her shoulders, you know, she was standing over me and she put her arms around me. And I really feel like after that, she died. They didn't tell her, I shot myself, they told her

somebody tried to rob, which I'm glad they did, that somebody tried to rob me and they shot me in the head. And moments after that, she died, like she died in August of 92. It's when she died. and I really feel like that was a burden on her. Seeing me like that, you know, was a burden on her, and I really feel like that's when she was ready to leave. Like, she didn't want to be here no more. And I feel like I put that burden on her, you know? Her devastated seeing me like that

because that was my everything. That was Ms. Price was my everything, loved one, meant the world to me. still do to this day and look what year it is and she passed in 92 it ain't a day i don't think about her and a day go by like you know even with things i'm going through now i'm going through things right now in my life you know as we speak and i have dreams about her and i know them dreams that i have about her is her actually coming to see me and visit me to let me know she's watching over me confirmation that it's going to get better.

Keep doing what I'm doing. It's going to get better. Life going to get better. You know, you got to grow through what you go through. You know, that's my model now. You know, I got so much tension and so much pressure and just every day. I carry a lot on my shoulders, not just my life, but others' lives. You know, some days, man, I said tears.

You know, some days I'll be sitting in my room. and just thinking about life. I'll share tears for joy because I'm definitely, I'm happy to still be here after, if you made it through the 80s and the 90s and you still here, that's a blessing. Definitely a blessing.

And the day is me coming up gangbanging, I never thought I would live to have kids ever for nothing in the world. I have four. Second thing, for nothing in the world, you couldn't have told me many years ago that I would have grand. kids one day. I have five.

But none in the world never believed that I would ever live this long to see that. And I did. Do my tears of joy. The situation that I don't really want to put it out there, but that I'm going through, people that know me know.

You know what I mean? I'm not sure we spoke, but we'll talk about it off camera, but going through a situation, man, that it's pain. You know what I mean? It's definitely pain, you know, pain that eventually it's going to go away. I know it is, you know, and it's in due time.

I can just say in due time, it's going to go away. But at the same time, what I do, I signed up for, me answering my call, taking calls, people going through things in life, and at the same time, I'm going through things in life. But I signed up for this. So I always been a person that take my life and sit it to the side to help others, to help others get theirs together, to help this person do this, or to help who I can. And I always feel like with me, with my life,

sometime I'm better at giving advice than living advice. That's something that I learned about myself, that it took me many years to figure out. It never, homie. Like, and I hope they don't go over people here, what you just said, only, like, that's, it's a gift,

but a curse at the same time. A gift and a curse at the same time. I can give you the best advice in the world, but sometime... Can't take it. Can't take it. You do. Nothing else.

I just gave somebody that worked for them. Yeah. I'll fumble the ball on. But it worked for them. So I find that happening in my life. You know, like I said, I mean, I could give advice, but sometimes I can't live that advice that I gave,

but I know the advice I'm giving is from the heart and I meanness, and I stand on it, and it works. Bro, you've been, you've been an inspiration in my life as well, like, just even, like, because I wanted to know, I was like, man, what really made him pick up that gun that day and say, man, fuck it, I'm about to opt out, nigger. Fuck what everybody's talking about I don't care if y'all gonna miss me I don't care if y'all gonna hate me

I'm not gonna give a fuck about none of that shit And I knew I was going to hell And knowing that you're going to hell I know I'm going to hell Didn't give a fuck Well I'm ready I feel like I'm already

I feel like I'm already That's the ace with the kicker right there The four aces with the kicker man I feel like I'm already on fire Then fuck it how much more can I burn I'm already on fire I'm already living a painful fucking life. Like, fuck.

I just can't figure it out. Shit wasn't working. Started doing music, you know. I got out the hospital. One way I thought about changing my life is doing music about my life. Couldn't read, couldn't write, you know, at the time. Still, learning disorder was definitely something that was, a blemish in my life

you know, it's me coming up. Then you're taking something like that because that's a fucking blow. Yes. Taking something to the heads. You already had problems with learning and things like that. Then you say, fuck it. Here, I'll put a bullet in it. Maybe that'll fix it. And I really

and I really feel like I didn't blow my brains out. I just compacted them. Because it seemed like I got smarter afterwards. It seemed like I really started learn. I ain't go lie. It's kind of sick when you say it's nowhere around it. There's nowhere around it.

I didn't blow them out. I compacted them, you know, and I flatlined. That was the thing. When I got out the hospital, it was people seeing me like, what the fuck? Like, the hospital said they didn't expect you to make it. You wasn't going to make it. That's what I was hearing from everybody. It was like, man, you wasn't going to make it, man.

That man upstairs was like, you know what? I got something for you to do, you know? And I really feel like that brightness and that darkness, man, was them signs, you know? Man upstairs said, man, I got something for you to do. I started getting a dictionary. I used to read, that was another way that helped me learn how to read, Love One, a dictionary, because I could see the word and I could see the meaning.

And I started getting beats from my boy Lee. And, you know, back then we was writing it down with no phones and none of this stuff. and I would just write the word to where I know what it is. You know, it wasn't spelled right. I get it. But I know what it is. When I look at it and I read it, then I know what's where it is.

And I started doing, we would record in the Hummy Kurt Garage. We had like a fucking four track back then, you know. Just the beat, the vocal, the hook, and whatever you do on the fourth. You know, then we end up getting a six-track. So the great Leon Haywood, rest in peace, who became my godfather.

Dre used his beat for, G. Fawkesi Brown used his song for Bad Mama Jama, the great Leon Haywood. We took the music to him because he was signing artists. You know, he was working with artists. And we played it for him. The first song I wrote was Final Exit. how I came up with the idea

for the album and that song Final Exit there was a book I bought called Final Exit I can't remember the author but this book I just stumbled up on it in Barnes & Noble's and Final Exit was a book that was about people that was suffering from a terminal illness

they were dying and pretty much was on their deathbed and death was their final exit how I was living, the life I was living, I felt like that was my final exit. The way I was living, that was my final exit. So I talked about in my song about my real life, homeless, robin, stealing, abandon, you name it.

That whole album, self-titled album, suicide, suicide with a C. Heywood, put me in the studio, embrace me. He taught me the game. He taught me the business. He taught me about contracts. He taught me all that. Put me in a studio. Had a lot of cats, man, that was legends.

My first album, I have not topped it yet because every instrument on my first album was live instruments. From the drums to, you name it. Even the claps. We had somebody getting a booth and literally clap with their hands and record that. And that album, right now to this day, it came out in 95. will always be a classic album. And like I said, Heywood became my godfather,

embraced me, taught me the game, showed me the ropes. Life started getting better. Life started improving for me. Music became my thing, man. And it really felt good to just be in the car and you driving around, man, in the 90s. And you pulling up on people

and you hearing them listen to your music. It was the days right there, though. Yeah, you flagging them down. Like, man, thank you, man. And they looked, picked the cassette tape up like, it really feel good. It just hit music in the streets, man. And that right there, it spoke to me.

Like music's a piece that saved you? It really did. You know, to me, music became my medicine because they wanted me to take these pills called Cinequins. I was seeing a psychiatrist. And I stopped going to see the psychiatrist because, okay, I come here, I sit here,

I tell you my story, you give me medication, I leave, I take these things, I'll sleep for days. The only thing I may get up to do is take a piss. But this shit is knock an elephant out. And I start realizing like,

why do I keep going there? What's the point? What am I achieving? What am I accomplishing by seeing the psychiatrist? No rehabilitation. Nothing. None.

Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Okay, we're going to put you in this program, help you do this. I was my rehabilitation. Them pills made me more miserable and more stress than I was before I shot myself. I stopped taking them. This ain't me.

This ain't working. This is slowing me down. It's not helping me. And then I'm going and I'm sitting and I'm talking to this lady and you jotting down these notes and then you sent me on my way. I stopped going. I stopped taking that medicine. I got better. I started thinking smarter. I couldn't think off of that shit. I couldn't do nothing. I didn't want to do nothing. I didn't want to do nothing. I just wanted to sleep, rest, lay around. That was it.

Almost puts you almost as like a live vegetable. I damn near felt like trying again. That's how that medication had me feeling. Like trying again. Like you know what? This shit got me depressed. It got me miserable. It got me not wanting to live. I'm taking something that's supposed to help me, but this got me not wanting to live. When you got off, is that when you turned to the music?

Is that when that became your medicine? Yes, yes. That became my medicine. You know what? I'm going to teach myself how to write. I'm going to teach myself how to spell. And I did that. And I did that.

And I did that. So damn, you did that through music. Through music. Straight through music, love one. everybody have a gift and a purpose in life and everyone just have to find out and figure out what's their gift what's their purpose. Everybody have a purpose in life.

But you got to figure it out yourself what it is. A person can give you all their advice in the world. Oh, I think you could do this. So I think you could do that. No, you can advise a person, but it's up to them to find something that they love. music became something that I loved. And now I'm talking about my life, what I went through,

being abandoned, been a foster kid. All the things I went through, the life I lived, you know, final exit. Another song I had called This Shit Is Real, because everything I talked about in that song was real. The shit is real. Music became, my medicine became my hope. And I shared my life through my music.

and it became a revolving door for everybody. People really loved it. They gravitated to it because they was relatable. I'm going through that. I've been through that. I'm a foster kid. I was abandoned. 22.

I remember where Narmajinem lived because later on I find out I have a little brother. Yeah. I want to get to knowing. He has nothing to do with what I went through. He has nothing to do with me being abandoned. I go over there in Compton. Still the same thing.

Still the same thing going on. She's still on drugs. My brother LaVerdes, he can't stand me. Because, you know, everybody hear my music. He say, you know, that's messed up what you say about our mom. I said, your mom. Not mine. My mother name is Essendee Price.

So you went to go visit him. Yeah. You went like you pulled up. I think I remember you telling this story about. And Compton on 133rd in Wilmington. Yeah. I went to go see him. And I could remember him standing out there, you know.

How was he at the time? Let me see. I think he's a 53, so I think LaVerdis is probably like four years older than me. But we looked like. You were 22 at the time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. When I, so, so I was 22, let's say, he was probably about 26, 27. Yeah, 28, 29, somewhere up in there. Yeah. So he told me, oh, man, that's messed up with you saying your music. You know, you're telling lies. I said, didn't we get abandoned? He's like, yeah, well, where's the lie?

Nick, I'm telling the real. And if you feel some kind of way, nigga, we can get in these streets, nigga. Because to me, you're nothing. I don't feel like we bleed the same blood, nigga. I'm over here to see little Willie. That's my little brother name. And he used to tell little Willie like, oh, that ain't your brother. I used to go take care of little Willie, make sure he was good,

make sure he had money, take him to go get clothes. Like, it's my little brother. He don't have anything to do with nothing. You know, he came after the fact. I'm going to embrace you. I'm going to love you because you're my little brother. We bleed the same blood. You're my blood brother.

Laverdis got in his head. You know, he would, he would function with me here and there, you know. And then Laverness eventually got in his head, but he was older. And he started acting weird. You know, I would call. I could remember one time I called him, and his girl was like, oh, that ain't your brother. I ain't never met him. I don't know him.

That ain't your brother. Broad, I don't know you. This is my real brother. You're speaking on something you don't know about. So he started acting weird with me. I stopped calling. Like, you know what? I'm good.

And then I find out I have another brother, Frankie, and I have a sister named Lynette. And that's when I met Frank, you know, which was my father. That's when I first met him. And I was 22. Stayed in L.A. So you was already pretty much set in your ways at that point. The 22 is like, looking anybody's, yeah, what can't anybody say anything to you at that point? If you ain't Miss Price, you can't tell me nothing.

Because you wasn't there for nothing. Are my OGs that I respect to the fullest still to this day? Can't tell me nothing. At all. First time I meet this dude, how I found out they tell me I have an auntie that stayed down the street from them. Her name is Kat. So I used to always go for about three weeks I would go knock on Kat's door

Be knocking, babbing on the door She would never answer One day I see the blinds move I'm like wait a minute Like a nigga I'm not tripping And I'm like Cat Like I'm Frank son I'm your nephew

Like I was adopted You know I was abandoned but I'm your nephew Next thing now she opened the door I go in and I talk with her We're sitting there And I see what they call her cat too She had like about 14 cats in the house I sit down

I think it was uncomfortable Because they was They was everywhere Swimming around But did she tell me Where Frank live Like yeah you got a brother Name you know Frankie

He's in jail You know He's in jail He's doing time He's in the feds You got a little sister named Lynette Lynette was like I think 11 at the time

So she gave me the address and call them, you know. I meet my grandmother. I go over there, meet him, meet Lynette, get Frankie address, you know, so I could, you know, write him. I want to know. Me and Frankie, we cool to this day.

He lives in Arizona. You know, we cool to this day, man. But the first time I met Frank, first thing this dude says I'm 22, like, man, pull your pants up. Nigger, you don't even know me. How can that be the first thing you want to say to me? You don't even know me.

And you're still a junkie, nigga. You still over here doing drugs, nigga. I'm here to see Lynette. That's the only reason I'm over here. That's it. And I used to go see my little sister, and I would always go by there. And it really just used to fuck me up to see them,

to see these motherfuckers that left me for dead. And I have to look at you, motherfuckers. but I love my little brother and I love my sister. So much, I would walk through hell with buckets of gas for them. So that's all the reason I must keep coming to see them. And I did. And eventually, Love One, like the contacts and everything just, it was like a phase.

The shit just came and left. You know, we don't communicate or Willie. Like I said, he started acting some type of. away and if I was to see him today I wouldn't even say shit to him I'd tell him to get to fuck away from me nigga I don't give a fuck I come from the streets but I still got a motherfucking heart and y'all play with I was born with my fucking feelings being played with straight out I came in this motherfucking world with my feelings being played with that shit is fucked up I didn't ask to be here and then the shit with y'all left us over you're still

fucking doing. I'm 22. I met you when I was 13. Now I'm 22. You mean fucking tell me you still doing this shit? Like, where's life? I remember Norma Jean standing on 133rd crying telling me she loved me. You don't even know me. How you love me? You came back and got Laverdis. You didn't come back and get me. Where's the love? Where's the love? What love? How you love me? What's my favorite color? Do you know what I like to eat? Do you know anything about me? You don't fucking love me. Stop lying to yourself.

Hey, Donnie. Hey, pause it right there. Let me go use a bathroom. We can grab me some ice. Because this one's going to run for a little second. This ain't no quick one. I think we already don't ran for about an hour. That's all good.

No, I'm coming right back. Let's do it. Oh, yeah, I got you. Let's go. Do your thing. Grab me some ice. Do your thing. Do your thing.

Do your thing. No. Yeah, family. Oh, yeah, real life, man. Real life, but I got to keep functioning, you know. I got a purpose, man. And I got to keep going. You know, trying to change the world one person at a time.

People in the world, one person at a time, man. It's important. When you're ready? Running, Donnie. I'm ready. All right. So you were pretty much saying, how can you try to sit there and say you love me

screaming in the street that you love me you don't even fucking know me you don't even know me I'm a practical stranger to you and how do you love somebody at 22 years old it's like you missed everything you missed everything my whole being of who I even became like I don't even

I don't expect you to respect it or even understand who I am today And I really don't give a fuck. I can care less if you respect it. But how you love me. That nigga to tell you first thing, pull up your pants, boy. Yeah. Yeah.

You're lucky. You probably ain't get socked up. No, but see, that was the thing. I told him, like, man, I'll beat the brakes off you, man. You don't fucking know me, niggas. So you really, I'm just here to see Lynette. You went to your sister. You went to originally see your sister.

That's it. You know, she was 11 years old at the time. And it was with your pops at the time. Yeah, they was all living together. Yeah. and my brother Frankie he was like I said locked up he did like 19 years but man Frankie we still cool to this day

you know he the only one I fuck with like I said um it was like a phase you know like that in families like when the one boy that didn't get the much love he only gets and there you have a whole bunch of siblings you only fuck with like maybe one or maybe two and it'd be the one he least expect

like that keep that shit 100 and me and Frankie it's one you know and my cousin Sakein. You know what I mean? He keeps it solid. He's one of my cousins who he's a twin who I met you know when he was younger. But like I was saying like

Nicky didn't ask to be here. You know? Didn't ask to be here. I was born. Like when you got older like and you felt like pulling that trigger. Is that why you felt like that you was like damn I ain't to be or am I just a waste of space?

Like am I that at this point? You know what I'm saying? Well, my thing was, I kind of felt like how I was living. Yeah. I feel like a burden.

You know? And trust me, when I say I was doing everything in the world and had apartments, start slanging out of them, got raided, lost them. It was like I would be here. Boom.

Now I'm here. here I'm here again life is good money's good then it come that curveballed boom I'm back in square one you know like I said I was born man my I was born in a fucked up situation you know born a crack baby you know like it's it's really sad then people will be like well you can't really be mad at them they was on drugs that's a fucking excuse You was born into the darkness. Yes, straight up. He was born into it.

I was born in the darkness, loved one, and everything I went through, I have no regrets in life on what I went through. It's a true definition of it. And one thing I did do, I took that darkness and I created a light around me. I was born in the darkness, too, loved one. Straight out.

I feel about it. To be real with you, I think that's what we all do. We find that light. You have to. You have to. Are you going to stay dark? Once you start to fucking realize that, you got one life to live, nigga.

You ain't about to, you better live multiple through. And I had a second chance. Yeah. You know, I have two birthdays, July the 30th and December the 31st. I have two birthdays. Reincarnation, December 31st, you know?

My life was spared. God spared my life. He sent me back for a reason and a purpose and since then, man. I always do good by people, you know? I feel like you got good. was there a point in time that because I'm going to look at it like this

for you to touch the place that you touched you obviously believed at one point there was no God there hadn't been to you like there was somebody like you like who is it like I want to meet him like who is this as letting this fucked up shit happen to me and they say never question God

and I can remember times I can remember our neighbor in the neighborhood Bruno I could remember sitting on his porch all night in the rain, Thunder storming. Just out there all night. I'll have nowhere to go. Straight out.

I'm doing whatever there is to stay afloat, to get money. I'm doing it all. It just wasn't adding up. Holidays come around. That she used to wear me out. That she used to tear me to fuck apart. Just seeing family together and being, you know what I mean, having good times together and good labs together, you know?

Like, there's a lot of things. Yeah, it made me hate it. Yeah, hated life. Hated life. And I used to get invited over to, you know, to the homie's houses. And it used to just didn't, it didn't feel right. I don't fit in here. Yeah, y'all love me as family.

I love y'all as family. But I just didn't fit in. It didn't feel right. It just didn't. And I would leave. And I remember holidays used to, I used to tear up a lot around holidays. That she used to work me. You know, it really used to fuck me up.

And then when I started having, you know, kids, like my first two, my first daughter, you know, that was born, man, her mom, we didn't get alone. And she kept her away from me, you know. But when life was good, life was good. You know, but then when life was bad for me, now I'm just, I'm just fucked up person. Now I'm just, oh, you're a bum. Where you're going to Where you're going to sleep Have your daughter at in a cardboard box

I'm homeless I can't see my seed Regardless of anything This is how you get at me So that you know Was another reason Not being able to see my daughter She wanted to hurt you bro

Like even though you was already hurt Even though you was already hurt She wanted to hurt Hurt you even worse And like I don't know if it's in a person's mind Because the type of people that me and you are ain't too much ain't too many tinks

you can put in the armor you know what I'm saying so I think a woman realizes that too so they don't know when they really stabbing you deep they think that you can take it because nothing affects you nothing bothers you

you've went through the worst but some do it intentional and they do it intentionally especially when I built over the years I didn't have family Ms. Price

that's my family for sure You lost her a long time ago. Yeah, lost her a long time ago. Long time ago. So I didn't have family, you know. 92, right? Yeah, August.

I built my family loved one since a young cat to, right now to this day, off of people that come into my life. You know what I mean? That's why I got so many little bros and nieces and nephews and unks because I built that. Me and you've become family, man. Man, though, we are family. You got damn right.

You got damn right, hands down. And likewise. And to not, you know, break the moment, but you also have a live show that's coming up, man, to let it out Love One show. June 25th. June 25th Club here, Let It Out Love One. This is going to be my first official show

of me doing my shows in front of a live audience. that's my goal, that's my dream, and anything I've ever put my mind to, I execute. I bring it to life. I don't care if it take me a year, two years, three years.

However long, I've always executed with it. And I also do my life, Mando, Mando. That's off the dribble, man. I cannot wait to come in, you know, we never know who's going to open up for it. I think that's going to be dope, man.

Mando. Come out and just, you know. Mando. Then plus, you know, my artist performing, you know, as well, my son, a little side, my nephew, Dre Hill, my little bro, Izzy. We got, you know, my brother from another mother, the native, his artist, Blaze him up, is performing as well. But my thing is, I really want to take my show to a different level because I also go live. Like today, I'm going to be live answering questions. Live at five.

Four. Four. Four. I'm going to be answering questions on live. I'm taking up all your time. No, it's cool. I'm going to be answering questions. I'm ready to start answering them questions in front of a live audience.

Because that pain I feel through the chat, I would love to be able to walk up to somebody in the audience, love one and embrace them, hug them, and let them know. I sincerely feel your pain. I get it. I understand. So that's definitely

Where I'm going with it, Love One. That's why I'm going with it, Love One. You know? That shit is important. You and I think people out there that are in the content creators world And what they're creating, I think they can all agree with me when I say like, Man, you've got a lame, bro, for it.

Like, for real, like, my lane is dope. Like, you know, because I try to find it through I try to help the young, man. Like I really do this tough love Like I know they might feel like they getting roasted Or they might feel like but man you need to hear this And you know what I've noticed A lot of people that I interview that they sit there and say like

Oh Sharp went hard on Then people go and apply the shit that I say And that said that it worked You wanna know something? So I know me and you we owned to something You wanna know something? What? Sometime

We on to something People don't get it unless somebody go hard on them Go hard on them man I didn't You know? A prime example, I never knew what it was like until life really went hard on me. Life showed me like here, man, this shit.

And it's silent day. And then I went hard on myself. I had to. You know what I mean? Because like I said, I remember I used to go through so much shit and they said never questioned God, but I remember I used to, I would be shedding tears, loved one,

and I would just be, why. You feel like shedding some tears right now? No, I'm good. I'm trying to get you. I feel. I'm trying to get you. I'm sorry. See, look, I'm to let it out, King.

I thought I had you earlier. I'm going to let it out, Love One Dine. But you corrected it and got back on course. I almost had him earlier. I ain't going to lie. I forgot at what point it was, but he kind of. When we talk about Ms. Price, he had to catch it. When we talked about Ms. Price, oh, yeah.

With the fans see that, I almost had him. I know almost don't count as much, but it means something to me, damn it. When we talk about Ms. Price, for sure. I'll let it out, Love One, Mandel. Because she loved it. me, man, and she didn't have to. She didn't know me. I was a stranger.

Is that what makes you... That was delivered to her house? Is that what makes you love people, even when they tell you suicide? You don't have to. You tell them, I want to. Straight out. And that shit's important. It's very important.

That shit, that shit rocks volumes. And you know, man, like, I know there ain't a lot of you out there. I don't vary. I don't vary. You know, and if there is, they're different. The ones that are... The ones that are, man, I just want you to know, like, you is just one person. You impact thousands.

Yes. Like, you are a thousand. And I don't do it. And I don't do it for a pat on the back either, loved one. Yeah. You know, I can't express this enough. Like, my, my channel. Love your channel.

I love your channel. And I haven't made a quarter from my channel yet. That just goes to show that I really do this from here. I have not made one red cent off my channel. But what I'm doing and what I signed up for, I'm not doing for money. I know the money going to come. That's one thing about me.

Even as a hustler, when I was in the streets grinding and had work, as long as I had the product, I know the money was going to come. That was going to be my next question because I was curious. I'm like, does he do this for... I don't even want to say,

do you do it for the money because I don't think you do, man. Well, I haven't made nothing from it yet. And to know that now is crazy. And I do it from here, Love, right. Like, I mean the world. And I can't turn back. I've always been that one that I dive in here first, whatever it is.

Me and my broad epidemic, I wanted to start a magazine, 2013. We on the phone, regular conversation. I want to start a magazine. Dove in here first. Didn't know nothing about a magazine. Nothing. Our first couple of issues had typos and all of it. that but guess what? I didn't

stop. We kept going. We kept going. We kept going. Magazine still exists here to this day. One West Magazine. Clothing line. Like, I'd always dive in here first. Let me get the feature. We finna, we finna, no, what we're doing. We're getting ready to

start back printing. And I'll do it, hey, and I'll tell you this. I'll do it for the F just because, like you said, it's giving back and just even letting people know, like, just a buy-on me and, like, just what we're trying to because that's what I've tried to do is, man, I'm just trying to give people better game.

Like, come on. Like, I know I come from some fucked-up shit, but you don't got to. Like, I got you. Like, I ain't gonna let you have to sweat and they have to be cold outside like I've had to be. And I feel like, and I've said this shit before,

like even with knowledge, like you try to give, we were talking about earlier, you try to get somebody knowledge on me on a normal tip, like not on a tough love type of mixture like we were speaking on earlier. They take the knowledge, bro, and they put it in the closet and the shit collects dust.

They can't spin that shit. No. You tell them and you push it on them and you let them know it makes them think. Like, damn. But always remember, you can't force success on nobody. Well, damn it, we need it. If they don't want success, loved one. Hey, you know what?

You can't force it on them. Just like a person on drugs. Right. Now, you need to get off drugs. It's killing you. It's destroying you. Yeah, I hear you, man. I hear you.

I hear you, man. I hear you. I hear you. Until they make up their. mind on their own to say, I don't want to do this no more. Right. They're going to continue. I've seen it for a long time though and I just want to break the cycle.

If that's the case, just like you were saying earlier, like we were talking about Ms. Price and like how many people she helped, right? And even though somebody fucked up, she still didn't mind to help them again. I still want to push the issue. Even when people don't understand it at times, I want to say, oh, Sharp's just going crazy. Sharps doing this. No man, I love all these people, even if I don't know them. And if I see that you're on some wrong game and you're on some faulty shit, here, we can always clean that up. Because you don't want to, I don't want to see you go down the road and now we can't change it. Well, one thing. Now we can't change it because there's always

sometimes, like you say, man, we can't go back on some shit. But one thing I've also learned too that I had to realize. Because I've always been one. When I was in the streets, factor out the neighborhood. I've never been that one that... I love how you threw that in there. It got moving. Factor out of the neighborhood. You know what?

Exactly. But I've never been that one that encouraged anyone to go do what I was doing, the life I was living. Because that's what people used to say, well, you're doing it. No.

But I've always been that one that encouraged people to get money. Yeah, y'all see me doing this and don't do that. I'm with you on getting the money. But I'm not wet watching you throw rocks at prison because you see me doing it, throwing rocks at the prison because of how I'm doing, how I'm getting down out here in these streets. So I've always been that one that inspired people to get money.

Do you believe in breaking that cycle? Yes. I damn sure do it. Like I was in a conversation. earlier and it was like, you know, it's built to keep black folks down. I'm like, no, man, we got to change the way.

Like, we got to start thinking past that shit because I feel like sitting there saying what they're doing to us and where they're keeping us down, ain't going to move us forward and put the positive energy into changing this shit. I want to be the game changer. You know what I'm saying? People may

they may, you know, get mad. But what I'm a say, but I don't bite my tongue because I don't like the pain from it. A lot of shit. Hell yeah, you eating some good shit and you're figuring around to bite your tongue. That shit hurt for me.

A lot of times, a lot of shit that go on in the world, too, we do to our self. Here's why. Because as people, and I'm not just going to say one race, as people, we don't come together the way we should. We don't help each other.

Um, a person Can have something I hope motherfuckers just heard what you said And they really need even for the ones in the back man I'm gonna repeat it around real shit Um A person man Can be doing

You can be doing the same thing Same exact thing I got these pillows For sale I got these pillows for sale Something as simple as well For other people They got the pillow

for sale. Right. Same ones. Same color. Same color. Same color. Same manufacturer. Nothing different. It's just in a different hand. But they would rather go buy it from them than buy it from you because it's you.

That's the mentality that people have loved one. So a lot of things we do to ourselves. Support is free. All support is not financially support. It's just not. you feel like us as black folks do you feel like we 100% support each other like other

other like we see you know the Hispanic crowd they support each other 100% they do the um the Asian crowd they respect each other 100% they buy up all this land all these properties they work with one another do you feel like we're doing the same thing as black folks coming together and really trying to take over this shit because last time I'm I we're supposed to be one of the strongest things fucking moving. One of the strongest things moving. So I don't want to ever sit there

and try to make an excuse of why we don't have something. I want to figure out where we can change it and get it in the fucking our favor. Well, you know, I need to know. Change. I'll keep it more simple. No, no, no.

No, no. No, no. I don't do simple. You know what I mean? Say it how you say it. That's how I want to hear it. Yeah. But that question you just asked me,

99.99% of the answer you want for me, you already know yourself, but you'd rather hear it for me, right? You do know that answer, though, right? You don't have to hear it for me, right? You minding the Oracle from the Matrix. You don't have to, you do know that, right? The Oracle from the Matrix, like, when you buy it into this cookie, you're already going to know how it's days.

Yeah. You already know what you're expecting. I'm just saying. No. 100% no. That's good game, homie. That's good game. No, 100%.

That's good game. I like the way you broke it down. You could have kept it simple and said, well, no. But you said, you know the answer. You're looking for it. You know what I'm already going to say. Yeah. You just want to hear it.

No. No, the answer is completely no. We, we, we, there's a saying that people say we got to do better. Yeah. Not everybody understand that. You know? Some people, the way I look at it, some people, man, the way they move,

it's like a fucking stain. Not all stains can be removed. Not all stains can be cleaned up. You know, some stains remain, you know? And their mentality, how they move, how they get down, how they think, it's like a stain. Pretty white carpet. some red wine

some red wine and you spill it you know some people don't get it you you you you get the stain out I do and I don't think it's subliminal but some people got to they rub the stain in

so it never comes out so they don't understand it the mentality and it's how they was raised how they was brung up I want to ask you for sure Good question. Do you feel like, out of all, like, I'm sure you watch the news.

I watch a news, right? I get up in the morning sometime, man, I watch CNN and shit like that, right? And, like, I see what's going on in other countries. And I'd be like, I see how, like, other people acting, like, what they entertain and what their beliefs are and things like that. Do you feel like, like, out of everybody that you've seen, what country do you feel like is the laziest? in how we move as a whole.

Because I'll tell you my idea, I feel like America is because... I agree with you. And the only reason I feel like that is because we have so many amenities versus other countries. They don't really got that shit. So they're under dictation of certain law.

Like, nigg, motherfuckers is moving accordingly, on me? Get your motherfucking hand chopped off and stuff on some dumb shit. Some countries, you can't even watch the negativity that you watch on social media in some countries. You know I had a man. That's being forced fed.

Right. To everybody. Right. There are some countries where it's not allowed. It's not allowed. They don't watch that. They don't watch that shit. Oh.

It can't even watch it. No. They just can't. It's impossible. I have my barber, man. Shout out to him, man. I call him Cuba. I call him Cuba, but he goes by Brian.

Brian's his real name. Shout out to him. He'd be cutting me up sometimes. I go see him. He's from Cuba. And he was like, he was like, man, it's real bad over there, man.

He started telling me, you know how a barbers you should do, you talk to him. And we was chopping it up. He was like, you know, he says, I'll never forget. He said, man, motherfucker went. He said, man, we're out in the streets and the city, man. He said, we're out, you know, move. And he says, he said, this motherfucker went in the middle of the street. He said, like, he wanted to be free.

He said, I just want to be free. So that's all I want. Like, he said, he's screaming in Cuba. He said, man, he just wants to be free. Yes. He said, man, like, he says, somebody walked up. I don't even want to say if it's a police. I don't want to say if it's their government.

they politics, but he says somebody, man, they walked him and shot him. Like, you're not allowed to say that. Not allowed to slander the government. You ain't allowed to-sertan laws. Talk about certain shit. Like, you ain't talking about free, what are you talking about? Yeah. Like, you're going against the grain.

You don't blew a microchip. Hold on. Let's hop you out. Wow. Got to remove you. Yeah, remove you. Because if you're saying that, eventually somebody else to catch you on and start saying that. And then it's a domino effect.

Broad daylight. Yeah. Popped him. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Definitely. I just think about some of the things that other countries go through versus what we go through as America as a whole.

You know what I'm saying? And like what we really have to endure. Like, man, we have a lazy country. Nobody wants, and why I say that. Well, it's actually the people. It's the people. Because the country is just a country. Well, you know what I'm saying.

And I get what you're saying. And I like the way that you put that. That's even further into the fact of, in the matter of it and, like, You're right. It's the people. It's the same thing with the game. I always said that with the game.

It's not that the game change. It's the players. Yes, always. The players change. You know what I'm saying? So they're not going to have the same outlook or stand on the same morals. Somebody's going to get lazy through the mix and feel like there's always a shortcut instead of getting your motherfucking ass up. And instead of expecting the respect, make them fucking respect you because they have no choice.

At all. It's a difference. Big difference. For real. Big difference. Then I'm excited. to come to your fucking show. Big difference, man.

I can't wait, love one. I really can't wait to just... This is going to be a great one. That's what I feel like we're here to do. Like, it's a great conversation, but I feel like we're here to celebrate, man. Mando. It's going to be a good one, man.

Every day above ground is a celebration. It is. You know? Because I can remember looking back on my life back in the days I used to hate waking up. Like, what am I waking up for? I know the feeling something. I don't know what it was like.

Like, I had no reason, no purpose. Yeah. You know? Yeah. I really didn't, but then I had to learn, like, especially giving a second chance at life. You know, I'd have been hit with a yopper before, too. I got a two, two, three round in my back, you know? Cats, we out in the neighborhoods, some cats just came through knocking, and, you know,

A.K. Bullet is nothing to play with. And that bad boy tumble. And it's like one of them things, made for real, still be living. And stood up on my feet the whole time. Me and one of the homies got shot, you know, what's like a bro, too. me, you know. A bullet went through his back, came out his chest. He lost the lung.

Laid on the side of the house, like bleeding, you know? Bleeding. Bullitt hit me in my stomach, ripped my intestines completely in half. My surgeon was a female. That two to three real. Yeah, my surgeon was the female from Iraq. You know what I mean? That was a nurse in the war in Iraq.

That did. And they were going to shoot that shit. And they cut off. What's the odds of that? Both of the bad parts on it and reconnected it because intestines will grow back. But what's the odds of getting a doctor that specializes in something like that day? Because not everybody's around and getting hit with two, two, threes. No.

Just every day. No. And I remember. And my son was in the house when it happened. He was 10 years old at the time. And when the bullet hit me, like, I was more angry than anything. I could think about, you know what I mean? And it seemed like they was getting closer and closer.

closer, closer. And all I can think about is, my son is in the house. Classified. All I can think about is my son was in the house. I love that. He heard me too. He said, yeah. I listen as well.

But all I can think about is, my son is in the house, and my uncle Glenn was there. And the paramedics, you know, they, it was crazy. And I remember going to talk to my uncle Glenn, and I told him, I said, if I die, make sure my son know I love him make sure he know that and you let him know that if I don't make it I went there and my son was standing there

like stunned how was it 10 and I'm like man everything good son you know but I'm standing there and I didn't no blood came out you know and I'm standing there talking to him and

I called his mom and and told her to come get him, I just got shot. She's like, well, how you got shot and are you talking and come get my son? I'm shot. So when they told my son that I was in the hospital because I was shot, my son was like, no, my dad ain't shot.

He just came in here and talked to me. This ain't, this the shit you didn't ever tell nobody. See, I like that about you. Like, you always keep your stories back. You always got something like, because, like, the first part was, like, shit that I kind of knew, but then you kind of veer it off. showed us a little something different.

I never know if you got shot, standing there talking to your son, man, in the fucking kitchen. Another time I got shot in Compton, a cat I've been knowing since he was a kid, you know, had my Hummer at this time. And, you know, it was his birthday. It was in the garage, chilling.

And like, you know, I'm going to stop by real quick and say what up. I'm standing on my phone. And I remember somebody said, watch that car. It was a decoy car. by the decoy car was the car to get the attention for the car behind it with the hitters in there and I remember I'm on the phone and I was leaning on my um hummer and I turned and I looked

and when I looked you see the front window and the back window come down and they start knocking I got hitting the leg but I was so close to them so close to them love one I'm surprised they didn't air me out. That's how close I was. I was so close I could have spit on them. And they better be glad I didn't have a thumper in my hand because it had been a rap. But that's how close I was.

And I was hitting the leg and it was kids out there. But I'll take a bullet for a kid before a kid take a bullet. I'll die for a kid if I got to. And that's what happened. It was kids out there. And I got hit. I was the only one got hit.

But I was okay with that. Just as long as no kid got hit. And I was willing to, like I said, take that bullet for one of them. And I did that. Straight up. Now, do it again if I got to. That's just how I move, love one, straight out. And I mean that from the bottom of this.

Ms. Price embedded something in me, man, that it's not going to ever leave. And when I love people, they know I love them. they'll never question or think twice if I love them or not because they're gonna know straight out because I show it

if I love you got love for you I ain't gonna lie you're gonna know it you always been a solid nigga with me I don't give a fuck like me

I just know what I know you know what I'm saying like I don't know like just just from certain conversations and certain things like the way you just I don't know

like you know what I'm saying like I'm gonna be solid with my dick a drink man I'll drink that grandma Yeah, nigga, man, here, nigga. Yeah. Merry Christmas, nigga. Yeah.

My nigga right here, like, for real, like, because he do shit that, like, niggas don't even be knowing, like, it's love, homie. See, my thing is, I'm gonna be solid with everybody, love one. Yeah. Until they become unsolic. There won't ever be a time, ever.

And they have ever, never. And I can say never, and I stand on that. There's never been a time where I was the one that wasn't. solid. It's always on the other side of the coin, of the ones that's unsolic. And once you show me,

you're unsolic, I feel some kind of way. They say in order to kill a weed, you cut it off at the root. There's a lot of shit that you told me, right? That didn't present itself until later. It's crazy. I kind of looked

at you like, niggins, this thing is stripping a little bit. Like, niggas, no. Because I be thinking, as I'm smart, I'm a very wise man, right? Like, very good judge of, like, certain situations. And then, like, it was a situation. Like, I don't even want to, like, embark, but just even say, I'm like, damn. I see later on, like, me, this thing was hella right.

My nigga. Like, I don't know, like, just know that, my nigga. And I don't mind admitting that right here on camera, like, for real, like, as a real nigga. And I respect that. Ms. Price, she taught me two things. You is silent on me. I ain't going from, my nigga.

Ms. Price taught me two things. It's all as fuck. If you don't have nothing good to say, don't say nothing at all. The second thing, Ms. Price always taught me straight out. And the second thing, Ms. Price taught me, loved one, and I'll never forget it. If you don't, when you speak,

stand on what you say or mind your business. there's been many times I see things I see things from a distance and I'll tell a person like look XYZ I always get the face of

I don't know what I'm talking about cool give it time and then voila I'm just a real nigga though it unravels I'd rather tell you on camera for the world to see like where I felt like I went wrong with it You know what I'm saying?

Like I looked at a situation. It was only one. And I'll talk to you about it when me and you could chop it up. But like, it was something you had said to me that I was like, I don't know. I questioned it. You know what I'm saying? I get that a real nigga. I get that a lot.

I mean, I get that a lot. But I was wrong. And you was right. I'm not going to speak. If I'm not one million percent sure on what I'm going to tell somebody, I don't care who it is. If I'm not one million percent, sure. Yeah.

I'm not going to say nothing. I'm not going to speak on it. Yeah, no, you was one and it don't even matter. Churches just know that. Like, it made me look at you like, all right, listen up a little bit more. Oh, yeah. You know what I'm a real one. I like to learn, too, love one.

Like, I'm not knowledgeable to everything. Like, so I like to learn on me and, like, you've got to open years. I like to learn. Yeah, for sure. And I can learn from people younger than me. Yeah, me too You know? Some people feel like

I'm older than you Then you can't teach me nothing No no I can learn from people younger than me So I'm always open to learn But like I said Miss Price taught me them two things And I'm not going to speak

If I don't know what I'm talking about And if I'm not one million percent Sure Go ahead, love one Sure I'm not going to speak Straight out I left the flow

I'm hoping for you. They can't. He's not going to speak. Whatever the fuck you talk about, just know. I meant it. I mean, I did. Or I wouldn't have saying that thing. Oh, my mom, were for real.

Neff, no. You know, I'm not going, if I speak or something, oh, yeah. Got to ask, how's the relationship been, you know, because you and AD are tight. I love AD. That's my father. That's my father. Exactly. Like, that's my partner.

I love him. And I promise you, I'll get that nigga the shirt off. You know he can call me tomorrow, my nigga, and the world would never know it was even my t-shirt. He's all right. I don't even roll like that. Like, they didn't swear it was his. You know what I'm saying? But I got to know how's the relationship been

and everything been since, you know. Our relationship is the same, man. And really, technically it's not a breakup. You know, our relationship is the same. Well, not with, not even saying with you per se, but just, you know, the ties being severed and just, you know. Well, my thing is there's always room for growth in life. Of course.

You know, there's room for growth. But our relationship is the same. That's nephew. You know, my mom. I should never miss a beat. Yeah. You know? Straight out.

We got that understanding. You know, he gave me his blessings. I give me my blessings. You know? And that's what it is. That's what it's going to always be. He definitely. With us, fuck all this podcasting.

Fuck any of this shit. Yeah. Before any of this shit existed, we was always solid with each other. So there's nothing that could go on that can change that. We dialed all the way in. We grandfathered in, you know, for life, you know? And I don't go against the grand.

I feel like me and A.D. are definitely, I'm going to throw my limb out there to say, me and him are definitely grandfathering in. Like, I love bros. Okay. That's my dude right there. Like, no matter what happens throughout the mixture and all of them, no matter what took place or how it took place,

I love them, you know what I'm saying? And, hey, I wish everybody the best, my nigga. Hey, hopefully we see everybody at the top together. At the end of it all, maybe we need laughing. Maybe you should have a sit down and have that discussion. Yeah, I would love for that. I would love for him to come. Listen, I would love for T.Rail to come.

Come sit down, even do know. House phone, come sit down. The invitation is open. I'm waiting for him to hollet me and say, hey, man, I'll come sit down with you sharp. Yeah. Come on. I'm going to sit down on eight joints.

I'm going to let you, you know, put that together. Yeah, I will. You know, because that's for you to put together, you know? For sure. Definitely. For sure. I was just curious in how, you know, because I think the people want to know that. You know, so when you speak on it.

I don't go off what the people want to know because the people are going to say negative things. Fuck what they say negative is what you're supposed. I never worry about what anyone say. As long as I know, fuck with anyone say. Fuck would anyone think or anything. That's my nephew for life. Riding with him to the wheels go from being round to square again. Why I say that is because I think that's going to speak volumes when it does come out.

So people can already know when it's already been addressed. I mean, but they know. People know. This ain't the first time I mentioned it. Sometimes a little bit of reinsurance for these motherfuckers on me always. go a long way just to let them know. Like, that's how it's stand. That's how it stood then, and that's how it's going to stand now.

So it's going to always, we was all just hanging out last night. You know, video shoot, hookah lounge. Yeah. Oh, yeah. They're my niggas, man. I love them to death. And like I said, yeah, I'm definitely open for them to come sit down with me, you know, despite anything.

And we're going to sitting down with them and being on a joint. I've already been on there many times. I'm going to let you create, you know what I mean, that narrative. I'm going to let you create that connection. Yeah. Because it's going to feel better coming from you than anyone else. Well, that's why I'm saying it right here right now. Understood.

You know, the world to even hear where I stand at with that. You know, just to, man, they're more than welcome. Nigger, I'll come open the door for them. I'm that type of nigger. Man, shit, I'll open the door for you, man, what you need, man. Let me know before you come so I can have a year for you. You know, they got more than me. Hey, man, the utmost respect when they come and sit down with me.

Oh, yeah. I would love to sit down with them for you. For real, most of that's what's up. Is there any message that you want to send to the world to the Sharp Tank viewers to the OG suicide show and just letting them know, like, is there anything you want to leave them with today? Definitely. To start with, there's nothing in this world that could go on in your life, rather bad or good. nothing in this world that can ever go on in a person's life to ever make them want to take their life. Nothing.

I don't care how bad the situation is. Every storm shall pass. And I've said this before. There's three types of storms. There's the rain that drizzle, the thunderstorm, and the storm that hails. Everybody life is different. Some people have things going on in their life. That's more of the storm of the drizzle of the rain.

Some people have storms going on in their life. Life is semi-bad. Almost bad, semi-bad, and then there's people that have the storm of healing in their life. It's all bad. But at the end of every one of them storms, loved one, I guarantee you the sun will shine. I guarantee you it's going to be bright again. Them clouds are going to go away.

But a person have to be doing everything in their power to assist with that. And how you do that is getting out there going for it. You want life to get better. You got to look at your life and say, well, how can I make my life better? Okay. This is how I can make my life better by doing this. and executing with this. And by you doing that,

you put an umbrella above your head for them storms. Straight out. You're protecting yourself. You've got to protect yourself at all times. At all times. You've got to really want it out of life. Whatever it is you want.

Rather, music, a job, whatever it is a person choose to do in their life, they got to go double time hard for it. Straight out. Nothing comes to a slum. sleeper but a dream and a nightmare. So they got to go extra hard for it to put that umbrella above their head

to protect them from them storms. And them storms are going to go away. Trust me, I know what if... I've been through all them storms. I've been through all them storms. My shit had a few earthquakes involved with it, with a ground ship. But I had to get it together and figure it out if I really want this. Just like they said, I would never amount to nothing.

You know? I remember sitting in Ralph Jake Bunch Elementary in the fifth grade. I remember them telling Miss Price. I'm not going to be nothing in life. I'm not going to ever be able to own anything, do anything, accomplish anything. And, you know, I remember I used to, you know, I laid my head on her shoulder and I cried. I cried hard because I didn't get it. I really was listening to someone that wanted to dictate my life.

But I made them a liar because I did the total opposite of what they said. What they're going to do? I did. I own companies. I help people build entities. I've been on the other side of the world with music with no record deal. I can spell, write, read, math. I can count like a motherfucker.

I've seen a lot of digits in life. You know, I mean, from the streets digit to now to legal digits. And I know how to count. I can add, you know, ads attract, all of that, you know. One other thing, and this is always a quote that I always mention, a hospital, not the only thing with patients. And you can quote that. You can definitely quote that, a hospital, not the other thing with patients,

straight out. And if you want it in life, you've got to go get it. Because in this world, it's not on you, it's in you. You know, people got to realize that. No, they don't, though, church. They got to realize that.

And I've noticed a lot of niggas and a lot of chicks, a lot of men and women, run around, being, like, trying to portray something like, that ain't even you. Be who you are. Don't just hop in the setting for a fatter for a fucking style.

And I'll say that, man with every bit of fucking truth inside of me, man. I get tired of watching that. It's too many users around here and abusers. Not people who want to win and help see other people win. That'd be the fucking problem, man.

And see, when people want to see you win, they see you win because they assist you in winning. They're the people that want to see you win. Straight out. They assist you in winning. You ain't got to question it. You see the difference. You will see who really want to help you

compared to who never helped you. There's a big difference in those. And I had to learn that. I had to learn that over the years, man. Especially with me, loved one. Like, my word means the world to me, and I stand on it. I live by it.

If I say I'm going to do something, I'm going to do that. Hey, come fuck with me again. Mando. Man. Man, man. Shit, we ran it for a nice time, man. What we had with it?

Donnie, how long we've been running? Yeah, man, I think we did right. I think this one right here was much needed. Mandatory. And for the culture. Mandatory. For all walks of life. Every skin color.

Because I do it for all walks of life. I do it for all skin colors. I do it for the young and the old. Yeah. Straight out. Talk that shit. All nationalities. We out of this motherfucker, man.

Yep, yep. The Sharp tank. No jumper. Sharpest, coolest podcast in the world. Let's go. Hey, Donnie. Let it out for us, love one. 25th.

Let it out. Let it out, Love One. Go get your tickets. Link in my bio. Go get your tickets. Get your meet and greet tickets. Awesome. And always remember, I can't express this enough.

Grow through what you go through. And don't forget a hospital, not the only thing with patience. Peace. Truth needs no support.