25: No Such Thing As A Randy Rat In Polyester Pants
00:00We ran it on QI a few years ago, which was, there's no such thing as a fish.There's no such thing as a fish.No, seriously, it's in the Oxford Dictionary of Underwater Life.It says it right there, first paragraph, no such thing as a fish.Hello, and welcome to another episode of No Such Thing as a Fish,a weekly podcast coming to you from the QI offices in Covent Garden.My name is Dan Shriver, I'm sitting here with three other elves,Andy Murray, Anna Chazinski, and James Harkin.
00:32And once again, we've gathered round the table with our favorite factsfrom the last seven days.So here we go in no particular order, our favorite things from the last week.Anna.My fact is that rats wearing polyester pants can't get erections.What, how did they find this out?So this guy, it was in 1993, and it was Dr. Ahmed Shafiq,and he dressed up 75 rats.
00:57We just established why he did this first.Yeah, he wanted to see if polyester decreases fertility.It's science, Dan.Okay.So yeah, he split them into five groups,dressed one group up in cotton trousers or pants,dressed another group up in polyester pants,another group up in wool pants,
01:13another group up in 50-50,which I think is what most people wear, right?It's like 50% cotton, 50% polyester.And yeah, they have to wear these pants continuously for six months,and then he shoved them in with a load of women,female rats.No, maybe that was where he went wrong.And none of the women got pregnant.
01:33Sorry, yeah, he shoved them in with a load of female rats,and he found that the ones wearing polyester pantstried to mount the females,and their ability to penetrate them was significantly reduced.And the idea is synthetic fabrics are bad for you, is that it?Yeah, actually that's,so he said that, but I think that's controversial.A lot of studies say wearing polyester boxes
01:53might reduce your sperm count, but...How weird.Yeah, but then I read quite a good quote from a doctor saying,how come during the 70s and 80s,when everyone was wearing tight polyester clothes,suddenly the human population didn't decrease rapidly?Yeah, there were a lot of advances in other areas as well.I was only working a while with the only variables,
02:12what kind of pants and trousers everyone was wearing.Yeah, so anyway, he thinks the reason this happens,and the reason that it maybe happens in humans,but the reason that it happens definitely in rats,is that it creates kind of a static electricityaround if you're wearing polyester, tight polyester.So you've got electric genitals.You've got electric genitals.
02:29Sounds like a great band name.And the sperm hate that.Okay.And I found this out in a book called Bonk by Mary Roach,who we love because she writes excellent books.So Bonk is a scientific approach to sex,but it's really well written, it's a really entertaining read.I thought I, when I heard the fact,
02:46I read into this guy just very quickly,because I wanted to see what kind of character he was,and there was a great little thingthat Mary Roach had found out,that he was Nobel Prize nominated.But the thing is, she checked up to seeif he was Nobel nominated,and the rules of Nobel are that
03:01they don't reveal who the nominations wereuntil 50 years after the nomination itself.So you can go around, she's saying,put that on your resume.You can go around saying you're a Nobel Prize nominated person,and no one will ever know.But he also performed the world's first bladder transplant.He also did the same experiment on dogs,
03:18which I find, so I think he might have just reallyliked putting pants on animals.He was quite clear in the studythat he washed them every time they were soiled.Rats do soil themselves a lot.They urinate almost all the time.Oh, well, that's a lot of washing then.Yeah, unless it was just number twos that he was cleaning up.
03:35But so rats urinate all the time everywhereto attract women, female rats.They also we on food to marketers edible.Standard practice.Yeah, females will we on a malethat they particularly like.Male rats will do the same to females.Young rats will we on older rats,
03:52and no one knows why they do that.And dominant males regularly we on their subordinates.Non-standard practice.No.That's a lot of weing to be cleaning up after, isn't it?Do they have to constantly drink?Assessantly in the pub, just downing pints.Got to win a guy.
04:09So we don't know why they piss on each other.I think the idea is maybe that it containspheromones or something like that.But it seems like such a blunt instrument to us,because we don't know about whatever pheromones may be in it.So they probably look at us going,oh, these humans, they make noises with their mouthswhen they're happy, when they're sad,
04:26to please people, to make people angry.It's grotesque.Why are they marking that urinal is edible?Going back to Mary Roche, which the book Bonk,which is where you got the fact about rats in pants from.I read it a few years ago, I think it was in the J series.And because you have to tenuously tie everythingto the letter of the alphabet, your study.
04:46Mine was at a J for jiggy brackets, jiggy.Other incredible facts from this book, Bonk.I love this one.In 1851, a gynecologist called James Platt Whitewas expelled from the American Medical Associationfor inviting medical students to observea consenting woman giving birth,because his colleagues were so outraged
05:03by the idea of a male doctor looking at female genitals.I was given birth to in front of a bunch of students.Wait, really?Yeah, it was pretty awesome.Can you remember much about it?Of course I can.Lola talked about how beautiful I was.Oh, and the other two-fifths of the human penis
05:20is hidden beneath the skin.Two-fifths.Two-fifths.It's like an iceberg.Oh, and I think the other thing,which I've mentioned on this podcast before,is about the postage stamp penis test.We'll say it anyway, what is it?
05:30In the 20th century, if someone couldn't get an erection,it was either going to be psychologicalor it was going to be physiological.So to test whether or not it was a purely bodily problemor whether it was all in the mind,they would attach a strip of perforated postage stampsaround the base of the penisand then leave you overnight.
05:45If it was a purely psychological problem,you would have an erection as you sleptand the perforations would tear.Whereas if it was a physiological problem,you wouldn't and you'd wake up still.The worst thing was when you woke upand your penis been sent to basketball.Okay, time for fact number two, Andrew Hunter Murray.
06:07Okay, my fact is that during the First World War,entertainments for the troops includedorganized pillow fights, wheelbarrow racesand wrestling on the backs of mules.Sounds like fun.It does sound like fun, doesn't it?Wrestling on top of a mule,like two men on a top of a mule.
06:22What I think it is,is two men on two different mulestrying to push the other one off,like low-key jousting.But I haven't confirmed that, so you may be right.It may be two men on one mule.But that's a lot to put on one mule.I do know you're not allowed legally to ride a llama.
06:38What do you mean, nobody's allowed to ride a llama?Just in this country?Well, again, you test the limits of my knowledge.Should we have llamas in Britain?We do have llamas in Britain.They're farmed quite a lot,but it's really bad for them to ride them.So they have quite weak backs
06:53and you can load them up with a bit of weight,but really not very much.And when you look at them,they've got these lovely vertical high necksand then quite a dip in their backs.You can easily see that riding themwould be quite bad for them, actually.Their audience rode them everywhere.
07:05They didn't care.Anyway, yes.So these were just the various thingsthat were done to keep morale up among British troopsbecause, obviously, there's a lot of time going onbetween battles.So where did these fights take place?Are they in the front lines, do we think?
07:17Just front trench?I suspect a little bit further back.Yeah, they probably didn't do wheelbarrow racesin No Man's Land, did they?No.Just going over the top with your pillows.So, sorry, just this pillow fight.We only know about it
07:30because these are first-world diaries,which the National Archive have been digitizing.And you can go and see them at Qand you can go and look through them.They have hundreds of thousands of documents.They have a copy of the Doomsday Book there,a replica of it.But, nonetheless, it's very cool.
07:43Wow.Yeah.Very good.Hey, so pillows used to be made of stone.Did they?You wouldn't like to fight with those, would you?No.When was this?
07:52In the 70s?These are thousands of years old.So the very earliest pillows are Mesopotamian.They're about 9,000 years old.And they're made of stoneand they're carved in a half moon shapeso they can support your neck.Some people think that it was just to stop insects
08:04crawling into your nose and mouth as you slept.Okay.On the day he died, Martin Luther King had a pillow fight.Few years before he died, it's recorded in Andrew Young's biography.Andrew Young was a really good friend of hisand the three of them were in the Memphis Lorraine Hotel.And, yep, apparently, Martin Luther Kingand another friend set upon this other guy with pillows
08:22and beat him about.That's a pillow assault.Yeah, it was a pillow assault.Yeah, it was pillow abuse.Japan actually has issued an official pillow for pillow fighting.Oh, they're really into it in Japan, aren't they?Yeah, yeah, there's an annual pillow fight day in Japan.And, you know, if a pillow has a zip,
08:38if a pillow has feathers that you can choke on.Made out of stone.Made out of stone.Like dynamite.You know, there's a lot of painthat can be brought on by a pillow.And the safest pillow you can use for pillow fighting day.Well, because that's no safe.
08:51They've seen them coming, haven't they?Yeah, but what feathers?We're not allowed feathers anymore in a pillow fight.If feathers come out and you choke on a feather, you can die.That's part of the joy of pillow fighting.That's true.There's feathers everywhere.Peter the Great of Russia used a young male orderly stomach as a pillow
09:06when he was traveling.He would fall asleep and he would wake up an hour or two later completely refreshed.Because he sometimes had convulsions,which might have been epileptic convulsions, we're not sure.But when it became a proper convulsion,the only cure was to put him in the company of someone he found relaxing.And so when he married his second wife,it was always her or another young woman.
09:25He would just put his head in her lap,which he would stroke his head.I just like the idea of him going to bed with his wife,saying, night, honey, and laying back on a man at the top of the bed.She has to sleep on the legs as well.The pillow is too hot.I need to turn it over.If we go back to entertainment in the First World War,
09:50because I know this is one of your boss's favorite things, Andy,The Wipers Times.Have you guys ever read The Wipers Times?Who's Andy's boss?Ian Hislop, the other boss.He's not John Lloyd.Andy does his moon lighting at Private Eye.But I think he did a documentary on The Wipers Times, didn't they?
10:05But I just find it amazing.So in 1916, in the trenches,The Wipers Times was the trench newspaper.And it was a satirical newspaper, really funny,like Private Eye or The Daily Mesh.And it happened just because it was when they were in EEPRA,and they just stumbled across a printing press that was lying around.And then they started distributing this newspaper.
10:23It would do things like publish articles,apologizing for when the British shelled their own people.And it was...It's pretty subversive when you read it.You think, how on earth did they get away with printingand distributing this to normal soldiers?Because it's always so delicious.Given that they'd had their letters checked,
10:39and they had to be read all the way through to check,they weren't saying anything negative about the war,but they were allowed to publish this newspaper,which is extremely negative about their experiences in the trenches.It's kind of weird.It's amazing.I have one more really,one of my favorite facts about the First World War.
10:51Okay.They dug a section of trench to help people trainfor life in the trenches in Blackpool.But they also took visitors around.You could pay a penny and visit them.They were called the lose trenchesand be shown around by a soldier who was recuperating,who'd been actually at the front in France or Belgium.
11:07Imagine spending all that time on the front line in World War Iand then being sent to Blackpool.I'm allowed to say that because I'm from Lancashire.The record for the largest pillow fight ever engaged inwas set in Chicago in 2013and involved 3,813 people,but four and a half thousand pillows,which I think is cheating.
11:29So somebody bled too?Yeah, I guess so.Wow.Didn't know it was allowed.Gotta check the old Japanese pillow fighting rules.Just, this is pretty non-sequitur,but about world records.I just really like that thing about the world record custard pie fight.
11:44The record was 253 custard pies thrown in the fight.It would have been 255,but two of the pies were mysteriously eaten.Not that mysterious.Now, that's quite small for a custard pie fight.We could beat that.We could beat that in the QI audience, couldn't we?Yeah.
12:04Don't know how the studio managers are going to feel about that.Okay, time to move on to fact number three,and that is James.Okay, my fact is that the atmosphere on Venus is so hotthat if you took a pizza out of a freezer there,it would cook in three seconds.Wow.Wow.
12:26And would it cook all the way through,or would it burn on the surface and not cook in the middle?Great question.Yeah.I imagine, yeah, there would be a certain rare quality of the inside.Yeah, and singed on the outside.Quite singed, yeah.And this comes from a talk by Neil deGrasse Tyson,
12:44and it was about his book,which was Death by Black Hole and Other Cosmic Quandries.And he says in his book,I think that it would take either seven or nine seconds,but in this article about his talk,someone corrected him and said it would be three seconds.Oh, okay.I'm not sure what the correction was,
13:00I think it might have been to do with the pressure or something.I like when scientists come up with these sort of weird analogies.Yeah, analogy.It is good because someone might say to you,okay, it's 800 degrees Fahrenheit on Venus,but what does that mean to anyone?Yes.It's just a number, isn't it?
13:15Yeah.But also, if it's 800 degrees Fahrenheit on Venus,why are you having pizza?You should have a nice ice cream.Maybe a cool lemonade.Well, yeah.And if you're in a refrigerator as well.Stay in the fridge.
13:26Stay in the fridge.Yeah.Boiling outside.How are you paring this fridge?Okay, there are certain administrative problems here,but nonetheless, that's what would happen.In fact, fridges in the Arctic,the Chukchi, I think, do this,
13:42and probably in Canada, they do it as well.They use refrigerators to keep things warm,because if you have food outside, it will freeze,but if you put it in the refrigeratorwhere it's like three degrees, it'll keep it.Stop it from freezing.Do they call the fridge the oven?No.
13:58I'm speaking of weather on planets.Do you guys know about Planet HD 189733B?Of course.Yeah.So this is a planet that is 63 light years away from us,and it rains glass sideways in 7,000 kilometers per hour windon this planet.I would like to play golf in that.
14:16Do you know, I actually tweeted this a few days ago,and I think someone responded with that exact answer.Yeah, it sounds like a cool place though.So it's got this deep blue hue,which they've worked out as a result of,it's molten glass, so it's silicate in the atmosphere,which is shooting down sideways.Wow.
14:31Have you guys heard about the mysterious light in Venus?No, Daniel.We haven't heard about your mysterious light.The Ashen light, it's called.It's a light that happens on the planetthat scientists have been studying.Have no idea what it is.There's a lot of theories.
14:47No one's decided what it is yet.Herschel saw it.Patrick Moore was a guy called Franz von Gruyzen.I can't pronounce his name properly,but he believed that it was fires from a celebrationof a new Venusian emperor being announced.All these scientists have been looking at it over the years,and we still don't know what it is.
15:03So it's a mystery, and it could be lightning.It's just a patch of light that just comes up,and they have no idea what it is.For a long time, they did think that could be life on Venus.Because it's so covered in clouds,it was really difficult to see with telescopeswhat was going on under there.So it was only when they sent probes down
15:19that they realized, actually,there was no way anything could possibly live down here.When the Soviet Venera program sent probes down there,the longest any of the probes lasted was 127 minutesbefore it was crushed and melted.Really?The surface of Venus is hot enough to melt an aluminium pan.So I don't know what you're serving this pizza on.
15:39You got it.Hey, you want to hear some stuff about pizza?Yeah, go on.Okay, this was a publicity stunt by Pizza Hut in the early 2000s.They claimed that they were the first company in the worldto deliver a pizza to outer spacebecause the company sent one on a Russian rocketto the International Space Station.
15:59And then Yuri Usachev,one of the Russian cosmonauts living there, ate it.And Pizza Hut paid about 700,000 quid for that,so I think we can all agree money was spent.It is now that they've got this kind of promotionfrom the QI podcast before they were wonderingif anything had happened to it.Yeah, but they paid all this money.
16:16And in return, they got to do that.Then they got footage of Mr. Usachev flashing a thumbs upafter eating the pizzaand then for pasting the chain's logo on a rocket last year.Do you guys know about Pizza Hut's proposal package?No.So this cost...Sounds romantic.
16:32It is romantic.Costs $10,010.It was a limited edition offer in 2012and it came with a red ruby ring, a limousine,which took you to your location of choice,flowers, fireworks, a photographer,and the cherry on the icing, a $10 dinner box.What's a $10 dinner box?
16:50It's like a box with a pizza in it, some cheese sticks.Another thing that Pizza Hut has is its own perfumecalled Ode to Pizza Hut.It smells apparently like a freshly opened box of pizza,although a professional smellologist,whatever we're calling them,actually said it smells like cinnamon, baby powder,and most overwhelmingly, feet.
17:09They're not my favorite toppings.Actually, speaking of William,marry me, this is something I looked intofor the last time we were discussing for the Iceland fact.But the first woman who ever placed a personal adin a newspaper was immediately committed to an asylum.What did it say?Did it say,
17:28I'm going to kill everyone.Marry me.No, she was just committed to an asylum by the meds.She placed a personal ad in the Manchester Weekly Journalin 1727.She was called Helen Morrison,and the first person to respond was the mayorwho had her locked up in an asylum for a month
17:43for doing something so completely insane.I don't believe that.When was the last time you were in Manchester?The mean bunch.A few things about weather on planets.The great dark spot on Neptune has winds of 1,500 miles per hour.If there winds anywhere on Earth, for instance,are more than about 120 miles an hour,
18:05it's no longer possible to stay upright,and it's 1,500 miles an hour there, so 10 times more.So you're telling us if you opened an umbrella,you would fly?You would fly.Well, you would certainly be thrown along the floor,if not fly.Awesome.
18:19Also, on Mars, the atmosphere is so thin on Marsthat if you stood at the equator at noon,it would feel like summer at your feetand winter at your head.Wow.Wow.Yeah.Amazing.
18:33So, crouch to eat your pizza,stand up to eat your ice cream dessert,there would be little clouds floating around your midriff.Yeah, but it's very thin, so you wouldn't really see much of it.Would it be like being a giant on Earth?Yeah.Maybe.I'm just trying to get a clear sense
18:48of what it would like to be there.I was looking at weird ways to cook stuff,because, you know, pizza on Venus,a weird way to cook stuff,tips for other weird ways to cook stuff,if your oven's broken,poaching salmon in the dishwasher,apparently works.
19:00I've done that.Does it work?Yeah, it's great.Rapid and tinfoil.Yeah.Cook on top of your car engine,you've got to drive for about an hour in your carfor something to cook properly like an egg,
19:09but the other good way to cook somethingwhen your oven's brokenis to put it in the middle of a compost heap.And so, there's a guy who likes to do this,I was reading his blog,and it gets really hot in the middle of a compost heap.So, in fact, once our compost heap in our gardenset on fire,
19:24it was mental and our gardener came through now.Hot but also composty.Yeah, so maybe, you know,rapid and foil again,but this guy says, I quote,now whenever I hanker for a real breakfast treat,I drop a few eggs in the compost heap in the eveningand look forward to a morning feast.
19:40Are you sure when he says drop a few eggs?Okay, time for the final fact of the show,and that is my fact.And my fact this week is that,in Iceland,there is a phone app that tells youif you're related to the person that you're hitting on.Okay, I don't usually go to frozen food supermarkets
20:01to hit some people,but maybe you do.Okay, the country, Iceland,they've got a really small population over there.It's something like 320,000 people.So many people were accidentally finding out,you know, in the bedroom chat in the morning.So they're like, oh, so what are you up to today?
20:14Oh, go to my mom's barbecue.Oh, I'm going to a barbecue today.Oh, what's up?Oh my god, cousin too.Yeah, that's how it works.It's my grandmother's birthday today.Oh, me too.Me too.
20:26Where do you live?Just in the next bedroom actually.Weird, right?Yeah, so this is a really important appbecause they want to stop the gene poolfrom becoming incestuous.And it's basically in a bar,you both have the app on your phones,
20:40you bump the phones.Their motto is bump phones before you bump in the bed.And the idea is that it then tells youwhether or not you're related.It's very clever.That's great.Isn't the feature,the specific feature in this app is called,
20:51I'm going to mispronounce this,syphia spelspelir,which is called the incest spoiler.Yeah, it's got negative connotations.It implies you're ruining somethingthat could have been otherwise a beautiful experience.Sounds like you wanted incest.Incest spoiler alert.
21:08It's what you would receive on your phone.Incest spoiler alert, yeah.That's so good.But yeah, I just think that's,what I really love most about it,other than like, it's a very interesting app,is the fact that apps are getting to the point nowwhere we've just got so many options of lifestyle choices
21:27via reading a little app that we, you know,my friend knew that she was giving birthbecause her pregnancy contraction app told her,I mean, you figure you keep her phone.You figure you know that anyway.Yeah, I don't know how that works.They're also in Japan at the moment.There's a new app, which, okay, basically,
21:43this sounds really weird,but there's a bra now in Japan that doesn't come offunless you truly love the person that you're talking to,or that you're having a relationship.Kind of like a chastity bra.And the way that it knows that you do like the personis something in the bra that monitors your pulsating heart.Your heart then sends a message to your iPhone
22:05where there is an app that releases the bra,and then it can come off.What about when you go to sleep at the end of the dayand you want to take your bra off?You have to feign being in love.And also, faster heart rate.What if you're being muggedand then your bra comes off?
22:20Those photographs on roller coasterswould be really interesting.Everyone's bra's falling off.So, I wasn't scared.That's not what you're breast is saying.There was an app in Azerbaijan in 2013that would tell you the results of the electionas soon as the results came in.
22:40Unfortunately, anyone who downloaded it got a messagethe day before the polls openedsaying that there was a massive landslidefor the current president.There's a really good one I read about the other daycalled Run P, and it's an app.And the idea behind it is,so you know when you're in the cinema
23:00and you're watching a movieand you really need the toilet,but it's a great movie,and you're going, I have no idea when I need to go.So, the app is you open it up,and you type in the name of the movie that you're watching,and people who've watched the movie beforehave put this into the app.
23:13So, if you're watching Guardians of the Galaxy,it will say one hour, 28 minutes in,you're going to get to a scene that's like this,perfect time to go.It's a boring scene.It's not needed to know the rest of the plot.So, it tells you exactly in every moviewhere you need to go for a peek.
23:26That's good.That's so good.Isn't that a great app?Wow.Okay, incest.Should we talk about incest for a while?Sure, please.So, in Hawaii, they used to revere incest,
23:39and they had a system called Nia Upo'o,whose aim was to keep the royal lineageas clear as possible.And the very top of the society was a kapu,and that was a product of a royal brother and sister.And if you were the son or daughterof a royal brother or sister,you were considered a god.
23:57Partly because you had seven legs.And we're blue.Wow, weird.Yeah.Yeah, so in Russia, China, Ivory Coast,Spain, Portugal, and quite a few other places,it's not illegal to commit incest.But in Korea, it's really illegal.
24:13And actually, you're not allowed to marry anyonewho's related more closely than eighth cousin.Oh, my God.Yeah.Although, obviously, it's difficult to check that.You're not allowed to knowingly do that.But by law, I think you have to checkthat they're not second cousins.
24:29In South Korea, it was decreed in 1308that if you had the same surname as someone else,you couldn't marry them because of this incest taboo.However, a fifth of people in South Koreahave the surname Kim.So there are all these people who might love each othervery much and be very distantly, not related at all,essentially, but legally they weren't allowed to marry.
24:47Well, I think they've changed it now,have they, a little bit?Yeah, they have.In 1997, it was repealed.But before that, every so often,they would just have an amnesty and say,OK, a few 10,000 of you can get married to each other.Interesting, isn't it?
24:58Yeah, that's very interesting.Yeah, it is.I was going to talk about Iceland.Oh, yeah.Does anyone say you're interested in Iceland?I love Iceland.Iceland.Have you been to Iceland?
25:05Go back along.Uh, yes, I have.I always think Iceland is likea geography teacher's best ever thingbecause it's got everything like waterfalls and earthquakesand, you know, tectonic plates and everything, geysers.Yeah.They also believe in elves, which is very exciting.
25:20Oh, yeah.54%, I think, in 1998.Well, yeah, I remember it because I only know thisbecause John Lloyd told me this years ago.He said that 54% believe in it.But if you get them drunk, something like 90%admit that they actually believe in it.Which I really like.
25:39There was quite a good comment from an Icelandic academicwho was saying, you say that it's geographically fascinating,who was saying you can completely believeif you've lived there and grown up there,the earth is so volatile and moving all the timeand wisps of smoke shooting up out of the ground and stuff.It's kind of not surprising that people thinkthere are spirits everywhere.
25:55And there's a really sweet story of a politician,an Icelandic politician a couple of years ago,his car spun off the road and he said that he was savedfrom any injury by elves.And then a short while later,they were going to build over the elf homeand the elves lived in a nearby boulder.And so the politician said, no, you can't do that.
26:13And said, we'll have to move the boulder that the elves live in.So they got someone who speaks to elvesto talk to the elves who are invisible to most people.And they said, okay, you can move our boulder,but we really need to have a view of the seaand it's got to be on grassbecause we like to keep sheep, also invisible sheep.Self facing garden.
26:28Yeah, and they did.Invisible tiny elf size sheep.You know elves are human sizes, Icelandic elves.Are they?Yeah.Oh, I see.They look like people, but they're invisible.Wait, they look like people, but they're invisible.
26:40That is the only difference is that you can't see them.I didn't know they were man size as it were.Should we move on?I was just going to say quickly,because I think I must be one of James's favorite museumsor whichever one of you loves weird museums.Iceland has the phallological museum,and that has as well, which is the penis museum.
26:55Penis museum, say the real.Sorry, sorry.I was not, we mentioned penis is too much.I felt like we should use different words.Two thirds of it's underground.Cool.Well, you say that, but parts of it are invisible,because it claims to have penises,
27:09as well as penises of lots of animals.It claims to have elf penises.Oh, and do elf penises look like human penises?Yeah, but they're invisible.Oh, they're invisible.So it's a huge empty cabinet.I've brought in my collection of elf penises.I'm very disappointed that none of you's mentioned it yet.
27:23I've actually, I'm actually wearing my elf dick coat right now.It's just a coat of penises, but you can't,I wish you could see it.And you, have you had your mouth open this whole podcast?Come on, guys.Get it together.Okay, that's it.That's all our facts.
27:46Thanks so much, everyone, for listening.If you want to get in contact about any of the thingsthat we've been talking about on this week's podcast,you can get us on our Twitter accounts.I'm on at Shriverland.Andy.At Andrew Hunter.Ed.
27:56James.At Egg Shaped.And Anna.You can get me if you email podcast at qi.com.Also, if you head to our SoundCloud page,and you go specifically to the episode timelinethat you're listening to,we often put extra notes up on the timeline.
28:09So if you want to look into any more stuff,probably most likely there'll be stuff up there.So do that, and we will be back again next weekwith another episode of No Such Thing as a Fish.We'll see you then.Goodbye.you
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