No Such Thing As A Fish - 458: No Such Thing As An Edam Tuba

Episode Date: December 23, 2022

Merry Fishmas! Live from the Bloomsbury Theatre, London; Dan, James, Andy and Anna celebrate Christmas with facts about Switzerland, meatballs and Nostradamus; as well as a special nerdy quiz. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.   Join Club Fish for ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus content at nosuchthingasafish.com/apple or nosuchthingasafish.com/patreon

Hi everybody, Alex here. Yes, Alex. I am alive and well and I'm here in the QI office on Christmas Eve Eve. Dan, James and Andy and Anna have all gone home again. Let me here to sort out this year's Christmas episode. In a second you're gonna get Dan and Anna asking you to subscribe to things and buy all their merch but they couldn't even take the time to wish their loyal listeners a merry Christmas because they're all complete f***ing freeloading, self-centered f***ing whole f***ing bastards. So yeah, f*** them. It falls to me to gladly wish all of you out there a very merry Christmas from everyone here at No Such Thing as a Fish and this means that I finally

get to say on with the podcast after these messages. Hi everybody, just before we start this show, we have a couple of small favours to ask you. It's that begging time of year when people put their tins out and shake them around asking for you to do things like, for instance, voting for their favourite podcast in the National Comedy Awards. That's why we have been long listed as one of the best comedy podcasts. We're very excited about and we would love it if you could get us to the short list. To do that you can go to qi.com slash vote. You'll see all the options there. You can also vote for your favourite comedians, your favourite comedy shows. You'll see Sandy Toxfig up there, host of QI. You'll see QI itself.

Why not register a vote for them and you'll see No Such Thing as a Fish. We would massively appreciate a vote. Do it now, qi.com slash vote. That's right and there's stiff competition on there so we really need the Fish Army to come together and give us these votes because it would mean so much to the podcast to make it to the live National Comedy Awards. Outside of that what we would absolutely love is if you could just very quickly just go to the follow button on wherever you're listening to this podcast be it Spotify or Apple iTunes, wherever it is and just press follow. We've discovered that so many people are listening to this show without having pressed that button and it's extraordinary what a difference it makes in helping us to be higher in the charts to get

more exposure, to get more attention, to allow for the podcast to keep going. So simple button press is genuinely going to be a huge deal for us if enough of you do it. So please do. That's our two big bits of begging. Please vote for us in the National Comedy Awards. Please press follow and that will allow us to keep going as a podcast in 2023. Otherwise we just have to shut shop. That's it. If we don't get shortlisted and you don't press follow, we're out of here. Okay, enough begging. This is starting to get desperate and sad. Do it if you want to. Don't do it if you don't. Okay, on with the show. On with the show after you press follow and vote it for us. Okay.

Hello and welcome to another episode of No Such Thing as a Fish, a weekly podcast this week coming to you live from the Bloomsbury Theatre in London. My name is Dan Shriver. I am sitting here with Anna Toshinsky, Andrew Hunter Murray and James Harkin and once again we have gathered around the microphones but not with our four favorite facts this time because this is our Christmas special episode and we have decided to instead use 500 favorite facts from the audience members who are here tonight who have submitted them to us and at the end of the show after reading out some of our favorites we're going to pick two of the best. We're going to bring the two people who said those facts onto stage and we're going to have them

battle in a quiz to the death. So it's a very exciting episode, a special treat. What have we got from the audience here tonight guys? I just want to say the facts are on my phone. I'm not checking the football scars all the way through. I just want to make that clear really early. So shall I do a fact? This is one just that I just picked up now. Some people can grow hair on their tongues. Oh wow. Like a will? Yeah that's what it sounds like. Yeah well I mean would that be a useful superpower to have do you think? A tongue-tongue hair yeah. Warmth, sometimes it gets very cold in the mouth. Yeah. When you eat ice cream too fast. Oh yeah that's a good idea. That's the ice cream headaches. I only say it is because the person who wrote it is a surgeon and I wonder

if you're in. Are you in the person who? Yeah. Yeah okay. Who's that? What's your name? Malcolm. Malcolm. You're a surgeon. Do you operate on hairy tongues? Are you a glorified hairdresser? Here's a weird thing that would possibly happen right. If you had a very hairy tongue and you were say making out with someone and you did some french kissing would it ever be the case that their hairy tongue would wrap around your tongue and then you would get stuck? Does it ever happen that you walk next to someone and your hair wraps around them and you get stuck together? No but you know when you like put Christmas lights back in the box and then they come out next year and they're all tangled up? Oh yeah. And you know sometimes remember I had a friend at school who

had braces and he kissed someone who had braces. No. And they got stuck in their braces. They're still stuck aren't they? No it's not a myth. It sounds like an urban myth. It does sound like an urban myth. Well I saw it. Maybe you're the source of it. I shouldn't have been watching but I saw it. I popped out from the cupboard and went guys I can help. I can help. Can we should we just quickly go back to Malcolm to check whether it's part of your surgery you actually grow people hairy tongues? Reconstruct somebody's tongue after big operation. Yeah and you said in your message so you can reconstruct people's tongues but you said in your message that it might become from your forearm or your thigh and so when it comes in that's

where the hair comes from. I see. Isn't that something like your hair even if you take it away I suppose this is and this will explain why people have hairy tongues even if you take it away from a certain bit of your body it always remembers it was there and grows in accordance with that so I think there are things where like if you get some hair planted onto your head if you want to sort out your baldness for instance then I believe if like the hairs let's say you get it taken from your pubic region or something because that seems to be where I want it. I think that's the most common that people get isn't it? If the hairs that were around it start to fall out then that one will also fall out. So your hair has a thing in it that tells you how long it needs to grow right

because your eyebrows are not the same length as your head hair and your pubic hair is not this what you can't see at home for the podcast is and it has enormous hairs on her eyebrows no and so um yeah it has those and then when you transplant say you put eyebrow hair on your head they would all grow for that amount of time and then stop. Could you transplant all hair as in could you transplant eyelash hair onto your head should you want it? Well we have a surgeon in the audience. Don't ask us. Shall we do some more facts? Yeah let's do another fact. Sorry about that. Maybe the fact that only I and presumably the person who sent this in who's called Jamie Drummond will enjoy and it's that. Why are you reading it? Stop with the stop with the hard sell Anna please.

I think sometimes it's good to have a private bonding moment in these mass experiences. Cool. In Gladiator released in 2000 Russell Crowe had a dog quite ferocious dog. Oh yeah. Played by a dog called Kite who was a Belgian shepherd apparently a Tervuren Belgian shepherd. Anyway she went on to be Wellard in EastEnders. No way. Of course so that's the name of the dog Wellard. Yeah Wellard in EastEnders. Yeah named by Gus I think who was a funny guy which is why he named him Wellard. Great fact. That is a really good fact. Any more? Any more? This is a cool one. This is from Polly or at saying nice stuff. My husband Frank says the electrical cable in this theatre would stretch from here to Grimsby if placed end to end. Yeah why haven't we done that? Yeah. Do you

mean all the different cables because presumably if it's a cable it is end to end already. It's just a cable right. It's not a cable is it all the cables. It says the electrical cable. There's one cable in this place. Wow. I think I feel like cable can be a plural kind of collective noun right. All the cable in a place. You could say that right. Yeah we said that all the time. Another one on places. I've got one which someone sent in saying in Switzerland it's illegal to flush the toilet after 10 p.m. What illegal. Illegal according to this person who apparently lives in Switzerland as so they claim. I remember there was a woman who wanted to get a passport in Switzerland didn't she? Do you remember? And in order to get a passport she needed to get

the permission of all the other people in her village. That's right. And they all hated her. And they all wrote to the government saying no we don't want her in our country and she didn't. I think eventually she got it. Did she? I think so yeah. Yeah they were like she's so annoying. We just don't want her. Yeah that's bad. Thank God we don't have that system here. I'd be homeless. This is quite a cool fact. I think Danny might like this one. It's kind of spooky coincidence. So this was sent in by email from Nick Speechley and it's that in one of his recent rants, Kanye West. I know not a promising opening. We don't love a lot of his work. Claimed that Hitler. I also not promising. I'll give you that. There better be a huge

U-turn coming on this fact. Claimed that Hitler invented the microphone weird. In actual fact the technology that 90% of microphones used today was invented by an African-American man who was called West. That's good. Spooky. Is Kanye trying to plant that in our head somehow? What is he trying to do? Well you think he's going to then say well it's my relative so I'm going to take all the money? Oh maybe. Yeah. Yeah. Are you saying he's a gold digger is what I'm asking? Oh that's one of his songs. Is that a reference to him? Yeah. Is it true? Sorry to move into Hitler. I read years ago, years and years ago that there was a story that whenever Hitler was going to do a speech, the sound system, so this to do with

the microphones as well, the sound system would play a sort of note, a slightly annoying note while everyone was waiting. So it was just one of those notes that you know. Not the one that makes everyone poo. No, not the poo note but like you're a certain age as you can hear certain ones and it's just a little. Like a mosquito tone. Yeah, a mosquito tone and the idea, again don't know if this is true, the idea was that when he came on stage they would turn it off and the sense of relief that you would get when he came on stage played into the sense of ask someone who's going to help us is here. It was just a little psychological thing. Has anyone heard that? I have heard that yeah. But we don't know. From you. I bring it up every episode. Why is it not made it in?

But that's actually what we were doing at the start of this show when and for listeners at home there were a series of maybe two or three dozen technical glitches but it was just to create that sense of relief when we come on. Yeah. I've got a fact for you. Yeah. This is from Steve Early and it's this. I'm just going to read it verbatim. It is possible to make a tuba out of material other than brass and somebody once made one from cheese and it sounded okay. That's pretty good. I remember reading once that I think this is tubas. I might be going completely wrong but I think it's tubas. Basically in America this is all the high schools have all got bands and they all have tuba players but then when you go to like top level bands you only need

one tuba player in a band right and so there's a massive massive like competition for tuba players in America because there's loads of really good ones. Like there might be loads of really good violinists but you can have 10 different violinists in an orchestra right. Yeah. But there's not much use for a tuba. I would have thought it was always proportional. You know in the schools you've got let's say you've got lots of violinists in every school. Yeah. So only a certain percentage of them are going to get through to the... But they can also play in you know string quartets. I see. You don't get very many tuba quartets. Steve can I just ask what kind of cheese it was? I'm guessing it was a fairly hard one. I've got to be a hard one. Yeah yeah yeah. I've got to

fight about cheese actually. This is Swedish cheese called a basta bottensost and apparently when you make it you require a bit of you need to stir it and then leave it and then stir it and then leave it and apparently it was invented in 1872 by a dairy maid called Ulrika Lindström and she kept being distracted by her work to go and have sex with a local boy and she would go away have sex then come back and stir it and then go away have sex come back and then stir it and then when the cheese was made she was like this is delicious. Yeah but she must have been starving after that. Anything would taste good. Just quickly I'm just thinking if it was a edam you could presumably

get one of the holes to go all the way through and then you'd have like a cheese tuba. You think of leodama? No I'm thinking of edam. And a tuba. It definitely has the holes right? Edam's got holes in it right? Oh dear. No. Doesn't. Oh wow. Edmontal I'm getting. Edmontal. Leodama does as well for sure. And leodama yeah. That's probably why no one liked that joke. That'll be the reason. Yeah yeah. Make a good drum an edam wouldn't it? I don't know what an edam is as we as we now well know. I'm slightly struggling to remember what a tuba looks like. What does it look like? Well imagine a big tube. Yeah. Surround it with brass. Yeah. There you go. In fact do you know what you should imagine because I've always really loved this. You know

fallopian tubes if you can picture fallopian tubes. Of course. A common everyday household item for Dan. From diagrams. You can see the shape of them and they get wider at the bottom. Yes. So they were named after the tuba. Oh not tubes. Yeah. I would say more like a paper clip but it's a big musical instrument right. It's got those bending bits and it's got. Yeah. I'm just trying to think of something that Dan might have seen more from the fallopian tubes. I've seen a lot of fallopian tubes James. It is a fun Christmas fact that I got sent. I got sent this this morning. Nothing to do with the show. So at Steve Down Under is not going to realize that he's made it onto our show but he's he's written in from New Zealand. He DM'd me on Twitter and he said Kia ora Dan.

Quick fact for you. You might like to use for fish. Jesus had a disciple named Thomas the Testicle. No. No. No. No. No. No. Happy to elaborate if you're interested. Now I don't want to be a doubting Thomas but I don't think that's true. Why would he say that? What's he saying there? Thomas the Testicle. I don't know what he's saying. Does anyone in the audience have any idea if he might be making some kind of weird reference to an actual fact? No. Was he hitting on me? We'll let you believe that's what it is I suppose. We did actually put a call out for some Christmas facts on Twitter and we got some great ones in. So this is not from people in the audience here but I did particularly like that. So I like

this because I have friends who live in the Netherlands and I refuse to believe they're this deranged but in 2006 people in the Netherlands were banned from adopting rabbits over Christmas because there's a popular festive song about a family cooking their pet and it was believed that all Dutch people who adopted rabbits would just be trying to replicate that song. It's terrible isn't it? And I think around the same time the like the Dutch version of the RSPCA said that everyone who had a rabbit should keep it indoors so that no one would kind of pick it up and try and copy this song. How often do you sing a song and then sort of enact the lyrics as you do it? Yeah I'm always going around bullying reindeer's. Yeah apparently this is a thing and it's really

really popular and if you go to the Netherlands and they play like the top you know 20 Christmas songs of the year they always play this one. Oh we've got to send another Christmas animal slaughter-related fact. I've got to hit it's from Holly T. I think you're in. Hi. This is great I really like this. This is a historical fact it's that in 1797 Tom the Goose was brought with thousands of other geese to the London Hall Market in London to be slaughtered but Tom escaped perusing the market and evading capture for days on end. His life was eventually spared and he was adopted as the market's mascot and he had a bar named after him which is called Old Tom's Bar. The Goose. Do we buy that? I buy it. Yeah I think so and definitely we know that the geese were taken to

town and they were walked all the way to town and stuff like that. They put little boots on them weren't they? Yeah yeah. Well that's what they say they always say oh they put little boots on the geese but actually I think what they happened was they would dip the feet in like tars. I think they'd walk them through a big tarte. Yeah yeah yeah it's not quite as nice but that definitely did happen. That did happen. And they did used to always go rampaging the animals around Smithfield and stuff so yeah. Okay so yes. I think more plausible than Thomas the Testicle if that's the hierarchy. Of the Tom's yes. Yeah yeah. This is a cool one we got sent by at Flamie's who I think is in here tonight. Diego are you in here tonight? Diego's here. Google engineers in California had

no clue about the Football World Cup and were alerted to it when traffic dropped suddenly for more than half an hour then suddenly spiked and went back down again. Nowadays most tech companies have a dedicated sports event calendar as a result. It's just pretty cool how much it sort of influences the world. Yeah except no one in this room who have continued with your ordinary lives despite the football match being on and we respect you for it. Yeah here's one in 1834 we also had three Prime Ministers in a year so we did this year. Lord Melbourne was the Prime Minister he was sacked by the King and Sir Robert Peel was chosen but Sir Robert Peel was on holiday in Italy at the time so they sent someone out to find him and while they were trying to find him the Duke

of Wellington was an interim PM. That's good fact isn't it? I love the idea of her to just find the PM. Well they just struggled with Boris wasn't they? Check the fridge. There was another fact about oh I think it was Lord Liverpool who was the fifth Tory Prime Minister in a row and was at the kind of late end of a you know an administration and and wasn't seen as being very good at the job was really young as well was in his early 40s when he got the job and he was in charge of 25 years. Yeah are we sure there wasn't a Thomas the Testicle because I feel like that would be of all the disciples the one you'd want at the last supper right? Like he's a party disciple! Bring the party disciple Thomas the Testicle! I thought you meant as a kind of dim sum option. I've got another fact

on bowls yeah someone sent this in my interesting fact is that frozen meatballs that go in pasta ready meals set off metal detectors now can you guess let's see if you can guess why that might happen. Frozen meatballs set off metal detectors. They've got metal in them. Oh it's a reasonable thought yeah but no. Because you wrap them in aluminium. No no more surprising than that. More surprising. Is it to do with them being frozen the freezing process? Why close whose whose fact is that? Jack. Jack can you explain why? Because that's quite an approach and they're so dense. The metal detector is actually looking for metal. It looks like they're really dense on there. Oh I didn't know that so metal detectors don't

detect metal specifically they detect the density of the object. Yeah and the meatballs are really dense. That's why Dan sets it off whenever he goes through. When I go home and my wife says how was the gig? It's great the room clapped for me at one point. It's so great. Here's one this is from I think I think you're in the room. Samuel Wilkinson hello uh so uh Sam Wilkinson says only five people on the planet know the formula for angostura bitters and they have made a pact to never fly on a plane together or even to eat in the same restaurant. That's a really good excuse if you've got people who you don't like isn't it? Yeah. Just give them something and you're like oh we can't go for dinner together I'm sorry. Yeah yeah. I was always

told when I was a barman I don't know if this is true because I never looked it up that angostura bitters is technically poisonous. It's a poison and that's why they always said you're only allowed to use a tiny little bit. I don't know if that's true. I mean everything's poisonous in large enough quantities isn't it? Yeah. Such a clever dick thing to say. Well I got really worried recently because my husband made a meal for me and it tasted quite strongly of a specific spice. I was like god why is that you put lots of it in? He said oh I just put loads of nutmeg in it and I I know and I got suddenly quite nervous because you know nutmeg is actually banned in a couple of countries because it is in certain quantities poisonous and surprisingly small quantities like if you had two

tablespoons of nutmeg I think you'd be in trouble. Really? Yeah um and then I actually don't think I've admitted this to him so maybe don't tell him but I wanted him to feel okay so I said no I'm sure it's fine how much did you put in and he showed me and then I actually threw up because I thought I'm not fucking dying if this guy wants to die if not make poisoning he's good he can go but I've got a long life to live. Oh my god. But you thought it was worth saving yourself. Well I didn't want him to think I was paranoid. Yeah you certainly haven't come across as paranoid in this story and then did you just watch him and see if see if he died? I was I watched him like an absolute hawk yeah and he passed on that. Yeah. Is it legal these days

to have a massive company and have all the ingredients on the back but then go but there's a secret something we're not telling you? I don't know. Can you legally do that these days? But they all do don't they like KFC and Coca Cola? We've got allergies we have like people have things. I think if you had peanuts in there they'd make you put that on. Yeah. Well I don't get why they're not allowed to go to the same restaurant because in case it's poisoned. Well if all five of them die in the restaurant. I see yeah but in case there's a poisoned chef in the restaurant. Yeah okay. Anna's husband working. Welcome to Nutmeg Mix. There's a few things at those right where people aren't allowed to travel in the same plane or whatever. I can only think of the

Wright brothers because they weren't allowed to fly in the same plane for years. The royal family as well there were certain things about that's been said. I read and again don't know because we're just flying off with retain that so it's possible this is true that people who made the parachutes for NASA for the for the rockets that come back in so Apollo 13 when the parachutes came out the people who know how to make the parachutes there's only like three people who know how to make the coffee right. Three people who know how to make their parachutes. Yeah there's a secret ingredient. It's the ropes. Just on the royal family by the way because we just quickly mentioned them. When he was child and the nanny told him to do something that he didn't want to do apparently

Prince William used to say when I'm king I will have you punished. This is a cool one from Charlie Brook in the 1960s a British scientist began an investigation into whether there were people who could see the future. The project ended in 1968 when two of his subjects accurately predicted his death. And this and this really this really happened and this is so as Charlie Brook says this is from a book called the Premonitions Bureau which is a new book that came out this year by Sam Knight and it was about a guy in London who following a very tragic accident where a school was taken out by a landslide and there was a lot of deaths. A few people said that they had accurately predicted that this would happen. There's even a few school children from the school

that had drawn these quite ominous drawings ahead of it and so he thought what if this is the case a premonition was a real thing. What if we had a bureau in London that was able to accurately gather together all these predictions so that we could see if there was going to be a big train crash in the future or fire somewhere we would be able to stop it before it happened. And they predicted his death. They both independently said did they kill him? I haven't got to the end of the book. I went to Nostradamus's house this year. I knew you were going to do that. That was great. What was your favourite thing? Oh it was a plaque that's it. That's it. What was the plaque? Is plaque said that he'd lived there or was it like in Kodor? It said he'd lived there and it

talked a bit about the stuff he predicted which I don't think it's going to be true. They hired you to work for their tourism outreach programme didn't they? Can I quickly say my favourite Nostradamus fact and it's not a fact obviously but when so when he died he was buried and there was all these rumours swirling around that if you wanted to inherit the powers of Nostradamus you had to get his skull and you had to drink through his skull and so he died and then in 1791 which is I think maybe even 100 years after he died May of 1791 these grave diggers locate his grave and they dig him up and they open it and there laying in the grave is Nostradamus but around his neck and on his chest is a little board on which it's written May 1791 as if he went I knew you'd

be here. That's good pranking. Yeah yeah and it's not true. I think this is really interesting I can't believe I didn't know it if it's true this was sent in by Willow Ray Culpepper so in Pennsylvania there's you've got the Amish community you know they got called Pennsylvania and Dutch do you guys know why they're called Pennsylvania and Dutch? I thought they originated in the Netherlands. Apparently they were German settlers but they introduced themselves to the English and what do they introduce themselves as? Deutsch and the English one sounds like you're probably Dutch and that's stuck ever since. That's great. Okay well look I think we've got our we've got a good pool of facts to pick from here for going

into our fact-off for the nerdiest person in the room so James and I are going to be deciding who are the two finalists and whoever we pick is going to be on our team so we're going to ask you to come up on stage and sit next to each of us and we'll do this quiz along next to you and so James do you want to pick first? Yeah I'm thinking that maybe to psych you out we should go for the meatballs guy because it felt like you really lost it around that time and I think by bringing him up on this side of the stage that's going to really... Okay all right meatballs guy and I will go for the lady who hasn't flushed her toilets since 10 p.m to 6 a.m in the mornings every single night so while you're making your way down and making your way to front of the stage

we are going to find out the rules of the quiz how it's going to be played how we're going to determine the winner so here to introduce it all is our quiz master herself Anna Tushinsky everybody Yes so the way this is going to work as we alluded to earlier is we will be quizzing our two contenders Jack and Gaia and we're going to be quizzing them on how well they know the no such thing as a fish crew so come on to stage Jack you're on James's team I'm sorry about that but if you take a seat there it's the winning team Jack don't worry and I just want to introduce you also to my little scoring boy over here on the left Andrew the red nose reindeer hi Gaia you're on Dan's team so what I'm going to do is I'm going to read out some questions and you're going to

have to tell me which member of no such thing as a fish is the answer to those questions can you stop distracting your contestant please um okay without further ado let's start the quiz so question number one who once lost a quiz by saying one of the seven dwarves was called Bernard please choose quite speedily Gaia you've gone for Andy Jack you've gone for Dan the correct answer is Dan Treiber get in there come on of course it was me what the fuck are you doing I'm an idiot she thinks too much of you oh actually that's very that's very kind of you oh thank you okay okay question number two so sorry scoring boy uh what is the score one no thank you for your invaluable contribution to the game question number two who was given birth

to in front of live observing students and you guys have gone for James you jack have gone for me Anna the correct answer is me brilliant Jack amazing very strong work you just knew it okay scoring boy what have we got two no wait sorry why were people watching you when you were born uh they asked my mom halfway through labor if she minded uh if excuse me uh was that Anna to it's about to be uh no they said do you mind is an educational process if people can watch your child being born and she said go for your life and so they asked about 20 people into the room gosh wow are they still in contact with the earth um yeah uh yeah yeah she has them round every time every every Saturday every time you come back every time I squeeze myself through a very small

window the cat flap okay so question number three and jack if you get this right and you get this wrong then jack's taking it who owns a light up ear spoon who owns a light up ear spoon you've both gone for James Harkin and the answer is James Harkin yes yes gaya what's our score then whoo three one three one well done you could call it back now yeah um but not if jack gets this one right so who played Joseph in the nativity play alongside their brother who played a blade of grass you've both gone with Andy and I'm afraid that's not right no I'm afraid it was me it's not me this guy James and he will be absolutely delighted we're bringing it up for this podcast okay no change no change there we go still on three one

and so final oh hang on let's do the final question anyway we'll do the five sorry that's been an underwhelming announcement to say that jack's won this um very very hard to come back from at this point but it's possible it's possible we can do this we can do this gaya according to dan's brain you can do this and I believe in you so double points who once had who once had a brilliant self-described idea for a cheese chessboard uh you've gone for dan you've gone for James so just to say this is double points right oh we're actually giving guy a chance wow well you're both wrong I know the answer yeah yeah yeah uh I'm afraid it was Andrew Hunter Murray guys it's obviously my idea come on the cheeseboard but cheeseboard is already a thing but every piece is a different

cheese as we've learned you know so much about cheese well I I had an idea for a t-shirt where you have a chessboard on the front right and it's called chest right so you have little velcro bits right and then check this out check this out on the back what have you got backgammon monopoli oh backgammon way better way better that's why that didn't work monopoly is too complicated so guy I'm so sorry you're the second nerdiest person in the room but I'm gonna have to ush you offstage now uh but jack if you want to take center stage here and I'm gonna hand you over to Andrew Hunter Murray jack well you have done it you did it with your facts get ready to take your prize jack ladies and gentlemen give it up for jack the nerdiest person in the room

okay that's it that is all of our facts thank you so much for listening to this episode if you'd like to get in contact with any of us about the things that we've said on this podcast we can be found on our twitter account I'm on at Shriverland Gaia hey it's Gaia jack that's a monkey two seven three eight are you a bot jack you're the nicest bot I've ever met Andy uh at Andrew Hunter M and James at James Harkin uh Anna you can email podcast at qi.com yeah or you can go to our group account which is at no such thing or our website no such thing is afish.com all of our previous episodes are there thank you for tuning in to our Christmas

episode we'll see you again goodbye