No Such Thing As A Fish - 492: No Such Thing As York Minster Crisps

Episode Date: August 17, 2023

Dan, James, Andrew and Richard Osman discuss heinous errors, outrageous lies, endemic theft and delicious maize-based snacks. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.  Join Club Fish for ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus content at apple.co/nosuchthingasafish or nosuchthingasafish.com/patreon

Hi everybody, Andy here. Just before we started this week's show, wanted to introduce our very special guest who was live at the Soho Theatre with us a couple of weeks ago when we recorded this, he is none other than the mighty Richard Osmond. You might know him from pointless, you might know him from Richard Osmond's House of Games, his appearances on QI, his appearances on every other brilliant British comedy panel show ever made, and he is also the author of a series of books called The Thursday Murder Club. And if you have read a book in the last few years,

there is a pretty good chance that it was one of the Thursday Murder Club novels because they are absolutely titanic. They have broken so many records they have sold millions of copies. The first three in a series are called The Thursday Murder Club, the man who died twice and the bullet that missed. They're about a gang of retired sleuths who live in a retirement village in Kent.

They like going through casenotes of old murders and then they find crime start happening a little closer to home. They're honestly such good books. They manage to pull off the trick of being simultaneously gripping and thrilling at their page shunners. You have to keep reading, you have to find out what comes next, and also being heartwarming and joyful and very human are the characters of beautifully drawn. There is a reason they have sold so many millions of copies around the world, and that's because they're really good. We're all

huge fans of them, and the next in the series is called The Last Devil to Die. Very exciting title and it is out soon. It's out on the 14th of September. It is available to pre-order now from wherever you get your books. It is a safe bet that anywhere that sells books will be selling The Last Devil to die and they will have lots of copies. So that's it. We just wanted to say we're super excited to have Richard on. We've been trying to get him for years and finally he's free So we really hope you enjoyed this show. We had a blast recording it. We hope you like it too. Oh, with the podcast Hello and welcome to another episode of No Such Thing as a Fish, a weekly podcast. This week, Come to You Live from the Sohawk Island. My name is Dan Schreiber. I am sitting here with James Horken,

Andrew Hunter Murray, and Richard Osman. And once again, we have gathered around the microphones with our four favorite facts from the last seven days. And in no particular order, here we go. Starting with fact number one, and that is Richard. Tombridge Wells does not have a weight rose. LAUGHTER For anyone who's not from England, I should explain. Weight rose is a very high-end supermarket,

and Tumberidge Wells is a sort of town you would be absolutely fucking insane to think didn't have one. Yeah. And when you write a novel, there's a wonderful group of people called copy editors, and they're the greatest people in the whole world. And copy editors pick up on every single little thing in a book.

I wrote in one of my books that Joyce Hughes, the head of the Thursday Murder Club, or one of them. She gets a drink from a trolley on a train from Pole Gate to Victoria, and the copy editor says, they stop troddy service on that route in 2008. So just to give you an idea of how good they can be, they pick up on every single thing ever. The one thing they didn't pick up on, I sent someone to waitro's in Tumberidge Wells,

and nobody even bothered to check because why would you? And now, people of Tombridge Wells are furious with me. That's incredible. I reckon it's like a dirty secret of the people in Tombridge Wells that they don't have away trolls, right? Well, no, because Richards told them they do,

so it's kind of, hey, it's... No, but I think Richard Picked a really sore subject for them. So I started looking into this. Yeah. There has been a sort of decade-long campaign in Tumberidge Wells to get a weight troze. And for whatever corporate reasons,

maybe they're just doing it for the fun. Weight troze keeps saying, I'm so sorry, we just can't find a space. We just can't find a site. Like 2016, this story ran. Shoppers in Tumberidge Wells are fuming after a new store to open in the town was revealed to be a will co. Oh!

Oh, imagine they put up the W and everyone's like, Oh! Oh! It's tight and they get their f- because Tombridge just stands around it. Yeah, just a few miles away. They've got to wait tros. They've only got 8,000 people.

Tombridge Wells, as we all know, has 56,000 people. I'm so good. Weirdly, my wife's family lived down in Heathfield. That is weird. And I get the chat. Whoa! That was, you never mentioned that before. Nine years. Nine years.

I've been sitting on that. I thought Richard's brought the wait tros to the top of the world's facts. And so I's brought the waitress Tumberidge Wells fact. So I get off at Paulgate all the time. No. And I know there's no trolley service. So hold on. Right.

Two questions. Yeah. Are you my fact checker? Why didn't you pick up on the Tumberidge Wells thing when you were my fact checker? I think if Dan was your fact checker, you would know about it by now. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This book is much longer than when I sent it in. LAUGHTER But also, my three songs were born in Tumberidge Wells. So I'm really rooted there as a kind of... Oh, yeah, my history now is... Did you pop down to the Wilco to buy a celebratory? I did, yeah, yeah. Well, we did a gig in Tumberidge Wells,

and I got to meet the daughter of a barber shop guy. He's passed away. He ran a salon there, and he was the seventh son of a seventh son, which means he's a wizard. And he had the Guinness World Record for shaving most faces in the shortest space of time. He did like 100 faces in something like 10 minutes. They just came, do you remember?

He was a military guy, and he just went, and he kept... C'mon in blood. It was a very memorable. And weirdly, the next day... 60 deaths. The local morgue broke the record. Yeah. Yeah. I think another name for a barber shop guy is barber.

LAUGHTER I was confused where that's a barber shop guy. I was thinking, oh... And both my parents are hairdressers. I don't know why. LAUGHTER That came out like that. I was thinking, is he the baritone? Yeah.

LAUGHTER I did in the... in the baritone? Yeah. I did in the most recent book that I bought out. I sort of did an apology of sorts. Joyce who writes a diary through the books, she goes to Tumberidge Wells. And she said, I had read somewhere. There was a weight troze, but there isn't. So whoever wrote that had got it wrong.

Oh, wow. And that's my apology to the people of Tumberidge Wells. I have a little quiz for you, Richard. OK. How many times do you mention weight rows in the Thursday murder club? Oh. Just in the first book. Yeah, in the first book. I mean, is it over 100 or over 100?

I'm going to say I mention weight row. The word weight rows. Yeah. Eight times. Five times. OK. Ooh, OK. Sainsbury's? Oh, OK. Three times. Twice. OK. Saints brews? Oh, OK. Three times?

Twice. OK. Starbucks. Starbucks. I think they definitely go to a Starbucks in an airport at 1.0. And they go to, there's a lot of Starbucks. I'm going to say four times.

Three. Then are we going to go through all the words? So just a simple answer. I've only got Tesco, Azda, Little, Acosta, and Aldi to go through all the words? Yes, it's a simple one. Yes. I've only got Tesco, Asda, Little, Acosta, and Aldi to go through. I mean, I do need people to buy these books. That's the... There's murders as well. It's not all just shops.

I'm just saying for the next book, if you need the fact-checker, I kind of know all the shops you mentioned. That's very kind of my daughter who speaks Chinese was reading the Chinese version of the book. And literally the footnotes are longer than the actual book itself. So you said even in the first three pages, they'd had a footnote explaining what Oliver bonus was who Mark Duggan was and what Lilt is.

Or Clay Swartongwen. So if you need somebody who speak Chinese to fact check that, I am also available. I mean, we're going to have to take your word for that. I definitely did speak Chinese just then. And I would have been if you'd be fucking out there if I did. What a way to get cancelled. I feel like I need to help the non-English listener

about these supermarkets in the UK. So a little bit of information. I read that there was some research done by the sex education show, which was a channel for a classic. And they looked at people who went to different supermarkets and they found that people who shop at Marx and Spence's are big fans of sex parties. They do such big cakes, don't they?

Is that Colin Cattabitter in your pocket? I should say it's double the national average, which presumably isn't that high in the first place. People who like sex parties. People who go to Iceland are more likely to be involved in cosplay. People who go to wait-trows are more likely to use nipple clumps. Whoa. So just a little bit of context for the...

And people who go to Liddle, like at the middle aisle. That's what they have. LAUGHTER You never know what you're going to find in there, do you? You never know what you're going to find. Hey bad deal. You never know what you're going to find. Yeah. Hey, baby, I've come back with a kayak. Yeah.

So mistakes in books, there were some which are, you know, you get your typos, you get your small factual ones. I think my favorite one that I found out was there was the Bridget Jones book, the Return of Bridget Jones, after a long, long gap for the third book, it was called Mad About the Boy. And there was a bit of a typo in Jones book, the return of Bridget Jones after a long, long gap for the third book was called Mad About the Boy. And there was a bit of a typo in that book because readers, when they bought it, suddenly started reporting back to the shops

that about a quarter to halfway through the book, there were suddenly 40 whole pages of David Jason from Only Fools and Horses, order biography in there. Wow. Just 40 pages of him talking about his uncle Albert and... And was that... Helen Fielding just absolutely phoning it in and thinking...

No, it was going to get his... What a bridge it just reads, someone else's book for 40 pages. What a great idea! This is called it Mad About the Delboy, no one will notice. Was just a printing cook-up. Yeah, it was, yeah, so they had to return and pull up and all that sort of stuff. There was a thing, this is maybe the north's nightmare, something that happened to Jonathan Franzon, the big American

Oh, yes. He was recording a reading for Newsnight of his book Freedom, which was absolutely massive. It was a mega-book. And he stopped halfway through the reading. And he said, I'm sorry, I'm realizing to my horror here that there's a mistake here that was corrected early and they printed the wrong version of the reading. And he said, I'm sorry, I'm realizing to my horror here that there's a mistake here that was corrected early and they printed the wrong version of the book. They printed

the early file of book and it was obviously, you know, full of all the bits he didn't want to be read and you know, just sounds like. It was an British version and this was like called the book of the century. He'd been working 10 years on it. It was a massive book and they'd published like something like 80,000 copies. Wasn't this previous book called The Corrections? Yes. LAUGHTER Oh, that's a nightmare. You wake up in a cold sweat when you've handed a book in, thinking, just a little things like about, could he've got there on Tuesday if he was there on Friday?

You just think you've missed something. Because by the time it gets printed, maybe ten people have read it, maybe 12 or something like that. So it's not many. So if we all miss the same thing, that's it, you could get this book when everyone just goes, why did you not notice that the, yeah, I think, oh my god, it literally, yeah, I've got a book coming out really soon.

So you're terrifying. Remember when our first book was just going to the printers, you literally rang our producer. I had a lucid dream the night before the book went to print. Bullshit, you never had a lucid So I honestly I was really sweating we did a book where it was called the book of the year and in it We made references to all all over the book So you would say see this article and you would to it. And the introduction was full of these things. So I was having a dream, and this was, I was down in Tumberidge Wells, so I just got the polegate train.

I mean, I was in, sorry, and he filled, yeah, yeah. So my in-laws picked me up from polegate. I'm starving, because the trolley service is going. So I'm, so if I go to the Heathfield Coste, anyway. So in the dream, I'm, and this is true, I'm showing Frank Skinner our book, and I'm saying, look, Frank, this is how the intro is and all these words. And I read in the book a reference to something that I knew was not in the book, and then I kept reading.

And this is, I'm now awake in the book, reading the book, going, that's not in there as well, that's not in there as well. I wake up and I grab a PDF of the book and it turns out I'm completely right. We forgot to change the new articles. And I managed to get through to Nigel, our editor, in the morning, and he stopped it from going to print, had to be printed within the next two hours,

and he sent a new PDF. And I managed to change it the last second, yeah. I lose a dream with Frank Skinner. One of the world's great heroes, my friend. Yeah. Can you imagine what would have happened to us as a nation? Wow. Things could have been really going to shit now.

Yeah. I was reading about some errors in rap songs. So this is... Rap songs that could have done with a fact check. I'm right. Remove some of the more choice words from these, but there's a song by Common Featuring Cannibus. LAUGHTER

And they said, I'm your worst nightmare squared. That's double for those who ain't mathematically aware. LAUGHTER Although, if your worst nightmare is two, That's double for those who ain't mathematically aware. Although, if your worst nightmare is two, then... There's a song by Drake, who says, I could wrap around those others like a cobra snake, a cobra's a venomous, they're not constrictors. Oh!

And Major Lazer said, make yourself bigger like Mushroom, Mario Kart. He's referring to Super Mario, not Mario Kart, where they make you go faster. And Nelly once wrote, I'm a sucker for cornrows and manicure toes, and he meant pedicures. LAUGHTER

Oh, wow. APPLAUSE Conrose and Manacure Toes and he meant pedacures. LAUGHTER APPLAUSE That's nice. Amazing. I hope we have beef with all of them now, when this goes out. Come at me, Major Laser, whoever the fuck you are. LAUGHTER Let's see, the very first thing I ever had published in my life

had a typo in it. I was like 15 years old and had a typo in it. I was like 15 years old, and there was a magazine in Brighton called The Punter. And at one point, they said, oh, we want some of the right, just a little small thing about some of the towns outside Brighton. And I lived in a place called Heywaseeth.

So I said, oh, do Heywaseeth and Burgess Hill. I said, I do both of them because I think it was 7 pound each. So I wasn't just going to do one of them. So I wrote this thing, and it came out. It's the first time my name's ever been in print, first thing I ever saw. And it said at one point, Burgess Hill is like,

hey, was he with anemia, right? Am I my red that she went, that's pretty good. I went, yeah, it's not bad, is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Burgess Hill's like, hey, was he for the anemia? And one of my teachers he lived in, probably I didn't say that.

I read your thing, Burgess Hill is like, hey, was he with anemia. He said, that's pretty good. That's not bad. I go, listen, just stuff comes into my head. What I'd actually written was, Burgess Hill is like, he was seep with a cinema. LAUGHTER

LAUGHTER LAUGHTER Which is factually correct. LAUGHTER MUSIC Stop the podcast! Stop the podcast! Have you won't we'd like to let you know that this week we are sponsored by Squarespace? Yes, Squarespace.

You know it. It's that all-in-one website platform where you can start to build your entire world in one single web page, be it a business, a band that you're in, you're promoting a movie that you've made, or you just want to put up a bunch of blogs and photos about your life. Squarespace is a place to bring it all together and make it look incredible.

Absolutely, they have all sorts of amazing things on Squarespace. They have a fluid engine. Oh, you love this fluid engine. Oh, I can't get enough of fluid engines. I gotta say, it is a website design system that Squarespace uses, which just makes it so, so easy to use. They also have a way of making custom merch.

I love a bit of merch. I know you do as well, Dan. And they have an online store where you can sell, said merch, thanks to said fluid engine. So, if you like what James just said, You can sell, said merch, thanks to said fluid engine. on forward slash fish, and when you do that, you'll get 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Okay, on with the podcast. On with the show. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪

It is time for fact number two, and that is Andy. My fact is that after successful amnesty is on knives and guns in 2016, a Scottish council offered an amnesty on Zimmaphrames. Oh! And this is something you get happens all the time that they have these amnesties, because everyone's got old Zimmaphrames in their house

or are walking sticks. Everyone. What? Back check. Have a look. Yeah. Well, no, you're right. But a lot of money is tied up hundreds of thousands of pounds in walking sticks that are given out or zymophrains and then like you injure yourself, they give you on after a little while you get better, you don't need any more use it as a clothes toss. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. They reckon there's something like 160,000 pieces of equipment that are needing to come back, that haven't come back. Yeah. Yeah. So they had this amnesty, and they got lots handed back in. Crutches, too. Walking sticks, walking sticks. You can amnesty. And amnesty is one of those things to say,

look, if you deliver your knife or gun, you will not be prosecuted. We will send you to prison. If you deliver a Zimma frame, like two years later, said, I'm so sorry. We found this in my mother's house, and we've tracked you down. We've realized this is where it's come from.

You're not going to get a prison. Yeah. They actually... Oh, they do get a lot of people. A lot of people. They've probably banged up. Oh, rightly, if you look in it that way. I think so. Yeah.

No, you're right. It was, yeah, yeah. Amnesty was a kind of sexing up way of putting it, but, yeah. They were all punishments. Yeah, they had a load of them in the 80s and 90s, I was reading them he was a kind of sexing up way of putting it, but yeah. They were all punishments. Yeah, they had a load of them in the 80s and 90s, I was reading them in the newspaper archives. In whole, they said that people are using them to hand clothes on,

like I said, and that's why they all got missing. In the world, they said people are using them to grow climbing plants. Taube made a special Zimmerframe bin, so you could return them anonymously if you were a bit worried about handing them in that you might get big. Yeah, big. I was really waiting for you to say, and in Tombridge, they used them for their sex parties. Well, I got one link with Tombridge Wells slightly, and that is that the stair lift was invented in Tombridge Wells. What is it? Get away. Yeah.

Like, so... Wow. It's the naval of the universe. Yes, so they... I mean, they have been old ones. I think Henry VIII might have had one, but that was just sort of like... Yeah, a stair lift. Oh, yes. Yeah, it was called up by people. Because he was so big at the end of his life,

he couldn't get up the stairs. But this is an invalid chair with tramway for use on staircases that was patented in 1931 in Royal Tumberidge Wellsburg, I call Walter Muffet. OK. And the only other thing I could find about him is that he was once the oldest St John's ambulance member in the world. Wow.

That's really good. That's very cool. I wasn't going to get out my stairlift fact right at the beginning of this fact, because it's incredibly boring, my one. LAUGHTER Do it, do it. Do it, do it. Do it, do it. OK.

It's so shit. I got to say, Andy. Oh, no, because we have a discord for people who are members of Club Fish, who are subscribers. Yeah. And they have a big conversation about the most boring fact you've ever said on fish. Yeah. This fact is going to shove the others aside

for the podium. I swear. Right. The 500,000th Stanisth Stairlift ever made was a produced in part by Prince Charles, who pressed the button to start the presenter. Oh. And he... I told you it was bad. Then he said, I'm someone who is a great admirer of family companies,

particularly hereditary lift makers. LAUGHTER Anyway, I started telling my wife this fact, and she said, literally, wait, think to yourself, is this interesting? Think about it. LAUGHTER That could literally be the title of the podcast. I literally wait, think to yourself, is this interesting? Think about it. LAUGHTER That could literally be the title of the podcast.

LAUGHTER LAUGHTER Have you ever got anything better than that? Oh, man. I've got something worse than that. I think I was looking when I saw you talking about Zimmer frames, I'm always fascinated about who Zimmer might have been because when you look inside companies, it's interesting.

And I assumed he was German, he's not his American, and he's called Justin Zimmer. And it was sort of post-war, I think, that he set up this company. It's one of the biggest companies in the world now. This company that he set up. So I was googling him, but unfortunately, there's also a defensive linebacker for the Miami Dolphins called Justin Zimmer.

So I literally gave up, because everything was about him. So I can tell you that Justin Zimmer, the linebacker, is now a free agent. He is now available because... Oh! ..that Miami Dolphins cut him in pre-season. So he's 30. He's 30. But, you know, still, I think he's got something in his legs. He's got time. Yeah.

He just in the ozimmer of Warsaw and the other... ..he also invented the aluminium splint for broken arms. The advantage of that was the old ones were like Papier Mache and the new ones just covered part of your arms. You could put it in an X-ray machine and you could still X-ray your arm. Your broken arm without taking the cast off. So that was a good thing to come.

That's very cool. I prepared little quiz, game quiz for you. Oh, great. Let's do it. Play your canes right. Yep. That's good. What about Richard Osman's House of Canes? Yeah. There you go. That would have been a lot better, Andy.

That would have been, yeah. All right. Not getting invited back on that show. No. Right, I'll give you a cane, and you have to tell me if it's worth more or less than the previous celebrity-owned cane. OK, cool. Oscar Wilde. Oh, sorry. I haven't told you.

I'm going to say higher. Is it higher? It's harder than it looks, isn't it, Richard? Yeah, higher than zero. High, right? All right, Richard's off the blocks early. Yeah, Oscar Wilde, with Inquil, interesting, is walking stick a little Inquil, built into the top. Oh, that's nice.

That's cool. 7,700 quid. Roughly. OK. So James Craig, who was, of course, the first Prime Minister of Northern Ireland. OK. I've been last, obviously. I'm going to go more. It's more.

No. Sir James Craig's walking stick was sold for 10,000 pounds. It was full of cocaine. It was full of cocaine. LAUGHTER Like Oscar Wilde's cane was sold for 7,000. Yes. No.

Yeah. What year? Like the 1800s? No, recently. This century. I don't think people have... I think they like his writing. Yeah. I'm not sure the cane is the thing there. He had an equal... Two more, like...

Oscar Wilde would have done... He had an equal. That's a historical artifact. What? Michael Collins. The space... the astronaut. I doubt it. The Irish Republican leader. I'm sorry, it's an Irish themed play your cane's right. Yeah, yeah. Right. Wow.

More or less than 10,000 pounds for Sir James Craig. More. I'm going to say more. Yeah, it must be more. It is more. It's fair. See, again, that's a format problem, because we all gave the same answer, didn't we? It's more. See, again, that's a format problem because... LAUGHTER ..we all gave the same answer, didn't we? It's more. It's £52,000. Last one. Whoa! Yeah, a lot!

Oscar Wilde must be gutted. LAUGHTER Um, Labour leader Michael Foote. Oh. Oh, not Irish. Oscar Wilde, can I just say, Oscar Wilde always had a cane. Stephen Fry the poster, he had a cane. I'm sorry. This is a... Historically important cane. Richard, if poster, he had a cane. I'm sorry, this is a historically important cane. Richard, if you want to get Dan angry at any point,

just tell him that an item of very recognised celebrity memorabilia sold for less than Dan would have paid for it. Wow. Like, he has steam coming out of his ears. Me and my friends just equally, like we've put in together, paid a lot of money for Edmund Hillary's.

Backpack, he's the one who got to the top of Everest first, but for his second expedition, when he looked for the Yeti, and we bought it, and no one else bid. But... Wow. Wow. When you went straight in there at 50 grand, did you? How much do you pay for it? New Zealand dollars, it was 12,000.

But in actual money. LAUGHTER I think that's what, six quid, that is a translation.. LAUGHTER I think that's what Sixquid is a translation. No, I think that's a few thousand. It is. There was three of us and yeah, it was. Right here. But no one else bit. Well, we accidentally one of us outbid each other. We're getting...

We got two incredibly motivated buyers. It's so weird. I feel like that was taking your quiz seriously. Yeah, it does feel like that was... That one's interested how much Michael Fertz Cain was auctioned for. OK, lower, lower quiz seriously. Yeah, it does feel like that was... That one's interested how much Michael Fertz cane was auctioned for. Okay, lower, lower, lower. Yeah, lower. I'm gonna say lower.

Thank you. But I'm what you want to do. I'll say higher for a bit of difficulty. I'm screwed for my... Well, thank you. That's really conjured. Yeah, it was obviously much less than... It was... It was 650 pounds.

LAUGHTER Don't know, you're interested? That's a bargain. My foot. Foot, cane, yeah. Okay. Big foot, they used to call him. Edmund Hittery found him. There was a cane up for auction recently for half a million dollars. Okay. No cane that was? Charlie Chaplin's.

Charlie Chaplin's cane from modern times sold for $420,000. This one went for more? It was... Did Yoda have a cane or a lawyer? Yoda has a cane, yeah. Who has a more famous cane? No, who is it? Michael Cain. No.

It was Michael Cain. No, it wasn't Michael Cain. It was a very normal cane but had a light on the end with batteries and it lit up. No, it wasn't Michael Cain. It was a very normal Cain, but had a light on the end with batteries and it lit up. Oh, the lightsaber? Was it a lightsaber? It was used by a survivor of the Titanic. Oh, yes! The lifeboat. This is incredible. She used it to signal, and it was essentially a Cain,

but I don't know why she thought to take it on the boat. Because what else is she using it for? Oh, onto the lifeboat. Yes, she took it onto the lifeboat. She's signal with it. And it was the guidepost was $500,000, and it went for $50,000. It went for $50,000. It went for $50,000.

Does that body have as much as... LAUGHTER Michael Collins is keen. Well, he's been to space. LAUGHTER So, come on. That's where he got the idea for a United Island. Yeah, he looked out.

But it was to be shared between 11 of her heirs and that they thought they were going to get half a million. They got, what's that, like, four, four thousand five hundred each they got in the end. Hey, here's the most significant walking stick in history. This, I think this genuinely has a claim to be the most important one. It was wielded by the Archbishop of Milan in 2005. OK. So, come on, thank you for your church history.

What's happening in 2005? Roboto Bachelese Milan, was it that? It's New Pope. New Pope. Oh. And he was a very significant Catholic leader, the... The pose of a pub. Yeah. Wow. You have gone downhill. What a bears do, tell me, Andrew. a very significant Catholic leader, the... The pose of a pub. LAUGHTER Wow. You have gone downhill. What a bears do, tell me, Andrew.

LAUGHTER Sorry, the algebraic of Milan was a senior guy. And he might... Like, I dread to think what my wife would say of that fact. The algebraic of Ireland was very senior. He could have been a contender if he could have made it to be Pope. And he appeared in public at the conclave, whatever it is, walking with a stick.

And it was seen as a sign by the other Cardinals who might have voted for him on block. He's saying, no, I'm sorry. Because they always vote for youthful people, don't they? They're the vote of a Cardinal Ratsinger who was mid-80s. Yeah, yeah, you're right. Yeah. He would have been a great...

I was like a secret sign to say, like, that one. Well, that's how it was interpreted. Yeah, and he would have been a very radical pope. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Well, he was pro-controception pro. No, he wasn't. He was none of that. But he was slightly more progressive, maybe maybe than Benedict XVI ended up being.

So, you know, I need to move us on in a second. Oh, some amnesty's quickly. Yeah, very quickly. So they quite often have these things where you can give in your weapons or whatever. And there was one quite recently where there was a rocket launcher was handed in in Cleveland. In Gernsey, they handed in a Klingon war sword.

Oh, wow. In Birmingham, they handed in a three-foot cannon. And in Hertfordshire, they handed in a herb cutter and a fondue fork. LAUGHTER All right, we need to move on to our next fact. It is time for fact number three, and that is my fact. My fact this week is that in 2010, the annual Liars Club Li of the Year award was marred with controversy

when the winning liar was accused of having lied about his lie. LAUGHTER It's huge news. It's big. In Burlington, Wisconsin. So this is a club that began in 1929. Because of a lie, as well, the story

is that two journalists basically decided to announce that there was a local lie of the year that happened, they sent it out as a new story and they thought it would disappear. But then the country picked up on it and it got spread around the country and then as the next year was approaching, they were getting all these messages saying, we're so excited for the lie of the year competition from the Liars Club and so they had to then actually invent the Liars Club in order to have the lie of the year. So it's been going since 1929. And it's effectively, if anyone was reading every year Edinburgh, does the funniest jokes

of the fringe, right? It's that kind of thing. It's that kind of thing. People. It's just a bit of a joke. Exactly. So the Li was sent in by someone called David Mills and he said, his Li was, I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.

That was the Li. That's not a good lie. And every single lie that you read of the modern-day lies club, it's just these one-liners. And it was discovered that that wasn't an original line. That was someone, it possibly Stephen Wright, the comedian. Oh, yeah. And then the two runner-ups were also stolen lines. So people are allegedly just taking funny lines off the internet

and saying, this is my life. Exactly, yeah. So the times have changed. So the the Lios club obviously had to deal with this and they just came out and said, well, we don't care, that's fine. And so it just went on and they kept their championship. But yeah, it made me realize that there's a line club and it's not the good one, the good one is the British one. Have you read about the British one? The one in Cumbria? Yeah. Yeah, so that was... So this one in America has been going since the 20s.

The one in Cumbria has been going through since the 70s, and it was held in honour of a former landlord at the bridge in. It was revived by his grandson, who was a 160-year-old former cesspit cleaner from Hungary. Pfft. But it is essentially just the same thing, isn't it? Although I think the Cumbria one, they tend to tell a bit more of a long story. You get five to seven minutes and you go up and you build this long story.

So someone who won it one year has said that they took a wheelie bin as a submarine and traveled under the ocean. And it's a real, of a whimsical tall tale. Yeah, yeah. There was one, in 2011, Glen Boyleum won, after telling a tale about crossing a whip it with a mink. But Paul Burrows failed to defend his title with the story about a bishop and a magical sausage.

LAUGHTER The one in 1929 was supposedly one by someone who said that they'd seen a three mile long whale. And then the second year, they rang up and said to the people, so, okay, live the year last year was this thing. What's the live the year this year? And they didn't have an answer because they didn't have a competition.

And so they said that the local police chief had said, I never tell a lie. And that was their lie. Right. They kind of do a few things like that. And that was their lie. That's the one. They kind of do a few things like that. So there was one year, a few years in, they had 1,000 entries.

So this was the fourth year in. And they had one from Canada, and they disqualified it because they did want it to be an international contest. And the head of the contest said, let the foreign countries pay up their war debts if they want to get in the liars contest. LAUGHTER Is a huge leap.

You can imagine, like, Jeremy and Britain and Frazgold, we might as well pay up that. Is there a war debt from Canada? Not as far as I knew, but, you know... He knows about something. Right, the... Superkins did it one year, the British one. British one. Yeah. And one. Yeah.

Yeah, she... Yeah, she's a winner of the li, the British one, British one. And one, yeah. Yeah, she, yeah, she's a winner of the lion's club. Well, I was, I told you, it was a nice guy, Paul Hollywood. That's a joke. He is a nice guy, that's a joke. No, it was Mary Berry, it was Mary Berry. But there is a thing about what men and women lie about, because I think there are surveys, various surveys that say,

oh, women lie more, oh, men lie more, and I'm sure there's almost nothing between it, but there seems to be a bit of evidence that women tend to lie more about positive feelings. Oh, you know, like, oh no, it's nice, or whatever, that it's like that kind of thing. That's a really interesting fact, honey. Wow.

You should do that on the show, absolutely. No, it's completely average, darling. Oh, no. And, you know, like, then, then what men like is on a bow slime or, you know. No, it's completely average, darling. LAUGHTER Anyway.

LAUGHTER There is a thing that if children lie early on in their life, then it's supposed to be a sign of intelligence. For that. So they did a thing where they gave kids a tie and put it behind them. And then they said, whatever you do, don't look at it. And then they left the room.

And some of the kids looked at it, and some of them didn't, and some of them lied about it, and some of them didn't. And they found that when they looked left the room, and some of the kids looked at it, and some of them didn't, and some of them lied about it, and some of them didn't. And they found that when they looked in the future, or they didn't look in the future, in the future. LAUGHTER Oh, yeah.

In the future, when they looked back, and they found that the ones who kind of lied about it had a higher IQ, they're absolutely best ones with the ones who didn't look at it and didn't lie about it. They tended to do better in future life. Someone at my primary school said that he wrote golden brown by the stranglers.

That's amazing. And he was convincing, because actually, if you think of the lyric, I was thinking, yeah, I can see that. I was absolutely fooled. I found out the truth somewhere around 2017. Did you guys hear about Theodore Shashmit? No, who's that?

This is just a doctor. And he was writing a report about lying, and a patient he treated who had a particular condition to do with lying. And this is amazing, right? In the 1990s, he had a patient who he nicknamed, because when you write up patients, you don't give their name, you give a student name for them.

He had a patient who he called Mr. Pinocchio. And the reason for that was, if Mr. Pinocchio ever tried to lie, if he tried to lie, he would pass out and have convulsions. Okay? What? There was something in his neural chemistry, which meant... Oh, my God. He couldn't do it.

The only problem was he was a high-ranking European official constantly involved in negotiations. LAUGHTER Every time he even so much has tried to lie, He was a high-ranking European official, constantly involved in negotiations. LAUGHTER Every time he even so much has tried to lie, he would start having convulsions and passing out. And so it was a nightmare. And it was... And he'd been involved in Brexit. LAUGHTER

Yes, on our side. And it's... Yeah, and it's... It was a form of epilepsy. He had this tiny tumor. That's incredible. Tiny tumor inside his brain. It was operated on successfully. Is it a superhero thing in a way? He's amazing Prime Minister, right? Yeah.

You know he's telling the truth. I cannot tell you. Prime Minister of Minotaur's been all for 50th day running. As... What like... Yeah, it is. Like, if everyone knows that if you ever lie, you're going to do this, then they know that what you're saying is the truth.

Yes. Except that he had the operation, had the tumor removed. Oh, so... Or did he? LAUGHTER Those are the only people who aren't allowed to enter the Lies Club, isn't it? It's politicians. Politicians.

Yeah, yeah, the Rumbria Lies Club. I'm sorry, people with incredibly rare tumors, yeah, yeah. Them as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Them as well. Yeah, yeah. It's a weird thing. Isn't it great? I'm just remembering an old childhood story. When you're lied to as a kid, and you don't realize it

until you're in your 20s, in this case, for me. Gordon, yeah. Well, I got told a story at school. I was at my friend Tom's house, and I went to the toilet, and there was no toilet paper there. And I came out afterwards, and I said to my friends, oh, and there was no toilet paper there. And I came out afterwards and I said to my friends, oh, they've got no toilet paper there. And then one of my friends said, oh yeah, none of them

in the family wipe their buns. And I went, what do you mean they don't wipe their buns? And they said, they're all clean shitters. It just happens. So they don't have toilet paper here. And then my other friend went, did you not know that about Tom? And I said, I know I didn't know that about Tom. That's amazing.

And so I believed for about 10 years. More than 10 years. No, no, no, no, no. You told us this, haven't you, at a time when you still believed in? Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no. I remember this, I remember this,

barely. APPLAUSE Here's what I mean. 10 years in, the logic broke down for me, because I thought that can't be possible. And instead of accepting the truth, I went, hang on, this is incredible. Are you telling me that the parents who are not related,

because this could be genetic? LAUGHTER They both don't need to wipe their ass. They must've been dating and then they moved in and they just noticed the one toilet roll just kept hanging there. And then they produced non-ass wiping children. That's what happened 10 years after.

I continued the logic outside of it. And then it was, yeah, late 20s, it clicked. I was like, hang on a second. I think they were lying to me. LAUGHTER Dan, does your wife ever give you advice about which facts to say on the show? LAUGHTER She's never heard the show.

Stop the podcast! Stop the podcast! Hey everyone, this week's episode of Fish is sponsored by ExpressVPN. Yes, ExpressVPN is a perfect place to go if you would like a tunnel to be built metaphorically, of course, between your computer and any websites that you visit. Wait, you didn't tell me this was a metaphorical tunnel, James. I've had the people in my garden for the last two weeks. You mean this is easier than that? This is so much easier than getting people to dig a tunnel in your garden to the headquarters of Google or the headquarters of anywhere else. The good thing about ExpressVPN is number one, it's very, very fast. Number two, it's easy to use. Number three, they never

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unavailable in your own country. Absolutely, so the thing that we're here to tell you is that you can get an extra three months for free on top of one year package when you sign up to express VPN. And the way you do that is you go to expressvpn.com forward slash fish. So head to expressvpn.com slash fish and get an extra three months for free on a one year package. Okay, on with the podcast. On with the show. It is time for our final fact of the show and that is James. Okay, my fact this week is that unusual crisp flavors in history include Prosecco, Fish Curry, Buttered Garlic Scallop, Vagina and Arthur Skargill.

Almost didn't let me get to the end of that one, though. This is, I know Richard, you're a big fan of crisps. I'm just, at some point you must have made a choice about which order to put those last two crisps in. LAUGHTER You see, for Jaina Arthur Scargill, or is it Arthur Scargill or for Jaina? Which of those is... Which of those is funnier?

I think he made the right choice. Oh, thank you. Who is Arthur Scargill? I don't actually know. That's not really the important part of the fact, but... OK. He was... What's a vagina? LAUGHTER Arthur Skargel was basically the main guy in the minus strike in the 80s,

they suppose it was. Yeah. And basically, it was Guy who made some human-flavored cannibal crisps. And they came in traffic ward and bank manager and Arthur Scargel flavor in the 80s. And he was going back because there were hedgehog crisps. And hedgehog crisps were really famous in the 80s. And he was kind of going in a slight sort of animal welfare thing and saying, well, you shouldn't really be eating hedgehog crisps, but why not eat Arthur Scargel crisps instead?

Do you remember hedgehog crisps, Richard? I remember hedgehog crisps. I why not eat half a scogel crisps instead? Do you remember Hedgehog crisps, Richard? I remember Hedgehog crisps. I remember Arthur Scogel. Very well, I remember. Yeah, Hedgehog crisps was like, everyone, it blew everyone's mind. It was like about 10 or something. Everyone just went, oh, you're kidding me. You, it's what? Hedgehog crisps.

It's like there's the funniest thing anyone had ever done in the history of the world. Someone invented Hedgehog crisps. They were just like beef, really. As anyone had ever done in the history of the world. Someone had invented hedgehog crisps. They were just like beef, really. As anyone who's ever eaten hedgehog will know. So I don't think they had real hedgehog in them anymore than Arthur Skogel crisps had real Arthur Skogel in. No, that was the problem, actually.

Because they called them hedgehog crisps, and then trade descriptions said they couldn't use the name because they didn't have actual hedgehogs in them. And then later they called them hedgehog flavor crisps. Because it's just actually in the early days of like proper crazy flavors of crisps. Yeah, right. Do we know what Arthur Scarvga,

what he would have tasted, like what the flavor was? To be honest, I think they were just branded like that. I think they just tasted of random beefy meat. Okay, right. He would have tasted like the solidarity, the working. Okay, right. He would have tasted like the solidarity, the working man, my friend. He would have tasted like...

APPLAUSE He would have tasted a social justice, God, let's go. Have you heard... Did you hear of Virgin Mary, flavoured crisps? So, these were released in the last decade. This was 2013 by Pratamolge. They released... And they got a lot of complaints,

obviously, from Christian and Catholic groups. And what Pratamolje had intended was the non-alcoholic version of a bloody Mary. Oh. Virgin Mary. Oh. Oh, to Mata-Jus. It was basically tomato-rover-crest, but they called them Virgin Mary Flavor-crest. That's very funny.

Is that the sort of thing the Pope would have been unhappy about? Or would he be fine? Well, if it had been the archbishop of Milan, Virgin Mary Flavor Crests. That's very funny. Is that the sort of thing the Pope would have been unhappy about? Or would he be fine? Well, if it had been the archbishop of Milan, he probably... I wonder if the Giner Crests would have been available in the UK, because I was looking up what you're allowed to do as a product and release it, and there's so many rules with particularly companies house.

Turned feverishly, got 15 tabs open, trying to find anywhere that'll ship these to you. LAUGHTER Oh, man. I'm just trying to find anywhere that'll ship these to you. Oh, man. I'm just trying to find out about the trace description rules, actually, yeah. It's a baguina. It's a baguina. It's a hub.

It's a New Zealand hub. But it's amazing. So there's been a list that's been revealed of all the company names that have been rejected since 2019. And it's over 56,000 names. So I don't think vagina crisps would have made it into. And so, okay, so these are a few of the names that were applied for to say,

can we be a business in the UK that were rejected? So you've got Anusale Limited, not allowed. Ask cleaning limited, rejected twice. Mick Shagger limited, Bell and Holdings, and Little Prick's acupuncture. LAUGHTER None were allowed. Wow.

Yeah. The vagina crisps they made actually by a Lithuanian company, so you're right to be doubtful. They're called chas. And they look to the ingredients. So to get a vagina flavor, they use salt, onions, garlic, sugar, cream powder, yeast extract,

oh! Lemon powder, parsley, black pepper, sour cream, and bay leaves. And they also come penis flavored. Oh! And when I say come, I mean... LAUGHTER And their flavoring comes from smoked salt, tomato powder, sugar, yeast extract, again, maybe some cross-contamination there, and spices. And they also sell Bosch flavor crisps where all the money goes to Ukraine.

So yeah, that kind of cool company. Wow, but is that, do you think they've actually worked out that the average penis and vagina smells what those ingredients make up? I've got taste rather than smells usually crisps. I mean, it's open the package. Oh, yes. Dan, you're about to lose your mind when you first taste a crisp. So excited.

I smell it. I snort my crisp. Smells very integral today. What they claim is that that did happen, that they got a load of experts in the field. Yeah. Which field was this? LAUGHTER And they went to some flavoring experts

and put the two together and they came up with this. I haven't tasted them, so I couldn't possibly say. And they left one packet of vagina crissom, one packet of penis crisps in the factory overnight. Next morning, a million packets. So, I found it slightly old, Clay, it was from about 10 or 15 years ago. And it was that half the crisps eaten in the EU, or what was the EU,

are people eating crisps in Britain? That Britain ate half the crisps in the EU. That's a huge thing. Because crisps are not as much of a thing nearly on the continent. And they, like, you might have an olive. You might have some sort of very civilised... They have layers, don't they? That's why I always notice when I go... Yeah, but who buys the layers?

It's British people in holiday. British people in the broad. Yeah. This goes right to the top, James. Like... Is that why they call them leg? Because it's kind of funny. It sounds a bit like having sex. Yeah. This goes right to the top, James. Oh, no. Is that why they call them leg? Because it's kind of funny. It sounds a bit like having sex. And they're not going to get English people to buy us.

That's right. That's why they do it. Yeah. That's why I bought those biscuits in Montenegro called Noblices. Wow. Anything to declare, sir? I have nothing to declare except this cane and these noblice. LAUGHTER But in Europe they eat paprika crisps, right?

That's their favourite thing. Whereas we're the geniuses behind Corn Maze Snacks, it's the truth, which we always think of as crisps. And the 1970s was such an extraordinary era. It was like the 90s for the internet, but for Corn Maze Snacks. Right. 1970.

Sorry, what is a court? Can you give me an example? Oh, I'm about to. Oh, sorry. Oh. Don't you worry about that. OK. By the end of this little bit, you will be in no doubt as to what a Corn Maze Snack is, I promise you.

Gary on Professor? 1970. OK. 1970. They invent what's it? Oh, yeah. Wow. 1973, they invent skips. 1974, they invent frasals. 1977, they invent monster munch. All within seven years. Yes. The big hitters, all within seven years.

Who are you? Who are they? You're saying it's like NASA. Well, do you know what? Quavers were invented in 1968 before man walked on the moon. Wow, and before the Beatles broke up. Yeah, exactly. Gosh, you could have had... You could have been eating some quavers as you heard the news that the Beatles are broken up. That is striking. That is striking.

Thank you. It is striking. They could have had quavers on the moon. That would have been amazing. That would have been amazing. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Do you know, listen, I know you love get about quavis on the moon. That would have been amazing. That would have been amazing. Yeah. Do you know, listen, I know you love an undiscovered hero on the show. Yeah. What Leslie Ivy did? No.

1974, Leslie Ivy. Okay, something to do, something snack related. Yeah, very much so. Okay. invented a new flavor. He's, Leslie Ivy is a machinist. He was a machinist at the Smith-Crisp factory. And he is the guy who invented how to put stripes on frasals.

Oh, wow! Yeah, wow. And he is here tonight! LAUGHTER That's a weird suntan you've got, Leslie, sort of... The first two ever flavors. You know that... You used to just be ready-sorted. And it was Tato Chris, who came up with flavours for the first time.

OK. I got called Joe Murphy, he ran it, and Shemus Burk, who is his chief technician. And they thought, we found a way to get flavour onto a crisp, and they experimented with two flavours. They thought we're going to start with just experiment, with just in the lab or just experiment. And those two flavours, the first two flavours ever in thought we were going to start with just experiment, with just in the lab, with just experiment. And those two flavours, the first two flavours, ever in the history of crisps,

choose an onion, salt and vinegar. Ah, wow. How about that, that's the thing. So the dollar might have... ..got the stranglehold on the flavour market. Because they are the two. Tired of it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, they were literally the first two they ever tried.

I was reading that they thought of crisps in the old days as potatoes, because they're made of potatoes. So you would... So... No, but the new is... We always like to throw something you don't know. Yeah, that's a good show. But...

First, the Pope now does. It's... It's very funny. Because... That's the kind of place. Please, go on, Professor. Like... So potatoes are made.

Look, so Chris made a potato, right? That's great. They thought, you know, only things that go with potatoes. Cheese and onion, you'd have a potato dish, you know, and you'd have some cheese and onions on the side of it. Or you'd slice potatoes and boil them up with some cheese and onions. So those were the natural things. And they hadn't freed their minds yet

using the process that was called gas chromatography. And that was a very, that was a new procedure after the war. They invented that. Basically, in the old days, to get an apple flavoring, you would have to start with a ton of apples then you'd end up with two grams of apple flavor. Yeah. And then gas chromatography meant you could identify the compounds

that made that flavor and recreate it. Yeah. Another hero from the history of crisps, Laura Scudder, she invented bags of crisps. Okay, so before her, you would get a big barrel of crisps, of Tato crisps, the chips in America, or you be tins or display cases, and you go in and they kind kind of shovel them into something, and you would take them out. A bag? A bag. A bag. There's no...

You're getting around it, it was a bag. But what she did is she got her workers to take home sheets of wax paper. They ironed them in the shape of what we would now today know as crisp bags, and then they would take them to the factory the next day, and they would put actual crisps in crisps bags. And we never had that before that. Right. And she was also the first person to put fresh by dates

on any products, as these will be fresh for this... Fresh but... You know, like has a best before and... In America, yeah, fresh by this. Fresh by this. Let's say yes. LAUGHTER So...

LAUGHTER She's really interesting, because she only got into crisps, because she had a shed, and she wanted to rent it out. That was... That was the year she came up with. She was selling it to people to work in, and there was a guy who claimed to be a barber,

but he was actually selling bootleg alcohol, and she was very religious, and she didn't like this, so she kicked him out, and she's like, well, what am I going to do with this shed? I might as well make crisps. Oh, come on. Sorry, can I ask a question, just a point of order? Oh, my barber.

Do you mean barber shop guy? LAUGHTER APPLAUSE Yeah, she couldn't get insurance for her delivery trucks because she was a woman. And so she had to find a special insurance company. And she wants to turn down a $9 million offer for her company because the buyer wouldn't guarantee her employer's jobs

to Arthur Scargel would be proud. Mmm. Yeah. And Quavers. Yes. Is it true, and I'm looking at you, Rich, have one else asked? Yes. Is it made of the leftovers from potatoes,

which have not made it into crisps? So basically, it's the starch that gets... The walker's factory has a log flume that the potatoes all go down. Right. Which washes out some of the starch. They all get their photo taken, but not me. LAUGHTER

Oh, I want that one. Look at you. Oh, I definitely want that one. It's above the mountain piece. Every time I remember, look at his face there. Look at his eyes. He's dead now, of course, dead now. A good question. I don't know. I thought they were corn, but press it and not press the potato.

I think that's why they got invented a bit earlier. Maybe, yeah. But I read that the starch has turned into quavas from the potato, so it's a way of using everything that they have, basically. Like, nose to tail eating. Yes. But for potatoes. Yeah, exactly.

That's good. I know that monster munch were not originally called monster munch. They essentially got released a year earlier. I think this is the best ever name change that a product has had. So in 1977, they came out as Monster Monch and were a huge hit. But the year before, yeah, they were called something else. I would say, I think, they look like hands to me. I would say hands, was the name?

Yeah. Yeah, do you know what? When they first came out, they were called hands. Yeah. That's right. They were called hands. Good name. Yeah. Good name. What were they called? They'd also look a bit like if you had tiny hands,

like knuckle dusters, right? Like you can fit your... You can fit two fingers in, and maybe... Wow. Good. And they... I was talking about the vagina crest. I was talking about... God. I assume it must have had some monster in their original ways. Oh, oh.

So, yeah. Was it to do with the dance? Was that big night monster? One night monster. The monster's dance? A monster mash, yeah. No, although no, that is a really bad pun. Oh, monster, monster.

So I tell you, you won't get it if you're thinking of puns. I wish, I don't think you were incapable of doing a pun this bad. York, Minster. York, Minster. Oh, yeah, no. It's not on many words away. I wish you were capable of doing a pun this bad. York Munster. Oh, yeah, nice. Not a million years away. He is capable. I take it, man. I stand corrected. Welcome to the world of Newbrand.

York Munster. I told it was a bad brand. They were called Prime Monster. I literally was about a bad breath. They were called prime months. I literally was about to say that. And I thought that's so shit, I'm not going to say that. You know what? Richard, if someone says that on Pointless, do they still get the point? Yeah, yeah.

Well, I don't do Pointless anymore. But yes, if I look in the eyes and believe them. Oh, my God. I didn't even get the... They're prime minister. They're prime minister. Oh. Richard, that's genuinely good to go down

as one of the most disappointing moments of my life. And... And you've had a few, right? Yeah. My kids will hear this episode, not my wife, obviously. She doesn't have the same part. Let's do... Let... Let it. Anybody? Anyone... Anyone guess it?

Then? Prime Minister. It's the right answer. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Oh! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE And that's all the time we have! That's it! That is all of our facts!

Thank you so much for listening! I win this episode and... If you'd like to get in contact with any of us about the things that we've said over the course of this podcast, we can be found on our Twitter accounts. I'm on at Shriberland, James. At James Harkin. Andy.

At Professor Andrew Hunter Murray. At Andrew Hunter, Richard. That's a good question. At Richard Osmond, I think. It's at Richard Osmond, there we go. Well, you can get us on our group account, which is at No Such Thing, or you can go to our website, No Such Thing as a Fish.com. All of our previous episodes are up there, so do have a listen. Thank you everyone for being here tonight. Richard, thank you so much for being here tonight.

And we'll be back again next week with another episode. We'll see you then. Good bye! Thank you.