No Such Thing As A Fish - 506: No Such Thing As Jenga Cop

Episode Date: November 23, 2023

Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss Heads, Senna, Leas and Toes. Leas and Toes. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes. Join Club Fish for ad-free epi...sodes and exclusive bonus content at apple.co/nosuchthingasafish or nosuchthingasafish.com/patreon

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi everyone, just before we started this show, we wanted to remind you of something that you should already be well aware of, which is that our esteemed colleagues and co-podcasters, Dan Treiber and Andrew Hunter Murray have both written books, and they are truly fantastic books. So, if you have anyone in your life who is a fish fan? Who God forbid? Think that Dan and Andy are the superior half of fish? Perhaps that person is you. Then why not get them for Christmas? A book by Dan and a book by Andy. Dan has written the theory of everything else. And honestly, when I read it on every page, I thought, how have you been hogging these facts for this book, rather than sharing them on the podcast, it is so selfish.
Starting point is 00:00:45 But it's made for a brilliant book, stunning revelations on every page. Andy has written the last day and the sanctuary. They're both thrillers, they're real page turners, they're a fantastic twist and turns, and of course they're making some very intelligent points about society today. So get both of those for anyone you know who's a big fan of Dan and Andy. But Anna, what if the people listening to this prefer this half of the podcast, the James and Anna half of the podcast? What are those people going to do? Oh, you mean the 95 other percent of our listeners? I don't know, James,
Starting point is 00:01:20 have we done anything interesting lately? We have indeed. I don't know if you recall, because it was before you went on maternity leave. But we wrote a book called Everything to Play for, The QI Book of Spots. And it is another book that is jam full of facts. Do you know why ancient Egyptian athletes remove their splines? Why pool balls no longer explode on impact? How bum-slapping improves team performance? All that and more, you can learn in our book,
Starting point is 00:01:47 which is called Everything to Play for, the QI Book of Spot. But the truth is, if you or anyone you know is a big fish fan, these are the perfect things to get them for Christmas, who doesn't love opening a present at Christmas and getting a good old book that they can read? Read. present at Christmas and getting a good old book that they could read.
Starting point is 00:02:05 Read. If you too like to do this strange reading thing that Adidas, then go to nosicthigsafish.com forward slash books and you'll be able to find all the details of those three books, but they're available wherever you buy your books. Get them all, get them for everyone you know for Christmas, get them now. On with the show. On with the show! I'm with the podcast. Hello and welcome to another episode of No Such Thing as a Fish, a weekly podcast coming to you from the QI offices in Hobard.
Starting point is 00:02:51 My name is Dad Schreiver, I am sitting here with James Harkin, Andrew Hunter Murray, and Anna Toshinsky, and once again we have gathered around the microphones with our four favorite facts from the last seven days, and a particular order here we go. Starting with fact number one, that is Anna. My fact this week is that your brain contains a tender mother, a tough mother and a spider mother. Is that just Dan we're talking about here? Yeah, and it explains everything. It does. Are these like multiple personality traits of like, I have a tough mother that comes, is that the idea of it?
Starting point is 00:03:26 Oh, I love that idea. What would the spider mother be? Well, I assume there's something that they do in the wild where they make webs. I hope they like eat their children. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The spider mother actually eats the tough mother and the tender mother.
Starting point is 00:03:37 It's actually nice with these things. They're just fun names for things in the brain. So these are maninjas, they're in your brain and spinal cord, and they're basically a three layered envelope that protects your brain and spinal cord and there's a delicate in a layer which is called the pier meter which means tender mother or soft mother or pious mother. And so that wraps around the brain and spinal cord a bit like cling film. And then there's a really tough outer layer which is just under the bone of your skull and
Starting point is 00:04:04 that's the durometer, the hard mother, tough mother. And then there's a really tough outer layer, which is just under the bone of your skull, and that's the durometer, the hard mother, the tough mother, and then there's a middle layer, the arachnoid meter, and that's like a network of tissues and the tissue sort of spread out like a spider's web. So really it should be called a spider web mother, but it's not. It's called a spider web. The meninges is, you know, a baby at the top of their head,
Starting point is 00:04:24 they have like a gap where the skull hasn't covered them up. Oh, yeah. The men and G's is the kind of tough stuff that covers their brain, which means that, at least the brain isn't sticking out of their head. That's interesting. I don't know that. And also that little hole there,
Starting point is 00:04:38 that is what the company Baby Gap is named after. Yeah. Yeah. I was just looking at sort of things that happen in the brain, unusual processes and things like that. I really like this. Your brain is so fast that you can judge whether someone is trustworthy or not, even if you haven't seen them consciously. Okay. So they tried this thing where they showed people images for it like a fraction of it, like a millisecond, a couple of milliseconds, right?
Starting point is 00:05:00 Too fast for people to consciously register they had seen a face. Yeah. They were either faces that were, you know, untrustworthy looking or trustworthy looking or what. I don't know what the criteria were. What is that? Is it like one person they've got, you know, and fact out the corner of their mouth and a big overcome?
Starting point is 00:05:17 And a bag of swag. No, I have no idea. Maybe they had to assess from people what they found trustworthy. I trust very first. For some people, my only trust people who look like sort of comedy burglars from the 1980s.
Starting point is 00:05:28 But when they showed them those images, even for a fraction of a second, they didn't consciously see them, but the bit of their brain, the amygdala, which processes strong emotions, particularly in relation to whether you trust someone or not, fire it up. Wow.
Starting point is 00:05:40 It's not weird. Wow. Do you know what the amygdala means? Ormond. Yeah. The brain is just the amygdala means? Almond. Yeah. The brain is just full of weirdly named stuff because it's like a structure and people could look at it hundreds of years ago
Starting point is 00:05:51 if they took out someone's brain after they died. And like name the bits of the structure. It's just got already old fashioned order names. Like almond. Seahorse. Indeed. Oh yeah, the seahorse. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:02 It's because like if you are looking at someone's brain and you're like, which bit do I need to take out? And they say, well, it's the more blood fontanello or whatever. You wouldn't know what it was. But if you say the seahorse, you can look at it and go, oh, that looks a bit like a seahorse. I'll take that bit out, yeah. And the matter, the piamata and other matters,
Starting point is 00:06:21 they're named after the fact that they kind of cover things. Like a mother might hold her baby. They come from the Arabic. Wow. I wonder with the speed that you were talking about a second ago Andy, the like I was just thinking a quiz show, right? How quickly does the answer come to you prior to your finger, the information getting to your finger and you pressing a buzzer, right? If you were able to hook up your brain to the bit that lights up that says you know the answer, how quick could it be? Are you pitching a quiz where no one actually asks the questions
Starting point is 00:06:51 and people just buzz in and say, no, you need the question. Are you thinking that like, you're going to university challenge, everyone else is using their fingers like absolute noobs. Yeah, and you've got something attached to your actual competitive advantage. You've got your head on the button, exactly. That's it. I'm like, I'm keeled over. and you've got something attached to your actual competitive advantage. You've got your head on the button. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:07:05 I look like I'm keeled over, but no. Shriver, Australia. The only flaw in your plan is that you actually wouldn't know any of the answers anyway. It doesn't matter how you're pressing the button. I've genuinely never got an answer on a university challenge. No, I think that's good, but they show you the question for a minute and a minute. And the part of your brain associated with
Starting point is 00:07:30 Tocque Benastone fires, then it's actually a team of neuroscientists who answer the question for you. But like several days later, after we've seen ours. But is the kind of thing your brain does? And mostly I associate this sort of thing with, that you know there's
Starting point is 00:07:45 that split brain operation that used to be done on epileptic people. It was like it was a revolutionary operation and you basically cut the brain in half down the corpus colosum which is a bit that splits the left side from the right side of the brain and it was amazing because it stopped people having epileptic fits when nothing else would work. They did loads of experiments on these people whose two brains were working fine, but they couldn't communicate with each other. And so the reason I thought, for instance, of that university challenge thing was that
Starting point is 00:08:14 someone who'd had that operation, they would be shown a picture of a face to their right eye, which goes into the left hemisphere, and they're asked what they've seen and they can say face. But if it goes into the other eye and into the opposite hemisphere, because it's going to the wrong hemisphere that doesn't process language, once they're asked what they've seen, they can't say face, but they can draw a face. Oh wow, yeah. But they'll just say, I've got no idea what I've seen, but their hand will draw a face. Here's my pitch. Yeah. Here's a cop drama, right? And there's a witness to a crime, but you only saw it with one eye,
Starting point is 00:08:49 the eye which doesn't know what, but he can draw it. And you've got a cop, but he's only got the other eye. Yes. Yes. And it's basically Picsderry, Picsderry Cop. That's actually really good.
Starting point is 00:09:01 And that can be as equal to Dictionary Cop, which is... All right, I thought you were going to be like Bukaroo cop, right? Mouse trap cop. Jenga cop. He's got two hours to stop this building falling over. It's not got any mortar, it's just bricks. But, you know, fine.
Starting point is 00:09:17 It's a dry stone building, and one of the bricks has got a bomb in it, but he doesn't know which one. So he has to keep removing the bricks to find the bomb without the building falling down. But it's in a very congested area, so he can only put the bricks on top of the building at the top. They've removed. This is my good.
Starting point is 00:09:36 Dries to Walt is probably set of the Cotswolds. So you have some lovely location filming before the... Yeah, yeah. This is bloody good, Jamie Cobb. There is just sort of one other as possible spy film follow up. Oh, yeah. Where you can basically get people to say things that they don't know they've said, I guess,
Starting point is 00:09:53 because there was another guy who had his brain cut in half. And they asked him the question to one side of his brain. They flashed the question, who's your favourite girlfriend? He was a boy. Oh, right. Yeah. Who's your favourite girlfriend? And then he was asked, do you know what question we've asked you? And he was shrugged and was like, no, I haven't seen anything.
Starting point is 00:10:08 I didn't see anything. But then he spelt out, he giggled, and said, no, and then spelled out Liz in Scrabble Tiles. Right. With his other hand. How awful is that? You're just giving scrabble tiles. 10 points as well for the Zed. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:20 Yeah, he put on a triple-error score as well. Well, and that's your follow-up. So the, uh, Scrabble Tile. Scrabble-cut. That's good. Have you guys heard of Heminglicklect, which is kind of in the same sphere here? Heminglicklect. Heminglicklect is when this is people who have had a stroke. There's a bit of brain damage that goes on whereby
Starting point is 00:10:37 they only experience basically one side of their visual field. So if they've gone to shave, they'll shave off half their face, but leave the other side because it's just not part of their field anymore, right? If they're eating on a plate, they'll eat the right side or left side of the plate. They'll eat just one side of the plate. So it's not just that you can't see presumed that your brain refuses to acknowledge that. Your brain is refusing to acknowledge that. It's there. Yeah. But this is what's amazing. They started looking into heming neglect within memory as well. So they managed to find a group of people
Starting point is 00:11:05 where all of them had been to Milan. So, they asked them the exact same thing. You're standing in the major plaza in Milan. Recall there's many in stores and streets around you as possible in the square, and they could only remember the stores and the streets that were on the right side and not the left. Probably good memories, though.
Starting point is 00:11:22 He asked me to name a shop on a square I'd lived on for about 20 years, I probably couldn't do that. I could name a shop in Milan in the central square bit. Yeah, because they recently got their first Starbucks. And it was some controversy, because actually in Milan, the home of coffee, good coffee, and there was a Starbucks there. It was very nice Starbucks, too.
Starting point is 00:11:41 So that prompted a bit of local discussion. Or according to these people, there was a Bucks. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha clear what caused it because we invented agriculture 10,000 years ago as a species. It's not that. It's like writing dates back to several thousand years and it might be something to do with that. It might be that I keep part of my brain in all of your brains. I wonder what that is. No, but like if you have lots of division of labor and you have a complicated system, you sort of divide up the cognitive task and you need a bit less brain space. I think there is a theory that domestication makes your brain smaller because it works with animals for sure. So I'm way domesticated.
Starting point is 00:12:28 Well, I think humans are domesticated, aren't we? I would know with the domesticated. Well, you domesticated us, aside from cat, according to some interpretation. You domesticated us. The man. The man. Society has domesticated us. To be fair, I don't think I would thrive in the wild.
Starting point is 00:12:44 I don't think you would either. I can curve down anything to you. I contradict that statement. I think, well, I've got some berries and Anna's going off killing a wildcat. And you are trying to think of some cop dramas. I don't know which of us is going to be the most useful in the group in the future.
Starting point is 00:13:01 We will need cop dramas to survive. We'll need that hope that comes from, like, will you find the bomb? Yeah. Okay, brain fart. Yeah. Like, when you have a moment, you can't remember something, right? Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:16 Like, this podcast has been a 10 year long one, for instance. Sure. Yeah. What about a brain squirt? What is that? Brain squirt. Quiz time. It's where you try and think of one thing
Starting point is 00:13:26 and it just shoves out tons of different things. It's like someone says, what's the capital of Malawi? And all you can think of is every other capital in Africa. Oh, we good. Yes, no, I would think, yeah, that's probably closer than to mine, which you would be saying things that sounded right as a ramble. So like a quiz question like that,
Starting point is 00:13:46 but you genuinely went, it's Michael, no, Sarah, Joey, Chandler, what does... Right, mums do when they're trying to remember your name. Yeah. They always run through, don't they? John, Katie, Claire, Hannah, James, James, come over here. It's just a feeble or a board of attempt at reasoning, but it dates back to the 1650s.
Starting point is 00:14:07 That's cool. I was having a brain squirt. It was also, in this dates back to Old English, your brainlocker. What is that? Say it again, brainlocker. Brainlocker. It's someone who looks at a brain in South Africa.
Starting point is 00:14:19 It's my brainlocker. It's just your head. I was going to say it's your skull. Okay, brainlocker. My brainlocker. Crazy, that your head. It's just your skull. My brainlocker. My brainlocker. Crazy. That we had a while for that. It's one little hack. I was reading a lot of neurosciences saying how you can hack your brain to make sure that so if you're someone who forgets things a lot or you have something important that you need to remember and you just don't, you can't find it right it down or anything, take something, take an object and just place it
Starting point is 00:14:43 somewhere it shouldn't be. So if you're leaving the house for example and you're like, oh, why is this, you know, flute? Flute here, yeah. You'll make you go, ah, yes, I've been meaning to do that thing. It's a way of associating with a physical object. So that's just a great hack. I feel like you know, I do that with my hair bands. I put one hair band on the other wrist if I need to remember something.
Starting point is 00:15:02 I put the second one on the other wrist if I need to remember a second thing. And then I put one back on the first wrist if I need to remember something. I put the second one on the other wrist if I need to remember a second thing. And then I put one back on the first wrist if I need to remember a third thing. Oh shit! Stop the podcast! Stop the podcast! Hey everyone, we're here to let you know that this week's episode of Fish is sponsored by Aura Frames. Aura, wow, this sad part really hasn't Aura around it because Aura Frames are absolutely amazing. Like, I don't know about you, Dan, but on my phone, I have well over a thousand photos, most of which I never look at.
Starting point is 00:15:41 What's the point of them being on my phone? I want the frame, I want them on my wall, but I just don't have enough wall space. So what can I do? Well, this is what you can do, James. You can get a single device that sits inside your house that looks like it's a picture frame, and the photo will be in it, but like a sort of Harry Potter wizard magazine,
Starting point is 00:15:58 it will change photos into a new photo every few seconds, depending on the speeds that you want to change it to. It's incredible. You can have your whole year just played in front of you as you're standing in the kitchen or in the bedroom, or if like me, I love having one in the bathroom. In the bathroom, just an aura frame in the bathroom. So you can look at other bathrooms
Starting point is 00:16:19 that you've stayed in over the years. That's what I do, exactly. I have 1,000 photos of bathrooms that I now have projected in my bathroom. another year. And you too can get an aura because from now until Black Friday and Cyber Monday, aura are having their best deal of the year. Listeners can say $40 on their best selling Carver Matt frame by visiting aura frames. That's a U R ar-a-f-r-a-m-e-s.com forward slash fish. When you do that, use a promo code fish and get $40 off their best selling frames. That's right. So head to oraframes.com slash fish, use the promo code fish and you're going to get $40 off their best selling frames and you should do it now because Black Friday and Cyber Monday are here and that is when the deal is for. So head there now, do that.
Starting point is 00:17:08 And terms and conditions apply, but also we are sponsored this week by a LinkedIn. That's right. LinkedIn, have you started a business of sending out purely photos of bathrooms that you want to get out to people with a big, weird fetish for having them put it into slaves in their bathrooms. Well, LinkedIn is the place to find someone like me. This is obviously you all know LinkedIn, such a wonderful place with you working in the business world. It really connects people up. It allows you to find the right people to come and work for your business. And it takes out all the admin of having to put adverts out on the internet, meet people in person. They can tailor descriptions. They can tailor questions for the people you're looking to hire and find you the best candidate for your company. That's right. LinkedIn jobs, they have simple tools,
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Starting point is 00:18:28 MUSIC OK, it is time for fact number two. And that is my fact. My fact this week is that at the 1984 US Grand Prix, it was thought that Ertsin Senna crashed into a wall on the 47th lap, but it turns out it was actually the wall that crashed into him. This is another case for Jenga Cop, I feel.
Starting point is 00:18:55 This is an amazing story. So, Senna is one of the greatest Formula One drivers ever. His career was cut short, because sadly 10 years later he did have a crash in a Grand Prix, which he died. So it basically he was he was in this Grand Prix and he's heading on cutting a corner very tight to the wall as he had done on previous laps. He nicks it. So afterwards they're talking about it and he says there's no way I hit that wall. I'm a precision driver and he was very cocky Center Yeah, I'm a precision driver that wall came into me
Starting point is 00:19:29 So they went out just because I guess you know they thought well, maybe he's right Let's check it out and they noticed that the wall had moved and the reason was is because a car is a human dressed From the jacket cup, but it was also saying anti-caflic propaganda at the time, wasn't it? Cool back to last episode, everyone. So basically, these walls were giant concrete blocks, and on a previous lap, a car had also hit this wall. And what they'd noticed was that it hit it with such force that it had knocked the back of it and so the front bit
Starting point is 00:20:06 Jotted out a tiny bit, but only by 10 millimeters Is He was so precise that that was enough. He knew exactly where he need to take it And so he nick the wall and this is how he is sort of known. He's known as this guy Yeah, he was the best. I believe so. Right. I mean, there's countless arguments in Formula One fans, but for me, he was the best. There you go. You heard it ever.
Starting point is 00:20:34 So tragically, because he was caught off in his prime, we don't know where he would have taken it to. He won three world championships. He's been surpassed by Schumacher and others, but that's because of the longevity of a career. So, yeah, hard to know where he would have gone. I didn't know why it's got Formula One. And it's just...
Starting point is 00:20:51 The whole point of Formula One is that there is a Formula, and it's the set of rules that you have to adhere to. And they change the rules every... I don't know, every year or every couple of years. And, you know, then everyone has to build entirely new cars and it's a nightmare. That is the Formula that everyone's complying entirely new cars and it's a nightmare. That is the formula that everyone's complying with.
Starting point is 00:21:07 What is it about the weight of the aerodynamics and the blah, blah, blah. And I used to know, what I do know someone, a friend of mine, used to work on Formula One doing the kind of modeling, the computer modeling, oh wow, of the aerodynamics of the cars. Right. Basically you just do that hundreds of thousands of times
Starting point is 00:21:23 and modeling the airflow over a car to work out what's gonna be best. And then they change the rules and then you have to adjust everything in a fraction of a millimeter and all of this. It's amazing. And try something slightly further than everyone else is pushing it.
Starting point is 00:21:36 Yeah, because there must be one perfect car, theoretically. Oh, right. That would be the, have the perfect very effective for these rules. I don't know. And they've all crossed the line at the same time. That's right. That's when you have to bring in some variables like Mario Kart.
Starting point is 00:21:53 The red shells. The red shells. A bubble that you drive into. Oh, yeah. It's really slow to down. I mean, it would all over that. But sometimes quite a dry sport to watch. It is very, this is, I think, true of quite a lot of spots,
Starting point is 00:22:10 which is if you're not really into them and you watch them, they seem quite boring on the outside. And then as soon as you start reading about them, it's like, oh my god, this is incredible. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's definitely sure if everyone isn't it. Otherwise, it is just people going round and round a thing. But yeah, you can't make the cars too good,
Starting point is 00:22:25 and obviously there are rules to stop you doing that. Partly for safety, because if you go too fast, it's very bad and safety is massively cracked down the last sort of 30 years. But there have been great cars made in the past that they've had to change the rules to stop happening again, like the 6th wheeled car. Do we have the 6th wheeled?
Starting point is 00:22:40 Yeah, it's so cool. It's amazing. That was it designed by Homer Simpson. It's such a... Yes, it was. No, It's amazing. That was it designed by Homer Simpson. That's right. Yes, it was. No, this was in the 1970s. And it was Tyra, one of the teams, raced a six-wheeled car.
Starting point is 00:22:52 Realized that there would be an advantage to it, because if you have four smaller wheels at the front, rather than two big wheels, then I think you increase the amount of contact with the ground, so you've got more grip on the road. That is to get more traction on the corners. Obviously, that is, like, they've got someone in from the outside who's never worked in farming along before and said,
Starting point is 00:23:12 look at this, how can we improve this car? And they've gone more wheels on it. I imagine being in that meeting room. We're like, they were looking through it, like, we've looked through the manual 30 times now. There's nothing which says the maximum number of wheels is good, we can do it. That must be something to the rules, something that must there's nothing which says the maximum number of wheels is for you. You can do it. That must be something to the rules.
Starting point is 00:23:26 That must be. Every other car ever. No, it's not. They didn't think of putting it in the rules. Like, say, you can't have a crocodile driving. They didn't think of that. There is no rule about the number of wheels. Largely because they did this.
Starting point is 00:23:38 And at the time, there were various slight problems with it because they hadn't perfected the technology X. They'd only just invented the six wheel car. They did get a few podium finishes, I think, for that car. But the FIA banned it in the end, because they worried that we'd just get to a place where people were putting more and more wheels on cars. You just have a hundred wheels on a car. I think they did win. They won one Grand Prix with their Swedish Grand Prix. Wow. What a vindication that must have been. What a moment. All right. Are the cars longer?
Starting point is 00:24:06 Because that's an advantage as well, right? For tight finishes. If your car is suddenly 10 meters long. I think of one problem is, like, when you go into the pit stop to change your tires, if you have to change two hundred tires, you're going to take a two hundred. Yeah. Oh, those are, I love the pit stops.
Starting point is 00:24:22 Yeah. I do, those are the, because that's one of the variation in race, isn't it? And they used to have a lollipop, man. Yeah. love the pit stops. Yeah. Those are the, that's one of the very ancient races, isn't it? And they used to have a lollipop man. Yeah. It's so sweet. It's really sad that they don't anymore. It's probably because they always build the tracks next to primary school.
Starting point is 00:24:34 Right. But I do wonder, like, you just got a little lady in a spot. He's chatting to some of the mums and all the time and saying, I'm just gonna cross the pit stop as down last in 18 minutes. So their job basically was to know when everyone had finished their jobs and then they left at the lollipop
Starting point is 00:24:56 and they could drive off, but now everyone just has a button when you've done your job, you finish your things and the lights change. Just rubbish. And that must be stressful as well because I can readily imagine fitting the wheel in not point four seconds.
Starting point is 00:25:06 I'm never forgetting to press my button. Yeah. Well, if you had your hair button on your left wrist, you'd be like, I know that. Here's a crazy pit stop thing that you're not allowed to do anymore, which is, and do you guys remember, ages ago, Lewis Hamilton, there was a bit of controversy about one of the races
Starting point is 00:25:22 where you have your teams. So he's, what's his team again? He's with Mercedes. Mercedes. So he'd be on the track with another Mercedes rider, a part of the same team. It made more sense for Lewis to win. So there was this big controversy that the guy in the lead slowed down and let Lewis take the win for the points for the team, basically.
Starting point is 00:25:39 It is fine, but it's seen as it's not sport, basically. It's they should be trying. Yeah. But they do the same in cycling, don't they? I thought they had a little time. In cycling, it's not sport, basically. It's they should be trying. Yeah. But they do the same in cycling, don't they? I thought they were having a little time. In cycling, it's basically the whole spot. Yeah. I think if Formula One, it's obviously to boo,
Starting point is 00:25:52 because it was a big controversy at the time when they were instead it. Yeah. But so what you used to be able to do in a pit stop is, let's say you have damaged your car, you could come in, and they've called over the number two, because you're the lead driver, and they would just give you his car you his car. So he would be out of the race. So your number two driver, you would want them to be pretty much exactly the same as you, right? If you're
Starting point is 00:26:15 six foot three with a very spindly arm, you'd need another six foot three with spindly arm. So you don't have to factor on it with adjusting the seat. You're changing the aircon. Already on one. No. But that is the thing, isn't it? Because they will get weighed after the race. The driver and the car are weighed because, if you're too light, it might be dangerous.
Starting point is 00:26:35 And drivers lose about three kilos during a race of hydration, of water weight. Is that so sweaty, right? Yeah. Apparently it gets so hot in there as well. That's what's, you know, it's sweaty, it's hot, it's boiling, and Damon Hill, there's a story. I couldn't find a good source for it,
Starting point is 00:26:49 but it's claimed in a bunch of places that he brings in, for some reason, a thermos of cold black tea, and the heat of the car makes it a nice piping hot tea for him to drink. I heard that, I did it. That's very funny. The safety stuff is just nuts. In the cars these days.
Starting point is 00:27:06 It's so impressive. So these days, every single driver has a monococ. Which is, it was when they used to have two cars. There was so many deaths. They were tripping over a lot. It's getting in the way of the levers. No, it's a cocoon, basically. It surrounds the driver and it's sort of the core of the car.
Starting point is 00:27:23 Oh. And it's like the, I want to say a very hard bag. Like it surrounds the driver and it's sort of the core of the car and it's like the, I want to say a very hard bag, like it surrounds the driver and it keeps them safe even if they crash. So they get into a bag. I missed all the dramatic rides, just like the sort of central command pod of the car which actually encases the driver. If you can imagine the Mininges of the Brains, it's almost like the Mininges of the tribe. Exactly, it's like the very toughest mother. And they call it that, I would have been there in Australia. Yeah, and the helmets are amazing.
Starting point is 00:27:51 The helmets have to be subjected to 800 degree heat for 45 seconds in case there's a fire. Well, they have to be on a stand-up. What? What? The thermos is really taking a battery. Every time you blink, you lose 20 meters of road. If you're going with a fast formula one car.
Starting point is 00:28:08 So you have to be careful when you blink. They've measured it and drivers always blink at the same part of the car. It's really interesting. Really? I read that one thing that if you play the sounds of the cars on a Formula One track to a Formula One driver, they'll be able to tell which track it is
Starting point is 00:28:24 just from the sounds that the car's mic. Wow, that's incredible. You need a special driver's license? Oh, really? Perhaps unsurprisingly. You need a super license. That's what it's called. Really?
Starting point is 00:28:36 Yeah, really? Is that right? So does that mean if I took part in the Las Vegas Grand Prix starts this weekend? If I flew over to Las Vegas and took part in it, I'd get points. But not having the right license. I think you probably will get points. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:49 Wow, do it anyway. I'll try it. Shall I try it? In your lecture car as well. Yeah. Very accelerate, like that. They do accelerate well, but I'm not sure I could get around
Starting point is 00:28:59 with all the laps without retouching. He's now had a lovely coffee at the Supercharger. I wonder if a psychopath is that idea that they don't blink. I wonder if that would make you a better. There's one way apparently of spotting a psychopath according to people who look into it, is they blink much less than a regular person. That's why they're forced to kill and kill again because they're so annoyed about their dry eyes. So I wonder if you blink less, are you a better driver? Oh, they all psychopaths.
Starting point is 00:29:26 Yeah. You're saying all these F on drivers? Well, Senna, Senna just backed him very quickly, sounded a bit sort of like he was in odd mental place a little bit time. Well, as in like, he never, whenever he arrived, his friend said, he never said hi. Like, if he was coming to a race, he was just in a zone. He was just always kind of like, and I just, that's like rude. Sorry, I'm so, my God, I said hi to you this morning and was an effort frankly,
Starting point is 00:29:47 but I didn't. I think that's really normal. Like I would say if you're racing, I can imagine not saying hello to anyone. Like you've got to be so in the zone. Yeah, well so many people that you have to say hi to, because if it's just one or two people who are welcoming you, you're like, oh yeah great, you have a nice chat. But if it's like all the 50 members of the team are saying, hello, I'm like a big mascot in the silly suit. Oh, I'm happy this year. This is called to someone who works
Starting point is 00:30:12 for the catering operation, Lindy Redding, she said. She said he would never say hi if he was at the zone. But when he did say hello, he was very genuine. He used to kiss us and hold our faces, which was hugely intense. But absolutely lovely. You know what? Let's do the not hello next time. There's a great.
Starting point is 00:30:35 That's the greeting of the couple that are doing the washing up so badly that they never are. That's high. That's high. That's high. Speaking of motor racing drivers, have you guys heard of Hella Nice? Hella Nice. Hella Nice. Hella Nice. That's a, that's high. Speaking of motor racing drivers, have you guys heard of Helenice? Helenice. Helenice.
Starting point is 00:30:47 It's a great name. Helenice. Helenice. Helenice, yeah. It was a person from the 1920s. Real name Marieette Ellen Delong. She was an exotic dancer who danced at the Ritz in Paris and then she had a ski accident and couldn't dance anymore and so
Starting point is 00:31:06 it became a racing driver and she raced in five major Grand Prix in France and she was in an accident this while I was reading about her because we were talking about safety. She was in an accident where she was in an Alpha Romeo and she summissated through the air and she wasn't wearing a seatbelt because she didn't have to in those days. Her car went into the crowd, killed four people. But she survived because she landed on a soldier who absorbed the full impact of her body saving her. Oh God, did he die? No, he didn't die.
Starting point is 00:31:36 What? Good grief. So did she fly through the old, did her car, did she? Her car went in one direction, killed some people. She went in the other direction and luckily landed on his very play in soldier. Wow. I can't do it. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time.
Starting point is 00:31:48 I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time.
Starting point is 00:31:56 I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time.
Starting point is 00:32:04 I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can't do it at one time. I can in 1993 have you seen the quite famous crash? Two teammates actually who were called Fitter Paldy and Martini, they were quite near the back. But one of their cars was like just behind the other and I think the left wheel, front wheel of one car, Nick the back wheel of another car and it sent the front one into a full in the back wheel. Oh yes, yeah. Just does the back flip. Happily lands happily lands skate over the finish line Wow, yeah, it really is yeah, the headline martini shaken not stirred Here's a little quiz moment for you all okay, who is the guy who I think has done more formula one races than anyone else I'm 90% sure he's a more formula one races than anyone else. I'm 90% sure. He's done more formula one races than anyone else on the planet, more Grand Prix's,
Starting point is 00:32:46 Grand's Prix. Okay, so someone we must know of. No, no. Is it the Michelin man? It's not the Michelin man. Anna, I feel like you might have the answer. I've just, I've got my hand. I'm bursting.
Starting point is 00:32:58 Are you talking about the safety guy? The guy who drives the safety car. He's been doing it for nearly 25 years. He's done more than 450 Grand Prix. I believe it's the safety car. He's been doing it for nearly 25 years. He's done more than 450, Gronprey. Oh, but it was the same guy. I was going to believe it was just one of those not weird. Every single Gronprey. So what does he do, sorry?
Starting point is 00:33:13 When there's an incident on the track. Yeah. There's an accident or like there's a horse ride out on the track. What happened? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Like, what happened? The school day finishing.
Starting point is 00:33:22 Yeah. Receptions run out. Lady Cod, ladies are ready. Yeah. The safety car drives that onto the track and finishing. Yeah, the reception's run out, Lady Cople, ladies are ready. Yeah. The safety card drives that onto the track and kind of regulates the service. Everyone has to drive.
Starting point is 00:33:30 Yeah, he drives around with 20 miles an hour and everyone has to just slowly go behind him. You're not that tall for the day, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know that feeling when you're driving and someone's kind of coming up your ass, imagine that, like, times a million. Right.
Starting point is 00:33:44 This is what that guy's going through every single day. He's the soul coming up his ass times a million. This is what that guy's going through every single day. He's a sword coming up his ass times a million. That is a tough job. That was work today, darling. Wow. I had 20 men coming up my ass. I'm to 25 years though, you're hard into it. Okay, Zack County is a professional racing driver, he's called Madeleine Duh and he's a... But Madeleine Duh. That's great though, that's really cool. I mean, I guess he's not had any accidents
Starting point is 00:34:27 himself over all that time, so... I don't say it's quite stressful. And he says, can you guess the most stressful person to have behind you? What is in which racing driver is the most... Yeah, it's the most time. Because he said they're quite aggressive sometimes. It must be Schumacher. It's actually Louis Hamilton.
Starting point is 00:34:41 Yeah, that's right. Louis Hamilton's really up in your face, or I'm like zigzagging everywhere, like really pushing, going up towards you. Well, I think it's... What, you have to stay behind him. No, you keep your tyres while I zigzagging. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:55 Just get out of there. I think it's the most precise sport in the world. You guys have just written a book about sports. Oh, I've forgotten. Yeah, it's sports, the big book of sports. It's played by the team. Everything's played by the team. Yeah, it's full time. The big book of sports, isn't it? Everything's play-farting, play-farting, yeah. Yeah, but surely this is the most, this is where the most thought has gone
Starting point is 00:35:09 into the most tiny differences of like, yeah, it is amazing. Must be technologically for sure. Right, yeah, yeah, exactly. Like even, in the formula, there are even limits on the amount of data you're allowed to use to simulate the car aerodynamics. You're limited to 25 terraeraflops of computing power when you're running the computer simulations
Starting point is 00:35:30 of air flowing over a car you haven't even built yet. And then after all that stuff, like literally last night in the warm up for the Las Vegas Grand Prix, someone hadn't nailed down one of the manhole covers properly, just smashed into the car. Oh my god, they heard about that. They get sucked up, yeah. Why do they keep building manhole covers on the F1 track? Well, it's in the actual streets of Las Vegas. Right, it's right.
Starting point is 00:35:56 And they have to nail down every single manhole cover. I think they might not even use nails. They might use concrete or something. God, you don't want to be a sewerage worker who pops up at the wrong line. Oh, fuck! I'm escaped, I'm convinced. Yeah, yeah. That's it, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:36:11 That's it. OK, it is time for fact number three, and that is Andy. My effect is, there is such a thing as a ghost pond. Splash. Yeah. This is a... So, we're all familiar with ponds. Maybe just give us a...
Starting point is 00:36:37 Just for the people in the UK. Why? Well, no, actually, Dan, because, you know, what is a pond and what is a lake? So, it's a very large hill with just matter on it. Oh, no, it's the opposite of that. It's a small indentation with water on it. Sorry, I always get those mixed up.
Starting point is 00:36:57 Oh, you can't be there. You have me going. But basically, there are these things all over, particularly the UK, but I'm sure in other countries too. In fact, all over Europe, they do know that. And they, like all the farms in England used to have ponds, like fields would have a pond here or there in them, and they would either provide water for cattle or they would, you know, they're just useful things to have.
Starting point is 00:37:18 But then over the years, they got abandoned and lots of them dried up. Oh, maybe they got choked by fallen leaves, you know, and all these ponds are now missing from the UK. There used to be twice as many ponds as there are today in the 1970s. We're double the ponds. I know. Like, yes, no one marching. Why is no one supergliding themselves to he throw airponds to bring the ponds back? Well, I think it's important that... Like ponds are great, because so many animals and plants just they make that big of it so you think the full one that was to buy
Starting point is 00:37:53 yeah I've got a pond you got a pond I want to it's on my list of things I'd like to do is to dig a pond very easy just dig a pond pucks some in it. Sorry. Can you just tell us what these ghost ponds are there? Okay. So ghost ponds. I must say about my pond. Just tell us anything. But no, basically they're huge biodiversity hot spots. You know, you get plants and species and dragonflies and beetles and all sorts of stuff. Where before you just have a field. And you know, they're really important for that. And basically, the mud remembers, it's really weird. So, all of these ancient seeds might be left in the indentation that used to be
Starting point is 00:38:32 apond, and they can survive for over a century. And all you have to do, if you have that little dip in the ground, you refill it, expose it to sunlight, and these old species just spring up and they come back with evensions. And it's kind of staggering. So there's a team at UCL, the pond restoration research group, led by Carl Sayer up and they come back with evensions. And it's kind of staggering. So there's a team at UCL, the pond restoration research group led by Carl Sayer, and they've been going around Norfolk restoring these ghost ponds. And suddenly, bang, life, biodiversity, really important stuff,
Starting point is 00:38:56 which is really under threat at the moment. They reckon there's 600,000 that are hidden still waiting to be restored in the UK alone. It's amazing. And it's a lot longer than that, isn't it, for seeds? I'm sure we've mentioned, and I can't remember the exact number, but like the oldest seed ever found that can still be, you know, watered and sunlit and grow is many thousands of years old.
Starting point is 00:39:17 And so, yeah, these can be many hundreds. And what I really like is that you can sort of see a ghostly evidence of them, can't you? Like from above, you can sort of see a ghostly evidence of them, can't you? Like from above, you can see it as like a slightly damp depression or a bit where crops don't grow as well because it's always been a bit too wet. The soils never dry down. And I think often farmers when they're expanding their land
Starting point is 00:39:37 rather than drain them, because that's a hassle draining a pond. They just dump a load of earth in them, wouldn't they, all out of plant matter, which doesn't stop them being wet. So they have left their little pond prints. That's cool. But also I think ponds they kind of have like a life duration, don't they? Okay. So like if you have a pond, like a pond farm, if you dig out a pond, right? Because you're a farmer. If you just leave it, after about
Starting point is 00:40:00 100 years, it'll just cease to be. Oh really? Yeah, they just kind of, they, they slowly silt up and silt up and silt up and then they die. And it could be just like one really heavy rain storm. Load of silt comes down, they're not upon them anymore. They're just like these ephemeral things that kind of come and go. They have to be kind of maintained, don't they?
Starting point is 00:40:17 A little bit. They do. When you clear out the leaves, and you know, if they've got trees over, then that's a nightmare for a pond apparently. Sure is. Can I tell you about the leaves that are fallen into my pond?
Starting point is 00:40:24 Yes. How many of you pond? Like the table that we're Can I tell you about the leaves that are fallen into my pond? Yes. How big is your pond? Like the table that we're recording. Okay, the one that no one can see. Yeah, it's about half the size of that. Oh. Okay, James are describing the size of a basin. It's small.
Starting point is 00:40:35 It's a small pond, but you know, it's just a pond. That's brilliant. It's just for animals to come and drink stuff. Okay. You're not going to get a deer, are you? You're not a lion kneeling down. I don't think, I don't think there will be will to beast of lion sipping my pond in North London. You're not that far from the zoo.
Starting point is 00:40:51 That's true. A catastrophic breakout. A tunnel. A jungle looks out. A whole group of holes. Humans make ponds. What else makes ponds? Aliens.
Starting point is 00:41:03 Yes. The equivalent of crop circles, pond circles. No, not human animals. Nonhuman animals. Yes. I reckon if you're a hippo and you sit down in some mud, you never know, create a pond. Good point, whether or not that would be intentional, I guess, would be debated. I'm saying deliberate pond makers. Oh, beavers, maybe. I guess they're damning things up. It's not really a pond.
Starting point is 00:41:29 It's not quite. No. So Andy, if you want to get a pond in your backyard, but you can't be bothered digging, by yourself, a Goliath frog. Oh, great. Yes. So Goliath frogs do this. It's a really interesting thing where they move rocks, giant rocks, basically their own weight and they get it so that they cut off water and they build their own pond so that
Starting point is 00:41:49 the eggs are more safe in there. They can keep attention to their make sure the tadpoles and so on are all in place. They're the biggest shrugs, aren't they? They are. They are. They are. For the people at home who can't see it, there's a glass of water in front of them. They're probably about two or three times bigger than that.
Starting point is 00:42:04 They're absolutely big. They're probably about two or three times bigger than that. Wow, they're absolutely big. And they think one of the, you know, there's always theories, but one of the theories is that their size is to do with mating, to do with the best rock movers, and you know, that's partially why they may be that big, specifically, because they build ponds. Do you know what else makes ponds? So this is a subset of humans.
Starting point is 00:42:21 Oh, okay, I was about to say elephant. So, school girls. A lot of sub-set of humans. That wasn't why I was thinking of. It's a, that can as a subset though. That's a subset of humans. Yeah, why? Did you make a question? Are you questioning whether they're humans? I wasn't sure what subset meant. I thought it meant it had to be like people from, you know, the southern hemisphere or like I thought it was bigger than just saying, you know, select not fans, you know, just a group of humans. A group of humans, we make fun of.
Starting point is 00:42:45 Why do you say so cool? You used to be a schoolgirl. I was trying to think of what a set was for humans would be. Okay, I just wanted to give when you were a schoolgirl, you dug ponds and that, you had inside knowledge. And then we got taken to ponds and we got told about you to say not to go back.
Starting point is 00:43:00 So, I'm not going to go back. So, set the humans who make ponds in profession. No, it's more of a ideology. Zen gardeners. Oh, okay, that is true. Undoubtedly, if you're not who I was thinking of. Communists. Oh, the opposite.
Starting point is 00:43:14 Oh, fascists. Nazis, yes you got it. Nazis. So, there's quite a lot of bomb craters around Europe. And if you drop a bomb, it makes a big indentation and that indentation can then collect water and become a pond. Wow, that feels like a silver lining. It is really, to possibly a reason to start more wars. No, I mean, just an answer to a pond making, right? The Allies were pond making
Starting point is 00:43:42 is what we were all pond making. A lot of ponds in Dresden probably. Right, right, right. But yeah, a lot of ponds made by both sides. And the thing is that they've done some studies on it and they did this in Hungary in particular. And they found that they found 274 species in ponds made by bombs. And they included, like for instance, an algae, which has previously only been found in Chilean salt lakes, and a furry shrimp that had only been recorded twice in the last 25 years in Hungary, and they were in these ponds made by bombs. I mean, this is what they find with these ghost ponds when they rejuvenate them.
Starting point is 00:44:20 You get species that you haven't seen for many, many years, and it's such a mystery, and I think, how stuff turns up how nature knows, and particularly, I think, in slightly bigger ponds than maybe James's garden pond, but you'll find, no offense. I can't even imagine a pond bigger than James's garden pond. Please don't write in for me taking the piss up, James, having a small pond, okay? You get... Okay, here we are. You know what this podcast does. Don't ride in.
Starting point is 00:44:46 LAUGHTER I was thinking Eel's. James Harkens podcast. Yeah. What's, come on, give us, you need a bit more detail, but I'm interested. Okay, first episode. Guess what leaves a pond in my pond. Are you having a guest to your pond each week?
Starting point is 00:45:03 Yeah, but they'll be allowed in also. They can't talk. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, It's never the world to be this guy. So I always love eels and puns, because how did they get there? Oh yeah. And what we know is that eels can move across sort of not dry land, but across land, that's moist, because they can breathe through their skin, not just gills, so gills require some pressure for the water to be forced in, but they can actually breathe through their skin.
Starting point is 00:45:41 So they must just flop out of a river, but then how do they find the way to someone's garden? I'm just looking at me just to say no eels in my pond. Oh, that'll be a big episode. All in my hovercraft. Yeah. I think it's the not an idea that sometimes things get impunz because they're dropped by birds.
Starting point is 00:45:57 There's an idea, yeah. Yeah, look at me that. Can I tell you about one of the most interesting ponds in the world? Please. This is called Don Juan Pond in Antarctica, and it's really weird. It's quite, it's very big. That's not the way I think.
Starting point is 00:46:10 It's full of water, that's not the way I think either. Well, it's in Antarctica, so being full of water is unusual. Exactly. That is the way I think, and it's because of what this water is like. It's really dense and really syrupy, and it's full of calcium chloride. It's kind of salt, right? And the water remains liquid, even 50 degrees below freezing.
Starting point is 00:46:30 Wow. 50 Celsius below zero. What's that all about? Well, it's because it's a most salty body of water in the world, isn't it? Exactly. And they don't know where the water comes from. I've written into you with a scientist who said, we've been studying it for 60 years. Wow.
Starting point is 00:46:44 We're pretty sure it's fed from me. But we're not totally certain. And what does amazing... What does the cold feel like if it's gone beyond the point of where it freezes into a block? Oh, I'm at a very cold. I bet. Yeah. You need a wet seat.
Starting point is 00:46:56 Well, let's say you're swimming in regular water. It freezes, right? So you can't dive into it. It's a nice block. You can't get in there, right? I know you mean, but you will have been outside in the air temperatures lower than zero. Yeah, but No, I'm just curious what like water just the feeling the sensation I'm really really cold. I think it's just the only way anyone can I don't think anyone but no one must have ever jumped into this pond because they would have died. There we go
Starting point is 00:47:20 Here's what's interesting about that thing is You would be able to lie down in there and read a newspaper like in the Dead Sea because it's so salty, I guess. Oh, because you float right on top of it. Yeah, yeah, you wouldn't sink. Could you concentrate on what you were reading for how fucking cold it is? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, would have been doing. That's some quick bites in the sun, it probably would be fine. You know, Vespasian, the Roman Emperor, he heard about the Dead Sea and he heard that people
Starting point is 00:47:52 just floating it, but he didn't believe it, and he didn't want to try it himself, so he just got prisoners thrown into it to see what would happen. Oh, wow. And they floated, yeah. Wow. I will say, in case you're just gonna book a trip that probably don't A right now, but B, in case you're gonna book a trip
Starting point is 00:48:08 to the Dead Sea to float, dispointing, add a sack. I was quite signature. I was quite start sank. You had a big lunch. Yeah. Good. Good. Stop the podcast!
Starting point is 00:48:28 Stop the podcast! Hey everyone, this week's episode of Fish is sponsored by Canva for Teams. Yes, Canva for Teams, that is a design platform that makes it very easy for anyone to create stunning content in any format. So if you want to make presentations, if you want to make. So if you want to make presentations, if you want to make documents, if you want to have a whiteboard where you can all throw around the best ideas,
Starting point is 00:48:50 brainstorm and collaborate in your Canva for Teams, you can do that, or you can print stuff out. So I know Andy has used Canva to print out lots of stuff. If you go to his house, there's just Andy Muggs everywhere, Andy Coasters, Andy Curtains, Andy Seal, everything's Andy. Yeah, it's a, it's wonderful. Don't let him be told any different.
Starting point is 00:49:12 Yeah, it's honestly an amazing place. You can get all the things that James just said. On top of that, they give you premium fonts, they have photos, graphics, a library that you can use. If you want to boost up the quality of all the presentations that you're doing, you can create engaging videos through them. It just makes the whole thing easier to make the aesthetic of what you're doing just premium quality. So if you would like to
Starting point is 00:49:34 get involved, try out Canva for Teams. All you need to do is head to canva.me slash fish. That's C-A-N-V-A dot M-E slash fish and you'll get a free 45 day extended trial. That's right. So, designed today, collaborate today with Canva for Teams by going to Canva.M-E slash fish and you can get your free 45 day extended trial there. On with the podcast. On with the podcast. On with the show. Okay, it is time for our final fact of the show, and that is James. Okay, my fact this week is that in 1912, the woman with the most perfect feet in America was divorced because her husband was jealous of all the attention she was getting. It's relatable.
Starting point is 00:50:27 I'm trying to say. Is that because you got such amazing feet? Or because you want to divorce your wife? I can't just say, Dave, this was an impossible fact to research. Yeah. When you Google nice feet or perfect feet in America, oh my goodness. There's a lot of stuff to get through first. Before you find out about...
Starting point is 00:50:46 Yeah, you have... Tell us about this woman. Well, she just had really nice feet. It was a stunts by the Caropodists of the USA to find the perfect foot. And they eventually managed to find it on the end of a lap. A woman called Miss Clara Smith Houston
Starting point is 00:51:03 who coincidentally was also a caropidist. Yeah. Anyway, so... Suspects, feels a bit rigged to me, didn't they? It does feel a bit rigged. I don't know, you might get into an industry because you'll feel so nice. People have complimented you, your whole life, you thought. Well, anyway, this story made it into some newspapers, just as the caropidists had hoped.
Starting point is 00:51:23 But the husband of Miss Smith Houston was not impressed and he sent her a telegram, like really divorced by text saying, friend, wife, not a great start. Congratulations on putting your best foot forward. Nice pun. Nothing like notoriety no matter how cheap. Oh, send your picture to the pink journals and call on me for cash with which to advertise yourself further, full stop, your husband full stop. And then Clara was later quoted in another newspaper saying that she decided if a man was so jealous, he would not even allow me to boast of a perfect foot, then I best give him up
Starting point is 00:52:01 and all the luxuries with which he provided me. Except the one thing, happiness. Yeah, here. Here, here, here. Glad to have you, Justin. I agree. Can I just, so his, his message, when he's saying, um, advertise yourself in a newspaper,
Starting point is 00:52:15 is he saying, because you're single now? What's that second with that lot of losing? I think it's, I think it's because it's, oh, you know, a foot person, are you? You know, you know, just sort of like trading on your feet. I think he was also implying that she was living off his money. And he was like, well, if you want more money, just to advertise yourself to the world for your awesome feet, then fine. Full stop.
Starting point is 00:52:34 Your husband full stop. That's a very full stop. So the question here is, what is the perfect foot? What did Clara have? And she had seven toes. Seven toes. Seven toes. Seven toes. Seven toes. Yeah, no rules.
Starting point is 00:52:45 You're having seven toes. So she had nine inches, they were nine inches long. Do you know what size that is though? I just know, I've just read it from this. So you've just written down nine inches, but you don't know how big or small that is. Because you need four of women's foot. Because actually, when he's down goes into the shoe shop
Starting point is 00:53:02 and he says, I reject your size, except for him. I'm going to get you an inches. You've worked it out. 256 barley cups, my good guy. I'd like a shoe that's about the size of a glass, which I drank from the other day. I want a shoe that doesn't fit in James's song. Well for the listener it's size 3.5 which is very small. And what is the why's it say in ten inches around the
Starting point is 00:53:35 in step? Yeah, circumference I suppose. Yes, okay, nice. So very very small feet, 3.5. I mean not three kissy-smole, but it's exactly one-seventh her height in accordance with the Greek rule of sculpture. Oh, that's interesting. Yeah. Okay. This is from the day book where this was all published, and it's amazing blog, by the way, that you found James. Yes. Second Glad's history, yeah, it's absolutely brilliant. And it was really nice, because they have the cuts of all the newspapers and stuff. Yeah, really cool. So I didn't have to go digging for the myself. And then they found that there was a new perfect foot found in 1916, which belonged to a nine-year-old girl called Mary Boca. This was found in Chicago and Mary's mum said, Mary had
Starting point is 00:54:20 very pretty feet when she was a baby. I felt nature's gift must not be mad. I began massaging her feet with cold cream to make them strong and smooth and rub them carefully to preserve the natural outline. And so her mum realised when she was really young that she had really nice feet and then put special stockings on her so that she didn't damage the feet and all that kind of stuff. It's like the Williams sister's down, isn't it? My brother made a Hollywood film about her in the 30s. I just don't get the whole feet thing. I know lots of people really like feet. 20% of men I believe, only 30% of straight men.
Starting point is 00:54:53 I think it was that. What do you mean? I feel like I... Fetishized. Right, okay. Because there's a website called WikiFeed. Oh yeah. It features a great number of feet.
Starting point is 00:55:04 Features greatly in your search history after this week. What does that now? Are there any three rules on Wiki Feet? Only five toes. That's right. The rules changed constantly. They're not daily. They're dating their feet. No, so you have to be, it's normally people posting pictures of women's feet. I don't think the men's section on wiki feet is enormous. It's sort of women over 17 who are listed on IMDB.
Starting point is 00:55:33 So you have to be in the public eye somehow. No copyright breaches and no adult content. But there are people who complain a lot. They get in rouse with each other on wiki feet. They'll post on a photo NFS which means no feet showing It's weird, but I think if it's if someone's where it like maybe if you've got a welley on I Think if you've got a welley on you're on the right side
Starting point is 00:55:57 My friend has a page. It's a mutual friend I won't say a name though because it is a bit of a weird site But um she has a page on there and it has ratings, so she has three out of five. Three! Yeah, which is, okay, you won't get in the Uber, would you? I think it's a bit, I mean, obviously it's pretty odd stuff. And I think you can, if you say, take my pictures off this website, they do. Yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:56:21 Yeah, they seem quite nice. There was a journalist you write for the, well, I read an article in the cut anyway, so she writes for the cut and all the things and she was going out with someone who said, hey, do you know you're on wiki feet? And she said, no, I don't. And so saw that she had indeed been uploaded, her feet had been uploaded
Starting point is 00:56:37 because they get it off like public Instagram pages, for instance, so there were pictures of her on the beach on Instagram and someone's taken her feet. And she, I mean, she said, okay, I'll get in touch. So she got in touch with the person. And so she interviewed this guy who posted her feet. And she was very fair. I have to say, and I thought he did seem a bit odd.
Starting point is 00:56:57 And she did say at one point, I've noticed that sometimes within 10 minutes of me posting an Instagram story that shows my feet, the screen shot is up on Wookiee feet. How does that happen? And he said, look, I don't just sit there looking for it. If I happen to see it and I like, I'll put it on there, but I'm not sitting there all day in staring. It's like it sort of started off quite nice. And then he obviously, you know, he kept on saying, what beautiful feet she had. I read an article that said that the incidence of fetishism increases as a response to epidemics
Starting point is 00:57:27 of sexually transmitted diseases in history. Interesting. This was a guy called Dr. James Giannini and his colleagues who did the study. And they look back as far back as a 12th century and they found that when there was a spike in STIs, people preferred feats, and it might have been that they were just less interested in penetrative sex because they might get, oh, so your feet are a bit safer to fancy.
Starting point is 00:57:51 I guess so. Yeah. Because, yes, it was a worse, you can get athletes from all over the country. Yeah. Athletes can't. Yeah. I think they went all the way up to the 80s,
Starting point is 00:58:01 and they found, even in the AIDS epidemic, that when that happened, then the numbers of foot-oriented and foot fetish pictures in kind of porn magazines and stuff, shot up there because, yeah, so preservation I guess, people are thinking, well, where else can I go? Can I tell you about Hogan Fukunaga? He was arrested in the year 2000. I know. Along with 11 acolytes.
Starting point is 00:58:22 That's a bad start, isn't it? When you and your acolytes. That's a bad start, isn't it? You were, you were an acolytes of impeachment. So he was the head of a cult in Japan, which offered followers an analysis of their spiritual and mental health entirely based on their toes. Right. So followers would pay 600 quid to have their feet stroked and then looked at by Mr. Fukunaga.
Starting point is 00:58:44 Concentrating adults? Concentrating adults. 600 quid to have their feet stroked and then looked at by Mr. Fukinago Consenting adults Consenting adults Consenting adults with more money than Sense and no Consenting adults with maybe too much money on their hands and who fell for the story that I can predict your future through your toes And they will always For the pedicure come fortune teller, right? Yeah, it's like cross my foot with silver
Starting point is 00:59:02 Look, you're come fortune teller, right? Yeah, it's like cross my foot with silver. Yeah, I do this. The predictions were all very, it's a suffering based, they predicted, oh, you'll die of a horrible disease, or you'll fall into debt, so that wasn't nice. And, but you can divert your problems if you sign up for one of our electric courses,
Starting point is 00:59:16 or if you buy a pinch of Buddha's ashes at a mere 120,000 pounds. Okay. They were running this call for about 15 years. They made 500 million quid out of it. pounds. Okay. They were running his cult for about 15 years. They made 500 million quid out of it. Wow. Yeah. And then he claimed later on that he had been simply obeying the voice of heaven, but that he had since forgotten what the voice had said. Ripper learned of people. I think so. It feels like in this cult being called the head of the operation
Starting point is 00:59:39 as the wrong title. That should be the junior role. You're right. Yeah, he was the big toe. When you have an enormous interest in feet, I believe it's called podophilia, which means there is a word that should be coined for people who have and have normal interest in podcasts. So when I have Harkins podcast, you might have and these podophile cast. No, I'm not.
Starting point is 01:00:02 Would you, would all your accolades be called Potter files? LAUGHTER No, you can get badges made. LAUGHTER I'm a Potter file. I shall give them more of a help to eight people. LAUGHTER LAUGHTER
Starting point is 01:00:18 Oh, god. No, but there should be a word for people who like podcasts lots. Because Potter file is taken by the feetpeg, right? Let's put them feet-of-files. Yes. We'll take their word back. But you know, there should be a word for people who like podcast lots, because PodifyL has taken by the feetpeat, right? Let's put them feet of files. Yes. We'll take their word back. But you know, there should be something on the file.
Starting point is 01:00:30 Audio file? That's good, but it's quite confusing, because it's also an audio file. Yeah. That's what makes it so fascinating. Sorry, it's actually better than a confusing, yeah. Yeah, that's right. So famous, famous names who love a foot,
Starting point is 01:00:45 include Elvis. What are we really doing? No, we're really doing. There's a lot of people who have admitted to loving feet and having been a feet. It's quite, it's just quite a turn for us, isn't it? Like celebrity toe suckers. Apparently, the podcast is now about. It was a story, but barely Elvis really loved it.
Starting point is 01:01:03 What's interesting is there is obviously quite a lot of famous stories about, you know, his henchmen would go out into a crowd after a gig. Catchment, and cut off the horse's feet. And they would bring them back to the volcano. Yeah. The Elvis had his grace land. His foot soldiers, yeah, they would go out. And they would, so, you know, go, you, you, do you want to come meet Elvis?
Starting point is 01:01:22 And obviously, it was, you know, it's a bring women backstage. And apparently they screened their feet. Is, is, what is awful? They're falling around on the floor and the gig. Just looking for feet. Exactly. It's just a story. I dropped an airing thing.
Starting point is 01:01:36 It was really most of them went to the gigs wearing shoes. How are they doing that? Don't, I, you know, it's just a rumor. What is just a rumor? We know that you love feet. And the story is, is that that was part of what, you know, it's just a rumor. What is just a rumor? We know that you love feet, and the story is, is that that was part of what, you know, the screening is what would go on. Okay, okay.
Starting point is 01:01:50 Okay. What are the stories? Can I steer us back towards Carver Waters, which I think about corns? You know, you get corns on your feet. Yeah, I can, can you, can they transfer to your feet? That's not true. I don't believe so. Cockhorn.
Starting point is 01:02:08 But they used to have street corn cutters, right? That was the thing. Oh, God, really? Yeah. I mean, it's sort of pretty, and it's, obviously, if you have corns, they're really painful. What would you do would it be like filing a nail? Like that kind of procedure.
Starting point is 01:02:21 Right. But the weird thing is, I just like this, I was on the blog Foot Talk, which is another great foot-based blog. I really recommend it. But there used to be jingles. They would advertise themselves by singing jingles in the streets. And the weird thing about this is that sometimes celebrity composers would write jingles for corn
Starting point is 01:02:39 cutters. Sorry. Yeah, yeah. Like how celebrity were you talking? Mozart's got his... Well, are they Berlin? I'm going to say the name Orlando Gibbons. Oh, yeah, like how celebrity we're talking Mozart's goddess. Well, they Berlin. I'm gonna say the name Orlando Gibbons Oh my god. Yeah, that's not all London way So he wow he was he was famous at the time
Starting point is 01:02:56 He you know, he was the organist at Westminster Abbey. He was eventually named virginalist to the king He was the list to the king. That was a skull he was kind of like. A virtual being kind of piano, obviously. Do you mean the song where? The jingle we had. I don't think we do. They're pretty sure that he came up with jingles for corn cutters. There's a kind of side line. I don't know if it was lucrative or fun thing to do. You guys have just reminded me, my me, my son, he used to love corn on the cob, but he always used to call it corn on the cock. That was the phrase that he used. Can I tell you something about horse's feet?
Starting point is 01:03:33 Yeah, which I love, is that horse's feet are always giving you a middle finger. One big middle finger. Every horse's hoof is what we call horses foot. It's just a big middle finger. And this is because they once had five toes on their feet, many, many, many years ago. They're actually kind of three of them still visible
Starting point is 01:03:52 because you've got two little vestigial ones if you know horse's legs, they're kind of a bit out the leg. But the hoof is just the middle finger. And there's actually a biologist called Catherine Cavanae who recently was sorting through preserved horse embryos for reasons she didn't go into. And she saw that in the very, very early days of horse gestation, they have five fingers on each foot.
Starting point is 01:04:15 Wow. And then you see it in the settles, and it's like they're about to grow, and then they decide not to grow, because they've evolved out of it. So let me ask you this, if a horse with five toes rocks up to the grand national, are there regulations to say? Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. No rules, no rules, and it's five times faster. Yeah, ridden by a crocodile.
Starting point is 01:04:32 LAUGHTER You know that the women of Chicago have been famous throughout America for abnormally sized feet. Big or small? Big. Oh, OK. In the early 20th century. So this perfect foot, the second one was in Chicago.
Starting point is 01:04:49 And everyone was surprised because people in Chicago usually have massive feet. What am I going to appreciate? It's amazing. And I looked in the newspaper archives and sure enough, if you look, like before, you know, the 20s and search for big feet Chicago, there's all these articles that go, yeah,
Starting point is 01:05:02 they all got big feet. And then you get people in Chicago saying, yeah, we do have big feet, but actually that also means we have big intellect. Wow. Sure it does. Is it just the women or is it the piece of the Chicago? It's just the women of Chicago. Is it so that they can like walk out over the Great Lakes and distribute their weight better? Oh, that would be good. Yeah. I thought maybe because it's the windy city, isn't it? And it would help you not to get blown over. Great shout. Yeah. It's a car. All these uses. That's the last evolution.
Starting point is 01:05:27 That is such funny. Is there any evidence behind it? Is it a car? No, I can't be true. I mean, I'll be honest. I haven't got Sishikago. I've measured all the way to the speed. But it can't be.
Starting point is 01:05:36 Get Elvis' henchmen's good. LAUGHTER OK, that's it. That is all of our facts. Thank you so much for listening. If you'd like to get in contact with any of us about the things that we've said over the course of this podcast, we can all be found on our social media accounts. I'm on Instagram on at Shribaland James. My Instagram is nosy fingers James Harkin. Andy, I'm on Twitter and now Blue Sky, Andrew Hunter Web. Yeah, and if you want to get in contact with us as a group, Anna, where did they go? You can go to atnosuchthing on Twitter or you can email podcast at qi.com. That's right. You can also go to our website, nosuchthingasafish.com. All of our previous episodes are up there. If you'd like to check them out, there's also some merch and lots of other fun things. Do check it out, but otherwise just come back here. We'll be back again with another episode and we'll see you then.
Starting point is 01:06:31 Goodbye. you

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