No Such Thing As A Fish - No Such Thing As A Squilkman

Episode Date: February 22, 2019

Dan, James, Anna and Andrew discuss kissing hedgehogs, the time on Saturn, and competitive ploughing. ...

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:02 Welcome to another episode of No Such Thing as a Fish, a weekly podcast coming to you from the QI offices in Covent Garden. My name is Dan Schreiber. I am sitting here with Andrew Hunton Murray, Anna Chisinski, and James Harkin, and once again we have gathered round the microphones with our four favorite facts from the last seven days. And in no particular order, here we go. Starting with you, Andy. My fact is that in the 19th century Champion plowers were traded like Premier League footballers I don't know how exactly like Premier League footballers it was It wasn't for like 10 million pounds
Starting point is 00:00:51 No exactly I think the sums were a bit lower But there was a big thing where there were lots of ploughing competitions In the 19th century where you had to plough up and down a field And there are all these metrics in ploughing about whether you're doing it right or wrong And squires who had lots of plowmen would kind of pick them against each other and then the winners would win a year's wages and then they might be transferred for a fee can i just can i ask what a squire is because i associate that with king arthur times and this is the 19th century probably where it started yeah so that's a kind of assistant
Starting point is 00:01:23 to a nobleman isn't it okay but in the later times it's more of a kind of junior aristocrat sort of a slight landowner okay yeah so for example you get the word squirearchy which is a word for quite affluent families from the country is it's not a very common word i think do you get the word don't use it casually in pub conversation here's a less common word i think he used to get a squish which is someone who is a squire and a bishop that's great oh wow again don't use that in normal conversation but that is that do they just do that like squawkman who delivers the milk but also as a squire is that just applies smashing the words um so it was landowners and they were would have these competitions so that their land got plowed, basically.
Starting point is 00:02:11 And so, like, for instance, the first one ever in Kent was in 1867, or the first big one in Kent. And that was run by a guy called Mr. Hart Dyke, who owned a massive amount of land in Kent, and who then later had children, who had children, who had children who had Miranda from the TV. Miranda Ward. Oh, wow. Wow. And Tom Hart Dyke, who we know. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:35 Oh, who he? He was, he's still, he works in, in agriculture to an extent. He plants things. Yeah, so there's a massive garden in Kent, which he runs from his ancestral hone, which was where this plowing competition took place. Wow, is it? That's so cool. He got on the side note, he got, he was famous for being stolen or kidnapped by guerrillas out in the Dorian gap.
Starting point is 00:02:58 And they held them for months and they let him go finally. And then he went back to get directions. And while he was kept by the. guerrillas, they, um, or the gorillas he, um, like, I kind of, you can't say it. You can't say it. Although Dan pronounced it so profoundly like the word guerrillas. It was like you were emphasizing in O. Garrier.
Starting point is 00:03:19 It was important that you clarify. I'm slowly realizing we're talking about humans and not actual guerrillas. It's it humans that took him. Yeah. So while he was, um, kidnapped by these fighters, um, he kept like a little garden, didn't he where he was kept and like he would ask them for plants and stuff like that to kind of keep him same. A squirrelilla is someone who's a squire
Starting point is 00:03:36 And a guerrilla I should say that the way this comes from Because it's a really good story It's a Guardian long read on the World Plowing Championship And it's an incredible read It's 5,000 words of ploughing action And it's so good So there are all these things you have to do right
Starting point is 00:03:54 Basically you have to plough up and down And ploughing, we should just say what it is It's turning soil upside down Basically So you're inverting it Which means that you're bringing nutrients to the surface and you're plowing weeds and other plants back into the earth so they break down and they feed the soil. So the aim is that you've prepared a field for planting.
Starting point is 00:04:14 Yeah, that's what ploughing is. Yeah. But I mean, is it necessary? Maybe we'll come on to that later. Yeah. What? Flowing is very controversial in this day and age. Is it? Yeah. Because it kills the soil. Yeah. Ruins farms. And we've been doing it for thousands of years. And now people have suddenly started doing this thing called till-free farming or no. till farming where they've realized you can just spread the seeds on unplowed land and they can actually get better yields. Not having it, but they don't ruin the land. It's a thing.
Starting point is 00:04:44 This is why they've been doing it in South America for years because their land isn't as robust as ours. And so they've realized that it's been really drying it out and wring the nutrients because the idea is that we suddenly disturb this massive ecosystem with this plow. You dig down. You wrench up all these insects and stuff and you plot them on top and they don't know what they're doing. Well, it's an argument.
Starting point is 00:05:03 But the experiments are happening, and they're getting kind of similar-ish results to ploughed fields. So there might be something in it. I mean, imagine if it turned out plowing had been totally pointless all of these years. Wow, I mean, it hasn't been. There's been these amazing competitions going on if you think about it. And it's still, and it's what they say it's the biggest event in Europe, the one that happens in in Ireland, the outdoor event.
Starting point is 00:05:25 In 2017, 291,000 people went along to the plowing competition. I read an article about it. said that two-thirds of the attendees have absolutely no interest in agriculture whatsoever. What are they there for? It's because it's a huge event. You know, when you sometimes go to a village show because you're a bit bored of a Saturday, it's like a massive version of that. It's like a festival kind of thing, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:05:45 And that attendance is twice as much as Glastonbury. Here are some of the things that you can actually see at it. So outside of the ploughing, there's a robotic milking machine that milks 40 cows, so you can watch that. There's a pestiront, which serves mealworms and crickets, local locusts. Tractor football. So that's one of the new championships. Cool. Yeah. So it's teams of tractors push a giant football around the field. Oh, giant one. Cool. Yeah. And then they say there's the RTE tent where they have a very famous commentator slash news broadcaster called Marty Morrissey and you can meet him. And then they say in brackets or his cardboard cutout. Yeah, it's a massive deal. And the same person has been the head of the National Plaring Association, which is the organization that runs in.
Starting point is 00:06:32 for 68 years now. This is an 85-year-old woman called Anna Mae McHugh who I think is a bit of a legend there basically. And so it's quite impressive that she's a woman because only about 2% of plows who enter these contests are women. And she said, I was reading an interview with her and she was saying that there's this contest
Starting point is 00:06:50 for farmer rats, which are the female farmers. And they sort of compete over who's going to be queen of the plow. And it used to be that the queen of the plow, if you won that title at the contest, you were given a hundred pound dowry as long as you were married by the age of 25. Yeah, that's good. Right on, sister. Actually, on that, the first Farmac competition was in 1954. That was the first time they allowed women in.
Starting point is 00:07:17 And not many people were happy about it. Some people said it was introducing Hollywood Rasmataz at its worst. Sounds like it. They weren't introducing May West in or anything like that. I also said that you were allowed to enter it. If it was open, this is from, I should say, this is from Andy's article, not your article, but the one that you forwarded to us, which as Andy says is fantastic. And it said the Farmac class was open to girls and women that were single, married or widowed.
Starting point is 00:07:47 Which are the three, I guess, options of life generally? But not divorced. Yeah, not divorced. Get right out of here. You might be right. So just while we're on plowing and sexism, there is a really interesting. theory that plowing created sexism in the first place. Strap in. It's so good.
Starting point is 00:08:04 I wonder why you were so against plowing at it. So plowing is invented with agriculture about roughly 10,000 years ago, 10 to 8. And the original plows were called scratch plows. So they don't turn the soil over. They just literally dig a little trench through it. And you don't need too much strength to do it. But you do need quite a lot of upper body strength to do that. And before that, lots of women have been in charge of,
Starting point is 00:08:29 fields and cereal growing because they were using hose. And then, when plowing is invented, and I mean hose, bronsmoking, hoses, and I wrote the subject of sexism, I thought you've got nature you use to plant crops. Okay. Do you think that's where the phrase grows before hose comes from? But then, when plowing is invented, suddenly the men were in charge, and in Mesopotamia, there's this flip from mother goddesses to male gods.
Starting point is 00:08:58 and this is the really weird thing, it still happens today, as in the effects might still be being felled. So women descended from plow-using societies are much less likely to work outside the home or BMPs or run businesses, whereas in countries like Rwanda and Botswana and Madagascar, which are mostly ho-using places, and everyone's giggling again, but in those countries, women are much likely to be in the labour force. But what's the reason that it drove women out?
Starting point is 00:09:26 Is it the weight of the plow? So it was when people had to pull the plough or direct the animals. Exactly. The first world plough champion was a guy called Jim Eccles from Ontario. And the only write-up I could find said that he was so shy he only entered because his friends talked him into it. And the second champion was Hugh Barr of Antrim. And Eccles only came eighth in this competition because, according to the article I read, he had the bad luck of drawing a plot with a bump in it.
Starting point is 00:09:54 Oh. So it's all down to how lucky you were with your little bit of feel. Well, it's about how you deal with these obstacles, you know. It's true. And all the international competitors in that second one, which was in Ireland, hated it because they had stony fields in Ireland, and you didn't get stony fields anywhere else around the world. So you have to clear the stones out of the way, I think, before you start.
Starting point is 00:10:12 So Richard Herring, whose new podcast is about him clearing stones from fields. Is he secretly training for the next international... I think he might be. Cloud Championships, my God. Okay, it is time for fact number two, and that is James. Okay, my fact this week is that the amazing. American Centre for Disease Control has warned against kissing hedgehogs. How come?
Starting point is 00:10:38 Because they can give you illness. They can give you salmonella specifically. And there have been 11 in January, they said that there have been 11 people in eight states who have got a strain of salmonella. And in 10 of the 11 cases, the people had reported recent contact with a hedgehog. It's too much to be coincidence. It's too much. It's too much. I can only think that the 11th person is lying. This happened in Missouri and Minnesota, in Colorado, Maine, Mississippi, Nebraska, Texas, and Wyoming.
Starting point is 00:11:11 And we already knew that hedgehogs can give you salmonella, but it seems like it's a particularly bad strain at the moment in America. It's so widely spread across all the different states that it makes you think as though each state has one person and they all know each other and they just have a hedgehog kissing club. And they're just like sending videos around to each other. Could be that, or it could be just one widely traveled hedgehog. He's just going around attacking people. Is it French kissing that they're doing with their hedgehogs, or is it just cuddling? It doesn't specify, but I think it's nuzzling. Okay.
Starting point is 00:11:42 Right. If you imagine, like, you could do that. Yeah. If you're a small child with a hedgehog, wouldn't you? If I had a pet hedgehog, I would definitely kiss it at some point. Would you? Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:11:52 I get attached. That's nice. It's airborne, right? So they don't even have to have snogs it. Some hedgehog owners might have just been near it and it's got in the dust between the hedgehog and the person. It can do, but it dies quite quickly in the air, I think. Maybe you hold the hedgehog and then you put it down and you suck your finger
Starting point is 00:12:09 for whatever reason you like. Suck your finger for any reason. Although you shouldn't, incidentally, while we're on giving advice about what to do with hedgehogs, you shouldn't have sex with them because in 2007, a Serbian man needed emergency surgery after he had sex with a hedgehog on a witch doctor's advice. She told him it would cure his premature ejaculation. And it actually just left him severely lacerated because they're covered in needles.
Starting point is 00:12:40 Anywho, sorry, salmonella. Yes, so other animals in the US that can give you salmonella or that have given people salmonella in the last few years include chickens, ducklings, guinea pigs, frogs, turtles, geckos, and bearded dragons. as have all given people salmonella recently all from kissing or from I don't know I don't know what kind of
Starting point is 00:13:02 eating undercooked bearded dragons you know when you eat a slightly undercooked bearded dragons you often feel sick afterwards A turtle was in that list and I was reading a story of in China there was a man who made the news not too long ago because he decided to get rid of his pet turtle so he was releasing it back into the wild
Starting point is 00:13:18 and as he did so he decided to give it a goodbye kiss but unfortunately it was a snapping turtle and it grabbed onto his lower lip and refused to let go. And you can see video footage of his face, which does not look good. Basically, it kind of locked on and didn't come off. Yeah, so don't kiss turtles. I think just don't kiss other animals. That's fair enough, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:13:40 Well, there's a study, I think it was in 2015, and it was analyzing, you know how people kiss their dogs. Yeah, I mean, I include that in animals. Yeah, no, you're right, too. But it was at the University of Arizona, and they were trying to find out whether the microbes in dog guts might be good for humans. Okay. And whether they might actually, it's like having a probiotic yogurt, basically, kissing a dog. Right.
Starting point is 00:14:05 It is not as delicious. But this is really weird. Dogs and their owners end up having very similar gut bacteria. So you end up with the same kind of microbiome. And so the study was pairing people with dogs for three months and testing them. to see if there was any change. Yeah. So does that mean it's a good idea to kiss your dog
Starting point is 00:14:26 because at least that you won't get strange bacteria or it's kind of pointless actually because you're not getting any new bacteria you didn't have already. I think they were saying it could have good effects but also obviously it could have bad effects because... What are you for a piece of advice? It probably means if you have your dog's bacteria in your stomach then it would be easier for you to digest dog food.
Starting point is 00:14:48 Yeah. Come Brexit? We can all get out the pedigree chum. Do you guys know the, what do you think is the food stuff that most commonly gives people salmonella? Chicken. Eggs. In correct. Salmon.
Starting point is 00:15:06 Salmon. I used to think that. I used to think salmon. Really? I was sorry. It was just found by a guy called salmon. Salmon. Is it salad or something?
Starting point is 00:15:15 It is, yeah. It's leafy greens. So I didn't know this. We don't give them enough. stick. Its cucumber and melon are responsible for are responsible for 20% of cases of salmonella, whereas chicken is only 19. Oh, what a state of enormous difference. Hey, it just overtook it at the last minute.
Starting point is 00:15:33 I'm immediately going to go home, throw away the melons and replace them with raw chickens. Anyway, this is true and generally meat, so chicken, beef and pork account for 33% of salmonella poisonings, whereas leafy greens, again, a huge lead with 35%. and so we never talk about that and I think the salmonella you get from salmon you get from the meats can be a more virulent strain so it produces the most deaths
Starting point is 00:15:58 but really avoid salad I think is the next piece of advice. I think that's good advice. You said that it was discovered by Mr Salmon actually discovered by his assistant Theobald Smith Daniel Salmon was the other guy
Starting point is 00:16:12 and Theobald Smith was also the first person to discover that ticks could spread disease and he also discovered anaphylaxis. Did he know? Yes, he's quite a big deal. That is a big deal. It feels like he didn't get the credit he deserved there.
Starting point is 00:16:25 No. Smith and Ella is probably a hard word to say. You're right. Anaphaxis is sometimes called the Theobald Smith phenomenon. But again, don't use that in conversation because people have no idea what you're talking about. I think if you're ringing 999, when someone's having anaphylactic shock,
Starting point is 00:16:42 don't say he's suffering the Theobald Smith phenomenon to sound clever. Um, hedgehogs? Yeah? Yeah. There was a tradition in the Victorian times of having a hedgehog in your kitchen to go around eating insects. Oh, wow. Hedgehog seemed to make quite fun pets for some people.
Starting point is 00:16:58 So they love running in their wheels. Didn't know. They love running in their wheels more than anything. So like a hamster, but more enthusiastic. And I was on these sites which were saying, which were giving advice about how to keep hedgehogs. They were saying you've got to take the wheel away as soon as the hedgehog gets pregnant because they love the wheel so much that they'll keep running while they give birth, for instance. They'll often then trample down the thing they've just given birth to because they'll keep running.
Starting point is 00:17:21 No way. They won't look after their babies because they're too busy running in the wheel. And sometimes they pick up the little hoglets. So that's what you call the little hedgehogs in their mouth to take them onto the wheel. So at least they're with them. But then they'll just run over them. It's like heroin. It's like heroin.
Starting point is 00:17:34 It's like hedgehog heroin. That's another thing you shouldn't indulge them while pregnant, I believe. Special advice. That's amazing. That's incredible. Yeah. During pregnancy. They have very loud sex, hedgehog.
Starting point is 00:17:47 Do they? Yep, very loud sex. Especially if they're sleeping with a man from Serbia. Oh, for God's sake, already! But they do have loud sex, even when having sex with each other. And there was a man in Germany who called police once. He was in his apartment, and he was reporting heavy panting happening under the common stairwell in his house.
Starting point is 00:18:08 So we called the police saying, can you stop these heavy panters? And the police came around, and they just found two mating hedgehogs under the stairs. And as the police spokesperson said, we just found two hedgehogs loudly engaged in ensuring the continuity of their species. And so they left them into it. Because they last a long time, which is why they were still doing it when the police came around. They can go on for hours. Which again, I guess, is why they particularly believe in this poor Saturday. Okay, it's time for fact number three.
Starting point is 00:18:42 And that is my fact. My fact is scientists have finally worked out what time it is on Saturn. And what time is it? It's, well, yeah, we don't know. We know how long... We know how long... I can't tell you exactly right now what time it is on Saturn. I can tell you how long a day is on Saturn, and that's what they've worked out.
Starting point is 00:19:02 It's 10 hours, 33 minutes, and 38 seconds. Now this is new from what we thought decades ago, up by, as the article says, several minutes. So, it's a very interesting reason of how they found it out. So Cassini, which was the spacecraft, which has been taking all the images that we have as Saturn. It was an incredible mission that has ended now. I believe that the Cassini is actually burnt up into Saturn's atmosphere now. But everyone was looking for how long it took to rotate via looking at the planet. And there was a student of astronomy at UC Santa Cruz who started looking at the data about the rings of Saturn.
Starting point is 00:19:40 And what they noticed that the rings themselves started taking impressions of them, kind of like how if you were having a earthquake on Earth, you could use seismology to work out how strong. it was, say, they were noticing that a similar thing was going on with the core of Saturn that was releasing certain seismological waves that were being recorded in the rings. So what the guy did was he made a simulation of how fast the core would be turning by using the waves that were imprinted on the ring on a computer simulation and by doing that was able to match it up with what the spin would be and that came out at 10 hours, 33 minutes and 38 seconds. When they discovered the rings, it was a pretty confusing episode.
Starting point is 00:20:21 So Galileo, the first person to observe the rings and describe them. Poor guy, this is in 1610, and he saw it with a telescope, and he sent this cryptic message to Kepler saying, I've seen the highest tri-form planet, and Kepler told King Rudolph, and Rudolph said, what the hell are you on about Galileo? And Galileo said, I think it's three planets side by side, because he was sort of seeing it as three. But then, so he wanted to have another look at it. So he waited a couple of years for some reason. and then after a couple of years,
Starting point is 00:20:49 what he didn't realize was that he was observing them at the Saturn ring plane crossing. So that is when Earth crosses into the exact plane of Saturn's rings. So it happens about once every 13 to 15 years. And at that point, because they're so flat, if you're looking at them face on, you can't see anything. So they completely disappear.
Starting point is 00:21:08 So Galileo looked, they'd totally gone. And he was really freaked out. He said, I have no idea what's gone on them. So sorry, it seems like I've lied. That's bad luck. It's really bad luck. How often does that happen? Every 13 to 15 years.
Starting point is 00:21:18 God, so it's the same thing of that timing, you know. If we didn't look again, we would assume that it didn't have it, but it was just that little blip where suddenly it just doesn't to us. And then he saw them again a bit later. Oh, yeah, yeah, the second check. How did you know it was the same one? I would have thought I've just seen a different one. A different planet?
Starting point is 00:21:35 Yeah. I guess you, I guess that's what astronomers do for living, isn't it? They could predict where the planets were going to be. They knew which was which. Yeah. He was a smart guy, Andy. Okay, well. It's not that you're not, but probably in different ways.
Starting point is 00:21:48 Yeah, I would like to see him improvising the Jay Dustin play. I think we all would actually love to see it. Amazing. I'd actually go and see it. But the rings of Saturn, they're 180,000 miles wide, and they're only 300 feet high. Yeah. That's crazy, isn't it? They're 400 kilometres wide, like, the actual ring bit there, so they're that many miles across.
Starting point is 00:22:12 Around the, from one end of the ring to the very first. furthest on the other side of the planet. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, they are incredibly flat. I think someone worked out that if they were the equivalent of paper, so if they were the thickness of paper, then you'd need a sheet of paper that was 1.7 miles across. Wow. That's the equivalent. There's a theory that I just saw in the new scientist this afternoon which says that the planet Pluto might be a billion comets squished together. That's how all the planets are really, aren't they? They're just bits of rock and dust
Starting point is 00:22:43 squish together? I guess so. I think there was an alternative theory. but I literally just saw it as we sat down. So even Saturn began as a pebble. Just begins as a pebble going around and then another pebble squashes into it. And then bigger pebbles, bigger pebbles. Eventually you've got Saturn. That's quite, that's such a nice fable.
Starting point is 00:23:01 You'll make a great dad, James. Your kids feeling a bit small. You can always say even Saturn was once a pebble. That's great. And look at him now. Look at him now. Or her. Did you guys know, just speaking of sort of time and space,
Starting point is 00:23:14 that there are two different. days on earth. We have two different days. There are seven in a week. Oh my God, I've been saying that all wrong. Oh my God, what's after Tuesday? It's not Monday again. It's embarrassing. There are two different types of day on Earth. So there's a solar day, which is the one that we know, which is the 24 hour day. But actually, the more legit day. So if I asked you, what is the definition of a solar day? How quickly we should. spin round. Yeah. How many degrees have you spun around? Yeah, 360. Incorrect. It's actually a tiny bit more than 360.
Starting point is 00:23:53 So a sedereal day is 23 hours and 56 minutes. And that's how quickly the earth does one rotation of 360 degrees. But actually, because we are also rotating around the sun, every time the earth rotates, in order to get from midday, one day, to exactly midday the other, it needs to spin that tiny bit more because you've moved around a bit more. So our 24 hour day is actually you're spinning. around a bit more than 360 degrees. And I didn't know that.
Starting point is 00:24:19 Wow. And how does that affect our working life and pay and stuff? Well, so I think what you can say is actually the day is four minutes shorter than you thought. So you can go home from work four minutes earlier than you planned. Great. It's going to change your life. Let's do it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:34 Finish now. We'll just stop this podcast four minutes before the end. Yeah. So do you know how long a day is on the sun? how long it takes the sun to rotate once on its axis as opposed to when it's light which is all the time it's 24.5 earth days on the equator but 34 earth days at the poles and this is always a problem isn't it because they're big gas things
Starting point is 00:25:00 and things are spinning at different speeds so if you're on a holiday you would have your holiday at the pole of the sun because you get longer still hot this time of year I don't know if you want longer I think you want to shorten that holiday as much as possible if you're holidaying on the sun, don't you? Well, unless you've got very good... Good factor. Good factor sun cream.
Starting point is 00:25:18 Yeah, okay. That's amazing, though. It has two different days or three. Endless different days. Okay. Yep. So Saturn, Saturn is a god in Roman mythology, right? So there's also Jupiter, all the planets are gods, basically. Not Earth.
Starting point is 00:25:33 Apart from Earth. All the... Unless you count Gaia, who's a Greek goddess. But... Jupiter's the fifth planet, then there's Saturn the sixth, Jupiter's father is Saturn, right? Right. And then the next planet is Uranus, and Uranus is the father of Saturn.
Starting point is 00:25:53 So Jupiter, next planet, father, next planet, father again. So the solar system is basically a big, who do you think you are? Yeah. In some traditions, Mars, the fourth planet, is the son of Jupiter. So, yeah, it's like a family tree going outwards. That's a way you can remember. And so is Uranus's father Neptune? I think we didn't know about Neptune.
Starting point is 00:26:15 And the father of all the gods is that cartoon dog. That is really cool. That's really cool. Yeah, it's Pluto knocked out because that just didn't work for the system. It actually is a planet, but they're like, no, no, no. Okay, it is time for our final fact of the show, and that is Chazinski. My fact is that the first ever blood transfusion to be a scientifically recorded, used a goose quilt
Starting point is 00:26:45 to connect an artery in the neck of one dog to the jugular vein in the neck of another. And it was successful. The dog was okay. One of the dogs was okay. It was half a success. Well, the dog was okay that they wanted to be okay. The dog that was receiving blood?
Starting point is 00:27:00 Exactly. So it's actually quite mean. This was done in 1666 by a guy called Richard Lauer, or Lauer, who was from Cornwall, and he traveled up to the Royal Society in London and did it in front of an audience and he apparently got a medium-sized dog. I don't know why the size was that relevant, but he severed its jugular and bled it until it was approaching death and then thought, okay, cool, now we can see if we can save this dog. And he did that by then sort of severing the artery of a secondary dog, attaching a quill between the two and siphoning the blood from the secondary
Starting point is 00:27:31 dog into the next one. But then you need a third dog to save the second dog and they called that day the massacre of 500 dogs. No, it would only ever be the massacre of one It's only ever the last dog on the conglom that dies But could you not put it in like a circle So that everyone gets everyone else's Oh yeah, wow He should have done that
Starting point is 00:27:49 I don't know why he didn't do two goose quills And swap them But no, he didn't, he just bled the second coil At the back end of the dog, couldn't you? One in the neck of the dog And one in the neck of the dog And then it works like that, doesn't it? And then you get the blood just going around
Starting point is 00:28:02 You know, you've got two hearts You've got two circulatory systems Yeah, just like a circuit I know the blood doesn't go for the head to the bum bother the fact it. Yeah, I think that would work. Yeah. It said the transfusion came to an end
Starting point is 00:28:16 when the emittant dog, which is the one who gave the blood, began to cry and faint and fall into convulsions and at last die. Oh. Yeah, they weren't, their animal rights weren't as strong in the olden place. But it was successful, which is kind of weird,
Starting point is 00:28:31 actually, because just like humans, really, when you're doing blood transfusions in pets, it's good to have the same blood type. I think dogs have the same blood type. I know cats have A, A, B and B. Yeah, I think they're different A's and B's, aren't they? As in they're different proteins on the... Oh, are they?
Starting point is 00:28:47 I believe so, yeah. But hang on, would a... I've never considered that. Would a Great Dane have different types of blood to a Scotty? No, because they're all same species. So all dogs. So all dogs can give blood to all other dogs. Wow. But I'm a feeling they can't give it to humans because of the antigens on the...
Starting point is 00:29:03 Yes, although I didn't know they could give it to all other dogs. I think so. It's the same species, isn't it? It's just different. Yeah, but all humans can't give blood to all other humans. Oh, sorry. No, yeah, you're right. Yeah, so it's the same as humans.
Starting point is 00:29:13 So a Taipei Scotty and a Taipei Shalzer. Yes, that would be. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you're a bird, any kind of bird, then you can have a transfusion from any other kind of bird. Wow. So a robbing could donate to an ostrich, but you'd need quite a lot of robins. That's incredible. So donating blood between animals, they started, you know, injecting blood from.
Starting point is 00:29:38 from, let's say, a calf into a person. That was a year later after this first experiment, and he died. So it was banned for a long time. The person died. But there was this weird rash of cases in the mid-19th century where doctors just started saying, well, milk will probably work just as well
Starting point is 00:29:54 and putting milk into people's bloodstreams directly. Yeah. They thought, because it's got these little oily droplets and fatty droplets, they thought, well, they might turn into white blood cells. And they just, there were two doctors called Bovill and Hodder. And this is all from, I found this journal called Transfusion, and this is the 1969 edition, but they wrote up the whole thing. And their first patient was said to respond dramatically to 12 ounces of cow's milk.
Starting point is 00:30:20 But two of the patients who they transfuse the following week died, and people kept dying as well. Well, they say respond dramatically. It's not actually clear. And it happened for 25 years at least that people were just putting milk into blood. Well, that's how they started doing it even in the 17th century. So Christopher Rendered a lot of this, bizarrely, before he got into building cathedrals. But he was involved with Richard Lau with his first transfusion. And he used to inject dogs with water, milk, beer, wine and opium to see if any of them worked as blood transfusions.
Starting point is 00:30:54 He once said, I have injected wine and ale into a living dog into the mass of blood by a vein in good quantities, till I have made him extremely drunk. But soon after, he pisseth it out. but also the idea of putting animal blood into humans there was a big theological debate about what you would be doing if you were putting foreign blood into someone else's body because supposedly the soul would be contained inside some of that blood so you're altering the whole person so what they used to plan out was if they were going for someone who was a bit wild they would get sheep's blood because that was a calm nurturing jesus like animal
Starting point is 00:31:30 that would then give a sort of balance of a soul to this wild character equally if they had someone who was very shy they might adopt an animal that had a bit more of a wild attitude and the idea was to inject them with that blood yeah um although a so sheep a jesus like lamb lamb of god okay yeah yeah yeah samarities there's a weird thing this is so on just taking blood and putting it into other people um we said before you know the secret service in america they have several pints of the president's blood type yeah in his car which is pretty cool but I read this piece in the Atlantic about how the Secret Service was protecting
Starting point is 00:32:08 Barack Obama's DNA because, you know, we all shed millions of cells a day. So the DNA is intact. So if you, let's say the president shook hands with you and you got a few live cells or he sneezed and he threw away the tissue. You could make, you can now make
Starting point is 00:32:23 cells into other cell types. So you could make synthetic sperm cells from the president's sneeze in a tissue and then you can, you know, they can't fertilized eggs with them, but you could say, oh, look, we've got evidence of this. So they could, what they thought is they might clone Barack Obama. I think it's not exactly that you'd make another president.
Starting point is 00:32:45 Why do you want another, why do you want another one? Who doesn't want another Barack Obama? At this stage, I'll take a sterile sperm cell of Barack Obama as president of America. But you could, so you could fabricate evidence of an affair or you can, or, for example, you can analyse the genetic markers of diseases. You could say, well, he's more prone to Alzheimer's or to this heart disease and you could cast doubt on their legitimacy that way. You could prove that he was born in Africa. Yeah. You could. Yeah. So this is a real problem.
Starting point is 00:33:16 So do they presumably have Trump's DNA as well? I think a lot of people have Trump's DNA. In Japan, blood type is a super important thing, isn't it? I don't think we've mentioned before, I think we've done it on QI, but. It's on job applications and stuff. It's thought to be so related to who you are and what you're like. Kind of like how we see maybe star signs, but much more believed in and invested in. And yeah, you'll have to say on your application what blood type you are.
Starting point is 00:33:44 But I mean, saying horoscopes, in the morning TV shows in Japan, they have the blood type horoscopes. They do do that. That's so weird. Yeah. And on Asian countries on their Facebook profiles, that tends to be a thing in you're about. You would have your blood type in there. tells you a lot about who you are for a potential, you know. I didn't even know what my blood type was until earlier this year.
Starting point is 00:34:07 That's weird, isn't it? I still don't know, actually. I don't know. I always call my mum whenever I need to know it. She knows it. Well, she's very deaf, though, so she always says, A? She says, I need to know my blood type. Oh!
Starting point is 00:34:24 A B! Thanks, Mom. A, B. Okay. That's it. That is all of our facts. Thank you so much for listening. If you'd like to get in contact with any of us about the things that we have said over the course of this podcast, we can be found on our Twitter accounts. I'm on at Shriverland, Andy, at Andrew Hunter, James, at James Harkin. And Anna. You can email a podcast at QI.com. Yep. Or you can go to our group account at no such thing or our website. No Such Thing as a Fish.com. We have all of our previous episodes up there. We also have a page of links to all the tour dates that we're going to be playing in the next few months. And look out for some European ones. Very exciting. We're going to a place called Europe. Okay, we'll be back again next week with another episode. We'll see you then.
Starting point is 00:35:10 Goodbye.

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