No Such Thing As A Fish - No Such Thing As Hurricane Schmurricane

Episode Date: March 10, 2017

Live from Up The Creek in Greenwich to celebrate the third birthday of the podcast, Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss the weirdest storm name suggestions, President Johnson's johnson shower and the Old People Forecast

Another episode of No Such Thing as a Fish, a weekly podcast this week coming to you live from up the creek in Greenwich, London. My name is Dan Shriver, and I am sitting here with Anna Chazinsky, Andrew Hunter Murray, and James Harkin, and once again we have gathered around the table with our four favorite facts from the last seven days, and in no particular order, here we go. Starting with my fact. My fact this week is that scientists can now predict when someone is going to fall over. three weeks before it happens. These are scientists who've been studying Miranda. This is, this shockingly is true.

So what they do is they notice, obviously it's a problem that a lot of elderly people fall over, and that leads to a lot of problems. So they've been studying it, and what they've realized is that you can actually spot the moment when a fall is going to happen due to the speed that someone travels at. travels at. So what they've done is they put cameras into a house and they've monitored someone

walking and they've noticed a speed change that happens. And when the speed change happens, it means because something is deteriorated inside the body. So it means that they walk a lot slower. Therefore, they predict and they've shown from these studies that in the subsequent three weeks, a fall is going to happen. So robots are now monitoring old people to see if they're changing speed and they're down by like 0.5 miles an hour, set the text and you can stop them from falling over. Well, and then as the granddaughter or whatever, you have to go to the house immediately and stand there in front of them

with your arms out at all the times. It does sound like the old people are falling over in slow motion. I've watched you've been framed and that's kind of what happens. Is that amazing? It's incredible, yeah. It's your stride length.

So the other thing it can measure, actually, I'm not sure how they do this with the sensors that they install, but if you're still, stride length changes by just about seven centimetres, that can be detected, and that also is a strong indicator that you're going to have a fall within the

coming few weeks. Yeah, and to illustrate how effective it is, because it is unbelievable. If your walking speed decreases by 5.1 centimetres a second, you have an eight, as a pensioner, you have an 86% chance of falling over within three weeks

compared to a 20% chance if your speed hasn't decreased that much, which is an unbelievable difference. is there's just huge change that suddenly happens. And I think the idea is that you get these robots in people's houses and it means that they can kind of hang out a lot more without people looking after them, right? Yeah.

They're not actual robots, are they? Well, I mean, what is a robot? Well, like, hello, how are you? That's an android. An android is human-shaped, whereas a robot is just anything that's robotic. Yeah. If I bought, I was like, my best friend is a robot, and he arrived, and it was like a camera.

Do you know what robots they use for older people, actually? No. One robot they use is Paro, who's a seal. And so Paro was built in Japan, and it's a little seal, which is robotic, and it responds to, like, being hugged and being spoken to. And the creator of this little robot seal is called Takanori Shibata, and he chose it because he said people are unlikely to have

unhelpful memories of real seals. So it's not going to freak anyone out because very few people have been assaulted by a seal. But just one person who's, you know, lost a hand to a seal. So there is a... It's a buster. It's just a quick... It doesn't matter. It's a better than development.

No mind. The British researchers are currently teaming up with Japanese... I've written Japanese robots. They're teaming up with Japanese researchers. To use monitoring robots. And they're trying to install cultural differences. And one of the reasons that they're doing it in the UK is... you have a lot of people from a lot of different cultures living here.

One of the researchers said the following, I think she was Greek herself. She said a robot might be taught not to try and cheer up a Greek woman whose husband died months ago because Greek widows are expected to be sad for at least a year. Wow. Wow. So it's kind of installing the cultural sensitivity.

That's very good to know. Whereas I suppose in other cultures the robot will just say, come on, Gerard, you know. But it instructs them to stay depressed if they're Greek. Can't help it notice you smiled a second ago. You know, you've lost your husband. Inappropriate. Just on falling over, this is an experiment that you might not have seen.

It's fantastic. It's an experiment on penguins, which put penguins on treadmills. And it's fantastic. So penguins have to strike a balance, right? Because they have to go a long time without food because they're feeding their young and they're foraging for their young and they have to, you know, so they lose a lot of weight during the period

where they're hunting. So they need to put on as much weight as possible. But if they put on too much weight, they become completely in agile and predators will catch and eat them. And so that's no good for their young either, obviously. So the scientists from the University of London wanted to test, you know,

the sort of relationship between weight and walking speed and this team just put them on treadmills and didn't feed them for hours and days in fact no but they're used to it they're fine didn't feed them for two weeks and put them on a treadmill and some of the penguins started cheating right so there's a treadmill and then there's a little hood over the treadmill

so that they're in the same place all the way along and some of the penguins just leaned against the back wall of this canopy and sort of water skied along the treadmill The thing about penguins is I think it's a myth But in the Falkund Islands supposedly Plains go over them, fly over them

And they just look and look and look and look And they fall over No they deepened it just very recently They did a study where I think people went out To film them and they sent planes over And they looked up and they were like Oh it was a plane And then they were all good

Yeah no they don't actually fall over But the discovery the penguins can talk really trumped the undiscovery. Yeah. Yeah, there's a lot of quotes going, is that Emirates? So another thing that is done in old people's homes. Another thing that's done in nursing homes

is installing therapy animals sometimes. So to make people feel better. And there's one particular therapy cat called Oscar who's been adopted in a nursing home in Rhode Island. And it's quite confusing the reasons why he was adopted because apparently he's generally unsociable but his one skill is, bizarrely, he can tell when someone's about to die.

So the only time he goes near someone is when they are about to die. He's the most terrifying cat. And he'll just suddenly run to somebody's room and sit on their bed and then if he's removed, then he'll scratch on the door, scratch on the door until he's let back in again.

Fuck! Is he... Is he killing him? One of the mysterious cats. They're always dead soon, with claw marks all over the room. He's detected over 50 deaths, and it's within hours.

So, I mean, it's very strong. This is a book, has been written by a doctor who works at his nursing home, and they think maybe he's detecting ketones, which are the chemicals that you release, chemicals that dying cells release. So there is a very subtle. change in the chemicals. He is in an old people's home though, isn't he?

Like a lot of these people are going to die at certain times. I like to see him put in a football stadium. So have they, what's happening to the cat? Is he still there? He's still there? Because he wants to know, don't you? He's under your seat. But that can't be, that can't be good for the morale. Phew. Wow. Where is the home? Sorry.

It's in Pittsburgh and you're scheduled to go next week. Do you know why we don't fall over in terms of our body and balance? Do you know why we don't fall over? Yeah. What are your feet? Get on the way. No, so yes, it is our legs. Thank you very much.

But there's a thing, and I've not actually, I read it earlier, I didn't write it down. So I'm freestiling here. There's a thing in our ear which everyone thought was a balance. making thing. Otterlith. Thank you. The otolith, which was meant to be a thing

that just gave us balance. I guess kind of like when you're measuring a door and you have that little thing in the middle. Spirit level. So you have a spirit level thing and you're a daughterlyar

and everyone thought that that's what was keeping you up. But it turns out they did an experiment and they worked out how to shut that off so that it wasn't in the humans that they were testing. that wasn't playing a factor into it.

They managed somehow to just turn off the switch. I think there was a switch in there and just turned it off. And what they noticed was the calves of a human is what actually provides the balance. It's not the feet, it's not that bit in between the foot and the calf. I really want to make this clear right now, okay, because you can't see this,

but Dan is saying calves, but he's clutching his thigh. Where the fuck's the carve? That's your curve. Ah. Move on to an anchor. Where did you think your thigh was? I posed the front bit of the...

Um, Dan, you're fortunate for you. I also read about this experiment and I did write it down. Because we do a factual podcast. And he's right. For our next fact, should we do that? Can I tell you very quickly one more thing about walking and running? The elephants can't run. Oh yeah?

Yeah. So they, well, they can run with their front half. This is kind of amazing. With the front half, they can... They run with their front legs, but not with their back legs. So what happens when we run is, our centre of gravity starts bumping up and down, and that waste energy.

So what elephants do is they start trotting along with their front legs to speed up their movement, but they keep on walking with their back legs. I don't get longer and longer. Like a slinky. You've all seen the sausage elephant. It's true. Their center of gravity stays a constant height from the ground, which most things doesn't. So they only run with half of their bodies. That's my fact, and it's as true as yours.

Let's, should we move on to our... Okay, it is time for fact number two. And that is James. Okay, my fact this week is that when he became president, Lyndon B. Johnson, installed a special shower in the White House, the fiber jet directly at his penis. I mean he became president after the assassination of Kennedy. He did. I thought you were saying that was a bit tasteless. It depends how long after he became president, I suppose.

If immediately after he was sworn in, he said, right, let's sort of this shower of penis situation. He wanted it as well to have the sort of the force of a fire hose. That's right. He wanted a needle-like intensity, which was the equivalent of a fire hose. and he had lots of jets, especially one up his bum and another one directly at his penis. And the jet, which went directly at his penis,

he nicknamed Jumbo, which is weirdly exactly what he nicknamed his actual penis. And that's true, he did. Really? It's weird, though. I think in the UK, it sounds more of a sort of audacious thing to name your penis, because I have a lot of American friends who...

No, they're just like... They have names. They're like, meat jumbo. Like, it's meat meat. What do you shake hands, you say that's normal for your American friends. This is also something that LBJ

was kind of known for. So there's a guy called Robert Carrow who's writing a five-volume biography of him. He's 80 now. He's done four volumes. He's working on the fifth. Listen to this. This is about LBJ. He early became famous for a Rabilasian earthiness,

urinating in the parking lot of the house office building as the urge took him if a colleague came into a capital bathroom as he was finishing at the urinal there he would sometimes swing around still holding his member which he liked to call jumbo hooting once

have you ever seen anything as big as this and shaking it in a brandishing manner as he began discoursing about some pending legislation he genuinely and I can't believe that we've only found this out like we've been looking at presidents for ages and suddenly it's like okay LBJ just took his penis out a lot

and he would do it in public in front of any reporter that was chatting to him. His inauguration speech actually was it was much better attended than Trump's because you'd go it's the biggest. I don't know Mr. President

the photos don't seem to say anything. It was cold, it was raining. So he would take it Now, while the journalists were sort of talking to him famously, and this is a bit that obviously they just keep having to hide these moments because they can't report on this, they asked him about the Vietnam War and they were like, tell us about, why are we fighting with Vietnam? His response, and I think it's because he was like, I don't quite have an answer. He unzipped his trousers, he pulled out his penis and he held it at them and he went,

this is why. And isn't it amazing that presidential press conferences have got no better since that? He did used to frequently ask AIDS to join him in the lavatory, didn't he? Yeah. So when he was giving them briefings or when he was just hanging out with them. So I think one of his, so men and women as well, one of his aides, Doris Kern's Goodwin, said she often accompanied him into the bathroom because he needed to take a pee, but he also wanted to continue talking.

And she recalled that the security advisor, when he joined, he complied really reluctantly and he stood in the furthest corner away from Johnson while Johnson was urinating, understandably, with his back to him, and the president said to him, come closer, come closer. I don't know if it was in that tone of voice, but... But then, Fundy complied and came closer, and Johnson later remarked,

I thought he was going to sit on my lap. Hasn't that guy ever been in the army? And I don't know what any of that really means. So weird. So he had a lot of affairs, LBJ. Also, all the people in his family had the initials LBJ. No. Yeah, his wife was called Lady Bird Johnson.

Her first name was Lady? No, her first name was Bird. Yeah. Sorry, Lady Bird was her first name Lady Bird. Well, it kind of was in a way. Like when she was a kid, they called her cute as a ladybird. They're not sure if they meant Ladybug or whatever. And then she was known as Bird throughout her whole life.

And then when she became a first lady, she became First Lady Bird. Yeah Carry on So he did have a lot of affairs He used to be very boastful About it actually And I think he got quite annoyed That JFK had a bit of a reputation

For being a womanizer in his time And apparently whenever anyone mentioned Kennedy's multiple affairs Johnson would bang the table And declare that he had had more women by accident than Kennedy had had on purpose I don't know what that means either Jumbo has a mind of his own

When he wanted to install the shower into the White House he was questioned about him and they said, you know, why would we do this? And he said, if I can move 10,000 troops in a day, you can certainly fix the bathroom in any way I want. And then it was a complete waste because as soon as Nixon entered the White House after him,

he took one look at the elaborate setup and said, get rid of this stuff. I like to think he took one shower, it blew his cock off. The showup did get reviewed by people other than LBJ. I thought you meant like on trip advice. Blew my cock off, one star. LBJ, by the way, he was, so he was in, by all accounts, a dickhead. In his, just like, you know, he would make people come in while he was having a poo to sort of tell them what he wanted to do.

but he also did a lot of prints which were quite exciting. We have mentioned this ages ago on the podcast, but he had a car that was an amphibious car. So it's a car that can drive on the road and then go into a body of water and still work. A sort of boat all of a sudden,

but it's still the car. Yeah. So what he used to do at the White House is he used to drive people around in the car and he would be talking to them and in the White House property there's a bit of a lake. It's a tiny bit of a body.

body water where you can go and just hang out. And he would drive the car down, suddenly, down the hill. And then he would pretend that the brakes had broken on the car. And he'd go, oh, no! And he would freak them out. And then they'd hit the body of water and then just become a boat. And then high fides all round. But that was a thing he did while he was president.

Do we have amphibious cars? I do not believe we have those that switch quickly enough for that practice of work. Have you never been on a duck tour? Yeah, I think it takes like 45 minutes for them to do the transfer on Road to River. Does it? I don't know. I've never been an adductor. Okay, it's time for fact number three, and that is Andy Murray.

My fact is that rejected names for British storms include Baldrick, Noddy, Megatron, and Branch Wobbler. Why? Someone that shouts. I was going to tell you all along So This is off that we've just had a big storm in the UK And this was a piece of wide about storm nomenclature And the Met Office started naming British storms in 2015

And the rationale was You sort of have a better handle It's a bit confusing when someone says That a large weather system or a storm is on the way It's a bit vague Whereas if you pin a name to a storm It makes it a lot more concrete and you know And the idea is easier to prepare for

So they've been doing this in America with tropical storms and hurricanes and things for decades. So we've got names for our storms and the Met Office, in their wisdom, asked the public to submit names. So there were things, one of the rejected ones was

Ina T-cup. There were other rejected ones, Big Boss, Vader, Voldemort. My favourite one was, and I think this was for a hurricane in the state. This was from someone called At Yuldol Thelcon. and he wanted to call it Schmaricane

so he'd be Hurricane Shmarrake They're usually named after people aren't they and it's usually names So what was the one Doris? So we just had Doris, yeah I quite like the idea of Gail And is that one that's been accepted? No, no, they didn't accept it

But it's a good one, isn't it? A few others like What was the one you said branch wobble up So some of the things like that Leaf shaker, leaf stripper and root ripper no idea. That's good. And also I quite like, someone said, we should call a storm King Henry the 5th.

Why? I don't know. He did storm through Northern France during the Hundred Years War. So do you know the first person who started to name weather events? No. No. This is a guy called Clement Littl.

He was Welsh. Okay, okay. What storm? Right. The first person to name weather events was a guy called Clement Linley Rag. This was a British guy in the 19th century who lived in Tasmania. He was a meteorologist and he decided to name storms to make them more memorable. But he named them largely after politicians so that he was able to say the name of a politician he didn't like

and then followed that with things like causing great distress. So, you know, he'd say David Cameron is causing great distress on the coast of Cornwall and you know George Osborne is wondering aimlessly about the Pacific Michael Gove is blowing people all over the place so they named storms only after women for a long time yeah and that was thought to be very misogynistic because the idea was the people who did it was in the 19th century and it was because women were similarly unpredictable to the weather and then there was they changed it eventually thankfully, there was a women's right

activist called Roxy Bolton which is where I spent a lot of my teenage years. But she suggested replacing the word hurricane because it sounds a bit like her ikane to himikane. So there is a theory that this is a 2014 study and it's a bit controversial.

It's a theory that hurricanes in America with women's names have higher death tiles than those with men's names because people think, oh, it's only Cindy or whatever it might be. As then they think, oh, I don't need to worry about a hurricane, you know. Is that actually what they think? Yeah, well, yeah, it's a, but it is controversial and it is a theory.

And it does include all the data from, I think, before the 70s when Hurricanes only had women's names. So it seems a bit dubious to me. Yeah. Do you know what Roxy Bolton said in her defense? offence of hurricanes being gender equal. She said, women are not disasters destroying life and communities and leaving a lasting

and devastating effect, which, A, I think that would be so cool if we were. But then she did immediately suggest naming them after senators. That was her suggestion. She had an axe to grind. It's good that they brought in the names. In the olden days, you would just call the name sometimes after a saint's day.

or some other things. In Ireland, they had one very big, it wasn't a hurricane, it was a storm, but they called it the night of the big wind. But it was such a severe storm. A lot of people thought the end of the world was happening because it happened on the epiphany, and they thought that maybe this was judgment day or whatever.

And it was so famous in the time. In 1908, they introduced pensions into Ireland. And a lot of people didn't have their birth records. And so the way they were telling, how old you are was to ask you if you remembered the night of the big wind Wow You know there's a theory

It's no longer believed but back in the day That wind Was created By time travellers All the wind and all the songs were created because of trees waving their branches

So they were waving that and suddenly wind That makes complete sense. I think as a child, I think you know, that's a natural thing to think, right? Because it's windy and there are trees moving. Yeah. And do you think maybe this comes for this?

But then do you think like, oh, this wind is caused by my heart falling off or something like that? Would that be ridiculous, James? There is a possibility that that's not a theory and it's actually a poem by Ogden Nash. It's also a line in a Terry Pratchett, but you might be thinking of that. Right.

So we should probably ignore the whole... Sure. What I find amazing is with weather, obviously it's all this kind of butterfly effect and chaos theory and stuff like that, that the tiniest little thing can cause massive weather systems. And so that means that weather forecasters actually, they say that they cannot predict any weather at all for 14 days. Anything over 14 days, it's completely impossible. Wow. But we can predict that old people are going to fall over for three weeks.

Yeah. But they often fall over when it's windy, so I assume that old people create the wind. We should move on to our final fact. I have a quick thing just about asking the public to name things. So a couple of years ago, Greenpeace had a competition. They wanted to name a whale to raise awareness of whaling. They wanted to sort of limit Japanese whaling efforts,

and so they picked a whale, and they said, please submit your names. And the finalists included things like Kaimana, which is a Hawaiian word, which means power of the ocean. There's a word shanti, which is Sanskrit for tranquility. And there was a huge amount of voting. And after all the voting had ended, the winner was Mr. Splashy Pants.

Crush the others. Got more than 78% of the vote. Next was Humphrey with 3%. The other top 10 got less than 1% each. It's still out there swimming around. It's the splashing hands. Okay, it is time for our final fact of the show, and that is Juzinski.

Yeah, my fact this week is that boxer crabs you see anemones as boxing gloves. And I don't know why I chose this fact because I can't pronounce the word anemone. I actually think if we all just say anemone... Anemone... Right, I've said it.

I'm just saying... It's actually a really interesting fact, guys. Yeah, I was just... I was thinking with my editor's head on, I've said it once, so now I can snip that in every single time, because I know we're going to get wrong every single time, aren't we?

So what is it? So this is incredible. This is boxer crabs, or they're also known as pom-pom crabs, and they use... They're known as pom-pom crabs, but the obvious reason that on their two front claws,

they always have to sea anemones. And so see anemones are often poisonous to other fish, even though they're not to us. They have poison cells in them. So they use these to ward off other fish, and they just wave these anemones at other fish to make sure they go away. But the thing that they've discovered in the last few weeks

is that if a boxer crab loses one of the anemones off one of its claws, it will tear the other one in half, and they reproduce egg sexually. So effectively, the crab is cloning the anemone, and it shoves that anemone onto its other claw. So it rips it in half, shoves it onto its other claw. And they think this is one of the main ways

that this species of anemone reproduces. It's insane. It's like the equivalent of, like, fighting Mike Tyson, knocking a glove off, him ripping a glove in half. And it growing into a form boxing glove in front of your face. Except that it's a live species that it's doing it. So it's like if Mike Tyson was boxing you and he's got cats. To defend himself.

and he just rips a cat in two and it grows another into a cat the other thing this crab does if it wants to eat because it can't put them down because it constantly has to be holding these two anemones for its defence

but sometimes it needs to eat so what it does it just leans over to some food and wipes the anemone along the surface it wants to eat from so it's like the cat picks up food for you what it's like is holding a cat in your hands and then dipping it in some soup

and then sucking it off the cat. The other annoying thing for the anemones is that the crabs starved them to an extent because if they're allowed to eat the normal amount that they would eat, they'd be too heavy for them to carry on their claws. So the crabs really control they're eating like a horrible dietitian or something

to make sure that they remain light enough for them to carry. What? It's a tough gig. What also happens is that say you're a crab and you've only got one anemone and then you meet another guy who's got two of them then you can fight him to get one of them one of them off him

now say you have three of them and one guy's got none they'll keep fighting and then they'll rip them apart and rip them apart until it doesn't matter what the number of crabs is they'll keep doing it until everyone has one on each arm yeah it's incredible

it's weird that they fight though because all the fights end up with the guy who had two he then only has one and he says okay well I just rip mine in two now I've got two But they have this weird little wrestling match. I want one too. Are you saying they should just distribute it at the start? Go, how many of us are we?

Okay, we need double that. I'll cut them up. Exactly, yeah. It's very bizarre. Wow. Maybe it's flirtatious, though, because a lot of crabs use their claws to flirt. So one of the most famous examples is the fiddler crab.

And the fiddler crab looks so cool because it really does just have this one claw, which is enormous and a different color as the rest of its body. So it's often like blue. or yellow, really bright colour. And the way they seduce is they just wave. And so they gives a lady a wave when they're a distance away.

And then as the lady gets closer, they then start using their claw to vibrate, I think. And they vibrate the ground with their claw. And scientists are saying it's like Morse code, as in they're communicating with their vibrations. But basically what it does is the longer they can vibrate and the harder... See, we're going to this.

Of course. the more stamina they have. And so women think, yeah, this guy can last. It's not called the rampant crab, isn't it? So I started looking into other animals that use other animals to attack. So animals are like, I now have a weapon and it's alive.

And I was very surprised by finding out that dolphins do this as well. Do they? So what do they use to attack? Sea snakes. Really? How would they do that? This is extraordinary.

So dolphins will find a sea snake and it will bite it on the midsection and it will drag it immediately and plunge it into a school of fish. All these things need to be very close to each other as it happens. They grab it and they bring it through and the snake is freaking out

and it's biting things as it goes along. So what it does is as it shoots into the school of fish the snake is biting all these fish and killing them as it goes and then the dolphin releases the snake and heads back and finds the booty. Wow, that's weird. Amazing.

Yeah, is that extraordinary? Yeah. And then there's this other thing that I read about, which is called the Indiana Jones octopus. I've renamed it. It's actually called the blanket octopus. And it's an extraordinary octopus in that it's got webbing between its tentacles. That's very rare, but it uses it so it can sail through the ocean, which is quite exciting. It takes the tides and just kind of goes.

But it's immune to the man-of-war jellyfish. And what it does is it grips it with a tentacle. and when it's going up to a prey that it wants to eat, it whips it like a whip and the thing. So it'll go and it'll hit it, poison it and kill it, and then they'll die and they'll eat it. So there are Indiana Jones-style octopuses in the ocean, whipping stuff to death.

That's incredible. Why is this not on David Adamers planet Earth? Why have we not seen that guy? That is unbelievable. Yeah, it's pretty amazing. Crafts are quite romantic in lots of ways. So their mating is, most crabs can only mate when they use. molted, so when they're out of their skin and when they're soft and vulnerable, and then

they meet, yeah, when they, yeah, exactly, when they, they have both literally made themselves vulnerable to each other. They take their clothes off. And they take their clothes off. That's so nice. So they meet, the first thing is they meet, and then they hug each other for several days. And then they mould, and then they made. I don't know, you say that is romantic, but being hooked for several days.

It's one of them going, oh. Yeah, okay. That definitely sounds one-sided. We need to wrap up very shortly, so do you guys have stuff you want to say before we do? I really got distracted by lobsters when researching this, which are like crabs, but more fun. So just really quickly, just on crustaceans fighting.

So lobsters, I didn't realize, all hate each other. So if a lobster comes across another lobster, then they'll start fighting. That's why lobster nets aren't that effective, because as soon as one lobsters in there, it fights off all the other lobsters that try to get in. And what happens in the lobster? This is my safe space.

I'm king of this enclosed prison. Nothing can harm me in here. So what there is is in every lobster community. There's a dominant lobster. And what he does is every night, he goes out around the other male lobster's houses and he beats them up just to show just to show that he's the main lobster,

genuinely, and the women are really turned on by this. So the women try to seduce him, because they're like, he's the dominant one. But as National Geographic said, the problem, when the women go to his door and knock on his door and say, I want to mate with you, you're the dominant lobster, is he just wants to beat people up all the time.

So he's not that interested in sex. And so what the female lobsters do is they release a pheromoon, so they urinate out of their eyes, which lobsters do. Well, this is much more romantic than your crap guys. This releases a drug into the male loves the lair, which relaxes him, and then means that he's ready to meet.

But I just think they're amazing. I can't believe someone urinates out of their eyes at you, and your first thing is, I'm now so relaxed. I'm ready for sexy time. Netflix and urine out the eyes. Grabber. I'm going to wrap us up. Okay, that is it.

That is all of our facts. Thank you so much for listening. If you would like to get in contact with any of us about the things that we've said over the course of this podcast, we can be found on our Twitter accounts. I'm on at Shreiberland. Andy?

Andrew H.M. James. At 88. And Anna. You can email podcast at QI.com. Yep. And you can go to our mutual Twitter account, which is at QI podcast,

or you can go to our website. No Such Thing as a Fish.com. Thank you for listening at Homes. Guys, thank you so much for being at our third birthday. party, this has been awesome. We know up.