Nobody Panic - How to Be a Good Godparent AKA Side Guide

Episode Date: January 31, 2023

Recently become a Godparent? Hoping there might be an offer in the works? Panic-stricken about getting it right? Stevie and Tessa (neither of them godparents, but strongly believe they could be) deep dive into the Dos and Don'ts. Crucially, Don't drop them in the font, and Do ignore the bit of the internet which suggests you're supposed to pay for their schooling. Subscribe to the Nobody Panic Patreon at patreon.com/nobodypanicWant to support Nobody Panic? You can make a one-off donation at https://supporter.acast.com/nobodypanicRecorded by Naomi Parnell and Edited by Aniya Das for Plosive.Photos by Marco Vittur, jingle by David Dobson.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/nobodypanic.Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/nobodypanic. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, I'm Carriad. I'm Sarah. And we are the Weirdo's Book Club podcast. We are doing a very special live show as part of the London Podcast Festival. The date is Thursday, 11th of September. The time is 7pm and our special guest is the brilliant Alan Davies. Tickets from kingsplace.com. Single ladies, it's coming to London.

True on Saturday, the 13th of September. At the London Podcast Festival. The rumours are true. Saturday the 13th of September. At King's Place. Oh, that sounds like a date to me, Harriet. it. Welcome to Nobody Panic for How To Pod with a can-do attitude. Wow! Wow! I just flew out my mouth. Where's that been all these years? I don't know.

It's really nice. Thank you. We have got a can-do attitude. In a way, we do. I'm Stevie. Tessa, hello. Hello. We had an email and it was an email suggestion for another how-to episode, which we do every week. This is from Alice. I've just realized that the original email Alice sent us was the 24th of September 2021. Oh, Alice. But then we got a follow-up that was, oh yeah, two months ago, so it's still quite a long time ago. Okay, I will read this email. Hello, Stevie and Tessa. I would love you to do a podcast episode on how to be a good godparent slash anti-type person. My best friend is having a baby and she's my first friend to have one. I don't have children myself and I don't have siblings. So I haven't had any practice with nieces or

nephews. And apart from an awkward hold of my cousin's baby about 10 years ago, oh, we've all had that awkward hold of your cousin's baby, weirdly. God's stop holding that baby. I have zero experience of how to be around babies and children. I would like to not be a colossally awkward oaf around this child and actually be the hashtag cool godparent. So we got that email in 1843 and then a mere two months ago, news update, says Alice. I did get asked to be. the official godparent. I've just sent her a quick email now saying,

congratulations, we're recording the episode right now, and I have not mentioned the facts. I am sorry, Alice, we were so slow. That's on us. We're so slow sometimes. We are very, very proud of you that you've been asked for your official job. That shows that your friend knows

that you'll do a good job. It's like a vouching, so it doesn't matter that you don't have any experience with kids. Your friend already is like... And you proved your worth by checking in advance. The official title had not bestowed upon you when you're already wanting to make sure you could do a good job. God bless you.

God's parent or not, you know, and that's how we should all feel. Again, on the subject of can-do attitude, sometimes being too can-do, both of us were like, yeah, we'll do this episode, neither of us a godparent. No. I haven't even got any. But crucially and helpfully for the listener, I put a call out on social media so we actually have advice from actual god-parents. I don't think we need it. And there we go.

That's why the brand tagline works so well. Can-do. Should we though? That's the question. That's the question. And before we deep dive in to this layered topic, Stevie, what's your adult thing this week? So, long-time listeners may have heard me very casually referenced, probably about a year ago, that I'd taken control of the thermostat in the flat.

Oh, yes, okay, yeah. Yeah. I realized that I'd sort of let my partner, the Shadow, do everything because he was like, yeah, all right, I'll do this. I'm up for that, and I'd like to take care of everything. And then I was like, I actually don't even know where the rinse aid is for the dishwasher. So I thought I didn't insert myself into the domestic situation, took control of the thermostat. Winter came, obviously quite a tricky one, the bills, all of that.

So spotlight on thermostat. Sure, sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. Coming to the four. Going to the four. My partner just keeps asking, because he doesn't know how to use the thermostat, and he's very much like, it's good that you've inserted yourself.

Now can you please sort out the thermostat? Because I need to now change it to then bring it up to speed for this winter. He can't change it. what he can do is petition the council, you, to see if you would be open to the idea. Exactly. I was open to the idea, but I didn't do it for three months. So we lived at a flat where it would just be sort of boiling hot at three in the morning. And is he not allowed to say anything?

He kept going, Stevie, can you please? You know how you keep saying, like, I want to be involved? You have to do it. And I kept being like, absolutely, well, I'm so sorry. And then I just kept not. And what I'm trying to say is that I've changed the thermostat. Great. But we have saved quite a lot of money because I think the entire amount of time the heating has been on has been in the entire of winter is like three and a half hours.

Well done you. I don't think it's a well done. I think my adult thing is that I did it wrong there. And it's all very well being adult, but you've got to retain some sort of consistency. And if you're walking around bleating about you're the thermostat king, I let my people down. my people being units of heat that's really good thanks what's yours well

it's about inserting yourself my therapist just is obsessed with telling me to insert myself into everything insert yourself into what situations decisions so insert yourself into the domestic setting I'm going to look after the thermostat rather than going well I don't know how to do anything

because you didn't say I'm going to you set what you wanted do. Insert yourself. Insert yourself. Express yourself. Yes. Yes. Is that what you doing? Yes. Great. That's really good. Go on. I'm so glad that you knew my song. Thank you so much. Insert yourself. Insert yourself.

Mine, as you know, I don't have problems inserting myself. I'm already in. I think you do have problems inserting yourself. Oh, thank you. No. Well, don't thank, no, don't thank me. You've come to that conclusion through our podcast thing. Yes, I know. I know. Less socially, but more. Okay. So mine is that I inserted myself into moving the television. Sentence! Okay, I appreciate the... Yeah, you're getting involved

in the inserting yourself. So the cable for the telly was like just lay on the middle of the floor in a way that was like, that's not great, but what else we're going to do? And then I was like, I think what that needs is to be sort of hidden. So I sort of put it up the top,

laced it behind a shelf, which was quite smart. God tier insertion. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm asserting myself and I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, look at me go. But the cables attached to the television. I had to unplug it. And I thought, oh, how does that come out of there?

I guess I'll just yank it. Right. And it did come out. I don't know if you have ever unplugged the telly from its aerial. Oh, from his aerial? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I do not touch that. That's the thing.

This is not our area. This is not where we go. The menfolk will do this. But I was like, how dare I? The patriarchy lives. How sexist? Yank me. Misogyny lives within me.

I will insert the telly. I will insert the telly. I yanked it out. I thought, Oh, no. So anyone who ever has done it will know it's like a big black cable, then a copper wire just like sticking out that you think that can't be right. And then some just like raw wire wool. And you think, no, no, no, everything's gone badly here. But it turns out that is correct. So I done that. I thought, fucking hell. But I just, I did my lacing in the shelf. I inserted it and did everything I was meant to do before I had to come back to put it back into the telly. I was literally thinking of various lies I was going to say about how I had. happened. I fell over and tripped and the only thing that stopped my fall is the TV. Or then I was like, I'll just put it back in as best as I can, not say anything. And then he'll be like, right, but the cables now are behind that shelf. Is it? Is it? What? What's gone on? Gaslighting. Gaslighting.

Gaslighting. Al-in he did it. Honestly, I was just on a chair, gently threading, thinking about how to gase like my boyfriend into thinking he had done this. Then I got back. I was just tried to shove the copper in. I thought, this is a disaster. Then I thought, take a breath, take a step. I thought thought about the podcast in my head. I thought, don't panic the name of the podcast. Did a little lap of the house, came back to it, got Google up, got some men from YouTube to help me. And you have to sort of open up this big wire thing, like a sort of lotus flower. You put a thing in, you literally insert it. You have to do all this stuff. Anyway, it turns out I hadn't done it. That's not sexual.

It was quite sexual actually. There was a lot of inserting... A lot of that. It was a very phallic experience. But I did it and the teleworks. That's so great. And I didn't have to tell you one and I didn't have to gaslight any of. I mean, you will have surely told your partner the moment he came in

because that's a funny story. No. Because you wanted to remain... I wanted to not say in case... Something went wrong. Anything had gone arise. That is so correct. So I didn't want to be like, oh, that lotus flower.

Hey, that's phallet. And he's like, why have you touched the lotus flower? You don't touch that? The TV's penis. Yeah, no, no, no. So I didn't say anything. That's really good. Yeah, tellies.

I unplugged them all the time in my head. He's just walking around saying that. I think he's probably got an idea that you'd play the TV. Oh, yeah, that. I could have gone if I wanted. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pop it back in as well, probably. Yeah, I can insert that if you want.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Excellent. You actually, yes, you're one of the few people, I think, that don't insert yourself, but also fully insert yourself and it's unclear which one you're going to go for. What will it be today? Yes. You're absolutely right, Stevie.

You're absolutely right. Anyway, my instinct was like down tools, wait for help, but I was like, no, be your own help. You can do this. You can do this. And you did. And that's what I say to people thinking, can I be a godparent?

I say yes. All you want to do is you've got to yank the plug. Yank the plug. Insert it. Insert it with the flower. That's it. Easy, busy. Don't tell your boyfriend.

Right. And that's god parenting. Would you like to know the history of godparent? More than anything in the world. It's quite simple. So the role of the godparent arose when there was a need in early Christian times for someone to vouch for the candidate who wanted to join the Catholic Church. Like a guide on the side.

The godparent acted as a mentor. Guide on the side. Yeah. Elf on the shelf, guide on the side. I like that much more than Godparent. Yeah, me too. Side guide. Side guide. The Godparent acted as a mentor for the person as they lived out and developed their faith. So the roles of sort of outside of the Catholic Church now have sort of become anything, hasn't it?

So it's like vouching for the child almost. And is this when the child was an adult they had to arrive to do their vouch? No, no. When they were a child? Oh, great. Going to that thing where you wear the white dress. Yeah, I mean, I've really gone that deep into it, to be honest. I haven't really looked at it.

What's that thing called when you go to the wear the white dress, please? Confirmation. Is it? I've shot myself the foot by talking about the... original role of godparents, which puts us down a very religious Catholic path. But godparents, of course, are the modern godparent, the mod parent, act as role models to help and guide children emotionally, practically and spiritually from offering career advice or providing financial assistance. The role of a godparent has evolved to match the needs of modern families.

Wow, wow. So I can't go too deep into the history. But thank you for beginning us down that path. as we now, hard handbrained turn out of the past and into the future. Like, maybe Alice in this case or whoever is this thing who's is a godparent, maybe you did a proper service and went to a christening and you're part of the proper ceremony. Or sometimes you're just more informally asked and maybe there's sort of like a naming ceremony or something just like in the garden. Or is it what's up and it's just like, do you want to be a god parent? Yeah, you just got a text.

And now you're a godparent. Traditionally, again, in the past, the role is to... Why didn't you answer this question? Why did I stop, you know? I'm so excited to learn. Traditionally, it's not very exciting. It's that a girl gets two godmothers and one godfather. Really?

And a boy gets two godfathers and one godmother. But now I've said it, could be wrong. Have you got any godparents? We've had a year to like, prepare for Alice. Alice is like, the child's 10, for God's sake. You're done. No, no, have you got any god parents? No.

I haven't got any either. Right. But my parents have got loads of godchildren. Have your parents? No. Have they not? No. I'd ask your parents.

They're absolutely great. And you've really hit on the issue, which is like, it doesn't mean that you're bad if you've not been asked to be someone's god parent. No, of course. They're not religious. I think as well, there are some people say like, oh, well, obviously so and so will have to be the god parent because they sort of say, it's sort of like a bride's made situation where it's like, well, they obviously want to be asked kind of thing. Right. Whereas I think my parents just don't really care. No, I understand.

Yeah, I don't, I think it's because I've not really had one. I don't really get it. But it's been quite helpful, read, because I put a thing out on my Instagram. Yeah. Because it seems to be, you are, like, almost more like a fairy godmother, essentially. Your role is to just try to help the parents and be like a backup. And like babysitting seems to be ultimate helpful.

It's like the bridesmaid thing where people can be offended if they're not made godparents. and you might be listening being like, well, I'm not a god parent, and loads of my kids have, loads of my kids have kids. Loads of my friends have kids. That doesn't mean you're a bad person, is what I'm saying. I'm not just saying that because I'm not a god parent, because I think I've only one of my friends and my children, but like, yeah. I'm not one and loads of my friends have had them.

And while I'm not grumpy, I'm crying. I'm crying. Yeah, I'm like, well, come on. But I would say that I wouldn't be acting towards them any differently than I currently am without my role. like I would still be doing the stuff and showing up and buying overly elaborate small dungarees and coat options that are relentlessly too small for everyone

and everyone's like thank you what's this but I think it definitely can be like oh they got us and I didn't it suddenly ushers in a whole new wave of your life that's like I remember me it yeah who knew that you'd be a bit sad that you're not a godparent right even though technically what it means is like you have to side guide them into the church and you're supposed to look after

if anything happens to the parents. Yes. So this is a nightmare. When I was a bit older, I got a god's sister, who is my mum's one. And they like came with us to lots of stuff. And we're like very much like a part of our family, which was very nice. And I have two godbrothers of my dads that equally had this like, just a nice like, here are just some extra children.

It felt more like, here are some cousins that aren't yours. My mum is also my cousin's godmother. What? Yeah, yeah. Anti-and godmother. I know. That's what I said. What's the point?

I said that at the time. I said that. And then he turned 21 recently and my mum was like, I've got to do this as an auntie. I was like, and you're his godmother. And she was like, no, I'm not. I'm like, yes, you are. Go and check.

You're his godmother. What a waste, because you're already, you're already there. So I guess like, if I had to choose somebody, I would be like, I'm going to choose the richest people I know. Yeah, you know, who are going to take the role to be like, let's go fun places. Yeah, and I think that feels like the pressure of like,

so what do I need to do? Like we sort of split between fun things with the kid. The kid is like, I've got a cool godmother. Yeah. And then helpful for the parent. Yes. And a lot of parents have been messaging saying, as a parent, I would just say babysitting. Then capitals, I'm a parent, babysitting.

I think the lack of affordable childcare in this country means that offering to babysit is like gold. So I think that's, if you're able to do that, you live close enough and you're able to offer and because they won't ask you unless they are desperate but if you offer like George it's like come around on like a Saturday and you guys can go out for dinner and just be yourselves for a bit and like that would be the absolute dream and then you will start to develop a relationship with the child outside of like oh my god I'm a godparent

and so I must by godparenty things you'll actually get to know the baby as they grow up and like their likes, this likes like maybe they're really fussy eaters with all the little quirks that you'll then sort of be able to, as they get older, be a better godparent to them, I suppose. Because then from the kid's side, it feels very much like, take them out for fun stuff, like fun presents,

always remember birthdays, try and outshine the parents with a better gift every birthday. And a lot of it is about, seems to be, a lot of people giving advice about money and stuff to, like, offer to pay for things. like offered to pay for their schooling. I was like, okay. Gosh. A very particular type of family that would not be, yeah, for everybody.

But like, and you don't have to do that. But I mean, like, that's the top end of the spectrum. So people are doing that. But, like, you can... That's what I mean. I mean being like, I'm going to choose the richest people I know. And they're like, let me pay for the schooling. Well, that's probably why people do pick Godparents

because they want also, I suppose, someone really reliable, they can rely on if they're indisposed or theirs. I'm going to have, loads, not tell them all about the other ones. That's really smart. Hey? Yeah.

So they all think they're the godparent. Like 20 godparents. Yeah, so they're not having a christening in a church, just a text. Everyone gets one. What about birthdays? They're not all coming to the same day. Right. Do it shifts. Do it shifts.

Yeah. So then the child gets like a seven day birthday with like three godparents. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And shift in rotation. This is the stuff. That's the take home. It feels like there's a feel's a bit of a divide between like sort of pre-10 and post 10, like pre 10, your role is like showing up for the parents.

Can I hold this baby? Can you go out? Can I buy some fun shoes? Can I do some boy? Yeah, can I take it shoe shopping? Can I do this? And then post it, can I take it? Can I take it? Can I take that off your hands for a bit? And then post-end, it becomes a transition to being like, and now it's about the child. Yeah. What was the child actually want to do? Can I take it? Can I take it? Can I be the fun auntie godmother who takes you to Disneyland or Legoland or does fun stuff? Or if it's like a school disco, you know, take take them to get some like trousers or like new address. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll be yeah. And like, tell me all the confidences about the who you have a crush on and, you know, all of this stuff.

Gossiping and like that sort of stuff. And also as well, I think as they get older, you can, if you've already seen them when they're younger, you don't have that kind of like, you're just meeting this like child like, hello. What do you? What do we talk about? You'll have, you got a history. I think godmothering is being given this like official badge that says like, I'm going to insert. Insert. I'm literally going to insert myself. But like without being asked, I'm like, I'm coming around on Monday just to help and do the washing up and like tidy.

Like I'm just going to be without being asked because I know you're never going to reach out for help. I'm, you've given me this badger's godmother means I'm saying I'm coming around. Yeah. I'm taking this baby off your hands. What Saturdays are you? Are you free and do you want to like hang out and I will come in? Yeah. And also like, you know, because I suppose it's daunting when you don't have.

Any experience with babies, you're like, I'm going to take your baby to soft play. You're like, well, you're not, and the mum won't let you do that. And that's fine. And so, but you know. You've got to build up to soft play. You've got to build up to even babysitting. And so, you know, when in the early stages, like some people have said, like, when the baby's born, frozen meals, top of where, bring around, just be there. Insert yourself.

Insert yourself. But then as they get older, then, yeah, like, you don't understand. of mine the parents' authority, but be a fun alternative. So it's like, you don't want to be like, okay, so you're never allowed to do this? Well, I'm going to take you to do that. Because that is going to...

Shitty behavior. It's kind of shitty behavior. But also as well, remembering that... Because I don't really have any experience with the children at all, but my partner has nieces who we hung out with what we've been hanging out with since they were like, I don't know, like eight or not 12 or something. I was terrified.

They've now come to stay maybe once a year. but they'll come for like a long weekend. Me and my partner was absolutely exhausted afterwards. We made the mistake of like thinking you have to do stuff all the time. But actually kids are just like really happy just to sit around and kind of draw or like you're like taking them out for milkshakes or like taking them out for like we've got a dog. So it's like a dog out for a walk and they have to pick the poo up and it's like really funny. Kids are really like sponges and they're just so happy to hang out and ask questions. And there's something that you might be like,

well I need to take them to some sort of huge Jurassic Park Expo you don't you don't have to spend money you can just be with them and watch cartoons with them and I think if you start small at the start and you're just around and there it'll be less scary

when they're 13 yes I think yeah not doing anything until they're 13 then I'm like okay I'm here now for the schooling you'll be like no no no nobody wants to hang out with you I think Alice is concerned there about like I've not been with any babies I haven't held a baby for 10 years.

I don't want to be this awkward oaf, which I think was a very nice expression. I totally understand that everybody has felt like terrified. Holding a baby. When I first met, in fact, long time listeners will know, Phoebe of the Wine episode. Oh, very good, Phoebe.

Was enormously pregnant during that episode. Drinking away. No, she wasn't. That baby is now two, coming up to three maybe. No, he must be coming up to two. Either way, there's another one now. I find my own confidence,

even just knowing the second one, I'm so much more relaxed. When I met the first one, I had to sit on the floor. I wanted to lie on the floor to hold him in case I fell. And I was like, please take this back. It's so precious.

And now the next one, I'm like, yeah, slop him around. You know, you just, the speed at which you just get confident and good around children is remarkable. and you really just started like take things in your stride much more. And so she did, and equally the parents become like way more relaxed and fine. And also I feel like now that she has a newborn to look after,

I am I not official godparent, but certainly have inserted myself role. I'm very much like, I'm just coming around to stay the night. Like I'm just, I'm here. People love it when you turn up at the doorstep and with a backpacker to say, I'm staying over. I would say as a parent of a new, well, my small experience having done that, is that they actually are quite glad. Really?

Yeah, genuinely. I would hate that. Well, that's what you don't have a newborn. Yeah, of course. Yeah, no, I'm saying. So, of course, if someone showed up now and was like, I'm coming to stay, I'd be like, get out of my house. But if you had, like, a tiny monkey just on you that needed you 24.

Or a baby, yeah. Yeah, but that's the thing. I'm trying to imagine something, but I might as well imagine the thing of this. George. Okay, yeah. Like a baby monkey. Okay, imagine that. But just something that feels like, you just like, I don't know what it wants, I don't know anything.

Yeah. Just a thought of someone who's like, I'm here, give me the baby. And people are like, thank you. Yeah. And then they're like, I just want to go to the bathroom. You know, like, please just give me one, 10 minutes on my own. And so people truly like you showing up. Equally now, I feel my role.

And the housemate who left me, of course, and the forensic accountant whose clothes I used to wear again for the long time listeners, we went around the other day to help with the older one. And she just told us where his nursery was. made us go and get him. And we just arrived at the nursery and were like, hello, we're here for the kid. And the nursery was like, obviously not. I'm not going to just give you a child. And we were like, oh, go on. And then she was like, what's the password? And we were like, and we like, rang Phoebe and she was like, asparagus. So we were like, is it asparagus? And the one was like, no, you need to wait. What, you need to leave. And so like, we couldn't, we couldn't do it.

But I was like just surprised. Like suddenly we were just walking along the road holding this two-year-old's hands. He's telling us about his day at nursery. What he's learned? What his favorite dinosaurs are? I was like, okay, this is something that maybe a year ago I would have been like, I would rather die than be in charge of getting the child from nursery. I don't understand.

What do I do? Where do I go? How tight do I hold this paw? Yeah. And now I'm just like, chat, chat, get in the car. Here are your Christmas. How your car seat works. Like, you just, it's a really steep learning curve once you're like, oh, okay.

This is okay. And you just, you find your groove and it's not something to be terrified of. Absolutely. And put the child's birthday in your calendar for God's sake. And make sure you always get them a present. Not just in the calendar, a week before you add in, it's the birthday next week. Yes. No point looking in the day and realizing.

Oh no, no point of that. Also here's a nice bit of advice. Don't worry about being spectacular. Just be consistent. Check in as and when you can. That's, I think, the nicest. That's it. Insert yourself.

Yeah. And insert yourself. Because it's, yeah, no, don't worry about being spectacular. Oh my God. That's it, because you're so, me, buying all the clothes from Harrods and, you know, going mad and making them a mobile once. We made our friend, a friend when we were much, much younger, had a baby when she was 22, and we made this mobile. and had all these bits on it and a dream catcher

and we went around and she was like, okay put it in a drawer and then we were like and then another friend of ours revealed that who had gone around after us said,

Teser and Ellie came they bought him, they made him a mobile out of twigs and twigs and soil and then we'd like insist as she hang it over the baby's crib

and she was like I won't be doing that it had an Eiffel Tower like little key ring but on a bit of fishing wire. Right. I mean, just over the baby. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, it's very easy to get yourself hung up on being spectacular, but just be consistent. That's your idea of spectacular, is it? Okay. Hanging some twigs over a child. Honestly, yeah. I was like, your aunties from

the earth have made you this, you know? My God. A nice bit of advice sort of towards the end is get them used to your presence in the room. Lidlies are just taking it in and sussing you out. I think that's part of it, like, if you're just around when they're young, they will get used to you and associate you with like, you're like, you know, my mum or my dad, but you bring me presents and feel fun, you know? Oh no, she's having an emotional moment. It's just about, it's just about the mobile again. No, it's not about the mobile. It's about that, about the inserting yourself that Rudy, the elder of these two children, the other day, drew a picture and said, this is my family. Oh, no.

Emma, Dad, this is Grandma and Grandad, and this is Tesla and Kat. Oh, that's so nice. They live in London together. I guess he thinks we're together and I don't mind it. Yeah, that is nice. And they're really fun and then he drew a little picture of a dragon because we play dragons with him. Oh, God. It's so easy to play dragons.

You just say, I'm a dragon. He says, I'm a dragon. Done. Yeah, that's the thing. I think the stress comes from like, what if my games aren't complex? What are my games aren't complex? God, your game can be so easy. The best thing is you just go like, okay, I'm going to put all these things on the table.

Have a look at it. Look away. I'm going to take one thing off. What is it? And they're like, ah! And that is until they're 40. Yeah, easy. And exactly, it doesn't have to be spectacular. Just consider somebody who wants to play with you and give you the time of day and pay attention and be present and be there. Rather than arriving once every five years. Again, I don't have any God, again, we don't have any Godparents. But I know friends who do have them and they're like, oh, this is my Godfather. that, you know, he comes once every five years and gives me something expensive and leaves again.

And you're like, okay. Yeah, it's odd. Odd. And so much nicer. Someone just hung out and was fun. Absolutely. Did dragons. You are fun, Alice. You can play dragons with them.

You're going to be amazing. And actually considering how long ago you sent the email, you probably are already doing it and you're amazing. You're already balls deep in god parenting. Hopefully it was helpful. Any more from the shoutouts? Lots of really, I'll just read some.

Lots of really noisy presents. Unhelpful. Very unhelpful. Don't forget the day of their birthday. For the love of God, don't forget the birthday. A lot of people forgetting their birthdays is what I can see here. Spent time with them rather than money. Don't drop the child.

Okay. Oh, offer to babysit or take them out. The park when small, the cinema, or clip and climb when bigger. Clip and climb. Bit of far. I want to go to clip and climb. Don't forget their birthday. Oh, no.

Some quite bleak ones. A one in Gerdals, become godlike. A lot of fun. A lot of fun there. And... Oh yeah. And then I think the biggest one, double check how to spell the child's name

before having it embroidered on the gift. No. There we go. So look. But of fun though, but if you continue to show up, that's just a funny story for their 18th, you know. Yes, hopefully that helped Alice. And just consistent, not spectacular.

Be consistent, not spectacular. And you will go far, my friend. You're going to be wonderful. You're all going to be wonderful. And if anyone has listened to this who's suddenly, and statistically, given our listenership, I do believe at least one person is going to see the title of this episode and go, it's their birthday. Yes.

It's your birthday. Write it in the calendar. It's your birthday today. No, write it in the calendar one week before the birthday. This is the key. Yeah. But also write it in their actual birthday as well. so you don't get confused and think their birthdays

a week before, which I've done that before. But like, get present for Sown Center, but like, oh my God, it's that day! And then actually it was a week before. Oh, gosh. Voiced by your own Pletard. Yeah. You tried too hard.

I did try too hard. If you've got any more, was you because they say, sorry? I'm whispering, flute too close to the sun. Thank you, actually. Just to see us out. Yeah, no, it's good. If you have any more episode suggestions that you'd like us to tackle two years from now,

so please email us, Nobody Panicpodcast at gmail.com. There's also some lovely DMs that we haven't got around to doing episodes of yet. I've responded and gone, yes, we're doing them, but we will. And the DMs are at Nobody Panic Pod. That's Twitter. And just have a really great week.

Godparents and one and all, God bless and everyone.