Nobody Panic - How to Look After a Dog (Part 2)

Episode Date: May 10, 2022

Stevie now has a dog (Piper!) and would like to impart her wisdom as a companion to of the previous episode on this topic. Tessa listens. At one point Stevie tears up with sincerity and emotion.Subscribe to the Nobody Panic Patreon at patreon.com/nobodypanicWant to support Nobody Panic? You can make a one-off donation at https://supporter.acast.com/nobodypanicRecorded and edited by Naomi Parnell for Plosive.Photos by Marco Vittur, jingle by David Dobson.Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/nobodypanic. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, I'm Carriad. I'm Sarah. And we are the Weirdo's Book Club podcast. We are doing a very special live show as part of the London Podcast Festival. The date is Thursday, 11th of September. The date is 7pm and our special guest is the brilliant Alan Davies. Tickets from kingsplace. It's coming to London. True on Saturday the 13th of September. At the London Podcast Festival. The rumours are true. Saturday the 13th of September at King's Place. Oh, that sounds like a date to me, Harriet. Welcome to Nobody Panic with me, Stevie. And me, Tessa, a wolf. And her wolf. That was actually the impression of your dog. Oh, yeah, she does howl all the time. She's not here today, but this one is about her. It's about Piper.

My dog, it's how to have a dog. No, we did, I think a very jolly episode, a few years ago with our good friend, Liz, who just got a puppy. And this, but then I got a dog, and I thought, do part two with added stuff. Yeah. You know? More. The people want more. people want more.

So if you're just about to get a dog, thinking about getting a dog, never wish to have a dog. Hate dogs. Hate dogs, but like to hang out. Stay. Hang out with us. Hang out. Pass this one on to anybody thinking about getting dogs in your life.

It's all the dog content you could possibly want. Oh, absolutely. I won't be covering how to actually like get the dog because I think that we sort of covered that in the last one and also it's a, it's a thorny topic. But obviously there are lots of ways to get a dog. in an ethical way that we weren't going to hear because then the whole episode will be talking about that. A lot of research.

A lot of research. A lot of research. But before we do, what's your adult thing of the week, which you have done that you would like to share with me? Lower your expectations. Mine is, I passed a sale of cars. Okay. Cards, not cars.

Oh, right, right. There was a bunch of, there was a clearance sale on these cards. And I thought, I haven't got any purpose for these, but they are fun. and bought them all and they've been living in my bag and I thought, why on earth that I buy those? But then the other day a friend who was obviously, and then it was, obviously it's my birthday

on Monday and I was like, I know, but I, reader, I did not know. I did, that was new information to me. And then when she went to the loo, I got one of my cards out. I was like, yes, thank you passed me. It felt like, honestly, when I bought them, I was really into a

fugue state of being like, why am I buying these? What for? And then I was like, thank God, they were in my bag, in the cellophane, wrote it and then sign it and then it was like and when we left I was like, this is for Monday. And they were like, oh, thank you so much. And I was like, of course. I didn't forget, but I did.

Wow. I felt electric. Top tip, always carry like a lot of greetings cards in the bag. Just ambiguous cards. Ambiguous cards. Feels like this is something that you will, that sort of reinforces your

habit of like hoarding. You know, buying children's laid a hose in a car boot fairs. Yeah. It's not. In case as a child, he goes, I just need some later hosen.

It is unfortunate that there are times in my life where my chaotic approach to living does pay off and pays off hard. Really? Like eye-wateringly hard. Eye-wateringly hard. And the dopamine hit is so high that I'm like, yeah, I was right.

This is the correct way of living. But a more correct way of living would be like remembering birthdays, calendars, events, an alarm that goes off. You know, like normal people stuff. It's not normal people, but just the ongoing thing of getting, Get a diary.

Get a diary. At one point you will, maybe. Well, my adult thing, I'm going to immediately pivot because it's not really an adult thing because it was given to me, but I've kept it, is a little, because I completely forgot, before the pandemic, you know, when you're kind of like going out and about and you're like going to Pratt and you're going to all the places and then you're like getting the plastic cutlery. And I bought little cutlery to figure just to go in my bag and then a lot all. Oh, what?

And then sort of lost it or like, completely forgot about it. and then got given it as a late Christmas present for my boyfriend's like nieces, got me little wooden cutlery in a little pouch. So now, Cullery Woman strikes again. Anyway, welcome to the podcast where we solve, help, advise, guide the people through. And today it is dogs. How to look after a dog. Because I think that lots of people, well, actually, I'm saying this because I've got lots of messages on Instagram.

Thank you for everybody who messages. is me and I'm sorry if I don't reply. I do see them. Was saying like, oh, you know, every time I'd post a picture of my dog, Piper, lovely little dog, they're like, you should do an episode on how to. And it's like, well, we have done one, but I know, but it was just me being like, what's a dog and Liz being like this. And she was also right in the middle of it. Now I know. Like, because I was like, Emmett's six months old. That's fine. Now I know. That's too young to sort of know what you're doing completely in the completest sense. You've got, so we've got very good.

tips about that early stage and now I feel like she's settled down and I can confidently say other things. Lay it on me. What sort of things would you like, would you want to know? I couldn't even begin to guess. Right. To me, it's as alien as like when people have actually got a baby and they just casually have the baby and the baby and they get through the day with the baby.

Yes. I can barely get myself through the day. So the idea of getting a small thing through the day is. extraordinary to me. Yeah. So I wouldn't even know where to begin. What kind of things do people ask you? Or does it always just like, tell us more?

No, but that's actually a good place to start. Because that is what I felt like when we did the last episode. And I was talking to those just being like, I don't understand, like, how do you function? And also, how is it not dead? And also, like, just every element of it. How does it know not to poo there? Like, it doesn't understand what you're saying. So it's honestly, but I will say.

a life-changing thing because well it's like they're so much more clever than you think they are so they do get stuff but also as well

every single time they don't it's because you've done something mad like so we've last night this is a weird place to start to me there now last night for the first time

because basically we put Piper to bed in a little sort of pen area and we like shut the pen and then she falls asleep. And we were like, well, we don't want to be putting her in a pen every single night. Like, we wanted to eventually just like go to bed herself. Why doesn't she go to bed herself?

I don't understand why she doesn't just walk into her basket when she's tired, but she never does. Well, what a weird dog. And then we realize that every single night when we're watching TV or when we're doing something, and we're like, maybe it's time for her to go to bed. We pick her up and like walk her on the house going like, oh, good night, little angel. And then we put her into the bed. So the dog's like, well, you need to put me into bed. I don't know how to get to bed.

And so last night, for the first time, we just left her out to be like, maybe she'll find her way into the bed. But like, and she didn't, but she crawled up onto my grandma's chair and, like, curled up and had a lovely night's sleep there. So now I think that's going to be her bed, really. But it's like, I wouldn't know, I don't know how to do that stuff. You just have, like, try stuff. And then they, and you have to, like, do it?

Like, it's so bizarre. it's so bizarre having something relying on you to the extent that when they're young they rely on like they all I remember when she was popping was just constantly staring at her being like is she going to piss everywhere and she then would just piss everywhere and we had that so we the first thing is the toilet training is something that is very frightening and it's very like

oh god well I'd like I'd have a garden or like I've got to go down to this block of flats to go out the front so we could never like you can because they live learn and they adapt to whatever your lifestyle is. But the problem is, is that right from the start, if you don't, like, um, throw them in at the deep end, like, for example, bring them to, so I brought Piper on tour with us for a, I honestly was like, this could be an absolute disaster. But like, I had to try. There had to be a first time where I'm like, she's coming out with us, because otherwise I'm trapped and I've got a dog who doesn't know what to do when she's out the house

and she sat on the stage. I mean, she was actually very good. She's extremely well behaved. Well, that's because we did, and my friend was like, came to see a podcast episode. She's got a dog and she was like, I don't know how the dog does that. And it was like, well, because we didn't have a choice.

So really early on, like when we did our audio book, I brought her in for a day. I did a voiceover and it was like one line. And I was like, oh, I'm just going to say, can I bring the dog? And if she pisses everywhere and is a nightmare, it's one line. Like I can get that one line out. and I'll just have to deal with it.

And she didn't, but she did nearly poo in the studio, but then I didn't, because I picked up and she was like, oh, right, I stopped. And then I got out, it was really quick and really in and out, but she kind of, like, figured out how to do it. So it's basically about, like, you've got to just, like, throw them in and, like, and be really brave and be like, I'm bringing my dog to the pub. And my big thing is, like, what if, like, you're all having a drink and then someone turns up with their dog?

great the dog's here now with the drinks but actually she just sits on the she just sits there because we did loads of these things in the first few months where we like went to the pub across the road just sat there because I was like I'm going to have a dog who is able to do that and I think a big problem is sometimes is that people don't feel they can do it and they don't do it early enough so that would be like my like overarching thing of like the fear of putting your dog in these situations will mean that you won't do it for like months and months but actually you've just got to do it and then the dog will

obviously the first time will be tricky but you can find like if you look ahead and like well what's the ideal situation with this dog like do we want the dog to do I need to take the dog into the office

like once or twice a week and then you go well obviously I could never do that but it's like you'll only know that if you don't like if you do it and you have to do it and it's very obviously there's loads of that's very you know if you've got a office doesn't allow them. Fine. Obviously, you can't do that. But it's always

worth asking people because people will always, the amount of times I've done stuff or been to things and been like, can I bring the dog? They're like, they're definitely going to say now. They've been like, yeah, fine. Brought it like a wardrobe fitting the other day. People are generally like, I would love you to bring the dog. And also, if I may, you did it with such confidence, I was like, well, I guess the dog is extremely well behaved. And because you were just like, this is, we, it has to be well behaved. This has to be fine. The dog's coming to Leeds for the day? Yeah, and it was.

And I think I oft think of Pauline Quirk. Oh, don't we all? Taking place in some kind of crufts competition or something. It might not have been Pauline Quirk. It was like in the 90s and there was a show where people who did not have dogs were like, were like given the dog for the day in competing. I don't remember what the premise of the reality TV show was. But I do remember a dog handler taking Pauling Quirk aside and being like,

she knows you're scared, like down the lead. Like she can feel how tense you are. like you just have to believe, which is a good message for life in general. Oh my God. But it is just like, if you tell the dog like, is this going to be okay? The dog's like,

I don't fucking know. I'm a dog. You say it is. And you were just extremely like, she's well-behaved and she comes places. Sit there, Piper, and she did. You know, and I think you did an absolutely marvelous job

of just being like, this, you know, this is fine and acclimatizing them to things. And listen. You didn't see the bit, obviously, of course, the prep where to take her to the pub, shit's all over the pub.

Certainly, you've got to go through that. You know, listen, at Pony Club Camp one time. Hello. My mother was teaching at Pony Club Camp and there was a child with a pony. He was terrified of plastic bags. And the mother was like, we just, our whole life is just, we just don't go anywhere with, there might be a plastic bag. And everyone was like, well, that's crackers. Yeah.

They were like, we know, we just, we don't do this, we don't do this, we don't do this, we don't go near the plastic bags. And mum was like, okay. So she'd like, let the mother leave. My mum got in the stable with the pony. Tied a plastic bag around the door. The pony was like, not the bags. And my mom was like, I'm here, we're okay. And then just like stayed there with him.

And then we're like, we just leave this bag in his stable, you know? And like, 40 hours later, the mother came to collect the pony from Pony Club camp. Fine. Covered in bags. Covered in bags. Bags everywhere. Bags on his feet. Bags on his ears. Bags everywhere.

You just have to push them through the fear bit because if your life is dictated by, like, we can't do these things, you know? Absolutely. And also what's so nice about it's about it is. about it is it helps you with your life too. Like, um, there's, Piper's gone through a short period of time where she didn't like being picked up very much because I realized when, uh, when you go on the escalator and the tube and stuff, you have to, the dog can't go on the escalator, you've got to pick her up. And I didn't, I didn't, I kept like, like, underestimating how many escalators there were and also kept

being late. And so I think I was like picking her off and just like swinging her all over the place and she just, like, this is horrible. So then the other day, um, I picked her up and she, and she didn't like it. She just did a little like, hmm. And so it was like, okay, well, the, yeah, the one thing is to be like, okay, well, I guess I have to put her down and don't pick her up again. The other thing is give her a treat. Like, make it like a nice thing. Like, make it a nice experience.

And also, like, I think there's another, there's another very old-fashioned, what I'm sort of reading anyway, and I'm sure this is wrong. But there's a very old-fashioned viewpoint of, like, dogs with, like, you know, dogs, you've got to show them that you're the alpha. And there's all these, like, old-style. techniques. So like if the dog with like toilet training, something that I was terrified about and just still, I'm like, I don't understand how, like it was just so frightening. Like, how am I going to get her to not shit everywhere? I don't understand. And she did shit everywhere.

But a lot of the tips were like, don't shout at the dog for going to the toilet inside because the dog doesn't know the difference. So then you're just going to get a dog who doesn't want to go to the toilet anywhere near you ever and is frightened to go to the toilet. So what you do is, is you wait until she goes to the toilet outside or in the place you want her to go to the toilet and then you give her loads of cheese cheese or um yeah chicken or whatever the dog likes um piper's allergic to poultry so we did cheese um little things but um and salmon she like salmon anyway um and and so a nap is like the much uh slightly longer way around so in the middle of it you're like this isn't working like she's just weed again like this isn't working and then suddenly they just get it because they suddenly it's like

Like it clunks in their little brains. And when you get a dog for the first three months, I'd say, to be honest, longer, but really intensely in the first month that you have the dog. And then it gets less intense as it goes long, but it's still there. You are just like, this is like never going to, my dog's an idiot. And it's never going to understand anything. And they all have their own little things. Like, my dog's very good at sleeping at night and was always very good at sleeping at night.

Gina's dog was not very good at sleeping at night. But then also it was much more, like, anything whereas piper was really really fussy with eating so we couldn't get to eat and all that sort of stuff they've all got their own little personalities and their own things that they'll be really suddenly good at you're like why are you good at that but you can't but you shit yourself like what what um and also piper good was pap was probably bitey and the other day producer ben has got a dog and he messaged me and i was like if you have any questions or any worries message to me like and he'd message to me like and i've been like was piper quite

bitey it's like oh yes yes she was and you're going to be fine um but it was really helpful when people who had dogs said to me like that stops, like it does stop because there was a point like about four months in where I was like she's going to be like this for right and I was so upset and she wouldn't stop like she just she's not hard biting which is like exploratory biting everywhere but suddenly again it just like clunks into plays and it's all about positively reinforcing good behaviour and not being horrible and mean to them when they do it wrong I do remember you telling me the story about the positive reinforcement of

the toilet training. And you're saying like, and I was like, wow, what of course? Because they don't know, they don't know that the carpet is wrong. They've got no concept of what carpet is. They just think, weing. It's nice on their bottom. Yeah. They think weeing in front of you is the bad thing. So then they just hide and we. Yeah. Of course that's their logical thought. And then you're saying that you, if you constantly reinforce, they're like weeing on the balcony or weeing in the special area. But then when you go to the park, they won't wee because they're like, I'm not in my special area. You know, so it's like, it's those sort of jumps that you're like, of course. Like, so hard to communicate. Once you, once you've worked out the communication path of like what they

logically think, like you're saying about the hugging, you know, she gets hugs and kisses before she goes to bed. So she's like, well, they haven't started yet. So yeah, it's not bedtime. It's not bad time. I suppose I've got to, just like falling asleep, like, but like trying to stay awake because we haven't put her in the bed, so and you've got a teacher. The 45 minutes of angel kisses have happened, you know? Yeah. So it's that thing of being like, oh, this is how and, and just, yeah, what you're saying about being aware of a totally other living being. that's not you. And that step that you just said about, like,

oh, like there was a point where she was like, oh, I go to the toilet on the balcony. And because she can't go, they can't go outside until they've got all their vaccinations. And there's a little bit, which is very frustrating where they're ready to go on the floor. But like, and they're ready to go and they're desperate to walk around.

They've got so much energy. But you can't walk them because they could get like parvo virus and die or whatever. So, but then when we walked her, I was really like, yeah, she's not going to go to the toilet.

because she doesn't know that she's waiting to go on the balcony. Then, of course, you then realize that she's got a very small bladder and she'll piss herself outside when you're walking her. And then you just go crazy and give her loads of trees. And she's like, oh, so here is good too. Here is good. Oh, okay. And she still gets confused when she goes to like a flat

that doesn't have an outdoor space or doesn't have a... And she's not quite got that, like, you know, and sometimes when she gets very excited, she works herself. You kind of can understand why she does it now, whereas there was a large period of time where it was like, I don't understand why you just did a shit there. Like what? And also, you know, she'll go back sometimes, like,

they kind of regress a little bit sometimes and you're like, oh my God. And like there's a, but there are certain things that are so important. I'll just say very quickly, like they're really important. Because obviously it's like, my dog can roll over and dance. And you're like, that's great. But it also like can't come back when you call it. So if it runs into a road or die,

like, so there's like the certain things that I've found that have been very helpful. one is to because we moved specifically to an area that was better for dogs than where we were living because like there's parks and everyone's got a dog so it's a very nice little community because you can't help but meet people with dogs when you've got a dog

so then you end up like getting good tips good like you know vet tips of the best vet in the area or like a good harness we've got loads of like hand me down leads and collars and stuff from other people and like she's got a sweater that makes it look like a frog you know a lot of that A little jacket. But so that's nice.

And also if you need to go out and stuff, you can have someone to like, then you've got friends to go, can you watch the dog? And that's, yeah, that's all very helpful. So yeah, looking at the area that you're in and saying like, realistically, can I move somewhere that is better? And if not, like, what's in my area that can kind of support me

and like, you know, a park, not by a main road, that sort of stuff. But in terms of commands and stuff, like things like sit and lie down, and getting her to know her name and come when you're called is sit and lie down and she was very easy. Going her to come when you call, when she's interested in something else is so hard and we're still doing it a year in, but she's really, she's much better at it

than a lot of the other dogs that she plays with. But a lot of the other dogs that she plays with can do a lot of other fun things, but we were like got to focus on that because we were so anxious that she'd run away. and I think those like those and like and like and also yeah drop it and leave it like so and I cannot recommend enough finding like a positive reinforcement puppy trainer in your area there's one in Victoria Park and that I went to which is not in my area at all quite far away

but it was so amazing and worth it because you basically go well the one that we did was like you would take it it was so stressful and like I hated it but it would be like in a little field and there'd be like loads of other little dogs all just like different variants of just a mess just like no idea what I'm doing can't sit can't stay can't do anything just howling like and then they get and then the trainer would like um teach you like how to basically teach them what to do with distractions around but then it was basically just an hour of the dogs like just eating each other's treats and like going to each and swapping owners and stuff but eventually they start to kind of listen and you every time we've done to wrong is because we've deviated from what those guys say and like we've kind of gone like

I can't be bothered like I'm going to stop doing that thing like walking on the loose lead and all that like Piper still pulls a bit because because I was like I want to like one of the sacrifices of like taking her to places is you've got to be on time so I can't stop every time and go heal I've got to actually take her so she'd pull a bit so she's not great on the lead but like I know I know that that's my fault like it's always and I think a really unhelp things sometimes but it is helpful is to know that if your dog isn't doing something it's it's not like it's your fault but it is something there's a miscommunication it's not the dog there have this amazing dog trainer that my sister worked with with her dog and like he's like

he's called oh yeah if you're interested he's called the dog guy and he's in essex and if you have a problem dog or a dog with any behaviour problems at all he's amazing and like sorts it out he's so good. But like he really strongly believes that every single dog there's no dog that like wants to be violent and aggressive and mean. Like dogs just respond to the

stimulus that they're given and there's no like you know there's all this stuff about like if you don't do this with your dog early on it'll never learn. It's harder but you can always teach your dog even if it's six years old if it's 10 years old you can always retrain and behaviorally train

the dog. It's just a little bit trickier as they get older. But yeah, like, and I think that's a really important thing to know that it's kind of never the dogs, if you approach it with, it's not the dog's fault, it's a miscommunication between me and the dog. And you'll often find when you think like that, it's quite clear what it is. Like, we realised that we had all these, like, signals for, like, sit and stay and whatever.

And my partner was just using different words and different signals. Dog totally confused. Like, oh, yes, that will be, he was saying, wait with a finger up. I was saying, stay with a flat hand. How's the dog supposed to understand? And so, yeah, and also that's the thing, the other final thing, which is like, it does really, I've got a job because I was a bit like, I don't know, I don't know if I want kids yet or anything, but I was like, one of the big things that I'm, one of the big reasons why I don't want kids is because I'm like, oh, I'll kill it. And also I don't know what me and my partner will be like if we look after something. I have no idea. And now, for better or worse, I know exactly what we are like. I know the things that we argue about, like to do with looking after something. I know. I know the differences that we have and we're able to like

now work because it's so it's much it's as much about if you're with someone like a you know you're getting a dog with with someone it's as much about your relationship together looking after it as it is about your relationship with the dog because you end up like yeah like I mean I end up just like sort of I have to

I have to stop like backseat dog backseat dogging haven't we all constantly dogging being like sorry can you ever treat that no can you do He's like, just let me. I'm like, yes, no, true. And there's lots of things like that.

So I would say if you're considering it, and obviously, yeah, there's too many things to talk about, really. But, like, just if you are considering it and do, like, borrow my doggy and see if you've got friends with dogs, like, you know, spend time with dogs and, like, get to sort of be aware of what it would be like in the flat and get a bit of an idea. but I would like I think I'd like basically recommend it to anyone because I honestly think that it it changes your it changes your perspective in like a really positive way and if you can obviously if you are working all day and you can't afford somebody to pop in and walker or like you can't take take them into work or you don't have a pun it's much easy for me because we're both self-employed that is a legitimate reason to not get a dog because they do that they really do need FaceTime like they're really really do need to be with you and they really want to be with you. And so that's also a very good thing to do to not get one for good reasons, understood. But if you can be with them and you

can, it is a wonderful, like, really life-affirming thing to do, if genuinely the hardest thing I've ever done. Oh yeah, also freeze loads of carrots and buy a yak bar because they're amazing. If you just Google it, these yak bars. And also, ice cubes absolutely entertains them for hours. Why do they like ice cube? Because they slide all over the place until they'll chase them and like you know, and it's really good if they're dehydrated because they get dehydrated very quickly and sometimes

Piper won't drink water but she will if I put an ice cube in my hand lick that, you know? She loves licking an ice cube around a plate. Wow. And that's a day out. That is genuinely a big day out. Oh, yeah. Any more for any more? Any... Yes, final tip is

dog toys are genuinely even the best there's Kong which is like a really great brand I don't know about other dogs but like Piper just destroys them in literally like a day nothing is better than like things you've already got so like ice cubes

Tupperware she loves Tupperware Gina's dog P collects Tupperware and puts it in a little pile and things like oh yeah things like old like bottles with the um puncture it through and then put treats in

and then when they buy it around, the treats come out, a lot of fun. But you can buy professional ones of those, but Piper just eats them, so it's pointless. Also, as well, there will be a lot of things, and I'm thinking just then, because I said the word plastic, there's a lot of, like, online, I never give my dog plastic because of microplastics and because of, or like, I only feed my dog, organic, raw, you know, the dog will eat, like, what it, like, I bought all this incredibly expensive food for Piper. Turns out, not only is she, like, allergic to chicken, which we didn't, we couldn't, we couldn't, She didn't want to eat any of it.

And so the first bit was like trying stuff. So if you get a dog, don't just buy like 14 kilograms of the same food thinking it's a dog. It will eat it because it won't. You just like try lots of different things. Get health insurance. Get pet insurance for the dog because it's the most expensive thing in the world when something goes wrong.

I'm on Waggle, which is fine. Very nice. But fine. They're all a bit of a racket because it's insurance. But, yeah, and toys are kind of bullshit. So don't worry about getting like a million toys. And when you get to the bottom of a peanut butter jar and you've got like not very much left,

just giving them that. That's the day. You know, an ice cube and the peanut butter jar, that's a day. So yeah, they're my like, I mean, I've got a million others. She can't get a whole nose into the bottom of a peanut jar. Maybe I'm not thinking, maybe you're working not with whole earth crunchy. Yes, I'm not going whole. us crunchy, I'm going sort of short and short and stout.

Yeah, not the glass at conical. No, I don't give her that. I eat that. Right. As in, I lick that. That's a day for me. Yeah. The fair of you. What a day out. Lovely. You know, give it a go. If you're not doing it because you're like, oh, I don't think I'll

be able to do it rather than circumstantially, then do give it a go. Because it is like, it is lovely. It's a really nice thing. and if there's like if your dog has problems or as like you know you need extra help there's so many places and so many people the like trainers are amazing and you can yes it's money but like you can and it is that's final yeah it is money it's expensive to have a dog if you've got um vet insurance and health insurance then it's better but like it's not like you pay up front and then you never pay anything again because also you're like want to give a little treat want to buy a little fun thing for it and like and then you're like oh she's thrown

up. Yeah. I do, I have heard of that of like people being like, oh, we're saving up to buy this thing and then being like, the dog ate some Lego. Yes. Oh my. So that's that. Piper had a dormant. Well, that's one of the reasons. Yeah, a few times I've not been able to do stuff because with, or record stuff because I, yeah, she had a dormant. She had half, half our dormant. And I came in and she was like really, like, small looking and like jumped on my name as all like, when I was like, why are you being weird? Like, I think very. cuddly but in a weird way and then there's loads of like holes in the dormant

and I was like I don't know because my tortoise at a kitchen sponge and then I'm sure that's fine and then I called the vet and they were like when did she do it? I was like about half an hour ago and they're like you need to bring her in immediately otherwise she'll die and I was like okay

and then they gave her this injection she threw up just door mat for like an hour and it cost £100 pounds and that's fine but like very lots of things that you don't expect. The Lego, uh, two grand. Two grand to get the Lego out. Yeah, right. So that they will have tried, the vomit.

Didn't work. Yeah, it wasn't coming up. Oh my God. That is yeah. That is yeah. That was the noise that the dog, the dry heaving dog. Oh yeah. The cough. That was me. I was and I was being sick at the, yeah, the thought of paying two grand to get the Lego out. But yeah. Yeah. My boyfriend bought Piper a bone because he was like dog bone. Dog's like bone. Dobs like bones. and Piper was allergic to the bone and had to go to hospital for three nights and it cost, yeah, two and a half grand. And then the vet was like, well, don't give her a bone.

And it was like, I'm sorry, everything about growing up and everything society tells me. They love bones. They love bones. And she fucking loved the bone. But then the bone did not love her. Yeah. Nearly died.

Listen, there's obviously so much more weeks. Maybe we'll join round three, you know. Round three for the patrons. Have you had a dog dog? Have you had a dog long? Did she come this time last year? She came. She was, well, she was, it was her first birthday last week.

She was, we got her at eight weeks. So, yeah, May. So it's, um, pretty much, yeah. And honestly, it's been, I hope it fills you with some confidence that you go into it with your eyes open. Your eyes and your wallets open. Oh, yes. And also that like, yeah, believe in yourself and that you get, you know, you get through it. And I have noticed a real change in you.

Just look a bit more tired. More tired. More poor. No, no, no. I mean, you're like, really like, you're just like, this is how, I'm doing this now. Yeah, that's very nice to know. Yeah, because I do feel like that. I'm bringing this dog and it's happening and it's fine and the dog's there. Yeah.

You're not apologising for anything. You're very in control and you're like, I have a well-behaved dog and also you're like trust in yourself of being like, yeah, I can do it. Yeah, that is true. It does help you trust yourself. Thank you ever so much for joining us. I hope if you are thinking about getting a dog or you've just got a puppy and you're thinking, oh shit.

Tweet as a picture. Firstly, tweet as a picture. And secondly, I hope this gives you some confidence and some hope. They're like, you're doing great, and you just hang in there, and, you know, a lot of the early puppy stuff passes and nobody panic. And or if there are people in your life thinking about going to dogs, send them this. Or if you're simply never ever going to get a dog, nice to hang out for a bit, wasn't it? Thanks for staying for the amount of time you did. It's nice to go all the way to the end.

And, yeah, if you have any suggestions or things you'd like to hear more about, more specific dog work or others. We do all kinds here. Do get in touch At Nobody PanicPonicpodcast Oh At Nobody PanicPonick pod is the Twitter Nobody Panicpodcast At gmail.com is the email

I met Tessa Coates She's at Stevie Amber the S Hold on to your hats It's a five What And that's all the places We love to hear your suggestions Please do write to us

And join us next time Yay! That was great There you go Bye Burmese