Nobody Panic - How To Spring Clean

Episode Date: February 19, 2019

Think tidying is boring? It is. But Tessa has watched Marie Kondo and read some other stuff so you don't have to. This episode also involves a bizarre story about an owl. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/nobodypanic. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, I'm Carriad. I'm Sarah. And we are the Weirdo's Book Club podcast. We are doing a very special live show as part of the London Podcast Festival. The date is Thursday, 11th of September. The date is 7pm and our special guest is the brilliant Alan Davies. Tickets from kingsplace. It's coming to London. True on Saturday the 13th of September. At the London Podcast Festival. The rumours are true. Saturday the 13th of September at King's Place. Oh, that sounds like a date to me, Harriet. house. How mentally and emotionally cluttered are you? In order, quite messy and probably quite a lot. Welcome to this

episode on spring cleaning. It's like when Rattie and Mole do it in Wind and the Willows. No, he's whitewashing. No, is he spring cleaning? I'm struggling to get a purchase on that memory. And I'll answer your question. I feel like he's doing a spring clean.

Mole wants to spring clean or one of than once the spring. Anyway, I was obsessed with spring cleaning when I was little. Isn't in that episode that we did that very mainstream relatable episode about how to be a witch? Yes, of course. And we talked about how spring was like, you know, a time of

rebirth. A time of like getting rid of all the latent business that you need to do and just go ahead with it. So spring cleaning, that's why it's in spring. It must have like historical connections somewhere. I think it's just a Well, we've just had Chinese New Year.

Oh, yeah, of course. And that's a, it's very popular. Then it's a, yes, you spring clean. You totally, you completely prepare yourself for the new year. Great. Start whenever you fancy. What is your adult thing of the week? My adult thing is, and I think you can do this if you're a kid,

but I've never done it. And I was like, oh, is then I had an MRI. Don't worry, I'm fine. And when you go online and look at what an MRI is, you just there were just loads of people being like I'm having it, right of my way, I can't, oh my God, oh my God, I freaked out and it's, oh my God, it's awful. And I was, well, when I was told what it was,

I was like, I'm fine, you just go into a thing and then they scan you. He's going to a metal tube, you slide on it in, like an incinerator, and then you slide on out, what's the problem of that? What's the problem? And my mum is very claustrophobic, and she had one a while back, and she really struggled with it. And then, and then as it got closer, I was like, oh my God. and then I started asking loads of people questions who I knew had them being like, do they close it off either end of the tune?

And do they? No. So your feet are out? You can see your feet. I think it would just clarify at this juncture that Stevie has a bad shoulder. I'm so sorry, yes, I have a bad shoulder. Well, technically, apparently I don't. No one knows what's wrong with it. So they got an MRI to see if, I don't know, my bone had fallen out or something. I wasn't quite clear on that.

And I had two, so the whole thing less like 40 minutes, which I genuinely, again, that was a surprise to me. Did they slide you into the tray? and out and then back in again. And back in again. So I had 20 minutes out, 20 minutes. And I had my neck done as well, which meant that they basically they put like these two pillows

sort of foamy things either side of me. Then they put the camera. Because the camera's like a, it sort of looks a bit like a cast almost. They like put it over my neck or under my neck or just around my neck. And then, or to, that might not have been the camera, but it was certainly something that was very important.

And then they put this mask like a grate over my face. and then that was the moment where I was like silence to the lambs-esque It was incredibly like sound to the lambs Gosh and then she's like don't move and it's like I mean I can't and I don't want to go in and then they're like it's very loud and everyone keeps saying about

the loudness and I was like I'm actually now shitting myself I got slid in if you're getting it on like your knee or your leg you don't have to have to go in it's just your knee or your leg that goes in but obviously it was like my neck and my shoulder up so my face had to go in so I went all the way in and then the noises were quite fun

Right. So they're all like a rhythmic honks, beeps. At one point it just sounds like someone's just like hitting the outside of the machine for a bit. Maybe they are, maybe they've no idea how the machine works. And they're just like, bomb, bomb, bomb, bam, bam, ba. That's what it sounds like, do, do do do do do do. And they're like, we've paid all this money for the samurai machines. It's so, it was so weird. It was too embarrassed to say we don't know it works. Because it wasn't, there was also, it wasn't like it had loads of weird, weird beeps, but then they settled to get into a cycle. There was no cycle. I couldn't.

Even going in second time, I was like, well, it's never made that, or it was before, what I was doing that? I find it quite funny. And also then, it was very, very loud, but it's not like, it would have been worse if it had been heavy metal music, you know? Certainly. Could you sit up if you wanted to?

You're given a little thing to press if you want to come out of the machine, and then someone immediately... zooms you out. Zooms you out. But height-wise, if you sat up in there. No, not. It's like hits. Oh, no.

Yeah, it's very, very close. So it's very, the top of the tube is very close to your head. I got it done at this place in Waterloo, Vista Health, you have to pay, because the NHS wouldn't give me one. And then they aerate it, so you're not like, what's the word you can breathe, and it's very light in there,

because there's a huge hole at the top of your head and a huge hole at the bottom of your feet, so it doesn't, it's not dark. Even in those, you know, films, when they go down like a tunnel. Oh, no, I hated it. I can't cope with that. There's a bit in Kill Bill, too,

where she gets buried alive in a coffin, I couldn't watch it, and I don't watch it, because it's just too much. But it was actually... At the coral reef, of course, the swimming centre. There's three rides. The python, the anaconda and the... MRI and the MRI tube.

No, the boa constrictor. Okay. And then people used to tease people and be like, no, no, no, the boa constrictor is the baby one. The anacondra is the worst one. So if you've done the underconi, you're like, oh, I can totally do the boa constrictor. No.

The bobo constrictor is you set up at such speed that you ricochet, it then goes at a 90 degree angle straight down. but you're going so fast that you hit the other side of the tube and then you're literally like bang bang bang all the way down and then you just like you're going and it is so tight and so fast and so dark it's horrendous and then you're like launch out the bottom and then the bonus straight to pool is just full of like completely traumatised kids sort of like floating and everyone has to be like got out with a stick so traumatised handing valium to children that get out as they're like sort of

carted off it's absolutely horrendous oh my god so that's not like that great you know you did very so well thank you it's all about perspective and that's what I've learned doing this podcast. I think that's very, very brave of you. Well done. Thank you. What's yours? Mine's that I bought a pillowcase from the White Company. I mean, that is very adult. It's very grown-out. How much was it?

Loads of money. I was received a present from the White Company for Christmas that I did not want. Great. So I took it back. And then after looking around the White Company for a long time. I imagine, because you want to get your money's worth. You want to get your money's worth. But then it's the White Company, and it's very difficult.

got to get your money's worth because it's quite expensive. Yes. Good quality. Lovely stuff. Do please send us more things, the white company, if you fancy. But yeah, no, I thought one pillowcase was. Can you give like a build-it-up piece at a time? Like a ballpark price.

Like, it's not this, because it might be this. It was bigger than a breadbox and smaller than a car. Right. So, like, okay, you're looking at like a 10 grand. It was a 20-pound pillowcase. Yeah, that is a lot of money for a pillowcase. Definitely. But it's certainly not a lot of money in general.

Like it's not like 200 pounds for a piller case. No, no, no. Does your face feel nice when you're lying on it? It does feel very nice. Okay, that's good. Yes. Lovely. I mean, I don't have any more questions.

Being adult is boring. Very boring. Right. So obviously it's going to be about spring cleaning, tidying, uh, re-assessing your space. If you're like, boring, I don't want to know. Get in because I think you will find something useful. Yeah.

Stay with me. How close to Maricondo's Netflix special is this? It's close. Right, so if you watch Maricondo special, still listen, because Tessor will put her own spin on it, sure. I just thought we have to credit where... Oh, I don't think I wasn't going to credit her. I know you were, but I won't, I just can't, I know it's supposed to be very good.

I just can't watch a Netflix special about tidying when there's, like, other stuff on. I can't do it. I've actually also not watched that many of them. Okay, oh my God, there's more than one. I thought there's just one. Oh, no. Okay. Isn't what Netflix says well

like a stand-up special? No, it's a series. Oh, right, okay. Called tidying up a series. They're like an hour long. Also, she's a lot younger than I thought. Oh, yes, that's very popular. A lot of people wrote to me to say that as well.

Oh, great. That they thought she'd be like that. Keep writing to test and I write your thoughts. I love it. And I'm sorry that I don't always have the wherewithal all technological know how to respond. But don't think I'm not, don't think I'm not thinking it. Grandma's reading.

She just ain't reply. Maybe she read it. She readin hard. So she loves when you write to her. And so if you have read Maricondo's work, seen the show, you'll know it's all about, like, sparking joy. Marie's method and also, like, the general idea of spring cleaning and regrouping is to be like, what do I actually want in my life and around me? Because I think we're having a real sort of cultural shift, because it used to be always like,

get rid of anything in your wardrobe that you haven't worn in six months. Do you wear that? No, it's do it small, get rid of it. Like, it was just very like, clean, clean, don't hold on to anything, which can only make you feel always a failure. Like it's always like, oh, I can't get rid of it, I can't get rid of it, but it was just like, why can't I be better? And I should be able to get it in the bin if I haven't worn it. Whereas really, we hold on to all sorts of things for all sorts of different reasons.

Yeah. And it's about tuning in, the concept of like sparking joy is like tuning into that, like, why do I hold on to this item that I really don't have a constant use for? Also, sorry, I will just say, just have to bob in and say, if you hear some sort of banging sounds, I've just heard them a little bit. It's Dr. Alison Parker is walking up and down the hallway, or as we call it, the Torto Barn. and she's smashing her shell she's headbutting the skirting board

so I'm really sorry she's been locked out the room because she was making such a loud noise so loud anyway please continue just I wanted to explain now because I could start hearing her shell yes so it's not just about this like get rid of all your stuff why do you have so many things it's about being like becoming more in tune with like what kind of person am I these are my things that spark joy

not feeling any shame about being like actually I'm a person that collects you know stuffed penguins I collect them and I refuse to be ashamed of that and I'm going to put them out on display Because they make me happy. Because they make me happy. There's no point keeping them in a box under the bed and be like, I can't get rid of these.

I'm like, put them out then. Right. Get them out there, baby? God, it is already. I was like, when Tesla's suggested, so I was like, all right, tidying, fine. I'm already like, right, yeah, that's true. I've got too many coats, but I like them.

Yeah, and if you truly like them, and so we're going to definitely approach what to do about the too many coats. Yeah. Don't panic. But also, if you've got too many coats, you're like, I like coats. So shoot me.

I like myself a coat. I love coat. So it's about being in tune with, thank you. Oh, yeah, yeah, I need that. I love Martin. It's about both being in tune with, like, A, accepting that you like, you like coats. And if they truly spark joy, like, keep them out. And secondly, being like, why do I buy a lot of coats?

I tell you. I tell you. Tell me. I like the fact, so I don't like the idea that you can wear an outfit. And then when you go out, you put the same coat on every day. So you just look the same every day. Whereas I like being able to, like, shift and change my look. Okay.

So, um... This is truly news to me. It's news, right. I get very bored with things very quickly. Yes. So if I wear one coat every single day, that's my winter coat. Then I just feel like I look the same every day. Understood.

I get quite bored with it. Yes. So I've got like different coats to suit my moods. Like I'm feeling quite spicy. Absolutely. And I think you're very clearly very in tune and you don't need to get rid of them. Great. So if your instinct is to be like, oh, I've got too many coats.

I'm like, no. You've got loads of coats. Yes. Okay. Great. Is there something that you think? oh and you're making that sort of you can't see me but I hope this visually is coming across oh I've got this and I'm wrink I'm all wrinkled up like a little prune and yeah I've

kept some soft toys that my ex-boyfriend got me okay do you want to touch him with why you think they're still here because I feel sorry for them because it wasn't their fault yes he gave them to me do you love them no okay I'm looking at him now as a penguin if you love him keep him do love him that's a hundred 100% fine. Okay. He doesn't need to be a place of... See, look at you.

You like him. I do like it. So it's about like... So if you sort of came out of it with a logical mind, you're like, I don't need this penguin. And it's not about that. Right, great.

It's about being like... And it's also about getting rid of that mindset of like, that was the thing that you're like, I shouldn't have these things anymore. It's like, keep him. You love the penguin. I do love the penguin. He sparks joy.

He does. He looks very happy. He looks at him. He's right there. He's all cute. Yeah, we're recording in my bedroom. so you can just see all the clutter everywhere. But there's things

so, okay, so we'll deep dive further, but as a broader thing, the thing about clutter, you know when you go into somebody else's house or somebody else's workspace and there's like paper everywhere and like boxes on the floor and like pictures that haven't been hung up yet. Just just looking around my bedroom.

I'm actually not. I am, I am. But that is true. But also I am just thinking, but it is also very much a human universal. Of course. You're going to like someone's spare room. They're like, don't look in there. That's like, that's like, that's it.

You shove everything in the wardrobe that is like, the moment you're open, everything falls out. Yeah. And so you just like, close that. Like, I'm not going in. And so if you, so imagine you go to someone else's house and you, they were like, and you said to you like, off you go. You can go and work for the day.

Is it like go and do your business in this spare room beside this like exercise bike and like all this stuff. You'd be like, this is not a conducive work in the environment. Right. Like this is not a good thing. Psychologically, I feel cluttered now. psychologically this isn't good. And so it's so easy when it's someone else's stuff

to be like, this is clearly not a good space. But we do it to ourselves. We're like, this is fine. This is absolutely fine. Yes, of course. And also because we're like, so in this bedroom, for example, you probably know where everything is.

Yes. And so you've got a system. Sometimes like, where's the hair type? It's on the floor. I know where it is. Where I keep it. Obviously. On to the penguin.

So you know where stuff is. It's not about this like, and so it's like, it's working. But it's just about being like, you're right, it would be better if it was like, a more an open space for me. Like when you're walking to a hotel room and you're like,

yeah, that is the best. And also when you move into a new place, it is like that and then you add your stuff to it. And then you're like, well, I don't like that anymore. It's all gross. Yes, yeah, that's true. So the thing is it always about, and the reason that like Maricondo claims that it's like,

you can tidy up once and never, ever again, that you'll never tidy again. So linguistically, it's just a way of being like, you tidy up once and then always you return things. great to their home I see and that's what we all would like to be like and maybe like a couple of days afterwards maybe a couple of weeks and pick up of a month then gradually you go back to your old ways and that's the thing of maybe you've got to always try and make sure that you don't that you do put the stuff back it's quite realistic though so later in the book when you're like already deep into the cult sure she says the way to like find the home for something is to like hold it in your hands and wait for it to tell you like yeah that fun that difficult understood. Yeah. Sorry.

But like, it is sort of, if you keep something for a while, you have to be like, okay, where does this want to live? And like put it in different places. In my shoe.

In my shoe. And then eventually you will find a face. I'm like, yes. It is there. Okay. That's exactly where that should live. Okay.

Okay. So there's some big sweeping things. One is that everyone says, I haven't got enough space. Oh, yeah, constantly. I haven't gone on a space, but you will fill,

I don't know if anyone was ever been to a stately home. You will fill the space you have. Yes, that is true. People will just people, you could have a million rooms and everyone's like, sorry, that's hats, don't look in there. There's no like, oh my goodness, what if I was rich, if I had more space?

Yeah, he's so minimal. Yeah. The only people that have those houses are people that don't really live in them, they're like, they're just Pierre d'Hairs, which is the word I discovered recently. It doesn't mean my bachelor pad? I think. It means, you know, so when, like, people are aware in business and they have like a place in London for whenever they're in London.

Yes. But it's not their home. But it's skitted out. It's furnished. It has been furnished, but not by them. It's got no character whatsoever. and probably someone cleans it twice a week. Yeah, and then when you go in it, you're like, oh my God, your house is amazing.

Because all you're thinking is, my house has loads of me in it, and this is really nice. That's why I wish that I could live in. But actually, it'd be a bit cold. So cold. Also, there's no joy there. There's no joy. They haven't put a single thing out that sparks joy.

Like those TV detectives who, like, their home lives are falling apart, and they're, like, separated from their wife because they were married to their job. Of course. And then they're living in, like, a little flat. The crime. The crime. That's the true crime of the story. And they're living in, like, some shit flat.

and then they haven't put any pictures upon the wall and nothing is nice about the situation so they're never going to you're never going to solve the crime until this resolve the crime in their heart yes exactly right and so if you're someone who's like oh who cares especially if you're like I'm only living in this flat

for a year or whatever you're like you live in a year yeah there's some stuff on the wall for Christ I have some self-respect man I'm god damn self-respect you must like something if you like don't really like our yes you do like you've seen something that you liked ever. You have a photo

that you like. Just put one photo on the wall. For God's sake, take some ownership of your space and be like, and therefore it's like touching in to be like who and that's why you see like those broken detectives being like, forget it, I don't need anything. I don't know any people, I don't know any stuff. You're like, yes you do. But it's scary and hard to do because you're like, who am I? Yeah. What is my taste? And what if, yeah, exactly. And then like you always say that you have very poor taste, but I don't think you've actually been given the chance to tell whether you've got poor taste or not.

Thank you so much. The one time you did you had a very nice bedroom that you did. So it's like, it's quite, very nice. I've got in my bedroom, we've got like, one side of the wall is the shadows side to kind of put it up. And the side is mine. But on my side, it's still all stuff that he's bought because he was like, you like that?

I've been like, yeah. And I have no ownership over it because I didn't insert myself into that. I was like, I don't know what's box joy. I don't know. she's just hitting me across the face I know

it was on the knee nicely nice everyone we're touching something exactly right that is like you put up stuff that someone else gave you

like I guess this is nice and trendy and tasteful and it's scary to be like to put something up especially in a space that you share with someone else and be like what's that

yeah it's like dog picture yeah I guess it's a thing I like actually yeah it's my soul yeah and like

ugh boo Obviously it's scary, but you just got to be the better you are at finding out those things that spark joy. And they're not just pieces of art. They're literally everything in your life and taking ownership of it. So that when you go to like, you know, your roller skating class and everyone's like, why do that? And then you're like, because I like it. I love roller skating, right?

Yeah. Also, I think people listening often, you think that only have things in your life that spark joy immediately. I'm like, well, I can't afford that. But actually you can't cheap things to spark joy. Yes. And also, you already have them in your house. You have already collected things. Yeah.

There's a buying as a new stuff. This is not about going and starting afresh with getting new stuff. Like, they are already there. You don't have to get a white company pillowcase if you don't want to. If you don't want to. But if you have a voucher there and you've got to buy something. You've got a voucher then, absolutely. What else are you going to do?

Good Lord. Yes, so you stop freaking out about not having any space. You're then going to give yourself plenty of time. Okay. Like some real time. Like two days. Yes. And definitely do not be like, I'll do that today.

And then I'll have a dinner party tonight. And everyone will be so impressed. Right. No. No, no, no, no. You need to have so much time and be doing it in your, take it nice and calmly. And because if people are coming over, you will have a put it in a bin bag, just put it, just get it clean, just get it out of here. You know, and you'll never fully commit to it.

So that's the thing. One, give yourself loads of time. And two, do it in the stages and you can think the stages are boring. But is that Alison? That's Alison Parker's shell. Go on. She's having a play. Right.

What are the stages? They are clothes, books, books, stuff. Sure. So the clothes book stuff, memories. Memories. And we leave memories till the end. Because if you just start now, 100% you'll get out,

you'll find immediately like your old school book. And then you'll be sat on the floor crying. And you're Instagramming it as well. And then the day is lost. So when you see those things, just close them, put them to the side. We're not ready yet. So you start with clothes to get your muscles in.

Put the muscles in your body. Yeah. And then when you're ready and strong, you can approach your memories. But you're not ready yet. So everything out of the wardrobe, all you have your clothes, absolutely everything.

everything in the whole house, put it on the bed. Oh my God. All your coats, all your 107 coats. Everything. Wardrobe completely clear. And if you're like, oh, but like I know I'm keeping that dress. So like, I'm just going to keep it out. Nope. Get it out. Get it out. Then you clean the wardrobe. Okay.

Get it all completely cleaned and realize like how much dust is in there and how much like you're just sort of living in your own sort of filth. Lovely. A family of moths. Yes. And there's so much stuff there on the bags and they're like, what's even in this? I've got a bucket in my wardrobe with some string in it. Of course you have to be. clothes on the bed, clean the wardrobe, think, oh, lovely. Then all of your clothes, and you can do this with a pal,

all of the clothes into categories. So, jeans together. Just, I'm trying to think of the way to say this. I don't want to be your pal to do that. Don't worry. Imagine me like, do you want to come around? I'm like, yeah, great. They're like, right, we're sorting out my clothes into categories.

I'm just like, I want to kill myself. Yeah, I have actually asked people, and everyone has said the same thing. So maybe nobody, because I think it's, I think it's really fun. Because it's your stuff. No, no, no, I wouldn't mind doing it for someone else, I don't think. I think the idea of it's nice. Yeah. When it's like, give up your Saturday to go and look at Tess's dresses.

Stevie, I'm 100% on board. You completely, thank you. Okay, so do it alone. Okay, there's no way. Nobody wants to be your pal. Full 180. A full 180. At best, your mum might help.

Yeah, I think moms probably will help. Because especially if... For some reason, there's some sort of relationship. They're more into your stuff. Yeah, because they'd be sort of telling you to get rid of your stuff your entire life. Don't like flying your mum over from like New Zealand. Guys, it's a so... Again, it's solo.

You're alone. Okay. Maybe tell someone you're doing it and maybe they can drop off a soup. If they wanted to. If they fancy. No prash. Or not. Okay.

You're completely alone. You're hungry and alone. You're hungry and alone. It's a solo adventure. Okay. So now you're hungry, you're alone And all of your clothes are on your bed What a weekend you're having?

But your wardrobe is completely clear Right, right So keep looking at that if you feel sad If you feel sad, it looks lovely and look So now they're all on the bed And the idea of that, of course, is that You literally can't get into the bed Until the clothes are moved

Stop you napping Yeah, basically But of course, if you've ever got this far And given up in the past You'll know that you'll just move those clothes To the floor And then return to that every day and then live in that sort of backwards and forwards for the next four to eight months.

Oh yeah. So plough through. Okay. If you can forage your snack, now's the time. Great. Right. Close into categories. Now we've got all of your jeans, all of your t-shirts, all of your stripy tops.

You all defined if you are me that you owned 107 pairs of cotton pants from Marks and Spence's spencer and 12 black and white stripy tops. That's not surprised. No. Or you like me, you've got 20 coats. Or 20 coats. And so many Marks and Spencer's black tights, many of them still in there. packet. So clearly in like moments of crisis, I've been like, this will fix this.

Yes. Some nice new tights. It is lovely. Put some new tights on and socks and pants. So then you start to check in with yourself and be like, huh, I see that I own too many of these things. And now that everything's in categories, some things, if you just pass them and they can immediately go brilliant, they're gone straight into the charity bag. Yes. If they're going to make more than 20 pounds, put them on eBay. If it's going to make less in your heart, just give it. way. Do you just give it to charity? If it's soiled, I hate that word, because that sounds

like you've just shat on them. Yeah, so if you've shot on them. If you've shot on them, I think it's been time, isn't it? Or there are various trade, make some lovely bunting, or T-R-A-D trade, do clothing, recycling. So they'll take your soil stuff, everything, and they're the ones who, I guess, make bunting with it

or whatever, or they use the zips, like, you know. Oh, great, okay. So that's somewhere you can disdeposit stuff that can't be sold. Okay, do that. So look into places like that, and then like, bras for Africa, basically you can send your bras to, pretty much everything in your house apart from your pants,

which you could sell to, like, weirdos if you fancy. Yeah, Japanese businessman. Could be. Yeah. You're just looking at your classics and you're like, there's still so much shit here. You know, when you've got like, you got a t-shirt and it's shit and you don't like it. It's like, oh, I'll wear that for bed.

I've just got a drawer full of like just crap t-shirts I don't like. So keep an eye on that. So you're like, oh no, but it's comforting. You're like, yeah, but you can see, still feel nice when you're comfy. You don't have to feel like an absolute slop. Yeah. Also like I was wearing like hoodies from like plays I did in

uni that didn't have a nice time doing. Great. And then I'm like get rid of them. Get rid. Why do you keep them? Yeah. Great. Weird. Lovely. School uniform is a weird one. There is a company that make your school uniform into cushions and things. Or you can make minted quilts. You can do other stuff with it. Otherwise it does just live, you know, in a cupboard.

Either way, those sort of things that aren't everyday wear, just get them folded in the corner they're not to be dealt with right now. They're out of the way. Now we're looking at your everyday stuff. And now we're looking at like, oh, you've clearly got a problem. You own 27 blue jumpers. Like, clearly this is the thing.

And now we start to touch him with sparking joy. Because now we're like, okay, you want to, rather than being like, oh, what shall go? Be like, what shall be saved? If you're like, what's my favourite thing here? Like, if I was getting dressed for my office photo, like, what's my best stuff? So stuff is like fine, but it's not like your most precious thing.

Like, let it go and be someone else's most precious thing. Right, yeah. Let it go. Like, have just stuff that you're like, these are my most precious belongings. Yeah. You know? And if you're like, oh, I obviously like white shirts, but none of these are quite right, it's like, well, go and find one perfect white shirt and let all these white shirts go.

Yeah. You know? And so there is a woman called Courtney Carver who does something called Live with Less. and she invented something called the 33 for three method, which is only having 33 items of clothing for three months. Christ, okay. Yeah, so you literally count out 33 things. Okay.

Underwear not included, pyjamas not included. Otherwise, everything else, including, like, tights are, like, still up for grabs. Go through this experience, like, the house is on fire, or, like, you can only choose your 33 things. Or like, okay, what am I saving? Like, what are my most precious things? And what do I use, like, all the time, et cetera, et cetera. And then her thing is that for three months, you know, you know,

you keep everything else under the bed or like out of the way. And then the idea is like when you get them out again, you're like, oh yeah, I didn't actually use that. And also I didn't need to use it. I appreciate I didn't need it. I wasn't thinking. And also, you know, when you like that kid's gang where you hide things under a teetown and you try and guess what's there.

Oh yeah. If you can't, do you know. I do to play at Brownies. Yes, classic Brownies number. What were they doing with us at brownies? They must have run out of activities. They were, yeah, I only got like three badges because I just didn't see the point in it. I can tell that you have to get an extra sash.

Rarely have I felt more scenes, do you? Yes. Yes. Just thinking about brownies. Anyway, so now if you imagine that, like, your stuff in the wardrobe is under the tea towel, what can you actually, like, bring to mind that's like, you don't have to do it right now.

I probably only wear the same 10 things over and over again, just in different combos. And then I buy something, and then that kind of goes in for a bit, and then I get bored of it, then it disappears again. But then there's always that thing when, like, you're going through me, you're like, yes, but what if I do get invited to the BAFTAs, you know?

Okay. But then deal with that when it happens. When it happens. Fantastic. Fantastic. So you've touched on a crucial thing, which is the fear of the future, guilt about the past. Oh God, yeah.

So it's the fear of like, but what about the BAFTAs? You know what? When you're invited to the BAFTAs, get yourself a dress. Because you won't want to wear that dress because you haven't worn it in ages. So why would you want to wear the dress

that you clearly don't want to wear? You know, suddenly go, and that's perfect for the BAFTAs. Exactly. If you actually go to TK. Max and get a new dress for the BAFTAs. You'd be so excited. you, and that one would be like, you promised the BAFTAs. Oh my God, don't.

So let him go and be someone else's BAFTA dress, you know. So like, you will cross those bridges in the future. Like, especially, you know, whatever your things are. You're like, especially the sort of oh, one day I'm going to lose all the weight and then I'll wear these tiny child's hot pants or whatever. You know what? Let it go.

Yeah. It's better. It's better for the hot pants, you and everyone that you don't wear those hot pants. It's better for everyone. Don't hold on to them because then they're just a constant reminder of like the person that, you know, your knowledge. Failure. Yeah. So keep just as a constant like,

oh, this is who I am and here are all my treasures. And then the guilt about the past is like, oh, that was a present from my, that was a present from so and so.

Yeah. This is the thing I think I should keep. Oh, that was a memory. But your hoodies that you're like, oh, I should hold onto these hoodies

from plays I didn't enjoy. Yes, I really. Why are they in the house? I also have lots of clothes that, you know, and you're like, that'd look great on someone else. Yeah.

Give it to someone else then. Yeah. And if you like, you actually know who that person is, go and give it to them. Yeah. You know, and be like, I did that with books. When I finished a book, I'm like, that person would love it. I just give it away to them.

And then everyone's like, thank you. What an absolute treasure. I'm thrilled to have this book. That's true. And then once you've got into that zone of, I can only wear this many things every day, which is my favorite, which one do I actually look best in? Then once you've got into the habit of that, then you're ready to go and approach everything else in the house.

Then you're ready to be like, do I actually need all of this, you know. And that should be easier because it's very unlikely you look, and you're like, I've got 25 lamps if you don't need them. Possibly you are someone who like, if you do have 25 lamps, you've been like, clearly, I love a lamp. Clearly, I love...

The illumination it brings. I love illumination. And then it's like, why? Is it just I love lamps? Are you a dark soul? Are you a dark soul? Do you just like light in the house? Is it like you're looking for something in particular

and you still haven't found it? So these lamps are close to what it is you're looking for, but not it? Like, what is it about that? Yes, we've got so many books and Blu-rays that you can't move for them in the flat. And we will never get rid of them because he hasn't read any of them because that obviously takes longer than it does to just buy one. Yes, fantastic.

Because I've got about 10 books in the house and they're on rotation all the time. I give them away when I'm finished with them because I'm just like, I don't need them anymore. So yeah, because I was like, there's nothing like that in the flat and you're like, okay, it's absolutely loads. Yes. Yeah. So that, you know, like 25 lamps or an entire hallway full of books. that Alison Parker's company ramming her head into. She really likes them. She really likes

autobiographies. Yeah. And similarly when you do the kitchen, which you one day will get to, like, everybody will find that they have you know, they have 18 half open packets of spaghetti. Yeah. There's loads of herbs. So many herbs. And the same herbs as well. I've only got basil. Yeah. Loads of basil because every time you're in the supermarket, you're like, probably get some basil. Yeah. But you don't use the basil. You just like the idea of the basil. Oh, mugs. Loads. Loads. I think Mugs is the thing in the kitchen

because you get, if you don't know someone very well at work, and it's like Secret Santa, you get them a mug. Do you ever go out and buy a mug? Like, I feel like you're just given mugs or you inherit mugs. Nobody buys himself a mug. It's very difficult. A mug is only given. A mug is only given. And we brought like a set of six

that match. And we never used them because the mismatched what are these mugs are always the ones that are being used all the time. Why is that? I don't know. I think that is probably guilt of the past, isn't it? Because you're like, well, that you know that was given to me by my uncle I don't know. Do you feel like the nice mugs that you bought are too precious? No actually I don't think I have a problem

with them I only own one mug that's a mug with dogs on it and uh so my mum book got it for me I think and uh I really like it and I only use that mug and then we have 24 other mugs okay so get let some mugs go me and the shadow are going to have to have a chat yeah let some mugs go yeah sidebar here obviously into of course this is a solo experience don't do it for other people. Oh God, my mom would occasionally just throw away stuff that she was like, I've got a hole in it or something. I'd be like, that was my PJ & Duncan t-shirt.

Yeah, no, that's never happened. Yeah, of course, sorry, yeah. Whereas my grandma is... I want to get the owl in the freezer. No. Not a sheet. I do want to sort of pop in and say that the owl wasn't harmed, but I don't think anyone knows.

Yeah, I was already dead. You're a dead owl and the freezer. lived on the water on Vancouver Island. I went to stay with her. We've been to pick some berries. She said, I've got a Ziploc bag somewhere. Open the freezer. Got a Ziploc bag out of the freezer

that had a dead owl in it. Tipped the dead owl into the bin, rinsed the bag under the tap. Put the berries in it. Oh my God. And then put the berries in the freezer. Oh my God. And then made like owlberry jam.

Yeah. Albury jam. That's fucking horrific. Also it's a Ziploc bag. I understand the use of single-use plastics, but sometimes when there's a dead owl in it. The Ziploc bag also looked like it was 70 years old. Yeah, what else has been in that bag?

Yeah, oh, hundreds and hundreds of things have been in that bag. And now the berries are in the bag. Well, at least she's swapping things that don't spark a joy, the owl, with berries. Yes. Absolutely stabbing. Anyway, that's granny coats. Yeah. Grandma Broomhead, my mum's mum, is a notorious,

like it's gone. If you put it down for more than a second, like, that's gone. Oh, she's closed it away? In the bin. Wow. That's gone. Stuff everywhere that she absolutely loves. A lot of ducks, of course.

Well, every old woman of a certain age has to have an animal that they have everywhere. You must. Loves birds. Birds absolutely everywhere. And a cup and a little teapot and a lovely cup that she always has and that she says like, oh, like this is what a pleasure, you know, such a treat to have a cup of tea in this nice cup. And so I think we've just always. got to sort of go back a few steps

and be someone who's like... Yes, you're not getting rid of everything. You are just getting rid of stuff that doesn't make you smile. So when you... So you want to be someone who's like, oh, oh, that thing. Oh, yeah. Rather than I'm not sure about that. Yeah. So it's not really about just like, okay, you've got to go in here and get rid of 40% of your stuff or like all these mad rules. It's just about go in and find that... Because you have got them already. Like they are already in your house.

And you do, even if you're like, I don't know what kind of taste I got. You do. You just need to sort of go through and check. I think there's a lot of like shame people feel about being, like looking on Pinterest or Instagram and looking at other people's houses and then copying that style. Because that's, what do you think taste? Like that is what it is. Like, yeah, you've, you've picked that person to copy over that person. Exactly. And that's where the taste lies.

Anyone who has a truly original house, if you looked at it, you... Wow, it's insane. Yeah. So, like, live upside down or something. There are fashions just like there are. with like clothes so you're fine or anything like when was the last time you saw a film when someone was like what was it like and you're like

nothing I've ever seen you know you're like oh it was a bit this meets this like every every story every thing nothing is totally original original. Apart from original sin is that good is that so I'm rereading the

Philip Pullman his dark materials which that's a yeah yeah there's nothing truly original everyone's inspired by someone else to do something. So if you're like, well, I only painted my bathroom duck egg blue because

that personal Instagram did. You're like, yeah, and she only did it because she saw someone else to it. Yeah, exactly. That's fine. Like no one invented and your bathroom looks lovely. It does look nice. And it makes you feel a certain way. And that's what all your things should make you feel. Yeah. Absolutely. And that's exactly where you want to get in to be like, oh, I love, look

at this space. I love it to come in here every day. And even, and if you're now thinking like, well, I live in my shitty department, we've got mold and I'm like, there are a way, it's harder. but like yeah there are still wise you can't like sometimes the landlord won't let you like repaint stuff and sometimes also you're not

the sort of person that's going to repaint stuff we've got um oh what they're called they're not I mean going to find them that if you can't make holes in the wall and you can't use blue tack we can't and we've got those white things with the Velcro yeah that you pull the stretchy things what are they called?

Command hooks command hooks yes so it feels like they're not gonna that can't possibly work they basically stick onto your painted surface and they've Velcro on and you're like well when I pull that off that's obviously going to come off

you've got there are different ones for posters or framed things so you have to make sure you get the right one and we've hung everything with it and it does work it's amazing it's amazing it really is so if you've got around to property you can hang like framed pictures up yes like do that because it just looks is there any nails in here? No nails

in the whole of the flat. It's absolutely sweet it Stevie. Thank you. Absolutely beautiful so these are the very last things one is get yourself do have a little YouTube a little quick goog of Maricondo's folding technique Okay It will change your life Okay

You fold up right Think about going dark to light In your wardrobe from left to right Okay I think about it and then I'll reject it Certainly but have a thing Oh yeah Consider it also I'm not the anyone listening to you

So people listen in Others you'll all be rejecting it as well But do have a consider Have a little thing Have a little thing You want the darkest on your left And then it ooh up to the light But again those are the sort of deep

at higher level Scientology stuff that they aren't for they aren't for the best It says the big lizard that lives in the volcano Yeah yeah yeah yeah The dark feature stuff

That's like you know It's steep, it's deep It's not for everyone But you will get there Because you're in now And then lines Like when you're clearing up When you're going through this process

Get yourself a jar That you put money in that you find Oh that's fine Because you will come across them And then buy yourself a lovely treat Oh nice Get something nice A lovely jumper

No Be mindful of like Every time you find buttons Or you will come across like needles, pins. I don't know what you're doing in your bedroom. Like, as in you will come across like sewing stuff or like whatever, rather than just putting them on the side,

be like, and now all the buttons will live here. And now the sewing kit will live here. And you start to put all the things in one place. So when you want to be a person who's like, that's the draw. Where are the scissors in the house? I've got them somewhere. I don't know where. And if you're thinking like, I haven't got the time,

imagine how much time you think you waste looking for stuff. Constantly. When you know it's summer but you don't know where. So just like reset your mind and be like, it will be quicker to do it now and have a home for these things. And also then you'd open the door and be like, oh, you know what? I don't need to buy any more scissors.

Clearly, I've got a fetish. A season fetish. The last thing is just if you are somebody who ever, you either are this person or you're not, when you're a time you come across like postcards or things that you've ripped out of magazines or like little things that you're like, I don't remember what I thought that was,

but obviously like a nice pattern or something. Then when you come across those, consider sticking them up like put them places like you can put them on the the outside edge of a drawer so you know when you pull out a drawer and it's got a you know it's nude you can put you know put some nice

wallpaper that you've seen nice you know put stuff so if you're like I don't know what this is but like I don't know I look nice I don't want to get rid of it put them up somewhere so that you see them every day so they're like oh that's a nice thing and you look at it yes that's that is a good idea there are places to there are just so many places and once you get into the idea of that there are so many places in your home to add, you know, extra,

oh, what a nice little thing there that's made an addition to my, that has not cost me anything because I already had it. I'm just putting up. Yeah, and you will only previously have seen it when you're doing a clear-out. Yes. Rather than you just see it every day and open your drawers. Exactly. You're nude-balled drawers.

Yeah, so if you have a collection of, you know, there's a woman in Marie Kondo's book who collected frogs, it does feel like everyone in her book is insane. Right. Absolutely insane. And I do caveat that by saying, like, I'm in deep here, but I do know my leader is, insane.

She says one of her clients had this box of frogs, like ornamental frogs under the bed that she took out once a year and looked at and had a nice time and put them back and Mary was like put them on display. One was like her mind was blown. You're like, yeah. Put a frog to the shelf.

Why not? Like if you keep a thing rather than having one hour a year of joy from something when you get it out, like put it out. And once they're out there if you're like, I actually don't like looking at that every day. Like fantastic, take it. Take it out. down you've learned something about yourself you've closed some doors and you will join this process be like oh my god there are 18 fishing books under the bed like clearly i should either forget my dreams of

fishing or go fishing or go fishing for god's sake like and you're also be like oh so it's very much even though it's like it seems like a tedious like cleaning up it's like what kind of person am i it's not the thing it's it's how it makes us feel and it what it reveals what we think think about ourselves how we live get your joy out there mate get your joy out guys Get your joy out. That was so, that was very inspirational. I really hope it's helped. Thank you to you and Marie.

Thank you. And if anyone's done it or is on the journey. Oh my God, show is your organisational skills. If you manage to do the folding, please. Show us your folding. Show us what you've put on your bald drawers. Show us your joy? Show us your drawers, eh?

Yeah, show us something that, you know, that you've put up or managed to frame or like, or any of those things. If you've got a dead owl, get that out. Get it out or put it whatever you fancy. Oh, yeah. Some will paint it. Yeah, tweet us at Nobody DePanac Pod, or me at Stiviam. The S is a 5.

Me at Tessicoats. Murray Condo is probably on there as well somewhere. Googleer. And yeah, like, subscribe. If you like the episode, if you like other episodes, spread the word. Do some tweets, do some Instagram stories. I do look at all of them and enjoy all of them.

Read all the comments. And thank you so much. We'll see you next week. And have a lovely, sweet. Have a lovely, bye, bye, love.