Nobody Panic - How to Understand the General Election

Episode Date: December 10, 2019

Stevie and Tessa are joined by political journalist Marie Le Conte who (jargon free) explains what an election is, what the Labour and Tory manifestos actually say and what in the good lord’s name tactical voting really means. We have attempted to be non-biased but apologies if some, shall we say, VIBES leak out.Follow Marie Le Conte on Twitter @youngvulgarian.Listen to Marie's podcast 'Polling Politics' here.Recorded by Naomi Parnell and edited by Ben Williams for Plosive Productions.Photos by Marco Vittur, jingle by David Dobson.Follow Nobody Panic on Twitter @NobodyPanicPodSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/nobodypanic. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, I'm Carriad. I'm Sarah. And we are the Weirdo's Book Club podcast. We are doing a very special live show as part of the London Podcast Festival. The date is Thursday, 11th of September. The time is 7pm and our special guest is the brilliant Alan Davies. Tickets from kingsplace.com. Single ladies, it's coming to London.

True on Saturday, the 13th of September. At the London Podcast Festival. The rumours are true, Saturday the 13th of September. At King's Place. Oh, that sounds like a date to me, Harriet. Hello and welcome to Nobody Panic. It's a general election special. That's not what I was expecting.

Oh, it's voodoo-l-l-l-l-l-ha-ha. That's how you vote. Yes. You shout here, here. Just whatever, at any point on the 12th of December. Yeah. That's what you do. Shaddle it once that vote counts.

That's it. Done. You don't know who for, but they just guess, presumably. That's why we're doing a general election special because we don't understand. Almost anything. Pretty much anything, especially not politics. But I'm also like, I've been watching all the debates. I'm quite mouthy and engaged for something that doesn't understand how a general election works.

Well, I was thinking that the other, that when the EU referendum happened, before that we wrote a sketch that was about how much we didn't understand. We did. We did. We did. But I remember we really did not know what it meant to be in. Like, people were, it was over a hyacoclon days. Passy and I think. Why not?

But got it. When people literally didn't know anything about politics. Beautiful. And now here we all are so politically engaged. We know too much without knowing anything. Correct. Which is why we've got an excellent guest. And we've got Marie LeCont, who is a French Moroccan journalist.

Correct. Yes, I am. You have a BuzzFeed and Thieving Standard when you were full-time. Yes, that is correct. And now you're freelance. I am. And writing a book. I'm so sad.

The book is written a book. And the book is out. She's written a book. It's called, haven't you heard? Please explain your book. So I don't sound like I'm just speaking for you, you know. I don't want to. Hello, thanks having me.

So that's alive. My book is called, haven't you heard, I've literally forgotten the full title now. This is great. Gossip, power, and how politics really works. That's the one. That is the book that I have written and that is out in shops. But yeah, no, no, it's kind of like it is about the role of gossip in politics

and kind of, you know, like, yeah, I guess, you know, how much influence, like, whispers and rumours, etc. can have on the way the country has run. Because I kind of meant it. I did really want to write a book about politics for people who are, are obsessed with politics. I don't really see the point in that. So it's very much kind of a book

aimed at people who, like you guys. You know, I feel like, you know, feel like they kind of want to understand politics a bit but also maybe don't have a super like long attentions fan. Understood. And yeah, and get bored very quickly. No, no, because that's me. That obviously wrote the face to me like a few years ago

because I, you know, I do obviously really care about politics and find it super interesting. And I guess that the case the book kind of tries to make as well is that politics is really fun. And once you're in it, and obviously I think that. quite a lot you need to understand first and you know how stuff works and who is who etc but then it is normally and it is normally quite fun that being said you know the slight caveat is that

I now kind of want to die as a full-time political journalist because everything is so bad and so when I was doing promo for the books when I was writing it I was like no this is still fine you know politics my passion the job that I do every day but yeah by the time book promo came around earlier this year people were like so you know and I was just like I just hate them all I hate everything why did I write the stupid thing but yeah No, I'm sure politics will become good again. After this general election. No, nothing.

There is a real feeling that like both here and America that we've come, we're so close to the very bottom that surely we must begin the ascent. I generally think it can and we'll get worse. Okay, that's great. That's good. We're not in the bottom yet. We're halfway down. Oh my God.

Absolutely. We can't go this much again. I truly, oh, please. We can and we will. So this is basically an episode for anybody who, wants to ask questions like, how does an election work? What's an MP? But is embarrassed too, because their friends will be like, what's wrong with you? Get out. But I'm taking the mantle. I'm taking the, you're so brave. Thank you so much. I'm taking it one for the team here.

And sometimes you'll think, Tessa, that's so dumb. And you'll just have to think in your head, oh, she does know, but she's doing it. And you'll never know which one is correct. And yeah. Whereas just imagine I know all of it. Absolutely do not. Absolutely don't. So stressed every time I read. I think one of the things about politics was why when, because I haven't read your book, full disclosure, but I will now. When I was like looking up what it was about and the blurb and stuff, it was the first politics book that I've had a look at.

I've been like, oh, I understand all of the words. I know what this is about. This sounds really interesting. It's like taking an element of politics, it actually is quite relatable, which is gossip and all of that sort of stuff, which I think we don't realize is such an important part of it. And I think that's why we wanted to bring you in, because I think it, what's the word?

I think they almost sometimes can rely on the fact that people don't understand it in order to continue running the country or whatever. Yeah, absolutely. You're like, I don't really get it. So I'll just vote for the person I voted last time, why not? Because I don't understand all of those words. And you don't know what's spinning, you know, what isn't. And when the manifestos come out, it's like, I don't, I actually genuinely don't know

what is real and what I should be paying attention to and what I shouldn't. Yeah, there's so much smoke and mirrors. And like, we talked before about how the David Cameron, you know, dick and a pig issue. Oh, for God about that. What are you talking about? I think I think about it four or five times a day. And like how there is basically absolutely no evidence that that happened. But everyone's like, well, I like the story.

So, wow. Yeah. I mean, everyone's just like, he put his dick in a pig. Yeah. And that will be the main thing about him, you know. For the rest of his life. Yeah, because that's how gossip works. We love a good story.

And as soon as you can sort of smear somebody and get a rumor, get the rumor out there, it's out. It's out, baby. It's not going back in. So, let's start. I'm going to start with my biggest and most stupid one, which is, what is a politic? What is a political? What is a general election? And why can we just call them constantly?

Oh, cool. I mean, the first one is a general election. But it is effectively, so once every, technically once every five years. Okay. So the country goes to the polls and you get the chance to vote for your member of parliament and your constituency. So a number of different candidates for a number of different parties will. stand in each of Britain's 650 constituencies. Okay. And then people vote. And then obviously so whichever, again, normally, whichever party gets a majority of the seats, then the leader of

that party gets to become the prime minister. Right. So the majority of the 650 available seats. Yes. And is a seat an actual chance? It's a man sitting on a seat. Is it a seat? Tis not, tis not EMP sit on the green benches in the House of Commons. It's a part of a seat. So there are 650 available but places. There are places. Because it's Britain and everything is weird and nothing makes sense. You can't, I think, actually fit.

No, no, you definitely can't fit all the MPs on the green benches. Right. There's any space for like 400. And it's that, well, well done, guys. Is that because your one job? Is that because in the past there were less constituencies and so 400 was the correct number? Or someone just fucked it right from the beginning? I think the assumption, if I remember correctly, the assumption was basically

that you really, really, really, really rarely have all the MPs in the chamber at the same time. Understood. Okay. Understood. And yeah, basically. And also, because normally you'll see it at like Prime Minister's questions, every Wednesday when the House is sitting, you'll have more MPs than usual there. But they can just stand. Right. Yeah, like that big Brexit debate and everyone was stood up and everyone was shouting and shouting. It looked too full, isn't it? Why does it look too full? And you see now? And now I know. There's 250 extra people. It's 650 butts rather than seats. Yeah. That's a fascinating.

And sometimes those butts are got to stand. Yeah, sometimes they're bigger. So of those 650, do you only have to get 326 to sway into the... How much do you have to get to be the... Good fucking good math. So I was like... Two, four. Half of six, half of 50.

That's part of politics, isn't it, numbers? But no, but that's the one. And actually the quite interesting thing is that the Prime Minister in Britain technically has no formal rule to their first among equals, which means that their only rule is that they can... command a majority in the house. Okay. So, because when you look, so, for example, at the cabinet, so, you know, you'll say you'll

have the home secretary, the foreign secretary, whatever. All of those people are technically more senior than the prime minister because they've got jobs. Okay. And the prime minister technically doesn't have a job. It's just that if you can prove, you can, yeah, command a majority in the house, which is normally understood to be your party, gain the most seats and you're the leader. But obviously sometimes, like in 2010-2015, parties can make a coalition and then, you know,

the leader of that one party still lead that commands a majority. because they're now a gang to... As long as you have the numbers, then you're there, which is a slightly, I don't know. It always struck me as a weirdly odd way to do it. I don't know, it's all good of being like, yeah, well, guess you have the numbers, fine, you know, okay.

Is a hung parliament, so what is, exactly, is it a hung parliament where nobody really has had the majority but the two biggest parties joined together? Or is it that one has a majority and they're like, well, we should, like, what will it take for a hung parliament to have? A Hong Parliament just means that no single party has an overall majority in the House. So, yeah, the magical 326. But then obviously that can be a bit complicated because some parties like Sinn Féin get elected,

but don't take their seats and stuff. But anyway, and also there's the Speaker of the House of Commons who becomes sort of like magical MP session on MP when they become the Speaker. Love this country. It all makes sense. Big fan. But yeah, no, at Hong Parliament is just when no party gains an overall majority. Right.

And that's basically. That's a possibility. It's not likely. but that is a possibility. It is making... Yeah, technically it is possible whenever. We seem to just really love them at the moment, specifically. Yeah.

So last thing on this is this, do Jeremy Corbyn and Boris Johnson, are they still fighting for their seat in their constituency? They are. They absolutely are. And there's even... It's probably not going to happen, but Boris Johnson in Uggsbridge, his constituency doesn't have the biggest majority, so there's been actually a really big push from Labour to try and not see him. So yes, that could happen.

So the idea would be that actually, if that were to happen, if Boris was to lose his seat, well, Prime Minister. There'd be a lot of memes. So A, that, I think the first day would be like a ton of memes. Yeah. And then after that, so another to reopen with a massive majority would have to stand down to give his seat to Boris. And there'd be a by-election. So a special election, just one constituency where Boris would win and then come back like three weeks later and be like, hey, I never left. Wait, so when you say he has to come back three weeks later, he has to go to ground for three weeks.

weeks and then the country has no prime minister. So I think, yeah, they're like, oh, Dominic Crabble, like, another cabinet minister would just have to be, like, take over for a bit. Yeah. While Boris goes in campaigns in someone else's constituency. Yeah. To become their king and then return to power. Yeah.

This is insane. But again, that's why I have so much sympathy for people who, like, politics is very confusing. It's like, yes, it is. It is. Yeah. It's quite interesting. But there's so much, like, power play and chess moving that you don't realize.

So this, just to be, for, for, for politics, it's very interesting. hypothetical, this very popular heavy majority conservative person who wins their seat very strongly, he or she then has to fall on their sword and give up their place to the prime minister? Yeah, but then the idea can be. And I know that that's his conjecture. But my guess would be that whoever does that will then be put in the Lords and then may well be given a job as a minister from the House of Lords as like a prize for that. Oh my God. Wow. Wow. Okay. Okay. It's a really good bit of advice for anyone standing in any of constituencies that Boris might like. Yeah.

Watch your back. Yeah. Maybe a lord. This is nuts. So the 650 arses. In terms of tactical voting, because this is something that I think lots of people, I've just seen loads of tactical voting. And I nod and go, of course. And then when I try to explain it to somebody, I forget and I don't understand.

So could you please explain for me and to the people? what tactical voting is and how we as people can work out whether we should do it or not. Yeah, sure. I can even give you a short history of it because I wrote a feature on it recently. Amazing. It's a fresh in my memory. So tactical voting became a big thing in the UK actually in 97. So this group called Grot, get rid of them, who were basically just like,

the Troyes have now been in power for like 150 years. This has to end. Okay. And so looked at all the different seats in the previous election. basically which races were the closest so you know that were Tories won but maybe Labor came super close second or the Lib Dems or the SNP

and then from that they created a list of all the constituencies where you know basically the Tories won by the smallest majorities let's say there's a constituency where the Tories won by a margin of like 70 votes and you know in Labor just had like 70 votes fewer than the Tories but then I don't know

like several thousand people voted for the Lib Dems as well so then what they would say was like well listen if your priority is just getting the Tories out and you don't really care, you know, who else wins, basically. Then you should vote Labour because the Labour and Lib Dem vote combined is actually more than the Tory vote in that seat. Right. And so if all you guys basically

go for the bigger party in that seat, then you'll win. So it's go for the bigger party, the second one down from the Tories. I didn't realise it was just to get Tories out. Tactic. That's interesting. So that's because they are consistently the... They consistently have the majority, I suppose. It could be used the other way around.

So it could be... It was used against Labour as well. Okay. In 2005, I can't remember who was the campaign. With those media campaign being like, get, you know, get there out, which obviously, you know, did not work, but, you know, they tried. But so it can be any party, but it's just, yeah, essentially it's just looking at different seats, looking at, you know, but especially the ones of the races were very close.

Right. And then, yeah, seeing who was second best and then trying to vote for them. So you look at your own constituencies. So, for example, my one is a safe labour, apparently. Matthew Penny Cook, you do great work. He's got a very long face. He has got a long face. And it helped with some situation with the wetlands in the area.

Really like him. He's, apparently, he's been in there since 2015, and apparently it's been Labour for a long time. So I suppose I'm fine. But I suppose if you look, does everyone have to look at what the history of their constituency is? And what the last, or just the last election? Is it called a swing seat? Is that right?

Is that American? That's American. Oh, no. A marginal seat. A marginal seat. So that's a seat where, I mean, everyone disagrees on how to. properly define it because again this is Britain and why write things down and agree on things but I think it's around 5% so at 5 points so if the winning party in that seat won by under

5 points then it's a marginal seat the idea being that basically there must be a website that's got a list of all the marginal suit I think so very much yeah yeah oh great but as I say so yeah moving on from 97 what's made it because that was you know super straightforward and it's actually quite fun so they worked with different left of centre newspapers like the independent and stuff and they were like just published literally lists of marginals and were like that one SNP, that one, Labour, etc. But obviously, so I think now it is a lot harder because, partly because anyone can create a website

to tell you who to vote for, you know, according to whatever. But B, I think that has been the main issue this time round. We have far too much data. So in a way, it was nearly easier to be like, okay, we've got one set of numbers to look at and is one for the last election and that's that. But now I say, okay, well, do we look at that? Do we look at the results in the European election?

Do we take into account, you know, remain leave in that area? do we pay attention to the current polls? You know, like, there's so much basically, and depending on, you know, what you decide to pick, then it might tell you. Well, actually, you know, in that seat, Lib Dems definitely have a better chance. No, Labor, no, Lib Dems, no, S&P, whatever.

Right. So I think it's become, in a word, the more data we have, the more confusing is. Right. So should the average voter maybe look at the general, look at the last election? Like, is that, just for people at home being like, now I don't know what to do?

Like, is that the easiest way? I think it is, but also is just, I think, good to remember that it's really not an exact science. Of course, right. Okay. And so, you know, if you're going to be tactical voting, you may, you know, it may be a good shout or you may fuck it up. Yeah. I guess it's like if you're in a seat that you really care about labor, you really care about the Lib Dems, but you know that like the Lib Dems will get 2% and therefore your vote while sort of like, well, thank you for your support. But it's actually, let's get shit done. Let's get some shit done.

If it's like, no, it's so important to me that I vote for the party I care about, then do that. But if really you just care about not having the MP that you currently have, then go for number two down. Even if you don't. Prefer the fourth one. Even if you prefer number four, you know that number four is not going to get anything done. Yeah. Which is sort of how it feels when like, you know, tiny, small, very good parties emerge that you sort of be like, wonderful, thank you. But you're actually sort of green party and the women's party and, you know, and lots of things like that.

You're like, wonderful green. but like it would be more helpful if you could throw your weight to something. You're never going to take them down from position number four. Yeah. But if you put your weight behind number two, maybe we've got a chance. Yeah. And you mentioned the polls there. Are there like particular polls?

It's like, well, that's a good poll to look at because there's so many polls every day. And there's also now like on Twitter, I've been drawn in by some like joke polls. I'd be like, no way. It's like, oh, no, that is a joke. And so, yeah, if someone's listening to. thing being like I literally don't know where to find anything. What's a good part? Is the UGov good? Oh man. I don't, I think I think

Pauls are quite tricky. Partly, so I actually, and I feel like I need to plug it now, but I actually do a podcast called polling politics. Oh my God, great. Listen to Marie's podcast. Yeah, Paulster, J. Twyman, who's very good and he's part of Delta Pole, formerly of Yegov. And it's obviously something we've talked about quite a lot, especially in the context of the election. And I think what, especially Paulster's want people to know is that polls are not predictions, they're snapshots. So it's not when people look at a poll, let's say published yesterday. I don't know, let's make a fake one,

you know, saying that Labor actually would get a majority. Then, you know, what people get from that is that, oh my God, Labor is about to get majority. Maybe not. Like, you know, and it's, and there's the thing of, no, what it means that that that's where the country was at, you know, on the day, that on that day they asked people, that's how they felt and that's that. And it may well change because I think every election there's going to be chatter of like, oh, well, the pulls were wrong because clearly, you know, they didn't predict what happened. It's like, and it's actually quite funny talking to pollsters because they're really getting quite desperate. They're like, but we're not trying to predict. We never said. No, right.

But I've never been asked. Like, who, who do they poll? So he never once been asked. And he is a pollster? He is. So his job every day is to poll? It is. Wow. Wow. So what does involve? What does it involve? Who does he poll? I do just put it. I genuinely, if it was me, I would just poll myself and then I would just hand in the results and be like, done. I know. Also, actually, I think the interesting about polling is, I don't always hear the fact that, you know, his company will talk to a lot of people on different issues,

so normally either for, like, newspapers or private clients or whatever, or for, you know, just their own stuff. But then, so I think that the difference between, you know, just us, I don't know, asking people in the street, you know, for their opinion on something and being like, it's a poll now. And what they actually do is the waiting of the pool. So it's comparing, so all the people, let's say you've asked, like, you know, 300 people a question.

And you'll have asked them as well, you know, their gender, their age, where they live, etc. And you have all that data as well for the general British population. And so you have to basically make certain, I guess make certain opinions more important. But let's say you actually, you know, unknowingly got to any interviews,

so like 60% men and 40% women, because as we know, men just have opinions on everything. But, you know, obviously, it is 50-50 in the world. So you will give more weighting to the woman you pulled. So it basically, you know, correlates because actually the end of it. electorate is not 60% men, 40% women or whatever. So actually a lot of it is in the very fine-tuning of the weighting of like,

yeah, trying to make the people, yeah, you polled look more like the electorate. I see, right. And so is there not a particular poll that we should all be looking at? It's just, we just have to take all of it with a bit of a like, how interesting and now we move on sort of situation. I think so. And I think basically, now, and especially again, now there's so many pools, they're quite useful to look at the general movement things are going.

Yeah. So normally, because obviously in Everypool will get normally slightly different results as well. But if you get a thing of, let's say, and I think, you know, in the last week, every pool had Labor going up a bit. Some of them by like one point. Some of them are quite a lot of points. So I think what you can get from that is, oh, Labor seems to be on the up somewhat. And then so I think they're quite good for, yeah, just tracking the national mood of going,

like, oh, who's broadly speaking going up, who's broadly speaking going down. Understood. And that's anything, anything closer than that, and then you might set yourself up for disappointment or, you know, surprised or... So it's, take it with a pinch of salt, take it with... It's this on this day, and it's a quiet reflection of something, but not a... So if your faves aren't doing great, they might do great in the election. You don't know.

It's just that on that Tuesday they weren't doing great, I suppose. Right. We thought it would be quite nice to just look at each of the manifesters. We're going to focus on Labour and Conservatives, because so sorry, Joe Swinson, but it's not likely that the Lib Dems are going to get some sort of windfall landslide. But best of luck, and if you're a Lib Dem listening, best of luck to you. So, thought we'd look at the manifestos of Labour and Conservatives. And obviously, you know, you may not have read them.

Oh, no. They're very boring, I have not. Very boring. Right. But on purpose, like, they know exactly what they're doing. Yeah. You release a massive document that's full of waffle. And then you know that no one's going to.

dredge through it. And they want to wait for your little, what's the wordy, little tagline, like get Brexit done and for the many, not the few. Yeah. So then everyone just goes, well, I suppose I'll take it. Yeah, exactly. And then you trust that some journalist will wade through it, pick out some sound bite that's in there. And, yeah, I hope, anyway, please, sorry.

No, so start with the conservative manifesto. I just wanted to ask you if there was anything that you think is notable or, like, basically, there are top lines of things that are interesting about the conservative manifesto. We are going to be non-biased. and I hope nothing creeps out in my voice for either. Well actually the TRI Manifesto is a bit of a weird one in that there's not much in it.

Interesting, okay. How so? Well, no, I think, you know, and I think that's what they wanted is just, you know, they kind of, you know, they wanted this to be the Brexit election. So they're like, okay, is he going big on Brexit, so, you know, saying,

we will leave, you know, on the deadline of the 31st of January 2020, but then also the transition period will last no longer than until December 2020. And then we're out and blah blah, blah. And, you know, on the deal that Boris, I guess, sort of negotiated. So that's the main thing. Then they want to get tough on crime. Great.

That's their big thing. Basically, yeah, like, you know, keep people in prison for longer and stuff and so forth. So big on that. So health-wise, that's a slightly weird thing. So they've tried to go really big on health. So with this NHS thing, may ask, There's obviously been a lot, I found it very confusing because Boris Johnson said in the debate repeatedly, we are not selling the NHS off. Then Labor said, oh, well, they said that they're going to actually privatise it, but just slowly, something that no one will notice.

And then everyone was like, yeah, well, those documents that Labor have revealed are actually pointless and they don't actually say anything. And then everyone was like, yes, they do. And what do you think? Oh, shit. It's okay if you don't think anything. I'm not sure. So I think, okay, a bunch of different thoughts. I think on the documents themselves, as I think quite a lot of like generally impartial, like, wonks tweeted about at the time, they were actually reading through that, that looks like quite normal talks of like at the beginning of any talk on anything,

you do have to discuss, you know, what each party actually wants and, you know, what will be the, you know, what will be the topic of discussion. Rather than, you know, kind of draw the big lines and being like, okay, what we'll be talking about, you know, half I can we push on this, half I can we push on that, et cetera. So, I feel like the people I've seen talking about, say, who know what they were talking about, didn't seem especially worried. About the NHS, right. Yeah, and then on the privatisation thing, I'm not sure, because I do think that

having had that chat with a number of Tory mates in the past, their argument is always, well, we have been in power for quite a lot of years since the NHS was created. It's still here, like, you know, and their argument is like, well, you know, if we'd really wanted to just privatise it, we probably would have done it. And I do, you know, and I do think that actually

the vast majority of conservative, MPs, not all of them, but I do think a majority of them generally do you want to keep a sort of like, you know, public, public NHS, that's for our point of use. That being said, you know, so I think that's a thing. So I think they would be comfortable probably setting off bits of it and making bits of it private, but not necessarily for the end point of, you know, and then it'll be fully privatised. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. But it's just, I think there's that. And I think, you know, there's probably the argument as well that they would put sort of like less funding in to the NHS than Labour would, which is probably why Labor tends to lead on the issue more, because Labor is just like, you know, clearly there's a massive funding crisis in the NHS. But, yeah, so they... It's not as hysterical. I think maybe this would be a constant, is it?

It's not always as hysterical as everyone would like, you should believe, whereas like, Boris is literally, like, waiting desperately to sell it to Trump. And Jeremy Corbyn is like, I'll save it! Like, it's not... Whereas, obviously, the political discourse is always that, isn't it? It's always just like, oh, one's a savior and one's evil, or then it switches around.

One's incompetent and one's competent. And it's very difficult to... to keep a level head. So that was very interesting because that kind of shows that there was more to it. And obviously you don't know because you're not in the rooms,

but you've got more of an overview than I have. I think the thing is like it's sort of a small end of the wedge that like obviously it won't be like day one and it's off. That's the end. That's the end. NHS is gone and everything costs a thousand pounds.

I think it's more like it will be very slow privatisation in which they sell bits of it off. And that is a possibility. And I think once that begins, once you set a precedent of like, oh, this worked when we sold you know this small section like it will just become greater and greater but that's already kind of the case if I were to agree with that I do think that you know that already bits you know and partly

from new labour are they already sort of like you know private bits of the NHS kind of you know obviously like private contracts etc and they're kind of there but but you know I think that being said as well and that's going to be with a huge caveat because I'm not a health policy specialist but I think on all sides if you talk to the experts they're like this is all nice that we keep fucking arguing about you know either privatisation or just funding and that's it And actually a lot of the problems in the NHS are a lot more complex than that. And it's about the way it's run. It's about who really has the powers.

It's about the administration, the different hospitals, etc. So again, all that stuff you'd only really know about, I think, if you're really an NHS expert. Yes. Which I am not. So I will not get into the detail of it. But I think is that as well when you get stuck into a really simplistic debate. Yeah. You lose the idea that, you know, and again, when you talk to health professionals,

that actually that's like, you know, super far down the list of, like, things that we need to sort out. We care about as actual medical professionals. It's, yeah. Very interesting. Right, so you saying, Let's go back on that note. So I think they do have, yeah, some stuff. So, well, like, that was a slightly weird one

because they're going to bring in 50,000 nurses. Then there was that puzzling into him at Hancock. We're like, well, they're not extra nurses. And it's like, what are they now? It's like, well, that's not, how can that be extra? Yeah. So that's generally, 30,000 more nurses. An unclear.

A number of nurses, there will be a number of extra nurses that may be new, but may not be you. Yeah, right. But I think something that people find very hard with all of these promises is like they have already been in power for nine years. Why aren't they already there? So for you to be like, well, no, no, I promise, you know. And also there feels this real like, you know, well, it will be shit under Corby.

You're like, well, it's quite shit now. And you're in charge. It might be nice to have an alternative. Yeah, yeah, exactly. They're like, you can't be like, we promised to bring in 50,000 more nurses. Like, why are they not already here? That's possibly the constant maybe difficulty of someone, uh, the party who was in power in an election having to be like, well, we'll promise these things.

And I'm being like, yeah, but you've done. Yeah, really this election should be like, look at our backlog of work. Like, look what we've done and we will continue to do this good work. But I think the weird thing must be that in that period of time, they have had three prime ministers and that's probably not great because it is quite general elections get quite personal. So I think it's the weird thing where Boris can't really go, well, look at, you know, everything I did over the past few years because it wasn't him. And obviously he's not exactly a close friend of Theresa May or David Cameron's.

But yeah, but equally, you know, he can't just rubbish then because then that rubbish is the party. So it's like, so I think, you know, it is that slightly weird thing when you had several PMs while a party has been in power. Like that last one is a bit like unclear. I don't know what to say. Get Brexit done. Yeah, yeah. There's busy that. But then, so apart from that, they'll end hospital parking fees for night shift workers, disabled people and relatives are terminally ill.

That's very nice. And we'll bring in. that's like, oh my God, why was that not already in place? I did not know that was even a thing. Like, that's insanity. So to be like, we promised to win this. You're like, you absolutely, the fact that that's still, the fact that that's in place is testament that you.

I think there's a weird thing. So I don't, I've not followed it super closely because it's really dull. But I think, and I think there is some debate over like hospital parking fees. Because apparently when like it's free is just people in the area and they're parking there. And so people with, you know, ill, like, relatives. Yeah, just don't want. But again, I don't really care because it was very dull.

It was one of those debates where, like, people got super worked up as well. And I was like, I don't even know what you're talking about. There's always more to it than, like, the conservatives love getting money from those people who have friends who are sick and they're visiting them in hospital and people who are doing nightshifts. It feels like there has to be a reason that that hasn't happened already. But I guess as well, they will have to, yeah, I don't know how they'll tackle the concept of their. then people park in in those spaces. But the hospital carbox are massive, so I'm sure it's fine. Yeah, but then, so I think with that,

actually coming back to where we're talking about, they're bringing back nursing bursaries, which, in fact, I'm not entirely certain, but I'm almost certain the conservatives were the one who cut the nursing bursaries. And it's like, just get kind of a knife set up. What, fuck that one up. Yeah, let's bring it back.

Sorry. Sorry. Just sliding it across the tables. I'm like, sorry, sorry. You can have your money back now. Apart from that, where are there issues? Yeah, again, there's. really not much. It's just Brexit, face it. So there's, I mean, it's still, yeah, they

aim to reach net zero in terms of that carbon emissions by 2050, but we knew that. And everyone says that 2050 is definitely too late. Yeah. So, so that's not, like that that's not really a sexy headline kind of grabbing things. That's, yeah, we'll definitely be dead by the time yeah, but that's way too far. Yes. Yes. But, I know, yeah. But they're all quite old, aren't they? So they're all just like, well, it doesn't really affect me. So I'll, it's a weird thing like bill and melinda gates once attempted to do um malaria zero and they were like we will eradicate malaria in in a year and everyone was like gosh maybe give it like five give us a chance you know whereas like what course you can't do that whereas this is the polar opposite that's like

way way too long and pointless we'll be living underwater by that point but that's kind of it that's kind of it it's basically just yeah a lot of Brexit with a cider cider crime and a bit of a bit of nurses but a nursing bus. Okay. Turn to Labor. Because they're promising lots of things. What are the most exciting things that they're promising? They are. Well, I do feel like we have to start with Brexit. Sorry, this is very boring. No, we absolutely have to. But actually that's one

on which I will really defend Labour, because I feel like lots of people, including Labor supporting people that have been like, ugh, like the Labour plans on Brexit are so confusing and so weird, like why they're doing that. It's actually really straightforward. It's like, if Labour were to win, they'd go to Brussels, negotiate a softer deal, you know, as with Labour

policy, and then they take it to the country and be like, hey, by the way, it's been a while. Do you want this deal? Actually, do you just want to, like, call the whole thing off? And that's that, which I generally think is not, like, it's quite a good shout. Yeah. And also, I feel as well, of the pulling point of the conservatives is that, well, there's already a deal. So it's, and Boris keeps saying, it's ready to go in the oven. He gives a lot of cooking references. But there is a very distinct possibility, I'm sure, that they will have to negotiate another deal because they've had to negotiate just consistent deals constantly. So there's not that much difference between the two.

The only difference is that Labour will give us the option, whereas conservatives will probably, there'll probably be some back and forth between Europe anyway. The deal that, as it currently stands, is not likely to be the one that we go out on the 31st of January with. And we don't even know if we're going to go on the 31st January because it keeps being pushed back anyway. So it feels a bit like, yeah, I felt like that when it was all like, that's very confusing. I was like, actually it just sounds the same, but with just a little bit more choice for everybody. I don't. I don't know. I would argue. And I think, and that's, I don't know, that's partly a failure of the press, but also I'm not sure how the press could have handled that differently. But we've not talked that much, actually,

about what's been in all those deals, like what was in Theresa May's with all agreement, what Boris change, et cetera, like, you know, and what Labour would offer. Like, there's been little. And I think that the Labour deal, because it would have a closer relationship with the EU, would, A, you know, like the economy would take a lot less of a hit but also would, this is the boring technical bit, but this is only like, and I feel like we keep forgetting this, the deal we've been arguing about for like 1,000 years now is only the beginning. It's not even, like we've not even talked about the future relationship really between the UK and the EU. This is just the terms of the, the terms of the exit. That's it. And so actually, so there's the argument as well that Boris's deal in whatever Labour would

negotiate would set Britain on very different paths in terms of like what the future relationship would be. Interesting. Those deals would be. like generally sort of like different. I see. It's difficult for us to know that because we just don't, like you say, we don't know about any of the other deals, the past deals, really, because they're so complicated and then they just didn't work. And then I also can't fathom

what the Labour deal would be. Do you know, like, it's like, so we interpid, but then at the same time it's like, well, like you said, an alternative would be nice, because it's not working as it is. So there's always that as well. Yeah, I think everybody has got, by just keep shouting, get it done, with no concept of what it, or the word done,

means in that and so everybody knows they're playing to a you know it's not clear they know that we're too confused by it they know that we don't know what on earth we're talking about and we they know that we're extremely bored and we're very bored of it of the whole thing and so everyone's like yeah imagine how I feel

constantly bombarded with Brexit but yeah okay well suppose that's a difficult one for people to get their heads around us to one might think that yes let's just get out let's just get out because I'm bored and then there's the other thing of just like well let's try another option that's softer that maybe it feels like with Labor maybe we would be able to understand it

a bit more they would make it a bit easier for us to understand and then put it because if we're going to vote on it we have to understand it whereas with the conservative one we don't have to understand it for that to be put into place which I think is I find to be the kind of crucial difference between as someone who doesn't know anything. Yeah I think it's

absolutely mind-blowing that well firstly that David Cameron resigned on the day like he should have had the balls to be like I fucked it and now I'm going to be a leader and I'll stay for breakfast and I'll stay for breakfast you know like very classy rather than just like pre-ejaculating and then and then like wandering out the door and being like humming being like to talk to your class um is that yeah well sorry no I liked it but like that is you know that's the like at the moment when true leadership was needed he immediately just ran for the hills and when people needed him desperately to sort of steer

the country and exactly what you're saying is like kicked out by the Tories, Tory MPs. Oh, he 100% would, but just the, you know, he should have had the balls to stay and be taken down rather than be, you know, just scuttle off. Like, and he should have put those things in place. Exactly that. To be like, okay, here's a completely divided nation.

Some of whom think this and some of whom think this. Let's go out and let's ask the people what it is they need and be like, okay, we obviously need to sort out this and this and this. But otherwise, is everyone cool with the rest of it? Okay, let's, you know, carry on rather than this, you know, give some people some black passports and then, you know, let's get, let's get, let's, let's. let's not talk about this again, rather than let's argue relentlessly about this for the next 10,000 years.

But also, and I think one of the bigger, I think when we look back at Brexit in like decades to come, one of the bigger mistakes was Theresa May deciding to trigger Article 50 before she knew really what she wanted. Yeah, that's quite true. And it's like that's not, you know, that's the decision making 101 when, you know, you don't want like, I don't know, you know, like looking at work, I'm not going to set myself a deadline for a piece. I'm writing if I don't know what the fucking piece is. It's just one of those It's like you kind of need

And the fact that she was just like Well that's the big red button It's like that's not how politics should work Yeah in many ways That is sort of what people do recommend With trying to write something Is like set yourself a deadline You know

You hear that example No no that's what I mean It's like it is the perfect personal example But if you're running You know An entire world economy You know Everybody will be affected by this thing

Don't be like Yeah yeah I just put it in I just did it Loll. Let's get back to the Labour Manifesto. And yeah, anything that sort of particularly piqued your interest. In terms of the environment, I think they're quite interesting.

So they're not committing actually to a strict deadline for net zero. Okay. They're saying they're aiming to have net zero on carbon emissions by 2030. Okay. But basically, no, that may not be possible, but they want to get as close as possible to it. It would plan two billion trees by 2040. Yeah, that's fascinating.

I'm into it, big fan of trees. So when someone did a breakdown that was like, And I think the end was something like they, if that's true, then they will have to be planting like 36 trees per second. That was a super interesting debate. Actually, on Twitter at its best of like people coming up and they're like, hi, I'm actually an expert tree planter. And it turns out, super easy, super easy to plant trees,

which I did not know like 48 hours ago. But it's apparently just like, yeah, you can plant one million a day quite easily and it's like, what? Wow. Wow. We'll say, A, what, B, why we're not doing it? C, I'm on one million trees now. I want to help.

I want to help plant the tree. Give me some tree seeds. I don't know how the nature works. We'll do it. Well, we aren't doing it because people would rather a, you know, Trump's like, what if we put a reflector in space and the sun shone back on itself? Ideas.

Like, we would genuinely rather that than just be like, let the planet tell you what it needs, which is more trees. That's like, we don't, you know. Yeah, it's so bizarre. I'm slightly dead as the idea of like, yeah, a big sun mirror. Yeah. Like a big magnifying glass over the sun. And so yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, let's invest in that.

Probably put a trillion pounds or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you so much. But I think, interestingly, as well, they do have quite a good plan on how to get stuff done. So they would have a green industrial revolution, which would add one million jobs to the employment market and shift industries like construction and electricity, transport and gas towards renewable energy. So it's not just about reaching net zero. It's about kind of like reshaping society as well in a way that makes it sort of like more. But practical almost.

You can see how the, because that's the problem, isn't it, with the, of those, you know, especially like the northeast, those kind of industrial mines and factories and things are just, they don't fit in with this new kind of like green wave. So if there's some way that we can, or that labor can. Yes, that's exactly it. It's not just about being like, oh, there's no more mines, there's no more this, there's no more thing. It's like, it's like, it's this now. You still have a job. For anything, you're making more money, but now we make this. With some green paint. We make green paint. You know, it's not about saying, oh, everyone's going to lose their job. It's being like, you'll still, oh, you've got a job.

Yeah. It's just going to be more. World healthy. Exactly, rather than just getting rid of things. Mm-hmm. And then, and actually I'm going to have to mention because I forgot the Tory thing, this is the really boring bits about work and taxes, etc. Yeah. So the Tories would raise the national insurance threshold to 9.5K next year

and eventually raise it to 12.5K. Okay. So meaning the first, like, you know, 9 to 12K you earn, you would not have to pay national insurance on it. Okay. Okay. How would that affect things? Well, how would that affect anything?

Well, so currently you don't have to pay it on 10,000. pounds. Okay, right, interesting. And now you get an extra £2,000 basically. Okay. You know how new when you do your tax return? No, but what do the government use the national insurance contributions for? Like, with that, that's not, don't, Marie looks like she said, explode.

They put it in the big taxis pot. And then when they need money, they take it from the big taxes spot. Understood. So, hopefully you presume that Labor have got income somewhere out, or like they're going to be getting money somewhere else. So they're taxing the over 80,000. To make up for that.

I see, right. So that's, yeah. So who's is that? The Tories. Right. The Tories, yeah. But no, so Labor, so, yeah, labor would increase income tax on those earning over 80K a year. Right.

And also reversed or Osborne's inheritance tax cuts. Oh, interesting. Oh, really? Yeah. Here's a really interesting thing that I think says so much about it is that, like, Jacob Rees-Mogg writing his, like, disaster capitalism book, and, like, so many of people currently involved in Brexit literally bet heavily on it, you know, and, like, shorted the market, whatever they did in the big shop, stuff that we cannot comprehend.

and then there's like billions of pounds on the line. And also I spoke to a, I mean, I met a investment broker. Hello. Hello. At a party. Who is like, oh, people are running with their money out of investment firms because people are concerned that if Labor get in, like the investment market will collapse. And so that sort of tells you everything you need to know,

which is like the big money group. Like the inheritance tax being changed. Like this is, you know, and there's a whole documentary about them changing it from being called like inheritance tax to death tax or the other way around that like if it feels like a thing that basically it's like the Tories are so clearly like people with a lot of money are making more money here you know and so if it's like and then is yeah anyway that's fine but I always find it's there's a study I thought was super interesting on how the super wealthy quite recently we're still more scared of Corbyn than a no-deal Brexit and it's like but also

that's really weird because just like in very factual terms you know what whatever happens with Corbyn, even if, you know, like, McDonald takes over and whatever and goes, like, full hard left. Like, it's still, I think the super wealthy would still lose more cash or, you know, kind of their companies would tank more in a no-deal Brexit than under a Corbyn government. Virginia, as a factual thing. So it's interesting how ideology clearly supersedes, I think, anything factual on that. But so just finished the manifesto, Labor, we're not talked about Labor in the NHS. So they would increase the amount it spends on health by 4.3% every year. offer $1.6 billion a year for mental health services,

which I think is very good, because everyone's brain is broken now. And also, the one I'm generally quite excited about, free dental checkouts for everyone. Good Lord. I know, I know. I don't have been texting me for the last two years saying, you're overdue for your checkup, and I'm like, I don't want to spend that amount of money.

I feel fine. I've been meaning to go for quite a long time as well, which is I think there's policy specifically, I'm like, you have caught my attention. Yeah, it has been months. I was hanging out with a friend in the pub yesterday, who was like, just got my teeth clean. I'm like, why would you shame me like that?

Like, yeah. And other than that, Labour would raise the real living wage to £10 an hour for all workers above 15, because obviously currently 16 to 18 year olds and less than they're older counterparts. And yeah, I think there's some childcare stuff as well from the parties.

Well, I think the Tories are creating a £1 billion fund dedicating to getting high quality and affordable childcare, but it's not entirely clear yet how are they going to spend that billion. Okay. But, you know, that's nice. Yeah. And Labor would include 30 hours a week of free child care to all preschool kids.

And mothers or partners sharing parental leave would get a full year of maternity leave. Oh, wow. Okay. That's nice. That is nice. And I wrote that bin. It's like, oh, that's just quite nice. And what would you say? Because obviously, the Labour manifest is a lot more detailed and there's less just about Brexit.

But lots of people saying that they are overpromising and they can't possibly afford. But then I've read something that said like at a... An economist, an economist, looked at it and was like, no, there's not any, like, they would be able to afford that. It seems their budget, it seems pretty legit. It's very difficult to know what to believe. Well, my favourite, by which I mean, most depressing bit, was the IFS, the Institute for Fiscal Studies, which is normally, so it's the thing tank that is always in charge of, you know, whenever there's, whenever there's, whenever a government does a budget, for example, the IFS will be the one for the day after being like, you know, it's good or bad, and this can happen. happens. It's kind of their thing.

Follow the IFS. And then after the manifesto, they were like, yeah, no, neither manifesto really works financially. That's, yay. So interesting. Fucking great. Cheers for that. That's good to know. We need to know this stuff.

Okay. But then, but also, I don't know. I don't know. I always find the fights about, oh, how we're going to spend that, you know, with that work and stuff on manifestos is quite boring because it's like, well, actually, you know, there will always be one million different ways to interpret manifestos and be like, oh, oh, but actually, you know, and it's all. but actually, you know, and it's always the thing of like,

if the Tories are looking at the Labour Manifesto, they'll try and add up all the like top figures, you know, to be like, look at how much they'd be spending and vice versa and stuff. And it's like, actually, you know, most of the time you can get what you want to get from Manifesto if you try hard enough. So, yes. And also the manifesto shows in another way, it just shows the kind of general ideology of a party

what they would like to do if they had that money sometimes, rather than, oh, technically, can you do all of this in the first year? Of course they can't. But often it's worth a read or worth looking at all of the parties' manifestos, just to see if it's... Also, would you like a very nerdy fact? Yes, please. Yes, please. Cool.

Which I really enjoy. So part of the reason why parties put a shit ton of occasionally, like, seemingly random stuff in the manifestos, is that there's a long-held convention in British politics that... Because you know, the way it happens normally stuff in a manifesto, whatever, but let's say a party in government, they want a new law, you know, a new bill on something. And so it goes through the commons, then through the laws. Commons laws, so it kind of does that for a while, different amendments, etc. However, the House of Lords is not allowed to vote down a bill if it was in the manifesto

of the party who won. So basically, if you stick a thing in the manifesto, it means that your only job and your only threat is in the Commons, not in the Lords. Back from, I think, the first Labour government who got elected, but then at the time the House of Lords was full of Tories and they were like, well, listen, we've got to do something about this because like the Lords will just vote down everything would you otherwise and so the compromise they reach was like okay well fine if what you're putting through your stuff you did get elected on like so that was part of your manifest on your platform then we will not vote

it down and so that's why pop up in just in yes yes why are they popping more stuff in pop it's but that's why it's what interesting because it feels like you know the Tories will just do very little and then obviously you know you can still do stuff that's not amazing Isn't it really cool? Yeah, and exactly what I'm saying. It feels like if the Tories have not got a lot of stuff in their manifesto, it's like they're not even bobbing to hedge their bets on it's been taken down. But then I think it's a fine line to tread on because that's kind of what Theresa May tried to do in 2017.

Look, the manifesto was thick. Like there was a ton of stuff there. Right. But then obviously the more stuff you put, the more potential there is for controversy to be about, you know, even a minor thing. About dementia tax thing and everything. Yeah, no, exactly. So I think you've got to have that balance between we want to try and, like, you know, try and put in everything we can think of.

So if we really want to do it, then we can get it through the laws. But equally, the more you put, the more chance you have of getting a policy, they'll get bad headlines. Right, so it's quite hard to balance out. That should be the American system. Like, you should have one idea. And if you get voted in, then no one can fight you. You just do it.

Yeah? I have a question from listener, Alice, who got this going on touch. Hello, Alice. Hello, Alice. She says, I would love if you could discuss whether the parties have kept their promises in recent history because there's lots of promises in the campaign for X amount of the NHS or X amount to tackle homelessness but these promises have been made before and I'd love to know the history of sticking to them so I can they'd much rather vote for a promise that will

be stuck to rather than arbitrary pipe dream what now obviously it's very difficult to go like well the answer is not going to be the labour of always the Tories of never it's much more difficult but if so that's fine if you can't but it'd be good to know your thoughts about that as a whole. Well, there's been, actually, there was a really fascinating study on exactly that topic a few years ago, which I don't have on me because I don't carry studies I've read around. Why not? Oh, my God. However, I can tell you where it's from and it's a very good book, especially if you're only like a bit interested in politics or, again, have no attention span like me. It's called sex lies in the ballot box. And it's basically, there's two people who got,

I can remember how many, let's say, like 30 academics who study politics and they're like, okay, so hey, your life's work, can you condense it into. to 2,000 words and also make it entertaining. And so it's those 30, 2,000 word essays on, like, one topic that someone is a complete expert on. It's really, really good. But anyway, so one of them, yeah, it's, I really, I've read it twice because I am tragic. But one of them.

Fascinating. Yeah. One of them was about, actually, you know, how much actually gets done, you know, between manifestos and, like, people in power. And actually, yeah, again, I can remember the exact figure, but it's something quite high, actually, not quite 70%. But I remember, like, it's quite a high figure. So actually, political parties.

do a lot of what they say they will do. So they didn't actually break promises that often. However, the massive caveat in that study was that manifestos are always very good at making most stuff quite vague. Right. So it's quite hard to, so obviously apart from like normally a few big eye-catching policies, it's more like promises to do more on this or make sure we consult on this, whatever. And it's always quite hard to be like, okay, well, you know, how, who gets to decide whether

they've done enough for it to be like a commitment that they've fulfilled or not. But actually they tend to do a lot. But then I think the other thing on that as well is that it can be a bit of a tricky one because if you're just like a normal voter, like a normal person, you're probably not very likely to read an entire party's manifesto. What you're going to read is probably the leaflets you get from your different MPs or read stuff from your MP. And there's always going to be, I think, a discrepancy between –

because I think it's basically it's entirely fair for a local, let's say local Tory MP to be like, these are the issues I care about, you know, if elected I'll care about this. and this and that, what that means, you know, especially assuming that person doesn't become a minister or anything that doesn't become, like, randomly the prime minister overnight, is that they will fight in Parliament and within the party to get stuff done on those issues, so let's say green issues or whatever.

But at the end of the day, there's still one MP in a party, like in a system that's based on political parties. So there's only so much they can do. Right. So I think that that's the thing as well on keeping in mind kind of, you know, expectation as an MP, there's only so much they can do as, like, one member of parliament. Yes. So there is also, so when Alice is, for example, looking at the manifestos, it's quite likely that 70% of that stuff will get done, but just not in the way

in this, because it was supposed like a lot of the headlines will focus on the things that maybe they didn't do. Like, so the left will focus on the things that the Tories didn't do and then the right way. But so I guess it's more like, don't think about that so much and just think, just vote for the manifesto that really you identify with the most. and that you think works for you the best. That or also, you know, it can be the case, you know, that you want, and especially I think this election has been, like, quite specific for that as well, in that quite a lot of people seem to be very unhappy with the party they usually vote for.

And now that's, you know, I think all sides or Brexit sides or left and right, etc. A lot of voters are like, well, you know, I'm usually Tory, but that's a faff or I'm usually labour, but that's a faf, etc. And then I think what happens is that you can also, because a lot of what an MP does is work in the local area as well. And so obviously because I think, like, we've talked a lot about the House of Commons and all the butts on the seats, etc. But at the end of the day, you know, an MP is very much a local person.

They take care of their constituency. So I think it's always fair, especially for maybe MPs who are all the, you know, are currently MPs, to look at their record in the local area as well. You know, have they been good? Have they been helpful to constituents in need? Have they, you know, been good at, yeah, caring for the area, both internally, but also maybe if there's a problem in that area, being able to go up to Parliament, go up to the relevant minister and be like, listen, there's that problem in my constituency, fix it.

So I think that there's a lot as well about the local stuff, like beyond the party politics of like, you know, is your own, you're good local person? Because that is at the end of the day, who you're voting for. You're voting for your MP, aren't you? You're not voting for Boris or Jeremy or Joe. You're going to, yeah. That's fascinating.

Is there anything else that you wanted to ask, Marie? Dessa. No, I feel, full. Full yet. Full of Marie. Full of Marie. Yeah, deeply tired by the whole notion of British politics. I did see a really nice quote from somebody on Instagram that was like voting is not like marriage.

You get on a bus that is going in generally the right direction. Don't wait for one that's going perfectly where you want to go. You know, just like start traveling. Sorry, I do not know what that says about me, but I genuinely thought the way that quote was going to go was like voting is not like marriage. It's more like trying to pick someone up in a club at 3am where, you know, there's only the people that are here. Exactly.

Exactly. You don't have to marry this person. We're just looking for any, we're taking the best. A hot bang from the best of a bad group, from the lights have come on. take what you can get you know yeah you don't have to it doesn't say that much about you know you just like to shag the most who do you want to shag the most you know is it jeremy is it boris yeah and it honestly it's not upsetting yeah but the same time like you but but it's just like yeah this will this will do whereas if you constantly are waiting for the very you know we're all desperate for like our Obama to arrive oh my god and our Obama a lot of people hated Obama

exactly and our Obama does not look like he's he's coming anything time soon. Not for a while. Not for a while. So there's no point sitting it out waiting for Obama just like pick someone in the club. Yeah. Look, they're the, they're the people who are here now and they both sort of is shown that they're interested. Yeah. They've given the they once looked in your direction. And that is enough. And that's and that's, and that's enough. They'll come home with you. But thank you so much, Marie. What's your Twitter handle for people who want to follow me? It's at Young Vulgarian. And may you tell us why? Oh, just because I was trying to find a name for my Twitter ages ago.

and there's a really good song called Hey Calm Young Vulgarians from a band called The Makeup and also young vulgarians were, they were so cool, they were girl gangs in the 50s in New York who had the massive, but I know the kind of Amy Winehouse type beehives

and they'd hide knives and razors and their massive beehives for street fights. Good Lord! Oh, God! She's put some thought into her Twitter handle. I'm very jealous of your agenda. Marie's book is out now. It is called,

Haven't you heard? What? What's that to do? I haven't heard I don't know By the book God's sake Gossip power

and how politics really works And is it What is it like A specifically good place To buy that Like do you prefer it On Amazon or not on Amazon

I don't know I feel really bad Because lots of people I've been like Oh like I really want to be helpful Like what's the way That gets to the most money And it's like listen

I'm baby I don't know I'm baby I'm baby I believe if you get him From a large bookshop Like Waterstones Like Waterstones

Other bookshops Available It means that They then have a note to be like, oh, a lot of people, this was very popular. Let's move this to the front. Go to Waterston's. I believe buying it in person is the most helpful.

And please, we've not got a book, but we have got a Twitter handle at Nobody Panic Pod. And I'm at StivMBS. There's a 5. At Tessicoats. No cool history. There's no cool history. It's just our names and mine's got a five in it.

Please like, subscribe, buy Marie's book. I hope that was helpful. Podcast is called the polling the pod. Pauling the pollsters? Pooling politics. Polling politics. So, yeah, I feel like you were close. You were close.

polling politics, listen to Marie's podcast. And yeah, I mean, look, best of look, everyone on December 12. Pick someone in the club. And for God's sake, vote. Well, if you haven't registered, you can't. But register for next time, please. Register now for next time. There'll be another one in two weeks.

We know that. And now you know if it's a hung parliament, you know what that means? And even if you think, what's a bloody poem, I'm not even done doing it. Go and do it. Come on. Come on. Don't leave the club alone. No, exactly.

Take anyone. Bye.