Normal Gossip - Losing Control of the Algo with Laci Mosley

Episode Date: July 29, 2026

Laci Mosley returns for a story about a couple of microinfluencers so committed to image management that their friends can't tell if they're still together. We are now on YouTube. Be sure to follow us on there at @DefectorMedia where you can watch today’s episode.Subscribe to our newsletter for writing from Rachelle, Se'era, Jae, Alex, and Kelsey, plus blog recommendations and secrets!You can support Normal Gossip directly by buying merch or becoming a Friend or a Friend-of-Friend at supportnormalgossip.com.You can also find all kinds of info about us and how to submit gossip on our Komi page: https://normalgossip.komi.io/Episode transcript here. Follow the show on Instagram @normalgossip, and if you have gossip, email us at [e-mail] or leave us a voicemail at 26-79-GOSSIP.Normal Gossip is hosted by Rachelle Hampton (@heyydnae) and produced by Se'era Spragley Ricks (@seera_sharae) and Jae Towle Vieira (@jaetowlevieira). Our audio engineer is Samantha Gattsek. Justin Ellis is Defector's projects editor. Show art by Tara Jacoby. Theme music composed by Hrishikesh Hirway.Normal Gossip is a proud member of Radiotopia. Learn about your ad choices: dovetail.prx.org/ad-choices

This is our glass. On this American life, one thing we like is a good mystery. Sometimes about really big things, things you're in the news. But most times, the little mysteries are the best. Our lost and found is currently filled with pants. I don't know what I've never seen this happen. I've got skirts. I've got shorts.

This is true. This is true. Mysteries of every size. Each week, this American life, wherever you get your podcast. Hello and welcome back to season. of normal gossip. I'm your host, Rachel Hampton. And in each episode of this podcast, we are going to bring you an anonymous morsel of gossip from the real world. As y'all know by now, we came to the season determined to bring back some of your all-time favorites, which is why I'm so pleased

to say that today's guest is none other than Lacey Mosley. Lacey Mosley is an actress and comedian known for her starring roles in Fox's Going Dutch and the Icarly Revival, as well as hosting the award-winning scam goddess podcast dedicated to fraud and all those who practice it. Lacey was a guest on this show all the way back in season one, and after her iconic episode, we'll leave him a little bit broke, a little bit mad, aka the episode with the Sorority Sisters in the Hankerchief, none of us have ever been the same. Lacey, welcome back. Hello, Thank you for having me. I am so happy to be here because this is the first time that we've actually been in the studio together.

But you are, I don't know if you know this, but you are one of normal gossips, biggest stars. Everyone loves your episode. When we ask, what is your favorite episode? Everyone is like the one with Lacey. When are you getting Lacey back? So thank you so much for coming back. Thank you. Thank you for having me back.

Yes, we was locked in. I remember the wedding shenanigans. Ugh. And now I'm living them myself. Ooh. Ooh. You know, I feel like every person reaches a certain age and it's like depends on whatever your friend group is like where everyone just starts getting married at the same time.

So I'm in that like wedding, bachelor's, wedding, bachelor's, baby, baby. Yes. Yes. Yes. I feel that. So you and I were both on the very first season of normal gossip. Yes. Which was nine whole seasons ago.

We are now in season 10. And I wanted to ask, has your relationship with gossip changed at all since then? No. I think I had a great relationship, to be honest. Like, things are really going steady over here. We're about to, you know, reach our third anniversary, you know, been getting to, you know, since the playground. Had my pick, my caprician and was ready to stab a hole in that bitch, okay? Because I wanted to know what was going on.

Yes. I think I had a good principle established. As long as it's like, you tell me something messy. If I really need to tell somebody, I'm going to tell somebody 10 states away who's never met you and never will. You know, that's how I keep my gossip alive without getting caught. Exactly. I call that operational security where you have to make sure. That's fancy.

Yeah, your shit is on lock. I don't need things getting back to me. I love that. But the way that you've phrased it now feels like I've had like a therapy session and like, no, no, no, this is healthy what I'm doing. I need to tell your business to my homegirl in Jersey. because it's a part of my healing process. Now I feel like a toxic man who went to therapy. I'm just going to leave with all the phrases and just be using them wrong.

I just feel like you're gaslighting me when you asked me to do my laundry. You know what I mean? It's like you're standing right next to the washer. Like you should do it. Lacey. I'm watching Love Island right now and I'm just like these men have learned too much and also not enough. Nothing.

Nothing. But enough for a 22 year old to really be out here at these. I was like, y'all got the words popping. Exactly. They're like, you know what? I love, you know, black women. I love to, you know, I love to be soft. I love to take care of my woman.

Soon as a baddie light skin come in, this man flying off his seat, I feel blessed. Ooh, she looks just like my ex-girlfriend. Ooh, ooh. They wait to get some of that honeybeed like skin. Like, sir, we literally saw it. We literally saw you. Cicere's my favorite, okay? War regards to be killing.

me because sir you got me not believing my eyes you're telling everybody the men the women and your date and the person you with that you feel this way and i'm watching you do the opposite you almost had me in the first half well i could honestly talk about love island with you forever because it's all i think about right now but a little birdie told me that you have some gossip for me oh yes so i work in the acting industry and one thing we do love to do you do love to do do is gossip. I will say on set, I'm definitely the office gossip. Like now I treated more like a Ponzi scheme.

So it's like, or like a pyramid scheme. So it's like I get my gossip from the masses, but I only take it to the top of the pyramid scheme. You know what I mean? So it's like I'm not sharing it with the other masses. Like I get the, you know, from the PA or from the directors or from the writers or from wherever their group is. and then I bring it back to my little group.

And I was working on the show once. And I could tell slowly was surely just a scammer in my heart. We were in a new city that was starting to take on film and television at the time. And you could just tell that nobody who really worked in that small town new city, I'm not going to be pinpoint specifically. But nobody who worked in that city had ever worked in the film industry before. You could just tell so many people were like kind of faking it until they made it or being each other's references. And like you'll go from set to set and you'll see a lot of crew members who know each other.

because a lot of parts of the crew stick together and they go from job to job with one another. But it wasn't giving that. It was giving like we're all in a scheme together. For example, like definitely the boom operator who was like doing sound in certain places. One of them definitely was also a part-time cocaine salesman. I found that out at a bar one night.

Like I just kept seeing it to make too many trips. And I was like, are they working right now? Like, figure that out. And then that ended up being my gossip plug source because, you know, the drug plug. It's like a hairstylist. Like they, your drug man, and I was like,

because you don't care what you tell your drug man, because you're buying drugs from them. Who are they to judge you? Like, you know, like you're already doing something shady. Exactly. It's like, you're not going to tell anyone important. We're already doing illegal things. I know you're not going to wrap me out.

Right. I feel like, yeah, you should. And if you really need to gossip with somebody, yeah, you should have a friend who's involved in lots of shady activities and won't judge if you need the gossip about yourself. But, yeah, so they gave me all the tea. So there was also, we had to hire like specialists for different things. So like we had a fight choreographer who when I tell you this lady could have never been doing this professionally because at one point she was physically harming people.

Like she was like, okay, so we had a stage like a fist fight. And she was like, okay, you're going to grab the back of her hair like this but not put any tension on it. And I've seen that before. So it looks like you're grabbing the back this person's head. Then she was like, then you're going to hit your fist. Go hit your fist like this. So it looks like you're punching her. And the actress who was like doing this with this choreographer was like, okay, this hurts.

And she was like, no, it doesn't hurt. It doesn't hurt. It was like, ma'am. She said it hurts. She's like, no, no, she's good. She good. It was like, okay. After her, I was like, something's up.

So she got let go. Then we had to work with animals. And there was this one raccoon lady. She, like, we came past and like, it was in between scenes. And we had this raccoon all set. She was like fist fighting with the raccoon. Like, she's fighting with the raccoon. Like, they just squaring up.

It's like, me, mink, me. with the raccoon. And we were like, hey, ma'am, like, are you okay? Like, why are you being the raccoon? She was like, oh, this is how you train them. This is how they learn. You got, and I was like, you just got, you got, you got to go WWE with the fucking raccoon. I don't know if that's how you train animals, ma'am.

I don't know. Next day, the raccoon lady is gone. Mind you, I'm getting all the tea for everybody. The raccoon lady is gone. And I'm telling the girls about the fight with the raccoon. They're like, yeah, something is weird going on here. I was like, I'm going to get a sandwich. So I'll go to get a sandwich.

And I would get these little lettuce turkey wrap. So they were light. I don't know. It's basic, but I love it. Anyway, so I go get my lettuce turkey wrap. And I order it. And then the lady turns around. Tell me why it's the raccoon lady.

Now she's making sandwiches. I don't know if I want the animal handler handling my food. I was like, how many jobs do you have on this set? Yeah. So then, of course, I talk to the plug. And the boom plug, the sound plug. Yeah. And they were like, oh, yeah.

There's a lot of people on this set who just got a recommendation. They're just floating around. Like, you know, she know, she knows where to get raccoons. But she, but sometimes, you know, she mostly does crafty. And I was like, what do you mean she knows where to get raccoons? What are we doing here, guys? And so last thing at this gossip tea that I had to just let everybody know, we had a lady who she was working on the show.

I won't get too jargony. But let's just say, like, she's like an assistant to one of the directors and, like, does the scheduling tells you when you show up on set. Mm-hmm. So she, we always thought like maybe she had like a little like a tick or like some kind of like whatever, you know, and like nobody is able to. So we don't give a fuck about that. But like she was always like really like intense. And she would call us every night to tell us when we needed to come to work the next day. That's not normal. Like typically you just get an email. Your reps get it and you get it. She would call us every night. And some of us live together. So we would start getting together. And we'd be like, oh, someone's all on the phone. We would all run to the same room. So she didn't call us individually. Because we were like, why are you calling us? Like this is strange. And she always had this like little, you know, tick. But like, like, oh, so we'd be like. The tick wasn't weird. It was just like the calling and that kind of stuff, right? So tell me why my drug plug, the sound operator tells me one day she was like,

oh, that's not a tick. That lady is constantly masturbating. And I was like, what are you talking about? And she was like, yeah, we were in a meeting and this fell out her pocket. And she shows me a picture because I was like, you're lying. You're lying, you're lying, bro. Like, you can't get howl your own supply drug dealer sound person. And they were like, no, no, I swear.

Show me a picture. And it's definitely the carpet that was in our production office. And there was a vibrator sitting like under the tape. like at their production meeting it had fell out of her pant leg and the cocaine sound person was like I went to pick it up and then I was like oh god and then I had to take a picture of it because I knew nobody would believe me so this whole time we thought this lady was just like we didn't think nothing of her little you know I twitch or whatever but we just thought she was weird for calling us all the time but also apparently every time I was twitching and she was jerking and stuff like she

she's standing in front of me just dittling away just DJing like it's like Diplo like there's no tomorrow. Yeah. My jaw has been on the floor, I think, for two minutes straight. I have so many questions. I have so, I have a, I have a lot, I have a lot of questions. I don't even know if you can answer any of them. I'm just like, what kind of vibrator are you using?

Is it just constantly on or is it a remote control thing where you just have a little app on your phone? From the picture I saw, it wasn't given technology. It was giving like hand crank. It was given like, you know, when I never understood this joke in sitcoms when I was a kid, but the kids always be like, oh, I needed batteries. So I went next to Mom's bed. And I googled for so long how people were masturbating with batteries. Like I thought that they was like rubbing the positive charge on their coochie or something.

Because I was like, what? I don't understand how this worse. We're playing magnets with the kids. Right. Am I supposed to play magnets with my clint or sticking it in there? and the bunny gets the boom boom. But what's supposed to happen with the batteries on their own? And then as an adult, I was like, oh, it's batteries for the battery device.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I was like, what are they doing with these? They biting them open and that battery assing? No, you're like, what is supposed to get me off about a battery? I was really confused. But yes, it was given that it was one of those where you had to put the door cells in Miss Mammon and turn, you know, righty-tidey-lucy-loose. Mm-hmm, yeah.

Which then I'm like, so you had to crank it on. and then put it back in and then walk around all day. But finding out the boom operator was the drug dealer was definitely my insight to all the gossip there. Mind you, I'm not involved in any of these particular situations. I didn't even work with the raccoon. I was just skulking around, just peeping, just like, and what did they say? Like, that's my favorite thing to do.

What's going on here? I mean, I can imagine. Was the boom operator slash cocaine dealer good at his job at boom operating, not cocaine dealing? No, we had a lot of soundness. issues. Like, we had a lot of sound issues actually. Like, I'm pretty sure I did an ADR session, which is where actors go in and, like, if they can't hear you or they want to put a line in the scene on your back or something, like, you'll come in and you'll just do it like voice

over, like I'm talking to you right now through this microphone. I went into one. I remember leaving and they were like, this is some of the worst sound we've ever had to deal with. Like, he literally said that to me. He was like, I've never had people have to come in and basically resay the whole show. Like, yeah. Oh my God. I'm going to be thinking about this for a really long time. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. I think both. I think both.

It's right in there. It's right in my brain. But now it's time for me to tell you a little story that you hopefully will never forget. Hopefully never forget. Okay. Feels like a threat, but I'm going. It's not a threat. Today's story is about influencers.

Oh, yay. Specifically micro-influencers, which are. are basically influencers who have under 100,000 followers. So Lacey, if you were to pivot to becoming an influencer, you would actually be a little bit too big time to be a micro-influencer. So this question might be unrelatable to you. But how do you feel about influencers in general? Definitely relatable.

And I think I have a more skewed viewpoint of it because I know so many, like micro and like huge like millions and millions of followers, influencers. So I have a different perspective on it because it takes a ton of work to look like you're not doing shit. Like those people are filming content like for days and days on end. They're like having writer sessions where they're coming up with their next bit. Even the ones who aren't very good or maybe they just do slice of life or maybe they're just replicating something you just saw on TV with bad wigs and you find it entertaining. All of those people have to like make those, you know, things, that content, they have to stay abreast on what's how to. happening in social media constantly,

not missing any trends, waves, trends. It's a hard job. And you can't take days off because the algorithm punishes you if you don't feed the monsters. So they got to post every day around the same time, some of them multiple times a day. And not all of their posts are getting hits like that. If you go on their actual page,

you'll see it's more about consistently feeding it. So for me personally, I have a soft spot for them because I hate posting. And if I do my makeup and my hair, because I got to get in full drag, otherwise people going to think I'm suffering from a illness. Like, I have set myself up poorly.

I wish I had been on the line yapping would have bonded on 10 years ago because then that could be my brand. Now if I do that, they're like, she's on drugs. I told you guys she was on drugs. So they got it. And I have respect for them. Yeah.

I wish more influencers, but they can't do it. But I wish they could be honest about what a day in the life looks like so that people understood that this is fully a job because so many regular people now look at it and think it's so easy that now this is their goal in life. and is pissing me the fuck off. Like, I'm so tired of, like,

you're a registered nurse, ma'am. Your patient is coding. Why are you dancing in front of this camera, okay? Like, you don't see them lights back there? He's kicking the leg. He's reaching for the light, ma'am. Why are you not doing your job? Why are you over here violating HIPAA for likes and repost?

Can you be for real? I feel like there's this point where you're watching someone who is not an influencer, try to become an influencer. And there's that, like, medium part where they're not doing either necessarily well. Have you seen this? Yes, but again, because I work in a very, like, cringe industry, like, baby, when I would go

on dates, I stopped telling people in the beginning of my actor that I was an actor because I would go on days, but it was a good litmus test. They'd be like, what do you do? I'd be like, oh, so where, what restaurant do you work at? Oh, so you ate tables? Like, that type shit. I'm like, okay, fuck you. And then the other side is they'll be like, oh, so what have you been?

And what can I see you? And please list everything you've ever worked in ever. Why it's okay to do that for actors? But if you're an account and I can't be like, all right, well, go ahead and pull up that LinkedIn. I need to see how many recommendations you got. You was at Ernest and Young for how long? Did you know Tommy? Like, we don't do that to people with normal jobs.

No, you're right. You're right. I say actors, anybody in entertainment, podcasting, influencing on social media, you have to get through that weird middle space where it's completely cringe. So all of you, in between influencer, where you're not quite famous, enough. Listen, fake it till you make it. Keep putting up that content, girl.

And keep holding it up to the camera. One day they're going to like it. One day they're going to like it. They're going to click. And then people are going to stop playing with you. You get up there right now. You give them a. You give them a.

You give them a. Everybody keeps asking me. You give them a. Can I tell you guys what I am in love with right now? Okay. You give them a link to click. Wow. This is actually a perfect segue.

into our story today because our friend of a friend who is named Madeline, when she met her best friend Emma, Emma gave no signs of wanting to be an influencer. When Emma and Madeline met, Emma was just the only girl in Madeline's biochemistry class who actually had her shit together enough to actually help Madeline out when Madeline broke her ankle and had to miss a full week's worth of class. Literally no one else had notes worth copying except for Emma. And in college, This is enough to form a very intense and codependent friendship, which is exactly what Madeline and Emma did. It helped that Emma was the kind of person who, like, when you're in, you're in, you know,

once she's friends with you, you were going to be introduced to her mom, her dad, her best friend, her cat, her dog. Everyone in her life is going to know who you are. She's like a lovebommy friend. Yeah. You know those friends who instantly are like obsessed with you and then all of a sudden, every phone call you have is FaceTime. and it's like you're the center of their universe

until they find someone else to glom onto. You can always figure out who these people are based on their Instagram because they be with a new person every week and that be their new best friend and this goes across all genders. Like my not, Miami's, my everybody's. Like we all know that one friend who's probably an acquaintance of yours,

but that's what she does for the first week. Oh my God, we were so similar. Oh my gosh, she gets twins. We should get the same outfit. Oh, my God, let's take pictures in it. I'm going to post this. This is so cute. Do you like this?

he's going to like it, that person. Yes, I describe this as being a slut for commitment. You just want to commit to literally anything and everything. Our friend of a friend, Madeline, is much more of a go with the flow type. This leads to a perfect, like, type A, type B style friendship. Yeah. Madeline and Emma end up getting an apartment together after college. And this is when Emma meets Caleb.

One of Emma's many commitments is to secondhand furniture. Like, you won't catch her dead in a lot. IKEA. One day, Emma scores like a really sick deal on a vintage coat rack that is too big to fit in her Toyota Camry. So enter her night and shining armor, Caleb, a hot apprentice carpenter who happened to be at the same estate sale looking for some furniture to refurbish and who most importantly owned a pickup truck. I like Caleb so far. He got hobbies. He's making money. He's building stuff with his hands. He's not on the bows of the internet hating imaginary women, okay? He's building a house.

We love that. Exactly. And Caleb refused to let Emma pay him for the ride. So Emma offered him a drink. And from there, our friend of her friend Madeline basically gets a third roommate because Emma and Caleb are locked the fuck in. Of course. Emma gives mail-centered.

It's giving Aiden and Carrie Bradshaw. All love to all of my former roommates, but the thing that I hated the most was when they got a boyfriend because why is there a strange man in my home? Why can I not go to the bathroom anymore? Oh, yeah. They got a boyfriend. You got a boyfriend. It's like having a half bath, you know?

Like, it's not fully funny. But it's in your home. Can't shower in there, but it's in your home. Yes. Luckily, Caleb is pretty chill. He's quiet. He's laid back. He loves top chef just as much as Madeline does.

So they actually do end up becoming homies. And a couple months into dating Emma. Caleb does Emma and Madeline a huge solid. He introduces them to his little sister, Gabby. Now, at first, Madeline is like, I am not hanging out with my best friends, boyfriends, kid sister. But then they all go out together and it is immediately clear that Gabby is like a down-ass bitch. She not only gets them into the club for free, she flirt so hard with the manager that she gets them a table and free bottle service. Oh, so his sister's a baddie.

Yeah, yeah. And from there, everyone's locked in. It's Gabby, it's Emma, it's Caleb, it's Madeline. they have a few really good years together. They throw parties, they have brunches, they take trips together, they all get their first real jobs. And then everything kind of goes sideways because 2020 happens, a year where no one's life was changed. No, no. No.

There's not indoor activities. Were my hands raw from the constant washing? Absolutely. I was washing like I was in fucking grazing admi. I'm like, I ain't had sex in Naria closet with a doctor, but here I am, scrubbing. And then every day. So this obviously is going to addle their relationship because they like to spend time together because COVID is now hit. Yeah.

Madeline's corporate job goes fully remote. So she ends up moving back in with her parents. She spends all of 2020 and 2021 regressing into a teenager in her pink childhood bedroom. She saves a ton of money. And she spends all of her free time on Instagram and TikTok planning all the trips that she's going to go on as soon as the world opens back up. Meanwhile, Caleb and Emma decide not only to move in together, they decide to buy a house together. Yeah, that was some COVID behavior. Madeline does not find out about the whole house thing from Emma.

She finds out from Instagram, specifically from the shared Instagram account that Caleb and Emma start the day after closing on their home. They have a shared Instagram. Oh, no. Oh, we know where this is going. Caleb and Emma had bought a fixer-upper, and they wanted to chronicle their journey of turning. their house into a home. Natalielin's like, I kind of wish you guys had just gotten engaged, like normal people, but I guess I'll follow this account, even though all the captions are in that like influencer cadence that you just did so well. Can I get another demonstration?

Of course. So guys, I have some news. Okay, I'm freaking out. I can't even believe it's real. My life just feels like it's changing on a dime. First, the world completely shuts down and we can't even get an avocado toast in the morning. And then I find that I'm spending all of this time with the love of my life who I love to create with and I can't wait to create more, which is why we're partnering right now with Home Depot, who's going to help us on our journey not only to build our dream home, but our dream life together. Please, I'm so excited to share this journey. Like and subscribe. Oh my God. Caleb. Caleb, stop making a video. Caleb.

I'm telling them about our love. Oh my God. He's so silly. We just like are so silly all the time. But yeah, if you click the link in my bio, you can donate directly to COVID's couple. Yeah. Emma and Caleb actually end up gaining way more momentum than anyone expected.

Like a few of their videos go mildly viral. One day they find this like boarded up fireplace in the house. And the people love the way Emma just like screaming. when she sees it. So within like six months, they end up with 18,000 followers. It's when they get a $500 grout sponsorship that Emma tells Madeline that she thinks it's time to start taking this seriously. So Emma quite literally quits her day job as an interior designer and then tries to convince her friend Madeline to do the same. She's like, I need someone to help with video editing. Wouldn't it be so fun to work together? And it's not like you're paying rent anyway. You're at home with your parents.

Would you work with your best friend? Not this friend because the way that she offered that was not a partnership. I'm already telling me one, you're not going to give me no money. Because you was like, you already don't need money. So you might as well work for me for free instead of, you know, using your free time to do other things that are free labor. Like, what are you saying? And then when she was like, oh, my God, it would be so much fun. It feels like you're going to dump all the work on me and you do the fun part.

Because I ain't ever here nowhere in here did Madeline tell Emma. but she had a passion for graphic design and video editing. I didn't hear that. Well, Madeline feels the exact same way. She's like, love you so much, bestie, but no thank you. She also knows how type A, Emma can be. And she's like, I just don't want that smoke. I don't want to be dealing with you all in my business like that.

So Emma actually ends up hiring Gabby, Caleb's little baddie sister. Gabby had gotten laid off at the beginning of the pandemic and had been living with her and Caleb's parents ever since. So she's like, I guess I'm bored enough to help out. She really trying to find somebody who could be easily homeless. She could have gone online and been like looking for a video editor to help me make content. She could have gone anywhere to find somebody who had any kind of examples and proof that they were good at this job. But no, you can tell she's about to be shady because she's like, who is vulnerable and near me?

Like, what? She was like, yeah, because she just lost her job. So I know she's on the brink of homelessness. She'll do it. Like, why can't you find somebody who does this? Emma? Gabby does occasionally send Madeline texts that say, save me in screenshots from videos of Emma and Caleb that make them look especially deranged. And she does tell Madeline that Emma has gotten really into using words like shiplap and Wayne's cotting and she's always talking about crown molding. But it mostly sounds like this arrangement works out for everyone. Yeah. Or at least it works out well enough that it doesn't interfere with Madeline's plans. After, about a year and a half of living at home and saving money, Madeline decides now is her time. It is hot back summer, which was that summer in 2021, where we're all like, I'm safe from

COVID now. It can't hurt me. Oh, right. Yeah, she got the jab. Now she's ready to get stabbed. Exactly. Her plan is to spend six months overseas. She invites everyone she knows to join her for like various portions of the trip, including Emma, Caleb and Gabby, who all agreed to come join Madeline for two weeks in Italy. How do you feel about vacationing with a couple when you're not in a couple yourself? I've done it.

One year I hosted a birthday party and I got this huge house and put all the couples together and the people who were single had bedrooms. You know what I mean? I'm the third wheel when it comes to my couple friends. We can be all out together. I'm like, woo, we have a good time chat. Like, it's a non-issue for me, but they're younger than me, I can tell. So it's that couple where, yeah, they're a couple, but it's like two young people together.

Are y'all really together until we get to a, you know what I mean? It's either a certain commitment or a certain age. It's just like, they're a friend group. Yeah, yeah. Madeline has been on weekend trips with them before. So she knows their compatible travel buddies. And she's like, it's only two weeks out of a six months trip. And Gabby will be there.

So she's not too worried about vacationing with this specific couple. Yeah. She says her goodbyes. She sets off for the first part of her trip, which is in England. She's getting ready to go out one night. when she gets a call from Emma. Madeline figures this is just like a logistical phone call since Italy is in a few weeks and Emma's the kind of person

who like needs to go over the itinerary multiple times. So Madeline's prepared to answer the phone like, yes, we're going to the Trevi Fountain. Yes, we can recreate the scene from Lizzie McGuire movie. We've already talked about this before. Yes, we're going to see the Pope. We're going to have a deep dish with him. What's happening?

Okay. But this is not what Emma has called for. Emma's like, so I've got some news. And for a second, Madam's like, are you pregnant? But then Emma says, me and Caleb have broken up. Madeline is shocked. She thought that Emma and Caleb were in game. And Emma's like, yeah, it was a really hard decision.

Obviously it's complicated because we own this house together. But we're still friends. And we're still planning to come to Italy together. So she broke up with him. him. She's like, we're mature adults. We can handle this. And also we bought non-refundable plane tickets. There it is. Okay. It's like nobody, it's just like roommates. Nobody wants a roommate. Okay. That is a friend of financial circumstance. Okay. Sometimes it works out in their lifelong. When y'all was living together, that was a circumstance. And she was like, no, like, I love him.

He can still come to Italy because one, we, um, we need to get a lot of content in Italy. so I got to get this hand holding in. And too, also we do on a home together. So the business isn't dissolved yet. This is a business relationship. She should just stay with her for photos. I wouldn't be mad at that. Y'all be roommates.

Y'all do your photo shoots twice a week. Live your life. Well, do you feel any differently about vacationing with a couple if the couple is broken up? So here's the thing. My friend's side is like, yeah, we all came here to have good vibes and have a trip. So that. But if these were the type of friends that I, I had.

Then the other type of side of me is kind of like, well, we're going to have an interesting trip. Like, you know, they're going to be fighting a lot. You know, and as long as they're not like, get drunk, crash out and we're in Italy jail, I feel like, you know, might be entertaining. You know what I mean? Like, if I trip and fall, that won't be the talk of the trip. You know, they were throwing gelato at each other on the Vespas. No, you're right.

That's what everybody's talking about. You're right. You're like, there's nothing that I can do that would be the most interesting part of this trip because y'all are going to be up to some mess. Yeah, but you're right. If they want to have a copacetic peaceful trip, it probably will fuck up the vibes a little bit. And it's clear that she's the initiator.

She was like, no, it's just a con. She doesn't mess somebody with more followers is what it is. Probably trying to move him into the house. That's what she wants. She wants a hype house. She don't want to be with that man. Madeline doesn't necessarily feel like she has a whole lot of options here. So she's like, okay, yeah.

I guess that sounds fine. And this is when Emma is like, By the way, would you mind keeping this to yourself for a little bit? Emma explains that they are only telling Madeline and Gabby about the breakup for now, and it's mostly because they're all about to go on this trip together. Emma and Caleb are not going to tell the rest of their friend group about the breakup just yet, and they aren't going to tell the public because they just got a big sponsorship. So they need to keep posting to their couples account for another month to fulfill their end of the contract.

I told you they're in a relationship business. And I don't understand why that has to end just because y'all don't want to be romantically involved anymore, okay? You know how hard it is to sell a house in this economy? Y'all gonna go probably under already. Stay together and just date other people. Get y'all content. Y'all can be business partners.

Now, I know I just said Madeline feels like she doesn't have a lot of options, but do you feel like she has any options other than going on vacation with a broken up couple that is pretending still be together for Instagram. She's already there. So they're coming to her. So I think it's more of a thing of like, well, I think it was cool of Emma to tell her ahead of time, hey, I'm coming with drama.

Just let you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So she told her ahead of time. So it's not like she just pulled up and was like, oh, by the way, we broke up, but we still going to shoot content. Everybody act normal. But when the cameras is off, we're going to be boxing. But then when the cameras come back on, everybody act like I didn't throw that drink in his face.

Y'all got me? Okay. And action. Like, you know, she's, didn't do that. So I want to give them some grace. I'll kind of be like, well, do you want him staying in my place? Because you're my home girl. So do you want him to get a hotel? And then you stay with us and his sister can stay with us. I would offer some things like that if I was uncomfortable, but she's kind of in a weird position because she doesn't have the choice not to go. But she does

have a choice to tell him no and not to come. But we know she's not going to do that. And she doesn't. No. You're right. We sure she wasn't going to do that. So I don't even offer that. Well, a couple of weeks past, Madeline does her best to put this out of her mind and enjoy her trip. She goes from England to France to Portugal before finally landing in Rome, where she meets Gabby. Gabby's flight is a day earlier than Emma and Caleb, so Madeline gets to enjoy like a day of peace with Gabby. And it's not until Madeline and Gabby gets their Airbnb that they're staying in that Madeline even brings up Emma and Caleb. Madeline and Gabby are trying to fall asleep. They're both like tipsy and exhausted from their first day in Italy, but it's too hot to fall asleep.

So they're like laying in the dark, staring at the ceiling. When Madeline is like, how do you think Emma and Kamen? Caleb are going to break the announcement. And Gabby's like, what announcement? Oh! And Madeline's like, well, they're going to have to tell their followers about their breakup at some point, right? And Gabby, like, sits straight up in bed.

And she's like, breakup. What breakup are you talking about? Madeline turns the light on and she's like, are you fucking with me right now? And Gabby's like, are you fucking with me right now? And Madeline starts panicking because she is known for like never spelling a secret. So she's like, oh my God, I didn't mean to tell you. I thought they told you. told me that they told you.

But before Madeline can really spiral, Gabby starts cracking up. She has this expression on her face that only a little sister can have when she gains the upper hand. Gabby's like, honestly, thank God you do not know how many times I've had to edit their fights out of videos. She was like, this is going to save me so much time. I hope Gabby continues to want a content create for Emma, but she's just like, oh, this going to save me so much time because we had so many fight scenes we had to edit out.

One time she was chasing them. Like, we have to finish the scene. And I was like, I can't use any of this. Honestly, it's giving Whitney and Bobby. So, you know, this is a good thing. It's giving Spencer and Heidi, but, you know, love it. So they talk through everything that Madeline knows for the next hour, and they decide that the most likely explanation for why Gabby doesn't know yet is that

Emma and Caleb want to tell Gabby the news in person. But does that make sense to you? Do you feel like that's Emma's plan? No. Are these people like Gabby's parents getting a divorce? divorce? Like, can everybody grow up? Like, y'all broke up? I don't know if this is like, hey, Gabby, we need you to sit down. Yes, yes. Put down your white claw. This is important. Like, we're all adults. Just tell you you're breaking up. No, it's not a good excuse. The next morning,

Emma and Caleb arrived, luggage and tow. Madeline and Gabby wait for them to break the news, but they're just like chatting and unpacking, talking about the flight. Emma says she's going to go take a quick shower and she gives Caleb a kiss on the cheek. on her way out the room. I think that Emma just messy and lives for the drama. It doesn't give. It's giving that the only person

she told that she was breaking up with him was Madeline. I don't think he knows. The sister knows. Caleb doesn't know. She was just on FaceTime with his grand nanny like, you know, 10 minutes ago.

Like, she's... We're getting married. Right. She's trying on wedding gals. I told this girl she's breaking up with him. Like, please be serious, Emma. It's giving she just needs to be

main character all the time. Okay, ma'am. Well, they all go to fancy dinner together. During the meal, M&Kalb swapped plates halfway through. Caleb keeps his arm around, like, the back of Emma's chair. And Madeline keeps asking things like, but how are you really doing? And Gabby's like getting in the mix, too. She's like, I feel like it's been so long since I've seen you two.

What's going on? But M&Kalb are giving them nothing. They just keep talking about like their most recent renovation project, which is apparently a nightmare. And as they're walking off dinner, Madeline keeps trying to get Emma alone to ask her, what the fuck is happening right now. But Emma is sticking to Caleb like glue. She's like, babe, do you have the polar with camera? Babe, come look at this.

And after a certain point, it is clear to Madeline that Emma is avoiding being alone with her. So when Gabby and Madeline returned back to their room, they immediately start discussing what they've just witnessed. They're like, okay, did Emma and Caleb get back together on the plane? Is Madeline being actively gaslit? Or did she maybe just hallucinate that whole conversation with Emma? What's your theory here? I think that maybe Emma was just in her feelings when she was talking to Madeline and then decided.

And we all know that one girl guy, whoever it is, who complains in your friend group about their relationship. But then when you give them sound advice or you're like, I don't know, leave them. They're like, oh, yeah, yeah, for sure, packing up this stuff right now about to be to the left, to the left, all the stuff, in the left and the left. Yeah, it was on the left and then I brought it right back inside. We still together. Like, why are you bothering me? You know you don't want to leave this person. Just tell me you want to vent and I can support your venting and we can move on.

But don't be asking me for no solutions to a problem that you're enjoying. Oh, it is so annoying. So she might have been doing that and then changed her mind and was like, my man, my man, my man, as soon as he popped up. But this all could have been solved if any of y'all were direct people. I don't have just been at the dinner like, hey, is it just online rumors that you're breaking up? Or like, yes. You know how people talk.

No, literally. But also I feel like Emma's lying because why would you tell me, don't tell anybody, but you said everybody on this trip knows. Could Madeline and Gabby just ask outright? What's happening? Yes. Do they? No.

Of course not. Madeline is like, I don't want to cheat myself out of a perfectly good mystery. I've got six months of traveling. And Gabby kind of wants to see how long it's going to take Caleb and Emma to get around and telling her. She's like, how long can they actually keep this up? So the next day the plan is to go to the Trevi Fountain at 7 a.m. So Caleb and Emma can shoot some content before it gets too crowded.

7 a.m. is too early for me to do anything, especially on a vacation. Right. But Emma and Caleb promised to pay for breakfast if Gabby and Madeline indulge their early morning photo shoot. Madeline is just like sitting by the side, barely awake, watching them work. The whole thing is just incredibly surreal. Maybe because it's so early or maybe because Madeline genuinely cannot tell one way or another whether her friends have broken up. Like Caleb is twirling Emma around while Gabby is shooting video. They're laughing together as Emma is like, throwing a coin into the fountain. The whole hallucination theory is starting to feel more and more real the longer this goes on. Right. Emma's like reviewing the footage with Gabby and explaining

the rule of thirds to her. And if the expression on Gabby's face is anything to go by, this is not the first time this has happened. Meanwhile, a sweet elderly couple approaches Caleb, who has just been like staring off into the middle distance, disassociating. So this couple is like, what brings you to Italy? Isn't Rome romantic? Are you here for you? a wedding and Caleb shakes his head like, nope, just here to see the sights. And this old man is like, is one of these young ladies your girlfriend? And Madeline

could swear she sees Caleb hesitate for a moment. But then he points in Emma and is like, she's my girlfriend. And the old lady is like, how long have you two been together? Caleb's like five years. And the old man is like, five years, why have you not married her? Right. How is it that you keep a

girl waiting for five years? Caleb is like blushing. Emma has stopped lecturing Gabby, meanwhile Gabby has like the biggest sheet-eating grin on her face, she's like, yeah, Caleb, why haven't you proposed yet? What's going on? What does she do that? This is a little sister-coded.

Gabby saw gas and shot her fire and she brought gasoline. She was like, oh, what shall be? Accelerate. Let's get this going. Yes. This only makes Caleb blush even harder. Before he mumbles, I'm waiting for the right time, I guess, which is not a good enough reason for the old man who.

gives him like a very long lecture about how it is not right to make a woman wait. Like this old man goes in in the way that only an old Italian man can. And honestly, love that for elderly people. God willing, I get old. I'm about to be all in your business telling you things you never asked me to tell you. I don't care. I'm old. Now I get to do whatever I want because I made it this far.

Y'all don't respect me anyway. Y'all want to throw me in the home. So I'm about to be in your business. I'm cutting you in line. Like, I'm still in the last Cineabon. Like, please, I'm old and now I'm a minute. So I love that this old man is like, what are you doing? Five years, you don't love her.

You don't love her. Yes, old man, you deserve that. How long would you be able to go before calling your friends out on their bullshit? I mean, I would have done it immediately. But if we're going to wait this long, this isn't the moment. Because it's already awkward for Caleb with this old man be like, why you don't love her, you don't love her, you don't make a wife. It's a me, an old guy, Mario.

Like, you know, he's going with enough. I'd probably get him at dinner later and be like, yeah, y'all haven't, you know, I want to know why she's saying that. But also now I think she's a little crazy because why not put me aside and be like, oh, everything's fine now. Yeah. Madeline is like, I don't think this is the right time either. So she waits and she waits.

They're on their bus to Florence. Madeline and Gabby are sitting behind Emma and Caleb and they see Emma shake off Caleb's arm. But by the time they get off the bus, Emma and Caleb are holding hands. again. Gabby decides to go to bed early that night since it doesn't look like they're going to confess anytime soon, so Madeline gets a drink with Emma and Caleb, and they're not even pretending to touch each other anymore. They're no longer talking in whee's. At one point, Emma makes a comment about how Caleb's mom never liked her. And Madeline's like, okay, past tense, they have broken up. I'm not insane. Here's the point where I begin to question our friend of a friend because

despite this very compelling evidence, she still does not just ask Emma and Caleb point blank what is going on or why they're pretending to still be dating in front of Gabby. Like the next morning at breakfast when Gabby's rejoined them, Emma butters Caleb's toast for him and he kisses her hand. They're sightseeing all day. Madeline is sightseeing all day. Emma, Caleb, and Gabby are shooting content. And at one point, Emma is like asking Gabby to do a third take of a video of her like trailing her hand along with Stonewall and Gabby finally snaps. little bit. She's like third takes are for paying customers only. Emma had her doing all this for free. I mean, I knew she targeted Gabby because she didn't want to pay her a lot. I didn't think she was

going to be paying her a lot of nothing. Emma's like, oh, I'm sorry. I thought you wanted to learn how to do it right. Okay, Emma must be a baddie too. Because I'm like, it's giving that both of these other two friends, the little sister and the Madeline girl are way too obsessed with Emma. Why are you over here looking at their every interaction? What do you mean you saw her buttered his toast and then he lingered his lips on her hand. Like, are you in a Nancy, are you Nancy Myers? Are you writing the rom-com? Why are you so

instinctively, like, focused on every detail of this Emma girl and her man? It's giving, like, single-white female. You're a little too obsessed with this girl. And, like, why do you care? First of all, if I'm in a relationship with my girlfriends, which is what I consider my friendships to be,

and my home girl is on and off with her, man, man, fuck that man. I don't know that, man. We got a lot of man we line at that man i'd have been in the bathroom at powwow's like now where did you say you were on tuesday okay and then that was from eight to 1030 all right yeah yeah yeah we've definitely well we what it was love island came on at six and then we then we waited and watched real housewives and then okay i got the timeline okay we good like i don't i have no allegiance to your man so i don't understand why she cares so much about caleb in this i could get her being upset she was like

i think my friend's lying to me talking about emma but the caleb of it all in the her lingering on their kisses, she's noted every kiss, every time Emma lips get on that man, she's looking. I don't know, Emma, you might not be reliable. Oh, they're at dinner later that night on a beautiful patio in a bustling part of town when Emma puts her fork down and says, Gabby, there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about. Both Madeline and Gabby freeze.

They're like, is it finally happening? Are they finally going to come clean? Emma takes a deep breath and she says, I feel like your heart isn't really in it on this trip, Gabby. If we get good footage now, it'll make the editing easier later. It's supposed to be giving Lizzie McGuire movie, but this is not what dreams are made of. Madeline's jaw is on the floor. Caleb is like once again staring off into the middle distance. Meanwhile, Gabby just stares at Emma for a long moment, and then she's like, you know what? You're right. My heart isn't in it. It must be hard to do something when your heart's not in it. And then she's like, I think I just need to

go out tonight. So she like leaves her pasta on the table and disappears into the night. And Madeline's like, should someone go after her? Like she is in a city that she is not from. But Emma and Caleb are bickering now. Caleb's like, come on, Emma's not like she's getting paid. And Emma's like, excuse you, she gets 5% of all of our sponsorships. That's like $25 a post. Girl, for all that work, please be serious. Also, like, that's what I'm telling y'all. Everybody else thinks they're in a friendship or a relationship, Emma is running a corporation. She said,

this is Love Co. Okay? And y'all need to get with the program. Gabby, your heart's not in it. Yeah, why would my heart be in making videos and posts of you kissing on my brother?

Why would that be my passion? I don't know, but figure it out because at Love Co, we're giving Lizzie McGuire, okay? And right now, you're giving, like, love and hip hop. It needs you to elevate. Elevate.

Like, she's like, girl, you're not Kim K. Why are we at your corporate meeting right now? We thought we were having an Italian dinner. She's like, look, she got quarterly projections. She was like, likes are in the red. Do you see this? We're losing money. We're losing money.

We're losing control of the algo. Okay, you need to shave your beard, Caleb. No one likes beard kissing. She all, everybody asks. 20 minutes of bickering later, Gabby reappears. And with her are three of the hottest ones. men Madeline has ever seen in her entire life. Like, they are glistening in the setting sun.

And Gabby's like, we're going to go dancing, Madeline. Do you want to come with? And she turns to Emma, whose eyes are basically doing that like, Awuga thing, you know? And Gabby's like, sorry, Emma, single girls only. Now this is her way of trying to get this information out of her. She was like, let me go find the sexiest men. Like, no, no, no, don't put your shirt on.

Keep your shirt off. We're going to a restaurant. Like, Gabby, where did you find these poor men? Madeline is like honestly yeah give me the hell out of here I want to go dancing but Emma's her best friend so she's like Are you okay if I go I don't want to abandon you to your fake ex

current boyfriend? Right And she expects Emma to say yes Like go ahead and go instead Emma says no let's all go She tells Caleb to stay behind and get the bill And Caleb like sighs but for a second Madeline swears he looks relieved She's studying that lady man too hard

What do you mean he looks relieved You are studying every breath this man takes every step he makes, every twitching his eye. Like, damn. Emma grabs Madeline's hand and they join Gabby and all the Italian haughties at a club down the street. They dance for hours. At some point, Gabby finds Madeline and they're both tired and ready to go. It's like 2 a.m. But they can't find Emma or Caleb. So they decided to just go back to the hotel by themselves. The next morning, the plan was to get up at 7 a.m. again to take pictures at a cathedral. Madeline is ready in the lobby at 7.15. Gabby is ready in the lobby at 715. Gabby is ready in the lobby at 7.

15. Caleb is ready in the lobby at 715, but there is no sign of Emma. Gabby's like, bro, where's your girlfriend? The love of your life. They're still trying. The one that you're in the relationship with currently and happy with. Caleb says she went on an early morning run. She's just going to meet us at the cathedral. So they all go to this cathedral. They walk around. It's beautiful, but Gabby and Madeline keep exchanging glances as it gets later and later. Finally, at 8.30, Emma shows up. Her hair and makeup are all over the place. She smells very strongly of Italian cologne. But when she gets there, she gives Caleb a big hug.

And then they're right back to holding hands again. Gabby very sweetly is like, did you still want to take some pictures this morning? My heart's really feeling in it today. And Emma's like, that's okay. We can just go get some coffee. And this is the closest Emma and Caleb get to cracking. Like they fly back a few days later with Gabby.

And as far as Madeline knows, they never tell Gabby that they're broken up. They certainly never explained to Madeline what the fuck was going on, but it's no longer Madeline's problem. She has four months of travel left, none of which are with any couples separated or otherwise. A few weeks after the Italy trip, while Madeline's catching some sun on a beach in Croatia, she checks Instagram and sees a breakup post. It is Emma and Caleb.

They're holding hands, and then they like slowly let their hands drop. And they walk out of the frame. Oh, Emma, Emma, is running love code like the Navy, baby, okay? Come on, hands fall out of frame. You'd have thought one of them died. I love it. Come on, Emma. Yes, give me drama.

Madeline's like, oh, thank God they figured it out. Emma and Caleb have also posted a breakup FAQ to their story. Oh, my goodness. Because apparently their couple's account has been getting some snark on Reddit. People thought that their Italy content looked fake. so they're posting to address all the rumors. It's a very thought out. It's like a note-app apology,

where they explained that they actually broke up more than a month ago, but the Italy trip was real. One of the questions in the FAQ is, so who knew you'd been broken up all this time? And the answer is only Madeline and Gabby because we're all going on the trip together. Which she didn't tell Gabby. Maybe she thought Gabby, she backed out of telling Gabby,

because she was like, Gabby is my boo's sister. And what if he decides to be down for my boo? and then she doesn't want to take any more photos of me for my trip. So I can't tell my employee that I fired her brother yet because then she might take the brother's side. That's what it was. Like Emma got back to the hotel room, started looking over union rules and was like,

hmm, if I terminate him, she might terminate as well. I don't want to risk a strike. So I'll just like, no, literally, literally. Madeline calls Gabby and she's like, did you see the post? Like, when did they tell you? And Gabby's like, bitch, they never told me.

They just send me the footage and ask me to make the video. That's how I found out. Listen, that's what you do. If you're closing your business, you're not supposed to tell employees it's the last day they're going to be employed because they might steal. So Emma couldn't let, like, Gabby know that her brother was going to be unemployed because she needed her to finish her job.

And you're right. Madeline was like, so did you see the FAQ? And Gabby was like, yeah, but I'm not reading all of that. And Madeline's like, there. But look at this. part. So she sends Gabby a screenshot while they're on the phone and Gabby is just laughing like, what the fuck is this? And so finally, Madeline reaches her capacity for miscommunication. She adds Emma to the call. And she's like, girly pop. What's going on here? Emma hears the whole saga

from their perspective. And she's like, Gabby, babe, I'm so sorry. I've been so stressed. I literally just forgot that we hadn't told you. Are you buying this? No. It was, it was. It was. It was. It was, was four of y'all on a trip. What do you mean you forgot to tell the one other person who doesn't know? What? Girl, you just didn't want Gabby to take her brother's side. That's all. You can be honest. Madeline and Gabby are on the exact same wavelength that you are. They are not buying this. As soon as they get off the call with Emma, Gabby calls her brother from her laptop and puts them on speakerphone. And Gabby's like, why are you telling 18,000 people that I knew about your breakup when I didn't. And Caleb's like, wait, Emma never told you? Apparently one of the many things that Emma and

Caleb were fighting about on the Italy trip was whose responsibility it was to break the news to Gabby. They figured that the news would hit her the hardest since she was so invested in their relationship. They are such narcissists. Both of them are. It is so funny to me. First of all, you're 18,000 followers, babes. Most of those are bots or unemployed children scattered across the continent. U.S. Like these people, like, you're not the president and first lady. We don't need an FAQ, but I love in your world, you're like, people are going to have questions.

And, you know, I don't want to sit down and answer them all. We might as well just do a frequently asked questions for the community. Oh, how are we going to tell Gabby, it's going to destroy her? She's like our child. Like, baby, these people have lives. But I love that they're living in their own Dululu. I want them to get back together. Y'all need each other.

I love it. I love it. Well, Emma thought Caleb should be the one to tell Gabby since he's her brother and they've known each other longer. And Caleb thought Emma should be the one to tell Gabby since Emma was the one who wanted to hire Gabby in the first place. And in the end, rather than resolve this conflict, they simply just never told her. And I also know that as belabored as that conversation probably felt when they were explaining it to Gabby, the conversation was probably more just like, yeah. Okay, so do you like this for the breakup post? like if we do this yeah yeah that's cool all right who's all right when are you gonna tell gabby no man

i'm not gonna tell her that's your home girl you tell her no it's your sister yeah but like y'all work together so you should probably tell her i don't know i don't want to all right anyway anyway anyway anyway anyway anyway anyway anyway do you like i don't think they're serious i don't think they were like oh but i don't want to tell her but you tell her and they're like someone should tell her yeah anyway oh wait love this look we're getting this is getting traction like i don't think they talked about it for very long at all they're like oh yeah Somebody will tell Gabby. She'll see the post.

She has notifications on. She'll see it. She'll see it. Who do you think is the villain here? Or do you think there is a villain here? No. I think they're all kind of weird. I think Madeline is too obsessed with Caleb.

Like, what you got going on that girl? He must be fine, huh? He's some fine shit because you're looking at his breathing and blinking and heart rate. Like, you'll look too focused on that vein in his neck, baby girl. He's alive. You're good. And then, I think Emma is in her own world. She probably couldn't even tell you who half these people are.

Like, I bet you in two years, if you asked Emma about a Gabby, she'd be like, maybe. I don't know. I meet a lot of people. Like, don't know who she is. And Caleb's like, I don't know, man. I just stand next to her and then like she gives me half the money for like, I don't know what we're doing. But like, yeah, sometimes I'm holding like some grout other times. We're in Italy.

I don't know, man. So I don't think anybody's evil here. I think they're all just a little much. Madeline's treating Emma like she goddamn Kim Kardashian with her 18,000 followers. Like, Madeline, I feel like you telling people too. Like, yeah, well, my friend's an influencer. She's like $18,000. Yeah, she's my best friend.

She's an influencer. Well, I do have a few updates for you. You were right. No one actually really cares about Emma and Caleb's announcement. Their breakup causes literally zero drama. The Reddit posts in the micro influencer snark page gets like 10 upvotes. There's surely nothing worse to think you've got motion and really don't got no motion. I don't have been there, girl.

I don't have been on a red carpet and only one camera flash. I was like, you know what? It's a part of life. Humility. Humility. Now, an FAQ, they was really in Dutaloo World. Let the people ask some questions before you decide they go ask them. But I like, you know, you got to see it to achieve it.

Caleb continues to be a carpenter. And Emma gets a job in the city, which means that they do have to sell their house that they renovated. And during inspection, they find out that Caleb basically did all the renovations incorrectly. but the house does sell. And now Emma is embracing a digital detox lifestyle. And that's the end of our story. I love that she told us about the detox before she did it.

You could just do it. But you know, then she would have to drop the FAQs of why she was doing it. So I understand. Thank you for listening to Normal Gossip. If you have a gossip story to share with us, email us at NormalGossip. at Defector.com. Or you can leave us a voicemail at 2679 Gossip. If you love this podcast and want to support us,

become a friend or a friend of a friend at support normalgossip.com. You can follow the show on Instagram and TikTok at Normal Gossip. You can follow me on all social media at Hey Dene. Subscribe to our YouTube channel at Defector Media to watch today's episode. Normal Gossip is written by me, Rachel Hampton,

and J. Tolviera. This podcast was produced by Sierra Spragley Ricks and J. Tolviera. Our audio engineer is Samantha Gatsit. Emily Cherish is our video editor. Theme music composed by Rishi Kesheirway. The co-creators endoward your queens in normal gossip are Kelsey McKinney and Defector's supervising producer Alex Sujong Loughlin. Justin Ellis is Defector's projects editor. Jasper Wang is Defector's business guy. Tom Lay is our editor-in-chief. This season was made in memory of Dan McLeodd, who ran our merch store, which you can find at normalgossip.com.

Tara Jacoby designed our show art. Thank you to Brandy Jensen. David Roth, Catherine Shoe, Sabrina Embler, Chris Thompson, Dave McKenna, Patrick Redford, and Ray Roddo for your help with this season. Thank you to the rest of the Defector staff. Defector Media is a collectively owned subscriber-based media company. Normal Gossip is a proud member of Radiotopia. I am your host, Rachel Hampton, and remember, you didn't hear this for me.