Not Another D&D Podcast - C3 Ep. 32: The Ones We Couldn't Save (Legends of Irondeep)

Episode Date: April 7, 2023

Duck Team is down another member after Callie is possessed by a strange clockwork leech! Sol struggles to keep the party together, Callie embraces Winter, and Hardwon reveals the truth about his past. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.Music/Sound Effects Include:"A Wizard Tournament" by Emily Axford."Tundra Trudge" by Emily Axford."Balnor the Brave" by Emily Axford."A Memory" by Emily Axford."Angels & Devils" by Emily Axford."Mee Maw's Burden" by Emily Axford."Melora's Boon" by Emily Axford."The Gunslinger's Girl" by Emily Axford."Soul Coins" by Emily Axford."Solving Puzzles" by Emily Axford."Forsaken" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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with brush processing. Code P-A-W-P-A-W. Goodbye, Sweeties. Welcome to the campaign after the campaign. This is not another D&D podcast. Welcome back to Bahumi, everybody. Oh, no! I'm your dungeon master, Brian Murphy, joined by wits hard one shirt foot. Mmm, just a simple clean bite So nice so clean just like popping a mint. It's good Emily Axford

concerned cuz I got This dude warmed his wife you got And then of course we've got called little Tanner. Oh, fuck tartar to them the noles outside his window, but he doesn't even know it's all bufo. Oh, no All right, you know what you fuck to me you fuck me and you're warmed me Jake has made it clear that you can't just not do that you can't just not do a run. Of course you choose. That's also not suitable. All right, why don't we go ahead and do a little recap. So last time you continued your hike to Iron Deep,

breezing through the mountains. Yes. Your first challenge was a pair of cloud breaker birds who swooped into attack you, but using callies in large serpent, you were able to carry all three of you through the open stretch and escape to a fissure in the rocks. Good, go on.

You know what I'm saying so far. Oh, okay. Flala so far. During the chase, you saw a skeleton with some kind of strange clockwork leech attack to its head. Yeah, I actually started to remember that. Yeah, that's familiar.

And spinal cord, and you brought it along with you, more on that later. Yeah, we're still fine. After a night of chillion twister. Yeah. Yeah, another nice night. You'd travel through a cave network and manage to sneak by a singing stone giant and their various traps passing petrified in the holes along the way.

By the time you reached the other side, the team was feeling pretty good. We were all epic. Yes, until hard one revealed that he would only take the crew as far as Iron Deep. The newly bonded party regressed to an awkward night full of strained conversation. And then in the early hours of the morning, Callie awoke feeling ill but went back to sleep after casting lay hands on herself.

About an hour later, she woke up and found herself under some kind of strange influence, sneaking out of the Liamens tiny duck and joining a team of nobles all with clockwork leeches stuck to their head and automaton registered her as an ally and Kelly watched helplessly as she began running along with them and That's where we are now. Okay. Okay. Okay. But first we have to bring up. Yeah. What do we have to bring up? That's Liamens tiny duck. I was ask, is gonna break pretty soon. It's gonna break because the spell ends if you leave its area.

Got it. And its area is like 10 feet. Okay, so your campsite is going to break up our pretty soon, but first we are going to cut somewhere else. Okay, hard one, you have been peacefully sleeping these past few nights because the camaraderie of your new teammates has been kind of a nice distraction. You've been remembering the good times, but after your talk yesterday, you begin to remember

the past. You begin to reflect on the past and you find yourself back three years ago. You are in the floating city of Gladehome, the capital of the astral alliance. You are in the office of Alonus, the archmage and leader of the council. The room has an entire wall of glass that looks out into the multiverse. You can see clittering stars and streaks of silver on a purple sky, as well as far off multi-colored planar pools. You see the wizard stands looking out this room-length window. She wears a crisp purple

uniform somewhere between a wizard's robe and adventurers gear. She's got goggles that hold back black hair with gray streaks and she looks out at the sky and puffs on a long pipe as you enter and close the door behind you. Without turning around she goes. I heard you requested teleportation back to the material plane. Yeah, I think it's time. Well, I won't stop you. I don't know how much this means to you now, but the battle was one in the end, and Grumsch will not conquer Isgard at least for now. Moon Shining Beverly are deployed there for the time being, they'll chase off the last of his invaders. They can finish the job.

There's a long moment where she's just looking out at the sky here, and she turns around and looks at you and goes, can I ask you a direct question, hard one? I wouldn't expect anything less. Does it intimidate you that their powers prevent them from aging? Intimidate. No, but I think I'm coming to understand the reality that they're going to stay as strong and heroic as we all once were, and I'm going to fade away. You see Alonus shakes her head and looks out the window again and goes no there are those among us who will remain ageless, there are those among us who will live hundreds

of years longer than the rest of us. You and I could stay here and glide home on the astral plane, stop, planes walking, and we'd live for centuries, but we would still die. Moonshine and Beverly are going to die. As long as there is violence in the multiverse, as long as there is random chance, we will all go eventually. There is no perfect timeline. That's true, but on that battlefield, maybe we won, but I lost everything. And I can't be here. I can't be responsible for something like that happening to Beverly, to Moonshine, I won't.

I wouldn't be able to bear it. Zemio. I'm sorry for what happened to you. We will be here when you're ready to come back. Thank you for that. I think my time as a hero may be over, but I'm glad to know I still have friends here in Glade Home. Hmm.

If you have friends in Glade Home, then you have not lost everything yet. There are still people out there who need you. Hard one sure fun. Hard one. You are awakened by a jolt as the bed disappears beneath you along with the Liamone's tiny duck. Saul, you are awakened as you go crashing into the ground. You guys see you are on an empty patch of mountain,

cold air blowing. It is just before sunrise. You can see streaks of sun breaking over the mountain, but it is only about dawn, your whole campsite, gone. Whoa, what happened to the spell, Kelly? Kelly? Kelly? Was it something I said? Foster. What happened to the spell? Callie? Callie? Callie? Callie? Was it something I said? Foster. Yeah, you see you see Foster has flopped down and it's just waving his wings around.

I go to the duck. No, no, no, no, no, no, where is Callie? You see Foster starts flapping around, looking around. Go ahead. You guys do see some tracks nearby. Go ahead and give me a survival check. Okay. 16. Okay, 11, yeah. Okay, hard one. You once all jump into action.

You guys see Kalle's footsteps exiting the hut and walking down the mountain a little bit and joining other footsteps. They you recognize to be no pause and some kind of vehicle or automaton with treads. Can I look into my mountain? Can I look into my cloak and see if the little devices there? Device is gone, gone.

Okay, great. So what this is. I think we can piece this together pretty quickly. Okay, let's get a move on. No breakfast today. I mean, I got some hot bowl of eggs if you want one. I'll take a walking egg, sure. Sure. Yeah, you pop the egg without breaking the shell off. A lot of crunch in there.

We're going to need the protein. Very nice. Okay. Yeah, we just like instantly. Very little words between us, I think. Yeah, you guys rush after the tracks, hopping down the mountain, just covering a dozen feet at once,

just kind of charging recklessly. And you guys see in a stretch of valley below you, heading northwest in kind of the wrong direction, is a pack of nobles following an automaton. The automaton is made of patchwork parts. You see, you know, new steel, but also rusty iron, bronze. It's eyes are glowing, blue spheres,

and it has a big metal carapace that looks like it could hide some kind of weapons, and you see it's got arms that also appear to have like, side to ends. And the Noles all jog in perfect lock step, which is very unusual. They seem like very kind of militarized. And you see that they all have these clockwork leeches in the back of their head and going into their spine. And you see amongst the nobles, Cali is jogging along with them in perfect lockstep.

Okay. She didn't enlist voluntarily, I don't think. No, she's not really a jogger, she's more of a sprinter. I see. Yeah, it looks like she's holding back actually. Yeah, Kelly, I'll say as you're running along, you look around at the, or you, you don't super have control of your body. You do feel that this leech is embedding itself in you and right now it can control essentially like your nerves and stuff so it's activating your muscles and making you go and follow along with this automaton that is basically like sending out signals and like simple commands.

So like my body is doing the work but my mind is still free. Correct. But I do feel you see. This is a horror movie. As you see the noils around you though, you see that their leeches are embedded deeper and looks like it has killed them. And these noils are fully controlled.

And you feel your life force being sapped away. You start to feel yourself fading a little bit. But right now, you are conscious of what's going on. Okay. Can I make like there's a lot of self-flagulation for myself right now, getting whipped up in stupid spring sentimentality when I'm supposed to be frozen of mind. So can I still that self-flagulation and just try to do a crude assessment of the situation if there's anything I can do with my brain to

interact with this? Yeah go ahead and give me an inside check. 15. 15. As you let the wintery calm take over yourself and you almost you you feel your body begin to cool down from the the hot sweats that you're breaking as you're jogging along with these noles. And you're able to kind of think of this logically. You look around, you know that the hut was going to break basically as soon as you get out of reach of it. You think it's possible that hard one and Saul

might be able to get the jump on these guys. You know that you're having to follow orders right now, like as soon as you get the signal to get in lock step with these guys, you feel your body compelled to do it, but your mind is not completely gone You think you might be able to resist part of it, but I think the overwhelming thing is sort of the logical thought that okay Hard one and Saul will come soon

Best bet is for them to knock this thing out of my head. I've not been completely taken over yet Once they get this thing out. I can join the battlefield. Once I join the battlefield, they're toast. Alright, I once again stifled a self-flagulation of letting myself be saved again. And I think I just, yeah, the patience of a frozen lake. Yeah, Kali marches along, hard one and saw what are you guys going to do to approach. Alright, so we're seeing them ahead of us. Are we like higher up to have a vantage at all? You do not have any kind of advantage on them. They're just in the distance.

If you guys would like to stealth, you can do a role for it. They're on active patrol. Mm-hmm. Okay. I think I think we try to flank them and we do a smashing grab. We get Callie, get this thing, offer Neck, and then we can take them out. Yeah. Certical extraction. Yeah. Okay. So let's sneak run. All right. Great. Okay. Yeah, you see kind of the direction that they're going and you guys climb and try to essentially cut them off. Go ahead and give me stealth checks. 19. 13.

Okay. This main automaton is doing the thinking for the whole party. Okay. So it will just be this automaton doing the perception check. I'll roll it in front of the table as a plus five to perception. Oh, boy. That's a 16. Plan B, frog. Can you cause a distraction? This automaton doing the perception check. I'll roll in front of the table as a plus five to perception. Oh boy That's a 16 plan B frog. Can you cause a distraction big time? Sweet so um, yep, so you make a little noise on the rock as you

Hopped down try to get a vantage point on the approaching guys. You see the automaton looks up and goes Potential ally detected. Give me back my friend. Go ahead and roll initiative. Okay. 17. 19. 24. Nice.

I will say Cali, you're at about half health. Just from the... Oh, from the leg, yeah, yeah. Cali, you... Round up. Round up, short. So sad. So sad.

Round up to three-quarter self. Kelly, you are first to act. You get an order from the automaton. Subdu, potential ally. Subdu. And it is going to command you to attack Saul, use your highest level spells to smite. What? Oh, Oh. Oh. Oh. How do you know I'm a fucking paladin? The worm knows all. You are in the network now. Do I use all through my attacks, my offerings? Currants.

Oh my god. Cali. Disadvantaged. Yeah. Oh, I disadvantaged. So, the first one, a 15 to hit. That one is? Yeah.

Salt dives out of the way as Callie robotically swings at him. 18 is the next one. Mrs. as well. Off hands. 18 with the next one. Mrs. three times, yes. Callie, hey. Good job, Callie.

I knew you couldn't hit me. Yeah, you see Callie with a glaze looking her eyes with a clockwork leech in the back of her head is lacking the usual passion she has for fighting and just goes up into three very forward jabs. Yeah. You see like a twitch of me like cheering and enjoying that I miss.

Yes, yes. No, no fight for the network. Hit instead this time. That's not what the network is. I'm gonna show you the network. It's all that is your turn. Okay, I know that hard one is still hidden. I also know that he's a better wrestler than me,

so I'm gonna let him subdue Calli. I am going to turn my face towards all of these nolls and this robot. You see this anger starts building on it. It turns bioluminescent so much so that you can see my skull underneath, and I'm going to use a new ability for my new subclass called Hour of Reaping. Lots. Each creature within 30 feet makes a wisdom save on fail. They're frightened

until the end of the next turn. Oh no. Does that mean as well? That is you as well, yes. 21. Okay, okay. The automaton is immune to being frightened and so are the noils. Oh! So it's kind of brutal. Yeah, it's weird. It is these unfailing machines. Just kind of look at you.

Unusual. So my face looks like the aliens from they live now. Objectively frightening. Oh. I analyze this to be frightening. Hardwood is a little shook. Do you have notes? Weird frog.

Yes, you shown where our leeches should eat. I hate this. Yeah, that's my turn. Brutal. Jeez. OK, hard one that is your turn. You see the automatons and the people who are brainwashed by the automatonc are marching towards Saul.

Now you can see his skeleton kind of Look at that thick choosy brainstem god. I just want to eat it. Yes, aren't you distracted by my brainstem? Kind of yes. Interesting move. I don't hit it. Ken Hardware just run out of cover and spear tackle, Callie. You can, yeah. Yeah, I just want to try to grapple her away from the group. Great. Callie, go ahead and give me an opposed athletics check.

Oh, the best thing is coming off to play. Callie looked sad that she rolled well, I think. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope I think. Nope. And A. Whoa. Great. I got a swim. I got a 26.

Yes. Hard one tackles her frighteningly heart. Do you? It didn't mean to lead with the head. Yeah, she's standing super rigidly because the leech of just starting to take her over. I slipped on a pebble, OK? So you have successfully grappled Callie.

Now can I action surge to try to remove the leech? You can, go ahead and try to remove the leech. The leech is going to do a con saving throw to hang on and that will be your contested strength check to try to pull it off. Okay, strength check. So this thing gets a plus three to con. I'll roll in front of the table.

Oh, the table. The table. That's a nat 20, so that's 23. So we'll still say 23. Okay, just a plain old strength check. So this is a strength check. It's non athletics. That's a 10, a 15.

I might as well use a luck point. Okay, yes. Oh. And it's a 20. Ah! Oh no, sorry, not a 9. Oh my god. 30, 30.

Yes, celebrate for the network. If you get stuck into work, I'm getting confused. Yeah, hard one. You start to pull at it and you realize this is a little complicated and you could potentially hurt Callie if you don't do this correct. So I think you're more than my tackle. Yeah, I think you start, I think you start hesitating a little bit as you wrestle with

her. Alright, everyone's jealous of my friend's beautiful mind. They just want to take it over all the time. Another potential ally detected. The other button turns a little bit to the hard one. Not me. I'll show you my skeleton too. No, we want this guy's brain to focus up on him.

I appreciate the compliments, I guess. The no pack is going to rush over and take some cracks at Saul. Okay, they were with disadvantage, you still have not been hit that turn, but unfortunately on the low one, would have gotten that 20 does not. That is a 22 to hit though. Okay. Uh, 24 damage, Saul.

As they flank you, get around you, and hard one, you've seen Noel's fight before, and a lot of them fight in this like very bloodthirsty way. And you see much like Callie, they're just surrounding him, and just jabbing at him emotionally. Um, what was the lower hit? 22. Okay, I'm going to use silvery barbs on that. All right, you see my tongue darts out, grabs one of the Noel's hands, What was the lower hit? 22. Okay, I'm going to use silvery barbs on that.

All right, you see my tongue darts out, grabs one of the nose hands and makes it stab into one of the other nose. And then I retract my tongue and then I shoot this like star light energy at hard one to give him a advantage on his next attack. Whoa! Sick.

Silvery barbs, they have to reroll, right? Yes. Okay. Shout out to the two crew. Yeah. No damage, hard one, you are gonna get advantage now. Yeah, you see this sparkle of energy around you. Great.

Another disadvantage attack on Salda. You only get one more attack this warm. Okay, lower one is only a 10, misses. Yeah, the place one is so good, I love it. Yeah, they're just jabbing at you and you're literally just jumping on their swords. Yip, yip, yip, yip. That is right.

Oh no, they're horny and under control. That is the automaton's turn. You see that the automaton at the start of its turn opens up. It's like chest carapace and you see another one of these leeches pops out and slides down its body and disappears into the dirt. Oh, well. Burrows down and then it's going to take its turn. You see the automaton is going to go over and take some swipes at hard one while he wrestles

with Kali. Stop attacking our cool new ally. She's my friend first. She's my friend better now. I don't think so, you put a warbiner, bruh. I have better friends now. Hey, we keep losing our friends, you can't take any more. We are at a bare minimum of friends.

I got an 11 to hit on my first attack. That's bad. I got a 22 to hit on my second attack. That's pretty good. That's good, you know what I'm saying. All right, that is 14 damage hard one. Okay. 22 to hit on my second attack. That's pretty good. That's good. Yeah, all right. That is 14 damage hard one. Okay.

And after the automaton that's back up to Cali's turn. Okay, try to actually hit this time, please. Okay. Do it for our creator. Okay, spell out exactly what I have to do. Please use your highest level spell slot and stab into the guy who is trying to pull out your worm. Draw, give me your cloak quick.

All three attacks. All three, please. What'd you do? I caught a cock. Uh, did you do? Uh, yes. Good job team. We did it.

Bye. He did it everyone. Oh my God. Oh my God. Stop celebrating. Stop celebrating. Wait, can I use, okay, would you let me use my luck played reroll? Okay.

You can call on its luck, no action required. To reroll, one attack, roll, ability check, or saving throw, you dislike. You must use the second roll. Okay, here is what I will say, Callie. We're gonna treat this like disobeying chaos, and you're gonna take five D10 psychic damages. You wanna reroll this? I'll take it.

Okay, no, five D10 psychic damage. I just saw Koota do this. I'm fucking inspired. Our nose is bleeding. I don't know if it's because of the dry mountain air if she's disobeying a spell. Could be both. I make the calculation that this is the right move. Yeah, as you make this winter eladren calculation and are able to use the power of the sword

knowing that since this thing has not fully taken you over yet, this would probably be the least affected thing in the most control you have in this moment. You're able to slightly redirect it so you don't stab hard one directly in the chest and you can reroll. But doing so does send shock waves through your brain for 29 damage. Okay. She's already at half. Yeah. Oh fuck. You guys see blood coming out of Cali's nose as the sword Resists a little bit going into you hard one doesn't look good. Go ahead and roll a new attack Cali That's insane. Did you just crit again? No? This is so bad. Please use your highest level. I can use a lock point

Right, I'm making an enemy reroll. Yes, can you yeah? So bad. Please use your highest level. I can use a luck point. Right? I'm gonna make an enemy reroll. Yes. Can you? Yeah, I think you can use an... Thank you. I think you can use an... I don't know that everyone's ever done this,

but this is a good time. Yeah. This is a good time, because try... Can you even be good? Cali can take me down. Yes, that's what I'm worried about. Yeah. You can spend one luck point

when an attack roll is made against you. Yeah! Oh! Okay. Please don't crit again. Yes, I did. Yes, did it. Yes, did it.

Did it. Oh my god, okay. Does a 18 hit. It does. Great. It does, okay. Congratulations. But just regular hit. Just regular hit. W a regular hit waste that just a fourth level smile. No big deal

I wrote pretty poorly so 28 damage okay, okay, the damage stabs into hard one first of starfire Oh go ahead and make your second and third attack, please okay good job Okay, that's gonna hit as well. Next, next. Highest level smile. Highest level smile, okay. This is really, really.

Hahaha. For making a fucking friend. Okay, that is 29 damage. Okay. Go ahead and make the bonus action attack. I take out coldest fucking ice blade make the bonus action attack. I take out coldest fucking ice blade from my off hands attack. You don't have to do that.

Do I not have to do that? You do. This guy doesn't make the rules. The creator makes the rules. And as I see it come out, I'm just like cold, I need you to fucking into seed here. I just fucking crit again. Jesus Christ. You can use another luck point. I'm gonna take the damage. I want to save a luck point because I need to get the same offer. Do another full smite and double it. This is gonna be 10-D8. Okay, that could take me down. Yeah, I'll use a luck point.

Okay, that could take me down. Yeah, I'll use the luck point. It's still gonna hit. Damn. God fucking damn it. Why? This is incredible. You've never rolled so well. I also like as a paladin. I feel like it's so rare to fucking- I've- Oh my god. You're pretty so much. It's so cool. Hey, guys, you've been doing great, but when it rains it pours. We did really good in one tunnel man. Oh my god 28 more damage. Okay hard one is so fucked up. Okay, try not to you're not down not down

Okay, but I have used all of the luck points, right? Because I used one used one earlier Oh, and then I used one on her other crit. Yeah, and then again, alright sweet. So the good God Okay, that is Callie's sweet. So they're good. God. Okay, that is Callie's turn, Saul that's your turn. I'm good, I'm good. Are you sure, man? I'm good. I turned to this Anabotan and I say,

hey, I'm pretty new to making friends, but I'm pretty sure this isn't how you do it. This is how you make friends, the worm introduces you, and then you become friends. Worms are rarely involved I am not the boss the creator is the boss is creator you keep talking great creator makes everything Everything will come together with worms You're kind of a loser me. Yeah, I bring the worms to

I bring the worms to one thing or another and one thing or another gets warmed and joins me We go back to the creator. You're not the friend. You're just the dealer. You're just the worm guy Exactly. Thank you. What's the creator's name the creator? I see My beat. Oh, yeah, Saul thinks about be Alex and right and just wonders for a second. Shakes that out of his head, I guess Harbohen's gonna have advantage on trying to get this off of Callie. I guess I'll just try and attack this automaton. It seems like they're in charge. Try and distract them at the very least.

You are surrounded by nobles, so you will have to take an opportunity to attack. Shit. Just the one though, and it is with disadvantage. All right, yeah, yeah, I can do that. Great, yeah, we're treating them as a swarm, so they hit big, but they only attack a couple times Shout out to the two grown up okay, right jump up

Yeah, you pop up on their swords as they go after you and you pop up Yeah, and the auto-a-ton is just like rolling over towards hard one time for me to make more friends with worms When being so proud of this I'm gonna take to a tax great That's two fours. Wow. We're all so proud of this. I'm gonna take to a tax. Great. That's two fours. Wow, we're all making great rolls. This is scoff rice. That's gonna be a 13 total.

Okay, that does not hit. It bounces off the metal carapace. Can I take a bonus action for your blows if I don't hit? Yes, of course. I'm gonna do that then. Great, two more attacks. Stop scuffing up my scrap metal carapace. I need to look like a proud worm, guys.

Listen, it's scuffed to begin with. We've all been bearing our chest recently, but worms aren't supposed to come out when you do it. You don't know that. There we go. Okay, so that's going to be a 23 and a 26. Both hit. All right, cool.

Look. That's 10 damage. Okay. Um, that's 10 damage. Okay. You, you, you pop this automaton and this dude is fierce in that he's able to, you know, command these little legions of guys, but you see, yeah, you, you dent him as you get up. Okay. A couple of pops. This guy is no ancient dragon. Yeah, you can see the bioluminescence flashes on my fist and you do see my bones break a little bit inside

Yeah, I think the toughest thing on this battlefield is Cali The power of friendship is For worms, I think your friends with the worms. That's who your friends are I also friends with the worms. We are all worms At the end of your turn go ahead and give me a perception check, Saul. Oh shit. Oh. 12.

Okay. Nothing happens. Okay. After. All right. Saul's turn. That is hard one's turn. You are wrestling with Cali.

Yeah. Get him, new friend. Give me this worm. All right, so I'm going to try to rip this slug. Great. We're doing it against the con save. Plus three to this roll on the front of the table. Last time, I got a crit.

I got a hit. I was running. We'll try not to get a natton. Too many bad crit. I would like to crit. Okay. 13. Okay, that's just a 13.

Strength check. You're doing strength check. 17. Okay, that's just a 13. Strength check, you're doing strength check. 17. Okay, go, go. We'll wrestling with Kali before she had gotten her sword out and was stabbing at you and stuff, and you weren't able to get like a good grip on it, but you finally get it and you detach it

from the back of her head here. And Kali, you feel the release of this influence and immediately feel control come back. But you feel, it feels weird. It feels like you've been like sleeping on your arms or something like everything feels like it's fallen asleep. You kind of like collapse a little bit, but you are back. My relief is immediately stung by seeing

the fucking massacre of hard one. Yeah, you stabbed me a bunch. What did I do? You stabbed me in the chest, the arms, you hit me with your sword, then you hit me with a freezing cold eye stagger thing. I'm so sorry. It's all good. I think it was the worm. It was the worm. We're being proud of it. Yes, long as we're not. We're good. Are we good?

Yes. You're I'm the one who fucking absolutely fucked up. You're the one who should be living with me. Take a swing at me, please. I don't think anyone needs to hit anyone else anymore. Hard one bonus action, hugs Callie. He uses that as a second. Pause it, please. I want it to punish me. The hugs are a little too please. I want it to punish me. He looks real little too old.

I forgive you. That is the null packs turn. null pack is going to, I guess go after hard one because he's that saw is pretty hard to hit. God, that's a 10 to hit on the first attack. And a nat one, Mrs. Nice. This is full time. Just yep, one, Mrs. Nice. This is full time.

Just, yep, yep, yep. Okay, guys, with more feeling, please. Then the automaton is going to open up its chest carapace, and you see it begins glowing, and the automaton goes, no time for worm strategy, must contain powerful potential allies. Hard one go ahead and give me a charisma saving throw.

Oh, charisma save. Whoa. No. I think it's a friendship beam. 16. 16 passes. Yes. Oh, thank you.

Hard one, you resist. You feel yourself drawn into the thing's carapace. for a second you find yourself in a strange prison like a force cage and then You appear back on the battlefield you resist at your good. All right. You know what birds do birds eat worms Are you a bird with the crow bros? Are you a bird? We're the crow bros. The crow what? That's right. You look like you've killed a crow.

You can't pull a clock off from inside my shirt. Wow. Wow. After the automaton, that is Callie's turn. Callie you're back on the battle. Nice. Okay, I've got to do a quick battle assessment and focus on what is the most threatening thing right now.

The automaton. Okay. And that's the most threatening thing right now. The automaton. Okay. And that's like in the center right now. Yeah. Alright. I'm just gonna try and go after that. Great. Okay.

Wait, old friend. Get in here early. We were worm buddies. You were co-wormers. Alright. I'm gonna just take my free attacks. I don't have the smites that I used to, but oh, does this 16 hit. 16 does hit.

Yes! Whoa, thank God. Thin metal. Great, I'm going to the level smite. Nice. You know what, I'm gonna fucking roll these in my fucking hands. Yeah, yeah, because we're all really well.

We're rolling really well, or really bad, depending on who side you're on They think on how much you like worms If you like worms, we're rolling good The only worms I want to eat are the ones I put in the chili last night what You're the bird thing going on that you'd like it just you be clear. Are you bird? No, we just like bird. I'm not programmed to know what a bird is. That's very specific.

All I see are friends. I rolled better with my with my tactile though. Nice. Yes, okay, so that is going to be 38 damage. Yes. Okay, yeah, this automaton instantly looks hooked up. You see just a bunch of metal pieces blow off in all directions.

This, going to be insight checks, guys. Three, okay, 10. 16. Okay, no. Callie, I think you clock as you hit this thing and a bunch of its pieces blow off. And just the way this thing looks, it was designed to do these very nefarious things,

but it is not being done in any kind of professional capacity, and this thing is starting to fall apart as soon as it's not doing its primary function. You get the sense that this probably isn't actually mothership. Huh? Who else is fucking tinkering with magical objects? Well, I've got two more attacks, so I'm gonna fucking use it. Yeah. Does a 15 hit? 15 does hit. Wow.

That's okay. Amazing. Things made from like a Honda fit. Well, he just is a big metal guy. All right, I can only do a second level smite. Okay. 28 more damage, and I'm going to add to that a Flourish for another six. Okay, Kelly finish this on God, I think I I don't know it's over and I take another attack with coldest stagga

That I'm really good I'm already This one just stabbing back and forth I already Just stabbing back and forth bring me back to the world Your worm food really be with my berms And then I want to go after all these stupid little Neck things on the nobles. Yeah, I don't know

Yeah, you see as soon as the automaton drops you see the nolls all stop fighting. Oh. Look at you guys, and prepare to just start marching in the other direction. I think I go, truth, this never happens. Yep, yep, yep, and they just start running off. Did they get a signal from somewhere else? So they weren't being controlled by this one. There's a bigger signal. They might be going back to the creator. We should follow them.

Yeah, we really should. I'm super fucked up. Oh yeah. And I've spent a lot of spells. Yeah. Speaking of which, I guess, can I lay on hands? Oh yeah. Yeah.

I'm really, really, really, really sorry. It's all right. It's all right. I know it wasn't you. No, it was me though. It really was me. Yeah, well it was your sword and... But it's also like the whole reason that we're fucking in this to begin with is because I've just been... I got, I got really swept up

in the moment and I compromised the mission and I'm really, really sorry. And I think, God, I just always do this. Hey, it's like I'm always just daydreamin' Stargaze and making up stupid little games and who puts the bill for all my little flights of fancy? Well, everyone around me and fucking call the now hard one. Saul grabs Kalle's hand, says,

Hey, the reason that people are always trying to take over and manipulate you, is because you're the strongest of us. We just need to be better about watching each other's backs. That's very, very sweet, Saul, but I will take responsibility and admit that I'm too impressionable. We all brought that worm into the hut. It chose you, sure, but it could have been any of us. Yeah, but I should have, I mean, making silly little duck huts for us to just like play games in. I mean, that's, it's all too romantic and I have to really really really shave the fucking frill off my edges.

I I wish it wouldn't I like the frill. That's what makes Cali Cali. I Appreciate that, but I think if we're gonna get colder back, Cali needs to change. And anyways, I guess I also really owe you an apology hard one because... I'm so stupid in juvenile, I just thought like, oh he doesn't want to fight Ultras with us because he doesn't like us, how miserable, like...

And now I realize you don't want to fight Ultras with us because... You know that, however we bring into that battle, I'll just get them fucking killed or fucking stuck in a helmet. I understand my track record is not desirable. Anyways, I'm really sorry. We lost some ground tonight. I might suggest that we rest it off, but I promise I'm not gonna conjure silly spells and ducks we can sleep in will make a normal, austere camp, like reasonable people. Does that sound okay?

No, but that's what you need then, yeah. I think in my weakened state, I'll just be more of a fucking liability if we keep going. Let's set up camp then, and let's get some rest. Yeah. Okay. Can I do a Liam and Tiny Hut, but it's like a bare-bones fucking camp with like three thin sleeping bags in it. You make a really thin, really hot, to rest up in. sleeping bags in it.

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and brother is forced to kick brother, make sure you are wearing bird dogs. To get yours and a free Yeti-style tumbler, go to bird dogs. me, go team pants, and enjoy the show. Before we go in, can I do a perception check for this other worm that went into the ground? This, you can. Is that one? Okay. I'm gonna give him the help action on that.

I feel like we're all looking for him. I mean, if he pointed out, can we all just look for it? Yeah, here's how we do it. Shout out to the two crew. Okay. 19. There you go. I got an 11.

Uh, Kali, you see it. You can still smell it's metal. I'll find it. You see it on the back of Saul's neck, siphoning. Oh! Can I rip it off? I made him! Ah!

Ah! I'm hit! Please, is shit! I'll break it over my knee! Who invited you? No one. It's still there. It feels like it's still there.

Do I have one fuck? Do I have one? I'm looking at the back of the horse neck. I'm looking at the back of the horse neck. Look at the beard. There's no worm in the beard. But Saul, you did take 20 damage from being leached over the past. Look at you having fun. Oh! Over the past year.

You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun.

You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun.

You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. You haven't fun. I'm in my boner when I use clockwork leeches. It gets me off, guys. It gets me off. Yes, you are able to, this one is not nearly as embedded as the one on Cali.

You guys are able to rip it off and just stomping it into the ground. Yeah, we really fucking take turns on it. It's confetti when we're done with it. Great. And it's cathartic while we're doing it. It's confetti but we're done with it. Great. And it's cathartic while we're doing it. So you guys set up camp and I'm gonna say we're gonna set a base DC. We're not going to have you guys roll a con save because you guys haven't moved. So I'm going to set a low DC and see if the nobles, if they roll a one two a three or a four, they're on the wrong scent and see if the nobles, if they roll a one, two, a three, or a four, they're on the wrong

scent and going in the wrong direction. But five are higher. You guys get another loss. We have one loss. And you already have one. So this will be two. So I'm going to roll in front of the table. That's a nine. So they do succeed. They get a 12. So you guys do here as you guys patch up your wounds throughout the day and as nightfall hits you do here the howling of Noles as this trip has gotten a lot more And Cali do you want to describe the new bare bones? Yeah, I do okay. It's a fucking sad droopy tank with three thin sleeping bags inside and nothing else. Uh-huh. You see, yeah, you see Foster sitting there just kind of looking upset.

Where? There's a, there's a hawth and it's too cold to stop fire. Where? How, how is it mildewed already? Where? It's drafting here. Yeah, I think that there's like a layer of frost on everything. Like, even when we sleep, there's just like accumulates a layer of frost, even though

we're indoors. Yeah. Yeah. I think without the distractions of the duck tint and just like all of like the laughter and marimaking and wrestling, so I'll just like, go to sleep, thinking about how called her. With his good investigation, would have seen that worm a mile away. Ah. Yeah.

So I'll go to sleep. Callie's just quietly sitting there looking at the empty hearth. And a hard one, what are you doing? I guess I think I might approach Callie and sit down just quietly and sit with her for a little bit, not saying anything. And maybe just offer. I... The reason I don't want to face Ultras is... It's because I'm afraid. It's because I'm afraid I might lose.

It's not because I think you guys are a liability. I'm afraid that I'll get you hurt. I want... I quite literally just got you so hurt. Yeah, you kicked the shit out of me. Yeah. Like, what could you possibly do that would be worse than that? I kicked the shit out of you.

I sent my friend to a fucking helmet because I was hung up on my axe. Though it is a sweet comfort to think that you don't think I'm a liability, I think it's objectively, it's get an objectively true and that's fine. You know what? Because I'm trying to look at it practically and be like, I know that you're afraid, but I feel like you're terribly powerful. So I understand you don't wanna fight Ultras, but maybe I don't want to ask you to save me, but could you train me at least?

Maybe I don't want to ask you to save me, but could you train me? At least? I... I won't try to talk you out of feeling like everything's your fault, because... Hell, I feel like that myself. We can... we can share a can of beans and... What the hell could be your fault? Well, like literally... like like a hero of multiple planes. I was. I don't think that that sort of title you just lose. I won every battle but the last one. I think that's everyone's story though, isn't it? You haven't lost yet. Called her still. Alive. You can still save him.

And I will. I will train you. I know you don't own me that. Well, I don't even know how well I can train you. You did kick my ass. I wrestle, Kelly. I think I do want to kind of stop it though and be like, uh, forgive me, I'm like pretty unscored, but what is the battle that you lost?

I've never heard anything about that. Well, you know, Theala killed Palor. Yeah, I think I've had to have some of the drama between the gods. This drama has only gotten worse since then, Belor was resurrected, but his murder inspired others. The planes are full of god killers, gods invading each other's realms, trying to murder each other so they can steal divine hearts, so they can invade the material plane like the Allah.

We're doing our best to form Pax God, Grumpsch, invaded his garden. Courts all were my father, rest. I lost my battle with Grumpsch, and my best friend died that day. A man named Cobb. I'm so sorry. It is what it is. What was he like? He was funny.

I was he? He's a riot that guy. Do you remember any jokes he used to tell? They're all off the cuff. You do know that Cobb would always say to keep it light. You'd always tell him to keep it light. But since he's gone, it feels like the light went with him. I'm really sorry.

Is that why you stopped? I can't protect my best friend. Who can I? Did he ask you to protect him? Try to save me. He did save me. I couldn't return the favor. God, that is the worst feeling. I imagine you might be able to relate.

Yeah, I was trying not to make it about me, but I had a visceral gut-glenchuff, empathy, not sympathy. Can I just creep over for a hug? I am gonna be straight with you. I have no good advice for these feelings. I don't know. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I just hold up in my ship and eat beans for three years. I don't know if that worked very much either.

Yeah, that doesn't feel like facing it. I did hear something that if you feel something and you just let yourself feel it, like feelings can only stay around for so long. It's when we fight feelings can only stay around for so long. It's when we fight them that they stay around for so long. Hard one lets in this feeling of failure and loss and I think you've cried.

I think that I like make myself an icy surface for the tears to sort of awfully roll off. Lay out. Lay whatever is in that out. I think that's like a dove into the nose. Yeah, I'll say, Saul, you were probably mostly pretending to be asleep. We're done for the day and just went to sleep and are just staring upward, having heard every single word that was just uttering. So the crying didn't wake you up. I think I face away in my sleeping bag

and pretend to sleep the whole time, but then I make a little like solemn pact to myself that I will do whatever I can to keep Callie from fully submerging into this icy darkness. That I'll do what I can to keep her smiling. Hmm. And you guys all go off to bed for the night. That's like trans backed back.

That's nice. Kind of like a training Monday. Yeah. So one of the cops is not the news. So all gets up and makes pancakes for everyone and gives hard one a huge one with a smiley face. Actually, after our little connection last night, I'm like feeling a little warm, so the heart actually works this way. Oh, it's a friend.

It goes up. Pat, go under the weird sleeping bag. It's a real camping trip now. Would my knob be full jet stream, but... I had dine tablets. Yeah. So, yeah. Saul wakes up first, and as you guys come out of your trances,

you do see that Saul is really overcompensating with the breakfast. Makes smiley-faced pancakes. Today's a new day! I spin mine around, so it's frowning. I look at you like, what are you doing? We just talk about this, spin it back up, and then spin mine so it's frowning.

The sun is shining, they're infinite tomorrow. I used syrup to make a couple little tears coming out of the eyes. So it licks them off. That's all right. Okay, I dismiss our Mueger 10. It's so licks them off. That's a lot right. All right. All right. I dismiss our Mueger 10. Okay.

It's a new day. It's a new day. I think I also like, I take my stupid little berries out of my juniper twig. I take my stupid little winter plum blossoms off, and I'm all just barren twigs and eyes. All business. I'll collect them and put them away.

Let's fucking do this, right? Yeah. You're in full. Yeah. So we know that the knolls under control, the controlled knolls went in the opposite direction. And as much as I want to know what's going on with that, got to just keep on the path, huh?

Something's not right, but we have to get through these mountains. Yeah, I have a question. I'm like having a memory of Krugingen talking about there being factions in Ion Deep that were working with Esri. Didn't we learn stuff about like Kruegen knew something about? Yeah, there are pieces. Or I like sent him a postcard with who was working with someone. Yeah, the bronze beards had um, Gromdall bronze beard was getting a shipment of stuff from mothership. Yeah. And Kruegen was saying that Jane of bronze beard

is at odds with the rest of her family. And this seems like it could have been on the low end of trouble. It would just be stuff for them to smuggle and on the high end of trouble would it would be stuff for a clue. This doesn't seem low ends trouble. It doesn't seem like low ends trouble. But I'll say a hard one.

You know enough about the mountains here that you guys are about halfway to Iron Deep. And as you start getting closer to Iron Deep proper, there are outlaws from Iron Deep that live in the mountain. Sort of these warlords and whatnot. And I'll say if hard one conveys this to you guys, you guys imagine that the mercenaries that you ran into when you were in the living would might be those type of guys. People who aren't officially affiliated with Iron Deep, but have access to a lot

of the same technology and are able to, like, kind of amass weapons and things like that, have their own sort of wild west. I see. Aha. So this is maybe just, like, a flare up between outlaw warlord people. It could just be essentially a warlord mad scientist. Oh, huh. That's, uh, too adjective you don't normally see next to each other. So it's bad. It's bad news. I mean, just a mad scientist, a regular. There's no mad scientists that just, uh, you know, work in a lawful way.

Yeah. They're mad. But I will say that you saw the nobles, when I say wrong direction, I don't mean they were literally heading like, you know, Iron Deep's West, they weren't heading east, they were heading like Northwest. They're heading like out of the way of Iron Deep, but it could be on that side of the mountain where the warlords kind of are. Not the straight diagonal path.

Exactly. Yeah, all right. Great. Okay, what we thinkin'. I think the most direct path straight to iron D great. I love it straight direct. No frills. Yeah, I said that too fun. No frills Just no one small hiking song is all I'm thinking Three Lala tree Lala tree Lala Lala I'm thinking. Trilala, Trilala, Trilala, Trilala, Trilala, Trilala.

Or when you get flashbacks to Beverly. You cries again. On the path we go. You guys march along. Go ahead and this is a non-event day. This is, you guys are on day six, but only day five of actual hiking. So go ahead and give me a survival check. Can I give you a bow to it?

Please. That's gonna be a 26. 26, a much needed, nice day. Oh, thank you. It's all put on the stupidest hat. What a load off. Looks like we made the changes we need to make. Yeah, Foster puts on a similar hat to Saul, they matching hats. Try to get Kelly's attention. I don't think it's cute

and fun when people match hats. There's nothing about that that makes me think of Elzorn, Iggy and Ignis is really funny cute voice asking for a hat. I loved it. No, no, no, frosted over. All right then. It's good hat. Keeps the sun on your eyes. Yes, that's what I was working about. It's practical. I agree. It's mesh on the sides.

It's very nice, breathable. Yeah, keeps the hair on the heads. I made them for each of you. All of us. Interesting. I'll use it as a functional bag. I have a hat, but thank you. Great.

You guys are Marchalong. As you make camp for that night, you do another bare bones camp. I do, I do the bare bones, but with the addendums from my talk with hard one. Got it, great, okay. So not glamping, but high level camping. Yeah, that's nice. You guys make another campfire for the night, go ahead and give me con saving throw. That is only a 15 I'll use in Dominable and reroll.

Okay, just a 10 throw. That is a 14. Okay. I'm going to roll in front of the table. On an 11 or higher, you guys have a no problem. Uh oh. I don't feel a no problem because that seems like good practice. It's manageable.

That is a 12, becomes a 15. As you guys are camping that night, you hear the sounds of noles in the distance to the north of you, to the south of you, barking back and forth, getting closer, getting closer, and then it gets quiet. Waiting right outside of us. They're onto us. I think we have to take this problem ahead on.

I don't want to be dealing with noles for the rest of this journey. Okay. I say we kick the shit out of these noles, and then we try to haul us and get ahead of them. I think we try to make an example of these knolls. Yeah, let's do it. Can I kick off before I dismiss the Ostea 10? Can I kick it off with some prested digitation?

Because I can create orders. Okay. So if they're using scent, can I at least just start it by throwing a scent 10 feet away, that's our same scent. Yeah, go ahead and give me a deception check. Seventeen. Okay, I'll say that as you use the press of digitation to move your scent a little bit,

you do hear skittering and the nolls reveal their position. You see eyes light up, you see a swarm, and a swarm leader, like a bigger, burlier nole is just sniffing around and looking waiting for you guys to appear. So can I summon my serpent between my legs? Yeah. The serpent appears, starfire appears below,

Callie, and the serpent sort of rears up like a snake in bears its fangs. Alright. And I think I mean, let's just do a little bit of buffing. Yeah. Hard one. Your AC could be better. Good bit.

I'm going to hit you with shield of faith. Sick. Thank you. Hard one you briefly see Beverly's face. A shield overtakes you. Thank you. Hard one you briefly see Beverly's face. That's a shield overtakes you. Thank you. They're infinite tomorrow's. All right, everybody ready? Yeah. Yeah. Three, two, one. It disappears in a two full swing. Yeah.

Callie on the back of a serpent. It's a hard one that has his axe. Saul is turning bio luminescent. Oh, all back to back. Yes. Go ahead and roll initiative, let's do it. 21. 14. 27.

Nice. OK, so nobody is surprised, but they rolled worse than you guys. Saul, your first act assumes the thing goes. You see the nobles turn and look at you? WHAAAA! WHAAAA! WHAAAA! Took a night off from fucking, huh? You weren't the ones that were fucking. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. jump four feet into the air, inflate his fist, they fill with his bioluminescent light, and then I'm just trying to slam down this horde and attack. Sick. Yeah, bioluminescent arms come down

to start attacking the horde. I am way of the long death now, and I'm hoping that I can absorb some of the HP from his null thread. 21 and 25. Both hit, yeah. Saul lands in the middle of this null swarm and just pops four of them lightning Yeah, I'm going to try and loosen them up so they'll just leave us alone and go have sex

So that's two hits I'm going to take a bonus action to floor your blows great 14 and 15. 15 hits. That's 26 damage to these nolls. So you jumped out in the middle of these nolls, a bunch of few of them in the stomach, have them doubling over, turn around, and crack a couple of them in the face.

You have injured the swarm, but they are not halved yet. They'll start doing less damage once they're halved. But I'll say you take out one, there's eight of them here. Yeah, you punch one in the stomach, get a liver shot, you see doubles over. Ruh! Ruh! Ruh!

Don't make me think that. Wait a second. Ruh! This sounds like me. I'm doing that. This is what they do. Fucking hate dogs. I'm so proud of them.

Frogs and dogs. Hard one, that's your turn. OK, hard one, kisses, call cause corpse for good luck. I'm gonna go after the beefy n' ol' pack lord. That is a 22 and a 21 to hit hit Oh, cry like that 29 damage sick yeah, you fuck up this no pack lord great and all action surge on a Wow 30 30 yeah Natural 30 No, I wait I was joking 30? Uh, no, I, oh wait.

I was joking. I was just joking. It was only 28. Hold on, Jake, that's a 30-sided dice, man. Yeah. What are you doing, man? It's a 28 and a 21. Great, you both hit.

27. Hard one finished the pack, well. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, you do. When I see, after I've slashed into him the first time, I just grip a can of beans like it's brass knuckles. And I punch him in the jaw.

Yeah, you break his jaw with a can of beans. You see the pack lord falls over dead. I do, I hold up Jessica Simpson and do a cheering thing. She's in the audience. I have to be right. I grab the pack leader's head and I yell, is this your king? See the pack lord begins head and my yellow is this your king?

See the pack leader begins regenerating You do see that the swarm of nobles unlike the ones that were being controlled by the clockwork leeches These guys are gonna keep at it. They've got the taste of blood. They're still coming down Yeah, so that is end of hard one start holding the head saying is this your leader as the dogs just keep barking and So no so no he's not It's just a question hard one by killing their leader you've triggered an election Kelly that's your turn all right. Um how many are there? Um they're acting as a swarm acting okay So I'm just gonna take three attacks on the swarm. Great way. I have advantage because I'm using my

mounted combat feet for the first time. The serpent was up in attack pose and then fires forward with you on back as you're just jousting on the back of the serpent. And yeah, I think I am gonna like joust style and like use the serpent to then like get out of range after my attacks. So that, so that like I keep the concentration on the shield of the face.

All right. This is freaking drag. That's a crit. Yeah! Finally on the right side. Finally! So many crit for you today. Oh my god.

I think your dice knew that those other crit didn't count. No, I think my dice were leading me towards feeling so monumentally terrible to have that. Okay, so my sword and now I'm gonna roll the third level is gonna be four. So it's gonna be 88, right? Correct. 41 damage. Wow, okay.

You guys see that as Kelly rides by on this serpent, streak of Starlight from her sword, cuts through half of the null pack that has been softened by Saul and keeps riding along. They are going to do an opportunity. Oh, I still have two more attacks. God, my God, all right. Just go for it.

Okay, that's gonna hit 22. Yeah, that's some fun. I'm gonna do a second level smite. Okay. 10 damage on the attack and 14 on the smite. Okay, nice. They are looking fucked up. There's only a few left. Third attack. That's another crit. Yeah, just on the back of the serpent, just riding back and forth slashing into them She said she was a liability She's liable to kill a lot of nobles The smite damage on that is 29

Kali finished this Um, I think I'm fucking ice cold no fucking. No frills. I look like a fucking butcher. Jesus! Callie goes through and just coldly cuts down the noles that are fighting with her. You see in one swift movement, cleans the blood off her sword, flips it around, puts it back in the sheath, and rides back up to you guys on the back of the serpent. That's one problem taken care of.

Let's get some rest. Tidally so. Yeah. Sweet. All right. So yeah, you guys do hear more noles in the distance, but they are far enough away that you can kind of calculate and deduce that they're not going to make it to you for the rest of the night so you can finish your rest.

Okay. Let's just go ahead and take the corpses and drag them along to create a ring of blood so that they know not to leave us alone. That's a really, really good idea. Yeah, I got it from you. I bring the Null Leader's head and I say, do you want to do this with the chili? Mmm, dog meat. I mean, they were gonna be us. Yeah, I'll do it.

I need my strength. Okay, you guys eat no oil for dinner? Yeah, I think that there's some little, like, I think that this victory now in this austere tent, there's some little metal silverware and camping utensils. Oh! All right. Yeah, you guys have upgraded a little bit.

Do we have those like ceramic mugs now? Not yet. No, you're getting there. We're starting Not yet. No, you're getting there. You're getting there. You're getting there. You're getting there. Okay, so you guys have had one encounter with the noles. Next time you know, hard one that more will come and you only have to fail twice for

them to show up. And things will just continue to double and triple and quadruple. You guys do get a night of sleep, however, and you wake up the next day. A little bit foggier today, and you see that your camp is surrounded by dead notes. I take in the smell of death. God, it smells so bad. Just absolute harmonica with a coffee. What are you drinking that from? I cut my hands. This is burning. Oh, ew. It's worth it though.

Yeah, like we've done all we can here. I think we have to push today, don't we? Let's push, push. Yeah, let's push. Okay. This is going to sound a little weird, but should we bring some of the pissed soaked tunics and rags from the noles to help as a scent distractor? Yeah, I think that's a really great item.

Okay, hard one, do you want to hold these? I was going to nominate you. I can conjure an unseen serpent to carry that along behind us. Yeah, the unseen serpent carries them along. Yeah, they can be 60 feet behind us. Great, perfect. Downwind, hopefully. Yeah.

The wind shifts in the other direction. Yeah, they can be 60 feet behind us. That's great. Perfect. Downwind hopefully. Yeah. The wind shifts in the other direction. The hot, smell piss. Go ahead of us. Go ahead of us. Seems like each knoll was marking their territory at all times. Like nobody ever let their bladder build up.

They just pissed whenever they had the slightest inkling. Whenever they could, really. I do have to claim your own clothing. Why is the sun beating down on it, too? It's so hot, it's the hottest day. It's hot, it's crazy. Yeah, the fog cleared so quick. Yeah.

That must be what the fog is. Yeah. It's fucking evaporating, no pace. Yeah. So you guys continue. You continue your hike and you find yourselves at the base of a giant cliff. And a hard one you know geographically where you guys are at is this is the big sort of

range of mountains that you have to climb to get over, that then you get into a new valley, and that's kind of where a lot of the warlords and stuff start popping up. But this is a big climb that you guys have to do. There are basically three checkpoints and depending on how you guys do on the climb, that will be how many setbacks you accumulate and how quickly monsters can catch up to you guys. So we will go ahead and do roles to see how many feet up each of the checkpoints are

to see how tall the cliff is. Okay. So we're gonna do a DC 10 plus a D8. Does someone wanna roll that for me? No. Please. No. Yeah, you guys have to roll it.

These are my D8's rolled really well. Yeah, why don't we have hard one roll? Okay, so this first checkpoint, D8. Six. Okay, so that's a Dc 16. Let's roll another D8 for the second checkpoint to the midpoint. Seven. Okay, Dc17 and then the last climb to the top. Four. Four. Okay, looks like the hardest part is getting to the middle. Starting your climb is a DC-6.

Oh yeah, we gotta pick the nose. See, it jets out. Hit you both with like a stunned look of like we've got this. It's really stern and no frills. And it's a part of the inspiration. Not even a smirk. You see how uncomfortable Cali is with being super straightforward. You, hard one. You see how uncomfortable Calli is with being super straightforward.

You, hard one. You've got this. Sorry, that was too animated. Um, you've got this. Thanks. So, yeah. You've got this. So all Flash is like a massive smile to try and cheer Calli up,

but he can't think of anything to say. So he's just like grinning at her and looking get-eyed. Ha ha ha ha. So all flashes you the shark eyes. It's kind of worse. It's kind of charming. Alright, yeah. It's got climbing to do. It's a climbing.

Yeah, it's a really handsome. So it just looks like a daytime talk show host. Dead eyes. Dead eyes. Dead eyes. The smile. Here's the forecast. It's rocks. Dead eyes and the only one. Here's the forecast.

It's rocks. So in what order do you guys want to go up? We'll do the initiative in that order. You guys can choose. I'm not much for climbing. I'm better at avoiding rocks as they fall. I'm good at climbing. I'm good at climbing.

So maybe you and I, I caboose, I saws in the middle. So you can either pull them up right and catch them. I love it. So maybe you and I, you lead, I, I caboose, solves in the middle. Yeah. So you can either pull them up or I can catch them. I love it. Okay, great. Kali, you are first to go. So this is how Kali starts her climb. That is a 14.

14. You see, Kali is struggling to get up. The climb is taking her a long time. It's fine. This is what learning is. I should have said before we started, Kelly, you got this. Do I get a bardic inspiration from the hard one? AKA bard one? Yeah, you see that you see that bard one also has dead eyes.

You really got a clean fulster off your hands, man. I do have like a face that prepared if like things get bad. Yeah, okay, Cali, you are going to take some minimal damage. I can take that. Okay, you're gonna take 10 damage just from sliding a little bit. This first kind of cliff face is pretty sheer and you're having a hard time getting grips

and you keep sliding down. I got a really nice rocks fall on my face, and I just, I love being humbled. Yeah. So you guys can proceed in line with Saul Nex, or you can have Callie try again. Can I give Callie guidance for her next drawing? You can. Great.

I grin really wide at Callie and say, learning is your mind's rainbow. Logically, I, the player know we should send up one of you guys with a bardic, but let's go with this. Yeah, great. Yeah. 20 full. Okay, nice.

Callie begins her climb successfully finally. You see that her hands are like bleeding a little bit from trying to get good grips and slipping a little bit, but does manage to make it to the first checkpoint. Hardware nods thinking that it was his you got this. Not at a spell. Saul, that is your turn. Saul, Grins is teeth wide.

It's going to start climbing. It's just day 14. You have the bardic though, right? Oh, yeah, I have a bardic. You can use that. That's an eight. You get up on the first checkpoint with Callie. And it was the you got this that really pushed you through.

That got for you for real. You've taken on the morning news anchor. You are the weatherman. It's a great nickname. You have a weatherman. And that is. He. You have a weatherman. The weatherman. And that is- He always knows what's gonna happen. He always knows what's coming.

Alright. That is a 21. Hard one you successfully get up to the first checkpoint. Are we tired? Do we have ropes on us? You can? You can tie ropes to you guys. Yeah, let's all tie.

Throw up. Yeah, okay, throw up. Yeah, you guys all start your climbs Separate when it's not too dangerous, but once you get going and once you get up to this first checkpoint And at this point you guys are 116 feet up But if you fall from higher up, you'll fall to this point probably unless you real terrible terrible terrible Okay, but you guys rope off what that means is if somebody falls off They will potentially pull someone off But it means that they don't necessarily they don't free fall right?

Yeah, so you're putting the party at higher risk to save each other great love that what do you think is at the top of this hill by the way? Oh, yeah, I I would know yeah You would think more mountains and potentially warlords and potentially Some kind of mad scientists apparently. Okay, I'm trying to figure out if I should give another bardic to Saul, I think I'm going to do it. There we go. Hey, you've got this.

Today's forecast calls for partly chance of Clouds followed by successful friendship. Sweet, go ahead and give me a new rules as you climb up. 22. Cal, you make it up to the halfway point, and the climb only gets easier from here. So you're up on a little ledge and I'll saw you up next. Okay, Saul is going to give a hard one guidance this time. Thank you.

But he says it in a little questioning way this time. He's like, you got this. Okay. 21. 21 does it? Yeah. You get up to the halfway point. Hard one.

You are the caboose. Yes. That's another 21. Okay. Yeah. You guys all make it up to the halfway point here. Should we have snacks? Yes, I think that sounds really good.

Sustinance, I mean. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. We're shins. I take out some M&M-less gorp. You see, Foster always loves the gorp and always goes straight for the M&M's and you see it goes into the pack and just looks disappointed and take some raisins. A lot of pecans in here. Yeah as you guys reach the midpoint

there is a sudden shake as gravel and rocks begin falling from above you and suddenly a giant crack appears in the middle of the mountain by sacking it and the two sides begin to move apart and open everybody give me dexterity saving. Oh good. 17. Dirty 20 pass. Matt won. Oh! You see, Cali was a little close to the edge. And as it shakes, she falls off, but you guys are tied off. Oh, gross. One of you can make a strength saving throw to try to grab her. I'm going to say it's going to be a little difficult

because she rolled a nat one. So let's say strength saving throw, DC 20, but one of you can help the other one. Okay. I got her. Not so fast. Okay, use this help. 21. Oh, hard one. you get over to the edge, you dig your heels in and you catch Callie as she's falling with the rope, hope it gets tight and Callie, you definitely are gonna take a little bit of damage. Back crack?

You take nice out of me. 13 damage as you're back cracks. All right, but you have to do me next. I could use that release. Saul kind of grabs hard ones, waste, and keeps him up there. Thanks, weatherman. And you guys take a little bit of time and pull Callie back up. But yeah, you feel.

I look so sheepish as I finally am revealed. Thank you for saving me, Ken. It's really raining Callie's out there, right, huh? Yeah. Weather jokes. I actually really like weather jokes. Stop you for saving me. Yeah. It's really raining. Callie's out there, right? Yeah. Weather jokes. I actually really like weather jokes. Stop it, stop it, stop it. And as you guys pull Callie up,

when the dust settles and the mountain stops shaking, you see that the rocks have separated with a vertical fissure in the middle about 20 feet wide. And guys, go ahead and give me perception checks. Matt, one. 21, 18. Okay, first off, you guys all feel through this crack in the mountain, heat wafting from inside,

blowing out of the mountain. And below you guys, you see three fire giants returning from the above world. You see they wear suits of black plate with fiery red hair that matches their cloaks, standing nearly 20 feet tall. On their backs are enormous great swords as tall is hard one and they are carrying with them a huge wagon full of scrap metal salvaged from destroyed automatons. Yeah, the same build as the automatons that you saw that had attacked you.

It looks like they went and destroyed some of them and they're taking them for themselves. Oh. Interesting. Huh. And you hear them talking kind of echoing through the valley, but they're speaking in giant and they Proceed into the fissure they've created in the rocks and as they disappear into the distance you feel the Mountain begins to shake and begins to close Should we jump in?

Wait, is that freaking crazy? Hard one like if we went this way, would it be faster? Stay put. Okay. That's an entrance to the fire giant's realm. We can't go there, we can't survive. Yeah, I have to take three showers a day just to maintain kind of my general moisture level. So like, that does not seem great for me. Yeah, it will dry out real fast, but...

I hold out my hand and it's melting. Yeah, you're right. Maybe I wouldn't be so copacetic with that. Sweet, yeah. You guys feel the rocks. I do. I do. I do.

I do. I do. I do. That breaks me. That breaks me. I've already been hit. Fuck. You feel the mountain shaking again

as the fissure once again closes, hiding away the fire giants underground city, underground layer. Callie and Saul, as the mountain closes, you've felt this heat, wafting towards you. In the middle of the overwhelming heat, you do feel a familiar icy breeze for a second.

And then it is cut off as the mountain closes. And that's where we'll end our session. Oh! That was... Pidipi? Wow. Hahaha. Wow, wow, wow. Well, we'll talk about this more over in our Patreon, patreon.com slash an ad pod that's any DPPOD,

don't say get it, don't do it. That was too early, even for the bit. That's it. Everyone relax, okay? All business, actually. Anyone have anything they'd like to plug? It's good to plug. I also have a really weird plug.

And we want to do it. Me and Merve got these day planners. That are pretty intensive, and I love them. It was like a little daily habit tracker. Yeah. So I just wanted to say, if you're thinking about getting into a day planner, it could be a really beautiful day. Yeah.

I've got day planners, everybody. I've got day planners. Day planners. Check planners everybody. Oh Dave planners. Check them out. I like that. Yeah, and with that I think we have nothing to plan officially. We got to the last day. Yeah, we did. Nothing else.

Yeah. Okay. You can follow us on social media that we may or may not use. AdCH MercedMe at called Disgaudable, AdEAge for Demole and AdCherc Gortsis Jake. And you can tweet about the show using hashtag NADPOD that's any DDPOD. Nope. We are we are the youth of the nation. We are we are the youth of the nation. Folks, the end of our show has come, and that means it's time to shout out our benevolent,

powerful council of elders. Let's get right to the task. Brad D. Jeffrey S. UC. Later Mick Skater. Matt M. Cutter W. Fierte Al. Daniel G. Colder's twin brother Baldur, who is half an inch taller. Dengin Mama. Parentheses.

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Thank you all so so much for listening to this episode and supporting us. We'll be back next week with another episode, but in the meantime, if you would like to join our elders, you can do so by going to patreon.com slash nad pod. That's gonna be it for me. Until then, stay cool and have a fun life. Bye bye!