Not Another D&D Podcast - C3 Ep. 53: Warm Welcome (The Ice Knife Saga)

Episode Date: February 9, 2024

Duck Team ventures into the tundra to find Calder's village! Callie recalls an ex-lover, Calder gets picked on, and Sol has a bad dream. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.Music / Sound Effects Include: “A Wizard’s Tournament” by Emily Axford."The Prodigal Sister" by Emily Axford."The Purge" by Emily Axford."The Hexblood Centurion" by Emily Axford."The Bronze Bastard" by Emily Axford."The University" by Emily Axford."Bittersweet Sixteen" by Emily Axford."The Smithy's Hut" by Emily Axford."Moonshine's Stump" by Emily Axford."The Fairy" by Emily Axford."Corrupted" by Emily Axford."Calder Kilde" by Emily Axford."Left is Left and Right is Center" by Emily Axford."A Memory" by Emily Axford."Tundra Trudge" by Emily Axford."Tarragon's Terrarium" by Emily Axford."The Lonely Autumn" by Emily Axford."Angels & Devils" by Emily Axford."A Fate Refused" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a Headgum Podcast. Hey everybody, it's Emily here to talk to you about Adam and Eve. Valentine's Day is peeking her pretty little head out from around the corner. Whether it's a day of love or self-love for you, how are you planning to spice things up in the bedroom this Valentine's Day? Ignite your Valentine's Day with adamandev.com. Toys, lingerie, they even have something called a clone a willy kit. How's that for the

ultimate compliment? And best yet, when you go to AdamandEve.com and select almost any one item, you'll get it at 50% off, almost any item. But that's not all. When you select your one item, you will also get free shipping not just free shipping discrete shipping so your neighbors have no clue what your Valentine's Day plans are. So head over to adamaneve.com and be sure to use offer code PAPA again that's P-A-W-P-A-W PAPA that's PAPA at adamaneve.com have a happy Valentine's Day you filthy sweeties. Welcome back to Bahumia everybody. Bahumia. I'm your dungeon master Brian Murphy joined by Jake Hurwitz. Betrayed by Birdie and feeling herty,

called her children. Who could forget Birdie, R.I.P. Yes. And then of course, Emily Axford. God damn it, now I want to do a birdie ride. Good luck. 2024, Rime No More, Kallaiope Petricol. Oh, you did it, I'm do a birdie rhyme. Good luck. 2024, rhyme no more, can I be petricore? Oh, you didn't have to do it.

She's a birdie rhyme. Feeling slurty ever since I saw birdie, can I be petricore? She's back. She was out for a moment. Extra rhyme. The whiplash. The rollercoaster. As is traditional, she was going to go into 2024, a month of rhymes, then of course take the rest of the year off But then she pivoted at the last second to go with a birdie run which it's gonna be a

Birdie more 2024 That's right And then of course we've got called well Tanner hang on I gotta get ready. You don't have a birdie rhyme ready dude I have a birdie I'm an instrument man Nights are cold, days are long. Try to be bold, try to be strong. But with my friends and birdie by my side, nothing can go wrong. Hold for frog song.

Yay! A very important part of that is that he had a wooden frog that he was rubbing with a stick. I don't know that it quite worked with the audio. It was really a great disagree, Mer. And overall, it's just a podcast. A great disagree! And now this entire episode is going to be scored by a wooden frog. I'm so fucking sorry, I can't play an instrument on our podcast. That's what Emily does all the time.

It's fucking gorgeous. It was gorgeous. No, you know what? I'm so impressed. Jake's weirdly quiet. Jake's pretty quiet. I don't know, he's running for your people. Fuck, it's me for both of us. I'm so fucking impressed.

I'm in between Murph and Emily, I think. I thought it was fine. I'm going between Murph and Emily, I think. I thought it was fine. I'm going intro obscure twenty three four. Twenty twenty four. Jake had a little bit of a scared look, like didn't know where Koggle was going with it. And I will say I was scared as well. When you broke out the wooden frog

and just kind of scraped it as you were talking, I thought, surely this can't be that much of a part and I saw it and I said I hope this roller coaster does flips and it did Yeah It did loop-de-loop. It also is a reference to was it dungeon court where you were doing sling poetry? I was thinking you were doing us so I married an axe murder in cadence. Kind of it's always been there a little bit. So you need to be caught up on dungeon court. Right. Well, no, no, that he has a frog with him.

Yeah, it was perfect. Yeah, it's perfect. The audience has followed. OK. Actually, last episode, we were talking about like not doing intros and doing alternative stuff. And I said I was going to get a cork keyboard and I looked, but they're kind of expensive. So I figured I would gonna get a cork keyboard, and I looked, but they're kind of expensive, so I figured I would use this frog statue that my friend Keanu got me.

That was definitely alternative, you were correct. Yeah. I think it was awesome. All right. Snaps for you, dude. I'll snap for you. I'll snap for you. Okay. Start the show again. And now you won't put it away the rest of you

have to do it, right? Yeah, I was like, okay, maybe I gotta tell them down the support. Get it away from the mic. Just for the sake of it not coming back during the episode. Alright, let's go ahead and do a little recap. So last time you battled avatars of Alexandrite who were disguised as puffin' folk. Saul and Kali battled the former Roscoe, while Calder and Vitek the Polar Orc battled Birdie and Clyde.

Birdie, why? Orc battled Birdie and Clyde. Birdie, why? During the fight, the avatars showcased their talent for mimicking your abilities, particularly Saul, who at one point was attached to her by an arcane leash. Callie told Alexandrite that she didn't have the charisma to pull off her plan of taking over the Feywild, but the AI retorted with a threat. She reminded Callie that the Fae were magically connected through their courts and would inherit the curse of their monarch. What would happen if she were

to get one of the crowns? Back on the battlefield, you were eventually able to destroy the avatars, with help from the Serpent's Incana, Vitek, and his fellow rookies were able to survive as well. After the fight, Calder was snuck up on by their leader, Commander Fuldar, who reprimanded the newbies for sneaking out on a rogue mission. Fuldar followed Calder to the cabin and you all shared information. The orc commander revealed that the village you were in, Flurry Harbor, was attacked by strange dwarves of Iron Deep, who then replaced the inhabitants with doppelgangers. Anyone Fuldar sent to investigate did not return, which prompted the rookies to set off on their own

rescue mission. During the talk, Fuldar revealed that Gowon Kilbe had been promoted to Ranger General, prompting a mixed reaction from Calder. Together, you decided on a direct route through the tundra to make your trip faster and Fuldar loaned you a sledge for all your help. Pulled by Honeysuckle, you took off into the icy plains. The ride to Ice Knife was going to take two days, so you planned to stop in the town of Coldbreak on the first night. You arrived there safely, but found the town completely abandoned.

Cal used the Speak with Animals spell on an arctic fox and learned that the town had been attacked by strange humanoids who left behind no bodies. You went to sleep for the night in an abandoned house, and that's where we are now. Now, is the mayor of this town a giant? That's important to know for what I will be wearing to sleep. Yes. Okay, so I'm probably wearing his sleeping cap, but as a nightgown, I've got a little hole in the top. Okay, so you're sleeping in a giant hat sort of as a sleeping bag, very cute, very fun. And with that, we actually will start

off with Saul. So that night, Saul, you're sleeping peacefully in your giant hat. Mm-hmm. Cute. And you are dreaming. After days in the cold, you find yourself floating on your back in a delightfully muggy swamp. Oh. The sky above you is still cold and gray

with fluffy snowflakes falling, but the water you're in is warm and full of moss grass. It's almost like you're in a giant natural like heated spring. Oh, yeah, that's the stuff. As you look up at the clouds relaxing, you feel someone floating next to you and you hear a familiar voice go, And you hear a familiar voice go, yeah, feels good, doesn't it, bud? Oh, yeah, this is really, this is really something we got to do this more often.

Swag? Yeah, you look over and you see swag floating next to you, looking relaxed and serene. And he goes, yeah, yeah, this is what it was like on the night's back in Moonstone. It's a little bit colder out here, but this is, this is it. This isn't bad at all. But, but we can't talk about swag begins to drift away from you a bit. The kind of sparse moss grass around begins to grow thicker and you begin to bob in between them. And you can still see him, but he's a little bit lost in this maze of green. Where am I?

I don't know. I wanted to come here though to, oh, I wanted to tell you something. So we haven't known each other long, but I just wanted to thank you. You've really helped me. You've helped me and I know we've just met, but I don't know hanging out with Callie and Calder and hearing them talk about their siblings. It just made me really glad that I've got someone as well.

That's why we're coming to rescue so we can, we can still be a part of each other's lives and you know, we can do stuff that family does, you know, I'm not exactly sure what that is, but this seems like it. We're doing it right now. He continues to kind of drift away amongst this moss grass. Hang on. I know, Saul, I know we didn't get to spend as much time together as we would have wanted to. But the the short time we did spend together, it I mean I was part of something really really bad and

You guys you gave me the opportunity to change that and and in the end I got I got to do something good. I Know it sounds I Don't know childish But you probably have a lot of the same dreams and thoughts as me. I got to be a hero at the end Saul. Yeah it's It's been amazing leaving Esri realizing just truly like what it what it means to be a part of something, to be a part of something big, to be a hero, but also to be fighting for these bonds that you formed. I I get it now.

I get why you left. I get why I wanted to leave. And that's why I'm still fighting. That's why we're still looking for you, for the ice knife, for a way to keep everyone safe. So, you know, you've been studying the bond of life and death, so you have to know you can't keep everyone safe. You see, continues to float farther can't keep everyone safe. You see, continues to float farther away in the moss weeds. You've gotta let me...

As he goes to say that, there is a sudden glitch in your vision as everything scrambles. The moss grass around you begins to wrap and pull at you, changing from grass into wires. And you hear swag scream, Sol! No! The wires whip around like sentient animals, snapping at their prey. Go ahead and give me a dex saving throw.

Okay. 14. Okay. Sol, you attempt to jump into the low branches of a dead tree, dead from being out in the cold here. You are freezing as soon as you're out of the steamy water. But as you jump up into the low branches of this dead tree, the living wires grab at the entire branch and easily yank it out, sending you falling towards the writhing mass of cables.

You see, as you're about to be pulled in, swag jumps up, catches you, using his momentum to push you higher into the tree. He goes to kick off to join you, but a wire whips around his ankle and pulls him into the lake of cables. As it pulls him, you see, he manages to get his face up to say one last thing.

He looks at you in the eyes and he goes, Boris Frigg! And then disappears under the wires. Huh? You guys all wake up in the morning to Saul shooting up in bed yelling huh? Boris Frigg. What's- Boris Frigg?

Do you- Huh? Maybe Boris Frigg? Boris Frigg? What's Boris Frigg? Do you, uh, maybe Boris Frigg? Boris Frigg? Does that mean anything to anyone? I feel like I fucked someone named Boris Frigg. Or was it Friggas Ball? It's unclear. Maybe, I saw swag in my dream.

He was, he was wrapped in wires. He was getting pulled down. I, I think the worst has happened, but we can't, we can't focus on that. He was trying to help me. He said Boris Frigg. He didn't wink when he said it. So I don't know if it was like a former romance partner of his or yours. All I know is we probably need to find him.

Calder, have you heard the name Boris Frigg? Romantically or otherwise? Calder, have you heard the name Boris Frigg? Romantically or otherwise? Calder, up to you if it was romantically. Have you frigged a Boris? Calder, you do know Boris Frigg? Boris Frigg was a ranger and one of your brother Gowen's close friends growing up. He was like part of your brother's friend group.

I would say you didn't have a close relationship with him, but he was like a good guy. Like if your brother were to stand up for you It would be like he would be part of the group of dudes that was you know backing him up He's a knock it off guy. He's yeah, yeah, whoa, Kelly you fucked Boris Frigg Yeah, friggin man, how do you know Boris Frigg now that I'm going back? I think it was Friggas boy I'm sorry. Yeah, think it was Frigus Boar. Frigus Boar. I'm sorry. Different guy. Is someone from the Feywild?

Does he call two? He's an auto-maladrin. He's really insufferable with the pumpkin spice stuff. Okay. Totally different guy. I can see that. The Boris Frig is not a friggin' boar at all. With the Feywild, a lot of times I know that your name kind of reflects your

personality so the fact that his name was BOR is not good. Yeah. He was just real straight down the middle. Yeah, just a rowdy pumpkin-swillin' dude. Foster nods knowingly somehow. I think he had like, I think he had breath spelled out in wood blocks on his mantle. And you had sex with him? I mean, yeah.

How was it? No, we don't have time. So wait, what? Swag just yelled Boris frig at you? And that was it? There was other stuff going on. It was clearly. You just had a dream where he was in wires

and yelled Boris frigigg at you. Right, yes, but you have to understand, I think that he was trying to reach out to me through the spores, through like the kind of clone network we share, through whatever means of connection we forge. He was trying to tell me something. Wipeh, he's wrapped up in Alexandrite. Is there any chance that Boris Frigg is wrapped up in Alexandrite too? I don't know. It doesn't sound like the Boris Frigg that I knew that Boris Frigg is wrapped up in alexandrite 2? I don't know it doesn't sound like the the Boris Frigg that I knew Boris Frigg the friggin man would be caught dead wrapped up in alexandrite.

It sounds like a legend. Yeah. He's legendary. Can you imagine Boris Frigg and Frigg is poor in one room together? They're polar opposites. They can never meet. Oh man. Well, if there's any chance he can help Swag or help us, we gotta give to him. Do you think he's in the ice knife?

Last time, last time I saw him was in the ice knife. I... he's a friend of my brother. We can... we can ask Gowen. Okay, let's tread carefully around him. I mean, it might be that swag has heard that like Alexandrite can't seem to get to him or he's some sort of linchpin that she's going after or it might be that he is her point of entry. Yeah, that'd be a tragedy.

He was the friggin' man. Sounds awesome. I can't wait to meet him. There's no way, yeah. If Alexandrite were to absorb Boris Frig, that would solve her charisma problem right there, huh? Fuck you, right. My God.

We all nod knowingly. I guess we should get going then. Yeah, I'm gonna just sweep the entirety of this mayor's protein bar coverage. Great. Yeah, I mean, Giants are giant. They stay jacked. It is weird that there's a big poster that says that in the mayor's box. Giants stay jacked.

Yeah, you grab some protein bars and some salted meats and whatnot, things that'll last long in the cold. You raid the larder. So you guys walk through the empty ghost town towards your sledge, doors and shutters clattering with the wind, animals skittering away. When you get to the sledge, Kenna loads up your equipment and gets honeysuckle attached to the rains. Calm down, please calm down. I gotta put the raids on or it's not gonna work. I'm so excited just going around in circles. You gotta have some pocket pebbles ready.

So cute what a problem you are. Yeah, she throws him some rocks so he stays still and eats them and she gets him all caught up in the rains. And once you guys are all loaded up, you shoot off into the icy tundra, the cold wind stinging you like a knife. I need two more DC 30 checks before Calder finds his village. The first one is the first half of the day. So Kenna is once again helping Calder navigate as Calder takes the rains. She's got her map up. It's flapping in the wind, and she's shouting,

we're going the right way, we're still going the right way, sir. Hi, hi. Yo, Dall, the song of Calder. Right on. To give you a bardic inspiration. Okay, so you got a bardic inspiration, Ken is gonna give you a help action,

and is gonna hit you with the squire inspiration for an extra D4. I'm singing Cal the cold sir. This is really catching on. Wow, if only you had some kind of looted frog to scrape. Reaching for it. Resisting, we're about to make a DC-30 check. I should not make Murph, Matt.

Weird, it's the wind picked up and it's a DC 35 check now. No. Wait, remind me what kind of check it is. It's a... It can be a history check for you because you kind of know the landscape here. Okay. Oh, wow. Shout out to the three creeps.

Nice. With advantage. Thank you, Kenna. That is a 15. So we're sitting at a 23 right now. OK, so then you've got a D4 from Saul, right? Yeah. And Saul, what are you doing to help?

I just give him an uncharacteristically firm grasp on the shoulder and say, let's get this done. Ow! Ow! Ow! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Oh!

You got this, man. What was that? Perfectly pinched a nerve. Veer off the trail. Down to ravine. Tally Ho, Tally Ho, bud. All right, so you've got 2D4s and a D8 from Cali. All right, that's a 3, so we got a 26, 28. Okay. So as long as I don't roll a 1 on Cali. All right, that's a three so we got we're at 26 28 okay, I don't roll a one on just don't roll a one

That's a six oh Man god, that's always dicey. I overcome my grievous shoulder injury my pinched nerve I pinch I pinched the other side so it's even all right right. It didn't need to be evened out. So you continue to sled through the icy plains and eventually, very kind of early in the day, the sun is blocked by the mountains up ahead. It goes from being these icy plains to being very rocky. This is where Mount Forge collapsed 200 years ago. The ice knife used to be like in the base

of the mountain or like around the bottom of the mountain here and now is in the ruins of the mountain. They've had to rebuild over the centuries. So it's created this mountain range of smaller mountains. Honeysuckle pulls tirelessly straight up a massive hill of white snow as the sun disappears behind the mountains and the cold hits you even Harder go ahead and give me your last nature check of the day I think everybody's hitting you with the same stuff Saul grabs your other shoulder and nerve pinches you His mind is elsewhere so all of his like Monk martial arts training is kicking in in the wrong way where he's like I know this

Point is important. I think it's nice. It's like no, that's a pressure point. He got you. It's really tender Let's go giant stay strong. I'm now singing colder kill day friend of the fey ice and snow get out of his way Okay What are you doing to me Emily? Okay. What are you doing to me, Emily? So now it's like, I know it's like a boasting song at the ice. I want to play along on the frog so bad. Okay.

I'm going to need everything. I'm sitting at a 19 right now. Okay, okay, okay. Wow, okay. 22. Got it, okay. All right. 25.

25. Okay, we need a five or higher on the D8. I don't want to show up tired. That's an eight, baby. Wow! Okay, so yeah, Callie Song, everybody begins singing together and despite the cold, you're able to keep your spirits up and you keep riding along and honeysuckle happily just hums along,

munching into the snow, continuously climbing up this hill. Now the way the ice knife is set up, they use the natural layout of the mountains as protection essentially, and the town center is in a big crater. The outer walls are the mountains themselves, with towers built into the natural dips in the geography. Before you get to the town itself, there is a tower at the top of the first hill called First Light. It's far south of the village at the highest point and it's supposed to set a beacon if there is any trouble out there to kind of warn the village.

As you climb this massive hill, you can see the tower coming into view. You can see from here that the beacon is not lit, but everybody go ahead and give me perception checks. Shout out to the two crew. OK. At 20. Wow.

Shout out to the two zero crew. I have like really it's like so cold that everything's like brighter. Yeah, Callie. Yeah, you lock in. You've you sort of embodied the winter eladrin part of you and you were able to see through all of the whipping wind and snow up ahead. Two things strike you as strange.

Okay. One is that and probably this is revealed once you mention it to Calder. A beacon would only be lit like if you needed to warn the village, but it would normally a tower like this would have some kind of light so that people could see through the storm to find the village if they're a friend or a traveler. So there's no light like cascading out, which is a little strange. But with Nat 20, you see dark figures in the snow that look like giants from here.

They look like maybe smaller humanoids from farther away. But you see a bunch of giants, about a dozen, at the top of the hill, with bows pointed at the sky, like they're about to unleash a flurry of arrows. Bows at the sky, like at the beacon, or? Bows up in the air, like they're going to release a volley of arrows. Okay, on us?

Uh-oh. Or are they attacking the sky? Problem with dragons or our arrow volleys the way that you deal with intruders in which case I think we've been labeled intruder. Yeah, or maybe there's ice bats. Is it ice bats? What? It's not ice bats I Ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths ice baths They got icicle fangs, they're scary. That sounds awesome. They don't live here. Okay, good. I think they're gonna shoot us. Oh shit.

Okay, if that's the case, then I think we need to communicate that we are friends. Right. Boris! Boris, are you up there? You see, somebody casts a cantrip and lights all of the arrows. So now you can see all of the Rangers at the top. You see about a dozen Rangers with these bows pointing them up in the air and you see one giant Ranger atop a woolly mammoth that emerges once you start speaking, once you start yelling.

He wears a long white cloak to blend in with the snow. It matches the snow-covered fur of his giant mount. He's got scarves wrapped around his face and a pair of goggles. Under his cloak, he wears the black-boiled leather of the Rangers. On his back, you see he's got his massive bow and on his hilt a giant axe. And you hear this giant on the mammoth yell towards you what do you know of Boris do I recognize that voice go ahead and give me a perception check shout out to the three cre becomes a eight it's been a while since you've been here and it's kind of echoing and they're kind of putting on an authoritative voice. You're having kind of a hard time reading it

Okay, then I'll just yell back that he's the friggin man You hear a voice call back Who are you? State your purpose kill day called her kill day Returning home and where is Best Friends? Solbuffo and Callie Petricor. You see the giant on the mammoth like holds his hand up for you guys to stop. Honeysuckle stops obediently kind of just laying there looking up at you guys and what to do.

You see the giant takes a moment talks to some of his rangers and yells back Smolder kill day did you say I? Think there's a frosts noam village on the other side of the mountain. I look at Callie. It's all he's kidding What the fuck did you just say talking about he's talking about somebody else? Callie obviously, but like focus up hey, that's my buddy you're talking about Yeah, that's that's my brother. I'm talking about get up here brother Come on Calder jumps off the sledge and runs You see your brother Gregor takes off his scarf, runs down, and as he gets close, he stops short, so he does sort of an ice skating like slides to cover you in snow. That was hilarious, you should have seen your face.

I bet it was no idea. That's for sending a fucking violent crow to me. He pushes you? What? The violent crow. Crow to me. He pushes you. What? Violent crow sent us a crow that said to watch out for mother ship And you said the violent one on purpose and he clawed at my face and now I have a little nick on my face Oh, yeah, I can't even see it. It must have healed perfectly He he brings you in and he picks you up kind of patronizingly like in a hug

Put me down and he goes good to see you Jeff and he calls you Jeff because Your mom used to call you giant heart which turned into giant fart which turned into gf which then turned into jiff Wow, it's such a family mic man. I love Good to see you jiff Your friends a collective at your gory said yeah, so before and then this is Kena and our worms. Hi, you're really being decaltered. We don't appreciate it.

That's our night. It's just it's just this way of rousing me. It's just rousing. We're just rousing. We're just having some fun. It's what families do. Psh, I know. Yeah, totally.

Oh, definitely not what mine does. Yeah. Is it what families do? I don't actually know. Yeah, anyway, you're kind of freaking everybody out. Why are you guys talking about Boris? What do you really want me to explain because if I explained it, it's just gonna make you more confused. All right, let's get inside Let's get some more warm, right? Okay. Okay. All right. Yeah. Can we say that we have our sunglasses on by the way? Yeah, I'm always wearing a scouter. Yeah, you've got your scouter on. Everybody looks green and organic. Nice. You see Gregor takes you into the tower. There are a lot of Rangers here. Calder, you know, usually first light is just one or two people

just to make sure there isn't some far off danger. There is a brazier lit in the tower, kind of strategically placed behind the wall, so it gives off as little glow as possible so anybody sneaking up might not see it. But inside here it's pretty well lit, the orange light of the fire reveals a spiral staircase that goes up to the top. In this room down here there are crates and barrels full of supplies. Some of the rangers know you, Calder. They look pretty grim and business-like, but a few of them patch you on the shoulder or say, hey,

but go back to their posts watching this giant hill. Careful, my shoulder, it's a little sensitive. They pat your shoulder anyway. Sorry. And Gregor brings you into the tower and collapses on these stacks of grain that he set up to be like furniture and he goes Okay, obviously I've got like a lot of questions for you, but first off

Saying Boris's name freaked us the fuck out because Boris disappeared this morning Just this morning. Yeah, okay and like not regular disappeared where you just like went off on a hunting trip and died or disappeared or something. Like was going to the tower in the morning and then we found like his rings and his clothes. Oh no. I'm gonna do a quick scan of the room

to make sure we can talk freely. Yeah. Yeah. 19 perception. 19 perception. You look around. There are Rangers here on your scouter. You're seeing everybody is green. But I will also say that you do know that Alexandria was evolving. So you don't know for sure that nobody here is connected to Alexandria. But Gregor has kind of pulled you guys off to the side

because he's really excited to have called her back. But outside it kind of freaking us out. What's going on? Oh, yeah, no, you know, nothing. I was, you know, I was living in Esri at a job. And that went bad because you sent us, you were working for mothership and you sent us a letter with a violent bird. Right.

And by the way, that little snow thing, that's not the only payback. One day, and it might be today, it might be tomorrow, it might be in ten years, I'm gonna punch you in the face. No. What the fuck? You have to live with that. That's not commensurate at all. You just have to live knowing that that's gonna happen. Wow.

Gregor, no. If you saw this bird, he was big and he was scary. I didn't see the bird. Yeah. I let this bird. He was big and he was scary Yeah, let it go. He was fierce. He had fierce talents. Okay. Come on. You're you're very tough. He nicked me Okay, it was weeks ago. Maybe he grew in migration. Yeah Okay, fine, but I don't feel like punching me in the face in 10 years is a fair Right. Anyway. Yeah, you told us to watch out for mothership and kind of good thing you did. There was part of the reason we're on kind of high alert right now is there was an attack at East watch today.

East watch and called her, you know, that East watch is, you know, further in closer to the village. And that's where like the barracks is where all the Rangers are this, even though there are a bunch of Rangers here right now. This is not normally where everyone's stationed. And Gregor goes, they they noticed some strange Rangers that seemed a bit unfamiliar. They got KG and then when confronted, the Rangers attacked. Is everyone OK?

Not not everyone know we lost a couple people but we were able to, well I wasn't there I say we as in like we the Rangers of the of the village but um apparently they fought a bunch of these like android zombie guys that got like wires coming out of them and they were able to turn into giants and you know know, do do all kind of stuff. And now Gowen's all paranoid. He's got me out here at first watch, which is like the shittiest place to be. You know, it's like we shared a womb when you got me out here in first watch.

Well, I guess Gowen's got to make these tough decisions now. Oh, God, you sound like Gowen. You sound like him. No, I don't. It looks around at you guys. You guys got like older siblings or anything. Oh god, he sound like Gowon. He sound like him. No, I don't. Looks around at you guys. You guys got older siblings or anything? Yeah, I've got a brother who's kind of also my dad.

Oh, interesting. Yeah. Gregor, nods. Right on, right on. I guess that's kind of what Gowon is for you, huh? Shut the fuck up. He's not my goddamn dad. He's my twin brother.

We're exactly the same. It's all blinks, not knowing god damn dad. He's my twin brother. We're exactly the same Stop links not knowing what he said Looks like looks a Cali. Yes. Yeah, I do have an older sister. Yeah. Yeah They're a lot right Really? I always kind of fantasized about having a twin I thought that having a twin was like having a best friend for life. You think that right? You think that we share the You'd think that we shared a womb. You'd think that, right? Who came out first? She did.

Oh. They fucking holding it over my head. I feel like you really need to have a conversation with him. Try it. You're living the dream. You realize that, right? Being a twin. Is it?

Yeah. It's the fucking dream. Oh, okay. Well, maybe is it a dream being twins with someone who's fucking perfect? Apparently we're fraternal, because apparently I'm not perfect. Who's telling you this? The world. You know, I might be a twin. I've got a bunch of clones somewhere out in the world. Oh, that's right! So yeah, I know what it's like man I try way too hard to identify. Yeah. Yeah, you know, you know Anyway, sorry colder. Yeah, goins goins been a dick

Wow. Well, you know, I I never really Realized you guys had your own relationship. I feel like I always viewed it through My own eyes. I looked up to both of you, but... Oh, shit, you lose out to me? Oh, no. No, I didn't. I mean, just like, because you're taller. Loser? I think you're a loser. I push them.

Loser? Crap, see where you said it hurt on your shoulder? No, no, no. That's super tender. All right, yeah, anyway. A tap? Yeah. Wow. That's right. So we sent you out here. What did you find? We haven't found anything except for except for you guys actually. It's lucky that uh, I was here because

Otherwise they might have thought you guys were maybe with them. Oh in fact, I should probably You see he laughs I should probably like check and make sure that you guys aren't weird creatures Pretending to be my family and he looks at me. You actually should pretty intensely called her Okay, oh you said you looked up to me that seems weird and open and Not the type of thing we would say to each other. Yeah, I'm just I've learned I've learned a lot living in the city, traveling with my friends. I started sharing, but I'll stop.

Go ahead and give me a persuasion check with Advantage, Calder. Is that a 14? Gregor nods suspiciously and then does look over at you Saul and goes Okay, okay Well the story is starting to add up and you say that you have maybe like a brother father situation and maybe other clones out there so

Strangest thing the attack on East Watch also had a bullywug. He sort of revealed that he was a bullywug, and that's sort of what tipped off the Rangers so that they were able to get the jump on the replicants or whatever you want to call them. I scramble up Gregor and put my face right next to his did his face look like my face Was he punching people a lot? I wasn't there. Okay. Who was there? Who can we talk to about this? I think Gowan was there I think yeah, all right. I mean I want to talk to freaking Gowan about this But like maybe if you're there, I guess make a make an appointment with his squire or something like that

I guess make make an appointment with his squire seriously They he takes appointments the squire takes appointments you see to kind of look stressed out am I supposed to be taking appointments for you guys? No, okay, I'll do it for miss Petricor You need to hold a clipboard. Yeah, okay if anybody wants to talk to miss Petricor anymore you go through me All right, I'll make an appointment I'll be home later if you want to you know meet up at mom and dad's place or or whatever yeah yeah no whatever I'll see you there I guess I mean I don't give a shit but you know if you want to catch up maybe I'll see you hang on whatever maybe I'll see you yeah okay maybe I'll see you maybe it, okay. Maybe I'll see you. Maybe it won't otherwise for my sake Would you two hug each other?

Like not about what you need. It's what I need really bad. Yeah, could it be like a shivery thing that you yeah I double dog dare you Both of you hug each other I'm tight to communicate how much you've missed each other using all your muscles to speak your love. You see, Gregor Polganin. And if you don't, you're both scaredy cats. Oh no, not a scaredy cat.

I dive in. Get a glurry schedule. Gregor gets down on a knee. You always appreciated it when your brothers didn't like pick you up to hug you. So he leans down to give you a big hug. And he gives you a big hug and you hear some sniffling. Glad you're fucking back and they were fucking safer or whatever. Who cares? Me too. It's fucking cold outside. Yeah, it's good here. Okay. Yeah. Say hi to mom and dad. They missed you, okay?

It's out of going to, we love them, but we hate them. You know, we suck. Don't hold my hand or whatever. Okay, you can tell them that I hate them. Don't tell me, okay, I love you. Okay, I love you, bye. Fuck you, go. I shove them away from the hug.

Get the fuck out of here. Yeah, you see some of the giants nearby are snickering at him. Shut up, shut the fuck up. I was dared. It was a dare, I did it. All right. Well, Calder, do you want to show off your investigation skills to everyone in the village?

Maybe we see if we can find any clues about what happened to Boris? Do you want to see your mother and your father? Yeah, let's go to my house, we can... Let's not delay a reunion that you've been... We can get as much information as possible Yeah Maybe circle up with Gowan

Be nice to have, you know, some dinner too, right? Ha ha ha Are you hungry, Kanna? Oh... No, squires don't get hungry Ha ha ha ha I'm only... I'm hungry when you guys are hungry I can eat whatever you guys can eat

Ha ha ha ha Kanna, I think you need to schedule in a hug with us Yeah, okay, schedule a hug with Miss Petrichor, okay? Wow, this is fun. This could really go to my head. If I know my family, they'll have a giant stew going just for you, Kether. Oh, all right. Sweet.

So you guys leave the tower, say good-byes to Gregor for now. And it is a decent trek to get to the town itself. It is all downhill, but it takes like almost an hour to get there. It's really out of the way. It is in Gregor's defense. It's a shitty place to put your brother. But you also kind of understand like if he trusts Gregor, he would want him like out on kind of like near the front lines.

As you begin to go downhill, the mountains are no longer blocking your view of the village. Surrounded by moonlit snow, you see the glow of huge bonfires and braziers in the town square, smoke from individual fireplaces, fill the air, and since the citizens are mostly giants, you can see movement even from here. Out in the tundra, even the frost giants can get cold, but not here where the mountains block most of the wind, and there is always a warm hearth to sit by. There's a sort of echo effect of being closed in by these mountains, so the village sounds

a lot louder than it actually is. You hear a cacophony of voices, but see there's only like, you know, some people out. And around the outside of the town, along the mountain paths, you can see lights from the different towers. First Light is the southernmost tower that's behind you, but there are big towers to the north and west None of the beacons are lit up So there's no active battle seemingly but the east tower is the biggest one and there was a barracks there where the Rangers live That one is a light with giant torches and seems to be buzzing with activity

I'm gonna cover my face and kind of walk in the shadow of honeysuckle because seems like a frog that looks like me potentially just committed a crime here so I'm gonna try and keep a little profile. You're the wanted one now. I look for like a wanted poster of soul and like what the bounty is. I'll say you guys get down into like the town itself you smell firewood and roast meat in the air, braziers outside of various businesses and lanterns hanging from their roofs, separating the town square from the residential district. There's a big lake of ice that leads off

to an icy waterfall to the north. People are finishing up their day, closing their shops and heading home or to the most popular place in town. There's this tavern called the North Star. There's a sign swinging in the wind with a silver star on it. There are paths for you from here to get to one of the towers or the barracks. There's also a path for you to get across like where this frozen lake is and get to the residential district where your parents home is. So the residential district is on the other side of the frozen lake? Yeah. Okay. Is it other side of the frozen lake? Yeah. Okay.

Is it close to where the waterfall is? No, waterfall is like on the outskirts of town. Gotcha. Well, you know, if Kenna's hungry. No, I'm definitely. Hey, let's not, I recid by hunger. I strike it from the record.

Kenna, I double dog dare you to admit that you're fucking hungry. Fine, I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I could eat. But we can just have a snack. We've got this protein. I can just do a snack. You guys let me know where you guys want to go first.

I prefer to call her. My mom's going to kill me if I don't come straight home. That's what I figured. Hey there, NADPOLS. This episode is brought to you by NetSuite. Hey, is it taking you forever to close those books? Well, if this is you, you should know these three numbers.

They are 37,000, 25, and one 37,000. That is the number of businesses that have upgraded to NetSuite by Oracle. NetSuite is the number one cloud financial system streamlining accounting, management inventory HR and more 25 that other number I mentioned NetSuite turns 25 this year That is 25 years of helping businesses do more with less close their books and days not weeks and Drive down costs and that last number one, because your business is one of a kind. So get a customized solution for all of your KPIs.

That is key performance indicators folks in one efficient system with one source of truth. So you can manage risk, get reliable forecasts and improve those margins. Everything you need to grow all in one place. Finally, right now you can download net sweetsuite's popular KPI checklist designed to give you consistently excellent performance absolutely free at Netsuite.com slash Paw Paw. That is Netsuite.com slash Paw Paw to get your very own KPI checklist that is Netsuite.com slash Paw Paw. Thank you, everybody.

Hello, NAD Poles. Caldwell here. Now, as you might know, Valentine's Day is right around the corner, and no matter your relationship status, we can all agree that some things are better together. I'm talking about peanut butter and jelly, dungeons and dragons, and of course, Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble. Sorry, Emily, I couldn't resist. But hey, do you know what else is a perfect match? I'll tell you, it's me, my anime-inspired workout playlist, and my Raycon Everyday Earbuds. I use them whenever I'm working out, walking the dog, or going for a run. And thanks to the optimized gel tips, my Raycon stay in my ears no matter how awkwardly I run,

or how high I jump while I'm pretending to be an anime protagonist during the opening credits song. This is a real thing I do and I really don't know why I'm admitting it in the middle of an advertisement, but let's press on. No matter how long and strange your runs get, Raycon is here to stay with 8 hours of playtime and a 32 hour battery life. These buds also come with 3 customizable sound profiles and noise isolation. So if your ears are ready to fall in love, go to buyraycon.com today to get 15% off your

Raycon order plus free shipping. That's buyraycon.com to score 15% off and free shipping by raycon.com slash papa. That's it for me. Thanks for listening. Happy Valentine's Day and enjoy the show. Sweet home it is. You walk along a path that you've walked dozens of times before. I'll say that you know when you were younger you probably you probably barbacked at this tavern here, the North Star. You had worked and lived in the town square and gone up and visited your mom when she was ranging at one of the towers. You've made this walk home from the town square to your house a million times. And you guys, Callie and Saul, while this is a village, it is a giant village. So even though there aren't that many buildings and stuff,

everything is fucking huge. All of the log cabins that you see in this residential district as you get to it are extremely big, like some of the biggest houses you've ever seen, but built very simply. It's very sort of Spartan for being so huge. Klaipi remembers that huge, buff bodyguard, automaton she got to be once, and longs for that experience of feeling so strong and powerful. Calder, you find a log cabin that looks very similar to the other cabins nearby. Out front you see the sigil of the town,

a banner that your mom has flown proudly because she was the ranger general. You see like an old flag with a blue knife on a white background that's been weathered through the years outside of this one home that you recognize as your childhood home That's me right there. Oh And I walk down the path and I know the front door is for guests So I go around the side which is the the way the family goes in right on Which doll should we use colder? You guys are with me. You're good. You can come this way I keep getting stuck in Giants footprints, but I think I'll still knock Should we use Calder? You guys are with me, you're good. You can come this way. I keep getting stuck in Giant's footprints.

But I think I'll still knock. It's been many years. Calder, you hear a voice from the other side. You recognize this voice as your mother's calling out. Gowen, I told you, you can just come in. Always so proper, just come in. Ah, open the door and I call out, Mother! Mother! You...

It's not going! Enter this big, warm cabin. Callie and Saul, you guys see this large, dire bear skin rug in the middle of the floor. A huge wood-burning stove that lights up the room. The walls are lined with paintings and mounted weapons. The heads of great beasts, including a centerpiece that is a dire moose. This enormous moose head with huge horns that extend out. And Calder, you see your mother comes running towards you. You guys feel the whole house shakes as she begins to run towards Calder, swoops down and gives you this huge hug.

Calder, my giant heart, my giant heart, you're back. Hey, hey mom, hey, how's it going? You see Calder's mom for the first time. She is built like an absolute brick shit house. 20 feet tall, has the build of like a retired football player, thick, powerful arms sort of and just very strong looking. She's wearing like a woolen shirt. She's got this beautiful long gray hair. Her face is wrinkled, but she has this like childlike twinkle in her eye as she looks over at you two, Saul and Callie.

I collapse into a curtsy. I think Saul has been so overwhelmed by feelings of family and inclusion that he just goes in for the hug with Calder. Yeah, you see, Mira pulls you guys in for a hug. Friends of Calder's are friends of mine, certainly. Come on in, come on in. He's a very dear friend of mine. Come on out of the cold.

You see, she closes the door behind you guys. Get over here, sit near the fire, sit near the fire. Are you all right, Calder? Are you hurt? Did anyone try to mess with you when you came in? Kind of, but not in a really bad way. Was it Gregor? Was it Gowen?

You have to tell me. No, no, no, Gregor. It was Gregor. OK. Don't worry, we'll punish him. We'll punish him. Don't worry, we'll punish him. It didn't. it was Gregor okay no Don't worry. We'll punish him. No don't punish him. It didn't know for a good angel. It will punish him Don't punish him. Don't tell him. I told you anything. It was just it was just brother stuff just goofing me It's what brothers do apparently. Yeah, it was really cute and charming. It was cute charming. Okay Yeah, good. I'm gonna punch me in the face. He's gonna punch me in the face

Okay, okay, we'll make sure that doesn't happen called her introduce me who are your friends? Oh, yeah, um So before I pee Patrick or so before Nice to meet you and honey suckle as well actually hi room mom mom. Oh looks like you've shoveled for us. Thank you so much I remember my chores Yeah, that's how he eats You see she takes a long look at you, Callie. I peer up from my curtsy. Forgive my presumption.

You're a winter deladrin. Yeah, I mean, I'm an eladrin, and I'm currently feeling very wintry given my atmosphere, but I'm from the Feywild, which I think you guys must know to some capacity, because you have a portal to the Feywild here. It's spilling out my- and my words are spilling out and I realize I don't know what she knows. Or you don't, or I made that up. You see, she gives you a long look and looks at the four of you with Kanna and keeps looking at all of you and nodding. Yes, it's very interesting, Calder, very interesting. Yes, well, of course, yes, we have the Rift in the Sky of the Feywild and yes, there's a portal there.

Yeah, okay, so it's Common Knowledge. Yes, well, the portal of course is common knowledge. Calder, you're sending us letters. You say that you were working for mothership, and now you say, watch out for mothership. Right, so I lost my job, mom. Oh, that's, didn't you need me to beat anyone up or yell at anyone? No, it's okay.

I think I kind of quit. It was mutual. Didn't you need me to punish Greg or yell at anyone? No, it's okay. I think I kind of quit. It was mutual. Didn't you need to punish Gregor or? No, I don't think so. May I ask what you do to punish him? What do I do to punish Gregor? Yeah, I'm just curious. I make him read a book.

That's too harsh, Mom. He's super well read now. Your family's absolutely fucking charming. So cozy in here. No, we were working for Mothership. We found out, you know, it was a really bad company and then we found out it was actually a really evil company and now they're kind of in the midst of taking over the world

and we're just, we're trying to stop them. The constructs or androids who attacked they I assume perhaps had something to do with mothership. Yeah. Yeah, we encountered them at Flurry Harbor. And then we were at Coldbreak and it was deserted. Oh, yes. And now they've made it here.

I've heard about Coldbreak. As far as I know, there were about a dozen of them who attacked at the East Tower and they were Destroyed that's only the beginning. There's more. Where are the remains? Yeah, do you have the corpses? Well, you know as the former ranger general I am of course retired So it's in Gowen's hands now. I let Gowen do things his way. Yeah, but a doctor never stops looking at boo boo's, you know? Yeah, you see, you look around the house and you see, it called her that she's gotten

really into woodworking and has made like dozens of bows. And you see, she begins, as you start talking about this stuff, she just begins starting to whittle complicated carvings into one of the new bows. I've just been busying myself, whatnot. Wow, this is a beautiful bow, mother. Can I pick up one of these bows? Yeah.

Do you all want a bow? Oh, sure. I feel like it might be a little big for me. I make them for children. Not that your child. Honestly, I've seen your children. They could absolutely stump me. I've seen your children. They could absolutely stomp me. So here's children.

Yes, I could be your child. And she also goes, oh, what am I thinking? Your father's out back. He was just going to bring in something for dinner. Yergh, yergh, Calder's back. And you see this sort of gruff looking old man, a little bit skinnier

than your mom. And she's like, oh, I'm going to be a good girl. Yergh, Calder's back! And you see this sort of gruff looking old man, a little bit skinnier than your mom, sort of always has like resting grumpy face, like everything is just kind of pointed downwards, but has like a really long goatee, but like mostly bald up top, but he lights up when he sees you. Ah, Calder!

Sir, how are you? I extend my hand for a handshake. He lights up when he sees you. Ah, color. Ah. Ah, sir. How are you? I extend my hand for a handshake. He gives you a handshake, pulls you in for a hug, tosses you hair. Ah, and you? Oh, looks at you, Callie. I extend a firm hand. Ah, gives you a firm handshake.

It's me, you sir. Firm, yes, firm. And you? It all slips back into his like mothership days and salutes He awkwardly salutes you You're back a mothership bed Yeah, yeah Yeah, glad you're glad you're good and you're you're good. Yeah, I'm good. You guys want a snack?

Yeah, yes, sir. Yeah, I'm a snake. All right. Yeah, you see I'm your looks nice. Yergh goes out back enters like he's got like an outdoor freezer back there He essentially just hangs like meat in a shed out back and Yergh was also a ranger But unlike your your mom who's kind of like more of an adventurer Yergh was like a hunter and Y Yurg also is kind of a cook. So Yurg comes back in, begins carving up the meat and begins cooking up like a stew for you guys. Like makes way, way too much food.

And very quickly, the whole room smells of roast meat. Can I check on Kena, see if she's holding it together? Yes, she's just so excited. This is awesome. God, can we just live here? Yeah, I was wondering why you ever left. Do you guys ever get high in the meat shed? Whoa. Gowen did.

It was epic. What were you saying about Gowen? Nothing. This is delicious. It's Gregor behavior. Yeah, you see um Your mother your father join you your father's kind of a quiet guy Obviously like happy to see all you guys and everything and he's well-natured. He's got like a grumpy face

But you know sort of an affable guy, so he's sitting next to like Cal and goes Everything's going Quite the hunter. Got anything interesting lately? Nah. Nah. You ever heard of Oberyn? Yeah. Ever been to the Beastlands?

No. Wish. Wish. You gotta go one of these days. It's a hunter's paradise. Oh, read a book about it. Yeah. Yeah. Really big frogs. Your son's been there. Oh. He looks at at you called her impressed and you see Mira leans in have a giant mutton chop in my mouth. Oh, you've been to the Beastlands. Oh Yeah, yeah, I've uh I've done a bit of traveling with these guys. He's been all over

Yes. Yes. I I very obviously happy to have you home, but I'm sort of Curious of why you've traveled all the way here. Surely didn't all just Come here to hide or settle down after you left mothership, especially your timing is interesting. Well, now that we're all fed, I think we do have some things to discuss. We're investigating two things, I guess. We're trying to figure out what happened to Boris Frigg. Oh, so are we. And then we're also here to protect the ice knife

from these androids. You three are going to protect the village. We're going to help if you'll have us. Yeah, we've we've been protecting other villages. They they trusted us to work and fight in Esri. And we've been part of other resistances. Do you know about the relic behind the waterfall? Her eyes widen at that. She takes a big gulp and starts to choke on whatever she was eating.

Relic! I'm too small to give you a hand! I run full speed at her stomach. You just try to give her the hum. You just dive at her stomach and she spits up this giant piece of meat. It lands on me. Ah! Trapped! Yeah, Yurg chairs a look with Mira and Yurg gets up and starts cleaning up and Mira looks at you guys and goes,

How did you find out about A relic behind the waterfall? We found out about it because we basically hacked into this system and found out that that's what she's going for. system and found out that that's what she's going for. Your enemy knows, and thankfully we know, but your secret wasn't exactly secret enough. It's vulnerable information now. Mira leans back and looks very worried. So that's what these androids are after. Yeah. Yes. I mean, the ice knife is only supposed to be known by the Ranger General and their

inner circle, but it's an ancient artifact, so theoretically we're not the only people that know about it, but I thought it mostly forgotten. This android had a way of remembering forgotten things and it wants to use it to get to the Feywild. And once it gets to the Feywild it's game over. You see she goes from looking worried to once again giving you guys all that look that she was giving you when you first came in and you were talking about being from the Feywild, and she goes, you know, called, or I've always suspected something of you and the fact that all of you are here together is I think it is destiny. I think you are, I think you are supposed to be here. I think this is good. You believe in destiny? Of course.

This close to the Feywild. How romantic. Oh, you suspected I had a destiny to fulfill. Yes, well, now that you know about the ice knife, I suppose I Might as well tell you the whole story, but this stays between us understood Of course, of course, so we move to the couch. We can move to the couch if you'd like

Let's take it to the couch. Let's take it to the couch. Why not? You see, she brings you guys out to the couch. I get lost in a cushion. I dive in. No, you're still not dead. Solid Calliarm lost for a long time. Wow. Careful, Gregor's farted down there. He stinks like fucking giant thoughts in here. That was his fortress.

Are you sure it wasn't you? Because I heard your nickname. You see, Kano dives in to save you guys. I reward her with a pretzel I found in the cache. You see, Mira throws another log under the fire and begins sort of mindlessly carving at this large bow while she talks to you all. And she goes, the story of the ice knife is tied to the story of the Feywild. Thousands of years ago, after the gods abandoned this world, the material plane was in somewhat

of a magical dark age, but the Feywild flourished. They still had their gods living amongst them, the Archfey. Now, the Feywild, despite its name, had its own politics and power grabs, and eventually there were Archfey who used their powers to open gates to the material plane. Some to seek refuge, some seeking to rule it. Now there is some matter of debate over whether the rift in our sky is one of those original gates, but suffice it to say there were gates opened here in the

frigid north through which creatures of the fey entered Bohemia. Now, there were dragonkin and giantkin that existed on the material plane, but the Fae Wild brought even more of them. And unlike the Fae Wild where magic and tricks rule the day, the material plane has hard rules and can be won by strength and sword. So the original small folk of this world were forced into hiding just mere witnesses to a great war between dragons and giants who fought for the realm. The Material Plane was threatened with another apocalypse, so an Eladrin demigod named Ariox. She locks eyes with you, Callie. I blush blue.

Ariox joins the war on the side of the Giants. But while some Giants believed he would lead them to conquer the realm, he was secretly working to restore balance. Once the dragons and giants were diminished enough that the small folk could build their cities, Ariox sealed the gate, stopping the Feywild from invading the material plane. And that is why the Ice Knife was made, so that someday perhaps we might open it back up, but originally it was used to lock the rift So it's a key indeed

Now this quote-unquote betrayal Came as a shock to many of the Giants except for us Our ancestors were trusted allies of Ariox. We saved the world from being conquered, but at the cost of betraying our own brethren. The specifics of the conflict are largely forgotten, and there have since been many wars amongst giants, but still it is said that the cavern where the ice knife lies is cursed. They say that a paladin of Grumps killed Ariox with the ice knife itself and cursed his resting place. Now, I don't know if all of that is true, but the cavern in which the ice knife supposedly lies is definitely haunted. I investigate it as a brazen young Ranger General. the ghosts warned me not to tarry there without purpose.

Do you believe it? Did you feel... Ariox there? I do believe it, yes. What happened? There are... different stories I've been told, but I believe that... Ariox came clean about the true intentions of his plan. He was confronted by

another party with conflicting views and they killed each other in that cavern. I guess I meant more like what happened in the haunting. in the haunting. All I know is I went into the caves there. I followed where I knew the ice knife to supposedly be and I was greeted by a strange specter who advised me not to travel further that it was not the time. Oh

Maybe the time is now. Yeah. Would you trust us to go there? I would. We can take Gregor with us as kind of an educational mission for him. Interesting. I'll make him read so many books.

Okay, good, good, good. Well, technically, whatever is to be done about this situation is to be decided by the Ranger General and his Rangers. So maybe bring this to Gowen and he will likely not want you to get involved. So the only way that you would find where the ice knife was was be, if you were to sneak around my office or something and find

I'm not I'm doing it. I Can't pass without trace on myself. I've got greater invisibility. I go sneak around She had a lot of wine. She's probably got a pee I pretend to fall inside the couch and then face step into the office. Yeah, Cali you at sneak into her office and you easily find what she was talking about. You find an old book that is like an atlas that has maps of different layouts and stuff. And it looks like it's a map of what the village used to look like when it was inside the mountain of Mount Forge. of what the village used to look like when it was inside the mountain of Mount Forge. But you see, based on the layout and stuff, there are markings to tell of a specific place inside a cavern network that lines up to where that frosty waterfall is now.

You assume this is a map to the ice knife, but it has not been marked in case anyone from the outside were to find this. I painstakingly copy it into watercolor. Rad. Hell yeah. While she's doing that, can I ask Mira some more questions about the attack in the East Tower? Sure. Yes.

Well, I heard that maybe there was a bully walk there. Yes, I believe that only one of the bodies was kept and it was a Bullywog's body was brought to the Alchemist. To the... There's an Alchemist? There's an Alchemist. Her name is Ingrid. She does good work. Okay, yeah, what sort of work does she normally do? Potions or autopsies? It's a wide range, okay?

Yeah. Thank you, thank you. So he was he was defeated. I would hope so, certainly. Yeah. No, that'd be for the best. Thank you, Mira. It's all kind of shimmies in between the couch cushions. We can we can go so we can We can go to the Alchemist. We've got so much to do. Are you sure? I don't want to delay. This is your brother father. It's true. Your bro dad. Brad.

Yeah. I don't know. You've all shown me how important family can be. So I can't turn my back on this. Not now. And we can't venture to the ice knife until daylight. It's too cold to go out into the wilderness now. Once Callie gets back from the bathroom. I face that into the bathroom and then flush the toilet a ton of times. Oh, she must have really had to go.

And then walk out. That's multiple courtesy flushes if you can believe it. Yeah. That's how fucking courteous I am, I say. You see, Yerg is waiting for you outside the bathroom. Just goes, nice. Thank you. My diet's atrocious.

Mine too. Double flush. I give him another firm hand. He gives you a firm hand, say. All right. Yeah. Double floss. I can hear him in my other firm hands. He gives me a firm handshake. All right. Yeah. All right. Yeah.

Not bad. Not bad. Just nods his head. All right. Callie. Yeah, when Callie gets back, I explain where we're headed. Is that okay? Absolutely.

All right. Calder, do you know where Ingrid lives? Would I? You do know Ingrid. You know that she is in the town square It's it's the place where you'd buy potions. It's also a place where there are other You know clerics and stuff like that, but she's also sort of like the magitek person if that makes sense so Bringing swag there or bringing one of these bodies there. She would be the most

bringing one of these bodies there. She would be the most knowledgeable person. She's an artificer, essentially. Yeah, we can go through the town square. Afterwards, we can go to the North Star. I can show you the stall where Gregor and Gowyn locked me for two hours one time while they got drunk with their friends. I'd like that. I'd really like that, Calder. Sweet. You guys run out of the house. I had to go back of soup. Great.

You get a big bag of soup. Your gives you guys a break big bag and Mira goes, be sure to be sure to come back. You're staying with us, right? Or else would we stay? I don't know. My old room still the same. You see, she. No, tell me I hasn't been turned into the fitness room!

There's... Can I do the tech magic to see if there's a treadmill? There's... it's an office with a treadmill in it. No! I'm sorry, I got really into running while I was retired and... We already had a guest room. I didn't have Gregor's home all the time. I couldn't change his room. Wow. Okay. I'll sleep on the treadmill.

Yeah, we'll be back. No, you don't. We'll get... We have a pullout bed. We'll be good. I'll get you set up. You go off, you talk to the alchemist, or you talk to your brother Gowen, or whatever else you need to do. We'll get you set up here so you're nice and cozy. Okay.

All right. I'll see you in a little bit I love you very much. Thanks mom. Missed you mom. Okay. Love you all very much. Bye. Bye Sweet you guys run off back to the town square And you find Calder you've been to this place before if you got like scrapes and bruises or something You might buy like a salve to fix yourself up. You travel to a place called Ingrid's Tinctures. The door is locked though and a sign reads closed in the window. Um, are there any lights on inside? You know, there are.

You do see some candlelight, so it does look like somebody, somebody worst case scenario left a bunch of lights on that are fire. Well that's dangerous. We gotta go handle that. That's not okay. I'm gonna bang on the door. Quick, we need an autopsy! You bang on the door and after a moment this older giant woman with long sort of frizzy

gray hair pushed back by goggles and she's got like an apron on, like a leather apron and rubber gloves, comes over, opens the door, it takes her a while to get there, you guys are like banging for a while and she goes, oh, I'm sorry, we're closed. I think I just rushed in. Oh my god. Oh my god. I think I just rushed in. Oh my god. Oh my god. So old. Don't do that.

She's surprised. So you dash past her. This main room has all these bobbles and tinctures and everything on the wall. You run past them. There is a back door that looks like it leads into a basement or something. I think I hop up and Swing my weight on the door to open it and try to scramble down you Sorry, you hear her screaming out the doorway

You see people from the nearby tavern and stuff start to run towards the alchemists. Saul, you descend a dusty staircase to a basement laboratory. Bookshelves crammed with old tomes, tables with books and beakers. In the corner, under a dim lantern, you see Swag Daniels lying on an operating table. He's covered in a blanket, but you can see his gray, sickly face. I think I walk slowly over to him. I just try to see if there's anything left. As he does that, Calder and Callie you see Giants begin running up to help the alchemist. I put my hands up

I'm called her killed a gow is my brother the ranger general is my brother I'm with him. This is my friend and also the other one, but not I'm not with his decision though We're we're acquaintances with the other one but not I'm not with his decision though. If that makes sense We're we're acquaintances with the other guy You see Ingrid looks at you and goes called her little called her kill day Yes, go ahead and give me you see she does recognize you it takes her a moment But she does recognize you but she's upset and the other people are upset what's going on Ingrid go ahead and give me a persuasion check Calder I'll give you a bardic okay you can give him a help as well you're I'll give him a help action by launching into Calder the cold sir old sir. Um, okay. With Callie's Bardic and my persuasion, that is a 28. Nice.

A 28. Okay. Thank you. I went as ham as I could because I'm scared. Yeah. You see, everybody starts to back down. You know, everybody's jumpy because there were these creatures that just attacked the town But they don't know about like replicants or anything so they're not super

The average town folk right now does not know that they can like replicate people They just heard about these monsters that attacked the tower and whatnot So as soon as you raise your hand and say who you were you hear a gaffa from the back And goes huh, we're scared of smolder kill day. What's up smolder? and say who you were, you hear a gaffaw from the back and goes, huh, we're scared of Smolder, kill day, what's up Smolder? Not my name, nothing, no. Oh, it's so good to see you. Ingrid comes over and puts her hand on your shoulder.

Why, what, why, why did he do what he did? He ran into my house. He knew that my house. He knew that bully walk. I would have let you in. Totally. Yeah. I would have shown.

I think he's emotional. Okay. He knew, okay. Okay. He's sorry. I can tell you that. Well, yes, we should go down and make sure he doesn't do anything because they,

I think can spread There whatever is going on. I've been able to I've cast some spells on him to sort of keep him at bay and I Let's go down there and let's call out to him on our way and say don't touch the body So Saul meanwhile you are down here. They have held her off long enough. You begin to hear the steps coming down the stairs. Saul, as you go over to check on Swag, he suddenly jolts up from bed and grabs your arm.

He locks eyes with you, and Saul, you are once again locked into a strange trance with swag. You are back in this nightmare world, full of wires. You are safe up in the tree, but swag is struggling in the sea of wires that pull him down. He tries to get his face out and yells to you, muffled. She can't get to the ice knife yet. No one knows how to get there except the Ranger General.

She couldn't get Gowen, but she got Gregor. What? She got Gregor. No. She tried the forceful approach, but they sniffed her out. Gregor was easier to get because he's out in the tower. Now she's just using Gregor as an avatar

to get to mirror over Gowen tower now she's just using Gregor as an avatar to get to mirror our Gowen she's she's going to you see the wires pull him back under and saw you snap back to reality and that's where we'll end our session oh you fuck you absolute fuck it's been a minute since we've got to really really get a wamping in. A story a story wamping. A story wamping. A narrative wamping. And you know what for that sir I give you a little frog. Oh yeah. Great guys. And with that you can listen to us over in our Patreon. Talk about this, patreon.com. Slash, NAD pod that's N-E-D-D-P-O-D. Wee!

Don't sing it, don't do it. I won't. To listen to the short rest. In the meantime, does anybody else have anything they'd like to plug? I'll just ask another plug to shop.nadpod.com. Got new stuff coming. We got a fanny pack now.

Got some fresh stuff on the way. Got pins back in stock as well. So go check it out. Hostors from the most recent live shows, all gorgeous too. That's right, yeah. Usually IRL only, but now they're on the website. Hell yeah. So check them out.

Pretend like you're in a digital shopping store and you are walking around, floating with a shopping cart. Loading your cart. It's the cyberspace experience. Dude, the year 2000. Loading and loading. Check it out. And you can also subscribe to our show on Apple Plus.

If you prefer to listen to the short rest that way, just press the plus on your little podcast app to subscribe. You can also follow us on social media that we may or may not use at chmercemete.com, at Kaldi's Caldwell, at EX4Emily, and at Chick Roots' Jake. And you can tweet about the show using hashtag NADPOD, that's N-E-D-D-P-O-D. We are, we are, youth of the nations! We are, we are, youth of the nations! And now it's time to thank our benevolent Council of Elders, starting with Brad D,

Jeffrey S, Lord of the Fjord, Hugh C, Later McSkater, Matt M, Cutter W, Jeff C, Daniel G, Danielle D, Dastardly Dame, Beardman Dan, Danny P, Bryant J, Vincent W, Victor T, Balnor's Boy, Hoyt's Friend, Justin I, Danny Danster TJ, M, Trelai the Cray, Christopher B, Damiel R, Jordan L, Cyborg version of Josh V. Cobold, Stevie Wags, R.I.P, Squeam, He Died As He Lived, Without Context, Princess, Yarr, Jory S, Jack L, Nicholas C, star of every film ever made in Bahumia, now back in action after Union victory. Samuel B. Mike H. Alkasmelzer Plus, Great Value Gemma, Adam G. Tyler F. Neybadger, Panama James, Heradrian, Carver O. Chapel Hill, FPV,

Rex Thaniel, The White, Diana D.L. L. C.C. Lulu, Heraclil Poyroth, the Rabbit Folk Detective, Raco, Calder Cums Cold, Shout out to the Cold Cumb panions frosty facial my god Taylor be the vengeful one-winged angel cast skateboard cast Steven is Stephen T unevenly you see see Mike K lady taco and team in credulity joy T Jake L Nick W Agnity William W big, Big Bad Beardo, The Mad Anorama, Percival, Frederik

Stein von Musselklawowski, D-Rolo, The 3rd, J. Dragonborn, Mustard King, The Sandrayon, Ben A, Dave H, Christian S, A Cell from the Prison of Elders, Dustin S, Danny F, Hawkeye Pierce, Bookvars Assistant, Izzy F, DPC. is awesome. Sean, the Shade Tree mechanic of Zellbldar, Summer Rose G. Kat C., Mesa of House and Zunza, Ariel, the occasional mermaid, Selena N. A. K. A. Velacy Raptor, B. Perky Always, Pat L., Maxwell J., Lauren H., Nolani, the Coffee Breeze, the brewing fighter of Limpule and Bohumia, Serv 16, the bone duster, Annie the Feywild therapist. Skillful, ferret, Conor, Savage, Salil, weed, Goku, 69, aka Gunk at 16, experimenting with drugs. BioQuart 7, Amber Dextre, Sullivan, H. Jack H, King of the Mole People, under Iron Deep,

dressed in blue and fighting his way through a bracket style tournament. Lindsay W. Valen, Karlin C. Emily S. Noah the Bullywog Boy. Hashtag release the filthy guppy cut. James G. Everything Bego, the Eladrin who just wants to hang out with his pet badger Stripey. Daddy Master Dandy. Han the Green Teen. Eric B. Marcos learns the balance, Druid. Dakota J.P.

Frida M. Pago's self-proclaimed Faye King back on their regularly programmed Faye Shenanigans. Tracy P. the Crick Elf Librarian, Maggie S., Holly Hyena, Leah Giovanni, The Fighter, A-Cache Thakkar, Andrew Crick Plains Walker, Getting Cricky with it, Dufinius Russell, H, a monk named Dilgo,, the whole thing. Yes every time Cody care key chains Pentium 2 processor Lorelei the succubus and Kira her busty Queen Matt M your friendly neighborhood yant and yonkel Andrew and Sid John Adams the right-in candidate for 2024 My goodness Meg the male carrier manager of Bahumia James James F. Jimmy A. M4L, Austin S. Wayfarer now has to do something with the trolls, get rid of them, turn to page 42, keep them, turn to

page 69. Shane C. Barpo Goodbarrow Bard, Barry and Welsh Lander, Garrett G. One, Big Curt, Mr. D. Dana the Daisy, Ethan B. Havie the Half-Orch,ene the monster captain, Box Clifton, Olivia the enchanting bard who is working hard on her audition for the lead singer of the mounting crows, Winter Slade, Sammy B. Bahumia's finest linguist, Riley S. Fico, angry wheat, Garrett the artifice, or Anthony the raddest of dudes, Josh H. Abigail H. Caleb L. S. The fairies have been partying nonstop to celebrate hashtag CCC. We are hungover and resting and wishing the best of luck to y'all.

Cantrip Dumbledore the bare onesie wearing barbarian. Lexi H.M.J. The BFG. Cam the frog man. Artevious K. Geno T. Mama Belle. The Silver Serpent herself. Derek D. Tristan the talentless hunk. BTA workshop. Shannettigan'socanar, Mios the

Great, Alex K. Joshua S. Alexander, Lynn's W, Angel La Pamela, The Forever Vindicated, M.S. Redd, The Reforged, Warforged, Goat Token Fenton, Tim 69th, Simulacrum, Reporting from the Future, Ready to Destroy the World of Aurelion. Amazing! A catnapping in a sunbeam listening to a podcast. Also amazing. Nyax, nasty, nut. Alright. Shell B, Kenna's second favorite sprite girl, a level 12 circle of party druid with a one times a day pinata wild shape. Please don't smash her. Or's best friend Steve, Stephanie of House in Zunza, Jake's Rum in Shop, RIP Melchior, The Brave Lion and Warrior, who even cares about the rest of the party. Karjish, Benjamin A, Sacrificial Otaku, pen name for Kali's cousin who discovered anime

and is trying to spread the word all over Bahumia. Jiggy, Merlino, Mikkel A, Angie A, Josh H, Oh No, the Mechanical yak teams are fighting. Froki, Jacob K, Maple D, Shy, Bookworm, Ash, Lee, Seth E, Billy B, Tori, the dragoose, son of Thomas, the blind bisexual goose, bi-icon and father of 69, Cygnus, real goose, look him up. Okay, sock monkey, Bob, lovers call me Edel, foes call me wise, the party call me Edel-wise. Michael, LS2. Cobbersel Wise, Michael LS2, Cobbers Bobbers the Coblin Bobbin Goblin, Nova Cry, Parcel, Dex, Riddlewell, Hannah A, Ace Dregs, Highlord of Critsbury, and of course Joshua F. Thank you everybody.