Not Another D&D Podcast - C3 Ep. 62: Knight's Plight (A Faerie Tale Ending)

Episode Date: July 5, 2024

Duck Team faces tricks and trials on their path to the hidden village of Rousel! Callie makes her autumnal debut, Calder learns a new appreciation for art, and Sol uses innovative diplomacy tactics. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.Music / Sound Effects Include: “A Wizard’s Tournament” by Emily Axford."Tundra Trudge" by Emily Axford."The Whisperwood" by Emily Axford."Wooded Wonder" by Emily Axford."Balnor the Brave" by Emily Axford."Court of the Bear Prince" by Emily Axford."The Mindflayer's Lair" by Emily Axford."The Witch's Hut" by Emily Axford."Greenshade" by Emily Axford."Left is Left and Right is Center" by Emily Axford."Lucanus Aer'Tea" by Emily Axford."Gladeholm" by Emily Axford."Eye of Akarot" by Emily Axford."The Red Fen" by Emily Axford."Sultan of Stone" by Emily Axford."Hospitably Hostile" by Emily Axford."All I Need is One Thread to Spin a Web" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. Welcome to the Campaign After the Campaign. This is not another D&D podcast. Welcome back to Bohemia, everybody. Bohemia. I'm your Dungeon Master Brian Murphy, joined by Jake Hurwitz. Friends with a bard and a monk who is rock hard. Calder Gilded.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Then, of course, we've got Emily Axford. Closer to death after my dance with Lady Elspeth. Calliope Petrarchal. Yeah, but that went about as well as it could have gone. Yeah. Things could only mildly devastating. I'm feeling good. Things could only mildly devastating.

I'm feeling good. Things could have been pretty dicey. And then of course we've got Coldwell Tanner. Our bullfrog, he don't know anything about the fey. He got stoned, saw a boo foe. I wish that we could set him free without Cali's life blood being drained. I know what song that is for reference to. So do I.

Two for two. You got stoned. But I don't want to know. You got stoned. Why am I having a hard time thinking about it? Flavor of the Week by American Hi-Fi. Oh yeah, American Hi-Fi. Yeah, that's right.

I know why Otz hits. So everyone just go and pause, give that song a listen, be like, that's pretty yeah, American Hi-Fi. Yeah, yeah, that's right. I know why aughts, hits. So everyone just go and pause, give that song a listen, be like, that's pretty good, and then come back. It's pretty alright. Yeah. It's pretty alright. It's pretty fun. It's a good song.

Yeah. I have too much time on my hands. Apparently. I know that song. Alright, let's go ahead and do a little recap. So last time, you partied in the village of the Ice Knife where Gowan announced that he was stepping down as Ranger General and nominated Gregor as his replacement. After a speech that was mostly a fart joke about Calder, he accepted the position.

You played Flipkeg against the Kildays. Shockingly, Albin rolled two nat 20s in a row to best Gawain as the anchor. From there things got sloppy, but Saul snuck off to find Fuldar of the Frozen Fist. The Frost Orc reported that, sadly, Swag had passed, but left Saul a vial of his spores. Saul took a sniff and was transported to an endless swamp where a Constellation Swag would serve as a divine guide. From there you guys continued partying until you passed out. The next morning, you were approached by Ma Goblin, who took you to her lab and showed news of an attack in Marengate and a breach of the southern planar gate. You spoke with Gerashe and confirmed that, even without Alexandrite, the automatons are still on

autopilot and attempting to secure a fae crown to bring the network back online. Without a central computer telling them what to do, it is unclear what their future holds. Callie suggested the party travel to Rassel, a moving town for fugitives and runaways, to get a better grip on the goings on in the fae wild. Saul used his divination with Swag, who provided a star map to the moving village. You said goodbye to your friends and family, then headed for the rift in the sky. Immediately, upon landing in the spring court of the Feywild, Saul accidentally made eye

contact with the basilisk and was turned to stone. It's like page one of the tourist book I really should have said don't make eye contact with basilisk. It really is a Fairy tale like yeah, the bad thing usually happens on page one just right away Kali spoke to a grackle which I learned was a thing thing. I didn't know what a Grackle was, but now I know. Thank you. Thank you, see you. And they're great, and we love them. We love Grackles.

The Grackle led you to a witch known as Lady Hellsbeth for help. The witch said she'd need life energy to cast a Greater Restoration spell, and Kali obliged. After siphoning some life and upping Kali's first death save and crit failure DC by one. Saul was cured of his petrification, you stepped through the archway of the witch's hut and her home disappeared, and that's where we are now.

Ugh. Wow. Well, I feel like that weren't about as good as it could have gone. Yeah. So. Are you feeling okay, Miss Petrichor? I feel like that went about as good as it could have gone. Yeah. So. Are you feeling okay, Miss Petricor? I feel great. Honestly, I went in there and I said,

I'm going to just trust in me and I can handle whatever she throws at me. And it ended up being true. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it looks great. Saul brushes away the wilting petals on Kathy. I snooze up grave dust. Sorry allergies, I think.

God bless you. Oh God bless you. All the gods bless you. So you guys find yourself in an open patch of forest. The hut is nowhere in sight. There is a warm spring breeze, glowing wisps in the air, and an orange sunrise peeking out through ancient overgrown trees.

But you know now that there is a lot of danger out here, more so than would appear at first glance. So I was just punching every reptile he sees. Yeah, half-eyed it. You knock one over that flips around and looks at you in the eye. Don't look at that lizard. It's wearing a top hat, I can't help it. You know what, you know what,

can I try to fashion little sunglasses for all of us to prevent any sort of future eye contact? We literally need to wear blinders. Yeah, I wanna take some flower dye to make some sunglasses opaque. Okay, great. Or less see through, sorry. Okay, cool. Yeah, you make some sunglasses so that you can,

I'll say maybe you can do a dexterity saving throw now to turn away from basilisks. It'll give you a moment, because apparently there's a lot of basilisks around here. It louts you with them. You see a tail of one going by climbing over another log. It's just a tail, just a tail. It's infested.

Just a tail. It's everywhere. Can you look at the tail? What's the tail gonna do? Is the tail a snake? I heard about that. You just keep your eyes shut. Honestly, there didn't used to be this many.

I feel like I saw one the entire time I lived here for like 20 years. Migration patterns, I don't know. So here's how this is going to work. You guys have this map that you were able to draw from the star chart that Swag put together for you. You do need to, in order to kind of stay on track, you need to find some sort of like bigger landmarks you can orient yourself based on what you see on the map. So I'll say one thing you notice on the map as you look at it is there is a large lake with like a

waterfall that leads to a river that you can follow for a while before getting to the town. So that's the next kind of big thing you want to find is this lake. So in order for you to find that, you'll need to make a couple nature or survival checks. Based on how you do, you will have to roll consaving throws to see how far you can get in a day. I have a question. Can I turn on my divine sense? Because I know this is the Feywild. Any body of water is swarming with nymphs. So I'm like keeping an eye out, I'm trying to sense for the presence of a gaggle of nymphs.

Right on, okay. So you're on nymph watch. Just like that. I never stopped being. She just, I called her, I think Callie needs to get laid. Yeah, I got that last night. She's not giving up. She didn't sleep it off.

Whoever's sort of taking the lead on the map can give me a nature or survival check. And you'll want to kind of load this person up because it's a DC 25 to get through like half a day of hiking without taking on any exhaustion. Okay. I have neither of those, but I'm from here. So I'll just, whoever, I'll give it a help action by just. I've got good nature. Great, yeah. Somewhat ironically, my survival is plus nine. Okay. Wow, so yeah, soul's the man.

Okay. So Kenna will once again, like she did in the Frigid North, walk along with you with the map and give you a Squire inspiration. Okay. So a D4 on top of that. I'll give you a Squire inspiration. Okay. A D4 on top of that. I'll give you a bardic inspiration. Great. Oh, okay. And in doing so, I'll be like, so basically, like any body of water is just like a group of mean catty nymphs. Okay. Is there gossiping.

Are they made of water or do they just live in the water? I, they're watery. Okay. But I think they're, I think they just gather around. Okay. But I think they're, I think they just gather around. It's unclear. Do they, and are they gonna like try to kill us or just like, you know? They're just gonna say really mean stuff about us. Oh.

A whisper, but loud enough that we hear. That's equally bad, honestly. Yeah, yeah. I missed a basilisk. You feel one crawl over your feet. Nevermind. So they're just gonna murmur unpleasant trees. Got it. Okay, so I've got the D8 for bardic.

Yeah, great. And then a D4 from Kenny's head. Yeah. Awesome. Saul thinks back to his water park days where he had to really keep his head on a swivel to stay alive and stay fed. And he swivels his head more than any human can because he has weird bones. Whoa. So it's like almost owl-like in the way that he's just like kind of rotating it around in like a perfect circle.

You guys do hear weird cracks as he does that. I don't know if you're supposed to be that much of a frog's little complete 180. When you do that to me, that actually sounds really relieving. Head on the swivel. It's gonna be an 11 on the die. Solid. So that's a 20? Yeah, that's a be an 11 on the die. Solid.

So that's a 20? Yeah, that's a 20. Okay. So 21. Okay. And a four! 25! So 25.

Wow. Wow. No exhaustion for this first leg of the journey. So, you guys go along. Basilisk! Fairy! Going around just punching random things. Cockatrice!

Ah! Don't punch that one! Also, don't look that in the eye! Just a bunch of things that would turn you to stone, you just keep dodging at exactly the right moment. I can't begin to tell you how many statue gardens we have in the Feywild. Just run up to a Medusa and say, fuck off! Get going. Just run up to him and do so and say fuck off Get going so after traveling for the morning you guys have a pretty pleasant hike You guys feel like you can keep going for a while the next check will be harder because you will eventually get exhausted

But at least for now you feel like you could keep going all day. This is really pleasant Yeah, I called her cuts the sleeves off of his jacket, so he's just kind of like in a vest. Wow. Oh. Yeah. What if it gets cold, Mr. Killday? I imagine Sol can sew these back on. I thought you'd never ask.

I put them in my pack for later. You see, Kenna just takes off her jacket and puts it in the pack. Interesting. I feel like we all could have just did that. Too late. It's all ripses. So after traveling for the morning,

you see the sun has risen fully into the sky. It's now the afternoon. You hear strange birds squawking in the sky, possibly some cockatrice and things like that. You hear some critters chittering. Everybody go ahead and give me perception checks. Oh, nice. Ooh.

24. 13. 22. I'm not doing a good job perceiving. I'm just pointing out things that have changed marginally. Like that Grove used to be a Grotto. That Glen used to be a Dell. Ha, no way.

Calder takes a picture of some mind to live each. That's like completely unhelpful for something. What about the Taco Bell? Was it always a Taco Bell? It was a Ruby Tuesday. Weird. I know. What even is that?

You see two dryads with their arms crossed looking at the grotto going like, it was cooler when it was a Glen. I agree. Right? looking at the grotto going like, it was cooler when it was a Glen. I agree. Right? That's the only Glen we were like. So you all hear up ahead the sound of crackling fire. Sounds like a controlled fire.

And with a high enough perception check, you guys got higher than a 20, you peek through the trees and see an unattended, looks like a campfire in the middle of a small clearing of trees. You see that there is no pit, no wood, nothing that should have started or stopped the fire here. And after a moment you see glowing white eyes appear in the middle of the fire as it looks like it's kind of straining to move or something, but it can't, and it has not clocked you yet. Um...

Ah. I report that to Callie. Yeah, uh, magic friends, right? What are we, what are we sensing here? Yeah. Um, can I detect magic? Yeah. You sense that this is a magical construct like an elemental.

Oh. It's an elemental. Does it look trapped? Does it look like it's stuck in there? I feel incredibly charmed by it. This is why I'm such a fucking easy mark here. And I think I just want to go over to it. I'll walk up really slowly. As you start walking up.

I kind of throw a rock at it. You throw a rock at the elemental. I start to walk up being like, you're going to be my new best friend. And then I'm like, this is a bad idea. And I throw a rock at it. You throw a rock. You see the fire, almost like you threw a bit of oil

on it or something. It kind of blows out and gets like bigger and you hear whoa what's up with your rocks why have you attacked me you see the two glowing eyes turn and look at you who are you my name is summer the the Autumn Aladrin? Yes, this has already been established. Right. I sensed a kindred spirit because I, being an Autumn Aladrin, am drawn to bonfires and the dancing around them. And it's so strange here in the spring.

And I just wanted to get close to you and warm my hands. Huh. Well, I am no mere fire, I am a soldier of the Empire! Oh! Are you? I've heard of them. Have you? Yes, I've heard that it is a great wondrous empire helmed by Charbin. I am Lord Charbin to you. I am Lord Charbin the high ember Lord Charbin hi you Lord Charbin yes

and to me and to you I've heard great things about him I've I was really hoping he would set up in the autumn courts where I'm from he's not set up in the autumn court where has he set up you're making it smoky in here when you do that. More, way too more of you. It's the peanut gallery. It's all coming up from behind the bushes. Greetings. Hello, yes, my name is... All hail the Empire.

All hail the Empire. Lord Charbon. Oh, good, okay. So some allies of the Empire, okay. Finally, a little respect around here. A toasty greeting to you. I've just been seeing basilisks and whatnot. Had I not had immunity to turning to stone, I would have turned to stone by now. Oh my gosh,

this sounds so bad. Yes, yes. Well, I don't know exactly where the High Ember Lord has set up. I just know I'm getting a strong calling to the West. I have awakened from a 10,000 year slumber so that I might answer the call, but I am I'm stuck here. You're stuck. The West is the Winter Court. We acknowledge no courts. Yes. It is all the domain of the Empire. Nor do I. The Western domain of the Empire. Yeah, yeah. You said you were you said you were stuck. Yes. Um, of course. Brightly. You said you were stuck? Yes. Um, where are you stuck? Right here?

Okay, well, this is my head, and I have a full body. Oh, right on. But the head is a lot heavier, and I was able to somehow get it through the ground, and then it sort of, the dirt collapsed. I see, so the rest of you is below where you are. Yes. Yes. So the rest of you is below where you are. Yes. I was in sort of the molten core of the earth

and I arose and I got really tired when I got to the top and then I took a little rest when my head was out and the dirt kind of came together. I think there might have been like a group of fairies or squirrels or something that came by and kicked some dirt on me while I was sleeping. Aw, how rude. Awful.

Awful. Well, I am in autumn elatrine and we're very good at harvesting. Shall I dig you out? Great idea, Summer. Summer the autumn elatrine, okay, yeah. Interesting. Shall I dig you out? Yes, of course.

For the Empire. Is the rest of you very dig you out? Yes, of course, for the Empire. Is the rest of you very fiery as well? Yes. Great. Clypie's gonna, Clypie doesn't actually have a plan for this. Oh. Clypie's just gonna start with her hands.

Just start digging. Wait, he said you had a plan. Clypie, you reach over. I look at Calder and Saul with panic in my eyes. You go to touch him, you instantly take 39 damage. I was just digging the dirt! I was just digging dirt! Just kidding. Okay, if you go to dig at the dirt, that'll just be half damage. So you'll take 19 damage

Ground is really hot. You all served the Empire. Come on The floor is full. Not all who serve the Empire are blessed with its gifts. Actually, yes, you do look strange for followers of the Empire I'm usually used to a bunch of fire elementals and fire giants and whatnot. Yeah. I know, I create unseen servant to dig. Okay. Hey. All right.

You go over, you create an unseen servant. Oh, it has an AC of 10, one AC. Okay. Don't worry everyone, I've got this all figured out. You see the outline of an unseen servant gives a thumbs up to Callie and then walks in. You just see smoke as it evaporates as it gets to close the fire.

Good job, chap. Kenna, do we still have those fire suits that we got in Mal'scurial? Yeah, we could. That would give us resistance to it. Okay. Yeah, that's good. We should put those on the unseen servant.

It's too late, so. It's hard to tell when they die. Yeah, Kenna breaks out the fire suit. That's a great idea. Okay. Yeah, I'll don a fire suit. We're gonna put on our cleric's robes so we might worship the flame. Yeah.

I'm not sure what sect of the empire religion this is, but you've been asleep for 10 the empire religion this is, but. You've been asleep for 10,000 years. Thank you. True, true. That Glen used to be a dell. Yeah, can you believe it? Or was the grotto a Glen?

It was the grove was a grotto. Maybe Glen was a dell, I'm not sure. Okay, well I'm mad about it, no matter what. Sure. I swear that tree was a shrub. Yeah. I remember this all just being ash and dead trees. That sounds so much cooler. Right? Things with best. Okay, yes. Put on your cleric robes and

get me out of here. Okay. Okay, so Calder, you have the fire suit on. I just looked at my inventory. It kind of looks like I have have I don't even have a shovel But I'll I'll go and start digging with my hands as well great you go to start digging with your hands Just like this just like this Summer you mean yeah, I wasn't talking to I was talking to the basilisk behind her. Ah! Goliath bee. Come here.

Your pet? Yes. You called her roll a logic to not look at the basilisk. You're committing to this? Only on a one you'll look at the basilisk. Thank god I got a four. OK. You actually do see a basilisk as you tell that lie.

Jesus, they really are everywhere. Summer. Stop messing around. Okay. So you go to start digging him out. You have resistance, but you're still going to take some damage. I mean, you take half damage.

So I'm gonna say, if you're not interacting with him directly, you're just digging near his body. Yeah. It's going to take twice as long. OK. And you're still going to take some damage. OK? All right.

So you take 16 damage. OK. As you begin digging, go ahead and give me a strength check. All right. I'm also going to use Stone's Endurance. OK. Soul Style. And I'll shrug off 11 of that damage.

Right on. Soul's Endurance. 23. 23. 23. Woo. You make positive progress. You do feel that this being is so hot. I mean, just being, when you were in Malscurial, it was incredibly hot there, but that was

from being near like in the vicinity of like lava and stuff like that. This is an actual being of fire. You're touching pure fire essentially. So you continue to dig through. However, first you are going to take 19 damage. Jesus. As you continue digging through, go ahead and give me another strength check. Nat 20. Nat 20.

Okay. I'm going to say on that, that'll count as two positive checks. So you really, you feel it heating up, you feel it getting even hotter, and you just continue to scramble through and claw at the ground. Okay, I'll take a shift. I'll take a shift.

And actually, and as I go back, can I cast Ray of Frost on the ground near, near, did we get this guy's name? No. No. No, we were just helping around. What's your name, sir? We told you, Summer, did we get this guy's name? No, no, we're just helping. What's your name, sir? We told you summer. I'm, I'm Dan. Yes.

And I'm turtle the frog. Turtle the frog. Oh, that's good. Well, yeah, interesting. My name, weirdly, my name is also Dan. You don't beat a lot of Dan. I don't know why you guys are twin flames. Quite literally.

Uh, okay. Actually, you know what? I'm going to cast Dan that crazy. I don't feel like you guys are twin flame. Quite literally. Actually, you know what? I'm gonna cast Frostbite. Okay. I cause numbing frost to form on one creature. Oh, can I do that on the train? I'll let you do it to sort of ease it for Callie a little bit so you make it colder, but you hear Dan the fire element goes

oh sorry so sorry I heretic no I was making sure you were on the level get over here you see tries to wiggle his way out yeah Dan to Dan I need to make sure you were on the level. And now I know that you are. You're a good Dan. Give me a deception check. Oh, I have a minus one to Charisma. That's a five.

Liar, heretic. Okay. See, eyes get super angry as his flame head continues to grow. I'm gonna take a lap. I'm gonna take a long lap. Yeah, why don't you walk your basilisk? It really sounds like I'm saying something else. Summer looks like she needs to piss.

I mean, Calliope looks like she needs to piss. What? The names are getting all... I suck at this guy. Calliope. I do need to piss. Okay. You guys are the theater kids. Okay, so I'm going to piss. Okay. You guys are the theater kids.

Okay, so I'm going to get in there. Okay, go ahead. Callie, you take 16 damage. Okay. Give me strike check. 11. You fail to pull him out. You just take more damage.

I think I got an idea. So I was just going to chuck a grenade in the hole. Okay. See if I can like blow him out excavate him sure okay? Yeah, I hear you know sorry about my friend and that frosty snack. Here's a little something to warm you up I just toss a grenade in there, okay Let me see if that is fire damage. I think it is. I thought it was forced damage. I was looking at oh it's forced damage That's not good. Oh, that's not good. I wanted to fire

Definitely wanted to be fired. Yeah I think. Definitely wanted to be fire damage. Yeah. It is piercing damage. Oh! Oh no. I thought it was fire. So you throw a grenade into this hole to try to help this dude. Bon appétit!

It blows up. You see it leaves behind a huge hole and in it is this dude's full fire elemental body. He's the size of like a large humanoid, like a Goliath or something like that, but he's like pretty skinny and has almost looks like armored, like charred bits of lava, it looks like. And you see he's hit by a bunch of the explosion and screams.

Ah! Oh, heretics! Heretics! Oh, I thought you liked that. Everybody go ahead and roll in the tree. Dan! You thought he would like getting hit with a grenade? No! It's fire!

You saw, I totally saw where you were coming from. That's six for Calder. 25 for Clive. My brain was rocks five minutes ago yeah your brain is still rocks okay that's just rude Dan 25 first act is salt because always happens we're up against large fiery opponents made a great enemy this day the Empire will not rest until you are burning how important we think. How important do we think this guy is? I feel like, I don't know if the Ember Lord

is gonna miss him. I know, okay. But our alliance with the Empire might be really important. Ah, true. I have a plan, but we might as well stop attacking him in case it doesn't work. All right, I guess it seems unlikely, but I'm gonna try and stunning strike him.

That's a 30. A 30, I guess it seems unlikely, but I'm gonna try and stunning strike him. That's a 30. A 30 definitely hits. Second attack, 24. 24 also hits. Let me see, he might be able to be, weirdly enough, elementals can be stunned. Weirdly can be stunned. Okay, so he'll do a con saving throw.

It's a 17, I believe. He gets a 17, so he does pass the first one. All right, I'll do another one. Okay. 19 passes the first one. All right, I'll do another one. Okay. Ah! 19, pass the second one. Ah! Okay.

Ah! You pop him twice and he does react, just like a dude getting jabbed. Sorry. Ah! All right, I wanna deescalate, I'm gonna go for two more. How was it? Deescalate!

Deescalate! At least stun him so he can run away. You also take three damage of fire from hitting him. It's okay, it's okay. It's not a bad thing to do some damage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. How is that not a bad thing?

How is that not a bad thing? You're gonna find out. Am I? Am I? You're gonna find out. You're escalating this damage. I've escalated nothing! Yeah, clearly Turtle the Frog is trying to de-escalate. Turtle the Frog is the second worst of you.

The first worst is this guy over here. Dan? Dan, apparently. Dan the Man. Turtle over here casting ice spells. Yeah, just to make sure you were in the level, I said. I thought you'd like a tasty grenade. I don't even know what that is.

Two more attacks. Oh fuck. Shout out to the two crew. That's a 14 and a 19. Both hit. Oh, okay. You just think I made a fire, but you do take 15 damage from coming into contact with him.

Okay. And then I will do, I'll try to do two more stunning strikes. Okay I'm rolling so amazing no 17 a pass I'll roll a new d20 to see if I fail I rolled a natural 17 I'm not even using a screen Jake just saw both rolls I'm just he's rolling well keep on trying that stunning thing it's going to work he's justeral. I'm going to destroy you. I'm remembering this face. I'm going to send it to everyone else in the Empire. Don't do that. Don't do that.

Yes, I feel the great call. The great call. Dan, we need to calm down. Charmans. We need to talk about this. I'm repeatedly stabbing him in the jugular. We need to talk about this. Go ahead and do your damage.

Ah, that's 51 damage. You beat the shit out of this fire elemental. Yeah, you you punch through him and you see chunks of the lava and fire begin dissipating from him begin like disappearing and you see steam as if you've just thrown water or started to put out a fire suffocated. you've just thrown water or started to put out a fire, suffocated the spell that was cast on Gawain. Okay. And I have in my most recent level up, taken Modify Memory.

And I'm gonna try to cast Modify Memory on this guy. And I'm going to say to him, what has actually happened, S, we were letting you out, we were freeing you. And as that happened, a great rainstorm came along threatening your life, and we shielded your body from the rain, even though some of it got through, and we chased away the clouds, and as we did,

we broke you free, and the whispers of the Emberlord calling to you said, there will be ace. A heart of mel ladron named Summer, a turtle named Frog, I mean a frog named Turtle, and a man named Dan. They will come along you and it will be in the interest of the Empire to help them in their journey. Yes, yes, and the bruises are from hail.

That will be what the last 10 minutes was if he hails. On a natural nine. I think he has advantage for fighting. He got an 11 on the second one, which is not good enough to pass. Great. You see, Callie, as you cast this spell, he suddenly. My voice is coming out in the ash of that spell that I found.

Yeah. You guys are in a little bit of a clearing because there was this fire here, right? So he like burned up a little bit of like the canopy above. So he looks up as if there's like a rainstorm. Oh, friends, it is as prophesied. And he holds his arms together and he goes, the great storm. You've saved me. You saved me from the storm. Summer, the autumn of later. Yes, yes, that's right.

The turtle, the frog. Well met, friend. Dan, as prophesized. How do you do, Dan? That was really close there as we were saving you and the rainstorm came along. After 10,000 years to surface and then to be extinguished by a rain,

that would be a great injustice against the Empire. We couldn't have allowed that, Dan. Take it easy, friend. Here, eat this twig. It will replenish you. Thank you. You see, bites into the twig, that is Dan eats twig. Starts eating the twig and does get bigger.

It does look like some of the smoke that was coming off turns into actual flames and he begins like growing. I'm gonna go gather a bunch of twigs. Yeah. You keep doing it, he keeps getting bigger and bigger. Okay, that's a bad one. Thank you, yes, I will feast someday on this entire forest.

This only lasts for a short time. Oh, okay. So, anyways... So as prophesized, you have saved me, and so now I owe you a debt and I must help you. Really? That's so nice, I wasn't gonna ask. Yes, I would honor the great Emperor Lord Jarvan. Okay! I have a life debt to you to help you.

Basically, what we need is like a great gust in the direction of the lake. A great gust, okay. I don't have any kind of wind powers. I could burn down- I could start a fire in the forest. That's okay. That's fine. Not necessary. Do you just know where the lake is? Yeah, so I know of a cliffside nearby that if you were able to follow in that direction you see he points to like the northwest you should be able to get a good bearing on your surroundings there's a lookout where we'll be able to see most of the area okay great we're like super in a hurry so I'm just gonna run away as was prophesied you would be

in a hurry yeah you would show up would be rain, my head would get stuck, you would pull me out. Is this grenade shrapnel? Where did that come from? Oh yeah, it was raining grenades. It's a meteor. Yeah, that's where they call those clouds, thunderheads. I think it was sorry, I think it was also prophesied that you would give us money.

Right, okay. Like a us money. Right. Okay. Like a thousand each. A thousand each. It's like whatever money you have on your person. Okay, yes. Let me go through here. Wow. Yes, ten thousand Empire Sparks. There you go.

Thank you. It hands you a long dead currency. Boiling hot to the top. How, how, how? Okay, great. You know what? There's got to be like an eccentric coin collector in Rossell.

That's actually a good call. Maybe an airport with an exchange machine. I love that. Okay, it was so good to meet you, Dan. Excellent to meet you. It was prophesied. The fates brought us together. Long live the empire. Yeah, burn bright, baby. Long live it. It was prophesied. The fates brought us together. Long live the Empire.

Yeah, burn bright, baby. Long live the Empire, indeed. You see he just starts walking ominously, strictly west. Oh, poor. Ciao, Dan. Okay, that was weird. I mean, we could try to attack him now if you want him to do that. Oh, no, I think that this is-

Do we want to finish the job? Mmm, this seems good, like, cause you know, he's probably going to report back. How long is that spell going to last for actually? Oh, no, I think it lasts. I'm removed permanently. Eliminate all memory of the event. Oh, good. Yeah. OK. Perfect. Yeah. You guys are going to get off scoffery. Great. I

call anything. We've started like a really cool story. These three people that we aren't. This is kind of like Benny Jesserich. Okay. Okay. Let's go to the cliff. All right, let's go to the cliff's edge and get a look out.

Can we actually take a short rest because I got really fucked up. Oh, yeah. I would love to roll hit. That was literally hot. Okay. So take a little time to do a short rest. Go ahead and for the next half of the day, as we near sunset, go ahead and give me another nature

or survival check. This one will be harder to do without any kind of constitution check. You guys are gonna start to get tired, obviously. Okay. I'll give you a bardic. Great, bardic, and then do I get advantage? Yeah, and D4 on the side.

People can give you help, yeah. All right. And Kenna is reading the map, gives you a squire inspiration. Cool. Kenna, could you just like slather me in ointment? I got so burned back there. Yeah.

Okay, that's a, oh, natural one on that die. It's gonna toss that out and use the 12 instead. So that becomes a 21. Okay. And then one on the Squire die. So we're at 22 and then a five on the bardic. So 27. 27, okay.

Everybody give me DC 13 constitution saving throws. All right. Got it. 14. Hell yeah. I also got a 14. Okay, I got a 21. Constitution saving throws all right Got it I also got a 14 okay. I got a 21. I've still got a stone left in me And it passes as well, so everybody's going along I think you guys are kind of heartened by the progress that you're making in the times that you're not Getting into weird fights or arguments with weird monsters. It is very nice. Yeah Yeah. See, it's beautiful. It's really pleasant.

I called her Crop's the vest. So now it's kind of like a crop top vest. I feel like, again, you could have tied that up. Yeah, but it's kind of, you know. Yeah, it's true. Tie would have been, that would have been good. I had this, I had these to solve it. I got it.

Let me know, I will happily be your tailor. Just try to remember exactly how this jacket looked before. Guys, I thought that this was just residual petrification, but I'm pretty sure I have a kidney stone. Oh no, we need a roller coaster. That'll break it up? Yeah, apparently. Okay, really?

Yeah, and there are actually a decent amount of roller coasters in a fair while, so it shouldn't be too, can I scan the horizon right now for a roller coaster? Yeah, you hear far off sounds, clanking of an old wooden rollercoaster. Oh, that one's so dangerous, you'll love it. It's perfect. You hear screams and stuff, but you automatically realize that those are sirens trying to get you to come onto the rollercoaster.

Oh, okay. And they're gonna make you ride the rollercoaster for like a few years, Yeah. And you just think it was a few minutes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that like a Six Flags Witch Light thing? Yeah, it's exactly that. Yeah, there's a lot of enchanted to witch. Cursed Six Flags. Cursed Six Flags. It's really the only kind.

Yeah, true. Yeah. Okay, so you guys continue hiking through the woods and feel the trail begin to incline. You guys are on like an upward hike. Now you climb a beautiful mountain path. You see giant dire goats, frolicking effortlessly near you. You see beautiful glowing wisps constantly trying to lead you off the edge. I almost go half the time.

Oh look, I can catch a wisp. Finally, you guys around a corner where Dan told you to go and you come upon a strange site. This is where the mountain path ends and there should be an overlook nearby and an area for you to kind of descend down further into the woods, but everybody go ahead and give me perception checks.

Hmm. Dirty 20 again. Okay, 14. 18. Dirty 20 again. Okay. 14. 18. You guys look ahead and you see that there is a threshold where the overlook, instead of looking like the rest of the landscape, it kind of looks like an aerial painting of an overlook.

There's like an illusion of depth, kind of like Wile E. Coyote style. You see a painting, like an oil painting of a mountain path leading to a cliff's edge, but the view is covered by bushes and trees. The sky and scenery has a strange oil painting quality to it, and you can actually see like little brushstrokes. I've learned a lot from Callie. I'll throw a rock at it. I was going to do the same. You throw a rock and you see that as the rock hits the threshold, it becomes a painted rock

and follows the normal kind of rules of gravity. You throw it about 30, 40 feet. It makes it about halfway to the bushes. So you guess that it's about 100 feet to those bushes and it becomes a part of the painting. It rolls forward and stops and then stays there in the painting. Albin told me about like illusory terrain and stuff like that, but this seems different than that. Can I use Divine Sense just to see if it's there's anything celestial fiend, good, evil. I know that's not really the code here, but just to like make sure.

Or if it's the hollow spell. It looks like it's just some fey magic. So it looks like some kind of trickster thing or like a pixie or a fairy might have cast this magic. You see it is not illusory terrain because Kenna walks over, goes to kind of like the edge of the cliff's face and looks around it and pokes her head around and then looks back and goes, the cliff isn't there on the other side. If we don't go through the painting, it looks like we almost like fast travel to the bottom of the mountain and we're amongst the trees again.

Wow. It's like a portal? She shrugs. She gestures for you to come over. You go check the other side and it looks like a painting from the side, like a canvas, only inch or so wide. And on the other side of it is more nondescript forest, much like when you left the witch's hut, it's like you're just transported to another area of the forest and kind of would have a hard time getting your bearings. Do I like the painting? Yeah, it's nice as hell. It's really good. I know. OK, so yeah.

OK. I took like a moment to see that it wasn't real. I'm going to stick my hand in. Just my hand. Okay. Callie, you stick your hand in. My prettiest hand. Okay. You stick in your right hand. My gorgeous, tempting little right hand. She's having a really good hand day.

Callie, as you stick your hand in, you guys see that Callali's arm appears painted and you see little like brush strokes on it. Oh, the painting did a great job with that. You're still able to move it around, but go ahead and give me a constitution saving throw. Okay, that is say 11. Kali, you feel the paint begin to dry and harden. And it feels like you're going to be stuck in there, but you do feel like you could pull it out right now.

Okay, I pull it out. You pull it out and your arm feels fine. You see that there is some like residual paint there though. Okay, this is clearly a trap, but it's beautiful. Is there any way we can like roll this up and like sell it later? Let's try to roll it up. Let's try to take it out of its frame. You go to touch it, hand goes through it. Give me a constitution saving throw. Okay that's a 21. You're good. Hand goes in, hand comes out. All right. Okay. So let's not touch it. Okay. Don't touch it. I'm good constitution. I'll touch it. Well, that's a try. 27. Cool. Calder, you, I'll say put your hand in and even put

your head in and stuff. And you see that 100 feet down. If you get through those bushes, you can get a lay of the land. And that's the only way to see off the side of this cliff here. But you have to take a risk. Oh, so you have to go through. You have to roll initiative, take turns, potentially become part of the painting or a friend might have to come in here

and save you or something. Okay. You feel yourself able to resist the paint drying. But when you're in there, gravity feels the same, you're moving. if you resist this thing, you can move. Okay, I'm feeling hearty after this hike. All right. I can go down and get a lay of the land.

You guys just keep an eye on it. And if I stop moving, then something's gone horribly wrong. Should we tie a rope to you so we can pull you back? Okay. Yeah. Yeah, great. Okay. Yeah, you guys tie a rope to Calder. Calder, go ahead and roll initiative. 12. Wait, Yeah. Great. Okay. Yeah.

You guys tie a rope to Calder. Calder, go ahead and roll initiative. Twelve. Wait, Calder, hold on. Saul rips your pants so they're jorts now. Thank you. That way that if you get stuck in the painting, you'll be frozen in jorts forever. Yeah.

Before you leave, oh, Saul, you're up against a painter. You need inspiration. And I'll give you a bardic. Thank you're up against a painter. You need inspiration. And I'll give you a bardic. Thank you. Do we have paint thinner? I know. Calder. Right.

You rush into this painting. You're gonna take a dash action. Do you have any other ways of getting movement? 100 feet to get to this bunch of bushes. Yeah, I'll cast, just before I leave, I'll cast Expeditious Retreat. Yeah. Okay, Rad.

You act before the effects of the painting do at initiative 12. You guys see Calder runs in and you see this little painted Calder begin to run in the distance. It looks like he's just running ahead, but you see like little brush strokes. Calder, you're inside.

You see all this painted stuff around you, but as you're running, you see it starts to look more and more real, which is perhaps a little bit concerning. You get closer and closer. You get within 10 feet of the bushes and begin to feel your body hardening up as the paint begins to dry. Go ahead and give me a constitution saving throw.

All right. Shout out to the two crew. No. I will use indomitable. Okay. And I will use a saving throw. All right. Shout out to the two crew. No! I will use indomitable. Okay. And we'll go with saving throw. You guys see Calder in the jorts does like a leap towards the bush. No!

His jorts got snagged on a shrub! You see his ass crack hanging out a bit as he gets caught on a tree branch and begins to, against gravity, looks like he's moving slowly, like the paint is drying in the picture. Don't let them remember me like this. The ass crack is lovingly rendered though.

That is only a 13. Okay. I'll roll my bardic. 16. Calder, because of the bardic inspiration, you pass. I can't even, I cut my jorts. The pure fear of embarrassment and being remembered like this causes you to grab your pants, you pull them up,

you feel the paint kind of break off of you as you feel your limbs free again. And that is your turn. I'm going to say it's going to take an action for you to interact with the bushes and stuff. So that's going to take away one dash action. Okay. Um, but you easily have enough room.

You go 10 feet, you push through these bushes and you see on the other side, you get a perfect lay of the land. You see a bunch of forest. You remember looking at the map and you find this giant lake with the waterfall. You are now able to kind of like orient where you guys are. You I'll say you poked around and looked at where you were going to be spit out when you go past the painting and are able to see where that is in the base. You find like a familiar rock formation that you saw on the other side of this painting.

You see where that is. You see where the lake is. You now feel confident that you'll be able to point out where that you saw on the other side of this painting. You see where that is. You see where the lake is. You now feel confident that you'll be able to point out where you guys are on the map and get there. All right. Remember where the mist is rising from the waterfall. Yep. OK. And so that took you 10 feet. You have 60 feet left.

Can I do a small object interaction and cut my boots into sandals before I head back? You see Calder's boots harden and become part of the painting. Alright, now sprint back. You sprint back, go ahead and give me another Constitution saving throw. There we go, that's a 25. Okay, Calder is all good, on the next turn he blasts out of the painting. You see covered in paint, but is able to move all of on the next turn. He blasts out of the painting. You see covered in paint, but is able to move all of his joints and everything.

Just covered in wet, wet paint. You guys weren't looking at my ass, were you? They did it in one bro stroke. I don't know how it was possible. Yeah. We were just looking at the painting. It was very tasteful. Tasteful nude?

It was a tasteful nude, okay. Yeah, well when it's art. Yeah, that's excusable. All right, I give. What is a tasteful nude, okay. Yeah, well when it's art, it's yeah. That's excusable. All right, I give them the lay of the land that I saw. Great, yep. Hey everybody, it's Emily here to talk to you about Mint Mobile.

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bearings you guys are able to travel towards this lake and towards this waterfall. Go ahead and give me another nature survival check. This one, once again, it's going to get even harder to not get exhausted. This one, I'm going to give you a bardic inspiration by just talking about how cool Hex Flags is. Hex Flags! And there is a Medusa roller coaster there. Whoa. Instead of taking your photo, does it turn you to stone? Yeah. Do they take you down to like hell on some of the like the mud flubes and stuff? There is a Medusa roller coaster there. Whoa. Instead of taking your photo, does it turn you to stone?

Yeah. Do they take you down to like hell on some of like the live clubs and stuff? Yeah, they absolutely do. It's so fun and like everything, like all the food tastes so good, but it also binds you to be there for the rest of your life. Whoa.

Oh my gosh. Yeah, it's really fun. Does this apply if you get the lightning pass or does that mean you get struck by lightning? You get struck by lightning, but also get onto the rides quicker. That's awesome. Yeah, because everyone feels bad for you

for getting struck by lightning. Yeah. So worth it. We gotta go. I know, I'm really thinking about it. All right, here we go. Gonna roll it. 32.

Wow. Yeah. Another DC 13 con save. Aye, aye, aye. Uh oh. 11 for Goliathie. Okay. I also got an 11.

Everybody takes a level of exhaustion. So disadvantage on checks. Oh, I think I just like, baby, need a trip to Hexfly. This is really nice. Yeah. I'm feeling homesick for it. I feel like it's a damn. I'm just trying to get a picture with Snoopy.

I'm feeling hex-sosted. That's what you say when you need to go to Hex-Sax. It's absolutely wild that they got the rice to the peanuts gang. They bound them in a contract. Saul, who is Snoopy? Yeah, who is Snoopy? Tell me of this beast. I've not heard of him. I'm trying to recall anything more, just the word came to me,

but I can't see anything beyond that. It's been a long day. The fae has sort of perforated with other worlds, so you know, maybe something is jumping from another world. Maybe it's some sort of like, I don't know, some sort of cat. Yeah, that sounds right. Anyways, I'm gonna take a nap. Yeah, maybe it's some sort of like, I don't know, some sort of cat. Yeah, that sounds right.

Anyways, I'm going to take a nap. Great, yeah. So with your nature check and stuff, you guys make positive progress. So you're just tired now. You can decide if you want to keep pushing through or you can stop. But eventually you get to an area of the woods

where there's a little bit of like an unpleasant mist in the air. Everybody give me perception checks. Eight. Nine. Misty 20. All of you hear the sound of like a far off waterfall so you know that you're in the right direction.

Okay. Saul, you clock that the kind of fog that's gathering around that might be like a mist that you'd get if you were near like a source of water. There's something like poisonous in the air. Like this is kind of corrupted or something. I stopped detect poison. Let me try detect poison.

You can also identify the kind of poison, poisonous creature or disease in each case. Okay. Yeah, Saul breathes. I knew we were coming to the paywall. Right on creature or disease in each case. Hmm. Okay. Yeah. I knew we were coming to the paywall. Yeah. Right on. Saul breathes it in. I'm immune to poison. So he just goes, yep, that's poison. I'll tell you what kind.

Okay. Kali, you do detect poison. And this is an unusual case. This is something that you probably wouldn't normally find on a material plane. This is, and I'll say, you're using a little bit of your Paladin sense as well. You sense almost like a reverse, like corrupted aura that has tainted this water source and affected the surrounding area. I mean, I feel like exhausted, like if we're exhausted, we're going to be doing everything with disadvantage.

So we're just going to. So I feel like we're going to be setting up camp here. So can I go to the water source and start casting purify food and drink on it? Yes. As you start to get near the waterfall, you see that the fog is getting heavier and heavier. Would you like to proceed? It is beginning to get difficult to breathe. Okay, I think I can. So I didn't identify what type of poison it is though. There is a hint of wyvern poison in there, but it seems magically enhanced. It does not just seem like a...

There's something going on. There's like a curse slash aura slash hint of wyvern poison does not just seem like a wyvern like poison to this area. Do you want me to try to sniff it out? Yeah, you can just like walk into it. Yeah. Unaffected. Should we tie a rope to you?

Yeah, that looks fun when they get it to you. Yeah, I loved it. Great. Okay. Thanks, Dan. Saul, do you want to do a stealth check or anything or do you want to just walk up to the waterfall? I'll try a stealth check, but or do you want to just walk up to the waterfall? Um, I'll try a stealth check, but it's going to be with this advantage.

Yes, because I'm tie tie. Uh, 14. Okay, so you sneak through the woods pretty quietly, but you're getting tired. So your feet are falling a little bit heavier than they might otherwise. But you make your way through thick, thick thick kind of like yellowy green fog that you could tell you can I'll say that there's almost like a taste to the poison that isn't fully affecting you, but you could tell that this would really fuck somebody else up if they did not have immunity to poison.

So you get closer to the sound of the waterfall, push past some trees and some foliage and find a lake with stinking yellow-green water and a foul waterfall that is creating this mist. And from the lake you see strange poisonous like water weirds and elementals are forming and kind of just stalking around the lake. But they are elementals. They do not have high passive perception. They have not clocked you. Okay. Are there any nymphs?

You do not see any nymphs. You get the sense that anything near here would die. You get the sense that animals and stuff would get the fuck out of here. That's crazy because usually they gather like stray cats. I don't hear any gossip. Yeah. Does it seem like the poison is coming from like the top of the waterfall? You can't tell that right now. You could get closer to it and do perception checks and

whatnot, but for right now you're kind of at the base of this waterfall here. Okay. So there's probably something corrupting up top. And I know that we're not on a mission here to set everything right and not everything weird in the Feywild is wrong and needs to be, but I feel like there's something corrupting up there.

We just get bit of it. Yeah, it's like, I don't like what the nymphs say about me, but I like seeing them chilling in the pools. Yes. It just feels like part of the scenery, it feels right. Yes, yes. I will say that if you guys can't uncorrupt the water, you can't follow the river.

Oh, okay, okay. So, yeah. All right, well, I guess I can try and like climb up, I can just walk up the side. Yeah. Do you want me to sprint up and then like throw a rope down? So we can get to the top of this waterfall? Well, these guys, I'm allowing you guys,

I'm allowing you guys to talk like a little bit, assuming that like Saul kind of went back and reported. These guys are gonna have to do concept because they get close. They are not immune to poison. What about those water breavers? Can I put that in? This is not water, this is poison in the water.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is, water, this is poison in the water. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is, you can go near it, you just might have to take some damage or get poisoned. And we're exhausted. Do you want me to take one more stab at surveying, running up and seeing what's up there? Yeah, go for it. Alright, okay. So I'll say, we'll use your same stealth check to approach it, but you'll need to do one more stealth check if you wanna like climb up the waterfall.

Great, okay, okay. Roll in with disadvantage. I gotta beat a 10. These elementals just base 10. Shout out to the two crew. Yikes. Oh no. I'm gonna use my bardic.

Okay. But I gotta roll an eight on it, I guess. That's an eight! Oh my god! I felt as good as Critic. Wow. I think about Snoopy. Maybe he's an octopus?

I don't know. Yeah, that would make sense. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Snooping around the ocean floor. Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Saul, you just basically walk right up the waterfall. You see there's like rocks next to it, a little cliff face and an area where it gets to like higher ground and then there's a river that feeds the waterfall you get up there and you sense the poison even heavier up here go ahead and give me a perception check as you get to the top okay whoo spicy disadvantage on this oh Oh, fuck. Not one. Not one. Yep. You, uh, see that the poison is pretty severe up here, and you

can tell that there's something stuck in the rocks that is likely the cause of it. You see, that's where a lot of the elementals and stuff are bursting out of. But you can't kind of see beyond it at the moment. So I'm stuck in the rocks up here, okay.

It's like under the water. Right. This didn't work the first time, but I do have another grenade. Okay. We're all tired. We need to get a good night's sleep. We got to solve this problem.

I chuck a grenade into the water. Chucking rocks, chucking grenades. Go ahead and roll initiative. Okay. You guys hear an explosion in the distance. Heads up! Should I yank the rope? Was that one of our grenades? They have a certain timbre to them.

I think that was my last grenade. That is a 12 on initiative. So, you throw the grenade in, there's a huge explosion, you see a bunch of rocks and bits fly off and Saul you see body parts fly up. What? From like up on. What? You see a bunch of these strange like water weird poisonous water elementals hop out of the river and start taking swings on you. Gah! First one. I'm helping you! First one misses. Okay. Second one hits on its second attack.

15 damage. Nice, okay. Third one misses one but hits one. 19 damage. Okay. Oh no. And a fourth elemental hits on one attack. 17 damage.

So that's 51 damage total? Yeah. Wow. Okay, Saul, that is your turn. There's a lot of these guys. I'm gonna try and lure them back so we can all attack them. So I am going to jump off the waterfall, try to land to the side, not in the water.

I can reduce my damage by 60 from this fall. And then I'm just gonna head back to where Calder and Calli are. Okay, I'm cranking on the rope as I feel it go really slack. Okay, it's coming back. Saul, you are faster than these water elementals can move, but they still pursue you.

And as they run chasing after Saul, you guys give me constitution saving throws because the whole fog begins moving with the corruption. Oh, I got it. 17. Okay. 13. Okay. Calder, you immediately begin retching and cannot use an action. You just begin doubling over.

Oh, I'm going to puke. Calder, not right now. Save it for hex flags. Do I take any damage or I just can't? You just don't have actions. Actually, go ahead and both of you guys roll initiative and Kenna will roll initiative as well. Okay. God, I cannot roll.

Seven. Okay. 16. Guys, I figured out what was poisoning the water. What was it? What was it? What was it? These things, I guess, I don't know.

Oh, okay. I thought those things were into the poison. They were the byproducts of the poison. Oh, okay. Well, I saw like some limbs. Some limbs? Yeah, I thought it was like poisonous beavers or something, so I tried to blow up the dam. So I guess I don't know what caused it.

Is Snoopy a beaver? That sounds right, too. Yeah. Callie, that is your turn. Okay. Let me, you know what? I'm going to hop on Licorice. Hmm.

Licorice, take us to the top of that waterfall. Okay, so the good news is, Saul has lured a bunch of them away. So as you get closer, Callie, this is essentially like a stinking cloud effect. So if you hold your breath and you feel your eyes begin to tear and it is difficult to see, but you and Licorice begin flying towards the corrupted lake

and you feel it actually as the water weirds and stuff begin like exiting, there is a little bit less of this corruption in the area. But go ahead and give me a perception check as you arrive by the riverside. I got a 17 and an 18 so we'll go with the 17 becomes 21. Wow. Okay. Kelly, you see that as some of the water elementals have left and a lot of the water is displaced, you see floating at the bottom of the waterfall, having been broken free

by the grenade, there is the floating body of a halfling. Really? Okay. I'm going to go down and I'm going to lay on hands onto the halfling. Go ahead and give me a constitution saving throw as you get into the water. There is a little bit left that hasn't been displaced by these water elementals. That's a nine. Okay, Callie, you take 26 poison damage

and you are poisoned. But you are able to get up to this halfling and I'll say you even, you grab him and you pull him to the shore to the side of the lake here you see that water elementals more of these poison guys begin coming out walking out of the lake like strange swamp monsters and walking towards you but you're gonna put your hand on this dude and lay on hands him even as the swarming it's like there's like an umbrella of them swarming, but I'm gonna start giving him mouth to mouth chest compressions and then I want to lay on hands

to try to cure a disease or neutralize a poison. Mouth to mouth, she's finally getting some sort of. Okay, Callie. So you see that this halfling has died, was already killed. You see that there are arrow marks in his back. It does look like they broke off the back of the arrows and it looks like somebody like stole his armor

and weapons and stuff. You get the sense that he was a paladin and this is a corrupted aura that has come off of him. And as you use your Lay on Hands on him, you see that his face goes from this pained, kind of like, tortured look to looking more at ease. And the curse breaks.

You see his aura returns to normal. You see the water weirds and the water elementals break down, break into puddles and join the lake and you hear the fresh water once again falling. Calder, you recover. I think I threw up. As I hold him in my arms, is he from the Feywild or is he from the Material Plane? Does it feel like someone from here or did they get lost and this was just a tragic fate for them?

You look at him and- Oh, he's a halfling and I know that Queen Cirilla employs the Green Knights. Yeah, so you look at him and you see that he's wearing something called like a gambeson, which is what you wear under like plate mail. So it looks like somebody might have stolen his armor. But you see a sigil on the undershirt that is a sun that is a symbol of the Green Knights

of the Summer Court. A combination of the sort of Sealy Court seal and the god Pelor, which is who they worship on the material plane. Do I remember how, what sort of like, I mean, because like the green knights protect Queen Zerilla, so I've seen them as a presence. Do I know what their funerary rites are like or anything? I would say, yeah, I would say that you know, and you know that a lot of people in the Feywild would do like a

Natural burial so that they can become part of the earth and the green Knights are very much in line with that are very Much the same. Okay, then I'm gonna I'm also gonna look for any kind of like signifying like a name or like a dog tag or Yeah, you look on I can bring to his troops or family you find a tag on the shirt that says true hair that seems to be like the family name like the last name t-r-u-h-a-r-e hair like rabbit and I'll say Calder and Saul you guys after kind of being chased around by these poison elementals find Callie holding this halfling who has passed and was shot in the back with

arrows. Yeah. What do the wounds look like? Is there any kind of like distinctive like, oh, this was a volley of magical arrows or this is like, are there any arrowheads left by? Yeah, the arrowheads are still in his back as you take them out. They are poison arrows. Looks like it was some kind of like wyvern poison. And he's coming up from the summer court?

Yeah, so this is, it's, they're called like the green knights and I don't really know much other than you know, Queen T'rila employs them to keep her safe from, you know, so it feels like if someone's going to go off to a green knight, it's because they're also going after the summer court. But isn't, is he far from home right now? Spring court is close enough to the summer court. You would think he is either they are. So the green nights originally traveled here 200 years ago in campaign one.

And there are a lot of green nights that served as like the royal guard of the summer court. So they would typically be in the summer court, even though the spring court is their like jurisdiction. So him being this far away does mean he's either a long way from home or Queen Cirilla is here for some reason. Oh my. Well I guess I do you think that these arrows cause like a curse like this or? It feels like the Feywild often sort of takes our feelings It feels like the Feywild often sort of takes our feelings and makes them realer.

So it feels like this is just a representation of sort of someone being stabbed in the back. Oh. But I mean, like, is it, did this poison, was this like the intended effect or is this kind of just a metaphorical? You get a sense that this is some Feywild bullshit of like the paladin's aura was corrupted

because he was murdered in the lake here. Kind of like Havoc, this like the remnants of his spirit kind of got cursed and maligned. Yeah, but I wonder why because Queen T'rila really doesn't even leave her court that much. She's like kind of a party girl. Interesting. She looks the portie? A portie girl, really. She's a portie-er. Yeah. She looks like a party girl. Yeah. Nordy party. Her and Lester Bourne just like host big lavish garden parties and there's all these gossip rags about who's

which ladies and lords are fucking which ladies and lords and they tell you who's fucking like writing the newspaper. Well I mean it's it's a gossip infer. Yeah. If you're seen with some- It's salacious tidbits, you know? If they're just partying and stuff, why would anyone wanna murder anyone in her guard? That's what I'm wondering. She seems so inoffensive. Maybe that's a cover. That would be so fucking badass of her.

I mean, she's clearly got enemies, right? Every one of us. I mean, she's clearly got enemies, right? Every royal must. I mean, I think that her and Jovier, like Jovier's her youngest sister, so I think that there's like maybe some tension there. Not projecting onto it, younger sister. But I feel like because Cirilla is so sort of like a party girl,

Jovier's never really considered her a threat. Would they be on the move because of Alexandrite's minions entering their court or something? Oh, that could be. Wyvern poison, do I remember anything in the fair wild about like, this Wyverns are lousy in this location? You do- Like basilisks up here. Yeah, I like basilisks.

You see another basilisk come by. Oh, shit. You would think that somebody that was able to get a hold of, like, distilled any kind of, like, dragon or wyvern poison or somebody would probably need to be like somebody associated with one of the courts or something or like a dangerous assassin. It's expensive. It's not it's not something that just a random band courts or something, or like a dangerous assassin, it's expensive. It's not something that just a random bandit or random like pixie or something is gonna have.

Okay, this is when we go to Rassel, we need to speak with the poison dealers, the alchemists, because they might have peddled this. Okay. All right. Should we hang on to these arrows? I can hold it, because I don't think it'll affect me. Yeah, yeah, I'll give you the poison arrows. Don't lick it, just perform.

There's no reason to. It's kind of got a nice taste, you know? Spicy. Man, it was in his back. Yeah, I think then I just kind of like perform like as respectful as I can, like a little burial. Do you have another grenade? We'll do the old fashioned way then. I do feel bad for blowing up this already dead person.

It's okay. It's honestly in a Feywild, it's kind of like expected. Interesting. It's really desegrated. You were just doing some exploratory demo. Yeah, yeah. You know, I just, there's been enough unknown threats. I thought I'd just try to get ahead of one.

Yeah. Ah, all right. Do you want to say any words for the true heirs? I think I'll play a little song that's like a ballad of an old green knight that I heard. And I'll play that in his honor. But that would be the most I would maybe know. Like that would be like the most respectful I could try to be.

Calder does a very somber jig. Yeah. And I'm just sitting there being like, I really hope this isn't like some sort of like family enmity or anything. Yeah I croak along with a funeral dirge. You guys sing a little song for this halfling and you bury him under the shade of a tree here And you see that very quickly the dirt that you guys had just like dug up begins to very quickly Grow grass and then sprouts a little garden of flowers You see a little hair, a little rabbit, bounces over and begins sniffing some of the flowers.

Hey, little guy. That's his spirit in the flowers. Wow, it's really, the magic is just overflowing here, huh? Well, I know it seems somber, but shall we set up a hut near this grave? It's got a beautiful view. Yeah. Teating with bunnies.

Yeah. That's how you do it. I will say that as you go to set up camp for the night, normally I would have you guys roll encounter checks. But I'm going to say you feel protected by this paladin's aura. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Great. I think he got where he needed to go. I can feel it. Yeah, I've got his information. So if we see the summer court, which maybe we will, maybe we'll go to a garden party. Whoa. God.

Turtle the frog at a garden party? Dan needs to see and be seen. It's gonna be the summer court of Dan. Who can I canoodle with? If we could get a blurb in Miltred's murmurs, I would die. Dan spotted on the Dan's floor? Everybody in the article would just be called Dan's floor. Yeah, so good.

We should get jobs. Callie, you set up the Leomund's tiny hut. What does it look like here? I'm gonna make it look like a little witch's hut because I'm a little autumn Aladdin right now. Oh. This is much cozier than Elsbeth's. Instead of chicken legs,

like instead of a hut on chicken legs, in honor of the sky, I'll make that look like hair feet. Like little rabbit feet. A lucky rabbit's foot. Yeah. A lucky rabbit's foot. Yeah, a lucky rabbit's foot. Great. You guys stay in this absolutely cursed house.

And then inside, it's all like Nightmare Before Christmas paraphernalia. Oh, very cool. Oh my god, it's so cool. The chairs are so twisted. Look at this spiral painting on the marble. This is interesting. Don't touch it.

Okay. The moon's so big. Yeah, is there anything you guys would like to do as you get ready for bed here? I'm feeling pretty beat, yeah. We're exhausted. Cool, you guys all get ready to go to bed and you do see as you guys are preparing food

and you're preparing dinner and stuff, I'll say you have a cauldron keeping it on the witch theme and everything, you guys make a nice stew and begin passing it out. And Kenna is kind of eating at her soup and goes, okay, so if that greed knight was a protector of one of the queens, Queen Zerilla. But at some point we're gonna have to like get her crown, right? Otherwise those giants are gonna get really mad at us. Yeah. I'm like kind of hoping that maybe we could get it from her while she's partying,

sort of steal it from her. Oh, do the heist, crowd heist. Or perhaps we could even go to her and be like, hey, the fate of the Feywild rests on you giving up your crown. And then while we're telling her that, we're distracting her, Exactly.

And then you're sneaking backstage and getting the crown. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She could abdicate and spend her life partying. Yeah. It's true. It's not bad. Yeah, I think we gotta like get up in there and kinda suss out like what her motive is.

Yeah. Yeah, I don't know enough about her to know what it would be. But yeah, her soldiers could easily become our enemies. Yeah, I mean the only green knight I know about is the hero Beverly Togold. Who's the hero? I mean, you know, the launchpad they teach you as a hero. Oh, right. Here we're just like, oh, they picked all those sunflowers

and then it caused chaos with the giants. They did like a lot of good stuff for the most part. Cool. Cool. Yeah, they were all right. Yeah. Okay. I liked Hard One. He's really different than I heard. I didn't get a chance to interact with him. But anyway, like, you know, if these Green Knights are trained like different than I heard. I didn't get a chance to interact with them. But anyway, like, you know, if these green knights are trained like

Beverly, the hero was and we'd have our work cut out for us trying to fight them to get to the crown. Yeah. We're all just sitting on the ground with bowls of stew, just like having a stew slumber party.

Notting off. Getting really sleepier and sleepier. Yeah, I mean, I guess, but we just kind of keep going up against things we shouldn't be able to. So isn't that sort of what we have to do? Yeah. Yeah, well. She's drowning.

She's drowning. We've got to get a read on this situation. We'll find out more. I just want to keep her promise. Let's get to sleep. Let's get to her a break. Let's get to sleep. Let's get to sleep. You guys go to sleep for the night and nothing

disturbs you. You guys feel protected by this aura and you wake up the next day to another beautiful sunrise. Damn. Should I cut these jorts shorter? You could go another inch for sure. Really? Damn, should I cut these jorts shorter? Is that crazy? You could go another inch for sure.

Really? I could really dance in these. Sweet, go ahead and give me a new nature or survival check as you guys begin your hike for day two. All right. I'm gonna give you a bardic by describing the concession stand at Hexflags. That also inspires Kenna somehow.

What is a funnel cake? I'm going to get a rot dog. That sounds awesome. Oh, that's really good. Okay, let's see here. 27. 27 passes, easy, breezy. Yeah.

Now that you have uncorrupted the waterfall you've uncorrupted the river So you're able to follow it you follow this river that weaves through the forest you see beautiful elk and other majestic creatures coming By to take a sip Eventually you guys get to a point where you would divert from the water's path and head to do west and as you do You get to a small wooden bridge that will lead you to the other side of the river but out in front of it you see a huge spilled bag of gold. Okay this is such a fucking trap I throw a rock at it. You throw a rock at it and go ahead and give me a perception check.

Oh, 22. Okay. The coins aren't a projection or anything. You hit them. There's definitely like a clang and a bunch of them disperse. But with that high of a perception check, you see a couple of them kind of hop and like make themselves flip. Okay, Callie, like no disrespect to your home, but like how do you get stuff done here?

We don't. Okay. I'm starting to see that. Like we daydream, we navel gaze, we wander around, we don't get stuff done. Okay, it's just- If you want to get stuff done, you go to the autumn court where Queen Jovier has put really a fucking lid on the hijinks and pranks. Okay, see that even seems worse than this.

Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Okay, um, so we got Hoppin' Coins. Is it a mimic? You don't know, you just threw a rock at it, and it did seem to have like a little reaction to it. You saw like a couple of the coins flipped in a way that was kind of angry. Unseen Serpent, go collect the coins.

Okay. OK. You see how many firebucks we could get for those. The unseen servant walks over. I tie a rope to it. Unseen serpent. The unseen serpent. You tie a rope to the snake? Yeah.

You tie a rope to the snake, goes over, goes to pick up a coin. You see a flash as the serpent turns into a gold coin and you see a golden troll goes thanks assholes and then starts running away just starts sprinting away those are all guys all the coins are guys you see they all hop excitedly the gold troll just books it into the woods come back here I taste him!

Okay, everybody go ahead and roll initiative. Okay! 25! 820! Okay. Is this a spell he cast? What's going on? I don't know, but I'm going to attack him.

Are those his children? I think it's like, victims. Did he shift that gold out? I was the gold, but then someone touched it and I passed the curse to them and now I'm outta here. Okay. Oh, actually an unseen servant is really good, a really good placeholder for this curse. Yeah, so this guy was a victim himself.

Okay. Okay, all right, okay. But you're gold, I don't know if I totally believe it It's okay, so the troll Fucking books it and sprints the troll gets 80 feet sprinting away Okay, but Cali you are first to act in the initial half on licorice's back And then I ride side by side and I say I don't get it Did you do this curse or was this curse done to you? The curse was done to me!

Who did it to you? Lady Hell's Beth! What did you what was the what did you ask for? He's running and you're just next to him on licorice hovering. Yeah. Okay there was this whole thing I was doing like a troll toll in order to cross the bridge you got to pay the toll and she said cross the bridge, you gotta pay the toll. And she said, do you really want me to pay the toll?

And I said, give me some gold. You tried to get Lady Hell's Pet to give you a toll. I didn't know she was Lady Hell's Pet. I just thought she was some lady. Oh, you are. And she said, if you love gold so much, you can become gold. And she turned me into gold.

Okay, you're released from my aisle. Okay, great, yeah. You were riding alongside him. I turn around. You just do a quick turn. I do a quick turn. I give Kelly a thumbs up or a thumbs down. Is he, is he, is he gold?

I think he's fine. Yeah. Neutral, okay. Yeah, I didn't feel like chasing him anyway. Was he gold the whole time or was that part of the punishment? Lady Elspeth did it to him. Oh.

Yeah. Checks out. but he also was a gold troll yeah he was a troll tolling people for gold wait hold on I'm gonna run over there and ask him real quick hey are you always gold or is this part of the punishment? I am a gold troll I demand gold I'm also the color gold but I was not a gold piece until the curse hit me I gotcha okay have. Have a great day. You too. What's your name?

Gold Troll. Gold Troll, you know what? Well, you know what? You're more than your job. Thank you. Right? You should have a name outside of your job. All right.

Have you ever thought about Dan? I actually have, I was gonna say Dan. I am. All right, I'll see you around. Shut up and Dan. Okay. Stay golden, Dan. Shut up and Dan with me. The gold and Dan. Shut up and Dan with me.

The gold troll runs off. He was nice. I liked him. He was great. I mean, I don't really have an opinion on these trolls. They're going to be there. I feel like, you know what, this is probably the wrong lesson to learn, but could we scoop up this gold and use it as a trap for someone else?

That's a really good idea. I wonder if I can, I don't think I can make two, no, because anyone who tries to scoop it up will become the gold. Okay. Do we have any kind of like anti-magic device? Oh, that's interesting. He left the gold here? The, no, the unseen serpent became the gold. Oh, I see. Became one gold piece. Right. There's more. And they're all there oh really yeah I'll use a when I pick up a stick and I'm gonna poke one of the gold coins you see Saul turns into a gold another gold troll. But still a Dan, but still a Dan. You see the gold troll runs off.

I chase him, I chase him, I chase him. He's 80 feet away. I'm on Ligurus! You're having too much fun with this. Halle, that is your turn at the top of the order. We'll keep the same initiative. Okay, I ride up next to him. How do we get our friend to not be a piece of gold?

I'll never switch back! I'll ride up next to him How do we get our friend to not be a piece of gold? I'll never switch back! What? I'll never switch back! Fuck it, I'm gonna try to I'm gonna try to grab the finish ring I'm tired of being objects Go ahead and give me the contested strength back

Can I do it with advantage because I'm riding the crush? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, he got a 23. I got a 21. Okay, he just face bombs you and stiff arms you off of licorice. The Heisman trophy. Keeps running off.

After Callie's turn, that is Saul's turn. Saul, you have negative five to all stats, but you may use an action to flip yourself gladly sir okay am i am i heads or tails right now your heads right now okay so it flip if you can hear me I flip you see other coins begin flipping as well are you all guys okay okay flip if you're a guy and flip if you're are with Flip if you're a guy and flip if you're wait flip if you're a troll No one flips

Can I just try to cast dispel magic on this pile of gold because it was an action to try to grapple him He's gonna try to get away He goes another 80 feet on his turn into the woods. So he's 160 feet away from Calder. Calder, that is your turn. I don't know if we're- Where is Mr. Moon? Is he a coin forever now? We don't know, Kenna.

He might be. Why did anyone touch the gold? What if I show the gold coin to a basilisk? No, because you'll touch it. You have to touch it. Okay. I'm not gonna touch it. I'm not even gonna go near.

We don't even need this troll. We just need something it. Okay. Not gonna touch it. I'm not even gonna go near. We don't even need this troll. We just need something else. Okay. Can I grab a fish from the river? A fish? I was gonna grab a fish, toss the fish onto the core. The fish here are incredibly intelligent.

Okay, is there a little, like a crab? The crabs here are even smarter. What? Hello, good sir. Where the fuck are we? You see a little crab with a top hat comes out of the water? You're impeccably dressed. Indeed. Ah, felled for the old gold troll till.

Not me. Not me, my friend did. Interesting. Yes, you find yourself in quite a conundrum. Wise crab, I take a knee. Wise crab, what is your name? Daniel. Sir, an excellent name for an excellent man.

Thank you. Daniel, how could we get my friend? Well unfortunately, he'll have to switch places with the original troll. Oh no. Oh, it has to be the original. Well I believe that each one of those coins are individual different trolls. I see. Jesus.

Do you remember which one your friend was? Otherwise you might have to go through and free each one, but then also catch them so they become the coins again. Okay, I think I didn't lose track of Saul. Saul, flip away from the other coins. I look back at the gold coins. Hey, I'll start flipping until they start trying to make stuff.

Flip if you're Saul. Flip if you're Saul. Caldo in real life is flipping a coin. That's what that sound is. This is all I can do. Okay. I'll say that you do have an eye on which one is Saul. Yeah. Can we say that it has like a little etching of my face? Yeah. You're starting to like flip away from the other ones, but the other coins are trying to catch him. Okay. Good Lord. All right.

Kenna, Kenna, you're on Saul. You're on catch him. Okay. Good Lord. All right. Can I, can I, you're on, you're on soul watch. Okay. You do have honeysuckle here. Okay. I'm I'll hop on. I'm going to hop on honeysuckle. Okay. You can get 120 feet. Okay. It gets with you within 40 feet of this troll who's still booking it just on all fours, just going through the forest. If I'm within 40 feet, could I cast Misty Step? As a bonus action.

As a bonus action, and then try to grapple. Use your movement attack, yeah. Yeah. Okay, so you're gonna try to grapple him, great. Okay, so you Misty Step over, you get right next to this troll, you jump up and you try to form tackle him. That's only an eight.

Not gonna do it. He stiff arms you, keeps running. By a neck dude. Calder fails to grapple him. That's Kenna's turn. Kenna's gonna go over and God, she knows that she can't touch the coins with anything, but just tries to really keeps an eye on Saul.

Spray paint him. Kenna, Kenna, I want you to spin me on shorter jorts for Calder. I'm absolutely not touching anything. I'm not even talking to you, Mr. Buffau. Gotta stop throwing grenades at stuff. Gotta stop touching things. You gotta stop falling for all the tricks, Mr. Buffau.

She just looks at the one coin and like she's doing like one of those puzzles where you put like the ball under the cup and follow it. She's just following where the coin is. So she's deadlocked on Mr. Buffau coin. That is top of the order Callie's turn. You are still pretty close to this troll. Okay, I'm just gonna try to attack him though. Great, okay, you fly up with licorice. That is a 22 for the first. Hits. Okay. That is a 27 for the second

it's oh my god 28 for the last okay okay I'm just gonna do what you fucking device my you made this happen I'm just doing my thing but you did it to our friend I didn't do anything he touched I didn't do anything! He touched the coin! Kenna, you gotta agree, I touched you with a stick. That shouldn't count, right? That's by the treads of property, I don't know. What are the tr- 99 damage.

Amazing. And my AC is now 22. You see, Callie just runs up and brutally stabs this troll a bunch of times My AC is now 22. Kali just runs up and brutally stabs this troll a bunch of times and he just explodes into gold dust. Saul appears back as himself. Kali, you see as he explodes into gold dust, gathers back together and turns into a coin again and flops on the forest floor here

and then begins flipping towards you. Run, run, run! Run, run, run! You guys all take off, Kenna pulls you away from the other coin saw. Thank you, Kenna. And you guys all rush across the bridge. Oh, sorry, I've got expensive taste.

No, it's okay. I mean, that's sort of the fun of the Feywild is like touch everything and, it's OK. I mean, that's sort of the fun of the Feywild is like touch everything and regret it. I'm beginning to see that. Yeah. What happens here stays here, especially if you turn into a gold coin. Yeah, yeah.

What happens to the Fey stays in the Fey. Yeah. It's Vegas. So that was halfway through your day. Interesting morning, to say the least. Go ahead and give me a survival check. Can we just eat lunch? Quick picnic.

Yeah. I'm going to cast purify food and drink on anything we find or forage. Yeah. You go, you find some food. You pick some berries and whatnot, purify food and water. As you're picking fruit from a bush, you see a basilisk is trying to grab some fruit. Seriously, no. I'm trying to look into my eye.

You are so full of shit. I'm not falling for that. Not again. I football kicked the basilisk. You guys have a little picnic and go ahead and give me another survival check for your next. Another bardic for you. Not sure if I deserve it, but.

29. Cool. Go ahead and give me DC 11 Constitution saving throw. Okay. Come on. There we go. 18. That's a dirty 20.

Cool. 19. All of you pass. Everybody's good. Nice uneventful walk after the very eventful beginning to it guys is one of my teeth gold no there is a tiny rock in your mouth that's corn do you want it to be because we're in a place that lies work more okay I don't know what I want anymore. So you guys continue along the forest path, you

guys are now walking away from the river. This almost looks like this bridge may have led into Roussel at some point because you know that the town can't, doesn't teleport that far, doesn't teleport like hundreds of miles away, It just generally stays in this forest. It just keeps moving. OK. But as you guys make your way to where you know Roussel to be, you see off the path amongst the trees, there is a broken down house. It is a small cottage with a damaged thatched roof

that has caved in from a tree branch that has fallen from above it. It's covered in moss and the structure itself is made of stone, but it looks like it's been abandoned. Everybody go ahead and give me perception checks. Not one. Shout out to the two crew. Eleven.

Guys kind of can't get a read on it. I will say looking at it, it looks suspect in that it's kind of at this point, pretty far away from the river, like a water source. It's got like an uneven foundation under it. It doesn't look like a good place for someone to have built their home. Uh, it's essentially suspect because it's here at all. Yeah.

Yeah. Does it look like an abandoned witch's hut? Because I know that my family squatted in one for a short time. It looks decidedly not witchly. In fact, it looks, it looks a little cookie cutter. Like it looks like it would just be part of a town or something. I'm kind of in favor of just putting our feet

one in front of the other and keep walking. What's for me? Okay, yeah. I shield my eyes to the side of the path that the house is on. I will throw a rock. Okay. Kelly, you throw a rock.

It hits the doorway. As the rock hits it, the door very easily cracks open and falls over. It looks like this had already been kicked in. It looks like somebody had gone in this house. And there's no you're not sensing anything with your paladin senses. There is no magic or illusory magic here. I'll just I'll be I'll just walk in.

Okay, go ahead. Let me tie a rope to you. Go ahead and give me a perception or an investigation check as you enter. Shout out to the two crew. Okay. Boy, I'm glad we decided to give that one a skip. Right guys? Guys? Uh, Cal, you enter this ramshackle cottage and see that it has mostly been destroyed. Again, looks like somebody kicked in

the door. With that low of a perception slash investigation check, the only thing you gather from it is that it looks like whoever occupied it were smaller folk, not as tall as like humans or a ladron, smaller furniture, multiple beds. Looks like they had like a bunk bed type setup but things have been like picked clean and destroyed and there is mess all over the floor furniture has been broken up papers torn up I'll enter also okay I think I would look above the hearth to see if I could identify like who who might have been here if there's anything like that. Okay, go ahead and give me an investigation check.

That's a seven. You look around and it seems impersonal. It seems like the people that were here were here temporarily or had just gotten here. And I'll say even with a low roll, you find like above the hearth and in some of the spots on the wall, evidence that there was like a fight here, you see some like

slashes in the walls done by like a long sword or an axe or something. And little bits of the wall broken up, up where there might have been like spells or explosions. Okay. All right, fine. We can take a look, but I'm not touching anything. I peeked my head in the door. Wait, what do we think? Is this, is there some secret here or is this just a abandoned house?

It looks like there was, it looks like there was a fight here. Yeah, I was gonna say, it's kind of making me feel a bit sad for all the homes we tried to make and then had to leave. Yeah, this really reminds you of the sort of little houses with thatched roofs in Roussel. Almost like this house was- Got kicked out of Roussel.

Yeah. Oh, Okay. This actually is like the houses in Rossell. Does that mean we're close? It's... I think we're close, yeah, because it can't teleport too far away. But it also means that usually everyone's going to Rossell. There's like scraps and scrapes and everything because it's all criminals.

But there's like an unspoken, yeah, but we're all hiding from the same people. But this feels like it's elevated in fighting. There's something brewing. Yeah. So why would a house get kicked out of R'Cell? How would that even, how do you move a whole house? If it didn't teleport, would the rest of it? If it got left behind during a teleportation?

Callie, as you say that, you look at the mess on the ground, all of this broken down furniture and kind of destroyed hardwood and everything in the floor you see a little bit of some kind of peeking out some kind of glyph or something under all of the dirt and mess. Can I investigate the glyph and see if it's like an anti-magic anti-teleport? You guys take some time and begin clearing up the room. You see on the floor there are two painted glyphs. There's one that looks like it was there originally and then destroyed. Looks like somebody took like an axe to it or something, broke up the boards, and then there's another glyph over it. If you'd like to make an arcana check or an

investigation check or detect magic or something like that. I'm just going to give Calder the help action. There's no point in me trying. Okay. Can you read it? Let's see. With Callie's help, I think I can. 21. Okay. Calder, you look at this, you see that the type of magic that the original rune was, seemed to be a kind of like non-detection spell. Like these people did not want to be found. you see that the type of magic that the original rune was

seemed to be a kind of like non-detection spell. Like these people did not want to be found. And the one on top of it is a spell like a counter spell that would negate something like a teleportation. So this house, it looks like somebody came in here, fought the inhabitants or kidnapped them like somebody came in here, fought the inhabitants, or kidnapped them, and then hid the scene by leaving behind the whole house. Whoa.

And you also see at the edge of these runes are some like discarded tallow candles, like people did some kind of ritual here. Tallow candles? Okay, this is something I know. This is a memory I have. Uh-huh. What?

Um, okay, so I don't know if I've told you guys, but my mother was a diviner. It was awakened in her by Jovir. She, of course, didn't tell me when it happened, but there's this one time I remember when she was summoned by the Queen. When it happened, we were living in the Winter Court still and I was too young to really remember too much. I didn't even know what it meant at the time, but basically what happened was these mages from the Artem Court in these like dark robes and veils that cover their eyes but not the mouth came to speak with her and take her away.

And I remember that they smelled musty and stale like damp parchment and tallow candles. Do you think it's the same people that came here? I don't know. I mean, it was an unusual scent for Feywild. Feywild, everything's much fresher. This was very cloistered and cloying and so. Not alive. Yeah.

So it could be the sort of like divination guys. You think, did they work for Jovier? Yeah. Okay. And if they performed that ritual here and left this house behind, they might be in Rossell now. Oh no. And if they've breached Rossell's non-detection,

then all of Rossell is fucked. Okay. Well, if she kind of thinks about it and looks down at the glyph and goes, if this is to not be detected, then that means that whoever got here had to have done it without magical means. Which means that there has to be some kind of spy or something. There's a fucking rat in Russel. And Russel is not my favorite place in the world, but I owe my current freedom to it several times. Yeah, I thought we were done with rats. Okay, so this means all the more reason

that we have to be so low profile going into Russel. Get rid of any grenades you have. Yeah, do you want to like throw out the rest of them and just have a grenade afternoon? That was unfortunately the last one Okay, I'll also say with with last investigation check that you got Calder as you guys were like clearing stuff away to See this glyph see this non-detection thing. As you're cleaning up the mess, you find the hilt of a sword that looks like it was shattered and it has a leaf on it.

Were they green knights? Look around, this does look halfling sized. These green knights are there. So is it Juvia who's sending her like divination precog mages after Ceruleus? Yeah, is that what they're doing here? We've seen evidence of them all along the way. But what was a green knight because Russel is a shady place. Yeah. And the green knights have no reason to be consulting with criminals.

What are they doing hiding out in Rosselle? The last thing you find in this pile of garbage is a magazine called Mildred's Murmurs. Fuck me! I grabbed it. No! No! It's been so long! I have so much to catch up on.

I need to know what Lady Farferell is doing. You see on the cover of the magazine is the cover story, Queen Cirilla cleans out and cleans up. What? No, but she's a party girl. Wow, this is even better than Maxim. It's a picture of a beautiful summer Aladdin, the Seelie Queen herself, wearing an intricate crown with a sun pendant.

She's got long flowing golden hair that goes down to her feet. She's wearing a bold sparkling half gown half pantsuit that is bisected down the middle and somehow she's pulling it off. There are also sub headlines that include things like, Count Pyphus stepping out, but who's stepping in? And Winter Wizards trying to cool off Hot Girl Summer. Oh!

Turn, turn the page 32. Okay, I need to go see that, I need to go see that. Which one are you, which article are you going to? Winter Wizards. Okay, you look at the Winter Wizardsards section and you see amongst all of the language of just like who's who and all these like drab winter wizards and everything. You do see that there is an article saying that like mages of the winter court have prophesied trouble for the fey wild, but it's not very specific right now, but it might necessitate the cooperation of the two courts.

The two sides have hinted that they might be willing to intermingle. So the article is very frivolous. It's very much just like, who's who? Are we going to be seeing some seely unseely weddings? Okay, what about Queen Cirilla cleaning up? Okay, you look at that and you see a very flippant retelling of a story about a conspiracy that was uncovered of a group of green knights who tried to kill her, but they were rooted out. And you see the names Tobias Truehair, Thurla Stonefoot, Jildre Kindleaf, and Ness Rumblewater. And you see in the picture sections there's a

Summer Eladrin who is seen as like the hero of this, who like uncovered the conspiracy. He's got like copper hair, he's clad in green armor with a leaf and a sun symbol on his breastplate. And the caption reads, new captain of the Green Knights, Leonar. We know he can fight, but more importantly, is he single? Turn the page, turn the page. And you see that this guy is circled

and the word compromised is written next to it. Compromise. This is why the Green Knights might have revolted. Or he framed them. He could be working with Jovee. Yeah. This Leonardo guy? Yeah.

Yeah, you see amongst that one guy has compromise written on him. And other pictures, there's a picture of a summer court gala. And you see that other diplomats, knights and nobles are circled. Maybe like one in every 20. I commit this to memory as best I can, but I'm going to hang on to this. Great. You look through this, you make a mental note of each of the diplomats and people that this magazine are saying are compromised.

Is that a subscription? Like who this magazine was delivered to? Is there a name on it? No, it looks like it was just bought. Yeah, that's how you get mildews. Should we check the fashion section real quick? Yeah, yeah, let's do it. What do they say about shorts? Yeah. You open up to the fashion section

and you see that because of Queen Cirilla's bold choice, half pantsuits, half ball gowns are very in this season. And you see a picture of Queen Cirilla on a dance floor. You see she's holding a gloved handout to a man who is bowing to her asking for a dance. You see a question mark notated on him. You see he wears a green doublet, looks like a military-esque dress uniform. He has long black tied back hair and unmistakably familiar emerald green eyes. And the caption reads,

Queen Cirilla shares a dance with the newest addition to her royal guard, the dreamy Glenfear Gladeway. Oh! I ripped it off! I ripped it off! We need that, we need that. I ripped it off! Save the fashion section! We need that, we need that. Send the back section. And that's where we'll end our session.

How dare you! You've come to my home and become so fucking popular! We're over him! We're over him! Are we over him? Look how fucking good he looks! I called her Wences. We can see his pecs through the.

We have to be. We have to have moved on. Ah. Ah. And his proximity to Queen Cirilla is making him more attractive. You could flip a gold coin on those pants. Oh.

Incredible. Good God. Sweet, you can listen to us talk more about this over on our Patreon, patreon.com slash napalm. That's N-A-D-D-P-O-D, don't sing yet. And we're gonna talk about it. We're gonna talk about it.

We're gonna freaking gab like some nymphs. Does anyone have anything they'd like to plug? Yeah, big news actually. Either dropping right around now or dropping imminently. Very, very soon we are releasing our first ever Nadpod Croc Jibbit. Yeah, people asked for it and Cole will design them and they're so cute. we are releasing our first ever NAD pod croc gibbet. People asked for it and Paul will design them

and they're so cute. They are extremely cute. Really they're perfect for the pool. She's used for all those croc heads out there. The foster looks so chill. Yeah. It looks like he's having such a good conversation at a barbecue.

So yeah, check those out there at shop.nadpod.com. Yeah. Oh, we got a chicken on foster. We haven't talked to him yet. Oh yeah. He's Yeah. Oh, we got a chicken on foster. We haven't talked to him yet Oh, yeah He's around. Okay, great. We did the same thing with Papa is sometimes he just wouldn't rear for a couple episodes You can follow us on social media there may or may not use at CH first me at called these called well at X For Emily and at your grids is Jake and you can tweet about the show using hashtag nad pod

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