Not Another D&D Podcast - Eldermourne - Ep. 0: Welcome to Eldermourne

Episode Date: October 8, 2020

Welcome to Campaign 2! DM Murph gives us a run down on the dark fairytale world of Eldermourne while Emily, Jake, and Caldwell reveal their characters. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod&...nbsp;to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:01:21 brush processing. Code www-A-W-P-A-W. Goodbye, Sweeties. Welcome to the campaign after the campaign. This is not another D&D podcast. Welcome to Eldermore and everyone. Eldermore. What? Eldermore. What is that? Welcome to elderborn everyone What is the elder Morning elder morning to y'all elderborn to everyone
Starting point is 00:01:58 I can't even say welcome back because we have not been there yet and we will not be Quite going there today, but we'll be doing sort of a flyby We're reviewing some vintage postcards from yeah. Yeah, we're going to get in super late, so we're going to have to stay at the airport hotel, unfortunately. Yeah. We are just like my dad. My dad would be proud. Your dad does love a day before the flight.
Starting point is 00:02:19 Stay at the airport hotel instead of hanging out with us. Oh, man, it's a hot breath. It's a huge man. I love it. It's a power move. We cut casts, costs wherever he can. hotel instead of hang out guys nice again. You get that hot breath is before you go. I love it. It's a power move. We cut casts cost wherever you can. Cool guys.
Starting point is 00:02:28 So I will give everybody a little bit of a world overview first and then we can chat a little bit about the characters. Soren over elder more and I'm strapping myself in. Oh, that's right. Oh, I hope it's just like that soren ride at Disney where we get smells. Yes, I'm gonna weigh in and ask what the smells are for each description, just FYI.
Starting point is 00:02:51 And I'm hoping to get sprayed with just a little bit of water. All right. I will, as a Disney boy, we'll have to dive into this bit really deep, so I will be quite Patrick Warburton the whole time. As I introduce time as I introduce I Introduce us as we get into Elde Warren Transported. Yeah, so we are we are we are transported there
Starting point is 00:03:13 We should say that throughout the campaign whenever Mora has a really good description We should all do like a little cream your jeans I'm I'm transporting I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, I'm transporting, has just come on the little TV and it's time to get on the ride for Soren over elder mourn. So this is going to be a, we talked a little bit about this in the short rest and we'll get obviously mourn into the story as we do like episode one, but just to give you guys a little preview and talk a little bit looser about it, this is going to be a dark fairy tale setting. It's going to be a little bit Victorian inspired like Gothic horror. It's gonna be a little bit Victorian inspired,
Starting point is 00:04:05 like Gothic horror, it's gonna pull from things, especially in the world building from things like the Witcher and Bloodborne, but with a more whimsical, fun take on it. There's not gonna be any like, no lovecraft, fucking space bug bullshit, none of that stuff. There's no fucking book piece. Wait, no Star Spawn? Hold on, no Star Spawn.
Starting point is 00:04:27 No Star Spawn. Don't commit to anything. Oh, commit to anything. Okay, everyone, everyone wait in the comments. Should we leave space for Star Spawn? Can Star Spawn exist in this world? I say yes. You know what, no, I say Star Spawn.
Starting point is 00:04:41 Just if it was just Star Spawn, that would be fine. One of the biggest comments, not to get to it, do it, but I really love the vibe of Bloodborne, but once it was just like, again, we're really gonna lean into this fucking lovecraft shit. I'm just like, you got damn great. Get the psychic bugs out of here. I hate the goddamn psychic bugs.
Starting point is 00:04:59 So this is gonna be kind of like the Feywild meets Shadowfell. There's gonna be a lot more whimsical and fun. So good. Some of the things like Witcher and Bloodborne. So a lot of the palette of color. That's right. Colorful soup on a plate. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:15 A soup on a plate, but it's one of those soups where they decorate it with flowers. Yeah. Yeah, this is like a real hipster restaurant that still does really minimalist food. So it's still, you're still getting soup on a plate. It's just like solely a carrot soup but with like five flowers. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:05:31 So you're going to see a lot of like, you're not going to see anything. I'm going to describe a lot of things and hopefully you'll see your mind. You'll transport us though. Hey, don't have my imagination. Yeah, I can see things. So it's going to be a lot of like gothic architecture, like these big iron fences and cobblestone streets and gas lamps sort of a creepy vibe. But then on the flip side, there's also magic sprites
Starting point is 00:05:53 that fill the air like tiny glowing whips. They kind of fill the air kind of like stars or like fireflies or like nanorflies. I was just going to say, can you catch them in a jar? Definitely catch them in a jar. They be quite a bunch of. I am just gonna say, can you catch him in a jar? Definitely catch him in a jar. They'd be quite a bunch of you. I am not a bug having two characters who collect some, who collect glowing bugs in a jar, FYI.
Starting point is 00:06:12 If you collect, this is, so this is kind of like the Feywild and then like, it could fairy tales. So if you caught like a fairy in a bottle and kept it there, it's like you would just wake up in the morning and your son would be gone. Like he would just be like, oh no, I have angered the gods. So it's like, welcome to Elder Morn, don't touch the bugs. Yeah, like the dogs catch the bugs.
Starting point is 00:06:34 Don't touch the bugs. But yeah, the sprites that kind of float around, they change depending on kind of the mood of the situation. They're usually like playful, but their colors will change at night, or their color will change to dark blue if they're scared, or they're worried, or things are creepy. Okay. Right, so they're empathic.
Starting point is 00:06:56 Yes, so they're very empathic. They're very empathic. That's beautiful. Would they give you away? If you were trying to hide your emotions, and they were sprites nearby, would they give you a way if you were if you were trying to hide your emotions and there were sprites nearby? Would they give your feelings away or would they wouldn't express other people's it wouldn't be like I'm pretending I'm okay, but really I'm sad and then all the sprites around me turned blue. They could they could do that
Starting point is 00:07:17 But most likely they Wouldn't because they're they're kind of of of the trickster. So they're down with lying and stuff. Like, you know what I mean? I guess maybe if you had caught them in a bottle earlier, they might cut it all up your spot. Yeah, that's a great way that the Sprite would fuck with you. It's like that type of thing. But then also like the Sprites could fuck with you
Starting point is 00:07:41 in a way that's like, oh, I followed them out to a secret grove and I danced with them all night. And then when I left the grove, it turns out 100 years had passed, and my father's dead. So that's like, absolutely epic. Savage Frank.
Starting point is 00:07:57 Everyone I know is gone. Yeah. Absolutely savage Frank. Savage. I like this too because it's like, there's a little creature that I've never been able to work and I've wanted to work into something. I've had it written on a piece of paper
Starting point is 00:08:12 to try to work it into something forever, which are Willow Wisps. Oh yeah. Which are just a really cool, they're like not really a monster, they're like just kind of exactly what you're talking about. And I'm always like, I love the idea of this,
Starting point is 00:08:25 but I've never found a legitimate reason or a way to work it into something. Yeah, here we go. So I imagine them being kind of like whips. Except I feel like Will of the Whips are always bad. They always take you. They're technically evil. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:39 So these aren't evil. I think like, that would be a very extreme scenario. And I think that would only happen because they don't evil. I think that would be a very extreme scenario. And I think that would only happen because they don't understand. They've got a very childlike view of the world. So I think to them, it's just like, let's go dance. And it's just like, they don't know that you live a regular human life.
Starting point is 00:08:57 And they don't get along great. Yeah, exactly. I see no problems. Yeah. So then, so basically on the one side, you've got all this like fairy stuff and everything, all this very fun stuff. And then on the other side,
Starting point is 00:09:15 you've got undead horrors that are plaguing the world. Oh, so that's kind of the worst thing than getting pranked by fairies. Some of these undead horrors are things like simple zombies and kind of like skeletal monsters things that were just brought back from the dead, but others have kind of more poetic fairy tale origins. Maybe like there would be like a banshee
Starting point is 00:09:40 who was like a murdered lover and needs to get revenge or something. Compartee with us in the sprites. Yeah, it's fine. Who needs revenge when you can party for a hundred years? So yeah, there's this whole, there's basically like separate classes of horrors where there's like very simple zombies
Starting point is 00:10:01 that you can just like kind of defeat a zombie, but then there's also, you know, vengeful ghosts and things like that who might come up because of like broken promises or betrayals or things like that, you may need to like set things right to defeat some of these some of these horrors. I'm someone who loves just the feeling of spookiness. This is so delicious to me. It's definitely got spooky vibes. Your spoon feeding me spooky and I'm appreciating it. Yeah, it smacks a vibe and I'm here for it. I'm just picturing like the whips floating around and changing colors and then you see
Starting point is 00:10:40 those changing colors reflecting off of the like white ivory bones of a skeleton holding a sword. And you're just getting so transfixed by the moment that you don't even notice that the skeleton has killed you. Oh shit. Draw boys ready to draw. If anything, the sprites are definitely helpful for the, because they're not, I'll explain that in a sec,
Starting point is 00:11:03 but they're on kind of the opposite side of these undead horrors. So if anything, the sprites are kind of a giveaway for that. If you're in the woods and the sprites seem scared, that's bad. You know what I mean? It's like, oh no, why? It's, why are you all blue, little sprite?
Starting point is 00:11:20 This is great, it's like my air purifier, which changes colors depending on how bad the air quality is. So if the sprite changes colors, I know. There's a fire and some fire. So these two sides, the kind of horror side and then the magical whimsical side, come from two separate deities who are essentially feuding on the material plane. So let me explain kind of the pantheon just a little bit, just get into it a little bit without getting too into the weeds. Just a little bit.
Starting point is 00:11:52 Just a little bit. Let me taste your pantheon. Oh my God. Taste my pantheon. Explosive podcast rating. You know what? That's true. We should edit in this warning.
Starting point is 00:12:04 Warning. Any kids 12 and under should hurt the next sentence Emily's about to say should be escorted from the room. Oh my God. We had to timestamp it. We've edited out so weird to make a clean pot version of the podcast. Just Jake and Coldwell this episode. Okay. So there are essentially three gods, which I think is the first time in natpot history.
Starting point is 00:12:30 We've ever had three gods, you know? Whoa! Like the first limb. Extremely, extremely unique to this, and not at all, like anything we've ever done before. As a former religion major, or not former, as a religion major, I'm very jealous of you guys getting to make pantheons.
Starting point is 00:12:48 I hope someday I get to make my own pantheon and finally use my degree. I have to imagine that the party plane has a got up in there. Yeah. Yeah, but that's so personal to Zach, I'd have to run it by him. I want to just like, I want someone to give me a blank page
Starting point is 00:13:03 to put my pantheon on. Truly as, as I was putting together this pantheon and I was like running it by Emily being like, do you think this is cool? Do you think this is fun? And she's like, well, we did just do Trini Vale with three gods. Are you cool with that? And I'm just like, I think three is just the best number for things. It's just the best. I think as long as we get acknowledged that I came up with the idea of three gods. Yes. Okay, so my first god is named the DOS and What? Completely. This is Triniville. Oh my god. Oh, no, he's gonna do it better. Fuck.
Starting point is 00:13:40 Took a hundred episodes to just blow up my spot entirely. I have to This was all a long game. So basically there are these three gods who are siblings of an ancient primordial race. They are the elder, who's obviously the oldest, the reaper. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Yeah, the elder. Try to keep up.
Starting point is 00:14:04 Every elder should be the middle child. The Reaper. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Yeah, the other. All right. Try to keep up. Every other. Every other. Every other. Every other. There's the elder, the Reaper, and the trickster. Reaper is the middle child, and trickster is the youngest. The elder is the one who created the world,
Starting point is 00:14:19 and it's people, and the elder resides in reverie, which is kind of like heaven. So the kind of idea of this world, the like ultimate kind of afterlife is to get to go meet your makers, to go be in reverie with the elder and to know kind of godliness and no peace. This is really satisfying to me because I come from a family of three and we really fall into those, we really fall into the elder, the Reaper, and the trickster. You're the Reaper, right?
Starting point is 00:14:51 I'm the Reaper. No joke. This was inspired a little bit by something your mom said. What? Which is, Oh! Because the origin story of Emily is that after her parents had two kids, her mom was like, this is a little too neat.
Starting point is 00:15:11 We need like a little, like two kids, two parents is a little too neat. We need like a little something. She didn't like the symmetry of it. She wanted to add a little chaos. That is truly what my mom said. And that's actually her deal. She's funny because people always like associate me with being chaotic, what my mom said. Which is funny because people always associate me with being chaotic, but my mom before I even existed wished a little chaos for the famer.
Starting point is 00:15:31 She got a lot of chaos though. So you've got the elder who created everybody and is up in heaven waiting for everybody to get there. The reaper who is a figure that's a mixture of the grim reaper and lady justice. It's got like a cool side, but then also like a blindfold like justice is blind and then scales. I really love that aesthetic. It's so spooky. Someone with a blood like someone who's blindfolded and swinging a like I'm playing hideys right now. And I can just picture this being a boss
Starting point is 00:16:05 that I would have to fight. Yeah, I was so hard. And so the Reaper is in a, let's sort of limbo-like, like, purgatory-like plane called Exodus and judges the dead and decides whether or not they're worthy to go to heaven. So after you die, you go to the Reaper,
Starting point is 00:16:23 Reaper judges you and either you go back up to heaven, you get, or if you die, you go to the Reaper, Reaper judges you, and either you go back up to heaven, you get, or if you like failed, if you didn't lead like a good enough life, then you go back down and you are reincarnated, or worst case scenario, the Reaper is sometimes known to just cast souls off into his like limbo. That's like a really fucked up. You can do that, You can absolutely do that.
Starting point is 00:16:46 That seems overpowered. The reaper is definitely OP. And then the trickster resides on the material plane. She's like a fake queen. So the trickster, the trickster, very much like Greek gods and stuff comes down and hangs out with humans, like in disguise and things like that. But mostly is a way in like one of her groves and you kind of never know where she is. And the elder is kind of off, is like this higher being that you hope to like ascend to meet one day But the trickster and the Reaper have a feud that very much affects the material plane
Starting point is 00:17:30 Because before the trickster the world was very grim and plain and it was very easy for the Reaper to kind of judge Souls because the world was very black and white But when the trickster arrived on the material plane she gave magic to the people the trickster arrived on the material plane, she gave magic to the people, created the sprites and the fairies, and very much made it a more chaotic and lively place. So the Reaper very much hates the trickster and vice versa, the Reaper is the one sending these undead horrors to the material plane as punishment to humanity for harboring the trickster and for dabbling in magic. He's bringing, you know, kind of a plague on the world. Oh shit, does the Reaper want the trickster?
Starting point is 00:18:09 The Reaper wants the trickster gone. Oh, it's like. Ooh, wow, that's cool. So, this whole kind of like feud on the material plane is very much between like the Reaper sending these horrors down, trying to like lure the trickster out and take the trickster out. And the trickster just being like, nah, I don't care about your stupid game about judging me one way or the other. I'm gonna live on the material plane and I'm gonna have fun and my followers are gonna have fun and we don't give a shit. If you send us back here a million times, it's fine.
Starting point is 00:18:38 So the gods aren't omnipotent. They're just very powerful, so most people can go through their lives, acknowledging their existence, like they know it's real, it's not like a, there are certainly like stories and myths about them and everything, but there's enough like, like the trickster just like has shown up places,
Starting point is 00:18:58 has like gone places, and there is like evidence of that. It's interesting too, because it almost sounds like no one would really worship really the Reaper. People would just fear the Reaper. Yes. So be it, like live instead of like,
Starting point is 00:19:12 like it's like this very like Old Testament God that's just like don't fuck up or you'll get the Reaper's vengeance. That's right. A perfect way to describe it, because, yeah, no, no, no, the idea. That's what I do. The idea behind it is there's no like,
Starting point is 00:19:28 It's called listening comprehension. Because the elder, the elder is the one who created all the people. So there's no like, ah, thank the benevolent Reaper for like saving us and like creating us. It's like the Reaper is going to judge us, let's do what our vengeful God wants us to do so that we can go to heaven.
Starting point is 00:19:49 Go join the Elder. Yes, so the Riveries bun out into... Yeah, so that's like, so they're very like operated by fear, they're very like kind of pure tanical, whereas the tricksters followers are fun and chaotic. But because they are just these powerful beings that, and because the kind of, there's no real hell. And it's like,
Starting point is 00:20:11 I was just gonna say it sounds like there's no hell. It sounds like hell is, like the trappings of hell might just be what the Reaper would send to the mortal plane. Exactly. So in order for you to get cast off into the abyss or something, you have to essentially like directly oppose the Reaper or something like that. You have to be one of his enemies essentially or be a super, I don't know, fucked up in
Starting point is 00:20:43 like a monumental way. So if you told the Reaper to eat your ass, would you get cast in the abyss? Or if you- Or would you just go to Exodus? I think if in life you told the Reaper to eat your ass, you would probably just get sent back down. If while facing judgment you said eat my ass,
Starting point is 00:21:01 then he might just throw you away, yes. Yeah, I was gonna say, like you said, didn't you say they're not that omnipotent? So if you just said, eat my ass, rebirths, not like you would hear it. Correct. Yeah, he would need to have like, so like,
Starting point is 00:21:14 You can say it a bunch. I will. I will be testing this throughout the camp. Yeah. By the way, so you can, you can like, summon these, like you can speak to these gods and stuff. It's almost like in Bohumia, if somebody was on another plane and you wanted to like communicate
Starting point is 00:21:27 with them, it's a little harder obviously because they have like ways of blocking things and things like that and they're very powerful beings. But the idea behind kind of the Reaper judging you and everything is your soul arrives before him and he sees kind of the sum of the things you've done and decides from there. So it's not a every little individual moment is analyzed and this dude knows what you did. It's not like Santa Claus rules. It's not like everything you've done.
Starting point is 00:21:56 It's like it's almost like. You know when you were sleeping. Yeah. And it's almost like it's almost like according to his moral code, not like an objective moral code, not like an objective moral code. Right. Well, it's a little bit like theala where their moral code is fucked up
Starting point is 00:22:14 because they think they are the ones who need to administer it. And if you don't listen to it, you're wrong and you're bad. Their actual moral code though isn't like, be a bad person and kill people. You know what I mean? So, if you are like a good person, you can still be rewarded.
Starting point is 00:22:35 You know what I mean? You don't have to like worship the Reaper's feet and like go kill the tricksters people to ascend to heaven. You can still just be a good person to be to go to heaven, but you know he's also sending fucking plagues and shit on the world, which is very bad. I really hope that my character gets to go to heaven. I think all my D&D characters have gone to heaven thus far. We are one for one, yeah. Two for two. All your day went to heaven. Oh, it's you.
Starting point is 00:23:06 Oh, yeah, we had that. We had that 20 minute sequence of me as Jesus Christ interacting with me. I accept you. It's my savior. And you mine. Let's get some wine, dude. Nice Jesus voice. Thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:23:23 I worked so hard. Really good. Look you so much. I worked so hard with you. Really good, good guys. So these gods, they're not going to be, because they are these powerful beings who have other things to do other than metal in the lives of every single individual person,
Starting point is 00:23:39 you're not going to be as affected by them specifically. You guys are going to have your own things and your own towns and everything. This more just kind of like inspires the world. So anyway, let's talk a little bit about kind of the society that you guys will be living in and everything. So you guys will be characters living in a place called the Under Mountain Empire.
Starting point is 00:23:58 And it's called such because it is south of a mountain range that kind of protects it from invaders to the north. The idea is kind of that there's like mountains that kind of make like almost like a pincer effect where it's like very, very difficult for them to get south. And the empire at one time was separate cities and countries filled with sort of the various fantasy races that you would have seen in things like Lord of the Rings, like you got your elves, your dorses, your, uh, with separate cities and countries filled with sort of the various fantasy races that you would have seen in things like Lord of the Rings, like you got your elves, your
Starting point is 00:24:28 dwarves, your halflings, your orcs, etc. But after kind of many years of infighting as separate countries and everything, they finally joined under one banner. And at this point, the empire has existed for hundreds of years and many generations of people have been living together. So it's rare to find someone who's kind of just, you know, just an elf or somebody who's just an orc. Usually it's people coming from very, from different backgrounds and lineages and everything. And likewise, the kind of quote unquote, bad guy monsters that you would meet in kind of a regular D&D campaign, you know, bad guys like Lycan Throbs or Vampires or something, they can kind of swing either way.
Starting point is 00:25:08 Most of the like horrors that are sent by the Reaper are mindless in a sense. They're very like, they're monstrous. They're not as like calculating. It's the humans that are calculating. To what? It's the humans that are calculating. What? We were in a huge bad guy. That's right.
Starting point is 00:25:31 We're the monsters. We're the monsters. So when the other monsters are good in this world. Yes, so there's a difference between kind of monsters and horror. So a monster would be like a werewolf. Werewolves are good go either way. You can be in a nice werewolf. It's fun. Just cool guy. That's cool guy Good guy could just be could just be Randy the werewolf and he's nice. Yeah Hey, how you doing? Oh, I spilled something out here. You cook in you cookin' in there. Yeah
Starting point is 00:26:00 You want me to throw a link on here for you? If you could throw a whole row of links, I wouldn't mind. Oh, really? Randy, the cooler stock, help yourself. Oh. Yeah, I'll go call everyone, beer. Crack it with a claw.
Starting point is 00:26:15 Randy's in the two beers. Randy, the werewolf, who uses his werewolf powers to smell people barbecuing so that he can hover and be invited to the barbecue. Is his move. Anyway, so when this empire first came together, there was an ambitious emperor that attempted to turn it all into one great city spanning half the continent, like spanning the whole empire basically.
Starting point is 00:26:41 It's kind of inspired by Ravnica, which is a D&D and magic gathering setting that's like the idea is like this whole world is like one enormous city that spans the entire length of the world. This does not get that far. This like didn't work out. The capital, which is to the south, is extremely developed, but as you kind of go further north, the project fizzled out a little bit. Settlements begin to get like further apart as you go north and there are some like undeveloped areas, but overall the entire Empire is pretty
Starting point is 00:27:18 well-developed and like everything has pretty much been discovered there and everything. If you're to run into a like forest or something, it's because there's a curse there. You know what I mean? There's no uncharted territories. It's like, you can't go somewhere because there's something stopping you from going there. So there's not as much uncharted territory
Starting point is 00:27:40 as there is just dangerous territory. Right. Although I will say, this world is basically just the one continent for now that's kind of all that's been discovered by humanoids because if you sail too far out, ships disappear. It's kind of rumored that the trickster has her secret grove out somewhere on like an island in the ocean,
Starting point is 00:28:06 and fairies will like mix you up. There are monsters in the sea, whether they were sent by the reapers and by the trickster. It's not really known because people usually don't come back. Okay. So the reason the capital is at like the south end though, is because they can kind of have access to the ocean there,
Starting point is 00:28:26 but without worries of being attacked by another like navy or something, because a, they're in empires, they control everything in the area, and b, if like one of the northern nations or something sent boats all the way wrapped around the continent, they would probably get destroyed by some kind of fairy monster along the way. So they're kind of invincible. Randy's having a bad day. Yes. And then also the capital down there, this enormous port city to the south that is like the
Starting point is 00:28:58 size of a country also has access to like a couple nearby islands that they use for like mining and something. So they kind of control the wealth. Also has access to like a couple nearby islands that they use for like mining and something so they Kind of control the wealth So despite it not truly being one big city the individual states of the empire are named like city neighborhoods so there's there are like inter provinces and then the inner burrow and then the outer burrow which is on kind of the north which is The maybe more of like kind of the boonies.
Starting point is 00:29:26 On each state is run by a petty king or a petty queen, kind of like a duke almost, that answers to the high queen of the capital. You guys will be starting in a small town called Thorn Kirk, which is an unimportant town. So now I'm rethinking everything, because now I'm thinking I should be a petty queen, my character.
Starting point is 00:29:46 Oh, dang yeah. You can't run a country. I'll find a way to be petty. Don't worry about that. You can be a petty queen. You can be a petty queen, but you can't be a petty capital queen yet. You can be a yes, petty queen.
Starting point is 00:30:01 Can I be a nasty little Duke? You can be a nasty little Duke as if it's like a little piece of shit. This is the royalty campaign. But yes, you guys will be starting a small town called Thorn Kirk, which is an unimportant town along the coast of an important river. Hey, no judgments. No judgments. No, I'm important to you.
Starting point is 00:30:22 Maybe important to us though. Yes, it will. S. I.M. the. Maybe important to us though. Yes, it is. It's I am the petty queen of Thorn. Very, absolutely. Well, first off, this is just one town within like the entire, like this country. Uh, so they're, so you're saying there's not a petty queen of Thorn. Curk.
Starting point is 00:30:38 They're absolutely is not a petty queen of Thorn. I could aspire to the head of queen of Thorn. Curk. You're, you're being a petty queen right now. Ha ha ha ha. Bow to her small mindedness. Ha ha ha ha. You know what?
Starting point is 00:30:53 That's pretty much what I think I want to give everybody in episode zero. Why don't we talk a little bit about the characters? This episode of NADPOT has brought to you by Bird Dogs. There are company that makes pants and shorts, so no matter where you fall and the age old battle between the two, you can rest assured that Bird Dogs has you covered. Now we all know when the legwear war begins and we're forced to choose a side, it's gonna be difficult.
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Starting point is 00:32:00 slash pop-a or enter promo code pop-a at checkout. That's birddogs.com slash pop-a or promo code Papa at checkout. That's birddogs.com slash Papa or promo code Papa for a free Yeti style Tumblr. You won't want to take your bird dogs off, we promise you. Okay, that's it for me. Go team pants and enjoy the show. Emily, do you want to chat about your character? Yes, I can. My character's name is Fia Bogania. Emily, do you want to chat about your character? Yes, I can. My character's name is Fia Boginia.
Starting point is 00:32:29 Fia is the witch on the edge of town. When she was a teenager, a traveling witch took her under, took Fia under her wing. I'm begin to train her, but eight years ago that which disappeared. So now Fia lives in this missing which is hut, which is actually just an abandoned derailed locomotive from a failed railway just outside of Thornkirk. So she kind of like lives, lives in this abandoned rail car, trying to teach yourself magics without a mentor. She lives there with a shelf full of magical spell books, which belonged to the previous tenant and her previous mentor, so they don't respect her. So they either mouth off to her or bite her whenever she tries
Starting point is 00:33:17 to open them, except for one book. She does have a spell book, which is her trusty spell book. It's an animated and nervous little tone that follows her wherever she goes kind of flying with its jacket. It's essentially we're flavoring the fine familiar spell to be a little book that flies. You have a pet book. I have a pet book. I think his name is going to be book far. Because I looked it up in Bulgarian, it means primer. And this is like my first spell book. And then in Croatian, it means spelling book. So I like the idea that name could be book var. But me and Murph have gone back and forth a
Starting point is 00:34:00 little bit. And he's definitely a nervous little spell book who just wants to be in a cool, dry place and safe. Could we go back inside, maybe find a nice, cool, dry place to rest our pages? Yeah, so then technically, I'm like one mechanically, I'm like one level cleric, one level wizard, to kind of be like this hedge witch. Cause like, you know, the idea is like this traveling which taught me a little bit of magic
Starting point is 00:34:32 before she disappeared. She was essentially training me, but then disappeared. So it's like, you know, she taught me like some minor illusions and some magic that I can like use to make a little coin. Obviously anyone who visited the witch at the edge of town probably wouldn't be forthcoming with the fact that they did. But she also know like a little bit of healing too because any good hedge which has to be well rounded. But I think that, me and my have talked about like, since I'm kind of like a little bit of a, a little bit of
Starting point is 00:35:03 an outcast living on the edge of town practicing magic that would not be allowed by the Reaper that I'm, that I, I'm mostly using my healing on like different like werewolves and werefolk that are kind of like on the edge of town as well. So, I definitely have one we're talking about Randy. I definitely have like a, like a werewolf friend that I heard his mouth. He burns his mouth on like the top of a sausage link. He can come up.
Starting point is 00:35:32 Exactly. And I was at a bar with you. I can put a healing salve on it, mixed from herbs. But another thing is that the the witch that I was trying to mentor under who disappeared, she had an umbrella stand of swords because she was essentially a blade witch. And so, like, Fia's kind of been training with them on the side, using them to, because the horrors will go after like the wear folk. So you know, she'll like she's starting to like try to help protect them rather than just heal them. And then in terms of what she looks like, here's what I'm picturing, she's tall with like short crisp sword cut black hair and sword cut baby bangs. I think she's got like the
Starting point is 00:36:26 laced boots of a horror hunter and she's got like an under bite of fangs that are actually like little vestigial tusks from some ancient lineage and then I technically I have chainmail because I'm a a war, so I have better armor proficiencies, but we're flavoring it as I have abduration sigils, tattooed on each palm, that would help protect me in battle. So yeah, so I think that on the palm, so I think yeah, I think the silhouette I picture for her is like, she's got a silhouette I picture for her is like,
Starting point is 00:37:05 she's got a sword strapped to her back. She's got this little book flying over her shoulder, and then she's got like a book belt with these two super unruly books. Like one that mouths off to her, and then a beastiary that bites her every time she tries to open it. So that's kind of what I'm picturing. You're a book lady. I'm a book lady, yeah. I'm just like, you know, it's hard to be a wizard
Starting point is 00:37:30 and not just lean into the book aspect. Yeah, dude, I love it. And also, I love books, so why not? You got a feral books around you. Yeah, that's what, because me and Murf talked about, we talked about like, oh, what do we want to do for wizards have to kind of earn their spells a little bit and like doing gold, doing gold to level, like to get spells, just feels kind of cumbersome. So I was like, well, we're in this magical world. The idea that
Starting point is 00:37:55 like a spell book would have its own personality, they would have to like overcome to, you know, like that you would have to win over to use it. And also like being self-taught, it's like there's like an element of instability to all the magic. So yeah, I like the, I like wizardly magic being something, being something kind of like that you have to like tame or something like that.
Starting point is 00:38:20 I love that spell books are like the Pokemon of this world on this, you have to like get them and. Yeah. It is going to be really fun to like wherever we go to be like, uh, want to find the library, you know, or like if I like, if I like find a magical book, just like stalking it and hunting it down and trying to like procure a spell from it. Are all books in this world sentient or just spell books? I think when we talked about it, it was kind of just like not all of them would be. Yeah, I would say like some powerful spell books and stuff, and I think a lot of that stuff would be like,
Starting point is 00:38:53 the wizard who had it before brought it to life. And it makes it like easier to like, it's essentially like Siri. It's like you spell book. That's great. That's great. That's great. That's great.
Starting point is 00:39:04 That's great. Do you essentially? Yeah, I also like the idea that like a spell, like that a book full of spells would sort of take on its own personality or like, even like the idea of like a be scary that keeps biting me just like really felt quite satisfying. Yeah, it's also again, like kind of leaning into that Feywild stuff. There is a lot of power to like intention and things like that.
Starting point is 00:39:26 So if a powerful wizard has a magical book, it is likely that it would have some kind of, you know, sentient vibes to it, whether or not it was like quote unquote awakened. Yeah. But like my copy of the Da Vinci code that my character has not not sentient, not sentient. Not yet. You know, like maybe with time, the story will be potent enough to bring to life. Like Nicholas Cage. Um,
Starting point is 00:39:51 just on Hakes, or just Nicholas Cage. Oh wait, what, no, I'm thinking of National Treasure. Oh, yeah, actually. I think that it's, I think that your Da Vinci Code book is inhabited by the spirit of national treasure. Yes, for some reason it is... That damn trickster! Sweet, on that note, why don't we learn a little bit about Colgol's character?
Starting point is 00:40:15 Oh yes, of course. I'm going to be playing Zirk Vervein, who is an Artificer alchemist, is the class that I have chosen. Zirk is an amateur apothecary, a hopeful healer, and a bit of a talented tinkerer as well. Zirk has been kind of traveling around, I guess, the outer borough, looking for work, trying to, like, you know, spread his healing touch and also find someone who will teach him because he's actually not much of a healer at this point If I needed to describe sirk I would say he's like Inspired by a classical
Starting point is 00:40:57 Elven figure you know slender But like slightly pointy ears, but I think the most dominating feature of Zerks' personality is that he's extremely tired. He looks maybe like if an elf from Rivendell was in the library for a week studying for finals. As we were talking about this character, I remember you saying, what if Geralt of Rivia didn't have any muscles? Exactly. I saw a guy like that in a movie the other night.
Starting point is 00:41:28 I watched the van Helsing and there's like the leader of the mob because they're a mob at one point. The leader of the mob looks like that. Yeah, I am less than Helsing is what we'll call my character. So yeah, I think I have like slightly pointy ears that like droop down a little bit to indicate how tired I am like big rings under my eyes and like I think I might wear some like small circular little glasses I don't know if they're shaded or not maybe I've magically shaded them.
Starting point is 00:41:57 Does it deserve like trouble sleeping or do you just you know meet a lot of sleep? You can never get it. I think zerks stays up late working on potions and tinkering with things. So like from a mechanical perspective. He gets the nighttime zoomies. Absolutely. Yeah, it's just like, I had an idea to see it through. And like I'd already made, I already made a pot of coffee.
Starting point is 00:42:18 So like I guess I'm just gonna drink it all. Feels wasteful, not to. What? But like mechanically, he only needs four hours of sleep because I use the Elf stats, but I think in-game, he's just staying up late all the time and he's just only got four hours of sleep. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:42:37 He's just like four, like four, three, two, and I'm fine, I'm good to go. You don't look good to go, man. I'm set, I'm set, bud. Don't worry about me. And yes, right now. Drinking salt. Zirk is working the very unglamorous job
Starting point is 00:42:51 of being the apprentice to the doctor in this small village who also works as a coroner. So you're a coroner's assistant. It's very grim and very scary. Dipping from both pots, like he's got, he's got a vested interest in killing you, right? If he's the doctor. I mean, just like the doctor, yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:10 Oh, yeah, and I sure the doctor shouldn't also be the coroner. The coroner's the kind of doctors, right? Yeah, technically they are in the medical professionals. Especially in a small village or a less technological, or you know, something where a population is smaller. I think that the doctor or coroner would be one in the same. Yeah, I guess funeral director. That's the job you shouldn't also. Yeah, that's the job you shouldn't double up on. I'm loving this logic that like
Starting point is 00:43:34 somebody who works at a morig or somebody who is a coroner just loves dead people, loves dead people which is kill you just to have another body, because they love him. In a fancy world, you never know. I mean, I think a big part of, like, Zirk, as, like, a healer and an alchemist, is that, you know, he's working with, like, a limited understanding. So, I think one of the initial pitches I had for this character was,
Starting point is 00:43:57 he's, like, a, like, frontier, quack medicine doctor, who's medicine and magic actually work. So, I think, like like being around corpses a lot would be good for Zerg because he's like, oh wow, look at all that free bile. That's just like, that's free bile. I can just, that body's not using that bile. I'll just like scoop some of that bile.
Starting point is 00:44:15 Please stop scooping the bile. I'll go into, wait, what would you do with the bile? You make some corks medicine, you know? There's like a lot of leading work to the medicine to save the two years. I'm not a single fucking potion from you. Orcs medicine, you know, there's a lot of leading orcs of medicine to say that you're fired up. I'm not even a single fucking potion from you. If there's a chance, I'm gonna make a potion
Starting point is 00:44:31 without yellow bile. Okay, good luck, good luck out there. Sick. Yeah, I think that Zirk was hoping to learn a little more about like proper medicine, but the ratio has been a lot more coroner to actual doctor in his months since working with this guy. Yeah. Yeah, that's that's Zerke.
Starting point is 00:44:52 Also, I do think he has one of his weapons is a mace, which I've styled to just be a giant like brass pipe that he smokes out of. Oh, nice. Yeah. Cool. I was going to smoke a cigar. We are. I just asked Merff today. I was like, what about a cigar? Oh man. We're gonna get a tiny, like a small, like a short thick cigar. I was like, what if I'm really, I wouldn't have them all the time. It's just like, I like tea and I like cigars. It's great to see. I like having a cigar. It's great. Yeah. This is going to be great.
Starting point is 00:45:25 I can roll cigars for you using my alchemy. As long as there's no bile in them. There might be a little one. Just a little bit to seal it. Shall we, shall we move on to Jake's care? Okay. Share your chair. I will.
Starting point is 00:45:38 Henry Hogfish. I've been describing him as the most medium man you've ever met. Henry is average in every way, unremarkable to a remarkable degree, five foot nine, 180, and he looks like he got, it looks like his last haircut was a buzz cut, but that he hadn't got it recently. So it's kind of just grown in evenly all right.
Starting point is 00:46:02 I feel you're Henry. So Henry is, he's just like a guy whose luck has run out twice. He was like turned away from home at a young age, found a job on a ship, prevented a mutiny by telling on everybody and then was turned away from the ship, found a job,
Starting point is 00:46:21 kind of as like a bargeman just doing cargo transports And then fell in love with the bosses rebellious daughter. They got married I didn't clear this with Murph But I'd like him to have a son if it's possible. Yeah, sure. Yeah. All right. He has a son but then he his wife realized that she was out of his league She left him eloped with a more powerful, wealthy, noble, left Henry, and he's been turned out for the second time. So you'll meet Henry at his lower than low.
Starting point is 00:46:53 Oh my gosh. You can't wait to help Henry. First things first, I'm gonna give him a haircut with my blade. If I can give myself baby bangs, actually I'm just gonna give you the same haircut I have. It's fine, it's fine. You're gonna have to let them grow out first.
Starting point is 00:47:09 I'm trying to decide if we should reveal Henry's extremely sad living situation. Do you wanna save him for the short res? No, I think we could say it now because I think this is all part of the character stuff and stuff that, like, Henry knows and is not a secret secret and also it might be harder to kind of allude to at the time. But Henry is living with his ex-wife's cousin. I thought he was ex-wife's third cousin.
Starting point is 00:47:38 Yeah. Like far enough that he could almost be an acquaintance. I don't know why we have to qualify. We got to qualify it by being third cousin. Yeah, but we met him at the wedding. And he's sort of like a black sheep at the family. It's the only person I know in town, so I'm living with him.
Starting point is 00:47:54 Yeah. That is. And he is actually, Jake, I don't know if you know are gonna know this. He is the baron in town. No, I did not know that. But there's very much like the idle rich, like kind of has lost control of the town
Starting point is 00:48:08 and just does like hobbies and it's just like kind of a fucking weirdo. And I'm just living, I'm like living in his pool house. Cousin, Cousin, coming up quick. I want to wrestle. I'm not technically your cousin anymore actually. So yeah, just the guy that lives here, the marriage was an old. Oh yeah, that was one thing we specified was that his ex-wife's new husband is so powerful
Starting point is 00:48:33 that he got the marriage an old even though they were married for like years. Like he never happened. I'm not a divorcee. I'm a never-wed. It's hard to do that in this world, I imagine. Or an unwed. An unwed. Henry Hogfish, the unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The unwed. The, that's absolutely fair. I'd like to be 511. Wow, okay. Oh, and then, yeah, then I should specify as well
Starting point is 00:49:09 that I have, I'm only 35, but I've got like, I'm going gray. We got like salt and pepper in the buzz cut. That almost sounds cool. I think that works though. Yeah. I also, I don't know if I said that was a good one. I think Beast trying to earn her grays. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:23 Yes, Henry is an echo knight. Oh, right. We have, we have reflavored for that. So an echo knight is a subclassified or Jake is playing a fighter again, which, Hey, everybody. It will feel very, it will feel very different. But an echo knight is a subclass of fighter
Starting point is 00:49:44 where you get an echo, which is basically a copy of yourself that you can use a bonus action to summon, and then you can switch places with your echo as you get higher level. You can make a tax with your echo as you get higher. It's a very fun dynamic. And for this campaign, for the flavor of this campaign, we are making Jake's echo his shadow. So Henry has a, you guys were only gonna be starting
Starting point is 00:50:06 at level two, so you haven't gotten your subclass bonuses, but Henry's shadow has been acting a little funky lately. Yeah, the latest ill luck to befall Mr. Hogfish. Oh, I don't even fucking get along with my shadow. Is this like Peter Pan style or it's like kind of like, you know, Sassy and you while you're not looking? It is a little sassy for sure.
Starting point is 00:50:29 Sassy shadow. Mm. Mm. My check out is it feel to be the shortest member of the party? I'm sure that'll find some kind of magic item that makes me six foot two. I'll be right back.
Starting point is 00:50:41 She. She. Henry instantly dies and has to be reincarnated. I've been texting Murph on the side ever since Emily said she was 5-11. The only person who exists from Bohumi in this world is actually Hugo. So you can borrow his heels. And he, for me, is... That's the magic item you find.
Starting point is 00:51:02 Find this little guy It makes you a shape shifter, but only for high you go style. I'm just imagining the thousand comments the episode We get if we just put out episode one with a mere blooming belt That's right we listen to the fans. He's a permanent party member now. We listen to the fans and everyone is dead and we have to start over. New world. Every episode would be like a one shot because we would die everything. Yeah, betraying a new and fun way. The time loop we keep remembering you go. Sweet everybody. I think that's all for this week. We will be talking more about all this stuff over on the short rest.
Starting point is 00:51:47 We'll get into the nitty gritty a little bit and talk a little bit more about our stats and about kind of the builds we're expecting to do and everything. And that'll be kind of the more game-focused aspect of episode zero. So you can head on over to patreon.com slash nadpod, that's n-a-d-d-p-o-d, don't sing yet. To check that out, in the meantime, does anybody have anything to plug? I would love to shout some things out from our PO box, if you all don't mind. Yeah, I would.
Starting point is 00:52:18 I would love it if you did. Very cool. First and foremost, I want to give a huge shout out to Brooke B, a NAD pod, a very talented NAD pod fan artist who sent us copies of the one big, zine NAD pod fanzine. Oh, yeah. Oh, gosh, you're so awesome. Oh, it's so incredible. I think it was just so incredible.
Starting point is 00:52:37 I finally looked through it last night. Yeah, it's incredibly cool. And what's even cooler is that, thanks to the zine they've raised a $1,200 for two amazing charities one is for the Gworyl's a rent and gender affirming Surgery fund and the other is know your rights camp big thanks to at bruskebe at KL star That's Kestrel and at Sam Canyon Sam underscore Canyon for putting this book together and yes if you Buy the book, I believe the proceeds will go to one of those charities as well. That's really awesome.
Starting point is 00:53:10 Yeah, check out the NAD pod scene, highly, highly, highly recommended, even beyond just being for a good cause. The art is truly amazing. I thought, as I went through it, I was like, surely I've probably seen all these things. And I had not There's some truly incredible pieces that have not been posted online to my knowledge
Starting point is 00:53:31 And they were man. It's incredible. You all did an amazing job. Thank you all so much. It is sumptuous I also like to shout out Austin B who works at pop sockets and sent us a bunch of custom sockets with our characters and logo on them Um y'all might not believe this about me, but I Drop my phone a lot Unbelievable possible no way Uh-huh, my real-life dexterity store is not very good. I dropped my phone a lot. So this is very helpful for me Spillboy drops his phone We actually this is this is very helpful for me. Spillboy drops his phone. Spillboy.
Starting point is 00:54:05 We actually, this is very short. This is very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short.
Starting point is 00:54:13 You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short.
Starting point is 00:54:21 You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. You're very short. It's a chocolate Swiss roll. And when I heard about it, I laughed and I said you would have been able to do it. And you were like, fuck you dude, why do you think I can't do it? And I was like, those are so hard to make.
Starting point is 00:54:31 And I said, that's a good point. We'll have to see if art called well or spill boy called well applies to baking. Cause it could be either, cause it is artistic. So it is like does called welldwell, who could make these fantastic pieces of art come through? Or does the dude who spills coffee all over our duffel bag when we're trying to transport shirts for a live show?
Starting point is 00:54:53 That call one. I forgot about that one. The latter could remind you. So tune into the short rest to hear if I succeeded in making the cake. You've got a live stream. You have to live stream that Brian C sent us a bunch of nice postcards hope sent us some lovely notes best of luck to your half-ling tip is cleric in their campaign Hope love a temp is clear. Yeah, command the storm Megan sent Emily some rose gold D20 earrings
Starting point is 00:55:27 Thank you very much. Very fancy. Catherine W sent us some character sketches of the band of boobs and a very nice note. We are so so glad we could help you through tough times. Catherine, it truly warms our heart and thank you so much for those drawings. Nicole T sent us a rainbow cross stitch of quotes from the show. It is stellar. I think we have enough like cross stitches to make an entire cross stitch wall. I love all the cross stitches that we did. And we should.
Starting point is 00:55:52 Yeah. You know what? It'll be like a full room and there will be like a cross stitch bed and a cross stitch couch in there. And you'll honestly be a little confused when you enter. And that's all the shout outs I have for this week. I've got plenty more coming up in the weeks to come though.
Starting point is 00:56:08 If you would like to send us something, you can do it at 1920 Hillhurst Avenue, number 222, Los Feliz, California, 90027. Jake, you have anything else? Yeah, I'm going to plug our merch store because we've got a couple new drops in there. Some major new drops actually. We just reordered gray and blue, moonstone, crew neck sweatshirts. We've got the Bonfraer tank in there.
Starting point is 00:56:30 We still got some inventory. Our Hot Boy Summer poster. I don't know if we've ever even talked about it on the show, but the Hot Boy Summer poster is beautiful. A Bahumia all over sigil tea and an all over dice pattern tea not to mention the newest blade home university sweatshirt and hoodie. Oh, it looks so good.
Starting point is 00:56:52 It looks like a real college sweatshirt. Very collegiate. Fall is here. Check them out. If you wear it, people will be like, wow, is that like near Oxford? Is that the real food universe? We should do a collegiate starter set.
Starting point is 00:57:07 That's the Glade Home sweatshirt, but then the bone-for-air shot glass. Wow. And an iron D pie t-shirt. Yeah, I got bullied at iron D pie. I got bullied into not reading at iron D pie. And all I have to show for it is these awesome quads. And everything worked out because I made great friends
Starting point is 00:57:32 along the way. Anyway, yeah, you can follow us all on Twitter. You know, I'm not tweeting much these days, but you can follow us all on Twitter. At CHMERSH is me, Addy, Accord, Assembly, At J. Kerr which is Jake and at Call D is called D and you can tweet about the show using hashtag nadpa, that's n-a-d-d-p-o-d. We are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are It's the end of the show everybody and that means we need to shout out our benevolent council of elders.
Starting point is 00:58:16 Starting with Brad D. Jeffreas, Haldor Frostback, Steelbreaker, Matt M. and Jordan DJ, Sprite, pranksters who like to lure unsuspecting peasants into fairy grows, and then tabletop them. And even though the prank causes the peasants to plane shift to a reality where their loved ones never existed, they all agree that it was a pretty epic prank. HENZ of course we've got Cutter W, Jive G, Zolo Dolo, Dylan B, and Schubert the Mushroom, a group of soldiers known us the Thorn Kirk Merks.
Starting point is 00:58:48 They pride themselves on being affordable and their motto is, when it comes to King the Petter, the Bedier. Danielle the Dastardly Dame, Andrew M, Beardman Dan, and Scott D, the Reaper's team of judges who help them come up with punishments for cursed souls. Currently they're trying to decide whether to transform a thief into a sentient pile of severed hands, or just make him a skeleton and call it a day. Danny P. Elena C. Mixologist Michael McDee and Boundlor's boy, Book Hunters, who travel the world of elder mornin' search of rare spell books and tomes. They're basically
Starting point is 00:59:22 Van Helsing but with cardigans and librarian glasses. Andrew B. Justin I. T.J.M. the No. Barbarian. Alaina M. and Traylee the cray-fay. A group of star spawn that live on an island main entirely of worms. With our heroes ever discover this paradise amongst the waves. The answer of course is yes. Literally the second they get the pants on a boat. I didn't write that one. Jared E. Grisdiver B. Austin Bonsa, MR. Damien R. and Jordan L. Alchemical scholars whose bold but slightly outdated theories inspired Zirk to pursue the healing arts. Thanks to them, Zirk now knows that diseases are caused by tiny invisible goblins taking baths in your blood. Knowledge truly is power.
Starting point is 01:00:06 Cyborg version of Josh the Cobalt, Gage M, Skokilla, Destin Sea, and Richard X Machina, Northern Folk who live above the massive mountain that divides the continent, Hope, things are going well up there, and if not, we'll see you in 50 episodes or so, I'm sure. Michael L, Kelvin Nudel, Sergio Salazar Salaman Sakurai's De Sakwani dressed the traveler and Jori S. The elder mourn PR team that specifically gave Murf copy about the fairies but not about the horrors currently drafting a sternly worded scroll. Dana G. Kellemell, Ryan, Jack L. and flawless whale, makers of The Reaper Keeper, the best way
Starting point is 01:00:45 to store and organize your list of souls, and the net worth of their deeds. Temporal, Sam L, Nicholas C, Reese NS, Samuel B, and Mike H. The crew of sailors that gave Henry the last name hog fish. They meant it to be an insult, but when he embraced it and changed all his paperwork to reflect it, they kind of respected his commitment. Matthew E. Colton B. Adam G. Mateo C. and Eric B. A family of werewolves who used magic to disguise the scent of their barbecue so Randy doesn't come over and hog the ribs. Get out of here, Randy! Panama James, Adrian the Halfling Bard, John H.N., anime, intellect, and Dan.
Starting point is 01:01:25 The candle makers who make a collection called The Sense of Eldemorn. So far it's just brimstone and wet grass, but they're hoping one of the new characters is into baking because they'd love some humier sense to work with. Nikki W. Grace G. Drew Nasty, C.C. Lulu and Jay, a pantheon of minor deities that will vengefully haunt Elmore into Punishmer for forking to include them. Bung'sinator, Douglas A. Michelle O. Luke H. Aiden R.H. and Ritterin, an HR company that runs team building retreats for horrors.
Starting point is 01:01:57 So far, the horrors have mostly ignored the obstacle course and bonded over consuming the souls of the people who work there, but hey, that still counts as teamwork. TimmyR, LucasB, Erinus, KevinM, and AustinC, Henry Hoggfish's intramural basketball team, they've had a standout season for such a normal, average team stacking their record to a staggering 6 and 5. DevonW, New York, StevenC, and KJ, animated books in Fias library. They are tombs of lured fanfictions so they are quite sassy. Rowel N. Mike K. Maxwell C. Nick L. and Karen T. Traveling merchants who stole Zerks patented
Starting point is 01:02:39 biopocean recipe and planned to mass produce it. Unfortunately for everyone involved, it is incredibly toxic. Echathor 666, Justin Raccoon, Nick W, Michael C, and Robert F. Super chill, Reaper Youth Pastures. They are currently trying to rebrand the Reaper as more of a heavy metal mascot than a vengeful god-gone mad, although honestly the latter is pretty metal too. As may as Nathan, Kazemir, the all-knowing, although honestly the latter is pretty metal too.
Starting point is 01:03:05 As may as Nathan, Kazemir the all knowing, big bad beard of the mad and Eric McD, the petty kings and queens of Elderborn, not because they have any actual power, just because they're so petty it deserves a title. Burley T, Axel A, the Red Rain, Christian A, and J, Dragonborn, the other siblings of the other gods, but they're kind of just chill and don't get involved with the family drama. Everyone is cool with them. Jonathan O, the Sanjayan, Grant, Ben A, Feldonis and Dave H, mischievous leprechauns who steal your shoes, but just so they can fix them.
Starting point is 01:03:39 A pot of gold? More like a heart of gold. Katherine S. David K. Christian S. Keith K. and Brittany B. A bunch of sprites who are experiencing some crazy mood swings. The colors are changing rapidly and honestly it's kind of psychedelic so they might be doing it on purpose. Hannah W. Kyle H. Emilio D. Frankie Koala and Big Bad John. Some of the tricksters most devout followers, they line the pews in their church with whoopee cushions, and just go to town on them during the himnals. As in S, Blair, the bug Blair, Barbar, Blairian, Pork Chop, Channel M, and depressed demon hunter, proprietors of the under mountain tavern. Unlike the city though, this tavern is actually
Starting point is 01:04:22 under the mountain, you have to splong to get there, and there's a crisp, pilsner that's totally worth it. Alice, Minette F, Pat L, Lauren H, and Janina E, run a used spell bookstore, which in Elderborn is kind of like an animal rescue. The books are all so cute, none of them are bad, but some of them had bad owners and need to go to a patient home. Maddie Y, the eldest Barry, Ryan S and the bone duster, a bunch of werewolves who just crashed their neighbor's kids graduation
Starting point is 01:04:53 BBQ and pretty quickly tapped the keg and polished off the potato salad. Not cool, guys. Joshua H, Robert, CRSP, Ejrasil, Matthew K and Brent Lee C, the Reaper's Peepers. Since the Reaper isn't omnipotent, he hired some folks to keep tabs on the populous, but so far the peepers have been too cool to tell on anyone. Demar B, Micah B, Carly Ann, Clark of the Thunderfuck's, and Horhe C, a bunch of spurned lovers who returned as vengeful banshees, but then kind
Starting point is 01:05:27 of just formed this tight knit friend group and totally forgot that they were wrong. That's growth, baby. Oh yeah, that's all for this week, everybody. Thank you so much to all of our listeners and all of our Patreon subscribers and of course our benevolent counsel of elders. Benevolent? Oh yeah. You can add another to our Patreon.
Starting point is 01:05:45 I'll listen to our after show. That's patreon.com slash nad pod. Until then, we'll catch y'all next time. Bye, sweeties. That was a hit gun podcast.

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