Not Another D&D Podcast - Eldermourne - Ep. 2: Jabs and Hooks

Episode Date: October 23, 2020

Our new heroes deal with the aftermath of the mysterious horror's attack on Thornkirk. Fia adds a new book to her collection, Zirk gets a nickname, and Henry shakes off some ring rust. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content!Music / Sound Effects Include:"Club chatter, London" by mlteenie at Freesound.org."Rowdy Crowd" by xtrgamr at Freesound.org."Boginya, Fia Boginya" by Emily Axford."Into the Fire" by Emily Axford."Spare the Spritely" by Emily Axford."The Witch's Hut" by Emily Axford."Blackthorn Hall" by Emily Axford."The Lonely Autumn" by Emily Axford."A Friend For Life" by Emily Axford."Guardians of the Grove" by Emily Axford."Kingshammer" by Emily Axford."Fia" by Emily Axford."Henry" by Emily Axford."The Posse" by Emily Axford."Unknown Tome" by Emily Axford."Langston" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Welcome back to Elder Morn, everybody! I'm your Dungeon Master, Brian Murphy, joined by Jake Herwitz, Henry Hogfish. No, no rhyme for Henry. What's the point? Beautiful, what's the point? Then we've got of course Emily Axford Via Borgina lightly tasked and heavily masked. Yes. Yes. That's a garsmot That's good. And then of course we've got called a little Tanner. Oh

Zerg for Vane aka Zonk for Bina fighting horrors from dust till dawn and dreaming of going to coronercon. Oh, man. Maybe I'll do it around next week. These are good. These are real good. Yeah, that's gonna be that's gonna be the second arc is all that coronercon. Oh, man. I can't wait. I have read some first-hand accounts. It sounds corny. Someone did comment on our patreon that there are coroner cons and that they are in fact very horny. So we have to be true to the real life coroner con experience and make it horny and creepy. All right. I will go out of character and get horny. Great.

Everybody, let's go ahead and do a little recap. So last week, Fiya Boginia followed a mysterious horror through the woods who was killing sprites with its aura. At the same time, apprentice coroner Zirk Vervein examined a victim with a strange wound from those very same woods. After the autopsy, Zirk spoke to his mentor, Dr. Nebel, who was leaving that night. Nebel needed to get out of town quietly, so he hired the rooks. a local gang to help smuggle him out. Nebel was nervous that the rooks may hurt any witnesses at the docks, so asked Zirk to follow at a safe distance and help anyone who needed to be helped.

And that's what happened 10 out of 10, Zirk did a great job. No bumble. In that road. One of those witnesses ended up being Henry Hogfishfish a shipping clerk who was knocked out by the rooks and thrown in the bushes. Not knocked out put to sleep. But yeah, knocked out. Yeah, six and one half dozen of the other. Yeah. After nibble escaped, Zirk approached the two gang members and was promptly knocked out after very obviously lying to them about his name. The larger one, Fergus clearly wanted to kill him, but the smaller one, Sib, managed to

talk him down. Sib left a note to Zirk, saying that he owed them one. Fia, hot in the trail of the mysterious horror, ended up finding the two of them, hog-tied, along with Henry's faithful guard, Willie. You all joined up and went to a nearby watch tower to see if they had seen anything but found that the guards there had all been killed. After investigating the tower, you found a note on a dead messenger that read Nebel. We have been compromised. Don't get on the boat. The note obviously did not reach Dr. Nebel in time because his boat suddenly exploded and he was attacked by the same horror that Fio was chasing in the woods. The horror rang a bell which summoned the dead of the tower to rise as zombies and

attack. After an impressive display from our new heroes, the zombies were thwarted and rushed to the wreckage of the barge where the horror was nowhere to be found. However you did manage to find a book that Nebel left behind, pointed out to you by a dying sprite. The book read a Guardians of the Grove in Sylvan and was similar to the book that Fia's Blade Witch mentor Batilda had before she went missing. And that is where we are now. Okay. So, you are on the shores of the river near the smoldering wreckage of Dr. Nebels Barge. In Fias Hand is this book. It's incredibly well preserved, clearly protected by some kind of magic with brown leather and jewel inlets.

You see the last flickers of the sprite that pointed it out to you. Can I cast Sparrow the Dying on this sprite? Yes. So this sprite was already mechanically dead, but we'll say that with this clutch last second spear of the Dying, you can do a medicine check. Let's call it DC12 to inject some life into it and revive it.

Ooh, okay. So you see it's struggling. Zerk starts going to work, starts doing like mini chest compressions on this teeny little spray. The tiniest CPR I've ever seen. Actually, I use my tinker's tools to make two tiny little hands that I used to do CPR.

Look, Farah, this goes, this is the saddest, cutest thing I've ever seen. Lowercase CPR. I make a tiny little towel that I wipe my forehead with. Okay, not everything has to be tiny. You should use a regular sized towel on the forehead. I drink a tiny little towel that I wipe my forehead with. Okay, not everything has to be tiny. You should use a regular sized towel on the forehead. I drink a tiny little water bottle. You take a sip from your tiny water and work your tinkerers tools as the glow of the

sprite fades in and out. Come on, hang in there. Come on, pull through little sprites. I'm going to need someone to speak at the funeral for all these other sprites. I hold up all my dead sprites. Oh dear. Oh that's so sad. I hand Henry a tiny shovel. I'm not digging a tiny grave tonight. You got this. Well you can't use a regular size shovel. This is so depressing everyone. That's a 15. Alright. You see it spits up a tiny amount of water, like a tiny fountain of water. I catch it in a theme bowl.

You catch some sprites, spittles, disgusting. What a tiny coffee cup. And you see that the sprite begins glowing again to the point where it starts to just look like a whisk again, like a little orb. It's magical glow is so bright. And then it goes from blue to orange, which is kind of the normal color that they are at night when they're playful at stuff. And Fia is very magical and kind of is constantly surrounded by these sprites. And she's got all these spellbooks that they're interested in and everything. They're always kind of flitting near them, but Zirk you

Haven't been around as many sprites except for like there were always ones that were around Dr. Nebel and were around sort of the more like Fun little gadgets and everything you haven't really had sprites giving you a lot of attention since you were like a little kid But now you see this one sprites goes over and plops down on your ear and stays there. I wiggle my ear just to like bob it up and down. You see it bounces up and down on your ear, spins around, gives you like a halo of lights and then stays on your ear. Oh, I'm glad we were able to save someone. So, um, I don't know if I told you, but one of the people that died on this barge was my mentor, Dr. Nebel.

He's a doctor in town. I, well, I'd like to bury him or do some sort of memorial. I know there's no body, but would you like to help with that? I know we've got to bury these sprites as well. I got this tiny shovel. Um, but look, I should also tell you guys that, uh, that thing that killed your friend. I've seen that guy before. Really? What? Where? I came across him, um, when I was living in scale tip valley.

Scale tip. Have I heard of this? Yeah, you guys would know that scale tip valley is in inner burrow, which is south of outer burrow, along the same kind of river system that gets up here to Thorn Kirk. What was this figure doing there? Yes, what did you see them do? Well, you know, I was mind to my own business, just living there and one day that thing, it

got the jump on me, kicked the shit out of me and I woke up and it was, it's gonna sound weird, but it was, it was trying to like carve my shadow away from my body. That does sound very weird. Yeah, so anyway, I'm sorry that he killed your friend. We can do like a quick memorial thing, but then I'd love to get the fuck out of here, honestly. Oh yeah. Mr. Zork, Mr. Zork, may I ask you a quick question? Yes, of course. You see, Fiya is clutching the book that the Sprite have saved.

Mr. Zork, I want to know someone who had a very similar book to this. I was wondering if maybe instead of burying it, maybe I could borrow it. I think that Dr. Nebo would be happy for someone as adept in the magical arts as you'd have that book. Okay, thank you very much. I appreciate this. Another friend for the belt. Book our flabbs excitedly.

But you see, Volk starts freaking out the belt. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. I think I will keep this very special book clutched to my chest and not submit it to the whims and where his a vulcan fill up. I whisper to via, are you going to make that book talk? I don't know. The thing is about the book is it might already talk.

They are just very, they are guardians of secrets and they are very suspicious of people. So they do not give them up easily It's as possible. It has it Animation already, but you just have not seen it. I will find out though. I whisper hello to the book careful that will that while will umbit me Volk did you get away from the dealt get back in the build. Oh, that looks infected, sir. Hold on. No, that's just a cyst. Even still, we should lance that, bad boy.

You guys see, after a bit, Willie returns with about a dozen guards of the town watch in tow. You see he's running back in front of the line he goes don't worry friends I brought help. Oh look it's your superior. Equal, just not superior. I'm not even playing field. What help did you bring? You see behind him that there are about a dozen guards of the town watch including the inspector who Zirk you would know from working as a coroner, just kind of working with the local town watch. And you see she starts getting to work like investigating the scene and everything.

And you see Willie leans into you, Henry, and goes, but don't worry, I said we didn't see nothing. Perfect. thank you. And hey, thanks for living all those zombies to us, dude. That was a real heads up play, thanks, but. You see, he salutes you. The watch here and the inspector. Talk to you guys and just kind of ask what you saw. Do we trust, can I do it like an inside check?

Where are these people coming to ask questions? I yeah go ahead and do an inside check. I'll do one too. That's a Dirty 20 for me. Wow. Only got a 10 16 for me. So I would say Zirk would know this pretty well Zirk you know the inspector the inspector's name is Marcy. She's got kind of dark hair that is graying is Marcy. She's got kind of dark hair that is graying. She's got like a saber at her side. She's this very surly person who hates her job, who like a little bit of Henry Hogfish energy, but instead of having like given up is just like really pissed about it. Like she walks up. She's the burning bar. She goes like, God damn it. It's a fucking mess. Shit fuck.

See, Henry, you could learn from this don't be sad be mad yeah she looks okay way better off she's got a vein pulsing in her temple fuck and damn it shit the socks I'm so aware of her blood I press my temple and see if there's a vein there somehow there isn't there's no veins at all in your face. It's insane. She looks like her heart could explode at any time. That's how much love she has.

Yeah, she's just kicking at the bar. Oh, how are we gonna get this out? This sucks. I'm gonna be here all night. You guys would know enough about Thorne Kirk and its relationship with horrors. You would know that all the town watch can really do here is try to minimize damage during reaping season.

It's almost like a natural disaster. So the watch guards aren't horror hunters, they're not going to have much useful info for you so we don't need to play through you recounting everything, but let me know what info you do want to give to Marcy, because I will say you would know that the rooks have people embedded in the watch, probably not Marcy herself, but you can't be sure about the others. So yeah, I just quickly recap all this stuff about the horror and Dr. Nebel. Cool. She lets out a sigh, looks bummed about Dr. Nebel, but kind of waves you off.

Yeah, you guys can head out, we'll take it from here. Yeah, hey, Zirk, I guess look, we could do a little memorial service for your buddy for many where we're not, there's nobody to bury. That's true, uh, should we raise a glass somewhere maybe? At the very least? I could raise a couple glasses after, uh, after punching out some zombie birds, yeah, that sounds fun. Yes, I am particularly haunted by some of this information, so I would like to drown that feeling. All right, bottoms up. Copper dagger, or you know what, I know a great morgue. It's unoccupied at the moment. That would be preferable for me because I don't know many people in this town and the ones I do know, pretend they don't know me when I see them.

I gotta say the bar sounds cooler to me than the morgue. We can risk the bar, but I'm telling you that there are people who do not want to see me. What you got our place as well? That is cool. I mean, I do make a wonderful Sour Cherry cordial. Okay, if it's between Sour Cherry Corjol's

and the fucking morgue, I'll do the corjol's. Oh, I should warn you though, I do live in an abandoned train car. Of course, of course. Pre-trippy salad. And I have a bistro table, but only two chairs. Ditz. I have a bad, I have a low back, I have a lumbar issue.

I can see that on a stack of books. Sounds good. Zirk pretends not to be hurt. Okay, follow me. I clutch my book. Actually, I'm going to take out the binding of my breast and wrap it around the book that I found to try to stop up the wetness.

Okay. Clutch it to my chest and just walk in the direction and assume they will follow me. Sweet. Oh, she's going. She's just there. We go sprinting into the woods. Okay. to my chest and just walk in the direction and assume they will follow me. Sweet! She's going. She's just there, we go. Sprinting into the woods, okay. Fiat takes off sprinting.

Follow us! Bookfart takes off surprisingly fast. Wow! I run really fast. My long legs. This is bookfart, this is normal behavior because it only hangs out with Fiat. It's just like, fun, quickly, man. We need to win.

We need to win the race. Fias is a fast, tall, gangly, girl child. I'm just following the sprite that's attached to Zerks' ear. Yeah. Yeah, you see the sprite stays with Zerks and follows them around. I'm honored and this little beacon for me to follow through the woods. So you guys cross the bridge and go out into the woods. You see that the sprites have begun to congregate again, glowing orange before they were glowing

blue and they were kind of hiding because they were scared. Eventually you travel far enough to reach an abandoned train station overgrown with greenery. The small roof of the station has caved in. The tracks can be seen slightly poking out from under the green grass and foliage, but it's overgrown. There are plants and trees that have grown through the platform. You see the stone is all cracked and off level.

You guys know that about 20 years ago, the capital had attempted to build a massive railway system throughout the entire empire, but it ended up just not working out and all the trains and the burrows were abandoned. You guys see one last train car derailed, sitting off to the side of the old platform, covered in IV, all along the sides and rusted over. As you guys enter,

Fio, would you like to describe your band and train car? Okay, so this is a steam locomotive, right? Yeah. I'm going to say there is a nice, jangly, beaded curtain on the way in. So you get a little tangled in it, but it makes a pleasant jingle. As I said, there's like a little piece throw table with only two little mismatch chairs. There's probably like a tray for serving tea to guests and a humidor like I promise. And most importantly though, the walls are lined with books.

And of course, there's a in a steam locomotive, there's like a fire box, and I use that like a pizza oven. Does anyone want pizza? Yeah. Bookfire starts flapping dangerously close to the fire. Does anyone like being a make them some pizza? Yeah, I could go for some flat bread, that sounds great. Yeah, absolutely. I have feda and rose petal jam to put on it.

That's a spectacular, whatever you want. Some caramelized onions, well they are not caramelized just yet. Why did you say that so coily? Because an onion is so, it's so fun to caramelize. It's a slow process, but once it starts going, it's going. I mean, amen to that. It is chemistry of the kitchen, and I'm here for it. Fiya, you can, bookfarer is usually

a little bit more timid, and you could tell bookfarer is just like excited to show off to guests. Yeah, oh, I think also like all over, there's like little swaths of fabric that Fiya has maybe pilfered from various. She's definitely a collector of curiosity. So there's little swaths of fabric that someone threw out because they made a dress

but there was some leftover. So that kind of stuff, there's a patchwork feel to it. Yeah, I gotta say this is a lot more charming than the abandoned train car I had in my head when I found out we were going to the abandoned train station. So I must say this is slightly better than a morgue. You see bookfarb begins very sloppily putting together pizza toppings. toppings before has after the parking on the last bed a crumb of the fed up is smashing the fed up with the book just

uh... just uh... slamming the cover and the back together uh... slamming it and crushing the cheese as best again please let me help you no no no your guests your guests i mean in dessert mister zirke and mister henry and I say,

they know where the Fed comes from. Do I want to? One time I make bookfarbia goat and I take his milk. Yeah, so the answer to my question was no. I did not want to know that. These bookfarb's cheese. Bookfarb, you do not have to make too many pies. These are some book bars, cheese. Um, book bar. You do not have to make too many pies.

You've already done enough, sir. It's in the oven. It's in the oven. Don't worry most of the cheese is slid off. You see, this is the sloppiest, just like a toddler made a pizza bagel. He is my personal chef. Just too much sauce on one side, not enough on the other. Cheese, how has it really sprinkled?

All in the oven is definitely gonna burn. Didn't realize we were in the luxury car. Ha ha ha. But you see after a little bit of service, service you guys these terrible pizzas, and you all sit around together. Why are they terrible? This book far made them and he's a book.

He's a goddamn book. Can I at least enroll for him? Sure. Yes. You can roll this. You make a good pizza. How good a pizza your goddamn book makes. But do I add to it?

What do you add to it? Let's say dexterity. That's a four. Oh no. It's edible. It's somehow undercooked, even though he puts it in straight up fire for a bit. How is it? Tell me.

Yeah, it's raw and burned at the same time. How is that possible? No, it's good. Never tasted cheese that tasted like library before, now I have and it is weird, right? It's like I I saw him in him as a god and he had either still something poopy about his milk I Take book for a side don't I say it is okay to be bad at something that is how we learn and what we love to do We love to learn we love to learn miss. I'm while reading Zaw I

Turn to fear and say, um, so, uh, my mentor is dead and I was planning on learning a lot of healing and magic and alchemy from him. Miss Fia, you had such mastery over healing when we were fighting there. I've never seen someone cast a healing spell so quickly. Is there any way you could...teach me that? Absolutely. Mr. Zirk, when we were on the fight, you made all the enemies glow and turned the battlefield in our favor, so I would like to learn this from you. Of course, yeah.

I'm happy to exchange knowledge and pizza and friendship and good tidings. I throw the pizza over my shoulder. I was just, be a tig, so by the pizza, that's like a full pizza, just eats. I eat it without it. I eat it in a slice.

I just eat a pizza wheel. Bookfire is pulling a cookie monster and just slamming crunchy pizza, but it doesn't go anywhere. I whispered to Mr. Henry Mr. Zerg. She's letting him have this you know. He can have he can also have my piece if he's Mr. Henry you are indulging him and I very much appreciate this. May I ask you, Mr. Sark, I am very disconcerted by what has transpired with your mentor. I, too, once had a mentor, not for long.

But what was he called away to? I don't know. He was again being very secretive about it. He mentioned that he had some friends he needed to help. And that's about all I know. It must have something to do with that book. You said that your mentor had a book like that? Yes, she did. She had a book just like this.

And Henry, what about your mentor? You know, I, uh, No offense, you are a pretty old for a mentor, right? That's gonna say, I never, I never really had a mentor. So I never really, I never really learned very much. And now that I'm old, I don't think I have anything to teach anybody. So I couldn't really mentor anybody. But I mentor anybody but I'll just sort of I'll be happy to be around and watch you to mentor each other that's not true Mr. Henry I am clumsy with the blade and you are certain with your fist so I would learn fighting from you could you teach us how to punch birds Henry and he looks at his hands, covered in feathers.

He smiles for the first time. Yeah. Your lip is quivering like you're using a new muscle that you've not used before. What is this supposed to mean? I think he's sick from pizza. Henry's smile looks like a guy just bearing his teeth. I can't teach you to punch some birds. He's like a two-year-old when they first learned

to smile for picture. Guys, go ahead. As you guys chat, everybody give me insight checks. 18. 16. 14. OK, everybody, ooh, an insightful crew for once, as you guys are chatting and kind of thinking about all of your individual circumstances, you all have a strange connection to this weird horror that cut down Dr. Nebel.

You realize the next step in solving this mystery is knowing where they were going, and the only people who would know would probably be the rooks because they were the ones taking him there. It is common knowledge around town that they hang out in a giant saloon and gambling hall called Black Thorn Hall. So, Mr. Zerke, since this person left a note saying, you owe me one, why don't we go talk to this person? Yeah, you know, of the two, Sib would. Why don't we go talk to this person? Yeah, you know of the two, uh, Sib would be the one I'd want to talk to. I owe them a favor and

they didn't hit me in the head with a hammer. So yeah, we could try talking to Sib. So we call it a night, we meet up again tomorrow and and we head over there and we try to give that rook a favor. Yeah, it might be good for me to check in at work tomorrow. So then after I'm done, we can go at night. That would be great. Okay, and I, with your permission, Mr. Sir, I will look through this book. Oh, yes, absolutely. I don't believe I can read it. So if you can glean some knowledge from it, that'd be fantastic. Okay, thank you. Sweet.

So are you guys staying here? Are you going to go to your separate places? Oh, we do have a couple of cuts. It's like a tiny house. They fall down from the wall. I can sleep up to six according to the Airbnb listing. I mean, it is a sleeper car. That's true.

And my cousin's not expecting me home. I usually do the graveyard shift, so I can crash for a little bit. Feel free. Oh my gosh, I'll put a couple more pizzas in the oven. Starts full after that. Make one breakfast pizza. Make one breakfast pizza, you want to make it? No cheese, non-flets.

Can I just do one non-dairy? Just start cracking the eggs like cooking monsters mouth Spill maybe okay. Oh, there's a lot of shell in there Don't worry. I'm an expert chef. I know how to make breakfast pizza. It's a speed so happy to help you Okay, again, I was gonna say do you wanna know where the eggs come from? Yeah, okay So I know that they came from the book not a chicken. I turned book far into a chicken. Yeah, that's what I... I will just... Can I just have the just the... the bread from the pizza? That's all I want. You just trying cracker. You just want raw dough. You can cook the dough. All right, one breakfast pizza, nothing on it at all, coming up.

Perfect. Sweet. Is there anything you guys would like to do as you go to bed for the night? Before we go to bed, I go over to Henry and say, so about that bird punching lesson, I don't have a bird on hand, but I pull out my hat, which is covered in these weird alchemical runes, and it is actually a hat of vermin. Wow.

And using a charge, I produce a bat from inside the hat. Oh, God, I thought we would maybe do this tomorrow, fuck. Oh, God. I see this and I say, why did you make more bats? And I point to the ceiling and there's already a couple of bats hanging up there. You think I not have any bats? Oh, wow. And you're cool with those. Absolutely. Yeah. Well, maybe maybe don't punch the real bats. Okay, this one's a fake bat. This is a magical bat. Okay. I guess I shadow box near the bat to try to teach their I think Fiya is watching this from afar Using a little sprite as a book a book light

And she is happy to have the company of something other than books for a change But I think she is also going to Open up this little book that she found. Sweet, go ahead and give me a history check. This will kind of just be like a research check essentially. 12 plus 6 is 18. Fia, is there anything in particular that you're looking for? I think Fia is her heart is a bit heavy from this. I mean she presents a strong self-sufficient witch but in this moment huddled over this book you see she's little more than

a sprout of a woman so I think she is not thinking so logically she's maybe perhaps crambling for some kind of hints she's very worried about her witch now. Yeah, Fiya, as you look through this book, you get deja vu to being a young girl and flipping through the witch's book, kind of as a secret. Like, you would go and kind of steal it from her. She knew I was stealing. She knew you're stealing. She encouraged this kind of trickery. And you see that it is a bestiary of horrors and how to hunt them much like what your witch had. Then I look for something about the bell. You look through and as you see the different classes of horrors and whatnot. You do find in the back that Nebel has added notes and you see the sketch of a man that looks like the horror

that you saw. But you see this one looks to be hand drawn with notes scribbled in the margins. It lists the creature's ability to kill sprites with its aura, that it has an undead mount. It's got this summoning bell, and most concerning, it doesn't have any known weaknesses. Everything else has ways to deal with the horror, ways to kill the different horrors. This picture is just labeled with the word profit.

Fia's breath quikens and her palms sweat with anger. All right, kid. I'm on another bat. Henry has his shirt off, he's sort of bobbing it with me. Bad number two, come in your way. Here we go. Just real quick, that was not one of my bats, right? Pretty sure. I don't think so.

60% it evaporated into dust. I'm watching the bats. I'm watching the bats. I'm fond of the bats, so if everyone could stay away from the bats, it's actually very upsetting. Bookfarts start to get a little upset. Okay, I'll tag the bats. I'm watching the bats. I'm fond of the bats. So if everyone could stay away from the bats, it's actually very upsetting. Book Vars start to get a little upset. Okay, I'll tag the bat. I'll tag this bat. Yeah, you all have not seen it yet, but Book Vars does sleep hanging from the ceiling like a bat. Please, I've really taken to these bats. If you could put little hats on your bats, so we know the difference. Or maybe we

could spray paint them. Zirk uses his tinkers tools to create a tiny hat for this bat. I mean, do you have a dollhouse at home you are so good with miniatures. It would be a wasted talent if you did not. You also see, Fiya, that amongst all this other stuff in Dr. Neville's book, it looks like he wasn't a blade himself, but was of the same order, the guardians of the Grove, and you see a quote that says, the Smith forges the blade.

The Smith forges the blade. And you know from conversations that you've had with your old mentor, that there were Smiths who would use their, you know, knowledge to help the blades in some way, whether it be by teaching them or whether it be like, in Dr. Nebels case, use a doctor. He could have literally done what he was doing in town, but specifically for hunting horrors or something.

Mr. Zirk, I think your doctor was a smith. They work with the blades. Really? One second, I toss another bat at Henry and then I come over to Fia. I blindfold myself. I think he had a secret profession. What are the Smiths?

They work with the blades, the blades hunt the horrors, and the Smiths help the blades. Seems pretty self-explanatory. Did you know this about him, or did he not wear this on his sleeve? The only thing he wore on his sleeve were several little sprites that danced happily and galey upon them. So... Sprite cufflinks, I love them. Yeah. But, no, we never mentioned the secret life.

Mmm, this nebul grows more and more kiarious. Yeah, we gotta get to the bottom of this. I feel like I got to honor his memory, whatever way I can. So you guys all go to bed for the night in Fias, cozy, tiny house. You awaken at 2 p.m. I awaken at 155 to admire the breathing bodies of my companions. Usually I spend all of my days with books. It is so nice to have heat producing bodies.

Yeah, Zerke stayed up in extra four hours, just like fucking around, like Fia's books and whatnot So he is absolutely passed out right now. Yeah Just being super loud at night the books are telling you to stop Yeah, Philip Fia's high-level spell book goes dude go to fucking bed man. I'm not tired. You're so loud Dude I want to talk to book for I I'm trying to sleep, sir. What is it?

Sleeping on the ceiling. I'm sleeping on the ceiling with the bats, and they're all freaked out by how many bats they saw get punched tonight, even though they weren't able to get. Henry slept with one eye open watching the bats. I know you're plotting something revenge. You're just quite full bugs screeching and echolocating you.

I'm fucking bugs. I pet each one's head and whisper you're not the book. I do not want to hear a bug. You're not a bug. He says you're a bug. I don't think you're a bug. Definitively not bugs. So yeah, you guys have all woken up. It is mid afternoon. You went to bed. Super,

super, super late. After this whole debacle, is there anything you guys would like to do before heading to Black Thorn Hall? I've got to stock my spells for the day. Oh, sweet. Fia takes some time and goes over spells. I guess I'll check in at work, see what's going on. See what the fallout from Dr. Nebel's death is. Zirk, you stop by your workplace. You see that the inspector is there just kind of interviewing everybody, finding out what's going on. You see that there is another doctor in that was supposed

to show up on this day anyway. So the patients will be taken care of. For now, it is closed. There's a little sign on the window that says, opens back up tomorrow. It looks like people are very sad and devastated, but it does look like people know that this is horror-related. So this isn't like, oh no, a murder is on the loose.

It's like, we live in a world where zombies exist. This was one of the unfortunate victims of living in this horror world. So things are, people are sad, but they accept these horrors as their reality. I guess I have the day off. I'm gonna swing by my place and kind of get like a change of clothes, which is just a new shirt, and I don't really change anything else. Henry, you swing by the place that you're staying. You go in like a back entrance,

so you don't really have to deal with anyone. There's like a couple of guards out front. Hey, but they wave you in. You go in the back entrance. You change your clothes, and you all meet back up as night falls outside of Blackthorn Hall. Mr. Henry, I forgot to ask you. Last night you made me a promise there was sort of a bond offered. You said if one thing goes your way, I will have a friend for life. Would you say one thing went your way?

You know I guess I'd say I'd say a couple things went my way. I even like the pizza. Well don't say that in front of book far. I'll make some more tonight. Oh well. What I'm trying to say is yeah I'll be I'll be your friend for as long as you want me to. All right, then. Couple things went your way. Couple friends for life. Interesting. Fiya, you see as you make this like deal with Henry, you see a bunch of sprites. Friendship is to be bartered for. That's what I learned from books. friendship is to be bartered for that's what I learned from books. You see a few sprites swirl around the two of you and make a little connection with like two branches. I think they like you.

That is I think the first time they've ever showed a positive light around me. Oh well I think that that is since sprites and fairies and what not are so into trickery, whenever you make a promise, that means a lot and there are dire consequences. So I guess what just happened there is that you made an oath to Miss Fia. We made an oath of friendship. I get it now. Okay. no going back on that. All right then, Oli and Hazar, do you want to be in Ande's or Kuska? I look at my little sprite that I imagine is still hanging out and say, we want in on this. You see the sprite swirls around and connects a new magical branch. So there's a three way branch between the three of you.

Yeah, what the heck, I'm pretty lonely too, why not? Oh, dear, we are in it now. Has anyone ever been to this gambling casino before? Absolutely not, I take the wide berth any chance I get. I also tend to avoid that spot, but we've got an in. We know, Sib. We are going to go in and say, hello, we know Sib.

Vodka go wrong. So you all arrive outside of Black Thorn Hall as the sun sets. You arrive and see a bunch of rough and tumble-looking folks spilling out of this massive saloon You can see cigar smoke Wafting out from inside I like my own of course. You let your own as you walk in

As you guys walk in you see that you are on the second floor balcony of a huge open room On the second floor balcony of a huge open room, you look down and see that on the first floor, there is a rowdy crowd gathered around a boxing ring with thick ropes. One boxer pummel's another in the corner while the crowd goes wild, waving tickets and making bets. Up here on the second floor, tough looking folk puff cigars and drink ale at a bar, smacking each other on the back and laughing at smaller tables, overlooking the balcony. You see the more kind of serious people speak quietly. Their faces lit by the dull glow of sprite lamps. You see several of them have tattoos like Sib had, like the tattoo of this

rook of this black bird, clearly visible, and they wear black cloaks. Everybody as you guys enter, give me a perception check. That's a 17. That's a 7 for me. 14 for me. So with a 17, you all see a bunch of rooks around and Henry you see Sib, Slicked Back, Black Hair, Rook Tattoo, and a Black Cloak is hanging over the edge of the balcony watching the fight. Very reckless. Winsing with each you see one boxer is pummeling the other one. Sib is wincing with each punch that the loser is taking. And then you see when the fighter is knocked out, you see they throw their ticket.

Like looks like they just lost a big fight. I think that's who you owe a favorite to. They don't seem to be in that grade of a mood. That's them, yeah. Let's go talk. Do you want to go speak to them them by yourself or do you want us to come with you? We can be casual. I'm not great with social interaction, I usually hang out with books and the page is very different than the face, but...

Yeah, I spend most of my time with dead people, so similarly not great. I am generally disliked upon being met as well. You see, you see bookfars also here, a flapping and goes, should we try to fit in, should we get like a white wine spritzer or something? So that we absolutely, absolutely amazing. Even I know that is absolutely the wrong thing to do, I get a bookvar, a white wine spritzer, because that's just too cute. Hold it with your bookmark, Hold it with your bookmark. Hold it with your bookmark. I'm trying, miss.

I'm trying, spilling everywhere. Oh my God, he's showering us. We're just constantly casting the mending can for Pazzie drinks. Thank you for taking over that. I have to say thank you so much. I can't. Oh, sure, yeah.

Your hand looked a little tired. Yeah, you guys get like wine spritzer for book fire, but then are able to get just like ails and stuff for yourself throw a couple copper to the certainly bartender. I get a very dark stout and I light up a big stinky cigar. I want a very smoky scotch. No no rocks. I get a No, no rocks. I get a high ball of pure vodka, but then I use magical tinkering to put a rainbow illuminated ice cube in it,

like they give you a Disneyland. Very good. Actually, can I get another high ball of vodka and put another rainbow flashing ice cube in it and then walk over to Sib. Great. You walk over to Sib. Great. Ooh. You walk over to Sib. You see Sib has just kind of, as the bell rings, this fight ends.

Sib clearly has just lost, throws a ticket, looks super pissed off, starts walking, is looking down, and then looks up and sees you, Zirk, and kind of stops in their tracks. Hey, tough loss. But yeah, what's up, Dr. Zonk? You told me your name was Zerk. You're supposed to be my friend for life. I've been calling you Mr. Zerk. I'm so sorry. Have I been using your name wrong?

No, it's an nickname. It's called an nickname. His name wrong. Ah, fuck off. No, it's a name. It's a name. It's called a name. It's a name. It's a name. It's Dr. Zonk, because that's what he said his name was. Okay, well, learn a new name. Oh, okay.

I stare unblinkingly. Listen, I know I put you in a tight spot the other day. I'm here to make it up to you, and I hand them the drink. Weird cube, but um, yeah, what the hell. Throw it back real quick and then just kind of tosses the glass on the ground. Very, very, very, so reckless and just really think it's cool. Yeah, I am really reckless. You see this, they light up a second cigar, they're smoking two cigars. Wow, you're all weird. That's so weird. It's like elephant tusks. Yeah, so I had to deal with fucking Fergus

Talking all night. I'll fucking blue balls that he didn't get the fucking violence that he wanted You got him all fucking hyped up to kill somebody and then I have to talk to that fucking dude for like four hours I'd hang out with him He tried to get in a fight and every fucking bar we went to It sucked. So you owe me let's say 20 gold per hour that I had to fucking listen to it So let's say 80 gold round it up. Let's say a hundred gold. Let's call it a hundred gold. Yeah, it's that kind It's that kind of favor. 100 gold because you had to hang out with Fergus. Yeah He would have just talked about regular shit if we didn't have to tend to you

Doctor, Zonk all right fair enough. So I'll take my gold right now unless Any of you can fight in which case we can make a lot more than that. I My pupils shift towards Henry. Yeah, I was gonna say I give an elbow to the spine of Henry Okay, well like that. You know, I thought you had a box a little bit last night, too, right? So I Oh, no, I was I was in charge of the bat hat if you'll recall Yeah, Zonk was I mean Zerk Zonk was really busy making sure we knew which were fake bats and real bats Yeah, because if you'll recall the bats bats didn't wanna wear the tiny hats,

so I had to sew them on. Well, I didn't sew them on, I like sewed on a little like. I was so barbaric. What the fuck? What the fuck are you maniacs talking about? So, are you fucking talking about? Do any of you fight? Yeah, look, here's the thing.

I will, I'll go in that ring, and I'll earn you some money. You throw a little extra down, we can earn you more than a hundred gold. And if we can do that, if we can get you more than a hundred gold, then maybe you do us one small favor in return. All we're looking for is some information. Information, what kind of information? We just don't need to know a destination.

This is all. You want to know where your doctor was going last night? Okay, you saw something out of us. Yes, this is what we are looking for. I told you they were smart. Right. Didn't I tell you guys? I think about the rooks is everybody plays everything close to the chest.

So there's only one person alive who knows where Nebel was heading, and that's the boss. You see the gesture towards a table in the corner with a bunch of rooks around it. And you see at the center is a woman who looks weirdly more intimidating by how not threateningly she is dressed. She wears a pristine white hoop dress with black trimming, long white gloves and a white hat. At her side is a closed parasol that she holds to the side like a cane. Oh damn. I should have brought my Parisol. And Sib goes, the boss was actually interested in speaking to you too anyway. You see they point to Zerkin Fia so if you all want to go talk to

her, while me and this guy go down to the ring, I can arrange that. Sounds fantastic. Henry, are you okay with that? Yeah, you know, fuck it. Mr. Zirk, do you have any um oils you could rub on Henry's fists and also Sib, I was wandering. I've never been to this fighting pit before. How obvious is it that someone is buffed with magic? If you do it ahead of time, then you can usually get away with it. If you're cheating mid-fight, which I am not above, you do not seem above it nor am I. No. In fact, I think cheating is awesome. Takes a big puff of their cigar. OK, that actually was a step further. When did you get a third cigar?

I only take one puff of each one. Throws out the two cigars. A small five starts. Take that one, boy. My friend, you are making quite a mess. Yeah, I got a cigar problem. And I need to make a lot of money to make up for it. I think my friend, Fiya, can relate. Yeah, look, if the ref catches you, they call it off and you get

disqualified. Everybody who bet on you knows that you lost the fight and will take it out on you. Interesting. I'm looking through my book for the day and I think if I'm going to help Henry at all, it's going to have to be in the moment. Hmm. I haven't used any of my infusions yet for the day. Okay. What I want to do is I'm going to cast Enhanced Weapon on Henry's Fist. Okay. Okay. Will you allow that? Yeah. What is it? What does it do? So the Alchemy infusions are basically like it just gives them a plus one bonus to attack grand rolls. Sweet. So yeah, I think I will take some of that Iker from yesterday and I'll just kind of mix it together in a little flask. And then I kind of rub it into his hands like a hand lotion. Thanks for the hand

massage, Zonk. You, uh, Dr. Zonk, you just randomly started rubbing goo on your friend's hands there. It's absolutely, yeah. They were looking a little dry. Cool, great. Do you want some? No, not it fucking all. Okay, so,

Fair enough. What's your name, by the way? Henry, Henry Hogfish. You look old as shit. So if we get you out there, there's gonna be a lot of people betting betting against you and if you win for me. I'll make a lot of money But if you lose for me Lean's in close and whispers don't fucking lose for me. Okay Yeah, I hardly ever lose and I look suspicious

My name is Fia bonkidia Go ahead and make a deception check Fia That's gonna be a minus one to whatever I rolled I I got a zero that's going to be a third T zero Third zero you see sip a filthy zero pulls out a dagger and holds it to your throat and goes how do you know my last name was bonk Ginnia You think you have something on me you don't have shit on me you don't know me nothing I'm simple look as far as you're concerned you you understand? I'm not doing anything. You don't have shit on me. Okay.

Don't say the last name. Okay. Bok-Gin-Yah. I'm not part of that family anymore. So, Sib, keeping their eyes on Fia, backs up, holds the dagger up threateningly, as they lead. I try to resolve the situation by throwing them thumbs up as I walk away. Shakes their head each time.

You see they nod to a rook goon. There's just big bald headed burly dude who comes over and goes, you want to talk to the boss at the earliest convenience. Grab you guys and brings you guys over to the table. Henry and Sib, go downstairs, Henry. You see Sib has you sit in an area with like a couple other fighters. You see people are taping up their hands.

You see Sib goes and talks to a few people to like make arrangements for your fight and then Sib comes over and helps you start getting ready. Like takes your coat off, you got the tank top on underneath. You see Sib grabs your hand and starts like shaking your arms out. All right, you're a champ, you're a fucking champ, you're going to kick these two zasses. Yeah, you're an old looking dude, so you're gonna go out there and people are gonna bet so much money against you and I'm gonna bet for you and we're gonna win so much cash, we're gonna win so much cash. We're fading in and out of a pep talk here. That's right. Yeah, okay. You're gonna go out there, you're gonna look sickly, you're gonna

look sickly. I'm just like looking right now, but you're gonna pop them, you're gonna pop them because you can why don't you don't look like you can but you can do it. You don't look like them because you can, why don't you, why don't you just sit here, but you can do it. You don't look like you can, and let's just leave it on. I'm having a hard time believing it, looking at you, but you're gonna do it. Uh, thank you, maybe.

Sib starts taping up your hand and goes, don't worry, I got you a warm up fight. I got some pull down here. I got you a warm up fight. I'm not gonna be able to make a lot of money off that one, but we'll get a good showing and we'll get you a respectful opponent for the second one. Okay. Meanwhile, so Zirk and Fiya, you all are led over to this table full of all of these rooks, these menacing-looking goons. Amongst them, you do see Fergus, who is the dude who knocked you out

last night with his hammer. Oh yeah. I stand in front of Zurg. If you come and buy to finish what we started last night, why don't we step outside? Okay, he saw you, I tried. And you hear the woman pipe up and go, Fergus, why don't you leave us alone for a minute? And you see Fergus looks pissed off, but sort of just snorts angrily and does that tough guy thing where he like pushes his nose, whatever, and walks away. That sounded stupid. These are examples of laugh.

You see, she shoes away. Some of her other goons. You see just the one bald one standing to the side. You sit down and join her and she goes, hello, my name is Madame Whitlock and from my understanding you have a history with some of my associates. Yes ma'am, it is written on my face. They are very capable, and I pass along. My congratulations to you on choosing such potent employees. You have a good hiring process. He's trying to say. Thank you. Well, Fergus is my brother, so didn't hire him. Nepotism, I won't hold this against you. Go ahead and give me A charisma check for you.

Oh no! Really? You know it's gonna be your minus one, do it. You! A six. Oh no. You see, very well composed, but kind of sneers at that for a moment and goes, Sib told me all about you. You're a doctor, Zonk, I believe?

Sure, yeah. Dr. Zonk, that's me. And then she turns and looks at Fia and goes, you live on the edge of town, do you not? Yes, I do. I live in an abandoned rail car, but I'm also quite a good healer. And you knew Batilda? I did not know her long, but I miss her like I did. Then I may have used for both of you. I have information that you might be interested in,

and you have services that I could make use of. I fear there is a horror who is hunting rooks. Several of my associates have dropped dead recently from unknown causes. We clean up our messes here, so none of it was officially reported, but I'm beginning to get concerned. I assumed the first one was a heart attack. A person just died without any visible wounds. The victim was young, but we live a hard lifestyle.

I didn't think it was that strange, but after the third body piled up this week, I began to have my doubts. I'd planned on financing an independent autopsy or trying to find a horror hunter, and it just so happens that you've both stumbled into my establishment. So I have a proposition for you. We have a victim from last night in our freezer, and I would like for you to take a look at it. If you need someone who says cause of death, last night, Zonk told me like 400 different causes of death.

Yeah, there's a lot of them. Grambled them off. Falling down the stairs, falling up the stairs, happens less often, but it does happen. Falling stairs can fall on somebody. Bleeding out, puking out, pooping out, pissing out. Also pooping in, pooping in. Yes, I've read, yeah, that's a wild one. I've read your mentor's book that you're

supposed to bring to the bathroom. That's 5,000 ways to die. And it has all. It's very clever and kind of. It was turned into a pop song, popular at weddings. Very funny. Anyway, we're assuming it's some kind of horror. If you could find out what it is, what is killing my associates

and deal with it. I'll tell you where your doctor was headed. I will accompany the doctor in this. We'll do our best. You see, she motions to one of her goons who leads you back to a hallway. This episode of NAD pod is brought to you by Bird Dogs. They're a company that makes pants and shorts, so no matter where you fall and the age old battle between the two, you can rest assured that Bird Dogs has you covered.

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You won't want to take your bird dogs off, we promise you. Okay, that's it for me. Go team pants and enjoy the show. Then we're going to cut over to Henry. Henry, you seen a few fights go at this point. You've got your hands all taped up. You see Sibb is rubbing your shoulders. You've got to look like shit, but you've got to kick their asses, all right? You've got to look like shit. Maybe we just style it in sick and silence, like brooding silence. That would be breathable. Openery's okay. You see a referee stands in the middle of the ring, a gruff shortman with a newsboy cat

puffing a cigar and goes, alright, alright, place your bets, place your bets in the blue corner. We got just motions over towards Henry's general direction as Henry and Sib go to the blue corner and goes, whoever the fuck this guy is, what's your name, old man? Hank Hogfish. Hank Hogfish. Go ahead and give me a charisma check. No, wait.

At least you have a zero, right? Yeah, but I did roll a five. A five? You hate to say a nickname for Henry, though. You hear a chorus of booze. Okay, hey, I know that guy We work at the taxes. He's Henry's trying to give him some a fucking nickname That's right. Yeah, get him to think you're fucking pathetic. Get him to think you're fucking pathetic Starting to know to feel fucking pathetic. Fias voice echoes don't be sad be mad.

Oh, and you hear the referee continues and at the red corner we got fan favorite for getting his ass kicked in style glass Willie. You see Willie from last night. No, a hundred pounds soaking wet scrawny and shirtless with taped up hands begins dancing back and forth Don't take it easy on me mr. Clerk you've already you've got like four black eyes. I don't even know how that's possible I thought three times tonight. I'm zero and three tonight, but if I keep fighting I might be one in three Okay, let's just you know take it take a dive if you need to, all right? All right.

Let's see some fucking blood. Bring it on, come on. The referee throws his hands down. You hear the bell rings and you go and you meet Willie in the middle. I'm going to tell you how this fighting ring is going to work. All right. So Henry, this is based on something from Cobald Press. The way we're gonna do this, instead of doing initiative

and going back and forth, this is best of five rounds. You can also get knocked out. You're gonna roll a contested athletics check. If you lose the round, you have to do a con check to not get knocked out. Okay. Different fighters have different do a con check to not get knocked out. Different fighters have different things that they add to it. Willie does not look particularly skilled.

Sib looks like they just want to try to build you up. All right, this one's probably going to be a close one, but I think you're going to squeak it out. You don't squeak anything at all. So Henry, you have rusty skills, so you add a D4 to your athletics check as you fight. So you and Willy meet in the middle, Willy starts swinging, go ahead and make an athletics check. So that's a 28. Oh my God!

You see Willy dances back and forth. Come on, Mr. Clerk, don't take it easy on me. And you just sock him directly in the head. You see his head flops back. He got a 12. So he, did you see a 28? Yeah. So he lost by 16.

So he has to do a DC. It's the amount you lose by plus 10 to stay up. So he has to do a DC 26 to knock it instantly knocked out. Oh, Henry, I tried to aim away from his memories. He got, he got a legit Matt one. So he's, he flies out of the ring. You suck him so hard. He just goes down.

The momentum flips him back over over and he cartoonishly flies over the rope. You hear the crowd goes wild. Willie, Willie, Willie, Willie, Willie, they like them. Did he lose? People love another dog. Don't take it personally. The bell starts ringing. Willie is out. That is the end of the first fight. The ref lifts your wrist. You see they were cheering for, they love seeing Willie get his ass kicked. He's got so much fun. Can you see Willie pos back up? He's okay. He's a little tased, but he's okay. You told me not to take it easy on you. You did say that. You almost killed me, sir. I'm gonna go not go to sleep tonight.

I'm gonna have somebody watch me. I am so sorry. I'm so sorry. I should check on really after this. You see, Syp pulls you into the corner. You sit down in the stool, start rubbing your shoulders and goes. All right, this next one's not going to be quite as easy, but I'm confident that you're going to squeak this one out. It's going to be pathetic, but you're going to squeak it out. Thanks for the pep talk. Just maybe, maybe just like clap your hands or something and don't say words next time. And you see the ref goes, and no now we got the reigning champion, Hank Cogfish in the red corner. Let's bring out a new challenger in the blue corner. We got an old favorite Sullivan the specimen. You see a short, a short dude, a couple inches shorter than Henry, but like big and built with a mush stash,

bald kind of like Bronson energy. Okay. It's got like suspenders on with no shirt underneath. It's a real good look. Starts taking a, puts the dukes up underhanded. Looks like a much more formidable foe. Okay. Siblin's in and goes, this one is about

weather in the storm early. He's got those big muscles, all right? It takes a lot of oxygen to keep him going. So you survive the first couple rounds and you got this, all right? You got this. It's gonna look dumb. It's not gonna look pretty,

but you're gonna get the job done. I can tell you have to work on these. Just go practice in the corner. You hear the bell ring? As you guys go to meet in the middle, and then we are going to cut over to Fia and Zirk, aka Zonk. Diary of the butt, diarrhea of the mouth, diarrhea of the ears, those are also ways that you can die.

Diary of the, what comes out of the ears? Is it ear facts, body diarrhea or is it actual diarrhea? Um, you know what, scientists are still debating that to this day. Probably something they talk about at Coronercon, right? You guys are led back through a hall, through a kitchen, where you see a bunch of kitchen workers, you see this one. I smile amicably at all the kitchen workers. You see, a couple people give you friendly nods. A few people are like confused.

Like, do we know this person? Are they our friend? They give you a wave. I usually hang out with books. People are new and exciting. Great. You've got to stop leading with that fear. I know.

I know. I know. Just don't, you know what? They'll assume you're nice. You look nice. You're nice to be around. You don't have to say the book thing Okay, good to learn thank you. You know what I'm just realizing I forgot to eat today See this is why I make friends with the kitchen workers. Hi can we possibly get you know a little a little a moose bush

Just a nibbles were we're about to do some hungry work. Yeah, you see the goon goes, give him a fucking a moose bush. I just like, hold up. It's tough to one of the kitchen workers. Yes sir, yes sir. Runs and... See, all because I smile.

Oh, great. Well done. Ooh, grabs you some blue cheese stuffed olives. LAUGHTER And you see this goon, leads you guys back through a hallway through the busy kitchen and to a freezer. It's not a proper freezer. There's nothing electrical here. It's just a dank seller and you can tell that it is being artificially cooled by some kind of magical means. You see frost collecting on the stone walls. You see the rook, Goon kicks out a kitchen worker who is working in here, then stands at the freezer door,

just kind of leaning up against it, keeping it open and motions for you all to go in. This is dangerous, right, Dr. Zerke, to go into a freezer. They could close it on us. They sure could. I'm glad you're here to think about things like that. Bookfargus, do you want me to stand outside or fly outside? Yes, Bookfar. And make sure if we get, you know, fucked up that you have all opened the door for us.

All right, I'll talk to this Goon about my pizza making style. Or maybe I'll help out in the kitchen. Oh, that's a great idea. You hear a bookfire flaps away. I just, you instantly hear chaos. As we walk in, can I take a look at, let's call them Spritele for now, to see what they think about this scene,

how they're reacting color-wise. Spritele is blue. Spritele is a little scared. Sprydle likes to be outside with friends, not with scary people and freezers. You will learn, they are blue, then they are sad, and they are scared. It's very confusing because they're

such different emotions. Okay, Sprydle's bummed out, so let's make this quick. I'm happy to be in a freezer, I run hot. You guys, yeah, Fiya, you can finally take your cloak off, it's really nice. This is a little toasty compared to the morgue, honestly. You guys walk past huge haunches of meat hanging on hooks, and you find at the other end of the room

a body covered in a black bag. I cast guidance on Dr. Zerr. Great, thank you Miss Witch. Zerr, you are enchanted with magic power. I tie my hair back into a ponytail, put on my gloves, and I unzip the bag. Sweet, you unzip the bag. Unbutton it, I don't know if they have zippers.

Yeah, you unbutton it as it is a button body bag. Save the button. So it's a nice button. Yeah, it's intrigently made. This is beautiful. I don't know why they haven't gone into business. The embroidery on this is outstanding. Body bags. I mean, they put so much care into them. You see that this body is a man covered in tattoos head to toe, including one from the rucks. So, this is indeed one of Madame Whitlock's associates. Tell me what you are looking for and Fiya, if you're doing anything, let me know what you're doing as well.

So, I know from Madame Whitlock that this person died of a heart attack or something similar to that. They just dropped dead. Correct. Yeah. You see no visible wounds on like first glance. Do you need me to cut them open? We're going to get there. I'm going to need you to make a big t-shaped incision real soon. But for now, let's just do kind of a preliminary check. I guess I'll just do maybe an Arcona check to see if I can sense anything eldritch or otherworldly that's kind of lingering. Okay.

That's going to be, ooh, 21. 21. Old enough to drink. Zerke, as you open this body bag and begin to examine it, you feel a cold breeze passed through you, and not just the kind of coldness of the freezer. You feel like a wind. Woo!

Did you feel that? Afea, you did feel it. It's like a ghost for me. I did feel it, which is strange, because like I said, I run hot. Yeah. Can I do an arcana check on this strange cold wind? Sure.

17. 17. It could be some kind of magic leftover, some kind of like force field diminishing or it could be like a spirit or something. It was either their spirit or residual magics. Do you think that maybe, you know, like normally when you die, you evacuate your bowels? Do you think the ghost was evacuating its ghost bowels? And that's what we were feeling.

You know, honestly, doctors are a guy don't. Okay. See, the thing about science is you have to explore every possibility and you slowly cross out and eliminate those This is not here the scientist and I'm the Vichino. You can't have a blade without a smith and vice versa. I'll say that All right No more evidence outside. We might need to get cut in so in the interest of not being too gory Why don't we just say that Zirk has an instrument that's almost like an arcane x-ray. So Zirk, you hold like a very like steam punky kind of looking wand.

Can I like draw a circle on the body? And then like, oh, that's shimmers. That's fucking right. Yeah, that's what you do. Yeah, you have some like arcane paints that you use to make a rune across this person's chest. You hold your hand over it. Do not lick this. You mix some powder in your hands and then blow it into the runes and you see that their chest becomes transparent and you see that there is missing heart a missing heart how did you

get it it just feels like a good story I was hoping for it you just see that this person is missing a heart and there's no damage. Like, it's just the heart is just gone. As soon as the woman said heart attack and it mysteriously happened three times, I thought for sure this is what something is doing. Are the ventricles like perfectly cauterized? Can I see that? It doesn't look like this, it doesn't look like a cut, it looks like it's something different than the profit. Yeah, it looks like something different than the profit. Mmm. I learned that I've hit to Vasa Broke and promise.

Is that a common sort of exchange that occurs? You know, I do not know. I mean, it sounded good. As you guys are examining this body, you suddenly hear the meat hooks behind you, starting to jingle. Oh, I almost did it on the way and I almost did a fucking investigation. And then you see the guard at the door, this big goon suddenly clutches his heart and goes, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Go ahead and roll initiative as these meat hooks animates That's a seven for me. This is 18 sweet then let's go ahead and cut back to Henry You are sick fuck

I think Brian Murphy is a sick fuck I am a a sick fuck. Henry, put your do-go-pong-sup. Give me a behavior. Go ahead and give me a role. This dude looks a lot tougher. OK. Then Willie, you hear the crowd yelling for him. But Sib had given you the advice that if you last a few rounds with this dude, you have a better chance in the later rounds. OK, so I'm doing a lot of like bobbing and weaving. Great. Go ahead and give me your athletics check with the D4 and the later rounds. Okay, so I'm doing a lot of like bobbing and weaving. Great, go ahead and get me.

As box of show. Your athletics check with the D4 and the plus one. I did. I did bad too. I would not as bad as I did. I'm a D4. I rolled a net one. Roll the one on my D4.

Oh no. With, when I add everything, it's a nine. A nine. Okay, when I add everything, it's a nine. A nine. Okay, this dude got a 12. You might survive and not get knocked out, but you see, you start bobbing and weaving. This dude surprisingly quick in the first round, catches you off guard, opens you up with a jab.

That's the first time you've been hitting the nose in a long time. It kind of dazes you. Your hands go up to protect your head, and this dude just starts socking you in the gut, gets you up in the corner, and just starts raining blows on you. You get punched in the liver,

and you feel your body begin to like shut down, like you're gonna drop. That is a DC-13 constitution saving throw to stay up. All right. Ooh, 13. Yeah. That's a 15. 15.

You weather the storm as this dude pounds on your ribs. And you hear some people are like cheering for you to keep going. They want to see this like, why are you dude beat this big buff dude? You weather the storm, but you have definitely lost the round. You get plop popped down in the stool Sib starts rubbing your shoulders. Yeah, no pep talk. Please please

Because I can I can say whatever you want you got your ass kicked that time But all you all you got to do is knock them out Thank you for the invite early got your ass kicked that time, but it's okay Yeah, no my morale is right back up. Let's go. Let's go. Bell rings. You go out for the second round.

You see this dude is like looking strong, but he's like huffing and puffing a little bit for the second round. It's tired. Go ahead and make your athletics check for the second round. Okay, I take like a big spin around the ring, you know trying to try to tuck her in a little bit Baby 17 no joke. I just rolled a natural goddamn one Just do trips up as he's chasing you around the ring Light on my feet a trips a little bit and you catch him right on the chin with his additional punching

skill. This dude got a nine. What did you get? A 17. A 17. Okay, so he's a do a constitution saving throw to stay standing. That passes natural 19 with his con. He way passes it.

You hit this dude right in the chin. He wobbles, he starts to back up and you get and you start going for his ribs and you hear the crowd going crazy. Bell rings, that's the end of the round. One for you, one for him. Bell rings to go out for the third round. You walk back up.

Go ahead and give me a charisma check, Henry, to try to win the crowd over. Contested charisma check. He only has win the crowd over contested charisma check He only has a plus one he got a 17 though. Okay. Well, I hold my boxing glove to my ear to sort of listen to the crowd noise Shout out to the two Everyone's like Yeah, I can't hear it. It hurts me that I'm not there to help. Yeah, you can get It's the key to this is you can get like inspiration from the crowd

But only after you've like one rounds It like can kind of like build you up and build up your momentum But you're still where you were you see this dude is red faced And is looking more tired than the last one taking these big heaving swings. They hurt when they hit, but he's a lot slower. Go ahead and make your athletics check for the round. Okay. He rolled.

Goddamn good. 15. 15. Okay. He got a 20. Oh, okay. Okay. So you see, yeah, you're bobbing and weaving trying to get out of the way trying to tuck a rim out

But he does a land a really hard shot behind your ear. It wobbles you You go over the to the ropes to kind of try to stay on your feet You see the crowd around you is getting blurry as they're yelling this dude goes and cracks you again across the jaw Go ahead and give me a constitution saving throw. Try to stay up. Have stayed away from the rope. What do I need to hit? I rolled a 15.

A 15 is exactly it, you pass. Wow. See your legs are like jello. You start to go out, but you stay up and you hear the bell ring for the end of the round You see the red has to like save you from getting killed by this dude Pulls a back sound of that bell. I get a good bell. You get pulled up on the stool And you see Sib goes all right if you're holding back at all

It's time to let it all out and kind of do your thing all right great. Yeah. So the advice, the pep talk, the advice is too well. It's just try to do your best, believe in yourself. Do you want to pop up my cigar? Yeah. Give me a cigar. Henry, you go out for the fourth round. This dude has already won two rounds. You have only one won.

But he is looking tired. He is red-faced and goping for air. He gets less of a bonus this time. Go ahead and make your athletics check. Okay, fucking bobbin, weaving. 18. He got an 11. So Henry, you start to get into it.

You're like, you're way skinnier, but you're in like pretty good shape. So you have like cardio for days, you keep going. You keep popping this dude and opening him up and then he peppering him with hard shots. So this dude has to do a DC-17 con-saving throw to stay up. You got a 19.

You see his standing. It is. Final round. Two to two going into the last round. Henry, go ahead and give me a charisma check after having won that Final round. Two to two going into the last round. Henry go ahead and give me a charisma check after having won that last round. Fucking four. A four.

Okay. This card does not like. People are still yelling for Sullivan. You can tell that you've won people over but people already made their bets on Sullivan. And that's all they care about. That fair enough. Bell rings.

You guys go out for the last round, go ahead and give me a one last athletics check. Stu's huffing it puffing. Come on, you vascular bastard. 17. This dude got an eight. Woo! Come on.

He has a DC 19 to stay standing. Henry, you guys are trading blows going back and forth. You are peppering him with like strong, fast shots, but he's hitting you with these like lumbering hooks and he dazes you, pushes you back into the corner a little bit, but you turn it around on him, use some like fancy footwork, get him in the corner, start working his body, he puts his arms down to block like fancy footwork get him in the corner start working his body

He puts his arms down to block his body and you crack him a caros the jaw his head spins and you see he goes out on the ground And you see Sib starts going fucking nuts because they bet money on you and this was a real fucking opponent And Sib starts going fucking crazy Henry go ahead and give me a charisma check with advantage. Okay, yeah, you know what, Sim, just so you know, the advice I listened to was from Fia Puginia.

She told me, don't say that name again, Bunk Bulk in yet. No, I just, she said to stay mad. What are you talking about? That's a nine. A nine. Okay, here's some golf claps. Yeah. Yeah. That is, yeah, here's some golf claps. Yeah.

Yeah. That is, yeah, we're gonna call them Hank. That's music to my ears. That really swells Henry's ears. A couple of guys who make fun of you at the docks, who hear them bloubly discussing that they might make fun of you less. Yeah.

Man, there's fucking weirdos not so bad. Wow, I wish I didn't hear that one. Then we are going to... Sound carries. ...cuts back over to Fia and Zirk. Fia and Zirk. Oh, right. Okay, okay, this is fine.

First to act is the meat hooks. The meat hooks fly at you, swinging on their chains, and are gonna try to crack both of you. The ones that go after Zirk, swinging on their chains and are gonna try to crack both of you. The ones that go after Zirk, are they getting an opportunity attack from me? Are they getting an opportunity attack? No, they're not like sentient. You can deduce from the experience you had before from the wind that this is some kind of spirit that flew through this room and haunted the objects to animate them before killing this rook near the door.

So is the spirit still in here? You have no idea. Okay. First, Mead Hook goes after Fia. That is a 9-to-hit Fia. Mrs. It's me. Next hook flies at Zirk.

That's a 19-to-hit hits. Oh, it's a mean-right hook. A 11-damage to Zirk as it slashes you across the chest. Oh, what? What? Fia, that is your turn. 11 damage to Zirk as it slashes you across the chest. Oh, what? Fiya, that is your turn. You see this room, just these whirling meat hooks. You also see that the spirit,

it has like completely haunted this room that there is like a bench that is flying up. You see haunches of meat flying up. Looks like you're gonna get hit with projectiles. Socks, you are going to need to use a dash action to get to the door on the other side of the room because this is like difficult terrain to weave through all the chains and everything. I will use my dash action to get to the door and while I do I will use a bonus action, Shield of Faith on Mr. Zerk to give him plus two to AC. Sweet.

Oh. You can. Thank you. A bonus action, shield of faith on Zirk. On initiative 10, that is flying debris. A huge haunch of meat goes to hit Zirk. Zirk, go ahead and give me the dexterity saving throw. And Fiya, give me a dexterity saving throw.

Zirk opens his mouth super wide and tries to chomp through the meat. Ooh, I got a raw 18. I don't have good dexterity. Okay, you pass no matter what unless you have a negative 22 for Zirk. A Zirk, you matrix, bend back and take a little bite of the meat as it passes by you. It is raw and you do vomit. But you live to fight another day, Zirk, that is old me! Zirk, that is your turn. Okay, I see Fia run towards the door, and I'm gonna do the same, I take a dash action sweet, and then once I'm there, can I use my alchemy jug to make acid and

pour it in the lock to try to bust the door open. What kind of action is that? What is the alchemy thing? Could you make that stop instantly? Ceramic jug appears to hold a gallon of liquid and weighs 12 pounds, whether full or empty, let's see. You can use an action and name one liquid from the table below to cause the jug to produce the chosen liquid. So this is going to use your action and you're not going to be able to dash.

You can only get halfway across the room with your movement, but I will let you throw it to Fia if you want. Ooh, I shake up the jug and whisper acid and then out loud I say to Fia. Fia acid. Go ahead, Zirk, give me an athletics check with advantage. I'll say that.

It's an easy softball toss, but. Okay, uh, athletics, that's zero. Uh, that's an 11. 11, that makes it. Uh, Fia, you catch it. Yes. Um, you start, uh, working to undo its to open the door and then we are going to cut back to Henry. Henry, you see the ref announces another fighter. Next up we got the rain and champ Hank Hogfish

fighting the next challenger Thorne Kirk Thunder, Marty Umbur. You see a fighter with black quaffed hair glistening step between the ropes, but before he can get into the ring, you see Fergus. I know! Grab the ref and pulls him over and goes, no, I'm fighting next. And you hear the crowd goes fucking crazy and Sim goes, God damn it, Fergus, what the fuck are you doing? I didn't sign up for this. And they start loudly arguing back and forth. You see the ref backs down.

You see the other boxer backs down. Does not even have his hands taped. You see Fergus just takes his shirt off. A mountain of a man thick. Like literally like the mountain from Game of Thrones. And just like does not have his hands wrapped and just a knuckles bruised and skinned from getting into fights.

And you see Sib pulls you in and goes, all right, look, we actually have an opportunity here, okay? And you hear, here's the opportunity that I get fucking murdered by your friends. If you survive though, there's an opportunity here. First off, he's not my friend, I fucking hate Fergus, okay? Just because we work for the same gang does not mean that we're friends, I fucking hate Fergus, okay?

He's a fucking moron. Listen, cool, all right, make sure there's an opportunity here to make a lot of money, okay? He's pissed off of me from last night so he's trying to fuck me over here but we can fucking him over, you understand? Okay, how? If Fergus gets himself disqualified, he will lose the fight and I will win a fuck ton of money.

Do you understand that? Great, how does he get disqualified? Like rip in my fucking head. That's the thing is that you need to not die though, is the thing. Great, thank you. Another amazing pep talk coming from my trainer. All right, you do whatever you want.

I'm saying if you piss him off, you could potentially win this thing. Okay, if you piss them off, you could potentially Win this thing. Okay, the win on a technicality got it You go out you see Fergus stands across from you a solid two-head taller And just kind of laughs and smiles and the bell rings So even with just your passive insight, you can kind of tell that the way this works is like, Fergus can come in and he can push around the ref

and be like, I want to fight, he can say that, but he can't do whatever he wants in the ring, because if he does whatever he wants in the ring, then people are getting fucked out of their money, and people will start riding and things like that. You know what I mean? So if he freaks out and kicks or like body slams you, he loses by default.

You have two options. You can either fight and try to win and roll your D4 and do normal, or you can try to make him mad by dancing around. But if you do that, you're putting yourself at a slight disadvantage and you're gonna roll without your D4. And then he's gonna do a wisdom check at the end of each round to not like get frustrated, but you have to not get knocked out, if that makes sense. Yeah, you know, I'm light, I'm light, I'm springy,

and I'm afraid of furgus. So I'm gonna, but I'm gonna take off my gloves, so he feels like I'm there to play. So we're going bare knuckle, huh? You unwrap your hands, and he goes, yeah, that'll be good. That'll be a less they have to take off when they fucking bury you. They have That was fucking they ring the bell and then we're gonna cut back over to Zerkin Fia at initiative 20 is the meat hooks

Meat hooks are gonna go for Fia. 14 to hit Fia misses. Misses. Good God, sir. You have such bad luck even when I'm fucking rolling. 22, 20 to hit. Zirk has a plus two. Zirk has a plus two, but I got a 22 to hit.

This still hits, yup. Zirk, you were cut for 12. Zirk's down. Zirk goes down. Fia, that is your turn. Via pours acid in this door. You pour acid in the door. You see that it begins to eat away at the lock and get more brittle.

Healing word, Zerke. Nice. I heal you for four. I try to do my best. I pour it in and I try to run out of the door. Sweet, go ahead and give me with advantage in athletics check because the door, the lock to the door is like all fucked up now. Fio, you made the meat taste good. Thank you. Oh baby! 19! And I have proficiency in athletics because that's my shit, so that's going to be a 24!

24? Yeah, 24! Up in the door! Fiat, you bust down the door and plow your way out. You see it as you open the door. You see a bookfarer is flapping there. Bookfarer is going to fly in and... I was going to say book for go help go help Zurich Dr. Zurich needs a nurse book far gives the help action to Zurich

Zurich go ahead and give me a deck saving throw with advantage as some like giant meat hammers fly at you Oh god, just once I would like to heal someone It's okay Dr. Zurich you will that is going to be a 15. That is exactly what you needed. So you see bookfar flies in and starts flapping. You see bookfar is hit but spins. He's not the animated. He's just like hit on the side. Oh spins spins around. The book full ends in Zerk's hands. Zerk, you, Zerk, it is your turn. Let's book it. That's so nice.

To book for. Sweet, Zerk, with the rest of your movements, you are able to get out of the freezer. You go out in this kitchen. You see that there is some chaos going on in this kitchen. Oh, before we go anywhere, I want to slam the door to the freezer shut and cast mending on it to repair the lock. You slam the door shut and you run out in this kitchen and where you guys going? Are you making it for the main hall?

I mean, I, uh, I as a player, run to see Henry, but I as Fia, I'm like, we should go talk to this woman and tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, tell her, Fia, I'm like, we should go talk to this woman and tell her. You would still be you would be able to see Henry from there. They're on the second balcony. Okay, let's go to this woman's table. Let her know another one has lost their hearts. You guys get out into this balcony, but you have a hard time finding Adam Whitlock at first glance because you see that everybody on the second floor balcony is now watching the boxing ring. And you see that Henry has stepped up to Fergus,

the bell rings, Henry go ahead and roll your athletics check. I'm gonna sort of like blow the blood that's dripping on my face into his face a little bit like with a heavy breath. You fucker. So that's dripping on my face into his face a little bit, like with a heavy breath. You fucker. So that's an 18. He got a 24. So you come out, you try to get cute with him.

You start peppering him with jabs and like walking around the outside. You got him chasing ya, but you see that he's in better shape than the other guy. And he just keeps right on ya, keeps his front foot pointed at you and eventually just catches you and that gets you in the corner and just starts lighting you up with shots. Go ahead and give me a con saving throw to stay standing. I don't know if I'm going to do it. That is only a 13. Zirken Fia, you see Henry trapped in a corner at the beginning of the round,

absolutely getting pummeled. Fergus hits him with a hard shot and he is out on his feet. He is definitely going down and you see in the other corner, Sib pulling their hair out and frustration, looking around and then lock size with you guys and search gesturing towards Henry. Okay, I will put a guidance into bookvar and send him down to Mr. Henry because I can put a touch spell into bookvar and send him to a friend. So I will do that and I will do it as sneakily as I possibly can.

Great. So you have nice bookvar fly down, bookvar flies low and gets in under the ropes of the ring, bumps up against Henry's foot, trying to be as unnoticed as possible as hiding under like a towel essentially. Henry, go ahead and do a con saving throw and add a D4 to it. That's time it's a 19. Oh! Henry, you stay standing. Fia, go ahead and give me a deception check. Now, since I am using book for, I probably can't get the help action from him. Get it from Zirk.

Zirk, please, I have a minus one. Well, yeah, I got you. What are we doing with it, please? I'm going to gonna say this is pretty inconspicuous because it's just a book bumping up against his foot. So I'm gonna say DC 12. Well, I got the five, even with advantage. You see, Henry looks like he's about to go out and then suddenly gets this shock of energy. This magic aura that is visible to everybody for a second and you suddenly start here in the crowd go crazy

and you see the rep goes no magic no magic it's, you're disqualified! And you hear the people in the crowd start going fucking ape shit. You see, Fergus grabs Henry by the throat, holds him up over the corner of the boxing ring as the people on the outside are fucking ravenous. You see people start tearing up tickets and fucking freaking out. And that's where we'll end our session. Oh

You fucking maniac you fucking maniac. I can't believe you Wow How how do you get the baby being who you are? I'm sick guys if you want to listen to our after show head on over to patreon.com If you want to listen to our after show, head on over to patreon.com slash nad pod that's n-a-d-d-p-o-d. Don't sing, yes. Wee. Wee.

Sorry. And we will chat about all of this fun stuff. Can't wait. Does anybody have anything they'd like to plug this week? You know what? Make a plan. Think about voting. You can do it at headcount.org slash head gum.

You can preview your ballot. You can find out where your polling place is. They even have resources where you can volunteer can find out where your polling place is, they even have resources where you can volunteer to help out at your polling place. So do that, go vote. Find a way. Please, please, please, please, please vote. Do a vote.

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We have some lovely trinkets that have been sent to us from Fine Folks, and I will shout them out now. Yes, please. Somebody sent us a notepad, tote bag, face mask, and coffee mug with 2020 rolling with disadvantage drawn on them. Do you know I'm using one of those notebooks? Oh, nice.

Right now. Yeah, it's like a frowny face, but with dice for eyes, I believe. It's very cute and also very much moved and aviabed. So is that with you? Please let us know. And then Axel, AKA Bubble underscore codes on Twitter, sent us character coded friendship bracelets

and photo cards of their art, which includes drawings of girls from the Witcher fighting over Emily. Oh my God. Oh my goodness, I have not seen this yet. Ah yes, Tristan Yennefer fighting over emilates. It's very spicy. Thank you so much, Axel.

It's an easy, we all know who's gonna win. And then Jeff S. Lord of the Fjords, and I say treasure trove of goodies, including a cobald press deep magic book, wild-shaped cards, spring leaves dice from Ireland, some inspiration points, and of course, a bunch of DVDs. Jeff, I am using the Wild Shape Cards for another Druid I'm playing, and I have always talked about how I needed that as a Druid, and it comes in so handy.

That's incredible. Thank you, Jeff, for making it easier for Emily to transform into creatures. Mm-hmm. God's word. Yeah, you spoil us, Jeffrey. We also got a Vin Diesel Blu-ray collection. God for Jeff. Which includes Bloodshot, Witch Hunter,

and of course, Fade of the Furious. You spoil us. Emily and I saw Witch Hunter in theaters, of course. Natural movie, movie opens with Vin Diesel pulling pulling out doing runes on a plane. I wish I had done that. I saw a blood shot on like Amazon Prime video for like 40 bucks instead of seeing in theaters. Like I paid like the full price like at home theater experience. It's not worth it. Sorry then. Alex sent us a nice letter and some origami in the shape of Obsidian.

Thank you so much. It's really sweet. Yeah, you can actually move the tail on the origami to make that noise. It's incredible. Amazing. And lastly, Danny sent us frog nor pins. That is frog balmore for those not in the nose.

That's right. They're incredibly cute. I'm in the nose know you need to get in on Danny's frog hop on in on Danny's frogs Thank you again Danny Danny is at Danny doodles eight on Twitter. Thank you so much for them frogs sweets And you can follow us on Twitter at CH. Murphy's me at called these called well at the actor Desemoli and at joker Which is Jake, and you can tweet about the show using hashtag NADPOD. That's NADDPOD. We are VR!

The U.U. The Venetian! We are VR! The U.U. The Venetian! We are VR! The U.U. The Venetian!

Hey there, it is time to thank our benevolent council of elders, starting of course with Brad D. Jeffery S. Halder Frostback, Steelbreaker, and Matt M. Other sentient books in Fias Home, they all take turns preparing dinner for Fia and each of them are equally bad at it, except for Matt who makes a halfway decent lasagna. Good on you. Jordan DJ, Cutter W, Jive G, Zolo Dolo, and Dylan B, detectives working under Inspector Marcy, they all have to pretend their lives suck to make their boss happy, but secretly, they are all best friends and in a bowling league together. Life rules. Shoebbert the mushroom, Danielle the Dastardly, Dame Andrew M Beardman Dan and Scott D. The

Rook janitor is responsible for cleaning up the huge piles of broken glass that Siv leaves on the ground after a night of drinking. Damn, that is a dangerous task. Danny P. Alainas C. Michael Mick D. the head mixologist and Victor T. Balnor's boy. Sprite lamp lighters, no one knows exactly how they lure sprites into the lamps, but the prevailing theory amongst scholars is that they use very tiny cupcakes. Wow, that would work on me too.

Andrew B. Justin I. T.J. M. the gnome barbarian, Alina M. and Trayle the cray-fay. Thorn Kirk's citizens who were assigned Dr. Zonk as their primary care physician, and it seems the greatest horror in Eldomorn is actually privatized healthcare. Uh-oh! Jared E. Christopher B. Austin Bonsoh, MR. Daniel R. and Jordan L. Other guardians of the Grove, they also mourned his passing by standing around a fairy circle

and getting buzzed off tobacco, sadly. There was no pizza though. Dang. Cyborg, version of Josh the Colbold. Gage M. Skokilla. Destin Sea and Richard X Machina. Furcus and Lady Witlocks, other siblings. Strangely enough, they are all dentists.

Illegal crime dentists.ists, illegal crime dentists, sure, but net dentists nonetheless. Michael L. Calvin Noodles, Sergio Salazar, Solomon Sakaraya, Decesoani, Trasta Traveler, and Jori S. The Meat Hook Manufacturers, who are still, who are until today, were able to proudly boast our hooks are 100% not evil. Well, dang, no more. Dana G. Kaelum L. Ryan, Jack L. and Troy, aka the flawless whale. The bartenders at Black Thorn who have started a petition to band patrons who make their drinks glow.

They are artisans and they don't appreciate having their art tinkered with. Thank you very much. Temporal, Sam L. Nicholas C. Reese and S, Samuel B, and Mike H, a group of scrubs who fight in the fighting pit. They saw Henry coming and knew they were out of work for the night. Oj, Matthew E, Colton B, Adam G, Mateo C, and Eric B, the local pizza shop where Bookvar honed his skills.

They actually only hired him to be the menu. He just kept sneaking back into the kitchen and playing with the dough though, fair enough. Panama James, Adrian the Halfling Bard, John H.N. Anime Intellect, and Dan. A much more respectable fighting ring across town called the Fighting pedestal. No ratty pit for these fighters they are admired and revered and they get health insurance. Wow. Nikki W. Grace G. Drew Nasty, C.C. Lulu and J. A group of Smiths who forged the greatest blades in all of Elder Morn, metaphorically of course they are all terrified of flames and don't like being around.

Sharp things. Barnes & Aitor Douglas A. Michelle O. Luke H. Aiden R. H. and Rito Rin. Six best friends who also made a glowing fairy friendship promise, but one of them has actually been getting on everyone's nerves. So they're trying to figure out the logistics and consequences of, you know, breaking a glowing fairy friendship promise. They are the consequences are dire. I'll say that.

Timmy R. Lucas B. Aaron S. Kevin M. and Austin C. Willis crew of Daredevil Friends. They go around filming stupid stunts at Eldermore's very own jackass crew. Wow. Henry was an unknowing participant in a segment called Willis 12th Concussion. That actually tracks. Devon W. Hogfish is above average hog. Wow. Nee ork Steven C. K.J. and Michael Meyer. Meyer. Meyer. Michael Meyer. Of course it's Michael Meyer. Extremely ill informed gamblers

who went all in on Willie. They are hoping things go better with their next champion. Bookfar, Odir. Rahul N. Mike K. Maxwell C. Nick L. But also, but also, Karen T. Owners and proprietors of Bookfar's Booktallion eatery. A literature slash Italian fusion restaurant that combines classic Italian dishes with sheets of paper and ink. That sounds delicious. Echithor 666, Justin Raccoon, Nick W. Michael C. and Robert F. the kitchen workers who have the unfortunate job of cleaning up after the haunted meat hooks and flying haunches as

well as bookfars, catastrophic pizza making attempt. Now that's messy. Esme, M. Spartanus, Nathan, Tasmir, the all-knowing, Big Bad, Beard of the Mad, and Eric, Mick D. Pro-Restlers, who do shows at the Black Thorn on the Boxers and Off-Nights. The crowd has no idea that it's faking, goes ballistic, anytime someone cheats. Which uh, and each event ends with a battle royale between the wrestlers and the crowd as they desperately try to escape the venue. Wow, I do not want to be there on a boxers off night.

Tell you that right now. Burley T. Alex A. Nero Claudius Caesar Augustus Germenicus, Christian A. and J. Dragonborn, a crew of Goths who would totally take up on Zerks offer to hang out and drink in a morgue. Yeah, you know, on a second thought it sounds kinda cool. Jonathan O. the send rayon, Grant, Ben A. Feldonis, and Dave H. Thornkirk beavers who were super pumped that the barge exploded in the river because it gave them a great head start on their new damn.

Damn beaver, that's a cool um damn that you built sorry about that Catherine S David K Christian S Keith K Brittany B and Kyle H book bars test kitchen taste testers unsurprisingly they have all come down with food poisoning after trying book bars pizza bookbar's pizza. Emilio D. Frankie K. Big Bad John. Aston S. Blair the bug Blair Barbarian and Pork Chop. Glass-Willy's previous opponents he lasted less than around with all of them. He also tripped on his way into the ring with Frankie and just sort of knocked himself out before the fight even began. Shanille M. Depressed Demon Hunter. Alice. Minette F. and Pat L, a gang of bats who all witnessed Henry's brazen attack on the fake bats but are planning their revenge on the less as

if the summon bats were their own kin. Lauren H. Matthew J. Janina E. Maddie Y. The eldest berry and Ryan S. A team of fighters Sib coached and delivered their famous pep talks to, all of whom lost miserably. Which, you know, makes sense. The bone-duster, Nathan J, Joshua H, Robert, CRSP, Robert Crisp, and Ydraisal. Animated meat hooks that thankfully don't have any kind of bloodlust, and just use their animation to hold extra meat. Which is very courteous. You'll love to see it. Matthew K, Brentley C. Dymar B. Micah B. Carly Ann. Clarke of the Thunder Fox.

Cigar Rollers whose entire business is supported by one woman named Fia Bignia if she ever tried to quit smoking. Yeah, they would all, they'd all starve. And so are their families. Jorge C. Pupi Pupi Pupi. Thank you for making me say that. Connor Savage, Brian S. Russell H. and Christopher J. O. Gamblers, who just lost a bunch of money betting on Henry and who all planned to unceremoniously murder him. Fun. Good stuff. Thank you everybody. That was a HITGUM podcast.