Not Another D&D Podcast - Eldermourne - Ep. 4: Ghosts of Thornkirk

Episode Date: November 6, 2020

The New Crew investigates Penrose Crypt and deals with an extraordinarily annoying ghost. Henry channels Wolverine, Zirk starts collecting bones, and Fia meets an undead rival. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content!Music / Sound Effects Include:"Broken Heart Banshee" by Emily Axford."Ruins of Cragwater" by Emily Axford."A Memory" by Emily Axford."Young Love" by Emily Axford."Gunvar" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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PAPA at checkout. That's www.atamineave.com. This is an exclusive offer specific to the podcast, so be sure to use the code PAPA to get your discount 100% free shipping and get it fast with brush processing. Code P-A-W-P-A-W. Goodbye, Sweeties. Welcome to the campaign after the campaign after the campaign. This is not another D&D podcast. Welcome back to Elder Morn, everybody! Oh, dear Morn!

I'm your Dungeon Master Brian Murphy joined by Jake Herwits. Hong Kong Fish. Oh no. Emily Axford. Funk Bunk Again, yeah. Nope. And of course, called Waltanner. Zonk for Vayne! Yeah! Okay, he's a cowboy now. Zonk, bonk, and honk. My actual nightmare. Bring the bonk. Just a trio of clowns, gunky blinders. I don't like it. I don't like it one bit.

Anyway, let's get away from this fucking circus, and I'll do a little recap. Zonk in the hunk. Hey, Ditz, let's go and do a little recap. Last time, Henry narrowly escaped death at the hands of Fergus Whitlock by once again magically switching places with his shadow. During the ensuing bar brawl, Zerke and Fia noticed that the fight was being egg-don by the invisible spirit that they had encountered in the meat locker. The brawl eventually ended

when Fiya magically compelled the fighters to chill. It is a word that I invented on the spot. That's true. It's very uncommon in eldermore to say chill. Eldermore on a whole has no chill. That's true. And after she compelled everybody to chill, you were able to escape outside. You got to a safe distance and got to work researching how to rid the town of the ventral spirits.

Based on the circumstances, you deduced that the spirit was most likely a horror called a broken heart banshee, a ghost that rises 10 years after its death and seeks the hearts of its killers or those similar to its killers. Henry revealed that he was staying with someone who might know the victim, the Baron Soshen Fenrose. You all went to Fenrose keep to probe him for information and hopefully swim in his pool with Port wine and

shrimp scampy flowing. The Baron gave you a pretty good lead on who the broken heartbanchie could be. His deceased fiancee a young woman named Sadie Bellwater. The Baron's parents refused to acknowledge their engagement because she was from a poor family. So the two made plans to run off together but the Baron was caught by his father before he could get to her at the crossroads. That night, ten years ago, she was murdered by bandits. After his parents' death, a few years later, the Baron moved Sadie's remains to his family crypt in the catacombs beneath Thorncork, this enraged his father who rose as a ghost

to protect the crypt. With two rogue spirits to contend with, you headed to the catacombs at dawn and began exploring its dark passages. There you are attacked by skeletons but managed to lock them behind you with an iron gate, sealing yourself in the catacombs, but moving one step closer to the Fenrose family crypt and the vengeful ghosts. And that's where we are now. I tell you what, just another day for bonk and the boys. You see skeletons, as you say that, a skeleton just reaches through the iron gate.

I put my face just out of reach, so they keep reaching and tucker themselves out. Oh, actually, can I try and grab one of the fingers off the skeletons? You're collecting fingers now. Yeah, go ahead and give me a dexterity check. Gladly. Well, not gladly, that was a three, but my dexterity is the 3-0-6. Okay, you get scratched by the shard of its very pointy bones. It calls you. You take two damage. Okay. All right.

You're not gonna turn into a skeleton or nothing now, right? I can feel it forming inside me. If you really want, I will try to collect a finger with my may chance. Why? A book of our pipes up. Why? Is there a reason we're collecting?

I don't know. Dr. Zurk thinks it's important So if he wants a finger I will get him a finger. Give me the finger. Everyone give me the finger I Made Chan the middle finger away Of a skeleton and then flip him off. Why did you do that? I don't understand Fia go ahead and make a spell attack for your mage hand against the skeleton 15 a 15 hits Stan. Fia, go ahead and make a spell attack for your Mage Hand against the skeleton. 15.

A 15 hits, you successfully pluck off. What is it? Is it a metatarsal? Is that at the end? I think metatarsal is feat, because I got surgery on my metatarsal. Let's just say philange. You grab a philange. Great, yeah.

Fia, you grab a philange as an arrow, flies through the gate, it's gonna make an attack on you with disadvantage. We're being punished. That is only a seven to hit, gets through the iron gates, but pinks off, you hear the skeletons, more skeletons heading down. Okay, Mr. Zerke, you can have this, but I'm going to start to run.

Oh, fair enough, yep. Sweet. Thank you for flandering. Let's all go. So you guys take off through the catacombs. It is pitch black, except for your lanterns. Eventually, the skeleton stop being as loud and as present. You stop hearing the arrows flying

and you just hear the distant banging of metal as they try unsuccessfully to get through. You see as you travel through here lit only by your lanterns, you eventually get to a diverging path. There's a dead end ahead of you, a stone wall covered in dirt and dust, to the left and to the right. You see more crypts in both directions and you were told by the barren that his was to the right. So presumably you all had right unless you want to go to the other way for no reason. I would like to look very quickly look because the barren said something cryptic about how his house only has one rose but others have three.

It used to have three. I just want to quickly scan with my big unblinking eyes for something with three roses. Okay, and she scans, I give some eye drops to fear. Thank you. I wish I could do this on my own, but. Just all of you so close to each other, just clanging, burning hot lanterns as you as you

wield like a crossbow in one hand a lantern in the other hand and you use your wrists to try to squeeze eyedrops into fias eyes as she reads gold placards on the sides of grips. You see there is the the axe-thrower family. You see more fletcher's. You see, it seems like this was a very big family. Maybe they had a family feud at some points. We must find a fletcher because they are very influential in this town. The very pointy arrow family.

Of course it's down here at the Rusty Maces. Okay, great. This is a nothing check. I will continue. Well you do see, yeah as you go to the right, this does seem to be a wing that does have Fennros family members in it. With rows of Fennros? Yes, there's rows of Fennros. You see as you walk down the right corridor, several wooden doors with iron rings, there are dusty gold placards for different branches of the Fenderos family here.

And most of them do have crests with three roses on them. And you see that as they list the family members that are there, that are in each one, it seems like the family name at one point for like the oldest son used to be Sebastian and it became Sebastian with the Baron Sebastian. First of his name. But you do you do eventually see a crypt with a single rose. Okay. Do we think is there a placard? Do we think that this is Sadie or is this so questions?

You see questions daddy you see a long list of people from So questions immediate family and listed here you see Sadie's name written as Sadie Bellwater the future lady Sadie Fenrose, that's lady Sadie. That's really nice Well, I guess we are to go in here then. Yeah, let's go poke around. I'm going to, as a ritual, cast Detect Magic to see if there's magic enchanting this door. You hold your hand up, magical runes appear on the door,

and you see that this door is not magical, but there is a strong magical presence coming from the other side. Ghostly? It would seem so. OK, there's a ghost on the other side of the door. Obviously, we knew this. How do you want to proceed, my friends?

You know, this was expected, I suppose. Yes. So it was. It was definitely a situation where I was expecting a ghost. We've got a little bit of a skeleton. If we could find a lot more of a skeleton, we could pretend to be skeletons. Let's not go back to the skeletons

because they were shooting arrows at us. But I like where your head's at. Then I will picture the trickster. And I will think of when she gave me a little bit of inspiration. And I will think of when she gave me a little bit of inspiration and I will cast Divine Favor, which will give me a D4 radiant damage on my attacks. Sweet. While we're preparing for anything out here, I might as well whip something together. This is something I've been working on, something that Nebel was teaching me how to do. I haven't

quite got the hang of it, but here goes nothing. And I kind of whipped together a bunch of stuff, and I poured all into a little vial, and I violently shake it together, and I now have an experiment to let it lickser, which I can roll a D6 to determine the effect of. Is this more blade oil? I put it on my blade. I mean, I'm glad you didn't try to eat it this time, but just one second. It is six. Ooh, it is the altar self-spell. So it can either give somebody gills or it can give somebody extra D6 for an unarmed attack, or you can use it to disguise yourself. Interesting. I know someone who likes to use an unarmed attack. Oh good, I thought you were gonna offer me to have gills

and I'm not interested. Ha! No, I saw you on the pool. You are already so comfortable and water. You have to give me swimming lessons. I keep sinking to the bottom. Yes, I have a large lung capacity. Henry, if you wanna drink this, I guess fear was right.

You can drink this one. Bottoms up, guys. Alright. You see, Henry throws back this elixir. I pat my neck to see if I got gills. And you do have small gills. What the fuck? Huh, they're small. You know what, let's get some pancake putty on those. It'll be fine. You grow very tasteful gills, but then you're doing the unarmed attack one. Natural weapons. You grow claws, fangs, spines, horns, or a different natural weapon of your choice. Your unarmed strikes deal 1D6 bludgeoning, piercing, slashing damage as appropriate to the natural weapon you choose, and you are proficient with your unarmed strikes.

Finally, the natural weapon is magic, and you are proficient with your unarmed strikes. Finally, the natural weapon is magic, and you have plus one bonus to the attack, and damage rolls you make using it. Whoa, them being magic is really great for ghosts. That's much gonna be much better than a regular old Halberd. Amazing. Henry Wolverine style, it's very painful.

You see bones, the bone claws grow out of your hands. You just hear cracking as the bones in your hands. I'll take the gills. Redirect to make room for them. I'll take the gills. Henry, I gotta be honest, I use some of that bone finger. I think this is why that's happening. I'm sorry.

Henry now has Wolverine bone finger. I think this is why that's happening. I'm sorry. So Henry now has Wolverine bone claws. They are magical. And by the way, so everybody at home knows, everybody is level three now. They leveled up after last week's shenanigans. Henry, why don't since you're all great weapon fighter and everything, why don't we treat your claws almost like a great sword? So why don't we just have you, we'll flavor it. So you do your tax kind of normal and we'll do 2d6 instead of the 1d12. And then because it's magical,

we'll give you plus one, plus one to it. Nice. Okay, who wish to lead the way? I can always lead the way. I'm not afraid, but I don't want to take it from someone else. Actually, Henry, you look the most fucked up right now I would be scared to encounter you. So maybe you go first. Okay. Yeah, I could knock on this door here with my new claws

Yeah, let's go ahead and knock on the door. That seems Just like a totally bonkers idea that might work out. Okay, Henry Raps with his bone claws against the door Scratch the door like a cat. You claw the door. In this, these catacombs full of monsters, you think the most non-threatening thing to do is to claw at a door with magical claws.

Let us in. You do here, after you knock, you hear a voice go. Run away! This crypt has been Decrated is this a toilet that we just knock on the bathroom If you think this is a bathroom go away This cannot be Did any help do you need a more rule. I hate this ghost. It's not a bad rule. We are here for SOSTION.

SOSTION is a LIE. We're here for SOSTION's daddy. I am SOSTION's daddy. I am the Baron Sebastian Federal. We're here to talk to you. Yes! We're here to talk to you. Yes! We're here to talk to you. I am Swayan's daddy. I am the Baron Sebastian.

When you're done with your bowel movement, I've had a bad room. You sound like you're taking a bath. It's actually a huge room in here. Oh, so you're constipated as what you're saying? You can't go to the bathroom. Oh, so you're constipated is what you're saying? No! No! Fia looks at this situation and Nuvander's if she wants a part of it. Smokes a cigar and walks a little bit away. Oh, maybe give him a cigar. That would help him poop.

Don't! There's a no smoking! There's no smoking in here! Do not desecrate the tomb! What if we told you we could undeccrate it? Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe It makes such a deep breath. It feels the cigar. It's like half ash. If we go get your bones, will you let us in? I don't know where my bones are. You can't come in unless you're a full-blooded member of the Fennros family.

But are Sadie's bones in there with you? Yes! Okay, why don't we come in and take a look at them? Yeah, maybe we'll remove them if it seems necessary. Go ahead and give me a persuasion check with advantage. Oh yeah, I don't have anything to knock her as well. So that's a 16. Or a 16, okay, you hear on the other side of the door.

Yeah, I suppose that would be a good start. Is he getting rid of her bones? Why, I said we were gonna look at them, but yeah, maybe, okay, just let us in. And we'll take a look. Definitely. There's flush before we come in, all right? It's not a bad girl.

Hit us with the courtesy flush. It just sounds like you're taking a painful one. I whispered to both of them. He probably died on the toilet. Elvis died. Yeah, I'm really getting that vibe. That's where his bones are. For sure.

He's the door. Creeks open a little bit. Okay, we're coming in. Are you decent? You do not hear our response. Oh boy. Alright, I go in. Yep. Hello, we are here to take out sadies' bones.

You enter the room. I cover my eyes in case there is something in decent happening. Fia has her eyes covered, but the rest of you see that you are in a large domed room. This is like its own tomb that has crypts within it. You see that there are statues in here of various nobles, dusty but well preserved. There are various dusty tabards and flags with the sigil of the Fenrose family. In the center of the room is a faux garden around the statue of a man. There's no actual greenery in here obviously because it's underground, but there's a small rock garden with like painted rocks and green gems.

You also see dried out roses poking out from it. You see that there are three smaller crypts. And like in the tunnels, these are closed off with iron gates with levers next to them. And all of the gates are closed. Are they labeled? You go over to the first one, Zerk, and you see the resting place of Sahuashton I and Sadie Bellwater, the future lady Sadie Fenrose. This looks to be a placard for Sahuashtian's future resting place and where Sadie is. You see the second one says the resting place of Sebastian Fenrose the sixth and the lady

Perneese Fenrose and you see on the one, House Fenrose Honor Guard, the roses store. The, can I do a history check on what the roses store means? No. Without even a history check, you would assume it's just like they're the honor guard. They like protect, he probably had a few of the like honored members of his house, like the like warriors. Yeah, it's coming for a nobility to be buried

with the people who. Can I take a look at the gems in the rock garden? Sure, go ahead and make a perception check. I got an 11. You lean down and look at the gems here and you see that there are some emeralds, but it also looks like there are enchanted, like, cheap crystals. Cupid.

Yeah, it's the equivalent of like, it's like emerald cubic zirconia. Like, somebody had a few real emeralds. They brought a badasla in here. And brought a badasla in here, yeah. Cupid. But as you lean forward and are looking at all the crystals, Zirk, go ahead and give me a charisma saving throw. Oh, boy.

That's going to be a 19, a 19. Okay. You feel the spirit of the last Baron try to possess you and you resist it. And you see for a brief moment, the image of this older man, but he's translucent. He's not that old. He's actually like maybe in his late 50s or early 60s,

has very defined cheekbones and a pointy chin and long hair. You see him for a second. He looks kind of spooked and goes, oh, well that didn't work. I was just admiring your very real gemstone, sir. Thank you. So anyway, you're here now. You're grave robbers.

You've come to steal my emerald cerconia! You can keep this. Well, you said you were here for the bone! We are here for some bones. We haven't clarified which bones were here for you. You did! You said the exact bones you were here for! Yes, we did. In fact, you know what? I'm just gonna go ahead and go down to try to find Sadie's ball.

Okay. Fia, you go over to the crypt that is labeled for unwashed and Sadie and you see that the gate is closed and there is a lever next to it. Yes, I'm going to ask everyone, I'm going to pull this lever, is this okay? Am I allowed to do this? It seems fine. Let me give it to once over real quick. Can I just look at the lever?

See if I can do it. I stand out of the way. So Henry can look at the lever. So he's going to give you a perception check on the lever? Yeah, I've seen a lot of these things before. The second thing is you give it a good yank, and that's an 18. Henry, you inspect the lever and inspect like

the floor around it. You look at the ceiling above you to see if it could be rigged to do anything. And it does not look like this is rigged as any kind of trap. Okay, yeah, it doesn't seem like this is gonna flush the room out at all. So let's...

All right, then for fun, I won't even use my mage hand. I'll fill this lever on my own skin. Sweet. Oh, oh, Fiya, you pull the lever and you hear a mechanical sound from within the walls and you see this gate goes up. Okay, I walked, I sprint down the hole. Wait, no. One step at a time. Is Fiya going by herself or other people going? No, I'll go to. It depends if they follow me or not. She's at a dead sprint, right?

Yeah. Oh, she's got the sense, sir. We are going to go get those bones as promised. Oh, hey! I pray that this alley is not echoey, so I do not have to hear that. Oh, where are my bones? My bones.

I think he shit out his bones. Tricks that are still my rage. The three of you run into this dark room, this crypt with unlit candles sitting in cubbies along the wall, dripping wax that has solidified down the side of it. And you see four coffins in here. And along the walls, there are statues of warriors holding different weapons, a few with axes,

a few with crossbows. And suddenly, you hear the iron gate closes behind you. I didn't do that. You hear the voice of Sebastian Feneros the Six Go. Oh, I switched the blackers. Feel the wrath of the roses thorn. We were outsmarted by that guy. That doesn't feel good.

My throat is still a light with extra power, so I knew I was gonna fight. So who outsmarted, who fucker? I flip him off with the skeleton finger. No, do not play stop-bricking bones in my crypt. Is this your bones? No! Okay. I got your bones right here. Oh, I'd spec them after you die! Is this your bones? No! Okay. I got your bones right here. Oh, I'd spec them after you die.

Um, you guys see the statues with the crossbows, suddenly animates and begin firing off rounds. Um, and you hear rustling from inside one of the caskets. Everybody go ahead and roll initiative. 18. Shout out to the three Cree. I got a 17. Okay sweet.

Ooh, at initiative 20. Feel the roses thorn! My bones! Oh my goodness. I think that the crossbow bolts fire. I need to spend a moment. When we get out of here, we tell Sebastian that we just dispatched that guy real quick and we're not tricking even once.

I don't even want to save his bones. I'm not going to save his bones. I'm not going to do it. I'm just not going to save his bones. I'm going to fight his bones. I'm going to grind them up and I'm going to sell them. We have to do no avenging for that guy. The opposite.

We've revengeed you. We've got to fight a toilet and toss his bones right that guy. Yeah, the opposite. We've revengeed. We got to fight a toilet and toss his bones right in there. First crossbow bolt misses, Zirk. Next one goes after Henry. That is a 15 to hit Henry. That does not. Does not hit misses. Last one goes after Fiya.

Krits on Fiya. I think I have to take it, right? Six damage. Six damage. As Fiya is hit with crossbow bolts. Zerke? Feel my divine favor stay. It does stay.

Zerke, that is your turn. And you see the image of this ghost. This ghost is holding down the lever on the other side. I'm going to run over to one of the crossbows and try to use a tinkering to aim in it the other crossbows. OK, so we'll say that there are two crossbowmen statues on the one side and one on the other side.

So I'll say that you go over to one of the two on the two side and try to basically, I'll say use proficiency plus I guess like strength to try to like muscle this thing as you're using like your tinkerers tools to try to like muscle this thing as you're using like your tinkerers tools to try to like edge it ever so slightly so it's shooting at the other crossbowman. Am I strength is zero, but fuck, that's just a seven.

A seven. You get the feeling as you're trying to like mess with this stuff, you know, you're competing against stone here. So it's like animated stone. You're trying to like muscle it a little bit and it doesn't seem to have any give Fia that is your turn can I go to this ghost that's holding the lever down? Yeah, and shove my sword through

The gate to impale these ghosts. It's gonna be an attack roll with disadvantage But it's a ghost so it does not have super high have super high a Okay, this is ill advised, but I think that there's nothing for us in this tool. So I'm going to do this. Wait, what? I don't sprint because I'm not excited about this. I stomp. And I shove my sword through. My bow. You're all in the great. Rolling with this advantage.

My sword through my boat in the great rolling with this advantage Give him one sharp bone. Okay a six plus six is 12 That hits with your magical thing is your attack magical now. Oh, I don't know. Let me see. Oh actually I think it's magical because of no matter what I think it's magical because of the scampy oil. Oh the scampy oil damn Scampy how dare you I mean it's garlic that is That is my family's meal 16 damage three of which is radiance Three of which is radiance. You just walk up and just no nonsense just stab through the grains. You see a burst of holy energy as it goes through

Sebastian's chest. You see his form warps around it and gets a bit weaker and he goes, oh no! So he is impaled on my sword. I pull it close so that I can whisper in his ear or through the grate and say, I'm going to find your bones and flush them down the toilet that's the problem. And I'm going to bonus action attack again. Oh my God. Give me another attack with disadvantage. This is stabbing this ghost through the grate.

The only bones you're getting are a bonus action, my man. That's 11, but I haven't- That's right. That hit, that hit, that hit. That exactly is. Oh, yeah. The FBI is just jamming with magical energy just furiously stabbing this ghost through the grave. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, Who walked into a trap now? That's another 13 damage three of which is radiance. This is our tomb now you idiot. Shrieks. No

Take Sadie's bone You're going to open his door or am I going to keep turning you into a little piece of me down my skewer? Go ahead and give me an intimidation check feel with advantage. Okay. I Will say in situations like I will say in situations like, I will say in situations like this where you've just shown a feat of strength, do your strength bonus instead of your charisma. Oh.

Great, because I have a minus one, so I rolled a 14, but I have a minus one. However, my strength bonus will be plus three, so 17. You hear the ghost on the other side of the gate go Okay, I give up I And on actually next to act on initiative 15 is the ghost you see It's gonna use an object interaction to press the gate up. You see the gate once again raises and then uses full movements to dash out of there.

You're the only guy I ever saw yield from the other side of a metal gate. This is a good lesson by the way gang. Turns out you can just beat up the ghost. I lost a fucking mad at him. I had to just go after him. Oh no that fucking ripped that rule you hear the banging inside the one casket stops and You see the statues lower their crossbows. I'm very curious who was in that casket But maybe we could ask the ghost.

You could just go open it. I'm standing here at the door. I'm standing so that if someone tries, I'm guarding the lever so you can go investigate. You want to flip that casket? I'll take a crack the casket. Just a crack. Just a little, the tiny little piece. I'll back you up. Okay. You crack the caskets, and you see this looks to be some kind of skeletal warrior buried in full armor and wielding a battle axe, but currently de-animated. Does that armor look pretty good? It is chainmail.

I'll swipe it maybe with armor, like, woth. Wait, you start. Just swipe it maybe with a wall sweet You start just pick it up with a really long figure. I love to accidentally you know Tad or the chain mail with your bony cloth. It is very sharp I'll say you take some time. I really hope that those go away and you take that you take the chain mail off of this corpse And you hear echoing through the crypt. Crypt, brothers! That's us. And next we're coming for your extremely real emeralds.

They are real! Okay, so I guess it's a different crypt then. All right. Would someone like to go open the other crypt so I can stand here and make sure, you know, guard deliver? Can I take like a real hard look at the labels now that I know that they're fake? Yeah.

They're swapped. Zerk, you exit this crypt. And you see that the other two, one of them is labeled the resting place of Sebastian Fenrose the sixth and Lady Perneese Fenrose. So presumably where Sebastian's bones were buried. And then you see the other one is labeled Fenrose Honor Guard. Okay, so unless he did like a full switcheroo, they're probably in the Honor Guard one.

Should we check that one next? Yeah, I don't feel like he's that smart to do the triple switcheroo. That's true. This is the guy that lost his own bones. He wouldn't be able to do triple switch. You hear the ghost muttering to himself in the background? A triple switcheroo who would fall on? The only thing you triple switcheroo to your own damn bones, sir. Great, brothers. Cool. Do you mind if I open the gate this time? Yeah, I'm standing here to like making sure everyone gets out. Zirk goes up to it and doesn't realize how strong Fiya and Henry are. Until he tries to turn the gate. Oh my gosh.

It just realizes that it's very heavy. Zirk, as you pull down on the lever for that one, go ahead and give me a deck saving throw. You guys from the outside, see the ground, give out below him. Oh God. Hang on to the lever. Do not let go of the lever.

Oh, he was made Jan on the lever. He was made Jan on the lever. He was made Jan on the lever. I hate when he is happy. That's going to be a 16. 16 passes. Zerke, you're able to jump out of the way at the last second, but you do scubi-doo into Hank's arms.

Yeah. I should have expected that lever. Sorry about that. OK, so don't trust levers. That's the lesson here, not unless I looked at it. Zerke has just avoided the ground collapsing below him But you do see that

The gate net the gate does not go all the way down So there's a way you could basically like climb up out of the rubble. This was not like a finely made trap This was just like the ground collapsed and so you can get in through there Fia Go ahead and give me a perception check while you are by yourself. That's going to be a 10. Okay. Fiya, go ahead and give me a charisma saving throw.

Okay. Now, because I am so still and calm, I actually do this with advantage. Okay, I have a minus one, but I roll day 17 so 16. Fiya, you feel the ghost try to possess you and you reject it. And for a brief second, you see Sebastian outside of you. I fucking shake him like snow after you walk in from a snow storm. How can you grab me, I'm a ghost!

That's right, I get my fucking hand and I just like toss him against the wall. She didn't even use her mage hand. Okay, I yield again. You really shouldn't be allowed to yield more than once. I yield, try it, it's three strikes, three strikes. I just really hate you so much. Hey, just go sit down. Why can't you sit on the golf, sit on the wedding bone?

And you're not going to have any bonds. You are going to kill a chair so you can sit in it. I don't understand what you need from me. I've never thought of it that way. You know, it's like a chair, a toilet. Go take the painful shit you always sound like you're taking. Okay! Uh, if you see this ghost disappears again.

Fucking hate this guy. If it possesses me, I'm gonna be very pissed. I get worse at questions coming from with this guy. Yes, I'm out this dude. So how's the question one turned out surprisingly good for how fast that is. Imagine that guy lecturing you. The hard part is like, should I just keep going at this ghost

with my sword? No, I should soldier on. All right, shall we go through this second tomb? Yeah. Sweet. All right, so with the ground having given out here, the gate did not open, but now there is a path in because you can climb in from under. So you go through the rubble and you are all able to climb up into this crypt.

And you see that this room also has little puppies in the walls for candles, but the room stretches a bit further than the others, and appears to have a small corridor from which you see glowing light. Looks promising. I mean, okay. Yeah, I guess there's nothing to do, but to walk to it.

Sweet. Don't run, do not run. I don't run. I stump, I don't run. I don't sprint, I stump. Fia stomps forward. Book far flapping next to her. The two of them are so loud. Each, it just, it sounds like somebody slamming a book every time book far moves. This is why I have just invented a Judd style.

Because I might as stop. We're being very careful and slow. We're not running slow deliberate plotting. You are talking your strategy out loud. Yes, at a volume that is surprising. That is how you stealth. You whisper to each other. We are being quiet. Very, very quiet. the crypt and you see a treasure trove of glowing rocks that light up the room with a spectrum of color. They are at the foot of a small altar, a top which is a coffin, the arcane infused gems and rocks reflect off the ceiling and create a rainbow. Can I, as a ritual, do identify? Sure. You touch one of these stones and you cast identify and you see that this is a very simple enchantment that all it does is create color. This is like a toy, like a child's toy.

So with your passive insight, you would know that this is kind of an immature idea of what a romantic gift would be. Between the kind of Romeo and Juliet aspect of this relationship and the Baron's own arrested development, this whole situation stinks of young love, like somebody in their first relationship. Does it smell of young love for the better? And there is a part of me that thinks that all of

these surrounding the better and everyone is lying to him, which is why I collected the kisses of all his other people around him, because I'm like, was she really in love with him, or was she in love with someone next to him and just pretending it was him? Hmm. Well, it seems like he loved her. That much is apparent. Hmm. Anyway, we gotta get these bones. Yeah, let's get the bones. Sweet.

Um, see you open the casket. Um, and you see inside is a skeleton. Hands wrapped around a ruby necklace. Here is how you know these types of rituals work. The components for this, the kiss of a lover and the rosewater, are the banshee's weakness. By using it on her remains, you'll summon her in a weakened state. So for the broken heart banshee, that means she'll become visible and will have normal humanoid resistances

instead of ghostly immunities. She'll still have some power and then sort of ghost busters are Pokemon style. You can weaken it and then like banish it or free it. You know what I mean? Once you've entered this horror, you'll be able to send it into the afterlife. Okay.

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I mean, I just have rose water because I think it smells good. Yeah, you're not wrong. Henry, do you want to knock your claws on these bones to wake her up? Uh, yeah, maybe just a light tap. You see, Pukfar goes, what? Why? I know, work last time. As you reach in to the Cascade Henry,

go ahead and give me a charisma saving throw. Yeah, I didn't know if this one am I reaching into a Cascade. Okay. That is A6 Henry. You feel yourself possessed by the ghost of Sebastian Fenrose and lose control of your body. The rest of you guys see Henry suddenly punches through the casket and starts breaking up the bones. Um, and you see there's a sudden shriek that echoes throughout the crypt as blue and black light explodes.

From the like screwed up remains of the skeleton, you see an amorphous blob of necrotic energy spills from the remains and starts taking the form of a terrifying banshee. With strings of hair then move on their own like snakes and blood-red eyes, Henry you are fully possessed and you hear the band she go, murderers, murderers, all of you. You have conspired with my killers. She stretches out claw-like fingers towards all of you, that warp and dart at your chest to try to take your hearts. Everybody roll initiative. Oh boy.

Oh boy. That's a Nath Wands. Oh, that's a seven. 11. Did we like do the ritual? No. Hmm. So you can you via you know that you can like this is gonna be like the hard way essentially which is like you're gonna need to do like a component bomb. You're gonna need to do like a component bomb you're gonna need to like take some rose water dip your hand in it and like spray her with it and then also weaken her okay so I need I have the hand with the kiss in it we need to put some rose water on this and and weaken her and give

her this kiss but since she has been risen in like a disrespectful way because it's a bastion You do see as soon as she appears You see she had these like blood red eyes and everything she quickly Disappears and is completely invisible and you see things around the room. You see all the light of the glowing rocks Goes out. It is just bitch black in here. You fully cannot see her. Henry, I'm sorry about that knocking was a bad idea. I am possessed by Sebastian not you Don't you did nothing that is right? We will use our claws and stop you I hate myself usually an extra right now. I don't like you so much right now, honestly

Punch me in the gills, please. So that is the top of the round at initiative 20. I will say that this being is invisible, but it is a massive sort of amorphous ghost that is creating like a wind effect. So you guys will be able to target it. It will just be with disadvantage until you're able to make it appear with the ritual.

So at initiative 20, it's gonna use its layer action to attempt to tether itself to your hearts. It makes an attack roll on each of you. So first one is against Fia. Seventeen to hit Fia. This heats up. Fia, you feel your heart skip a beat as this thing clutches onto your heart.

Do I know if it's a panic attack? It feels a vaguely like a panic attack. You hear bookfart goes, it got me too. I know it got me. It got me. It will go after zirk to I Rolled the natural 19 is it 25 to head zirk

Will connect to zirk as well last one is to Henry good god. I hit everyone. That's a 21 in Henry So I am possessed and also have my heart grips by the ghost So you have to like consciously and subconsciously manipulate. I will say the two ghosts fucking hate each other. So as this thing rips at you, I will say it will hurt the ghost as well. That's good. We can spin this. Okay. So this thing has managed to tether itself to all three of your hearts. At initiative 13, it does, it's attacks on each of you. You each feel a rush of necrotic energy, and you guys get the sense that the rooks, when they were getting like their hearts torn out,

they are this horrors like favored enemy. So it's not the exact same thing that is happening to you guys, but she is attacking you guys in a similar manner, but you're not just gonna get your heart instantly heated out of your body. That's good. But let's start with Zirk here. but she is attacking you guys in a similar manner, but you're not just gonna get your heart instantly heated out of your body. That's good. But let's start with Zirk here.

Okay. You feel this ghost pull at your heart, infecting you with its anguish. You have a flashback to the last time something pulled at your heart strings. You are asleep in the back of a carriage. When suddenly you are awoken by your mother, she wears a dusty, but brightly colored patchwork cloak with a matching top hat. She puffs furiously on a pipe as

you hear furious shouting from outside the carriage and she goes, uh, up, Zirk, we were getting out of town early. Start the horses. We're getting out of town early. We haven't finished here yet though. There's still stuff going on. Oh, we got to get in the front of the fucking car. Get in front of the fucking carriage. All right, start the horses. All right, let's go.

Okay, maybe we can come back next season. Ah, non-likely, unlikely. Okay. You see she pushes you out of the carriage as she goes and sits in the back. You get up to the front of the carriage where the horses are. But as you leave the safety of the carriage as she goes and sits in the back. You get up to the front of the carriage where the horses are But as you leave the safety of the carriage, you see that there is a mob with pitch forks and torches marching towards you and you hear people shouting out there they are

Burn down the carriage your stupid potion made me sick And you and you see your mother pokes out, she goes, you may experience some side effects from the all-cure elixir. That's just your body ridding itself of toxins. And you see a rock is thrown and cracks into the side of the carriage, and she goes, alright, Turkey, yeah, get the fucking thing going! Oh, okay. I try and like giddy up the the horse or the donk here whatever we're driving on.

You hit the reins and the horses start taking up a little faster and Zerke, as you see your mom she pulls out a pipe and just starts smoking it and closes the carriage behind her, you're by yourself in front of this carriage, you see one girl running as fast as she can trying to catch up to the carriage going, you said it would work! My father had a fever and you said it would cure him, but it didn't! He's gonna die! I'm-I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Keep going!

I'm sorry! Keep going, sir!, don't fucking get I'll find you I'll find you. I'll come back Zurich you quickly outpaste her as the rocks bottles and torches begin to fly and Back in the real world This thing clutches at your heart and your constitution score goes down by three Boof What I thought that sounded like a D4. Yeah. I was thinking oh she's only heating us for four. So your modifier goes from a two to a one. So you lose

three HP and your total goes down by that amount. Wow. Henry, you feel this ghost inside of you. The ghost is also gonna have to do like a saving throw to not get ripped out of you essentially. But Henry, you feel your heart break and you see you are outside the gates of a beautiful manner that sits right on a lake. There's a wonderful garden out front with flowers and statues and birds playing in a bird bath far off at the door of the manneror, you see a woman with blonde hair and beautiful silks standing next to a man with a strong jaw and long brown hair and he's folding his arms, but there's a carriage behind you waiting for you because you're leaving today.

You see right in front of you, on the other side of the fence, is a young boy with dirty blonde hair. He wears an impeccable doublet and looks more like a mini version of a noble than a child. And he goes, hey, I mean, Uncle Henry, how come you're leaving? Why can't you come and live with us? You know, little Henry, I wish I could, but I just, I gotta go away just for a little while. You see he looks down and he goes, I like that we have the same name, but mom said that I'm gonna start going by my middle name

cause that's grandpa's name and that's a strong name. And you hear in the backgrounds, you hear your ex go. Edgar! Edgar it's time to go, say goodbye. Yeah, you know your mom's right the Edgar's Edgar's a strong name, but you'll always be my Henry You see he smiles and he goes okay. Well, I'll see you later You see just yet. Holy kid just has no idea that like you're leaving just thinks like yeah

Tomorrow I'll see dad and it's normal you flash back to the real world and your Constitution lowers by four it sounds about right the next Fia you are at the edge of a mountain town you are a young girl dark forest all around you you are near a dirt road that heads west into the mountains. You are watching as a carriage pulls away carrying your best friend. Out of the back window, you see a girl with silver hair and pointy ears is crying and waving back at you as she disappears into the hills. I wave to her.

She waives and you see her. I tried to smile so that she will smile also. You see, she smiles back, but her eyes are just all, all sadness. You clutch your new spellbuck to your chest and you hear it pipe up. Miss, why, why is is Arena on the carriage? I thought we were supposed to go. Um, because I think it is safer for me to take the valve for this one. So Arena is going, I've given her accommodation.

She will be okay. They wanted to kill her, okay? You hear Bookfar goes, I'm sorry I got you on the trouble, Miss. No, Bookfar, it's not your fault. Honestly, it's my fault. Irina will be better. She will have a good life. And I will figure out this mess here.

Fiya, you suddenly feel a hand slap Book far out of your hands and then grab your wrist. Um, and you look up into the face of a man, cheekbones poking through his gaunt face, clad in all black, with a silver chain around his neck with scales on each side. And he goes, you are very foolish girl. Arena has trickstered in her and she was meant to be judged so we could cleanse her soul. Then judge mine instead. If you want someone to put on your fancy scale, put me. Arena is gone. You will not be able to find her. I tried to help you daughter.

She will go in your place. and very well you will go in hers. Any grabs your wrist, begins pulling you towards the town. We cut back to reality. Fiya, you take three constitution damage. Oh, and Henry, I'll say that because she is pulling at you with these ghostly tendrils, go ahead and give me another charisma save to see if she can help you get Sebastian out. Cool. Okay, yeah, let's let this ghost do me one favor.

Shout out to the two crew. Good God, you're still possessed. Oh, of course. Zirk, that is your turn. Cool. Um, can I use my action to basically do everything I can to assist Fia in performing this ritual? Like, I want to douse her hand in rose water and give her the help action for whatever she needs to do. Awesome. Yes. So you pull out a little bottle of rose water. Douse, Fia's hand so that her fist is like glowing with this holy energy as she begins to like do the ritual and Fiya will be able to roll it flat now instead of with disadvantage. Cool.

Um, as a bonus action, can I healing word somebody? Yes. I met seven. Oh, dofia, dofia. Do Henry! I know that the Finn Roses are a Jared's family, but here every kiss begins with K! And I draw and I scream the word K and K is the healing word I use to give FIAM or HP. That's going to be 5 HP.

Sweet. Thank you so much So at least I can do that back into double digits and that is Henry's turn what will Sebastian have you do? Henry is going to reach in grab a bunch of her bones and Use a dash act and start taking off down the hall. Someone tripped me.

Get these boats out of here! Tripped me! That is Fias turn. I was thinking I might use silent image and create Sebastian, like an image of him, and then put my little hand that contains his key, so right where the image's mouth would be. Sweet.

So Zirk runs over, douses your hand with rose water, you hold your hand out and create an image of Sebastian, then push your palm forward at the banshee with all this energy. Go ahead and make a religion check. We'll say, because of, we'll say, Zerk helping you, makes it a flat roll, so, Aston helping you makes an advantage now.

Okay, great. And as I do this, my glowing weapon with favor goes away because they are both concentration. So DC 15 for the ritual to be successful. Yes, I got a 16! Good! I'm a 12. You see burst of chaotic trickster energy explodes from Fia's hand, and you hear the

banshee wails, and it reverberates across the room. But you see that she appears. You see her image begins to morph and looks a little bit smaller. You see she is now blue. You see her hair, again, locks of hair that almost look like tendrils and these red eyes, but she appears. That is the layer action again. She is going to try to tether to everybody.

She's gonna try to grab everyone again. First one is against Fia. 14 to hit misses. Next one is against Zerk. 20 to hit hits. Does hit. Next one is against Henry. Nat 20. Absolutely hits. It doesn't do any damage so that's good actually

I'll say with a nat 20 tether she not only grabs Henry's heart But you feel Sebastian pulled out if you're going like oh Yeah, fuck you dude See we are on the same side Sadie be bulk hate Sebastian Fuck you dude. See we are on the same side. Say the V-Bulk hates Sebastian. You see her fingers have like warped and elongated to be in each one of your hearts, and she is also frozen Sebastian.

Trying to go down the hall. You just have a bunch of bones in your hands. Ah, keep the bones partner! You are not partners. On initiative 13, everyone who got hit, so just Henry and Zirk, you guys once again have flashes of terrible memories, and you guys are both going to take constitution damage. Hmm, Henry, you take three.

Jesus. And Zirk, you take three Jesus and Zerke you take three Yeesh, so just so everyone knows if you ever go down to zero you die zero con. Yeah, zero HP you die No zero. Yes, yeah, right? Zer Hp you don't die zero con you do um oh goodness Zerke that is your turn So you guys just so you guys know there's no riddle to this. You guys have done the ritual to weaken her. You need to weaken her further and then you can like banish or free her. I look at this banshee and I say when it comes to weakening constitutions, two can play at that game and I pull out a flask that is full of this like sick nasty looking liquid that is definitely at least 50% bile.

Oh my god. And I shake it up, and I pop the cork, and I cast ray of sickness on the ghost. Whoa. Oh. Did she make a save? The target takes 2D8 poison damage and must make a constitution saving throw.

Nice. Go ahead and do the 2-D8 first. Oh, let me make a spell attack real quick. That's going to be a 21. That super hits. And since she's a banshee, I imagine her mouth is always open, so this is going right in her mouth. Great.

Okay, so that's only seven damage from the poison, but then yeah, let's see if she passes the con. A sweet, yeah, you throw this potion in her open mouth. You see there's this explosion as puffs of green gas fill her body. She makes what kind of safe? Constitution saving throw. To not be poison.

11 to save. Ooh, my spell safety is 13. Great. And that would happen. On a failed save, it is also poisoned until the end of your next turn. Sweet, so you all get advantage on her. Guys, I poisoned a ghost.

Did you eat bad scampi? No, there's no such thing. Don't talk about scampi! That is Henry's turn. Okay, I know it might not seem like it, but I swear I'm not on Sebastian's side. Why do you pop Sebastian? I hate that guy.

Why? I really do hate that guy. We're not partners. He's so many times. We're not partners. That said, I am gonna try to punch you with my claws and I apologize. Sweet, you get advantage.

Because she's boys, because she had bad scams. So that is 19 to hit. Super hits. 13 damage. Sweet, you guys see Henry goes up, takes like a boxer stance, and then starts swinging hooks with his new claws, and you see her body morphs as Henry's claws go through it. It almost looks like, it looks like claws going through smoke, but it is like dispersing it. And almost looks like it looks like claws going through smoke,

but it is like dispersing it. And then as a bonus action, I'm gonna turn around and say to my shadow, are you gonna help or not? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha of you but with shadowy eyes like you saw before and goes I fuck it just kind of like a bad version of you goes I what can I do let's see I'm gonna action surge whoa hey okay so I'm gonna swing again at this ghost let's see if it hits that's a 17 to hit. Super hits. That's a nine damage.

Nice. And then tell me what, I'm just gonna read this. Unleash incarnation. I can heighten my Echo's fury. Whenever you take the attack action, you can make one additional melee attack from your Echo's position. Whoa, sweet.

That means that my, yeah. So the Shadowhank is also going to make an attack. You see Shadowhank has Shadow Claws that come out. He goes, ah, that fucking r. That, I look for the Shadow Guild. Does he have one? Yes, he has Shadow Gills. I could swim under Shadow Water. All right.

Shadow Hank, you know you're- I love Shadow Water. You're not required to speak. You're my favorite Gatorade flavor. Oh, he sounds just like you. Oh, Shadow Hank only rolled a 10. Ah! Shadow Hank really shits the bed.

Ah, fuck. Get Shadow Hank's Gil some water. Messes right. Big time does not do it. Fia, that is your turn. Okay. Fiya is going to sheat her blade for the moment. I think she's going to look at the specter and say, we are on your side just so you know, we are trying to help you. Um, and then she's going to cast a second level guiding bolt. Whoa. Woo. So I will roll, we've advantage, thus a 17 hit.

Yes. So I already rolled it on my app. That's 21 radiant damage. Fia, holy shit. You blast this beam of radiant energy. You see that the banshee begins to morph and whale. You see swirls of dark blue energy. You see that the banshee begins to morph and whale. You see swirls of dark blue energy. There's flashes of white light. You're going to make an attempt now to either banish it or free it. The sort of the knowledge of the blades that you would have from Batilda and that you would also

learn from the book is that banishing something essentially just sends it away from this plane in its corrupted state. Freeing it is harder, but it like cleanses the soul and it brings them back to what they were so that they can ascend as they were. If you do the banishments, you can roll with advantage on your religion check. If you do the freeing option, you just roll it flat. I have the trickster's blessing still, and I would never banish to an unknown place so that it will sometimes harm someone in the future.

I'm going to go for freeing. Great. It's once again DC-15. I got a fucking 15 on the dice. Oh! You need me to even add anything to it. Yes. Yeah.

Describe how you free the spirit. I think that I hold my hand out with the kiss on it it I want to hold my hand out in the silent image of Soestion and mother a little Efficient of a wed of a wedding And we will sit down to bear witness Is there craft some rings? Do you? Sebastian takes

Sadie to be your lovely vetted wife Yes to be your lovely vetted wife. Yes! You say, D. Take so as you to be your lovely vetted husband. You see that the banshee takes the form of a ghost. You see this translucent woman in a simple peasant stress. You see she wears a bright red ruby necklace. You see it's the only thing on her that is not glowing blue, but she no longer looks menacing. She just looks like a young woman that is translucent blue.

As she sees the image of Swaystian standing in front of her, she goes, Oh, um, so I asked you know a wedding right now, I thought maybe we'd have a long, a long engagement, travel for a bit, so we're supposed to get out of town and maybe go to the capital and see the world. I object. Missy read this situation. She looks past the projection and sees all of you and looks very confused, looks like she maybe was not aware of what she was doing when she was the banshee and looks around and just goes, where am I?

It's so cold here. You are in the crypt. You have been hurting people because you got hurt. Oh. One of the rugs they hurt you? You see she nods and she goes, I was waiting at the crossroads for so hasty, but the carriage that we were supposed to take came before he arrived. There was a man on it, and he was so frightening.

And there was someone else too. They were both from the rooks. They got into an argument. The smaller one said that the job was to send me off on the carriage with some gold so I wouldn't come back. But the big one, the big one said, you see she morphs into the image of Fergus Whitlock holding a dagger. No, you're splitting hairs here. The real job is to make sure she don't marry the Baron's son. It don't matter either way if I keep the gold. Then you see Fergus swipes the dagger and you see she turns back into the ghost of Sadie Bellwater. And that's the last thing I remember. Miss Sadie, I will find this man who did this to you and I will kill him and he will never find

his bones because I will bury each one so far from each other. Um, Fiya, you see... Spritele begins to glow bright green and goes between you and her. You see Sadie morphs into a form that is reminiscent of the banshee with red eyes, but with a playful smile. And she goes, I still would very much like for justice to be served. If you would do this for me, I would very much take you up on it. I will see to it.

I'm going to help her do it. Oh yeah, we're in hell. I'm sorry that I tried to orchestrate a wedding for you and you saw through it, but honestly, I'm sure you're better off on your own. I've met Swayce and maybe you can do better. You see she nods and she goes, I was thinking as I was waiting out there that perhaps someone who couldn't get out from under their parents, them might not have been worth waiting for. Yes.

Could you do me one more favor? Yes, of course. Could you bury me in the regular graveyard? Absolutely. Would you like a casket and how would you like me to ornament your grave? Ah, she goes. I'd like to be outside again. Somewhere where I can see the sunset. There's a great picnic spot right outside the bar.

Yeah, that's right. I could borrow a shovel from someone. Well, we don't have any full-sized shovels, but a trowel then. A grave within walking distance of a bar. Okay, I asked for anything more. Here, here. And you see, you all have made this pact to bring justice to Fergus Whitlock. You see Spritell goes green and you see you really don't need to do that Spritell. Branch come out between you three and the Banshee and she just goes thank you.

Yes it will be easy I'm sure of this. Good luck out there, if you ever need a couple of wing people when you're cruising for ghost. Dick, let us know. That was really such an off-putting phrase. Probably just going to a stand to thank you. Whatever, whatever you want. Say, Dave, would you like me to do anything with this necklace? Do you have family I can bring it to?

It will fetch a pretty penny. I once gave my dowry away for such reasons. You see, she once again turns into the banshee form and rubs her chin. I don't recall much after everything went dark, but I do recall something with the necklace. This necklace was stolen from me. I was not clutching it when I died. It was brought back to me by the smaller rook. Hmm. Hmm.

Someone named Siebe. Perhaps I don't know their name, but truthfully I think it was maybe more for them than it was for me. I don't have much use for this necklace. I would give it to you as a gift if you would take it. Fia holds out her neck for it to be put on. Henry fumbles with the class book bar book bar you're stepping her dude you're stepping her it's so small Fia elegantly just waits for her to be put on her we're trying to close the clause yet

Henry and book bar take way too long trying to put the necklace on but eventually you do have this Rubin necklace thank you so much, Sady. I will absolutely disperse the bones of those who wrong you. She smiles. We're going to flush those bones. Please, please flush the bones. Yeah.

Would you like one last kiss from So Ashton? Or would you prefer one from Bukfar? You see, she looks in Bookfar and she goes, wow, away from me to physically express my love for reading. He makes the main cheese. And you see she plants a kiss on Bookfar and Bookfar goes, oh, oh my, I'm in love with ghosts now, oh no. Oh no. You always watch a bookfar, This isn't your first ghost crash, pianist.

And you see Sadie. Oh, learning so much. Fades away, but you all feel bound to this pact to defeat Fergus Whitlock. So I was kind of like really talking myself up, but Fergus is really strong and I'm really scared about how we're going to get his bones. Oh, yeah, he almost killed me with his hands So and then you guys hear the spirit of Bastion Fenrose go we did it everyone

Attack him with my soul Go ahead and make a attack. I'm with the with a claw. OK, at least a dirty 20. Dear damage. I wronged two ones, but that still becomes a six. Sebastian is still hanging on. I'll say. I will say he goes next. He goes next in the order after Fia.

So he is going to use a dash and fly off down the hall. I'll get my, I'll use my fucking bonus action. She's just fucking. My, my echo, if hasn't been unsummoned, they get an opportunity attack. Okay. If any of you guys are right there, yeah. That's a 24 to hit.

It's, I rolled two sixes on that great sort of shadow Henry finish this ghost. Whoa, holy shit. I I'm watching the ghost run away and I just see shadow Henry step out from the wall and and he says, ah, you ain't getting outta here, buddy. That's a lot of that catchphrase. That is not a bad catchphrase. You're getting better. There was only a lot of fights

that we could use this evening. I like shadow Henry. Shadow Henry slashes through Sebastian and he goes, no, my balls were never returned. Finally, my crypt was ready for me, but my bones. And just purses. It's kind of fucked up that now my whole life's purpose is just finding annoying fucks and making sure

their bones do not find one resting place together. It's just a big part of being a blade. Life does have a purpose, and that's the important thing. Scattering the bones of my enemies. There are worse jobs. Think of it as like weird little picnics. So you all stand in the script, having freed the broken heart banshee, Sadie Bellwater, having banished the ghost, Sebastian Fenrose the sixth,

and you have a lot of plotting to do, deciding how A, you get the info out of Madam Whitlock, now that you've dealt with this horror, while also plotting to kill her brother. And that is where we'll end our session. What? We done. We really need a sprite lawyer.

I am, yes. I am very worried about the fight I have for our maid. Spryddle, what the fuck? Sometimes you're just being polite, spryddle, not everything's a contract. Yeah, we have to go over like a queue when we're lying and when we're like comforting someone. It's bridal. If you ever heard of a handshake deal, it's like be a little more informal about this. We need the space to send a text afterwards and

bail. Sweet. Thank you everybody for listening. Yes. Please head on over to patreon.com slash nad pod. That's naddp.od. Don't sing yet If you'd like to listen to our after show Um, does anybody have anything else to plug? Yeah, our pop-up thing is still for sale. Yeah You can check that out over at makeship.com. I believe there are less than two weeks left To get your order in for a plush pop-up. So check it out. Get your own most rambulman. We also have a pop-up lawyer version,

which is available via our merch club on Patreon as well. If you want to upgrade to the Deluxe Possum experience, you can do that for the choice of yours. Deluxe Possum experience. If you try to put a blazer on a possum in real life, it's not gonna go well for you. But we have a lot of chances for a blazer on a possum. Adam, we're all out of all of the wild animals.

Possum is the one I would most be comfortable putting a blazer on. That's true. And it would look the best in one. It would look the best in one. We'd add of our cat food in the backyard and there's survival instincts are terrible. I'll just come outside and they'll just look at me

and I'll be like, you need to run. You don't know if I'm not a part of it. What am I doing at my dining room? You crazy guy. I'm one of two humans that loves you and anyone else would be mad at you right now. Okay, so three options. You can get the pop-off from makeshift.

You can get the lawyer pop-off from patreon or you can try to get a Possum to play dead and just shimmy a blazer. Yeah, we can just send you a possum from her backyard. We have a lot there They're really high-patriotic on tier though. We got we had Babies that turned into mommas that are now I our babies again. We have new babies Gonna become a project babies grow to be mommas Anyway, thank you all so much for listening We have new babies. I'm gonna become a pro at your babies grow up to be mama. Anyway, thank you all so much for listening. You can follow us on Twitter at sagemerfistmeat.com

at call this call the well, at the extra dimly and at chakar versus Jake and you can tweet about the show using hashtag nag pod that's n-a-d-d-p-o-d. We are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are, we are. We are the new come The Venetian! The show's one of our worst sigilons. Yeah, but with the word, we've had so much of that. It's the end of the show everyone and you know what that means.

We need to shout out our benevolent council of elders. Starting of course with Brad D. Jeffrey S. Haldor Frostback Steelbreaker and Matt M. The team of writers who penned the script for Huckfish, a movie about a man with freakish bone claws. Critics are calling it like Wolverine, but sad. Jordan DJ, Cutter W, Gybe G, Zolo Dolo, and Dylan B, a skeleton catering staff via hired for Sadie's marriage to the silent image of Sebastian. It's probably for the best the wedding didn't work out though because all of their food was made of dirt and spiders.

Shoeburt the mushroom, Danielle the Dastardly Dame, Andrew M, Beardman Dan, and Scott D, fairy lawyers who help get unwilling humanoids out of spright contracts. They're extremely reliable, but will charge you a fortune and gum drops for their services. Danny P. Alainacy, Mixologist Michael McD and Balnor's boy, A.K. Victor T. Merchants at the Rosewater Tonic Emporium. Every week, Fia comes in and uses the disguise self-spelt to absolutely decimate their free sample station. Andrew B, Justin I, TJ M, the Noem Barbarian, Alaina M, Traylae the Cray Faye, and Jared

E, Fenrose Honor Guards who witnessed barren Sebastian's painful death on the toilet as punishment for not helping the Reaper force them to serve eternally as bathroom attendance and reverie. On the plus side though, they get all the free mence you can eat. Christopher B, Damio R, Jordan L, cyborg version of Josh the Cobalt, and Gage M,ants on Elderborn's newest game show. Find that trap! Each player has 30 minutes to stumble into a crypt and trigger as many traps as possible. The winner gets 100 gold and a lifetime supply of Poison Dark antidotes.

Skokilla, Destincy, Richardx Machina, Kelvin Nudel, Sergio Salazar, Salaman, Sakurai, Tasequani, and Trast the Traveller, the skilled artisans of House Jared. For centuries they have feuded with their dreaded rivals, House K, for control of the affordable jewelry market. Jury S. Dana G. Calum L. Ryan and Jack L. The blade otters from which all blade oil is excreted. a rare breed, but a surprisingly peaceful one. Flulless whale, temporal, Sam L, Nicholas C, and Reese NS, Papa Sebastian's crew of Ghost

Buds that haunts the crypts with eerie warbles but all shit warbles each other whenever one of them isn't there. How about that? Samuel B, Mike H, Matthew E, Colton B, and Adam G, Bone Claw, Glove Makers, instead of fingerless gloves, they make knuckleless gloves, Sheik and terrifying. Mateo C, Eric B, Panama James, Adrian the Halfling Bard, and John H.N,

a bunch of deal breaking sprites. That's right you've met the cute deal making sprites, but wait till you see the fangit, tuskid deal breakers. Dan, Nikki W, Grace G, Drew Nasty, and Cece Lulu, the wedding planners who set up Black Thorn Hall for an elaborate reception for the lady Sadie and Sahuashton. Well, I hope they get their deposit back. Jay, Barnes & Aitor, Douglas A, Michelle O, and Luke H. A single and ready-to-mingle club for ghosts called Dead and Ready-to-Bed. Hey, there was a way Craser-Rime that we could have used, but we didn't. Ritterin, Timmy R, Lucas B, Aaron S, and Kevin M, a competitive food-eating team who just

won Thorncork's Shrimpoth, and will spend the rest of the year exclusively referred to as the Scampions. Austin C, Hogg Fishes average hog. Wow, okay. New York, Steven C. and KJ. Manicurists who Henry visited to try to get his brand new bone clause polished. They took one look at him and ran away. And they didn't even notice the clause. Michael M. Raoul and Mike K. Maxwell C. and Nick L.

Sadie's friends who all planned to bail her out on her wedding day by objecting when the time came. Now that is for Renship. Quaranty, Eccathor 666, Polly of House Croom, Happy Birthday, Justin Raccoon, and Nick W. Some of the townsfolk who chased Zirk out of town throwing rocks at his carriage. They didn't have any uncured illnesses. They just love rock throwing. Robert F. Esmi M. Spartagnus, Nathan, and Kazamir, they all know him.

Henry's son's new babysitters, that's right. Edgar's stepdad is so cool that he can afford five babysitters, even Nathan, who charges 10 golden hour. Big bad beer on the mat, Eric McD, Burley T, Axel A, and Nero Cautius Caesar Augustus Germanicus. These are getting wagging a luvit. Shramping captains who own their own fleet of Shramping boats and make literally all their money selling to the Baron for his endless appetite of scampy Christian a J dragonborn Jonathan O the sendrayan and Ben a pool cleaners who are absolutely loaded because they get so much work

Cleaning shrimp me out from the Baron's pool chlorine and shrimp.o boy fell donnis Dave H. Catherine S. David K. and Christian S. Postomakers whose business is only doing fine because the Baron actually prefers to bargain hunt at big box stores for both pasta. Keith K. Brittany B. Kyle H. Emilio D, and Frankie Koala, members of the Fenerose Honor Guard, feeling very conflicted about defending Sebastian. Frankie took a deliberately long lunch break to let him fend for himself. Ashton S, Blair, the bug Blair, Barbarian, pork chop, Chanel M, Argent 31, and Christian P. Gastroenterologists who are currently studying Sebastian

Fenrose's inability to have bowel movement. Okay, we're going there. They think he should maybe stop the sing-song moaning since it might be making his aides cledge too much. Oops, there we went out even further. Alice, Minette F. Pat L. Lauren H. Matthew J. L. and Jan Janina E the Banshee's other lovers before Soession. Turns out she breaks a lot of hearts. Maddie Y the eldest Barry Ryan S the bone duster Joshua H and

Robyn CRS B skeletons whose middle fingers have all been stolen from the same Zonk style hijinks luckily they can all just yell fuck you to get their point across address a big bad Mac Brentley C Demar B Micah B and Carly Ann Fia's running coaches They found that the easiest way to get her to train is to put a pool on one end of the track and she sprints right to it Clarke of the thunder fuck Or hey see Connor Savage B chef and Russell H

Jewelers who sold gems to Fenstone crypt. They are not dishonest jewelers though the Fen roses Specifically requested cuba Zirconia because they didn't want anything too shiny. Christopher J.O. Cole H. Logan S. Leviathan. Demi. And Bioquart 7. SeaWorld trainers who are looking to capture the newly-gilled Henry and put him on display.

Interestingly, life locked in an aquarium would kind of be an improvement for Henry. So go right ahead! And that's it for this week! Thank y'all so much. I tell you what, y'all just tickle our hearts week after week. Bye, Sweeties! That was a hitgun podcast. That was a headgun podcast.