Not Another D&D Podcast - Eldermourne - Ep. 6: The Rook's Gambit

Episode Date: November 20, 2020

The Choo Choo Crew embarks on a mission to free Sewastian and take down the Whitlockes. Henry gets greedy with his appetizers, Zirk employs Bookvar as a medical assistant, and Fia learns the fate of an old friend. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content!Music / Sound Effects Include:"Club chatter, London" by mlteenie at Freesound.org."Grimhawke" by Emily Axford."Shadowfell" by Emily Axford."Bonkginya, Fia Bonkginya" by Emily Axford."A Friend for Life" by Emily Axford."Batilda's Blade" by Emily Axford."Unknown Tome" by Emily Axford."The Lonely Autumn" by Emily Axford."A Fate Refused" by Emily Axford."Fia" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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with brush processing. Code P-A-W-P-A-W. Goodbye, Sweeties. ["Morning"] Welcome to the campaign after the campaign after the campaign. This is not another D&D podcast. ["Morning"] Welcome back to Elder Morn, everybody. Elder Morn.

I'm your dungeon master, Brian Murphy joined by Jake Hurwitz. Hockey honk honk. Nope. Emily Axford. Honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honkonk for vonk aka a caboose dwelling dude who loves making juice for the chuchu crew 11 well short rest of the main feed finally Yes, it will be legitimized if you are not um our One of our patreon subscribers. You were not clued in are one of our Patreon subscribers. You were not clued in last short rest. The crew decided to name themselves the Chuchu crew. I believe credit goes to Jake. I believe it was Jake who whipped that one

out. I don't know if I want credit or if I deserve it. I don't think I don't know if I deserve it. I think it's perfect. I mean I mean, I don't have one track mine, and on that track, it's too, too, too, too, too, too. It's the truth, you're correct. I don't like any of this. I don't like the way we intro the shows. I don't like the name. I just had to get honky honk, honk,

out, and now I'm done. I'll go back next week, I swear to God. I have completely given up on rhymes, and I'm fully just gonna say something stupid. Oh, that's a new dynamic, I love it. Very good, I'm sure that will age well after 70 or 80 episodes. What are you gonna do about it, dude? You can't make us change our names.

All you can do is kill us. Don't give them any ideas. So I guess you can make us change our names. Yeah, I will, I also edit the show. I'll just, I'll bring in freaking old bev rhymes if I need to. All right. It's what the people want.

That's what the people want. Okay, everybody, I'll tell you what the people want. They want a little recap. So last time you guys buried a Sadie Bellwater in a deluxe grave, then headed back into Thorn Kirk. There, you noticed a strange crowd in the town square, a bunch of knights wearing the petty king's colors. You were flagged down by Marcy, who informed you that a royal edict was cast down from the petty king, Brightleep, stripping the Baron of his

lands, throwing him in jail and naming Madame Whitlock the Baroness of Thorncirk. Marcy lost her job as captain of the townguard to Fergus Wittlock and wondered allowed why the crown would legitimize the rooks. She gave you a rundown of the jailhouse. Should you decide to confront Fergus there and supply you with a set of keys. Next, you visited Madame Wittlock at the Baron's keep and walked in on her, talking to a man named Petty Jack. Jack inferred that the Petty King was surrounding himself with Reaper worshipers recently, including a sorceress and a former blades who had switched sides. As Petty Jack got up to leave,

Fia spotted Batilda's blade at his side. Before you could chase him, though, you had to prove to Madam Whitlock that you had banished the Broken Heart Banshee that was killing the rooks. After doing so, Madam Whitlock gave you Dr. Neville's intended location, a mountain pass in the scale-tip valley of Innerboro. You said you're goodbyes, and headed to the town square to stalk Petty Jack and retrieve the sword. Fia created a duplicate, Zirk dozed him with X-lacks and Hank sent Shadowhank aka Shank into the woods where he was able to swap the swords successfully while Petty Jack was shitting. The next day, you went to Black Thorn Hall to top to Sib and discovered them plotting

their own rebellion against the Whitlocks with some rogue veterans. Sib suggested that your interests could align and that it might justify working together. And that's where we are now. All righty. So you're all at Black Thorn Hall, loud talking all around you.

This is a rowdy bunch. Obviously, cigar smoke fills the air. Sib, I stands over your table, or doesn't stand over your table. I forgot, is sitting AC Slater Style. Correct. I could never do that with my back. Yeah.

Sib is speaking to you guys kind of conspiratorially, near this table of these other hardened outlawslaws many of them with rook tattoos of their own Sib, I do have a one further question before we try to take down furgus It is just a curiosity that has been bubbling in my head Why would the crown legitimize this move? Do you know you seem quite high in the picking order of this organization? Do you know why? Thanks. I do present as very high status, but actually Madame Whitlock kind of has shoved me out of the inner circle and I very much

am not in the know about a decent amount of stuff. However, I do have an answer to your question. I don't know why the petty king owes Madam Whitlock a favor, but I know how she got it. I know how she got the favor. You see, they pull out a stack of papers. Wow, all those papers in your pocket. Pulled up like origami. Wow.

Or was it you have a big pocket for a hoodie? Why did I know I have like a pack with me? Do you specify every time like all of the things in your pack? Do you think you're the only one with a pack Fia? Having fun Both of you put the knives down I pace around the table like an angry dog It then comes to the back down

That's what we're saying I'm sorry, you're good at hiding my bags Anyway, it's an LLB Wow Sip goes Whitlock usually keeps her office locked up I'm sorry, I'm good at hiding my bags. Anyway, it's an LLB. Wow. Sip goes, Whitlock usually keeps her office locked up. She's got an office here at Black Thorn Hall, but with her move to the Baron's keep, she got sloppy

and I was able to slip in and grab a few things off her desk. And I put them into my bag, which I have. I have a number of items that I don't announce whenever I meet somebody Cool, I like all the keychains. Let's see what you can't believe though Really getting roasted for this See it takes another angry lab You guys are both gonna need to cool it all right

Sorry, there's a here. There's a big roast culture here at the black door hall We have roast we have roasts twice a week. To the point where nobody has any more jokes about anyone. I mostly hang out with books, so roasts think it's really new for me and I'm trying to understand it better. Books don't roast you, except for Philip. Philip bag goes into roast mode. Oh, you know, fear you're a cleric and a wizard. That's right. Because you don't have enough wisdom to see that you're a crappy wizard. That crossed the line. I don't understand because actually I have both

wisdom and intelligence. Is this one of those roasts because it hurts? I'm still up at Pimits. Henry's here. Why? No, be careful. Okay. Okay. Sir, I love it. Mr. Sir, Mr. Henry, I need you to gently start to roast me so I can get better at being roasted. If that's roasting, I have been cut to the core and I want nothing to do with it. If that's roasting, you've been braised. Sip continues. Yeah, so she got sloppy and I was able to grab

a few things off their desk. She got a message about a month ago from a guy named Petty Jack. This guy was the leader of a gang called the Bed Fellows, which was an alliance of smaller gang called the Bedfellows, which was an alliance of smaller gangs across out of Burl. May I just interrupt very quickly to say the gangs and organized crime have very good names here

in Eldom. Thanks, yeah, we don't get to vote on them. We don't get to vote on the leader. That's mostly, you know, you make, you know, alliances with people and then kind of play against each other and kill people and stuff, but we're very democratic when it comes to the names. Okay, you take it very again. Yeah, so anyway, listen, Petty Jack was a notorious enemy of the crown and it's been locked away for the past 10 years, but apparently was let out for the express purpose of getting these notes to

his criminal contacts. Sib opens up this folder and you see on a piece of paper is a detailed sketch of Dr. Nebel. What? But he looks younger. You see his white hair on the side is drawn with salt and pepper. He looks a little younger. He's got the bald part at the top of his head, instead of being completely bald,

has like a receding hairline. Hot Nebel, where'd you get this? He does look really good. That's a fierce widow's peak, if ever I've seen one. It's really making it work. I could see why he hung onto it so long without shaving his head. I wish I could have a widow's peak.

Ooh, I would look so good. Actually, you know what, I have baby bangs. I reveal I do have a video speak. Ooh, I would look so good. Actually, you know what? I have baby bangs. I reveal I do have a video speak on me. Oh, you see it? See it looks extremely jealous and goes, seems like we all have our secrets.

Whether they be secret bags or secret widows peeps. I shake their hands. Water under the bridge. Suddenly, suddenly your great friends now. What just happened? Next to the sketch of Nebel, you see information about his approximate height, weight, last known whereabouts.

This essentially looks like a wanted poster, but instead of something that's kind of posted publicly, this looks like this was sent around privately. And you see that sort of like a bounty. Exactly. And you see his name here is listed as Arthur Penley. Penley. And Sib continues and goes, Penley was hiding out here under the alias Dr. Nebel, and apparently they've been looking for him for quite some time long enough that it warranted essentially

Resurrecting the bedfellows to find him in the underworld. So that's that's what happened Dr. Nebel went to the rooks for help Madame Whitlock sold them out and the crown or people Close to it are behind the attack here in Thorncork. Okay. So really the conspiracy that we are uncovering is not necessary. Madame Whitlock is sort of just from the impression I get from this. She is making the most of a situation but maybe smaller beans in a big bean stew. She wants to run this time.

You know what your metaphor is actually perfect, big bean stew. We need to find out who's cooking the stew. We gotta find who the Matsubales. We don't know who's cooking the stew, but we do know who some of the beans are right now. Yes, this is a metaphor that but till the normalize to me. I just can't believe that Aloysius Neppel was a fake name. It sounds so real. It sounds so real. It's going to say the same thing. It's mainly real and believable. May I prove further this, this wanted poster for Mr. Penley?

Yeah, go ahead and give me I guess like an. Uh, what are you looking for in particular? I would like to see what, uh, you know, in-in quotations, crimes, uh, the character is wanted for. Sure. That's a naturally baby! Oh! Tell us who's cooking the stew! Holy shit! Um...

Ha! You-you-you don't know who's cooking the stew, but you do see whoever is looking for Dr. Nebel is definitely hunting blades. You see that the language of it is very much like, this is an enemy of the crown, they're conspiring against followers of the Reaper. The crown, the petty King's crown,

or a larger crown. The petty King's crown. Tiny crown. And I'll say within that 20, I'll count that a little towards like insight and stuff. This very much seems like this was written by somebody who is like a priest or priestess of the Reaper, just the wording of it.

It's just so much more religious and angry at this person for being part of the trickster, then like a normal royal edict kind of would. Okay, Fia memorizes all of the information on this, then turns to her companions and says, may I please take out some small rage by shredding this paper in my hands? By my it's zip that that cool with you. Yeah, it's actually my paper Fia, but Yes, I said my companions I think by your companion now Do you want to be I gave your hand a shake and said water under the bridge? That is how you make a companion no the you see eyes swelling up. Yeah, no cool

Yeah, I guess you can be companions whatever whatever losers this dude. Who's this guy points at Henry? This dude is even like to sit like AC Slater. I was. I stand up to challenge Tim, but instantly pull something. Ah! You know what? You're not worth it, pal. Okay, I feel like, uh, fucking goes to town shredding the piece of paper like a little child with all of her anger at this Anti-trickster language. Damn those are some tiny shreds I'm ready for a ticerte parade

Avengers So you see sip continues and goes so look I know a civil war within the rooks isn't your fight but We can still be of use to each other as like companions or whatever, if you wanna call it that, if you wanna say friends, okay, like, am I gonna stop you?

From what I learned to become a friend, a fairy must dance around you. You see a spryddle come down. Oh no, okay, all right, and begins going around. And you see, Sib instantly puts their hands up and goes, I'm not making any promises right now. Okay, this is really quick. Oh, cool, yeah, keep it quick for that.

Any kind of eternal friend pack or something, but let's just, let's say buddies for now. Mm-hmm. I'm sorry, I missed the situation. Sib goes, the situation. This bridal takes a half lap for a buddy's for now. Right, okay. This bridal takes a half lap. Nice. You see, Sib goes, I can pull enough people on my side that I should be able to drag Madame Whitlock out of the keep, but I can't do it with Fergus around.

So if you can take him out, I'll do my damnedest to make sure Madame Whitlock isn't around to punish you for it. Because if you kill Fergus and she finds out she will chase you to the ends of the earth. This Fergus you travel with him. Does he have any kind of weaknesses or perhaps a weakness could be a soft spot like Henry's bad back. It could also be a passion something someone can never say no to like me in a cigar Yeah, he's dumb as hell Alright and he's

Distic so if I had to guess where he was right now I would say he's probably in the dungeons beating the shit out of the old baron if he's not dead already damn I really hate the that that's happened to the question, you know He he gave me a roof over my head and outlets for my hot plates for a long time Yeah, no, he's he's not gonna last the day. I don't think okay Can I ask you did you ever blow out the outlet putting in six hot plates advance? There were many a time where I had to crawl under the keep and flip the fuse box. There were many a time.

Okay. So we know that there is this one cell that is not being used. We can infiltrate the jail right by using this one cell because some kind of commotion that perhaps would cause a furgus to enter the cell. If he is in a cell nearby. You see, we lock him in and do sort of a hell in a cell sort of thing with furgus. Now you're speaking my language, Codwell. I winked a sip.

Codwell gets advantage on all roles. You're gonna get wrestling reference. Yeah. Sib goes, you talking Undertaker first mankind? My friend indeed I am. So I guess here's the question. If we can get to this jail cell and we can attract Fergus there, maybe we look like real stately nobles that just need a good beaten and he runs over and then we trap him in the cell but how do we get to the cell we need to go through Marcy's office? You see Sid pipes up and goes if you've got some kind of tricky way to get down to the dungeons and all you need to do is to get into the jailhouse it wouldn't be that hard for you to just knock out some town guards and steal their armor.

You'd be able to blame for the easy. I've also got a spell that puts people to sleep. That would do it too. That'd be great. That's always a nice way to not kill a guard, you know, to just give them a nice good sleep. Yeah, I, you know, we take a rage out on paper and we put the guards to sleep. That's what we should do. You know, it's often the paper that makes the people do the bad things.

I wouldn't mind punching a scroll right now. For someone as well, Red, is you. You really hate words. Me? No, I love them. Because they're powerful, but like any other power, they can be manipulated by the rules. We have a passion for words, Zirk. You see, you put both are just slamming himself

into the bits of note. And because we love words, we really have to make sure that they're used correctly. You know what? Give me a piece of paper. I'm ripping one up too. Zirk tries to rip up a piece of paper and cannot do it. That's laminated.

That's a menu. That's a menu, my man. It's cursed. It's gotta be warded somehow. I'm eliminated if you guys want mozzarella sticks. Wow, I didn't know that black thorn hall had a deep fryer. Oh, apparently, is it still happier? I do absolutely want mozzarella sticks and if they have loaded skins, I know somebody else that could use some. So Henry like eats an appetizer platter as his cousin is maybe being tortured. Sweet, so you see, Sib goes, I think we should move as quickly as possible

because as soon as Madame Whitlock gets hunkered down, she'll have better defenses at the keep and she'll have an iron grip over the townsfolk here. Right now, everybody's confused and the time to make sure it doesn't slip fully into her grasp is now. Okay, I did I put an order in for a for some onion. So let's once that comes down. I leave a little short rest so I can get my one of my spells lots back. And I actually wouldn't mind looking at Volk to see if there are any creatures that lurk underground that we might run into.

In that case, I might get a main in addition to the ad. Yeah. You're then like a pastrami on Rye or something. You're the my the Baron's screams. You do look at the menu. I will look at wall. Sim goes I think they're grill is busted. So I think it's going to take like an hour for a burger

if you want to get a thing. Henry get back there. You got hot plate and you know how to use it. Oh yeah, I'll cook my own burger. See this is good dining. You cook your own food. You show up with a bunch of books to a bar and you cook your own food, you show up with a bunch of books to a bar, and you cook your own food!

Everyone's looking at us. Actually, that's a good question. Is there any sort of like, yummy food that Fergus likes that we could try to draw him over to the cell with? He's not a cartoon. I thought that was the weird stuff. He's not Wily Coyote. Does he love hot dogs? Yeah, like a big pile of hamburgers. But if I silent image a big pile of hamburgers

and sort of like a 1920s girl and a strapless dress saying, come here big boy. Yeah, like a pin-up or something. I have never seen him stick his nose up, sniff visible, sniff visible stink lines, and then hover towards food with his eyes closed. Have you ever seen his tongue roll out of his mouth when he saw a hoagie or something like that?

Never once. Okay. Sip, winferg is this is very important, Sip. Winferg is puts on a bib to eat a big meal. What image is on the bib? Is it a lobster? Is it a burger? We need to know.

It's just a regular ass bib. Confirmty does wear a bib. That's all we need. I would think a sadist would like to be covered in sauce, but this is my predilection. You see Sim goes, alright, well good luck. See you on the other side of all this. US Vel. Alright, companions or whatever. For the one who keeps saying the word.

Right, what is this guy? Oh heck! Knock it off. Before I knock you upside down. Oh, lock. It's locked. Can you sit back down? Come on.

I can't. Don't move me. Do not move me. Sib goes and joins the table of the other rucks. Cool. All right. Since we are waiting for appetizers and whatnot, I would like to try out a little school child dream that Betilda used to say to me before the event to hunt.

I've never done it before, but now that I have Betilda's blade in my scabber, I feel emboldened to try. Lair on us. Again, I don't know if it will work. I've never tried it. But I say, the sense of time, fall quick and steady. But may you be quicker, more eager and ready. And then I cast, I use three first level spell slots

because we're doing it since we're hanging out to cast Gift of Alacrity on all three of us, which we all get to add a D8 to our initiative roles for the next eight hours. Whoa, that's insane. Oh my God. That's really good. You know what, I'm gonna take a lap now.

Technically, they each, technically it's like three minutes, you know, it's a minute per spell casting. I technically wouldn't cast them all the same time. I just thought it was cute if we just, all have the same experience. It's really cute. Super cute. we just all have the same extremely cute. Super cute. Here's a question while we're preparing.

Fiat, do you think there's any spells or abilities you're going to be using in the battle that might require you to focus? Yes, I do have a little spell I've been thinking that right before we go into Fight Furricus, I will do. It's a little spell that we all get just a little kiss from the trickster. I call it the trickster's kiss, it's some call it bless. I like yours. Oh, I know what I'll be calling it.

I think I can maybe help you out to hold onto that kiss. If you are able to do that, then we will all be able to be a bit bolstered a bit longer. Zirk takes the salt shaker from the table and mixes it with some... Fia, Fia shies away like a slug. Careful. No, it's okay, it's okay. Watch out, watch out, miss. Watch out, miss.

My monster, you don't take it from me. No, I was gonna use it. I'm gonna make some smelling salts. And if you get hit, these will activate and you'll be able to maintain your focus. Fia holds out like the little space in between her thumb and her forefinger where you would put something to snuff.

No, you don't snuff it now. It's just you're gonna, it'll, all right, hold on, just close your eyes. I create like a little poultice, or basically a little sack full of this enchanted salt, and I hang it around Fia's neck. So basically, if she gets struck with a massive blow that would break her concentration, now this smelling salt will trigger an allergic focus. It is an artifice.

Can I hang it the little satchel next to the ruby on the necklace? Yeah, that's great. You're all decked out looking extremely witchy fia. Very witchy. But you're sure this won't steal my moisture, right? It might a little bit, but you know what, we can work on that. I can put together some lotions for you later. You book fire leans into you, Fien goes, Miss, I think the myth that salt melts witches is false. I think, I think, but just okay. But I have read too many books in which I witches melted my salt, okay?

Look, I'm freaking out to miss. You know I hate salt, okay? You know I'm freaking out. I don't see the ocean, but I fear the salt that lurks within it, okay? This is something you know about me. I don't see the ocean, but I fear the salt that lurks within it. Okay, this is something you know about me. I don't want to mince words, but you did just eat a bunch of french fries and you know those are comfort insult.

Feel, look at her hands and absolutely fear. You're okay. You are okay. Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man.

Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man. Keep it together, man. It does me, I give him my hands. Oh, and Henry, here's that bone claw potion for you. I put it in a syringe, so you should be able to just inject it real easy when you're ready for it. Okay, great. Yeah, so it comes into my body through a shot and then the bone claw's grow out of my hand. It feels like piercing both directions, but you are a doctor and I trust you.

Technically not a doctor and they trust you. So technically not a doctor. Thank you, Doc. Much of being a hunter is giving your body over to your craft. There's not a lot of my body left to give. But I do think if you wanted to shape the bones differently, as they're coming out, you could, if you wanted to just make big bone knuckles or just fortify the bones, I think you could do that.

But you are going to need to inject this directly in your products. That is not to be. All right, I hope I'll be able to get the angle. I might need a doctor's touch. So I guess either one of you docks. Oh, both of our, you're a doctor is... Well, I can handle it. I'm an assistant of all trades, really.

Oh, yeah. Yes. Give book for the syringe. He clasp his coversvers over the syringe and then he just ram it in few. Oh, okay. Wait till about an hour before, you want it to be primed about an hour before.

And let's do a delicate, just a gentle touch book. Yes. No need to ram anything. Oh, fly in as fast as possible. No, it'll be a quick stab. Why don't it does that to be quick? And don't let's not classify it as a stab, right? Right. Actually, what's better if you do it like right on this hill bone, not either of the butt cheeks.

Oh, the hill bone. Can't you give it a shank? Can you give it a shank and it'll have to affect the body? Don't worry, because actually actually Bookfar has done a spinal tap before. It's basically an epidural, you'll be fine. I've delivered a werewolf baby before, so... It was beautiful seeing the messy young pup in clutch between Bookfar's covers. You were the dirtiest book I've ever known. All right, well, I got some pigs in a blanket to go. So what do you, should we head out of here?

Okay, I'm Freddy. Like now's the time, sweets. You all get up and go to head out of Black Thorn Hall. You see, Sib gives you a little salute. You also recognize a couple of the rooks you see sitting there. You see one of them was the one who got really mad at Fia for reading books at the bar and gives you like a conciliatory nod. I'm still mad at them. I give them an arched eyebrow saying like you're still in trouble

with me. You see he looks down sheepishly. And you guys exit this bar, is there anything you want to do before you try to go to this jailhouse? How are you approaching what do you want to do to prep? Maybe before we go to this jailhouse. Perhaps we can ask Marcy if she has a way for us to get past the guards. Yes, she wants her job back. Yeah, do you think Marcy would still have enough sway with the guards at the jailhouse?

I think so. I mean, if she was losing her job so quickly, I would think that allegions don't change that quickly. Maybe she could say that she needs to get... Uh, she left her car keys there or something like that. that allegiance is don't change that quickly. Maybe she could say that she needs to get, she left her car keys there or something like that. She needs to pick them up. Or her six hot pots. Mm-hmm.

That's worth going back for. We can also ask her because she might have a better idea of East Shief if she thinks that she can be of help. She should be super hungover today, right? I know, she's going to be hungover. Okay, I lead the way, I go. Just to warn you all, her place is like really nice. Oh yeah?

Yeah, it's really nice. I only saw the door, but it's like a really nice door. Is that hers with a balcony? Yes, that was a balcony. Wow. I think she's leaving well. You head towards Marcy's. And as you're passing through the town square,

you see in the window that she is in the copper dagger drinking. The vendor has not ended. Can I knock on the window to say hello to her? Sure, you knock on the window. You hear him, buffled. Marcy. Hey, what's up, via?

Hi, Marcy. Is this a good time to talk? She's sitting at a table all by herself. And she just shrugs and goes, yeah, we have potato skins. No, no, no, we do not. We have those are spoken for. Yeah, shankos easy aren't giving up the potato skin. She doesn't want the shadows shank. We've got we've got pigs in the blanket. Okay, that's what we've got the last. I'm a spoke. We've got to save something later. Those things heat up great. Okay, you know what? Why don't she there's food at the at the

copper dagger too. So let's just. Yeah, it's bad. I don't think we're going inside. We're talking to her through the window. Larcy. Yeah, just muffle through the window. Do you want to come in? Do you want me to come out? No, this is fine. I'm fine here.

All right. Can you open the window with crack? No, it's not that kind of window. Sirk goes inside and talks to them from the window as well. Oh, hey, sirk. What are your friends doing? Hey, I don't know what Fee is doing, but just go with it. Great. I stand limp arm in the window. Marci, you are going to go to your old place of employment. You see she goes, wait,

wait, stop shouting, who plans through the window. I write what in the heat of my breath that's already fogged up the window because I stood so close to it. Walks out of the bar and goes, okay, if we're gonna talk about you all going to the jailhouse with a set of my keys that I gave you yesterday, maybe we should talk about that quietly not through a window.

Right, fair enough. So what's going on? yesterday, maybe we should talk about that quietly, not through a window. Right. Fair enough. So what's going on? So our plan is we're going to use the secret passage in your office in the jailhouse to get into the dungeon. But to get into the jailhouse, we thought it might be best if you could help us sneak in there. You could say that you're arresting us or that, you know, we're all your

friends and we're gonna go, you know, we're helping you pack up. We're helping you pack up. We're the movers. Right. You see, she thinks about it. She goes, yeah, I couldn't really arrest you because I'm not at that job anymore. But if we say I'm like grabbing a few things, I could maybe convince some of the more loyal guards to stand down but oh man if I get caught helping you guys they're gonna I'm so absolutely fucked more fucked than I am right now well I think that's your decision to make. Oh fuck. I've got to ask you because I mean, do you want to do something proactive or do you want to just drink your afternoon away?

The latter mostly. I mean, look, I'll do my best to help you guys. Go ahead and give me a persuasion check and that'll kind of determine how much she's willing to help you. We all do it. Let someone else do this. Oh, it actually have a plus two

because of my background. Okay. Then you. That's an eight. An eight. Okay, so she goes, listen, I don't think I should be going in there. I'm pretty high profile right now.

I'm probably the first person that Fergus would have kicked out. But I do know of a couple of garrisons around town with some pretty big shitheads that I'm pretty sure we're already in the pockets of the rooks. I can help you knock those fuckers out and you can get into the jailhouse unnoticed wearing their armor. All right. Okay.

As we're on our way, can I cast guidance on Marcy? Ooh, nice. In case she doesn't use any kind of like diplomacy. Yeah. So you guys follow Marcy at a distance and you see that she wanders over to a scout tower. It's in a less populated area that overlooks the town walls. So scouts here could presumably see a threat from far away. Doesn't seem to be heavily manned. You see one guard is outside of it, Marcy approaches and starts gesturing to him like she needs to get inside.

And after about a minute, you see the guard relents and goes and opens the door and she follows him in. Okay, we've waited the perfect amount of time, right? When the door is about to close, but they don't see us and then we scoot in. I keep the door open by shoving bookfari in. Go ahead and give me a stealth check. This is all of us, right? Yes, it's an eight for me. An eight. 14 for me. Okay, that's a 13 for me. As you guys go to like a slip into the door, one of the vials at a zirke side on his pack breaks against the stones. You see the one guard looks up and goes,

what the fuck? And goes to like pull out a pike. You see, Miles for sale. You see Marcy pulls out a cimitar. Everybody go ahead and roll initiative. Okay. Add a D8.

Ooh, 30-20. 26. I got a dirty 20 as well. I only rolled a one on my D8, but dirty 20. You guys did not get a surprise around, but you do act first. You hear a couple of guards hire up in the tower, react, and sound like they're about to start running down. You see this one down here on the bottom floor,

has gone to grab his sword. Zerk, you are first. I gesture to the broken vial and say, oh, sorry, let me clean that up. I grab it, and I throw the shards directly into the guards' eyes. And I do like the shards on fire with fire bolts. Great. Um, 13, does that hit? Uh, 13 does not hit. Oh, you see. The shards go, uh, they hit Marcy in the back instead.

Ah, fuck! Oh, sorry. You know I got a bad back, kid. Hey, same. It's basically occupant, sure. Uh, that is Henry's turn. Can we see the top of the stairs? Can I summon a shank to guard the top of the stairs? Yeah. I see your shadow turns into shank. It's just useful for once. Come on. All right. Oh, you're making

me take the stairs while you stay down here. Fuckin' typical. We can trade places if we need to. Takes a sip of his flask, salutes you, starts walking up the stairs. All right, share that thing. And then I'm going to, I'll attack the, with my halberd, the guard that we have nearby. Sweet. That's only a tend to hit.

Does not hit. This one guard heroically fights off like the work of you. Ah, stand back! Jesus, not a promising start. Fia, that's your turn. Okay, can I do a quick perception of these stairs to see how many people are up there? Yeah, go ahead and do a perception check. 18. Sounds like there's two. Okay, I'm not going to waste a spell on two cards. I'm going to try to hit this card. This is... Someone's got to be able to do it.

I could again! Yes! Yes! Holy shit! Holy shit! Wow! This is so funny because before this session I was telling everyone the dice. I was vetting.

I got three not ones in a row and I'm actually not using that dice Okay, you made the right choice a heat team for 18 plus three 20 van Jesus do you want to do lethal or not lethal damage non-leaf love course non-lethal okay sweet um you push past zirk and henry you swing. This guard has like a shield up and a long sword. Oh, can I kick the shield out of the way? Yeah, you kick the shield out of the way. You swing down with your great sword and you are able to beat this dude down into submission. He is knocked out and falls down.

Careful, he's impenetrable. Oh, okay, just whore him up like a piece of paper. As I slice him unconscious, I whisper sleep well, my beauty. What did she say? I just feel bad, okay? He's just the wrong place, the wrong time. They want to wish him a good sleep. Okay, on initiative 16, you see those two guards begin to make their way down the stairs.

Shank is up there. They are going to pull out bows and shoot at shank. What? Oh! Hahaha! That is a 15 to hit shank. Ah, he's a shadow. It'll be fine. That does not hit shank. That does not hit shank. Shank, have you AC?

Yes. Yes. Sweet. Shank, matrix dodges out of the way, gets below the arrows. These guys are scouts, they actually get two attacks. So it takes a second to second, Shank. Misses again, Shank, it's just like jumping,

using shadow powers to get out of the way, looks way cooler than Henry right now. He's way more dexterity than me. No back pain. Next one gets three. God, I rolled terrible. Two scouts completely miss Shank. Next up is Marcy.

Marcy is going to go up and take two cracks at these dudes. She has guidance as she needs it. Oh, sweet. She hits on the first attack is gonna miss no matter what in the second attack because that's an at one. She does seven damage to one of the scouts. Already looks super injured. That is back around to Zirk. Did Feef fully take out this one guard down here? Oh, yeah. Okay, great. He is sleeping. Like the beautiful Prince he is. I feel very bad about it. His face is a mask of pain

Probably a bad dream nothing to do with what I do doing. It's like a dog having a bad dream. Just wiggling on the ground Running okay. Oh before I take my turn. I'm gonna roll for my experimental elixir for today I take my turn I'm gonna roll for my experimental elixir for today Ooh that is an extra D4 to attack and saving throws for a minute sweet so I've got that ready I'm not gonna use that yet though. I think I'll probably just load a dull bolt into my crossbow I'm trying hit one of these guys on the stairs sweet There we go. That's a 23 to hit super hits There we go. That's a 23 to hit. Super hits. Hell yeah. 11 damage. You take out the scouts, knock them out. You see he collapses on the stairs. You see he collapses on the stairs and comically falls down so hard. Oh, just bangs into the wall. Slips falls forward, just like cracks his head on the stairs so hard. Raps his body around, you hear his back hit,

the stairs with a sick and crunch, as he thuds down each and every stair, and just lands in a crumbled pile at the bottom. May your dreams carry you to morning. He is dead, He is very good. I am actually pretty concerned. He's not moving, except death to be achieved. I see after a moment, he begins to do the dog

running in his sleep motion on the ground. Why do they have a dream like werewolves? That is Henry's turn. You got one scout left, sweet. I'm gonna start spinning my Halberd into like a blur, but this attack is going to originate from Shanks position because he's supposed to scout, right? Yes. Alright, make me do what the work. I love to see this in our relationship. We do yourself really.

Very healing. Yes. That is a 30-20. Hits. Yes, that is a 30 20 hits Yes, baby. That's 15 damage. Oh Nice death door still alive one eight. Oh, you know what? I'm gonna unleash incarnation So shankets to make another attack. Oh sweets That is a 16 hits and that is a 10 damage. Oh my God, so finished.

You see, once again, go to knock this dude out and he goes, non-lethal shank. Non-lethal shank. Back, evil shadow, back, back. And you see, he walks too far backwards and falls off the spiral stairs. Like, there's something shank, grab him. Oh, they need to get like a rock runner for the heat.

They're very dangerous. For a railing enemy. Fly. Come on. Fly's over the railing. Falls 30 feet. Crashes with all of his heavy armor on the ground. What a sleepy crew.

And then after a beat begins running knocked out. Thank God. We are not going to get this lucky again. The weird thing is they run with all fours, right? Anyone else is seeing this? I'm seeing this. Good, good boys. Oh no, we put them to sleep now. We are going to take their clothing.

Yeah, that one, that armor is all dented. That was a hefty fall. See, Marcy runs down the stairs, huffing and puffing, he goes, ah, okay, yeah. So if you want to grab their stuff, we can tie them up. And I can just hang out here for the day, and you guys can do whatever it is you need to do. I'll make sure they don't follow up with you.

Marcy, before we go, you said that you wish to spend the afternoon having a drink. We have interrupted this for you. Mr. Zurk, you have so many magic bottles. Do you think that you could accommodate a drink for defined detective? Oh sure. Yeah, if you give me a second, I can whip something together. For your time, my lady. Can I do a medicine check to see if I can make some alcohol?

Sweet. Yeah, we would help, but I don't think me and Shane can have anything left. Is that right, Shane? I shake my head suddenly. Yeah. Nah. But to be the sixth hot plate and how do you

are about sharing, I am thinking you have some sort of possessive tendons. We don't have any potato scams. There's nothing left. They don't even heat up good. They really only have one life. Winks, Winks at Winks at every. I'm not.

That's a 23 medicine check. I yeah, I'll say with your like magical alchemy skills, you're able to, you know, create some ale or some liquor. And you see Marcy takes it and she goes, eh, can't be any worse than the, they've got it the copper dagger, thanks, appreciate it. Sure, takes a sec. You may grow gills, but other than that,

it's gonna be very tasty. Oh, well, you'd ain't so bad. She laughs and she goes, you guys go on, these guys were mostly in the pockets of the rooks, they don't really have any allegiances either way. I'm confident I can intimidate them into not following up with you guys. So take what you need and get on your way.

Okay. Thank you, Marasi. I will look for which one has the biggest arm or for I have the biggest of the party. Which one's got the most medium breastplate, the most average size. I would actually be the one for me because I'm kind of the medium height of all of those.

I guess that's true. I guess I'm medium height in general, but of the group I am the tiny one. I mean, I never thought about it like that. You see that two of them that were like higher up in the tower, that were shooting bows, have like leather armor. They were like scouts and the one down here has like chain mail was more of like a guard. You know, you that that thing is going to wreak havoc on my lumbar. You can you can wear the chain mail. I need something a little bit lighter.

I will done it. I take the chain. I cover my eyes for the majesty of this person while I take their clothing off. Then I go up the stairs and around the corner to hide my majesty. And then I come down still with my eyes closed putting my clothing onto this person. Do you watch the steps? Watch the stairs. He's a death trap please boy. Sweet, you guys take a little time, take the armor off these guards. This episode of NADPOT has brought to you by Bird Dogs. They're a company that makes pants and shorts, so no matter where you fall and the age old battle between the two, you can rest assured that Bird Dogs has you covered. Now we all know when the legwear war begins and we're forced to choose a side, it's

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and enjoy the show. Henry and Zirk are in this leather armor, looking kind of like archers. They come with like little cloaks with roses on them. So you guys can through the hoods over your cloak. Fiya, you have the same thing. There's like a little chain male hood. A chain hood?

Chain hood. Whoa Wow And you guys Go on your way looking very much like town guards. Okay while we walk I hand the Experimental Lixer which I put into another syringe to book far And I say when the moment's right just go in on both cheeks now. All right. I'm ready to stab Mr. Henry. Sorry, I just heard something. Can you just a light prick? That's what you does not need to be a stabbing. It would be better if he doesn't know your comment. I'm being very sneaky. The muscles shouldn't be tensed. The other rising volume get good access.

So you have to surprise. Okay, yes, please do it. Please do it when I don't know. But you guys keep on talking about it very loud. So I'm kind of walking with a clench. Yeah, just as you're clenching, it's just so nerve-wracking because you're trying to make these plans,

but there's just a book, there's just a book flying behind you going, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. Please do not hum. I have a big of you. Sorry, sorry. Just trying to be ready, trying to be ready. See you guys in your town guard, Regalia.

Head to the jailhouse. You see there's a single watch tower poking over a stone wall next to a stone barracks. On the front gates are open. I mean, you see a few guards mill about or practice in the yard. Luckily, it does not look like there's a ton of people around because as you can assume, there's been this crazy shakeup

like probably some people quit or left town. The people who are loyal to Madam Whitlock are probably there or securing the transition of power, so there's not that many people. Okay. Based on, I'll say that Marcy kind of gave you guys a little bit of lay of the lands. When she told you where her office wasn't stuff,

so you see next to the barracks is the jailhouse, and are you guys just gonna approach? It does not seem like it would be weird for you guys while dressed up to be able to. Yeah, let's not break stride. And I'll do a lazy salute on my way into Sweden. I am going to very quickly before we get in. I'm going to do something that will last an hour.

I'm not going to bless us until right before we fight for a kiss, but I am going to cast a second level false life on myself to give myself a temporary hit point. Nice. Sweet. So you guys approach the jailhouse. level false life on myself to give myself a temporary hit point. Nice. Sweet. So, you guys approach the jailhouse. You open a wooden door with an iron ring that opens into a foyer leading off into a

couple rooms, presumably offices ahead of you, directly ahead of you, with iron bars, presumably leads into an area with cells And you see there is a guard at a desk here as you guys walk in go ahead and give me a Deception check I'll say just one person does it Okay, someone else do it. I'll say one person does it whoever's kind of leading the way as you guys walk in And you could do it with advantage because of the guards costumes. This check is less about you guys getting caught as like Henry, Zirk, and Fiya breaking in,

and more like does the guard at the desk think it's weird that you're walking back towards the office? Do you look inconspicuous enough? Got it. Fiya puts on her most furrowed brow. Sweet. Henry's brow is always furrowed. Yeah.

Henry, you gotta look the part the most. I think maybe you should take the lead here. Okay. I'll... Can I touch Henry and give him guidance for this check? Sweet. Yeah, nice. You put your hand on Henry's back, light glow of magic.

Wow, I rolled pretty bad, but with the guidance as 17 gonna do it. 17 is gonna do it. Nice. You all hang a left as you enter not going into like the jail area on the first floor here and instead going towards the offices. You hear more noise of guards in the jail area, but this area is pretty quiet. You follow Marcy's instructions, presumably she had told you like exactly where her office was. You find her office, you enter it, and you are instantly hit by a strong smell of meat and ale.

You see that in the short amount of time that Fergis has had this office, he's already kind of made a mess of it. You see there are scraps from like his lunch or his breakfast across the desk, as well as a few empty pints. You see papers strewn about randomly, which is in contrast to the rest of the room,

where you see bookshelves full of various case files and ledgers, a few hanging lanterns cast a warm light in here, and there's a small circular red rug in the middle of the room. Clearly the door will be under the rug. Can I very quickly look for a crust of bread that he has beaten so that in the future I as a visual health is saliva. You might be able to find one on that big tray of empty hamburgers over there. There's definitely bones from like it looks like he had like a like a hunk of meat or something. There's definitely leftover bones here so you can definitely you can definitely pocket a bone. I just pocketed as a bitch. You try to you know Gather biological debt threat us before we go down

Can I do a quick inspection to see if I see Any more information about Neble or the scale tippers or anything like that that's been forwarded to burgers here um go ahead and I will say Instead of an investigate because you know any information Marcy would have would probably just be about Nebels false identity. I'll say give me a pure luck check to see if that's what like Fergus was looking at on his table or not.

Shout out to the three crey. Ha ha. Shout out to the three crey. Shout out to the three crey. Yeah, you just see on this table is a bunch of really poorly drawn pornography. No, I passed something. Okay, I mean, I guess I respect him for making it himself. Yes, an artist really. We are going to kill this artist. A very

contract. What do you make me do? You do have to respect the, you got to respect the craft. It's a beautiful thing. Okay, so then I guess I take the rug aside. So wait, you pull the rug. You see that the floor appears to be exactly the same here. Had you not talked to Marcy, definitely wouldn't notice this, except you do see on close inspection, you see a slight difference in the wood floor tiles here. They look like slightly raised enough so that you're able to get your fingernails under it, or like a wedge,

and pull it up a little bit, and you lift it up to reveal a trap door that unveils a ladder heading down into a dark room. It's just pure darkness down there. All right. Then I guess let's go down the ladder and I can try to use my mage hand to sort of put the rug somewhat back over the store.

Sweet. I'm supposed to. You begin to go down this ladder. Use made chant to close the door behind you. It's very dark. You feel your way down this ladder. Everyone be careful. We saw what happened on stairs.

I can't imagine the iron of a ladder. This is like stairs, but worse. Nobody fall asleep right now. Finally, you feel yourself enter like the open air of the room, not open air as an outside, but like you go from this kind of claustrophobic tunnel to being in like you can feel like you're in the cell, reach the floor, you are in a room that is pitch black, presumably the cell, but you hear talking outside of the room and the sounds

of movement. You hear the sounds of like chains moving as well as like the shuffling of plate mail and several guards or nights. Guys go ahead and give me perception checks. Oh man. Oh boy. Oh, baby. Oh, baby. That's gonna be a 22. Why, damn, I thought I was fucking cool with a 21. I got a 19 on the fucking die. This die has rolled two now, 20s and a 19. Okay, that's very good.

Gentlemen's nine for me. So first off, you can't make heads or tails of like which direction you're facing. It's incredibly dark in here. Fia with dark vision, you're able to see like where the door is and kind of concentrate your attention there. Thick would door the rest of the room is stone.

I am a hunter in dark woods. This is comfortable for me. And you hear a voice go, come on now, get the chains on him. We got a long trip ahead of us. And you- This is Betty Jack, isn't it? And you hear Sahu Soastian go,

where are you taking me? I haven't had shrimp in a day! You monsters! Oh my god, they're not feeding him shrimp! Hold me back! Hold me back! Do we hear or smell footerguest down here? You do not hear furguis, but you do hear down here. You do not hear Fergus, but you do hear Petty Jack and a couple of his dudes. It does not sound like I will say with that good of a perception check. Doesn't sound like he's got like 12 or 13 people down here. It sounds like there's like, you know, maybe half a dozen people

down here. And it sounds like they're dragging the Baron out of these out of the dungeons here. the Baron out of the Dungeons here. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I'm sorry my ex wife. My ex wife's third cousin. It's just every day. It's a new revelation with you. Trust me, I would love to talk all night about it. I'm an open book. The little leak of your biography is synth-lating. No, if we can get out of this mess, as soon as we're on that riverboat, we're just having a big share circle.

I'm ready to wax. I am ready to wax. We will take turns in the shared chair. Okay, we are going to save your cousin. Okay, I'm going to summon Shank also. I will go ahead and cast Bless on us. Sweet cast Bless. Are you guys keeping your, I'll say that you guys kind of hung out and listen to for

a little bit. Do you want to revert to your normal armor and stuff or do you want to be wearing this like leather stuff like the stuff that the scouts are wearing? I don't know. It's no different for me mechanically. Okay. Yeah. I think it's the same for me. Okay. I have chain mail so I think I'm gonna I'm gonna. I'm gonna. Okay. Henry. Henry goes back to wearing his normal armor. So should we try and pretend like we're... I don't know if that'll work. Why don't we. So should we try and pretend like we're, I don't know if that'll work.

Why don't we just try to sneak out and see if we can get a surprise round? Okay, okay, let's do it. You guys go up to this door, pull it out. I can make hand the key on the outside. Use Marcy's keys to open it. Everybody give me stealth checks as you sneak out into the hall.

Oh my come on. Please. Fuck me. That's in that one. Oh. Oh. Well, everyone added D4. Okay. But what did you get, Zirk, because I'm deciding whether or not to

chronal shift for Henry? Okay. I got a three as well. Oh, sorry. You guys are talking. Yeah. I also rolled the one with the whatever blessing. Oh, I didn't even have that. Yeah, that's a nine total for me.

Here's what I'm gonna say happened. Okay, I'm not going to waste two Colonel ships then we still have further gifts to fight. I don't even think what's... Yeah, I don't even know if you can do two Colonel ships like that. Maybe you can, but it's not about I do to save them. I'm gonna say with a matte one, what happens is you guys open the door and you see Petty Jack and two of

the Petty Kings Knights along with two rook goons are dragging the Baron. The Baron isn't chains. Looks like beat up and all dirty and everything. You see torches, lights, the tunnel and as you guys sneak out ever so carefully Henry is in his normal clothes has his has his hood up as you guys they're stealthy the barren turns and sees he goes cousin you're here to save me oh fuck oh this is so No, what is this? Here. Don't know this guy. I do not know this man. All right, folks and gentle ones, it is on.

You see, Petty Jack and his knights and two of the goons draw their swords. Everybody go ahead and roll initiative. All right. Add your D8. D8. Ooh, another dirty 20 for me. 11 plus 4 plus 5 18 25

Holy shit. Oh my god. Yeah, you guys got that You are good with the LACRATY. Uh-huh. Zyck is already halfway up the ladder again. Okay He's starting to dash back. So you guys see it so the Baron has outed you guys Quickly get me to a horse get me to a horse cousin. We need to dance It's been hours it's an hours It's too long I know I just feel like I feel like almost we should leave you in here so that you know what to value in that It's burst into tears but you know what to value in that. It's just burst into tears.

Petty Jack and these guys go for, some of them go for like pikes, the nights go for pikes, and the goons go for like clubs. Petty Jack pulls out the shitty sword. You guys gave him, I'll say just like long sword, and looks at you, Fian goes, oh I see you got my sword, do you?

No, you had someone else's sword and I'm bringing it back to them. I hate that right. All my stuff with somebody else's stuff at one point. Yeah, I kind of get that sort of vibe from you. You know, I thought I'm actually a big thrifter, so same to be... Oh, the same is that it just... Yeah, I love it. Yeah, I stay sales, do you want to go to a is that it? Yeah, I love it. Yeah, I love it.

Yeah, I love it. I love it. I love it. Zerke, you act first. You guys were, we're not able to get the jump on them, but are faster than them. Okay, I think Zerke sees them approaching, grabs a potato skin from Henry. Let's squish the oil from it into his palm. No!

Shanks, screams, collapses. Just trust me on this. And then uses magic to infuse it and cast grease all over the floor where the guards in. Pennyjack or standing. Sweet. What do they have to do with deck saving throw, right? Or is that just what they do? Yes, it is a 10 foot square centered on a point within range.

Turns into difficult terrain for the duration. Each creature standing in its area must succeed on a deck starity saving throw or fall prone. Sweet, they're all going to do deck saves. Peti Jack passes. You see him just slipping. Oh, Petty Jack slips on the round We're in during yourself Next one of the goons saves God, I'm so sorry. I just rolled a 14 a 15 to 15

Three saves. Okay, you're allowed to roll out to okay the two nights fall There we go. And the bear and falls. Ah, no! This was precise, we had those points. Don't worry, so as to it. It's basically like ice skating. I'm sure you like that too. I do.

Oh, via that's your turn. You've got two nights that are down on the ground here That are down on the ground and how many are in this if I had let's say a 15 foot cone how many are Here you would hit everyone, but you would also hit so ashton Is he on the outskirts could I yeah? He's like up against the wall kind of you could aim it So I can hit everyone but him if I aim it correctly. I'll say you'll miss one of the guys. I'll say there's like one guy with like, that's like up there with swastio.

Okay, I have to go for it for people amazing. I'm going to use a second level burning hands. Okay. Each creature in a 15 foot cone must make a dexterity saving throw. A creature takes three, 46 part of me because I'm doing it at a second level. Fire damage on a failed save or half as much on a successful one the fire

Ignites any flammable objects in the area that aren't being worn or carried and I'm assuming that grease would light up sure sweet I'm going to go ahead and Roll for petty Jack Yeah. Heady Jack gets a 17. Oh, slip flat around, slip flat around. Does a split as the fire goes around him. One of the goons here fails, and then the two knights

are gonna roll with disadvantage. They both fail. You see, Fia creates this fiery hand. It almost looks like her mage hand, but on fire, slaps the ground you see the grease ignites and I'm gonna say yeah you see the capes of these two knights catch on fire so anyone who fails takes takes 18 anyone who saves takes nine and then I think the greed the grease maybe is on fire or something

I don't know yeah, I'll say I'll say that the grease is on fire that they'll have to move out of it or I'll say they'll take a D6 of damage every turn they spend they spend in the grease So you see fire like a dangerous kitchen now you see fire erupts in this little tunnel instantly like black smoke everyone's really bad You see fire going all around the barren save me go save me One second one second the one goon who got burned looks like a little hurts the nights look messed up They're like capes are catching on fire and they're screaming Penny Jack is just like penny Jack is just like sliding around dodging, dodging all the fire. Oh, this is fun!

It's kind of like, it's kind of like dressage in its own way, cousin. Watch and enjoy that. It's hot! I would like to say also that my, all of the flames that Fiamakes, they have a feather a feathery quality to them like the, like the plumage of a firebird. I don't say this lightly but that that potato skin did not go to waste. We all have to make sacrifice. You see, um, Shank goes to attack you Henry. Shank, you know the truth. Henry, that is your turn.

Nice. Alright, um, I'm gonna start spinning my, spinning my hell bird, uh, but then I'm gonna start spinning my, spinning my halberd, but then I'm gonna holster it and say, book far, stick me. Just, you see, just been like hiding in the shadows out of nowhere, comes and stabs you in the neck. Oh, he said the buttocks, sorry, but he said the sh- Sorry, I can't see it's dark, I don't have dark vision. Are you okay, sir? Look, Potter maybe was going for the actual cheeks, the face cheeks. Yes, the face and cheeks. Stats immediately. That's really cute. I did have, I had the ass pretty clenched, so I think this was a good move. Uh, yeah, and he goes right into your neck. Um, and you feel, uh, the bone claws growing out of your hands erupt from between your fingers, twinge of pain, but also kind of a rush of adrenaline. You feel the bone claws growing out of your hands, erupt from between your fingers, twinge of pain, but also kind of a rush of adrenaline.

You feel pretty good. Am I starting to like it? I am going to mentally command Shank to appear as a shadow behind the knights. And then I'm going to, who is the most hurt? One of these. The two knights that are on the ground are pretty hurt I will say that to get to petty jack you have to like brave the fire I'll say the nights are kind of on the edge that you could Attack them and be on the edge of the grease

Okay, sweet then I'm gonna I'm gonna swing it one of these nights with my bone fists great Then I'm gonna I'm gonna swing it one of these nights with my bone fists great That is it was so close to in that 20 and then it tipped on the other direction It's an 18 but 18 damn 18 does hit all right 10 damage Jesus This dude just lived a nightmare out of nowhere somebody started yelling cousin and then all of a sudden the whole room let on fire He fell down caught on fire and then a man with bone claws came out of nowhere, it stabbed him.

Henry go ahead and finish this dude. Okay, I swing my fist so the claw ends, like just before the bridge of his nose. And I stop but then shank hits him from the other side and I get like a bone fist bump. Oh my goodness, that's cool. Just explosion of brains, as fire rains all around, do you know what pay jack goes, this is fucking insane man. You guys see this, you guys see what's going on. Stop enjoying the kill, Jerry, that's not. Sweet, that is the Goons turn is going to start his turn by taking a D6 of fire damage in the grease.

Get's up from prone, is gonna get out of the grease and go after Henry, because he's up there. Cool, I think, and if this guy is walking towards me, he's gonna get an opportunity attack from Shank. Sweet, Shank, go ahead and take a crack at this dude who's like about to swing a club at you. Cool. Shank crit.

Shank crit. Shank crit, good God. Shank? Oh, I love it when a shadow crits on an opportunity attack. God damn. How do you want? Is that 18 damage from Shank Jesus Christ. Um, Shank finishes, dude. Wow. You really got Shank, huh? So as as this dude is like walking towards me, Shank is like shadow boxing, just like shuffling his feet around kind of distracting him, and then Shank just really, really, really slowly puts the bone cloth through the small of his back

and out of his chest. Ew, ew, ew, just reaches through with shadowy claws stabs through this dude. This guy drops the other goon who was with a swastion, is gonna just kind of kick swastion over, swastion's still in the fire cousin

uh... it's hot it's like being too close to a fireplace that's it's it's it's it's it's precisely it's crazy it's like that it's not even a matter of the thing that is in the fireplace is out everywhere cousin it's quite literal it's everywhere the fireplace stuff whatever they call it. The fire.

That's why the fireplace is the place of the fire. This is a fireplace practically. Amazing to last it this long. This one goon who was not knocked over. But I probably think to a D6 of fire. He will take a D6 of fire damage because he's up in the mix. The greasy fire. Only takes one damage of the greasy fire.

Is going to move out of the grease and go after. I hope none of these guards have flour on them. And go after Henry. Actually, he'll go after Shank. You just saw Shank kill two dudes. That's right. Shank is the threat. That is 13 to hit.

Misses. Good God. I can't hit for shit. 16 to hit. That hits. Okay. Mrs. Good God. I can't hit for shit 16 to hit that hits okay Shanks that eight damage no He only has shank has one hit point Swings Swings swings a base through shanks head You see shank dissipates it just looks like this dude attacked a shadow a petty Jack goes

What the fuck should you do that man? Wow Taking a shadow Stop guys sliding me I saw I'm just like, he's sliding. Oh, cruise. Like, let's be never seen this happen. So, like, I'm taunting this guy, but also being like, Henry is Shank OK.

Shank OK. Shank's good. Shank's good. Don't worry. OK. So, it's how that lives on a hearty diet of potato skins and onion rings. He's going to be fine.

I need to, man. That's all I need. Enough of the color commentary. All right. That is actually Petty Jack's turn. Petty Jack is going to take a D6 of damage. That's all I Enough of the color commentary That is actually petty jack Stern petty jack is gonna take a D6 of damage just takes the one damage Oh, I got to like the fire. It's toasty. It's got that fire place stuff Against Malay or flesh burning. Um, he is going to go an energy drink announcer Also sounds kind of like earnest Yeah, Jim Barney He's an... It also sounds kind of like earnest. Vern?

Jim Varnie. Yeah, Jim Varnie. Petty Jack is going to get out of this crazy grease fire, and then is going to... You see, he ducks and weaves around Henry and goes, Oh, I see where the real fight is. It's her! She's stealing swords. Uh, it goes up, uh, uh, in swings at Fia.

You made my cool sword back. Never. Do you know who you stole this from? Did you steal this from? It was against. It was against. Yeah, it wasn't it. I thought this was. Yeah. Keep him talking, Fia. 15 ahead.

15 misses! Uh, takes a second swing. Damn, natural three misses, misses big time. I'd like to say that I used the blade to reflect the light of the fire to get in his eye and make a miss. Ah, that's great! That's awesome. It seems as though the sword has chosen a new owner.

What? Swords get you's honors. This look crazy. It seems as though the sword has chosen a new owner. What? Swords get you, Zodders. This is fucking crazy! See, this is why if you treat objects like objects, then you will never make a connection. Henry looks at his hot plate. Oh my god.

Why did you bring that? He's not wait for Henry to attune himself to the hot plate. Just an entire episode of a ritual attunement Wait for Henry to attune himself to the hot plate An entire episode of a ritual attunement of Do you make a George Foreman grill to a dungeon man? That is The night's turn there's one left Going to get up from prone Take some damage from the fire. He is on Death's door already going to just like an actual nightmare

Just on fought cape is on fire gets up without even getting out of the fire nose is just like death throws Are gonna take some swings with this pike on on Henry Good god, I can't roll for shit today that's a fucking eight to hit misses not not the two net fours of throwing this dice away usually went on the dm usually went on the dm I like it when I roll low but this is just this is too much I haven't hit you. I have some good rolls over there. This guard just wraps himself in his fiery cloak and is screaming That is the barren's turn the barren I'm gonna say is gonna need to make a dexterity check to

Get up because he's like chained up first off start of his turn. He takes fire damage He takes four fire damage. He does not like that, he's not super strong. He's gonna make a dexterity check to try to be able to like stand up and even use like a quarter of his movement to hop. Ooh, thank God, thank God he took all those escape artist classes, he gets a 15 on an acrobatics check. You see he slithers himself up and begins hopping. You see he's able to hop out of the fire

and then sort of stop drops in rolls like near you guys in the chains. Fire safety is one of my passions. I have so many. That is back up to Zirk. All right, so gonna get a quick survey of who's left. So you've got one goon that killed Shank, super self-conscious about the fact that he attacked a shadow. You've got Pennyjack going after Fia, and then you have one night who's just

on fire and screaming at the transplant. I'll take you to fucking hell with me, man. I didn't teach you this one in night school, huh? Are you sure you're not all ready in hell? I guess we're to the fire. That's fucking hilarious man, tell him! I don't wanna like Betty Jack. Betty Jack, could we stop having a good rapport? I'm supposed to be mad at you.

Why? It's just business man. I just wish we were watching you get into high jinks and like go to jail and like chase get chased around by a troll and not try to kill us. That would be like so much better. That's kind of like the gun going to die. Yeah, it sucks. We all get hired on different sides, man.

That's just life, isn't it? It's life crazy. He's got to take a minute and smell the roses, you know? Yeah, I'm going to try and... I guess we'll try and attack Petty Jack just to keep the his back. Sweet. Ugh, that's a nine, that's gonna miss. That does not hit.

Petty Jack hops definitely out of the way. Ah, little two on one action. Damn, he's fun to watch. Alright! You're a real cut-up, sir. Thank you! I'm so glad that you just were given this blade so I can still like you a little more. Alright! You're a real cut-up, sir. Thank you! I'm so glad that you just were given this blade, so I can still like you a little more.

That is your turn, Fiya. Okay. I'm going to green flame blade onto Petty Jack. Zrees! That's it. Two, shut out to the two crew, but let me see. Two, two crew. Okay, eleven.

Ooh, you swing Petty Jack Bloxy, goes like, ah, you're good, but you're not that good. You need a little more time with it, huh? Okay, I think I'm going to have to use Vaughn of my, I have to say some stuff for this fight with the further guest, because I'm getting so fucked up. But, or because I'm using up everything,

but I am going to use one of my war priests to bonus attack. Great, nice. And that's a nat one. Oh god. Yeah, he sufficiently rattles you, and you swing the blade and are not able to hit. Henry, that is your turn. I'm gonna summon, I'm gonna resummon Shank, and I'm gonna summon him as absolutely as close to the goon as I possibly can.

Okay, so Shank sort of just like grows in front of his face. I told you he was here! Look everybody, the shadow guys back! Hey, you're crazy man, I don't know what's wrong with you. This is not okay! And then I'm gonna take my attack, which is going to originate from Shank. Great.

I don't know if I'm gonna be able to hit. I have this blessed thing, right? Yes. Oh, all right, then I might hit. So that's 14. 14 already hits. This dude's just in like letter armor. That is nine damage.

This dude does not like that that but is still hanging on. That is this goons turn, this goon goes, okay I'm gonna attack the real guy now but not because I care what you guys think about me swinging at shadows but more just as a strategic plan on my own behalf. Nobody cares about you, we like your funny boss. That's right, Pety Jack! I started to think I missed you because I kind of like you. 20 to hit Henry, clubs you for five damage, that hurts. And then takes a second attack, 16 to hit Henry.

That also hits. Ooh, baby. 8 damage. That is Petty Jack's turn. Petty Jack is going to take some swings at FIA. Hey, I like you too! I hope you like me enough to miss, like I did with you. It hits with the 23 to hit.

I'm not going to use shield because I only have one first level spell lift and I have temporary heat points Only only five damage on the first attack Second attack misses you're able to get the crescent blade up again. Yeah, let me do a concentration check Hit I make it great. Yeah, that is the last night's turn. He is still on fire Just let yourself burn, man. Four damage, still alive. It's just so much in save him!

What? No! He's gonna make an attack on Henry, trying to take him to hell with him. Absolutely hits with a 23 to hit. Okay. Stabs you with a burning pike. I understand why you're screaming now holy shit Lemon damage Henry, okay That is the baron's turn the baron Is his jackals is just going to

Trip like try to do a weird escape artist thing. The key is to just unhinge all of your joints. Huh! Oh, I got a cold head into an acrobatics trick. Wow, I heard that. Yeah, you hear a horrible pop in his shoulders. Ah! I guess he only shrimp,

so he definitely does not have strong bones. That is back up. Actually only the dales. That is back up to Zerk's turn. I drew my attention back to Petty Jack, grab a little bit of the greasy potato fire and put it on a crossbow bolt and I get ready to attack the Jack. Holy shit, they got just touched fire that's fucking insane man. Oh, oh, oh, oh, uh, sweet. That's in at 20! What? Yes. We all crit, baby.

Rich, with this fire bolt, go ahead and roll your damage. That is 2D10s. Let me do it. Oh, wow. That could be really good. That would really bad. Yeah, it could be 2. Could technically be 2.

It's 2-2. No! Oh, no. Poor damage. The 2-2 crew indeed. Damn. Oh, my God. Poor damage. The two two crew indeed. Damn it. Oh, the two two crew, the two two crew. Good lord.

The two two have two two to come save the day. You see, yeah, you shoot this, this crossbow bolt, this flaming crossbow bolt. The air just like puts it out. It stops me claiming. It just hits a pennyjack in a super meaty part of his thigh, it's like, ah, gotta hurt I guess. I guess the universe is a fan of you, I don't understand what's happening. Ow shit man.

There was too much potato on the tip of that arrow. Have you considered lucky jack instead of petty jack, it's kind of more complementary? My life mostly is so gas. So recently, fear that you're turned. We're happy we could turn it around again. Thanks so much. Okay, I really can't be using too many more abilities. I have to say for further guess,

so I'm just going to attack six plus three is nine plus five, 14. Betty Jack, it's just like does a weird back bend. It just has like really, it just, it's like clearly double jointed. You see like his kneecap stay put, but his bowl body moves back. Ah! We all look sad. That's what the Baron was trying to do.

We all look sad the sword and she says, okay, I understand this. This is not a referendum on my ability to wield the blade. This is because Patilda is still alive. And so you are still loyal to her. I understand. I understand. You broke my friend. Hey, why are you talking to your sword?

Henry, that's your turn. You call that my sword. That's my sword, Jen. Henry is, I'm gonna ask Shank to Shank's way over to over to the Baron and See if they can tinker and see if Shank can tinker with The Baron's change. Shank is gonna get opportunity attacked by the by the brute that's going after you Oh, wow, he's probably gonna discipline. Let's let's see if it works. Let's see. Okay. I can always call him back Only a 12 misses all right whips. I wasn't swinging at a shadow

You absolutely if I was who's because I wanted to and that's my shadow you're messing with I'm just gonna try to punch that guy 16 to hit yes 12 damage super hurt still alive. Look that is that goons turn that goon is going to swing at you with his club 14 hit misses right 13 hit misses right misses twice that is petty jacks turn petty jack goes fuck I had it months! Ha ha ha ha! Well, you were imprisoned before this, got it? Yeah, that's true, I'm actually not having that much fun! Uh, 17 to hit you, Fia.

Why am I happy for you? Uh, six damage, Fia. Okay, you have chewed through my temporary hit points. My necromanthic facsimile. Well, these are temporary hit points. That's not good for old Benny Jack! Oh, never mind. I still have one Well, you're magical aint it

Nine to hit misses on the second attack That is this I just crit on my concentration check shit nice Your concentrating really hard you gotta take a shit or something Yes, I wish I could concentrate this hard on the heating you You got to take a shit or something. Yes, I wish I could concentrate this harder down the heating you. Wow. The last night that is just a fireball at this point,

literally, is that 1HP cannot possibly live. You see, he's just like, cape wrapped around him. He just disappears in fire. The cape is almost like a cot in the cape. He's like rolled up in a carpet. I wish I could say you fought bravely. There would be potato skins waiting for you in referee. At initiative three, that is the Baron.

I'll say the Baron needs to get, I'll say Shanks over by him now. He'll have advantage trying to get out of these shackles. With the acrobatics check, I'll say he has to get a nat 20 to get himself out. He's safe, he's just like, you know, he of these shackles. With the acrobatics check, I'll say he has to get a nat 20 to get himself out. He's safe, he's just like, you know, he's in shackles. Does not get a nat 20, gets a six and a four, you hear more popping.

Oh, oh, oh, oh. I think you have many skills, but in escape artists, he's not one. Sweet, Zirk, that is your turn. You've got this one goon swinging on Henry and the Petty Jack. Yeah, I'm gonna see if I can take out this goon. Okay, Zirk needs to feel better about himself. He's okay, Zirk.

I've missed three times with my new blade. That's what I like to call a Zirke 20. Ooh. Ooh, okay. Yeah, that's kind of like a crit. Yeah. That's actually two crits, this one. Ooh, there we go, that's actually two crits is what There we go, that's 11 damage holy shit. Zerk finishes dude Zerk

Pours a little more fire onto this crossbow bolt is like please don't go out. Please don't go out And I think I like way over compensate and absolutely obliterate this guy Just catch him on fire him on fire. Yeah, he's like the other guy. You see it hit some just like ball of flame and just disappears. He goes down. You see Henry on your turn, Penny Jack goes, well, I give up. Yeah, I don't want it.

I don't want it. Yeah, if I can bring up one, no thanks. Absolutely no fucking thanks. You don't get to just give up. What? Really? No, I think we're dead. You don't get to just give up really he's no, I think let him We can give up if you leave Wait, let's at least let's at least fucking ask him some shit wait, Patty Jack. Where are you going? You can only leave if you tell me who gifted this sword to you. That's what it

That's what's up this sword that you have conceded to me because you even called it mining at that Yeah, cheers. Yeah, whatever you want look you're gonna kill me. You didn't kill me. I consider us acquaintances at this point Sprite all the state chill Sprite all I am learning so many levels of friendship a This state is chill, spryle. I am learning so many levels of friendship, acquaintance, companion. Body for now. Can we roast each other?

Are we at that level? Yeah, we can roast each other. Hey, you roasted a couple of my friends, huh? Ha-ha-ha! Oh, holy shit. Yeah, no. That is dark. I like that.

That was fucked up. Now tell me who you get my blade from. Right. Yeah, you see after a moment, my reach is blade. The fires die down. You guys take a moment, get the Baron out of a shackles. And you guys kind of like have your sword held up to Petty Jack.

Petty Jack is yielded, throwing his sword down. Just kind of has his hands up and he goes, all right. So I've been in the dungeon, in Heronford, you guys know Heronford. Heronford. Heronford is where the Petty King, Thurston Bright Leaps Castle is, that's sort of like the capital of Outerboro,

and he goes, they got a couple of X-plates there who turned and now they love the Reaper. They think the Reaper's great. Do you know why? names, okay? I know one, there's a sorceress named Maksara, there was a high-non-other profit. There are a couple people. I don't know all their names, okay? I know one, there's a sorceress named Maksara. There's one dude named Prophet Gideon. There's one dude named Prophet Kane. And Prophet Kane had some swords from some like, X-plates who were like dead or ran away or something.

And one of the emphasis on the ran away. Emphasis on the ran away. Seconder, seconder dead or ran away or something and one of the ampuses on the ran away and second option the second I'm a ran away who's like that one? Definitely, yeah, definitely ran away. Did your friend fight like me and just kind of give up whatever things went wrong? No. I am, I choose in this moment to believe that Petildas played was stolen from her while she

take a shit much like I still from you. This is what I choose to leave. And anyone who says otherwise can shut their stupid mouth. I completely agree. I couldn't agree more. Listen, I got no love for these guys, okay? They just, they got me out of the dungeon. They said, hey, we're looking for these people. If anybody was hiding out, the bedfellows would probably know about it. Go out to your contacts. So I sent notes out to everybody I know, an outer burrow, everybody I know in the capital,

everybody I know in Interboro. They found this guy, Penley, I guess, because Madam Whitlock responded to one of my notes, said that she recognized him, so they sent Profit C Kane here to fuck with it Prophet Kane Who else were you looking for who else has a little notice like the one that you sent out for this man at the matam Wheatlock found I'll remember a few of the ones that we're looking for an out of burrow. There was

You hear this name. He says this name, Glada Gourley. That's a beautiful name. Braden Kenley. And then you hear, he goes, somebody who just goes by Batilda. Batilda. So she's Vante, so she can't be dead. I don't know.

Did you ever hear back from anyone who saw Batilda? I haven't heard back. No, first off, nobody tells me anything. I send the messages out and then they go back to Aaron for nobody tells Petty Jack shit. My job was to send the notice out, then I was supposed to come here and I was supposed to get the baron so that they couldn't make a martyr out of them or something, so that we could just bring them to the Capitol and pay them off and get them a house somewhere or something. So you're basically like a glorified mailman?

Yeah! Yeah! It's kind of like a telephone three of criminal activity. Right! Okay, well this gives me great hope to know that the betilda is undervanted, least it means that she's wanted and she's not already dead and someone stole her sort of all she was taking a sheet. That's right, yeah.

She did take a long sheet. She's not dead, she's just in a lot of trouble. So huge, yeah. Huge upgrade. This is good, this is good information. And you see Petty Jack scratches his head and he goes, oh yeah there was one more. One more. There was a girl named... Arena Avenov. What the fuck? What the actual fuck? Fia, you're trembling.

Arena? Is that... name means something to you, Fia? Arena was my girlhood best friend. You see, I book fire pipes up and he goes, she... She helped him bring me to life. Arena first... made bookfar.

But we got into a situation that... we are both safer for not being together, perhaps. She doesn't seem too safe, consider what happened to Bentley, huh? Yes, okay, Petty safe considering what happened to Bentley, huh? Yes, okay, Peddi Jaikaya said to myself, if the trickster keeps her safe, I will not try to find her, but the trickster is not keeping her safe. Okay, there's a lot to unpack here. So much. Okay, look, Arena aside, where's Fergus? Hey, watch your mouth, huh?

I didn't mean anything, but I'm just trying to... Put Arena in a corner. No, but... Hey, look, I don't even anything right I'm just trying to put arena in a quarter. Hey look I don't even know who this arena person is I'm just I want to help. This is fair I'm sorry Mr. Henry I am very distracted. We just got to prioritize so we can get it all done okay. Every single piece of it. Prioritize this is very good advice. All right well uh dancing your question Fergus is off you know grabbing one of those, you know, grabbing one of those horrors so they can do one of those fancy reaper execution things. It's-

Excuse me? What? Like, read the scale? Uh, you see, uh, he nods, and he goes like, yeah, with the scale, you know, they take the horror, they put in the pit, they put the person on the scale, they say. Who's the idea of us this whose idea with it I think maybe madam with like got it from the crown She said she wanted to do like display a strength to kind of kick things off

She's she's got some like underling or something who's gotten too big for their riches trying to cause trouble But she's got a few guys on the inside telling her their every every move she said she's gonna make an example of them oh no you guys suddenly hear a faraway sound you are deep in the dungeons here but the jail above is a big echoey building and the sound is so loud it kind of reverberates in the earth. You hear the sound of a bell toll. And that's where we'll end our session. I used to love the sound of bells. You ruined bells for us, man. I will be haunted by a bell choir this holiday season.

Sweet guys, thank you all so much for listening. You can head on over to our Patreon to hear us talk about the show patreon.com slash ad pod that's n-a-d-d-d-p-o-d. We are. Come over and listen to Emily just being shook to shake it to the floor right now. I get it. I don't even know. She's haunted. Oh my goodness. Wow. Yeah. Does anybody have anything to plug? I will. I will once again plug our PO box. We have had such a wonderful outpouring of gifts for folks. If you would like to send us things, you can do it by going to 1920 Hillhurst Avenue, number

222, Los Feliz, California at 90027. And here's a few samplings of things we've received. Kelly G sent us a deeply touching note and some wonderful word art featuring quotes from campaign one. The Lydia Stormborn one really got me. It was tearing up all over again reading it. So thank you very much Kelly. Thank you.

Abby E the gnome ranger sent us custom face masks she made. So thank you very much. We will wear them with pride He's safe. Yes Brian C sent us some fun postcards and again another slew of save the dates from Patrick and Maggie of Farmsville VA Catherine and Dylan of Mobile, Alabama And then finally we got a note from Ryan C who sent us a copy of the Warded Man one of their favorite books Thank you very much.

We can't wait to read it. Thank you so much. All right, those are our shout outs. Thanks again, folks. It's a real pleasure and a treat. Sweet, thank you all so much for listening. You could follow us on Twitter at C. It's Mirf is Me.

I call this called the All Addy Extra Demole and add Chaker with his Jake. And you can tweet about the show using hashtag, madpod.net, that's NADD-d-d-p-o-d. And now it is time to thank our benevolent counsel of elders. Brad D. Jeffree S. Halder Frostback, Steelbreaker, and Matt M. Guards at the other garrison across town, they were actually all playing strip poker, and their uniforms were in a huge pile by the door.

Also they had just brewed up a bunch of healing potions, regardless I think Marcy made the right call there. Jordan D.J. Cutter W. Jive G. Zolo Dolo, and Dylan B, prisoners in the dungeon who watched the fight with Petty Jack go down, they thought about using the grease fire as an opportunity to escape, but were too enchanted with Petty Jack's hilarious riffs that they all just state put. Shubart the Mushroom, Danielle, the Dastardly Dame, Andrew M, Beardman Dan, and Scott D, members of Thorn Kirk, Food and Drug Administration, they are currently

hard at work creating an ad campaign to dissuade people from using experimental drugs to give each other sick ass bone claws. Ah, no fair. Danny P. Alainacy, Michael Mick D. the head mixologist, Victor T. Balnor's boy, marathon runners who have sworn vengeance upon Fia after she accidentally entered the race and beat them to the finish line While on her way to run errands dang Fia can haul ass Andrew B. Justin I T.J. M. the gnome barbarian Elena M. Traile the cray-fay and Jared E a crew of adventurers who live in the abandoned In the abandoned model rail on the other side of town turns out Thorn Kirk is home to a lot of failed transit models.

There's even a hyperloop for some reason. Wow, that's fun. Christopher B. Austin-Bohnsaw, MR. Damial R. Cyborg version of Josh the Cold, Cobald, and Octo-Lick. Chiropractor who have attempted to fix Henry's backs, they have tried everything but in all fairness, most of them were scared off pretty quick by a shank begging them for potato skins. That's, you know, that's actually fair. Gage M. Skokila, Destiny Sea, Richard X Machina, Michael L. and Kelvin Nudel's horror hunters

who due to a clerical error worship a being known as the Richter. Little is known about the Richter other than the fact that if you call him Richard he will totally flip out. Now that's a god that I want to worship. Sir Joe Salazar Salamon Sakurai as they siss you want to, trust the traveler, Jory Azdenaji, Caleb L. and Ryan, the elder morning council of do- of do- of do- of do- of midwives who have universally condemned book far and books delivering babies in general. Okay, okay. Jack L. Flawless Whale, Temporal, Sam L. Nicholas C. and Reese and S. The writers of Bedtime Rhymes, a children's book full of adorable schoolhouse rhymes that cast incredibly powerful and dangerous played witch magic.

There is already a class action lawsuit against them. I can see that going not great for those guys. Samuel B. Mike H. Matthew E. Colton B. And Adam G. Detective Marcy's Drinking Buddies. Yeah, oh, they love getting drunk with Marcy because three beers in Marcy will spill the beans on any crime, pending arrest or not. Wow, actually that does sound kind of fun. Mateo C. Eric B. Panema James, Adrian Halfling Bart and John H.N. the inventors of warm saucers, hot plates for cowards. They can't boil water, but they also can't start a fire if you leave them plugged in. You know just a nice little alooquorming dish.

Sounds fine to me. Dan M. Nikki W. Grace G. Drew Nasty and C.C. Lulu, Spritell's bosses, who have been hounding him to get his number of fairy contracts up this year. He thought he had the jackpot with the Choo Choo crew, but they are getting more clever and Spritell just got a letter that Drew Nasty wants to see him in their office. Uh oh. You're in trouble. J.A. Barnes and, you're in trouble. Jay Barnes and Adler Douglas A Michelle O and Luke H the entrepreneurs who started cigars from afar. El de Moran's best and only cigar club via is signed up under four different names. Dang, that is quadruple

the cigars. And I applaud that effort. Ritterin Timmy R Lucas B Aaron S Kevin M an intricate network of organized crime contacts that is released from the dungeons every year, not to distribute wanted posters, but to deliver holiday greetings. They're essentially carolers, but heavily armed and pretty sadistic. Yeah, that's scary. That is scary stuff. Austin C, hogfish is above average hog.

What? New York, Steven C. and KJ. So, Astjan's Honor Guard. The only nights who are experts in dressage. Chefs of scampi and Somalia's of port. Oh my gosh, honor me with your guard, please. Michael Mayer, Rahul N. Mike K.

Max Will C. And Nick L. The guards on duty at Thorncurk Jailhouse who let the Choo Choo crew slip by, some of them did it as a subtle act of rebellion while others were simply too wrapped up watching the Mighty Ducks 2 on a rolling TV cart. That's a great film, it Raccoon, Nick W. and Michael C., Potato Skin, Pyromancers, who practice the way of the flaming wedge. Excuse me, not the flamingo wedge, that's a different art form. Each slice of arcane cheddar is bubbling hot, each bit of magic bacon is covered in boil

increase, and the only thing that can save you is a cool dollop of divine sour cream. Don't forget my chives and my scallions baby! Robert F.S. May M. Spartagnus, Nathan Kazmir, the all-knowing Big Bad Beardow, the Mad, the Petty King's Petty Friends. These spoiled royals have a reality show on eldermore and tv called the real house maidens of heronford. They throw at least one glass of mead on each other per episode. I cannot wait to tune in. Eric McD, Jack Meehaw, Per Berlite, Axel A, Nero Claudius, Cesar Augustus, Germannicus, and Christian A, the crit on your homework,

twerkers, a traveling educational dance crew who has been banned from putting on school assemblies because of, you know, because of all the twerking as it were. J. Dragonborn, Cody B. Jonathan O. The Sandrayan, Ben A. and Fel, Dennis, a bunch of paladins who worked for a guy named Al who is taken to calling them his aledons. Unfortunately, the name has stuck. Yeah, I know I'm in love with it.

Dave H. Catherine S. David K. Christian S. Keith K. and Brittany B. A crew of Faye Tufts who beat the shit out of you with hammers if you ever break a friend's for life packed. These bloodthirsty monsters really value friendship And I hope never to meet them. Kyle H Emilio D Frankie Koala Big Bad John, Aston S and Blair, the bug Blair Bar Blairian. They also take their aggression out on pieces of paper like Fia, but Big Bad John has actually made confetti out of a laminated menu. Can you even imagine? Pork Chop, Sheniel M, Argent, Alice, Minette F and Pat L, the doomed Knights mentors. They trained

these knights for many a scenario, but totally forgot to host a flaming dungeon simulation, which turned out to be a ginormous blind spot. Yeah, it was all dragon fire, not grease fire. You know, what are you gonna do? Lauren H. Matthew J. L. Janina E. Maddy Y. And the eldest Barry. Chefs that the Baron has already enlisted to quote, Cook me the largest bowl of scampy the world has ever seen.

Altale exoskeleton as it were. End quote. Now that he's out of the dungeon, I guess the Baron d'Intense to make up for lost time. Ryan S, the bone duster, Joshua H, Robert, Chrisp, Yeadraisal, and Big Bad Mac. A lot of big bads out there, huh? Petty Jack's biggest fans. It doesn't matter how many crimes the guy commits, his personality is electric and his hot

takes are dynamite. Petty Jack makes friends everywhere he goes even if he's trying to murder them. Brentley C. D. Mar B. Micah B. Carly and Clarke of the Thunderfuck's and Jorge C. Fergus's deputies who were looking forward to wreaking havoc on Thorneker but so far have only been given menial tasks like making burger runs and ensuring that Fergus's beer mugs are frozen, which actually I take issue with that's a very important task. That's top priority for old Jake here. Conor Savage, B-Chef, Russell H. Christopher J.O.

Cole the Goldfish, Gremlin, Logan S. Champion Dage writers, whims of Swashkin, absolutely warships. The only thing that kept him alive in those dungeons was the vision of Christopher J.O. tap dancing on their steed. Absolutely iconic. Benjamin SK, Leviathan, DMA, Bioquart 7, Remington CD, and Mike R. Humidor salespeople whose entire business model is based around selling an annual mega humidor to FIA.

In fact, one of FIA's train cars is just entirely a freaking humidor that Lephi then hocked last year. So good on you. And of course, thank you all. That was a Hitgun Podcast.