Not Another D&D Podcast - Ep. 71: The Gladeholm Wizard Tournament (Mage Madness with Zac Oyama)

Episode Date: August 2, 2019

Zac Oyama (Dimension 20 / CollegeHumor) joins the Band of Boobs in the Gladeholm Wizard Tournament! Hardwon tries desperately to impress a new party member, Moonshine bonds with her dirty daddy, and Beverly has an unfortunate incident with a rival wizard. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.Music/Sound Effects include:"Crackling Fire" by sagetyrtle at Freesound.org."Club chatter, London" by mlteenie at Freesound.org."Dreamy Ambience" by Klankbeeld at Freesound.org."Techno Pop" by Frankum at Freesound.org."Small Forest Stream" by CraftCrest at Freesound.org."Sad Song" by at maerkunst at Freesound.org."Moonshine's Stump" by Emily Axford."Lucanus Aer'Tea" by Emily Axford."The Thinking Cap" by Emily Axford."Quiksus" by Emily Axford."A Wizard Tournament" by Emily Axford."The University" by Emily Axford."Star Spawn" by Emily Axford."The Whisperwood" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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PAPA at checkout. That's www.atamineave.com. This is an exclusive offer specific to the podcast, so be sure to use the code PAPA to get your discount 100% free shipping and get it fast with brush processing. Code P-A-W-P-A-W. Goodbye, Sweeties. Welcome to the campaign after the campaign. This is not another D&D podcast. Welcome back to Bahumia, everyone. Bahumia.

I'm your dungeon master, Brian Murphy, joined by Jake Herwitz. Part of Elf, short ear. Oh. A new one. I love it. New body, new intro. C plus, baby. You know what?

I'm giving you a B minus on that one. Whoa. Well, that'll bring the old average up. We're moving up in the world. We have Emily Axford. Munchan Sabin-er-Dia. Whoa! That's great. I'm gonna hype it.

I'm gonna embrace my dirty daddy. A truly dirty surname. And then of course, called Old Tanner. Beverly Togo of the Fifth. In a bit of a rough patch in my relationship, but that's okay, because I found a book that lets me kill my dad. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Fun day. Everything's coming up, Beverly. I was about to say the same thing. And guys, this week we have a very special guest. Please welcome to the podcast, Zach O'Yama. Thank you. Thank you.

Yeah. There you go. Oh, beautiful. You can't say your character name because we don't know who you are yet. Yeah, we'll never. We will never, we'll never meet you. And thank you for coming, Zach. Thank you.

I'm just here to watch. I play a dwarf from the frigid north. We will never interact with their characters. I kept telling him that's not where they were going and he wouldn't listen. I keep walking north. They're south. They're so south. Stop walking towards the north. I keep telling you you can't play Ned Stark and we're not in the frigid north. All right guys, let's do a little recap. So last week we had a thick, soad baby after a post-fight

celebration with Lydia that saw hard one become a total mama's boy. You jumped through the Plainar Gate and returned to the material plane landing in Hillhome once there, moonshine cast reincarnation on hard one, turning him into a half-health and curing his vampirism. Together you headed into Hillhome where you caught Red's airship just as he was about to fly off to iron deep with a guane and Irland Bev confessed to Irland that he had kissed another boy in the Feywild. Irland was obviously upset and

Beverland's future seemed up in the air as Irland flew off. It's on the rocks. It's literally up in the air. Oh, hello You all headed to the mayor's house where you overheard Moonshine's parents arguing Moonshine kicked in the air. Oh, hello. You all headed to the mayor's house where you overheard Moonshine's parents arguing. Moonshine kicked in the door and shouted, hey, mom and dad. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Then confronted Mima about her parentage while Erdan

pulled her father aside. His name, of course, is headmaster Lucanus Ertia. Ertia. Ertia. Ertia. Mima told you a little bit more about Munchan's father that he had convinced the high elves to join the last war and it had resulted in many of their young high elves dying because of that his reputation has taken a hit and he's hesitant to use his influence again. Mima also filled you in on the impending war.

The Allah has taken over the eastern half of the continent. Iron D has suffered heavy losses from the Shadowfell attack, and Gladehome is currently doing nothing. Moonshine left to confront her dad, but ended up having a nice little night with him. His high-elf snobbery was outweighed by his shock and joy at finding out that he had a child. Lucon has told you that he'd like to help,

but that Gladeh home had its own problems. In just three days' time, it's holding a tournament amongst mages from all across Bohemia. The tourney is held once every hundred years to compete for a magical artifact called the Noah. YAH! No, thank you.

The thanking cap. Just call the thanking cap. To compete for the thinking cap, without open war amongst the wizard gills, Lucana spheres that the grave robbers will be participating. Meanwhile, Bev had a heart to heart with his mom who told him that Bev's dad had visited her in a dream and said to tell Bev that everything

would be all right in the end, as long as he does what needs to be done. Following his instructions, Bev went out to a pond to find something that was left to him by his father after digging near an old oak tree. He found a chest containing a book, a beech-gary of devils and arch devils by the Paladin, Beverly Togold the first inside it, Bev learned that his father had bequeathed to him a blueprint to defeat him and acrots devils. And that's where we are now.

So I've been reading all night. So you're just sitting by the pond, reading through this book. You see that your great, great grandfather has apparently fought a great number of foes from the Nine Hells, as well as many anti-paladins. There's various information about their styles of fighting, their immunities, et cetera, after a bit, you probably head back to your grandma's house

because it's getting late. Moonshine, you were with your dad, do you want to meet up with these guys to go to bed for the night? What are you doing for the night? I think I'll send a little messenger, little animal messenger to my folk. Yeah, pop, pop, pop, pop. I'll put on your postal service outfit. I gotta call them messages. He does that with joy. And I think I wanna send,

I wanna send a message to hard one in Beverly and let them know that I'm in the tent, the mansion that looks like a tent. Sweet. Hard one, you and Balnor are just crushing Martha Toe Gold's sticky buns inside the house. He's cool. I just can't get enough of these bad boys.

You gotta go to it at time. You gotta go to it at time, Balor. I'm gonna get some more cold cuts. You want another sandwich? Oh, yeah, I could use a couple slices, baby. Bev shows up soaking wet. Just like it has just started raining outside. He enters, he's got a chest under his arm and he looks crotch. It's the newly singler, single bachelor boy.

Hey, what's up, bud? Hey, just doing some light reading. Just any more of that ham over there? No more ham, I closed the? Uh, no more ham. I closed the drawer with the ham in it. You get, there's some, there's some turkey left, I think. No turkey either. Oh, wow.

So are you like rice crackers or anything? There is a rice cracker. I can see it. We didn't eat those. The other goes over to like, uh, his dad's all easy chair and just nibbles on a rice cracker. Oh, I take some pity. I bring the boy a little ham.

Ha ha ha. You look like you could use some meat. Thank, that's the nicest thing someone said to me all day. Nana kind of leaves slaps your hand. Are you lying to him about the ham? Oh, God, I brought the ham over. I'm bringing the ham over. Tell him that's about the ham.

We'll finish try out. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Bringing a ham over town times about to ham move fresh trout Thanks Nana oh no, I wish I came so I could play with Nana kindly and suddenly you hear Scratching outside the door That's got to be probably a post badger or something Go to the door, okay, you open the door and Papa is there wearing a moment's outfit. I guess they're short staff tonight. The pop-up post. He hands you a letter written to you by moonshine that says at tint, near more. All right, let's read this together.

Everyone, same time. Why don't you read it out loud and I'll read in my head. I'll read along with you. This is a good chance to learn a little more about prepositions and how to use them and how not to use them. Equally valuable skills. I'll just talk directly to the possum. Pop-off. What's what?

Riyou, he starts doing charades and just points off towards the mayor's house. Moonshines, near the mayor's house. Riyou, she's in trouble. Riyou, she's in trouble. Riyou, she's good. Nods. Okay.

Riyou, got all that? All right, do I tip him? Riyou, he looks like he had in the hand that I would die. He got was up the ham so fast that he bites your finger a little bit. I have eaten a lot of animals myself. I deserve that. He scrambles off back towards moonshine. Okay. And moonshine, Lucanus shows you to a little guest room in his little magnificent mansion.

Okay, yeah, I mean, I think- I wasn't expecting any guests. Is this good? Oh, and overstaying my well-goat. Did I misread some signs? I'm elated to have you, I've. Okay, great, yeah. Oh, I've always dreamed of perhaps one day

getting to have a child, sort of come home and then I have to really quick clean up a room or something. I do have some laundry if you're alluding to that. I would like to do your laundry. Erdan will do our laundry. He is. I'll love it.

Yeah, let's put Erdan to work. In fact, I'm gonna make some dirty clothes. Erdan just said that. Is Erdan just a teaching assistant? Erdan's just is low status friend. Yeah, well, you know, I only need to trance. So if you want to kind of like hang out like, you know, turn the lights out But to have some of those like late-night conversations or whatever get deep or whatever. I think that would be wonderful. Okay Sweet, so you guys start trancing

Mm-hmm. Everybody in Sweet, so you guys start trancing. Mm-hmm everybody in Grandma to Gold's house. Do I trans now that I'm a half off? No, you go to bed cool. You sleep. Same old, same old You try to trans it honest and probably fall asleep Time it is time for me to trans as as my people do just in really hours I transfer eight hours on the couch. I can't wait to tell Mochai now fucking epic my trans was I think I trans through times as long as you've ever trans you sweat through the bed Drilling and covered in ham on the sweaty trance

So you guys all go to bed night Night here is in stark contrast to Shadowfell. It's so peaceful, you can hear the crickets chirping outside your window, you're up with the sunrise, the next morning, and you see, you poke your head out the window, you go out the front door, you see that the halflings are already back to work. You see animals are back out in the fields grazing, a bunch of stout, hearty, halfling volunteers are helping patch up the homes of people whose

property was damaged by the monster attack. In Munchine, you've finished Transing. It's the morning. Okay. I have a question. Is today the day of the tourney? You see Lucana shakes his head. No, it's not for another two days. Oh, okay, cool. Well, I'm gonna go and list my team. Very good, yes, I will gather the high elves and get our mounts and we'll be ready to go in just a little while. Oh, you got a mount, tell me about that mount.

Well, it is a magic monowarm. And it my no. He holds up his hand. You see this translucent blue Drake starts floating in the air and he hops up onto it. It does it look cool. It looks like he just like keeps rickering. It's like it's a grand creature. Yeah, he's pretty good. All right, cool. Well, I guess I don't know, I guess I'll see you later.

I feel like I lost you with the... No, you didn't. You didn't. You didn't. You're so different than me, and I really appreciate it, but sometimes it throws me for a loop. Right, yes, of course. All right, well, I'll talk to my people.

You talk to yours. Yeah, I guess how we gonna, my people, you talk to yours. Yeah, I guess how we gonna, when we gotta see each other again. I mean, we're going to a glade home together, right? Okay, so I guess I'll see you in glade home. I assume we would travel together. Oh, oh sweet.

Dude, do you not, oh, do you want me to just kind of go ahead? No, I just, you know, I think we're both walking on eggshells because we are defining a new relationship. Right. I was just trying to give you your space and I know what your intentions were. But I'm just gonna go get my people and then we'll come meet you.

Right on, right on. Right on. All right. I hear some of the kids at school say, right on. Honestly, sure, I'm into it right on all right All right, go back I run My man who he arm says goodbye I'm at the door Which I'm sorry. I'm I'm I'm knocking on the door at Beverly's grandma's house super sweaty

I you guys open up the door and you see Munchain'm knocking on the door at Beverly's grandma's house super sweaty. Hi, you guys open up the door and you see Munchain there outside on the porch. Munchain! Hey! Um, okay, I know everyone's got a lot going on, but do you all want to enter a tournament with me? A wizard tournament. Did you say tournament? Did you say wizards? I said both those words, yeah. that seems like a real good palette cleanser Okay, it is actually that sounds very frivolous. It is actually for the sake of a

Magical sacred object that we need to keep out of the wrong hands So like we also it's fun, but like also we got Owen or the I dropped to the ground and started doing pushups as soon as she said, tournament. So I missed all that, but I'm in. Okay, great, great. I passed out some jerseys. Ooh, wow, you made it.

It's a team thing. It's a team thing. I need scissors quickly, Beverly. This absolutely needs to be a crop top. Oh, second drawer. Second drawer in the kitchen. Yes, Sam. Yes.

I'll help you. I'll help you. Martha Toeold comes over, grabs some scissors, starts cutting the sleeves off your jersey. I'll give it a little bit of an edge. A little, yeah. Right, oh, okay, you want it to kind of like hang. A little bit of fun. You can see your abs a little bit on the side.

We're gonna take it just above the belly button. Right, there it is. Ha ha ha. Oh, Martha Togel. Hello. Mochain. Hey. I tried my best to bring him back to you. Oh, um, she burst into tears. Oh god. I burst into tears, dude. Oh, ah, she hugs you. Oh, I've known about it for close to a week now, but it's but it hasn't gotten any easier.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. He was upset. What are you crying? Are you crying about what I think you're crying about? No. Yes, Beth. Don't lie anymore. We don't lie anymore.

I can't see. Hands are too much. Hands are too much. I'm an exterminator. I like the fourth, too. It comes over, founders are trying. Man, we'll just start shoving our mouths with ham, using the ham to wipe over. Found her. Oh, man. We'll just start shoving our mouths with ham using the ham to wipe off our tears.

That's just salty. So moonshine, did you really give your dad a real talk into? Did you like kick his ass and then sleep in his house? I bet you did. You really gave him what for, huh? Yeah. In fact, he didn't want me to do this tournament and I said well do bag I'm gonna do it anyways. We're traveling there with him and he rides on a really really weird looking thing

Okay I'm outside of here excel see or Why do you hear Excelsior? And if you look outside and you're just riding this weird blue ghost to where I could not you can be dirty. I can't see that. Trust me, he's dirty, okay? He's dirty. I believe it.

Anyways, yeah. All right. Yeah, so I mean, I don't know what y'all need to pack up for your affairs, but it was a little presumptuous for him to just be straight outside, but we're kind of ready to go, so whatever y'all need to do. Okay. I don't know if I'm springing this on you.

Well, you know, if it's the fate of the world, then I guess that's kind of where we're at now, huh? All right. Yeah, I'll be down in five. I've run upstairs, pack bag call my mom and come back Wait, don't you need me to scribe? Can I borrow the scribe daggers? I use Rosalene and you Use scry on one of Rosalene's sister swords the dagger that you gave to the widow

And you see she accepts the scrye, she doesn't try to do wisdom saving throw or anything. You see she gives like a thumbs up kind of just around vaguely, not knowing what you are. And she looks to be talking to some of the monsters that are in that forge, like listening to their complaints. It's just really hot here. Okay, I think we could I mean it's a forge so it's gonna have to be but it's like I don't know in here to kind of if that makes sense. He's doing a fucking downhaul. Ammerable.

Panda Greeds, you gotta learn from this woman. Why would she talk to them when she could just kill them? I don't get it Panda greens the most sustainable change comes from cooperation not domination Go ahead and give me a persuasion Never wanted that 16 Panda greens waste for a long beat Or truck for a really interesting theory People people didn't really they screwed me, but they didn't like me

Yeah, exactly you weren't you weren't able to set up a legacy just you could rule But you couldn't you know sustain that ruling you know what? I'm ready to come out of the drum. Not a pistol, I'm back. Um, so Martha Togel goes, uh, walks over to the bed and goes, um, so I guess you'll have to be going. Yeah, but hopefully not for as long this time. Um, I give her the scrying dagger that moonshine gave to me. Oh

Yeah, yeah stab somebody if they come into the house Scrying dagger you don't know anything technology I love us to spy on her mom's lower away. I like collect calls. We're doing you do you will get billed for it? I will I will pay collect. You call me, whatever you need, Bev, I would love to have a way to contact you. I'm always so worried about you. I said, gone. The band of boobs call to their moms now, okay.

We're turning over a new leaf. Hey, Boundar, get that scrim dagger I gave you. Okay. Papa, run this over to me, Mom. Yes, I'm in a world jealous. Yes, I'm in a world jealous. We call our moms. Papa, Prussia, sc scrambles out the door.

Fuck yeah. Once a session from now on, we call our gosh dang moms. You see Martha Togo, uh, gives you a hug and a kiss. Now remember to scry, okay? Okay, I'm trying to scry once a week. Okay, I, you should scry every day. All right, I'll scry. You should really scry every day. It's okay I'll describe it. You should really describe every day.

It's okay. There's a war coming, see under the world and stuff. Try to describe once a week. I'll try to describe once a week. I'll try to describe more than that, Mom. I love you. I love you. It gives you a kiss.

Yeah. I don't tell her about the book. Okay, cool. That totally makes sense. She doesn't need to know about the book. Right on. Cool. So you guys go outside. You leave this little hobbit hole and you see a bunch of the elves are gathered kind of getting ready to leave

You see Lucanis is speaking to Mima It's tense because they haven't gotten a chance really she never told them about Moon Giant right so right they're having that kind of a kind of terse conversation. It was my right to know. Like that kind of thing. No, it's not like a galley one or anything like that. It's just them kind of being awkward. But you see after a little bit, Mima motions over to some cricks and you see some of the older Druids from the old folk circle starts taking people to the roads to like the northeast out of town

There's a couple roads that lead into Hillhum and Mima sees you guys and waves and Runs over me my like the jerseys were competing in the thorny. Oh those are those are can I get one? Yeah, I have one. I had a couple of extra made up. I'll knock them up. I didn't know if there might be a merch opportunity. She takes in, puts it on, and you hear Lou Conniss

yell in the background, if she gets one, shouldn't I have one? I mean, she's having it on the team. You're right, yeah, you, I'm on the team. I've raised her. You're damn right, I'm on the team. And yeah, Mima takes a Jersey She throws it on and she goes You're your father told me about what's going on. I think if if you're able to help out the

Hylves, I think he'll come around and I think they'll be able to help you too Yeah, I mean honestly, I've been working my magic. So I think I'll be able to, you know, I think I'll be able to be persuasive in the future. We're gonna know each other. It's honestly pretty awkward so far, but. Yes, he is a good man, but a lot of the high elves just be careful in Glade Home. They're really judgy and snobby, a lot of the high elves just be careful in Gladehome, they're really judgy and snobby, a lot of them,

and he's under pressure from them, and then he brings that into the whole thing, and he acts like it's not his fault, but he's over there. I see you gesturing, are you talking about me? You're yelling from the background. No, no, it's all good. It's all good, Dad. Yeah, I mean, I already have my, I've had my

guard up with high elves for a while, so I think even having it slightly lowered, it's still there. But I appreciate you looking out for me. Right. Well, I'm going to take a bunch of our warriors here. I'm going to send them up to Iron Deep along with Aguain and Irland and all them. Did that patreon? Patreon, you're warrior now? Yeah, I got a club. I got a stick that I swing. It's like a bat.

God for you. I used to hit people for fun, but now I do it for good. I mean, my where's all Cobb? Oh, so Cobb was up in Glade Home, but we sent a couple animal messengers up to them and we told them to send some more back up to Iron Deep. I think if the others coming through them mountains

from the east, they're gonna hit Iron Deep first and Iron Deep's already hurting. Okay, all right, cool, cool. So y'all be your business in Glade Home and then we should find a way to talk. Well, I got your... Oh cool, cool. So you'll be a business in Glade Home, and then we should find a way to talk. Well, I got your, oh yeah, yeah. I got your dagger. Pop-up, I just kind of showed up and started screaming at me

with a knife. Strange, is usually so eloquent. Yeah, yeah, no, it's a scry dagger. So I can scry on you, and we can kind of have a little communication. Oh, that's so nice. Yeah, I figured that's fun. You know, life has us in many different places

and it's a nice way to connect. Right, well, I'm gonna turn to a bird and fly ahead. As one does, I'm not gonna do the same myself but I'm a pregnant elk. Yeah, you know, you gotta be pregnant when you wild shape. A B P. So I'm gonna go ahead and I'm gonna start me with higher ups and iron deep and find out what's going on.

Okay. Love you, young and gives you a kiss. Love you, young and gives you guys all kisses. My best mom. My best mom, mom. You might see her up in a glade home. She's out there with the crick-ales. I would love to bend the knee again.

To my queen. Well, you got a new knee to bend. Yeah, I sure do. You have a new body to pledge in service. And I'll pledge this one as well. Tell my dying breath, which I'm sure to take. Mima waves goodbye to you guys. Then turns into an eagle that's just stuffed full of eggs.

Can I see if my dad is checking her out? He's pretending to talk to some other high elves. You can't tell if he's checking out Mima or if he's just kind of like trying to see if anyone's talking about him or anything. All right, okay. Just looking for any sign that he's dirty. Oh, we know he is. Deep down in there. There's one of that confirmation though. Yeah, I'm keeping an eye out for it. So you see, Luconis is over with a bunch of these high elves. There are mages and archers and

some fighters with like dual short swords and a couple of them have like great swords. with like dual short swords and a couple of them have like great swords. Their armor and robes are a combination of red and black and silver, same colors that Luconis has. And you see a bunch of them have like mounted elks and stuff, just all very prim and proper. And Luconis is on his weird man of worm. And he goes, Excel C-R, we're off. You know, moonshine, I think maybe your dad is dirty but in like a very specific high-elf kind of way. Yeah, right?

Yeah. It's like so, he's like so clean, he's dirty. Yeah, oh yeah, that's the way to look at it. Yeah. Squeaky dirty. I'll tell you what, I don't wanna make a bad impression so moonshine. I'm just gonna follow your lead here. Okay, I don't want to make a bad impression. So, moonshan, I'm just going to follow your lead here.

Okay, I turn to a pregnant elk. I said, let's do this, dad. I hop on the pregnant elk. I want to summon a dirty worm. Oh,ez. Oh yeah. There's like this spectral green and brown worm that has mushrooms growing off of it. Woo!

Damn! You see Luconus looks at it and goes, uh, fine beast young man. Thank you. It's a dirty worm. Yes. And it goes a fine beast, young man. Thank you. It's a dirty worm. Yes. I kind of like scratch under its ear and it just barfs up mushrooms.

Oh, it's sick. Actually, no, those are edible. Oh, moonshine, are you pregnant? And am I going to be a grandfather? No. Oh, oh, Mallora, don't going to be a grandfather? No. Oh, oh, Malora, don't start with that. What? No.

I just think maybe we could find you nice suitable high-elf and we could join houses. What? What? Oh, I see the political incentive, but I don't know. I don't know. I guess introduce me to some people. I'll keep an open mind.

I will do that. I've been engaged a couple times before and it hasn't worked out. Hey man, sister. I've seen her bring someone to the edge just from making out. Hard one surefoot. Pleasure to meet you, sir.

He just fully looks away from you. We should be off. She guys spend the day traveling out of Hill home to get to Glade home. You ride alongside Elven Rangers mounted on Majestic Elks. Some of the mages are levitating and Munchin's dad is riding his weird man-a-worm, wriggling through the air yet. I've been riding that show. And I call him more of it into a dragon. Yeah, you turn it into a Drake that looks more realistic

and he goes, oh, I liked it when it wringled. I like it. It's soothing, I get it. It's Beverly Togled, by the way. Yes, we met when my daughter kicked in. Well, I'm sorry I didn't introduce her. Well. Yes, we met when my daughter kicked in the... Well, I'm sorry I didn't introduce her. Well, no, we all met when you kicked in the door and said that you were my daughter.

Oh, right. And you tackled the young gentleman who was staying at the house. Oh, yeah. Nice to meet under better pretenses. Yes. Well, I'm sorry, I've been distracted. I've been thinking about getting to this tourney, that's all.

Very good. So you guys leave behind the grassy plains as more and more trees begin to pop up. You enter a forest and as you get closer to Glade Home, the entire area becomes more magical. It's beautiful, but in a much different way than the Crick and Hill Home. The Crick and Hill Home are both very natural and green, but here it's almost like the Earth itself is infused with magic. The trees go from having normal bark to being this crystalline white as you enter the whisper wood. The leaves are purples and bright oranges and blues. These unnatural, but beautiful bright colors.

You see the wind blow the leaf off a branch and then it disappears into a sparkle of arcane energy and then another leaf just grows and replaces it. As the road winds towards Glade Home, a river eventually joins it full of purple sparkling water and you guys follow it. You have entered an area called the Whisper Wood. It's gonna take you about a day to travel through here

because your traveling party is a bit fatigued from rushing to hill home, rushing their mounts to hill home. So you stop and rest for the night, then continue the next day until in the distance you can finally see Glade Home. And as you approach the city, let me go ahead and give you a little history of Glade Home. It's been a long time since we've done one of these. Yeah, let's do it. Glade Home is the oldest city in Bahumia, founded by the High Elves. Its home to the famed University of Arcane Arts and Sciences, where virtually all of the most powerful mages of Bahumia have studied, including heroes like the Wizard of Lannis and villains like the Necromancer Ilsaid.

The University Castle is the oldest building in the city. It originally housed the Royal Family, who in recent generations donated the building to the university and moved to a smaller, sleeker castle. The location of the city itself is a triumph of magic. Located on the western coast of Bohemia, Gladehome is essentially a floating island, though the city connects to the magical whisper wood. There is no natural structure holding it there it merely levitates. The floating island of Gladehome has had many locations across Bohomia and has even teleported

to the Feywild. Most of the populace and the nobles in particular are Lerie of outsiders, Gladehome is home to some of the most powerful and dangerous magic in the world. Should it get into the wrong hands? It could mean the end of the elves and the end of Bohemia as a whole. So as you guys are following this river and getting closer to Gladehome, Lucana has been kind of filling you in a little bit on the tournaments and he starts explaining a little more and he goes, so just to let you know, none of you can actually be one of the champions.

There needs to be a wizard, a warlock, or a sorcerer in your party. Why the hell did we make these jerseys? No, no, no. You're still on the team. I want to stand down. You're still on the team. Okay. The idea behind the competition is that a wizard is only as good

as they are in the context of an adventuring party. So you would be warders to a wizard. You'd basically be their protectors. So you will be on a team with a wizard. There can actually only be three waters and he gives a long look at Balnor. Balnor just goes, wow. Alright, I guess I'll have to be the one to tell him. Hard one. I guess you're just gonna sit this one out, huh? Balnor, I'm gonna put you in the bag. Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Fine, I'll take the day off, you see,

just take somebody heavy out of the bag and cracks it. Prepare for anything, Valnor. That's a big walk me down. That's why we love you. But anyway, I have someone in mind who you could possibly team up with. There aren't many wizards that we know we can trust what with the recent betrayals of the Elven Grey robbers.

But there is one person that, as much as it pains for me to say, I know for a fact, they're not smart enough to betray us. So, so long as you keep them in line, I think the world might not end. And Erdan goes, that was very positive. Yes. So not smart enough to betray us, and not popular enough to have a team formed of their own already. You know what, it is unfair of me to say that he's not smart. He's unmotivated if that makes sense. You know, okay, I'm gonna throw this out there.

I think that the high elves have perhaps underestimated some folk in the past. So, I'm personally looking forward to meeting this person. I think that a high-elf estimation is not always the most objective. You see, he thinks about it for a second. Suppose that's possible, and then rides in silence for 10 minutes. Let's continue towards the city. I'd probably morph it back into that. We're at worm.

We're at wriggling worm. Perhaps you were right. I'm able to think a little bit more clearly. So you guys keep following this magic river until you can see the magical gates of Glade Home in the distance. It's almost what you'd imagine having to look like, the pearly gates. The walls are this pristine white with gold. You see that there are giant slits spaced out evenly across the walls. So you can see through, but it seems like more of an aesthetic choice. There appears to be

some kind of arcane energy that still makes the wall strong there. You see a bird fly into it and just kind of deflect off and then fly back in the other direction. Ergant, a bird. Oh, you see he rides off. What are you doing, Ergdan? Get over here. Do you have our laundry? Oh, yes, of course. I'm good at spring. I'm good at bringing back the dead and bringing dirty clothes back to being bright white. And he holds up your overalls and they've never looked clean. Wow. I'm immediately good at dirtying them. Oh, oh don't please don't do that. That's better And as the walls of Glade Home come to site you begin to hear the sounds of young ins playing you hear

splashes In the river up ahead and Lucana's goes oh god. They're in the water again They're in the magic river again and as you travel closer you begin to see The Crick Elves are living out in the water again, they're in the magic river again. And as you travel closer, you begin to see the Crick Elves are living out in the forest here. Yeah. They've only been here for a little while, but you see that the magic forest has been very accommodating to them.

Any trees or branches that have been chopped down to build structures grow right back. So you see they've quickly been able to build these little tree houses and rope swings from tree to tree. And you do see a bunch of youngins lighting branches on fire and swinging them at each other. Um, this is, someone's gonna die.

We need to stop that. He else, he else out. Stop that. Fuck you man. It's, wow, no. Mr. Ebtier, you have to trust me on this. You cannot reason with the young ins. You can put them in a sack, but they kinda just like that even more than you buy her.

That's true, that's true. I take out a travel time out sack. And I say, go round them up! What? Round them up? Round them up, put them in a sack! Put children in a bag! Don't worry, they're just gonna neck in there But children in the bag so they can make out with each other. What is wrong with you? Hey dad, that's what they did raise me and I think I turned out all right

You're right Hands hands the bag to some guards put those children in this bag right now my daughter commands it Yes, I am. Command suggests. I mean, I see it now. It takes the bag and a couple of guards run off into the woods and chase down these youngins. And you guys see the Purple River does join a moat at the gate

and there are a bunch of Crick Alves swimming in there. And amongst them is Kooter who is lounging on a giant floating leaf, drinking an ale. And he's laying there lounging, sitting next to a tiefling who's chilling with him in the moat. Zach, would you like to describe your character? Zach! Yeah, so my character's Mavros. He's a teafling, uh, sorcerer. He's wearing these like crimson robes that have this like gold inlay on him

that almost looks like, um, like a shitty tribal tattoo. Oh, I'm a, on a robe. Uh, and he's just like lounging on a leaf. Uh, you know, he's got like, he, I think he looks like, um, basically like Keanu Reeves, but with like, uh, he's got like kinda like sweat back hair, but also like the horns also kind of do that as well. He's got like a big slick back horns.

Yeah, he's like back horns. And then he has like a this like a big like black staff that's got like this weird kind of crystal on the end of it that looks kind of menacing. And he's just hanging out on a leaf. Hey, you see, cool. Stop fucking slashing me, dude. What? I thought we were having fun, man. Hey, can I use your horn to open this beer? Yeah. I better. Max, the beer open with a horn. Hey, thanks, man.

Do you got another one? Yeah, dude. Hey, it's yours, dude. As long as you let me keep using that horn, of course, dude. That's good party. As as you let me keep using that horn of course, dude Asking party as you appear You see as you guys begin getting close to the city walls Lucanus looks in the water and goes what everyone get out get out right now you get out I he looks up and he sees Maveris, and he goes, I named you, champion of Glade Home, and you're treating our ancient moat like a lazy river, get out, get out of there.

Okay, fine, whatever. Just like, scoot over, like using my staff as a model. You're magic, I know you can do it faster than that. I don't want to, fine, just scoot along with, you're magic. I know you can do it faster than that. I don't want to, fine. Just screwed a log with some kind of magic. I can't trip or something, but he's Ray Afros and just skid a class with my guys. And Abris appears next to you guys.

Valor get this man a beer, another one. Yeah. He doesn't need any more beer, look on his horse. Hey, dad. Yes. You're kind of being like a little bit of a wet blanket in front of my friends. The tournament is in a day young lady.

You can't be drinking. I'm taking a drink down from my mouth. Huh? Yeah, Luchon. Hey, what's up, Luchon? I could have thrown you over here. Hey, Kudder, who's this guy? Saw it, it's.

This is Maveris, he's pretty cool. He just comes out and he hangs out with the crit-gale sometimes. You were supposed to be studying, but, I mean, what? Steadying what? I'm a sorcerer. I don't, they call me Maveris the unschooled. They say that to make fun of you, Maveris. I'm trying to motivate you here, okay?

You have great power and great potential, but you don't Go to class. Yeah, I know cuz class sucks. I get in there and I read it like half a page and I'm fall asleep Everyone in there is this like real type A nerd that just looks like all over their studies They're wizards. Yeah a a bunch of fucking nerds. You know, Munchan, you're dead and tell us this dude was awesome. I know. What did I tell you about Hyle, vestimation of other people?

I hate Lukonis. Lukonis goes, Erdan, talk to him for a minute, and Erdan goes over and kind of takes Mavericks aside. And Lukonis turns and he goes, I'm really sorry to stick you with this guy gang. What? You mean Erdan? It's fine, I don't feel stuff. No, Erdan's a hoot.

I'm talking about Mavericks. He's not. What do you mean? Sorry, he's no, you're right. You mean I'm sorry, Dan. I'm sorry, Dan. I'm sorry, Dan. I lost all the time.

It's okay. Erdan is hilarious. And this kid seems like a real deadbeat. I'm a studious half-elf myself. It's very good. I think I can whip his lazy ass into shape. And hell, if he doesn't want to be a wizard, I'll do it. Hey, it would be an honor to teach you.

Put his hand on your shoulder. I'm out the bed to teach me to read Do it fast Everything's like so conflicted because maveris is so cool, but reading is also cool and like these just two Dueling thoughts are just battling in his head and he's not sure how to land on it two dueling thoughts are just battling in his head and he's not sure how to land on it. I like Mavericks, I'm amped about him. I don't consider it a burden, I consider it a blessing. Bring him on. He wings at you, that's the right attitude.

Mavericks is like halfway back to the crib with a big leaf. No, no, hey, do not, please do not go back in the water. What's going on? He's, he kinda yells to the guards. And he goes, why is no one doing anything about this? Yo, you got any more leaves? The guards do not have leaves. They're not part of this.

We get you a leaf right now. We all find leaves and we all go. All right, no one got it. You got a wax to leave. Yeah, I'm waxing. No one needs to, all right, if you're going to use a leaf, you don't need to wax the leaf. Listen, I would like to take you all a little tour of the castle

before the tournament begins. I'm trying to stand on a leaf in the river. I'm wakeboarding with a leaf. Please don't. Lucana grabs you guys all like a rowdy children. grabs your arms, pulls you out of the river commands his guards to do it maveris this is moonshine sivan the pride of glade home my daughter moonshine

air tl I should say ertia moonshine cyber-air-tl moonshine cyber-air-tl moonshine cyber-air-tl moonshine cyber-air-tl I'm confused, do you need to keep saying it? We're gonna work on the first name, we're gonna come up with something fancier Some personal kinks were ironing out Sick, nice to meet you This is Beverly Togolds

And hard one short- foot. They will be your Worders. Oh sick. Oh, okay. Yes awesome. Yeah, we're gonna go in that tourney with you. Oh, here's a Jersey Oh hell yeah say the word and I can make this a crop top no word man I hack it The jerseys are necessary but it especially the necessarily to turn them into crop tops. You ever played a team in a rec sport that had jerseys and you didn't? It's so intimidating. I can assure you no one else will have jerseys.

Look at him. We're going to be the ones intimidating, everyone. Yeah, we're going to look like a team. We're going to look like a unit. Yeah. Mavericks, what do you want your jerseys to say? Um, well, I think my nickname here is the unschooled, just because like insults.

Do you want me to hate? Can I be the unschoolable? Unschooled, yes, yes. I mean, to be honest, I kind of have some problems with the other students, where they, yeah, they try to make fun of me, or they try to like, give me shit, because like, I'm a sorcerer, and I don't have to read books

or whatever. So it's like, you do still have to read books, Maveris. I just, I'm still unclear on why. But, you need to learn how to control your magic. You can just go throwing fireballs at every problem. Just cause I can't articulate it, doesn't mean I can't control it myself.

Like, I feel like I have control over it You are in a moat right now with a man who is nude sitting on a leaf drinking beer Hey, you know what I'm gonna fight this guy fuck this guy Kick his ass scooter starts to get out and just like I can't between a cooter cruder. This is my dad. I just found out Don't tell the other crigs, I'm trying it. Well, I'm your cousin if you so that makes him my cousin uncle. Well, I'm holding cooter back, but really, really loose. Cooter, front over in hugs, Lucana.

Ah, blood of my blood. Nice to meet you, cooter. Cooter of the crick-oat. He's call me Cooter. Wow, this moat's gotten real brown. I'm gonna go sleep in the woods. Cooter walks off and just passes out immediately. Maverick, I got your jersey. I did spell unscoulded with a K.

I thought you might like that. That's fucking tight. Oh, can you make it a backwards K-lo? Oh, yes. Absolutely. It's already backwards. Do you want me to make it forwards? It was already backwards. Oh, okay. No, it's already backwards. Do you want me to make it forwards? It was already backwards. Oh, okay, no, keep it backwards.

Okay, keep it backwards, great. All right, children, let's go into the city. You see Lucana dismisses his little traveling party, tells Erdan to go off ahead, tells the guards and stuff to disperse. You guys see that the gates of the city are open, but there is a line of guards here. They wear tabards with glade homes colors, purple, silver, and gold with a silver tree in the middle. Their

helms are ornate and elegant and accentuate their elven ears. Some of them carry pristine great swords that gleam. Others up in the towers are armed with bows and others have short swords at their side. You enter the city and see that it's much like Esri. There are unseen servants going around doing menial tasks. A broom sweeps the road in the city square. There is a giant fountain with a statue of Arathas, the goddess of knowledge and civilization reaching her hand out to wizards below her, water flowing from her hands into their awaiting palms. Unlike

Ezri, this has a sort of old world feel to compare to the real world. It feels a bit European with cobblestone streets and shops and homes packed closely together. It's a mix of this classic old town with arcane flair. You'll see this quaint apothecary, but around it there are these spinning 3D astral lab things that appear to be moving in perpetual motion. The street lights are all floating orbs that give off light purple glow. For being in the city square though, you do notice it's a bit strange. You don't see a lot of people. The population problem is pretty apparent.

But you guys do see a group of nobles and unlike the, the high-olds that you guys were traveling with were pretty friendly. They were like straight-laced, but they were cool with you. They didn't turn their nose up at you or anything. You see some nobles wearing purple and gold like the royal colors of the city give a look at moonshine in particular and then turn to each other and begin to whisper and hit that them through the gap between my front teeth. That's right. You're looking at the future headmaster of the university moonshine at Tia scoff all you want.

Damn moonshine you didn't tell me you were there vicious. Yeah, I don't know. We'll talk about that dad There's other ways we can connect other than having the same job Interesting theory he rides in silence On his weird worm just going Oh, that seems still going huh? Yeah, he called it back after he finished yelling at everyone You know no one else is on Mounts at this point. Well, there's nothing weird about this.

You see the people are more looking at Lukonis than they are at you. Can I just, I just got to settle something for myself for a second. So I'm on verse, so I'm gonna take Lukonis aside and just say, Dad, I know that we have different opinions on Crick Elves, but it just seems like there's more than enough space to bring the Crick Elves in here.

Munchan, don't get me wrong. People drinking beer in our ancient moat drives me absolutely into an insane fury, but I don't have a problem with the Crick people. I once loved your mother. So why don't you let them in here? It's not that easy. I don't get to make that decision. Okay, but if your voice ever mattered or if anyone ever called upon you, you would invite them in, right?

You see he hesitates for a beat of course Okay, good. Thank you All right, y'all let's get fucked up Yo, Bavris, you got a half of this What's up? What am I huffing? I passed by. I'm just having some crack water. Yeah, don't even ask, just huff.

Just Maverick takes a huge huff. Go ahead and make a constitution saving throw. Oh, 19? Oh man, you hold your shit. I knew this kid could hang. I'm here to fucking party. Why are you smelling that little water bottle? You know what I mean?

Oh my god, you never had crick water? All your times can soar when me and all you never had crick water, get your nostrils over here. Yeah, headmaster, uh, huff it. Yeah. Just, uh, it's, sir, just maybe a, just maybe a waft. I walked to his grave. I, I, I, your whole nose in it.

I have never had crick water and I never will. Um, Moonshan, go ahead and give an insight check. Ooh. 24. This man has had Crickwater before. Dang, I knew there was some dirty in there. Deep in there. Yeah.

Deep dirt. You see, Lucana's takes you through the city square and brings you towards the university. You begin to see these arcane lanterns that look like gas lamps that are usually purple, but will occasionally fade into a red or a blue. You begin to see dormitories. These buildings packed tightly together. They're labeled by their wizard school. You see one for avocars and chancers, abjures, even one for necromancy that looks a bit more dark and menacing. The trees around it are dead, and a few pale students just walk amongst themselves outside, one just creepily stares at nothing.

These guys are crazy. You have a party there. Good afternoon, Milton. Good afternoon. Weirdos. Salt Milton. Navris, where's your dorm? You know, to be honest, I'm sort of lost.

Uh, haven't been over to this. But you mean you're lost. It's just a road with all the dormitories. The sorcerer dorms all the way at the end. Have you not been staying in your room? No, no, no, yeah, well, I've been, yeah, I've been staying in my room. Uh, but I just, I haven't really come over to, uh, what, Lisa? Can I do an inside check?

This kid's been staying in the river. I don't even need inside check. I got a 15. He got a 21. Have you been staying in your room? Never since I guess found a secret classroom that I still have. You haven't been, how have you been going here for two years? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The dorms are just a little like,

you're up at each other's asses a little bit, and you know, that's like cool if you're whatever. You have one, you should have one roommate. Yeah, you know, like, it's just sucks to just be in the same room as a guy, just like all the time. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, I mean, if something about it, your bedroom is also someone else's bedroom. Yes, okay. And is the living room.

No, you don't like a tiny little kitchen. Me as a 400-year-old elf, arch wizard, would maybe not like to stay in a room with another college student, no, but you are your student here. Oh, man. If you're not using your room, do you think I could get a coup d'arupitri in there? I mean, that sounds perfectly fine. That's all relaxed. They need to enroll in the school.

What's the mini fridge situation? Well, it was like, this guy has like all, like, Carl in my roommate. It's just sort of like a lot of his food. And he's like, does like a meal prep situation. And it's like, it's just sort of like a lot of his food. And he's like just like a meal prep situation. And it's like, it's responsible, but. So that's why I was like, I'm just gonna be sounding my own thing. I understand.

That is like really crazy to be in college and meal prepping. Like that's not so much that you're supposed to do. What's weird, I did that. What's weird about that? That sounds pretty cool. That guy got assigned to me. I had no say in this. That's bullshit, man.

Where is? Carl's a good guy. I was a good kid Well, it's fun Carl. No, don't You see out from Deep down down the road. You see a yellow banner for like a sorcerer hall and you see Another tiefling hangs out the window. What's up guys? So Carl what's going on Carl? What's up? I think Carl what up? Hey Carl, what's for dinner? We got like some lean chicken and

side of asparagus and some rice and just that for like a week Well for dinner we got for breakfast. I got poached eggs, a little bit of toast. It's just no frito. I'm going to need 14 of those eggs real quick. You ought to sign up for it, man. I paid my parents paid a pretty penny for this. So, get me out of there. OK, I see.

We'll reassign you to a different room. Just smells like eggs, huh? You know what? You see, he magically produces a set of keys and he hands it to you, Moon Shiningos. There's still another night before the tournament. So you all can stay in a room in the sorcerer dorm tonight and Maveris, should this all work out?

You don't have like a mansion or something, I heard. Yeah, I thought- I thought- I thought I would just stay in a dorm, I just heard the- I don't have like a mansion or something. I heard something. Yeah, I thought. Would you like to stay in a dorm? I'm down in the stand, a dorm, I just heard the... I wouldn't mind, I mean, perhaps you're getting me into some sort of like high-elf snobbery, but that tent that was actually a mansion on the inside with some dope shit.

I could certainly make you a mansion tent. Wow, I've been here for two years. I've been here for two years. You could learn how to do that, you know? Must be nice. Must be nice. If you win two clasps, Been here for two years. I've been here for two years. You could learn how to do that. Most preference. If you went too clad, there's the option of mansion tent or we all shack up with Carl.

When we used to go on green team campouts, Scott Master Diny would always sleep in a mansion tent and he wouldn't let the other green team sleep in. I would love to stay in your mansion tent. Yeah, that'd be great. Is there like a nightlife scene around here that we might want to post that tent up next to you? Honestly, for me, and the circles I run in, not great.

That's why I was out there hanging out with the Crickles and stuff because this guy's party and it's like, I guess you. The world might end tomorrow, so if everyone could get a good night's sleep tonight party like it's like I want to Can I show you the university? Oh? Yeah, sure. Yes. Yes, that I do want to see where you work Bring your daughter to work day Let's bring your daughter to work day everyone. We're going to the universe. We all go then or

Do you want to die tomorrow? I'm just asking you. I just want to prove. You're just going to use the specific points to you, Ardon. Do you want to die tomorrow? I literally die all the time. But you are of my blood, my half-elf brother. I hard-run cries uncontrollable for a second.

Oh my god. Beverly kind of like nervously sidles up to Lucana. So I was like, I would like to see the university. Good, thank you. Dad, I do want to see you. Okay, I could go for a tour. Let's chew. You've probably never been inside the castle proper.

My God, man. I mean, I lost a Frisbee in there at one point, but... Just make another one with your magic. I just, you know what Frisbee in there, one point, but... Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha more populated because students from all over come to study here. You see a mixed crew with a dwarf and elf and a gnome, a few humans. You even see a couple goblins. You see that the guards that patrol this area are wearing red, black, and silver, like luchonis, and the crew that he traveled with. This is different than the purple, gold, and silver of the city guards and the royals. So you can kind of see that there are two factions at play here in the city.

As you enter the courtyard, you see a few students not at Luconis. He kind of nods respectfully back. And then as you guys pass them, you see they turn and giggle to each other as he walks away. Oh, oh. Oh, that makes me feel for my dad. Dad, it seems like you run that ship around here.

I'm impressed. Yes, of course. Well, rules are important and I think people respect that. Well, I'm really impressed with what you put together. Thank you. So you guys go through the courtyard to a set of stairs that takes you across a bridge to the university. You see that the castle is essentially an island within the island. The floating castle is in the middle of a giant hole in the middle of the city.

You look down below off the side of the bridge and you just see water in the deep distance below. But head of you, you see the university castle. It is perfectly imperfect. You see some of the towers hang at strange angles and curve, but you can just feel all the magic of this place and you know that it's being held up by something other than just the stone that it's built from.

And there are floating orbs of yellow casting a beautiful glow on it. You guys have traveled all day, so it is nighttime by now. So you guys cross the bridge and enter the castle into the Great Hall. It's this enormous intricate room that combines the new with the old long oak tables with long benches. You see above you are moving chandeliers of colorful orbs across the walls. Are banners representing the different schools of magic.

Black orbs float over the necromancy tables, blue over the avocars, it's a spectrum. On the other side of the room, there are big red chairs lined with silver, sitting on a raised platform with a table in front of them, looks to be where the master sit, behind them is a wall of artifacts, each sitting in a neat cubby that spans the entire back wall all the way up to the ceiling. You see Luconus takes you over, um, and he grabs moonshine, and he grabs hard one, and he goes, here they are, the treasures of our people.

That's a lovely cubby. Yeah, what are they all? Yeah, what are they all? Well, this one is most important of all. You see, he uses a telekinetic spell to pull down the thinking cap, this crown. From far away, it just looks like this modest kind of simple brass crown. It floats down from the top. You see, it's in the middle cubby all the way at the top of the ceiling. It's like 150 feet up and

again, it looks it looks simple. It looks like a very modest crown until you see it up close and you see the intricacies of the design. It looks like the inside of a watch with all these tiny gears and cogs moving. This could not have been made by humanoid hands. It's just so intricate. It's like a little city of machinery in a crown, and it gives off powerful, powerful, powerful arcane vibes. Just being near it makes you feel more intelligent.

vibes, just being near it makes you feel more intelligent. So my frisbee or is this your frisbee? No, okay, I guess it's not. Pops, I got question. Yes. Who are we up against here? You know, I guess I was so eager to get to the tourney that I maybe didn't ask a bunch of questions and I was wondering, who do we think is going to come along and try and steal this and what do you think they want to do with it? Well, there will be mages from all of the various schools around Bohemia that includes places like Esri, which we know are under chosen control. We also know that because of the grave robbers, you saw dwarves there, you saw halflings there,

who knows if the one crew of elves that Erdan traveled with, whether or not they were the only elves that are working against us. And what sort of power lies in this artifact? The Nawa Theal was gifted to us by the goddess Arathas, and it gave Bohemia the gift of magic. And we, the elves, her chosen children, the reason we have more of an affinity for magic, it's the reason we have more of an affinity for magic. It's the reason the city itself is magic.

Should we lose this, we would still be able to cast spells, but it wouldn't be with the same power. Future elves, perhaps, wouldn't have our innate magical abilities. And that's just thinking in the far distant future, likely in this current scenario of war, if someone gets ahold of this, it's game over. Has the crown ever left? Glade home? So the elves have won the tournament every time, except for one year, like 2,000 years ago,

a gnome won it, and we were at war for like a hundred years. So kind of treachery, yes. But we got it back. I can not imagine he was an honorable, Tom Vintingles distant ancestor. Yeah. Okay, I see. So we have to keep this thing here to protect our people.

Yes, I wiggle my ears. keep this thing here to protect our people. Yes. I wiggle my ears. Hey, how'd you learn how to do that so quick? I practiced last night because I only had to transfer nine and a half hours. You're floating off the ground. Pretty cool, right? Are there any other Elven teams that will be competing?

I know of one other Elven team that will be participating. It's a fucking carol. Carol is a tiefling and carol is not participating. If one of us, okay, everyone huddle up. If one of us gets hurt, carol fills in for us. Carol's the sub. Carol's the ultimate guy. Are we totally solid guy?

He is a solid guy. I think we all agree that Carl's solid. It's not like a hang situation, but he's like a great guy. He's the manager. He's always got meals. That's awesome. That would be awesome for him.

Yeah. So I just want to say thank you for choosing me as champion. I know I'm like a little out there, but like I appreciate the opportunity. You see Lucana is extremely taken aback and he goes, oh, yes, it is a great honor that we have bestowed upon you and I'm sure you'll make us very proud, Mavris. Thank you. Can I do a search for the first B? Yes. 14. 14. You look around, you start like digging into the cubby, and your father goes like,

oh please don't touch those. Anyway, Mavris here will be the champion of the university. It's not just schools that are competing, it's also mage guilds. So the city of Gladeholm, the Royal Party, I have a bit of friction with, if you will, but the royals will be sending their own wizard team to compete. their own wizard team to compete. So best case scenario, if you can't win, maybe they win an art traders. That would be not the worst. I don't know. It's a bit of a subway series. Let's just play it safe and dunk on those dudes. I think we should just dunk on them. I think we should just dunk on them. I pass my avarice, I'm more crick watered. Yeah, don't go on the royal. Just hocks it so hard. Ha ha ha. You see, Lucana's, are you taking another costume?

Yeah, the 12. Nice. But you're starting to get a little messed up. And Lucana's looks a little jealous and he goes, give me that. I suppose I should be connecting more with my daughter's culture. I look wide-eyed in general. Careful, sir. Oh my god. He takes. I should be connecting more with my daughter's culture. I look wide-eyed at each other.

Careful, sir. Oh my God. He takes... I do the little link around the arms with my own crit water so that we're linked at the elbow and we can hop at the same time. Three, two, one. Blood of my blood.

We sheltered. Oh, okay. And he does a little bit. The tiniest little sniff. Instantly passes out. You see, instantly passes out. And then he wakes up a second later. Oh my, God's. Oh, you see, he is already extremely messed up. Oh my, I have to work so hard tomorrow. Hold on, is there coffee in this room? You can certainly like conjure some coffee. Yeah, there's um, I appreciate you playing along. Unseen servants come by. You do see that there are sort of other people moving

about. It's um, school does not seem to be in session at the moment because it is night time, but you do see unseen servants that are kind of, um, floating, uh, wearing robes, and some of them are guards. They're wearing, like, breast plates, just look like air elementals, um, and, um, it just kind of looks like breast plates and stuff, just kind of like bobbing through the air and doing things. Um, one comes over and brings them a little bit of coffee, goes, oh, thank you. Do you guys want to see something cool? Absolutely. One comes over and brings him a little bit of coffee, goes, oh, thank you.

Do you guys want to see something cool? Absolutely. I'm doing all right. Sweet, everyone follow me. I don't know. You'll be on his book, Dylan. You see, he starts staggering down the hall. He just starts laughing to himself. Oh boy.

Bearbucked. I've been here for two years, I've never seen anything close to this. It's kind of fun to see that there's another side in there. You guys see, he walks. Can we do a dirty check? See how dirty he is? See how dirty he is, yeah. It's a filthy father, honestly.

Oh, wait. Oh god, David. I almost got a nap 20, but then it was leaned on the side. 19. 19. He's giggling himself. He's kind of having fun Cool, everyone come this way don't let anyone see you okay? Okay, yeah everyone shut up everyone shut up the fuck up Stop laughing See um bounders in there the whole time just kind of like quietly drinking, um, but heavy He's not competing tomorrow and bounders cracking up. We're gonna get in trouble. I'm not gonna ever with the headmaster.

All right, come this way. It opens a door in the corner of the room that takes you to a stairwell and a tower. You see he walks up to the first step and stomps on it exactly 19 times and the stair drops out and you see he falls down through a shoot and he just starts laughing and giggling uncontrollably and you're just booming through and then the step comes back. I step 19 times on it. You go down through the shoot. And I said, see, on the other side.

I do a little tap dance 19 times and then I can't roll down. Hell yeah. Jump right down, never stress a dive in the same time. Go ahead and make a deck, a deck check. Dude, you're gonna get a stock. Oh, that's not that bad. 16. 16, you do make it through, it like gashes your calves.

45. You did the equivalent of like bounding over a fence and cutting yourself. Oh fuck, you made it. Did you okay? Yeah, I'm fine. That was pretty awesome though. It's definitely an out-fuck situation

I touch hands him Thank you guys are following through the shoot together occasionally getting like jammed up Oh, sure horns are sharp brutal. Yes, sorry dude It's okay. They're cool. Bounder goes up and does it yeah, I'll go up and And swan dive head first goes up and does it? Yeah, I'll go up and swand I've had first. Hard one follows suit. Doesn't very dangerous, swand I. You guys fall down the chute and you

land in a very dark room that has a light green glow. And you guys are kind of in a pile. Normally, people wouldn't come down here in a big group. So you all kind of just land on each other. And Lucana's goes, Quicksis, where are you? And you guys here, this giant beach-sheel snore,

and out from the shadows, you see a brass dragon emerges. Is this your pet? No, not exactly. He works for the school. He's actually my coworker. Oh, I'm so sorry. Hello, everyone. My name is Koiksus. It's a pleasure to meet all of you. You know I'm prostrated. I bow and in Draconic I say, Sotted.

I used to he answers back in Draconic, what's up, what's up? We're just having a night, we're just hanging out, what's going on down here. Right on, just, you know, guarding some ancient relics like I'm known to do. Hell yeah, hell yeah, hell yeah. Like you're just like growling back and forth.

Yeah, you got just little grunts back and forth between the dragon and the draconic blood sorcerer. And Lucanus goes, Quixis guards one of our most powerful machines in Glade Home. You gotta see this. of our most powerful machines in Glade Home. You gotta see this. And he lead you past Coexis. Coexis, until we meet again. Until we meet again, Malady.

I offer him some bronze. Some bronze. Do you hoard this? Is that rude? Oh, no, that's fine. I'm more of a guardian dragon than a horse. Give it to me. Give it to me now.

Give it to me for my horse. He takes it and he puts it in a pile. And you see, he was like sitting on a pile of treasure, but it looks like you have a h hoard back there, Quixis. No, I'm a guardian. I'm a guardian dragon. That's what I do. We don't go all have floors. I flash a gold coin. He bites it out of your hand and throws it back in the pile. There's mine now. This is all mine. I wish I had some cash.

I don't know how to order. Get me next time. Of course. Get me next time. Thank you. Get me next time, thank you. Great work, Wixas. You guys see Lucana takes you into this next room, and there is a strange device in here. There's a platform surrounded by a circle of columns, and in the center is a glowing green rock.

This emerald arcane cylinder. And he goes, besides the Noah Thea, this is perhaps our most powerful artifact. It was designed by our ancestors to protect Gladehome. If you cast a spell into it, it will cast a spell on the entire city. We once used it to teleport to the Feywild. This is too powerful of an artifact. Yes, that is why we have a brass dragon guarding it. Oh, can I ask you something? Yes.

What if I farted into it? That would make everything in Glade Home smell like farts. And if you do that, it is highly against the law to use this. So you see he's instantly kind of realizing how much you fucked up, I bring you guys down here. Can I cast guidance on it so that everyone in the city gets to add? As you go to like lift your finger up

and he senses magic, he counters spells it and he gets dead serious and he goes, we will be beheaded if we use this, everyone out. You see he stops like he takes out of being drunk. I don't know what I was thinking. I don't know what I was thinking, bringing you all down here. I'm sorry, that I was trying to do something nice.

I wasn't gonna do something. I was just gonna give everyone guidance. They would know then that you would use it. Even if you use it for good, you're still using it. Okay, follow up question. Our fart spells. He casts a control person and just like, makes you start walking out of the blue.

We need to go now. Okay. And he walks back under where like the shoot was. And you see he once again clicks 19 times on the floor and shoots back up. I do the same. Yeah, you guys all do the same. Quick sis goes,

Hey, don't feel too bad about it. I was really gonna fart in it. I was just honestly, I just wanted to. He really shouldn't fart in it. I wasn't going to, I don't even have to fart. I squeezed a tiny tube and then it's time I put my foot down. He snapped all of it.

Whoa. You jump, you jump up into the shoes. Yeah, I go up Skeleton Luzh style. Awesome. You guys all fly back up the shoes. When you get back up. You see Lucana's looks super worried and he goes I'm sorry dad. I really wasn't trying to do some in silly I was trying to do something sweet. No, it's okay. It is my fault for I thought it'd be cute if everyone got to add something to their next role It's I I agree I your heart was in the right place, but I understand why it feel that. Yes, it's okay, Munchan.

I shouldn't have brought anyone down there. That was my mistake. I thought it was kind of cool. Yes. It felt special. The share something would be. It was nice. I should be going.

I need to begin prepping for tomorrow. I've already slipped up enough today. I'll see all of you tomorrow. Please Know that the consequences of this are real Can you give me any hint as to what's going on tomorrow? So I know what spells to stock Unfortunately, that would be against the rules. They screen all of the masters, and they'll actually screen all of you tomorrow as well to make sure that no one's clue do in. And also, the different masters from the different schools

plan different events. I'm not clued in on it until the very last minute on a lot of the events. Okay, that's it. One thing that has always been the same though, the fourth round is an all-out free-for-all between the remaining teams in a fight for the crown, for the thinking cap, in this very castle.

Sounds fun, kind of. Does anything go? Yeah, that sounds awesome. Yes, many, many people have perished in the final round. Yeah, probably get hit by like a chair that's flying around or something. It could happen. Sometimes, you know, a major will just cast like power word kill or something and somebody will just die

instantly. That type of deal. People slipping on fruit a lot. All that. No. All right. Beverly's like changing his strategy on the floor. But really, I should be going. Thank you for showing us around.

Yeah, thanks Dad. I really enjoyed it. Thank you, Dad, for work day, huh? Would you mind writing me a letter of recommendation if everyone would go here in the future? Oh, you know me. You can just come here. Oh, cool.

Yeah, it's fine. Cool. Maybe if we save the world, I'll go to college. That would be great. Hey, headmaster. Oh cool. Yeah, it's fine. Cool. Maybe if we save the world I'll go to college. That would be great. Headmaster. Yeah, let's kick some mean nerds butts. Yes, yes, let's let's kick their let's kick their asses. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, good night, sir.

It's her. Okay, you sure you want to go because I had a little something planned for everyone once we retire But it's also no big if you guys have to do I should I should probably prepare for tomorrow. All right by Paps I give my hug and good night my daughter blood of my blood. I love you. We could leave it at my daughter Okay, but actually let's leave it. I love you because I love you too. Maybe take out the middle part But actually, let's leave it out. I love you because I love you too. Maybe take out the middle part Turns to hard one blood of my blood. I Cry Crock The Pride of the elves flows through you

Jesus Everyone's so tall water works when I meet this fake dead That's gonna happen when I meet the real dude. You guys are taken by an unseen servant. This air elemental in like servants regalia with like red, the red and the black and the silver of the university. And they take you over to the sorcerer's dorm and take you to a room.

You see it is this nice little bedroom with a couple beds but you do see in the middle of it there is a tent prepared. I thought he forgot. He really does care. He really does. I dive into the tent. Yeah, I get. I've been here for two years. Share your room with a guy named Carl. Can I see your spell book? Mavericks, there's a Frisbee in here. Mavericks Dimes. Dive into this magnificent mansion. I snoop through the bathroom for toiletries.

What kind of Elvin Pilsie's taking? Who's Dad's Musk? He has lots of Elvin perfumes and colognes and such. He's a fancy lad. I started experimenting and mixing them. I just rub wiped wipes on my neck. He's not clean. Beverly shows all of them how to use the bidet. Papa won't stop using this or water fountain.

It's fine, honestly. I drink it and then immediately start spitting up. Get it out. That's a funny bill, man. I got to find the kitchen because I am now a level 11 druid which means I have a 6th level spell, and I have just got the spell that I was destined to do. So can I find the kitchen? Yeah, of course, yeah, there's a little kitchen with a little stove top. All right, for the next 10 minutes, y'all just hear

Alright, for the next 10 minutes, y'all just hear pots banging as I cast heroes feast. Yes, hell yes. You bring forth a great feast, including magnificent food and drink. The feast takes one hour to consume and disappears at the end of that time. And the beneficial effects don't set in until the hour is over. Up to 12 other creatures can partake of the feast. A creature that partakes of the feast gains several benefits. The creature is cured of all diseases in poison, becomes immune to poison, and being frightened, and makes all wisdom-saving throws with advantage. Its hit point maximum also increases by 2d10 and it gains the same number of hit points.

These benefits last 24 hours. Oh, wow. We don't have to do dishes. Oh my God. What do you make? Jambalaj, card. Jambalaj. Cardads, cardads, and Jambalaj.

This is a fucking Jero's Jambalaj. This is legendary Jambalaj. This soup is singing. Yeah, the crowd dad's cooked themselves. That's Carl. That's Carl. That's gonna be so pissed. He missed out on this. He ain't hearing knock outside. You guys meal-perpping in there? Carl, it's- Let's go on there, dude.

Unfortunately, nothing's happening. No. Go suck on an egg, Carl. Come on. Just be right there. I would know. Carl, you have a solid guy, but just go suck on an egg, Carl. Wow. Just going to hang out with now. Carl, you have to solve it, guy. But just go suck on an egg, my man. All right. I tap up, Madras.

Bound or eats a bunch of it, even though he's not competing tomorrow. He has had the best day. It's up to 12 people. We could invite Carl in. I know what Carl, Carl, what's up? You're not competing tomorrow, right? No. You want to, you know what a fucking grub. He's already in the tent and he jumps in. Get in here. Oh wow. What's up guys? Hey Carl. Hey. So I just grabbed a plate. Cool. Yeah. How's we going, Carl? You're not competing tomorrow. Are you on another team? Oh, no, no, no

I was gonna go watch. I thought that would be cool. Yeah, yeah I'm not embarrassed first time sorcerers ever competed. Hey Carl really first time Yeah, you know how like the wizards and you know to a lesser extent the warlocks are about like you know They're the way that they approach magic and you know what what kind of will say follow and I'm a little outside I guess I'm sort of disrupting that a little bit. Oh, I like it. Yeah It's like we still need to read like a lot of books and stuff because you know we have our own things to master I get on Carl. Oh Carl I can't believe you read book

You don't read you don't I mean I don't believe you read book. Too much reading. You don't read, you don't, I mean, I don't read either. Nice. Call your brother five books with you. Let's know. Shut up. Dead Arms Beverly. Oh. That's what's up, Carl.

I get on, I get on, I get on, I get on, I get on. I get on, I get on. I get on Beverly. I get on, I get on, I get on. I draw my hammer. I go into a rage and I get our belly. I did our belly. I throw my hammer. I go into a rage and I did our everyone. Oh, man. Everyone isn't eating enough.

All right, second health things. It is the best meal you guys have ever had. You've never felt better after a meal. I can feel the shrimp and the crud at singing in my my stomach and everyone gets 14 extra hit points for two goals. Cheese. Yeah. I'm looking hard.

Here must be six is my very first six level spell of Nevercats. What does it go? What a there's never been a better time to use this. You just fully know you have something to do tomorrow. Just carbon up. You got a carbub. I'm far. Bound or it looks like he's gained aub. I'm part of the pound. Boundoir looks like he's gained

from pounds and a hundred pounds. Hey, it's no good. I look at all the empty beer cans. You've had a lot of carbohydrates. Yeah, I know. You're just balancing that bowl perfectly. It's an off day. It's an off day.

I'm fine. I earned it. Yeah. I take hard one to the side. You guys know this guy. You're just kind of hanging on. He's cool. I was just making sure.

I just, you know, you remember like a guy who's like not your dad, but he's kind of your dad. He's cool. Okay, I was just making sure. I just, you know. You remember like a guy who's like, not your dad, but he's kind of your dad? Beverly has five of those. Yeah. Awesome. Yeah, I know. Sorry about that.

Yeah, what's your dad like? Oh, my dad just is like also a sorcerer. And he like, you know, a kind of lot of pressure from him to like come here and like do the whole, you know, magic school thing. A lot of my boys have got a house for the summer, like they're taking a year.

Oh, they're doing a gap year? Yeah, they're doing like, they're not going to school, they're hanging out, they're working, but they like hang out. And that sounds pretty fucking awesome to me, but it is pretty cool to be here too. You hear Carl pipes up and he goes, yeah, and I work and go to school.

So you can actually, like, still get a job if you want, Mattress. Yeah. We can, yeah, we can be. Carl leave, you say the phone. You see Carl, Carl looks at hard one. Do you have, do you have a problem with me, dude? I think you're cool as long as Mavericks is cool. Yeah, yeah, no, no, Carl's cool, Carl's cool.

But Mavericks is my dude. Have you guys known each other for a while? Like, what's your... What is it about? Iron Hound? This guy offered me a leaf within moments of meeting. Which is it feels like we were roommates and instantly I was just in a single.

Carl, I have a question for you. Yeah, that's great. Do you know how to use this spell to make like a big space, small space bigger on the inside? Yeah, more than kind of magnificent mansion. Then why would you do that? I'm afraid.

Even Liam and Donnie have. Carl, what are you doing? Why wouldn't you just make a room in a cabinet or something? Why are we sharing the same room? We're only there for the first day of school, dude. I didn't know how you'd do the spell yet. If you hung out and just like watered our friendship

a little bit, maybe it would blossom. Carl gets up and leaves. Carl. Moon China's stitching that into a pillow. Mavericks is just suddenly shaken by that. It's like, wow. Okay, yeah. Takes work. that into a pillow. Mavericks is just suddenly shaken by that. Wow. That's true.

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are wearing bird dogs. To get yours and a free Yeti-style tumbler, go to birddogs.com slash pop-off or enter promo code pop-off at checkout. That's birddogs.com slash pop-off or promo code pop-off for a free Yeti-style tumbler. You won't want to take your bird dogs off, we promise you. Okay, that's it for me, Go team pants and enjoy the show. Yeah, but that's, I'm excited to be here. And I couldn't, since I'm the first source we're doing in a while, all the wizards were kind of weird about

being in my squad. And so it's nice to have just some fresh blood around. Absolutely. But you know, hey, Matt, you know, they're right a little bit. It does take practice to get better stuff. Like, just look at my ass, for instance. It used to be so flat. What's up?

What are you talking about? No, I see like, I've been like, I've been like, Bill. Look at his ass, kid. He's a sweet bouncer. It's just like, fully drunk on a recliner. My, okay. This is not my dad. Stay right, you're ass.

Which is no, like you see, like I've been working my muscles, I've been like getting toned with hard one. I guess I don't have a before, so it's like, to me. Yeah, you know what? Point taken. Point taken. Yeah. Here it was more like this.

I've hold up my hand to just sort of like show where Bev's ass used to be. That's what used to be. Yeah. Now. Are you touching his ass? No he's not. Is he? Okay. Okay. What I'm saying is like, you know, I think that I understand that you have this innate knowledge, but like, yeah, you can work a little harder maybe. I feel like, you know, I, I feel like, maybe it's not cool to like books, but I like books and I think that maybe if you wanted to like go through some books together study a little bit, I'd love to help you out. I will speak on Bev's behalf and say that

I was very skeptical of the literate world thinking that reading was just sort of a tool of the, you know, the elites. And it is still, you know, it's still a tool that we've agreed upon matters, but it's also kind of fun. I started learning how to read. I can read Wolf Gawger was punch. Oh, yeah. I know that book. The children's book, but it's a great book. I remember reading it. That's where I'm at. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

You just started and we're sort of convinced you had to learn. No, yeah. It's awesome. It's one of my favorites. Yeah. Yeah, Bill, he knows. He sounds like he knows how to read.

Yeah. I'm going to go over here and put my speaking stone into a cup and you kind of vibe out. Okay. Yeah. Well, I mean, Beverly, that's a really good point. I do feel like, you know, I've been around a lot of people that are like way, just like way too into reading

and like to the point where they're like, they hold it over you a little bit and that kind of turned me off of it, like that sort of vibe. But this is what you're saying makes sense to me. And I used to be that way a little bit. I come from a people that loves to know their history and kind of tout it. But I don't know, I think ever since traveling

with my friends here, I've learned that there's a lot of different ways to learn and acquire knowledge. And you gotta find what's right for you. Hey, how about this? You look like maybe you're pretty good at pranking people and kind of cutting loose. I mean, look, I'm not bad at it. Maybe we can do like a group study thing

where like you teach me some goofs and I'll teach you some study tips. You know what? I'll give it a shot. All right. Can we do a study group? Sure. Munchine starts blasting music that really interrupts

the study group. Blasting number one. Where'd you find it? Cup that big. Sure. Moon Giant starts blasting music that really interrupts the studio. Listen number one, where'd you find it cup that big? It's my bra. Lesson number one. Concentration while casting spells is important, sometimes people will be playing music very loud. You're going to be able to do that. So you guys, stay up way too late.

You do the lead opposite thing that you should be doing. Sleep in, miss the turn of the... No! What time is it? Just like how people would treat having a test in college or something instead of it being a tournament, you know, that might decide the fate of the world. So you guys just like stay up a little bit.

I have in my hero's feast. You did your hero's feast. You guys stay up a little too late, listening to Cutty, probably getting a little too deep with Maveris. So I should do it a little bit. A little bit. It's not fucking rules, man. Oh, it owns.

You guys wake up the next morning, and it is the day of the tournament as you leave the Sorcerer dormitory you see more people filing into the city including many Crick Elves You do see that there are no youngins though It looks like and probably because the tournament is dangerous They probably don't want many children around. But yeah, today all are welcome to celebrate during the tournament. It's almost like a festival for the city. So you just travel to the castle. You see many mages and teachers and students, dangerous, waters, and serious guards. You enter into the Great Hall and see that many teams have already been

seated in different areas. As you arrive this air elemental, that is wearing like an ornamental breastplate and a cape of red and black, comes up to you and leads you guys over to a table. And you're seated under the Sorcerer's banner. You see this banner of yellow with a white flame and above you, the chandelier glows yellow. You see that there is already food in front of you and unseen servant comes and fills up your glasses with them water. I think I'm really nervous now

because it's like last night we were having fun, but now it feels like, now it feels intense. So I think I'm not really eating. We probably ate a lot of crudettes too. I'm having my name, Moonshine. Yeah, that's a good one. You start really digging into like big, toky legs and stuff.

This is breakfast. While we're at the table, I would like to add on to Moonshine's Shines Heroes Feast. Feast in a speech? A feast in a speech. What is a feast without a speech? I'm going to be using my new feet that I picked up at level 12, Inspiring Leader Helio. So the way this works is I spend 10 minutes inspiring my companions, assuring up the resolve to fight.

When you do so, choose up to six friendly creatures, including yourself, within 30 feet. Each creature can gain temporary hit points equal to your level, plus your charisma modifier. So that's going to be, I believe, 16 extra hit points. Oh, we are coming into this thorny stack. 16? We are coming into this thorny stack 16 and I think I like really try to like

Stretch a metaphor and I like look at the cup of water and I'm like, you know friendship is like a cup of water And you fill it with the water and the water can be many forms, but in the cup It's togetherness because of the cohesion of the atoms and sometimes they're closer together because of Sometimes their ice and sometimes their gas but and sometimes friendship is a gas because it's fun Don't worry, mavers. They should only last ten more minutes You guys are weirdly inspired by it as you listen to it It doesn't make sense because the words don't add up to make me feel the way I feel and yet sense because the words don't add up to make me feel the way I feel and yet I feel like. What happens is eventually Beverly like takes a big motion and spills the water all over

himself. Oh no. Oh. And then we laugh so hard. It's a stream of consciousness which happens. And I'm like, oh, unseen servant, can I get some more water and then an entire picture of water falls on me? You guys are just laughing and having the time of your lives.

So you guys look around you at the different tables and the hall is filling up. You start to size up the competition. Oh, what do we see? You see dwarves, humans, halflings. A lot of the teams look to be one race because they're representing like a dwarven city or a prominently human one or something like that. You see a table of frost twin dwarves staring coldly at the people around them.

Some other teams that catch your eye. You see a gnome woman with long brown hair and a purple robe with white trimming. Guys, go ahead and give me perception checks. I got a nat one. Nat one. And this actually plays into what I was about to say. She looks kind of hot. I was just about to say she looks hot, doesn't she?

Yeah. I got an 18. 18. It's 20. Hard one. I've got to bounce something off you. That gnome is kind of hot, right? Let me see.

Hard one, you look in to check her out and you see that she's wearing a gold necklace. She can only be got on the outside. No, no, no, it's not on the inside. She wears a gold necklace with a sword on the end of it. And seated next to her are three clockwork temp lars. These big bulky brass knights with purple arcane batteries that give their eyes purple glow. You also see a table of extremely ominous looking dudes. Three of these dark nights in black plate mail and an echo-mancer in black with an iron

mask. You see another table that's just a bunch of dudes that look to be made of worms. You see one guy in a robe reaches out and tries to grab a cup and just a bunch of worms fall out. And behind you at a nearby table, Maveris, you hear a voice you recognize, go, Maveris, stay on school, what are you doing here? Ha, ha, ha, ha, and you turn around and you see this pretentious looking high-off with slicked backs over hair. This guy's name is

Ren. You've run into him before, like in the courtyard and stuff, never in class. He wears the royal purple and silver and gold of the royal family. And his team around him consists of two Elven warriors with great swords and another mage and they're all wearing the King's colors. I didn't even know that you went to this school. I barely do because I'm so smart. I don't even have to. He turns to his comrades. Maverickian school doesn't go to school. Eat my shit, Rin. Can I? Wait, I want to, I absolutely want to use my halfling stature to try and get into tabletop position on this guy Okay, are you doing a you have like don't you have something don't have things have something where they can like get through people's legs? Yeah, uh sweet go ahead and make a stealth check with advantage

No, I give you a help action. I give them a help action 13 No, that's good. I give you a help action. I give him a help action. We are. 13. You see, you crawl to go behind Ren without even looking, maverice. You see he smirks, points a finger down, and turns Beverly into a sheep. Come get your livestock. I guess you're gonna be a farmer now Okay, you know what that was a good use of polymorph, but you did not follow it up with a good Zanger Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't understand that were you talking Crick? Well, I'm sorry that you don't speak enough languages because I actually can understand you. So I guess I just speak more languages than you.

Oh, maybe the high-elvin speech is just more proper. I couldn't hear you through all the whistling between your teeth. Really? I take out my hammer. I see some of the unse- you see Erdan comes over and goes, please, you will get disqualified in the world.

We'll end. But how about the two, you know, factions from Glade Home don't kill each other. Only after he releases the Pollymore. Erdan. My friend was crawling on the ground. He lost his contacts and he just turned him into a sheep for no reason. What a psycho. What a fucking psycho. He looks at you, Mattress. Do you Do you think that I believe you right now?

Well, he's just, this is, he lost his context on the ground. He lost his context on the ground. Why would I lie about this? Why? Can I, I, oh, I cast guidance on, I'm going to make a descent to check. So you get to add a D4 to that.

Okay. Okay, I got a 24. He's the Erdan just shrugged and he goes, okay, actually no, that's airtight. He turns to Ryan and he goes, unsheep him immediately. He started it. What are you even talking about?

What are you even talking about? He doesn't even wear contacts, I don't think. So you're telling me, you can look into someone's eye and see if they're, I thought, that could have perception. You're not, you're not right. You're a psycho, they're all psycho. Because he's the other ones like, go to get their sword.

That is the thing is you wasted a fucking spell slot. He did Erdan 4% to, on cheap you. I instantly pop up minor illusion two contacts into my hands. Oh, there they were. Wow, wow, I got in your face. Both. Both contacts. Shot out of his eyes, so I was given a speech earlier. You see Erdan blinking a lot. Erdan turns to the table with Ren and the other

royal, the rest of the royal party and Erdan goes, you all know that provoking a fight is out of the rules. You could be beheaded for this. If someone were to get hurt, if you were to have started a fight. Erdan, please, we did no provocation. We didn't do anything. This failed. No, I'm talking him yelling at them.

Yes, so I mean, if you were all innocence, rules are rules, right? I'm not of you. Not if you would be crazy enough to start a fight. No, I don't think you need to be head them No, I think just like put him in the just want. I think really just rent. I just maybe take rent out. Yeah I'm going to go Good luck everyone Yo, Ren see you around 4, bitch. Yeah.

See you in the playground. Catch me outside, Ren. I'll see you in round 4 when you're in the stands. I can't wait for you to use a level, a third level call light name because you don't have any support levels. Sorry, do you only have one third level spell? Honestly, wonder what what your laugh would sound like if you said something that was actually fun. You must be so embarrassed.

You must be so embarrassed. Are you starting to feel like explode little sorcerer? You keep the, what's that little laugh? What is that little laugh? What's that little laugh? Your teeth never connect. Why would they connect? Your friends aren't laughing at your jokes. You said that little laugh. You're a little laugh. You're teeth never connect. Why would they connect?

Your friends aren't laughing at your jokes. Yeah, that's the weird part. It's like, it's one of your... Some of them laugh at a laugh, everyone. They all laugh and you actually like that. You see, well, I'm like, you're trying to eat your lower teeth. They all just like quietly go like, good one, red. Good one.

Fun, fun, fun over there. Solid crew. Yeah. Is your boys? But you guys finally, I took it back to the table, their jerseys are sick though. Yeah, it's cool. Is there anything we can do before?

No, these are sick, these are, these are sick. Wait, do ours match the, I think you know what it is. We all need to go crop. And then I cut me in bed. Are they yellow? Are they matching like the sorcerer colors? Because that's kind of the banner you got to match. We got to match them. Can we get a quick die job?

Yeah, yeah. We do a quick die job. I find some... Oh, what is that called? I find some saffron and a diamond yellow. All right. Can you turn them into kind of like a penny type of fabric? Yeah, okay, I do that. I'm just trying to drink fabric.

I'm just trying to drink fabric into a giant bucket in the middle of this pre-contestant. All the while making eye contact with Ren being like, oh, you think you started something? Oh, yeah. But you actually ended it for yourself. Look at that. You can see he chases just the way that eye contact

you just drew people into the lamp. And repeat. I do that top gun ice man thing. I'm like, I'm just like, I'm gonna take my teeth at him. He's just like fully trying to move on. We all do that. Yeah, I'm talking man, ice man. For sure. You guys are like two drunk guys at a bar that kind of like a little bit of a yelling match at a table, but the one guy is now just fully trying to move on with his night. I'm going over there. I'm going over there.

Finally, you guys hear a hush amongst the crowd as the masters enter and take their seats at the front. You see that there are more chairs than there were yesterday because it's for the leaders of all the different schools and all the guilds. You see gnomes, dwarves, humans, etc. There are about 15 people up there, all in ornate robes of different colors. You see Lucanus stands behind the table near his seat at the center and addresses the crowd. You see he looks out in the crowd and finds moonshine and he winks I went back

And then I look around I say sorry. I got you. Sorry y'all. You got a daddy's girl amongst you Yeah, it says so on the back of your jersey You see I was decided between that and the unschoolable, but I went for daddy's girl. The unschoolable daddy's girl. Oh yeah, I moved my hair aside and you see that it says, wow. So much text. And because it's a penny now, you can also see your new rib cage tattoo. That's the lower one, but on your side.

You look trashy as hell. They're burned to the greens. Oh, baby, they called me. on your side. He looks at himself. And Bender Greens. They didn't count me. Thank God we made it to crop top. This team's got four orders y'all. They did plan a little pinder. Hey, I hear your belly button. Oh yeah.

Oh hey, what's up dude? Yeah, that's kind of your name. So it's pretty good. He's my champion. You know how you're the champion of a university? Oh, yeah, I got it. I know no need to explain Hard one can I talk to you for a second? Yeah, what up? What's up? Hey, um, never so really cool I was afraid to talk to him yesterday. Do you think you could like put it on board? See he must like hang out in the gym. I

Honestly, I always like looking for a roommate and I just like control the gym So maybe I think now is not a great time to do this like competition But that instinct you had to like be afraid to talk to him. Yeah, like hang on to that Can we put a jersey in the gym? Oh Yeah, do I have a jersey left over? I throw a jersey in the gym Pob also is wearing a little jersey I draw Jersey in the gym. Pob also is wearing a little Jersey.

Oh, really? Me and Pob us Jersey are the same size. Yeah, the same size. You guys see, Lucanus clears his throat, and everybody's quiet, and he addresses the crowd. And he goes, wizards and waters, welcome to the So-Won-Amen! A day of magi! That's my new- Referred to in the comments, though.

I pull my clap. Referred to in the common tongue as mage madness. Oh! So much cooler. We have 32 teams from all over the realm, including some from the outer planes. You will all be competing in three rounds of single elimination competition that will test your strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma. After that, the final four teams will compete in a free-for-all battle for the thinking cap in this very castle.

This first round will test your dexterity and your charisma. Listen carefully, it will test your dexterity and your charisma, the 16 teams that pass the challenge, the quickest we'll move on to the next round. Seeing as us mages love throwing curveballs, we are going to forego the rest of the feast and begin the first event. Now you see that the masters all disappear and the other teams they all disappear to. The banners around the hall all change to be your colors. Yellow and white. You see the table and the chairs on the master's platform disappear and

a ghostly figure appears. A 12-foot tall, massively jacked, Elven woman in a white dress. You can see through her a bit. She appears to be some kind of spirit. She holds one arm up presentationally, takes a deep breath and... woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo you guys are thrown up against the wall at the entrance of the room. Everyone go ahead and roll initiative. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. 22. 15.

13. 12. Okay, so you guys see this Elven Amazonian ghost bar that has sent out force energy throughout the entire room throwing everything at you. You guys have been flung back into the wall towards the entrance of the hall. You guys were sitting near the end at the Sorcerer's table.

The room is 200 feet across. She's where the masters were sitting. Moonshine, you are first. I'll do enhanceability at a fifth level to give all four of us advantage on dexterity saving throws. Nice. That's a great move.

Cool. So, moonshine, you quickly get your bearings. You do that very cool Tifa Lockhart three point stance as you hit the wall. You instantly look up as a table comes towards you. But on initiative 20, so after Moon Shine, I am actually going to roll and see what kind of song she's singing here. You see she starts singing up for the opera seats. This is really like ancient Elvin, just the most extreme version of what your dad does, but in just this beautiful, operatic voice. And this is like an ancient Sylvan language.

So moonshine and Bev, you guys can go ahead and give me, I guess like history checks. Or just like a raw intelligence check to... 14! 17. You don't understand all of the words, but it is some kind of musical incantation. She's saying some, it is some kind of song of force, the word force keeps coming up. And you guys see as she sings and aims up towards the ceiling, bricks begin coming loose from the ceiling above you and falling down. Everybody go ahead and give me dexterity saving throws. With a bit as young, enhanceability.

Don't forget to add plus four to that as well, my friends. You guys aren't all direct. Oh, okay. plus four to that as well my friends. You guys aren't all directly next to each other. Nat 20 baby. Nice. At 19 plus my dex of so 23. 22. 16. Sweet.

Bev fails. Cool. But everyone else passes so they only take half. You guys start kind of diving out of the way, trying to get around these rocks. It is hard to even move forward. So as you kind of try to dodge, Bev, you get pinned back a little bit

and you take 36 damage, and everyone else takes 18. As these rocks come down on you, then that is hard one. Hard one you see, the castle is crumbling around you. All of these candelabras and tables and everything are flying up. Um. Um. Moonchan reflects on that inspiring speech that Bev just gave her and is very thankful that it happens. Watch out for water. And God bless containing water. How I

like didn't even lose anything. I'm imagining that I'm not, we're not trying to kill this elf person, right? It's up to you. It feels more, maybe I'll just... You are 200 feet away from her right now. Right, but I don't want up against the wall. I don't want to throw my javelin at her. Maybe I'll prepare a reaction.

Oh, that's nice. Yeah. Cool, nice. Hard one pinned against the wall. And more things begin to fly at you guys. You see, you see, once again, she points up to the balcony seats and begins letting out a beautiful low note. And there's a rumble from the building everyone give me Dex saving throws. 18, 18. 19. 17.

Moonshine takes half, she takes 16, everyone else takes 32 damage. Oh! That is, Matt versus turn. I just want to take a full movement action for, a full dash action for us. Okay, go ahead and make a Dixterity check with advantage. Okay. I got a one and a three. A two sandwich.

You blow back into the wall and you can't move. It's like that ride at the carnival where you, the gravator on? Yes, the gravator on. Wow, that was fucking sucks. It's training. Oh you blown away by my performance Yes Incredible you're really good

Go ahead and make a Persuasion check That's a 27 yo 27 27. Yeah. Um, you see she goes. Oh, thank you. Uh, and she begins to sing a super high falsetto. And, um, pulls you up into the air and shoots you forward towards her 30 feet. Ooh, that's incredible. I use my action that I've been saving to start applauding. 30 feet. Ooh, that's incredible. I use my action that I've been saving to start applauding. Go ahead and make a persuasion check. Bravo. Bravo. Or a deception check. 14. She looks at you with fire in her eyes and she goes, you Liiiight! And... I'm gonna roll to see what kind of damage the thing does.

Um, hard one, a bench flies at you. A bench? A bench flies at you. A bench flying a bench? Um, go ahead and make a dex save with a bench. A bench flying a bench. Ten. Ten fails. Sixteen damage and are pinned against the wall by this bench.

That is Bev Stern. Alright, so seeing the progress made by Maveris, I think Beverly is going to, first question, when the elf lady kind of directed her voice at Hard one. Did it leave like an opening? No, okay, so the the voice the vocal waves are just coming in all directions. Yes I'm still going to try and like plot a course behind like Tables and anything that's bolted down to try and like run through the eddies to get as close as I can I'm going to use a full dash action. So my hippie skippy boots. Go ahead and use Dude dexterity. Okay with advantage Suits my hippie skippy boots. Go ahead and use

Dude dexterity. Okay with advantage There we go 20 with a 20 you can move your full speed sweet so you get a hundred feet You are able to you do see that a couple of the tables are bolted down a little heavier than the other ones one Was like caught like one bench flew up at hard one before can Can we say as a free action I was singing as I ran? Sure. I sing. I am not content to admire you from afar. I must see you my star.

I am your sweet boy from the shore. Oh, joy. So long. Go ahead and make a performance check. Performance or persuasion? Performance. Okay. Ha ha ha. Shout to the channel.

No. She goes, you do sonomy. But she doesn't have, she can only do that once as a reaction She goes, you do son of me! But she doesn't have, she can only do that once as a reaction to like throw somebody back. So she doesn't do anything, she just yells at you in song. Very no. I think an entire picture of water lands on my head.

I think I'm gonna be a... That's in a different key than I was singing. That's back up. To you, Moonshine. Right now, hard one's pinned against the whole bunch of bench. Maveris's 30 feet ahead was able to flatter her. Bev was able to just like, book it against the wind. I'm a cast long stride on myself and book it. Sweet.

So that's 45 feet. Okay, I'm going to make a Dex save with advantage. 13. 13 will let you move half of your speed. 23 feet. Okay. I still from far away saying, I agree with what the young boy said.

Go ahead and make it for more and say. 17. You do not flatter me enough but you sounded better than the boy dude. Back to the drawing board. It is for this sweet spore wh horror. She's going to be belt out another force note. These are her lair actions on initiative 20. Number one, she hits another high note. She does the highest falsetto way higher than the one that pulled Maveris towards her. I need everybody to go ahead and give me deck saves to get your hands up over your ears. You guys see the glass had already fallen and broken as the table started

flying, but you see ones that are on the ground start shattering as she's just I got 20 nice. Oh good. I got 11 That I've been wrong with advantage and still wrong poorly. I yeah 18 Okay, I'm glad that y'all are wrong. Well, I think that makes me feel better about that seriously 22 22, okay, just maveris and Bev save you guys are quick enough. You see her like really gearing up. You see the dire frame moving and you cover your ears. But you guys moonshine and hard one,

you feel like your eardrums starting to explode and you start losing your center of balance. You're now gonna have disadvantage on dexterity saving throws, which since you have advantage that'll just equal out and you just, it center of balance, you're now gonna have disadvantage on dexterity saving throws, which since you have advantage, that'll just equal out and you just, it's just regular now. Okay.

So that is hard one's turn. Okay, I'm underneath this bench. Can I, I'm gonna take out my hammer and start pounding the bench like it's a wood block. Ha ha ha ha. Just trying to keep time like a giant metronome. Go ahead and make a performance check. I'm helping you out, Lady.

Your singing voice is very good, but your timing could be better. That's a five. Oh, God. Oh, no. You see, it is actually her layer action next, so I'll just pretend she's bitefully doing it at you, but really the mechanics are that she's just next. So you see, she lets out another note in horror.

You're totally off time, man. And she... Oh god, it's what. It's cause you made me fucking down. It's not easy to be in your band. Oh god, it's because you made me fucking down It's not easy to be in your band. You see a candle obra flies at you The candles are still on fire. Um, go ahead and give me a dexave. I Did failed Okay, oh wait, you know what? I'm gonna use indomitable

Okay, all right, one, two. Oh wait, you know what? I'm gonna use Indomitable. I get to, once a day I get to reroll a saving throw. Okay, go ahead. If I are, that's a net 19. 9.19, okay, you save. So you only take half the candle whizzes past you and like lands directly in your eye

but instantly goes out and just shatters against the wilds, wet. Joe, it's shatters. Jokes on you, eyes, wet. But you take halves, you take 10 damage, and you do not light on fire. That is, Matt versus turn. And you're 170 feet away. 170 feet away. I, I saw what Hard One did.

And was just like, maybe this is helpful. So I'm, my background is an outlander and to pick an instrument for that. So I have a flute. Yeah. Yeah. So I guess. Oh, shit, I gotta take out New Betsy.

Can I, would you, would you please let me accompany you or just at least at least least get that sort of, you know, when you have the special pass and you can be on the court side or the side of the stage. Let's see how good you are. Okay, so that's a performance, right? Yep, okay. So that's a 10.

Ah! You just, all of the air from all of the forest pressures is going into your fluid and just making the worst sounds. I can't really play right now. It's the worst thing I've ever heard. That is Bev's turn. Cool.

I'm going to try and get 50 feet closer. OK, I'm going to make a Dexave cool. You had past the thing so you still roll with advantage. Does a 16 pass. A 16 will allow you to move half your speed. Half my speed. Okay. Yeah. So I just moved 25. Yes. Okay. Great. So I'm going to move 25 feet straight to our 75 feet away from her. And as I'm doing that, I'm going to minor illusion the biggest bouquet of roses I can. And then I'm going to use Maychan to get it even further towards her. Oh wait, I probably can't do both at the same time.

Maychan is in action, so... My illusion is too. Okay, okay, so you just, yeah, you just have... Okay, I'll just... Maychan's not gonna get that far anyways. You hold out the bouquet of roses. Yeah, and I say... Bravo! Bravo, bravo! It's not gonna get that far anyway. So you hold out the bouquet of roses. Yeah, and I say

Bravo, I think that can be a number of different skills. So I would allow persuasion deception or Let me do persuasion, please Not with advantage. Um, no, okay, uh 16 though. She goes Those aren't my favorite type of flower, but I appreciate the effort. Hard to please. Oh, sorry. Could I have taken any action or any movement on that turn that I tried to blow my flute? Yeah, do you want to still do a dexave to see if you can move? Yeah, go ahead.

Make a dexave. Did you? I got a net 20 on that. Yeah, yeah, go ahead. Megah, Dexave, did you? I got a net 20 on that. Okay, so you roll with advantage. Well, that would be a 17. Okay, that is half speed. Okay, so I just can go, I can go 15 feet. Okay, so you go another 15 feet forward,

you're 155 feet away from her. Then she goes, I actually mixed up the order a little bit before. She goes on initiative 2015, 10 and 5. So she's gonna go twice in a row. So she once again, it's the rocks falling from above. She sings up into the rafters, rocks fall. Everybody go ahead and give me deck saving throws. Some of you can do it with advantage. Shout out to the two crew. Jesus, hard one. I have the burn these dice. I know, I'm getting bad rolls and this.

Yeah, I got 20, not net. 22, not net. Okay, anybody who beat in 19 passed? I didn't. Okay, 27 damage to the people who did not pass and half of that to the other people. So that is just 13. Everyone doing okay?

I'm not the look at your amulet in a minute. Okay. That is her again. She's going to belt out a different note. This time there is another flying bench. Beverly has gained her favor a little bit, so we'll say the flying bench goes at moonshine. Moonshine, go ahead and give me a deck saving throw

Seven seven that's not gonna do it moonshine you take 24 damage as a bench Cracks your head and sends you back another 10 feet That is back around a moonshine. I don't fucking know what to do, so I'm just gonna take out New Betsy and say, My lady, bard, you're making me hard. So I present to you this solemn tune. Hell yeah, dude.

And then I play New Betsy. Go ahead and give me a performance check. Woo! 21! 21. Yeah. You see she's taking a back for a second and she begins to enjoy your song and she begins singing along with you in sync.

My lady, pod, you're making me hard. So I present to you as solemn to you. Um, everybody go ahead and give me insight checks as that happens. Ooh. 12. 17. Ooh, 12 as well. 17. Oh, 12 as well. Okay, Maveris, you notice that in the time that she is, well, all of you guys notice

this, you guys all notice that in the time that she is syncing with moonshine, the force stops, things stop blowing around the room. Hardly so long. Doesn't think come off of me, Does the bench come off of me? Oh yeah, the bench is not on you anymore. It flops down for a split second. And then when she's done singing this little duet with moonshine, she begins the fourth song up again.

Maveris, it occurs to you if she isn't singing this particular song, it seems like it wouldn't have this effect. That is her turn again. She goes from duetting with moonshine to then scatting about force. to then scatting about force. He bop-bop-bop-bop-bop. Boom. Force, force, force, force. And this time, there is a rug flies out at, it gets the only person who hasn't successfully at any point.

Flattered, her is hard one. A rug flies at you hard one. Go ahead and give me a dexterity saving check or else it's gonna wrap around you and restrain you. I rolled another five. Oh, oh, oh. I rolled another five. Oh, rug slips out from under one of the benches

and flies up and wrap rolls you up and you just roll into the corner and there's so much wind and you just keep bashing against the side. Thank you for this rug hug. Ha, ha, ha, ha. And that is actually your turn. Cool.

So you are in a rug. You need to make a strange turn to get out of the rug. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Still learning a new body. That's a 20, like a 27 to get out of the rug. Bur's still learning his new body. That's like a 27- Are you burst from the rug? He learned it. Hey, are you taking requests?

I hold up my solo cup. And I ask, do you know any kid cobalt? Hard one, go ahead and give me a persuasion check with advantage. 19. Oh wait, actually 21. 21? Yes. Hard one.

Finish her. You have just been restrained by a rug. Throne up against this wall, you burst from the rug, pull out the solo cop, request some kid cobalt, and you see she looks across the room at you, and she goes, well, of course I know every song in the land. Cross your bit, little bit. Blow it up, take it, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Johnny's so good. We don't support that. I do not support Johnny junk. You guys all begin singing together in sync.

And you guys see that the least likely person of all kind of figured it out, you had to get her to sing a different song. She was singing the song of force, throwing you guys up against the wall. She starts singing the famous kid Go Bald Song, a pursuit of dragon eggs. Would you guys?

Oh my no pursuit of dragon eggs, and I know everything is serving, always gonna be dragons. You see that everything begins flying back into place. The table starts setting themselves. The candle lobbyers set themselves right. The candles go back on the tables. Everything lights back up. You see the chandeliers go back and start floating over the tables again. The various banners align themselves.

And then you see the banners change back to the various schools. And the other teams appear again as well as the masters on stage. You guys look around and see that half of the teams are missing. Is Team Worm there? Is Team Worm there? The worms are there.

You see, they hold up their mugs and a bunch of worms fall out and they look at you guys and they go Oh yeah, yeah, everyone else starts booing Yeah, you hear behind you Ren goes sucks Shit that I make this thing here to Mavericks the stars ball mean it to you to be honest never seen this Yeah, they're from like a far off. I don't know what that is at all But you guys look around it. So I said it cool. Just like drunk aliens. It's fun. You guys look up on the stage.

You see Lucana's looks super relieved to see that you guys have made it to the next one. I will get dead. He winks back. He looks super scared. And he's just like, thanks for the DNA, huh? tries to kind of maintain an impartial face, but you see he's smiling.

You guys look around and a lot of the other hard-ass teams are still here. The Glade Home Royals and Ren are behind you. You hear like light-chuckling. Oh, I didn't expect to see you here. Well, I'm fucking here, man. Do you want to go outside? Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, Start from off. Sucks, right? Right my half-elf friend? Oh-ha-ha. They do suck.

Oh-ha. That is a good joke. You stole it from me. Now, where's the funny thing you said? As far as... Yeah, you see, but the other elves at the table go, ren invented that joke. Fuck. I hate that we have parallel thinking. Um, but you guys look around.

You size up the rest of the competition, you see 16 teams left, and that's where we'll end our session. I want to fuck up. Star Spawn. Star Spawn. Star Spawn. Now, in the short rest today, we'll hear the long backstory of the Star Spawn team. Drink worms, be worms.

What would you need to know? Drink worms, be worms, be worms. We'll the next episode just be we all roll star spawn characters. Ah. Ah. And then just play that team. It's like a HBO show where you just suddenly

have like a whole arc about just what's their lifeline? Yeah. So we guys, thank you guys so much for listening. You can listen to our short rest, our after show, over on patreon.com slash nadpod. That's n-a-d-d-p-o-d. Don't see. Oh my.

Oh, okay. Guys, we got a bunch of shows coming up, going over to nadpod.com slash live, to get your tickets. We're gonna be in Atlanta on September 10th. Crit, Atlanta. In Philly, on September 11th. We're gonna be in New York on September 10th. Crit, Lanta. In Philly, on September 11th. We're gonna be in New York on September 12th.

New York, Critty. Crit, York City. Oh, wait, what was that up? To York, Critty. Oh, that's really good. That's actually good. Shit, okay. No, we're actually playing now.

We're gonna be in Boston on September 13th. What'd you got? Okay, hold on one second. I have just looking at my sheet real quick. Quips on there. I was trying to see anything that I have. I've got, oh, fuck it. I'm sorry, we're gonna have to edit out this 20 minutes.

Jake, he was 40. And we're gonna be in Boston on September 13th and we're gonna come in and we're gonna be in Pittsburgh baby. I'm sorry for a good. Good. Good guys we have some other stuff to plug. I guess right now, unsleeping cities and drop out the Ricky Matt Zooey

Ricky Matt Zooey, the firefighter paladin I love paladin I love you Murphy and Emily Yeah Watch that and then I think Sometime in August, the second episode of Adam Runes everything I wrote that Emily is in is scary Ooh, how nice

Synergy. We got to watch your TV, sign up to drop out, and watch Unsleeping City. Our new Dimension 20 season, it's very funny. Call the way you got to plug. Ooh, I would like to plug our PO box. I've been bad about checking it of late, but I went there and I have a bunch of stuff to plug

Frankie H sent us some character specific dice bags. Oh Tiny paintings. I cannot express how much I love my new dice bag Yeah, and I literally had it on my to-do list because I went to RTX. I got all these new dice I was like I need to get a new dice bag now. I have one the insides of the dice bag I've like fun patterns on them. Amazing. The painting is a tiny little canvas painting. There's a mo painting. There's a mo painting. There's a don't sing yet painting.

Very appropriate. Super cool. I got a cat bag. Yeah. I love cats. It's a secret cat bag goes on the inside is where the cats are. Hell yeah.

You can try at Etsy Shop Larkin Company if you would like to buy some of Frankie's stuff. Jacqueline and Brian sent us a beautiful wedding invite in a very nice note in addition Thank you in return. We set them our RSVP. We will be there in Indiana Zach O'Yama guaranteed will be there I we all get a plus one right? Absolutely. I have a couple of friends We have various complicated dietary restrictions. We will be making some requests for your DJ.

Just some extra 10 people to your wedding. That's good. Is that your question? Instead of like salad or soup, he just wants another entree. Another one. Give me two entree. I don't need that other.

He's allergic to, he's allergic to aiming. That's not a main course. We're gonna do a live session of NAD pod instead of you having a DJ or music. Cora, you sent us a sweet note and some fun character dice bags as well. They sent us one where moonshine's bag had a little pocket on it. It's really cute.

Oh, so cute. Oh, and the illustrations of the band of boobs as kids books. Oh, that was really, really fun. We also had a Brian. A call lightning. I was. Brian H sent us a nice letters of correspondence. Jeremy R sent us a crick water recipe.

We got to get into that. Hell yeah. I love it. It's a piece of paper, but Neil P sent us a nice note written on a possum card. Yeah, it was really sweet. And then finally, Haley, AKA Trilie the cray-fay, and fam sent us this amazing custom dice box.

Yeah, it's like a DM screen dice box, it's nuts. But you can roll, it has two segments atop it, and you can either roll like one churns out your dice to you and the other churns it out in front of the screen. Yeah. Oh, that is very cool. It's really awesome. We'll play it.

We'll play it with it before we do. It straight up smells amazing. It smells amazing. The amount of times Jake yesterday was like, oh, the smell's so good. I'll show you, man. It smells like it. It looks like something that like if Amish people played D&D

and maybe they do, they could use this dice box. They definitely could. We will use a very little amount of electricity here. Yeah. That is fun because we're making a podcast. You know we have to. Anyway, it's standards. Christopher Crouch, crouch.art on Insta is the person that made that actual dice box. So if you'd like to buy one of these school dice box screens, you can do that. If you would like to send us stuff, you can do it at 1920 Hillhurst Avenue, number 222, Los Piles, California, 90027.

Zach, I'm looking at you, please send us a mail. Okay, mail it, guys. I guess I have some gifts on me, but a mail on it. Please mail them. Jakey, anything plugged? Just that I finally thought of a Massachusetts pun. Oh, what is it?

Massachusetts. Nice. Okay, what is it? Massachusetts? Nice. Okay, Boston, Massachusetts. That's really good. Oh my god. I like it. Yeah, we will go out. Oh, yeah, Massachusetts. The sad thing is how long it took like I thought of it really far into Cobb We'll talking about all that that stuff Maga then you add it like within, you know, just like a split second. Awesome, thank you.

You guys are so much for listening. Can I pull something else? Follow us on Twitter. At C's, Murphy's me, at call these, called well, Eddie Astro, Emily, at J-Gurts, is Jake and Zach, what do you want to hear? At Zach, O'Yama. At Zach, O'Yama is Zach, just with a C, those X.

That's great. He's a cool character. Or like he is in my phone, Zic. Z-I-Z. Z-Z. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Zic. Z We are the youth of the nation, we are we are the youth of the nation. Hello friends, Caldwell here and yes, it is time once more to shout out our benevolent Council of Elders. Let's get right to it. Brad D, the only Pebble Pop that isn't Craven. In fact Brad is so confident that even his impressive posture strikes fear in the heart of his cowardly cousins.

J-Loma 72, aka Steelbreaker, Hardwan's gymspiration, Hardwan is still insisting that he can squat his old weight, but J-Loma is doing a lot of lifting with the spot. Dylan B, a sword-reelting wizard surrounded by a floating army of blades at all times, also on a way too chatty group text with those same swords. Danny P, Bohumiya's resident artist, painted hardwons senior portrait at the dwarf finish, recently broke into those old, hallowed halls to update hardwons' ears. Spencer Caskbrew, patron elder of libations, ale maker to gods and heroes of Bohumia alike,

including Palore, who is the only being who can out drink Balfour on the Bud Heavies. Beardman Dan, the longest beard in all of Bohumia, also has the longest eyelashes, and when he looks at you, it pretty much just melts your heart. Scott D was also trapped in Glad Sword, but elected to stay in there when the widow took it over. Scott feels like a good landlord is really hard to come by.

Hermes W, the Bat King, also the Lat King for their super jacked lats. Spartas, an orc doctor, or orcter for short, and yes, Spartas went to seven years of medical school for that borderline pun. Adam R, the R-rated assassin! Their next assassination will actually be rated PG-13 though, because it will happen

off-screen. Danielle the Dastardly Dame. Danielle is so dastardly, she's the one who killed the elf that hard one is now inhabiting. So actually, thanks Danielle. You see, aka, Howdor Frostback, MVP of the Giant Wars, crewed on the SS Stormboard and fought alongside Elias and Red. But definitely took Lydia's side in the hole, stay here and die debate. Very smart, you. Daniel U, aka Multifor, the Mini-Face Magician. Daniel's faces take turns napping, which means whoever is up always looks refreshed and well-rested.

Jordan DJ, legendary DJ of the realm. Erlin is currently blasting a Jordan remix of Dashboard Confessional Songs. Feel that. Jeffrey S. Lord of the Fjord, Born of the Sword, and the oft-sport. That's right, Jeffrey can report spores with the boobs anytime they want. Cutter W, a high-off, dandy-turned-cricked architect. Currently working on a beautiful birdhouse for Kaka, commissioned by his loving owner, Hard One Sure Food. Skeptical. John S, aka Shuberthemushroom, was actually the one who spored Jeffrey S. Wow. Ryan M, Hard One's Ram, who was turned into a Rampire when Hard one bit him. Ryan is incredibly grateful for his newly-son life because Ryan loves blood. Again, this seems very idealistic. Elena C. A Goliath Wizard who has sewn together four wizard robes and still only has

a robe that goes down to their knees. Elena Staff is also a full-on tree. Michael McD. Head mixologist at the Blue Manna Inn. Now that the chosen have taken over, Michael has been exclusively making white russians without the alcohol. So, milk. Andrew M. Old Cobb's newest drinking buddy, also opening for Cobb in the comedy tavern circuit. They keep the drinking heavy and the comedy, light.

Victor T. Bowneore's boy, whose loving dad was ripped from his family and transported to another world. Victor does miss his dad, but sometimes you gotta just say, Advita saying, to the things you love the most. Just an eye, an iron dwarf was taking a much needed vacation in the Feywild. Though Justin IS an iron robot, they are truly enjoying taking in the foliage at the Autumn Court. Jacob C. holds the high record in Bohumia on the famous snake game that was included in

many early versions of personal speaking stones. Elena M., a gnome who actually hates tricks and very rarely laughs. That said, sometimes a very esoteric galator on Tribune Cartoon will make them utter a small t-hee. Mick Pucks, the amazing code master who programmed our website. Also set up sonos on the SS Stormborn, but no one can figure it out and the solo cup deaf works, so they're sticking with that. Erlin Kathleen L, we're at a house next door when moonshine yelled, hey mom and dad,

and we're super scared because they also have a secret adult child. Jive G, kid co Cobalt's strongest Rody. Jive is so reliable they are often tasked with carrying Kid Cobalt himself. Jostritch the Jock Ostritch. Jostritch secretly dreams of performing in school plays, but their parents are making them play football. Follow your heart Jostritch. Demiol R. Ram Daniels evil twin.

Actually though, these Rams are triplets and they have a very middle of the road sibling named Darniel. Wow! Jennifer V has a V even more vicious than Cubs. Like actually a venomous V that makes you say F because you wish your abdomen could look like that. Destin C, the only person who knows where Alonus is currently hiding and they'll never tell anyone unless you pay them 5 gold. Wait that's not that much. Too late! Devin B, the Bodega Lord, fiercest their Velona, brave as their rye bread, shredded as their

cheese. Sergio Salazar Salaman Sakuraiya Sdisakwani, Seventh of his name, a sexy Peruvian snake folk with sweet snake patterns on his skin. Sergio once performed a highly illegal sexy dance, but was able to charm his way out of the fine with his bodacious moves. Michael L, hoping to bank off the success of Ulfgar goes punch, Michael recently wrote Balnor goes bag, and it is just absolutely tanking. Sam H. Alonis's dealer, Sam supplies Alonis with arcane, hill home hash, and of course, pizza flavored combos. Traylee, the cray-fay who loves Ray!

Romano, that is. Traylee is the number one fan of Bohumia's favorite sitcom Everybody Loves Ray of Frost. Aaron G. Master of the Banishments Bell. Doesn't have to work out because they just banished their love handles to keep that V vicious. Smart. Jory S. A jacked wizard cast in large person on themselves five days a week. Monday is in large chest day, Tuesday is in large arms, Wednesday is for legs, and so

on. Alacard, a reverse Dracula. Alacard mercifully revived Ryan the Ram after he was viciously ripped apart by Hard One. Thank you Alacard. Baby Dock, the only doctor to ever perform their own C-section. It was all done in a PlaySchool Playhouse and honestly it was horrifying. Atm H, the fastest wharf in all of Bohumia, which is to say, not very fast. Ryan, Hard One's Ram, after being revivified by Alicard, Ryan has a new

lease on life and thus will not be going near hard one anytime soon. Big Buck, pregnant out moonshines Elkin Baby, Big Buck wanders the Feywild looking for their long lost inexplicably pregnant mom. Richard X Machina, introduce the Crick-2 Fire. That's right, they only got that shit like 5 years ago. Winters were tough. Troy McSee, a chosen bad boy who, get this, drinks chocolate milk. Cannibalistic Cthulhu, an elder cracker that raised the juvenile crack and the boobs killed in Shadowfell.

It's a parent's worst nightmare, knowing that their child got wamped. Sam L. A yard barred! Sam will just show up in your yard, start singing songs, and expect to get paid. Dom R. A clockwork assistant who has learned the power to love. Working that is, either that or they were just programmed to be efficient. Josh S. The revived cyborg version of Josh the Cobald. Josh faced his fears and returned to the swamp that killed him once, only to be brutally electrocuted when the water hit his electric parts.

Ouch! Blitzbreak Demetri, owner of Dwarggers Big Borgher, try the steaming rat shit fries! They're fucking disgusting! Caleb Storm, cut bearer in cord's grade hall! It's not easy getting a god drunk, and it's especially not easy carrying a 10,000 pound Titan up the stairs when he blacks out, but Caleb's got this. Nicholas C has started every single movie ever made in Bohemia. That includes adult films and family movies.

Nicholas has a range that is frankly not okay. Mike H. The strongest pixie in all of the Feywild. Their punches nearly leave a bruise. Kevin S. A frost-wend dwarf who got lost in the frigid north and was captured by a Yeti. Someone help out Kevin please. Gosh! Matthew E. Part of a werewolf sled dog team that is way too ferocious to be practical. But objectively, Rad is hell. Samuel B, the scribe who pinned the pack to the gods during the age of the first people, and also the owner of the first ever Bohumi in Ruby Tuesdays.

Till for G, author of the hit children's book and movie, Ulfgar goes punch. Looking to acquire the rights to Balnor goes bag, but plans on doing a lot of rewriting during the scripting phase. Guardian of Light, Zach H, Bohumius only keyblade wielder, the only person in Bohumiya that knows Scott Master Dinnies' secret identity, Mickey Mouse. Ho ho, couldn't have seen that one coming! Curtis S. Accidentally invented pro wrestling down at the creek when they fell off a ladder and landed on their friend who smashed through a table. It was Sick As Hell! Colton B, the star player and a Bohumi and football league where every player is in full armor and wields a warhammer.

Somehow, still safer than the NFL. Yens Christian T, a Trinstagram star who just DM'd Onyx Classico account to see if she wants to collab on a homemade slime challenge. Gage M, the last green teen left and go later on, really earning their solitude patch. Aaron C, the tiefling barber who styles Maversa's horns. Montana Monarch, the regent of a tiny village in Bohumia called Montana, that is idyllic but unfortunately has no professional sports teams. Bummer.

L&D, the fiercest woman in Bohumia, once won the Wizard Tournament through sheer muscle alone. TJM, the gnome barbarian, takes the leather armor off their fallen foes and puts it through the wash so it shrinks to fit their small body. RPKB, R2D2's less helpful cousin, best friends with Keechchain and does a spot on vocal impression of him. I'd like to see you try. Taylor S. aka Trast the Traveler has been to every FH and execution brunch. Anime intellect doesn't know anything about wizard's tournaments but loves a good tune

in exam. Who doesn't? Zolo Dollo, the first astronaut to step foot on the Blood Moon. That's right, Shadowfell's got a publicly funded space program now. Joshua C, a carnivorous barbarian who gets so strong by exclusively eating the meat of awakened animals. Wow. Larissa J, a monk whose key points recharge after a short or long breath. Damn Larissa, that well never runs dry. Dylan CM, the wannabe DM. Dylan's NPCs are so likable, their adventurers won't let them leave,

and they're currently traveling in a party of 25. Oh no! Kelvin Noodles, the pasta elemental, mortal enemies with the macaroni-jabroni. B Money, Balnor's hip-hop alter ego. You wouldn't guess it from Balnor's dorky demeanor, but be money emcees a lot of wet t-shirt contests. Too many, in fact.

Andrew A. The second longest beard in all of Bohemia. Jay, former owner of the graphics scroll shop in Hill Home, business has been struggling ever since Beverly left to adventure. Alas. Heartless Master, currently filming a crick-miss movie for the Hallmark channel, where they go back to their hometown and rediscover their heart. C.C.Lulu, owner of the crick's beloved yoga attire empire, Lulu Yellow Lime. The main hurdle for business has been convincing the crick-voke to wear clothing.

Paul B. Akarat's assistant, in charge of sponge bathing all the hollow bodies after Akarat uses them. Oof. Barnes and Ador. The strongest barn in all of Bohemia. Also a great wedding venue. Shane M. Adorf who runs the Iron Deep Iron Depot. Not to be confused with Iron Warehouse or Iron Headquarters. Iron Sales is a pretty competitive business in Iron Deep. Believe it or not. Yasmeen aka the Yasmeenian Devil, despite their name, they're not evil, just a badass skateboarder. Hell yeah. Trigger Happy, Olcobs, Ancestor, and the original Crick Gunslinger.

Also taught Dead Eye everything he knows, but with water guns. Eric G. Specializes in Home Repair for magically conjured huts and mansions. Jackalope Audity, an animal so strange, moonshine hasn't figured out a way to wild shape into them yet. Zach C, one of the water elementals actual children who truly resents the fact that moonshine keeps claiming to be their sister. Aiden R, the bossy genossi who is feeling saucy, skipped the thin crust, Aiden's going deep dish tonight.

Jeremy R, the bartending assassin for the SS Stormborn. Don't piss Jeremy off or they'll go full coyote ugly, which is what they call it when their pet coyote kills everyone sitting at the bar. L.E.K., an assassin named Wet Willie. Contrary to their name, they won't actually wet Willie you until AFTER they've killed you. Luke H. An Esri-Scientist working on a renewable form of green energy. Luke's pretty tired of all these evil scientists giving the Esri-Scientific community a bad name. Ritterin, Kakka's new master. They say crows are the only animal capable of holding grudges, but Ritterin will never know if that's true because they love Kaka more than life itself. I'm hopeless, a down on their luck adventurer.

The last 10 treasure chests they opened turned out to be mimics. Chinna Poplas, 11 times the charm. Timmy R, a celestial beer smith who crafted a bud-heavy, so rich and full-bodied, Bounder was only able to drink 9 before falling asleep in a chair. Alex M., the only person in Bahumia capable of correctly pronouncing Lucana's last name. Cassandra MHP, aka Cassandra Max HP. Cassandra's favorite meal is Kraken Inc. Pasta. Also, the Pasta is made from incredibly poisonous, still living snakes. Cody John H., the first Crick-Earth to spike Glade Homes in Chanted River Mode.

The first, but definitely not the last. That mode straight up flammable now. Aaron RS. A Geo Mancer that specializes in white collar prison gyms for demigods and demons who have committed tax fraud. Lucas B. A warrior who fights with a four-pronged trident. Lucas spends most of their day stabbing people that point out that it has won too many prongs.

Ruben A, caretaker and lifeguard for Frostwin's Royal Hot Tubbs. Ruben has saved many a daddy from drowning after won too many bros. Jordan L, the greatest tuba player in Bahumia. Jordan recently took a page from Ol' Cobb's playbook and now uses their tuba to fire bullets. They also do an extra D6 of damage on account of how spitty they are. Laura S, a demonic lord who entered into a warlocked pack with himself. A move that's technically not illegal, but can tear holes in the fabric of reality and as such is somewhat frowned upon.

J. Parker, the first player to hit a so-so sick trick playing the giant shredder game at Smuggler's Bounty, was later found dead after accidentally drinking their cocktails decorative scorpion. Austin C, the Jester Mage, a sorcerer who imbues items with wild magic and wreaks havoc on the world. Austin always takes up two spots when they park and is currently being hunted by Th Aula and Akira at a like.

Austin M. aka the butcher known as Bone Saw, the only person in Aula Bahumia who knows where the meat in a Dwarggar's big borger actually comes from. Just a pissed off trist aka Tuchit saves money on manicures by jamming their tree fingers directly into a pencil sharpener. Kaley Elise, the honey queen with a heart of gold. Kaley is one of the only humans in the world to have been presented with a do not sting card by the queen of all bees. Dave J. AKA Bell in the Bard, a traveling bar that follows the band of boobs around singing

the tales of their exploits, currently playing white noise melodies to help Scoutmaster Diny get a good night's sleep. Kevin, a traveling dog omancer giving out doggies. If you're a necromancer with an army of skeletons, I'd suggest taking a wide birth. Devon W, an unseen servant that accidentally fell into a pile of glitter and is now Bohumi has first extremely easily seen servant. Chris H, Bohumias only hacker. Chris alters the magical spells programmed into items by literally hacking at their ruins

with an axe, and yes they wear fingerless gloves while they do it. Genoa B. Keeper of the Crick equivalent of the thinking cap, which is a pair of cut off jeans, known as the dummy jorts. Nick S. aka Old Crick Nick, the strangest guy at the Crick, lives on the outskirts of town with their pet rat. Nick doesn't have any brother cousins, sister aunts, or even a single baby grandpa, a truly odd fellow.

Sam H. The world's worst sky pirate. Every day, Sam climbs the tallest tree they can find and throws rocks at airships. It's not a great plan, but it only needs to work once, and then Sam is set. Quinn G. Erdan's bird-watching rival saw over seven different birds yesterday, which has got Erdan absolutely sweating. Jared E. Uncle Red's therapist. Each meeting is just an hour of red telling Jared new reasons that their life sucks. Doobie-Ash-Tray, Alonus' personal ash-tray, is capable of interpreting the way the ash falls

to determine the course of history and can also speed dial dominoes. That's nifty. Brian, Pindergast's former roommate, got super pissed when they found out Pindergast was just storing dishes inside his soul sword instead of actually washing them. Doc Alpha, the drunk monk, an enlightened drunken master water genazi. After a big night out, Doc always takes him out of the villa and drinks a big glass of himself before going to bed. Her Majesty Claudette, a normal citizen in Gladeholm.

This is just how every elf in the city is named. Get used to it. Carburo Chapel Hill FPV, known as the Breaker of Chains, less because of their involvement in slave rebellions and mostly due to their sick set of wire-cutting pliers. Persephone, a beast master who can control any animal other than ferrets. For some reason they just can't get a handle on those little guys. Keep trying, Persephone. Prince of Ravens, rightful air to the Raven throne. A massive chair made of thousands of shiny things that the Raven King found on the street. Joseph M. the Half-Work Bard, ish.

Joseph attended Bohumi's Bard College of Valor, but flunked out because of bad grades. Now Joseph works as an airship gas station attendant and plays the loot in his mom's basement. Reese NS, an automaton butler, they can shine a shoe in two seconds flat, and the right arm is a gun that fires Konyak. Basically a luxury model of keychain, Blavin is very jealous. Jackie runs the vacation Bible summer school in Galatoron. This year's theme is submit or be blinded by the holy light of our master and also pirates. Well, that's all our shout outs, thank you all so much for listening and for pledging

your support. We hope you have a great week and we'll see you soon. Bye! you