Not Another D&D Podcast - Ep. 74: Highprince of Hell (Mage Madness with Zac Oyama)

Episode Date: August 23, 2019

The Band of Boobs take on the Nine Hells in a fight for the Thinking Cap! Moonshine and Hardwon become action heroes, Beverly has a bitter reunion, and Mavris is officially named captain. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.Music/Sound Effects include:"Crackling Fire" by sagetyrtle at Freesound.org."Gypsy Violin Variation" by Howard Geisel at Freesound.org."A Wizard Tournament" by Emily Axford."Unknown Tome" by Emily Axford."A Tale's End" by Emily Axford. "Lucanus Aer'Tea" by Emily Axford. "Snake Fight" by Emily Axford. "A Sign From Melora" by Emily Axford. "Sea Beast" by Emily Axford. "Shadowfell Sneak" by Emily Axford. "The Valiant Ol' Cobb" by Emily Axford. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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so be sure to use the code PAPA to get your discount 100% free shipping and get it fast with rush processing. Code P-A-W-P-A-W. Goodbye, Sweeties. Hey guys, it's Murph. A couple announcements up top first. We are going to be taking a break from the Bohumia campaign starting in two weeks. So on Thursday, September 5th, and Thursday, September 12th,

we will be releasing new Trinnyvale episodes. On Thursday, September 19th, we will be posting one of the live shows from our September tour. I need a little time to prepare for the last quarter of the campaign, but we will still be producing plenty of content in the meantime. Just to be clear, that means that this week and next week will be Bahumia, then three weeks of Trinnyvale and live shows, then back to Bahumia.

If you want to see the band of boobs during our break, come to one of our live shows. There are still plenty of tickets left in Atlanta, September 10th, New York on September 12th, and Boston on September 13th, you can get tickets at nadpod.com slash live on with the show. Welcome to the campaign after the campaign. This is not another D&D podcast. Welcome back to Bahumia everyone. Oh, bahumia. Bahumia. I'm your dungeon master, Brian Murphy, joined by Jake Hurwitz.

Hard one, sure foot. Emily Axford. Moonshine Sime and badass, lasin' the thingin' cap. Nice. And of course, called Waltaner. Beverly Togold the fifth. Akarats Nightmare. And yes, night is spelled with a K.

Hell yeah. And of course, we've got our returning guest, Zachoyama. Hello, Maveris Theon Schooled. Having a blast while disintegrating some ass. Yay. And skipping class. And skipping class, isn't it? Ooh. Plus that ass and skipping class and skipping class.

Oh, plus that ass. No class. But for half damage, of course, that means farting, right? Yes. Plasting ass. All right. You better hope. Very good.

Yeah. Okay, guys, let's do a little recap. Last week, you guys began the final round of the Glade Home Wizard tournament, joining three other teams in a free-for-all for possession of the thinking cap the prized relic of the elves the masters summoned a guardian to kick off the round inserting a giant goat fiend into the mix and a healthy dose of chaos during the melee the nomish wizard snuck off and found her way to the secret basement containing the all-caster a powerful apparatus that could allow someone to cast a spell on the entire city, hard one and Ren rushed down to stop her.

While the rest of the boobs, the elves, and the Necromancer team did battle with the goat-feind, Munchine scuffled with one of the Necromancer's death knights for possession of the thinking cap early on, and he revealed himself to be aquerot in disguise on a mission to win the crown for the Nine Hells. With help from Maveris, Munchan was able to wrestle the crown away from them, Donnet and take the throne, the fiend tried its damnedest to kill Munchan with powerward kill, but Maveris countered every attempt. Meanwhile, hard one confronted the nomish ma Mage who introduced herself as Lilith Latrix

and revealed that she was trying to destroy the city in service of the Goddess. Using the spell time-stop, she was able to get past Hardwon and in Arcane Barrier to cast a spell magic on the entire city. However, since Hardwon cornered her and forced her to use her only 9th level spell, her dis spell wasn't as potent and only just spelled half of the city's levitation. You began to feel the castle lurch forward, but before a compliment, hard one killed the gnome and ran cast levitate on the city. As the flying island city rocked unsteady in the air, Maveris rushed downstairs to help.

Meanwhile, Beverly confronted Akarot and was doing well until a well-timed smite-slash critical hit combo sent him flying unconscious from the top of the Great Hall to the floor below. Thinking quickly, Moonshine grabbed Beverly and casted Stone shape, turning the ground below them into a slide to the secret basement so they could join the rest of their party. Beverly was healed as Maveris cast a more powerful levitate spell on the city further stabilizing it. And that's where we are.

Now, the... Lot happened. Yeah, wow. The least fun slide I've ever been on. I thought it was pretty fun. I thought it was pretty fun. It's still pretty fun. You're a toboggan.

That's kind of cool. Yeah. There's a lot of great slides in Hill Home. You didn't see them because they were on fire. All right, maybe be grateful for the slide and that saved your life. What's a slide? Is that like when you don't like what's a slide? What's a slide? You never heard of a slide or never seen it. A slide? Is that like when you like make a lot of money one year and

only make kind of a lot of money the next year and your money kind of slides down. I use handy- handy- handy to pick pocket him. Oh, speaking of pick pocketing, can we look at that gnome's body? Ooh. Yeah, yeah. Her name was Lilith Latrix. She was trying to do something in service of the yalla. You go over to her body and yeah, she has this magical cloak on her that has like a starry sky on it and the stars twinkle you see she also has a necklace that has the sword of the chosen on it

uh, Ryn? yeah, not fucking with you right now truth right now oh my god, I thought we were friends yeah, I mean yeah, we're friends. Sure, yeah. Can you identify those things? Oh, of course I can. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh casts identify. So this robe is called the robe of the arch-may-jai. When you wear it, you gain the following benefits.

If you aren't wearing armor, your base armor class is 15 plus your deck-stairing modifier. Just quite a bit. Oh, that's why. You have advantage on saving throws against spells and other magical effects. Your spell save DC and spell attack bonus each increase by two.

So it's pretty damn good. Ren relays all of that to you in a super pretentious way and he goes, you know what? I actually might take this slammer in the face. Oh. Handy, Andy got a 30 to stealth to pick pocket, Ren. You should definitely take the cloak. Okay, I'm gonna, I'll really present to you

take from Ren, but it looks like it's a nice funny. Okay, I'm gonna roll a really preserve to take from red but it looks he gets a nice funny I'm gonna roll a detent and that's how many platinum he just has in his pocket. Oh, he's so rich Seven platinum Wow Our fortune grows, Ren you don't deserve the cloak. Why I save the city. Oh, oh Ren I killed the gnome. This is my cloak Wow, a little fair is fair. Oh, it's like a beach towel on you Yeah, it's sort of like a wearing a bib backwards Here maverus this is yours. No, no, I have a sick cloak already. I uh, oh yeah I have a pretty I

Hasn't really come into play very much right now, but I already have a pretty cool cloak so Fully up for grabs except for Rin. I'll wear a cloak Moonshine this is your clue We unless Balnor wants it. I got a cap in a cloak. I'm turning into a damn high LV here Yeah, you throw the cloak on and Moonshine looks extremely regal right now. Oh wow.

I cross-rate. Whoa. moonshine hertia. Don't you get this, I've been okay, I'm hyphenatin. Dirtyest of the clean. Cleanest of the dirty. So just to be clear again on the rules of the tournament, so you guys need to sit on the headmaster's throne for one full minute while holding the thinking cap.

So right now you guys have the thinking cap and Akarad has the throne. His team is still upstairs. They're presumably in the great hall up there. Can I do like a sense evil to see if I can ping them and see if they're still in the great hall? Uh, sure. Yeah, go ahead and I guess make like a perception check.

Shout out to the two crew. Hmm there in Gladeholm I bet they're up there. I bet they're just I bet they're just circling the throne. Yeah, this guy's gone right like we it's not like we see like a whole No, it's presumably it goes away really quick or did you dismiss it? Um, yeah. I would dismiss it. Yeah, yeah, okay. Snap it away. Yeah. So you see, also down here with you is Cooixis, who's super like bloody and hurt and has raspy breath. I grit my hammer. All right. There's only one noble thing to do.

What are you doing? What are you gonna put this beast out of this misery? What? No! Time. What a happy time. Every animal you meet. I'm not even hungry. I'm not an animal. I'm older than all of you, I'm probably smarter than all of you.

I'm petting him, I'm giving him Chinese grudges. Thank you, this is how you treat an ancient beast. Are you allergic to potions of greater healing? Don't worry about me, you all have a much bigger fight ahead of you than I do. I'm not allowed to get involved in the tournament proper. I'm just down here protecting the all-caster. I'm thank you, by the way, Maveris for saving the city. Thank you, hard one for saving the city. What about me?

Yes, thank you, Ren. Unfortunately, Ren really was instrumental in saving the city. Yeah. You guys do feel, right? So after Maverus cast into the levitate, now it's just this weird thing where everything appears to be levitating, but the entire castle is kind of rocking as if you're on like a boat. It's like the airship.

Yeah, it's like the airship, it's just this kind of like uneven thing. Oh, I don't like this one bit. I'm gonna freaking bar if we sit in this room longer What are we doing What is causing the creaking like if I cast stone shape into the orb would that then like heal the stone of the into the orb would that then like heal the stone of the of the building? You could certainly try that yeah. Yeah, I guess I'll go up to the emerald cylinder. Sweet. And cast stone shape and just imagine some nice sturdy walls and... Yeah, just like filling in the gaps that kind of cracked or like the cement and stuff that broke Yeah, let's back feeling okay, um go ahead and remember While you're wearing the thinking cap you have

proficiency in our conna go ahead and give me an arcana check. I help oh and do with advantage Rent take notes on this you little pissant Yeah, really um I Okay, as the leader of this team, I feel like we should be focusing on the other team upstairs. I do the ice man thing at him again. Whoa, what? Oh, I tell you, you're wearing a jersey,

you're not part of the team. Ooh, that's gonna be a 24. Thank you for the help once again, Mabras. Sweet, so yeah, you guys, Moonshine, you hold your hand out and you visualize kind of bringing the stone together and forming everything up, making everything strong again, filling in the gaps that cracked. And you guys watch as Moonshine does this,

she's wearing the starry cape, she's got this crown on. She looks, you're really seeing the high-elf side of her. Munchan, you look adorquable right now. I look up and hair gets in my face and I brush it on my face. It just looks like the new girl right now, your three roommates. I take out new Betsy and it's turned into a ukulele. You guys see the castle stops moving. Settles in place.

And then a real quick cast guidance. Which is getting I don't. I almost got in trouble with my dad when I did that. You see, a quick sis is is just like kind of drifting off as he's like bleeding heavily and he wakes up for a second and he goes, everyone calm down with casting it. No one's allowed back there. I only gave a day pass to one of you here.

Moonshine, take a day pass, but after that, everyone cut it out. Okay, okay, okay. You're a noble beast. Say the word and I'll give you a proud death. Don't kill me. Okay, okay. You're a noble beast. Say the word and I'll give you a proud death. Don't kill me. Okay, he bears his teeth at you. What do you want with this relationship?

I'm starting to like read more than you. Oh, oh, oh. That's the neatest thing anyone's ever sent to me. I'm just gonna put this out there right now. I'm pretty much useless right now. I've got two first level spells, one second level spell and three third level spells, and that's all.

We can do it, like I can do it, I can, but I might not be much help if we go into battle right now. They can't do shit without the thinking cap. We can, you can zealous trans. I can, I'll take a quick trans, you know, I transfer eight hours now. Yeah, I don't think I've had the pleasure of witnessing you trance yet.

Oh, I did last night. Yeah, you're a loud trance. I do a lot of thrashing while I trance. Yeah, did you have like a trance terror? I often do. See, Ren just fully doesn't get the joke. That sounds like sleeping. Oh, I'm not sleeping.

I gestured a Beverly to Neil behind, Ren. Oh, I'm asleep. I gesture to Beverly to kneel behind red. Oh, I absolutely prefer the table top. And I have nibbleness in front of large creatures. Beverly's go ahead and make an athletics check against it, Rem. Can I help with that? Sure. I guess Beverly would help.

I got a nine plus, yeah, plus two. He got a nine plus yeah plus two he got a five So you you tabletop I'm so hard he lands on his head and he just like rolls back Oh, what no harder than I meant. Hey, why don't you transfer a second? Nice I try for a really awkward high five with maveris I I try for a really awkward high five with Maveris. I give him as much as I can. It's sort of a low high five.

You gotta be careful. You know sometimes you hurt your wrists on those. Yeah. I definitely banged my wrist real quick. So we can take a break. You see, Coexis speaks up and he goes, there's nothing in the rules. There's nothing in the rules that say a dog can't play basketball. No, he goes, there's nothing explicitly in the rules that says you can't steal the thinking cap and take a break.

That is good strategy. There's a good chance that the other team doesn't know that you're down here, although somehow that gnome knew about this, but we know of the grave robbers. They must have passed along that information to the other ones. Likely, Lilith Littrix was a grave robber. Yeah, Crocs. What's your opinion? Am I okay to wear this dead gnome's cloak? Absolutely fuck her. Okay, just make sure.

She broke the rules down here. No one's allowed back here. Everyone in fact, it would make me feel a lot better. We could get out of this little hallway and go back into the main room. I'm not gonna get like seized with a necromantic lust. No, that's just a cool starry robe. Cool, awesome, dope, wow's just a cool starry robe. Cool, awesome dope.

Wow. Great robe, bad gnome. Is there anything that we want to do to like guard ourselves or? You guys see, you guys see Rand speaks up and he goes, um, as the leader of this team, I just want to make sure, um, and, you know, this is me kind of being a benevolent leader because normally get to the point right? Right. Okay. Well, the question is, do we have a better chance now with us diminished? Oh, oh, oh, oh, and also the other team diminished. Oh, oh, oh, or do we want to take a rest and then us with all our stuff, them with all their stuff. Uh-huh. That was actually pretty good point. Pretty strategic, yeah. I pants him.

Well, it's like, you, I'm not wearing pants. Uh-huh. I'm a tunic him. Yeah, tunic. He just grabbed. You just, yeah, he's broke. You tulip is tunic. That's where you flip the tunic upside down.

So it's like a flower coming out of his head. It's a great little athletic shorts under there. Yeah, you just like yank his robe up. Gross round, I saw your dick. Yeah, well, um, stop uproping me. You never been too ellipse? Come on. We don't goof around here. It's just so clear you're not the leader. I just don't understand why you keep thinking.

What do you mean? You're on a different team. Can I say any man you need to steal more from me? 17. Yeah. I'm gonna roll a D4 this time. He doesn't have that. But you mostly rock and blind.

You get another piece of blind though. Just to prove the point to drive the hammer further in, I fashioned a little C patch. I imagine I know how to make a patch on the fly. And I affix it to Mavericks's jersey. Oh my God. As you're walking towards Maveris, I stood perfectly straight and tall

and I shut my eyes proudly. No way deep in my heart that the sea was about to be so not to my chest. I whispered a hard one not this time. Oh nice Maveris, yeah. This one's just this one. This is your champion of me, I don't know. This is such an honor, thank you.

Absolutely. Sea Rinn. Yeah, no, literally sea. This is actually champion of me, I don't know. This is such an honor, thank you. Absolutely. See, Rin? Yeah, no, literally see. This is actually really, really, really smart. When we go and we fight those devils, they'll think that Maveris, who is another devil, objectively looking at him, he's got horns, oh, oh, oh, he's on the...

Oh, wow. Okay. Rin surprisingly makes a good point. I can't get any HP back. I'm not a hit dice. So I'm kind of stuck where I am, but I'm happy to like maybe read my book and try and read up on. If I take a four hour trance, all my spells will be back.

So I can burn all the chances we can. Even if that increases their chances, I think now that we're all together and now that we're unified, we're gonna be stronger than we ever were. Hell yeah. I prepare for the game. I think we should just go all out. I think we should do four hours. I think we gotta give ourselves all the chances we can.

Even if that increases their chances, I think now that we're all together, and now that we're unified, we're gonna be stronger than we ever were. Hell yeah. I prepare a trancing pad for moonshine and Maveris. Okay, prepare while you. Who built me? Oh, I trance. Behind you.

Do you trance? Yeah. All right, come over here. You can trance with me. My new friend. Wow. Hey, hard one. Can I talk to you for a second? One minute now verse I'm kidding bro. Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah, what up? I just feel like I'm feeling like a little threatened by this sort of I just like ever since you and Rin came down here

It just feels like a little bit like I don't know if that's like, you guys are the buds now or... Hey, Maris, look at that motherfucker. Oh, I'll never be his friend. When you're supposed to sit on the pad, I don't know what you're trying to do. What, I do a handstand. That's a... You do a handstand? I feel a lot better, thank you.

Alright, so we bro hugged. You got to's a, ah, yeah. You can stand? I feel a lot better, thank you. All right, so we bro hug. You got a trans like hard one, horizontally. That's the only way to trans. I'm planking into the dragon spell. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm 88. Okay, hey, Ren. So I'm giving you 88 and then Ren. Ren? I'm gonna heal Ren. Ren only needs four hours. Oh, he'll just heal out. All right. No one needs an extra 10. Okay, so I got great. Extra 10 hit points. No one needs it. I mean, great. Quixes? Quixes, I give Quixes 10. Thank you. No one needs it. I mean, quicksus.

Quicksus, I give quicksus 10. Thank you. It was kind of, I didn't want to ask, but I wasn't feeling great. Yeah, well, you know, what goes around comes around. Can I like help quicksus rub some bronze into his wounds? Sure. Thank you. I love the feeling of metal on my exposed flesh.

Oh, absolutely. I read about this in a book You use this as armor. Yeah, y'all just smelt it right on there. Right. Just put some boiling hot metal on me It seems like you're enjoying it your your foot is thumping up and down. Yes No one touched my horde while I was my way from it. Did they only to add more bronze to it? Oh I like you. I flick a platinum into it. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Quixis and say, like, this is also from me. We all got this platinum for you. Oh.

Okay. Thank you, brother. Hey, Ren. Ren, come on. Why don't you kick in a little platinum? I don't know what you're doing. Yeah, are you not as rich as our wise, elven friend here?

It's fine if you don't have any money to splash around. That's fine. No, but if you give away money, how do you stay rich? That why would I give the dragon my money? Oh, I'm right. Well, man, you were afraid I liked this guy. And yeah, I see it now. I really do.

No, I mean, he lives in a basement. What is he gonna do with it? He likes it. Easy. Easy. Easy. It's good to have stuff. You know what that's like? You got stuff?

I do. I have a lot of nice things. I'm Ren, I'm starting to name all of his nice things. It takes the rest of the four hours. So that's how he transes. He just gives off his Amazon wish list. If you were really rich, your wish list is your order history. That on a pillow.

Wow. That's so new money. So it's all money to make a wish list. Yeah, it's tacky. By thinking that it's fine to think about it. We grew up in the Dwarf and a Jedi and deep. We also had wishlist. Oh my God, you're a Dwarf and that's hilarious.

I had but him. To be fair, his father's name is Amazon. So that's what we think in the wishlist for. So while we're all kind of healing up and getting ready, I would like to go over to Maveris and to everyone but to Maveris mostly and I am holding my tome of Archfiends and Archdevils behind my back. And I'm like Maveris, I know that you don't like looking at books, but if you will allow me to teach you from this one, I think it will help us a lot in this fight.

books, but if you will allow me to teach you from this one, I think it will help us a lot in this fight. And then I pull out some chalk and I start writing equations and stuff on the wall of this underground area that we're in, detailing ways to defeat devils specifically all their weaknesses and stuff that I've learned from this book. Maveris is gripping his own thighs, sweating, staring at this. You know, as he should sit here, but every part of him wants to run away. Okay. Go ahead, Bev. Go ahead and give me a history check with advantage

because you got some time in here. You're looking at this book. You'll get something out of it no matter what. Woo, it's going to be a 23. Okay, so you know that these kind of lesser death night guys that were fighting the champions, they're not going to hit for nearly as much as Akarat, they only have a couple different smites that they can do lower level You know that they're pretty beefy though. They're kind of hard to kill. They've got

Medagaming wise like a lot of HP They're pretty heavily armored and Other than that they can take you know that They are basically like corrupted Humanoids so they can take like poison damage and stuff. They're not totally undead and then Akarat was not around when this book was written But you are able to glean some information about powerful death knights that essentially get some

Necrotic spells as if they're necromancers. He's basically just the opposite of you. You know? Okay. He's an anti-paladin essentially. He's me, but stronger. Right, yeah. Is he ticklish?

Is he ticklish? Yeah. It does say that many devils are ticklish. I'm not good to know. I turn my eyes to Maveris and see that he has been paying attention through this whole lecture. And I pull out from my sack three treats for him to choose from for being a good boy.

Wait a second, are you saying that I could have one of these? Yeah, you did a good job. You learned. Learning is fun. And you deserve a reward for it. Maveris is shook to his core as he looks at these what are the tree? Well, there's a sticky hand. Huh this one's like a little dinosaur And then there's the chattering teeth Mavris ask if you get to what what are the rules on taking more than one?

If I promise to do it later, Mavris take the sticky hand and then use it to grab another one. Can I check out that sticky hand? Yes, sure of course. All right, never say to stick hand and try to whip the dinosaur The dinosaur will of course you know learning is its own reward, but some people hey Nice ground I'm gonna take it hurry. I'd taped the sticky hand. I'm going for the teeth I have nothing left to teach you In a way I've taught you No, you get a prize

You give me the teeth back Wow, I didn't want these I've been trilliquist them. That's okay, bro. How are you doing, man? Oh, I have so much to teach you still. Bev, is there anything in your book about whether or not all them have resistance to fire damage? You would know that the, like a high prince of the nine

hells would definitely at least have resistance to fire damage. OK. But what about those other like corrupted humanoids? Bev, with that good of a role, you would know that they don't have resistance to fire damage. That's cool. Yep.

Akarot can skinny dip in a lake of fire, but his death knights cannot. That is what it says in the book right here. There's a skinny dipping table. Wow. Yeah. Creative grandfather. This book is lured.

It's incredibly graphic. My grandpa was a real good artist though. I'll say that. Maybe a little bit of a pervert too. Oh. The detail on this penis reading. These last three pages are obviously stuck together. Well, you know, it's been in the family for a while.

Can I go ahead and can we just say that my lecture on the nature of Archdelts is also my inspiring speech. Oh! No, give another one. What does that mean? What do we get? You get a plus 16. All's backup. This is the most fun my school has ever been, guys.

Quicks is goes hard to disagree. Quicks is no offense, but your job sucks. What's, no, I get to stay in a basement with my treasure. Can I do an insight check to see if Quixis secretly parties? Sure. That's a 17. A 17 Quixis is a cat. Quixis just sleeps all day and hangs out and he's fine being here.

He does not secretly have a sad life or anything. He's just, he's fine. Okay. He does not, he does not secretly have a sad life or anything, he's just, he's fine. Okay, to each their own, living his best life. I really like just kind of going to class and making fun of the stupid kids. You know the ones who have to like try and stuff? I mean those aren't the stupid, what do you mean?

You're a stupid kid. What? What? Did you go to like, did your parents like have special tutors for you and stuff? Yeah. Why would they not? Okay, never mind.

Right, I don't think there's any getting through to you. Yeah, I don't know if you're speaking a Crick-O-Flang, which is something right now, it just doesn't make much sense. I lining up all him. He dies. I know, here's where you are. While we're still chilling while we're doing our final preparations, you know I got to throw it up to my boy, Polore.

Sure. I dropped him on me. I fully prostrate. I do my trance, and I pray, and I say to Polore, hey big guy, I know that you're probably, you know, out surfing on the cosmic waves and the loud crash of the sea is drowning out my voice, but if you can hear me, anything you can give me would be great. Going out there for you, trying to get my dad back.

You're like my big dad in the sky, so I think you could identify with that. Just anything you can do, big help. I would like to piggyback off this moment to secretly cast stone skin on Bev, which gives him resistance to non-magical, bludgeoning piercing and flashing damage for an hour. It requires concentration though,

so I think I might do it on the thinking cap. Okay. And I figure I could do the roll down here and if it doesn't work out, then it will be in battle. Sure. Also, things like that aren't that bad to fizzle with the thinking cap, because then you would just cast it on yourself, and it's just a wasted spell, essentially. Yeah.

Um, Beth, go ahead and make a religion check, and we'll say with advantage, because Mewchine's kind of helping you. Ooh. Uh, natural 20. Ooh. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Really downplayed that, ooh.

This gets praying so hard. I do a full squat when I pray. Beb, as you pray to Polore, you don't exactly have a vision or anything, but it does feel like somebody is suggesting something to you in your mind like you instantly kind of go to this memory and you go to kind of the strategy you had when you fought Akira at the first time. You see you escape from the bones, you see two allies next to you, fighting against these knights, getting cut down as you run in anger

to face Acherot by yourself, and then losing. And you realize that is not how you're going to beat them. You're not going to beat them by yourself. I awake from my prayer and I say, you know, it's good to believe in the gods, but I think there's even something stronger and something even closer by that I need to believe in. But, sorry, no, I wasn't cast to spell on you. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,

Bring it in! Team Maveris! What? Team Ray! Oh! Hi. I pull his sash out of his robe. Oh!

You win that with it. Maverick puts his hand in. When a shop puts her hand in. Hard one puts his hand in. Quicksess puts a giant dragon paw in. How boss that's fucking dog. Sorry, sorry, I figured why not. It is two, three.

Maverick, pardon. Maverick, pardon. Okay, so I passed my wisdom thing. So now the thinking cap is concentrating on giving Bev Stone skin. Hell yeah, operation. Resistance, so you are stony little lad now. Operation Boulder Boy is go.

Oh, Operation Boulder Boy is go. Watch, look like they're paying off Bev. God, nasty makes me jealous. I punched the wall. I really underestimated this kid. Ha ha ha ha! Stoded aquerot. Yeah.

So I go over to Cooixus. Hey, Cooixus, how are those wounds doing? You okay, feel all right? Yeah, so I'll be fine after a bit, thank you. So I'm just wondering if there's a secret passage that leads to this room? Are there any other secret passages we could take to try and get a bit of a stealth advantage on Acarot?

Well, you get to this basement through one of the towers at the corner of the Great Hall. If you climb the stairs there, you can go upstairs into the classrooms. If you were to go directly above the Great Hall. You could perhaps use a spell to go through the floor or break something or the ceiling is very tall though. So you might you might do you might enter yourself at the same time. You can also go back up the way you came down with stone shape or something. Yeah, consider that I just feel like that might be more obvious.

Yeah, they might be expecting that. Yeah, they're definitely not expecting us to come from the ceiling. I kind of like that plan if we can't be right. But then we all fall and then we all take falling damage. I got to bring a feather fall. I got feather fall as well. I could cast levitate on us. Okay. That's good.

Yeah, that sounds good. Let's do that. Okay. So I won't even pass without Trace on us. We're just going straight up to that. Yeah. Should we go up? I guess why not? I'll cast pass without Trace because I can because I have it once a day. So just while we're getting up to that classroom, we all have a advantage on stealth rolls. Yeah, Quicksis nods. Not a bad idea. It is, you'll have to go up the tower to get there. Okay, yeah. All right, you ready? Ready, Ren?

Ready to drop in? I'm ready to be, oh, you know what? I'll cast Levitate on everyone if I get to be the leader. Oh, fine, fine. Oh, right, yes. You're in the leader. All right, team, Ren, let's go.

Oh, I want to, Ren, yeah. You have a lot to learn from Maveris, the unschooled. You are not anybody's friend, but you get to be part of the team. And I rip off both of his rope sleeves. Okay, I'm not gonna cast Levitate on this guy. I was big to it, God damn jersey. Oh, okay, I'm not used to having friends and things.

Who are those people on your team? The people I hired, I don't know. Oh, God. Yeah, I'm a man of candy and ice to go down. If you go to the market, there's only people who can't afford to buy things. Okay. It's so funny. I saw one of the sleeves back on.

That's gonna be a 28-stealth roll from handy-andy. This time he's only gonna get gold, four gold. Okay. Just hold onto those sleeves, hard one. All right, gang, let's go. You guys walk back over under the shoot, hit the ground 19 times, and you shoot back up into the stairwell,

into this tower. Guys, go ahead and give me... Stealth checks. 29. Wow. I also got 29. 31. 31.

Sweet. Let me see what Ren gets. Ren roads it for all of you. I'm just kidding. Ren got a 24. You guys are able to stealth up this winding staircase ever so quietly. And you actually pass a few doorways

that probably go like further into the castle because the Great Hall is so tall that the next floor above it probably isn't until like the fifth or the sixth story of it. Like it's pretty high up. So you guys go to the top of the tower here. And there's a wooden door there with like a iron ring. You guys sneak up, you pull it open.

And you see up here is not a proper classroom or anything. It looks like you guys would know from the history of Glade Home, or at least probably Beverly would know, and Maverick would maybe know if he paid attention at all. What's up? Maybe even Ren is telling you guys

in a super smug way, but this did used to be a royal castle. So you go up here and this is kind of the King's quarters. Like on top. So it's a little, it's like, it's well-capped but unused. Like things are a little dusty. It looks like people come up here and clean like quasi-often, but nobody really uses it. You see a bed that's kind of meticulously capped. You do see bookshelves and things like that, but nothing seems really used. Everything is in kind of like perfect condition

and there's like mirrors and stuff you're like a vanity and things like that. Maverous, I think it just, this is clearly where I should be sleeping, right? Yes, I was quite nervous. I was sitting in that classroom. Must be nice to be up here, right? I think go ahead and write your name on the bed.

Okay. Later, later. Later. Yeah, let's know what our name is on beds, what? We've got cross stitch on the pillow. Come on, Rin. So yeah, so you guys, yeah, and there are these beautiful big windows

that look out onto the sea because Glade Home is a floating city, that's like right over the West Coast of Bumia. So the castle kind of narrows as it gets taller. So this room is not nearly as big as the Great Hall, obviously, but you can walk to the one side of it, and Ren confirms for you that this would be over the Great Hall.

Cool, cool. I'm really good with directions. Oh, it's awesome, I guess. Yeah, my dad, Ren to the side is like an Arabian B1 time. Nice, cool. Yeah. As a activity everybody, I'm going to see him.

It cost a thousand platinum. That's wow, that seems like a great vacation. Yeah, we had to fire one of our housekeepers to do the, man, run, run. I just, I think if you just didn't say anything, that would be better. Yeah. It's hitting a point.

So you guys are all in these ancient Kings quarters above the Great Hall and Ren starts looking through his spell book and he goes, well, I'm actually not gonna be able to cast Levitate on all of you, but I can cast Fly, which is even better. Oh, but once I agree. Yeah, fuck yeah. On all of us? That's awesome, yeah, yeah, all of us that's awesome. Yeah Yeah, it's pretty hard. It's gonna be like a seventh level spell for me to do it on all of us But I can do it I drown out his chatter by loudly going fungal form Okay, so it's much I'm you going to fungal form I get one of hard ones old shirts and make it into a cape for myself

I definitely allow that to happen shirts and make it into a cape for myself. I definitely allow that to happen. I'm average just kinda undoes his robe. So they can have it like draping behind of my surprise. Oh yeah, that man style. Ren casts fly and everybody and you guys all begin floating, you guys all have until he loses

concentration, you have a flying speed of 60. Wow. Oh, thank is so cool. Thank you, Captain. We're in Dalin, Mortal Kombat. And you see, Ren goes, oh, should I just kind of wait up here? I wouldn't want to lose concentration. Seems more like the strategic thing is from the characters.

Yeah, I think so. Do we want to add him to the spores so we can get him if we need him? Yeah. All right. Bring him in, a hawk, a luge, and a- Yeah, that's right. Open your mouth, chest to speak to your mouth. And I anoint his Bring it in. A hawk, a luke, and that's the right. Open your mouth.

Chastis, speak to your mouth. And I anoint his head with it. Okay, this is normal. So yeah, for to work, we all have to spit on your forehead. Here, I'll go first. Everybody, lukees on, Ren. Look at it. I might grab a quick six if you don't mind.

You just get in the bed. Who's got depression? Well, I can concentrate, boy, nap. God, it's like a tall, dany, I hate it. Rin, the other part of this is that we're also your conscience now. So you're hearing us in your head. Fine, okay, I'll be ready to like run down the stairs

if you need me or something. Be nice to people regardless of their socio-economic class. But I'll jump out the window. Wait, I follow. Sweet, so you guys want to basically fly down outside the windows of the Great Hall? Yeah, hover outside the windows. Still team two. Yeah, yeah.

Go ahead and are you guys all going to the same window or are you going to different ones? I'll say that there are four very large windows on both sides of the room for the record pop-offs with So pop-offs also fly Do you want to do like two of us on the left side two of us on the right side? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, it's all different. I'll go right Okay, yeah, I'm gonna pop out go well. Okay. The boys got it in the last. Yeah. Okay.

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promo code pop-off at checkout. That's birddogs.com slash pop-off or promo code pop-off for a free Yeti-style tumbler. You won't want to take your bird dogs off, we promise you. Okay, that's it for me. Go team pants and enjoy the show You guys open windows in these Kings quarters and fly down Moonshine and Bev you guys get on the one side Maverson hard one you guys get on the other side this is kind of like stained glass So it's not the easiest to see through. It's like red and black and silver But everybody go ahead and give me,

first off, give me stealth checks. Fly with all choice. Nath 20, baby. Nath 20. Okay, I'm gonna say Moonshine's leading the way over there. You guys are so fucking stealthy. You guys just land perfectly. Moonshine even lands perfectly

and then just catches Bev. So he doesn't even make a sound when he hits the... Everyone, remember to add test. The stone, add to 28. Perfect, 24. Cool. Moonshine, thank you for catches. So you guys arrived down there outside the windows.

Everybody go ahead and give me perception checks. Is he looking? 20, not that. 11, 16. 25. Wow. 11, 16. 25. Wow, okay, perfect. That hard one and moonshine are on opposite sides.

Hard one, you look across to the other side of the room, the side that Bevin moonshine are spying on, and you see that one of the death knights is perched up hiding on the giant windowsill. There's enough space there for somebody stand up there and hide back. And he has a bow. It's like ready to do something.

Moonshine, you see the exact same thing on the other side. Okay, I sure raise it. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. And then everybody can see Aarot sitting on the throne. The two champions bodies, the elves who were cut down, laying there on the ground. Xander is laying on the ground, was like kind of zombified before, but fell down and was

like seizing, is now just laying there on the ground. Moonshan with your super high perception check, you notice that even through all of this stained glass and everything, you see acerats to an unnatural extent is not moving. is not moving. Oh, he's probably done something to... There's some kind of spell that you can make yourself look dead. False life. Did he leave his body like that? Is he like floating around or something? Should we try and take out these guards with the bows?

Maybe we should. Try and surprise them. That's going to be where we're the most effective. Are they, they're inside the window? they're on, they're inside the window. They're inside, but on the windows, yeah. Can I break them up? I'm gonna just toss them out. Yeah.

Okay, so you guys basically see, so I'm gonna say that you guys can't really hear each other on report sports, because this is a giant grade hull, so you guys are pretty far apart. But you guys both kind of catch a glimpse of each other through the stained glass. It would be hard for somebody inside to see you guys,

but you guys see each other because you know to look for each other. You kind of point the death knights out to each other and you relay to each other that they're both at the opposite end of the room from the like thrown, throughout like the entrance at the first windows. So if you guys would like to like fly over there, you can certainly try that.

I think that sounds good. Going to a rage and trying to wrestle the sky out. Oh yeah, yeah. I'm just like grabbing through the window. Yeah, yeah, we're we're gonna, I want to try to toss the sky toss this guy. Okay, but they're like in the range that we can drag them and throw them to their death If you fucking great if you break the window and grab them you can throw them. Okay, let's do it

I'm not a hard one. I'm not gonna chat. Okay, uh, so you guys Fly over I'll say um You guys are on the middle windows right now Mavis and Bev where do you guys want to set yourself up for when shit hits the fan? Should we get above the, or should we try and get below them so we can pop up?

Could we do that without a stealth roll? Basically go under the window so that the guards couldn't get visibility on us and then they'll go about. Oh, you just want to fly under these guys in case they need help. Yeah, yeah, I would allow you to do that with that stealth check. Sweet, so Maverick's just gets in a support position, gets under the window, Beverly.

We're all going right now. We're going to take them out of these guys from the sky. Hard one and moonshine as you guys land on the same window that the guards are standing at. Go ahead and give me stealth checks. 21. 20. Ah. Ha ha ha.

Wait, I wanna see what I would've gotten. Oh, that was a 19. Thank God for passing that trace. Yeah. Ah. Okay, I'm gonna roll in front of the table. Okay. They don't have any specialty in perception,

just has plus two wisdom, so he's getting 18 or higher. Sssh! Oh! 16. Oh! Hard one, as you land, you see this dude turns around and starts to look out the window,

but since you're flying, This dude turns around and starts to look out the window, but since you're flying, you're able to kind of just like back away, slowly creep back onto the ledge as he turns. I channeled my bird Kaka. I'm time to get the night. Moonshan, what did you get? 21, okay, he's got to get a 19 or higher to get you. Ha ha ha ha you. That one.

This fucking idiot has bow drawn looking the wrong way, like looking into the great hall. Okay, yeah, I'm gonna go for it. The second that I'm about to break through this window, I'm going to drop pass without trace and go into a rage. I'm gonna say he has disadvantage especially because you just rolled the one. So let's have an athletics contest here. You roll with advantage. Because I'm the rage. He rolls with disadvantage. one. Wow. I mean, I got 16. 16.

Moonshine. Finish him. I want to sonia blade him. I want to do the, put my hands on the window sill, kick my legs over my head, grab him with my thick ass thighs and toss him out the window. Mooshide, yeah, you do like a hand spring kick through the window, shattering glass everywhere.

This dude loses his arrow, just freaked out, turns to see you. Your legs come forward, you wrap around his neck. Well, you put in some meaty sound. Hell yeah. You do a backhand spring with his neck still traps between your feet, and you toss him out of the castle, like into the fucking air below. And he just fucking flies off. I can't believe you rolled a net once.

Can we say that Beverly pops his head in and does? Toasty! Hell yeah. So, hard one. You see the window smashes, and this one guard is on high alert. What do you do? I punch through the window and try to grab this guy by the neck. Nice. Go ahead and give me an athletics check with advantage. 29. Ha ha ha ha.

Hard one, finish him. Cool. with advantage, oh. Can Maveris do something to him for flavor? Hell yeah. I drop him right past Maveris. Maveris does in the air, this flits, and punches him in the nuts. Oh, yeah. Get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it,

get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it. He's taller. He's just falling there. So, yeah, you guys both smash through these windows, instantly grab the guards, throw them out of the castle. They both fly down these heavy-ass death knights, who don't have great decks. They have no way of saving themselves.

They disappear. And you guys see, a little splashes into the ocean. Deep, deep, deep, deep, deep below. God, they think right to the bottom. We know that. So he probably the weight of their guilt. So obviously Akira and the Necromancer know that you're here. You still don't see them.

They have not reacted. We're just going to keep same old initiative that we've had. If you guys have just smashed through these windows. Okay, I also wanna point out that the thinking cap is what is giving Bev a stone skin. So the fact that I'm gonna rage doesn't fuck with that. Okay, great. Nice. Yeah, I'm flying it out the room.

I guess I'm low on the initiative order. So if we're still free of movement, I might just try and kind of like position myself towards the throne. Sweet. No one has moved in here. You just see all these dead bodies on the floor and Bev gets down into position kind of near the throne. I don't like, I'm not gonna try and stab through it because I feel like this is a trap, but I want to like faint like I'm doing that. Okay. Bev gets up near the throne. What are you guys doing? Let's say, let's start taking turns, Mavers. I think Mavers is gonna fly in

and just fireball those three bodies on the ground if I can. Nice. Yeah. So I'm gonna say the wizard, like Zander's body is not close enough to, you can either get the two champions or Zander. I'm gonna do burning hands on the two champions instead.

Okay, cool. So you go down, you fly like over the little drive-by. Okay. And you're gonna do flaming hands on the champions. Burning hands, yeah, yeah. Burning hands on the champions. You know what? I'll do it at second level. Sweet. And is that deck saves? Yeah, deck saves.

Okay. That would be 19 to both. You know what? I'll do it at second level. Sweet and is that deck saves? Yeah, deck saves. Okay That would be 19 to both and then I ignore resistances if because I for people who have resistance to fire You start burning the first body fire comes from your hand and you start roasting it and you see as it hits the Champion comes to life and as it hits, the champion comes to life and looks up at you and you see scooped out eyes. No. This like extremely, like you guys have seen his hollow bodies before and like the eyeless ones.

This was like a rush job, like a real sloppy one. Looks up at you and is going to take a crack at you as you fly by. Oh shit, okay. I have my trusty cloak of displacement. Oh sweet, so they roll with disadvantage until they hit you. Yes.

22 to hits. Hits me, for sure. Yes. 15 damage. Okay. Takes a second attack. You do see that This champion is a little bit more lumbering now

Just metagaming wise they had three attacks before but this time she just swings twice Okay, and Misses on the second one and the other body that you burn flinches and then Takes the helm off and you see that this is Akarat wearing the Elven plate. Okay. Only takes half of that fire damage, pops up and goes after you. Oh shit.

Does he take half because he's got resistance? Cause I ignore resistance. Oh, then he just, then he takes the whole thing. Yeah. Oh. Hit the devil right on. He pops up, how did you do that? How did I do what? You're laying on the ground, you fucking do it. What was your plan here? To do exactly this? To get two on the castor? Brilliant. You're brilliant. You did a full costume change for that? That is 19 to hit on the second attack.

He missed on the first one. Oh, can I use a reaction and use shield? I should have done that first. Yes. Okay, so use a reaction, use shield. He does not hit you. He's going to take a third attack. Shout out to the two crew.

He whiffs a big time as, Maverick, you continue to fly away. Bev, you see sitting on the throne, suddenly the body comes to life and charges at you. So you can take an attack as well, because you're prepared there. Oh, great. So, you know what, we'll just go and turn orders.

So they'll just take their turn first. So there's no surprise rounds happening. You see this black helm falls off and you know what, we'll just go in turn order. So they'll just take their turn first. So there's no surprise rounds happening. You see this black helm falls off and you see again, it's the other champion. Looking all screwed up. I got a respect to switcheroo, that's a classic goof. That is truly my name is this 19 to hit. That misses.

Nice, misses on the first attack, takes a second attack, and misses on the second attack. Shout out to the three Cree. Cool. That is hard one's turn. Those guys basically just had reactions held. We'll basically skip their turns and go back to initiative once we can. Cool. So I'm going to fly in next to Maveris and swing my Queens's Hammer at Acarot. Okay. Hey, Maveris, 16 does not hit.

Does not hit. 26. That hits. Yeah. 19 damage. Sweet. Bash Acarot in his new pretty plate mail. You're gonna mess it up. You're gonna mess it up. You damn right. You're gonna make it imperfect. Yeah, that's the fucking plan. I'm gonna take my third attack. Shout out to the three Cree. Mrs. Big Time.

See how new you didn't have it in you. Oh, you know what? I do have it in me. I'm gonna take, I'm gonna use my action search. Yeah. Okay, yeah, why not, right? That's our boy. You shouldn't have fucking teased me.

I don't like that. That's our co-captain. Sorry, Mavericks. Net 20. Woo! Yes! Oh! Oh, my God.

Dude, totally fine with me. Hard one drops out of the air after pulling a dude through a window and then he just bashes Akira out in the face with the Queen Tamer. 36 damage. Shhhhhh. Then I rolled a 4 and I had a 26 with another attack. So I'll roll one more.

So the damage. 12. Cool. At the end of your turn, acrobat is going to use dispel magic on Maveris. You fall down out of the air. Maveris tries to make it look cool. Ha ha ha. You do a quick tuck and roll.

Maveris hit the ground super hard. You did make that look cool, man. Fuck, my arm. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. That is, let's do moonshine. Moonshine, pop-up, charge, acarot. Yes.

Reen. Pop-up, pop-up is going first. He's got them pack tactics Oh 23 gonna hit 23 is gonna hit yeah Good rolls my boy pop-up bites him for 14 He's got to do a strength saving throw or be knocked prone. Okay.

Super passes that. He gets a 23. Okay. And then I think I'm going to try to cast Contagion on Acro. Okay. And I'm gonna try and cast Flesh Rock, which will give him vulnerability to all damage. Ooh, some double damage on everything. Oh, really? Is it?

Oh, I thought it was just getting rid of all of his resistances. No, it would do double damage on everything. Okay. But you see, as you go to cast that, you see the dead body of Xander is actually the necromancer, just wearing his robe, holds his hand up, and is going to counter spell that. All right, last spores him. Does he take poison damage? Because he's got that.

I'm gonna use a fifth level counter spell. What level is your spell? Fit. Okay, is this spell used on the dragon? Yeah. But there's a bunch of different sicknesses I can get. Okay, so you spore some for how much? So I spores that necromancer for 18.

Nice, that messes him right up. He doesn't like getting hit, sweet. So at the end of your turn, the acarod is going to take a legendary action to hit Maveris with a sword. Okay, until the end of my next turn, I still have 22 AC. Okay, cool. Nice!

Hey, good. He gets a 22 to hit. Okay. Interesting. 27 damage. Okay. That is Bev's turn. Okay, I am going to dive bomb the Necromancer. Okay, you are gonna take an opportunity attack from the champion that's on you That's fine. Okay Got that stone skin that's that's stone skin. That's a 20 to hit My AC's 20 so yeah, it says it hits yeah Okay, so this is non-magical so it would be 12 damage you just take six. Oh great.

So yeah, I am tucking into a tight corkscrew spiral, turning my blade into a drill as I try and just bore right through this necromancer. Oh sweet, go ahead and attack the necromancer. Cool. Does a 25 hit. Yes. Okay. And the Necromancer is evil, I imagine.

I can add my... Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Cool. The Necromancer. Well, her Dan was a good... Sure, true, true. There's a couple good eggs. 17 plus 5, 22.

22, 22 damage. Does not like that one bit. Looks very hurt already. Well, then he's not gonna like this either my second attack begins now. Yeah, yeah. Get him. 29 to hit.

Oh, that'll hit. This Necromancer is wearing the most intense plate armor that has ever existed. Very dragon male. 21 damage uh bev finished him okay here's what I do I do exactly what I said I bore through his stomach oh god yeah you just fly forward and skewer him and pin him up against the wall. And as I do that, I pull myself out of him. I turn my eyes directly to Akarat

and I deliver a vow of enmity to him. Okay, as a bonus action. And I say, Akarat, Prince of the Nine Hells, I banish you forever to the gray beyond. Oh, I think maybe I'll be the one doing the banishing this time after I finish off this little counterspeller. You suck my ass. You suck my ass.

Pretty good, pretty good. Step back. Step down my moment a little bit, but it's pretty good. Oh, sorry, I'm so sorry. You suck my ass. You suck my ass. You know what, why don't you suck my ass. You suck my ass.

This is honestly bad. Why don't you all suck each other's asses? This is Mavis's turn. Banish you. This is my turn to you. Oh, I suck it. Yeah, now we're getting into the regular initiative order. Everything was wonky because those guys were like reacting

to what you were doing. Gotcha. Mavis is just going to fireball. Go ahead, take us all to hell. I love hell. Oh, you would. So my use. Instead, I'm just gonna use a Fireball cantrip,

and I'm gonna use the Twinspell, and hit Acroix and the Champion. And at 10th level, or 11th level, it's 3d10. Okay, cool. Shout out to the two crew, and then a 16. You do not hit either. Oh wait 16 plus 11. Oh I mean yeah. Yeah. But then the other one was like 13. Okay. So now it was the second one so I guess that's the champion. Okay. Christ. I rolled a 3, a 1 and a 2. So I hit him for six plus five because I have elemental. Okay, 11. So you know what suck my ass. It's like a

part of his ass. That is hard one's turn. You're also gonna have to suck my ass. I'll swing my hand. I'll get a kitchen then. Three times the dockerot. Okay. Yeah, the kitchen is for ass sucking. If you're in the kitchen, expect to get your ass suck. Okay, handle the sucking, then get out of the ass. That's a shout out to the two crew, but then a 20 and a 26.

The 20 is gonna miss. Wow. He's wearing his new like a beautiful Elven plate mail, but he does take the last attack. 18 damage. Now we're back in the turn order. Nice. So that is Akarot's turn.

Akarot is going to cast staggering smite on himself. On himself? Yeah, that's a bonus action. You light up your sword. Oh, cool. Then he is going to counter spell. You can counter spell it if you want. It's a thing action. You light up your sword. Oh cool. Then he is going to counter spell. You can counter spell it if you want. It's a thing.

Yeah sure, why not? Okay, sweet. What level? Counter spell. Three. Okay, go ahead and roll, because it's a fourth level spell. Okay. Challenge to the Tukur.

Wasted, you still cast the counter spell, so your counter spell fizzles. This is gonna be cast staggering smites, and then he's going to swing on Maverick's ear. Shit, Maverick, you might have to suck his ass. If it happens, it happens. That's a 22 to hit. So brave.

Maverick's gonna look cool doing it. It's true here, Latoch. 36 damage, and go ahead and give me a wisdom saving throw. You have advantage on wisdom saving throws, due to our delicious feast. Still thinking about that, dude. 24 hours. Well, even with advantage, I only rolled a nine.

Okay, so you have disadvantage on attack rolls and ability checks and you can't take reactions until the end of my next turn. Okay. Acker, it's next turn. So even those legendary things, yeah, you can't until it comes back around. So that is only his first attack. It's gonna take a second attack on you. That is a 19 to hit.

Hits. Who's sucking who's ass now? That is. Feel like you're missing the point. We're talking about sucking ass here. This is what normal people say to themselves. I find you're the champion of sucking ass. You're damn right, I am. Yeah, I do it the right way.

King of ass. I do it the right way. 29 damage. OK. I'm at 35. Then takes a 30 tech. Shout out to the core four misses on that one. Nice.

He that is the Necromancer turn. The Necromancer's dead. Bye. Succ-and-ass in Hell now. Sweet. That is the two champions turns. Akra goes, focus your fire. This one's the most annoying.

You see the two champions descend on Maveris. First one takes first attack. 18 to hit. Hit. 14 damage on the first attack. This champion takes first attack, 18 to hit, hits. 14 damage on the first attack. This champion takes second attack, not one, misses big time, just lumbering much slower than usual.

The other one takes two attacks, 17 to hit, hits. 11 damage, okay. Last attack, how you doing? Natural three, misses. No. We met 10. Natural three misses. No. You have to admit 10. Okay, okay. That is Moonshine's turn.

Okay. Papa is going to attack. Remy. After rock. Does A20 hit? 20 does not hit. Oh. I am going to try once again to cast contagion and cast flesh rot on him.

So that he's vulnerable to all damage. Okay. Come on, Mojang. Warm him up. It's going to be a 23. A 23. Yeah, that hits. Hey, hey, hey.

Okay. So what is the language of a yellow? The language is at the, your touch and flex disease make a melee spell attack against a creature within your reach. Want on a hit, you afflict the creature with a disease of your choice from any of the ones described below. At the end of each of the targets turn, it must make a constitution saving throw after failing three of these saving throws.

The disease affects last for the duration and the creature stops making these saves. After succeeding on three of these saving throws, the creature recover from the disease. Okay. So it's like the duration and the creature stops making these saves after succeeding on three of these saving throws the creature recover from the blindness with the dragon. Yeah got it okay vulnerability to all types of damage yes then he's just vulnerable to all damage now you get to force him for 18 which is now 36. Oh those are the nastiest spores you've ever sported me with. Are you sure it's me and maybe not you? You look a little under the weather.

I gotta be honest. Maybe eat. This is my perfect body. Are you brushing your teeth after you eat ass? My pride is body. This might have kicked something up. It's suboptimal. It's melting.

Your body is melting. Shut up. Shut up everyone. This is too tired. Shut up. You're bald. Are you sleeping? Wait a minute, alone. At the end of Moon Shine's turn is going to use a legendary action to attack Maveris.

Oh. That's a crit. I have 10 health, so. 46 damage. Maveris goes down. No. Captain! You see Acherot.

Captain Maveris. Cuts. Maveris goes down. He goes from Captain! You see, Akarad. Captain Maveris, Captain! Cuts Maveris down. And as he cuts him down, he looks up at you, Moonshine. He goes, the thinking cap, or I'm mutilate the body. That is Bev's turn. Bev flies directly over to Maveris, touch hands him for one, and then uses his action to feed him

a potion of greater healing. Oh! Oh! Wow. You know what, Agra, I have had it. Yeah, try and be to lay that body. My will. You need a little living body?

Yeah, now that's a prime body. Yeah, ever real. You have her real. You have her real. Just chugging this potion. Chugging the jug, it suck it, like you suck that. Show us what you learned. Making eye contact with Acura, just show us your potion. Are you everyone, you're wearing one of those

rat boy helmets and you put in bedpores and if you put it in that, I fear funnel it to it. Yeah. Put it into just two cans on either side of my head. Do a potion stand. All do one. I go legend. How much does he roll for that? Potion of greater healing, hold on, I need to do a potion stand. I'll do one. I got a legend. How much is he roll for that?

Potion of greater healing, hold on, I'm gonna need to look that up. 4D4 plus 4, so yeah, that's my turn. Okay, at the end of your turn, he's still going to swing at Maveris. I'll take you down no matter how many hits it takes. You little counter-speller, and he looks at you, Bev,

and I would love to take another person away from you. You little snot. What and he looks at you, Bev. And I would love to take another person away from you. You little snot. What you don't understand is, I barely matter. But not in a sad way. 17 to hit. Yes. 25 damage. I'm getting my ass kicked.

You're supposed to get sucked. Definitely. He's saying as you do. That is, Mavros' turn. Mavros go ahead and give me a death saving throw. Oh. Just a nine. A nine?

Yes. That's one fail. As a legendary action, Acarot takes a sword and puts it through Mavros' chest. The two fails. Mavros' dead. What? And he looks up and he goes,

Two fails? Yeah, two fails from a hit. Yeah. He has three fails. Oh God. I told you to give me the thinking cap. Well now you aren't fucking bartering anymore. You just fucking got rid of your only piece of that was valuable to me.

What does it matter to me? I'll kill another one of your friends then. You just take and take. I can try. Do you think it's gonna make your dad love you? I don't want love. I don't have time for it. Unlike you, I was born with a purpose. I am to deliver the material plane to ill-set the ground jewel of all the gods,

the one plane they all created together, and my father will have it. Well, that's not gonna happen. That is hard one, Stern. You see, your boy just got stabbed through the chest. Okay. He's taken double damage right now. So just as a half-elf human fighter, my potion doesn't do shit for a dead body, does it?

He's dead, yeah. Yeah, okay. Don't worry, I saved room. Right now we got a fucking Yeah, yeah, okay. I'll don't worry. I saved room right now We got a fucking kill a carat. He's taking double damage. Yeah Got it got it. Okay. I feel like we I could do some kind of Grinch type speech where you really just need a friend or a hug You you have hating your heart, but we we want to teach you to laugh and I just Could be my friend. I'll take it out with me. I just hate you so much and I'm gonna hit you with a hammer now.

As we go ahead. 22. 22 would hit, but he's gonna use a reaction to block to parry. Let's excuse E.C. 28. 28 does hit. There we go. 20, so that's 40 damage.

40 damage 40 damage shit Damn yeah critical hit you just smash right across his face You see a bunch of teeth fly off. Wow, that was a those were my favorite Teen sort of an improvement. Oh, you're dead by this time Matt versus gonna live and you're gonna suck his ass 27 that hits Ha ha. Matt versus gonna live and you're gonna suck his ass. Ha ha ha. 27. Uh, that hits. 16-32.

You smash him across the face, a bunch of teeth fly off, his jaws like totally broken. You really shouldn't, you shouldn't have murdered the coolest kid at school. Ha ha ha. You get everything you deserve. At least I'll die doing what I love. Being a piece of shit. Yeah. Um, he's going to, uh, that is Akarad's turn. He is going to cast

banishment on Beverly. Bring it. Uh, go ahead and make a, why do I keep doing banishment to you? I'll say I did it anyway, but it's a charisma saving throw. Ha! Should do it to somebody without charisma. I flash my big braces late and grin. As I try to resist this banishment. It's gonna work this time. It's just a charisma save? Yep, cool. 13, you guys see Beverly disappears.

Okay, Acherot turns to you guys eat Beverly disappears Okay Akira turns to you guys And he looks at Mavericks's body and he goes Your friend Beverly will be gone for one minute by my calculations. That'll make it too long before you can save your friend Mavericks I'm sorry Maybe you should give me the thinking cap and I'll let him come back. Okay, okay, let's easy everybody. Why don't you bring Beverly back and then we'll talk. That is the Champions turns.

They are going to run forward and go after Papa. He's sons of bitches. How long have benefited from the inspired speech, right? Yeah. Hell yeah. He took notes during that lesson. 15 damage to Papa. That's 20 on Papa, so brutal. Only 17 damage to Papa.

He's science! The other one takes its two attacks. 14 to hit. How much? Yeah, that hits. Okay. We should pass him pop-off some little armor. 16 damage.

It look cool. So thin. One more attack. 19 to hit. That hits. Nine damage to pop-off. Pop-off is down. You see, the champions surround pop-off slash them cut him down

Moonshan that is your turn so it is just You and hard one pop-off is down knocked out Mavers is dead on the ground and Beverly has disappeared to where you don't know and Beverly has disappeared to where you don't know. Aaaaah! I can still hear him screamin' so. It shouldn't be possible. It shouldn't be possible. Um, alright, Akra, I think you win.

You want the fucking thinking cap? You're right. I care more about my friends and the fate of humanity. And as I reach for the cap, I cast a six level lightning bolt on him. Oh, what is he, you roll? Cool. It's a dexterity saving throw. Yes, disadvantage on saving throws now,

because that's the best. He doesn't have disadvantage, he has vulnerability. So even if he passes, he'll take full damage. And if he takes full damage, he'll take double damage, which is very bad. He does have advantage on saving throws against magic, though. First roll is a 17. No, that doesn't pass. Okay, second roll. It's a 16, he doesn't pass. That doesn't fucking pass. And you want to know why it would have passed, except because of my cloak. Looks good on you. Oh my god. So he takes 66 damage.

Oh, the 33 but then doubled his 66. And then I also spores him for 36. Oh my god. Oh my god. So hopefully one of those will shake his concentration at least. Moonshine finish him. Oh.

All right. Spread my ass cheeks. No. Oh. It's happening. It's happening. I would actually like to kill him just enough, hurt him just enough to break his concentration

so that Bev can come back and then let Bev do the finishing blow. OK, sweet. And you guys see as soon as Akarot is defeated, the other two champions just plop down onto the ground, just fully dead bodies. So Moonshine, you lightning bolt this dude was already kind of falling apart,

is super vulnerable to all of this damage. You see the metal of his sword, the metal of his new plate and everything, he just fries in there and you see all of his skin. Any skin left over that had melted off goes away and he just becomes the skeleton and begins like falling apart and shattering. No, you can't do this. You're too weak.

You don't deserve that. My father deserved it. You're right. I don't deserve it, but I know someone who does. Beverly, you for a brief moment, it was not very long, because it's only a couple of seconds. You appeared in this plane that you would guess is maybe the Nine Hells.

It was harmless to you. You did not get hurt or anything, but you're standing on extremely hot, black rock in the middle of a lake of fire. And you see flames in the deep distance, and you can see a little silhouette of a little halfling man. Dad? I reach out for him.

He's super, super far away and you see as you reach your hand out, it looks almost like the fire of the lake gets even further away. You get further away from him, his shadow gets smaller. No, but you hear a voice and it sounds like an echo, like it's echoing through this entire level of hell. And you hear him go, you know what happens when Akarad dies, right, Bev? You go free. I take his place. right, Bev? You...you go free.

I take his place. W-NO! Beverly you. W-W-W go on. Finish this piece of shit. You don't finish him, I will, but. Beverly, we can be a happy family together. Your father and me, my dad, just to come bullish on saying you're not with their dads. Beverly takes the amulet off of his neck and just presses it into Akarat's skull

just to try and like stabilize and but keep him from dying sweet Just starts like searing his skull you see he falls on the ground and just starts spasming I told you you were going to the grave forever You don't deserve life and you don't deserve death and I take his head off and I put it on my belt. Yeah, buddy. I do the same with Maveris. Just kidding. Haha.

Beverly, you pull Akira's head off. And you see, as you pull his head off, his jaw comes loose. And he's no longer able to speak, but you do see that he is conscious. You do see that his eyeballs are still there and you just see like the fury in his eyes like straining as he's on your belt loop now. I take him over to Maveris, slap his head right

into Maveris' ass. And with my other hand, cast Provivify. Yes. And with my other hand, cast Provivify. Yes! So we have alternative resurrection roles. If Beverly is going to be casting a spell with the help of Polora, can't help get Malora in on the party. So I want to get in on that. I mean, I'll drain a spell slot or anything like that

to like commune with Melora and try and get her in on it. If you want to break whatever thinking cap, concentration thing you have and just focus kind of all of your powers and like. I give the thinking cap permission to stop casting stones again on Beverly in both me and the thinking cap are gonna huddle up around Maverick.

And enhance Beverly's revivify. Okay, Maverick, go ahead and make your death saves, again, but with advantage. First one, nat 20. Oh! Oh! Oh! Maverick.

Oh, Laura! Instantly pops back up. You suck my ass. Ha ha ha ha. Oh. Mavericks. What happened? You.

We did it. Yeah. Yeah. We did it. Oh, we haven't fully done it yet. I gotta set my butt in the throne. You see, Vrand Brandon runs down the stairs. We did it, gang.

Uh-huh. Give me the C off your goddamn rope. What? He made us fly. You can, you can have an on-roar C. Some extreme, uh, honorable stuff. Beverly is gonna make it lowercase, for sure. Yeah, it's a lowercase C.

You can't tell, except when you're standing next to Maveris. Rand, I think, uh, Quixes was asking about you. Oh, it's a lower KC. You can't tell except when you're standing next to Maveris. Ren, I think Quixes was asking about you. Oh, really? It seemed important. Something about like maybe you are a champion or something. Go ahead and give me a deception check with advantage. Hopping up from death a lot. Not 20. Ah! Ah! Of course the dragon wants to talk to me. Run runs back, does the trick to get downstairs.

Do you guys see him disappear? I'm gonna close like the... Put my head, put a chair or something around top of the hall. Amazing. Noah, moonshine. Yeah. Let's put you in that throne. Yeah, it's time for me to mount that throne.

And I die bomb in that throne. Yeah, it's time for me to mount that throne and I Die bum into the throne In shine you sit and I say babe can you give me like a fun little like a New Year's Eve countdown for a minute. It's a minute, right? That they then I need to sit in it. Yeah, yeah Okay, yeah, I minor illusion a big digital clock Okay, yeah. I minor illusion a big digital clock. Yeah, yeah. Beverly, digital clock. So it'll just be one number and then a minute later it'll just change.

All right. Okay, now what I'm saying is it starts at 59 seconds. I know I like that. I like it. I like it. Okay. One. Beverly just holds up one finger. You guys have the skull of Acarot on you.

Maveris is back to life. Hard one you stand proudly next to moonshine. No, I absolutely meal. Yeah, she takes the knee. Usually only does that for mom, but in this case, Maveris takes the knee as well. I feel like I got some new charisma in this cloak. Intelligence, right?

30 seconds. No one's shy. How do you know? It just says one. You wearing the thinking cap, the ancient relic of the elves, you carry the pride of the elves with you, you sit in the headmaster's throne,

your father's chair must be nice. The minute ends for a second, feels a little anticlimactic, you guys can't figure out what to do, and then all of a sudden a magic spell pushes all of the doors open, all of the windows open, and you guys can see the city and the distance and you see throngs and throngs and throngs of people cheering as if they were watching the whole thing just going absolutely nuts. And you see the masters appear along with wizards, and everybody starts flooding in. Everybody celebrating, it's like fucking Marty Graugh. Like everybody starts celebrating in the streets.

Luke on his runs up, he grabs Moon Shion, and he goes, you look perfect there. Why, we watched the whole thing, we saw everything, you were incredible. All of you were incredible. Hard one, nice job stopping the world from ending, Beverly, nice job killing that devil dude, Mavris.

The counter spells, the counter spells, my God, the counter spells, grabs you by the face, you get free tuition here as long as you need. I might be quit in school. What? Actually, Lucon, I think there might be actually a room he really wants.

This guy should be a professor. Look, if you let me teach a class, and I don't have to take any other classes, and there's that room upstairs that we just happened to find, looks pretty nice. Uh, you see, uh, he looks concerned for a second, and then he goes Perhaps maybe you could coach like an intermural team or something

Maverus the school. I'll give you I'll give you the room and an intermural team So you don't think I can the champion can't teach a class is what I'm hearing. I can give you a persuasive check with advantage 24 You see he goes, perhaps I have been a little old fashioned in my way of thinking. Everyone, please welcome Maveris Theon Schooled, the new professor of sorcery at Glade Home University. Uh, and everybody cheers. Maveris Bowles deeply. Woo!

I'm gonna be upstairs in my room. You guys see everyone here is celebrating. Some of the masters are not there though. Looks like probably the dude from Ezri, peaceed as soon as they were able to, et cetera, et cetera. So a lot of the bad guys aren't here, but everybody watched this whole thing. You hear, yeah, cheers and everything.

Lucana explains to you that there were basically like, spheres that people, like crystal balls essentially that people could watch the final round on so everybody saw everything. So the entire electronics store with crystal balls essentially. Is Carl here? Carl runs in, dude that was so solid. Hey man, you know what solid you are. Bound or runs in like kind of drunk.

Carl drove me here, he's so solid. Yeah, so beer so that he could drive. He would let you get fucked up so you could drive. That's just the, I'm just appreciating being here. Dude, can I live with you in the upstairs room? Carl? Yeah. We're such great roommates.

Well, isn't it? Well, we'll talk about it. Oh my god. And Munchain, Luke, I'm asking. I think I think I asked all this celebration is going on. It kind of goes slow motion for Moon-shine for a moment. As she sits on the throne, and I think she just has a private little smile to herself. And it's just like, never in my life did I think a crick could be the pride of the elves and then just smiles.

But Mojain, you look out at the crowd, high elves and crick elves celebrating together and your father looking on it you proudly. And your father looking on it you proudly. And that's where we'll end our session. Oh, I'm so full of enthusiasm. Oh, man. I've just got a new room. Yes, truly the most important thing that happened in that episode. Wow.

That verse has a single. Oh, she has a single. That's awesome. That's awesome. You live she has a single, that's awesome. Oh, that's awesome. That's awesome, you live in the fucking capital, though. So much of your punk space. In a way, I'm a king.

King of the school. Literally king of the school. I'm a fucking king of the school. You're gonna be such a bad teacher. There's many types of learnings. That's true. You're never gonna assign a single written paper, because then you'd have to read it.

Yeah, find a beautiful leaf. The rules are not for everyone, but anybody can teach. Those who can't do teach, and those who can't teach, should also teach. Wow. We'll talk about it more in the short rest, but you guys did fucking awesome in that final battle.

Got a little dicey there at the very end, but it's Jesus. Now you got a knockout maverick, he's got too many fucking counter spells that was messed up on my banishments. But Bev with the knocking out the Necromancer allowed me to get the contagion. That felt true.

Yeah. The one finding that shit out about his dad was a pretty harrowing for as well, gee. answer, allow me to get the contagion. That's not true. Yeah. Yeah. But finding that shit out about his dad was a pretty harrowing bird as well, yeah. I'm so fucking glad that I saved, wait, this is all good short message here. Yeah, I'm glad the short rest, yeah, pieces are shit.

Go on over to patreon.com slash nadpod that's n-a-d-d-p-o-d don't sing yet. I'll be talking more about this episode. If you don't subscribe to the short rest, Ren will laugh at you for being poor. Oh, yeah, Ren missed the whole celebration. That's canon, Ren was in the basement that time. Yeah, guys, we got some stuff to plug.

We got some shows coming up. You can come see us, some of the shows are sold out, but you can come see us September 10th in Atlanta. You can see us September 12th in New York. You can see us September 13th in Boston. Guys, you can get those tickets over at nadpod.com slash live. Correct. We've mentioned this a few times,

but the New York show is going to be revisiting the Barry incident. I think that's what we're using. Tana Tantanko. Yes, Nathan Yaffee will be joining us on stage. The portant portally gnome himself. This week I would like to plug big city grains. It's television show I worked on. I think it's really nice and cute. It's fun for the whole family. You can check it out on Disney. Soon on Disney Plus I believe.

That's right. That's right. That's right. Next, it's gonna be the Falcon and Winter Soldier and Big City Greens all together, right next to each other. Yeah, so Amazon, iTunes, Disney, Disney Plus, check it out, this one show. Hell yeah. Zach, you got anything to plug? I'll just plug Dimension 20, Unsleeping City again.

And I think around now, that episode of Adam Runes, everything I wrote that Emily is in is probably wearing around. Yeah. Very cool. Adam Runes D&D. In possible. We also plug, we got September 20th.

It's coming up all of Hot Tate Season 2 goes to the Pop Now streaming app. Yeah. Shit. we got September 20th, it's coming up all of Hot Tate season two goes to the Pop Now streaming app. Yeah, shit, yeah. September 20th, our wedding anniversary. Which is also our wedding anniversary. Which is a complete coincidence. Yeah, you can watch the show on Pop TV live. They're gonna be airing two episodes every week.

You can see the first and second episode on September 20th. But if you want to just download the pop now app, you can watch all of them Benjamin one week. I know a lot of y'all did not get Murphy and Emily Wedding gifts. So, you should actually be really great. So get them ratings of y'all. Jake, what do you got to plug?

You know, I'll plug our Manchester show. All right, our show, we have two more shows in Europe, London and Manchester. I believe London already sold out. I honestly have no idea if Manchester sold out or not because the event, you don't respond to us when we ask. But if Manchester has not sold out, go check it out, see if you can get a ticket.

Come see the boobs abroad. Yeah. The boobs abroad. So excited for all the shows. Policie, that's such a good name for the Mini-to-war the boobs of broad Guys follow us on Twitter at CH merf is me at called these call the adiacs for assembly at chik her Which is Jake and at Zachoyama is Zachoyama you tweet about the show using hashtag nad pod that's n-a-d-d-p-o-d

We are The use ofd. We are we are! The use of a nation! We are we are! The use of a nation! Yeah baby, thanks! Wooo! Well done! Ah, the benevolent council of elders, please allow us to thank Brad D, the only pebble pot that isn't Craven.

Always on call to kill a cockroach for one of their relatives, which is actually pretty impressive, since two halfling a cockroach is quite large. J-Loma 72, aka Steelbreaker, Hardwan's Jimspiration. J-Loma 72 has a workout app that Hardwan's been secretly using on the road. There's a lot of burpees on it. Fuck yeah. Dylan B, a sword wielding wizard, there's a lot of burpees on it. Fuck yeah. Dylan B, a sword wielding wizard surrounded by a floating army of blades at all times. Has a brother who was a razor wielding wizard surrounded by a floating army of blades at

all times, who much to the disgrace of the family became a very quick barber. Danny P, Bohumi's resident artist, painted hard one senior portrait at the dwarf finish, hard one demanded so many revisions. Danny P actually got sick of it, and the portrait remains unfinished and unperfect. I might add. Spencer, Casperu, patron elder of libation, ale maker to gods and heroes of Bohumia, a like Spencer made a teapling sangria in honor of maveris that looks like blood and lights on fire.

That's awesome. Beardman Dan, the longest beard in all of Bohumia, also the longest thumb in all of Bohumia, which is quite startling to behold, so not even the thumbnail, just the longest thumb, insane. Intermez W, the Bat King, heroically held all of the Glade Home on their back as it was plummeting and is the real reason Glade Homeome stabilized, an unsung hero, take that rent. Spartus, a barbarian therapist, Spartus teaches you to rage from a place of love. Adam R, the R-rated assassin,

their mugshot is heavily pixelated. Danielle, the dastardly dame, Danielle is so dastardly, she actually unlocked the windows right before the band of boobs drive the death knights out of them. Cool, thanks for helping us. Hugh, C, aka Haldorf Rossback, MVP of the Giant Wars, Crude on the SS Stormborn and Foss

alongside Elias and Red has only ever pissed off the SS Stormborn never used a toilet before. Wow! Danielle, you, aka Multifor, the many-faced magician, very consistent and predictable personality, though. So, there's that. Jordan DJ, legendary DJ of the realm, currently setting up their booth to DJ the Wizard Tournament after party. Damn, that shit's gonna be lit. Jeffrey S. Lord of the Fjord, born of the sword, and a vanquisher of Bores. Jeff just knows

what to say to get out of a bad conversation. You gotta excuse yourself, bud. Cutter, W.A. High Elf Dandy-Cuterned, Quick Barcatect has been very helpful patching up the infrastructural damage Glade Home took with Bark. I appreciate it. John S.A.K.A. Schubert, the mushroom currently floating down the Glade Home, moat on a leaf and telling anyone who will listen about how much they hate goat men and workers. I could listen to that shif for ever. Ryan M. Hardwan's Ram just entered the fighting ring in Esri because they have nothing to live for anymore on a hot winning streak for the same reason, though.

Don't worry buddy, I'm coming for you. Elena C. A chosen soldier who in the privacy of their own home enjoys the blasphemous gluttony of a milk shake. God, that's fucked up. Michael Mick D. had mixologists at the Blue Monnet Inn recently confused their alchemist kit for their mixologist kit and accidentally created a fog cloud of Bacardi Razz. Andrew M. Abumble Bear, which sounds adorable, but is actually a bumblebee the size of a polar bear and it's terrifying.

Victor T. Balnor's boy, whose loving dad was ripped from his family and transported to another world. Sometimes when Balnor has too many but heavies he momentarily planships back, it's just very confusing for Victor. Just an eye, a warlock who has so many spell slots as the enemy they are fighting has eyes. Great in a fight against spiders, not so much against an army of blind albino cave crabs. Jacob C taught Ren the fly spell, only did it get Ren to fly away from them. Nice. Elena M, the only dualist in Bahumia who uses a baguette

instead of a sword, the trick is whenever they start losing the fight just turns into a picnic. Nick Pux, the amazing code master who programmed our website, also wrote the script for the spell that transported headmaster Lou Connison, the other teachers away from Gladehome during the tournament, heavy stuff. Earl and Kathleen L, a married couple of death knights who are currently sticking out to band of boobs and wait, did you just hear a noise from the Wootenau? No! Jive G, one of Akarats hastily made hollow bodies who actually looked pretty good.

Yeah, they were hastily done, but it kind of had an abstract artistic to it. Hot shit. Jostrich, the jock ostrich, just started a just stretching practice to supplement their strength workouts and is looking life. Damual R, Ram Damual's evil twin was supposed to be Akarot's steed after he returned victorious, but now that Akarot's dead, Daniel is just kind of freelance, lifting for a bunch of low level Demi demons. Jennifer V has a V even more vicious than Cobbs, their secret, mountain climbers, in the

cool, and thickening lava from an eruption of Mount Forge, it's not an easy workout regimen to replicate, you gotta sweat it out. Destincy, Carl's younger sibling, who idolizes Carl even after everything still doesn't understand that Carl didn't compete. Well, you just idolize him for being so damn solid. Devin B, the bodega lord can grant you anything you desire, but there is a 10 wish minimum

if you want to use a credit card. Christian H. Serrezio Salazar Salaman Sakurai as de sesuani, Seventh of his name, a sexy Peruvian snake folk with sweet snake patterns on his skin with a plus 40 to charisma. It is literally impossible for Sergio to fail a persuasion check. Michael L, the owner of the comic book shop in Hill Home, was very sad that someone stole cleric. Comics from their unattended store, then very happy to find a big pile of gold waiting for them.

Aww, Sam H. Alonis is dealer with the only Bahumian with a higher tolerance and hard one, can triple fist, ails, baller. Trayle the cray-fay, who stay, still that is, Trayle has 120 speed and simply can't stop yippy skipping. Aaron G. Master of the banishment spell, makes Akurat look like crap or art. Jory S, a jacked wizard, Jory earned their massive gains with the balance diet of monopotions and benching giant tones. Alucard, a reverse Dracula.

Alucard's spits blood at their victims, it's honestly worse than being bitten, baby, doc. The only doctor to ever perform their own C-section, also the only person to ever sue themselves for malpractice. Adam H. was once hit by Liza's airship and lived for three whole days. RIP Adam H. Ryan, hard ones ram, luckily for Adam H. Ryan was waiting for them on the great, heavenly plane of Mount Celestia together, they skip around mountains and slam their heads together when they're feeling rowdy. They're not dead, they're fine.

Big Buck! Pregnant Elk, moonshine's Elkin, baby, fun fact moonshine now has a telepathic link to Big Buck while she's wearing the thinking cap. John, W. Richard, ex Machina, introduced the Crick to stickers, or as they call them, crickers. They were immediately banned after young insumedies tried to stick the crick and populated the water with thousands of stickers. Sorry I meant to say polluted the water, but you can also say populated. That sort of vaguely works. Troy McSee, the fanciest lad in all of Bohumia to Troy, Operation Fancy Lad is just

Operation Every Day. That's all the time. Cannibalistic Kathulu, a monster of pure destruction who still makes time to scry it, their mom, every Sunday. You gotta scry it on your mom, twice a week, at least. Sam L, a trinavalean steamer who got into some hot water after having a blacked out blavan on as a guest. Uh-uh. Dom R, a mob boss in Glatoron who is having an extremely difficult time selling illegal booze to the milk obsessed populace. Josh S. the revived cyborg version of Josh the cobalt, Josh is twice as strong

as he was before. That is right, he's level 4. Look out, boobs. Blitz being gemitri owner of Dwargur's big burger. The Dwargur's who make their fries scoop them out of their fryer with their bare hands so every carton of fries comes with free melted dwargier skin. Yum! Caleb Storm, I, Cup Bear in Cords Great Hall, the anchor of Cords, Flip Cup Team. Nicholas C has starred in every single movie ever made in Bahumia. That includes doing a voice over for a green team, produced animated Veggie Tales rip off called The Vegetable Stories.

Mike H. once totally kicked quicksises ass, just straight up wrestled the dragon, and one. Kevin S., a great home university legend who once farted into the all-caster apparatus, Epic! Absolutely Epic, bro! Matthew E., a fire giant who was banished to hell, and honestly, kinda liked it. Samuel B. lived in Cragwater for a while but was able to get out of there before the Mithril madness took effect. Samuel looks back at their time in the mountain with a smile.

Till for G, author of the hit children's book and movie, Ulfgar goes punch was furious to find out that Scoutmaster Denny later went on to rip off their book with Ulfgar goes kick. What a cravin, little piece of shit. Guardian of light, Zach H. Bohumi is only Keyblade wielder, the only Bohumi in ever to fight side by side with Mickey Mouse. Now that's cute. Curtis asks, Curtis has never fought alongside Mickey Mouse, but did kick Kupy's ass one time? Colton B, a bully at the Dwarf and Hitch who called hard one on his bluff that he could

eat a thousand eggs, this razzing led to hard one getting his stomach pump. I was able to eat 888 eggs. Yens, Christian T, the only Jervilian that can win a coyote ugly sword dance against Jen's Lendell. Dang, and that was on Trinstagram, baby. Gage M, the last green teen left in Galatoron, recently put up flyers for next year's jam-brain and was promptly thrown into the nearest dungeon. Erin C., the homeless man that was used by the boobs to distract the chosen back in Galatoron

currently sharing the same cell with Gage M. Dang. Montana Monarch, beautiful butterfly royalty who will one day rule the free fairies of the Feywild provided they aren't all killed by trolls. L&D, the fiercest woman in Bohumia, Ellen's footsteps cause earthquakes and her battle cry is a tornado. Ellen's greatest nemesis is the other people that live in her apartment building. TJM, the gnome barbarian.

By the time you hear TJ's blood-curdling Teehee, you're already dead. RPKB, R2T2's less helpful cousin, basically a zippo with wheels, which makes them perfect for their job as Atlantis's chief doobie lighter. Oh yeah, Toka baby. Taylor S, aka Trass the Traveler always has potions in case of emergencies, unfortunately, they're all travel size and only do 1D4 of healing.

Damn. Anime intellect. Bahumi is number one graphics scroll collector has collected every issue of the extremely rare dwarven manga known as Ulf Garuto. Zolo-dolo, a level 20 college of audio engineering Bard who produces all of Kid Cobald's tracks, uses their bardic inspiration to make sure Cobald's songs all slap for maximum damage. Joshua C, an air elemental custodian at the Elven Academy, currently trying to get demon blood stains off the floor of the banquet hall. see an air elemental custodian at the Elven Academy currently trying to get demon bloodstains

off the floor of the banquet hall. Larissa J. Quixis' Elven accountant Larissa helps the dragon avoid glade homes taxes by managing his private offshore treasure hordes. Right kind to ya. Dylan CM, the wannabe DM, keeps accidentally using a monopoly board instead of a grid, play mat, come on Dylan. That's a rookie mistake in you.

You keep on making it, it's not cool. Kelvin noodles, the pasta elemental, Kelvin recently learned wild pasta magic and now rolls a D6 to determine the stuffing used in the Raviole blast attack. Be money, Balnor's hip hop alter ego, wears a giant gold tuna on a chain around their neck and keeps accidentally trying to eat it. Seems like it's not an accident at this point. Jay and Iron Deep dwarf trying to stall the chosen approach by posting a sign that says

milk this way with an arrow pointing towards a cliff. Full proof, but they do have wings, their birds after all. Heartless master, a cruel boss that makes everyone in their department work over time. They're also an actual zombie whose heart was stolen by a bird, but that's no excuse for poor management tactics. C-C-Lulu, a Bohumi enclosure that makes chainmail so flexible and light, you can actually do yoga in it. It gives you a negative 3 to AC, but it's honestly worth it. Looks great on Shay, by the way. Paul B. Ackarot's assistant currently looking for a new gig, so if you're a dark lord and need of motivated professional, work experience, crafting, unknowable flesh-horus to serve

your dark purpose, hit Paul up. Barnes and Adler, a magic barn with huge chicken legs that walks around tending to the crops and livestock of its master, the Farmyyaga. Yasmin aka the Yasminian Devil, a chaotic team team recruited by Ilsa to deal with all the adventures in Bohumia who threaten his rule with their bugs bunny ass shenanigans. Eric G, open Bohumia's first juice store, currently offering a special rate on their Uku's Goofberry cleanse. That's gonna clear your system for sure.

Jackalope Audity, the drummer for Pendergreens' favorite new metal band, Ratnuts. Jackalope has a 30-piece drum kit that they play by whipping individual drums with their long, incredibly dirty dreadlocks. Zach C., an Elven Sage who created a powerful cap that gives a plus 10 charisma bonus to the rare few cool enough to pull it off in the common tongue it is known as the Kangle. Aiden R, Pendergast childhood best, Aiden owned a souped up drill car invented, calling people knobs. They're also currently imprisoned in a gem

for selling bootleg energy drinks outside of the Esri 711. Jeremy R, the bartending assassin for the SS Stormborn, once killed three men with a single cocktail umbrella, which is a lot lamer than it sounds. Jeremy basically poked them until they bled out. Torturous, even. L.E.K. the offspring of a forbidden romance between an anti-paladin and a chosen angel. L.E. was born with leathery bat wings and an addiction to chocolate milk.

Jesus. Luke H. a snarky orc who's post on Yelp, not to be confused with their brother, a snorkeling orc who floats in kelp. Ritterin, Kaka's former master, to build a crow-shaped hole in their heart they recently adopted a baby named Gaga. Thoughtful. I'm hopeless, a down on their luck adventurer tried arcane to lift their spirits but all their hair turned to feathers and then fell out.

At least it was cool for a little bit. Timmy R runs a magic orb-storing glade. If you need orbs, then this is your store. Alex M, a high elf turned hay elf. That's right, a witch cursed Alex, and now there is straw stuffed scarecrow. Kaka, watch out! Kaka's afraid of that type of shit. Cody John H, the only teacher that Mavericks likes,

at least once a week Cody shows up hungover and plays the Sorcerer's apprentice on the projector. It rules. Aaron R.S. Pandemonium's only therapist currently helping the goat-fein make more goat friends. Lucas B. A Shadowfell bartender who invented a fruity blood-drink named Fangria just minutes after the boobs slaughtered all the vamps. Tough luck, Lucas. Ruben A, leader of an ancient dragon cult attempting to resurrect the dragon queen, Tiamat, who is super peoed at theala and ackrat for stealing their thunder.

Jordan L, the greatest tuba player in Bahumia known to use his tuba to murder enemies, then win their loved ones over with a crisp tune. Laura S, a star spawn who runs at J a jujitsu gym called Sparspawn. After an epic sash, all of Laura's students go to the bar, Laura actually owns Sparspawn. Laura is making cash handover fist. Jay Parker, the first player to hit a so-so sick trick playing the Giant Shredder game at Smuggler's Bounty, Jeff donated all of their cash to the Frostwind Dwarf Nage

in an act of Dwarf N of dwarfens deemed whatever, dude. Austin C. The Jester Mage, a sorcerer who imbues items with wild magic and wreaks havoc on the world. When the chosen were standing in moonshine's stump, Austin magically reversed the pipes on moonshine's toilet to hilariously unhygienic results. Austin M. R. A. K. A. The butcher known as bone saw, trying very hard to sell their new recipe for cobalt beef to twerger's big burger. Just a pissed off trist. A. K. A. touch it, graciously letting their hair turn autumnal colors as they age. Damn, work it

trist. Kaley, at least the honey queen with a heart of gold, Kaley leaves their back door unlocked and their fridge stocks, so displaced honey goblins can come yet the honey, whenever they please Dave J. Bell in the bar. A traveling bar that follows the band of boobs around singing the tales of their exploits, hard one continually requests dashboard confessional and Dave just isn't sure if he should keep on indulging him. Devon W. A Charizard bar.

Pretty cool, just a Pokemon in Bohemia. That has to be illegal. I think. Chris H. a bird who is incredibly insulted that the chosen angels are being called birds, but don't worry Chris, you are the angel. Chenua B. a skeletal mouse who taunts Erdan's skeletal cat. Try she might Chenua is just too clever and too quick to ever be caught.

Sam H. Lydia Stormborn's Vice Ruler of Shadowfell. Sam doesn't have very many responsibilities, but as long as their soul doesn't get imprisoned forever, they believe they're being groomed to be next in line. Jarrade E. Lydia Stormborn's personal assistant in Shadowfell, currently plotting how to trap Vice Ruler Sam's soul and a gem forever. Brian, Pendergast, former roommate, tried moving into the jar with the star spawn but had to move out because their conversation was just too dense. Brian couldn't keep up, couldn't keep up, they're too quick-witted though star spawn. Her Majesty Claudette, Queen of the Crick, though at the Crick, everyone is their own Queen, so Claudette's orders are

typically ignored. Carbureau, Chapel Hill, FPV, a known bodybuilder who holds the Bohumi in record for the heaviest, squat, and that actually may be the source of hard ones distaste for gnomes. Persephone, knows power word kill, and also power word krill. Persephone can kill you or summon thousands of christation any time they want. Joseph M, the half-orc bard ish. Joseph attended Bahumi as bard college of valor and flunked out because of bad grades. Now Joseph works as an airship gas station attendant and plays the lute in his mom's basement. Also thinking about dusting off the old fort in the attic, you know, just in case they need somewhere else to loot.

Rees and S, Blavins drinking buddy, Re reuses the only person who can understand Blavin both figuratively and literally sends Blavin tends to drink himself into a stupor. Jackie, a super wit rich bullywag who lives in Galatoron had a Scrooge McDuck style, Vault full of brown leaves, and another one filled with platinum. Haley, a green teen organizational employee who's tasked with planning next year's jamboreen and already getting worried with that with the impending Great great war the jamboreen may once again have to be cancelled. Steven C. Aloria's big tuna fish that haunts Balanor's dreams, Steven is wild and free and will never be caught, canned or eaten.

Dubi Ash-tray, Olkov uses Dubi Ash-tray whenever he sits down to get baked and work on his act. Olkov wouldn't be able to keep it light without you Dubi. Diane W. The captain of Mavers' Ultimate Frisbee team Mavers' is too cool for almost and work on his act. Ol'Kob wouldn't be able to keep it light without Ydubi. Diane W. They captain of Mavers' ultimate Frisbee team. Mavers is too cool for almost everyone, but he does think Diane is pretty chill, actually. Maxwell C. fights their battles, holding their sword by the blade and stabbing people with

the hilt. It seems inefficient, but it has been working so far. So keep it up. Mike K. Abahumian gymnast who is on the cover of the classic serial meaties. It's a high protein beef serial from to workers Big Borgher. Michael M. A. Bahumian swimmer who stares Mike K's photo in the eyes as they pound bowl after bowl of meaties, vowing to be the next athlete on the cover. Omri M. A tween age Kraken, not quite as stolen someone as a teenage cracking, but not so innocent as a baby

cracking. Omri is just a cool cracking who's into Dracon Josh, loves Nickelodeon. Alright, thank you all. You honor us. That was a Hate Yum podcast.