Not Another D&D Podcast - Trinyvale X Strahd - Ep. 6: The Blade of Truth

Episode Date: August 8, 2025

With allies by their side, the Triplets make a final, desperate stand to save the village of Barovia! Jens inspires the townsfolk, Onyx seeks a hidden truth and Nyack gets serious as the Trin...yvale X Strahd crossover continues!Subscribe to Us on Patreon! - Patreon.com/NaddPodCREDITSEditing by Brian Murphy and Caldwell TannerProduction and Sound Design by Daniel Ramos (@Schubirds on IG)Logo Design by Chelsea LeCompteMusic Includes:"Trinyvale Opening Theme" by Emily Axford“The Gate” by Emily Axford“A Hunkle’s Plea” by Emily Axford“Barovian Tango” by Emily Axford“Moonsick” by Emily Axford“A Memorable Feast” by Emily Axford"Strahd" by Emily Axford“Selfless” by Emily Axford"Lights Out" by Emily Axford“The Night Lotus” by Emily Axford“Half Brothers” by Emily Axford“The Little Moon” by Emily Axford"Where is the Manager?" by Emily Axford"The Tarroka Suite" by Emily Axford"Trinyvale Closing Theme" - Emily AxfordSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:01:06 This is a headgum podcast. Welcome to Trinnavale. Trinnavale. And also Barovia. Barovia. Barovia. Yeah, that's music to my ears. That's the only music I listen to.
Starting point is 00:01:25 When I drive my car with my windows down, people are concerned. but you know what I'm concerned about the fate of Barovia folks I'm concerned about the fate of Nyack you are yeah I'm not as concerned about the fate of Barovia yeah best thing niac's ever heard no I am Brian Murphy Jens doesn't care yeah okay personally here at the table we're concerned about Nyack so let's get right to it this is episode six of Trinnavale Extrad I am your Dracula uncle aka Drunkle Caldwell Tanner and I'm joined as always by my pernicious players Brian Murphy.
Starting point is 00:01:59 I thought Reagan was a vampire. Now things are dire. Jen Zendell. It's down to the wire. And we've got Emily Axford. Losing our shit over our fallen triplet. It's Alex Limeier. I was like, I think there's something
Starting point is 00:02:18 I'm misunderstanding here. That pause was pregnant with twins. Yeah. And speaking of twins and triplets, we have Jay Kerwitz. Triplit Bud, who's losing his. His blood, Nyack is the ran afloor. Your blood, buddy, it's everywhere.
Starting point is 00:02:33 Yeah. Okay, folks, I know we are eager to have a second funeral here for Nyack. But before that, bury me and a spud fuckers. That's extra. How about a quick recap? That's it. All right. When last we met, you three had just witnessed the arrival of Count Straud von Zarevich
Starting point is 00:02:53 at the funeral of the Bergamaster. With his horsebone heliclopper idling in the background, Strade announced that he had come to pay his respects to the late Bergamaster, and also to take Marina, or as he called her, Tatiana, away from the chaos of Borovia and into the safety of Castle Ravenloft. To further prove his point, Strad had his servant Reagan, Misty step into the church, to Free Doru, the vampire spawn, imprisoned in its undercroft.
Starting point is 00:03:20 Once Free Doru smashed your spudfucker's sample bar, then ran to attack Onyx. Villain! However, before he could reach her, Onyx used mask of many faces to disguise herself as Marina, then had Bluetooth fly her to safety. She then struck Strad, only to discover that he had somehow stolen your power and was using it to instantly heal himself.
Starting point is 00:03:41 Afterwards, Jens attempted to hold off Strad using a tiny, invisible bow. It wasn't a bow. There was never a bow. It's unclear. But you mind one. I don't know what to tell you. I'm a good performer. Just really invisible, probably. Anyway, he got a face full of fireball as a reward. Despite his failed effort, Strad seemed intrigued and offered Jins a vice president of development
Starting point is 00:04:03 position within his empire. Next, Reagan missed he stepped to the roof and used a study action to locate the real Marina while bragging about how many articles about magazines he's read. You know what? Nerd is geek shake, baby. It's back. Finally, Marina entered the church and found safety from the vampires who can't enter a residence without being invited in as the battle raged on.
Starting point is 00:04:25 Onyx attempted to steal Straud's heliclop. only to be rebuffed, and then got attacked by Dauru. Jins got pushed into the burgomaster's grave and hid in his coffin. Yep. I did good turns. Nyack fought with Reagan to reclaim his bow, and Strade attempted to charm Marina. As Ismark made a brave stand against the vampire lord, you three all sought refuge in the church as well.
Starting point is 00:04:52 To try and throw Strad off the scent, Onyx used a silent image spell to make it seem like Marina had exited the church and was coming to meet him. Eager to rejoin the fray, Reagan Misty stepped into the church and felled Nyack with two poisoned arrows. Nyak now lies bleeding on the floor, his friends all watching with concern. And that is where we are now. So as Nyak falls, you hear a deep echoing laugh from outside the church.
Starting point is 00:05:26 Very good, Reagan. very good, make them tremble. The church's timbers seem to rattle as you hear Straud laughing. Dust from the rafters falls onto the still body of Nyak, illuminated by flickering candles. Overhead,
Starting point is 00:05:42 Reagan cackles in victory. But all is not lost, because it is Nyack's turn, and we've got to roll some death saves. Oh, boy. Wow! Right, there's hope. Jenta's eyes water, and you can't tell if it's for Nyak or if it's for the spudfucker soft launch failing.
Starting point is 00:06:01 No, you can tell. Quite obvious. So as a reminder, you've already got one automatic fail. So let's see if you can save on this one, Nyack. What did you get? Nyack coughs up a single chive. That's an 11. All right.
Starting point is 00:06:18 Yes. Hell yeah, one save. Awesome. So you catch the scent of potato on the wind. and you start to reinvigorate. I cradled Nyack's head. One of the founding members is one of the only ones that got to try one of the potatoes, a true failure.
Starting point is 00:06:38 Let's see. Next in the order is, is Mark. He is still outside the church with Dorwin Strad. Through the door, you hear him shout, Friends, the vampires are coming. Please, you must flee. I will hold them off as best I can. I gave you only water.
Starting point is 00:06:53 Oh, yes. Yes, I will use it. Should we, Ismark, should you come in here and we'll just try to kill Reagan? I'm really fucking pissed at him. Let's all surround him. Are the villagers in here? Let's just fucking kill this guy. You guys had pitchforks before, remember?
Starting point is 00:07:07 Yeah, he's got a bow. If you square up with him, he can't even attack you except without disadvantage. Yeah, Ismark swear up. Damn, that's a really good point. You hear Ismark's voice is wavering but earnest. And he says, Here I come. I have lived a lesser life, but I shall die.
Starting point is 00:07:26 You don't have to die necessarily, his work. So he's going to burst through the door, leaving the two vampires outside. He draws his long sword and his short sword, and he is going to launch at Reagan. Hell yes. Careful of my blood. Don't slip. Nyak's having trouble, living. Nyak's having an issue.
Starting point is 00:07:52 Is he good? Who could be good on a day? day like today. I look at the spilled over potatoes. I look at Nyack. You can't tell which one I'm upset about. Did he die of art break? Yes, I say. He's very obviously still breathing. He still has so many wounds or so many arrows within him. It must have been art break. Okay, he's going to take three swipes at Reagan. That is an 18, a 19, and a 21. Damn. All hit. Yeah. It is Mark the normal indeed. As he swing, you do see under his doublet, some kind of beefy arms.
Starting point is 00:08:30 This guy has been, like, working hard. Wow. Push-ups instead of taking care of your dead father. Hopefully in a different room. Jens does a motion, like, ease up on his mark. His forearms are jacked for some reason. Remember, we all gooned in the oats, everyone. So he hits Reagan for 28 damage.
Starting point is 00:08:56 Whoa. Whoa. Okay. Yeah. He's been doing some push-ups in the Goon Cave as well. It's not just pushing out. It's pushing out as well. Yeah, you see he just like, like a cyclone of vengeance whirls into Reagan, slashes him good.
Starting point is 00:09:13 You see Reagan, like, jumps back. Oh, fuck you. No, fuck you. You're in here. We've got lots of friends here. There's my friend Bill Drith, was it? Yeah, I'm here. This sucks.
Starting point is 00:09:26 Yes, it's awful. Okay, that is going to bring us to Keychain. Keychain. Got any more healing potions? You know what to do. He canters over to Nyack. His antennae ears droop low in shock, and he says, No, my boy father, how could you?
Starting point is 00:09:45 You were supposed to be our wellness advisor. Woof, woof, woof. He growls at Reagan, and then he's going to use his once-a-day bonus brew ability to heal Nyack for 2D8 plus three. Whoa! Good dog. Well, healed is broken hard.
Starting point is 00:10:04 Would you look at that? How did you do that? Nyack, as you lay dying on the ground, what do you think you see in this land between as death comes for you? I think as Nyack lays dying, it almost feels like the shadows, the glooms, stalker that he's taken the mantle of, are encroaching and swallowing him. And he thinks about how he's been a shadow his whole life, a shadow for Jen's, the lesser man,
Starting point is 00:10:41 always waiting in the wings for his chance, and now his whole entire life has passed him by. But then he gets this healing from Keychain, and the shadows start falling away, and he feels like, now this is my time to take the lead, to take charge, I should run this spud fuckers.
Starting point is 00:11:05 He stands up, brushes the blood off, and says, clean up on aisle me. Jen's laugh so hard. Nyak instantly goes back to feeling small. yeah you're right that was stupid that was so dumb no i no it wasn't a good job yeah it was the joke
Starting point is 00:11:30 what do you what are you referring to not a joke it was so jangler ask yeah it was a joke you said clean up on aisle me what was yeah was that not a did you was it supposed to be serious you just meant so he meant it so earnestly it earnestly looks it on us it's just like what the fuck I don't know. He didn't want us to laugh at that? I know. I said I was giving him what he wanted.
Starting point is 00:11:58 I think maybe he's a zombie. Maybe he did die him of broken heart. Maybe he's never tried to be joking all along. Yeah. Okay, we shouldn't laugh at him. Never laugh at anything I say. Let's take him really seriously going forward. That was a very good statement.
Starting point is 00:12:20 So, Nyah, you come back to life. You pull these arrows from your chest, but notice that the wounds don't fully close up like they normally would after being healed. Your body still feels lithe and responsive, but just a little closer to death. Interesting. And that's because you now have the injured condition. Oh, wow. Which is a new thing I'm going to be trying for this campaign. It's a modified death save system inspired by Pathfinder.
Starting point is 00:12:48 When you go to zero HP, then come back, you get the injured condition. Now the next time you drop to zero and roll death saves, the DC goes up by 1D4. If you drop again, if you drop again, you become gravely injured. You get a scar of your choice, and the death save DC increases by another D4. Drop to zero a third time, you're at death's door. This time instead of rolling saves, you simply flip a coin to determine if you live or die. Or a DVD. He's obsessed with flipping coins.
Starting point is 00:13:15 It can be a DVD if one's handy, if you got one around. The injured condition lifts after a long rest or with a greater restoration spell. If this ends up being broken or not fun, I reserve the DM's wholly and eternal right to just stop using it. All right. Great. Do you want me to roll that healing? Yes.
Starting point is 00:13:33 You can roll the healing. Okay. An eight and a two? So 13. Great. All right. So you're back up with 13 HP. And that brings us to the Hellclopper's turn.
Starting point is 00:13:42 Oh, my God. You hear the Helclopper continuing to idle, waiting for its master to return. It takes a huge dump next to a grave. And that's just disrespectful. That's crazy. I was in there and it didn't happen. You hear it like Winnie's, but like a helicopter would. And then it readies in action.
Starting point is 00:14:02 And then we go to Stroud's first legendary action. We have put earbuds in Marina's ears. Yes. Marina's head down, earbuds in, not paying attention to Strach. But she is listening to a Manosphere podcast. No, she's not. It's called intermittent fasting. No.
Starting point is 00:14:21 Eighth and noon, you're allowed to drink. That doesn't do anything. Ice water with a pitch of salt. Curses. She's just viving in there. Strad actually still doesn't know if the marina outside is real or not. Onyx, how does interacting with a silent image work? Okay, physical interaction with the image reveals it to be an illusion, but that's physical interaction.
Starting point is 00:14:46 And I did it so that I think he would have to move. to interact with it. Great. So if he does physically interact with it, he'll see that he can pass through it. He can also take a study action if he, like, doesn't reach it to physically interact with it. He can also take a study action to examine the image and determine if it's an illusion with a investigation check.
Starting point is 00:15:06 So I'm going to say that this Marina is like holding her arms up to Straud. Yeah. And we'll say with this first legendary action, he closes the gap and gets to her. And then on his next legendary action, he will be able to. interact with her to see if she's real or not. Great. So Strad walks forward. Yes, Tatiana, you have come to your senses. Jen stifles a laugh.
Starting point is 00:15:32 I'm normal. I'm more normal than even is more. Let's see. And that is going to bring us to, oh, Donovitch's turn. From behind the altar, you see Donovic slowly stands. Where have you been? My fucking brother, I can't believe this guy. This is honestly so like him. Am I right? We don't know him that well.
Starting point is 00:15:55 I do. It is. It is. Either hiding under a mannequin or attacking me. He's always fiddling with that mannequin. I tell you what. Not anymore. I smile at Jones and Nyack.
Starting point is 00:16:09 That's our mannequin. I don't know. I don't know what these guys are saying are jokes anymore. He said, clean up on I'll me and say it was serious. I'm sorry Donovan Go on Can you help us Gil Reagan?
Starting point is 00:16:22 It seems I really hate this guy Listen He sighs and runs a hand Through his thin sweat-soaked hair I'm so sorry for hiding before I could not face the truth of my brother
Starting point is 00:16:35 But I must all know what has happened And stand up for the people of this town I cannot do much But if anyone needs healing I can channel the morning Lord's light How is everyone We all need healing I guess give it to...
Starting point is 00:16:48 I mean, I'm okay. I've got more than half my HP. I'm at 14. What are you at? 13. I'm good. Okay. He's just going to flip a coin
Starting point is 00:16:58 to decide who he likes more. You see the Donovic looks between you two. I'll say one to three is NIAC. Four to six is Jen. Okay. Jen's steps forward and kind of gives him like a nod to be like me, of course, but says aloud, just choose.
Starting point is 00:17:17 whoever you think is more worthy. Nyack stands up for himself. Normally he'd say Jen's, but he stands up for himself for the first time and says, either one of us is fine, whichever you choose. Jen shudders. I don't need it, but I want it.
Starting point is 00:17:35 You see, like, nods solemnly at that, but then turns to Nyack and says, clean up on aisle me. Never have truer words been spoken. What does that mean, though? What does it mean, though? It means to be cleaned of your sins. Don't you understand?
Starting point is 00:17:51 Okay. To rise again. No, that's great. That's great. I just feel like it's a good joke. It wasn't meant to be funny. Onyx, I don't know. I don't know what's up with him.
Starting point is 00:18:03 I'm so confused. He just said the most selfish thing I've ever heard him say, which is either one of us is fine. We are falling apart. We are falling apart. We are falling apart. Onyx starts crying. So he. heals you for nine points of healing. Wow. Yeah, you see like the candles kind of flare brightly
Starting point is 00:18:23 for a second as he channels the morning lord's glory in this holy place. But that glory is quickly undone as Straud takes his second legendary action. He's going to move again, reaching out towards Marina. But as he does, his arms go through her. That is so fucked up. That is so fucked up. Oh, look like she ghosted you. That was not a joke. No one laughed. That wasn't a joke. You're on fire right now.
Starting point is 00:18:54 Why don't you want the credit for it? Nyack, I don't know how to interact with you. I think I'm going to join strong. Okay. We are falling apart. We really are falling apart. Why are you saying funny stuff and so getting mad at us? They don't get me.
Starting point is 00:19:13 He's in a teenage phase. I think he's like 30, but he's in a teenage phase. He's trying to relate to Gen Z. I am not ghosted. I am the one who makes ghosts. This will not do. You've impressed me, Olegslubier. Your control of the mist is to be commended.
Starting point is 00:19:34 I shall yet let you live. But if you cease to entertain, I will discard you and let my witches fight over your corpse. Okay. Um, so now, after this very serious speech from Straud, it's the rats turn. Oh. More dancing. There's so many, there's so many non-vampires that I just didn't consider.
Starting point is 00:19:59 Uh, the rats are going to go after Onyx and Jens. Fuck. Let me guess which one of us will hit. There's just a bunch of them dancing up to onics and a bunch of them with like razor teeth charging at me. One is Muppets, and one is just, like, floodborne. Is that Rizzo from? I like the cut of her gym. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:23 See, he's kind of funny. Jins, an 11's going to miss you, and an 8 is going to miss Onyx. They're all dancing. They're so cute. They're not, yeah, they're fine. I think I have plague rats, but I think it's bad that they're in here. I don't think they're good. Yeah, you see the rats like circle you and they just kind of front.
Starting point is 00:20:46 They like flare their chest at you. Oh, hey. Easy, guys. Stop. They point at you. No. And then let's see, that is going to bring us to Marina. Ooh. On Marina's turn, you see, she feels bolstered by this potion of swiftness and prepares to flee.
Starting point is 00:21:06 Okay, Marina, wait until my turn because I have a chance to maybe cause a distraction. And then you can run. Okay, but I think that the time for running has not yet come. I will stand and I will fight. I do not need to be worthless here. I can help. And you see, she reaches for the thin ornate sword at her waist and pulls it out. You see, there's this beautiful silvered rapier.
Starting point is 00:21:37 She says, this belong to my mother. Which one? Alana. my adopted mother, the burgomaster's wife. Okay. She called it the Blade of Truth, and I think it will guide our way here. It's a Blade of Truth. I have a book called The Blade of Truth.
Starting point is 00:21:55 Yes, that's so crazy. Do we have the time for me to do that? Should I take a study action now? Should we have a study at these? I don't know. I can't even tell. Is it funny that there's a book in a sword that have the same name? I don't know what's funny anymore because Nyex being a fucking weirdo.
Starting point is 00:22:11 And it used to be my salad I think it's hilarious that there's a book Wait, okay, that's funny I don't know That's good The rats laugh What? Okay, if the rats think it's funny I don't think it's funny
Starting point is 00:22:24 And Marina is also Going to attack Reagan Please, let's kill this guy Everyone's fucking ganging up on me This is unfair You're in the goddamn church We've got pitchforks okay You know what, give me my fucking coat back
Starting point is 00:22:38 I want my coat back I want all my stuff back I'll trade you a coat for my stuff Oh, yeah, right, I love your stuff. Yeah, I love your coat. I can buy a new coat. It's from bonobos. Yeah, I can buy a new magical sword and all of my levels back.
Starting point is 00:22:50 Yeah, Roy, you fucking can't. Yeah, I know I can't. Bad bluff, bro. Let's see. Yes, the marina is going to take this silvered blade and attack Reagan. Oh, fuck. Shout out to the two crew. Yikes.
Starting point is 00:23:05 Oh, I'm so sorry I distracted you. It's okay. I was just thinking about the bull. book and the sword and how they're both called Blade of Truth. That's got to be something, right? I should have taken a study action. I should have taken his study action in school more. Yeah, it's kind of funny, I guess.
Starting point is 00:23:22 I don't know. I just don't know. Clean up on aisle me, what? Okay, so that is Marina's turn. She enters the fray, feeling confident, but she has not practiced as much with her sword as Ismark. Yes, Marina. Feel your primal manly instincts.
Starting point is 00:23:40 And then, And at Initiative Zero, you hear the sound of several shrieking ravens. We need to write. They're coming for the rats. Followed by a loud shout from the church hallway. Here comes the wine! Oh! Suddenly, you see three women in ornately trimmed dresses burst into the chapel,
Starting point is 00:24:07 riding a wagon full of wine barrels being pulled by Fitbit. Goodbye Fitbit Good boy Oh he Fitbit Kiss mommy on the mouth I don't know What
Starting point is 00:24:22 And a nuzzle for Uncle Nyack Oh no Oh no Very well Thank God you're here The soft launch It's been a disaster
Starting point is 00:24:34 Oh my God What is going on in here Okay we need to kill This one guy I think we can't kill anyone else but we can kill him, maybe. He looks pretty strong, but all right. Yeah, but there's so many of us.
Starting point is 00:24:47 It's true. You see, following behind them is a conspiracy of ravens. They kind of land on the women's shoulders and say, The ravens told us that something was happening, and we came as soon as we could. You see, Alinka, oldest of the wine moms, steps forward. Her feathery black hair flutters excitedly as she talks. Marina, babe, you can't give this man what he wants.
Starting point is 00:25:11 He's as rotten as they come And you can't make good wine with rotten grapes I tell you that for free She turns back to her sisters Mirabelle, Sorvia I know we're supposed to keep a low profile But I think our potential business partners Need our help
Starting point is 00:25:26 Should we lend a hand Or shall I say Feather? Yeah, I said so much Where it's going? They nod Then suddenly all three women's bodies begin to shift
Starting point is 00:25:39 Their faces elongate and throw shiny and black, and feathers sprout all over their bodies as the wine moms become wine-wear ravens. Yeah. Cock-call. Come on, girls. Let's save spot fuckers. So the wine ravens are going to enter the initiative.
Starting point is 00:25:57 Hell yes. And that brings us back to Onyx's turn. Okay. I have a plan. Bluetooth, go invisible again from your character sheet. I don't think there's a limit to it and then fly overhead and be ready to pick me up
Starting point is 00:26:16 I can't go invisible I've got too much Riz Okay Look at your character shoot I indulge you I indulge you all the time But right now I don't want to take a study action
Starting point is 00:26:28 I'm not asking you to I'm asking you to go invisible Okay fine I'm asking you to go stealth mode Okay that's cool You made it cool And then I'm going to cast mirror image on myself and I think with that because I still look like Marina my
Starting point is 00:26:46 disguise self lasts for an hour cool oh shit so then would would my duplicate self or my mirror image look like marinas I believe so okay so then I'm going to tackle Marina again you really don't need to get if you just tell me to get down I need to get you out of the way of the window um tackle Marina again cast mirror image so that I look like four marinas. And then I'm just going to start running out the church to try to get strad. And, well, I'm going to do a sexy run too and say, Strat, come get me.
Starting point is 00:27:22 It's me, Tatiana. I miss you. I remember your kisses, especially the ones in the nape of my neck and my inner side. Oh! Jens, she's doing a Baywatch run. And then me and all my mirror image marinas. are going to Baywatch Run. Marina does not talk like that.
Starting point is 00:27:45 Some people stand in the darkness. I simply cannot tell which is which. You see Stroud, for his legendary action, peeks through the window like a perv. But we're bursting out of the church. Okay, cool. And we're running. Okay, great.
Starting point is 00:28:02 That's your turn? Yeah. Awesome. Great turn. Let's see. That brings us to Dauru. Doro is still trapped outside with Strah. Oh, boy.
Starting point is 00:28:11 As soon as Straud sees you, like, leave through the window, Doro says, should I go after them? And Straud says, no. I grow bored of this affair. This party has gotten a bit too crowded for my liking. Besides, Tatiana has always played hard to get. But for me, the hunt. is half the fun.
Starting point is 00:28:43 Wait for me in the heliclobber, Doru. I shall be done soon. Then we can discuss your punishment. Doru looks stricken, then slinks over to the helicopter. And you see that Doru readies in action to wait for Straud, to give him a command. Now that is going to bring us to Jins.
Starting point is 00:29:04 All right, I'm sick of this guy. I'm just going to try to kill Reagan. Great. I'm just going to go up and take two swings at them. Oh, okay. 24 to hit. I got an 18. And then offhand, I got an at 20.
Starting point is 00:29:20 Ooh, hell yeah. Don't get too excited. I'm weak now. Yeah, that's why I ran. I don't even have a way to do damage anymore. Yeah. Okay. Ooh, actually I did quite well.
Starting point is 00:29:33 20 damage. Hell yeah. Nice. And then I'm going to, in the hopes of getting, him to attack and his giant nephew to attack. I'm going to look at Bill Drath and I'm going to be like aren't you tired of people like this pushing us around?
Starting point is 00:29:52 Yeah. I've been in Barovia for a day and I'm sick of it already. Yes, we're tired and extremely scared. I'm going to give Bartik Inspiration to Bill Drath. Oh shit. And hoping that if Bill Drath attacks his giant nephew also attacks and I just motion for everyone to swarm Reagan to murder him. Okay. Yeah, I like this.
Starting point is 00:30:13 Let's make it clean up on Isle Reagan, huh? That's funny. No, it wasn't. That was just cool. What was a play on what I said earlier, which was cool. All right, I'm rolling initiative for Bill Draft, and his nephew, whose name is Perry Wimple or Parple. Parple.
Starting point is 00:30:31 Okay, yeah, you see Bill Draft looks to Perry Wimple, his nephew, and says, it is true. Who else will exploit people who try to come and buy items from our shop if there are no people left? Perry Wimple, we must fight. We must fight for what we have. To sell people rope for 200 gold. Jen's cries so inspired. I love you, uncle.
Starting point is 00:30:56 All right, that's your turn. Now we come to Strad in the initiative. After seeing these four marinas fleeing out of the church, Strad laughs. then walks over to the church's door. You hear him muttering in a strange language that makes your eardrums tighten. And then a second later, a huge gust of wind blows the door off its hinges
Starting point is 00:31:24 and snuffs out every candle at the church's altar. Hey! Hey, you can't do that. Come on. Be civil. It took me so long to light those. Yeah, come on, give the guy a break. Strad holds up his hand in a gesture of farewell and says,
Starting point is 00:31:42 Reagan, I grow tired of these shenanigans. I leave this to your capable hands. He then looks over to Jens and Nyak and says, By the way, my offer still stands. You have the potential for greatness. I sense it, and I am never wrong. He points a finger in your direction, but you can't tell which person he's pointing at.
Starting point is 00:32:12 Obviously, Jens. Okay, obviously me, yeah. Okay, no, we got it. Yeah, Jens is right here. It's easier to point, yeah, I'll point at him. He grins, flashing his sharp white fangs one last time, then casually walks over to the Helclopper. Which was readying its action to take him,
Starting point is 00:32:32 and then they... blast up into the sky, you see this circle of flame engulfs them, and they're gone. And Strad has disengaged for now. This episode of NADPOT is brought to you by Squarespace. Your one-stop shop for grabbing domain names and then building beautiful, sexy, and dare I say it, important websites. It all starts with a domain search. Enter the word of your dreams, then watch as Squarespace, or Squaspack, as I like to call it for short, shows you all the available domains and their prices.
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Starting point is 00:33:42 of a website or domain. That's Squarespace.com slash Papa for the free trial and offer code Papa to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Okay, that's it for me. Thanks for listening. See ya. But Reagan remains? That's right. I can take you all on myself.
Starting point is 00:34:03 I've studied up for you. this moment. Yeah, right. He just replaced you with Doru, Reagan. I hate to say it. Him and Doru seem really close. I don't, what, because Doru can spit bars, just because Doru's got like rap sensibilities. Doru doesn't have, Doru is in the clopper. Yeah, you're in the house with us. Doru objectively cannot spit bars. I just, I want to be in the clopper too. I've never, he's never let me ride. It sucks. I'm his wellness advisor. I went to all that trouble to capture that wizard and steal his spells and then set up that whole fucking night load. Retreat and this is how he repays me
Starting point is 00:34:36 Capsed that wizard Is this why you had so few reviews At Night Lotus? I thought it was just because it was a new hotel Yeah, I had to write them all myself You know how many email addresses I had to make? Yeah Took fucking forever
Starting point is 00:34:49 This voices in them were quite similar We should have clocked that We just thought they were bots And we love it Yeah Yeah, it didn't realize it was you doing it It was cool when it was bots It was awesome
Starting point is 00:35:03 Flashback to you scrolling This hotel fucking rocks. I love this hotel. This hotel is unreal. Oh, good. They cared enough to pay for bots, so that much mean they care. Okay, so that was Straud's turn.
Starting point is 00:35:15 It is Reagan's turn now. He is fuming. He realizes he has failed, Straud, his master, and he must get into his good graces again. And you feel this kind of grave, maligned energy sort of start to pulse off of him. And as it does,
Starting point is 00:35:34 you hear the screams, tons and tons of screams. And everyone within 10 feet of Reagan is going to need to make a wisdom-saving throw as he casts deftly choir. I've killed many. You won't be the last either. Come join my choir. The marinas and Bluetooth are 30 feet away. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:58 Nice. I only got an 8. Nyak got an 18. 18. All right. Nyack, you pass. Where's the real marina, by the way? She's still, like, hiding in the view?
Starting point is 00:36:07 She's in there, yeah, yeah. Okay, cool. I'll say that you tackled her out of range of this. This is just everyone that's, like, directly in combat. I'm going to say that everyone that's engaged is Jens, Nyack, Keychain, and Ismark. So I'll roll for Ismark and Keychain, too. Cool. Keychain fails.
Starting point is 00:36:22 Ismark. Oh, Ismark would fail, but he's got his bless up for plus five, which makes him pass. Great. So everyone that failed is going to take. 3D10 psychic damage from this deathly choir. I'm for sure going to die. Jesus. Okay, it was low.
Starting point is 00:36:41 It's 16 damage. Dead. All right. And then eight for everyone that passed. Are keychain and Ismark still up? Keychain and Ismark are still up. Okay. But unfortunately, that is just Reagan's bonus action.
Starting point is 00:36:56 Oh, dear. For his action, you see him barrel roll back, knock another arrow to Nyax's bow and aim it at Ismark. Plenty of room left in your father's grave. Why don't you go join him? That is true. You can technically fit two corpses in there.
Starting point is 00:37:13 I don't know how I know that, but I know it. Okay, so this is a plus ten. This is a plus ten to hit. First one hits. Yikes. That's going to be 13 damage. He's going to take a second attack. hits as well.
Starting point is 00:37:33 That's another 12 damage. Izmark. You see that Ismark is at Death's Door. We were just starting to respect you. His leather doublet is fully fallen off and you can see his honestly pretty jacked body underneath. Yeah, geez, how much HP do you have? You don't have more than us, do you?
Starting point is 00:37:51 Jen's like self-conscious as the guy's not to die. Maybe I should have been in the oats. And that is going to bring us to the Wine Ravens and Bill Draft and Parple. Go, Parple. Avenge me.
Starting point is 00:38:08 I want hot dog. Okay, yeah. Reagan has hot dogs. So they are all going to launch at Reagan. So first attack, I'll say that Alinka and Mirabelle hit. Second attack, only
Starting point is 00:38:22 Alinka hits. So that's going to be three hits total. You see, they are all a little drunk from the wine. Sure, you've got to be. Honestly. make eye contact with one when they're in their, like, mid-animorph, and then I can't look at them afterwards
Starting point is 00:38:36 because it was too weird. What? What's wrong? Nothing. No, it's fine. Avenge me. That is 14 damage to Reagan. Reagan is starting to look a little hurt. You see that... Okay.
Starting point is 00:38:48 Yeah. His furious demeanor is getting even more aggressive. He's, like, twitching a little bit and clinching this bow. You see, he also starts to reach for a... sleek black-looking sword at his waist as well. Oh, you're going to make me use all my tricks, aren't you? That was kind of hot. I learned that from Dolu. What's the fuck?
Starting point is 00:39:14 Yeah, what the fuck? Let's just turn around. Why are all of my friends going nuts? What happened? He said one really toxic line. Jen's coughs of blood and just looks up at like the religious jewelry and just goes, What are my friends? What am I doing?
Starting point is 00:39:36 Bill Drath just takes a sack of potatoes and it's going to try and swing at Reagan. Cool. Not the potatoes! Wait, this smashed potatoes. Yes, you're going to go from spud to dud. How about that? It's pretty good.
Starting point is 00:39:53 It wasn't supposed to be funny. I looked to nigh out to see if I'm supposed to laugh. Why is nothing funny? That's not a joke. You're supposed to think that's hot the way you thought Reagan's life is hot. I don't think it's hot. He swings, misses,
Starting point is 00:40:07 knocks over a bunch of candles, his bag of potatoes, catches on fire. No! Oh, good. Crispy. Fuck, Purple, you go. Okay. Parple has gladiator stats.
Starting point is 00:40:19 Yeah. So he's going to make three melee attacks, which is nuts. Ho, ho. Damn, we should have got Parple in from the beginning. Can't believe Parple wasted so many turns.
Starting point is 00:40:31 You see, purple grabs like a rod that has like a banner of the Morning Lord hanging on it, spinted around expertly, like doing like spear dancing with it, and then stabs once into Reagan for 19 damage. Whoa!
Starting point is 00:40:48 Parpo, were you in color guard? We're going to give you the purple heart. Not a joke. I kill many wolves. Is that what you mean? They're colors inside them, I see. And with that fucking hit, Reagan is looking roughed up.
Starting point is 00:41:08 And that brings us to Nyack. Okay. No more soft shit. It's time to hard launch. Nyack kips up, flicks some blood off of his hand, and draws a bow. I'm going to bonus action, Zephyr. strike for advantage here. That's 23 to hit.
Starting point is 00:41:31 23 hits. I have one more favored foe. And I'm going to use my dread ambush or ability to take a second attack. Oh, baby, that's a 24. Both hit, who. Okay, 41 damage. Whoa!
Starting point is 00:41:49 Whoa! Nyack, you leap up onto one of these pews, balancing delicately, knocking arrows to your bow you see Reagan with panic and cruelty in his eyes says no one respects you even that little fucking blue freak doesn't respect you you'll always be there shadow
Starting point is 00:42:13 you'll never be the alpha never never and as he screams you feel this wave of deathly chorus erupt against you but you weather it and launch two arrows into him and Oh, fuck. Unreal. You guys fucking suck. I'm smart.
Starting point is 00:42:34 I'm smart for this. What? His last words were, I'm smart for this. I hope that's my last word. And Reagan falls. Thank God. Of all of the mean cutting things that he said to me, the one that landed the most was when he called Bluetooth the freak.
Starting point is 00:43:00 You leave him out of this. As Onyx and Bluetooth are fleeing, the hair on the back of his neck shivers a little bit, and he looks back and says, I feel like something cool just happened. I so, so quickly start looting Reagan's body. As he's saying his last words, I'm going through his pockets. Awesome. Yeah. So you start to loot Reagan's body.
Starting point is 00:43:25 Everyone breathes a huge sigh of relief. All of the villagers come out of their hiding places. Donovich starts healing everyone up. Jins, he brings you back up. Oh, thank God. Yes, the morning, Lord, keep you. You see Ismark and Marina share a hug. I was so worried.
Starting point is 00:43:43 You did so well, Marina. I'm proud. No, you, you truly were normal, Justin. Tetter than normal. It was so regular. Yeah. Ismark the above average, I would. after they hug they turn to you and say we have done it
Starting point is 00:44:04 I fear that strad was simply toying with us but we must take any victory we can where will you go now let me grab onyx real quick onyx I'm deeply in character and I've become Marina Tatiana Jens rubs his head. Wow. Just takes a full, like, 30 seconds to rub his head. As it goes, Marina. Marina.
Starting point is 00:44:37 I'm coming. We're coming. Okay, please come back. Is that what I sound like? I don't think I do, but let me close my, you know, I'll put the earbuds back in. Hello? Maybe I do. Okay, strange.
Starting point is 00:44:51 Bravo. Oh, no, I don't do voices. I just do. physical disguise. One time I was this guy named Porcar. You wouldn't get it. Suppose not. Have you heard of
Starting point is 00:45:07 the realm of Mobius? All right. Stories tell of one way past cool. Okay. Jenz looks at all of the blood on his armor. He looks out at the potatoes spilled everywhere.
Starting point is 00:45:25 and I just sit in a pew and just rub my temples. Actually, since Bluetooth is invisible, I'm going to go, he died. The Bluetooth died. No. We need him for the potativity scene. What? His last words were, I don't like, no, I.
Starting point is 00:45:45 Say it as he's soberina. All four of us are crap. I didn't have time to win him over. We saw him turn invisible. When did he die? Explain how he died. He died when he was invisible, Jen. He would come out of invisible.
Starting point is 00:46:05 Who was, no one was attacking them. Strad bit him. Strad, watching Straud the whole time. Oh, my God. What a way to go. He bit his head off? He bit his head off. And how did he say his last words if he didn't have a head?
Starting point is 00:46:21 I'm just curious. Began, I'm so sad. Trots bits her head off. out and from the ground the head said the last words. I don't like Nyak. He was thinking of me as he died.
Starting point is 00:46:35 It's so tragic and beautiful. Just kidding! And then Bluetooth is going to come out of invisibility and have been filming the whole prank. Oh! Oh, you're fucking fell for a lot. Nyak jumps up and down still crying.
Starting point is 00:46:52 It's a classic TikTok prank, really. about the level of cruelty as the other ones. Bluetooth spins around and then kicks gins in the shin. Ow! I almost died. I have to give him some stuff. Otherwise, he goes into grocery stores and spits on the produce. So this is like so much more innocent.
Starting point is 00:47:12 Yeah. No, that's good. We call it spitrous prunts. Okay. Yeah, he spits on the lemons and grapefruit. Oh, good, yeah. No, that's awesome. I'm really proud of your son.
Starting point is 00:47:22 I'm glad you're a boy mom. Okay. I know your son so well. May I eat him a lemon? I'm looking for the one lemon. I see Bluetooth kind of begrudgingly looks at you with respect. Now it gets short of breath and pats his pockets. But I offered and I don't think I have a lemon nearby.
Starting point is 00:47:45 That's a weird move. Was it a joke? Yes, I was kidding. It was a prank. It was a TikTok prank. It got me. Your love language. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:57 Lof language is TikTok friends. I want to get a slurper those pickled ghoul's tongues. Oh my God. Oh, did Reagan leave behind any stuff? Oh, yeah. What did you find? Yeah, like our weapons or anything? Yes, he did.
Starting point is 00:48:12 Okay. Would you like to investigate this? Yes, please. Yes. All right, yeah. So you rough up Reagan's body and you find a bunch of stuff. Jens, you find your two doing. Swilling sabers.
Starting point is 00:48:26 All right. One is made of shimmering white steel and bears a swirling pattern on the guard. And the other is jet black and has a guard shaped like a cage of thorny vines. One of these is the rebeckoning void.
Starting point is 00:48:38 Indeed. I don't remember which one. But Jens doesn't say that part out loud. He just goes my swords. I know them well. I won't let you make a study action. Nyack, you get your blackwing bow. Oh, my God. And Onyx, you get the Blood Moon Trident that you got from Moonstone.
Starting point is 00:48:59 Oh, okay. At odds with my build, but here we are. Also, Onyx, as you're rooting around, you find one more thing. Okay. You see a small jeweled key. When inserted into the air, this key casts the Lehmann's secret chest spell and gives you access to a storage box hidden away on the ethereal plane. An offshore bank?
Starting point is 00:49:25 Can we make a deposit? We are finally offshore bank rich. Is that a tax shelter in there? I don't have to pay taxes. We have a tax shelter. I always wondered how rich people did it. And it's a magic key. If you bank in the ethereal waters, you do not have to pay taxes.
Starting point is 00:49:46 It's true. Oh, my God. We're going to need those tax breaks. Jen says grimly looking at the potatoes that have fallen off the table. Those are write-offs. Okay. There you go. So, yes, you managed to find these weapons, but as you inspect them, you see that there's almost this sort of like mist leaking out of them, and they have kind of a dull sheen to them.
Starting point is 00:50:12 And it does seem as if Straud's magic has affected even these weapons and pulled some of their power from them. So they do look like they have the potential to regain. some of their lost power and perhaps awaken new abilities as well. But currently they're in sort of a depowered state as a result of the mist and the curse of Stroud. So as long as Straud retains influence over this land, the weapons won't be at their full power. Okay. And I will get you the stats for those later. Okay. But I will say now that Reagan has been defeated, you also can level up. Woo! Yes!
Starting point is 00:50:48 To level four. Oh boy. Oh my god. That's awesome. So as you are cleaning yourself up from the battle, you see, as Mark says, shall we retire to the mansion? I think I am ready to call this funeral complete. Yes. Yes. And... We should probably still bury the body first.
Starting point is 00:51:09 I think that you fell in the casket. Yes, I fell in. That's how I remember it, yes. Yes, okay. Let's quickly bury that, and then I will say the last rites, and then, yes, we could maybe retire. and have a private soft lunch potato party, yes? That makes a lot of sense, yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:26 A private event is actually good. It creates a lot of buzz and exclusivity. Awesome. So you all finally finish burying the burgomaster, and then you take the party over to the mansion. You see that the wine moms tag along, as does Donovich. Anyone else you want to invite, you all kind of cut loose and try out the spudfuckers potatoes
Starting point is 00:51:50 for the first time. I'll invite Jerko Sorry we were so hard on you It's okay, yeah I'm dependable I'm like an alarm clock You can count on me Yeah
Starting point is 00:52:00 Love that clock It's pretty cool Yeah I guess if I've become a phone You can be a O'clock Wow Reliable
Starting point is 00:52:08 Someone that people can count on Someone that can scream Really loud every hour Yeah 12 o'clock It's not 12 o'clock I've got a lot of work to do You only get one of those an hour
Starting point is 00:52:20 so you're on notice. Damn, okay. Great. So, yeah, you all dig into the potatoes. And as you're kind of relaxing and partying... These are only all right. It's honestly... These are fine.
Starting point is 00:52:34 It's missing something in a big way. Jen's eats a potato with a hot dog in it contemplatively. Or however you would say that. And I'm just looking off at the... red sun setting and I just look at onyx and now I can go I think we've been a little distracted by the spudfuckers thing we really got our asses kicked back there in a way that was super humiliating I have to be honest now that I'm a phone I'm just weak yeah no ismark like
Starting point is 00:53:13 did so much better than me back there I don't know if anyone noticed I don't I don't know if They did. Did you know, you're saying you're, that's an affirmative. I did notice that he's marked better than all of us. Okay. Yeah. I mean, he's attacking three times. Yeah, three times.
Starting point is 00:53:29 I was outright killed by my own bow. I also was just pretty much killed. And I think I just don't even do damage. And it's like, we're opening this restaurant, but at what cost? If we're not strong, then spud fuckers can't be strong. Yeah. And I think if I'm being. honest, like Bluetooth just isn't as strong as a weapon.
Starting point is 00:53:52 Yeah. I mean, maybe we need to, I mean, with the exception of Nyack, Onyx, maybe you and I need to get back to basics here. No. No? No? I think I'm just going to keep being weak. Gems rubs his head. I'm trying to just have any kind of moment with you guys.
Starting point is 00:54:14 Hey, if you need to get back to basics, though, that's such an important. to notice for yourself and I actually do I support that so much that's so cool of you to say Tatiana that's just that's just onyx right now not even dressed as Tatiana anymore and also Tatiana is what Straj says right it's Marina he was so convincing why why jens what are the basics that you want to get back to look all right this like one minute long dance thing I think it's not really working for me okay I think I'm going to go back to the sword play, all right? Dancing with swords.
Starting point is 00:54:52 Dancing with swords. But Jerko loved your dancing. I don't like Jerko. I would say like Jerko. Yeah. Isn't there a reason to stay as you are. I've kind of come around on a little bit in a way where it's just like, damn, the worst guy you know is actually a little bit cooler than you.
Starting point is 00:55:09 And so I'm really struggling with that. Jerko is still not cooler than me even. Four o'clock. Oh, damn. Missed it again. Yeah, that's eight hours off from what you said last time. It's been about 10 minutes, bud, so let's go ahead and do the math, different. You might, Jerko, you might have to leave.
Starting point is 00:55:25 Yeah, you might have to just go. Jens, do you want to try to dance with your swords on me to see if you still have it? You got your swords back? I think I need time before I can sword dance again, but I think there is no, I think we tried to launch the spudfuckers maybe before we were ready. I think spudfuckers will never know peace until Strudge is dead. Amen. If you are going to take up the blade, perhaps I could lend you mine. You fought bravely, and I think that it would be more capable in your hands.
Starting point is 00:56:01 She holds out this like silvered rapier. I totally forgot. Wait, okay, can I look at it? Can I take out my Blade of Truth book? Of course. I compare. Are there spices inscribed on that thing? So as you do this, you see,
Starting point is 00:56:18 Ismark says, like, oh, that reminds me. I will be right back. Oh, come on. Are you really going to go crank it right now? No. Are you going to go with your Blade of Truth? I wasn't going to have a victory goon, if that's what you're asking. That's fine.
Starting point is 00:56:35 That, yeah. We're not asking. Ismark shovels out of the room, his face reddening. And you inspect this blade as well as this book. And you see that. the blade at its hilt has kind of a blossoming silver sunflower shape on it. And you notice this same sort of like radiant sunflower on the Blade of Truth book that you got. It seems like there is some sort of correlation between the two.
Starting point is 00:57:05 Can I inspect the sunflower? See if it has anything to do with the morning lord or... Yes, you are making flowers, right? They put flowers in the grave, yeah. Oh, you know, I never really made a connection, but this is just something my mother used to do. She was a very crafty woman. Again, I only have very few memories of when I was young, but I was here whittling in her spare time, making me sunflowers. And they would bring a smile to my father's face.
Starting point is 00:57:36 Okay, I'm looking at this sunflower. I'm looking at this book. Like, what is in the Blade of Truth book? What does it talk about? So... I spears read it. You see that the Blade of Truth book, holy shit, she's taking it all in.
Starting point is 00:57:51 Her hand is moving so fast. It was written by the Olmists, who are these kind of like scholars of Straud initially. This is, of course, written from when he was just a simple human man. This details kind of their efforts to bring the morning lord's majesty and glory to the realm of Barovia, but via sciences and arts in various pursuits. Is Stragg a fucking alchemist who just used sort of alchemy to become immortal
Starting point is 00:58:23 and now he's a fucking vampire and he used to worship the morning lord? Or is he, was he punished in some cruel fate for bringing this god of mourning and sun to never see the sun again? Oh, that sounds more right. Onyx, as you read on, you do see that there are some chapters about healing and, like, chance and certain rituals you can do to try and heal people from curses and whatnot. Okay, I'm going to doggier those, even though this is an ancient book and probably should be better taken care of. Is anyone cursed? I shout out to the crowd.
Starting point is 00:59:06 You see that Alenka, Mirville, and Sorvi are like, we are cursed with a design. from one of these tasty potatoes. Okay, well, we don't want anybody getting healed from that. Yeah, I don't want to... Yeah, we don't want anyone getting healed from that. Okay, okay, so weaponize that, good, yes. Okay, Zen, I'm just going to tux this away, and later, if someone is cursed, we have rituals. Yeah, Marina, do you know how Straud's father died?
Starting point is 00:59:31 Stratt's father, let me roll a history check. Hmm, she got a seven. Okay. So she says, that is a very distant history of this land. My father did not wish to speak of the history of Strad, only of his tyranny. So I'm afraid I do not know much. Is Strad like the first vampire here? Yeah, I think so.
Starting point is 00:59:58 I think he invented it for himself. He was the first guy to drink blood. Such an innovator. He truly disrupted the space. A lot of zeal. sort of manosphere is like, okay, we have to take the blood of our children to stay young looking forever. So that's vampiric in nature. I'm thinking about either fasting or eating double my body weight and protein. I haven't decided which one. You see that Donovich perks up. He was kind
Starting point is 01:00:31 of drinking wine with the wine moms trying to relax and get over the despair of losing his brother Estrada. And he says, Perhaps you should visit the abbey of St. Markovia. There you might find knowledge as well as methods for healing and perhaps removing of curses. We are actually looking for that. And on our way, we add a vision of a cursed tree surrounded by graves. Do you have any idea, Donovic? Have you ever done a funeral on a mound of A cursed tree
Starting point is 01:01:07 You see that the wine moms spit They actually spit wine all over the floor Oh, right on the carpet And Fitbit starts licking it up You speak of the Gothaius tree The wicked druids and witches of strad They have raised this tree And it saps our vineyards
Starting point is 01:01:29 We have missed deliveries because of it It makes our grapes wither As it gathers power You must smite this wiki tree for us. We hate it. It's a bad tree. Okay, is there any chance that these witches are being controlled by Strad, but actually can be redeemed? Personally, I do not know.
Starting point is 01:01:50 They are nasty folk, and I do not like them. They have very pretty kitties and nice familiars. That is the only redeeming quality there. But they have done some really fucked up shit to the vineyards and the lands near us. So I cannot say. I look at Jerko. and then I think of cool witches who have cat familiars raising evil trees in the forest
Starting point is 01:02:09 and I'm just like, no, yeah, yeah, we'll take care of them. We're on your side. We're definitely on your side. I just rub my temples again, thinking about Is Mark being cooler than me. 14 o'clock. Yep, that's not a number. It's not Jericho.
Starting point is 01:02:28 Damn, so close that, Tom. Not really. So as you all discuss the possibilities of where you might go and where you are needed next. Ismark returns bearing the silver sunburst airloom that he promised you. And he says, Okay, as promised I have for you, the silver son, this relic of our family. No, I have the silver son.
Starting point is 01:02:52 I hold up my picture of the nipple. Excuse me again. Jen's laughs. Ismark shovels out of the room one more time. And then returns. And then he hands over this sunburst to you. And as he does, you hear something rattling around inside it. I crack it open.
Starting point is 01:03:17 Even Jen's gasp is at the call. May I? I break it over my knee. You want to break it? Yeah. Okay. I built stats in for this. Roll me four D-100s to see how much value goes down.
Starting point is 01:03:31 Okay. 18, 16, 78, 24. Okay, so you smash this family heirloom, reducing its value by 136. So now it's worth 264 gold, which is still nothing to sneeze at. It's still a big lump of silver. But really priceless. As you do, you see a small scroll falls out. Whoa.
Starting point is 01:04:04 Okay. And on the scroll, you see the words, the alchemical and culinary musings of Alana Petrovna, Olmast Scholar of the Tome. It's the secret spices. It's the secret herbs and spices. As you go to open the scroll, you see a small silver vial was actually hidden inside.
Starting point is 01:04:24 You uncork the vial and a strong but pleasing scent hits your nostrils. The vial is filled. with herbs and spices. Are you sure you want to give up on the restaurant? I don't want to give up on the restaurant. I just think the restaurant will not know peace until Strage is dead. I smell coriander. I smell paprika.
Starting point is 01:04:47 And I smell cash. And that's where we'll end our session. Woo! Thank you all so much for listening. We'll talk more about this over in our Patreon. Patreon.com slash Nadpod. That's N-A-D-D-D-P. EOD, don't sing it, don't do it.
Starting point is 01:05:05 We've got some things to plug. We've got Starstruck Live, Dimension 20 live show in Vegas in November. So we're on the lookout for that. Search Dimension 20 Live. The home of dice. Yeah. The original rollers. And I'll go and plug high cue.
Starting point is 01:05:23 It's a volleyball anime that I have been watching recently and it's fucking rocks. It's so good. It gets me filled with a competitive spirit. I did not know I had. It makes me want to play sports. It's weird. Whoa. But it's that good.
Starting point is 01:05:36 Let's get you on skates, brother. Ooh, hell yeah. Right on. And I'll plug substacks, specifically mine. And Emily's and Caldwells, too, while you're at it. Right on. Remember to follow Caldwells as a joke. Please do.
Starting point is 01:05:51 I'm going to post once to say thank you for getting the joke. Yeah. And with that, you can follow us on social media that we may or may not use at C.HR. Smey at Caldice, Caldwell, at Ashtra's Emily and at check or it's Jake, and you can talk about the show online using hashtag Nadpud. That's NADD-D-P-O-D. We are, we are, Youth of a Nation.
Starting point is 01:06:08 We are, we are, Youth of a Nation. Thank you. Well, well, well, would you look at that? It's time to thank our benevolent council of elders. And they are. Brad Dee, Jeffrey S. Lord of the Fjord. Later, Mick Skater, Matt M. Cutter W. Jeff C. Daniel G. Daniel, the dastardly name. Carpe Liam. Victor T. Balnor's boy. Hoyd's friend. Justin I, Danny Danster, T.J. M. Traylay, the Cray. Christopher B. Damiel R. Jordan L. Cyborg version of Josh the Cobald. Targot, Stevie Wags. Hellish rebuquer, the NBDMPHD.P.HR. Princess Yarr, Jory S. Jack L. Nicholas C. Star of every film ever made in Bohumia. Mike Hightower, Alka Smelzer, Plus, Great Value Gemma, Tyler F. Carborough, Chapel Hill, FPV. C.C. Lulu, Bald, Harc. Poirot, the rabbit folk detective. Timi R. Jake's jerk jelly, hashtag CCC. Cass, skateboard, Cass. Stephen, Bowie is Seattle's hockey mascot, you see. Mike K. Nick W. William W. Big Bad Beardo, the mad. Eric McD., Anorama,
Starting point is 01:08:18 Percival, Frederick Stein by Muscle, Kloowski, DiGrolo, the third. Jay Dragonborn, Guardian of the vibe, honoring the cock, impressive, Dongle, Ben A, Dave H, Dustin S, not that Nick, Danny F, Hawkeye, Pierce, Bookbar's assistant, Izzy F, Big Bad John, DPC is awesome. Sean, the shade tree mechanic of Zelbaldar, Summer RG, Mark, the Dark Lord's Taint, Cat C, Mesa of House and Zunza, Ariel, the occasional mermaid, Selena N, aka Valaci Raptor, Be Perky Always, Pat L, Lauren H, Serve 16, Annie, the Faywild Therapist, Parogi, Forenzy, Salil, Bioquart 7, Amber Dexterous, Bean Rat was innocent, Trub, Hop-dropper. Jack H. King of the Mole People under Iron Deep, dressed in blue and fighting his way through a bracket-style tournament. Valin. Paj, the bitch and bunny bard. Druidic Payton. Carlin C. Noah, the bully-wug boy. Hashtaghan, honor the cock. James G. Everything Bego. The Ladron who just wants to hang out with his pet badger, stripy. Reverend Chatterbones. Han, Eric B.
Starting point is 01:09:21 Marcos, Ph.D., eventually. Learns the balanced druid. Frida M. Maggie. Holly, the green laughing hyena. Cal and her cats, Portland star, and of course, Berlin. Aaron, B, Russell, H. A monk named Dilgo. Yes, the whole thing. Yes, every time. Cody C. Lorelei, the succubi, and Kira, the succulent snack. McKenna, stout. Your friendly neighborhood, Yont and uncle, Andrew and Sid. Soon to be education specialist, John Adams. Meg, the mail carrier of Bohumia, James F. Wayfarer now has to do something with the trolls. Get rid of them. Turned to page 42. Keep them. Turn to page 69. Barpo Good Barrel Bard, Barian, Garrett G, One Big Curd, Charlie Brown's best friend, Renee, the monster captain, Olivia, the enchanting Bard and Jared the Soap Opera Cleric are now performing ballads from the Age of Stories.
Starting point is 01:10:10 Blue, Ash, Fico, Garrett the Artifister, Anthony, the raddest of dudes, Jay, the fairies have returned to debauchery and must now go to the Carnal Corner. Cantrip Dumbledore, the Bear Wensy Wernsey Wearing Barbarian, Lexi H, MJ, the BFG, Roger L, Nodrog, the Pacifist Barbarian. Luca, Shenedigans O'Connor, Meos the Great, Joshua S, Alexander, Linz W, Sky the Wise, aka the lone dungeon master, Johnny Dude K, The Mischiff of Nadpods, Familiers, Pavu Eskynor, the Goliath Paladin, providing service with a smile, Kit and their cat, Jake Well, Murphily, Tim M, Dragon Knight, 86, Tiles L, T R, MLG, Cheeto, Chelby, Kenna's first favorite sprite girl, very cool way to honor Beardsley's baby with a quangle, loved seeing y'all, in my hometown. Jet S. Snailus, who is infecting Worcestershire for Within. Vegan, roll by Taylor,
Starting point is 01:11:05 Jared and Olivia, who want a Nadpod cookbook. Meemaw, Sky Days, Megan N. Anthony B. Balnor's best friend, Steve, Stephanie of House and Zunza. Benjamin A. Gimley the Corgi, Paw and Foster's K-9 friend. Mickle A. Josh H. Pilot of the Nightmareverse Flight. The two crew blew through. Kelsey A. Ethan the Mailman. Maple the shy bookworm. Ashosaurus. Seth. The stroker, bearer of all hog-related burdens. Billy, B. Torrey, the tungsten, drug goose, accidental shareer of recipes. Michael L.S. the second. Carl B. Plummer of the Realm. Dex, Riddlewell.
Starting point is 01:11:40 Ace Dreg's, High Lord of Critsburg. Vin Diagram. Catamilius, the Consumed. Clinton P. Cam, the vampire, frogman. Dean. Jake W. Hi, Mom. Tuesday, Cross. Only here for the surf and mirf. Dave, Natpod, saved my life, but stole my wife. Oh. Steve L. Tyler Mick M. Alex G, Zibby DeBackery, Kaylee,
Starting point is 01:12:01 Catarina C, Misty, the crispy kitty really hates flame skulls. Great W. There's so many of us now, but hey, you're doing great and we love you. Thanks, love you too. Baruch, Thunderhelm, 5th Generation Minotaur, working as an abandoned labyrinth tour guide. Chupac Aubrey, Boney is Dead, The Waterworth, Nick, Amy, Agus Kunari, Ignition Class Petal Storm, Charlemaine, Not the God, DJ Dramameen, Alrek von Zauravich, my favorite patron makes me say penis on my shirt, show, Chef Julie B, Jen the Rowdy, Caitlin H, and of course, buttwax.
Starting point is 01:12:33 Thank you, everybody. That was a hate gum podcast.

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