Not Gonna Lie with Kylie Kelce - Kylie on Horrors of Postpartum Bathing Suits, Ellie Got Covered In Butt Paste & Beating Jason at Golf | Ep. 69

Episode Date: June 4, 2026

Kylie’s back for her SOLO Summertime Spectacular episode of Not Gonna Lie brought to you by Pull Ups! She kicks things off by reacting to her latest Jeopardy! namedrop and refusing to watch Love Island with Queen Emma (1:50). In a brand new edition of “You Know What’s F*cked Up?” Kylie goes off on the feeling of putting on a bathing suit postpartum and how challenging that can be for anyone who has had children (4:21). Kylie talks about the types of bathing suits she prefers now and reveals a very specific insecurity about her bellybutton. Then, Kylie talks about her and Jason’s charity golf tournament and where they ended up placing (9:32). She also answers a bunch of questions from the Real Ones about summer camp for the girls, Bennie eating food covered in sand and Jason’s best and worst habits around the house (21:50). Kylie also gets to a stacked doomscroll of the week featuring the best TikTok about fad diets and “skinny culture” ever (29:57). She reacts to a toddler’s fantastic dancing (33:45), pregnant women who are over everyone’s comments (35:54) and a little girl who managed to cover herself in vaseline (39:02). Kylie does a part two of “Ask Me *Some* Things” featuring questions about how the girls feel about fame, marriage ultimatums and if the Kelce girls have nicknames for each other (42:09). Also on behalf of parents everywhere welcoming their teens home from school full time this summer, Kylie takes a crash course on Gen Alpha slang because WTF is mogging (50:02)?! You can find even more clips from Kylie’s longer solo episode recording on our YouTube channel on More Sh*t Monday. . . . Purchase Brand New NGL Merch: https://www.nglkylie.com Support the show: Pull-Ups: Buy new Pull-Ups with Learning Layer now, designed to help kids learn wet from dry! https://pullups.com    DoorDash: When life gets crazy, DoorDash helps bring some order to it. Order Now. https://www.doordash.com/ CVS: Go to https://www.CVS.com/app to learn more and download the app now. Allstate: Check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You’re in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary. Subject to terms, conditions, & availability. Allstate North American Ins. Co. & affiliates: Northbrook, IL. Peloton: Let yourself run, lift, fail, try and go. Explore the new Peloton Cross Training Tread+ at https://onepeloton.com  Apple Pay: Apple Pay makes it simple. Shop Apple Pay. Terms apply. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Who was it that was covered in butt paste? Who was it? I don't want to watch Love Island? My belly button? Have you ever seen the lip of a rhinoceros? I have so many pictures of shit in my phone. It's not even funny. Tirds.

My favorite habit of Jason's is that when he walks past me, typically he does feel a need to touch my butt. Not gonna lie, this is our 69th episode, and I'm not mature enough to let that go by without acknowledging it. Let's get this podcast started. Welcome, Real Ones, to a very summary, very unhinged, and most importantly, very solo episode of Not Gonna Lie. A Wave Original brought to you by pull-ups. I'm your host, Kylie Kelsey.

My favorite summer job growing up was... I love when I do this, and I don't think of one ahead of time, but I just raw dog it. I was a lifeguard, a lifeguard. I was more of like a pool attendant. But occasionally, when there was not a lifeguard on duty, I would have to also double as a lifeguard. And so I did, I think, one training on how to tow someone who was unconscious out of the water. But I don't. And I was CPR certified.

But besides that, good luck. I've never seen an episode of Love Island, but Queen Emma is determined to change that. and she's not going to. Who has enough time for that? Love Island USA premieres tonight. Queen Emma wants to know if we should order some bunk cakes and a tomato pie and binge that shit.

No, we shouldn't. No, because I'm busy doing a lot of other things. I'm not so. Six days a week. That's dumb. I don't mean that in a disrespectful way. I just mean like that's crazy. And apparently

Jeopardy is finally running out of ideas because I was the answer to yet another question. This time, it was pop culture Jeopardy. She married into America's favorite football family and shares about white. Hold up. Big bearded hubby. I'm not going to lie. Ben, who is Taylor? No. Helena. Helena, I was going to say thank you, but also, Helena, shout out to you for knowing my name. But also, guys, we got to cut this out. I do think it's funny that they described Jason as the bearded hub, big bearded hubby. He is a large man. He is bearded and he is my hubby. So honestly, yes. And to be clear, I do, shout out to Helena. I appreciate it. But also,

I do prefer when the answer is unknown. I liked it better. It felt comfier for some reason. Well, now that my second Jeopardy cameo in as many weeks has been addressed, let's get into today's summertime solo spectacular. Really? That's what we're calling it? I thought you were going to hit the butt. As is traditional on solo episodes, I'm going to answer as many of the real ones ask me some things questions as I can. And as always, there were some absolutely insane ones in the mix.

Honestly, should I just answer them? I don't know. Let's see. We also have a stacked doom scroll, including a clip of a little kid who got Vaseline all over her hair and the return of our tiny O-Lineman. The ribet, rib-ep, toddler. Yeah, I'm so excited. And in preparation for everyone's teenagers being home for the summer, we're all going to get a gen alpha slang crash course because what is magging? What is that? I don't know, but we're going to find out. But before we get into any of that, let's start off with, you know what's fucked up? Hey, you know what's fucked up the feeling of putting on a bathing suit postpartum? Do you remember?

Maybe this isn't like a universal experience, so bear with me here. Do you remember when you were, I don't know, let's say, 17, 18, 21? And you put on a little bikini and you're, you know, doing your thing on the beach, playing games, bopping around, doing all this stuff. You could put on any bikini and you'd be like, yeah, that's it. Or, ooh, that's a cute pattern. I want that bathing suit. Ooh, I like that bikini.

Ooh, I like that bathing suit. That was a fun time. I don't do that anymore. Let me tell you why. Because I need tummy control. You know what I mean. I need something that covers my belly button because here's a true confession. So you want to knock on a lie, not going to lie, I had my belly button pierced.

And it stretched out with the rest of my belly while I was making human beings. And then it never went back. And I, it is truly something that. bothers me so much. So much. I don't like seeing my belly button. I don't like seeing my belly button in bathing suits. I very much feel strongly that I might like a high-waisted bikini bottom that only gives me a little gap of belly, stomach, whatever you want to call it, before the bathing suit top. But since I'm so tall, it's hard to find a bathing suit bottom that goes up to the top of my belly button. And let me tell you, my belly button, have you ever seen the lip of a

rhinoceros? We'll pop a photo of a rhinoceros in right here. That's what the top of my belly button looks like. So would you want that to be out and about? I have made it a point to say to myself that my body has made for human beings. And you have to give yourself grace. You must. That being said, it's okay to mature in your bathing suit choices if that's what makes you feel comfortable. Now, this summer, I ordered a little skirt bottom because I thought I'd test that out because I've seen other women on the beach in the little skirt bottoms and I thought, you know what? They're killing it. That looks really cute.

It sucks. We talked about this so many times and I'll say it until the end of time. It sucks dressing yourself after you give birth. It doesn't matter how much grace you've given yourself. It doesn't matter how much you love what your body has done. It is hard to look at your body that does not look like your body that you have lived with your whole life. It is changed in a way that is permanent. And now you have to figure out how to dress it, not only in regular clothing, but also in bathing suits. That sucks. That sucks. And we should call it out and say that it sucks out loud so that we can all just be like, hey, this sucks. But here's what I will tell you.

When you are going on vacation, out to a beach, to the pool, the person who is the most concerned about what you look like in your bathing suit is you. Other people are not going to be highly bothered by your bathing suit or how you look in it. They're also not going to be nearly as critical. We need to be more gentle on ourselves and not let bathing suits be the thing that hold us back from enjoying summer activities. Okay. Promise. Okay.

Queen Emma is asking, I have been freshly postpartum both in the fall and in the spring, which do I prefer? For baby purposes, I prefer to be freshly postpartum in the spring because you get to be outside. You get to get fresher. You get to do outdoor naps.

You get to do walks outside. For dressing purposes and self-confidence, the freaking fall. Put me in a big ass sweater. One that goes down below my butt. I mean tunics for days. Okay?

Because then you can't see the outline of my diaper. That does it for you know what's fucked up. Next, the latest place is Kylie had some business being brought to you by pull-ups. Yesterday, I had some business participating in our family's underdog charity golf outing. Yeah. As everyone who saw the newest FAAFO knows, I've been prepping to kick my husband's ass at this event. Did I? Oh.

I don't know. Here's the deal. For those of you who don't know golf, I will tell you our golf outing was what's called a scramble. For anyone who is thinking about getting into golf or learning golf, a scramble is a great way to do it. It is essentially that you work your way through each hole with the best ball. And it's great because you all get to continue to practice and take hits, but you are getting through it pretty quickly and scoring the best because if you hit it into the woods, you don't necessarily have to get it out of the woods. I have no idea what I scored because we were

in a scramble and I have no idea what he scored because we were in a scramble. What I do know is, is that we had a dream team. My team placed second in the whole thing. Where did Jason's team place? I have no idea because he wasn't in the top three so his team wasn't announced. Yeah. How about that. Did I happy Gilmore swing? Yes, I did. I have found that if I try to correct my field hockey swing into golf, it's not as smooth. So I have defaulted into Jesus taking the wheel on a field hockey swing with a golf club. And I'm okay with that. We had so many people come out to the event. It was, we're so grateful to the brands who partnered with us to sponsor the event. We're so grateful to the celebs that we had out. We had a number of Flyers players, a number of Phillies players.

We had former Eagles players. We were able to raise money for B-Filly, which is our family Foundation that puts money back into programs impacting the youth of Philadelphia and making sure that they have not only resources, but support from their community. So we are very, very excited. Speaking of supporting a great cause, we had a few adoptable animals on the last NGL and FAFO episodes. And we've heard that Star and River have been adopted. Yes. Woohoo. That's two out of of four people, two out of four, which means we're halfway there. Someone needs to go get Fee and bright eyes. Should we do an animal segment once a month? Maybe we could do more exotic animals next time.

I did see that the PSPCA just rescued some chickens. Maybe we could get a guinea pig or a rabbit or maybe a turtle. Simon wants one. I just know in my heart. That's it for places, Kylie, has some business being brought to you by pull-ups. Next, I'm going to get right into it and answer a ton of real-one questions in a summer-themed ask me some things, because ask me anything was far too open-ended for some of you, crazy mother. Hmm. First up from Mags 4991. Are the girls going to any camps this summer? Yes, they are. They will be doing some multi-sport camps. Benny will be playing some soccer. Well, I shouldn't say that.

Benny signed up for a soccer camp and she will attend the soccer camp. Will she play soccer? We'll find out together. All of the camps that they're doing are sort of like a 9 to 12 situation for maybe four days. So I like to sprinkle them in there because then there's something to look forward to. And then if they don't like it, which we have not yet experienced them, not enjoying camp, they've loved it every time. but if there was a situation where they didn't enjoy it, then it would only be a couple more days. Because we're firmly in the camp of making sure that they finish what they start.

I grew up going to sports camps. I feel like it's a great opportunity to fill up some of your summertime and give a little more structure. But also, I'm not the type of person who did sleepaway camp. I'm not sending my kids to eight weeks to summer camp because I'm still really sad that they have to go to school every day. So I at least get them for the summer. How about that? Next one is actually a very important update. Are you two out of four in getting to kindergarten without expulsions?

Thank you so much for saying that. I'm two for two. Way to go, Ellie. Ellie made it out of preschool without getting kicked out like her father and her uncle. I really do think the true test is going to be two years from now when Benny gets to hit that threshold if she makes it there. And that's the key. Wyatt loved kindergarten. I think Ellie is also going to love kindergarten. But I do think that it is going to be a little eye-opening for her because she is not quite into academics in the same way that Wyatt is. Why it is into academic?

because Wyatt has this need to know and this thirst for knowledge that is, it's incredible to watch. Ellie is curious, but she doesn't quite feel the need to press as hard as Wyatt does to get information. And that does translate into academics. Ellie wants to go and be social. And I am going to be shocked if she can sit in her chair for that long. Next from Lynn Kat Webb. Best part of summer with kids and worst part of summer with kids go. This is such a good one.

Best part of summer with kids, having them home. I love having my kids home. I love. No. Ooh, I know. Oh, not having to make lunches. Good God. Oh my God.

Having to make lunch, it takes some serious brain power. I also like on days where we don't have anything to do, not forcing everyone to immediately get up and get out of their pajamas and get dressed and really go full-fledged into the day. I would say those are the best things. The worst things about summer, oh, when it's too hot, you can't go outside. I am an outside kid. You guys, the real ones who have been listening since the beginning, no, I'm a bug kid. I like to go outside. I like to flip rocks.

I like to dig in the garden and find some earthworms. I like to pick up the roly pullies and let them crawl all over your hands. I like to go out at dusk and catch the lightning bugs and let them crawl out to the top of your finger because, you know, they always go to the highest point. If you're a real bug kid, you know that. Anyway, I love going outside. So when it gets too hot, that sucks. I want to go outside. I want to go outside.

I want to play. Even if it's just in the morning or just in the afternoon. but sometimes in the Philadelphia area, we hit a hot spell of like 95 degree days and you open the door in the morning at, I'm not exaggerating, 7 a.m. It's 100% humidity and 85 degrees already. And you're like, you can suck my ass. I'm not going outside. Absolutely not. Because it sucks for you, but then on top of that, you're going to have at least two of your four children complaining at you that it's too hot and it's sticky. Soupy.

The air gets soupy around here. If you've never experienced that, I'm happy for you. But it gets soupy and it's gross and I don't like it. That's what I don't like about summer. I feel like I nail that question. I don't say that often, so yeah, good job. Okay. Number four from Real One,

Corabelle Hope. Are you more of a stay in the sand girl or let's get in the water girl at the beach? See? You got me here. You got me. I'm a can't sit still. Remember back when I said Ellie is like her mother and she's a little ants in her pants. That's me on the beach. I like to dig in the sand and play with the toys. And then I like to go down to the water and jump the waves. Now, when it comes to my kids, they also don't like to sit still. They know that they have to go with an adult. So usually it's a full squad activity. If everyone's going to the water, everyone's going to the water. And if everyone's back playing in the sand, everybody's back playing in the sand. What I will say about the kids is that I don't know that there are enough snacks in the world to cover us for five hours on the beach.

So you can catch us at any given point. Someone is eating a snack. Are their hands covered in sand? Yes. Is their snack unusually? crunchy from sand. Also, yes. Are they going to be pissed about it? For the first week that we're at the shore, yes. After that, sand is part of their diet. There was a phase where Benny actually used to take peanut butter puffs and dip them in the sand before she ate them,

which was disgusting to watch. And I tried to stop it. And then I gave up. Jason doesn't love the ocean. he's talked about it multiple times. He's not a shark guy. So he does not like the ocean, but he still will do it. He'll bite the bullet and he'll go in. But I think he likes to make sure that there's at least a couple people further out than him. And that's, I respect that. Next up from Kaylee in the Stars. What is your favorite and least favorite habit of Jason's? I would say my favorite habit of Jason's is that when he walks past me, typically he does feel a need to touch my butt. I like it. It's part of my love language.

Physical touch. I like it. My least favorite habit of Jason's, it's always, I always have the same complaint about my husband. When I was on the other podcast, I said the same thing. He's loud. He's a loud human being. He wears flip flops. I mean, you've seen him. He wears flip flops everywhere. And he smacks him when he walks up the steps. He's just a loud individual. And the funny thing is, is that some days when the baby's sleeping or he gets up early, I'll be like, can you just be quiet? Bo boom, boom, boom. I'm like the fuck. There's no way as athletic as you are that you don't know how to bend your knees and soften your steps. You sound like a herd of elephants. And not only that, it's not only his. steps and now I'm really going off. It's just the reason I don't say like, oh, he walks so loudly.

He's just a loud person. There are mornings where he will be laying in bed and I will already be downstairs and I'll hear. And I can hear it from the kitchen. Guys, our house isn't that big, but like if I can hear it like he's standing next to me, that's loud. That's loud. He sneezes loudly, but only when you need him to be quiet. He's a loud person and I love him for it. It's entertaining. I can't pinpoint that many things that my husband does that is like a least favorite habit of mine. But being loud. He's a loud guy. But he can make up for it by touching my butt. All right. Last one of the real one questions for Ask Me Some Things Part 1. Sarah Martin wants to know any of your kids biteers or hitters. Child number three is built different and always humbling.

We went through some biting phases, both biting me and their sisters. The one thing that I did to discourage biting was screaming cry. I feel like I talked about this recently. Did I not? Or did I talk about it with you? Well, we did it on the podcast when I told you that. Simon will hit me with his toy. Still happening, by the way.

Yeah. So the screaming crime is not working? No. Maybe you're just not that good of an actor. I guess not. We were always a, if something happened, we sold that it was the saddest thing to ever happen and it really hurt. Sometimes it's really helpful to figure out what the purpose of the biting is. I have found that a lot of times it is based in frustration that stems from them not being able to get their point across.

So a lot of times it required more conversation, which sometimes when you start explaining things or breaking things down with kids, it feels like it's silly. you start talking to a kid who can't even communicate enough to get their point across to the point that they're getting so pissed, they're biting people. And you're then bent down like, if you feel like you're going to bite your sister, can you walk away, please? Or can we pick something else to do? Or can you say, I'm mad? Or can you ask for something nicely?

And it's like, well, it's, It's difficult. And it requires, I think, a lot of persistence. Honestly, sometimes it's a matter of catching them before they get there. Ellie went through a hitting phase, which she still sometimes does, where she just gets so mad with Wyatt. Because Wyatt will do things to sort of stir the pot. And Ellie will do this really deep, like, and then she, like, cocks back and, like, goes over

and tries to like punch her. Sometimes it's just a matter of catching them before they're able to do it. Like sometimes Ellie will get really frustrated with a no from me. And then she'll sort of like put her hand back and I'm like, make a good choice. And if you just interrupt them before they do it, they can have a moment to check themselves. And then she'll like put her hands down by her side and like really like, ah. And I'm like, that's acceptable. And also time out, immediately time out.

And don't just put them in time out. You got to put them in time out and then explain to them why they're in time out, which again gets us right back to the talking it out, which is time consuming. So good luck with the biting. That was asked me some things part one. I'll be right back after I rave about pull-ups and some of my other favorite things. As a mom of four kids, six and under, I've been deep in the potty training trenches. It was really daunting to try and start, but when I knew we were ready, we were ready.

And how did I find that out? Because Wyatt told me, of course. Was there once an accident on the kitchen floor? And I'm not talking about a number one. Yes. But we cleaned that up and we moved on. And with each one, it kind of got easier because they saw their sisters doing it. And then there was motivation.

My secret weapon is pull-ups training pants. We've been using them the entire time we've been potty training. Because I'm not down for the naked weekend or locking yourself in the house. I don't think we're candidates for that. The best part, my secret weapon has its own secret weapon. Pull-ups just introduced the new learning layer, and I'm all about this. It's designed to help kids learn the difference between feeling wet and dry. That means that when they have an accident, they feel that it's uncomfortable, and obviously,

they don't want to feel that way. It's going to be so helpful with Finn. I just know it. The new learning layer helps create progress without the stress of the mess. It gives my tiny human's big kid confidence while I get the peace of mind of up to 100% leak-free protection. Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on cards. insurance. Not checking the girl's school emails before packing lunches. Apparently, it's a half day.

And I didn't need to put energy into one more thing. Yeah, so check Allstate first. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability, Allstate North American insurance company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. As a busy mom, taking care of everybody else's schedule, it's important to carve out just a little bit of what I like to call. Nobody needs me time. One way I use that very small window of time. these days is by doing a workout right in the Peloton app. I really have been enjoying a little walk-run action because you can do it either on the tread or outside. It's lovely. Peloton helps you unlock that joy through movement with their new cross-training tread plus powered by Peloton IQ. It provides intelligent

strength coaching so you can stay in the moment. Peloton IQ sees every rep, reads every movement, and coaches you through it in real time. I love every instructor that I've taken on Peloton. Who did I take this morning. Let me tell you the class I took this morning for funzies. Isn't this fun? I can just go in my Peloton out and say, who did I take today? I took John Hosking, 45-minute walk run. He was lovely because he did the same thing Alex Toussaint has a habit of doing for me on the bike. When I wanted to put the dial back a little bit, he said, nope, keep going. And I said, can he hear my inner thoughts? Let yourself run, run, lift, sculpt push, and go. Exploom the new Peloton Cross Training Tread Plus at Onepelaton.com. And I'm back. And so is a brand new edition of Doon Scroll the week. First up, Ticktokker at Beyond

Shandra. Just introduce me to the only type of high protein diet I can get behind. Queen Emma are lightly seasoned because they are super light. Filly cheese steak and this is basically a salad. Because this is protein, we're going to hold it over my head so that it be high protein. Okay, that's high protein. We're also going to just watch the carbs on this one. All right. And then let's see how light this mayo is. And it is cut in half, so I did cut the calories,

and we are still going to use this as heavy lifting, and so it's going to be high-intensity workout. The more you chew, the less you eat. I'm going to eat from both ends, and this is going to be a balanced diet. That, balanced diet. I can barely finish, so I have a lot left for tomorrow. Calorie deficit. I can't. Okay, let me tell you about Chandra. I don't even know where to start. I've seen so many of her videos at this point. I love them so much. We have gotten into this culture online of, I don't even know how to describe it. We've gotten into this culture online of idolizing these people who have their entire lives wrapped up in how they can cut corners on.

calories for exercise and as much as I really value people prioritizing their health and well-being I think there is a problem with social media is that it gives everybody the opportunity it's the catch-22 of social media social media allows people to connect and have a voice and share their thoughts and feelings and that's great. And then the other side of that is that people have the opportunity to share their thoughts and feelings and their opinions on things. And essentially, it can either be a positive or a negative. And she is making light of what is currently this fad of being able to cut calories and being in a calorie deficit and having balanced meals. And so making light of that in the way that she is is so fucking funny for our audio

listener. She held up a cheese steak that was a cheese steak hoagy, which means it has lettuce, tomatoes on it. And so she said it's basically a salad, which is correct. I think sometimes it's fun to poke fun at the fact that we don't all have to live our lives the exact same way. and with all of the high protein snacks, the high protein chips, the high protein this, the high protein that, the high protein drinks. I think it's okay. Also, the idea of cutting the calories, aka cutting your sandwich in half, perfect. Perfect, perfect, perfect.

No notes. I am fearful of the fact that we are, it seems to be that we are in a phase of idolizing super skinny right now. And we were in that phase in what, the late 90s, I would say, where it was models that you saw walking in like runway shows and ads in magazines and things like that were so thin that you could see their hip bones protruding and that you could just see like everything was so chiseled that people looked almost emaciated. And we're kind of leaning back. into that right now as if that is the ideal beauty standard. And I just want people to remember that

you, we aren't all meant to look alike. We aren't. We aren't all meant to be the same size. We are not all meant to be rail fin. We are not all meant to be the, what is, whatever the, whatever the ideal beauty size is at that point, at any given time. Because people, people, seem to think that that they should conform themselves to that. We're not meant to be the same size. Guys, my mother is five foot two. We are not meant to be the same size. I am 511.

Do you know what I'm saying? Next up, my favorite mini offensive lineman who did the rebet video is back in my doom scroll. And guys, this time he's got some dance moves. Everyone needs to say, Queen Emma the clip, please. What are you listening to? First of all, he's having a silent disco. And he is,

just flailing, jumping. Oh, my gosh, the whole jumps. And his face, I'm not certain... Oh, no, my headphones. Here's... Here's my takeaway from this video. I'm not certain he's having fun.

And I say that because his face is dead ass. He's dead ass serious. His face means business. He is flailing. He is, he is dancing. He's working hard. Straight ass face. He means business. First of all, as always, shout out to his mom at Elizabeth VZ. The hot dog song, I'm assuming that it was the hot dog song. I saw Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on the screen of his mom's phone. I'm assuming it was the hot dog song because the hot dog dance goes. So hard. Ellie and Wyatt really enjoy dancing. Benny enjoys dancing, but on her terms. So really, Benny of her. Finn is finally dancing to some music. We found out a little bit late that when she was shaking her head, what looked like she was telling us, no, she was actually dancing intermittently. You know what? Keeping us on our toes. All right, let's keep it scrolling here because I think this woman just figured out the perfect solution to one of pregnant women's biggest problems. Queen Emma.

The only way I will be going out in public for the rest of this pregnancy, she is putting post-it notes on her belly that say, no, it's not twins. Yes, I'm sure. 38 and a half weeks pregnant. No name yet. A girl. I know I'm about to pop. Yes, I am exhausted. This is outstanding because there is a rule of thumb that I think most people follow,

which is you do not address the pregnant woman being pregnant unless the pregnant woman acknowledges the pregnant woman is pregnant. That means if a bump is a bump, but you think to yourself, that could be period bloat. That could be a donut or 12 for breakfast. That could have been a burrito at lunch. It could be her organs. Guys, we're not addressing a belly until someone else addresses a belly. You know what I'm saying?

The other side of that is when someone is 38 and a half weeks pregnant and they're wearing things that are making it even more obvious that they are that pregnant. people love to have an opinion. They love to comment on it. They want to be able to be like, that's a big belly. You really are about to pop. When's your due date? Was it last week? Other post-it notes, I would add, no, I don't need help. Oh, no, I don't need help. No, I don't need help. Because 38 and a half weeks pregnant, I was moving furniture on my house, not because the furniture needed to be moved, but because I thought that's what would knock me into labor. So, no, I don't need your help.

Carrying my groceries. No, I don't need your help with the door. No, I don't need your help with my children. I'm good. I might, I would think to get a shirt with that on it. That would be a good one. No, you can't touch my belly. Or like, please don't touch me.

or maybe if you touch my belly, I'll touch yours. You know, just one of those. I feel strongly about that. Should we make a Nogalai shirt? Should we make an NGL shirt that says, if you touch my belly, I'll touch yours. It's our new maternity line. And last girl, this tiny human managed to cover her hair

and potentially her entire body in globs of Vaseline. And I'll let the clip take it from here. Oh my God. The caption on this says, Do I wash her in dawn like a duck? Yes. If you don't know the reference of this, you're too young. Yes, you wash her like she was in an oil spill.

You got to immediately put them in the tub. This is a tub containment situation. You certainly don't want them to touch anything else. And I will tell you, we have once gotten ourselves into this situation. And it wasn't Vaseline. It was worse. It was desetin. Anyone who doesn't know is butt paste, aka diaper rash cream. And if you have never used desetin, then I'm happy for you. If you have used desetin, you know that anything it touches, it lives on forever. And I mean that in like, even if you've wiped it away, it will smell like decetin, which isn't a pleasant smell.

Sorry, desetin. Who was it that was covered in butt paste? Who was it? Who was it? You know what? I count my lucky stars because it was butt paste and it wasn't shit. Literally. That's the whole sentence.

Hold on, let me see if I can find this. Was it Ellie? Her room smelled like it for weeks. I don't even remember if she did it to herself or if Wyatt helped her. I have so many pictures of shit in my phone. It's not even funny. It's actually alarming.

Actual shit? Mm-hmm. Tards. One time when. Wyatt was learning how to potty train. She took a shit on the kitchen floor. That was a day. I think it was Ellie. Oh my God. I have so many shits in my phone. And specifically that I've sent my husband. Talk about biting. That's why it's two teeths in Ellie's foot. Oh my God. That's insane. Can you tell I really send him the highlights?

Elliot Ray Kelsey. On the bed. on our eyes. I totally feel for this mom because we've been in this situation. It's a pain in the ass to get out. It's a pain in the ass to figure out where the heck else it is. That's the most difficult part because I swear there was butt paste somewhere in that room that I couldn't find. I don't know if it was up under the window cell.

It was somewhere that was making it smell like stale butt cream. That's it for DumeSroll the Week. Moving on, it's asked me some things. part two. Since we got so many questions from the real ones, we're going to do and ask me Some Things Part 2 brought to you by DoorDash. And this time, Queen Emma has opened it up to literally every topic. So let's see what crazy shit we're about to get into. Rapid Fire for real. Because, you know, less than an hour episode. Nope. Emma said, nope. First question, how would you feel if one of the girls decided to audition for the Dallas Cowboys Cheer Squad?

I'm going to ignore that question. Next up, we have an advice question here from Real 1, Julia. Number two, how much hinting for a proposal is too much hinting? You guys aren't going to like my opinion on this one. Any hinting is too much hinting. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. Here's the deal. Talking about it with them is one thing.

Talking about it with your significant other is one thing. If you're talking about it, it's a conversation. It's a two-way street. It means you're both engaged. You both know what you're talking about. You're both on the same page in that conversation. You might not be on the actual same page, but you're having a conversation with about it. So you're both aware of what's happening.

If you have to throw hints, if it's a hint situation, if you have to, no, no, he should want to. your significant others should want to take that next step. I think any, I think we shouldn't have to make hints. Now, if you're doing it jokingly or if you're doing it in a lighthearted way, or it's not truly with the intention of this will get them to ask, that can be funny. If you want to make hints, that's your decision, it's your relationship, if you have to make an ultimatum, do me a solid and get the fuck out.

Okay? There should not be ultimatum situation of if you don't ask me to marry you within X amount of time, we're done. No. Immediately no, I'm going to need you to take the first exit ramp off of that highway because no. You and your partner should want the same thing, aka to get married and spend your lives together. And if that's not the case, then maybe that's not your person. Number five, do the girls

enjoy the fame? First of all, yuck. Oh, God, that's terrible. The girls think that it's funny. They think it's funny that when we go out in public, people say, are you Jason Kelsey? And then we go back to the house and they say, are you Jason Kelsey? Sometimes we catch them playing a game amongst themselves where they are not involving adults, where they will start to go. Oh my gosh, I'm such a huge fan. Can we take a picture? Yuck. I don't like that our kids have picked up on this. Obviously, they're going to pick up on it when they leave the house with their dad. I, it makes me sad that this is true. This is, this took a very serious turn. It makes me sad that this is their reality. I want them to have as normal. I've been upbringing as possible. Um, but, uh, we just

make it a point to try and create a degree of separation as best we can. They think it's hilarious. They think that it's funny. Um, until someone, every so often, Wyatt will not like that someone is either talking about approaching us or staring at us. Um, she recently stared at, a group of young women who were speaking loudly across the street from us. And she stared at them with a really nasty look on her face and said, they are not taking a picture with my dad. And so I think most of the time they think it's funny and entertaining. And sometimes they do not. and I think that we should collectively leave them out of it. Okay?

Great. Let's do that. Do the girls have nicknames for each other? Cute or nice ones only. Ha ha. Oh, they don't have mean nicknames for each other. That would be horrible. I would nip that in the bud.

I did find a video of Wyatt recently where she refers to Ellie as Sissy, which was one of of the sweetest nicknames ever. What does? The girls call Finn Finney. I think everyone sort of calls her that. It has now morphed into Penny, so she gets called Penny pretty regularly. Ellie doesn't really get called anything. Benny gets called Boo Boo.

Not always by her sisters, but by people around us, family members, my dad. I grew up in a big nickname house. My nickname growing up was inky. My dad still calls me it. I call my dad fru for frugal. Don't ask. My sister's nickname was Laundry. Everybody, literally everybody had a nickname.

Except my mom. Go ahead, Lease. And we call all of our kids' nicknames. It's just not that their sisters have not adopted them. Like I call Finn Piny Pooh-Poo. Benny gets Benny Booodle or Benny Boo Boo Boo Boo Boo Boo Bear or Benny Boo. Benny Boo is the most frequent. Ellie used to be Ellie Bug.

So then she got called Buggy for a while. I call them all lovey. It's great because it's a sweet nickname. But then also, I can't mess up their names if I call them all lovey. And that's a wrap on Ask Me Some Things Brought to You by DoorDash. Coming up, we apparently have a fresh batch of Gen Alpha slang that all be very confused by right after these messages for me. Being a person is tough enough these days, let alone being a parent.

That's why I use DoorDash, because when life gets crazy, DoorDash helps bring some order to it. Like this past week, when we were trying to go in the pool because it was finally warm enough. And did we have swim vests? Last summer? Yes, we did. Did the dog find it and potentially chew the clips off of it? Also, yes. So in a pinch, I door dashed them.

I doordash those swim vest straight to my house. DoorDash came in clutch with that one. Real life needs real relief. That's why DoorDash is there for whatever you need, whenever you need it. Life with kids is wildly unpredictable. No matter how much parents try to plan, there's always going to be chaos. Being able to offload a few to-dos and give a little more time to focus on yourself and your family is huge. We all know life gets crazy. DoorDash just helps bring a little order to it. Order now. This message is brought to you by Apple Pay. Checking out online, Apple Pay makes it simple. Apple Pay is accepted on millions of websites and apps.

and counting. Just look for the Apple Pay button almost anywhere you do your online shopping. When you tap the Apple Pay button to check out, you don't have to worry about filling out any forms with your shipping address or a payment method. Instead, use your pre-saved information and check out in seconds. Need to make a change? You can easily review and change your card information and shipping details right in the payment sheet. Once you're ready, just double-click the side button, authenticate your purchase with Face ID, and you're done. Whether you're shopping online for every needs or treating yourself, skip the hassle. Shop with Apple Pay, terms apply.

This summer, the CVS Health app, helps me handle health care needs. It makes the whole health care experience simpler and more convenient, especially for busy parents and caregivers. The CVS Health app helps me get in and out of the pharmacy fast. You can pop in, pull up and scan your digital barcode at the pharmacy, and the pharmacist knows to grab your medications. I can also stock up on essential warm weather items like bug spray, sunscreen, and more. know, you can never have enough sunscreen when it comes to children. And when you have the range

that I have of ages, you need different ones. Like Wyatt prefers a spray, but obviously Finn needs a lotion. And the zinc-based ones, the baby ones. It's a whole thing. But you know who has me covered? CVS. And you can also save money and earn rewards with extra care. Unlock in-store and online savings with no coupon needed or get personalized deals by email or text. You can also quickly find find care from qualified providers. Go to cvs.com backslash app to learn more and download the app now. Hey, y'all. It's Kelly Clarkson with Wayfair.

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I'm back. And so are some of your teenagers who are home for summer break and saying all sorts of crazy shit you've never heard before in your life. good news is we're going to go through some of the newest gen alpha slang phrases right here. So maybe I can also understand anything my nieces say this summer because at least one of them is brain rot. And you know who you are. Is that one of the terms?

The brain route one of the terms? Shit. I was going to have that one. All right, Queen Emma has a list of the slang terms here. I'm going to go through and guess what each of them means before she gives me the real definition. So the first one, which is quite possibly the hardest one, I'm, yep, the hardest one by far. Okay, here we go. Number one, magging, M-O-G-G-I-N-G.

I don't even know where to, mogging. I've heard it one time. And the only reason I know that is because it hit my ears and I was like, that's not a thing. Mogging. Mogging is. Mugging is jogging your mind. It's mind jogging. It's the new brainstorming.

You tell me. It's mugging. It's mind jogging. It's brainstorming. Mogging is internet slang for outperforming, dominating, or looking much better than someone else? What? I don't like when these things happen. The phrase that is, uh, the example is bro, he totally outmogged me.

No, immediately no. That's a silly statement. I don't like it. Number two, body count. If this is not the body count that we used to reference, then this is about to be embarrassing. But body count for us, millennials, was how many people you hooked up with? Is that what this is? Nice.

Okay, it came back around. Okay. This refers to a number of sexual partners a person has had. Yeah, you guys are reusing our terms. you're welcome. Number three, chungis. This is something good. It sounds like it would be bad because it sounds like fungus, but it's chungis is good. It means something good. Yes? A term is the blend of the word chunk and humongous. It originated from a popular 2018 meme featuring a bloated overweight version of Bugs Bunny. Oh no. I was so confident. I was so confident. I was so confident.

Did you see that? I was so confident. I'm pretty sure that this is, I'm pretty sure that you're wrong. Number four, S-Y-B-A-U, shut your bitch-ass up. Do it. Show me it. Yeah. Here's the deal. I don't say shut up. I think it's really mean. So I would not use Saibow. And that is how it's pronounced. So you're welcome for that. Number five, T-S-P-M-O. Oh no. This shit. shit's pissing me off. Am I right? Hell yeah. This shit piss me off. I don't know how to say that, though. Tis, Tis, no. They pronounce it. I'm telling you, I was told S-Y-B-A-U was Saibow. They actually say Saibout instead of shut your bitch ass up. Shut your bitch ass up. It means business. You know what I mean? Yeah. Okay. Just thought you should know. Number six, call your Uber.

I think that means you gots to go. Does it? Yeah, it does. Is a dismissive phrase used to tell someone to leave, shut up, or go away? Easy. That one was easy. See, that one references a real life situation that makes sense. There is context to that connection.

Mogging? No. Unless someone can connect the dots for me. No. No, number seven, smacks. That shit smacks. That's delicious. That's good. We like it. Smacks. Tell me, commonly used as a verb to describe food that is exceptionally delicious. I am crushing it right now. Where it tastes so good, it makes you want to smack your lips. Yeah. Similarly used to slaps, which describes anything of high quality that is highly enjoyable. Okay, scuba. Oh, no. Is scuba? Is scuba?

Scuba this thing. Motherfucker. What does it mean? What does it mean? I don't know that it has a meaning, but it's this thing. You hold your nose and you do this. And that's what scuba is. Am I right?

A dance the kids are doing after they say a white lie. Hard to explain. Someone help. Let me tell you something. I would like to give a shout out to Charlie, my niece, because I could not have gotten through this with any answers without her. And that's on it being summertime and me spending, getting to spend more time with my nieces and them keeping me up to date because remember earlier when I said brain rot,

Charlie's a little brain rot. And my young ins, they know what that means. That's not an insult. That's just a description. So there's that. All right, I think that's as much Gen Alpha slang as I can take for one day. I got six of eight. Are you kidding me?

I hope this is helpful for everyone with teens at home this summer. Real ones, let me know what I missed in the comments. Last thing before we close this out. Real one, comment of the week. Ugh. I'm mad. I'm mad. I read a little.

Nope, don't turn your mic on. Turn your mic off. I'm mad. Turn your mic off, Emma. God. And this week we have a comment from at Turtle Girl 93. Wonder who that could be. Queen Emma?

They said, Hey girl, big fan of your podcast, especially the longer 60 plus minute episodes. I don't know you personally at all, but I just wanted to randomly share that Love Island UK and Love Island USA both premiered this week and the real ones would fancy a Kylie Kelsey review next week. It's still early days. So I need your breakdown of the islanders. Is that what they're called?

Maybe watch it with Queen Elna. Yep, let me do that. Let's be honest. She can't have much going on. Okay, bye, thanks. Thanks for that, Queen Emma. I mean, what's the-year-93 gets it, right? Yeah, what's the verdict? The verdict is no. Why? Because I don't want to watch Love Island. This could be our thing. I'm still trying to figure out, I'm still trying to figure out what the heck went on on Summerhouse because I got the reviews, the reunion on TikTok. Fuck that. You got Love Island.

Also, again, I did not watch Summer House, but what I will say about Summerhouse, is an ex-boyfriend of a friend is off limits, the end, period. So let me just say that as if I know anything that went on. I don't know any details. So if I'm wrong, just breeze past that shit. Real ones, here's the deal. Queen Emma has been talking about this for literally months. So I'm going to need you to either have my back or have hers.

Choose aside. you either want me to watch Love Island and talk about it on this freaking podcast. I'll do it one time. I'm not doing it multiple times. Maybe twice. Maybe twice. Twice. Twice.

I will talk about it twice. I'll give you twice because then we have context. Okay. I will give you two times to talk about Love Island. But if you don't want me to talk about Love Island because you love me and you care about me and you want me to spend my time doing other things that I actually enjoy, then you should comment that you don't care about. Love Island. Should we do a poll and make it? Let's...

Polls that are usually working by favor, so... Then no, I don't want to do a poll. Cool. So we'll put it to a poll. Thanks, everybody. Trash. And for our two of Love Island reviews. I don't have free time to do that. And that's it for our summer solo spectacular episode of Not Gonna Lie. You can find even more clips on my YouTube channel on Worship Monday. We'll be back next week with a brand new episode. If you

haven't seen my Fafo episode with Michelle Wee West or our last NGL episode with astronaut Christina Cook, check them out right now on our YouTube channel. Follow us on social media at NGL with Kylie for clips throughout the week. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcast. Knock in the lie is a Wave Original brought to you by pull-ups. Thanks again to the real ones for tuning in.