Not Skinny But Not Fat - Back to The Hills w/ Audrina Patridge

Episode Date: August 2, 2022

You know her from The Hills, the young bombshell Heidi and Lauren “spontaneously” meet by the pool- Audrina Patridge! Now a mom, the former reality tv star wrote a tell-all book, Choices, where she shares everything from what was real on The Hills to her relationship with Justin Bobby, Chris Pine, and other famous men, and finally her ex husband with whom she had a very tumultuous relationship. We discuss all this and more on today's episode! Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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This is Amanda Hirsch from the Not Skinny but Not Fat Podcast. You might know me from Not Skandi Bonatha on Instagram where I spend my time talking about reality TV, celebrities, everything happening, and pop culture. I also talk to some of our favorite celebs and reality TV stars. We talk about what's going on. Tune in every Tuesday and just feel like you're talking to shit with your best friends in your living room.

Adriena Patrick. Amanda. I can't believe you're here. I know. I'm so happy to be here and finally meet you. And today's the day the book comes out. Yes. Choices.

Today is the day. I read the book and I told you before we started two days. Yeah, it's an easy read. And I feel like everyone that's read it, they say they can't put it down. So. Because if you've lived in our era, which. was when the hills came out. I was like your age.

It was like watching people my age on screen, living the life. And your book gives behind the scenes like the way I would want. Like if you didn't write it the way you would, I would have so many questions. But you just clarified, you're like in this scene, this happened and like explained the difference

between fake and kind of produced. Yeah, like where the blurred lines are. I really wanted just to be vulnerable. and if I was going to do this book, I had to give 100%. I couldn't do it halfway. Do you know what I'm thinking now about your book and chatting with you kind of before we started is like even in your book about Corey, which we'll get to that, but also about the show, it just showed your kindness again.

Like you weren't like, guys, you know, Spencer vibes like, this scene, you know, you were like, you were even kind about the show. Yes. I just, I wanted to do this in a very respectful way. And it, it's not like I wanted to expose anyone or shame anyone or call anyone names or anything. That's not what it's about. It's about me and my perspective and what I went through. And I feel like it's done in a very respectful manner. Very, very. Like I said, about the producers, Adam DeVille, which we now know did Selling Sunset. Yes. Yeah. So he did The Hills as well. And the way you told the story about how you got on the show. show was so interesting. Yeah. And I feel like even with selling sunset, like he used the same formula that he used on the hills because when I watched it, I was like, oh, like he shot it just like the hills. You could probably tell, right? Totally. And then you noticed the voiceovers and all that. It was, it's so funny to watch reality TV now because from being on it and knowing what goes on

behind the scenes, it's like I can't watch it like a normal person. Right. And you were saying, which like those parts made me giggle. Like when you. address the long stairs at dinner. Oh yeah. The blank stairs. Adrina, but like they took it, like, why did they make it so? They could have done like, did they want us to feel awkward? Like, what did they want us to feel in those moments? There was a lot of, so we actually had Andrew Perry on, who was a producer during the first two seasons. On your podcast. On our podcast with Brody and Frankie. And he explained all of that, which I asked him. I was like, I have a question for you. Tell me about the blank stairs. Why was the hills like known? Like you guys did that in so many scenes and we had so much

to say. And he said it's to keep people wondering it like amps it up. It keeps them like, you know. I mean, it worked, I guess. I mean, it worked in a way, but I think most people who are at least like savvy reality TV watchers were like, like what's happening? I know. It killed me to watch. And it looked like a boring date. I know. And I had so much to say. And I was like, You cut all of that out and just showed me staring. Why? So it was frustrating. But now looking back and rewatching all of it, it's like funny to watch and entertaining.

I just took everything. So you are watching all of it with Brody and Frankie? Yeah. So we watch it before we go in and film our episodes. We usually do three or four in a row. So we're just finishing up first season going into second season. And watching it now with a whole different perspective, it's a little cringy, but it's so, like, it's so, I don't know, you noticed things that you never would have noticed back then.

Like what? Like, in some of the episodes, you're like, why? Lauren, you know, she was always the one that had her head on her shoulders and gave good advice and the one that was like the good friend. But watching it, Brody and I were like, wow, she was really pissed off in a lot of these scenes. Like, she was really angry. Right. She didn't have like the bubbly vibe. Right.

she wasn't a little pissed off. I could tell in your book and tell me if I'm wrong, like you have a little resentment with Lauren. You know, we had a lot that went on that nobody knows about. And even with our agent and our publicist that we shared, and when I lived in the backhouse, like she had a camera pointing out my backhouse.

So anytime I left her came home, her agent had access to that. So he was always... Wait, why did her agent have access to her? I don't. They knew when I left. when I came home, who I was with, what I was doing. And that I just felt such a invasion of privacy that I didn't even want to really go there. It's just, there was so many little things

that kept happening and no communication about little rude comments being made that you just sweep under the rug and then you pretend it doesn't happen. And then you have to do a scene together and pretend everything's great. And it's just like it kept building and building. Is she not like who the public thinks she is? Lauren's a sweet girl. I mean, she's so nice. She is fun. You know, I think, how do I say this? She just, if you're in Lauren's world, you have to be in her world and kind of follow her rules. Yeah. Yeah, you said that in the book. And you definitely painted Heidi as what Heidi was to a lot of us at the beginning of the hills, which was like, bouncy, bubbly, fun, friendly, let's go out, blah, blah, blah. I mean, even today she's like that. She's still like that. And we had the best time filming. And, she just she's like one of the best reality TV stars like she steps in and she amps it up and she gives the cameras what they need. So do Spencer and Heidi support your podcast like because they were trying to do or Spencer was trying to do like a TikTok vibe right? I've heard

about this that I think he was talking smack on me. I don't know. I didn't even watch it but some of the other podcasts I've done people have brought it up to me. Oh I didn't know he was talking shit. I didn't either. And until people brought it up. And they didn't tell me exactly. But I don't know. Spencer says a lot of things. So I don't really care, take it to her.

Maybe Shrine is trying to get season three of the new beginning. I mean, it would be great if they came on our podcast. But I don't know if that's going to happen. Well, I had Kristen Cavalery on who said that you guys were friends. Yes. And she said that Lauren wouldn't do their podcast. Yeah. I mean, I think Lauren and Kristen don't have the best relationship.

Yeah. for friendship. But it's been like a hundred years. I know. Lauren and I were past all of our whatever. We're grown up. We're in different places now. We have kids.

Like the past is the past. We're so different now. So it'd be great if Lauren came on ours. But I think her, Kristen and Stephen with that love triangle, whatever they went through back in high school is still there. Or like, there's the drama or the fighting. I don't know everything that happened with them. Yeah.

When you came on the hills, you came like completely. knew, like the girl that like knows LA, like, but you had recently moved there? So I was already living there and I worked at Kyoto Studios. That was my real job. Yeah. As a receptionist. And I was already going out in L.A. I had friends up there that were models and actors and musicians. So I was up there since I was 17, you know, going out and doing things, shows and all that. So when I met Adam at the pool, he liked that I was kind of already established in L.A. and I had my go-toes on Thursdays and Mondays and like in LA if you live there, you don't go out on the weekends. You only go out Monday through Thursday. Got you. Yeah. Did you have a chemistry test with the girls? Like it was

just like go vibe? Like what if you wouldn't vibe? Well, so basically Adam talked to me. He liked my vibe and Whitney. So we were their first LA friends. But we had to go to MTV Studios, do a long interview. And they asked us a million questions. And then within two to three weeks, we were filming and but we filmed for a long time before they even aired it it was almost a year to see our dynamic and how we got along oh right it's a whole i keep forgetting that you guys filmed year round yes it was non-stop but for the first before they even aired it the first season we filmed so much to see like who clicks who doesn't click what stories we could get what makes sense yeah and now that you're doing the podcast with brodie and in the book i feel like you kind of made it

sound like there might be like that there's not that it's not friendly just friends like there's no ounce of flirtation like there is an ounce of flirtation i feel like with brodie and i are both flirty people and we do have chemistry that's undeniable like friend or whatever like we've never taken it to that romantic level we respect each other and our friendship so i'm there for him he's there for me he has a girlfriend you know and it's like it's totally really, it's like brother and sister at this point. It's the teasing. It's calling each other out. It's, we've been there. He's been there for me through all the hard times through my divorce and my ex and all of that. So would you say he's the castmate or former castmate that you

most close? Yeah? Yeah. Okay. I would say Brody and Heidi. But it's not like besties talk every day. Not every day. No. No, no, no. Because I'm thinking just of like. My besties are like my friend Bessie Joey and Brianna and I have my like core like five girls

that those and my sisters those are who I go to and talk to every day they know me like no one else knows me That's the thing you were saying your sisters

which I feel like in the book is another thing that we don't know about Aldrina as much especially if you haven't seen Audrina the show is like how much

family is like important to you and are such a huge part of your life. Yeah, my family and my friends are everything. And, you know, we grew up. My family were so close. We might. We live hard. We fight hard. We, you know, we love hard. We're like this family. No one's perfect, but we always have each other's back. So during the Audrina show, bringing my family onto a reality show is really hard because they didn't really get the drama side of it. And it like a lot of the things we filmed sometimes that were manipulated and

needed to be amped up and instigated. That was my family. If it was other people, I wouldn't really care. But it did break our family up for a little bit. But you guys got over that. Oh, yeah. We got over it. I mean, that's so wild.

Do you regret it or is it like hashtag no regrets? I don't regret it. I just wish if I could do it over again, like I would give them more direction. And since I did have a title of executive producer, which I didn't really help with anything, but I had that title, I wish that I would have. pushed more to like be a part of producing and protect them. Yeah. I'd want to see the editing or see what they had in mind instead of just like showing up and filming and following the lead. So Brody also said to the to the press like a couple of months ago that he was happy

New Beginnings isn't coming back. Do you feel the same way? Do you feel differently? I mean it's a little bittersweet because we've done the show for so long. But I think it kind of ran its course and we were all a little burnt out. And there's only so many storylines of who's going to, who are we going to date now? Like, what are we going to do now? You run out of ideas to keep it interesting. Right. So you feel good about it. Would you do more reality TV, though? I don't think so. Nothing with drama. I'm like finally at peace in my life. And I did that, the drama and the reality side of things for so long that I finally just want peace. If it was like a show that's inspiring or helpful or, I don't know, interior design

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How awkward is this? But like I was obsessed with him. I feel like everyone was. Like, he's just the epitome. of like hot dude doesn't care like smoke do you smoke cigarettes sometimes she was like so cute no I was that was like my I used to go to union square in New York if you know it to like watch skate like people that look like him like skate like I'm not like that's my type and like never did I ever date anybody that type but it looks like you dated your type and like looks right yes I went for

the bad boys I I was a rebel in that sense. And I had to learn the hard way with everything. Yeah. So with Justin, though, I met him before the show. And I brought him on. And then once he was on, he was on the show for good. It's like, once you bring someone on and you create a story with them, they don't just go away. What's so wild we found out in the book that he like did your hair. Yeah. Literally. Yeah. I met him at the studio I worked at. He gave me his number. Said he wanted to do my hair. I was like, okay, this guy's hot. And he wants to give me, like, do my hair for free, sure.

So he did my hair. Then he ended up being from Orange County. And we started going out down there, then in L.A., and, like, that's how we started hanging out. I mean, Justin Bobby, you also tell the story, which you brought me back that, like, Lo and Lauren came up with the name because they were, like, making fun of him. And I remember that scene. I was like, oh, my God.

Justin hated it. Do you call him that? Like, if you were talking about him behind his back. No. Never. Okay. Never. You never.

No, so he's Justin, but his middle name was Robert. So he's like, if I go on the show, like, and some of his family calls him Bobby. So he's like, maybe I'll just go by Bobby. Don't call me Justin, just call me Bobby. So when I told Lauren that, then Lauren told Lowe, so they had this little giggle fest of Justin Bobby, which he embraces and loves now. Oh, he does. Wait, question though.

Are Lowe and Lauren friends? I have no idea. Are you friendly with Lowe? No. Okay. I just wonder people here like how this is this bitch care about every detail. No, I just wonder like it just seems from an outside perspective that like Lauren wanted to distance herself from that life. Like I did reality TV but like I'm not like part of it.

Don't peg me as like a reality TV person. I think she used reality TV to start her brand and then once the brand started going, that's she's done. I see. She just was out, which is smart. And then as far as low, we were never like friends. We were friends because of Lauren. So when the show ended, I never stayed in contact with Lowe. I see.

Okay, back to Justin Bobby, the most employment. No, I'm just kidding. Wait, so this is the thing about Justin Bobby. And now I feel disrespectful to him. Justin, don't worry. I like respect you. So his vibe that we're talking like, cool, doesn't give a shit. Doesn't align with like, I want to be a reality TV star.

I would never think he wanted to. But Justin, and I would. would always say this. I was like, he almost, whatever he was reading or whatever he was into, he, like, became this character. So whether it was Joaquin Phoenix or, like, Johnny Depp, or there was these, like, mystery, like, you know, that he took on and kind of brought it into his, like, hills. But where did that come from? Because, like, you wanted to be an actress, model host. So, like, you had that in you. He came on for me. Like, he came on first season.

He filmed at one scene doing my hair at my apartment. And it was really awkward. They're like, no, he's not one for the cameras. That was so boring. He doesn't say anything or give you anything to work with. And then after that, we were dating longer and then it gets to third season. And he kind of saw how it was going and how it was, you know, from me, like what it was really like. So then he was comfortable and he said, okay, I'll film with you.

Let's do it. But then he comes on and he's like, birth. burping and then he watched that episode so he didn't like how he was looking what he was doing on the show. But he kept on coming back. Yeah. Yeah. He's like an enigma. Right? Like he's like a person that like looks one type but isn't exactly. And the other thing you were saying in the book is that so we got the long stairs and you know other things. But we also got kind of the way it was portrayed was that like you're obsessed with him and he's like into you at

like points and leading you on and we never really got to see his good side with you but you send the book there were yeah and like even I think I gave an example when we filmed a pool scene and they wanted me to take my top off

so I did and to get him in the pool which I got him in the pool and then after you took your top off so he got him in the pool so then like after after that, you know, we film like he just leaves me and takes off and I'm like there hanging out. He didn't just leave me. Like, we stayed after the cameras were gone. He stayed the night. We hung out. We were together all the next day. So there's so much more that people don't know.

Yeah. And I talk about that in the book. Right. But okay. So in those moments of Justin, you know, he had his his shitty moments. Yeah. Would you depict that relationship as like a toxic? One. I honestly, Justin and I were so young. I was, what, 19 to 25 when I was dating him. And 19, like, I don't, like, I'm just young having fun. He was hot. Like, yeah, I liked him. Yeah. And I wasn't looking for someone to get married to or, like, the good guy or, like, someone on my list of every, I didn't even have a list of what I wanted. I just liked him. And. But when he came back for the, for the new beginnings, the first season. in. He wasn't that great either. Well, yeah, we went on that date. And there's Stephanie's stuff. Oh, gosh. Yeah. All that happened, which was so weird. And then he brought the big boob girl.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He brought her on, which I think was set up because my manager, Repter. Mm. And they were looking for someone to set him up with. And I was like, oh, I didn't know that happened. Or like that he was, that that's his vibe. Or is it?

not his vibe at all. Like his vibe normally is like these tall like brunette supermodel girls. Yeah. And so. Excuse me, Adriena. You know, sorry. So whenever she came on and I was like, this is not real. There's no way this could be real. But then they actually ended up dating for a long time. No way. Yeah. Like because because they were brought. So like on the show, shit can happen like that. Like brought together for the show. And then you just kind of have that chemistry, you connect, you film together, and it becomes more than you ever expected. Okay. So even though you're saying we were young, blah, blah, blah, you say in the book a few times that like you never felt this kind of chemistry. Yeah. It's weird. With Justin, we literally

locked eyes and it was like we knew each other for so, it's like we've been in past lives together. It was crazy chemistry and we both felt it. And then when we're together, our friends would feel it. It was just like one of those. The best sex of your life. Undeniable. Gosh, I'm trying to remove it. I know. It's hard to remember. It was so long ago. No, I know. When I try to remember, like, I'm like.

I mean, it was definitely passionate. I think, yeah, there is moments of, I think we'll always have love for each other. But, you know, we've just kind of, we're different people now. Has he met your daughter? Yes. Really? Yeah. Aw.

He's been like, I am, Justin. He met Kira when she was like, like it was a while ago and he's like she's your mini me like she's so cute you made you make pretty babies and yeah yeah he met her it was cute it was cute yeah so is the door closed on that in the book you also make it sound like maybe well you know i think the door is closed yeah on that one i just we've had so much history yeah and ups and downs and like my friends and family just every everybody's so involved in our past and history that I feel like even if we did want to, it would just be so weird.

I don't know. At this point. Yeah. Or beautiful. I mean, look at Benefer 2.0. You're like the third person who has told me that. Oh, really?

Oh, wait. They told me that about Brody and not to Justin. Oh, okay. I guess no original thoughts over here. And also, you brought me back when you were like about him and Lauren hooking up because I completely forgot that there was that. Yeah, that wasn't like a fake storyline.

That was a phone call that I really got from my friend Dino, who was good friends with Justin. They were in Vegas together for Lauren was there for magic. They ran into each other and they all hung out. My friend Dino, who was so close for three weeks, wouldn't look me in the eye, wouldn't talk to me. I was like, why are you being so weird? And finally, he fessed up and told me. So when I confronted Lauren and Justin, they both wouldn't respond back and wouldn't talk to me until the cameras were there. And that, like, made me feel so betrayed on so many levels from both of them.

Yeah, and so many levels, like, literally. Because, like, now only did you do this, but you actually want to use it for the show. Like, I'm a crazy delusional person and blah, blah, blah, blah. But I was like, why would he say this? And I'm asking you, did it happen? Because how it just lines up. But no. But they denied it.

They deny it. But you know that it's true. I mean, I believe, Dino, and the body language and this house. they reacted. It was kind of an answer. Even though it's a coupling, I don't know what's like, I feel like it doesn't make sense. It doesn't make sense. I think maybe it was just like a random one-night thing and it was like, oh gosh, we're wasted. I don't know. I don't really care anymore. At the time, it like was the end of the world to remain. And clearly everyone watches it on the show. And that was real emotions. Like. But do you think that essentially, because I know you said a lot of things off

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That same kind of vibes, though. No? I mean, no, Corey isn't exactly Justin Vives, but he's kind of, I mean, he's a professional biker. Yeah. And has kind of bad boy

vibes. I mean, you go for hot guys, TBH. Like, he is good looking. But that relationship was, was, that it was great in the beginning. And then it just in my book, I explained how it just slowly started, you know, crumbling. And there was so many insecure and trust issues. And it was just so bad on so many levels. But then there are those really amazing moments that you want to hold on to and not let go and you want to have hope and fight for that to keep it that way. And then something will happen three or four months down the road where the girls, right means like he cheated but it's like we're so good now but now i find this out and this happened three months ago so it was constantly like that really bad cycle looking back at it now how hard

is it to not be hard on yourself like of the moments that you did stay and the moments that you forgave him for if it was cheating or not answering or being mean to you i mean there was a lot of heartache I think, you know, and I did give so many chances where I feel like I should not have, but I did get the greatest blessing from him, which is our daughter, Kira, and I love her so much. So I would do it all over again, but, you know, I wouldn't recommend to anyone if they're in a relationship like that to keep going back over and over because it does start to kill you inside and it sucks your soul out and you're not the same person. It takes a long time to recover and a lot of healing from it. When I was reading in the book, though, Adriena, I wonder if it's because

you wrote it. What year did you write the book? Gosh, this is like a couple years ago. You started writing the book a couple years ago? Yeah. Two or three years, maybe. When I was reading your description of your relationship with him, even the good stuff, it was hard as a reader to like, believe that you loved him because I guess it's so hard for you to write about but you didn't describe when you were like oh there were good parts but was it hard to remember the good parts and really make us see that love because we didn't get a lot of those moments you know in the beginning there were some of those moments but no there weren't a ton of those moments but those when they were like I held on to those because and it's so bad it's like sometimes

you forget all the bad and you just want to remember the good. Yeah. And that's when you need your friends to remind you of the bad and not go back because you need that strength to stay strong and not to let someone disrespect you or to treat you like that. Because once you let someone disrespect you, they keep doing it over and over and over. Right. And I think that's what happened.

They think they could get away with it. Do you think you were like really in love with him, like that he was the love of your life? I think at that point in time, I didn't really know what. love was. And with Justin, coming from Justin and then going into a relationship with Corey, you know, Corey showed me a different side that was very like, Justin was romantic too in his own way. I don't know. It's so hard to describe the two of them. But I felt safe with Corey. Like, I felt like he was a masculine guy that would protect me and that's what I needed at that time. And the compliments he would give me, I just felt like loved. And I just felt like loved.

I felt safe with him at that moment. And then it just, you know, started to change. The moment that you found out you were pregnant, do you remember, like, there's so many things going through my mind? Like, what was the overpowering emotion? Like, happy or fuck? I mean, I was ready for a bit. I think I was 30. So I was like, I've done so much in my life. I'm so content with where I've been, what I've done, where I've traveled, that I'm ready to have. I got to that point where I was ready to have a baby. But when I found out, the timing wasn't ideal, you know, and a lot of things are running through my mind where I was just like, oh my God, like we're not in the best place right now. We were fighting. We were broken up. You know,

all these things were happening. And I just had to accept it and say, you know, I'm going to have this baby no matter what, whether he's with me or not. So in the back of my mind, I subconsciously, like prepared myself for the worst and was doing it no matter what. That's what was so wild to read that it was like subconsciously preparing yourself for the worst saying if I need to do this alone, I got it. I'm going to get a house, blah, blah, blah, which is like so like amazing. And I respect you so much for that. At the same time, you were planning a wedding.

I know. So what was I thinking? I don't know. Like your mind was like into, on one hand, you were like, if this doesn't work out, I have a backup plan. I could do this on my own. But you also were so committed to make you committed. I was almost forcing it to happen because I wanted that family dynamic so bad.

And because I was pregnant and my whole family, you don't get divorced. Like you stick it out. You make it work. So it's like, okay, we're in this. We're having a baby. We're going to make this work no matter what. And I was committed. And I was like, nothing was going to stop me.

Hearing about you pregnant. doing those flights to Australia to Hawaii to plan the wedding to New York to find your Miami to find

your breath I was like this bitch like pregnant with all the stress you were all over the place I was and I did

I don't think I wrote about this in the book but I did have a scare when I was like six months pregnant you did write about it yeah

so that's when it was like okay Audrina you need to calm down you're pushing yourself over the edge like this isn't good for the baby because I just go, go, go, go, go. And I run from my feelings and that's what I was doing. I didn't want to think about the worst or what could happen.

I just wanted to stay busy and just keep going and not sit still. What do you think now looking back, like what was really pulling you to stay in this relationship that you describe was not good? I think it was wanting to be loved and wanting that, dynamic. And it's like I was in it for so long. Why give something up to start over all over again with someone new? And just why not try to make it work with this person that knows me and I know him? But it wasn't healthy. You can't force that. And you have to like be able to walk away, which is hard. I mean, the moments that you describe in the book and we talked about this before

you started that I was asking you how hard it was to write it and, you know, knowing that Corey might read it, but I told you that I think you really wrote from your experience. You weren't bashing him. It was more about your journey with. Yeah, I'm not bashing him. I'm not calling him names. I'm not, I mean, I think at one point I'd talk him up in what he was in his career and all that. But this is more about my perspective and what we went through. And everything in there about him is already out there in the public. It's not a secret that we were in a toxic relationship. Just Google it, like everything's in the police report or in the documents that TMZ got before we even walked out of the courthouse. You know, it's plastered everywhere. So it's just kind

of condensing it in one place. And I definitely, like, took it down a lot and just explained where I was mentally and emotionally and what I was going through. It was wild. Reading it, like, this is part of the reason I couldn't put it down is, like, imagining you with your baby in that moment in the bathroom. Yeah. You know, you just want to get you out of there. And you even say, like, when your dad told you to call the police, you were like, you had to think about the fucking paparazzi in that moment. I know.

Because I knew. You want to protect. Any, if I called the police, if I did anything, it's going to be all over. And then it's like, is that the right thing to do? How do I keep this private? But there's, I couldn't keep it private anymore. It was just, it got. to that point.

You don't really describe the second incident, though, the one that you did end up calling the police. Oh. Right? The first time in the bathroom, you didn't call the police. No. And the second time, I don't remember. I mean, you could Google the police reports, Google it, and you could read it there.

There is so much. And there was some stuff I just could not put in the book that I didn't want to talk about or put in there. So I put as much as I could to explain. everything that's already kind of out there with him and I respectfully. I've been telling you guys about Ph.D. Feminine health about how you should take care of your vagina, about how, you know, maybe it's time now that you're, you know, 27 or 37 or 47 for you to stop washing your Vigai with, you know, regular soap. But if you do want to wash your vagina,

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with him. Yeah. So we were off and on for like, I don't know, like eight to 10 years, but we were never consistently together until I got pregnant. And that was for one year straight. But he also was gone for six months of it traveling in Australia. So the longest amount of time we were ever really together was probably like six to eight months together. But I do feel, Adriena, when you said about your baby and I have a child, I know this, like, no matter what happened, you could never regret this relationship. No. And Kira is such a blessing.

She is the best thing ever. Right, because you have Kira. Yeah. I mean, that's one good thing that came from it, you know, and I'm thankful for that. Right. Are there any regrets about ending the relationship sooner? Like, after you had Kira? I wish, one thing, I just wish that I didn't rush into marriage.

Like, we should have figured it out. I don't, you know, it's like, I didn't need to rush into marriage. We could have just been engaged for a while, figured out our parenting skills, our religious. Like, there's so many things you need to talk about before getting married and having a baby with someone. Because that all, like, it's like a waterfall that just like caves in. And you're just like, oh, my God, there's so much that we don't agree on. And I didn't even know about you, but we've been together for so long. I didn't know this side or this, you know that you figure out and so yeah my advice to girls like you don't need to rush into getting

married like really get to know someone before you rush into being with someone so you were saying the reason why you wanted to get married was a lot because like that's what you know and like that standard you know family dynamic was important to you yeah the traditional traditional you get married then have a baby well i had a baby so we have to get married like now yeah you know did your view change on that like on families and yeah i feel like my views have changed a lot you know no one's perfect and you don't need to stick to your family traditional ways if you get pregnant like like i did you don't have to rush into a marriage like you really want to take your time with that one because divorce is hell and i mean we were only married for nine months and it took over a year for that to even

finalize so it's a long hard expensive process that's just not worth it. So make sure you know who you want to marry before you get married. That's really the one. And you give other advice in your book to girls that find themselves in toxic relationships. Yeah, just the red flags and what to look out for and to surround yourself with the have a support system. You need the strength.

And it's easy to be blinded and get sucked into that and feel like no one's going to love you ever again. And you start believing all these lies and things that are. said to you, and you lose yourself. So that's when you need your friends to pull you out. Yeah. Did you feel like your friends were scared to tell you? Some of them were scared.

After we broke up and it was like done, everyone was like, oh my God, I wanted to tell you so bad at the wedding and what was really going on, but I don't want to break your heart because you were getting married. There was just so many people that in my life that all came out and told me these things after the fact. And I was like, oh, my gosh. Like, but they also told me during.

I just didn't want to listen. I didn't want to listen. I was determined. I was committed. I was making it work no matter what. Do you feel like this could happen to anybody? Like, even if you think you're a strong girl and you're like, no, I would have seen the signs.

Like, I would have got, like, do you feel like it's something about men like this that can just blind do? And this can happen to anyone, even the most successful women, you fall in love. You get sucked in. We're emotional. We want to care for men. We want love. We're nurturing.

Yeah. So it's easy to get lost in that spider web and just like spun, you know. Yeah. I mean, you guys, if you read the book and you should, all those moments that I'm thinking about now, just how much you gave to this relationship, then how much you gave to like just appease him so you could work and be with your child and you were juggling so much to make this work? I mean, I gave 200%.

I gave everything I had to make sure. sure if I'm going to walk away, like I'm going to walk away knowing that I gave it all. But again, the icing on the cake was what happened when things got a little physical and just the sometimes even physical, like the mental and emotional abuse is worse. Like that really like hit me hard. Yeah. You describe a moment in the book when you're, you know, sleeping and you wake up to screaming. And that just like literally broke my heart that nobody deserves that.

but you didn't even do anything to remotely deserve it. I just, I know. It was, I think at that time, like, and I'm not going to give excuses for him, but he was in a really bad place and numbing himself in a way to cope with his feelings. But we did not go about that. I mean, we went to therapy and I talk about that.

It just, everything just kept spiraling. But it wasn't a good experience for you, the therapy you said. No, it was terrible. Yeah, sometimes therapists don't. I've heard about this, you guys, like therapists aren't got like sometimes they don't have the right answers and they could you know I know a couple that therapists you know sided with the guy even though the girl like you know had a lot

of issues and she made her think that she was so and you say that in the book like the therapist didn't help no she didn't help at all but I think she would give us examples of what she went through with her ex so it's almost like she was projecting what she went through onto us because I shut down and I run. That's, when they say fight or flight, I flight. I'm out of there. Get me out of there. And so when he would come at me and like,

accuse me of things or just keep name calling and, you know, I would just shut down and go to the other room. We're like, I don't want to do this right now. You're angry, like, calm down, especially if it was in front of our daughter. Like, there was just no self-control. So I would go in the other room. I need to keep following me and I have to go to the next room.

And so finally I just had to leave. I just had to get out of there. So the therapist said that's like, that's another form of abuse is like not communicating, but it's like how long do I have to stand there and take it when they're not trying to communicate back? Well, fuck that therapist. This part of the book is the fun part of the book,

which is kind of spruced all over it. And I would call these like boops because like boop, Leo de Caprio wanted to date me. No big deal. Like all these odd celebs that Audrina Patridge has had, around her over the years. So let's go through them.

I mean, the fact that Kevin Connelly is first on my list, like is giving him a lot of credit right now. Wait, he's first on your list. Well, no, just because he was first in the book. Oh, yeah. You were describing the days that Hyde was it? Yeah. I need to go to Hyde.

An entourage was like the hottest show and the Hillswood was at its peak then. So we were always surrounded by them going out. So they actually went out together, like Adrian and Kevin, Like the actors in the show. Well, I would see Adrian out sometimes. I would see Kevin out a lot. But we all ran in the same circle of friends. So Kevin would flirt with you, a galore?

I mean, I think Kevin's just a flirt in general. He's a nice guy. He's funny. But you never did, went out with him running. No. And then there was Lunar de Caprio. You met him on a yacht? No.

We were. I'm making it up because he's on a yacht now, I think. He's somewhere in a yacht, maybe with Gigi, we don't know. I don't know. So we were, there is this prince. somewhere in the Middle East. And it was his birthday in Vegas. So he flew a group of celebrities out on a private jet, which was amazing. And I talk about this in the book. And after we all went to this, like, private club where he had, I don't know, he rented out or something. It was like very

extravagant, everything. And it was fun. So I was sitting at the table. I brought my brother as my date. It was me and my brother. That's a dumb move, Adrina. It's my brother's like my little protector. But what if they would think you were with it? You should have worn a shirt like I'm not with him. My brother looks young. You could tell he's my brother. Okay. Yeah, at the time, we look like he's my brother. Okay.

There's no, yeah, no confusion. But I was at the table with Megan, Fox, and Brian Austin Green and, like, a few other people. And a bodyguard kept coming over. And he's like, excuse me, Leo would like you to come over for a drink. And I looked over and I was like, he's surrounded by supermodels. He wants me to go over there. Like, let me have a drink and I'll go over there after. Like, let me just like get some courage, you know, something.

Liquid courage. Yeah, so I had a drink, and then he came back over, and I was like, no, not yet. And then the next thing you know, Leo's coming up to me sitting, like squeezes in between me and my brother and sits there and talks to me. So that was so funny. But I feel like, again, I see him everywhere. He's everywhere. Oh, really? Yeah.

So, still today? Yeah. When you go out, I mean, okay. Another one is Ryan Cabrera, which was also, I feel like Adriena and I have the same type. I loved Ryan Cabrera. What was that song that was really popular? No, like the mode. On the way down?

And he had a few actually. Like in my iPod, Nano or whatever the fuck that, like. He had so many good ones. Did you date him with the spiky spiky air? Like, was he doing gel in the morning? I think he's always done a little bit of spike. Like, there was, but there were times like a lot of spike. No, I think that's, I don't know.

Guys. He had a little bit of spike. It wasn't like a lot. a spike. Yeah, there were no highlights. No highlights at that point? Not at that point.

Okay. It was all dark. That relationship was on and off for years. Like you even tried like a third time that we don't. Yeah. Well, so the first time was on the show. Mm-hmm. And Ryan's amazing.

He's the nicest guy. He has such an amazing heart. Um, and he would give anything for his friends. and he I just I have nothing bad to say about him like he's great

but there is just something not there that clicked with me yeah it felt like from an outside I was talking about like you loved him so much as a friend knew he would be a great guy knew he'd be a great man but there wasn't like the

the lust as much maybe like the sexual yeah maybe that the lust but you were trying like you tried yeah because I knew he's such an amazing

amazing guy and we had the best time together. Like we were like two peas in a pod. Yeah. But I think from dating other people and having that instant like chemistry. Chemistry. Yeah. Like that there's different kinds of chemistry. Yeah. Something that like something was missing there. What's wild is you also had like a mini thing with Josh Henderson who is also Ashley Simpson's ex. Josh is like a really good, good friend. And we'd known each other for so long. And then when I ran into him, we went on a couple dates. And, like, it was flirty and it was so different meeting him, like, you know, years later compared

to when we all used to hang out. But nothing ever came of it. It was just kind of like a flirty fun date. Yeah. I mean, him and Ryan Cabrera versus, like, Justin and Corey, it's like two different worlds. Very different. Very, yeah. Like, you were trying to go for the good guy.

Like, you were trying desperately. You're like, he goes to church. Like, he sings about his mom, but it just didn't work. Okay. Two hotties for last. We have Chris Pine. Chris Pine, yes. I did.

Chris was amazing. And I met him in Vegas when I was with the sorority row girls at dinner. And I talk about that in the book. Yeah. We went on a couple dates or a few dates. And, you know, the paparazzi spotted me leaving his place. And then another time there was a fans that would take photos up. love us when we were out and then they'd give them to the press. So those things kept coming out

and it's like we couldn't just have a private relationship, even start to see if we wanted to even, if we wanted it to progress. Because it was already like, boom, a partridge in a pine tree. Like, we couldn't get away from it. Yeah. So that ended quickly. But he's a great guy. He's so talented. And Chase Crawford. Chase, yeah. She loves the pretty boys. I do. Yeah. You met him when you said Gossip Girl just came out, the Hills was like... Yeah, the Hills was at, like, just starting and getting popular. Yeah. He just started doing Gossip Girl.

So we all went to dinner here in New York and Blake lively was there with him and here with Eric Podwell. We all just hung out and had Sangria. And then I hadn't seen him in forever. And, yeah, we met and like, again, there was like sparks. I feel like back then I was so... She had sparks with everyone. Well, back then, I didn't because I was just with Justin.

So I, when I'm with someone, that's who I'm with. So outside of that, when I start meeting these people again, it's like, oh, like, why wasn't this there back then? Like, what is this? Yeah. But was at the time, I feel like Corey was always in the background and you kept on going back to that. Oh, yes. Corey was definitely in the background. Well, you know, there's no Corey now.

There are Instagram DMs that are open. And are you meeting guys? I am. So I am dating, which I'm trying to navigate with having a daughter, which is a whole new world. So I don't even- Dating one person or like you're like dating? I mean, I'm dating one person. Oh, is it serious?

Yeah. Oh. I haven't exposed to that yet. Oh. I really like him. How long has it been? A few months. Oh, wow.

Yeah, we talk about him a little bit on the podcast. He's my mystery man. So TBD. Are you going to keep a mystery? He's a keeper. I don't know. We'll see when I'm going to say who it is. Wait.

Okay. So just a hint. Is he famous or is he like? Maybe a little. A little. I'm excited. Okay. Adriena, it was so good to meet you.

This was fun. Choices was amazing. I loved it. It's an easy read. It's, I mean, it's not an easy read. It's a tough read at parts, but you really get to know Audrina's story. And there's so much to your life and everything that you went through that we didn't get on the hills because a lot, you know, at the times we got the stairs that you were talking about.

So this is taking you, spilling the tea, giving you the scoop. Giving you the scoop and a lot about who you are as a person, which is kind and gorge. Thank you. Thank you, Adriena. Choices is out now, everyone. Thank you guys so much for listening. to this episode of Not Skinny but Not Fat. Follow me on Instagram at Not Skinny but Not Fat.

Subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss any episodes. Rate the podcast that you love so much on Apple Podcasts and write a little review. If you tell me you did, I'll give you a big virtual smoocharoo. Thank you guys so much for listening and I'll see you next Tuesday.