Not Skinny But Not Fat - CHARLI D'AMELIO: TIKTOK FAME, MENTAL HEALTH & THE BARKERS

Episode Date: October 17, 2023

With over 150 million TikTok followers at just 19 years old, Charli D'Amelio discusses blowing up on TikTok, filming a reality show with her family, friendships in Hollywood, and her OCD. We also fawn over her boyfriend Landon Barker and how Travis and Kourt welcomed her, plus her life-changing conversation with JLo!Produced by Dear MediaThis episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct, or indirect financial interest in products, or services referred to in this episode.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Hey friend, I'm Nicole Walters, mom of three, your internet bestie and founder of Inherent Learning Company. If you're looking for the motivation you need to pursue a life of purpose, then join me each week on the Nicole Walters podcast as I share my hard learned lessons and answer your DMs about life, business, and everything in between. We'll laugh, we'll cry, and we'll grant ourselves grace as we do life together. Check out the Nicole Walters podcast every Tuesday here on Dear Media. You can listen anywhere you listen to podcasts.

This is Amanda Hirsch from the Not Skinny but Not Fat podcast. You might know me from Not Skinny Bonata on Instagram where I spend my time talking about reality TV, celebrities, everything happening, and pop culture. I also talk to some of our favorite celebs and reality TV. stars. We talk about what's going on. Tune in every Tuesday and just feel like you're talking with your best friends in your living room. I'm so excited. Charlie DeMilio is here. I don't know if you know her. You guys. I don't know. She only has 151 million just on TikTok. I think so. Yeah. Can I ask you, I'm wondering, like, when you get to a certain millions, does it not even matter anymore?

Like, 100, 120, 100, 140. Like, it's... Yeah, I think for me, because so much of this happened during COVID, it's really hard to understand that those are real people that are watching you. Even, like, over 500 people, like, anything above that I think is a lot. You can't see truly how many people it is. And I think it's almost better that way because it makes it really scary if you if you really think about it.

Think about how many people that is. Because I feel like I've seen creators with like smaller numbers, let's say, 3,000 people. Okay. And the way they talk about it is so I feel like helpful for newer people is like, imagine 3,000 people in a room. That's a lot of people that are choosing to follow you. And with you, I feel like, not imagining it is better. Because if you imagine 151 million, that's like, it's almost like

scary, the amount of people that can see the videos you're making by yourself. Because of that, do you overthink things that you put out, like knowing that so many people are watching? I think now, definitely a lot more than in the beginning. It's just scary because I don't know these people. They don't know me. they see the little videos that I make. It's really weirdly disconnected. The fans that I have been able to meet have been incredible. And those are the people that I feel like I make my videos for.

Even when I maybe don't want to or aren't feeling up to it, I think it's those people that really help me feel better about posting. Yeah, because you're like, okay, they're 151 million. How many of those are like the great people? people that I meet on the street. Yeah. And how many of those are hate watching or negative nancies or, you know, you don't, you can't really know like how it's made up. Yeah. Or even are these people I know are these people I've met? Are these people that were just randomly scrolling and like clicked follow by accident? You just think of the idea who these people are watching you. And you just have to

hope that they continue to enjoy whatever you make for them. Do you care about the numbers? Like, If I told you, Charlie, I could go through your followers and make sure that only the people that actually love you stay. And I can get rid of all the fucking negative nancy's and whatever, but you'll stay with 70 million. Would you do it? Yeah. Yeah?

I think it almost bothers people sometimes that I don't really think about being the best or being first or anything like that. I think it maybe bothers, like, my team, because to me, I only really want to do it if it's fun. Yeah. And I don't worry about things like that because whatever, like, if everyone decides to forget about me tomorrow, I have to live with that. So I try to just have as much fun as I can and not worry about the things that I can't control. Because you're only 19. Yeah.

Wild. Sounds like you have really good balance that you even have those thoughts of, like. Like, if it all goes away, like you have those thoughts. If it all goes away, like, I'll be okay. I'll do this. I'll do that. Like, you have those thoughts. Yeah.

I mean, I don't know how to handle it. I don't know how to think through all of it so much. I just tried to, I mean, I was always told, like, through this entire experience, like, it's going to go away. It's not going to be there forever. Like, not, no one's going to care about you as much as they do right now. So I've been prepared from the beginning that it's going. to, you know.

Like year one, you're year, what, four now? Yeah. You're like not going away, bitches. Yeah. So I think just preparing myself for the worst. That's kind of how I walk into every situation. Well, let's start from the beginning. Yeah.

Because for those of you that don't know, Charlie, you're from Connecticut. So New York must feel like home, homeish. Yeah. Yeah. Did you used to come out like to the city a lot? Yeah, I used to dance out here. So I would take the train after school, do my homework on the train. walk to whatever dance studio it is from Grand Central and then take the train back home.

Did you do Broadway Dance? Yeah, Broadway Dance Center, Ripley Greer, all of them. So that's the thing. I remember when you came out and people were like, who's this girl? Like, the difference between you and other dancers, dantsy TikTok people, I'll call it, is that you're an actual dancer. Yeah, I grew up training, dance and everything. I was a competitive dancer.

I never really bridge the gap to professional work. I did, like, little things here and there, little dance things that were outside of my studio. I was on, like, a hip-pop crew out here, which was really fun for a while. But I never broke out into, like. Did you want to, though? Yeah, I would do auditions and everything. I would always get cut. Like, I was always so close.

But you were so young, too. Like, did they allow 13-year-olds at all? auditions for backup dancing? Everything. There was there's little kids that were like six and seven that are better than I could ever imagine being. So it's hard to compete with those like young dancers because you're either like in the world like some dance studios that are competitive that in the professional world is like right next to each other. Like you meet the choreographers that are choreographing for all these people. I wasn't that. lucky. I think you got lucky later. Yeah. A lot of those Utah, Arizona, Los Angeles dance

studios, like it's very different. I was in Connecticut. So I didn't really get those same opportunities with the choreographers until a lot later, like right before I stopped competing was when I started to make all those connections. And then all of this happened. So it was kind of like a couple reroutes. So tell us how you started then on TikTok. Was it just random? Yeah. My, friends knew me as the dancer in the group so they would have me learn all the dance TikToks and then teach it to them so they can post it. This was before I even had my own account. Then I was just making videos at school in my school uniform with my friends. Very random. Yeah. But you started making them up though at a point though, right? Yeah, I did. I made a couple of the pretty viral dances.

I don't really think anyone knows which dances were mine because I never really was like. Taking credit. But, yeah, between making my own and following other people, it just kind of worked out perfectly. And people started watching a lot really fast. Tell me about that. So you're living in Connecticut, normalish life. Yeah, super normal. Super normal.

In high school. In high school. 15 is what? Ninth? I was in my sophomore year. Sophomore year with your friends hanging out. And then what? Did you go up by a million, like, in a day?

Yeah. I remember my first trip out to. LA. My dad was going out there for work. And I was like, I have a work opportunity. Can I go out there with you? And he was like, okay. He's always like, do whatever. How did what work? Do you remember what it was? It was like, I was going to famous birthdays and like doing their little videos. So I was going out there for that. Oh, I know what you're talking about. Wait, what does that mean? It's somebody's birthday and they like order. And yeah, it's this. I don't even know what you would call them. But They do these, like, YouTube videos, and I was ready to do one of those.

But it's, like, the actual thing kind of keeps track of famous people's birthdays. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, okay. So what they slid into your, like, TikTok DMs? How does that work? And they were like, we'd love to have you out and film a video. So I was like, okay, well, now I have a reason to go out there. Yeah.

And I was going to go and meet some friends. And I did, and it was great. And I started gaining followers really fast. There was, like, one point where I was gaining over a million followers a day. And that was pretty crazy. Was every video at that point going viral? I know that TikTok now is, like, everyone's fighting for, like, the viralness. Yeah, people used to screen record their for you pages.

And it would be, like, 60 videos about me in a row. And it was wild. And everyone was like, everyone was like, I had no idea. You were like, I was just going with the flow. Yeah. It started with everyone being like, oh, she's so cool. And then it was like, no, we have. hate her so everyone was talking about not liking me versus liking me and like you mean the internet

was yeah and it was just back and forth but everyone was making videos they were like if you have her in a video it'll go viral that was like what people were saying oh so you mean okay so you were going via i'm like ticot grandma so that's why i'm asking you were going viral you're dancing videos and then people you were showing up for people they started talking about you too in videos like duetting my video duetting and being like do we like her do we not yeah Did you guys know that hair thinning will happen to approximately one in two women? And if you're among them, just know you're not alone. It happens to everybody.

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family. And then COVID hit. So I was back in Connecticut for a couple months. And then did you think COVID was going to fuck your shit up? Like were you scared of like it affecting your growth? I don't even think I was thinking that far into it. I was just so there was so much going on. And I was just so excited to be a part of it. Like you were having fun with it at the beginning. Yeah. Yeah. I had so many friends. Everyone wanted to be my friend. I was like, this is great. Wait, when everybody wanted to be your friend

were you suss at all, of like, wait, this is weird. No, I was really naive. And I didn't realize how many people weren't actually my friends. You figured that out, it sounds like, by now. That realization was pretty hard. Like from Connecticut, like you're talking about hometown stuff, L.A. stuff. I had my friends in Connecticut. Those are the same people today.

still friends with them, love them to death. I can call them anytime, tell them anything. They're, like, the best. How do they feel about your success? Are they like, whoa? They go back and forth where it's like you're not special. Like, you're this. Well, you need that, though.

Yeah, like, you need that to ground you. But then it's fun. Like, my friends came to Coachella with me and they get, like, the crazy Coachella experience. Do you ever feel like you're welcome, you guys? No. It's like I brought my friends out for, it was one of my friends' birthdays. So it was like a fun little thing to do for their birthdays.

And honestly, it's life-saving to me because I'm like, oh, I get to go places with my friends. Yeah. Everyone I feel like loves to have their little group on like shoots with them. I'm always doing things either with my family or by myself. So anytime I do get to bring my friends with me, it's like. That's so cute. Is it hard that they're far though if they're in Connecticut, you're in L.A.? Well, they're all in college.

Oh. Any time they have a break. They'll come out. them come out to me. So it's really nice. Oh, that's really sweet. Yeah. But you're like, you're charged Emilio. Yeah. Does that ever get like, you know, they don't get the life that you're living or you have money and they maybe have less money. So like who's going to pay for dinner kind of vibes or like Venmo. Are they Venmoing you if you pay for dinner, you know? I guess not. Like, any time that I invite them to L.A., I feel like it's like I'm taking you here, taking you out of school.

you're coming to stay with me. Like, I have no problem handling that. Yeah. I'm the host, you know? You feel like the host. Yeah. Which is nice. Were you always that kind of a person? Like, even before you were making your own money? I always try to be. My parents always raised me. Like, you want to be able to take care of people. If you are inviting them out, like, you tip well. Yeah. All of that. I was raised with that mentality. My dad is very, like, you treat everyone with respect and kindness and handle your always take care of yourself even like my boyfriend and I go on dates and we're like fighting over the check yeah I'm paying it well I'm paying yeah I'd rather that than have to rely on it yeah I mean yeah you're definitely setting a an example of like a working woman

independent nine to five no not nine to five but no sometimes harder than nine to five I imagine I mean, I definitely, my job, I'm very, very lucky and it's pretty, for the most part, pretty laid back. I can dress however I want. I can say whatever I want. I don't really feel like I'm in a box, which is really nice. Yeah. But there's some times where it is a lot. Were you in one of those houses?

Yeah. Again, TikTok grandma. Yeah, I was never, like, living in the house, like, never under contract with anybody for my own sake. that was just not where I wanted to go. That's smart. How did you have that, like, intuition not to do that? My parents. Yeah?

Yeah. I always took a lot of guidance from them, and I really appreciate the fact that they helped me understand, like, hey, maybe you shouldn't do this. Yeah. Did you think about, did you, like, consider it back then? Yeah. The houses. Yeah.

It's really easy to fall into that. It's so shiny and new. Yeah. So what happened? Did you go there for a day and, like, make content? Yeah, I was always around. I was around a lot of the houses. Yeah. And I was kind of like the everyone wanted.

Didn't make content with you. Yeah. Wow. How did that feel good? Or, no, I don't want to make content with every single person now because you're so nice. I imagine like you struggled with that. It felt good. It felt good to be wanted. Yeah. But then when you're by yourself at night and you see like everyone else hanging out.

and you weren't invited. That's when it's like, oh, well, they wanted to hang out when I was doing something for them. But now it's like, well, you're too young. And it's like, well, you guys are just all at the house. Like, I can. Yeah. I don't really see the issue.

And I wasn't young enough to like be in your videos and do collabs, but I'm too young to hang out. Like that was a harsh reality for a while. Yeah. I can imagine that gets, I mean, L.A. can be like ruthless in that sense. Like everyone's trying to make it. Yeah. Everyone wants a piece of people that made it. Did you, do you feel like you learned how to navigate that better now? Like you're, do you have like that sixth sentence about people? I called a lot of, a lot of the people that didn't end up being who they were online. I feel like I had a pretty good intuition about it. Where a couple weeks before everyone else started to notice, I was like, I don't know if I trust them. There, it's something seems off. But obviously when you're the youngest, in the group and everyone else has their own opinions and are doing their own thing.

They don't always listen. But I ended up being right about a lot of stuff. So you have a good, like, intuition and moral compass. Yeah. But I also forgive really easily, which doesn't always help. Yeah, but I feel like it's good for, I saw this meme that was like, if you're holding on to stuff, you're doing damage to you. You know what I mean?

Yeah. I think it was just, I let a lot of people walk all over me. for a long time just because I was, I didn't know any better. Yeah. And that changed, you're saying. Yeah. Okay, good. Go strong, Charlie.

So what's different about you to me and noticing, like, TikTok today, which is different, I imagine. Yeah. Like, dances are not really the main event. Yeah. I used to think that was, like, what TikTok is. Because during your time. It was.

Yeah. That was it. Everyone was doing dances. And now everyone's putting on concealer. Right? Yeah. Do you do WMs? I mean, yes and no.

I try. I feel like for me, I didn't speak for a lot of, like, my time on TikTok. It was always music. That's the, I'm like jealous of that for you, though. Like, are you so,

because you took what you're good at and you did it and people like that and you didn't need to like, you know, be funny or. Yeah, I mean, everyone was like, she kind of has like no personality.

She doesn't really talk. But I love that. I think it's great. Did that offend you, though, if people said that? No. That didn't. Because I kind of like, kind of agree. What?

No, you don't. I just like to be to myself. Yeah. And not like talk too much. Now I definitely speak a lot more. But it's. Well, you're so soft spoken. It's crazy.

Yeah. Do you ever yell? Not really. Oh my God. I feel like my voice next to yours is like. like, Niels. I hate my voice, though. Really?

Yeah. What do you? Why? I mean, everyone does. So I guess that's a little, but you're so quiet. I sound so like, I don't know, just so timid. Huh. Like you wish she spoke with me.

Like, I wish I had a little base to my voice. Like, like to speak with more like, mm-hmm, like confidence. Like videos hearing myself speak is like the worst thing. Really? But that's everybody. Yeah. Don't feel bad about it. So I kind of do love that for you, though, that, like, you took something you were good at.

And at the time when you started, like, did you have any idea of, like, wanting to be famous? Did you grow up thinking about being famous or wanting, like, to be in Hollywood? My dream was to be a backup dancer. That was, like, only thing, only dream that I ever had. So I never expected to be in the forefront of anything. Uh-huh. Who was your main dream, like, backup dance for who? J-Lo and Lady Gaga.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. That would be so cool. They're just incredible. Did you ever think of like using your connections now to like get to, wait, you did do something cool though. I remember who did you do something very cool with at the beginning? Like J-Lo.

Yeah. You did something with J-Lo. Yeah. What was it? I got to dance with her like right before she did the Super Bowl. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Super fun. Got to dance on stage with Bibi Raksa, which was so fun.

Oh, yeah. I saw you speak about how she's like. Yeah. A clip. How did that connection happen? She was actually like the first person to reach out to me when this all started. And say what? Like I'm here for you. Yeah. She's just, she's always been someone that I kind of look at as like a second older sister. She'll tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. She'll be there to comfort you. But she's just like strong. Do you hang out or is it just like? Yeah. We definitely have. I just saw her at the VMAs and we like were sitting at a table. Her mom was there, which was that was my first. time I met her mom. Just like talking like normal people. She's so sweet. Yeah. And she's so like, she always stands up for herself, which I really respect like in the media. You were also on Dancing with the Stars. Again, you got to shine. You won. Were you like, you're competitive as a person. Definitely. So you wanted to win. I just heard Kaylyn Bristow won also. And she was telling

me like, as fun as it is, it's like the hardest thing. in the world. Yeah. It put me through a lot as far as like my personal life, but I also met the best people. Like my partner, Mark, and his wife have been such rocks for me during like the hardest times of my life. And I still like talk to them every day. They help me learn so much about myself. And my partner's like, he'll tell me, you need to stand up for yourself. Like, do you want me to call them and tell them that, like, you're not doing this and you're tired and you need to go to bed? I'm like, I'll tell them. Like, he just, he gets me. And he makes me feel like, first of all, proud of the things that I've done, but also, like, I can speak up for

myself. And your mom competed at the same time. Yeah. Who got cast first? Or was it together? We actually found out the same time. And we got cast together. How did you feel? What was your gut reaction? I didn't. want to do it. Yeah. I had stopped dancing and I didn't feel like I was at a point where I would do well. And I was just really intimidated. But I also had that feeling that was like, if I don't do it, is my mom still going to be able to do it? Like you wanted her to, oh. Why are you the cutest thing fucking ever? I meant like, were you bummed to do it with your mom? No. You wanted to do it with your mom. I wanted her to be able to do it.

because it was a dream of hers. And obviously it was a dream of mine too, but the reality of it just seemed too scary. And turns out my partner was thinking the same thing. And then it was just a match made in heaven. And one of the best to-date career opportunities I've ever had. Yeah. You would have regretted not doing that. Yeah. I'm so, I think it's my favorite thing I've done since I started. Wow. Because it's again, it's the dancing. And that's what, that's what you love. Yeah. But it's so wild, Charlie. that you're saying, like, you debated not doing it. And one of the motivators was, you know, your mom wants to do it.

And you were scared that they might pull the offer if you don't do it. Yeah. Wild. You're such a good girl. She's so lucky to have a fucking kid like you. Thank you. Would you want to do, like, more in that world of dance competitions, like, be a judge, be a, like something involved in that?

Absolutely. I mean, if they were to do, like, an all-star season, I would do it in a heartbeat. Yeah? Yeah. You heard that? Would you do, like, a tour? Yeah, we did. we did dancing with the stars tour.

And it was so much fun. I mean, that's really like your passion. Yeah. Everyone involved in that show. Like, crew, pros, everyone. It was the best time of my life. So I want to ask more about the TikTok stuff. It's like nowadays, when people become, you know, creators are online, I'm sure there's a lot that goes into it of like, what should I do?

How will I go viral? Like, I would say calculated, right? Yeah. Do you feel like there was any, like, would you attribute it like it was organic? It was natural as putting out videos. This would happen. Or was there a point in your career where you had to be more calculated about like, okay, how am I going to do? You know what I mean? Like, did you have that? I think I was wildly unprepared for anything. There's no rulebook of like, what are you supposed to do? What are you supposed to do? What are you supposed to do? I'm doing interviews. What am I supposed to talk about? I'm working with companies. I'm like what to say yes to? What to say? what to say no one's telling me what to do and I don't know what to do I'm I was 15 like I'm just trying to do my best I still can't even put an outfit together like I don't know how this works so I kind of just had to figure it out as I went yeah hoped that the people that were helping me

had my best interest at heart that was really all I could count on yeah and BB Rexa for some advice. First up, because she was at that point, like, were there any other, like, famous people or creators that you like, that you were like, hey, like, help me navigate this crazy world? I think my best times for advice, like, I remember one time, this is so crazy, but J. Lo actually asked me to come to her offices. And I went with my parents. And we ended up sitting and having such an amazing conversation. And I left asking my parents, like, did you guys set that up? Like, was that an intervention?

You can be honest because I was really struggling. And she told me exactly what I needed to hear without even knowing that I needed it. And I feel like everything that I've heard from these really influential people has been like a happy accident that just I really needed that today. And they didn't even know. Oh, wow. So what was the reason that she called you in just to meet you? Yeah, just to like talk, just to like see. what was going on.

Was this pre- Super Bowl or post? Post. Oh, it was after? So random. Crazy. Yeah. Do you love you? So she's one of your, the greats.

Yeah. She's, every time I see her, it's just been absolutely incredible. And I know. And by the way, you guys, J-Lo gets a lot of flak. She'll say too.

Like, people are like, she's a diva. She's, I got to interview her for something and everyone scared me. And she was the nicest ever. I was like, why does she get that rep?

Protective, especially. at the time I was so young, you could tell she was like mom instincts. It was really sweet. Oh, that's fun. And I think she just, when it comes to work, she knows what she likes. Yeah, she's the boss. I think that that's awesome. I'd so much rather that than have someone that, well, I don't know, like, whatever works for you. When it comes to doing something that they're passionate about, you want to execute it how you're envisioning it. Yeah. I think that's really cool. And tell me about bringing your family into the, fame world. Because Dixie's also, like, huge. And your parents are on the reality show,

the D'emilios. And they're also known in their own right now. Did you ever imagine that would happen? Like, at the beginning, I'm assuming you thought like, okay, here I am, like, blowing up. Did you think your family would come into it too? Definitely not to the extent that it has. I feel like I've always been very close to my family. family. So when it came time to moving across the country, definitely. I was 16 when we moved. I mean, it makes sense to move with my parents. I'm not going to move there by myself. And even now, like, I live with my sister. My whole family's in New York City with me. All doing their own way. Well, you live with your sister by, by yourselves? Yeah, just us too. Oh, you don't live in the house with

your parents anymore? No. When did you move out? I was 17, like two years. What? Yeah. And wait, How old is Zixie? She just turned 22. I can't believe both of you were living alone. Yeah. Like doing, but like how are you doing your own, you know, food shopping, your own bills, your I mean, I'm assuming you have like some help with those things. Yeah.

But like are you, you feel like you're really like, have your own household vibes. I order my own postmate. I cook sometimes, not really. What was the decision to move out, like, of your parents' house? Dixie wanted to move to a house. house and she wanted a roommate. And she was like, I've lived with you before. I feel like sense. And I was like, okay. And then a week later, we like moved into a house together. It worked out really perfectly. Were your parents, like, upset that you guys were leaving? I expected

my mom to be in tears. And she wasn't? No, but my dad was really upset. And I didn't expect that. He was like, you don't have to go. Yeah. I really don't have to go. I mean, it is a young, well, I guess technically, like, you would have gone to call. college or something. You guys know I'm your Macy's correspondent. I'm always here to tell you about Macy's updates, Macy's news, Macy's sales. And right now, Macy's lowest prices of the season sale, L POS, lowest prices of the season, is here from October 13th until October 22nd.

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like, ugh, why is your engagement so much better? No. In the beginning, before she was even on social media, all she did was make fun of me. I was like, this is so stupid. Like you're embarrassing stuff. Yeah. And then she did it. So did you like, were you like, excuse me? When I hit a million followers was when she started her account. Did she think she was starting it in a like a professional like theater way? Or did she start as like a personal thing? Just for fun. We were all doing it for fun. Yeah. Yeah. When you met all those like house people, I'm assuming some of them were more like calculated. Like I'm going to be famous. Yeah. Yeah. And so not everybody's like you. I mean, I feel like you guys with the D'Amalio show, season three is coming out soon.

There is some Kardashian vibes of like a family. Everyone's in business together. You have the D'emilio brands. You're like a whole empire and that's what kind of they are. And now you're dating Landon who's also, everyone's in the fan. So are you getting any advice from them on like, I mean, they're, I feel like the best people to give you advice. Yeah. I mean, they're wonderful.

Yeah. They're so sweet. I've definitely, I think there's been one time where I like, I went to his house and he still lives with his dad. And I think there's been like one time where I was like genuinely distraught. And they kind of helped me. They talked me out of it a little bit. But I think overall they're so supportive. Yeah, they came to your, some of your performances and Dancing with the Stars. And Courtney even like posting my perfume. Like, little things like that. Yeah.

It's just, like, she really didn't have to do that. And it means a lot. And just day to day, like, obviously we see each other when there's no cameras around and how truly, like, kind they are. Yeah. It's really incredible to have that type of energy, like your boyfriend's family. Yeah. It's really nice.

And especially Courtney, like, her vibe is more like, you know, she, like, has the fame. She doesn't, like, she's not obsessed with it. She loves the boundaries. She loves the family. So you got a good future step, not step, step mom-in-law. Yeah. Whatever it's called. Yeah, I think so.

Yeah. It's really great. Yeah. I've always felt. Did you watch their show? I've seen some of it, but I, it was the second day that Lana and I were hanging out together. He's like, want to go to dinner with my family? And I'm like, okay.

Weird. I'm, like, ripping my closet apart. Like, it's not just, like, you're meeting. Yeah, it's like Travis Barker and, yeah. This is scary. And I think from day one, they were always, like, making sure that I- Wait, so really your second hangout was with his family? Yeah.

Wow. So I've, they've always been open arms with me. That's so sweet of him. Did that turn you on as like, what a nice boy, like, that that's the second hangout? It definitely threw me a little bit at first. I was like, oh, my goodness, this is so crazy. We're not that serious yet, Landon. But it was, it was really nice.

And also if he got his dad's, like, love abilities. Yeah. You know? Like, Travis is such a good fucking partner and, like, loves so hard. Yeah. Did Landon get that from him? Yeah. He's, like, thoughtful in the ways that you don't think of.

Like, even he's watching my dog at home. And just, like, he asked to take her. He's like, can I watch? trouble while your win. Sure, why not? Like sending me photo updates and just everything that he can do to go out of his way he does. That's so cute. How did you guys meet? Well, we had like had mutual friends and everything. But my sister saw him out one night and we were talking. I was like, oh, I'm so bored and like lonely. My friends had canceled plans on me. And she was like, oh, I saw Landon. She was like, you should DM him. And I was okay. And we ended up hanging out that night. And then.

Stop. You made the fur. You slid in. I did. And he answered. How quickly did he answer? Three minutes. No. Oh, my God. Wait, DM on TikTok or Instagram? Instagram. So are you more of an Instagram girl now? I think messaging wise. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Does TikTok even have messaging? I never use it. Huh. Wow. So if Charlie slides into anybody's damn, they see it, right? It like pops up no matter what. Tell me about the music stuff. because Dixie was doing music stuff. And then season two of your show, you started dabbling.

Is that still a passion? Do you think it's something you want to continue with? Right now, no. Was it just for fun? Yeah, it was something that I wanted to do. Like, no pressure. I just want to see what it's like. Have fun.

Do it for no reason. And then it turned into something that was a little bit more like, okay. So now we need to put it out. And I was like, all right. And I don't know. I feel like it was fun when it was just for myself. Yeah. Would you ever do acting?

Yeah. That you would. Yeah? I think it's so fun. Yeah. That was one thing that my dad always said. He thinks I'd be really good at. So I feel like I have to try it at least once for him.

Yeah. That's so cute for him. I love it. Another big storyline on the show, or not even storyline, but like, theme is mental health. And like you and Dixie are both open about struggling. with that. Where is your biggest struggle with mental health? Is it anxiety? Yeah, I think anxiety is a big part of it. I've always really struggled with getting my anxiety under control and like nerves. Like when you say anxiety, is it like nervousness? Yeah, nervousness and like

panic attacks. I've always struggled with that. I think always. Since when? I was I was really young. Third grade. Really? Yeah. Do you still get them? Very rarely. Do I ever get like a true panic attack? Oh, good. How did you get that under control? A lot of therapy and a lot of figuring out ways to help. I still, like, before I left for New York, I had to call my mom and like have her calm me down because I was just so panicked. About what? You did the VMAs? Yeah, just traveling. Traveling. Traveling really stresses me out.

Like the airplane? No. Airplane doesn't. I have OCD, so leaving my space with all of my things. Like you have clinical, like you were diagnosed with it. So that's something that leaving my stuff is really hard for me. So I'm always like traveling is a lot. And you travel a lot.

Yeah. So I'm assuming because of that do you make choices like you'll only travel if it's like really important or like if you really want to do it or are you up for anything um i'm up for anything it i just have to prepare myself the right way but that's like having it's kind of i like to say it's like two things fighting like ADHD and oCD together you have both yeah make it really hard to understand how you're feeling and then deal with it because yeah i'm obsessing over this but now I'm feeling like I need to obsess over 10 things. And it's like the amount of post-it notes around my room so I can feel organized with all my reminders and like, don't forget this. Don't

forget that. Don't forget this. Now I need to like make sure that it's on right and is it the right color. That's the stuff that no one really sees. Yeah. But I've definitely been working more on getting that under control. Well, good. And like it's so good that you're open about it. I'm sure it helps so many people that follow you and so many young people. Is your demographic still really young? Like, are they your age or they might? Like, are they older? It's a little bit everywhere. Yeah. A lot of young girls, a lot of girls my age, some college age. And then a lot of parents, because they're kids. Yeah. I feel like parents, I was just, I just saw somebody podcasting here. And it was like, I'm having on Transmule. She was like,

oh, my God. Like, my daughter would freak out. So like, yeah, the parents know you or their daughter. Like, can you walk down the street in LA? Like, what happens? I mean, yeah. Yeah. I feel like you can go to, like, a bougie restaurant. Yeah. Depends where I am. Yeah. For sure. Like, you could go to, like, maybe not to a jamba juice, but you could go to, like, a fancy restaurant and be fine. Yeah. Yeah. I feel that. Okay. We're almost done, but you're amazing. You do things with your a lot, but you also do things on your own. Like, you say, you do a lot with your family. What's your preference? Like, do you like having them as, like, a cushion. I like doing things on my own. Yeah. I feel like you are Courtney. Oh my God. That was

a storyline on the last season. Yeah. I love being able to do things by myself just because I get more nervous in front of my family. And I think sometimes it's a little harder to open up when you have like your mom and dad right next to you. Because they can kind of fill in the blanks for you. Yeah. But I go back and forth. definitely this year I've enjoyed trying things on my own, though. Cool. And tell me about the show, though, because you are a little bit shy and soft-spoken and private and mysterious.

So how does that add up with, like, being on a reality show and, like, filming your life for everybody to see? Probably not the best. But how did that come about? Like, were you down? Did you have to be convinced? I don't think I really knew what to expect. And I think it's a little hard.

Like, I've got a very dry sense. of humor that a lot of people don't always get and they think I'm coming across like rude but like it was a joke. I feel like getting through all of that stuff is really hard, but it's also sometimes you say things that maybe I didn't mean it like that, but that's how it came across or in the heat of the moment. Like I was just having a really bad day and I got so upset and I didn't need to. It's like things like that that are a little bit frustrating after you're done filming because you're like, really good. Do you guys have control or you producers and stuff?

Yeah, we are executive producers on the show, but you also, you know. You let, yeah, you're not going to like take out everywhere where you don't look amazing. So are you excited for the new season to come out? Do you think we're going to see like a different side of you and the fam? I'm excited but nervous. I think throughout filming this past season, it was a lot. What was a lot? going through a lot and I think it was such a transitional period and they just caught us at some

of the worst times where like Dixie and I are screaming arguing at each other and and their cameras and you forget that they're there so it's also like having to relive these not so perfect times four times because you're you're filming it and then you're talking about it and then you see the cuts of the episodes and then it's out and you see what everyone else is saying. about it. Right. A little scary. So, but probably now you just kind of want to get it over with. Yeah. Like, have it come out. Let me deal with it. And have it be behind me. Would you keep doing it? Like the Kardashians, like for like 10 years? If everyone else wanted to, I would. Yeah. It's definitely like all of the things that were happening are already resolved now. So at least knowing that,

I'm like, I feel good about it. I heard that you don't drive. Why? I hate it. Like scares you? Yeah. Like you're scared to get. into an accident. I'm scared of being in control of a car. Really? Like, it's really, really nervous. Have you driven a few times? I have my license. Yeah. I don't. I've driven twice since I got my license, like a couple of months ago. I just, I like it. So what do you do? Do you, does somebody drive you? Do you have a driver? Yeah. For like certain like work. Yeah. Someone take me or like a, like, like, you want to go to one. I just, I don't really. You don't leave her house? No. You order everything in. Yeah. Landon doesn't drive either. What? Wait, why doesn't Landon drive? He just doesn't like, he just hasn't gotten his

license. Oh my God. He says he's like a great driver. Okay, prove it, Landon. Then you don't. We both can't drive. No, that is hilarious. Yeah. Okay. We need to get on, if he doesn't have, you're, you have a fear. That's okay. Yeah. If Landon just didn't get around to it. You should be driving me everywhere. Yeah. And then this would be. perfect. And it's kind of hot when a guy like drive stick or something. Yeah, right? Yeah. Do you watch any reality shows? Yeah. What do you watch? Jersey Shore. You do? What? Like the family

where you, like, the oldies? I'm like up to date. Only reason I haven't seen this past week's episode is because Lana and I watch it together and I'm waiting until I get back. So we'll have two episodes next week. Did both of you love it independently? And then met and we're like, we both love Jersey Shore. Did one of of you start watching because of the other. Well, actually, I was doing dancing with the stars with Vinny. And I was like, after it ended, I was like, okay, I need to watch the show.

Oh, it was after that you started? Yeah. Oh, my God. That's so funny. And you loved it. That is so random. I love it. So no, like, Bravo stuff. Bravo or like... Not really. Did you meet any celebs that, like, disappointed you that weren't, like, who you thought they were going to be? No. No. Another question for you about celebs. So many breakups lately, have you noticed? Do you care about, like, entertainment news?

Are you interested in, like, what's happening in, like, the celebrity world? Are you like, oh, my God? Yes. And Joe and Sophie broke up. Sometimes with, like, certain things, I'm like, okay, well, let me actually get to the bottom of this because, like, I know people that know. Oh, you're like, if I'm in it, then I'm going to get the tea. Yeah.

Got you. But there's always, like, it's, I keep pretty up to date. but some things, I just have no idea. So who's your favorite actor? Ooh, maybe like Sarah Polson. She's amazing. I love her. She's really great.

And favorite musician? Dixie. Yeah, Dixie. And who else? Pimstones. Okay, of course you like, like cool music that I haven't heard of. Like sad music. Oh, it is?

Are you emo? I don't think so. Okay. Is Landon emo? I don't think so. Both of you kind of give a little. He, like, can lean more punk. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I can see that. I don't know. I feel like I'm pretty basic. Keep it pretty basic. Do you think that people still think of you as a kid, like, because you started as a kid? And you, I mean, you're not a kid. You're a teenager, technically. Wait, when's 20 for you?

May. Oh, you're May? May what? First. Okay, so not a Gemini. I was like, you do not give Gemini. I'm a tourist. Mm, very stable.

I look crazy. What are you? Gemini. Oh, okay. A lot of crazy. I'm going to tell you, I have some Gemini friends, and I love that. Yeah, we're very cool. I get the, like, two-faced thing. Yeah. I've seen it's, like, personal and work mode.

Yeah. I feel like that's great. Yeah. I love that in a Gemini. Yeah. So determined. I think it's great. Do you care about, like, astrology and stuff?

I do. Yeah. I think it's fun. Yeah. To dabble, not to, like, become obsessed. Yeah. Charlie, you're an angel on our. Thank you for coming on my show.

Yes, of course. Thank you guys so much for listening to this episode of Not Skinny but Not Fat. Follow me on Instagram at Not Skinny but Not Fat. Subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss any episodes. Rate the podcast that you love so much on Apple Podcast and write a little review. If you tell me you did, I'll give you a big virtual smoocharoo. Thank you guys so much for listening and I'll see you next Tuesday. Please note that this episode.

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