Not Skinny But Not Fat - Corona, Comedy, and The Bachelor w/ Jared Freid

Episode Date: February 23, 2021

My favorite guest to complain with and discuss all things Bachelor, Comedian Jared Freid is on and like always, he makes me LMFAO. We talk about the new normal. corona, queantatine, and annoying people. Jared tells me his hot takes re Matt James as the bachelor, and I tell him which celeb slid into my DMS and made my life complete. ELF Cosmetics: Get 25% off your e.l.f. purchase of $40 or more! Go to ELFCOSMETICS.com/notskinny and use code NOTSKINNY Spanx: Use code NOTSKINNY for 10% off at Spanx.com Imperfect Foods: Get 20% off plus FREE shipping at imperfectfoods.com with code NOTSKINNY Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a dear media production. This is not skinny but not fat, and I'm your host, Amanda, bringing you the latest in all celebrity gossip, reality TV recaps, and anything happening in Hollywood right now that I just can't keep my mouth shut about. This is not skinny but not fat. that. Okay, you guys, my favorite episodes are actually not with reality stars that I have to prepare for, but are with my friends from other podcasts and that love to talk about the same shit that I love to talk about. And a comedian, Jaron Freed. Jaron, we're such good friends that I'm now, what am I, the fake creator of 902 and O.

What's going on? I was trying, you know what I think it was? You do such good intros whenever you do your podcast and you're like, and I was trying to be you with an intro that I usually don't do. Listen, don't. I practice that intro in the mirror. Like I'm a loser for being good at the intro. He's so good at the intro.

I will, because I do it on state. I do it for stay. I host a lot of shows. So like I'm used to that. Like the idea of like like I like I'm spinning. plates while being like and can I get you another drink while I'm like and now coming to the stage Amanda hers you know like I you know guys I should have come naked because I'm gonna sweat it's like the podcast with Jared I sweat because you make me laugh and I sweat shit no I'm actually

upset do you remember when I was pregnant we did a podcast Jared freed everybody we did a podcast and I was pregnant and I I confess to you after that I had to take off my pants mid podcast Because I But it was with you that we talked about How people think podcasting is like easy It's just like having fun you're talking But you said it so perfectly You were like we are aggressively

Talking Yeah we are in a zoned in conversation Like It's basically Taming a podcast is a First date with someone Your family introduced you to Like you're like I can't fuck this up

I have to answer every question correctly I have to say the right thing. You know, like, you're just, and by the end of that date, you're like, oh, I just want to look at my phone for like 20 minutes and have my brain go to mush. Like, you have to be on every work. So it is an exertion of some sort. And I don't think you and I, like, we don't take ourselves too seriously. Like, we don't sit there being like, the horrors of taping these podcasts. Like, this isn't to say we go to like, you know, the coal mine to go to work.

But it is, it's just mentally exhausting. Just wear light clothing, is all I'm saying. Yeah. Wear like clothing. But I was saying this before we started with you. It's so nice. I don't know. I just said it.

See? And I can fuck up. I didn't say it before. I said it now. Is that it's, it's, it's, it's, it's just nice to have you on. It's like I, it's, and also you guys, I want to just tell you. Jared isn't doing me any favors who are coming on the show. He's using and abusing me to promote himself.

That's right. That absolutely. Listen, it's mutually beneficial. that's what it's for we get a good episode but listen here's the thing we it's always good to have another podcaster on because you know having someone on that goes and I went to the park

and then they shut up and you're like did that that went is that the answer to the question that's all you have here today that's how you became and you only had them on because they have a huge following and you figure well they must be this glowing personality it's like no they they take a picture well

and they're good at being on a produced show where they fucking have writers. And then they don't share it. And then they don't share your... They're above sharing it. And then they don't share your episode and you're like, cool.

That was cool. You couldn't even do stories, you asshole. Like, you couldn't even do stories. I'm not asking for a feed post. I had you on... A feed post. Are you high? What is your own?

Sometimes, I mean, like, they're acting like I'm asking for one. Like sometimes the worst is when a publicist reaches out to you and then you have them on and then they treat you like as if like you beg them to come on. That's nice. I hate guest pitches. Anyone listening now. I fucking hate guest pitches and it's always someone I don't know.

It's like, hey Amanda, we thought you'd like to have on Celebrity Chef in Tokyo. Like, no. I do know what my podcast is? You're totally right because the way you said it. is they make it seem like, oh, you would like this person. I hate when someone says me something and goes, you would think this is funny. We don't know each other.

I give you the funny. And then you laugh, but this isn't like a two-way street. Like I just like, you know, oh, we are sure you're going to love this person. No, I actually hate most people I come in contact with. And then I decide if I love them within our conversation. I go, oh, 15 minutes in, I go, oh, I actually like this person. That's how long, you and I, we had the same thing. I showed up your apartment.

And you'll probably like, look at this douche. Wait, no, you guys, I want everyone to understand there was a time before COVID. Jared Freed shows up in my door with a coffee, like typical New Yorker, like grumpy, grumpy. You were grumpy. Yes, I wasn't happy. Something had happened, but that usually happens. And I'm like, isn't he supposed to be like a comedian? Like, why isn't he making me laugh upon arrival?

So, like, imagine, I'm like, in my house, I'm like, hey, get my. morning. It was legit like Sunday morning. It was, it was like Sunday fucking. If we went back, Jared, would we have done it in Zoom? Like, do you get what I mean? Like, when Corona passes, are we going to still use Zoom or are we going to like see people again? I think I'll, Zoom will be an option. I do think that there's something great about being in the room with someone. I do think it makes it funnier. I think especially when like the people know each other, it gets better. If you don't know the person and they're like putting up a fight, I'm like, yeah, just pop on a Zoom.

Like, this is just the option that like, I say it for dating all the time. Put people in the position where they would be ridiculous to give you an excuse. And it's like, hey, you want to get on Zoom any hour of the day, any time of the week? Oh, you don't. You're busy. Good to know. You don't want to do my fucking show. Like I think at least I have that, you know, arrow in my.

quiver. So I do think it's Zoom is going to continue, but I think also like, you know, you're seeing it with a lot of podcasts now. They're like getting their own like now rent is cheap. They're finding places to do like a little studio thing. Like there's there's some value to that, I think, especially with video and stuff like that. And listen, I know it took me a while because I am not the social butterfly that people think I am. And I actually enjoyed the beginning of quarantine at least, or not the beginning, probably like the first year. And I think only now, I'm like, I want people. I want meetings. I want in person. Like, I want, like, I want to be, you know, I do. Only now I feel like that's it. Sorry to interrupt you guys really quick. Imperfect foods. Such a cool freaking concept. Okay. We all have imperfections. Why do we hold our groceries to a different standard? Get your groceries from imperfect foods to help create a kinder.

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Foods today to save time, money, and food from going to waste. Right now, Imperfect Foods is offering you guys 20% off plus free shipping on your first order when you go to Imperfect Foods. and use promo code not skinny. Try imperfect foods now for a limited time. Get 20% off plus free shipping on your first order. Go to imperfect foods.com and use not skinny to sign up. That's 20% plus free shipping and perfect foods.com. Offer code is not skinny. Jared Freed is currently sitting flush faced. I have a nice Nice tan going. Yeah.

Nice pan going. He's in Florida. His parents are there. So don't hate on him. His parents are there. He's visiting his parents. Because I love how people like I'll put up a Kardashians and they're like, they're traveling. There's a pandemic.

And I'm like, yeah, they've been traveling. Like, you know, I'm just saying in my celebrity world, we're not going to get into pandemic shaming or mask shaming or shaming, shaming. Just it's funny because it's like I'm past the point of like. judging you know what I mean well I think I'm here's the thing I I kind of like live in the world of like everyone's just trying to like live and do their best and like the people online that are like they're vacationing I have the least respect for those people in the entire world that actually makes my blood boil because I go why don't you say that to your dad you don't

agree with politically why don't you go talk to your mom your cousin there are people that you could talk to that have actual stakes that aren't a Kardashian. Like, and again, like, there's Chadenfreude. It's fun that it does serve as a part of your brain where you get to like, be like, look of these jerks. And like, we're all guilty of that.

But I'm like, I think over the course of this past year, year, almost a year now, we are all going a little crazy listening to people that, you know, they weren't, the people yelling at people, I don't think those people were going out before. I don't think those people like the thing that got me so annoyed were the people that were like stay the fuck home when it's like you you'd ever have left home before

like I want to see your tax returns that tell me how much you have to leave home in general like it was never like a person that was the cashier at Walmart being like stay the fuck home it was always the person who could stay the fuck home and it was always the person that would be like well I had it in March so now I can just talk shit And it's like, I actually, you know, I'm putting out a stand-up special that's all about 2020,

and it's all about this subject. The, you know, there is, and it's like, listen, it's okay to have problems, but I think in 2020, 2020, 2021, we're all embarrassed of our problems because we know someone doing worse than us. So, like, it's like, when do you get to complain? Like, I love complaining. I love coming on your podcast. We complain together. We are of the same.

where it's like, I love a complaint and it's almost therapy, it's almost meditation. And it's like, there were a lot of people out there that were like snipers just trying to take that away from people to live on a moral mountain top. And it's like, listen, I saw a couple, Amanda. No, I saw a family. It was Thanksgiving.

I was down here with my family for Thanksgiving. We're sitting here. And I saw this family. It was like, there were like 15 of them. And they were all doing a Thanksgiving outside on a field. Like they were at a, I was at high school field working out. and they were like near me on the field, but like, you know, talking and having their family get together. And then none of them are wearing masks, which is fine. They're all family. They're all

outside of a field, whatever. Who am I to say whether it's fine or not? I don't know anything. I'm not a fucking doctor. I'm not a scientist. So I have no right to say anything. All of a sudden they go, let's take a picture. And the grandma goes, put on your mask, everybody. And it's like, who are you putting on the mask for? I, again, I'm putting out the stand-up special. It's all about this, like the people that look at you and go. We get it, Jared. You came on to promote the stand-up special. I'm going to push. Push, push. When does it come out? When does it come out? March 2nd. It's coming out on YouTube because look it. See, we all have issues. No one would buy my special. So I have to put it out

for free. First of all, so many people would buy your special. I tried. We basically what happened was I had a show on New Year's Eve and I was like, let's tape it. I have 30 minutes of COVID material. I have 30 minutes of material just about 2020. where again, if you're listening right now, this is my perspective. And I think Amanda, you and I get along really well because we're similar where it's like,

we're going to talk shit, but also like let's let people fucking live and let's people, you know, like there's a middle gray area to everything in life. And that's kind of my perspective on state. The middle gray area though is like exactly what we think.

Do you get what I'm saying? What do you mean? It's like, okay, but let me try to explain myself. Is that, is that, Our gray area is exactly defined by how we define it. Well, that's, well, that's a thing.

Like, admitting to. You're annoying to judge, but I can judge this amount. Sure. I mean, I, I think that was like the, that's the main theme of 2020 is like self rationalizations. Like, okay, like, that's like me talking about the family being like, yeah, they're outside. They're fine. Like, who am I to fucking say? Exactly.

Exactly. That's what I mean. But I think you and I both catch ourselves in those things and at least we're aware. Like the person being like, where was their mask? Well, okay. Now I want to put a chip on you and follow you around to the rest of your life to see if you wear the mat. You know what I mean? So I put out the special.

So I had 30 minutes of COVID material. I was like, I'm doing a show on New Year's Eve. What an opportunity. So we got five. I got a whole camera shoot. I paid for it. We put together this like it's a beautiful special that could go on Netflix, any, uh, HBO, star. And it could be on TV.

You could put it on. And then I was like, let's, now I have this piece that the material is, I hope to God, this material makes no sense a year from now because it will mean we've moved past it. So I was like, what do I do with it? So let's put it on YouTube and anyone who's listening can make a night of it, put it on your airplay, put it on the big TV, it looks great. I love the jokes. I love the topics I'm talking about.

And it's like, again, it should be therapeutic for people who. think like us the the judgy people who don't want to be judged you know like I really do I'm like very happy with it but it's like again I do think we get caught in this world and you and I live in this world of online where it's like you're either that or you're that and it's like and it's like I don't know I just want to fucking eat I'm so excited I swear because I remember when you came over like a grumpy McGrump face back in uh whenever that was and then slowly I was like There he is

That was When was that? And then no I remember when it was You were gonna do a show And I was like I'm coming Like you're sending me tickets for free I hope you know Absolutely

Yeah And I even told my sister I was like you're gonna come with me Like whatever I think that episode that you came on Was bring her back to a song Well it might be a year ago now Like if I'm thinking about it right

Because it was before It was The Bachelor had just ended. Barb was like, bring her back to us. Like, we lived in a simpler time where it was just Barb was the major scandal on the Bachelor. That was life. It was like, let's talk about Barb. I was dying.

I peed my pants and you were like, come to the show. And then the show got canceled because COVID-Oven. So I'm definitely going to make it a night. I swear, I'm going to watch it. And all of you should watch it as soon as it's available on YouTube. I'm so excited. Wait, so when you make it. Did you know it was going to go for fan YouTube or you're like, I'm going to make it and then decide, like, what I'm going to do with it?

The idea is like, listen, I, everything, you and I, we do the same. Everything we've done has been like, I have to do it. Like, no one's coming to me being like, hey, Jared, you're so funny. Why don't you make this like, no one's ever done that for me. And I don't expect it. So I'm like, hey, we're putting this on YouTube. Let someone stop us was kind of the thing. Like, I'm making this to look good enough to be on.

any network, any streaming service, so that it has, it's in the game. Like, no one could look at it and go, I don't know. You know, it looks like it was made on an iPhone. Like, I, like, I wanted people to, like, have no excuse other than they don't. You want to be the comedian of Justin Bieber's and have an usher, have an usher find you on YouTube is what we're going for. Well, here's the thing to the audience at home. Like, if you enjoy it, please comment, please like it. Like, that stuff is like I consider currency to me.

Like, listen, if this gets a million views, then my life is better. And, you know, that's just genuinely the truth. Yeah. So, like, people and, like, people outside of our world are, like, where views to them don't matter because it's not currency to them. It is currency to me that people watch this and enjoy it and like it enough to, like, give a like or whatever. Because also YouTube is the dregs of society. YouTube commenters are the meanest, most angriest. They will see just my face and be like, oh, it looks like, you know,

it looks like Rosie O'Donnell from a league of our own. And I'll be like, oh, my God, it's the end of my life. Wait, is it because they can be completely anonymous? Because, like, you make up a username or something? How does it work? That's part of it. And it's just YouTube has that thing. Like, I think, like, Instagram, you see different type of hate than YouTube.

Like, YouTube, I think there's people genuinely on there just waiting for new videos to pop up to just write the most heinous horrible thing. So like I need nice comments to push up the screen and again I don't want to read it and then I'll be depressed.

Like doing stand-up is my favorite thing in the world. Like that's like my life. Like I've been doing it for like 11 years almost. Like I've never put out stand-up. Like I was like before this all happened like I was approved to go on the Tonight Show and like I was going to do a five-minute set.

And like then this happens and it's like, yeah, we have. no tonight show like get out of here so now i'm like back in the the hopper with like everyone else and it's like so it's like for me like and and like listen i i have friends with netflix specials and i'm in that world so it's like you know you want to be able to put your own stuff out there and also like for stand-up there's there needs to be like i need like a bookmark and like i had all this coven material just talking about the social aspects of like how we talk differently and how I went in a cab.

I went in an Uber in Dallas and the guy was like, do you want me to put my mask on? Like that type of thing that you're only dealing with in 2020 where you're like, yeah, I do want you to.

Like, even though I'm in Dallas, I took a plane there. I'm in the Uber. Like I'm playing along with the same fucked up, you know, make everyone feel good game, but just go along

so I don't have to talk to you about it. Like that type of shit where I'm like, okay, I can't put, this out of year from now. I don't want to be talking about this forever. Let's just because already I was doing shows on street corners

in New York City. Like I was doing like on top of, you know, dumpsters like a cat in a Disney movie. Like I'm like singing for like, you know, you know, whatever. And like, I'm already hearing jokes that I'm rolling my eyes at someone. Someone was like, oh, my breath smells so bad from this mask. And I'm like, oh my God, I'm going to be that guy. If I don't...

And you're going to be like, so. Yeah, social distancing, right? Like while everyone's like arm and arm around each other. It's now or never. It's now or never. Everyone watch it. I swear in my life I'm going to. Thank you.

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Go to spanks.com. Just talking about that, you know, our world and online and social media. I feel like at the beginning of quarantine, people were like, what do we do? Like, we usually listen to a podcast on the road. So like, how do we listen now? And I feel like once we were like, oh, we're going to be home all the time. I feel like everyone really looks for just funny people and just escapism on the internet. And I feel like, you know, I'm sure you're feeling that like people are coming to your page.

maybe more and needing those laughs and needing that like relief from their grandma in the hospital or or well even like even more now than it was before when everyone was like hustling and bustling. You know what I mean? Even more than that like I don't mean to like keep hating on this person but I hate them so much. The person that comments on your like first of all you are a source of energy for people, your account, the things you put out your podcast because. What people are going is, like, everyone is dealing with that one person where everything leads back to COVID. Like, they can't take one five-minute break.

You're like, yeah, so I got coffee today. Who even gets coffee anymore? It's like, well, I did. Like, do I have to feel bad about that too? Like, you're talking about a celebrity couple? Where's their mask? And it's like, that person, like, beyond grandma on the hospital, like, that's horrible. But, like, just exhausting human being that you've done.

dealt with, and you've always known they were a little bit miserable, a little bit crazy. And now, like, this has taken them to the nth degree, like, to take a break from that and just talk about celebrity gossip or talk about the bachelor or talk about a real housewives thing. Like, what a pleasure to, like, take your brain, put it on the shelf. Because right now, like, again, you just had a, had a baby. Like, I love seeing the picture of the baby. like when I see a picture of your baby I go oh this is like a baby moment like I'm like happy to have a baby moment like and that sounds stupid but it's true and it's like we all need just a little bit of like we need that oh I'm not crazy here you know like I'm and also hope is that at an all time low like people are having less babies than they've had ever really like if yeah babies are down everyone thought we're going to go into quarantine and start fucking uh-uh guess again we wouldn't into quarantine and we looked at everyone and we were like, ew, get away from me. Listen, honestly, oh my God, that is true.

Yeah, worldwide. I have to think about it because I, my husband has been pissing me off more than usual. Really? And I thought it was the baby, but it might be quarantine. Might be quarantine and the baby. I'm sure it's everything. Yeah. But I'm sure like, I'm sure it's just like, what do you even say?

anymore you've talked about everything like what is there today he goes to me you guys honestly he went to work and we're on the phone he's like do you miss me which used to be a cute thing that I used to do every five minutes and I was like no like I didn't even try to be cute anymore you don't I mean like I used to do that when we were both going to work every day and like wouldn't see each other for a six hour stretch I used to be like do you miss me like in the morning like no like he tried to be cute with me when i hadn't seen him in an hour was like 10 a m i was like thank god i have the house to myself and he's like dude i was like like literally work in another state and i'll be fine like literally give me a minute you're you're eating a slab of cookie

dough while taking a shit you're like i've never missed you less this is actually the most happy i've ever been yeah no it is it is wild i'm sure everyone is feeling it. And it's so funny because I brought you on to talk about The Bachelor because Let's do it. Jared does his live screams every week where he screams where he screams about The Bachelor. I do recaps of the episodes like seven days after they air where everyone's already watched them.

Jared's are more timely. If you're looking for something like that, he does them. I was invited on a podcast. Oh my God. Jared, I have to tell you. Oh, my God. Please. Everyone listen.

What happened? Stop everything. My armpits are swimming. So first of all, back to like you wanting to be Justin Bieber of YouTube and have an usher, find your special. Yes. That can happen. And let me put a little bit of hope into the world. Today's world is so crazy and so different than it's ever been.

And especially with social media, which we've never had. You can like literally DM Beyonce, right? Like will it be Beyonce answering you? Maybe not. but like you could right you can get connected to people you never thought you'd be connected to before you could have j z's manager's wife follow you on instagram and say i see you thinking but wait for me to finish my story no no no i'm listening i'm listening you could have jz manager's wife follow you on instagram and say jared's so funny oh my god i mean the jz of comedians let's say

whatever and then j z knows dave chappelle and d you got what i'm saying like it's just such a okay so you know we're connected to a lot of people in reality stars and they're nice and amazing whatever but when i get like dms from like actual celebrities i die okay oh it's a freak out moment it's a freak out moment for me especially because i've been married for so long so i don't get the excitement of like dm like i don't get the excitement of like new text message you up like i so my excitement moment is when a celebrity DMs me.

I would love that your husband would be listening and he hears do you miss me and you're like fuck no you know what gets me wet a celebrity I don't get those DMs celebrity DMs I've been waiting on a DM slide no but it's not even from men

I have a 93 women present women following okay no guys are hitting up my DMs but like someone do please make a girl feel a little bit sexy Yeah. So, yeah. So my wet moment is. Uh-oh.

What happened? Alexa heard me. She heard that, the wet moment. She was like, you go, girl. You go, girl. I agree. I get a message from Sophie, motherfucking Turner. Okay.

Whoa. Asking. I need to read it to you guys because you all need to, if you watch Game of Thrones, you know she's huge she's a huge and she's also the coolest person so like i didn't even watch game of thrones but i just love her as a celebrity she has cool celebrity moments which isn't she the one that was chugging the beer at the game yes oh my god yeah it wasn't even beer was red wine which is like so hardcore because who can chug red wine that was one of those videos that like as a guy

like listen I'm not proud of the things that live inside me as a man all the time but that was a moment her chugging the wine at the game I'm going I would have stiff armed my girlfriend to get to her like I like I like it was an out of body

like that is hot and she did and she did another cool thing everyone was doing that challenge one of those ice bucket things and she was like she put up some funny video and she was like stop with like she's really a vibe she always says and that's the motherfuckin te and she has like a brother's whatever she's awesome she's married to jo jonas kind of rando but they make it work also what i like about her is she doesn't show her baby because she's a baby she doesn't

emoji the baby like jiji haddeed she just doesn't show the baby which i'm i'm deal with that vibe like don't show the baby at all but don't emoji them so jiji haddeed does emoji the baby Gigi Hadita's like, here's the toe nail, you know? See, that's a thing where it's like, I, you know, the answer to all your questions is usually money. And it's like Sophie Turner being married to a Jonas, like they have so much money that they're out of the baby on my Instagram game. Like, you know, like there's nothing to be gained.

You would have to be just a psycho to be like, I gotta get this baby in here for the brand. Like, no, you are a Jonas. Like, you're done. It's over. You have private plane money for life. And you could have a private plane waiting for you on the driveway just to pick you up to take you to the fucking supermarket. So when I hear that Gigi Hadeed is putting her baby on Instagram, I'm like, oh, come on.

Hadid's, you have more money than God. But I wouldn't mind. Like, I'd be down to see the baby. But she won't. She accidentally put up a photo of Yolanda where there was a frame, picture frame of the baby in the corner. and she took it down because God forbid we see the holy baby

so that annoys me Sophie Turner is like no baby on here no baby toes no baby fingers no baby anything anyway she's about yeah I'm into that

I understand that vibe completely because it's like it is this weird thing where it's like who do you think you are both sides you know you're like who do you think you are

hiding your baby from us oh the baby got on here what do you think you are that I even care about your fucking baby like it's so so it's the exact how we decide to judge it that's that's another thing on instagram when people tell you like you know you're so like yeah i'm judgmental that's why you came here to hear my exact judgments of things anyway so okay first of all see sophy turners following me die right but then i like get a dm from sophy turner she says to me it's about the bachelor

so to think that sophy turner watch my stories of me being like Oh my God, the girls are like so disgusting. Like, I would hate me. I would be like, who is this? Ow, like my, I don't get why people like me sometimes. And definitely Sophie Turner, I'm like, I'm so embarrassed. She even saw my stupid Bachelor recap. Anyway, she said, hi, queen.

Oh, God. Yeah. This is it. This is my change panties moment. Yeah, you were wet at Q. You were like, high quack. Uh-huh. She said, hi queen.

I've only ever seen one season and it sucked. And I respect your opinion like no other. Wow. She's coming to you as an expert. This is amazing. This is great. Which season should I watch which to start with? So obviously the pressure was on me, right?

Like, what do I tell her to what? Which season would you have told her to watch? I would have started with the seasons that social media became a thing. Like I think I think the show is totally different now with social media than it was without social media. Did you watch when they put the first like the Jason Mesnick season on on on on on greatest of all time? No, I didn't. They talked about his as being because I might have then Google did when I didn't know what to answer Sophie Turner. I was like best.

Best you're like she saw a scene. She saw a scene. She knows she's got like you like to me I would be saying. there like the minute I read it, I would think that like she started a stopwatch from how long it took me from scene until I answer. Oh my God. I sent it to my friend and she was like, and you left her on red? And I was like, you can't leave Sophie Turner on red. No. We all know elf cosmetics. Okay. But what I didn't know and what is blowing my mind is that It stands for eyes, lips, phase.

I am shook, but it makes complete sense. You guys know that I am a sucker for high-quality, premium makeup and skin care products that I can get at prices that won't break my bank account. And Elf is exactly that. They make amazing products for less than the price of a freaking latte, okay? Elf has new things to check out. out all the time. I'm just using their hyluronic moisturizer and they have amazing eye shadow. They also have this clear gel mascara for your lashes and for my brows. So I've been

using that every day on my eyelash tint and lift because I don't need more color. So that clear jelly gel mascara for my eyelashes and for my brows are what I need in my life right now. The moisturizer with hyloronic acid is absolutely amazing. You guys have to check out elf products because like I said, quality at a great price and they're offering 25% off of your elf purchase of $40 or more by going to elf cosmetics.com slash not skinny and use promo code not skinny to get this exclusive offer. It's actually they're telling me the best deal out there right now. You're not going to find it anywhere else. So, their prices are already so affordable.

And this is an extra 25% off of your elf purchase of $40 or more by going to elf cosmetics.com slash not skinny for 25% off your elf purchase. So this is so funny. So first of all, I wrote to her because I was like, listen, if a reality star will DM me, it's like, bitch, we are on the same level. You know it. I know it.

You're just on TV. also like the idea that like you know again we all think of ourselves and like what's the out like what's the dream scenario like Sophie Turner has actual like poll where she's like no this woman needs to be like on a show with me do it you know like she can make those things the reality TV person is as desperate as we are they're like answering you from an email that says publicist at you know real housewives and it's their fucking gmail yeah assistant assistant yeah they couldn't even buy the domain buy the fucking domain get them, pay for the mailbox. Oh my God, you kill me. So, so first of all, I wanted to give her the respect. So I said, hold on, I just died. Because, like, I need to. Love it, love it.

It was a good one, right? You got to, absolutely. I totally agree with it because you have to read, you have to give back, you have to volley back her queen. Yeah. She gave you queen. You have to volley back in kind with something equally as. Right, I can't be like, what, like, um, whatever, Nick Vile season.

Yeah. I have to make it known that, like, you are Sophie Turner. We both know it. Like, I die. This doesn't happen every day. This is a big deal for me. Thank you so much for even acknowledging me. I get that.

But then I said, which season did you watch that sucked? Because she said, she's only said one season and sucks. She said, oh, which is like my heart? She said, John Luca, is that his name? Good looking, but dull A.F. I don't think that's his name, L-O-L. So I go, one-pop. That's sad that I knew.

I said one, Pablo. And, okay, so this is what I told her. I said, Caitlin Bristow's season is a good one because, remember, she had sex, which was like a big deal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she's a cutie.

And also, that's again, back to the, like, social media. Like, Caitlin Bristow became a huge person out of this show. And she's like the, you know, a big podcast. That's a good one. Like, and I think you're, right with Nick Vial like leaning toward like Nick Vial is like if you think of like the Avengers that's like starting at the beginning of the Marvel universe like he's the beginning

of when this became fit T nation to me like Nick Vial is the patient zero I didn't I didn't actually say Nick Vial though I said Caitlin's season is good Ben Higgins is a classic and Jojo yeah yeah you love Jojo I love Jojo and also like Ben Higgins season like the women I think came off really well on that season. He was he's not I mean first of all he him today did you make fun of his book yet or no he has a book that looks like the cover looks like a murder mystery it's him is it designed like his tattoo what's his tattoo? Ben Higgins had the most shocking tattoo in bachelor history like he took off his shirt and all of a sudden like his whole back was an eagle you're like dude are you in a Harley Davidson motor gang what happened to you I thought you

You were like, Mr. Jesus. No, I think I, he's, I don't know, he, it's what, what's that saying? He's likable though. I do understand that, like people do love. Yeah, he's like a likable guy. Let's just finish my Sophie Turner. Please, please. Because everyone needs to know how she signed off and how I.

So what did you, give us your exact response. Oh. Or do you not want to get to, do you know. Of course I did. I said, hold on. I just died. Yeah. Love it.

Which she tapped a smiling, laughing thing. And then I said... Even better. She's even cooler now. She didn't heart it. She laughed. She's choosing reactions. This is huge.

Yeah. This is big. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. So then I said, which season? Did you watch that sucked? And she said, John Lucas is that his name.

Good looking but dull. I don't think that's his name, L. O'L. Italian. And I said Juan Pablo dead. I'm in the theme of dying, obviously. I said dead. And then I just said, Caitlin Bristow season is a good one. Ben Higgins is a classic and Jojo.

Um, so she said, yes, so dull. Okay, amazing. Thank you so much. I can't wait. Now everyone take a deep breath. Keep killing a queen. I'm a fan for life. Wow.

This is, she could be listening right now. This is crazy. This is great. Hi, Sophie. I love you. Oh, my God. Sophie, the special is on YouTube. YouTube.com slash Jared Freed.

Move off my celeb. I don't know. If she's interested, you keep Hannah Ann. You keep Hannah Ann, okay. If Sophie's looking, you know, I don't know. Maybe she needed something to binge. I don't know.

Okay. You're right. She obviously does need something to binge. Absolutely. Joe Jonas is, you know, not singing enough at home. She was like, I got to need another end of his hand. You guys, shocking to me. And also, Sophie, for listening, Jared does a live scream.

Here, see, okay. I mean, if I'm not annoying for her, then you're not annoying for her, you know? Well, I'm proud of you. I'm gonna let you have your moment. Thank you. If Sophie's listening right now, she needs to keep,

she needs to do this. She needs to send at least one reaction emoji to a story, an episode. Give me something. Like, give her something, but not like a lot, because we don't want to have to keep liking your reaction. Some people don't know when to stop.

Sophie, just one reaction in episode. No, but that's the thing. She's not even watching this. Well, she said she watched us see the, So, yeah, I don't know, you guys. Whatever it is. Don't, let's not question it. It's a moment to be reckoned with.

And listen, Jared, this season. So what do you think? What is your, people are like, now you're getting to The Bachelor? No, yeah, let's, what do we think. Yeah, it's like we have five more minutes, Jared. I have a lot. This is what we do. It's fine.

We, this is how you know we enjoy each other's company is that we don't get to the point. We don't get to the point. And then I, you know, and then with me, it's like I already see the podcast review being like, she said it was going to be a bad job. Like, that's how I live now. I like, see the thing. Don't. Again, that's the, that's the same person as where's their mask? No, they don't get it. They don't get it. So where's their mask? They're in their car with their family. I have a friend, though, that said something so true about podcast reviews. She said, but I feel like yours are all like really nice. Because I feel like, maybe got, like, girls can be a little bit more, but whatever.

No, I, mine's mostly female too. I get, I get negative, you know, it happens. But she, my friend said something so true. Hannah Burner said that. She said, the fact that people can, like, review your podcast is almost like they can review you as a person in public. Do you know what I mean? Like, they can just, like, write whatever they want on a public thing.

You know what I mean? Like, it doesn't have to be about the podcast. I could just be like, you suck. They could just hate you. It doesn't, you know, like it's just, I, no, you know, the editing's good. It's the person that I just don't enjoy. Yeah. Okay.

So this season, this season is boring to me. Like I had such I hopes. You know I used to hate Tyler C and Matt James. I've stopped hating. Well, I hated Matt James just because he was friends with Tyler. Sure. But then I saw him on quarantine crew and then I saw his interviews for becoming the bachelor.

And I was like, damn, he has a personality. He's hot. Let's do this. And then I was like, and then this whole season, I'm like, where is his personality? Like, where is he coming through at all? It seems as though, and I'm coming,

you know, more and more, we're meeting him along the way. Like, we don't know him from anything because we never got to see him on another season. So we really have nothing like, we've been learning at the same time as everyone else. So it's becoming quite clear that he is the, high energy guy

who doesn't really understand the vibe of the room. He is the vibe. Like he is, he sits at the, he's like, we're going jet skiing,

we're going on a horse, we're going ATVing, cool. Like he, at no point in this show, it doesn't see, at no point doesn't seem like he's actually thought

of what a relationship could be. He, like it just feels like he's like, like her, like her. And it feels like that's kind of, of like the idea that he didn't realize

it was only to last episode that I realized this because there was all the drama in the house it took a woman Katie going to him and going hey we all hate each other can you like tell people to stop being mean to each other it took that

much for him to even see the vibe then he does that date last night where he's like he's doing the tantric yoga thing with Serena P and she's like I'm very uncomfortable and he's like no just wrap your legs around me like he doesn't even care like he doesn't have any awareness for anyone that's not just like jumping along for their big ATV date and it's like and then kit who I I don't like the kit left like I think that's like kind of like an annoying

thing that people do when they get far along and then they know they're going to lose so they just leave on their own so they get the wrong moment do you think that's what it was do you think that's what it was. Absolutely, but the more I think about it, the more I think Kitt's like a New Yorker. She's like this like city girl. She looked at him and she goes, my timeline is I want

to travel, I want to finish school, baby at 25 and I think she saw the look on his face like he had never heard the word timeline in his entire life and she was like, oh, this guy's not getting married. This guy's not going to be in a serious relationship and she bailed. So I think he like

I think that like the more I with Matt James. It's just like the fun guy who does all the stuff in the gym class. Like that like will part the guy who's like will be like who can we can anybody you know do can anybody show ever show them how to play

dodge ball? He'd jump up and be like I'll do it. I got it. Here's what you do. Like he'd be that guy. Yeah when the when when the ATV thing I remember thinking like him being like her being like I feel so safe. I'm like he doesn't look safe. No like he's not like he's not like he's

He's not, like, I don't think he's, he's not safely driving it. Like, he literally toppled them over. He was bounding from hill to hill ahead of her. Like, I would be behind him being like, hey, um, can you slow down? Like, I thought we were going to, like, talk while on the DA TVs. Like, like, yeah, it just doesn't, like, and this isn't the same is a bad guy. You're so right. You're so right, Jared, because as much as you do, like the screams, you're making such a good point in that and think about.

there was actually nothing about him and it could be that okay Tyler prepped him to say the word journey a lot right he did so he knows to say that which someone told me someone told me that they used the word journey instead of like show

okay so that makes sense right so it's like they're not just using the word journey it's like you can't say shows to just say journey every time we're going to say show and that makes sense because then it's like I came on this journey you know um because they can't say show and so he got that down to say that but and then he is trying to be like the mediator of like oh you're fighting okay so what are you saying okay I got it okay what are you saying okay I got it but it's like yeah but it's also you have a responsibility

and this is I just did a podcast with a reality TV person and they said like as much as we all want to think reality TV is just reality TV you have a job to make good TV also like remember Colton was so proud of his season and he's like best rating blah blah it's like because okay we don't want you to like front or like not be who you are but it's like you can't be the boringest dude ever and like you said just enjoy basketball playing in ATVs like you have to bring bring something well there's no more boring storyline than guy who's just maybe will fuck you know like the real storyline

is I'm in love and I don't think Matt James is getting to love like I think he's like he says his longest relationship is four months you which is fine but he has to realize that he's already on his longest

relationship right now like he doesn't see that like meeting the parents is you're now in a 10 month or dude like even though it's on show say what you want about the show but hey these women are here for a plan what are we going to do are you going to be moving to 10 months with me or are you going to be dumping me what's going to happen i need to know and it doesn't matter how old or young someone a woman is on the show they're looking

for like like and i saw it with kit where she's like i'm just looking to see like where you see someone fitting into this and he was like fitting in i'm doing my boys trip after this and it's like oh dude and it's like and Tyler you bringing up Tyler Cameron that's the perfect example because Tyler the thing that happened to Tyler is he was put in a position that he never upset the audience he never upset the audience he was the one that got dumped he was the hot dude ready to settle down who Hannaby didn't want that she made the mistake Tyler C hit the fucking lottery and he looked at Matt James and he's probably like yeah just be the best gentleman ever never admit that you're not maybe

never say you're going to marry someone but never say you're not going to marry someone. Never make any opinion known to anybody. And now the women on this season are sitting there being like, they're running around like with chickens with their heads cut off because they have no vibe on who he

likes at all. Did you see when he, when he sent home Abigail, they were like I thought you was in the lead. Like they had no idea. Oh my God. That is such a true line. They are running like chickens with their heads cut off because my sister was saying this to me, but she doesn't put things as good as you do. But she was saying the same thing. She's like, do you think he's into anyone? But

you're saying it so perfectly. They don't even know because he doesn't give off any fucking vibe. He's falling for everybody and he's falling for nobody at the same time. He gives off no vibe. Oh my God. These and you can see that they're like, listen, I, and the women this season haven't look great. Like, I don't mean like physically. I mean like just like generally like the vibe has been bad. The bullying has been bad. The anger. But I think that has to do with, you know, generally women like men love men in relationships. Love wasting time. Love hanging out. Love not living by a clock. Love living, liking you on a spectrum. Women on the other hand, and we get this on the podcast a lot. You've been a guest on the podcast. When women,

right into the show. It is, does he like me or does he not? It's either dump me and poor shit of my head so that everyone knows I've been dumped or hold me up like I'm Queen Elizabeth. Like, it has to be one or the other. And right now, these women are getting like on a spectrum, which is making them go a little bit, you know, not so. The other thing they're getting is I have a theory that when the economy is bad, contestants are a little bit more desperate. So, like, they came on the show during a pandemic with no hope for the future. All of us are hopeless.

But they are on, like, they were like, I'm signing up for a reality TV show. They are thinking, I got to get something out of this show. If it's a following, if it's a boyfriend, it's got to be something. And a lot of them are saying, I haven't been on camera once. Like, they said, Giacenia is on the going, I've never. even been on a date and we're on like the last episode. So I think they're like getting to the end being like, I've never been on

camera. So I'm not even going to get a following. I came all the way out here to live with a bunch of asshole women. You know, like I think they're getting a little bit more you know, it's getting to them. It would get to me. It's getting to them. It's getting to them. It will get to me too. If I can exactly, if I came on the show, I'm in

that house. It's not even the adventure. It's not jumping out of planes. It's not seeing every city in Europe. It's being And seeing Matt and then they're like, and then that's why they, Justenia's like, and I think I'm falling in love with. Justena, you just met him. What's happening?

They're not even getting, yeah, they're not even getting delta points. They're getting nothing out of this. Like, and yeah, justania, like, are you, you're falling in love with you, like you, you don't, what's his middle name, justenia? Oh, you don't know. You don't know. I don't think that's important. You think they're going to get, I haven't done, I haven't done a numbers round up.

I usually really like to see a social media following. Even that Sarah Trot girl, I mean, remember her at the beginning, the ASL, the dad with the disease. And like she was on the path to be really likable, like really likable until we found out, you know, that she was, she came for the wrong reasons. Well, yeah, she's dating. She like put her relationship on pause with the machine.

No, with the DJ. I don't know who she was with. She was with a, a guy. And it's like, yeah I don't know like the only I think the only one that really came out of this with like a following that could end up turning is that girl Katie who Katie um you know talking about people DMing you like she's the only like listen it is hard to step out of the shit talking when it's happening around you and she's on camera stepping out of the shit talking so she acted in a way that we would all hope we would act so like but I think like what happens is on these seasons is like, they're not sure what the audience is going to get into. Like, I don't think, like, Victoria obviously came on the show thinking, I'll be the bad bitch and I'll get all these bad bitch call her daddy fans to be my fan.

And then everyone was like, ew, no, we're not in on it. You seem out of, you seem out there. And it's like it didn't happen for her. Now she's probably getting tons of hate. She probably gets a horrible DM every hour. Yeah. And it's like Katie came out of this and she was like, like you know she kind of lived as honestly as we would hope someone would live and it seems

like she might get something out of this but like I don't know like you know I don't know what Matt James goes from here like you know he's got a non-profit like good for him that does a lot of good like maybe he just goes back to that I don't know but I I don't know who he ends up with I don't even have a feel for Michelle seems like so you don't know the one I don't look at I don't look at them I I don't look at them either Jared someone fucking sent me at yeah i i blocked those people okay that's great you block them no no actually it was a follower of mind that because i had reality steve on the podcast i guess she thought that i followed him or his thing so she was like oh my god did you see and i was like nope didn't but good to know so

it no i'm just kidding um she has some good women but you're right in the sense that you have no idea who he's feeling all those women i mean it's just and you know what let's let's put that aside. Can we just say, like, I'm bored. Like, if it wasn't for, I'm watching it the day after to not have commercials on and I'm, you know, recapping it. So that's giving me more, you know, interactive thing. Things to do. But like Tyler Cameron being liked was never for his personality. Like, oh, he's so sweet. He's so funny. He's so energetic. He's so it was for like, we've talked about a bunch of times just the fact that he was hot and a gentleman. But it's different when he. you have to carry the show. Yeah. And I think like, especially when the Nima Cohen sees in the Lakinta, like when they're not traveling, it is you need someone with a real dynamic personality. You need someone that has opinions.

Like they should be doing like I've been like joking around recently about like nominating myself as the next host of The Bachelor. And like I treat it like it's an elected position. I'm like, as next host, I will make. sure that the bachelor pays for all the dates, only dates he can afford. So, like, I do think that they should have done some things like that. Like, I would want to see an interview with Matt James after he sends home Abigail. I want to see that interview.

Like, I want to see him have to explain. Put him in the position of every guy after he ends a relationship. Why? Why? I don't know. Why? We got to get an answer, dude. But usually, but that's the thing.

That's the question. it does feel a little bit like we're not getting from him what we would have gotten from a typical bachelor because he's not really explaining his decisions nor is he again trying to make good TV. Well, I don't think they ever explain it really well. I don't think he's like. You see in their confessional.

It's like, listen, I was just not vibing with Abigail. Like, explains a little bit behind the scenes. Like I just feel like he's not. And maybe, you know what I mean? maybe because he's being boring it's falling on the girls to create this like drama well I think it's also I do think it's because he's not

the stakes aren't very high for him yeah he I think he's looking for someone to date for a few months yeah like I don't think he's thinking of like the the engagement I don't think he's thinking of like who's gonna be forever like I it just when he talked to kit and he was he He reacted to the word timeline like it was like legitimately like German. Like it just, he had no idea.

No idea. A timeline? Wait, you, wait. So what do you mean? And it's like, dude, like I, and I think when you're, again, for Colton, it did feel like he was like busting his butt to get in a relationship and like get to the next spot in life. And maybe that's why, you know, ratings go up. for that, but I, I, or why people are more interested or why it's more, but also the

traveling. I, I can't put it all on him. I think you're, you're, you're really, it's so true what you're saying. He's, it's also not believable and now from the beginning and especially because he's not from the franchise. So it's like, it's not like he's been looking for love for five seasons. Yeah. You know, it's like, oh, no, he's, Tyler's he's best friend. He could probably get with whatever girl he wants. So they probably have guy in with all these girls and he's becoming the bachelor so it's a different different situation but um yeah that's why that's why you know i'm happy they're doing seniors bachelor they're doing old or the seniors one which i like think is perfect but they should have always had these people be older like i think like the idea that like you know

matt james like just like you said he went on all the trips he's on the guy trips yeah those were very much post college i got a few bucks in my pocket trips like we're gonna stay in a hotel room where I'm splitting a room and there's a pillow between us while we sleep in the same bed. It didn't look like a guy who was like exhausted from it and was like, ah, I got my career. I got my friends. I just need my lady. And it didn't feel like that. It's like I just moved out of the Upper West Side apartment where Tyler and I were crashing

on a bunk bed and now we're getting an influencer deal at an apartment building that we have to tag in the geo tag. Jared, I love you. Thank you for coming on for the gazillions time because it's the. most fun when you do. I love coming on and you were great on my show too and it's always a blast to see you and thank you so much. This is

we gotta keep, always keep doing it. Always keep doing it. And no, you think your work here is done. Everyone follow Jared. Oh my God, you just put up something funny. They called you Jared friend somewhere. Oh my God. It was so the Ed

Bennett and Dale Moss came to my comedy show the other night. How'd that happen? they Ed and Bennett have become fans from the live screen yeah because I spent the season making fun of both of them a lot so I actually like them a lot I think they're really nice and they like were in on the joke a little bit which is so nice and like always fun yeah so then they they decided to surprise me at my show in Tampa and legitimately had no idea all of a sudden I get on stage three like Avengers are sitting in the front they're huge they're like gorgeous

Dude. Ed is huge. Ed is so jack. Go look at the picture of him. His his um, bicept has legitimately the biggest vein through it I've ever seen. And Bennett is huge. They're all there. And Dale is there. And like, I came on stage and I was like, I can't believe this is happening. And they're laughing, whatever. Bennett, I made these shirts that say mumsy, but it looks like Harvard. And because I was, every time he come on string, I'd be like, but mom. he said, like I would give him a voice. So he's holding up the shirt. He, they, I like start making fun of them.

But like, again, some of the people in the audience know that I do the bachelor thing. Right. Some of the people are like brought by someone. Like you only have five minutes to give them their moment. And then it's like we have to move on. I have to do my my show. Yeah. So I move on from it.

They're taking selfies, whatever. And there was one point where like, you know, they're discussing the tab. And I was like, Dale, put it on Claire's. card she'll never see it like everyone's like oh you know eight took we're laughing it was a lot of fun and they were so nice like it was like legitimately

like I was my heart was warmed by these guys who are you most attracted to from the three of them I'd say they're all very attractive I mean Dale is you you know why she was like yeah you like day one you can tell like

that guy is did you see that they were seen together in Florida that was right after my show. This is, I was there. Listen, I'm, you know, I'm Jared. I'm no, you know, my fans are no Sophie Turner, but I'm Jared Friend as they reported in the news. So.

You guys follow Jared Freed everywhere. Listen to his podcast. The J-Train. J-Train podcast and Y-Train podcast. And you-U-Up podcasts. And most importantly, and why he came on here and blessed us with his, with his time is,

stand-up show March. March 2nd. It's going to be on YouTube. It's called socially distanced, of course. And it's going to be an extension of what we talked about here at the beginning with. Absolutely. And go enjoy that. Thank you so much. Jared, thank you. Thank you guys so much for listening to this episode of Not Skinny but Not Fat. Follow me on Instagram at Not Skinny but Not Fat. Subscribe to the podcast. We don't miss any episodes. Rate the podcast that you love so much on Apple Podcasts and write a little review. If you tell me you did, I'll give you a big virtual smoocharoo. Thank you guys so much for listening and I'll see you next Tuesday.