Not Skinny But Not Fat - DANIELLE OLIVERA ON LINDSAY/CARL, WINTER HOUSE HOOKUP & HER NEW MAN

Episode Date: December 26, 2023

Danielle is in the studio talking all about the Houses! We dive into her fling with Alex, her new relationship with a Bravolebrity, how she felt after the Lindsay and Carl breakup, where all the girls stand now, and how being a part time House Mate is actually the best gig!Produced by Dear MediaThis episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct, or indirect financial interest in products, or services referred to in this episode.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a dear media production. It's time to get real about sex. I'm your host, Carter Cruz, ex-porn star, DJ, and professional party girl. And this is ex-Virgin, the podcast. Get ready for wild conversations with porn stars, king enthusiasts, and listeners. Basically, anyone who isn't afraid to bear it all. There are no limits. This show is all about owning your sexuality and taking it there.

So have an open mind and get real. ready to join the madness. Listen to a new episode of X-Version every Friday, wherever you get your podcasts. This is Amanda Hirsch from the Not Skinny but Not Fat podcast. You might know me from Not Skinny Bonifut on Instagram where I spend my time talking about reality TV, celebrities, everything happening, and pop culture. I also talk to some of our favorite celebs and reality TV stars. We talk about what's going on. Tune in every Tuesday and just feel like, you're talking and show with your best friends in your living room. Danielle is here.

Danielle a la Summer House, all the Winter House, a la headlines of recent. I just gave me, I just got the sweats. Just like... No, okay, that's not the vibe. I mean, the headlines are pretty cute. No, they're cute. They're cute.

They're not drama. No. We talked, was it in the summer? Yes. I really wanted you to come on when the Lindsay stuff was going on. Yeah. We almost did it. What ended up happening? I don't know. You recently got, you got cold feet. No, I didn't get cold feet. I would never do that like not to you. Yeah. I am just like figuring out how to organize all of my lives. And I think it was just too much. So now I think I'm better at it. Yeah. Adalting. Like I'm getting there. Yeah. I'm turning 35. this month. So I think we're 88. I saw that. We're Sazis. Are we? You're 88, but like a younger 88, right?

Yeah. Because you're just turning 35 now. Yeah. Because, oh, you're a December baby. Okay. December 22nd. It's really, you know. Just so you know and remember.

Just so everyone knows. Crazy time. Crazy time since the summer for you. Yes. Usually you didn't have. I mean, you've been on Summerhouse since the second season. Yep. And usually you like skated by, right?

Yeah. Pretty much. Did you like that? aspect of it were you hoping to like be more in the prime of things or i liked it you liked it really really liked it because i was so focused on my finance job that i just needed to make sure i was still employed over there and so to be someone who's a main really wasn't something i was going after i was just like oh this is great like i get to like be with my best a little bit it was it was it was more of like that's what my focus was like i wasn't putting

myself out there. Definitely not in this way. I wasn't trying to like chat about. You weren't trying. No. I really wasn't. I wasn't even doing Instagram that well or at all. It's funny. Just like part of the job. Because there is a difference then between trying and not trying. Like there is organicness to things obviously. Like if you're having drama, if whatever. But there's also intention. Yeah. And like people weren't really getting to know me at all. Yeah. And so I was just like. For seasons. I mean two, three, four, five, six. That's wild. That's wild. Looking back at it now. I know. People were just like, how is she still on the show? And I'm like, I don't know either, but I kind of like that I've wrote this out. So did you care?

Because I remember chatter like that, like, what is she adding to the show or like she's not showing her, you know, or whatever. Did you care? Were you like, I don't like. See, I give 110% when I'm there. Yeah. When we're filming. But it's just what makes the edit, makes the edit, what doesn't, doesn't.

Yeah. And I wasn't trying to put myself out there outside of that. Yeah. So it wasn't. people weren't getting to know me, but I do contribute a ton. Like, I'm real, number one. I'm not trying to be an actor or, you know, be in that world so much. So, like, you get what you get and there's like you weren't trying to be an influencer even. Right. Like, and that's my life. Like, that sharehouse going to the Hamptons, work hard, play hard. That is what I do, no matter what,

whether it's being filmed or not, I'm going to be out there. Yeah. So, tell you. Tell me about that going way, way, way, way back. You come on season two. You're a, you know, you're working in finance. You come on as Carl's ex at that point. Mm-hmm. That was a surprise to him, too. Oh, because you weren't really exes?

Well, no, we were exes, but he didn't know that I was joining the show at the time until I walked into the room at our first meeting. And he was just like, what is happening? How long did you date before coming on the show? It was three months, but like back then, New York three months was basically three years. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So did they, so it was all like, hey, we know you dated Carl, like, want to come on the show and kind of freak him out? No, it was part of just the conversation. I was like, oh, yeah, I know Kyle from being out there. Like, I met Kyle before too in Montau. And we would party together. And then Carl, Carl, I met in Montau as well, but we just happened to date. So I think that they were just like, how were you going out to Montauk? You were like 20. Where were you staying?

In sharehouses. Oh, like with other, you were just renting houses. My first sharehouse, I think we had a roster of like 30 people. Oh, wow. Wow. Oh, yeah. I was sleeping on air mattresses. No, I know. You could sleep anywhere. You had a season where you were, what's it called, like a part-timer. How did that affect the ego? No, I, it was a mutual decision. Oh, really? Okay. Because I was traveling for work. I was at Capital One at the time. And my team was in Richmond, Virginia. So I would spend two weeks in New York and two weeks in Richmond. I remember you like, Danielle's getting on this train. She's coming in. So imagine like instead of the train ride hustle, a plane. And I was like, I can't do this. It would be too much. That's wild that you were even doing that at all. Yeah. Like finance life and going to this house. It's like two different people. Two sides of the brain too. Yeah. And it was hard because I would have to context switch and give a shit about things that I like, okay, what are we talking about at this dinner table and why do I care? All I'm thinking about is like problem solving something at work because I'm like hot off like a Friday at work. Any of that looking back? No. Like being so into work and and no. It's like part of who I am. Yeah. Part of my identity. Yeah. No, I remember that so well. But you've changed a little bit. Like you're still working on. You're working on your own app now. How's that going? It's going great. But I realize that there's like there's beauty in putting yourself out there, not just filming. Like making people get to know you in social media and podcasts and just like, you know, interviews. I didn't I didn't realize it until I started doing it like oh okay I can tell my side of the story when we're not filming yeah yeah how did you make that switch didn't like such a late bloomer in so many ways did anybody sit you down was it a you thing like how did it come to be like my castmates like do it yeah and they were doing it for years I know but like I was just like I just didn't see it again I'm just like the naivity of being someone who put my other career first and then I was just like I was just like I'm just like the naivity of being someone who put my other career first.

It wasn't important to you. Not as important. Not as important to you. And there was a switch. Yeah. So the switch came, you're saying, from seeing other people, but was it also, was it anything else? Also, like, wanting to get my side of things out there.

Because once I started, can I curse a little bit or no? Away. Okay. So away. Once I started giving a shit. Yeah. I was just like, oh my God. I didn't really mean that or I can't believe that came out that way.

And what did that person say? Yeah. I want to talk about that. So I was like, okay, let me also lean in the way my castmates have. And also they were doing it and talking about me. And I was like, oh, hell no. Yeah. I want to talk to. Yeah. So first of all, welcome. Welcome to this life. This other side of reality TV. But I do feel like it's such an interesting journey because it's so many years. It was a conscious decision for you to stay, enjoy it, get the like fruit of it, but also have the other side of your life, like, it really worked that way for quite a while. And then things shifted a little bit, and you're leaning in. Yeah. You're leaning in. I am. That's, I think, what it is. You're in your

leaning in. Cheryl, Sanber. I'm Cheryl. And also, I mean, do you think there's a change because you're now, like, not working for, you're working for yourself? Yeah. So I couldn't say where I worked on TV or in the press at all, because if I wanted to keep my job in corporate America, that part had to be away. Yeah. And so I was there for three and a half years also filming on top of that. Yeah. Did anybody at work know, like bosses and stuff?

Yeah. Were they, did they watch you? Were you concerned? They're like, why didn't you tell us you were an actress? I'm like, because I'm not. And you also didn't grow, like a lot of these reality TV stars grow up wanting to be in the entertainment industry, maybe settling for reality TV or seeing that as an avenue. Did you have dreams of like being on stages and not at all?

all. No. Still to this day, I think like this format is where I feel like my, my most at home because I love talking. I would love, I mean, I would love to do a podcast, but it would probably be in technology, not in like pop culture. But I do love it. I just like don't, I don't really like the spotlight that much. That much. Like I don't wake up and like that's the first, I'm a Capricorn. So like I'd rather be behind the scenes, just hustling and grinding and making money, but not necessarily in front of people's faces doing it. I know. But yeah, you are in front of people's faces. So let's talk about this season of Winterhouse first, firstly. First of all, you go into it. Is this your first time being, filming without Lindsay? Or without like,

you know what? Yeah. Yeah. I think, I think that's like, did that feel like you could, you're kind of flying on your own that give you any sort of power? Yes. And no. but because Kyle was still there, house dad was still there. You know what I mean? So there's comfort in having Kyle there. But when it comes to Lindsay, we had, we're still repairing our best friendship, right? So it was one of those things where I think that I was comfortable doing it on my own because we had been kind of broken up for a little bit. Right. And I know we're still repairing. Yeah. So I was, I was okay with it. And I think that I've finally hit my stride when it comes to being comfortable in that environment

in filming. Yeah. It only took like five seasons, but I got it now. Kyle's really good to you too, I've noticed. Yeah. Like he doesn't turn on you. There was like one... He doesn't back me up as much as I would love. Yeah. But he doesn't, he knows who I am at my core. He doesn't talk shit, I feel like. There was one time

where maybe, yeah, maybe last season he didn't. But I just felt there was there were moments of season where he did feel like kind of... Big brother. But, but like, yeah. like he's not going to be like Danielle's a mess. You know, I feel like he's not going to turn on you in that way. Because we get each other at like a lot of levels. Yeah. The career sense and then like the partying sense. Like wanting to blow off steam. Yeah. We both do that. And that's like our that's our way to kind of get through all of the craziness of our lives. Can you still drink like you used to? It seems like you can, which is wild. I yeah. Like no hangovers like. You know,

I've learned certain tools and tricks. Most of. of the time you just have to just get one healer to get you back to normal and then you're good for the rest of the rest of the rest of the rest of the stop that's a for real thing yeah you're just level set and you're fine for the rest of the day stop damn and do you have a high tolerance i think what i'm good at is pacing myself really well like i don't have this need to get blackout drunk right it sometimes

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You came into Winterhouse. How long before you started filming did you and Robert break up? So we broke up. Oh my gosh. It's definitely a year now. We broke up right before Thanksgiving, so it would have been like three months, pretty much. Did it feel super fresh? Well, yeah, because I had just been in Aspen where Robert was working and, like, had to face a lot of that. Why were you there? Vacation? Yeah, because, yeah, I can't stop doing sharehouses, I guess. Oh, oh, you were just? Wait, I was. Aspen was.

Yeah, I was there for, well, Aspen, I did a sharehouse with my other friends for three weeks. Oh, not filmed. Not filmed. Oh, okay. So you weren't asked him with friends. So you knew you would run into him that he works there. Did you want to run into him? Yes and no.

It was like a very big closure moment and, you know, had heard that he was seeing someone else who I had suspected during the breakup. So that was like, you know. What, you think he cheated? I think that there was an emotional connection with someone that he was working with that was part of it. Oh, okay. So that's why I was interested when Amanda said on Winterhouse, like, that he burned you. I was like, I felt like the audience didn't exactly know what that meant at that time. Yeah, that'll, I think more of that will come out in Summerhouse, the upcoming season.

In the 28, we'll know what happened. Because, like, the girls were like a good girl group now. Yeah. Because I think everything that had that happened last Summer House had to happen, like, a lot of the friendship breakups and the mess and like the reunion and like. Like people were going after each other, but I think all of that needed to happen for us to be like a wonderful girl group moving forward. And so a lot of, and a lot of them were there for me when the breakup happened. And Lindsay wasn't because you weren't talking then. No. So then over the summer, we just kind of all really loved each other. And so I was open about what had happened with Robert. So a lot of that will come out. Because you really didn't open up to the girls before. Before, no. you were so guarded with them because you know it was like two sides like there was like team Lindsay and I was on that side yeah just like everyone knew that there was a divide yeah and I feel like we needed to have everything kind of break down and crumble for it to kind of like come back

together again which is I feel like you needed it yeah probably no because I mean in hindsight yes I'm thinking like who did it affect the most in a good way yeah it sucked it sucked at the time But I'm glad that we're at, like, this place where, like, now the girls and Lindsay and myself were kind of friends. Well, they still don't like Lindsay, though. They do. Yeah, better. Yes. Oh, because, like, everything that happened with Carl, they feel for her.

Also, I feel like in the reunion, like, what was said needed to be said finally. You know, like, they finally got some stuff out there, especially Paige and Lindsay. And it was like, there was always some, like, weird unspoken. intention. Amanda always had something against Lindsay. And so I feel like finally we're kind of getting there. Okay. Yeah. Okay. I'm hopeful. Yeah. Okay. You're optimistic. Okay. So you're saying we're going to find out more about the robber breakup as we go. Well, I say I talked to the girls a lot about it over summer. And so meaning you're still, oh, over summer. I know. It's like you would have broken up in Thanksgiving. Mm-hmm. The previous. And so.

where I wasn't so comfortable talking about it when we were filming Winterhouse. Oh, okay. So more time had passed. Yeah. But you still weren't over it. Well, then they just like, I think they either like,

maybe they hard launched on Instagram or something. I don't know. Oh, him and his, he's dating that girl now. Yeah. Oh, wow. Okay.

Great. Yeah. Are you feeling okay about it? Yeah. Yeah. He was a good guy, though, all in all. Yeah. Yeah.

Smile. Yeah. I don't know how to wink. Yeah. No. I mean, I didn't notice a lot of things when you were dating maybe. Yeah. And I feel like the way it went down and the end, like it was just, you know, when someone breaks up with you and it's like, okay, you did this, this, this and this.

And then it comes out that, oh, no, you just wanted to date someone else. Like, why did you have to make me feel bad in the process? But he broke up with you and made you feel like you did things? Yeah, like, it's not a bad, it's not, I was like, well, it seems like you're really into this girl. Yeah, you're working with. And he's like, that's not it. I think, I think it's called gaslighting. Yeah, I just hate the fucking buzzword. I hate it. I'm so over the buzzwords. Me too. I hate, that's why I'm asking. But that's why I'm asking, because I'm like, wait, but I think this one actually means it. Like, unlike so many other times. I'm glad you said it. This one actually means it. Is he a narcissist? No, I'm just kidding. Maybe. Who knows. Okay. So Winterhouse. You get to Winterhouse.

even though you just dealt with this breakup, you're in the mood, you're in the mood. Yeah. You're in a lot of, you're in a lot of moods. I just, like, wanted to get after it and like get my mojo. Like the D. Yeah. The D. Yes.

Which we've never seen you like this before. No. Ever. No, because like I always want the D, but like I was more subtle about it. So subtle. I think that that was way less subtle about it. Yeah, you were less subtle. So let's talk about it.

You get there. First impression of Alex wasn't great. No. It wasn't because he was just like a typical. typical guy was just like kind of flirting with everyone and I was just like who is this guy that's just like giving everyone compliments you like did you like the ponytail I like long hair I do too yeah I'll tell you what with Alex I remember seeing the first episode now was like ick ooh like oh it like I went back and forth like I was like I get it wait that's gross no but it's hot and like you guys I'm sorry I said it on my Instagram I was like it's hot like you had hot makeouts yeah There looked to be a lot of chemistry. It was a good, hot coupling. Yeah.

That's what was on my mind. I want a vacation, bling, and that's, like, you know, that's all I want. And you didn't care, it seemed like at the beginning, that, like you said, he was flirting with everyone. He was flirting heavily with Jordan. Yeah. You even in the bathtub, in the bath, hot tub, said to him, after making out and having a ses, you should talk to Jordan.

Yeah. What was that? Because, like, I knew that he was interested in. And I was just like, I did want the makeout, but I was like, at that point, you didn't care, I feel like. No. But then once we started having sex, I started, I started like, okay, you can't keep flirting with someone else under the same roof. Yeah. When we're having sex all the time. Which, by the way, makes sense to me. It makes sense to me too. It makes a lot of sense. I think in Alex's mind, it didn't make as much sense. Yeah. Because he was like, well, you still told me, like, remember that time that you told me that I could still? And I'm like, that was, that was days ago. And like. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's years in this house. Yeah. Did you get the vibe throughout that he was into you? Alex?

Yeah. Yeah, of course. I mean, the thing is, the foundation was friendship. Yeah. Like, to this day, it's friendship. So when a lot of this stuff started happening, it was more, like, disrespect of our friendship. Like, don't, why are you playing me? Yeah.

Why are you making me out to be this fool? Like, I thought we were cool. I thought we were, like, I was helping him, like, of course, you don't see. Helping him through some anxiety that was going on. There were stuff going on back home. He had another girl. I didn't know about back home. I was like helping him through a lot of this stuff.

And then behind my back, you're kind of saying like, not so great things. So I'm just like, that's interesting. But it did bother you in general when you saw him and Jordan, like, have their own thing. Yeah. Yeah. Because I was like that, that to me, like you, there's an intuition there. Yeah. It didn't smell right.

You felt like he was still trying to get in her vans. Yeah. And it seemed like it was being reciprocated. Yeah. Like all of a sudden maybe, and this is a little big girl nature sometimes. Oh, at first I didn't like him, but there is a girl here that, you know, she's a great girl and she's into him. So maybe like it. No, that didn't cross my mind.

Oh, okay. Because Jordan and I are also friends. I don't know, Danielle. I don't know. We need to talk about that too because I felt like you thought you were friends, but she wasn't being so great to you. That's what I realized. And that's what made, like, my heart hurt. And I was just like, I don't understand what's going on.

You realized watching it? Watching it during. I'm like, what is happening? Why did you think? Were you friends before? Yeah. Oh, you knew each other before filming. Yeah.

Okay. So that's why I was just like, I don't, it doesn't feel right. Yeah. And I think that's where a lot of my, like, acting out or people are just like, you're so cringe. I'm just like, well, what would you do if like people who you thought were your friends are now all, like, being kind of shady? Yeah.

And you don't know how to how to vocalize it or you don't know how to put your finger on it. And everyone in the house is like, no, it's cool. Like, it's fine. I don't see anything, you know, that shouldn't be, you know, happening. And I was like, okay, maybe, okay, maybe it's me. And then I would drink a little bit. I'm like, I don't think it's me. Hmm.

I have this feeling. In the last episode that I watched that's out as of right now that we're recording, you had just had the conversation with Jordan at the fire pit, which, by the way, I want to go there. I want to order all the food that you guys are ordering. It just looks so good every time you guys order all the food. That's what I'm looking. That's what I'm watching on the show.

That's what I'm looking at? What are those chips? Yeah. What's that truffle? So you have this conversation. She seems very like, you're kind of. Okay, so like put yourself in my position too. This is a girlfriend who I went into the show with and I knew like we were both single.

We were both like ready to like get after it. And she started. becoming like more like distant in the whole house not just towards me and I was like okay maybe she needs to get like her like mojo going yeah you weren't just being like anti-feminist being like you need a dude in your life there was context to this yeah like I said it the wrong way in that moment I was like well that's not what I meant but the feeling behind that was just like okay maybe we should maybe I should pay more attention to you because maybe we should just go out together and take the town by storm yeah it it didn't land it did

And she tells Alex, he even says, I don't care who said it to you. It's not okay. And she seems like she wants to tell him that it's you. Yeah. So that felt a little like, does she want him to turn on you? Like, what's the vibe? I don't know. But it, I just know I didn't like it. You heard that. Because in that moment, it shows you getting mad and like hyping yourself up, doing your mirror talks. I do those. Do you do those sober too or just drunk? Oh, sober to? I did it this morning. Oh, really? Danielle, you got this. You got this. You can do this. You can do this. So did you hear him saying she's the worst or something? Yeah. Oh, you heard it. Yeah. I mean, it's a big house. Yeah. But it's not that big. Yeah. I mean, we don't get to see how mad you are. And he can tell by their body language what's going on. Yeah. I'm not an idiot. Why didn't she just took up with him then if she liked him so much? I don't think that I think they gravitated towards each other in a way that I don't really like, you know, I wish there were more boundaries. and like walls put up, but I think that there was like, it was a cute chemistry and she really liked it. But I don't think that she truly would have gone there. Yeah. So do you, do you think both of them should have? I don't know. I feel like this is therapy right now because I really don't know. Like think about it. Go back. Yeah. Do you think both of them should have respected you more at the end of the day? Yes. Okay. And that's what, that's what stings the most because I obviously act out and I didn't like the behavior and and you see that obviously but it's like I'm always the female's

always a crazy one like oh my god you're crazy like you're stage five cling I'm like that is not it like I'm not were you looking for something like did you at that point think Alex no the one for me 100% the guy that's telling you has no motivation doesn't want to work which that felt like so not you yeah it's not and you're like come to Brooklyn he's like don't have a job chill in And that isn't something you're looking for in a partner, I'm assuming. No. But I think that he's a wonderful, like, human. And he's my friend.

At the end of the day, both of them are my friends. And I wanted to keep that going. But I also didn't want to feel disrespected. Yeah. And that's what sucked. So you never thought about having anything serious with him. No. Why was he thinking that?

Because that's what I got from him. He was such a typical dude of like, that just reminds me of like high school, which is like, want a girl, get a girl. get less into her because I got it. Want a girl. She doesn't give me it. Like she doesn't put out, right? Let's talking like high school terms.

And I'm still into it. I'm still into the chase. That's what it kind of felt like. And it is that. And I come from a place of like I have a ton of guy friends. I know how to be platonic with a guy. And I think that he doesn't have many just girlfriends. So he didn't know like I'd, yeah.

So every girl obviously wants a romantic relationship, right? Like, no, that's not it. Yeah. And not at that time. Right. You didn't want that. But I did want. Yeah, you wanted like the closeness, yeah.

And was he good and like bed and stuff? Yeah. Yeah. He looks like he has it. I'm like, that's annoying. Like, he really does have the vibe. And then there's hair and then it's just, I don't know. Yeah.

It felt nice. Yeah. So I wanted to keep that part going. It was like annoyed of that I couldn't keep that part going. And then like, what's going on over there? Yeah. It was like, yeah. Yeah, you're like, why can you just be normal?

Just be this good thing going. We only have like five. days left. Like, can we just keep this moving? Come on. Yeah. Let's just be consistent here. But you couldn't really let it go when you heard what he said. I'm assuming. Because then you would be- Because then it just started feeling like shady boots and what's going on behind my back. Yeah. Oh, God, I hate it. So you don't, do you connect to the idea that maybe you weren't ready for like connecting with someone at all? Or like it's not, doesn't have anything to do with that? No. Okay. Yeah, no. Because I'm a very sex positive person. I could, I could remove the

emotion from sex. I know that's probably not a great thing to say. Yeah. But it was I wanted that mojo back. I wanted to feel that I still got it. Yeah. And so like the mission was accomplished. I just wanted to keep doing it until the end of the vacation. And once it was stripped away from me, I was just like, why? Yeah. Yeah. Because you couldn't really like, even though you're not super egotistical, you couldn't have your ego hurt in that way. We're like, okay, I'm having sex with you, not trying anything serious but don't you can't be like not under the same roof yeah under the same roof like you know if he went to a bar and brought something like that fine but like under the same roof with someone who's also my friend yeah just felt odd and you're still friends with both of them yes so seeing

i mean i was with jordan last night like the thing is it wasn't that deep and i'm never going to make it that deep my memories from that no matter what the edit is i had a great time yeah and the friendship were real. And so, like, that's what I choose to hold on to. You would feel silly to be stuck on me. Yeah, like, make a fool out of me all you want. I'll, like, keep you at an arm's length. But we can be cool. Like, I will, you just put them in different boxes. Yeah. So, watching confessionals, which you're used to because you've watched conventions for years. Like, like, I hated this. Yeah, this was a different. Because I know that we filmed them months after. So, like, do you really feel that way about me? Come on. Like, what really hurt you? I think red flag was said.

That's actually, that's so when you said that, I wrote that. I was like, Jordan with the goat, but not a scapegoat. I was just like. What scapegoat? Just like, we're both goats, but I'm not your scapegoat. It was just like, oh. Yeah, what were flags do you think he was talking about?

I don't know. Yeah. I mean, I'm sure I have some. Yeah. I'm not like, I'm a human being. I'm sure I have a few red flags here and there. But I certainly didn't think I was waving them that much. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't either. I think a lot of you were. thought it was a little shady that there was an episode where when Jordan was still into Corey, she literally cried to the house because Malia spit in his face. She thought it was a kiss. And she wanted to bone Corey, even though between Corey and Jordan, there was actually nothing going on. Right. Like he has a girl, even though he wasn't like being super clear about that. But I feel like we didn't really get to see even like that a big flirtation there.

And then you, she knows that you're uncomfortable with them being that close. And she talks about in interviews like, I don't get it. We flirt. That's what we do. Yet she was so upset about the Corey situation. Did you feel like there was like a double standard there? Are we doing buzzwords again? Double standard there?

Definitely. It's just like I'm a, I hate also saying girls girl too. I know. That's gross. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you for. You're a good friend and a good person.

Yeah. That's what I always go back to. Like, if you're a friend, there's boundaries that you put up. I think that's like your middle name. But like, we just say like, that's our relationship. We, we flirt. That's what we do. Yeah.

Like, that shouldn't be your relationship with that guy who has a situation going on with another person. That you are friends. That you care about. Regardless, like, don't do that. Yeah. It just seems odd behavior to me. And so now I'm on my high horse. But like, I just like, I wouldn't, I wouldn't do that.

Yeah. And I wouldn't justify it by saying we just have a flirty relationship. Yeah. Yeah. Nope, we can't believe it either. 2024 is literally here. Like how weird. I was just getting used to saying it's 2023. I just stopped writing down that it's 22.

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friend. It's like you're the Malika to the Chloe. You know, you are. I take pride in that, honestly, because that's, I love being a good friend to people. I know that it hurts me sometimes because then I get burned a little bit or people are just like, well, she's just blindly defending that person. Yeah. I don't do anything blindly. I just, I'm a ride or die. Yeah, you're a writer die. I'll do it knowing. Do you ever feel like you rode too hard though? Yeah. I think. that only because at certain points, I don't think that she was doing the same for me. Right. I didn't give her a lot of reason to.

Right. You weren't getting into shit. Right. Yeah. But at the same time, like, the question was like, would she then? I don't, like, I don't know. Hypothetically, you weren't sure that it would be the same. Yeah.

Do you regret, like, anything? Like, maybe the, the wine pouring with Sierra. Do you ever regret, like, times that you literally got into huge. fights at that time we know you weren't looking to like like you weren't doing this from any other intention then your pure loyalty wanting to defend Lindsay in that moment but also Lindsay has this attribute to her that I've talked to her when she has been in my podcast where she kind of shuts down in fights and all of a sudden she's not yelling and I don't know if that's her tactic to like Lindsay shut the fuck up so you don't say anything but then you would step in and be the

voice and get shit about something that you're not even involved in? I regret inserting myself so much in things that had nothing to do with me. Yeah. That's, and so I think that going into Winterhouse, I made it a point not to insert myself into things. And that's why I wasn't so vocal about Corey, so vocal about certain other things that I saw because I was just like, all right, learn your lesson. You do not have to, you know, fight other people's battles.

Yeah. And so I'm trying. No, that's good that it was like a learning thing for you. We all know what happened with Lindsay and Carl, like what the public knows now. One of the first things I thought after obviously the shock was like, is Danielle feeling a little vindicated, a little not happy that this happened to her friend, but a little like, told me so, I knew it. Like everyone thought it was crazy. Yeah, I hate the told you so thing. But I think it's more like, you know, this is what I want.

wanted to, this is exactly what I wanted to prevent. This is not the outcome that I wanted, but that was the flag that I was raising. Like, it seems like it's going in a direction where you guys need to sort some, like, really big things out before making this huge decision. So is that maybe what we didn't hear you say? Because I, you know what, as reasonable and, you know, intelligent as I am, sometimes things come out of my mouth the wrong way. Or maybe, were you saying, did you not want to throw them under the bus maybe like on summer house and say you guys have issues that I know about you know that kind of thing because we heard you saying going too fast and that as an audience member and by the way I was one of the people trying to understand you in that time like

but I go too fast too like yeah I moved in with Robert three months after we met right and what's going on with Joe like that's moving pretty quickly as well I I'm not a hypocrite like you know what I mean I just I know what it's like to go too fast and But I thought that we could have a conversation about it and be like, I know, like, I wish it would be like, you know, I know I'm going too fast and I want you to support it. Because then I would have been like, oh, that's, that's the lane that you want me in, then that's the one that I'm going to be in. But were you seeing stuff that concerned you aside from the pace? Because I think the audience members, we thought just the pace, then who cares? Yeah, but like that is, that's stuff that sometimes as best friends, like when we're filming, there's certain things that if I were to.

put it out, like, totally out there. I was in a lose-lose situation, in my opinion. Because, like, I couldn't say what really was going on because I felt like, oh, my God, they don't want a lot of things to be said. Right. And then at the same time, using words, like, too fast or, you know, why don't you talk about this or why don't you talk about that? That was also not great.

Yeah. So, like, it just sucked all around. And there was no way you were not going to express any sort of feelings towards it. Yeah. But then again, in my naivity, I really didn't think. think that he was going to pop the question that summer. I really didn't think so. And I even talked to Robert about it at the time. And I was just like, do you think, and he was like, that would be crazy. Like, there's no way. There's a way. There's a way. And you were really hurt, though, that

even though you had all these feelings towards a relationship, you weren't included because you felt like the third wheel to them. You felt like a third musketeer or whatever. Yeah. Do you see now maybe why you weren't included? Or do you still think that you should have been? I would have liked to still have been included. I would have like told to like still like put things aside or say like, hey, use this as a way to like bring us all back together. But again, that was a naive thing to think because like why would he? Like when I rewatch it and when I talk about it, I'm just like, okay, yeah, I can understand why he wouldn't want me to know about it. But his reasoning was like that I would tell the rest of the house.

And he wouldn't have. I wouldn't have. I'm a vault in a lot of ways. Yeah. Yeah. Do you blame him then for icing you out? I did. Yeah. Lindsay's reaction during that whole fight, again, she was very stoic, very cold. I hated that. I know. You hated that. Because I know that she did it so much with other people. And, you know, when you think that you're the exception and not the rule, I thought that I would be the exception. And that's the moment where I'm like, I'm not. I'm not. I'm just like everyone else.

You're getting the same treatment. Wow. I think watching that, like we could totally see you. breaking because it's hurtful and it really felt like she just switched on yeah and I couldn't believe that we had gotten to that point yeah do you have any regrets on that whole situation the biggest regret I think was and again this was a lose of the situation but the engagement party I was drinking the entire day you could have like I didn't know there was going to be an engagement party later on and I was just like so emotional and I was like I thought about not going but I thought that would look also terrible to be the only person not there. And so that would be a whole conversation. And then I show up and I don't act right. So I was just like that, you know. Yeah. That I would take

that part back. Yeah. Are you speaking to Carl now? Not really, but one of my good friends recently passed away and they were friends as well. And he knew him. So, you know, he reached out. He said really sweet thing so it's really hard to in that moment still hate the guy yeah but do you hate him for her now or do you still hate him for you just the way that just the way that things went down yeah i just don't i didn't agree with and i'm not someone who who typically plays switzerland yeah right oh really oh we didn't know so did your friendship with lindsay start coming back to life. You said it's still a work in progress. When this happened or were you working on repairing the friendship even before? We were working on the friendship way before. Okay.

Like I wouldn't have wanted to film another season without some conversation before we started. And so we met. And the conversation helped. Yeah. Well, we took Andy's advice. What did he say? At the reunion, he was like, you guys need to just sit down. Yeah. And if you guys want a friendship, prioritize that. talk off camera, do it, you know, so we did. So you did. And you're saying it's, do you think it could ever be the same as what it was? I don't think either of us want it to be like that. I think we want to do something entirely new. Yeah. I think that's, I mean, you were saying this before and it's funny. I wrote it down too and was thinking it. I felt your friendship. I said Malika before, but it's actually a Jordan and Kylie situation. Because even Kylie now says, she said in one of her

latest interviews that Jennifer Lawrence interviewed her for interview magazine. And Jennifer Lawrence was like, you're good with Jordan now. Like, and she was like, yeah, she's like, we needed this to happen because we were codependent. She would probably still be living with me. Jordan found herself. Kylie was able to, and now they're friends again, probably in a different way. Yes. And that's exactly it. Like it kind of, we were too intertwined, too codependent. It was every day. It was nonstop. And so I think we just, I hate the way it went down. down, but I think it needed to happen for us to like have what we have now. Yeah, that's great then.

Yeah. And also you were talking about it before, like you were able to create a friendship with the other girls and not be iced out because you're a team, Lindsay. Right. And I think that they saw that and Lindsay as well. And maybe it's starting to kind of bridge that gap where it's like, okay, the other half of us is not so bad. Like, why are we still holding grudges from years ago?

Why do we care? Like, let's just, like, all hang out and have a good time. That's good. So you're cool with everyone. You said you watched Southern Charm for your girl page. Yeah. So you're super good with Paige. Super good with Amanda.

Yes. Sierra. Sierra, everybody. Like, I love them. Gabby. Gabby. Yeah. Can you tell us anything about that?

Anything about, um, Sam and Corey? Gosh, that. It's, it's been a rough winter house. Yeah. Watching it back. Like, it takes a toll on any. But he didn't, we didn't see anything major from him. It's just the fact that like they weren't defined.

Yeah. And you left the door just enough open for women to maybe think that they had a chance with you. And I think that's what sucked. Yeah. I mean, good for her then if she took that and, you know, and decided that that's not for her. Yeah. You know, let's talk about your new man, Missy. First of all, you said you watched a lot of Bravo.

Were you watching, be honest, Southern Hospitality? I have seen Southern Hospitality before meeting Joe. Okay, so you knew who he was? Yes. And had like an eye. Because he has some hair. You said he liked hair. He has his little hair.

I wasn't, I wasn't, at BravoCon, I wasn't even, like, thinking. You didn't come to get your mojo back at BravoCon? I was just like, because it's work, right? Like, it's more about the fans and about anything else. And it is exhausting. So I wasn't even putting myself out there because I was like, I don't even know if I could like perform. But, you know, he was.

He was after you. Yeah. And it was great. Like, it was instantaneous chemistry. And I really enjoyed it. So you hooked up there. You guys were pretty open about it. Yeah.

And you're dating. Yeah. And we found out that you texted us all the next morning. We all knew. Yep. And now you're dating. Yeah. So it's been.

I was just in Charleston for my first time. Oh, my God. Yeah. Wait, so Southern Hospitality for those of don't know. I think you just said, oh, my God. I did. Yeah. That's my real excited.

Oh, my God. Is he, that means he works for Leva? Yeah. Like, it's a Vanderpump Rules style show. Yes. He works for Leva. Does Leva give you any tea on him? So, so we get back from Robicon, and obviously, Lindsay and I do our download, and I'm talking about Joe.

And so she immediately texts Leva, just. to like make sure, okay, is this guy cool? Like, do we like him? And Leva had nothing but amazing things to say. So that was like another reason. I was like, okay, do like this guy. And she, I saw her last night and she ships it. She ships it.

Are there any fears for you since you're now in this industry for a while? And some morality people can be shady that there is like, oh, maybe we can't, if I'm Danielle's hot stuff right now. like opportunistic you know right a little bit so the thought obviously crosses your mind a little bit but I'm just like in this place where I don't care I'm just leaning all the way in yeah oh we said leaning in era yeah you're in your leaning in hour yeah because like I'm a year out from like my last relationship I feel like I'm ready yeah I'm not just looking for casual stuff now is he is he relationship ready yeah he's a relationship guy yeah so like for both of us like the timing is pretty pretty perfect and is he a reality tv type of dude or is he like he happened to get on

the show because he was working at the rest of yeah like when we talk like he has plants like outside of that okay good we like that okay good then i ship too i'm happy for you i feel like everybody is yeah right are you feeling that he's wonderful i think i'm pretty great despite some episodes that might be coming up on Winterhouse. Oh, no. Because I was going to say, like, so far, like, I feel like you never, the things people could say about you, you said this word earlier, which is another trigger word for me, cringe, right?

Yeah. If that's the worst somebody can say, right? I used to be, the word you used to say is boring. Now I'm cringe. I'm like, to me, those things just make me human. Yeah. Like, it's not, I feel like, you know, reality of me is so crazy. We see what happens with housewives and the drama and the, that.

it's not that bad no you know if that's your worst take it you know take it you know take it and run i saw a video from bravo con Amanda and Kyle saying that they would bring back Hannah yeah I think enough time has passed like why are we still holding on to like yeah any grudges between Kyle and Hannah and like what went down yeah I mean she's hilarious yeah I don't think she would come back I don't I don't think she would either but it would be nice that like if we had a party that she would just come through and it would be like normal. It would be like nice that everyone was okay. Yeah.

At BravoCon, Carl and Lindsay were both there. Did you have to make sure that there wouldn't be any like overlap? Yeah, I was on the lookout. And there was like moments where I'm just like, he's right there. You know, just texting her like just be prepared. Just because there's always that sinking feeling when you see someone you don't want to see. But if you're prepared going into it, you kind of like walk in with your head held high. And like that's what I wanted for her.

You think they'll ever speak again? Them? Yeah. I don't, I don't think so. Did she let go of that timeline that she was so tightly on? Did this let her? Yeah, I think that it's definitely loosened up a bit, but she's still a romantic. She still wants to get married.

She still wants to have babies. And I, you know, she's dating right now. So, like, she's putting herself out there. What do you think about people still go into Mexico for their wedding weekend? So a lot of my friends still went. But what I didn't like was some people putting it on Instagram and, like, showing, like, you know, Carl's mom and a photo. And I'm just like, this is not cool. It's a little tacky.

Yeah. Yeah. You could have fun with people. You don't want to lose the money. You still go. Yeah. Still go. Still have fun.

But, like, don't put it out there. Yeah. Don't rub it in people's faces. You girls still went on, like, her vatterette that was supposed to be, right? It was. Yeah. That was a lot of fun. Do you think that some people should just retire from the show?

I mean, I might be. one of those people. I'm like, I'm hitting my stride, but maybe I should, you know, put the cleats up. You have a good five more years. I don't know. There is a shelf life to it, but like. Once you have, once babies, maybe. Yeah. Yeah. I just. Or when, you know, life. Yeah. Sometimes you just want to move on for me. Yeah. I mean, I really did like my part time gig that season four. You liked that. You really liked it? Yeah. And I know people, like, oh, like, that's an, like, it, like, it hurts your ego. whatever, I, I, I, it was fun for you. Yeah. Because you started this whole thing for the fun and not for the, you know, you were there for the right reason. Your entire life is summer. It's a lot.

Yeah. Like, my entire year, it becomes about summer. Yeah. And then now I'm like, with winter and some, I'm just like, what season is it? Like, where am I? What did you think about Schwartz and Flooddy? I loved it. You did? I loved it. Because, like, didn't you think it was ridiculous the Katie name thing? And her middle name is Marie. No, that is pretty crazy. No, I didn't mean like that's crazy. But did you think it was crazy that that's the reason why he was like staying away?

Yeah. You feel like it was like an excuse or something? But I guess if, I don't know, Robert might be it. I wouldn't want to start hooking up with another Robert. Oh, it would be weird for you too. Yeah. Okay. So that's a thing.

It's just like a, I don't know. You think about it. Yeah. Who is the worst housemate on the show? Ooh. On Winter House. On Winter House? Yeah.

Ooh, that is a good one. Maybe I didn't see Corey clean a lot. No. And he was always the last to wake up or come out of his room. Who knows what he was doing in there? But he was always the last to come out and it was already clean. The situation was. Oh my God.

I don't know how you guys do it. When I see the cleaners in the morning, like I would have to clean too because it's like you can't live in that. But I would be so mad. Yeah. Well, because there was a meme out there where it was just like about like, just the food and like us like just throwing like why do we throw food everywhere like I don't understand it either yeah like we kept goldfish in business I think because we were just throwing

goldfish around and we would just re up like why were we getting more why just to throw it no that's so it it didn't it doesn't make sense but we just like to fling food when we're when you're drunk if I'm asked back I would I would do it again I think you know I don't know I have a boyfriend I don't know, but like having a single Lindsay or a single, like both of us, that could be really fun taking on the handpins. I mean, you're not single right now. But I was just, I thought about it and I took a back. Would Joe, would you want Joe to come on if we were still dating? Joe would arrive at Summer House.

You would? Yeah. Okay. Let's go Summer. Thank you, babe. Thanks for coming on. This is so fun. Good.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. Oh my God. Thank you guys so much for listening to this episode of Not Skinny, but not fat. Follow me on Instagram at Not Skinny, but not fat. Subscribe to the podcast

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