Not Skinny But Not Fat - Robby Hoffman is Not Running for President

Episode Date: April 28, 2026

Hilarious Comedian Robby Hoffman is here! We discuss her sold out tour and successful Standup special, her humble beginnings, being one of 10 kids, fan girling, her I made it moments and more!This episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct, or indirect financial interest in products, or services referred to in this episodeGet $25 off your first purchase when you go to therealreal.com/notskinnyGo to http://www.ro.co/notskinny to see if your insurance covers GLP-1s—for free.Go to zbiotics.com/NOTSKINNY and use NOTSKINNY at checkout for 15% off any first time orders of ZBiotics products.Text NOTSKINNY to 64000 to get 20% off all IQBAR products, plus FREE shipping. Message and data rates may apply. Visit us at samedelman.com to explore everything you need for spring and get 15% off with code NOTSKINNY15Use code AMANDA for 15% off your order – get leakproof undies, amazing wireless bras, and so much more at knix.comGo to perelelhealth.com and use code NOTSKINNY for 20% off your first order.Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a dear media production. Welcome back to the not skinny bonafat podcast. I'm your host, Amanda Hirsch, and I still can't believe that I get to chat with some of my favorite stars on my very own podcast, where you'll feel like you're just talking shit with your best friends in your living room. Hi, guys. Happy Tuesday. Welcome back to Not Skinny Bonafat.

You guys this morning started Roof, Roof, Roof, because, listen, this. Summerhouse, a reunion clips that were leaked. I'm first of all, like, I'm such a fucking arc. I'm like, who leaked it? You know, like, I don't know anybody in my life that wants this information early. You know, like, we, I barely want to watch, like, movie trailers anymore. I want to watch the thing, you know, so, like, don't ruin it for me. But who on set was like, let me record this and let me release it?

Who? Like, I, that's what I care about more. than watching like Sierra obliterate Amanda and West. Like I swear to God, I want to know who did this and why. What's in it for you? I saw there rumors that are saying it was West and I'm like, that would be psycho. That would be psycho of him.

Also, it's not going to look good for him no matter how he twists it. You guys know, I have really middle of the line takes. I do always try to see both sides. I'm not going to call myself an empath because I get fucking burned when I do that. but I will say like, yes, I'm an empath. I feel for Amanda and West, who are the most hated people in America right now, because at the end of the day,

no matter how you twist it, turn it, say it's disgusting, messy, awful, like all the words, nobody killed anyone. Even in this situation, nobody cheated. I know some people think maybe Amanda and West started earlier, but as of right now, nobody cheated. And by the way, if Amanda did cheat on Kyle,

it really wouldn't be the end of the world because he cheated on her 1,000 million times. But so let's say nobody cheated, right? So it's just a friend doing a fucked up, like, unforgivable thing to a friend. And at the end of the day, like, we all know how much Sierra fucking loved West. We know she couldn't talk about him without tearing up. Like, I, my pain for her pain when she literally can't look at this man without, tears in her eyes because of her love for him. So that makes it even wilder for Amanda to do what she did.

And, you know, in the leaked clip, like Amanda says, like, you can't help who you like. And Sarah was like, yeah, you can. And it is true, like, that West shouldn't have even been, like, a smidge of an option for her. And it might have sounded like from the leaked clips, like, maybe it did. start as like a drunken thing and then progress. But like this is what I know for sure. You know, they will not stay together. They will not get married.

They will not have babies. What Mia said in the leaked things in the leaked audio that was like, you went from being married to being one of West side bitches. Like that is true. That is the truest say meant that I've heard so far. Like, why Amanda? Why? Like you're, he's not going to change for you.

Like, look what he puts. with Sierra through. But I might, so this is where my like, in good measure, level-headedness, in my opinion, comes through. I can with the same beat as saying, this is awful, fucked up, disgusting, like, Team Sierra, all of that. I can also say, Sierra and Wes weren't together for two years. West ended it horribly.

She hated him after because he went on interviews saying, I never really fucking liked her. She wasn't really my girlfriend. Makes it more disgusting that they probably flirted after. Maybe they even hooked up after. That could be a very big possibility. However, in terms of like dated, it's been, you know, two years. And also, we saw how little it meant to him, but how much it meant to her.

However, this isn't Scandival. I saw Sierra and Ariana team up. Women scolded, taking over the world. Love to see it. However, it's not the same situation. Sandoval was fucking. you know, making embryos with Ariana. Okay.

So don't, that annoys me. Like, don't take it to that level. And I think that's why, like, West is getting so confused and thinking he can go in defensive. He can go in clearing timelines because he really, I feel like wants to shake up America and be like, you guys, we weren't together. Like, this isn't what you're making it out to be. However, like, everyone's fully aware, I believe, of what it is. We are conflating it with a scand-a-ball.

It shouldn't be. The reason we're complaining it with the Scandival it's because it's a big reality-to-be scandal. And, you know, Ariana was a woman scolded who then went to fucking... Her career blew up, you guys. And that is the truth. I need you to face the truth.

Ariana before Scandival was a side character of Annapump Forles. Nobody fucking cared. She said it herself, okay? Of course, you're given an opportunity. You fucking sees it. You fucking show the world what you can do. But the opportunities,

she got came from her, you know, blowing up after the scandal. I don't know when this became a thing in America where it's like when you get hurt people, you become really famous. Like I, I'm trying to like just psychoanalyze it. Like, it means like you're hot. And then everyone wants a fucking piece.

Everyone wants a piece. Eyes are on you. Engagement is at a all time high. Sierra just got signed on for Dancing with the Stars. she's the biggest deal to be on dancing with the stars. Like, not only is she on dancing with the stars, like, let's say, you know, that's like a great accomplishment, but that was the announcement that was like the whoa, you know what I mean? Like, so what I'm saying is like Sierra's having, oh my God, the best fucking moment of her

life right now. Like she doubled in followers. She's getting opportunities that are insane and she will continue to get those. Like Andy said, she's the most beautiful person on Bravo. These people fucked her over, but these people are like in the ghetto. Like, I just don't feel we need to be, like, rubbing that much salt on the wound. Like, they are wounded animals. They are not coming back from this, in my opinion.

And they're going to be dogged on in the reunion. They're going to be dogged on online. And it's just like, I don't know how much, like, people can take where, like, the other person, like, got hurt. but now they're doing very well. So I don't know. I just, that's my like, that's my only qualm with it. Internet can get very intense

and everyone's like, well, they deserve it. I don't know. I don't know that they deserve it from the world. They can deserve it if you fuck up, you know, and in your own life and you get shit from the person, you did it to or, but like from the world for people to like act like they murdered someone, that I can't take.

Even if it's like so disgusting, so cringy, so gross, so unforgivable. I think we need to just, it's just too much. I literally can't take it. I literally can't take it. And it's also wild. Like I look back at Amanda, like Amanda before this, she, I equate her to like an untouchable.

Remember how I thought that about Blake lively before the Blake lively thing happened? That just goes to show you. We love to fucking like turn on a woman, shit on a woman, like, and turn her into like a social pariah if we can. And with the Alex and Alex stuff too, It's like, don't we, like, didn't we want to stop pitting women against each other? I guess they pit themselves against each other.

And then the internet is taking sides, taking sides. This is the hypocrisy of the world. Everyone's like, girls, girls. No, people are dying to take sides, dying to take a woman down if she's down. Like, we haven't gone anywhere. We haven't progressed anywhere. So let's not fucking pretend we did. I don't know what I'm on.

I am on my period, as you know. Oh, my God, I didn't even, like, talk to you guys about the whole week. that I had, I was in LA for Hulu's Get Real event where I was hosting and interviewing all these reality stars from the Huluverse and where I also announced

the new Hulu show Get Real. It's a show on Hulu that I'm hosting a few episodes and it's also, you can listen to it as a podcast and it's basically like a talk show about all the Hulu reality shows because there are

a lot and there are a lot coming, like all the stuff that was announced at Hulu. Anyway, of course, this, all the stuff that was announced at the Hulu Get Real Event, like the girls with, like, Chloe Kardashian's friends, there's the new Dancing with the Stars Pro, there's Nader Sisters Season 2, Mormons, O.C. I mean, the, like, Hulu reality is just exploding. So we needed a place to talk about it all. And obviously, I'm so fucking excited. It's a dream come true. I mean, I've always said, like, what I would want is my own talk show. And this is definitely a step in that direction. So super cool, super excited. Check it out. It's get real on Hulu. First episode is out. And it was just so cool and so exciting and so many moments.

I might have to do a whole solo episode about like all the funny moments that I had with those fucking crazy reality TV stars at that event. Because listen, reality TV stars are a different animal. Like they're not me and you, babes. They're not me and you. Let me tell you. Let me tell you. Let me tell you. Let's move on to today's episode, today's episode, because it's with a comedian that I think, is so fucking funny. I love her. I love her wife. They're both so cute together. She's a fellow Jewess. She's hysterical. And she's Robbie Hoffman. Rabbi Hoffman. So enjoy. No, and then the coffee people annoyed me because they looked at me crazy when I asked for honey. They looked at me crazy when I asked for half and half. I was like, do you have anything? And you know what he says to me? We have high

fat milk. And I was like, what is that? Right? I was like, are you trying to make me not want it? You know what I'm saying? Like, say whole milk. Like, right? Are you trying to tell me I'm fat? Like, if you choose this, it's a high fat? You look great. Thank you. Not fat at all. Not skinny, but not fat. There we go. High fat? No, I hate them. I'm never going back there. Look what's going on. I'm a disaster today. I was going to ask if you're wearing one of your good shirts for me or not. You know what? This is a new good shirt. It's a good shirt? Yeah. The flannel or the white? But, well, this I wear a lot. I have two good white shirts.

Yeah. This one, I buy, like, used shirts and then I have them tailored, shortened a bit. Fancy. All, like, literally, I could spend $15 on a shirt and as much tailoring it. But I'm going to wear it so much more. Yeah. And you said you thrift all your stuff. Yeah. Everything is thrifted pretty much.

I don't thrifted everything, but most stuff is thrifted. I'm so excited you're here. I'm so happy to be here. I think you're so funny. I mean, obviously. I'm not alone. Everybody's on to you now. Thank you.

She's not an overnight success. By the grace of God. Best believe. Does that, if people are like, oh, my God, overnight success, that annoys you? Not at all. Whenever people come to me, I'm thrilled. Yeah? I'm thrilled.

We're doing the joy in the world. Like, do you know what I mean? I feel like, like, with everything going on, it's like, I'm not going to be mad. Yeah. You sound me now. Thank God. But I've been doing all this for people to find me. But, Robbie, what's the deal with your name for?

for presidential signs. Oh, so it's actually, yeah. So there have been signs popping up around the nation, Robbie Hoffman for president, which I'm in no mood. But if I feel like if the signs are up, I might, like, maybe I am called upon.

Maybe it is like Moses. Like, why me, God? I'm in no mood, but they've already printed the signs. Wait, is there a Robbie Hoffman running? It turns out. It turns out. There is a bald fellow. named Robbie Hoffman, who is gung how about he's nobody has ever heard of him.

Perhaps now his campaign was a little better known. And he's really early on the signs. I mean, nobody else is campaigning yet. 26, he is Jan 1. He went hard. And your fans found it. Like people started sending it to you. And people, you know, I would run on things like noise pollution and, you know, just.

Well, that was so funny. motorcycles. I thought maybe people were putting it up for you. I know. And then I'm like, oh, God, this is how Moses felt. Like, why me, God? I can't even like I'm in no mood. You know what cracked me up about you that I feel is important for people to know is that

when I reached out to you, usually like, you know, you reach out through the PR or the you talk to the person, they send you. And you were like, no, it's me. Hi. Are you really doing your own, like. Yeah, I do a lot of my own stuff. You do your own stuff. Yeah.

because I don't know. Nobody told, like, I was just set up. Nobody, people have all these like teams, you know. Yeah. For Netflix I had, they give you, they help you with PR and stuff like that. But it's like pretty much just like, Seth Myers, like, do you want to do the show? I'm like, what dates do you have? I just, nobody really told me that this is, I was always doing it myself.

I mean, people in DM sometimes ask me to do a comedy show. And I go, yeah, what time they go, oh my God, you responded. I shall be there. I love that. I hope that doesn't change, but it might. I hope it changes. I am trying to sell out as soon as humanly possible. Like, I've been, like, putting it out there, like, Hollywood.

Like, I don't want to do all this. I don't want to work this hard. No, I don't want to be with the calendar, and I've got to get my book out. I've had to go back to paper because Google Cal cannot get it together. Wait, and you flying in row 53? Yeah. Why? You're making money.

No, I know. You know what? The thing is, is like, and by the way, Rocham, amazing, amazing money. But here's the thing about growing up poor. So now that I'm doing theaters, sold out theaters, thank you very much. New York for a stop of the tour. I can't thank you enough. So it's a very pretty penny that night. However, I used to do clubs. And in clubs, they pay your room and board when you do the improv, San Jose, God knows. Chas for Shalom, you're there. But let's say you're there. They give you a hotel that night.

You know, it's at the, you know, holiday and express with the, you know, the dinner is included at your own risk. But when you do theaters, everything is like a la carte. They were explained to me, like, yeah, we make all this money. But if you even have a cheese plate in your green room, like, you think it's yours. Yeah. Like, they're like, do you want cheese? Do you want? I'm like, sure.

I'll take a banana. And then on the bill, they actually, and they upcharge it. Like a cheese plate, if you went on bought your own, maybe even the night, you know, maybe you'd have for one person a $40 cheese plate. But they'll give you like, they'll be like, it was $300. So because everything is a la carte, the flight isn't included. When I'm traveling alone, what do I care? You don't care?

I'm just on my book. I'm working on my material. I'm listening to my tunes. I'm in 53A. nobody bothers me. I don't ask for anything. The lady comes, do you need anything?

I need nothing. I have my water. I bring my own water. I'm fine. When I'm traveling with Gabby with my wife, that's when I splurge because I'm like, then we're pressing play on the movie at the same time. Like, it's a whole different experience.

It's an experience. You know what I mean? I'm with her. But alone, I mean, now I can say I was at the pod hotel. People were like, are you staying here? I'm like, yeah, I moved to a much nicer hotel when Gab comes in.

Wait, the pot hotel in Brooklyn. Yeah, there's the pod. I stay at the Jane sometimes. So you're not fanciing it up at the Bowery. I don't fancy it up on my dime. I see what you're saying. On other people's got, when the club pays, when the TV show puts me up, when hacks, phenomenal.

Yeah. If you tell me it's Al-Cardia, I don't need anything. Yeah. If it's free, I'll take it. You're low maintenance. Yeah, I'm just like, I could sleep in a little twin bed pod. I'm just so cozy. and I'm ready to work.

I just, yeah, but with Gab, that to me is now an experience. You said you're in an interclass relationship. Like, she can't imagine. She's a first class, girl. Yeah, she's first class only. Yeah. But also it's the point that, like, if you do see her at the back of the plane, people are like, Gab's here.

Like, it's kind of like when. And if they see you at the back of the plane, it makes sense. Some, like, sometimes I'm like unrecognizable. Like, I look, like, I have the ability to look so ugly and different than I do. Like I can't even explain. Like my daily glow up is unbelievable. What a shower does for me. What like just fresh face does for me.

Just a little water on the face. Yeah. But I'll go to the airport looking like people are like, I think it's you, but is it you? But yeah, when they see Gab at the back of the plane, it's kind of like when I first watched comedians and cars getting coffee, Jerry Seinfeld's hat on Silverman, Sarah Silverman. Yeah. And, you know, I was very poor. and watching the show, and I'm in the middle of nowhere, Montreal,

and freezing and watching us on my computer. And I was like, he pulls up. And she's like in an apartment. And I'm like, Sarah Silverman's in an apartment. I'm like, how can I even dream? Like, what's the point of working so hard? It's like, I'm still going to be there. Turns out she had the money not to be.

And thank God, she's not anymore. But it's like people don't want to see Gab and me necessarily an economy because it's like they want to dream. Right. Like, why are we this? Yeah. We've been at it. They've seen us at it.

And they're like, hard work does not pay off at all. Like, the American dream is that day. Yeah. Yeah. They want to pass you in first. Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, but I, it's, it's, it was great.

Listen, it's not great. And my seat also, like, it was the kind of seat that he went back, but it would slowly go forward again. I had to constantly keep on it. Yeah. Like every five or ten minutes, I'd like, I wonder if my seat's all the way back. And it wasn't. Like, you know what I mean?

That is the difference too. Like first class, you could get some help with that, probably. First class, it's unacceptable. But you know what's nice about you? Because it's kind of like when you go first class, you usually can't go back. But you're saying you have no problem. I go back. You go back.

You can enjoy the experience. Depends who's paying. Listen, I'm the boy in my relationship. I pay a lot. When somebody else is paying, it's a lot. it's unusual for me. I enjoy that. Yeah, it is nice.

And you're right, there is the, there's the difference for the listener to know between your job puts you up, blah, blah, blah, and then them giving you a sum of money and you can split it up

however you want to. I'm splitting it. If it's mine, my budget is nothing. They're like, wow, you don't know, I don't need the cheese plate in the grill.

I don't touch it. I know. I thought they're just asking, like, I didn't know that we're being charged. Yeah. I don't, I don't touch the food. But that's interesting.

You're saying that to me. What is it called when a artist makes their? Right. I am the type of girl who I don't know what to order when I'm at a restaurant. Yeah. So asking me what my rider is, I'm like, I don't know. And I don't know what that says about me. You know what I mean?

Like I don't even know what I want that's not fancy, you know? No, exactly. Like water? Yeah, I like water. I'll have a light beer and I'll have, like, I've had on my rider like a banana. Just in case I'm hungry, but I don't want a full meal before I would. work before I'm running around stage for an hour. I like to eat after if I can. So I have gotten there and there's be like a bottle of water and one single banana. One single banana. It was really your year

this year. There's been. There's been. Yeah. There's been. When it rains, it pours vibes. Yeah. It's funny. It's like everybody, for the past 10 to 15 years, everybody's been saying, it's like, it's your, it depends where you find me that you think it's the year. Yeah. It's been. It's been. Like, it's like every time I go home and my old friends, like from childhood or high school, like, it's so funny that they're like, you know, what's your break or like this is your big break? It's like I've not had one thing. Right. It really has just been a culmination of many bricks. Like I really am.

It's been brick by brick, but each one feels amazing. Like the first time I got $1,000 to write something was as amazing as, you know, the first. Like, they were pivotal moments in building this career. It's so true. Because people have that question, like, what was your like I made it moment? But it's so true that you have the like, you had, you know, 200 views when before you had it won. It feels like amazing. It feels amazing.

And every step has felt amazing. And I think that the difference or something, and this I learned from my brother Lavey, we celebrate everything in my family. Like because I was so like little, it's like, you fucking did this. Like let's say like, you know, like, you know, people, I bought this watch for the first time I got. Is it a rolling? Yeah. It's a vintage rolling 1991. My little sister was born that year and it was a family project that I first sold.

It was $65,000, which was the most amount of money I'd ever made for anything. Wait, what's a family project? It was a family project I wrote maybe. Oh, you wrote six or seven years ago. And I bought this, you know, I spent 36,000. on this watch, 5,500. I negotiated 3,600. Wait, that's a good price. Very, very good price. How much is it worth today? About 5,500 they're asking price, which I knew at the time. But anyway, and my brother always said, like, you know, he's got three kids. We grew up in welfare. He takes

care of his family. He works like a dog. And he's like, I always lease a good car that I like, because it's like, I'm picking up the kids. I'm like, this is like the one treat. Like, you have to take a little bit off the top. And I do that for this. Whether it's this, taking 3,000 from 65,000, or whether it's small things. Gab got a callback or I got a call back. We're going for dinner tonight. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're celebrating it.

Oh, no, to chow, whatever. All you can eat, I don't care. You know, we're going. You don't have the like. I acknowledge every win. I love that. That's so important. Do you, so you don't get like Fulhamsa like.

I do. I do. I do, I do, brooch Hashem. But we're acknowledging what happened. Okay. I'm not saying what? I don't know. Okay.

That's important. But this itself is a win. I agree. I'm like that too because people, you know, get very superstitious. They don't like to tell people sometimes. They think that if they're happy, it won't. But I agree with that. It's like, no, I got this callback.

That's a huge deal. If I told everybody and then I don't get it, we can still be excited. Oh, I took it too far. You know, I'm not telling everyone. Okay. Just at home with your spouse, maybe your sister. your parents, you can have private celebrations. I don't mean you're running around.

You know, the big celebrations, once it's done and out there and fine, that's so much fun too. But the private, I remember being so poor. And when I got that $1,000 that I wrote a script. Because when I started stand-up, I thought every stand-up did also wrote. I didn't realize it's a whole other career. Because when I started stand-up, I really didn't know stand-up. up. And then the ones that I looked up, it was like, Jerry Seinfeld, he was a standup. Ellen was a standup. She had a show. Like all these standups had shows. So I thought they all wrote. So I committed as much to writing. I just, I always did both. And when I got a thousand dollar option for this, at HBO Canada for this idea that I wrote, a thousand dollars seemed insane. And I remember taking the metro at the time I was still in Montreal. I took the metro home from school and I stopped by the corner store and I bought myself a single

beer, you know, and they sell the cans. It's like, I have to celebrate this. Like, I needed that $1,000 like more than anything. But I'm like, it, I have to. And I just had a singular beer in my apartment, which is not something I really did coming home from school or, you know, like I just, but I needed to acknowledge that. And I wouldn't splurge on a beer or something like that back then and I just did, even privately, me. And it was wonderful. And I still remember that, the satisfaction of that. Yeah. We'll be right back after the break. It is wild how many bars are out there. Like, everyone's trying to make a protein bar out there. Okay. Like, it's in such high demand. Like, why wouldn't they? Like, everyone wants a bar and needs a bar. You know, I'm a bar

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standups just do standup. And a lot of writers. But they're writing the material for their standup. Yeah, They write their materials, but I also wrote television. Okay, you thought they were writing the shows that they were on. Yeah, I also assumed, and that was perfect for me because I loved to write. I also was, so I'm like, oh, wow, we'll do it all. We are, but I wrote a script and then I looked up, like, how to put it in script format. You've seen scripts. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They're in, like, final draft. And that software was like $699 Canadian, so maybe $4.99. on USDA. I'm like, are they out of their goddamn minds that for typewritten, they're going to charge me? So it took me twice as long to even, I wrote the script in probably a week because by the time that I figured out I wanted to write, I had so many ideas to write. So I could get them out quick, because I'm like, oh, I could do this. And it took me almost twice as long to figure out what is the format it's in and to do it in word. Like to make it look like you did it. And you know if you're working in Word, it's demented.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's, it's, it can cause mania. I believe it's like, you know when you hear about like weed can trigger like mania or schizophrenia, I do believe working in Word to make a final draft document can trigger the exact same. And then like, what font did you choose? I found the exact font. No.

It's in Coriard 12. I said they have it. I remember like in my apartment, like those wins. And I put it in, I p-d-fed it. I printed it for free at work. and I put it in Manila envelopes. I used to steal all kinds of supplies at work. Where did you work?

KPMG. I had an internship. That's the accounting firm. Because you were going to be a CPA. Yeah. I mean, the greatest thing I could even dream of being is having a professional job.

And you were good with numbers. Like you would have passed the test. Yeah. Yeah. I would have been partner. If not doing this, I would be partner in accounting firm. It's no problem. So you were destined to make some money then?

I had to make money. As soon as I found out I was gay, I'm like, I got to get cash. Like, these girls aren't going to pay for themselves. It's going to fall on me. Because before I was gay, I was going to marry rich. That was my other plan. Oh, okay. Like, I had a good figure.

The fellows liked me. I knew rich Jewish boys. Yeah. I got to go to this, like, really fancy school for free at high school. Uh-huh. And I was, like, poor and looked down upon. but some people fucked with me. Yeah.

And I had a good personality. And boys liked you. Boys liked me because I didn't like them. You know, they're into that. Yeah. And I was hideous. No, I was, I saw pigs. That's not true.

No, no, no. I cleaned up well, but day to day, I was hideous. And these guys, and I just was going to do that. But then I found out I was gay. And I'm like, oh, my God, I have to be that now. Wait, what age was that? I have to be the rich Jewish boy. That's awful.

Maybe 17, 18. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Because I saw you. was the throwback photos where you're wearing like really low pants. What error was that for you? How old were you? Do you know what a picture I'm talking about? Really long hair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really low pants. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That might be making a comeback in my house. Gabs, gabs in them now. Oh, yeah, yeah, she is. Oh, yeah. Gabs in them now. And they look much better on her than they would

be now. But back then, they looked okay on me. They did. So you're saying the boys liked you. You didn't like them. Then you were like, I like girls. I got to make money. Money. And but you still wanted to, so then the accounting idea came, the accounting was great because I'm like, okay, like school felt like not everybody in my family went to school. I remember when I told my mother I was going to university. She was like, well, I can't do all that. My mother. Yeah, I went to Miguel.

By the way, that was my dream school. I didn't get in. Oh, wow. No. I only applied to Miguel because it was local. I was in Montreal. And it's super cheap, right? Yeah, it would be close to free for me to go if I got it.

Yeah, it's super. super cheap for residents, right? Yeah, yeah. It was $3,000 a year. Wow. So you got in. Yeah. You graduated. Yeah. So you just didn't end up doing graduate school. I quit graduate school. Oh, you quit graduate school. Yeah, I got into McGill for graduate school for my CPA for CA in Canada, but they do CPA there as well. And I quit. Because the comedy writing was kind of taken over. Yeah, I just, I wouldn't wish a calling on anyone, especially poor. people. It's horrible to have a job. I was making $32,5,500 salary. And that was unbelievable, even just to have a salary. I mean, that's a lot for when was this? I was 22 years old.

Yeah. And I was like king of the like me making $32,000 was like I would go out with these dykes and lesbians who were all kind of rich kids looking back like they grew up in New York or Connecticut. They went to McGill, which was very expensive for them to go. too because it was out of state obviously. And they would cosplay poverty. You know, they were all doing potlucks and this and that. And I was like, I was like the big man, like I would take girls up like, shat, shot, shot, shot.

Like, you know, they would chastise me for working for the man. I had a corporate job. But they didn't work at all. Yeah. Wait, I saw your take on potlux. I agree. I agree. I agree.

I agree. I agree. I'm not bringing something to something. to somebody's rich house. To somebody's rich. What if they're not rich? Then I bring something. Oh, okay.

Yeah. It's also like, if you get invited to a dinner party, do you ask what can I bring? I kind of do it. Here's the whole thing. People are like, I brought a bottle of wine the other day to my friend's house. And he was like, I thought you don't bring this. Like, I'm also joking. It's like in my first stand-up special, you know, I go hard on pizza.

I'm like, yeah, pizza's not the greatest. Like, I'll have pizza. But it's like a last minute thing. You know, and people after shows are like, you know, I'll have a slice of pizza. Like, this is really good. It's like, it's not like, you know what he mean? So it's like I'm not an animal. I will bring something.

But I also like to change it up. You know, my friend Carmen had people over late a bunch of comedians and whatever. And we were all coming from shows after. And I just surprise everyone with like 100 bucks of McDonald's. Oh, you like McDonald's. Oh, yeah. And you worked there. Yeah, I worked at McDonald's.

Greatest restaurant in the world. What's your meal? I do the two cheeseburger meal right now. That's the number two. No, it's a number seven, I think. So what do you mean two cheeseburger? But they give you two little cheeseburgers. Oh.

They're like, they're almost like the ones from the happy meal. They're very small. But you get two. Mm-hmm. And a fry. And a fry. And I like an apple pie. I'm a Big Mac girl.

You know what? I maybe had a Big Mac once. Really? Yes. I got a, I got a, like it seems so big. Okay. Okay, dainty.

Yeah. I mean, it is doubling up. But see, I like, but your Big Mac is what I'm getting, but together. Yeah, yeah, right. Do you understand? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're getting too, and I'm like tapping it off. And I like more bread.

But I'm telling you. And you're having less bread than me. You like more bread. I sometimes eat the burger without the bread. I can't deal with people who do that. But the Big Mac has so much sauce, is what I'm saying. So you're swimming in the sauce. You're swimming in the sauce.

Yeah. So you work to do it. worked at McDonald's. Yeah. What age was that? I was 18. So in Canada? Oh, yeah.

So it's probably clean and a nice McDonald's. It was horrible. We had a piece. We had a, we had a sepsis issue. We had a plumbing, a massive plumbing issue at our McDonald's. Like, it would be closed every so often because it was like poop floating on the floor. So why did you work? Were there not other places?

No, because I was working at a cafe before that was 725 Canadian an hour. So maybe it's like $5 here or something. Yeah. But we heard my friend Chenie came to me, my best. Shout out to Shannie, who worked at McDonald's with me. She's like, McDonald's is like hiring at $11 an hour. Like, she woke me up, like, it was urgent. Like, she was like...

That's kind of wild that McDonald's is like a good, like, they were given good pay. Well, at the time, this franchise, they're all their own restaurants. Like, they had no employee, like, their turnover was so bad that this owner was like, just to get kids working here. Yeah. So we, we, she was like, Shini was like, we're quitting the cafe. And I'm like, Shan, like, I really don't think we should be doing this. And, you know, and that cafe was pretty good.

We would, you know, we would break a cookie every morning to have it, you know, because if something was broken, we couldn't sell it. So she was constantly dropping something. And at McDonald's, you were. And then at McDonald's, we were, yeah, we ate at McDonald's every single day. Did you get fat? No, I guess not. You didn't.

You didn't gain weight. The metabolism was. I'm sure I gained weight, but it wasn't noticeable. And we also. left our shifts, they would let you take soda for free. So I would take extra large soda like a Coke. I would leave with a Coke this big. Every evening I would fill up a full Coke. Well, duh. And then I would drink that at night. Oh my God, working at McDonald's. To now, to now buying for $100. Yeah, I know. McDonald's. Who is not more excited? Okay, it's midnight. No, that's it.

Babe, that's such a fun surprise. It's midnight. I would love that. Forget the bottle of wine. Okay, I go, can you throw in 20 fries and 20 burgers? Let's go. Yes. They love it. I love that. And by the way, my take on the dinner is like, I rather show up with a bottle of wine or a dessert or something or that McDonald's idea, then ask. Because if I ask and you say, yes, we're out of mayonnaise. No.

Can you go get it? No. Then I already am not feeling that great about this. That is cruminal. To pick up last minute, can you grab milk? Can you grab ice? Yeah. I cannot.

Ice I cannot. I know. No, the ice. Ice at the gas station, I cannot grab ice. Wait, ice is the actual most single most annoying thing to ask somebody to grab. It's heavy. You don't know where to find it at the gas station. It's so weird ice.

It's such weird ice. You can't even break. No, you can't buy. But that's the thing people ask for the most, I would think. It's terrible. It's terrible. Like, no, it is hard to bring things. But also at the same time, when people come to my house, you're offering, you're everything.

I have everything. Really? You're a good host. Yeah. Like, literally bring nothing. I do. People bring flowers, which is lovely. Yeah.

You like getting flowers. I do. I love flowers. Does Gabby bring you flowers? We do flowers a lot for each other. For each other. So it's like, you'll get her flowers. She'll get you flowers.

We're always getting flowers. That's so cute. Yeah. I used to have a joke about it. but flower people get annoyed with flowers. They don't do anything. But I'm like, when you're that hot, you don't have to do anything. Like, what do do do you give rocks a hard time?

They don't even look like the flowers just look good. They just look good. That is true. They come out of nowhere in these deep blues. Look what Hashem gave us. They don't have to do anything but look good. We were talking before about the year they are having, the culmination. Thank you.

But this year we got the hacks. We got the Emmy Noms. It's true. We got the rooster. Could you imagine? You're working on a new show with HBO? Yes. What else is going on?

Did I miss anything? The tour, the sold-out tour? Yes. Well, I hesitate to say the other thing. And we're going to have a second leg of the tour announced at some point. I'm trying to shave off some cities. Shave off like make it less. Yes, I'm always trying to make it less.

It's a lot. It's a lot. With how many cities are you? out right now. Like how many is this? This is an eight city tour. Eight city. Okay.

Complete. People are like, are you going to come to Wichita? I'm not coming. There's just, I know. I don't want to go to Wichita. I mean, unless they really force me. So you're like doing the big, the big, the like, you know, New York, L.A. Yeah, we're doing Seattle.

We're going to, you know, I don't want to promise too much, but it looks like we might make the Carolinas have. There are some people who are going to be very, very, very. happy. And when I do go to these places, I probably won't be back, God willing, for another decade. Wait, do you not like touring? I like a very leisurely tour. Yeah. I'm not an, I'm not a road every night. I do so many things. I have, I, I, I, I act, I write, and I take stand-up very seriously. When you pay $50 to see me or whatever the ticket prices are now, I don't look anymore, you're getting, I, money's worth.

Like, I will never waste your dollar. Yeah. And I will, I'm not about to burn myself out and dial it in. I either go 100 or I don't go at all. Yeah. So when you, I do a leisurely tour. We're doing eight cities here.

I think I'm adding about 15 to round out the tour for the second leg, you know. So eight plus 15? Yeah. And that'll be for the whole year. Now, there are people who are on permittours every night. They're going somewhere else. I'll do one, maybe two shows. A week.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I don't know how people do it. People do like 70 city. But some people, that's all they do. Right. So that's fine too. If that's, you know, if that's like I have a very 360 kind of, you know, I then like to toggle between the things I do. You know, people ask me, what do I prefer stand up or writing or acting? And to me, they're all different hats and they all help each other. If I've been on, you know, if I've done great stand up the weekend and, and I have to write that week, the scripts are better for it. Right. You know, the jokes are cleaner for it. Yeah. And did I see that she, did she, she said something like maybe you're not, like when you're on tour, she's the one that need to like check in more. I saw that she said.

Like you can sometimes be very in the zone. Yeah. Yeah. That was surprising to me because you're so like all in. Yeah, I'm so all in. But I never, I'm not like a, I'm not such a texty. type of person. You're a phone call person?

I'm a phone call and I'm like definitely in person. Oh. Like I feel like what's the update? I'm staying in a dump. It's the pod. You don't want to know, babe. Like you don't want to know my life. Like it's brutal. Like there's nothing even to tell her that I, that's like night. But she wants the

like she wants the like, I landed vibes. Yeah. So we do all that now and I love it. You know. Like she kind of taught you that way. Yeah. I want to make sure that she's okay. Like, I like it from her. Yeah. But when she's asking me, I'm okay. I'm like, it's a shithole. Like, there's nothing to say. It's like, like, you know, I'm like, don't worry about me. Wait, the pod? I just want to, it's a Brooklyn one that there's a restaurant

there now. Yeah. It's that one. Yeah. Go to the restaurant. I had a coffee there every the morning. Did you like it? It's fine. But I am kind of shocked her at that hotel, to be honest. I have everybody shocked. Everybody shocked. Everybody's shocked. I'm obsessed. We'll be right back. after the break. Everybody's talking about GLP1s nowadays. Everyone's talking about the peptides. Everyone's doing it. And listen, if at the end of the day,

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Shmala, like the thing that I, the things that I do for my family, they don't realize how embarrassing it is. Like, I have no chill. Okay. So, and it took me years. And maybe it's spectrumy, maybe it's cultural. Who knows? It took me years to develop a media training of some kind that when I see somebody I love, I'm by the way, I'm the biggest fan, this, that and the other, okay. So now I, why is that? But that's okay. No, it's not okay. People don't like it, especially guys. stand-ups, if you tell a really famous guy you love his work or whatever, they don't want to be liked.

It's like going back to high school. You can't like the guy. If you like the guy, he thinks you're a loser. He's a loser. Do you know what I mean? But they can't have love a lot of times. It comes off like thirsty. And, you know, and I'm, by the way,

my whole life I've been insecure about being annoying. And then I'm doing annoying things. I'm like, just stop being annoying. You know what I mean? It's like I used to go up to people like, oh, I'm such a fan of this, that, and the other. Now I don't. My family is still like that. Mm-hmm.

Okay. Like my sister saw Paul Rust from the Netflix show Love, the Judd Apatow show, love, the Judd-Aptow show, love maybe 10 years ago. She's like, Paul Rust is at a restaurant. Okay. That's very niche, by the way. Yeah, very niche, okay. I know because I like the show. Yeah, and she'll go, she'll go niche on anything.

Like, big, okay, and she's like, I'm being chill. I'm being chill. Seconds later, I'll get 16 pictures of her with Paul West. Like, I'm being chill. So in the beginning, say I got a five-minute spot at the Just for Lafs Festival, which is a big comedy festival. My brothers would call him, like, can I get 16 tickets? Jeff Ross is going to be there.

My friend's one of us like, 16 tickets is an insane amount. And my brothers used to come and be like, could you get a picture of me and Jeff Ross? And it's like, I'm working the show. And I'm like, and he's like, but now. I bring them and I let them enjoy. You don't give them any limit. No, go up. Go up to anyone.

As long as it's not you doing it. I just don't care. It's my family. What can I say? There's nothing to say. This is how they are. I wish I get, I don't have to explain for them anymore.

But the Steve Carell thing was one of those gray areas again where I'm now working as an actor on Steve Carell's big new show. Okay. And, you know, we're sitting on those actors. director chairs, you know. And my brother Schmulli is just poke is just in my ear. Like,

have you, have you told Steve Carell? It's like, well, did you mention the office? It's like, no, I'm not going to, like, he knows about the office, but they just want me to say. So finally, like the last day of shooting, I'm like, do I care more about Steve Carell or do I care more about making my brother Schmully happy? Yeah.

So I had to pick Schmully and it can, and I don't want to do this. And I'm like, My brother Shmoli loved you in the office. And he's like, thanks. And finally, my brother called, did you mention the office? I said, I mentioned the office. He goes, ah, that's fantastic. That's fantastic.

Like, it just makes nothing good happens to these people. Why can't I? Like, we're out here having these luxurious lives. And it's amazing. Like, my brother was in construction for 15 years. My sister's a social worker. Yeah. doing the work, you know.

So when I bring her to something, I brought her to some premiere. I said, say hi to whoever. She said, Brett Goldson is so hot. I said, go up to him. I just, I care more about my family. Yeah. In the, you know, in the beginning, it was too embarrassing. But now that I have a little bit more confidence and comfort and being here that I can be here and I should be here, I don't, I let them enjoy now.

Are they, well, it sounds like from the stories, but how. how geeked out are they over your life? Like, can they believe it? Yes, we all believe it. You all, like, they knew, did your family kind of think you were going to be in the biz growing up? I'm not sure, but they, we all were like, well, why not us? Yeah. So why not?

What's so special? You know, that's how my siblings are. We just, they've seen the work. They've seen us, you know, like, we're all extremely hardworking in our respective, respective fields too, and we've seen other people make it, like my sister Chaya in sales, for instance. Like, she started working at 16 and, you know, she is married and bought a house. Like, there was so many making it's that we saw from, so I don't know. I just feel like we're all so stoked. Did any of them have a dream like yours, like to be in entertainment? I think we all dream to some extent. And that's why

it's amazing to share it with them because they didn't get to dream. You know, I'm seven, born, I have six older, you know, my sister, Chaya, for instance, didn't have an older sister that she, she had to just, like, move out at 15, 16, work at the grocery store, work in sales, like, she had so many things that she was just not, she never got to dream. So bringing her to the Emmys, you brought her, you know, was so fun because a, so I lose my category. Okay, as soon as, first of all, we wake up in the morning. It's Chai and me. We got a hotel.

I got her the hair and makeup because I don't use that. So I use my budget on her. I was going to ask you if you do glam. I do my own glam. As you can imagine. So I gave it to my sister. And we wake up in the morning and we're like, it's a shoe in. Who's it?

Who else is? Like, there's no one else to even win this. She's like, like, we're thinking we already won the Emmy. We woke up, we'll have a mimosa. She's like, hi. I was like, she's a shoe in. First of all, the category is Olivia Coleman. It's like me.

It's literally like Zoe Kravitz. It's like, okay. And we're like, she's like, who's even in this category? Like, you know, like we're like, we think we want it. Okay. I love it. Suddenly our category's up first. It was supposed to be mid-show, but they're like,

they're doing some of the acting categories first just to start it off of the bang. Before they get into the technical sound engineering, that thought nothing wrong. So we're up. We're sitting front row. There's like celebs, you know, beyond. We're sitting there. And I lose immediately. Chaya's like, we don't need this shit.

Okay, she walks me out. She's like, fuck this. We don't need this shit. You could see us on camera. We're like, no. You literally leave. The worst sore losers you can imagine. Okay.

Okay. Wait, weren't you scared it? The cameras would pick it up? No, my sister told me we were leaving. We're leaving. My big sister's just like, we're getting out of here. I'm like, okay, we're leaving. Like, who am I to say my sister?

Wait, you left. We left. You didn't stay for the rest of the night. Well, 10 minutes into the ceremony I lose. We're gone. Okay. You go to the back. They're like, whoa, well, Rob, you can't leave.

You're presenting the cinematography categories. I'm like a presenter also. I said, no, no, no. My circumstances have changed. I don't want to present anymore, you know. Stop. Yeah, I don't want to present. You know, I thought I'd go up there with Miami.

Da, da, who cares? Cinematography. Great. You know? I, we just, I said, my circumstances have changed. She said, we're leaving. We don't need this shit. I came all the way from Arizona to do this.

She's horrified. She spent $400 on the top. The hotel isn't what it said it would be. We're out. Then they convince us. They get her, they get her a dry. So we have to say,

okay, so we get there and they want me to go on the teleprompter and say, they have all this stuff. I said, the one thing I know, I'm not saying whatever the hell's on there. I have no clue what they want me to say on this.

I'm not reading a promter. A, I don't even know how to follow the prompter. And, you know, I do find it funny that so many talk shows and things like this and award shows use prompters. It's like maybe a talk show should have somebody who knows how to talk.

Like, you know what I mean? It's like, that's like that's our podcast. It's like you're such a good, just talker. Thank you. Like, it's like you don't have a prompt. Like you're just. But I've noticed that celebs mess the promter up all the time at award shows. And they make fun of it.

And that kind of becomes a vibe of the night of like, can I work the prompt? Can I work the promptor? So I already know I'm not saying nothing. So I get up there. Because I, and I get up there. I go, I lost. There's nothing to say.

And the whole audience was, was with me because it was like, listen, it's not the most becoming behavior to be a sore loser. But I believe when you're sad, be sad. When you're happy, be happy. I'm not going to like pretend. Like, it's like when I'm sad, I like radio head. I like sad music. Like I lean into sad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I lean into happy. I lean into whatever feelings I'm having. I need to go watch your reaction when the winner is announced. They cut so, but you'll see, I think still that reaction is in it. But I get up there. I'm like, it's, you know, there's nothing to say. I said, and it's criminal, frankly, that they have me presenting after such a loss.

I have to hold somebody else's Emmy. It's like, it's like masochistic. It's like, this could have been mine. Like I got to. And then I'm bringing up the category. I'm like, you know what? Chaya, you want to present at the Emmys? So my sister's, I said, I brought my sister in from Arizona.

She got her hair. I said, look how I make her show everyone. People agree. She looks. Kristen's like she looks beautiful. I said, Chaya, why don't you present the cinematat for you? Why? And the security's like, you know, and I'm like, what?

You're going to let Will Smith, he can walk, whatever state she wants, my sister all the way in from Arizona, can't present an Emmy. And she did amazing with me. And we turned that frown upside down and presenting with my sister me the whole night. Like everything, it was just so fun in the end. And for her. And for her, it's like we all get to share in each other's dreams.

That's so sweet. And the fact that you're 10 and it sounds like you're, are you guys more or less equally close? Yeah, I'm close to about six of them. There's always an ebb and flow. It's like the Kardashians, but foreign Jewish. There's like different like dramas and this person is not talking about and should I meddle, should I not meddle.

I'm a good family meddler if two people are fighting. They call you. I will slow and steady get them back. Yeah. You're not a fighter. Like you don't do like get mad about stuff, drama. If they don't invite you if they're hanging out doing something. No, no, no, and I'd rather not.

The less we have to do, the better, because there is so much going on all the time. But, yeah, one of my little sisters, Devorah, she's a terrible meddler. Like, she'll make it worse. Yeah. She'd be like, you know, like, you know, like, I'm very. And does your mom get in it? No, my mother is like, it's funny. Like, my parents aren't, I don't have any relationship with my father, but my, my mother is Don La Loon.

Like, in French, it's like, she's in the moon. Like she's in the class. My mother is autistic beyond. She is, my mother speaks to all of her children. And she has no, she never gets involved. She never does, huh? No. And she's always been like, yeah, but we're not as close.

Like my mother is really a meat and potatoes mother. Like you're going to be fed. You're going to be housed, you know, and you're going to be educated. Like, that's it. You know, she didn't do any of the emotional bandwidth was certainly not there. So where did you? where did you find it with your siblings? Yeah, it's like it's very hard to describe.

You know, I think to compare the differences between a nuclear family of maybe two kids, two parents to 10 kids. Yeah. And two parents and then from two parents to my mother, Justin and my great-uncle Eddie, I think there's a lot of co-raising that goes on too, such that my little brother is not just my little brother. He's also my son. There are different.

the way that we are is very different. You know, my sister Chaya had her leg up with a tampon. I'm 10. Bush is out here. She's like, well, you're going to have to know. It's like, I guess today's the day I know. Like, you know, when you have, I taught my little brother how to potty train. I wouldn't recommend this, but I must have been five.

And he was slow. And my mother was freaking out that, well, he's not going to get into, he couldn't go to school. Right. You can't go if you're not. Mm-hmm. And you're like, I'll do it? No, she was just like freaking out. And I just, I put him in my underwear with strawberry shortcake underwear.

And I said, if you pish in my underwear, I will punch you. I will hate you. And it's terrible five years. But the abuse worked. And he was trained within two weeks. We had him in school. I said, ma, this kid will not be an accident. And he wore my underwear.

He was so afraid of me. But that's, you know, it's not great parenting. You know, the parentification isn't great for a lot of reasons, but it's also is great for some reasons. And you're Robbie and everyone's, well, you were, Rivka. Yeah. Is that still on your, like, official documents? Yeah, and what does it sound like when you hear it? Does it sound like you?

Rivka. Yeah, no, it sounds like somebody knows me from, like whenever people call me, you know, my high school friends call me, RIV, like, I can always denote where somebody knows. Oh, RIF is cute. me from, you know, like, Rifke is a kid. My family calls me Rifke. Yeah. Really?

Mm-hmm. So if Chaya's coming with you to the Emmys and everyone's like, Robbie, Robbie, and she's She'll say, Bobby. Oh, she'll understand the, okay. Yeah, yeah. And then Robbie just feels like me and, like, who I am. Like, I love Robbie and I also like, I like, I like, but it depends who, I wouldn't want a new person to call.

I was like, like. Yeah, that's right. You don't know me like that, you know. you know me like this, which I love all the parts of me. I just, it just, it denotes where they're coming from in my world. It's very sweet. You seem like such a like, sure person. Are you? Yeah. Like you know who you are vibes. Yeah, I'm always trying to be more me. Like I feel like, you know, it's hard to say what the point of life is or whatever, but I really feel like you need a life to know a life. I feel like God willing would get 120 years.

But should I even get 20, 120 years or 90 years or God willing, whatever years, I know that I will have needed every year, like to know my life. Like, like, I just think that the purpose maybe of life is you get one little model car and you got to get it through. You got to do the maintenance of it. You got to make sure it's still running. You got to make sure it's comfortable. is the AC working, your temperature, is the scene, you know, the scenery. You get one little car and you have to just get that there.

And as, and make it personalize it 100%. You can custom do it, anything you want. When did you feel like you really like became who you are now? Yeah, it's always, like, I think it was always there. Yeah. And then it got squashed. I think I was embarrassed a lot as a child. being poor and then being boyish and being loud and being annoying.

And I, you know, I was annoying even my own family. So, you know, my oldest sister thought I was annoying. Just shut up, you know. And then monetizing and using those things for a plus has been tremendous. It's fighting. It's just you have to get through the systems that are trying to make you the same. But I know a lot of people who want to be the same. And that works too.

But it's, I always have at the core been here, but it's just only getting more finessed and refined. I look back at the little kid's self of me when I was maybe eight, nine, ten. And I go, Rob, I'm trying to get you there. As soon I hear you, you know, she's impatient. I know, you don't even know what I'm up against with nepo's and rich and the connections. I am doing, you don't know what it is out here. as a grown-up. You can't imagine what I've done for us.

It's Michael, Jordan, levels of proportion. Like you're a hustler. Yeah, like what we have done is tremendous. Yeah. It's tremendous. And just getting as most me as possible. So you were saying before you don't do glam. No.

I do my own glam. Right. And the hairstyle. Yeah, I don't know how I landed on this. So I must know because I saw on your website, there was a different hairstyle. Right. I don't hate that one. No, that was like a middle.

Yeah. Yeah, I used to just let my hair go a little more wild. And then it just became easier to just like that was a very casual look for me. Yeah. And then it just became easier to like have one, like just not have to think if I'm going to be casual or not. It feels more practical to get it like out of your face. I don't know. You don't know.

I really, you know what? We used to have this Hebrew teacher, Moro Ragev, who had the same buffon hair for years. And you could, like, in our school, you could see, like, all the class pictures from, like, the 70s or something. And you could see this one teacher through the years with the same hairstyle.

And I'm like, I used to make fun of it. I used to think she's like, oh, my God. And I've become the person, the lady who has the same hairstyle. I don't know one of them. Well, you're good at it. I don't see any bumps. Is it fine?

Yeah, what do you use for the... I use whatever. I got it from. Supercuts. You go to Supercuts? I go to Supercuts. Because who even cares with my hair? It's in a bun. Like, it doesn't even... Yeah. How much does it cost now, Supercuts? 30? I go on Tuesdays. Yeah. It's like, well, I always, I tip 100%. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. Because what did I see? Oh, you don't believe in the tipping for the coffee? Yeah. Were you annoyed with that. And people are annoyed that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, when they see me tip now. I do tip. I think it is, I think employers should pay. their employees. It shouldn't be levied on the public. Yeah. Like, when did that happen? Yeah. And it shouldn't be up to, like, when I worked at a coffee shop, it shouldn't be up to me smiling. Like, just let me do my job. I don't have to flirt with you. So when you tip, people are like, but you said you don't tip. Yeah. And I'm like, you're missing the point. I think we should end tipping and, and make employers pay their employees. I agree. Why are we subsidizing them? It's kind of like at Walmart. They give people the amount of hours that are just below full-time.

So maybe it's 34 hours instead of 35, something like that. And that way they also qualify for welfare. So because you can't live on that. So they're working part-time jobs, McDonald's, and subsidizing by welfare. Who pays welfare, us? So it's a way for Walmart to get the public to pay their salaries. Yeah. It's criminal.

It's double-dipping. Let's do a few fun, internet, pop culture questions before you go. Of course. Most famous person in your phone you can't say Gabby. Adam Sandler. Wow. I know. That's recent.

Saw this, Sash. Damn. Well, we're getting hit from all over. Babe. All over. That's like the dream. Is he the dream for you? Like, was he?

I mean, I get, you know, the dream is, is me. You know, I don't know that there's a, there's a dream in a person. I think it's all of it. The dream is like we're getting to participate and do. this insane thing. But they're, yes, it's all full full circle. The David Spade so funny. All of these people are, you know, Leanne Morgan, just knowing my, you know, people who I revere is really nice. You love the Kardashians. I do. Who's your fave? I like Courtney. You do me too. Oh, really? I like Courtney, but, you know, and I love them all for different things.

of course. Like that's the thing. I think Courtney reminds me most of my sister Chaya. And so that's what I like about. Is she the oldest? Yeah. Okay.

She has the same energy. Yeah. And also just like in love and just yeah, like checked out sometimes like does what she wants. Doesn't what she wants. I think her style is great. I love Chloe. Obviously I think she'd be really fun Chloe.

And Kim is just, I mean, I met Kim very, very briefly. and I was, oh, this is when I get like my brothers, and this is why I have no chill. You want to say, like, I'm a huge fan. Yeah, because, like, the Kardashian is like a new level of fame. Like, when you're asking me, like, other comedians, I could imagine being in the, I know that seems egotistical, but it's like I am at comedy club so much that I've seen these people.

Yeah. It becomes, but somebody like Kardashian is out of my field. It's out of my, you know. So when I was at the Vanity Fair party, I found a diamond watch on the floor that had fallen. off someone. And I found this diamond watch and I'm like, I got to return it to security. And some people were like, finders keeper and Jimmy, Jimmy Kimmel was helping me, you know, find security. It's a diamond watch. I looked up the brand. It was a $60,000 watch that I just found.

And I get to the bathroom because they had security by the bathroom. Gabby goes to pee. And who comes out of the bathroom? Kim Kardashian. Wait, this is a Vanity Fair Oscar. Fancy. Yeah. I heard they weren't inviting so many people, guess who got the invite. And by the way, worth noting I got invited. Plus one. Plus one. So I brought Gab, obviously. Obviously.

Not that they wouldn't know that my plus one is Gabby, but it is worth noting. I got invited somehow. So I, and that was a very glitzy and fun party. I mean, Mick Jagger was there like ripping Sigs, 85, like he beat the system. Like he's really like having a time. He's got a whiskey and Sigs. I'm like, wow. Yeah.

He was agile. He looked good. looked great. Wow. 85 just ripping six. Love. Beat the fucking system. I was like, you know.

Him and Keith. I don't know how Keith is doing, but he's alive. They're kicking it. And they were like major drug addicts or whatever. So it's like you can't tell them nothing. No, none. And so Kim Kardashian comes out and she's like, oh, you found the watch. I'm like, yeah, I found, you know.

And I'm like, yeah. being too a little bit. Like, I don't know how to be around her, you know. And she was like, oh, we could give it to my security. I said, Kim, you have enough of these. We're not going to your security. We're going to give it to the museum's security, you know. Wait, she was trying to help the lost watch situation.

Yeah, she was like, you know, my security will help and, you know, they can give. That's sweet of her. No, she was so sweet. Yeah, she's so sweet. And I'm like trying to make hard jokes. And she's like, okay, whatever. So, Kim, you know, it's all because I'm just nervous. But thank you for trying to help.

Of course. And yeah, I like all of them. I love Chris. Gabby would not let me say hello to Chris. Why? Gab's like, Gab and I are a party. Like, Gab will sit alone and say hi to no one. Because she's embarrassed or because she doesn't give a shit.

She doesn't give a shit. About anyone. Anyone. That's cool. Okay. And I care a lot about everything. Yeah. If I'm at a party like this, I'm like, the understanding of such a party is everybody can say hi to

everybody. Yeah. You're on the Vanity Fair party. Nobody knows. everybody. They're putting a bunch of glitzy people together. The whole point is you could say hi. Is it fun, Robbie? It was very fun. It was very fun. Just because you know what it is. You know it's this type of party where, you know, no one's necessarily real friends. Some people are, some people are, some aren't. People can go up to each other. And there's some people who don't do that. Wait, so Gabby. But Gab walked around with me or whatever. The one person, and I already had so many interactions, I was like, I got to do Chris. And she was like, babe, I cannot. Because it also.

wouldn't have been a natural approach. I would have beeline. Like it wasn't like, like some of the other. You were all part of the same combo and you'd be like, oh, I'm saying. Like that she's all down for it. Like we're in the same combo and somebody's like, oh, Robbie, I saw you. I had a bunch of people who were huge going, you're so it's great when they're starting to do it to me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, oh, I saw your stand. Because they feel like they really know. Yeah. What's going on. So that's great. I would beeline cold. It's not. But you have the chutz but to do that. Yes. But, but. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But Only only, but for what reason? What do I get there? What would you say? Nothing. I'm a huge fan. That's why. It's insane.

She's totally right to pull me back when it's appropriate. Like, if she just let me run feral at one of those parts, it wouldn't be good. But I love that it's like, just looking at you both, you would think like you're more chill about that kind of environment. And maybe you would have to stop Gabby from one and go up to the Kardashians. So it's funny that it's the other way around. Oh, she doesn't give a shit. And I just want to call my family. Like, I saw this person.

I met this person. And you'll never believe who. And I'm like, oh, my God. My brother's like, Mariana. She saw Nicole Kidman. Mariana. You know, I just want it for the tea the next day. Like who, like, I just don't give the shit.

You like the tea. Yeah, but to relay this information. Yeah. On. No, that's so funny. Like, it's just once it's that night, if it's not that night, I don't care. Yeah. But the whole point of that night was, you know, walking around.

around and saying hello to people. And a bunch of people did it to me, and I don't mind at all. When people come up to you and say, huge fan. Yeah, like, especially they're a, like, you know, it was like a Chris Pine or I forget his name, but he's a massive movie star.

He's like, your stand-up or Rob Pattinson loves my stand-up. Robert Pattinson came up to you? Yes. Stop. And by the way, his new movie, the drama, they're not, I thought it was really good. I didn't see it. Gab and I saw it. We really liked it.

You did. So he came up to you at Vanity Fair. Yeah, loved the special. So that, I'm not like, whoop? Like, you know what I mean? So now I'm hearing it the other way, I go, maybe it's not so bad. Maybe I should start going up to people more. No, the B-line is on is, the B-line is, then you're just there.

I know. But it's also, there's something to say about regretting, not seizing an opportunity. You know what I mean? Right, right. Like, what would I, you know, not that you regret the Chris Jenner thing, you'll probably run into her again. I have one regret for years and years ago. Joan Rivers. And that's a regret you can't undo.

Joan Rivers, when I had just started stand-up and at the same time discovered Joan Rivers, which is, again, I didn't grow up thinking stand-up was anything. I didn't even know what it was. And getting into Joan Rose, my sister showed me the movie, her movie, loved it. And I was maybe two years in stand-up. I was really into it. And so this movie was like perfect. And she was coming to the festival in Montreal. And I message, I emailed the head of the festival.

It was like, you don't know me yet, but you will. Like, chutzpah beyond. Yeah. You know, like, because once I'm in, I'm 100, I'm like, either I'm going all the way, like, for love or money, this is what I do. Whether it worked out or it didn't. For lover money. Wait, I love that line.

Yeah. For love or money, this is. And I got, my friend Drucker always says that line, but I love that line. I use it for everything now. Yeah, for love or money. For love or money. This is what I do. Yeah.

This is how I toil. This is just what I do. You know, whether it had to, you know, I could have been in the one mattress. I would have still been doing this or living a beautiful life that I do with Gab. Either way, this is just what I do. So years or so, I message him. I said, you don't know me yet, but you will. Joan Rivers is coming.

It's sold out. Any way I can see. And he said, I'll do you one better. Why don't you come at three o'clock, the day of the show. you'll get to see the rehearsal and the show. So I go there, downtown Montreal, and I go in the big auditorium. Well, before I even go to the dog,

I walk through the back, she's in her makeup chair. She's, nobody's there, just her makeup artist. She's in the makeup chair. I could have said hello, but this is when I didn't even have, I didn't, for some reason, played it cool then. Yeah. Like when I play it cool and when I don't,

it's like, I didn't say anything. I was just like, oh, she's doing her makeup. She's doing her thing. See, that would have been a time not to be cool. That's the B-Line, Jimmy, you know. But you got to see her. Yeah, and you know what? She did say one thing.

She was on stage at the rehearsal. Massive auditorium. And there was only tech people, me sitting there with my girlfriend at the time. And she was kind of sweeping the stage and making sure it was perfect. And she said, what's this? Lesbians? And that's it. And that's it.

Yeah. But I wish I had B-line. didn't done the picture. There's not many people that I would say that way. Yeah. But that would have been a fun one. That would have been. Well, sorry for taking more of your time than intended. No, not at all. I went over, over, over, and thank you for being here. Thank you. It was so nice to get to know you more. I adore you. I adore you. Great interviewer. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you guys so much for listening to this episode of Not Skinny, but Not Fat. Follow me on Instagram at Not Skinny but Not Fat. Subscribe to the podcast. We don't miss any episodes. Rate the podcast that you love so much on Apple Podcast and write a little review.

If you tell me you did, I'll give you a big virtual smoocheroo. Thank you guys so much for listening, and I'll see you next Tuesday. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.