Not Skinny But Not Fat - SARAH HYLAND! Her new pod, fiancé Wells Adams, and health scares

Episode Date: February 22, 2022

So excited to have Modern Family star, and new podcast narrator, Sarah Hyland on the podcast! We discuss how she met fiancée and bachelor nation star Wells Adams, her show Bone Marry Bury, what we can expect to see her in next, why she lives in LA, and what it’s like to have a family member donate an organ to save your life. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a dear media production. This is Amanda Hirsch from the Not Skinny but Not Fat podcast. You might know me from Not Skinny Bonifah on Instagram where I spend my time talking about reality TV, celebrities, everything happening, and pop culture. I also talk to some of our favorite celebs and reality TV stars. We talk about what's going on. Tune in every Tuesday and just feel like you're talking about your best friends in your living room. I'm so happy you're here, Sarah.

First of all, what an amazing excuse to meet you is that you're starting a podcast. It's pretty cool. So exciting. Did you ever think you were going to enter into the podcasting world? And if so, did you think that it would be in this way? Because this is kind of a new format. right so for you guys listening sarah highland you guys know her an actress we love modern family i'm a huge huge fan i love you in wells i'm a huge bachelor nation nerd so i ship ship you guys

and then i'm going to hound you on questions about like when's the wedding when is the wedding we want to know but but i'm so excited because you're joining the dear media family with a new podcast but it's not your typical like talking shit to the microphone, this is actually telling a story. So tell us a little bit about that, Sarah. Yeah, I really, I think I never really saw myself as having a podcast. I think there are people that are better at it than I, you know, be at you, my fiancee. Like, I will go on his podcast if I'm like home and bored and have nothing else to do. And I'm like, I would love to talk shit about the bachelor, let's do it. But that's what really drew me in with this project of Bone Mary

Barry because it's it's almost like an audio book, but a podcast. Does that make sense? It makes total sense. And I mean, you guys probably could like a movie but a podcast. You guys could add one and one together. But this is the nice way of saying fuck Mary kill, basically. It's like the PG non. I always, whatever I do like a fuck Mary kill. I'm always like, K, like, I always feel bad, like, killing people, you know? Oh, real? I'm not. I'm not, I'm not mad about murder.

That sounds horrible, but, you know. You're like, in the, in the, I'm like, with a knife. I go clue on them. I'm like, with the wrench in the library. But I'm assuming, so I'm assuming you guys had to kind of like make it more PG. So bone, Mary Berry, which has like a really nice ring to it. and you're also executive producing it. Yeah.

It's, I just really love that Dear Media is such an amazing advocate for women. Dear Media amplifies women's voices, entrepreneurial and the comedy world, health, wellness space. So why not take it to a fictional podcast land with a shit show that is Allie, that is the voice that I voice. So I really loved that aspect of it as well. I am all for women-sporting women. And it's just such a fun.

It's fun. And Harvey Gien was already attached, and I love him. I've known him for years, and we've never worked together before. And I was like, even though he was in Canada in a recording booth, and I was in a recording booth at L.A., it was just so much fun to spend so many hours in a booth internationally with each other and just fuck around and have fun and you know i mean we were given a lot of space to improv and harvey and i were able to really get this groove of being able to get off the page

for like a full five minutes of just us improvving going back and forth and somehow seamlessly falling back into the scene again we're able to like wrap it back up and and lasso the cow. I don't know. I'm not a cowboy. But it's still, it was just so much fun. So I really loved being a part of it.

And I think it's a really cool future for podcast. I think it's a really cool space. So what is it? So it's about this girl, Ali, and she's kind of a shit show. And she, what, she goes out to a party and she has to, like, decide between the dudes. Yeah.

So Ali has, like, hit the trifecta of terrible. she's lost her job. She's been evicted. She's been dumped. And it is the year 2020. And she's like, this is going to be my year. I feel like we've all felt like that. I definitely felt like that in 2020. And then March hit me like a, hit me along with the rest of the world like a semi. And so every year, everyone's like, this is going to be my year. So she's like, I'm going to this party. Her and Gaybar, voiced by Harvey Bion, and their best friends, unbeknownst to Allie, he, he's, is the future teller narrative of the show and he says that at this party unbeknownst to Ali she will end up owning, burying and marrying three different people that are at this

party so it's six episodes with an epilogue and it'll be really fun for the listeners to be able to guess like well who is she going to marry who's going to die who is she going a bone. And I think it'll be like a fun little kind of game that the listeners will be able to play along with. Okay. So y'all knew if you followed me when I gave birth to Noah, well, after I gave birth, postpartum hair loss is real. You hear about it. You read about it. You're like, and then you see a huge clump of hair in your hand. It is very weird. 30 million women are impacted by a weekend or thinning hair. If you're among them, know that you're not alone. And there is a solution.

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It was three years. Oh, it was three years. So that's not bad. It wasn't the way. No, it wasn't bad at all. I was 18 and I'm pretty sure in the pilot, Claire said something like about Dillon, like a senior. She's only 15 or something like that. So I'm pretty sure she was 15 in the pilot.

Yeah, like three years. I've definitely played younger than three. I was like a nine-year-old playing like a four or five-year-old. Oh my God, no. You've been acting since you were like a baby. Yeah, it was four. Four. And you grew up in New York City, which like, do you miss it?

We're freezing right now. Do you miss it? I mean, it's 90 degrees in L.A. today. It's climate change is really, you know, what's happening. It's never built like this before. I love New York City. I love the city. it is my first true love.

I just know that I don't have the money to be able to live in what I want to live in in New York City. Yeah, isn't it wild? Like, I'll watch Architectural Digest. I love seeing, like, celebrity homes. And even, like, the rich celebrities that they show their apartments in New York are a little bit sad.

Like, even the richest fucking people are like, here's my, here's my hallway. and there's like there's no width to the hallway and like the kitchen is in the living room and it makes me feel better about myself because I'm like, okay. Like, you know, and they'll have like a fabulous brownstone, but it has no view. It's like facing a brick wall. So like you can't have it all in New York. Like even if you're, you know, doing well for yourself, you can't really live like a king unless you're like Beyonce. Yeah. Or like Charlotte, you know, like from sex in the city. Like the just like that, I see those apartments.

I'm like, what is going on? These places exist in New York. Wait, were you not shook? I grew up in a 300 square foot apartment with a tub in the kitchen. So I'm like, I've done this small apartment thing. I did that for a very long time. I'm good to live at a house now. Wait, were you shook?

Do you watch them just like that, I'm assuming? I did. Were you shook? Like, one of the scenes that took me back the most was like when we got to see the entrance to Carrie's Brownstone. like, wait, we've never seen this first. Oh, yeah. And then she walks up with the neighbor and everything. Yeah. I'm like, wait, hold up. Give us a minute to like understand where we are. We're inside the brownstone. but we've never seen this before in any of any of the seasons of sex on the city. Or am I just a freak?

You're like, no bitch. Didn't notice that. Don't care. No. I mean, now that you, now that you brought it up, I totally, I completely agree. It's very, it's like, Okay, so we see the entrance to the brownstone at a self-way for the first time. The first fucking time. And also, I mean, obviously, brownstones are so fucking expensive. And Carrie's been like, you know, in the trenches, like in this fabulous brownstone. Are you, how are you feeling about it just like that? Like, were you, most of the world has so much criticism. I personally felt like, I know, I get what people are saying.

But I'm just happy to see them. I am very happy to see them. I have, of course, like my thoughts as a fan and stuff, but I also am not in a place to criticize anyone. Like, would I be able to do that? No, I wouldn't be able to do that. I wouldn't be able to do that. I wouldn't be able to write all those episodes and direct and, like, do all that. No, I wouldn't be able to do that. So I think it's kind of the same way. If only people could think like you, if only people, if only people, if only people that judge things could first ask themselves, but could I, like, wouldn't that be a beautiful world?

Like, people just, you know, blurt shit out without ever taking a second, you know, thought. And you're like, I thought about it. I was like, I can't write these episodes. I probably couldn't. So I'm not going to say, I mean, I wish everyone was like you. I mean, like publicly I'm like that. I mean, I probably definitely have different conversations with my best friends. And by probably definitely me, I mean, that.

I have, but I just, you know, publicly, like, I'm not about to criticize anything. Like, I was really upset with everybody criticizing the last season of Game of Thrones. I was like, who are you? These people spent how many months in, like, a freezing cold filming one episode. They, that, like, the night battle thing with the Night King and stuff. They were there for months filming that episode. And I'm like, who are you? Well, you also have that perspective, because,

you're an actress. So you know, like, people should think, you know, a little bit. We all know now that it's like, it's hard to shoot a show. You shoot the scene a thousand times. Like, what were the days like on Modern Family? Were they super long? Oh, easy, breezy. Oh, really? Like, people can judge all they want on that because we were like in and out. Oh, my God. That sounds like such a dream. Do you miss it now that it's, it's been over for almost two years? two years now yeah i think what is the date we have been almost wrapped filming almost two years like closer to the end of the month we wrapped finished filming two years ago so i miss i miss our

casting crew a lot i i loved them so much and i do know i'm never going to i mean knock on what Like, who knows? Like, throw it out there. I would love to have another job like that again, where it's so easy with everybody. And it's also loving and collaborative and stuff. So I do miss that. But I mean, you know, things are not as easy to shoot as modern family.

And I do know that. And so that is so fun to hear because it makes me feel like watching it and it was so fun. It's so great to know that you guys were having fun on the set at the same time. Also, your character was. was such a probably fun character to play. Like, you got to play, like, a little bitchy, like, sassy, hot, popular teen.

Like, how fun was that? Yeah. I mean, I got to, you know, kind of make fun of the girls that are in, like, in high school. Did you ever, did it ever stay with you the way, like, method actors do? And you came home and you were, like, still being a little bitch? I don't know. You probably have to ask, like, ex-partners of mine. I probably would not have the wherewithal for that to really notice.

But no, I think there have definitely been times where I've said something. And I've been like, holy shit that I just pulled a hailing. How dare I say something so dumb. Right. I'm so sorry. I apologize. Do you keep in touch with the rest of the cast? Yeah.

Julie and I have like actually been talking all week. Yeah. So her and I probably see Jesse Tyler Ferguson and his husband Justin the most. Yeah. Talk to Todd. Yeah, we all keep in touch. We have like a group chat. A group chat.

A group text chain. Yeah. Do you see like a reboot happening a la Dexter, a la just like that? Like could you see that happening? Friends, had a reunion even? I mean, maybe we would do a reunion, but not for like, a very long time. And I don't want to imagine a world without Ed O'Neill, not to make this like morbid, but I did say I'm fine to like kill people and fuck married kill. So I'm a pretty

morbid person. So I don't want to imagine a world without Ed O'Neill, but I have no idea. That's not to me. Probably, I would probably do a reunion more than a reboot. More than a reboot. And then so, you know, we were all watching modern fans. family all, you know, all the time when it was on. And then I remember finding out for the first time about, you know, your health struggles and legit being shocked. Like I remember I was with my sister and I was like, how? Like, how didn't we know and how did she not look like she was sick? Oh my God. That is the largest jug of water. That is larger than Chloe Kardashians that she like says to finish. And I ordered from Amazon and returned it. What is that? How many leaders? Like, how many mega liters? The gallon? Oh, that's the gallon challenge? It just looks bigger because I'm small.

No, it's big. It's also big. It's also big. But I just, I have a very small head. So it probably just looks bigger. I'm sure Chloe Kardashian told you to get a gallon. I just. She did.

So weird. I think you started talking about health problems. And I was like, I should be drinking. I have to drink, like, a lot of water and stuff. So I just. Oh, it was like in your head. What reminded me of my jug? Just like, yeah, like Pavlov dog stuff.

I was like, oh, I heard that word and now I need to drink water. How are you doing with the gallon challenge? Are you getting it? You're finishing it? Yeah. Oh, wow. Good for you. I don't even do gallon challenges.

It's just I try to drink as much water in a day. At least two to three liters, I've got more. That's amazing. Okay, as y'all knew, this episode is being aired. am away. And you know what? I never forget to pack when I go away and what's always in my closet is shapewear. And the shapeware I use is honey love. I just think shapeware can have that extra boost of confidence sometimes that you need and can sometimes make clothes look their best. And I think the very idea of shapeware needs to be changed. It's not to like squish your

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I don't remember when it was exactly that you kind of opened up about it. I opened up about it a few times, maybe after the first transplant, probably. And it took me a while. I didn't want to be, you know, I was 21. I didn't want to be that like milk carton kid of, you know, like, Sarah Highland's a kidney transplant chick. And that's really like all I was in people's eyes. So I very much tried to stay away from that as much as possible.

I feel you. And then, because I remember it was a very romantic story that you were telling about when you met Wells, Wells Adams, he was on Jojo's season of The Bachelor. Like you met him. Where did you guys meet? We connected online originally. Instagram online? Twitter. Oh, you guys are so intellectual. That's like, it's like for the intellectuals out there. Yeah. Yeah. So wait, direct messages on Twitter or like adding on Twitter? Well, I had added him. I used to, before him and I started dating, I used to talk a lot of shit about The Bachelor on Twitter in a fan type way.

Like that was me talking shit about someone the same way that people talking or shit about just like that. You know, I was like, I have no filter when it comes to this. I don't know anything about reality TV. So I don't know what they're going through. And I don't know if this is real or not, but like, these are my thoughts, blah. And so I would always make jokes and everything. And I think it was like the Mentel All episode.

And Wells was talking about Chad. And he referenced him as he who must not be named as well as piggy, like from Lord of the Flies. And I was just like, hey, I was rooting for this dude because I was like, he's like the hot nerd DJ. Like, get it, Jojo. Like I told my friends that were. in like a Bachelor Fantasy League kind of thing. I was like, Coatwell's on it.

I love him. Not thinking anything of it. And then when I saw that he was like, like he read, he knows how to read. Yeah. I was like, a 30-year-old man that had the job

and knows how to read. Are you kidding me? And so I just wrote like, I don't know, made a joke like something along the line who like didn't know that bachelor contestants could read at Wells.

Adams hashtag men who read are hot like just as a joke I wasn't even like putting myself out there by any means I wasn't like come get me he DM'd me after that and then we kind of were just talking on Twitter I think and it definitely started on Twitter and then it things got like kind of weird and I thought that I ghosted him but we actually ended up ghosting each other because he thought I was in a relationship at the time, but it just wasn't public that it was like a whole thing. And then I ended up getting back together with someone. And then like a year later, it came out that it was like I was single and he had been named the bartender, a Bachelor in Paradise, still not trying or like shooting my shot

or anything, but I tweeted like, Wells Adams being the bartender's like the greatest thing. I was just like a big band of his. I thought it was so dope. Then he, like, treated me being like, I'll come down, I'll make you a margarita and stuff. And then he DM me saying, like, next time I'm in L.A., she want to go out for drinks and tacos. And I was like, wait, why? Where was he living at the time? He was in Nashville. Oh, Nashville. He was a Bachelor Hub. That's like a Bachelor Hub. He's like O.G. pre-Bachelor Nashville Hub. We'll give him the credit. They will give him the, yeah. He was living in East Nashville before it was cool.

Denise Nashville. Radio DJ there and everything. He had like a morning show at the age of like 25. Like who overachiever? I remember it was so weird when we were watching the season. I felt like collectively all of us like we saw that Jojo's hot, Wells is hot. For some reason, they're not hot together. Like there's not, they didn't have like, remember, that was the thing.

It was like they couldn't. It was like brother's sister vibes. It was so funny. Like I'm literally having flashbacks of them. I'm like, I don't know if it was like a trampoline. or some shit. It was like the pool, like in the air.

Yeah. And it was like, it is not. And they like, kind of like leaned over and kissed like that. It was like, it was so awkward.

But Sarah, do you know what it's bringing me back to? It's making me sad because I feel like it was so much better back then. Like I remember actually like lolling at that part. You know,

I remember thinking it was like funny and awkward and like feeling bad for Wells and like feeling. And now it's like, I mean, it's not it. Or it's got, I'm cruel, to be honest.

Cruel. Yeah. They're focusing a lot on, I mean, it's been five, six episodes of Chenet, like, you know, and the previews, I'm like, please be done. And the previews are still Shenanae. But okay, I want to get back to your story. So, so he's like tacos and margarita.

I'm very long-winded. So he's like, so I could talk for hours. So he's like, drink some tacos. And I was like, yeah, sure. And he was like, wait, really? These ghosts. No. Spirits. Sarah, we need to get you better fitting, like, you need smaller arms.

It's literally everything. Are these AirPods? Yeah. I'm telling you. These are like the AirPods pros. Yeah, no, it's just they're trying to mess with me. I'm in my office, which is also my rich room and stuff. So they're the most doctors in here.

Sorry about that. Wait, rich room as in short for ritual. Which. Oh. But also ritual. Oh, okay. I want to hear about that. So I was like, yeah.

sure, I'll go out and get tacos and drinks with you. And he was like, wait, really? And I was like, yeah. And he's like, oh, okay. And yeah, so we just started DMing a lot, which it's so fucking millennial and silly. But it started as DM, moved to text messages. Tax messages moved to voice memos. And then that moved to a FaceTime.

Ooh, FaceTime is serious. Serious. But we had this whole thing of like, you know, I, he, unbeknownst to him, I was scheduled, I was on dialysis and I was scheduled to get a kidney transplant on the 19th of September. This was the beginning of September. This was the second, the second transplant. The second one, yeah, at 2017. And so a week before my transplant, he didn't know anything.

And I told him, I was like, hey, so like in a week, I'm going to be going through some things. So this can't happen while I'm going through that. So if you're not here out in LA by the end of the week, you probably, like, this should probably like quit. And he was like, don't worry. Everything always works out for me. And I was like, okay, whatever. And then next morning, he was like, I'm going to be in LA this weekend. Told you everything worked out for me. I thought he, like, told his people to find something in LA to get him to. So, that he could do something to see me. And no, Wells is just that type of guy

where, like, everything works out for him. Well, knock on what? Knock on what? Knock on what? So, I mean, best far, look at him now. So he, uh, came to L.A. And I, I threw him into the, the shark's den. I took him to the pre-M.A. party, the night before party,

which is like, no media or anything like that. So everyone in their mom goes to. and he was just dealing with all these people that I've known since I was 18 years old and knowing me and throughout all of my relationships and knowing my health stuff and they're these crazy famous people and they're like oh so who are you what are your it's like kind of meeting the parents on a first date but it's like you know the people from stranger things wait so this party this crazy party was how many days before you had to go into surgery?

It was a Saturday. I met transplant on Tuesday. How wild. That's what I'm saying. Like, I just feel like it's so wild that like you can see somebody like you all glowned up,

you know, at this crazy celebrity-filled Hollywood party, yet you're dealing with something so insane. Like... Yeah, that was a crazy week. I've actually never thought about it before. And well, and being with him. So aside from the tacos,

in Margarita. This was like the second time you're physically together and you bring him to that party. First time. First time. Oh, you didn't end up going to tacos in Margarita. No. It was the first time that we were physically together. I'd thrown into the lion's den and then the next day I had to go to the Emmys and had to go. Yeah. I got to. The privilege. Somebody scheduled something annoying on my calendar. Got to go to the Emmys, went to my, like, due diligence after parties to, like, be with the bosses and stuff like that. And then I skipped all the rest of the after parties.

And I met up with him at his hotel and we, like, stayed up late talking. And then I was like, hey, like, got to go home. I got work at 6 o'clock in the morning. And I told him that weekend about the kidney transplant and everything. I was like, I can't do this over the phone. Like, I need to tell you in person. And what was his reaction like? His initial reaction was like,

it's well. So he wanted to make a joke, he makes a joke out of something when he's uncomfortable. And it's like, I think he said something to the effect of like, so if it doesn't take, can your brother take it back?

I'm, yeah. He asked for it back anytime and I was like, it doesn't work that way. He was like, oh, shit. Wait, so for people listening that don't know, Sarah, your first transplant, your dad donated, right? Yes. And then that after time, your body rejected.

And now your brother did. And then my brother. Wow. Do you have to be a match with a kidney or something or no, anybody can donate? Yeah. Oh, you do. I mean, anybody can. It's always best with family because you know that family will, you know, at least with

a parent you have half their DNA with the sibling, you have. Probably even more than half because it's both parents and stuff. It's like something weird with that. But not only do you have to be like a blood match, you also, there's a whole list of criteria. It's your brother or older or younger. He's younger. He just turned 27.

So he's like four or five years younger than me. But it's like a whole big thing. You have to like go through a bunch of testing to make sure that you're even healthy enough to that you would be able to withstand this as, as well as the kidney being healthy enough. Like my mom the first time around was supposed to donate. And that's how we found out that she had breast cancer was because she was going through the health screening. So it's a crazy thing. Did you, I'm just like thinking about, you know, my sisters and I so catty all the time, you know, always. And then like if something

big like this comes, it's like, did he offer or did you have to ask him? He offered. He offered. yeah it was kind of like when I went into rejection it was kind of just like unknown thing with the family I was hesitant at first but yeah that's is it does it feel at all like something hanging over like he saved my life or because you're you know siblings and I just wonder like how internally someone like feels about that like do you feel indebted to him forever can you still tell him to fuck off and he'll be like I gave you a I still tell him to fuck off. He's my little brother. I mean, like, when I, when I find myself telling him to fuck off a little bit too much, I'm like, wait, pull it back a little bit, Sarah, like stop, stopping, or stopping so hard on him for something that you know that he would be able to, you know, like things like that. But it definitely adds another layer to already the complicated relationship that siblings are. yeah and wow first of all you're just you know like when i was reading about that and and

hearing you speak about it's like i got so emotional again because it just came through like how brave you are and i was like i it felt like i could never like i could never be that resilient that brave like you're it's really i'm telling you i'm telling you i think a lot of people i think that like people tell people they're brave like for like posing in a bikini

like this is brave you know what I mean yeah that's that's very true but I also think it is brave to pose a bikini like if someone

asked me to pose in a bikini right now like fuck off hell no you're gonna give me $50 million dollars oh my God

if you're not going to give me a certain amount of money but I would be I would call myself brave to do that I just don't think

I think people underestimate themselves when it comes to the resilience of something like that. I think when it comes to life and death, there are really only two roads you go down. And one is brave and resilient. And the other one is kind of a black hole, so to speak. Women, listen up shaving. It hasn't always been a positive experience, has it?

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So it's mybilly.com slash not skinny. That's my-billy.com slash not skinny. Did you ever have the feeling of like, why me? Like, why do I deserve the shit? Like, fuck, yeah. I mean, everybody has a why me every day, even if they're completely healthy. Like, I miss the bus and I'm like, why me? You know? Yeah, everyone. Everyone has that. You know. And then. You stub your toe and you're like, why me? Yeah. They're out of the original skinny pop and they only have the cheddar flavor. And you're like, no. Everything happens to me. But that's a thing. It's like, I'm sure so many people and I could see it getting a

annoying, you know, people being like, oh, it puts things in perspective and, you know, like, yes and no. Does it ever feel like that's, like, annoying? Like, oh, I don't need to like put your life in perspective because like I'm dealing with something so terrible. Yeah, I think everybody has, I think everybody has their limits. Yeah. They don't know what they are.

They may be way higher than they. expected their limits to be but I think that being on this earth we all we have a different threshold everyone has a different threshold for stuff so you know the things that I have gone through may not someone may not might not be able to deal with that because that's above their threshold but if if what they're going through at that moment is, I don't know how to say it, but like, in retrospect, not as big as like almost dying all these times and stuff and like having to do all of this and hiding it for so many years and stuff like that, I feel we could say, oh, what you're going through is nothing compared

to her, but you don't know what, they could feel the exact same way that I feel. About something smaller. About something smaller because that's what their threshold is. I got to. It's, I think it's really just our souls being, and the lessons that our souls are here on this earth to learn to be able to master and level up. Did it give you though? I mean, obviously you can still cry about pop chips, but did it, or skinny pop front, which like Demi Lovato would be pissed about. Did it though give you perspective moving forward like in some ways, like kind of what doesn't kill me makes me stronger and I look at things. in a different light or, you know, are you the same bit?

Definitely. I mean, I, but it's also like, but at the same time, because I have had to grow up so fast in so many different capacities, I think like it's given me an advantage for sure, but at the same time, I have to remind myself one of my lessons that I'm continually trying to remind myself of, is that not everybody is you. Like when I deal with people that I'm like, I can't believe they're asking so unprofessionally. I would never do that.

When I was their age, I was doing this. And it's like, well, they're not you. They didn't go through the same things as you. Yeah. And it's not their fault. Like, it's a blessing that they didn't have to grow up so fast. Right. Like, that's actually great for them.

And you can't put all of your stuff on everybody. else thinking that they should act and feel the same way as you do just because you had to grow up. Right. Well, that's a very introspective, like, way to think. Like, that's amazing. No, because I feel like that. A lot of times it reminds me of like going to therapy and when you learn things like about yourself, you know, and you're like now, like, it sounds like something you may be, did you ever go to therapy? I went to therapy when I was like 22, like four months after an abusive relationship and I would just sit there for hours. My therapist would ask me one question.

I would sit there for hours talking and then he would ask me one question. I would talk and then I would start to ask myself questions as if I was, he never said anything. And after about four months, he was like, oh, you know, if you were a therapist, you'd put me out of a job. And I was like, where the fuck am I paying you all this money? Just literally, just so you can. say those things in a safe space and he's not judging. Yeah. And so I, which I could also have like said to my best friend, I definitely need to see a therapist for sure. But everybody's so greedy with this good

therapist. They're like, oh, I have an amazing therapist, but like, you know, he's mine. Yeah, sorry, not sorry. And it's like, can we share? I mean, is it a conflict of interest? I don't know. so both you and I are all over the place but I do want to get back to the Wells thing so Wells makes a joke which like I feel like might have made you love him more that he made that joke and he wasn't like you know that that was his first instinct probably was it like a turn on I think it was more of like no I think for me I was like no you need to understand what's going on here and almost kind of like like, how will you react to know this is really fucking serious?

And he, he, I mean, he was great. And then the next night, we talked all night. And he was, like, texting me. He sent me, like, a get well package. Like, once I got home from the hospital with, like, an Otis Redding vinyl and his favorite book and, like, taco toys from my dogs. It was, like, so cute.

And did he? I mean, he probably had to really prove himself like while you were kind of recovering after that. Like, I feel like that's such a, you know, huge test for a new relationship. It's like, you know, is he tech? It's like taking like, oh my God, will he text? Will he call to like a whole new level? Yeah.

I mean, I also, the way that he started off with our relationship, I was like, wow, the bachelor really did like a big relationship boot camp for you. Like, we're going deep with, like, a lot of things. I was like, thank you, Bachelor. This is great. Or thank you, Jojo. Whoever, whoever helped him out with that, Alon Gale, you know? Like, I don't know, but it was, I mean, I think we're both in a place of, like,

the next person I date is probably going to be the person that I marry. Like, and if it's not, then, like, then I'm going to call it quits and stuff. And I felt very safe and taking care of and understood. And, you know, I mean, I had to be in, before quarantine was, like, mandatory. I was in quarantine for, like, a month couldn't leave the house unless it was for a doctor and everything. And he had to, he would fly to L.A. every weekend and come and see me. And, yeah, it was really, really eye-opening about, I think it just really proved that he was not only a substantial person, but that he, In the future, if things are bad, it proved, it showed that he could be there for things like

that because it was starting off that way. So did he then move from Nashville to L.A. for you? Essentially. Essentially. He said he was always going to be moving. When we had first started talking and texting, he was like, I'm going to be moving to L.A. And I was like, oh, okay, cool. And I think I probably just pushed the needle on that.

And did you move in? Did you move in together right away when he moved? or did he get his own place first? Yeah, we moved in together. He was going to get his own place and then we thought about it and talked about it more where it was like,

anytime I was in Nashville, I would stay at his house. Anytime he was in L.A., he would stay at mine. And it was almost kind of like we already lived together. Like he had set up this like makeup table with,

like, he got like the eye home mirror and with the light and everything like that in his guest room for when I was in Nashville so that I had a place to like do my makeup and like have my things and stuff. That's so fucking cute. Yeah. It was really,

really cute. So it was, it just kind of made sense. And also I think it shows a lot if you live together. Right. I am a big advocate where you have to live with a person before you even get engaged. Yeah.

I agree completely. I think that's either you know or don't know and couples that wait and, you know, they're engaged or whatever. And then it's like, oh, we don't get along. Whoops. Yeah. Oh, I can't stand that you leave the toilet sit up. Like, I didn't realize that leaving the toilet sit up is such a big deal to me.

But it is. Like, literally, I say move in sooner rather than later. Like, yeah. You'll know. Don't, don't, don't be afraid. Don't be afraid to move in sooner rather than later. And you guys have been engaged now for what? Is it two years?

almost, Sarah? It's been 84 fucking years. That's how long it's been. Are we blaming COVID? Jumping off the Titanic. We got engaged in 2019. That is wild. First of all,

it's wild because I feel like it was yesterday. You know what I mean? Yeah, same. But I also feel like it was 84 years ago. I'm like, wait, we haven't had a wedding yet. Didn't we? What? So was it COVID?

Was it COVID that got everything for his phone? And now... It was COVID that got everything. Okay. But now... now I'm hoping this is the year. Now I'm like, okay, I need to, like, actually get into wedding planning. We need to figure out a date.

I'm like, everyone's like, when's the wedding? I'm like, you tell me, I don't know. When should we do it? Is it going to be safe? Is everybody going to be vaccinated? Yeah. Wow, it's a lot to think. First of all, getting married in general is like a lot to think about.

And then add in like the COVID aspect. And it's like I, I'm not jealous. It feels like you kind of wanted to happen. but you don't want to deal with it. Oh, I'm desperate for it to happen. But I'm also like, wait, I keep telling Wells. I'm like, I need you to propose to me again so I can feel like we're like newly engaged.

Yeah, because it's like, but I gave you a ring. You proposed to me. I'm like, you don't have to give me another ring. Just like, do it again. Surprise me. I don't know. Because now you're like kind of in that just, he's your husband, like whatever.

You know what I mean? Yeah, I mean. like we actually like bought a house together now and are you living it is that where you're living yeah so we moved we like our offer to this house got accepted the night before quarantine before lockdown began and so we ended up moving during the pandemic it like spring 2020 and because our thoughts were like oh this is perfect well like buy a house we'll have a wedding and then everything that we need

for this new house will have on our registry. The wedding never happened. So do you have no shit in your house? No, we have stuff. I just like, I think I've been putting off like buying like this standing mixer that I really, I have like a shitty standing mixer

because I'm like, well, I'm not going to, if I buy the things that like I really want for this house, we're not going to have anything on the registry. This is like, This is like an S&L skid in the making. Like you're literally Rose in the Titanic being like, I don't have the Megzer. I'm waiting for it on my registry.

Another thing I want to say about Wells is like, I feel like what's nice about him. Maybe I'm saying this because I am a jealous person is like he doesn't really have like a public history of like dating different people from like bachelor franchise. You know what I mean? He was never like in love with Jojo. We like know they didn't really super. Yeah.

So I mean, I feel like it makes. makes it kind of, it makes it a lot better. Like if you were dating like someone who was in the, you know, the bachelor franchise who was like in love with the bachelorette and like didn't get to, you know, marry her and then, but he's kind of been like the cool guy and then, you know, not into anybody, literally. And then he goes and he's the bartender and bachelor in paradise, which like,

I mean, I pretty much know the answer to the question, but I was just wondering like when he goes, it's for a long time, no? And are you ever like Yeah kind of jealous Like he's gonna be hanging out With all these people All these girls like running around

And like bikinis No Because I'm like Bitch try I dare you Yeah Like you're dealing with a fire sign From New York

I don't care how small I am I will shank you Like fucking try No Like they know not to mess with Well at least I'm telling them fucking now but so I'm not really jealous of that but I mean I think if he did have I think I don't know if I mean I would hope to say that our relationship would be the same but like yeah he's never had like even when he was on paradise and he went on like three dates and he's like I feel like the bachelor I'm like all of that it's just like a joke and laughable to me he wasn't he wasn't into anybody at all I mean he's not your typical bachelor franchise dude you know which is why I love him.

Right, right. Like probably you wouldn't be marrying him if that were the case. I saw that you have a movie that's supposed to come out in 2022. Yes. How exciting. Yeah. I don't know. We don't have a release date yet.

I'm hoping that it comes out in June for Pride Month, but I do not know. It's called my fake boyfriend with Dylan Spouse and my dear friend. Kenan. Yeah, I, it's, it's, it's a, it's an amazing, like, LGBTQ IA2S plus romcom. Where, where is it going to be stream? I love how I assume it's streaming. Like, I'm like, where is it going to straight? Like everything now stream. It's like everything's dreaming now. Yeah. Yeah, I don't have any details for that yet. Okay. But once I, once I know all of the details, release dates where you can watch it and all of that I will definitely be putting all of that on on my platforms my platforms or you know I did want to know though so is Twitter your favorite like

because I was going to ask you I think Instagram is my favorite now I got too tired for Twitter yeah and Instagram it could be like you know you could whatever yeah I also like with Instagram like I don't I don't post a create I don't I don't have the content to post a picture a day like all these people do they don't like go do photo shoots all the time like in the park and i'm like babe we would love to see you in your jug you know what i mean post you in your jug being like a gallon a day hashtag gallon a day keeps the Botox away that's a lie so i'm mostly just like repost other posts on my story on instagram that i'm like really i don't know but i got really tired with twitter just because

I got old and my brain stopped working. But Wells is still doing it. I mean, the man is, the man is killing it out there. He's younger than I am and he's six years old than me. Do you guys, oh, man,

do you guys watch The Bachelor together? Yeah, we do. You do. Sometimes he, because he gets like, screeners. Like a preview link beforehand for podcast stuff. So sometimes he'll watch it without me,

but then I watch it like essentially. immediately afterwards. I still love it. I mean, I've watched it since. It's a very first season with my mom. So like, I've just been watching it for forever. That's what people don't get like a lot of people are telling me when I complain about it. They're like, stop watching. I'm like, I can't. Yeah, I don't know how to not watch the show. There are people that give it up, but like they're like, I'm not watching this season. Like they protest. It's like, first of all, I need to be in the loop. So like, if you don't watch this, you're not going to know who the Bachelorette is. You're not going to know who's hooking up throughout the year.

You're not going to know who's on paradise. You can't. You're committed and like you're in it. So you were saying before, you were saying before that like you've been feeling that it's kind of gross in the sense that it's like very catty this season. Well, I just think that the villains back in the day, like i can think of what were ben first ben not ben higgins first ben bachelor wine guy he ended up with that Courtney girl do you remember this this is like decades old and i remember

she was like a really big villain like they skinny dipped in the ocean together and like they snuck out of like the crazy thing and i'm pretty sure that they ended up together obviously not together anymore, but I just feel like the villains back then, like you could, like, you hated them, but like, you could still laugh at the ridiculous things that they were doing. And now it's just like these villains, like these, especially the way, they've gotten so cool. Like, there was that girl that did like the escort rumor and stuff, which is like, okay, fucking shaming sex workers, how dare you? Yeah.

Fucking ridiculous. And then this Cheney girl, Wells is obsessed with her because he's like, I, he loved the villain. He's like, give me the drama. I will get to have to deal with this in paradise and it's going to be great. This is what makes the television and stuff. He's like, of course I think, still, whatever. He's like, I don't, it's like, delusional. How does she sleep at night?

But I'm just like, I'm so tired of it. At first I was like, okay, this is great. And now I'm like, this has just gotten diabolical and I'm so over it. Yeah. And it's like, it's just wild because it's like, what's your, I mean, yes, you're going to get airtime. But like you were saying like at this point, it's not likable. Like the fact that Wells can see beyond that and he's thinking kind of like fourth, you know, wall shit, but it's like as the audience, we're not like. And yeah, you can root for the villain sometimes because there's something redeeming. But like right now there's not. She's literally saying to the camera, she doesn't give a shit. She just wants to win. She's literally shitting on every girl. But listen, I'm with you, babe. We're in it to win it. We're here for the fucking long haul. So it could be bad.

I mean, we're watching. We're fucking watching. I also, again, want to tell everyone about your podcast that is coming out. Bone, Mary, Barry. When is it coming out? When's the premiere? Pretty easy to remember. 22.

2020. It's two to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to. It's kind of like how Kylie had her baby on 2-22, except, yeah, Sarah. I don't keep up. It's all that much. Okay, Sarah, I'm going to be on your dick now. I'm going to be on your dick now. You're going to stay in the loop now, babe.

You're going to stay in the loop. There's only, I only have so much threshold for reality stuff. I know, I know. And The Bachelor is pretty much it. I know, the Bachelor takes up. I know. So could you imagine? So do you watch any Bravo shows?

No. Wow. The Bachelor is your like thing? Yeah. My best friend's been trying to get me on like the real housewives for forever. That's hard because it's like seasons upon seasons upon seasons upon seasons upon franchises upon franchises. Yeah. I was not a Vanderpump girl. So good. I like I've watched the like the Netflix reality stuff because it just they just started putting it out. So I'm like, and it was a pandemic. So I was like, oh, okay. So I watched like the too hot to handle and the like, love is blind. Love is blind. Yeah.

Yeah. Right. Right. Because it forces you. It like comes up and you're like, okay, with the other stuff, you have to like go out and find it. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

I need it shoved in my face. You need it chubbed in my face. So everyone remember two, 22, 22, bone Maryberry is coming out. And can't wait to hear more about your movie coming out. And thank you so. much for joining me on this podcast and I loved getting to meet you and I'm so excited you're part of dear media now so we're network buds thank you so much for having me and thank you for dealing with my crazy long ass tangents I love them I come come every week yeah anyway drink a lot

of water listen to Sarah's podcast when it comes out bone Mary Barry I love saying it I'm like obsessed with saying it on uh February 22nd 2022 thank you Sarah so much I'm going to be DM you Kardashian News. Okay, goodbye. Thank you. Bye, babe. Bye. Thank you guys so much for listening to this episode of Not Skinny but Not Fat. Follow me on Instagram at Not Skinny but Not Fat. Subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss any episodes. Rate the podcast that you love so much on Apple Podcast and write a little review. If you tell me you did, I'll give you a big virtual smoocheroo. Thank you guys so much for listening and I'll see you next Tuesday.