Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster - Ixta Belfrage

Episode Date: March 25, 2026

Award-winning cook and food writer Ixta Belfrage – author of ‘Mezcla’ and new book ‘FUSÃO’ – is this week’s Dream Restaurant guest. Did someone mention Prawn Lasagne?Ixta Belfrage’s new book ‘FUSÃO’ is out now - buy it here.Her previous book ‘Mezcla’ is available here.Follow Ixta on Instagram @ixta.belfrage Watch the video version of this episode on the Off Menu YouTube on Thu 26 Mar. Off Menu is now on YouTube: @offmenupodcast Follow Off Menu on Instagram and TikTok: @offmenuofficial. And go to our website www.offmenupodcast.co.uk for a list of restaurants recommended on the show. Off Menu is a comedy podcast hosted by Ed Gamble and James Acaster. Produced, recorded and edited by Ben Williams for Plosive. Video production by Ben Williams and Megan McCarthy for Plosive. Artwork by Paul Gilbey (photography and design). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, Ed Gamble here from the off-menu podcast that you're listening to right now. I bring great news. My brand-new stand-up tour, Fresh Hell, is on sale at the end of this month. Sign up to my mailing list for early access at edgamble.com.com.com. It's going to be great. Welcome to the off-manue podcast, taking the thin, Melba Toast of conversation, spreading on the chicken liver patte of humour. And what else you've put on that? Like a sort of sweet chutney, maybe. Do you like a bit of chutney with that, James? That is Ed Gamble. My name is James Aecaster.

Together we own a dream restaurant. And every single week we invite in a guest and we ask them their favourite ever start. A main course dessert, cider shan drink. Not in that order. And this week, I guess it is Easter Belfridge. Easter Belfridge. Is a wonderful chef, James.

Creates incredible cookbooks. And of course, created one of your favourite dishes. My God. And mine, actually. The corn lasagna. So amazing. The habanero prawn lasagna. I had it on live television.

On Sunday brunch, and I waved it down, ate at all, and I think, I believe I even finished KSI's. What a celebrity life you lead, James? How does we go on Sunday brunch, man? So many showbiz anecdotes, finishing KSI's lasagna. What you want to be doing on Sunday brunch is ending up on the bill with people who, you know, have a very strict eating exercise regime. He's training for his, like, boxing or something.

Yeah, so you want someone when they're like, okay, I can try everything, but I can't go nuts. I'm going to get certain times. And you're like, great, because I love this. I'm having yours. I want to have your prawn lasagna, and you have no idea how much, like, I'm the one who's landed on their feet. Like, good luck winning that boxing match. Yeah. But I'm the champ.

Yeah, you're the champ. I'm very excited to talk to Easter, especially because that's one of my favorite bites of all time. Yes. Easter also co-wrote Flavor, which was an Otolengi Test Kitchen, book. We of course have had Yota Motelangi on the pod. Yes, and he was so patient with us. He was so patient with us. Will Easter be as patient with us? I think she listens to the pod, so I doubt it. We'll certainly be as trying. Yes, we're difficult people. Yes, so we will do our best in that regard, and we'll see if we do her head in or not. Yeah. Easter's latest book is

called Meskla. Go and get it. But don't get any of her books or any books that she's been involved in. Truly wonderful stuff. But if she says the secret ingredient, which we have pre-decided upon, she will be removed from the restaurants, regardless of how good she is at cooking and that. Yes, and this week the secret ingredient is Easter eggs. Sorry. Easter eggs, so sorry. Easter eggs.

Listen, this is like the eighth hundredth episode or something. It said so many secret ingredients. And Easter your first name, spelt different. Yeah. But sounds like Easter is an Easter eggs. So we've just gone for that and we don't think you're going to pick it. Yeah. So that's good.

I do like an Easter egg. I love an Easter egg. Just taste different. I love an Easter egg and they've come up before in the podcast and we say about how when we were kids, we thought they would just be giant versions of cream eggs and be full of all the stuff. But you know what?

As an adult, I'm glad they're not. I like that. It's just that. The perfect thickness of milk chocolate. I prefer dairy milk in Easter egg form. And there's something about it. There's something about it that tastes.

Pure nostalgia as well. It tastes different. Yeah. It tastes like that's an Easter egg, man. I could be blindfolded. You could give me a square of dairy. dairy milk and then some Easter egg chocolate. Yeah.

Loads of different forms of dairy milk in different ways. I would be able to pinpoint that's the Easter milk. Yeah, because they're different shapes. No, not because of the shape. But that's how you would pinpoint it. It would taste different. I quite like those fancy ones as well. Like the Hotel Shockler ones that you need a hammer and chisel to get apart

because they're so thick. Yes. Yeah. And they got like designs on them. Like they're not just a smooth egg. It's like... Caponi's not a smooth egg. Yeah, but I'm...

I mean, like, the designs on the posh ones are like, that's why they're so thick. It's like a painting, like a self-bord. A whole medallion on there. Yeah. And like a coat of arms. Yeah. And then you're like, that's when you know, that's real, that's real royalty, royal egg.

This is the off-menu menu menu of Easter Belbridge. Easter Belbridge. Welcome, Easter to the Dream Restaurant. Oh, my God. Welcome, Mr. Belfinch to the Dream Restaurant, and best menu for a sudden time. I've been waiting for that all my life. Yeah?

Yeah. Did it match up? Yeah. I mean, it's more beautiful that I couldn't have imagined. Yeah. Thank you very much. I'd imagine the bit of your life before this podcast was a thing, was a very confusing time for you,

waiting for that specifically. Yeah, it really was. I felt like I was blind and now I see. Yes. Everything clicked the moment this podcast came on the scene. Exactly. A lot of people felt like that when our podcast came on the scene. I think so.

I think you've changed many, many lives. Yeah. You've certainly made me laugh a hell of a lot. Oh, yeah, yeah. This guy makes me laugh all the time. So does this guy. I'm actually really intrigued. Well, I can't wait to, like, see your laugh

because I don't know if anyone's ever told you that your laugh sounds really fake. Does it? Don't you think? No, I feel it's real. It sounds really fake. I'm like, I can't, I can't wait to see your actual facial expression to see if it's real.

Imagine if at no point I laugh in this episode. Well, that's going to be deeply embarrassing. Yeah, yeah. He could be thinking about it too much. Have you never thought that? That is fake. It sounds fake. You obviously see his facial expressions when he laughs, but like, do you ever listen back?

My face goes everywhere when I laugh as well. All over the place. He's part of a trio. Him and Tom Ninen and Nish Kumar, who all went to university together, all have big loud laughs. And they really just like, their whole entire body and everything, they're so much joy. They're not just laughing and enjoying what has made them laugh. They've also just, you can tell the feeling of laughing makes them happy. You can see all three of them on their faces,

Like, this is so lovely. I love it. Does the feeling of laughter not make you happy? Yeah, but you guys are like, it's like, it's like a drug. Like, if you merely see the three of you, you just completely immersed in it. You let yourself go. I've had different laughs throughout my life as well. Oh, really?

Do you work on them? No, I think the only time I consciously changed my laugh was I got really into laughing like Lou from Neighbors. Do you remember Lou from Neighbors? Do you an impression? Yeah. Oh, the older guy. Yes, yeah, yeah.

Harold Bishop's frenemy. Oh, really? Oh, my God, Harold Bishop, what blast from the past. What happened to Hamilton in the end? I didn't really keep up with it. I mean, it's still going? No, I think it's finished now because it went to Amazon and starred Misha Barton from the OC for a bit.

You're kidding me. No, I'm not at all. She cropped up in neighbours. So Harold Bishop obviously got washed off a rock. Obviously. Back in the day. He got washed off a rock. What do you mean?

Yeah, what do you mean? Speaking of being washed off a rock, did you hear about the surfer guy who, went surfing off the coast of Sydney and then like disappeared and like a day later they found him stranded on like an abandoned island like miles and miles away. Anyway, sorry. No, that's impressive because that's real life. But for neighbours, that wouldn't cut it. No.

But what was really funny is that I'd never heard of this island and I looked up on Google Maps and people had already like within hours of the newspeas coming out, people had already started leaving reviews saying like, great place for a break if you get washed up at sea. Wow. Who's doing that? I know. I don't know. That's a very specific type of person. I don't know why. Anyway, he got washed off a rock. Yes.

Madge just found his glasses in a little rock pool. It was very sad. I remember that when I was a kid. Years later, he turns up again. He's completely lost his memory. Was it on that island? Governor's Island. It might have been on the straight to the island.

I think he just went a bit around the coast. And then he thought his name was Ted and he was in the Salvation Army. Oh, wow. I should watch Neighbors. Yeah, we need to catch up on about 15 years of Neighbors. It's all like every day for anywhere. But it has finished now, so we know there's a finite amount of episodes. We could start binging it.

I think that's a bad idea, actually. No, no, no, I think that's a great idea. It'll be really good. That's a new pod. Of all the shows to watch. We could do a pod, the three of us. You're out for Great Benito. We can do a pod the three of us, and we just watch all of neighbors from the start.

But we have to watch the same episode twice a day, because that's how they used to show it. Yeah, yeah. Okay, that sounds really fun, like a really great. use of my time. Yes, absolutely. Yeah, yeah. How have you been using your time, though, lately? How have I been using my time?

Well, mainly always just eating or thinking about food, which is, as I imagine, you guys do as well. I just did a pop-up last night, and so I'm, like, slightly hung over from having only two margaritas after service, but... How was that? So, a pop-ups are like, is this... Was this the first night of the pop-up? It was one-night-only thing at the standard.

Have you been to Decimo at the top of the standard? No, I've been to the bottom of the standard. You absolutely must go to the top. Okay, you've got to go to the top. So there's a restaurant at the top of the standard. Beautiful views, like such nice deco. It kind of feels like 70s, California and Mexican, like, catuses and anyway, really, really nice.

The food there is incredible. It's like Mexican, Spanish. And the head chef there, Paola, is just, she makes incredible tacos. Anyway, I did a pop up there last night, so I've been cooking there for the last two days. I feel a bit mental, actually. Yeah, a bit du la. sleep and like elbow deep in prawns for the last two days. A lot of prawns.

A lot of prongs. We should talk about prawn. We should talk about the prawn lasagna up top. Loved it so much. Best thing I've ever had to eat on Sunday brunch. I know that doesn't sound like a compliment. Honestly, I almost, maybe I did. I shed a little tear when I heard that.

Honestly, it is, because I know how much you love lasagna I have heard. Yeah, yeah. To hear that you loved it that much was actually like life changing. I think about it a lot. I wolfed it down. Every time there's any kind of lasanasias on menus I look to see if there's prawns in it now and it never is and I get really disappointed.

But that's good. No one's trying to copy it. Not yet anyway. I've seen some like, I mean, there's obviously, you can get like seafood lasagnas. And I've seen some people do some crab lasagnas recently, which sound really good. But no, I've also never seen a prawn lasagna. Yeah.

But yeah, it is, I got a lot of flak? Is flak a word? Yeah. From the lasagne? From the lasagne or slack? Flack. You got flack. I got flack from people who are like...

A lot of slack would be. them going like, yeah, go for it. Yeah, do you want. Yeah. Flack. It's not flack from people saying, like, who do you think you are cooking of prawn for that long? Like, prawns need to be just like pan-fried, and I'm telling you to make it into a ragu and cook it slowly. And people are you like,

are you mental, but it does work. Who's giving you flak? There are the people. Lazzania people. They say, who do you think you are? They say, who do you think you are? Who the fuck do you think you are? Looking at a pawn for that long. The prawn police. Yeah. I suppose that's the thing that they're getting angry about.

I thought they're going to get angry that you're even putting prawns in a lasagna. But it's how long you're cooking it for. Yeah, yeah. They're furious about. I mean, people get upset about a lot of things, but they really have strong feelings about how long you cook a brawn. Wow.

And I'm here to tell you, you can make it into a regoo. Anyone's job, you look at it and you just think, I bet they don't get that much, you know, grief from people. Yeah. I bet I can imagine what the complaints are. Every time you speak to someone about their job, the things that people get angry about are absolutely beyond what, You could have imagined, or ever predicted.

No, it is ridiculous. How dare you cook a prawn for that long? Who do you think you are? Who do you think you are is such a funny thing to say. Yeah, really funny. I actually feel like I've reached peak prawn now. I think I'm actually over them. There's actually no prawns on my menu, which is bonkers,

because everyone who knows me knows me as like the prawn lady. I hope that's not true. No, one's actually ever called me that. But, I mean, everyone knows that I'm obsessed with prawns. And there's not, I only just realised there's not one prawn on this menu. Well, I think if last night. night you were elbow deep in prawns. Yeah, specifically. The last thing you want to talk about is prawns. You don't want prawns on your dream menu at this point, do you? Absolutely not.

Absolutely not. What do you think about, and you're the best person to ask this, and there's a few people in the podcast, I think, I've maybe asked this question too, but never before I've been so excited about the answer. What do you think about, prawn cocktail crisps? Oh, um. The flavor. Yes. Specifically, how authentic is it? As opposed to, huh? Of course the flavor. Of course the flavor. Well, the flavor. Okay. cocktail crisps. I haven't had them in a really, really, really, really long time. I think the only ones I've had are just like the Pink Walker's ones. Used to think they were delicious. I don't

think they taste anything like prawn. They're just sort of like a bit tangy, which is not really what a prawn is. Well, actually, no, haven't, yeah, prawn cocktail, yes. It's supposed to be ketchup. Mayo prawns? Yeah, I guess. So, but it's, it's, it's that that it tastes of, it takes of ketchup. I guess, yeah, it tastes of, does it taste of prawn or does it just taste of ketchup? I'm not getting any prawn out of that situation. I think it's just like ketchup. up with like an oda, like seafood seasoning. But it's not, like, I'm not getting prawn. But I do like them. I'm not a massive crisp person. So, you're a prawn lady. I'm a, I'm a prawn lady, but I'm not a crisp person. You can't be both. No, I can't, no, you're not allowed to be both

actually. I'm not a crisp guy. No? Really. You know, people, people, but I'm not a Chris man. You're not a truffle crisps. Oh, I do not like truffle crisps. Oh, really? See, I like the Torres truffle crisps. Oh, no, I can't bear that smell. Really? You, in the same thing, you, in the camp? No, I, I, but my partner is in that camp. So like, now I'm, you know, any time I do smell truffles or anything like that and we're together, I'm like, I'm like, I'm going to get her out of it. Because as soon as she smells that, she's going to find out of the hand. There's hardly any emotion on your face. You're what, no, I just enjoy it. You got busted. Just try to enjoy myself easily. That did not look real. Yeah, you didn't think my

truffle I know it was funny. Are you telling me? I have had that, I have been accused of that before, for having dead eyes when I laugh but I can't really do anything about it No but I think hopefully it'll get more animated No no no no that was it That's as far as we go Do a podcast about being told

You've got dead eyes when you laugh Yeah that's good good idea We could call it Laver boy Yeah Lava boy Yeah What?

La Laugh boy Oh yeah Okay that's a good one We will start with still A Spark than Mortar Do you have a preference Easter? I absolutely do have a preference And actually, I'm going to have to steal someone's ideas, one of your previous guests, one of my favorite episodes.

Great. It's only happened on one occasion, maybe, when someone's stolen on my idea. I'm stealing the idea and enhancing it to my taste. Rather than the dish itself. It's the idea. It's the idea. It's the execution. So, May Martin, a living legend.

Congratulations, May. They wanted, I think, water from a babbling brook. And when I heard that, I was like, what better way to receive water. Yeah. But I'm an absolutely a sparkling water girl, obsessed with sparkling water, inject it into my veins. So I would like sparkling water. That would actually be horrendous. Because famously.

Yeah. Famously bubbles going into the veins. Oh, yeah. Instant heart attack. Instant death. Instant stroke. Okay. So maybe not into the veins, but yes, the babbling brook.

So straight from the babbling brook, very cold sparkling water, short glass, like this kind of thing. Yeah. Hate tall glasses. despise tall glasses. I don't actually know why. I knew someone was going to ask me that when I said I hate short glasses, one of you. But I don't have a reason.

Who do you think you are? Who do I think I am? I don't know. I wonder why it is. I think I feel like there's less room for things. Like you get a tall glass and it's like if it's full of ice, there's just not really barely any liquid in there.

But is that the only reason? Well, you know what people are going to come back with for that. They're going to go, what if you have a short glass is full of ice. Yeah. I mean, well, I actually have a note here on my note, say, three ice cubes. Oh, okay. Standard size?

Like, medium, medium size? Like that? Is that medium size? That looks standard size. That's standard. Yeah. Oh, all right, well, standard. Three standard ice cubes. Cold sparkling water from a babbling brook and a bit of lime, but not like super limey, just like medium lime.

Medium lime, medium ice cubes, medium glass. You love lime. You love the lime bikes. Oh, I love lime. Before we started recording. All these was talking about was line bikes and she was shocked we hadn't been on line bikes

all three of you the great Benito included who is not wearing a sombrero which you thought something else we put a pin in to come back to is you imagine when you're listening you imagine the great Benito to be wearing a sombrero I imagined him to be a Mexican man

wearing a sombrero but no but the listeners will never know well they will now they'll write his cover they know that he's not a Mexican man with a sombrero but they don't know much more than that They've got one thing to cross off the list.

Yeah. This is the longest game of guess whoever. Yeah. Okay. So the Mexican man in a sombrero. Flip down the picture of the Mexican guy. That's not him. Now we've got a lot more to go.

I kind of agree with the tall, thin glasses. No. But I find sometimes the short glasses, if there's some ice in there, if it's like a cocktail or something, I drink it too quickly because of the big mouth hole. But do you think that you drink a tall drink slower? I think it feels like I do because it looks like there's more level in it. Do you know what I mean?

This guy, no matter how big the drink, two gulps and he's done. Me too. I'm a golper. Yeah, I'm a golper too. Big sips. And he doesn't even like make any noise. It's just like, it's just gone. No facial expressions.

No noise. Completely dead eyes. Literally like people say about people drinking like a fish. It's literally like a fish though. Like, just like mouth opens and it's all just gone. Yeah. No noise. No nothing.

What's the point in taking time over it? I want another one. I want to try something else. I think a medium amount of time is also good in this respect. I do. I am. I think medium is where it's at. Not too little, not too much. I tell you what the glass shoggy.

These really trendy glasses. You've been to loads of these places, I'd imagine. They're almost like completely shallow. They're like little cat bowls. No. Little catpots. They are like little cat bowls. I know what you mean.

It's like they've taken a glass, like a standard tumbler. Yeah. And they've cut that in half. It's a demi tumbler. A demi tumbler. No, I don't like those either. This, I think, is slightly too big for my liking. I would like it to be sort of that big.

Okay. But anyway, semantics. You keep on doing visual references. But this is a... Oh, he's filmed. He's fucking loves it now. He's filming it. He puts on YouTube.

It's a knife. I don't know where the cameras are, but this is the glass we're referring to. One right there. Oh, yeah. Yeah, we got it. We got it. He's obsessed.

Oh, there's one there. He's obsessed with it. All he talks about is filming it now. And you're playing into his hands by doing, like, it's this much and stuff like that. He's loving it. He's sitting there going, this is why.

I started the YouTube channel. Awful. Pop-labs or bread. Jesus. Pop-labs or bread. Oh my God, I've been waiting for that. No, you haven't. I made you joke.

You were godsmouth. I was literally staring right out at you and you got me. Fucking hell. Excuse me. Am I, you're allowed to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. God, you're a fan of the pod. You know we let it fly.

God. I'm slightly hung over and, yeah, I really almost threw up my heart just then. Oh, wow. That's the ultimate episode when you, You surprise someone so much they throw up. Then I'd be like, Benito, you were right, we should film it. Yeah.

She threw her heart up. And that's a clip. That's a clip. That's a clip. Oh, my God. Well done. Thank you. Well done, sir.

Thank you very much. Number one podcast. I'm also sad that you're not dressed up as a genie, but I should probably go to one of the live shows for that right. You do dress up, right? No. Never? We've got a lamp. We've got a big lamp on the stage for the live.

I jump out of the lamp, sure, but I'm not dressing up. Fair enough. For the live shows, we wear our own merch. Oh, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. That is small. Because first tour, we had our own merch on. Second tour, we got the merch, which is pictures of us on the last tour. So we're wearing the merch on the last one.

Oh, the Inception thing. Very clever. The next show is next year, it's going to blow people's minds. They're not going to know where they are. What do you have on the back? Tour dates, I think, or? Good point. I've never checked, really. I think it's been tour dates.

Never checked. I just put it on. My heart is still beating, my God. Really? That's good, though. Woo, yeah. You should be. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. You look very proud. Yeah, I'm really proud of myself. It's been a while since I've got people. Really? Series 1, I was getting them every single episode. Yeah. And now it's like...

I mean, I knew to expect it. I just didn't know when. Anyway. Puppetons or bread. Yes. I'm going to go... Well, I'm not really a massive Popadon person either. Not a bread gal or a pop...

No, I do like bread. I'm going to go with, like, grilled... Really. grilled, olive-oily, garlicy bread with chicken liver patte, but not like a whipped chicken liver patte, like a Tuscan... I know you love it, but I think you love the Frenchy, creamy, wippy one. Hello. I just love it. But I don't want that one.

I want like a Tuscan style kind of like, it's more sort of bitty and textured. Bitty and texture doesn't sound good, to be fair. That was a fair reaction. But do you know what I mean? I know what you mean, yeah. Sagey anchovy-e, anchovy-e, heavy. chicken liver crustini. But the bread has to be super grilled.

Cat food. It does smell like cat food. Not smell it, but it just looks like it. No, but it does. Can you not talk about my bread and Popatom starter like this? Please. Get ready, I speak my mind. I speak my mind.

Okay, fair enough. But I am obsessed with chicken liver. Yeah. In a very, very bit. I'm actually liver full stop. I'm actually in a club called the liver lovers. Go on. Self-confessed.

How many people in the liver lovers? Yeah. For shout-out, Flick, Melek, Holly and myself. Yeah. How did it start? Just a mutual love of liver, really. But did you know each other previously? Or did your eyes meet across a butcher's counter?

Across a big piece of liver. No, we knew each other previously. We've known each other for a long time. Well, Meleck less so, maybe like three years and Flick and Holly longer. Anyway, whatever. We all love liver. We bonded over like Turkish, like lamb's liver with sort of like crispy fat, you know? Uh-huh.

Yeah. That sounds good. And then we did have grand plans to like visit every Turkish restaurant in London to try their lamb's liver. We've only been to one. But we are still, I know it's not good. It's not good. But we are the liver lovers and I do love liver. So I'm going to start with chicken liver christini.

How often is the really admiral attempts to try and move it off the liver lover group there, by the way, but that's not going to happen for a long time, just to let you know. How often is, is it like a WhatsApp group? It is a WhatsApp group. That's really the most action that's happening, just like. Read us some stuff on the liver lovers, the WhatsApp group. I don't have my phone here. I didn't bring my phone into the, I've only... What? I want to know how often the WhatsApp group's being updated. How often is someone dropping in liver-relevant content?

You're making me feel really bad now because we actually don't talk about liver that much. We basically just plan, like, let's all meet up and go for dinner and eat liver. Who's free on this day? And then it just never happens. Never happens. God, it's a terrible club, isn't it? It's a bad club. Yeah, it's a pretty bad club, I think.

I mean, after this podcast, you're going to go on there and go. Guess what? I talked about the liver lovers on a podcast. The world's going to know about us, guys. I mean, surely you're going to tell them. Oh, God. I would love any listeners to maybe, like, comment with their favorite liver. So I know where to go.

Oh, yeah, yeah? Yeah. Oh, well, does that definitely let you know where the best liver is? I don't want to talk about the liver lovers anymore. I feel deeply embarrassed that we haven't actually eaten that much liver together. But we do all love liver. Do you ever talk about the sort of bad reputation that liver has amongst the general population? Yeah, yeah.

We know we're like cooler than most. Yeah, yeah. I didn't since say that. No, but I did. I mean, you know, you have to have like a certain jeuniceiquire to love liver, I think. Yeah. Not every regular guy. Most people don't love it.

Yeah. But the liver patte, when it is creamy and smooth, I think is delicious. It's so fucking good. Yeah. Oh my God. It does smell of cat food, though. But that is not an insult. No, this is not going well. This is not going well.

Picture the scene. We're in Tuscany. I just made a confession. What did you just say? You went right over it because we've got in your head about the liver. But like, he just said he wants to eat his cat's cat food. Wait, what? Sometimes I'm feeding my cat

And I'm like, it does smell like cat food But it looks human, looks like human food We've started giving our cat soup Really? Cat soup. Cat soup, made of? I mean, to me, it just looks like chicken And I think the one this morning was like chicken and pee

You can actually see chicken and pee And there's like a lot of like Do they eat the peas? Yeah. My dog used to like eat around the peas When we gave him leftovers. Right. No.

Pigs eating the peas. Do you give him some bread to mop it up with us? Like a gentleman. Give him his little spoon. Yeah. Tuck his napkin in. Sweetie. Some cat food, you see it, or some pet food, you see it advertised.

Yes. Sometimes you see it advertised and it says, tested by humans. And you're like, who has got that? What grim humans doing that? It is literally just a bit of meat. Yeah. So it's not that big a deal. But what is the smell, though?

Because if it is just a bit of meat, why does it smell like that? It's the gelatin that has the smell. You're adding vitamins and stuff, right? Vitamins, always smelly. They are. It's true. Smelly vitamin, smelly gelatin makes a smelly bowl of cat food.

Yeah. Have you ever opened a little jar of multivitamins? It stinks, like a farm. It does. Like a farm? Yeah, like a farm or hay. I kind of like the smell of vitamin C. Oh, yeah, that's great.

It's like limey. That's lovely, but the multi ones. When they all get together, they stink. That is vitaminist. Yeah. You've got to keep them apart. They're absolutely stink when they get together. James is a vitamin segregationist.

Yeah. I'll say it. Oh, dear. I think that sounds like a delicious bread course. You're just saying that. You don't really believe it. I would obviously change up the chicken. I'd have a smooth one from my tastes.

But I didn't get to tell you where I want it. So it has to be from the co-op in Rufina, which is the town where I grew up, near where I'm. grew up in Italy. There's a co-op there? No, but it's not like the English co-op. It's not like the English co-op. They have co-ops in Italy.

Well, in Tuscany, they call it ho-op, because they don't pronounce the cur. It's like a her. But it's the best supermark in the world, and they make the best chicken liver, like Figatini is what it's called. And it's unbelievable. But in Tuscany, when you get,

it's a classic starter, the chicken liver of a crustini, but they always do it with unsalted bread because, like, hundreds of years ago, salt used to be expensive, but I'm like, get with the times. Like, salt is no longer expensive. You can put salt in your bread now. But, so, strictly, I would need it to be salted bread.

Yes. Very grilled, very much, like a lot of olive oil. Yeah. I feel like we should move on from the chicken liver. You always want to move on from stuff. Yeah, that doesn't work with us. We've literally been talking about cat food and liver for about 45. Don't worry.

Don't worry. You're good hands. We know when to move on. He'll edit it later. Yeah. You're okay. Fair enough. All right.

We'll move on now, will we? Yeah, yeah, definitely. We talked about it for fucking ages. We're talking about it. Your dream starter. Well, I forgot to ask you for a very special wish at the beginning. Okay. If you may grant me one.

Yeah, yeah. I get full really quickly, but I love food. And it's all I ever think about, it's all I ever want to do is eat. So I get really excited about having huge meals. And I have grand plans of doing bang bangs, you know, like when you eat one meal after another. Yeah. But then I just get full really quickly.

So please grant me the power to just never get full. Yes. Absolutely. But no, actually, grant me the power to never get full, but then at the end to feel like perfectly satisfied. Yeah. Because you know what I mean. That's good because you nearly, it's like someone wishing for, you know, immortality.

No, I don't want that. That's a curse. Never getting full as a curse. I do not want to be alive forever and I don't want to be not full forever. Yeah. You're right. You've never been so serious about it from the podcast. You look to me, that's a curse.

That is a curse. That is a curse. If you were immortal to live a pig. It would be. I would hate to live forever. Because immortality, people often get tripped up on that when they wish for it. Because they're not, they think they're wishing for eternal youth. Yeah.

They're not, they're wishing for immortality. So one day they're going to be 200 with all their fingers falling off. Yeah, yeah. It is a curse. Yeah, that's a curse. Good point, Ed. Really good point. Yeah.

I'm like, your food thing about, like, you want a massive meal and then you get full really quick. That's like me with a bath. Yes, me too. You drink the whole bath. And then I'm like, I'm so full of bath. I wanted a little sip. I can't wait to have a lovely bath when I get home. Fill the bath, really full, really hot.

I get in five seconds. This is horrible. Bored. I am 100 exactly the same. I love the idea of it. And I get in, I'm like just hot and bothered. I'm like, a bit of a waste of water. But anyway, yeah, so great appetite throughout.

Perfect satisfaction at the end. That's my one wish. And you want to live forever? No. That is a curse. That's a good. Okay. Sorry.

Get my wires crossed. My dream starter is many things. If that's okay. We're going to go for a Mexican feast as a dream starter. But like starter things. A platter. So, yes. Maybe a platter.

Yeah? But it's going to be more than a platter. It's going to be many platters. Okay. So I actually was recently, earlier this year, I was a guest. George on Master Chef Australia. And... Best Master Chef.

It's actually pretty good. It's mad. High stakes. Love it. I've just been to Australia and ended up talking about their Master Chef on stage, getting you guys are mental. They are mental.

It is insane. There's so much going on. They start with like 8,000 contestants. It goes on for about a year. There's people, there's contestants dying of old age halfway through the series. It's a curse.

It's true. It's a curse. It's a curse. You've wished for unlimited Master Chef. Actually, the one, the one that I was guest judge on was a series called Back to Win, which was basically people that had already been on who hadn't won, who were back, so like trying. So anyway, it was the Mystery Box Challenge.

So I don't know if you know what that is, but like I got to pick like 10 of my favorite ingredients and then they, 17 of them had to cook dishes based on my favorite ingredients. It was a bit of like... It's a bit like ready, steady cook. Yeah, but I feel like I had so much power. I was like, here's everything I love. All of you go and make something for me. And it was very fucking exciting.

But anyway, long story short, there was a guy called Jamie. I forgot his surname, but he made one of the best tostadas I've ever had. So the actual tortilla itself, he made with, like, toasted massa, like the Niximilized cornflower. So it was, like, really roasty, toasty, corny. And then he fried it. And then when it came out with the friar, he then, like, tossed it in more of that, like, roasty, toasty corn. So, first of all, like, the actual tostallah was, like, sensational. Great.

And then it was, like, raw Benito, like, two. What? Roar Benito. Not Benito. I thought you were telling him to roar like a lion. Roar Benito. I'd love to see him roar. Instead of the MGM line.

He wouldn't be able to do it. It'd be like when Simba's a little cub and he's trying to do it. He's never going to roar. He won't ever roar. Like the fish. Yes. It's like a tuna.

Yeah. I think it's a tuna. Is it a tuna? Something like that. Anyway. They're smaller than... Smaller. Yeah.

but equally delicious. I've caught one before. Oh, have you know. You caught a bonito. You caught a great bonito. How have we never talked about this on the podcast? Court a bonito. It's absolutely crazy.

Go on, tell us more. Cooked it up later. It was fucking disgusting. Ah, no. They're very bony. They've got very, like, very thin bones. They do, yeah, yeah. So you didn't remember those.

No, no, no, no. So it was him. He's got fin bones. Yeah, you caught him. Yeah, you didn't have thin bones and no sombrero to be seen. Teggusting. Did he said to it? Do I produce a podcast?

Because I don't want to finish you. I don't want to eat you. Oh, thin bones. Sorry, you've already said this is many platters of Mexican food. Yeah, we haven't even. And we're on the starter. And now I can see why you're trying to move us on

from the cat food. Yeah. Because this is a long menu. You knew what you had coming out of the bed. We didn't. Raw Benito. Yes. Raw Benito.

But really quickly, like, not poached, what's it called? Oh my God, what is wrong with me? You know, when you just, like, put some lime on it. Are you even as chef? I don't think. Not cured. Like Cuis Cued?

Yeah. But like really quickly. So it was still like quite raw. And then there was like a pineapple and scotch bonnet and pickled onion hibiscus situation going on. And then like grilled pieces of opera. Oh my God. It was insane. Honestly, I've had my fair share of tacos and to Stasadas.

I've been to Mexico. I have family of Mexico. Like this was honestly life changing. Wow. Amazing. So that's going to be on the table. Jamie Fleming! How did you do that?

He's very good at Googling stuff with little weak-boned hands, tapping away at the keys. He snaps a finger every time he Googles something. Yeah, it's a curse. Jamie Flang, anyway, shout out Jamie.

Best of style that I've ever had. So that's going to be on the table. We're also going to have like a platter of Alpasteur tacos. So a pile of beautiful soft tortillas, a whole spit of pork, grilled pineapple, all the salsas,

definitely a heronero salsa, a salsa matcher, some just like chopped onions and lime that's going to be on there as well. Is that from anywhere specific? Well, I don't remember the name, but there's a place in the outskirts of Mexico City. It's kind of just looks like a car park and you can just drive up and people just eat on like the hoods of their cars. I can't remember what it's called though. I wonder if the great Benito can find it. You can find it. See, that sounds a...

Car park. Taco Mexico City. That sounds so good. Alpastore Mexico City car park. When you hear about somewhere like that in Mexico, like in a car park, everyone's eating off the hood of their cars, and you think that sounds so great, it's sort of a romance to it. Imagine if that was in England.

Oh, that would be horrendous. I wouldn't go near that place. Absolutely not. Must be joking. Garage pork. Yeah. Yeah, we wouldn't pull it off. Yeah.

Eating a sausage on a Ford Focus. Awful. That bit. He's found it. He's found it. He's found it. He's found it. So good.

Straight to A&E after this. Oh my God. So, yeah, Tacos El Paso from there. What else are we going to have? Oh, the pork tamales from, actually an Ecuadorian restaurant in London. If you haven't been, you must go. It's called El Inca Plebeio. It's on Essex Road.

Okay. Really good. And they do pork tamales like wrapped in corn husks and with just like the most soft succulent pork stuffed inside. And it's just unbelievable. And it comes with like a green coriander. salsa with lime and it's just sensational. So that's going to be there too. And then also like a really good wacamole, like the best one you've ever had with like warm plantain sweet potato and

cassava crisps. Oh my God. Yeah. And that's it. No, no, no. And the perfect margarita. Mezcalita actually. I'm quite specific about my margaritas. Short glass again. Yeah. On the rocks. Hate margaritas in the, what they called? Big cup. Big cups. I know what you mean. You know like when they bring it to you and it's not. but it's not on the rocks and it's in a... Yeah. Like a margarita glass. Yeah.

You know? Yeah. Yeah. You don't like that like you. So short glass on the rocks. Mezcal, like a bit smoky. I really don't like it too sweet. So I actually prefer it with a bit of honey rather than agave, but like hardly any.

And absolutely no Quintra or TripleSec. I hate Quintra and TripleSec. God I'm saying a lot of hate. Anyway. And a bit of spice. Yeah. So that's my starter. I know it's a lot, but I've got the power.

No, I respect it. I've got the power to not be... It's good. It's very specific. It all sounds delicious. Are you having one of each of them and then you're sharing all this with a bunch of other people? Yeah, I think you have to share this kind of food. I don't want to be sitting by myself in a car park. Are the liver lovers there? The liver's, yeah. I do love the liver lovers. They're there. But no liver yet in the starter. We had it for the bread.

The bread. Yeah, yeah. Nothing knocking around in the... No liver here. No, I don't need liver here. Oh, I forgot. I also want a really good saviche on the table. Lever savićo? Nope. Definitely not. Definitely not a liver savica. That would be horrible. Yes. Even for a liver lover like me. What savibece do you want?

I do like just like a bream savichia, that kind of thing. Or any sort of like whatever is like the local fresh seasonal fish of the moment from the sea right there. So wherever I am a freshly caught fish. I like it when it's just like tossed? What am I talking about? What is it called when you put it in the line juice? It's not cure. What is wrong with me? I actually know what it's called, so I'm...

Yeah, I run out of ideas. Maybe it's just cured. But I thought cured with the salt, really, I... Marinated. There we go. We could just say marinated in lime juice, but really quickly, like not too long. Onions, tomatoes, coriander, lime, like chilies. I want it pretty simple, like a simple, really fresh, lymie, salty savagetit with all of those crisps, the cassava, sweet potato and plantain.

and the guacamole. And it's like, it's hot, but it's not too hot. Yeah. Probably on a beach. The water's lapping in, bare feet, water's laughing in, but the sand is not bothering you. Like, the sand is there, but it's not getting in your crack or, like, pissing you off.

That would be, that would be an issue. Even when you, to be honest, even when you said bare feet and the water's lapping, I thought, that's going to get on my nerves. Do you think? Would that get on your nerves? Personally, yeah, yeah. Oh, have you ever done that? Like, table on the beach, not so close that it's like,

like waves, but like just like a little, every now and then it's a, yeah, but even just being on the beach on a table, have you like, no. No, do you not like that? And it's got to be under. No, but this is. Well, the legs like, sinking to the sand. Not, I mean, you have, it has to be like a bit further away from, have you never eaten on the beach?

No, no, I have eaten on the beach. You don't sink. I mean, you could. You definitely could. But. Probably eating an ice cream on the beach. I think once in your lifetime, James, you should eat. at a table on the beach.

With the water laughing around your bare feet. It sounds great, but you're talking about it like it's a common experience. Well, it's not a, no, it's definitely not a common experience. But can I ask for one more wish? Yes. Yes. So, we're on the beach. It's really hot, but it's not too hot.

It's like the perfect level of heat. The water's lapping, but it's not annoying. The sand is there, but you can't, it's not annoying. Yeah. And also your ass isn't sticking to the plastic chairs. Oh, okay. So it's just all perfect. Is that the wish that your ass doesn't stick to the plastic chairs?

Because the reality is when you do it, on the beach, all those things like, Sandy's getting in your toes and your cracks, your arse is sticking to the plastic, it's too hot, and the water's probably pissing you off. Do you think that's the first time anyone's ever asked a genie for the wish of, I wish my ass didn't stick

to plastic chairs? Yeah, surely. Probably. Probably. Surely most genius aren't getting that one. Oh my God, I only get one more wish. I just realised. Maybe. Yeah. That's how it works, right? Three wishes? Well, maybe your other wish should be

that no one gets washed off a rock. True in this meal, because you're really... Or if they do get washed off a rock, they will find themselves on a deserted island and be rescued. Yeah. Yeah, because I think you're skating a bit close to the... You could also, because it's your dream meal, not be sat on a plastic chair. That is so smart. I didn't think about that loophole.

That is really smart. You're clever. Yeah, no, I'm a clever guy. Yeah. Now, what is the most comfortable chair to sit on that's not sticky? See, this is the problem with sitting on the beach, isn't it? If it's warm, most chairs, there's going to be some stickage. But you're right that I don't, I could just ask for a lot of plastic chair.

Maybe just a nice wooden chair. Wooden chair? No slats. Wouldn't share, nice lap? A little cushion, right? No, not on the beach. You'll get wet and sandy. No, it won't because of my wish. Yeah.

So yeah, maybe a wooden chair with a cushion. Okay. Perfect. My dream main course. Can I have a pasta course, please? Yeah. Thank you. It is my dream meal.

Yeah. So my favourite pastor in the world is a pasta called Pinna la Laconezerzee. So it's made in the village above where I, used to live as a kid. And they've been making this pasta recipe for like 50 years, I think. It's a secret recipe. And people from all around the air always come for lunch and dinner there. It's like a site of pilgrimage. It's honestly the most delicious pasta sauce in the world. And it's kind of like creamy, tomatoy, peppery, porky, porcini-e. And like, it's all of those things, but it's also like so much more. I don't know.

I can't. It's like it's a secret recipe that people are obsessed with. Like people who live around there will literally go there for dinner, like, twice a week for like 50 years. Really? So they'll just, like, have it all the time. It's so good. Everyone always starts their meal with, well, they'll get like Christina or like antipasti first. Then they'll get Pinelaconez because you always have a pasta course. And then you go on to, and then you're like either have a second course or a pizza. Like, Italian's a mental.

I don't know how they eat that much and like still look so good. It's Olivier. See the adverts? They eat loads of Olivia and that's why they. What olive oil? No, no, no, the spread, the butter replacement spread. Oh, no. I've got olive oil in it.

Italians don't eat butter replacement spread. I do, that's why. Have you seen the advert? That is not the secret to their longevity. I'm telling you that margarine. They're not allowed to lie on adverts. Oh, is that so? They eat loads of Olivia and that's why they look so good.

They eat back of replacement spread. I look so good. Well, there you go. That's the secret. Yeah. Maybe we should all start plastering that on our skin if we want to live forever. Although that is a curse. Yeah, that is a curse.

That's a curse. You turn into a puppet. Yeah. Anyway, so I want that pasta. Yeah, that sounds great. That sounds so good. There's there like lumps of meat in it. It's like tiny.

It's not like a ragu with like mincy pieces. It's like the tiniest like speckles of pork. And like the sauce is like luscious and velvety. And it just like coats the penny in the most. It's insane. Like it's the best pasta I've ever had. I've had it. I've been having it all my life like since I was two.

And it's always the same, which means it's always perfect. And it's just it's life changing. How often do you get to have it now? I had it a couple of months ago on my birthday, which was very nice. Happy birthday. Thank you. It was in April, but I appreciate that. And then before that, oh no, actually, I've had it three years in a row for the last three years.

But then before that I hadn't been back for a few years. So like once every few years I have it. So it's even better now because you get into, it's spaced out. You're not having it all the time. Yeah. You know, it's so good. It's a tiny little village. And it's so good that as you enter the village, there's a big sign that says,

Paizzi Natale de lepééééééé. Pinilla Lacorniza, which means like birthplace of pinna la Cornezzan. Wow. Like it has a, anyway. So at least you know they're never going to change the menu. Yeah, no, they never will. Because they can't change the sign. And they'll never tell anyone the secret.

Have you ever tried to recreate it at home? I have, but like versions of it. I've never like tried to like get it exactly right because that's pointless. It's perfect and I'm never going to be able to. But like it has inspired various recipes I've done. So your actual main course then? Oh, this was honestly one of the hard. This whole exercise has.

been one of the hardest thing like it's like Sophie's choice. Well, you're naming it so far. Yeah. It all sounds delicious. And also what you've done is not really, you've just sort of said everything. Yeah, but I actually, yes, but also I have gone in one direction for my mains, but then I would like to talk about other options. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.

Right. So we're going to stick in Tuscany for the mains. Lovely. And I'm just going to, I think I'm going to have like a rabbit porquetta. Have you ever had one of those? Never, didn't even know that was, I mean, obviously I knew it was possible because you can put two things together, but that just sounds absolutely incredible. It is, I mean, it's not a rabbit and a porcetta put together.

So, like, Porcetta is obviously, like, rolled pork. But you can also, even though that word is used to describe pork, you can also use it to describe a rabbit roll. So it's basically, like, a whole deboned rabbit. And they usually, like, stuff it with, like, sage, sometimes with chicken liver, loads of garlic, anchovies, pepper, lemon, or olive, all, that kind of thing. And then roll it up, kind of like a porquetta. and then like slow roast it and just like, oh my God.

And it's like crispy and crackly around the edge and just like super moist. And I mean, I love a porketta. It's one of my favorite things in the world. But I feel like a rabbit porketta is just like, just slightly. How well does a rabbit roll? I was struggling to imagine. Because like with a big bit of pork, like you can have a big square bit, right?

But if you're deboning a whole rabbit, does it look like a sort of rabbit rug? Okay. honest and I've never actually done it myself. I have seen it get. So imagine, people aren't going to want to imagine. People don't want to imagine. They're going to have to live with it. People can skip this bit if they don't want to hear it. Trigger warning, skip this bit if you don't want to hear about raw rabbit carpets. Raw rabbit. You've said it now. I thought that that was too descriptive for trigger warning. Yeah. I don't think you can get much worse than that, really. Yeah. If you are triggered by that stuff, too late.

Yeah, it's too late. Probably should be listening to this. this podcast because you never know what you're going to hear. Yeah, exactly. I'm now just triggered just generally. I'm just imagining now Benito and a rabbit in a roar off. Oh, that would be cute. The rabbits don't roar. Well, neither does Benito.

Yeah, I think it's still beat Benito in a roar. So, imagine a deboned rabbit. Okay. Let's say he's lying that way with his sort of head in his feet that way. Then you kind of want to, you would roll him not like this, but like that. Does that make sense? No. Head down.

No? So kind of it would, it wouldn't be really long. Left to the right. It would only end up being, so like if you deboned a rabbit, it would probably be like that long. Yeah. It was like a decent size rabbit. But then you would kind of roll it the other way. From the bum to the head.

Yeah. Yeah. So then it would only end up being about that long. Yes, got you. It wouldn't be like, you could do it that way. But you want the layers in there rather than that. You want the rabbit roll. As you said, yes.

There's actually, did you guys watch the, what's it, the Stanley Tucci, Italy. show that just came out. In one of the episodes, he goes to like the home of where, like, a Coronato where they make lardo. Did you watch that episode? No, no. Anyway, he visits this lady who teaches him how to make this famous dish from that colonato region. And it's rabbit, a deboned rabbit, layered with loads of lardo, which they just, like, get out of this, like, beautiful, like stone marble. Not, not stone, salt, marble, you know, where they keep.

cure it. So, deboned rabbit, layers of lardo and then just rolled up and apparently the lardo just like melts into the rabbit and just like makes it the most moist, crackly, delicious thing. So maybe I'll put some lardo in there. Yeah, stick a bit of lardo in there for God's sake.

Why not? Cutts you of the two. So, a rabbit porquetta, a really good salsa verde. A really good aeoli, which is not something you would usually have with a rabbit porquetta in Tuscany, but I make the rules here.

So I'm also going to have a peppercorn sauce with it because again I make the rules. I like sauces. Love peppercorn sauce more than life itself. I like them too creamy. I actually make them with like egg yolks and ghee, which sounds a bit gross, but without cream and it's like fucking good.

It's like a kind of like a, I actually, it's kind of like a high protein version. Not that I'm trying to do high protein recipes. Finally, someone's made a high protein peppercorn sauce. Not that I'm trying to achieve that. Finally, a sauce that will let me keep my gains. Pour that all over a steak. Peppercorn sauce for bros.

But it's actually a really good recipe and it's super easy. You just put some melted ghee, a couple of egg yolks, lots of different peppercorns because I like, you know, mixed peppercorns, a bit of mustard, salt, I could put like a bit of black garlic in there as well, a bit of curry powder, and then just use an immersion blender. And like within seconds, you have this beautiful, like, like emulsified, delicious sauce that doesn't have double room in it. Dream sites.

Dream sites. So, Tuscan roast potatoes, like, I really don't like English-style rose potatoes. Okay. Okay. Here we go. You better turn off your mentions for about a week. I know, I know. This will be the clip we put out because it'll get a lot of engagement.

This is where people will be asking me who the hell do you think you are. Yeah, yeah. More so than the prawns. You're getting that a lot. There's one clip we have that still gets loads of engagement and is Ellie Taylor. saying that she doesn't go to Italian restaurants because she can do it better at home. And it is, it is constant comment.

That is sacrilegious. I don't know that. Does she really think that? Yeah, I think so. She's being genuine. But there's so many Italian people in the comments now. I mean, fair enough. They go, just because something says it's an Italian restaurant,

it doesn't mean it's properly Italian. Great. True. One person said, the amount of people who haven't had proper Italian food is genuinely scary. Genuinely scary. See, sometimes it's worth food in a lot of, comments. They're funny.

Do you ever, you don't have Instagram, do you? Do you ever read the comments? Well, now we're on YouTube. I can see the comments. Really funny. So someone straight away was just saying like, just complaining to Benito about the quality of the picture. Yeah. And can you please fix this, please?

Really? And they're very disappointed. Disappointed. Don't know if they use that work. Yeah. I thought it was very funny. Yeah. No, they were very, they were like, I feel like I have to raise this. Yeah. I mean, I know people say this. the time, but honestly, people have

so much time on their hands that they can just like spend time commenting, telling you that they're disappointed than quality. You should be doing a better job, though. You should be doing a better job. He's doing a lot of YouTube. No, man, it's good quality. I can assume we have blurry faces, because it is crisp quality. So you don't like, so talk us

through why you don't like English, our beautiful English roast potatoes. That we eat in our car park. Garage potatoes. Please tell me why you hated Her Majesty, the Queen. Yes, may she less. She was only okay. Fair enough.

English-style roast potato. I just don't get what all the fuss is about. There's so much like, yeah, it's crispy on the outside sometimes. Usually they're just a bit flaccid, like not that crispy. So much fat. You have to like almost like scold yourself like get a vat of like burning fat and make sure it's like. And then like, yeah, it's kind of crispy.

It's not that flavoursome. And then there's just like so much fluff inside. Now, if you think about a Tuscan style roast potato, do you know what I mean when I say like a, like they're like they're like, there's like that. like smaller skin on, like squares. I wouldn't say waxy, but like really garlicy, really rosemary, super salty and just like golden brown, olive oily, like there's so much smaller, so there's so much more surface area to get, you know,

roasty, toasty, crispy caramelised. And there's so much garlic and rosemary in there and like a bit of lemon on top. Does that sound good. English-style roast potatoes are just like, whatever. I will never slag off the English roast potato I think it's a wonderful thing I will say sometimes people take it too far

did go somewhere the other day for lunch it was a very lovely lunch they brought the roast potatoes and if you chucked one of those roast potatoes at the window you would have been done for criminal damage because it was like you couldn't get into it that's the thing most of the time they're either like

kind of flaccid and the crispy bit has gone a bit like not soggy but just like me or they're like so hard that you can't even cut into them We're all chasing that memory of the best one we had. Well, I'm chasing the memory of the best Italian-style potato. Sure. But we just make them at home.

Yeah, but that's the thing. But that's the thing. You can just make them at home. They're so easy. You don't need to parboil, peel them, parboil them, fluff them, like burn your arms with scalding fat. Listen, yeah. This is why we won the war.

You know, we just keep our heads down. We don't need to bring that up. Not an episode goes by. It doesn't bring up. Not the bloody warring. Sorry. No, I know. It is a lot of fath.

But I like the pouring them into the hot fat and they're sizzling everywhere. Yeah, fair enough. Is it a case? If you're in a kitchen quite a lot working, you don't necessarily want, when you're at home making roast potatoes to... 100%. I am very, like, I cook so much that when there's a shortcut or when there's a quicker way of doing something, I'm 100% going to take it.

I love a food processor. I don't want to peel things. I don't want to pre-boil. I hardly ever parboil. I'm parboiling. So boring. Like, come on. Like shortcuts, if it still tastes great, 100% for them. Yeah. And you just literally just chop them up. I mean, wash them a little bit. That's it. That's all you need to do. Skin on, chop them up. Loads of olive oil, really hot oven. Bob's your uncle. Nice.

Roberto is your uncle. Yeah. Respect. Respect to Roberto. So those potatoes, I know that's not the last of your sides, because I know you've got a few. No. I want a really. really good tomato salad. Just quite simple. Just really like the best tomato you've ever had or I've ever had.

You don't want the best one we've ever had. You don't trust us? The best one we've ever had will be rubbish. No, no, no, no. I do trust. I bet you guys know a good tomato. I would say I very rarely had a good tomato. So you're probably right to go with the best one you've ever had.

No, the best one we've ever had. So like the average. Combine the average. It will be the best one you've ever had. I think even if you combine those. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A combined average best tomato salad. Yeah, yeah.

Like a roasted and raw artichoke salad, really, like, lemony with some, like, pecorino and herbs. Yeah. And then some sauteed, garlicky. What do you call it in English? That chimidapa, you know, that green, it's like slightly bitter. You get an Italian, can you look up what's that called? What's that called? What's that called?

What's that called? What's that called in English? It's like greens. I don't think it's just greens. There's some things that are just greens, right? You definitely would have had it at an Italian restaurant. Yeah. Well, some sort of like sauteed, garlicky, olive oily, lemony green.

Yes. Bitter. Slightly bitter, not too bitter. But yeah, it is it. Chard? It's kind of giving chard, but a bit more bitter and not as like watery. Okay. It's giving chard.

Write that one down the easy. Kind of. It's more giving like not chickory, but like the chickory leaves. Do you know what I mean? Right. No, you guys don't look like you know what I mean. I know chikery. Broccoli rub.

Oh, great, yeah, yeah. It's one of Andy Bernard's friends from the office. That's it for my dream main, but I have some honourable muncheons, if I may. Sure, let's do them. Like a whole dim sum feast. Nice. Just all of it, but specifically prawn chung fun and stir-fried turnip cakes. Oh, yeah.

I love turnip cakes. Have you had the ones from Tao Tau Tazoo where they're like in little bits and like stir-fried with bits of, is it the choice I'm or morning glory I can't remember I can't go in there anymore because James dropped me in it I did it dropped you in the lot I absolutely did it in the early days of this podcast I shouted out to out Tao Jou for their

wasabi king prawns right up your street yeah and then I gave him such a big shout out and then I went in again and I had them and I was like I've changed the sauce they've changed the wasabi sauce it's not as good and I had it a couple of times I was like that's a permanent change this is bad I've told everyone to come in so then and I never would have to be

do this now. But it was the early days of the pod. So I was like, it came up again. And I was like, you just, they've changed it. It's not as good anymore. You said that on the pod? Yeah, said it on the pod. You wait for this. And then what happened? Then I went in there again. And the way it came home and I ordered them. I was like, yeah, still not great. Okay. What, you said that to him? No, I was thinking that to myself. Then the waiter came over and went, I had other prawns. He gave you another one. He said, how do you like them? Oh.

They nice? And I was like, uh-oh. So I thought I just need to be... You think they spat in it? No, no. I don't think... Taduio shi, it's spitting food. No, no, no, no.

But I think you'd heard the pod. So I was like, uh, and I went to one. So I think I probably even did say to him, well, it's not as a wasabi as it used to be. But he said, and he's shown me his phone. And it was the episode. And he went, putting it at the screen,

he went, Gamble said that there's not enough wasabi in it anymore. Gamble said that we've changed the recipe. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. Yes, he did. That is absolutely gold. I'm sorry that Gamble said that.

I've not been in there since. That's hilarious. Well done, James. And now I want these turnip cakes, but I can't go in, because Gamble's had I changed the rest of it. But now that I think about it, there is somewhere else

that you can go for really good stirre fired turnic cakes. Thank you. We've been to Phoenix Palace in Baker Street. I can't go in there anymore. What? What happened there? No, I've not been. You must.

You absolutely must. And their stirfired turnic cakes are sensation. So that's one of my honourable mansions, but also my, like, a really good Cantonese rose duck with morning glory. Window duck. Yeah, window duck.

But I don't really like the idea of it being in the window. I love the idea of it being in the window. Really? You're telling me I'm eating the duck from the window? I feel starstruck. Yeah. That's like getting the clothes for the mannequin. There we go.

Look at all that expression. Yeah, I know. That's the first time I found anything funny. And then my final honourable muncheon, oh, I've got two more, lasagna, the best lasagna ever, our combined average of a best lasagna ever. Well, my best lasagna ever is the one you made. Oh, that's really, oh my God.

So what am I? No, but I actually don't want it to be a prawn lasagna. So maybe just are combined. If yours is a prawn lasagna and mine's got pork and beef in it, that means if we combine it all, that's going to be. Pork beef and prawn mack. Pork, pork beef and prawn lasagna.

not be delicious? We're just thinking about it now. Okay, so, pork, beef and prawn lasagna, loads of layers. Yeah. Not too sloppy, but not too dry.

Crispy on the edges. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's it. I love lasagna. I love lasagna. Lazzania actually maybe would just be

my every course, but I haven't picked it for any of my courses. But it is right up there on the third Honourable Munchin. What do you think about Garfield? I don't really,

No, he loves a lasagna. I know he hates Mondays. That's pretty much the whole character. That's pretty... I know he's lazy. Yeah, he's lazy. Yeah. That's all I know.

What do you think about Garfield? I love him. I think... You identify. Me and Garfield should be in a lasagna lover's WhatsApp group. You probably would actually eat loads of lasagna with him, unlike me. He probably wouldn't post very often on the WhatsApp group because he's lazy. Yeah.

True. We always be having Garfield. Come on. Especially not on Monday. Not on Monday. It's absolutely silent. Yeah. Garfield, everything all right, buddy?

Thumbs down and everything. Yeah, not even red. Buddy, you've got to stop this. Bums down. This is a lasagna lovers group. We're trying to keep things positive. I want to be part of that group. Yeah, well, there you go.

Three of us on there. I'd love lasagna. I want to be on there, thank you. Who doesn't love lasagna? Only psychedats. I think globally if you, well, maybe not globally, I was going to, Europe-wide, if you said, what's the best food?

I reckon lasagna would win. Do you think? Could do. Have you guys ever done a poll? Benito, shaking his head, but he isn't no. Benito, you must have the number. because you've asked so many people what your favorite food is. But no one would pick it as officially as their dream thing on this podcast, I don't think.

Not many people have, but as a go-to, what's your favorite food? What do you want to eat tonight? I reckon the majority of people would say lasagna. I reckon the food that the least amount of people turn down would be lasagna, number one. No one says no to it. Yeah. No, apart from what we don't eat pasta. Yes.

Dream drink. So I did have my mescalita. Yes. So that is... That's locked in. Yeah, that's locked in for the start up. And then for this main situation, I'm going to go for a chilled red, which I feel like is just a bit of an obvious thing these days.

It's very real housewives of Clapton. Yeah. Yeah. But it's good. So good. So good. So like a light chilled red is what I would like. A specific red? Yes, actually.

Seeing as you're asking. I like it. when James sounds like an actual waiter, just always tickles me. A specific red? Yeah. There's a producer called Mataburo, which is on the French border with Spain.

I think it's in France, but it's like basically in Spain. I should probably get this right. And they have a wine called Edwan, I-D-O-I-N-E. And it is absolutely sensational. Like the first time I drunk it, the first time I tried it,

I was with a bunch of friends. We were all just like gobsmacked at how delicious it was. So I want that. Is it, is it natural? It is natural, but not like I, I, I sensed the, the way you asked that. No, I like, you know, I went through that phase. No, no, I'm also not really a massive fan of, like, super funky, yeah, yeah, natural wines, like, yeah.

I like them. Do you? Yeah. Yeah. It can go too far into it. I'm not a wine connoisseur in general. So for me, whenever I'm having wine, it's just like rare that I'm having a glass of wine. So whatever it is, I'm like, it's a novelty.

So if I'm having a natural wine. wine, it's as exciting as if I'm having that. Yeah. No, there's really nice natural wines, but you're right, there's some that are just like super, super funky and... I don't, yeah. Bit, there's bits in it. No, I don't want if it's super funky and super sour and, like,

vinegary. Like, I'm just not that adventurous, a bit boring. But this one is, like, highly quaffable. I didn't want to say that, but it is... I don't tell you didn't want to say it. Yeah. I was like, trying to think of another word, what's another word? It's the only one.

Quaffable. It's the only one. So good. So, yeah, that's, and that's going to go really one. well with the rabbit porketa with the aoli and the salsa vidida and the popcorn sauce and the tomatoes and the potato oh my god do you find that because you're a chef when you're putting this like a even though it's a hypothetical menu together that you are thinking like okay if i'm serving this what goes with that what goes with that i need i need a bit of this i need something like that are you

thinking a bit differently to how other guests might think about it i guess so i do want everything to be perfectly balanced and when i say perfectly balanced for me i need it to be like super salty and super sour. So, like, I want loads of lemon and loads of salt on the table. And I want loads of sauces. I want, like, something herbie and I want maybe something a bit garlicky, something creamy. So, yeah, I guess I do think about that, put things making sense together. Yeah.

Well, I mean, when you're describing your main course, I was like, this seems to be a proper meal that you could get. Well, isn't that the point? Some people don't take that as the point. That is not what everyone does. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No? When you were describing it, I was like, oh yeah, I could... No, but I would very gladly have that whole situation as my main,

but with also a Cantonese roast duck and a prawn chung fund and stir-fried ternicap. I'm like, I mean, ideally, can I have that? Can that all be part? Does it have to be an honorable mansion? No, I think you've already called them out as Honourable Mansions. And you've already got the Mexican platter upon platter for your starter. I think it's a...

But why? We've just complimented you saying it was very well balanced, and you're trying to chuck a roast duck on top of it. Why would you not want to... I do think that there is an argument that in the future, we should do like some one-off little episodes that are like banquet specials where we just let someone have a proper medieval feast of whatever they want on the whole table. And we'll just see how long that episode runs for.

Dream dessert. I don't like this. What? You're just eating like but tons of food and then we get to the dessert. If you're going to... And you're not full, remember, as well. I'm not full. You're a savoury this.

I'm just kidding. Don't you worry. Of course I'm having your dessert. Yanking your chain. Jesus Christ, I felt free. You got me back for shouting pop up on. That's it. I got a bigger fright than you do.

No, I'm going to have both, actually. So for dessert. Is it okay to pick one of my own recipes? Yeah. Okay. Just so you know, I think you're the first person to do it. How does that make you feel? No, loads of people have created their own thing.

Oh, but not. I think first chef to do it, I think. But yeah, I think you absolutely choose one of your own recipes. You should be back in your own stuff and being like this is the most delicious thing. Well, I did make... Okay, so actually, it started with an ice cream that I used to love as a kid.

Did you ever have a winner taco? A winner taco? Oh, my God. Okay. So in Italy, they're like... It's an ice cream in a shell. In like a hard shell. Like a wafer shell.

And then it's like filled with ice cream, then dipped in... It has like caramel-y swells and then dipped in chocolate and nuts. I know the one you're talking about. So it's like... You know, like a hard... shell taco, but like a wafer.

And I just fucking love those as a child. And then they just disappeared. They, like, discontinued. I was like, what the fuck? So then, a few years ago, I was like, well, I could just make my own. And also, it's called a choco taco taco, so why not? It should be made out of an actual taco, like a corn tortilla. So I took, like, a soft corn tortilla and then, like, brushed it in, like, melted butter

and then, like, baked it. And it kind of ended up tasting, like, a jorned. giant crunchy nut cornflake. So to begin with that, when you're creating this, are you just doing the shells on the right? Are you like, first things first, I've got to sort the shell? Yes. And then you're doing that.

And you're like, how many two you got it right? You can't start with the ice cream in that. No, no, no, no, you can't start. This was a process. Let me tell you. You cannot start with the ice cream. No, it took me so many times to like, so what I ended up doing is like,

so the tortilla at first when you put it in, it's like bathed in butter and maple syrup. So it's quite like floppy and wet. So I hung it over like the racks of an oven. Yeah. Can you picture it? Yes. And then it like baked and caramelized like that in that shape.

So it was like a hard shell taco but made out of corn. Whereas, you know, originally they're just like not wafer, but like just wheat biscuit. Anyway, so it's like giant crunchy nut cornflake and then like brush with loads of chocolate inside. Because fucking love chocolate. Milk chocolate, dark chocolate? Somewhere in between. Great. Like maybe like 55.

560% something like that. Brexit. Well? Nearly Brexit. Brexit. Brexit. Brexit chocolate. I know that was 4852, but it was specifically not Brexit chocolate.

It felt so close it might have to be a Brexit. Sorry. That's okay. So then there's the chocolate. There's the Brexit, not Brexit chocolate. Yeah, yeah. And then the ice cream I did inside was like a kind of a coffee, miso maple cinnamon ice cream with like

miso maple caramel swirls. So that goes inside. Great. And then you dip it, like you dip the edge in chocolate again. Yeah. Same chocolate. Same chocolate. Brexit chocolate.

No, I don't want to be quite with that. Not just 55 to 60%. Is that nerve wracking when you dip it? Oh, it's quite fun to kind of do it. So you've got the bowl of melted chocolate and you kind of have to go like that. Like a pirate ship of the theme part. Exactly. That's a perfect description, James. Wow. That was really good.

Thank you. You're good with words and stuff. You really are. Do you re-freeze it so the ice cream doesn't drop out? Yes. I forgot that step. Smart. Yeah. So fill it. So I put the ice cream in a, like, made the ice cream. Then you don't want to set it until it's like super hard. But like put it into a piping bag. And like when it's at the perfect level of frozen that you can kind of pipe it, then you pipe it into the shell. And it's like a thick layer of chocolate inside, not just like a... thin brush. Then you pipe the ice cream in, and then you're right.

Then you have to like freeze it again, so the ice cream sets, and then you dip it in the chocolate, and then in loads of caramelised nuts. So annoyed we can't eat this. Yeah, that sounds absolutely amazing. Yeah, how did you find out? It has found a photo of it. It looks absolutely incredible. Actually, if you go to the right, you can see the dip.

My God. There's like a dip, the pirate ship dip. Oh, yeah, look at this. It's great. We're just scrolling through. Oh, yeah. Piping in the ice. Ice cream.

This is the best. Oh yeah, and it had nuts in the ice cream as well and caramel. You know when you know when you know instinctively that you look at something, you go, if I tried that, it would be a fucking disaster. It would be such a mess. But you really can only do a few at a time because it is a nightmare to make. And I did put it on a menu somewhere that I did a residency for and it didn't turn out. Like it's something that you need to do on a small scale.

Like it just, it's, anyway, but it's so good. Yeah. And I want that. Not made by me though. I want someone else to make it. Who do you want to make it? I mean, obviously the genie can make it, but you can have any, you could have... I think I'd like the genie to make it.

I'm looking that's the kind of thing that first try, I'd nail it, and then I'd never do it well again. I'll be so focused on the first guy. Yeah. That somehow it'd be... And there'd be luck involved in this as well, yeah. And then I'd never be able to do it again. Yeah.

I mean, I haven't really done it since. It's a pain in the ass. So that's why I would want you, the genie to make it. Pleasure. Thank you. I will be eating them as well. go, so it's going to take a while for you to get one. They're just so crunchy.

And you know, when you have a cornetto and the best bit at the end is like the big chunk of chocolate that has a bit of ice cream on top, like, you've got that all the way through because like the chocolate's like the layer of chocolate inside is thick. They've started selling those on their own, haven't they? The bottoms of the cornetto. Shut up. I saw it somewhere in a bank. In your dreams?

It's typical. But I was like, I don't, weirdly, I didn't want it. No, no, no. because you want, like, it's the reward for having finished. This is this new generation. Yeah, they don't want to do any work. They just want to get straight to the tip. On holiday last week,

yes. My partner got a Calipo. Put it in what... Orange. Put it, well, fair enough. No, keep going. Put it in what she thought was the freezer in the Airbnb. It wasn't.

It was the fridge. Then she came back to it was like, oh, it's all melted now. And I was like, that's the best bit is at the end of the Calipo when it's all juice. She's like, I don't want to just this. Do you want it? And I was like, actually, I don't. And I really learned something about myself. Wow, that is one of the worst stories you've ever told.

What? That's good story. If you tell that story, it's got to end with you drinking it. That's a good story. So what, you just put it back in the fridge and left it. We actually located the freezer and put it in there. Oh, here's a story. Here's the end of the story.

Okay. When we left the Airbnb, we realized we still don't know how it was in the freezer. So no one had the Calipo. Or whoever was in the Airbnb next, I imagine. Now that's the good story, imagining who ate your Calippo. Like it could have been anyone. Yeah. They would have found it in there.

I'd imagine the owner of the Airbnb probably. Or the next. Did a quick scan. Oh yeah. Just a quick little. Johnny, if you're listening, I hope you enjoyed it, brother. Johnny? Yeah, Johnny.

It's his name. Johnny, I hope you enjoy the Clipo. And just like, I didn't have the heart to write this on the feedback, but you text way too frequently. and we could have done with hearing less of you. Oh God, I really hope he was listening. Yeah. Learn a thing or two about boundaries.

Yeah. Fucking hell, he doesn't care that guy. It's constant. Then asks you at the end to give him a good review. Did he text you asking for a good review? What's happened to me? No. What was he texting you throughout the trip?

It kept on being like, how are you today? I've had that before. Anything I can do today? Everything's all right? Everything's fine, Johnny. All good. All good here. Okay.

Are you going to leave a good review? Well, time will tell. Time will tell. You said maybe something savory as well, but... I mean, I would like cheese as well. Yeah, sure. I'm almost full at this point. Thank you, Jeannie.

Almost satisfied. Almost satisfied. Yeah, that's right. Not full. Yeah. Almost satisfied, but I will have cheese. And I do like sheep cheeses. They're my favorite sort of variety.

Like a Spenwood. And I did have like a kind of... It was basically like a cammon bear, but made out of sheep. And I don't know what it's called, but it was fucking delicious. So I'd like that. And a really good cheddar, like a very mature, grainy, crunchy cheddar. Maybe a Conte. Is it Conte or Conte?

Conte. With an M. Yeah, one of those. And then I am a fan of like fruit, sweet and cheese, fruit and cheese. So I would like crazy, I know. Absolutely bonkers. First person to put it together. But in Brazil we have cheese with guava, like a guava paste,

which is quite similar to like Membrio. What's that? Quince. So I want that. So like guava, cheese, maybe some like fruity nutty crackers, but not like a water cracker. No, that is a bit, yeah, I'm not, I'm not into that. Or like those, no, any of those like Jacobs crackers

or a water cracker horrendous, no. I like the digestive one. We've talked about this before. Well, they basically are, but in like a big box of crackers, like a selection box. Yeah. There's always one that's in the shape of a life. and it has hovis written on it.

And it's basically a digestive. Oh, I've never tried that. And you put, like, a really mature cheddar onto a digestive. Really good. I love a little hunk of cheddar now. I'm starving. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, sorry. I was meant to make it so that you never get full and then get full at the end and now you're starving. Yeah. It's true. It's a curse. You fail. It's a curse.

I don't mean you back to you now. See how you feel about it. Please. Some of this aren't won't be able to say. You would like cold, sparkling water from a babbling brook. Shout out May Martin with a short glass and three, standard size ice cubes in it and a medium amount of lime juice. It's perfect.

You would like chicken liver crustini from the co-op in Rafina? Rufina. Yep. Starter. He'll never go again. Mexican feast for your starter. Jamie Flamins to Stada. Raw Benito.

Al Paso Tacos from El Vilsito. Pork tamales from El Inca plebeo. Which is Ecuadorian. Yep. James, you did the thing that basically every British man does where you can't pronounce something so you just give a bit of hand. You just threw a bit of hand in and sort of that might help. A bit of a bit of a gesture at the end.

Svecce, some guac and mescalita and a mescalita. Pasta. Duh. This is going terribly. Pene alaconezese. Alaconellae. Penae alaconesse. Do the hands.

Penny, oh look at this. Main, rabbit porcetta, with salsa verde, aoli, peppercorn sauce, protein rich, peppercorn sauce. Side a Tuscan, rose potatoes, tomato salad, sauteed greens. Drink chilled red. Yeah, baby. Desert. Those tacos, which are the best tacos ever, your own recipe, I'll make them. And a bunch of cheese shit.

and cheese and crackers and stuff. It doesn't really matter what they are. And guava. And guava and stuff. A bunch of cheese shit. You'd eat the guava. Huh? You'd eat the guava.

Do you not like cheese at all? No, I do. I do. I would have... You'd have the cheese course. I would have some cheese, for sure. Especially, I keep thinking about, like, and I know you don't like truffles, you'd hate it.

There's truffle breed I had, and I just kept up. Well, no, actually, you know, I don't mind a truffle-bris. I just don't like truffle-scented things. Like synthetic truffle. Fair enough. How do you feel about that menu? I feel really good about it, but I do feel like it's missing

roast duck lasagna and prawn chung fun. It is. And stir-fried turnic cake, so we'll just add those in. Yeah, well, you can have that for yourself. Yeah. You know, I mean... But this is for myself.

Yeah, yeah. We'll give you a takeaway bag on the way out. Okay. We're kicking out the restaurant now, but you can have a takeaway bag with all those things in. And you can eat them on the way home. I don't want a takeaway bag.

No, you get them. No, at the same time. But it's a takeaway bag on a lot. I think, I'm afraid. Well, I'll take the takeaway bag then. Well, thank you very much. Thanks very much. Thanks for coming to the Dream Restaurant Easter.

Thank you so much for having me. It's been the honour of my life. Oh, finally. Someone says it. There we go, James. Oh, Benito's tummy is growling. Yeah, that's funny, isn't it? It was a nice menu, so I can understand why you're talking about me growling.

But he held it. He held it like he was having a contraction. Yes. Yes, he was very worried about it. He couldn't believe it. Benito's waters have just broken. Yeah, he wasn't all relaxed like, I don't know, Zaltzman, Andy Zaltzman. Andy Zaltzman.

I mean, Zoltzman must just be rumbling 24-7. It didn't face him at all. Benito just looked at us there, all worried and scared like he was going to die. Yeah, oh no, Benito's point. Don't take him to the hospital. His tummy's rumbling. Thank you so much to Easter for coming on the show, and thank you for not saying Easter egg, and so sorry about that again.

Yes, yes, thank you, Easter. Everyone should go and buy Easter's book. And also Flavor, which she co-wrote with Yotam Otolengi. Yeah. Shout out Otolengi. Oh, we don't give enough shout-outs on this podcast. Peter Piper. Shout out Peter Piper.

Always. Always shout out Peter Piper. Always shout out Peter Piper. Otter-Lengie. And I guess Easter, so Jesus Christ. Since we were talking so much about Easter eggs earlier. Shout to Jesus Christ, yeah. Yeah, not because of Easter's name.

Yeah. But because of Easter. We were saying Easter eggs, yeah. So shout out of Easter eggs. JC. Yeah. Thanks very much for listening. Was that we're ending the podcast? I think so. It's you who's just shouted out Jesus Christ. Yeah. So what am I supposed to do now? So I'm supposed to clear up your mess and end the podcast.

Well, I was hoping so. Yeah. I thought you could clear up my mess. Shout out all deities. Yes. Especially Jesus Christ. No, no, no, no, no. Thanks for listening. Goodbye. See you in heaven. When you get there. If you ever get there. Alison Spittle. And I'm Fern Brady,

and you might remember us both from our episodes of off-menu. I think in my episode, I got very angry when I ordered toast in a restaurant and was presented with hot bread and then told that that was the nature of sourdough that it simply doesn't toast as a bread.

And I said that I take it in the hand and a mouth, like communion. Did you? I did. That kind of brings us on to the topic of our new podcast. Ignore that feeling. A show by two ex-Catholic girls

who have never learned to acknowledge a single emotion ever. And the podcast is out every Tuesday, starting Tuesday the 10th of February. So please listen and subscribe.