Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster - Melvin Odoom

Episode Date: September 30, 2026

Radio DJ, presenter, and supportive-man-to-new-stand-up-comedians, Melvin Odoom is this week’s dream diner. And he’s choosing menu choices no one has ever picked before. Melvin Odoom is on ‘Celebrity Masterchef’. Watch the full series on BBC iPlayer here.Follow Melvin on Instagram and TikTok @melvinodoom Watch the video version of this episode on the Off Menu YouTube.Off Menu is now on YouTube: @offmenupodcastFollow Off Menu on Instagram and TikTok: @offmenuofficial.And go to our website www.offmenupodcast.co.uk for a list of restaurants recommended on the show.Ed Gamble is on tour in 2027 with ‘Fresh Hell’. For dates and tickets go to edgamble.co.ukOff Menu is a comedy podcast hosted by Ed Gamble and James Acaster.Produced, recorded and edited by Ben Williams for Plosive.Video production by Ben Williams and Megan McCarthy for Plosive.Artwork by Paul Gilbey (photography and design). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi guys, it's Ed Gamble here from the Off-Menu podcast, the podcast you're listening to right now. And I am going on tour next year with my brand new stand-up show, Fresh Hell, and I'm delighted to announce that we are adding two more shows at the Incredible London Palladium. They are on Friday the 19th of March and Saturday the 20th of March. These are prime palladium spots Friday and a Saturday. You've got to get in there. Presale for these shows is on Thursday, the 1st of October, general sale, Friday. the 2nd of October.

Go to my website, edgamble.com.com, UK, for ticket details. Welcome to the off-menu podcast, taking the peaches of conversation, grilling them on the coals of humour, drizzling them in the honey of friendship, and a little dollop of the crem fresh of the internet.

What's that dish called? I don't know, grilled peaches with honey, I guess. I want it. Yeah. That is Ed Gamble. You put Basil on it as well. That would be quite nice. James Acaster.

Together we own a dream restaurant. Every single week, in a guest and we asked him the favour ever start a main course dessert, side dish and drink, not in that order. And this week, our guest is Melvin O Doom! We love Melvin. Melvin is superstar DJ.

We have been on panel shows with Melvin when we started out, started doing TV shows. He was so nice and welcoming, so funny and so good to hang out with on those shows. So he's got a very special place in our heart. I'm so glad we'd finally got Melvin on the podcast. One thing I probably won't say to Melvin, because I don't want to bring up this gig.

But I once did a corporate gig. Yeah. And you had to go on and do 20 minutes, but it was just people walking around like it was a party. So no one listened. It was all really awful people. Melvin was on DJing later. Yeah.

And him and Ricky, who you DJs with it, I went on and they literally stood right at the front and watched the whole thing and laughed really loudly while everyone else was talking. Yeah, yeah. And I was just like, these two guys are total legends. They're absolutely. They're really supportive of everyone around. If you're working with Ricky and Melvin, they've got your back.

Yes. Yeah, yeah. So we're very happy to have Melvin on. He's so funny, he's such a sweet man. Check him out on Celebrity Master Chef as well. Yeah. But listen, Melvin, we love you. But if you say the secret ingredient, we aren't to kick you out at the dream restaurant.

And this week, the secret ingredient is... Doom Bar. Doom Bar. O Doom. O Doom. The beer. Doom bar. The beer, Doom bar.

Yeah. O Doom's such a cool name, man. It's a real show. shame he's not like entrenched in the heavy metal community because O Doom would be perfect. It'd be really cool. Yeah.

Like, yeah, I mean, you can maybe introduce him to the heavy metal community. I think Melvin is such a like, he does support everyone. Yeah. If you did take him to a metal event, I think he'd really jump in. I'll take him to Doom gig,

a Doom metal gig. Doom metal, yeah, yeah. O'Don Metal. Take him to see Yob. But yeah, if he picks that, he's out. Yeah, yeah. See you later, Melvin. Sorry, and thanks for the support.

This is the off-menu menu. Melvin O'Doombe Welcome Melvin to the Dream Restaurant Easy Welcome Melvin O'Dum to the Dream Restaurant but it's back to you for some time

You know what It's mad because I was thinking about this On the way here that I kind of have watched you guys blow up into these big superstars Do you remember that show that we did years ago

called Sweat of Small Stuff Yes When I was like a team captain And you both came on as guests And I just both thought I thought both you were so hilarious. And to now watch you go into these massive superstars is such a big deal.

I'm just almost, I don't know if proud is the right word. You can say proud of you. I can say proud of you. You were very, very supportive. Yes. I didn't do anything. I remember doing sweat the small stuff. We hadn't done much TV.

That was my first panel show ever. Yeah, my first panel show ever. And you were very, yeah, you could have just been like, okay. Right. I have a couple of whippersnappers coming on this. I'm annoyed at these like super green comics week after week. Some people would have that jaded attitude, Melvin. But you were really laughing.

You'd say afterwards, oh, man, you're so funny. You were both genuinely funny. And when I think back to that show, there were so many comedians on there who are doing great things now. Romesh did it as well. Rob Beckett did it. Tom Allen, there's so many names that came through. And that would have been the first time I saw them on TV as well.

So you're part of that fraternity, I feel. It was a good proving ground. It was a good sort of first TV thing for a lot of comics. Without wanting to sound like an old man comic, there's not that really for young comedians anymore on TV. Now it has started with the SNL UK. Yeah. But you're right, prior to that,

there hasn't been anything for young comedians. They have the same cast every week. Yeah, true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Every comic go on this, learn how to do a panel show. You know, I mean, now, sadly, Grimmie, who hosted that show is our enemy.

Yes. Why is Grimmy yours? It's a rival food podcast. We can't. We can't be complimenting grimy on this. You never mention him. Do you never? So the first time he's ever been mentioned. Yeah.

Would you have him on the podcast? No. No. Never. Who started first? We did. Okay. Yeah, absolutely.

Oh, cool. We've had Angela on. We've had Angela on. Angela's fine. No, we regret that now. We regret that. It was before they had their podcast. We didn't know we had a spy here.

And if you're spying on us right now, and you're going to start some food-related stuff. Definitely not. So help me, even though you encouraged us when we were new comedians before we were mega superstars. We won't be happy with you, Melvin, if you're spying on us right. This is a spy mission. If you're going to call Grimmie as soon as this finishes. I do love Grimmy.

He does his show next door to us, actually. Does he know? Yeah, because he's six music and Radio One, so he's like about two Shoo Joe's away. He still seeing him a lot. Do you talk about small stuff with Grimmy? He doesn't really talk about that just because he's got this superstar lifestyle, well, he knows all the big celebrities. But yeah, yeah, he knows some big celebs.

And I mean, you guys know some names Yeah, we have some good celebrity as well. Yeah. Have you done Dish? I haven't done Dish. Right, but you're on this one. I won't do it now. Yeah.

Yeah. It's actually in your contract. Really? You're not allowed to do Dish. Is that for real? Forever, yeah, yeah. You can't do it. Okay, fair. That's why Dish has never had

Huge Davis on it. Yeah. We had him and he can't do Dish now. I wonder if you guys fight for guests. Yeah, I mean, sometimes we'll get an availability check for a guest and then not hear anything back and then they pop up on Dish. and I've got to say it puts me in a bad move

for the rest of the day. Okay, good to know. Pretty annoying. Yeah. Okay. So note to self, don't do dish. Don't do it. Yeah.

And note to everyone, not just to self. Don't do dish. Can I mention to Grimmie that I've done this? Yeah, yeah, definitely. Make sure he knows. Rub it in his face. Okay, cool. Say it was great.

Let's take some pictures and I'll show him off. Yeah. I'll do it tomorrow. Get him. Do you like cooking? I think I'm an okay cook. I'm doing a cooking show at the moment. I'm doing celebrity master chef.

That's a big show, man. I can't give anything away. That's, I mean, to be cooking on a national stage like that, it's quite intimidating. Yeah, I wasn't nervous until you said that, but yes, you're right. Have you filmed it already? You have, yeah. Yeah, yeah, so you quite don't need to be.

Yeah. But when it goes out. They're going to watch you. Everyone's going to see it, Melvin. Everyone's going to see your cooking. Okay. And it's everyone in the nation. Okay, yeah.

Everyone in the nation. It doesn't help again. No. No. And I can't say anything without, because, without giving it away. Yeah, you don't want to give anything away. But you look pretty confidence at here, I'll be honest.

I can see it in your eyes. Well, I love food, which is why I'm here. Yeah. So I've kind of learned enough to get away with cooking for myself and making sure things taste delicious. But the best cook in the world for me is my mum. I think no one can beat my mom. Yeah.

Is your mom being on dish? She's never been on dish. No, so you'd like her as well. Maybe we'll get your mom on here. Yeah, after you should get rid of me right now. I'm like, everyone on the podcast. Happily, we can do that if you want, need to.

Can we do that? Yeah. She lives in like North London, so take about an hour and a half a resident. And she'll need to get ready to figure out where we are. So she's cooking Ghanaian food. Yeah.

And like in Ghanaian, do you have many Garnetian friends? We've had a couple of Garnetan heritage guests on. We have, yes. I mean, a nice pivot there from whether we've got Garnetian friends. We've met some Garnetian. They've been on the,

everyone who's been on the show is our friend. Okay, good. Well, in that case, you would know that. In Ghanaian culture, like food is like a big, big deal. It's how we make everyone feel welcome. I feel like gardenians are like the most welcoming people. If we were to go to my dad's house right now, who'd like start making you a sandwich and sit you in doubt,

sit you down in front of the table and just get you to feel comfortable. I love that. And we do that with food. And I'd say like there's a different food for each mood and for each feeling. So if I'm sick, my mom would make you her hot pepper soup or something like that. Or there's a thing called bunku, which is quite a starchy, it was like a bowl and you kind of like pound it together

and you have it with like hot pepper stew or fish or meat and stuff like that so yeah my mum's food is like my number one thing Wow so will it feature on the menu or do you not want to do you have any spoilers it's good a feature later on yeah good I love different food for every mood yeah yeah because I don't you think

also the first mood you mentioned was sick yeah because I didn't want to because I didn't want to ruin my happy mood yeah okay Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's your mood today? Sick.

I'm in a sick mood. Yeah, sick's not really a mood, is it? Yeah. You're right, okay, for it. It could be. It could be. I'm in a sick mood. It depends because there's sick as in a... Yeah.

That's a sick outfit you're wearing, yeah. Yeah, you said you've been hanging out with Craig David recently. If you told Craig David you're in a sick mood, he'd be pretty happy to hear. He'd love that. Yeah, yeah. And he's a lovely man. Have you ever been for an ice cream with Craig David? and if you have, would you say, what's your flavour?

You knew this was coming, didn't you? Because I thought he was going to do something to do with like the days. What day? What day? Yeah, well, we could do that now. Yeah, both those things. What day was it on and what's your flavour? It would.

Sunday, I'm trying to do. Sunday, ice cream, Sunday. Oh, yeah. Sunday is having sex? Sunday, yeah. Is he living sex on Sunday? Yeah, yeah. No, he shows on Sunday.

He chills on Sunday. It's perfect. Yeah. See, I'm really bad with, like, jockey puns. Yeah. Can I try now? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got one, but I need to fill you in.

Okay. Oh. That was it? That's good. Yeah. Did you miss it? Yeah. No, I really liked it.

I feel it's better. For a while I had to, like, quickly in my head, Google, Craig David. Yeah. Like stuff. And I was like, oh, yeah. First ever tune for me. Yeah, yeah. I think we've done the main three.

Yeah, those are the top ones. We haven't really done the one that he did the... Well, I don't know which. Sometimes you get mixed up with Craig David. I'm like, what was him and what was Bo Selector? Yeah. Never say that to him. No, never bring a Bo Selector.

But obviously, the first song I heard him do was the one that he says. Film me in. Now, I can't actually remember the lyrics to it because people used to sing it to a kid in my class at school and change the lyrics to make fun of the fact he had B-O. So in my head. Rite E-Wind. Re-E-Wind. Oh.

The crowd say Boe-Selector. And the crowd say B-O-Selector. Yeah, that was, yeah. And they didn't say selector, they said sweater because this kid sweated a lot. So I was the B-O kid. Not because I smelled, but because I was small. I would always get, people would make fun of me. Oh, I'm sorry, Melvin.

Stiller sparkling more to Melvin. Initially, I wanted to go still, but this is my dream menu, right? So I'm going to go for sparkling because I feel like it's more of a treat. Yes. And it reminds me of like my family home. my mum would have a little bottle of Perrier water by the side with a twist of lime you don't see that anymore and we weren't allowed to have it

so anytime she left the room I would sneak in and have a few sips of it because that was her water that was her water it was almost like an elixir. It was like a special divine type of water and so yeah mum's Perrier water with a twist of lime would be my go-to did it almost taste better because it was stolen? I have a not stolen because

Well, she told you to not have it, and it was her water, and she went out the room and you had a sip of it. He's such a square. I like to use the word borrow. You were gobbin it back into the bottle? Well, not, if we've got the same saliva, the same DNA. Yeah. So it doesn't really count.

That works. It's like if your brother or your siblings were to use your toothbrush, that would be fine, no? No, not fine. I happened to me once. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was bad. Me and my brother discovered that we had unknown

when they'd been using whichever as toothbrush for the same toothbrush for months. So you didn't even notice though because it's the same mouth.

Same mouth. Same DNA. Yeah, sure, same mouth, same mouth, but it was bad when I was like, I was brushing my teeth

with the door open. And I'd turn around and my brother stopped in the corridor looks at me and you guys, that's my toothbrush. And I looked at me and this is my toothbrush.

And both of the same time went, oh no. I will challenge Melvin's idea that you have the same mouth. Yeah, we don't have the same mouth. Same DNA, same salive.

I don't think exactly the same. Because if I go, got, if I did a crime. Yeah. Right. Wouldn't it work if you took it? And the cops got my DNA. They wouldn't go,

oh, it's a member of the ACaster family, but we don't know which one, because they've all got exactly the same DNA. So does that only use work for urine if you're trying to give, like, a sample, like, let's say if they do, like, drug tests at your workplace. Yeah.

You know, for example. For example. I'm not saying I'd do that. Well, with that, they're not testing, like, I think they're just testing, like, what's in the urine. Yeah. They're not going like, yeah, that is yours. Is this your urine or not?

So you can use any urine, is what you're saying. Yeah, clean urine. If someone's used clean urine. Is it how many people in the films always use, like, someone that's related to them? I think it's someone who would do it for them. Oh. Who would go, yeah, okay, I'll do that to help you. Okay.

But they don't go like for when the cops test it to see if it's a bad. They're just testing for drugs. They're not testing for whose urine it is. It's good to know. We've learned a lot. Yeah. We already know this. But that's why they always make them go in the toilet.

I feel like we've collectively learned that. Yeah. Yeah. Because they always go in there and do the sample. Right. And then the personal. have like a bottle strapped to their leg or something. Yes. Because they have to do it.

The way they're trying to make sure it's theirs is by them doing it sort of in front of them. Okay. Right. Okay. All right. But also, I just don't, yeah, brothers don't have the same mouths. This is but the same deal. Oh, there's, I don't, I think you can differentiate.

Different DNA. Yeah. Well, have you tested it? You're saying this, but have you lined up, like, let's say, like, do you have a brother? Yeah, but he's half brother. So there's, that doesn't count. I need a full brother. And then would you, you get your partner?

Yeah. you blindfold them and then you'd both kiss the partner and see if they could tell the difference these are tests why is that the first test you come up there?

Scientific. It's the first test. It's not how you're if it was my science. That is science. Yeah. It's biology. I get my brother to kiss

my girlfriend. And then see if they could tell the difference. Because it's the same mouth. Same mouth. We haven't tested it so we don't know the results yet. That's all I'm saying. And that's a good idea

for a TV show. Exactly. It feels... Have you got a brother? I have a half brother called Isaac in America. Well, maybe you could half kiss your wife. We can test that out, yeah.

This is a great TV show, guys. Yeah. Yeah. We share the winners. It's called That's My Brother. That's my brother. I think we need to, like, contact the people who made naked attraction. They'd make it.

They'd make this. How did they have so many seasons of that show, by the way? Because it's people naked getting revealed slowly. Because all genitals look different. No, that's not the thing that I'm confused about. I've got a friend who was a researcher on that show. was like it's the hardest show to book because people pull out all the time

not in that way. But because of the, you know, the embarrassment of doing the show. It sounds like how have you got so many people? And you know they don't get paid for it. Right, I didn't know that. They get expenses. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, well. I should be giving away all these secrets. But apparently this is what I heard about the show

is that sometimes people would just not show up who were supposed to be on it. So they'd have to just go out onto the street and be like, can you come in a minute, do? Yeah, yeah. Do you know another little secret? Please. The studio stinks. Serious, serious, I thought of You've picked the right people to share that secret with. That's funny.

Yeah. And apparently freezing cold as well. Oh, really? Yeah. It was just like when... A lot of people would try and get themselves beforehand. Yeah, I would want to.

Would try and get themselves a bit. But they weren't allowed on camera if they were fully hard. Yeah. So they would have to try and like get themselves to that sweet spot. Yeah. And sometimes they would go over the sweet spot. Yeah. And they would get told they can't go on and they'd be really angry and gutted,

but while fully erect. Yeah. Wow. I mean, that's an art form in itself to get to the sweet spot. The sweet spot is, yeah. You're either, you know, one or the other. Yeah. Yeah, just to try and get it in that window.

Mid-point. Yeah. And you have to get it in that window. And yeah, yeah. Yeah. In that space of time. Yeah. So impressive.

So I think for that's my brother, it's not the same set, is it? Because if anything, you need everything, covered apart from the lips. Yes. Yeah. So maybe like two things that come up.

Yeah. Well, we can still use part of the set. So you know what it goes, No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah. So maybe we do it an upside down version. Yeah. Yeah.

So it's just the face. Yeah. And then the body's covered. But you can't see the face because then you'll know if it's your brother or not. Oh, yeah. Your partner's blindfolded for the whole thing. I was thinking about blindfolding them

and then you can just use it. Well, then we don't need the screen. We don't even need that. You saved money already. Yeah. Poplubs or bread. Pop lobs or bread, Melvado, doom. Poplubs or bread.

Bread. Sourdough. Have you been to honey and smoke yet? No. No. I mean, I need to go. Everyone tells me to go to all of their places, the honey and co places. I've got to go to honey and smoke.

Yeah. It's easy. It's like, because you guys are always in Central anyway. It's easy to go to. It's very, very, it's very chill. Because I've been listening to you guys. And a lot of the time, you lot of the restaurants. And so with my menu, I've tried a lot of the restaurants.

try to select places I don't think you've gone to yet. Okay. This is good. This is smart. So I want to try and educate at the same time. Thank you. You've taught us so much already. Thank you.

You're welcome. So when I did the show with James, when we did, would I lie to you, I spoke about my friend Edis. He did. And he's Turkish Cypriot. And so obviously, you know, they're big on kebabs and stuff like that. And so, like, their menu is quite Mediterranean, but they do the best sour dough bread there. It's like this massive ball. comes with like the most amazing butter.

They bake it there. Sometimes like, oh, just that would be like my go-to start and I won't have anything else there. It's just so delicious. So yeah, sour-dough bread. Can we talk about your friend again? So was it Edith's. Edithes, Kaim.

So from what I remember, when we did Woodaulai to you together, he used to sell people rubbers at school. Yeah. Well, not sell the rubbers. He would clean the rubbers. He would clean the rubbers of people. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. So he would come to the, The way you said it, you were cracking me up when we talked sports about. So I explained that he would, he'd basically come to school and he had this service for like 50 to 30 pence. He'd come and clean your rubber. He would add this amazing scent.

And no one knew how he did it. Yeah. But he used to just get like the spray, the car spray, like the air freshener and use that to freshen up the rubber. And then you'll put it in your pencil case and organise it for you. He was just very, he was a businessman before, you know, before his age. Entrepreneurs are the world. I was looking for.

And so, like, he did that, and now he, like, does property and stuff like that. Of course he's had that mind from years ago. But he's still my best, one of my best friends now. Why do you need a rubber clean? It was just a nice service. So, so sincere. The way Melvin looked at me is the sincerest that anyone's ever looked at me. Melvin's eyes is completely lit up.

Just a nice servant. Kind of communicate that to Ed, how nice it would be. Well, just imagine you're in class. Yeah. Yeah. And the person next to you, the student next to you, opens up their pencil case, and they've got a clean rubber. Yeah. And then you open up yours, yours is dirty. Dirty rubber.

Eddies comes in and goes, I'll clean that for you. Yeah. What are you going to do? Yeah. Well, I understand what he did. 30 pence. 30 pence. But why do you need to have a clean rubber?

It was just, it's almost like saying to you, Ed, why do you need a clean car? You don't actually need a clean car, but it's nice to have it. Well, James's going to drop me in here. Yeah, his car's disgusting. It's moulded it inside. Oh, he left it. He left it for so long. Yeah.

All right, why do you need a clean pair of trainers? They don't need to be clean. It's just nice to have clean trainers. Yeah. It's got you there. But then sometimes the fashion is to not have clean trainers, isn't it? Sometimes. Yeah.

But for me, I like to have clean trainers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In fact, I've got these ones and I love those. Yeah, these aren't very clean. They're a bit battered now. Well, on purpose, though. Well, no, I mean, I just like to wear my trainers. The Travis is okay to be.

Yeah, okay, good. All right. This could be a different language now. Yeah, I have no idea. What is being said, what people are talking about with the trainers. The clean rubber's made more sense for you. I guess if you're using a dirty rubber, you'll get, like, pencil, like, marks on it anyway. You'll get smudges as well if it's a dirty, so it actually didn't make sense.

Do you want to run Ed through the way that he would clean the rubbers? So he'd take it home over the weekend. He'd take home over the weekend. Well, everyone. He couldn't do it on the site? Well, no, because he takes multiple rubbers. So, take, like, maybe mine, and then maybe, like, my other friend Josiah's.

Yeah. Then he'll go home with, let's say, seven or eight rubbers, goes to his little workshop shed, give him a little clean. Now, he didn't really, he didn't reveal the way he cleaned them. I just knew about the, he told me later on in life.

Well, you told us that he cleaned them by rubbing them on paper. Yeah, I did, dude. That was another method, yeah, you're right. Which we didn't know. No. It was all a secret.

It was just rubbers. Yeah. If you just rub them on, clean paper, then the whole point of rubbers is they do go down and you all have a clean. I don't think we realised that as children. We were young. We made mistakes. Do you remember the rubbers that were like, were they pink on one end and blue

on the other end? Yeah, I do remember them. And the blue one was supposed to be for ink? Yeah. But all it did was just like, eradicated how fuck your page up your page? Yeah, it never worked. You absolutely ripped your page to shit. And wasn't there like a, do you remember, tipex? Yes. That was rubbish, wasn't it? Tipx mouse. Did you have a tipx mouse? No.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I do like that. And there were straighter lines. Yeah. Yeah, really. That was a good way. But then writing over, all bumpy. Oh, yeah. They were, I mean, all I did was use it to write my name on stuff and, like, use the tipx to, like, do a pentagram on my ring binders. That's cool.

Yeah. That's really cool. Yeah, yeah. Sick. Your dream starter, Melvin. My dream starter is, I'm quite simple with my starters, to be honest with you. I'm a chicken shop and olives guy, or Hulumi. Chicken shop and olives?

Yeah. So, I mean, I didn't want to say that. the name of chicken shop in case I wasn't allowed to. You can say all the names. People love it when... Do they? Nando's. Like, Nando's olives, I think, are the best olives. They are.

To be honest, I don't think I ate olives until Nando's. Yeah. I don't know. Were you the same? I had olives before. But I think it's a lot of people's introduction to olives. And sometimes it's the only olives people want. They are very good. And it's not just olives.

They put garlic in there. Yeah. Mushrooms. Yeah. There's a pepper maybe. Yeah. I just think it is the pinnacle of olives. I think people look down on it because it's a chicken shop

but actually they're better than most places. I agree. I love those olives so much. I look forward to the olives. Oh, good. I'm not alone on this. No, delicious.

And they've really nailed their ratios now. Over the years, they've changed like, there's the purple olives and the green olives. They've realised that most people like the greens. So they've like let the greens be like most of it is green olives. And those other things that we mentioned, there's like bits of those in there,

but they're not coming nuts on the mushrooms and the peppers and the garlic. I'm glad you noticed that. James, because I don't think people did really recognise the ratio. That's actually great word, the ratio of the peppers, because you're right, the black ones were disgusting. Yeah, I wasn't into the... You eat them, because if you've paid for it, but they were... I think now and again, I mean, but the greens need to be the stars. Yeah.

Right? And then the really salty hit of the black purple olives are like, woo, that's a nice little, yeah. Yeah, but then the big fat green guys, that's where it's at. And meaty as well. And for me, the garlic. The garlic's great. Oh, yeah, I love the garlic. Actually, eat the garlic.

Yeah. Do you? Yeah. Do you? That's how you tell the difference between Eddard's brother. Because they're pickled. So there's all of the like garlicky, horrible garlicky thing is sort of taken out of them. So they're just sort of like a crunchy little slight garlicky hint.

I think I'd always be worried because of like when I looked at this like the kind of like the menu, I thought about a lot of date scenarios. Because a lot of the time when I'm out, well, back in the day before I was when I was single, I would, if I was going to dinner, it would be because I'm on a date of some kind. And I would never eat a clove of garlic on a date just in case, you know, it goes very well. You've got to be careful about that sort of thing. Well, I've got to say, Melvin, you're already introducing us to some places we've never heard of before on the podcast. So the mission accomplished already with the start.

I want to pick places you've definitely not been. Yeah, places that have never been mentioned on the pod. Just some really, just some really niche. No, no. People who know, no. But, you know, not everyone knows about this super... We're never been there. Exclusive spot. Nandoes.

No, no, no. Actually, talking to apologies on the Nandoes, because obviously you've been there before. But I wanted to mention another restaurant that you may not have heard. Dan's Le Noir. Have heard of it. Not being. I've not heard of it, not been.

I don't know if it's still running, but for years it used to be my go-to. Do you know what it's about? Go on. It's where you dine in the dark. I have heard of this. And all the waiters are blind. And so it basically kind of heightens your senses

because of you can't see anything and then your taste and your smell is intensified. Now, I hate to not move on from it, but perfect location to play. That's my brother. Oh, yeah. We could, so you could do that and then have something to eat after. Difficult to put it on telly, though.

Yes. Infrared? Completely in the dark. Yeah, because there used to be a show where it was in red. What was that? I think it was called dating in the dark. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah, I vaguely remember that. I do remember that. I remember that. I remember that in the trailer for it. Yeah, definitely Channel 4. And it was like the late night big brother footage as well if you tuned in on E4.

So we could do it. You could watch it. It's a possible to. It's a lot of it. You're a bit more money on cameras though now. Yeah. Well, we're going to really splash out for it. It's my brother, I think.

Yeah. Yeah. You don't all in. But you got a good idea. Yeah. You don't. You don't. It depends what channel takes it, though.

Well, it's going to be channel four. Okay. Channel 5 at a push. Yeah. But like it'll be channelful. Okay, good. They'll bite our hands off. Yeah.

For something like that. Brother's hands off. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They wouldn't. You got a guess. Yeah. So your dream starter is, and I want to say I'm saying this way,

olives from Nando's? Yeah. Olives from Nandoes. Yeah. And then a Hulumi. Yeah. From a place called skewed. Okay.

Okay. I've not heard of this. Not heard of skewed. Oh, I thought you would have heard of skewed. We haven't. Oh, there you go. A skewed is a little place in round Cotfosters area. Like Benceradian cuisine.

Yeah. But I just think they do like the best Hulumi. Talk us through the Hulumi. Why is the Hulumi so good for you? For me, I like, when you talk about Racial, I like, I don't like Hulumi that looks too pale. I want it to be like nicely tanned. Yeah. Yeah.

Like a mixed racial dark skin. Brother. So I think that's the way my Hulumi should look. Sure. That's not what that's my brother's about, by the way. No, no. No. Can't make that clear enough to any Channel 4 commissioners who are

listening. That's not what that's my brother is about. It could be there. It could be. Yeah. But you're hosting this. Yeah. Okay, cool. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, a nice brown Halumi. Yeah. Almost crispy. Yeah. Great. I would say, not too moist. And I don't

I don't like a squishy hulumi. You don't like a squeaky. It can be squeaky. No. Don't do that. I'm with you. Yeah. And quite thin because some people have it quite chunky. I don't like it too chunky. Have you been to Bubula? No, what's that? Just about to shut that. Yeah.

Buba has really good Hulumi. They do this like camamarline honey, Hulumi. No squeak. Exactly how you describe color-wise. Really? Yeah. Just sit there with a knife and forth.

It's like the whole block, isn't it? It's the whole block. You just got it right there. Where's this place? There's a few. Yeah. There's one in Soho. It's one in Spittal Fields.

Yeah. Okay, all right. Yeah. It's well worth it. It's a, yeah, it's all veggie. Okay. And they do like a, it's like a tasting menu. But you can order things individually.

as well, but the tasting menu is a thing to go for and they do like, they just keep bringing stuff and it's all so good. And how do you pronounce it, Bubba? Buba. Buba. Buba. Buba. B-U-B-U-B-U-B-U-A-L-A. B-U-L-A. That's how you say. Sorry, I was thinking of something else. No, go on. Do their hands. Go on, say it.

Bubula. It's like how you say baby in a certain language. We all thought you were going to say boobs. You're doing this gesture with your hands. We're like, that's how you say. No, never mind. Don't like, like, certain characters in films.

go, like, Bobbulah, Bubba. Bobba. Bobola. Yeah. Babushka. Yeah. Yeah. It's a nice word to say, isn't it? It's lovely. It rolls off the tongue. Yeah. Well, you should try that Hulumi. I think you'd like. Don't check it out, no. Add it to my ears. But you want the skewed Hulumi for this. Skewed Hulumi for this. Does it come with like a sauce or is it just the grilled, the grilled or fried Hulumi? It doesn't need the sauce. It really doesn't. It's so delicious, so tasty. They do like a, they do an amazing kind of like a chili sauce there, which you can have with it.

But if I'm making Hulumi at home, then I usually have it with like hot honey. Nice. Which I've only been introduced to in the last few years. It's a very now thing, I think. Who invented that? The hot honey. They've not got credit for it.

Someone decides to put chili and honey and go, and they've come up with it, and they're not getting any credit. That's true. The first time I heard about hot honey was like a New York pizza place, do a pizza. I can't even remember the name of the place, but I know it just became a thing

at this maybe Brooklyn Pizza Place. where it would be, they'd put hot honey on the pizza and now you see it loads here. I think that's, honey is a game changer for me. Yeah. I put in everything. Just honey in general. Honey, I put honey in absolutely everything.

If I make a protein shake, there's honey in it. Yeah. Like cereals, honey in it. Tea, mint tea. I love a mint tea. How much honey are you getting through? Keep this point in. Three bottles a month. What?

No, yeah. So much honey. How big of these bottles? Yeah, pop a size bottles. Squeasy honey. I do squeeze. I do jars if I'm doing manuka manuka for teas

okay yeah manuka honey that's that's expensive as well I'm done all right spending a lot of money on the honey would you like you like Winnie the Pooh would you say? I don't mind that as a name walk around the house sometimes in just a t-shirt yeah

well I don't I don't feel comfortable being naked from the bottom down in the house because there was a a time when I was staying with a partner in a hotel and she was sharing the room with her friend and the boyfriend. And the boyfriend came into the room and he was quite upset that we were in his, in his partner's room and my partner's room. So he threw an ice bucket over my head. And I felt like I wanted to be angry, but I felt vulnerable because I was so naked. Hang on. So hold on. I'm not following this story. We're going

to have to dig into this. What did I miss out? What wasn't clear? The whole story too much. Here's what I think you just said. Go on. Yeah, go on. You and your partner were sharing a hotel room with her friend. No, no. So, okay, I missed out a bit. So I was at a club.

Okay. And the girl that I was dating was like, I'm going to come to the same club. Yeah. And I'm going to get a hotel down the road. Yeah. Right. And she was like, but I'm going to share the hotel with my mate. Yeah.

But don't worry, she's going to stay with her boyfriend somewhere else. Yeah. Right. And so we all got to the club and we went back to the hotel. And then when we were asleep in bed, her friend, who was sharing the room with her, came back to collect some things. But she also came back with the dude that she was dating. And he didn't like the fact that I was in this room because he was like, what are you doing in here?

My girl's shared bedroom. So he was just fuming with me for no reason. He didn't know the situation. He didn't know the situation. So he was just angry. And I was trying to like be friendly. He just got a t-shirt on. And you had no trousers of pants.

I had nothing on. Oh, you're naked. I was just explained I don't like being vulnerable in places. Yeah. Like I just feel like if you're naked, you're not safe. Yeah. Because of that experience now. Yeah.

So there was an ice bucket next to us because we may have had some shampel that day. Yeah. Like I said, I'm doing all right. Yeah, yeah. So we had some shampoo. It was, so there's this little bucket of just ice and he pulled it over me. And I felt like I couldn't do anything because I didn't have any clothes on. I didn't want to jump out of bed and start, you know, arguing with the guy.

Because I wasn't protected. You're in stay covered up. So generally now I'm always. covered. When did this happen? Was it pre-posts ice bucket challenge? Oh, it was pre-ice bucket. So you can even raise money?

Yeah. And also the ice bucket challenge is seen as a positive now. Yeah, it seemed good. But back then it was... Back then it was an attack. Yeah. And also, the last thing you want, if you're naked, is for someone to dump ice on you.

You don't want it. Because it's shrinkage. Shrinkage. Which, you know, no one wants. Yeah, especially if you're about to go on negative attraction. Which you were. Yeah. Which is another bit of the story you missed out.

Yeah, yeah. That's my brother. Is that clear now? Yeah, yeah. So you like honey, but you don't want to wear no trousers or pants in your house. Never. Because a man was dumped an ice bucket on your head when you were naked. Correct.

Correct. Your dream main course, Melvin. Mum's Jullough rice. With chicken, spicy chicken. Here we go. Rack up, another Garnayan rice, Jolof. How many Jolofs have you had on this? We've had a fair few Jolofs, but obviously...

Do you know the Jolof thing? Do you know the Jolof story? In the Jolof story, we hear a lot, depending on who we've got, is Nigerian versus Ghani. I just think it's important for you to know. Yeah. It's an important thing for you to know, and for you to know that the Garnanean Joloff is the better Joloff.

Yes. Yeah. And what Nigerian did you have on it? Quite a few people. I mean, basically... It's a friendly rivalry, by the way. It's been a while since. anyone's actually pushed a particular type of...

Because, like, we've had a few guests on. In the early days, everyone would come on and they'd say, like, Ghanaian's the best, or Nigerian's the best. But then we had a period of time now where people have come on and gone, no, you know what, I don't get involved in all that. Oh, really? Or people have gone, like, actually shout out these other gun names.

Because actually, we're both just, like, copying this other job of the OG. I think the, I can't remember. The original maybe Sierra Leone or Gambio. I doubted myself, but, like, yeah. I can't remember. but we're both of us aren't the originals so funny that we've kind of taken control of this argument

when we're both not the OGs So it's good to have someone you know bring it up again and leave nice and an important topic that people don't talk about enough yeah there was a period when I wanted to have what's called a Joloff off where we get

a variety of Nigerian celebrities and Ghanaian celebrities and we get their parents to make a joloft rice and then we blindfold someone because you know I love a blindfold these are all your idea of blindfold based every single idea has to have a blindfold yeah you feel less vulnerable that way

if they're blindfolded 100% and then you'll your taste for the better jolof yeah because again it's a thing that no one's that could cause real problems like a civil war yeah it's come up a lot on this podcast so I'm sure if you speak to ben afterwards he could make that show with you

the jolof off as like a special like just online only but straight to YouTube like of menu spin off you as the host although you can't really be the host because I think the host has to be yeah I have to be

because you're clearly not my husband yeah I'll always be gone yeah you need a host who's not gonna pick aside yeah somewhat like a Jamaican would be fine okay great any particular

Ricky yeah Ricky yeah I mean he's a mate so someone a Jamaican I don't like no Chabarangs Yeah, Shabha Ranks. Well, obviously, if we can get Shabba Ranks.

I'd watch that alone just for Shabar Ranks. Yeah, yeah. So it would be good to get Shabba. A lot. Saying Shabba, hopefully. Yeah. Hopefully. Yeah.

It's also in his contract to say Shabba. Yeah. Then great. Yeah. Well, he has to say Shabba. Yeah. You'd think so. It's like Sean Paul.

You're not going to get Sean Poo. You're not saying his name. Has he? He doesn't do it anymore. He has stopped. That's disappointing. There are people who stopped saying it. I remember when,

is his name Richard Wilson? Stop saying I don't believe it. What, he just doesn't say I don't believe it anymore. Yeah, there was a point where he made it very clear that he wasn't going to say it anymore. It's nice to know how James's brain works that he went from Shabarangster Richard Wilson so quickly. You know, people who are like associated with a...

With a second catchphrase. Yeah, that's a really cool catchphrase. So, like, yeah, he was like, I'm not going to say it. I remember it was a proper thing. I'm not saying it anymore. I would have gone DJ Khalid. Yeah. Like, and another one.

Yeah. Because he doesn't particularly say that much now. Pretty similar? Yeah. DJ Khalid and Richard Wilson. Yeah. I've got one foot in the grave, am I right? Yeah.

Yeah. I can't say that because I have to play all of their music. I have to be polite to all musicians. I think that's polite to DJ Khalid. Yeah. Oh, okay. What about to... Richard Wilson?

Yeah. Well, it was his sitcom. Oh, okay. But I might have to interview him one day. You think one day you'll have to interview Richard Wilson from One Foot in the Grail? With me, you never know. I'll take most work available to me. Yeah, I'd love to see that.

I'd love to see you. If it happens, you'll be the first person I call. I'll tell you what. I think it's unlikely. In fact, if it did happen, do you know what I'd say? What? I don't believe it. No, that's good.

I enjoy that kind of humour. So the, with this, I want to... I enjoy that coming. Spicy chicken with the jawloff. Has to be spicy. How spicy we talk? It has, you have to feel it afterwards when you use the loo. Like for me, I told you I did Master Chef and that was the mistake I made.

Because my mum said to me, Melv, like obviously people don't have hot pepper stew like you do at home. So when you do this, like make it a bit tame and that's where I lost points. Oh, wasn't spicy enough. I made it too tame. I made it too tame. So that, for me, always stick to your guns. Yeah. And, you know, always be yourself.

So the master self judges were going The next day they'd come to you and they'd go I use the loo and it was fine So you're out Yeah haven't passed Yeah Yeah Like well I know we sent you food

But since then I've been to the toilet And I had no issues whatsoever So you're going home Yeah That is a good barometer of the peppiness Yeah Yeah

And you want your mum to make this Yeah Mum Because there's two facets of that A you've got delicious food And B you get to see your lovely mum Yeah That's nice

My mum actually refused To teach me that recipe because she was like, then you won't come and visit me anymore. And she only taught it to me because of Mastershire. That's the only reason. And have you seen your mum since? No, she's been busy.

It's way too busy. It's a shame. Yeah. But we, you know, we message each time of once. Yeah, it takes the same thing. Yeah, yeah. She's all right. She's got loads of cousins and stuff to speak to.

It's really good. That's my cousin. That's a spit-off. Your dream side dish? My dream side dish. is mac and cheese. Now, when I say mac and cheese, what do you think of? I think this a trick question?

No, it's not. I think of mac and cheese. From where? I guess, I mean, I'm thinking like, from like American restaurants. Wrong. Well, that is what I think of, Melvin. Wrong. Because I know what you're going to say, but I'm allowed to think of whatever I don't want to think about.

What am I going to say? Barbados. Oh, well done. I'm right, aren't I? Yeah, yeah. And you tried to trick me by calling it mac and cheese. It's macaroni pie. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. So, yeah, well done. So, yeah, there's a little place called Palm Bay, Little West Indian in Essex. Yeah. And they do the best mac and pie. So I'm really impressed.

Because I think a lot of people get mac and cheese and mac pie mixed up. Yeah. And it is a very, very different dish. But I think the best side dish is very much a treat. So where's your go-to then for mac pie? I don't really have a go-to, but my mother-in-law grew up in Barbados. Oh, beautiful. So, and hence my wife is obsessed with macaroni pie and, you know, flying fish and all of that sort of stuff.

Wonderful. And I've had macaroni pie a few times and absolutely delicious. Are you both fans of West Indian food? Yeah. Yeah. Okay, yeah. I haven't had enough of it, if I'm honest. Oh, I love it.

I should have more. I love it. That mac pie and the dumplings, and they do another thing like that. called festivals, which is almost like a rolled up donut, but it's a bit more savory, but we're kind of a sweet kick to it. But those are like my go-to. West Indian side dishes, I think are the best plantain, festivals, dumplings, mac pie, anything like that. West Indian side dishes are the best for me. Oh, yeah, macaroni pie is so good. So much cheese in it. It's very, yes. And it stands up. Like, you cut slices off it. It's just delicious.

Yeah. And I went to a restaurant once, and I thought, it was a Mac Pie and they tricked me. They mentioned the American one that they brought American one that you, and I felt so cheated. Yeah, I agree. So where do you want this one from? So this one's from a place called Palm Bay in Loughton. Uh-huh.

Which is, um, so I love this one so much. I've got a little hack for Deliveroo. So if they don't deliver to your house, what I do is drive halfway to meet the driver. That's a hack, no. Does everyone do this? No, no, no. Everyone doesn't do it.

It's not a hack. It's more effort for you. It's not a hack. No, but it's not a hack going. If they don't deliver you. And if they won't deliver there, I'll go to the restaurant and pick it up. No, no, no.

And if they won't pack it up for me, here's my hack, I'll go to the restaurant, I'll sit down at a table, and I'll eat it, and I'll pay it at the end. If they don't deliver to you, go to somewhere where they will deliver to

and wait there instead. No, you've missed the point. And that's a Melvin hack. That's a hack, guys. you can take that home with you. No, what I'm saying is I'll go as far as they deliver. Yeah, I know.

We know what you're saying. We'll tell you that's not a hack because that's you playing by there. But at least I don't have to drive all the way from North London to Loughton. Yeah. Sure. Yeah, yeah.

So what I do is I drive to somewhere like Chinkford. Yeah. That's that. And that's like halfway through. Yeah. I love the idea of you sat in your car in Chingford, like, I've done it again. Fooled them again.

Filling up your car at a petrol station. They're like, Melvin's parked in Chinkford again to take it over to him. Sometimes it can get stressful when they don't know what car you're in. Yeah. So you then have to chase the guy, because I usually go to car parks, is my secret. Oh, that's part of the hack. You're getting macaroni-pired delivered to a car park. Yeah.

Melvin's secret. While you sit there in your car. The open secret is he parked in a car park. the guy comes and he does that thing where he parks the opposite way where you're facing so it's like two people having a secret meeting in the car park well sometimes

do you flash your lights like a doggar yeah i do that and horn horn and lights is the trick yeah but sometimes the map on deliveroo isn't as accurate as ways yeah so sometimes they say it's right behind me but it's not could be the other side of the street

okay uh some of these guys the hacks back firing by the sound of things you're now sometimes sometimes because I've got to let people know what works and doesn't work in case they go out and do it and there's problems so how long's the drive from from yours to Chingford

20 minutes 20 minutes yeah not far I'm actually quite glad that we film these now Melvin is like absolutely cracking under the pressure of our question in here I feel like I'm in the police station looking at Ed with like just like this fear in his eyes

oh my God I got I'll answer this next question. My hack. I'm so proud of my hack. I'm sorry proud of my hack that I do. I drive to wherever they need me to. But I just don't want to go all the way. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. I understand that. You don't want to go all the way there for your macaroni. You'd go to a car park halfway in Chingford. Sometimes I don't come to this right car park. You need to go and find them. So I hear what you'll say, you'll say, once you're in your car,

you might as go all the way there. Yeah, yeah. Right. And I think just the way you presented it like a hat. Oh, right. What would you've described it as, Just go pick up, you're just going to go pick up food. Yeah, I think it's still like a compromise.

I'd say it's still, all right. It's still further than most people would want to go. When I go on the dish podcast, I would say it's a compromise. Like, I would say, a hack. I would only call it a hack if you get to stay at your home and they will still deliver it to you. And you found a way of making that happen. If you have to drive to Chingford and sit in a car park. Well, well, I did think of that.

But it's more costly. Because what they do is they'll deliver it to Chinkford. then I send an Uber to Chinkford to pick it up from there to my house. Again, it doesn't feel like that. No. Yeah, as you say, it will cost you more. Yeah. What if you use someone else's Uber account?

I suppose that's a hack. Yeah, sure. Your mates or your housemates. Yeah. They've gone to the Lou quickly. You pick up their phone, get an Uber, get the pickup. That's stressful. So the hack is order Uber's on other people's phones.

Done. That's a hack. That's the hack. It doesn't have to be for when you want an Uber, really. It doesn't have to be from when you want a Macaron. pie. But I think it's better when it's for the pie. Yeah. Yeah. I think a hack just suggests

you've fooled them in some way. I haven't fooled them. They've beat the system. They've hacked me then, if that's the case. Like how's this for a hack, right? Go on. M&S do these little egg pots now that are like mixed with like smoky bean. It's a smoky bean egg pot. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah. The Shooker. But for my taste

they're not eggy enough. Right. So I'll also get the individual egg pot, which has the spinach in it. Which is actually quite a deep pot as well. And I'll just like slam the smoky beans and eggs in there and then smash it all up. And then it's like a much more edgy version. So I've got my, my egg ratio there and I've got some greens in there. I would actually call that a remix. Not a hack.

That's for me more of a remix. And eggy remix. Yeah. James is a food DJ. Yeah. That's what some people say on the streets. Oh, glad I'm getting talked about on the streets. Yeah.

Do drink drink? Drink. Dream drink. I've actually bought it for you guys. Okay. as a gift. Now, I did see, you had the bag, then the came a bag was black. Yes.

So you can't see through it. Yeah. It's like you bought it from a porno store. But I didn't, I can assure you of that. But I think I know when it, it looked to me like a, go on. A distinctive bottle.

I thought you maybe bought some supermarkets. Oh, you've had it. No, you've had it already. So far, Melvin, your plan of things that we've not had. It's not done well. We've got you every time. Who brought the, It was Nigeria.

No, I think I've actually You've just had it. I've tried one before, but like, hey, but get them out. I've tasted it on a TV show before. No, I don't want to do it anymore. If you've both had it, it's been a long time. It's been a first time.

Well, I actually can't remember what it's like. It's been so long. I think this is, I do want to drink it now. It's a pity sip. But I'd like to drink it now. It's a pity sip. I do want to drink it. Right.

Pretend to be excited. Yeah, yeah. I'm excited. I want to drink it. I was annoyed that you. That you decided. to go back on it. Thank you.

Melvin, last time, so I was recently, well, not recently, but within the last year, I was walking down the street. And someone was walking up to me, a man who I think had been maybe, he was inebriated on something, and he had a bottle of super malt. And as he was walking past me,

he tried to shove it in my hands, and he went, just take it, thanks for all the laughs. Just take it, thanks for the laughs. He can't be tipsy because He wasn't drinking this He's a man that I regularly bump into And mainly he's doing poppers Okay

But uh Every time I've seen him He's been doing poppers He offers me poppers But he offered me a supermort once And said please thank you for all the last Was that your first supermort from him? No I didn't drink it because I didn't accept it from him

Because I don't trust this man I'll say hi to him when I see him But What's really funny is Ben just left the room To go and get a bottle opener And he's going to come back in realize that their twist off. Sorry, Ben.

But still, my hands are so weak that I can never do a twist off. I've had to literally use my, but I'd use my jacket. And that's a nice jacket. To put it over. Cheers, everyone. Cheers, everyone. Cheers. Eyes, it has to be with the eyes. It's bad luck. Eyes.

It's a super bowl. Yeah. Drink that in. Yeah. It's so good. It's actually sweeter than I remember. It is. That is delicious, though. With B vitamins.

But it has to be. So it's healthy for you. Yeah. I believe. Yeah. A lot of sugar as well. No artificial sweeteners or flavors, they say. Yeah.

I believe that there's no, I mean, it is like, there's a readiness to it. It's such a distinct taste, isn't it, the super malt? That would be the malt. That's the malt. It has to be drunk, cold.

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. That's delicious. Weirdly can't stop sipping. On a hot day. I should have accepted it from that guy. Hot day, spicy food. That's the good food. Yeah.

Well, I feel like I've let you guys down. You're not at all, that's delicious. And I don't, how many supermults have we had in the past, Ben? Once. One supermalt? No, Baba did it. No, it was one of the Nigerians. He didn't bring it in.

Okay. But he selected that as he's... You win. You chose it. Okay. All right, fair play. Yeah. Yeah.

I should just done it before him. Because I'm going to look like a copycat now. No, I don't think you look like a copycat at all. I think anyone can tell that that was genuine, you know. I'm quite angry. It's still, you know, we've done so many episodes to bring in a drink that has only been picked once. Okay. It's quite tough.

Yeah. The amount of times we've had, you know, so many other things. Yeah. Everyone's picking, you know, coat zero and stuff. Yeah. Cozzi, what a boring drink. So, you know. And we love it every time someone brings joll off as well.

Yeah. Okay. We love talking about the joll off. Yeah. And even bring food for you? No, not really. Occasionally they might bring it. Every night again, but we try and discourage it.

Yeah. Okay. But I mean, like, when they say it as part of their dream menu. Okay. I love chatting about droll off. And I still don't, I need to eat more droll off. I ordered way too much on delivery once in the lockdowns. We'd done one of these over Zoom.

So then I really, I was like, I really want whatever the person who chose. Oh, wow. Found someone on delivery that did it. Did not look into the portion sizes. Humongous. Absolutely humongous. That lasted me a week. Was it tasty, though?

Yeah, it's good. Yeah. Good stuff. I was like, how, how, what old are the family size? That's an auntie that's made it for you. Yeah, yeah. She's made it thinking you're going to keep it for a week because that's what my mum would do.

You'd go over to the house and she'll be like, before you leave, she'd have like a little care package for you. Good to go. Do you mean? I used to go to, there's a street for a place called Joloff Mama. And, yeah, the boxes are absolutely gigantic. Yeah. But I'm nail it.

I'm eating the whole thing. Well, that's part of the culture. If you go to a party, you bring your own Tupperware. Yeah. So you go home with extras. My mum, she's such a, she likes to store food so much. I got her a new fridge and she refused to get rid of the old one. So if you go to my mum's house, she just has a fridge freezer in the living room.

I can't get rid of that. If anyone wants a fridge freezer, let me know. What's in the living room? What, anything? It's still food. Like she saves up for like my sister, my niece, my nephews, anyone that wants to come over. It's like the storage fridge and then the one in the kitchen is the fridge. fridge. I love that.

Do you grow up drinking super malt? That is like any family parties. Yeah. That's how you test a good party. If they got super malt, you turn up. Any super malt? Yeah. Any super malt? No. Rubbish party.

So I only ever went to rubbish parties. Actually, we have had a guest on before who says that Sakisa said white parties are the worst. They're not. They're not. I like them. You sure? Yeah, yeah. My next one never used to play Agadu. never heard it anywhere else. That was a really good white party. And we don't hear that enough now.

You know, bring it back. Do you, I mean, you're a DJ? Yeah. Do you ever drop Agadu? I don't. But if there was a nice remix, I'd definitely drop it now. I feel like if someone did like a nice house version of it.

Yeah. Calvin Harris. Of the events that you go to, can you think of any event where you'd get away with that? What, playing Agadoo? If there was a Calvin Harris movie. I do, butlins. Yeah?

Oh. Oh. Yeah. They'd love it, a butlins. Buckling's weekender. Yeah. Yeah. What's your favorite song to DJ?

What's the one currently? Currently, currently that you're the one that you look forward to drop in the most. You're like, I'm about to play this song. It's going to go off. I love this track. Okay, so I love Funky House music. And there's an artist called Egypt. It's been out for years.

But Stormsy has recently done a new tune with Odell and sampled that track, that original track. So I love playing that now because I feel like you can, get the old crowd who remember the original tune in the morning, and then you get the new crowd who know the Stormsy one. So I like that. Nice. What's the song called?

So the Egypt's one's called In the Morning. In the Morning. Yeah, in the morning. Yeah, funky house, classic. I love popping on Radio One sometimes. It's a different world for me. Who do you listen to at the moment? Well, I listen to a lot of metal. Oh, is that your go-to?

Yeah, that's my go-to. And I very rarely listen to the radio. So it's just all these names of like artists and stuff. Like, this could be made up. Well, you'd love Alex Holcomb. Yeah, yeah, Alex is great. Yeah, Alex is great. Yeah, Jack Saunders dips into a bit of metal as well.

Dan Picarter, of course. Yeah, Dan's a G. Like, he's probably your go-to. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's a nice man. Yeah, he's a lovely one, isn't he? Are you both into metal? I like metal, but I like loads of different music. Different stuff.

And, like, I'll send Ed every night and again, I'll hear a metal album I like. I send it to Ed to see what he makes of it. Okay. Often it's horrible. Yeah, James looks really weird stuff. Like what? gutter snipe What is it

One of my favourite albums of the years The gutter snipe album Extinction burst It sounds horrible It's really gross But what genre is it Is it even a noise metal Just like it's just like

Two people in what sounds like a cellar in Leeds Just like playing music That is meant to sound like the end of the world Right And you'd listen to that I love it I love that album So it's one of my favourite albums

Would you guys listen to that in the car Like for me I listen to it walking around On a nice countryside walk, maybe at bath time. I listened to it while I was cooking. Heavy metal? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow.

I find very, very aggressive, loud music, incredibly soothing. Wow! I can't, like, it's weird. I'm the opposite. I'll go to the gym and listen to a slow jam. Yeah. I'll listen to like Usher while I'm pushing weights. And people laugh at me, but I'm like,

your PT says do slow reps. Right. What's better than slow music? Yeah. Yeah, well, I'll do that as well. I often find myself at the gym, not doing the weights, if I'm honest. I'll be on, like, the bike or something. It's fine, whatever works.

But I'll be listening to some, yeah, like, slow, the Kelsey Lou album this year. Great. Really slow R&B, kind of like, uh, atmospheric stuff. I'm cycling. It's like sexy. It makes you feel sexy on the bike. I just feel sexy. He likes to feel sexy on the bike, man.

It's good. Well, it's nice. I feel sexy everywhere. Bikes and cars. Except in hotel rooms where you've got a nice place. bucket dumped in your yeah apart from that

sort of real it's the only time you've not felt sexy in the old life when you're in an ice bucket like a hat

I was just scared yeah yeah yeah he was so so violent yeah who does that he could have

he could have he could have and if he's listening you've made two new enemies today yeah I don't I hope he's not

listening no he won't be listening imagine if he's he's a fan of the podcast that would be yeah

probably ashamed of himself now he should be but so diverse for your listenership. Like you've got, you know, mean bullies listening as well. Hey, if there are any mean bullies listening,

do let us know online. And stop it. Yeah, stop it. But we would like to know if you do have any mean bullies listening. So, and be honest with yourselves, if you're a mean bully, do message the podcast on any social media platform. Let Benito know that you're a mean bully.

Yeah. And make sure you say your full name. Say, I am. My name is, and your full name, and I am a mean bully. Do you think people know that they're bullies? Because I realized later on down the line, I used to give one of my cousins a hard time. I called him triangle head. What?

Trianglehead. Yeah. Because he had really pointed chin. So I'd like to admit I was a bully for a small period of time. To one specific guy? To one cousin. Yeah.

How's he doing now? He's very well. Yeah. Very well. He's the mascot for Derry Lee. You dream dessert, Melvin. Ah, now. This is something that I don't think has been covered on a podcast.

Okay, but don't, you don't set yourself up with this, Melvin, because a few times along the way here, you've been really upset because there was a whole mac and cheese thing. Correct. And I got you on that. Yes. There was a super malt. Right.

And you weren't happy with that. Let's not forget the time you shouted out Nando's olives. Immediately after saying, I'm going to pick places you've never been. Yeah. So... And you've offered up hacks that aren't hacks. Let's just steady yourself here before you say whatever. it is.

Yeah. And don't think you need to give us things that we've not had before. Yes. You don't need to do that. It's not part of the show. I know it would be nice for you do at least get one.

Yeah. After having made the mission statement at the beginning. Well, hang on skewed. We didn't know skewed. We didn't know. Didn't know. Remember that.

Yeah. Palm Bay. Palm Bay, we didn't know. Okay. But that was sort of... So, I'm going to slightly change this now. What? You're getting too in your head about it.

And you're second guessing yourself. Yeah. It might be that the first one we haven't heard of. No, you've heard of it. heard of it, but the method that no one's focused on. The hot and cold combination. Has anyone discussed that yet? What?

Mixing hot and cold stuff together. Yeah, that's come up before. As a dessert? Well, having something hot with something cold. Yeah, no one's discussed that, have they? What are you talking about? Like ice screaming and a hot apple pot. Yeah.

Yes. It's one of the most common things. What are you talking about? Was that it? Yeah, that was it. Yeah. Like an apple tart, and for me, I love a hot and cold combination. So apple crumble.

Then with ice cream. But no one's focused. They may have said, oh, I want apple pine ice cream, but they've not referenced the temperature. They have, they have. They said temperature. Yeah, people talk about, you know, especially with apple pie. I'd say that's the most common one is they say, like, whether they want hot custard with it or cold ice cream. And they say, and a lot of the time they'll say stuff like, like, like,

Oh, no, I don't like, you know, hot stuff with something else that's hot or I don't like cold stuff with something that's hot. So people have their preferences, especially with Apple Pie. It's really hard to be original on this. But you don't need to be about it, because we can talk about it and we'll get loads out in the conversation, but it's so funny how much you've set yourself up for needing to be original, and then you said things that so many people have talked about.

People have bought up this. Hot Apple Pie with cold ice cream. Yeah. Yeah. That's your dessert. That's it. So, okay, all right. Or I can, I can figure.

No. You don't need to change it. Was that your original one? That was the original one. The original one was hot apple pie with cold ice cream. Yeah. That's nice. That's lovely.

It's delicious. Yeah, that's it. So I would just say that. Is there any way specific that you get it from? Or does someone cook it for you? I feel like an ivy tart. Yeah. Apple tart.

And then they flambay it with some kind of alcohol. Nice. I think it might be a brandy or something. And then you have to ask for it on the side because it doesn't come together. And you have it on the side and eat that. So yeah, the ivy. That's lovely.

Yeah, which is very nice. Laura Whitmore can get you free tables. Oh. She gets a hookup, but she just posts about it. That's good, I didn't know that. Yeah. If you ever want to go. Does that go for anyone watching?

Yeah. If anyone's watching, just message Laura Whitmore and say, oh, can we go with you? Ivy. Yeah. Because you took me and Ricky once. Yeah.

Great. I didn't pay a penny. She just posts it online. I'll mess. I don't have Laura's number, but I'll message Ian. Yeah. You can message, Ian doesn't have the same thing. But I'll say,

can I have Lord's number please? Got to go Laura. Can I have done Ian before? Yeah. He just talks about gaming and stuff. Yeah. And Pokemon cards. Exactly.

Yeah. But Laura is straight to the heart, I'll say. Yeah. Much easier. Yeah. Much easier. All right. I'll see if I can get Laura's number off Ian.

Yeah. Yeah. So I shouldn't have. set it up, I should just said, oh, apple pie and ice cream. Yeah. And do you remember when I warned you multiple times to not set it up? You did. Yeah. You did. I don't know for my mistakes. And you were like, no, no, no, no. No one would have bought this up before. The hot and cold combination. Sometimes I feel like you've got to back yourself. Yeah. Yeah. I came prepared to talk about temperatures. Yeah. And I was thinking, I hope they haven't mentioned it.

Well, this is, I, I agree with you on the temperatures. I want hot dessert, cold, cold side. Because some people want hot and hot. Nah. What's the point? Yeah. Hot apple crumble, hot custard. Do you know what's worse? Go on. Room temperature. I don't want anything room temperature as a dessert.

Hate it. Apart from baklava. Delicious. Yeah. Apple crumbull and ice cream is what reminds me of being at home the most. Actually, probably rhubarb crumble maybe. Really? And ice cream.

Like after a roast dinner? Yeah. I actually don't mind the rhububub. Do you know what people don't? have enough of, and this is what I should have said, an apple strudel. Yes. Strudel's good.

I always think of Apple Stoodle is in glorious bastards where they eat the apple strudel. The way they film the whole thing, we're putting the cream on it. And the crunch, the sound of it in that scene as well. It is, even though it is a genuine

Nazi intimidating a young Jewish person who's trying to hide from him, the strudel looks absolutely amazing. That's how you know it's a good day. And it's horrible what it all represents in that scene as well. I'll re-watch that because, you know, another hack of mine. Right. Steady on here.

Take a slow run up to this. I know you don't like my use of the word hack. I've got a bad memory, so I can always rewatch something I've already seen. And it's brand new again. It's not a hack, no. The hack is, yeah. The hack is have bad memory. To not remember stuff very well.

I'm similar. Yeah. I wouldn't call it a hack. What would you call it? I'd say it's making the best of a, bad situation. Okay, then let's do that. James is cursed

with a very good memory, especially when it comes to films. So that's it. You can't re-watch anything. Yeah, I can't really re-watch anything. And when a guest comes on who's been in films, it's awful because I can't stop my... No, because I can't stop myself from just telling them... About the film?

Yeah. Yeah, I actually ask them questions. I just go, hey, how you filmed this and this happened. Do you do that then? Yeah. Yeah, I have to stop in my... That's why I sit in the middle seat. I feel bad for you now

Yeah, it doesn't go well I can't wait to see the Sip sentence again That's wicked Yeah What a great movie Yeah, it's good Yeah, it's gonna blow your mind all over again I can't wait

I'll tell you the twist now She'll forget it anyway Go ahead It's his brother No way Yeah yeah Yeah yeah They kiss him

They realize it's his brother I don't read your men Back to you now Yeah See how you feel about it now And to remind you Yeah, yeah, because you won't know. You want your mum's Perrier water with a twist of lime.

Yep. You would like sourdough from honey and smoke. Yeah. You would like olives from Nandoes and a Hulumi from Skewed. You want your mum's joll off rice with spicy chicken. You would like macaroni pie from Palm Bay. You want some super malt and you would like a hot apple pie and cold ice cream. How did you put that in there so quick?

I read it. I read it out from here. I don't know. I was his memory again. It's not my memory. It's just on there. It's written down. It's incredible.

Incredible. Because I didn't even send an email or anything with that list. It's our hack. Can you see anything in this room that could have possibly written it down in there? Ben? Yeah, yeah. Oh, him. That's laptop.

Oh, Ben, oh, Ben's transferred it. Is it like an iPad in there? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you know what that is? What's that? A hack.

That's a hack. First thing I'm going to do tonight, we hacked it. Go and Google the word hack, the meaning. Yeah. Because I feel like I've not used it correctly today. Definitely not. Yeah, not. Not once. Definitely not.

But like, you know, we've still learnt loads this episode. Yeah. We've still learned stuff from you as well. Yeah. I don't want you thinking you haven't taught us anything today. No. And that's the main thing. Yeah.

We've all collectively learned something. Yeah, you've surprised us a lot. Thank you. Yeah, loads of surprises. Twist and turns. Good. Thank you so much, Melvin. Thanks for having me.

Thank you, Melvin. Thank you so much to Melvin for coming on. That was as fun as fun as I thought it was going to be. Absolutely fantastic. We had him second-guessing himself straight out the gate. So many things that he was certain. We would never would have heard of it before. We'd heard of it all.

It couldn't happen to a nicer guy. And look, if you just listen to the audio of this, if you are able to watch the YouTube version of it, the look on his face every single time he realizes that we've already heard of the thing or we've already tasted it or whatever is really funny. He didn't start tricky

because Nando's. Nando's. But when you called Supermol, he was so angry. He wasn't angry, actually. He was like, he just jumped up in his chair. Yeah.

And I knew it from before we even started recording that it was Super Bowl because I've seen it in the back. Yeah. Not even just a slightly, the outline, just in the black bag. And I was like, that's Super Malt. That's Super Malt.

Check Melvin out on Celebrity Master Chef. Listen to him. on Radio 1. Just... Go to Bartlin's, a C&D, Jain. Go to Barlin's and see Mention, just do anything you can with Melvin. He's a lovely bloke. Try and be friends with him. Yeah. And thank you, Melvins, for not saying Doom Bar, of course.

Thank you so much to Melvin for coming on the pod. We will see you another time soon. Come see me on tour at gamble.com.com. Bye. Hi, I'm Nick Eshuchler. I'm an author and screenwriter and host of The Good Immigrant Podcast. Back in 2016, I edited a collection of essays called You guessed it, The Good Immigrant. It brought together stories of what it meant to be an immigrant at that time.

It was a reflection of life as a person of colour in the UK. To celebrate 10 years since its publication, I'm speaking to some of the contributors about everything that has happened since then. People like Nish Kumar, Selina Godin, Hymish Patel, Koko Khan, Inoua Ellums and many, many more. The Good Immigrant Podcast is out every Tuesday, wherever you get your podcasts.