Off The Telly - My gladiator name would be The Trumpeter

Episode Date: January 29, 2025

Natalie Cassidy and Joanna Page chat about all things on and off the telly. Nat and Jo have a much needed catch up about The Traitors final, what did they think of the seer? Plus they chat about: Severance on Apple TV+, a series directed by Ben Stiller that's got lots of buzz at the moment; a new drama with James Norton called Playing Nice on ITVX; and Gladiaaaaaators is back on BBC One and iPlayer, what do Nat and Jo think of the two new gladiators?What they can’t stop watching, what they definitely aren’t going to bother with, new releases and comforting classics – TV is timeless and no telly is out of bounds. As well as having a natter about what’s on TV, they share backstage goss from the world of telly, whilst also cracking up about the more humbling moments in their lives. Self-confessed TV addicts and stars of two of the biggest shows on our screens, EastEnders and Gavin and Stacey, Natalie and Joanna are the perfect companions to see what’s occurring on and off the telly.Timecodes for shows discussed today are:1:47 - The Traitors (BBC) 15:53 - Playing Nice (ITVX) 20:44 - Severance (Apple TV+) 28:42 - Gladiators (BBC) Get in touch by sending us a message or voice note via WhatsApp to 03306 784704.Hosts: Natalie Cassidy and Joanna Page Producer: Georgia Keating Executive Producer: Richard Morris Commissioning Editor: Rhian Roberts Production Co-ordinator: Becky Carewe-Jeffries Sounds Editor: Arlie Adlington Music by MCassoOff The Telly is a BBC Studios Audio Production for BBC Sounds.

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so thank you and also let's just say we probably will have some spoilers on here there are going to be some spoilers from the Traitors final because we're chatting about it and we've both seen the whole thing. But in case you haven't,

we are talking about the Traitors final and the outcome of it. Only I'm one. Hello, fellow stripy top person. How has this happened? Because we haven't spoke this morning. We haven't spoken. We haven't seen each other.

I mean, this is quite amazing. This shows that we are like full on in tune with each other, mind you, doesn't it? We're wearing the same clothes. We are the same people. We are the same people. We are. We're like that. We're interlinked with each other.

ESP, whatever you call it. That is really quite amazing. Yeah. Is that right? Yeah. Extra special powers. Yeah. Oh, so we are virtual this week, Jo.

We're not together, are we? We're not together. You'd swear that we were, though, because we are in matching clothes. But no, we are in our own studios, separate. It's quite good, actually, that we're separate because clothes. But no, we are in our own studios. Separate. It's quite good, actually, that we're separate because we look like a couple of knobs in the studio with the same clothes on. We turned up and we had to sit next to each other like this. Tweedle-dum and Tweedle-D.

We had to come and get a coffee like this. I'd have had to put a jumper on or something. I'd have been bacon. I mean, can you imagine? We are like Tweedle-Dum and Tweed and Tweedledee well before we go any further what did you think of the traitors final oh my goodness me I absolutely loved it but as soon as I knew it was all faithfuls yeah I was a bit like oh what the point? I liked it up until the whole Sia thing. I mean, you know, I liked all of it up until then.

And the last but one episode was really riveting. And it was like, oh, my God, who is going to be the Sia? What's going to happen? And then the minute that I just thought, oh, my God, the minute that Charlotte was revealed, where can you go from there? And then there's no jeopardy or anything in the end. Yeah. It's all fake spells. So who really cares?

I did love the Sia thing. I love the way it ended in the penultimate episode. Me too. I'm slightly obsessed with Francesca as well. I love Francesca and I love Alexander. I think Alexander's amazing. I wish that he'd been in it right from the very, very start.

And I don't get why they keep saying, you survived the death match, so, you know, oh, you were a traitor. It was random. The death match was completely random. Isn't that like going, oh, God, I won against the ace? You know, that random card game? Yeah. Oh, so it must mean that you're a traitor.

It was a completely random thing, the death match. Can I just talk to you very quickly about the other night it was my niece's birthday. And as a family, we popped round there and we had some food and what have you. And Joanie said, let's play the traitors. So all we did, we didn't do anything, but I played Claudia and I just tapped people on the shoulder. And then the whole evening, it was so good.

You can just play it anywhere. And Eliza's playing it at school at lunchtime. It's turned into a really big thing. Yes. Very good. You can just play it anywhere. And Eliza's playing it at school at lunchtime. It's turned into a really big thing. Yes. Very good. So, you know, last night we started on the third series of the American version of it. So we are like, boom, slap back in. And it's the same challenges.

They've just done the boat. They're doing all that. But the American ones, they're really ruthless. And they've got them all from like Survivor and Big Brother and the games. And they're like full on. Oh, really? And they are full on like gamers from reality shows. And they are ruthless.

And they've gone in and there's this one fella, something Rob. Oh, what's his name now? I can't remember. But he's ruthless. And he really, he's gone and he's like, right, what's the game plan? What is this? And he's really like got this whole plan going ahead. And it's brilliant because they are so ruthless. I know, but I do feel like you're the one who likes the American stuff because you're

Mrs. Competitive and you're like, right, we've got to win. So you like that. But I like the emotional, British, polite one. Yeah. I think. But yeah, I'm gutted that it's finished. But yeah, and I didn't particularly like this. I loved the build up to the sea.

What were they supposed to kind of do? Because I felt really quite upset for Charlotte because she'd worked really hard. And then kind of when the sea happens, the only thing that you can really do is go, right, well, just get rid of Francesca and get rid of Charlotte. We don't know who's lying. Just get rid of both of them.

It was kind of like there was nothing else they could do aside from that. And then it takes all the jeopardy away, doesn't it? It does. And I did feel sorry for Francesca because I really thought that Leanne was going to trust her. I know. I was disappointed there. Really disappointed. But I understand why Leanne did what she did.

Listen, it's just a brilliant game. It's just a brilliant show because it's just an experiment of people's personalities and how people act. And we are all obsessed with each other. I've just got to wait for my hair to get a little bit longer down to my shoulders. And then I think I'm going to go for the Francesca fringe. I'm looking out for a brown corduroy jacket. And basically, I mean, she's like my new style inspiration. I agree.

I've started following her on Instagram. Because she's an interior designer. Yeah. And she's got a page on the house as well. You want to see some of the fabrics? Oh my God, really? Yeah. Does she do her own kind of style as well as the interior design? Yeah, everything. She's just style. Style all

the way through. And she seems so lovely as well. She does. I really like, my two favourites were Francesca and Alexander. I loved Alexander. Wasn't he lovely? He was lovely, but I still love Tyler, who we had on the pod. So there we go. Yes. And you know, right, can I just say that with Alan Cummings

one, right, I was watching it last night and there was the bit, they were doing the bit with the cages coming down in the woods, right, you know, for the third series. Yeah. Yeah. And the cages were coming down and Alan was in the middle of the woods, right, for the third series yeah yeah and the cages were coming down and alan was in the middle of the woods right talking and hosting it all and right in front of him on the woodland floor was a gold basket with his black dog just sitting in the basket in the middle of

the woods watching the whole task and then at the end of one of the episodes when they're all coming upstairs as if they're all going upstairs as if they're going upstairs to bed, Atlin's dog runs up the stairs and he's got like a tartan beret and he's wearing a tartan kilt as well. The dog. What, the dog?

Yes, it's amazing. Oh, I love that. That is brilliant. I loved it. Have you ever read the children's books to the kids? Claude. Claude the dog. No, I haven't.

Oh, you've got to read Claude. Oh my God, I haven't. Claude to the kids. Claude. Claude the dog. No, I haven't. Oh, you've got to read Claude. Oh, my God. I haven't. Claude in the circus. Claude goes to town. Claude in the show. Oh, I got it. And he's a really, really camp dog.

And his best friend is a bobbly sock. Oh, my God. That is brilliant. Oh, my God. I'm going to have to get them because Bo would love those. I think if you look it up, it was a telly programme as well. I can't remember what channel, but the books are brilliant. Oh my God, that's why, right, it's in my head.

I've never bought them for the kids, but you know, years ago during COVID, Kit, he did a whole project on Claude the dog and Claude had gone to Paris. There you go. And there was the teacher and then there was Claude and there was something about the teacher wearing like a really nice beige mac and with a beret. That's where I remember it from. And it was Claude goes to Paris. Claude's very stylish and he carries a lot round.

So, yeah, that's what that just reminded me of because Claude would have worn a kilt and a beret. And Claude also probably would have worn a striped top like this. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. We have had so many voice notes from you guys. There are quite a few to get through. So shall we play a few?

Oh, let's have a listen. Hello, ladies. Lindsay from Stafford here. I just want to say, Natalie Cassidy, if you are not bush, then I will eat my hat. Honestly, all the clues are there. And then listening to your voice and the clue is the song, Very, Very East End. Come on, come on.

And I noticed when Jo was questioning you about this, you were very coy. So, yeah, I think you are Bush. She was coy. If not, it's someone who sounds very much like you. Well, I tell you what, I agree with her because I was watching it. Oh, did Inspector Clouseau over there? I was looking at the clothes, right?

There was, I don't know if you've got a university degree or anything at all like that, but it said the Dean on the bottom. And my first thought was Dean Gaffney. dean where where did it say that i don't know what you're talking about right it was it was in all of the clues right and there was a letter and it was as if um there was some sort of diploma or you know like qualification for a degree and it said signed the dean now i just looked at that and went, oh, my God, Dean Gaffney. There was the song Our House. The fact that it was sung in a Cockney accent

was basically what sounded like your voice. But hang on a minute, Jo. Anyone could try and put a voice on because they all put voices on, don't they? Someone was telling me about this. But no, there was another clue as well. Bush was talking about there was something that said director. Bush was talking about, there was something that said director. Oh my God, there was the Ricky Gervais mention again.

And I know you've just worked with Ricky Gervais. And there was something else about, oh, I can't remember if Bush said something about a soap or if it was Jonathan Ross who was saying something about a soap and something about a street and everything. And I thought about Albert Square. I'm sorry, right, but... Well, I am looking forward, I have to tell you, for this all to be over.

Really? Because I am not Bush and it's driving me nuts. Is everybody saying it to you? Are people saying it to you? Yeah, loads of people now. What are they saying? Loads and loads of people. Just loads of messages.

Are you Bush? You are Bush. And I don't want to be a Bush. I don't want to be all of i don't i i don't i don't want to be all of this do you know what i mean i just i really i'm looking forward to when this show's over are you bush no oh my god i feel like we're in the traitors well are you a bush no oh let's have another voice note hi girls, girls. It's Lucy from South Wales. I've had the flu over the last week and I've binge watched Joe's nature program.

And oh, my God, she's got the sandals on. And I think it's in the last episode. She's got the sandals on. And I thought, oh, my God, I can smell the vinegar. So, I thought oh my god I can smell the vinegar so yeah that's what I've taken from her nature program that she wore the sandals still loving the podcast

keep it up girls bye oh Lucy's with me now you can actually I'm pleased you can understand from the visual what I have to put up with. Do you know, right, I watched one of the episodes and there's a bit and I'm sitting on the sofa back home with the kids, chatting away, telling them all about everything.

And I'm not in the least bit bothered about what I'm wearing, right, or what I look like or anything at all. Yeah, but that's brilliant by the way I know but I did look at myself right and I'm literally wearing a pair of socks right for warmth with the sandals on top of the socks and I looked at myself and I was like bloody hell you've even done it on camera they've been on the show I've seen them what I'm worried about is you've been around all the stuff for all the animals and whatever, and then you're at home with them on. I know. I know that's true mind, isn't it? I think I'm going to put them in the washing machine

because that is true. I don't even like the thought of that myself. But I did. I looked at myself and I thought, good God, not only am I wearing the sandals, but I'm wearing them on top of socks. Quite abandoned on the telly. I think it's really refreshing and brilliant. And I think you look so fresh faced

and you're really in the moment and you're with the kids. And if you're not at home, you're doing it with all the wildlife and the animals. It is so brilliant. That's what I think. Well, thank you. It's my pleasure.

And I mean it. I do mean that. I'm not just saying it. Should we have another voice note? Yeah. Hi, Natalie and Joanna. My name is Maximus. I absolutely love the podcast. And Joanna, I'm such a big it should we have another voice note yeah hi Natalie and Joanna my name is Maximus I absolutely love the podcast and Joanna I'm such a big Gavin and Stacey fan so I thought

the Christmas special was amazing but my voice note is for Natalie about Amanda Land can we expect to see one of my favourite niche characters you as the teaching assistant can we see you coming back for an episode of Amanda Land Amanda Amanda Land is something that we should watch. Thank you, Maximus. It is the spin-off to Motherland. And it's Amanda and her mum, played by Joanna Lumley, and still around, Irish Anne. It is all very, it looks hilarious.

Can we please watch it, Jo? Oh, God, 100%. When's it starting? Soon, I think. Very, very soon. Let's do that. But unfortunately, Maximus, I haven't had the call. Who knows?

I'm waiting. I'm around. But yeah, that is one that we have got to do because it just looks fab. And anything connected to Motherland, I want to watch. I'm in there. Fantastic. Let's have another voice note.

Hi, Jo and Nat. This is Jo, short for Joanna Louise, which I think is your name, Jo? That's my name too! That's on Wikipedia. I've not been scouring Welsh birth records or anything creepy. I just want to say a massive thank you to you both, actually. It's been quite a tough time for us as a family recently. My mum has been in hospital for a few weeks and has just been diagnosed with esophageal cancer which is which has been rough but I discovered

your podcast a few weeks ago thank god and it has been such a source of comfort and joy for me I can't tell you it's I listen to it every day on the way to and from the hospital um and it's I can't tell you how much it's helping me honestly you girls are amazing even just now I just left the hospital and mum was very poorly so I wasn't feeling great when I got in the car but I whacked your podcast on and honestly I was laughing out loud at some of the bits you girls are just amazing um so once again just a massive thank you from me and keep up the good work oh that is so kind thank you so so much it's yeah it's really nice to hear that we can brighten people's days isn't it Joe yeah that's such a lovely message and my god

we're thinking of you absolutely yeah we're thinking and if you know i'm just so glad that we're just putting a smile on your face and making you feel you know a bit brighter sometimes and that's a really lovely message yeah thank you so much for getting in touch it's really lovely to hear well i felt quite bad because i knew that I needed to watch the stuff for us now today, but I was still in the middle of Black Doves, which I've absolutely loved. You've got to watch it. The thing is, Jo, I get it and I understand it, but we have got quite a lot of telly to watch and then you go off piste

and watch a whole series of something else. Literally watch the whole series of something else. Literally watch the whole series. But we've got to watch the things that we agree on things to watch. So we've got three very different shows this week. We've got Severance on Apple TV Plus,

which everybody is saying is just like the best show ever. We've got Playing Nice on ITVX, which is a new James Norton drama. And Gladiators is back on BBC

One and iPlayer. Right, what should we start with? Playing Nice with a gorgeous James Norton. It's his production company now. Yeah, it is, isn't it? And I really like the cast. I particularly like his

wife, Niamh Algar. I really like her. I've seen her in other stuff and I really enjoy watching her. Jessica Brown-Findlay, James McArdle. I think the whole cast is really good. Oh, I love James McArdle. I just can't. I think because

I think because I've just done so much on Black Davs and I just... I was just about to say to you, don't start slagging off the show we're meant to watch because, oh, I'll fast forward through it because I've watched loads of other telly. Is this where we are now? It's about five or six episodes of Black Dabs and I was like, oh God, I've got to watch, you know,

play in night. And I put it on and then it reminded me of Don't Look Now, you know, the film with Donald Sutherland in the beginning where he's sprinting along and then he sees the Mac floating and everything. I haven't seen it all. I've watched two. I've been super busy. I haven't been squeezing in another series of something else to watch,

but I have watched two of them and I'm really enjoying it and I really don't have a guess of where it's going to go. Of course you have a guess. Yes. I really like the awkwardness and also I'm a bit biased because where it is set is where we travel. That's where we go to Cornwall. Yeah, it's nice.

So I'm going, oh, look, I know that rock. Yeah. We've sat on that rock. Oh, look at that road. We've been there, which is another reason why I'm really enjoying it. Yeah. Do you know though right I was watching it

in the first episode and I thought everybody you know whenever a show starts everybody's always so happy and the kitchen's huge and you know she's getting

feeding the child or something and he comes up and he gives her a cuddle behind and she just smiles and a morning for me is like not swearing in front of the children but swearing under my breath

going where are the fucking computers? Oh my God, have you done breakfast? If James comes to give me a hug I'm like we just don't have time get in the car. It's like never a morning which is just like where James will come up and give me a cuddle

and I'm like love you and here we go Bo eat your cereal. Yes, bye kids. Have a great day. I'm literally like I'm about to explode because I have to ask Kit about seven times to put his socks on. No one's cleaning their teeth. Nobody's eating breakfast.

I mean, the other morning, right? I think Eva, this morning it was, right? Eva was wandering around with a metal detector at about ten to eight. And they needed to leave the house at quarter to eight. Good girl. Did she find anything nice? Any of your charms knocking about? No, no, she didn't find anything, right?

But she was going near to metal because all I could hear while I was in my panic of getting everybody out of the door was just... Like that. Just like constant. I just thought, this is just too much. It's just too much.

But I just thought, mornings aren't like that. But I thought it was beautiful. I just loved the way that it all looked. I really liked the cast. And so I watched some of the first one. And then I thought, I'm just going to get to the last episode. I'm going to skip the three in the middle, get to the last episode, fast forward all the way through it,

and then just find out what happens in the end, which is what I did. But I think it's because I wasn't in the right frame of mind. I'm wondering if I want to know. No, I'd never tell you. I'd never tell you because you're in it and you're enjoying it. What are your thoughts? I don't know if the psycho Scottish guy, Miles, can't cope at the end and does something terrible to the boy

is what I've got in my head. Obviously where it starts with the Mac floating. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. I'm not even in the court or anything. I saw a clip of a court case. I'm like, oh, they do go to court. So I've not seen any of that yet.

I just really love the idea. You're just watching it going, oh my God, what would you do if this was you? And obviously he's so clever with the camera that he's given them and the gummies that he's found out about and he's setting everything up, you know, to take the boy away from them. Yeah.

And have both kids. I think as well, right, with shows like that, I used to be able to sit down and watch stuff like that, right? And these days I can't. And I think it's after having kids, watching something like that

freaks me out so much that I go, oh my God, it's not enjoyable for me anymore because it's after having kids oh yeah watching something like that freaks me out so much that I go oh my god it's not enjoyable for me anymore because it's too close to home it's too much like oh my god that would be so awful I don't actually want to go there or even think about it so that's why I think I prefer to watch like spy things or things which are like not connected to me at all because it started like oh Jesus I don't think I can do this like true crime stories where someone's getting sort of followed and murdered. You're all right with that, though? I'm absolutely fine with someone being followed and murdered.

Perfect. But I can't do anything to do with anything with children. Fair enough. Fair enough. Can we please talk about Severance? Oh, my God. What do you think, right? Because I've watched the first episode and that's it. I haven't even got through.

I haven't even got through the first episode. Oh, my God. Tell me everything. What did you think? Just don't shoot me because, honestly, it's not that I don't want to do my homework for this pod. I don't want anyone to think that. Just had a lot of lines to learn.

Sonia is very busy. Is she really busy? On Albert Square. She's super busy and hopefully people appreciate it when it comes out. Please don't think I'm not enjoying watching telly. I am. I just sat and thought, oh my goodness, this is the best thing I've seen for a very long time

because it is slow, it is beautiful. You know me. I love anything that is a bit arthousey. David Lynch, Mulholland Drive, Twin Peaks. I was like, oh, this is right up my strata. Loved it. How far did you get in the episode? I got up to the lady.

And can I just say, I haven't, as I say, not watched all of it. But the Brit lower, Helly, who plays Helly. Oh, yeah. When she was sat watching the video of herself. And I just thought, do you know what? I don't have a clue what's going on here. And I love it. I love the fact that I can't guess what's going on.

It is really, really clever. I'm sure there'll be a lot of people that might say it's a, you know, it's very, very slow. And, but you know me, I love slow. I love RT. When he did the walk on the corridor, walk down the corridor. Oh my God, yes. It lasted forever.

Yeah, I could have just watched that for an hour. Yeah. And then what about when she goes out of the door and then she goes out and she's in the same corridor and it goes on and on and on and on. Can you imagine that happening to us? Well, you wouldn't know it was happening, would you? No.

That's the thing. Because you've got no idea, have have you because the worlds are severed should we just explain because it is i think it isn't a spoiler to tell people the whole thing about this is you have two worlds right you have a universe in which imagine you're at home now with the kids and the dog and you're doing the shopping and what have you and that's and then when you go to work everything you do in your home life you you don't know you're that you forget that's not you anymore so there's kind of two universes that you're living in but neither of them you know about I can't explain it all yeah I kind of feel that that is what it's like being an actress this is like you've got this life at home where that that is what it's like being an actress but it's like you've

got this life at home where you are mum and it's full-on mum yeah and you know it's all of your life and everything and you can't even think or even remember anything at work and then when you leave home and then you go into work it's like they go into this lift and then suddenly it's like something changes in the lift and then they go up onto the floor and everything from their life outside of their workplace just completely disappears. They have no knowledge of it at all. And they go forward into their work and then they just work. And it's certain people who've signed up to have this done to them in like their brains, sign up to have it done. And then they go into this thing but we don't know.

But why have they signed up? We don't know yet. Why have they signed up? And what is the work? What is the job that they're doing? I really, really feel like this is my new show that I need to watch because it's just beautiful. Ben Stiller directed it.

Yes. And he's amazing. The pictures are amazing. I wonder if he directed all of it. I mean, it's going to be interesting to watch more. I mean, I'm dying to go on the internet and find out what it's all about. Oh, yeah, I'm not going to.. Oh yeah, I'm not going to. No.

Yeah, I'm not going to. This is one to enjoy, isn't it? Yeah, I think if you've got the time and patience and you like things that look really good, intelligent television, this is one for you. Yeah. Where is it available? Tell us, Jo, because I'm useless. Oh, it's on Apple TV, isn't it? Oh yeah, Apple TV.

I'm sure it's Apple TV. It's got loads of really good stuff on it. I've got a few, like Slow Burners now. I've got Severance. I've got Slow Horses. They're doing another series of Black Doves, but that was on Netflix. There's quite a lot of good stuff at the moment, isn't there? Yeah.

Bringing it back to Black Doves, I just basically want to have Ben Whishaw as my best friend. And I just want him to call me love and darling all the time and just basically look after me. I need to watch this, don't I, Jo? Yeah, he's so lovely. Ben Whishaw is fab in it. And also Keira Knightley is brilliant.

I'm up for it. Could you please now, that means you're going to have more time on your hands, don't start going forward to another programme because I'm going to watch, but I'm always going to be one series behind you you are you are

as it stands and we are going to have to have some more recommendations from our listeners definitely because I'm coming up to the end of all of the stuff that I've got my eye on

yeah okay so yeah we're going to need some more recommendations yeah we need more oh my god did you oh and I would like to say did I say this last week

I can't remember but I am a fully fledged Michael McIntyre huge fan. Love him. I'm so pleased. Did you see Sam Thompson

and Zara McDermott this week? Oh my God. Yeah, that wasn't this week, was it? That was the week before. Oh yeah, do you know why? I watched two this week. We watched two because we was out the week before. The kids now are quoting constantly. Have you had some Gaviscon and a fart?

You've had a fart and a Gaviscon. Oh, my God. Sam Thompson. For starters, they'd locked themselves in. Absolutely brilliant. And then he made her open the door. She had to open the door. And then when he kept going, I'm going to be sick.

I think I'm going to be sick. Bless him. Oh, my God, we were roaring. It is brilliant. We sat down to watch it. And I had no idea that it was a show like this. I didn't really kind of know what the show was. It is flipping brilliant.

Wasn't Marty Pellow amazing? Marty Pellow was brilliant. Wasn't he so lovely as well? Because he's secretly being filmed there. And I always think you can tell if someone's nice or not. And he congratulated the couple next to him. And I thought, he's a really nice bloke. He is.

And when he tried Jamie Oliver's stuff and the food, and he was kind of like, oh, Monster Munch. Well, you know, and he went with it. And he was really nice, wasn't he? He was really lovely. Yeah. And what about the lovely man? What was his name?

The older man? Whose wife had dementia and he went and sang in the hospital. Yes. Yes. Wasn't that beautiful? And how they had to kind of warn him beforehand so not to shock him so much when the wall came down. Oh, and it made me laugh because I thought, oh, my God, he's like my father. Because he was chatting away and he wasn't listening and he was adamant he wasn't going to have that backpack thing. He reminded me of

my dad very much so, God rest his soul. But it really did. It really reminds me. Oh, it was brilliant. So lovely. Michael McIntyre's big show. What about the woman who's obsessed with all he mer's? Absolutely brilliant.

Oh my God. I was roaring out loud. Oh my God, did you see when she kept turning to her husband and going, oh my God, that, my God. I was roaring out loud. Oh, my God. Did you see when she kept turning to her husband and going, oh, my God, that's my grandfather. That's my God. That's our street. And then how she was still in the world when she was like,

that's our house. And then the door goes and she stands up and she sort of does her dressing gown and she's like, I'm watching you. And she was in the world. Oh, God, it was amazing. Really good. It's brilliant, isn't it? Every segment's really good.

It's good old-fashioned Saturday night telly. Loved it. I tell you what, right. Well, I wish I'd watched it earlier. We are going back now. The kids are obsessed with Michael McIntyre. We've now watched a couple of his stand-up shows. They keep quoting things all the time that he said,

and he is absolutely hilarious. Well, there you go. See? I told you you'd get on with it i told you you'd like it oh my god did you see when he was doing oh no this might have been a previous one when he was doing karaoke um with chic the band this is an old one yeah honestly all of it i've seen them all i think they're all brilliant so good so yeah on the on on the subject of saturday night telly yes gladiators i have now extended my obsession i love legend but i now On the subject of Saturday Night Tele. Yes. Gladiators.

I have now extended my obsession. I love Legend, but I now love Apollo as well. I love them both the same. I think they're amazing. They are just brilliant. Well, what about the contestant who knocked Legend off? Oh, no, he didn't knock him off. He stayed up.

He did. He stayed up. He was very, very strong, that guy. He was, wasn't he? Didn't Legend fall off? I think Legend. He didn't. He did. He stayed up. He was very, very strong, that guy. He was, wasn't he? Didn't Ledren fall off? I think Ledren. He didn't. He didn't fall off.

No, but they stayed on the podium. But he was so big. Oh, my God, yeah. And this guy, he owned a CrossFit, didn't he? Yes. He did the CrossFit gym or whatever. Yeah. And I did think, oh, he looks quite strong, but he's smaller.

I don't think this is going to work. He did really well, didn't he? Oh, my God. So well. So well. And then at the end, I think I thought that he was going to win the Eliminator, but he didn't. The other fella with the beard ended up winning, didn't he?

Absolutely. Yeah, yeah. Oh my God, it was so good. I'm loving it. I'm absolutely loving Gladiators. It is brilliant. You can't beat it. I have to say, like, Joni got into bed with me

and we watched a bit of it on Sunday morning. Yeah. Joni really enjoys it. It's gone past Eliza now. She's 14. Has it? Really? She's 14.

Oh, is she not into it anymore? No. Only the kind of raised eyebrow at Nitro. Oh my God. But you know, not really. Do you know what I dreamt the other day? I dreamt that I was about to do a TV show and Nitro, who's out now, isn't he? Because of his bad knee.

Yeah. Nitro was going to be working with me on it and he was looking after me. And I woke up and I wasn't sure and I'm still not sure, right, if this is real life or if it was a dream. Because I've got so many emails I need to check. I'm still not 100% sure

if it's an email that I read last week and me and Nitro are actually working together and he's training me or looking after me or something. I don't even know. Was it Nitro in Strictly Come Dancing? It was, wasn't it? Yes, it was. I'm not going crazy, am I, with Josh Whittacombe?

It was that series. Yes, it was. Oh, my God, did you see Legend doing the wall thing, climbing and climbing up past the contestant and climbing over the top? No. and climbing up past the contestant and climbing over the top and not even stopping the contestant. He went past him and he climbed up and he didn't even bother to pull him down. No, but he's an arsehole, isn't he?

I know, but I love how arrogant he is. I hate it. I don't like arrogant people. No, I don't like him at all. What do you think of the new gladiator, the new girl? Was she called Storm? Cyclone, she's called. Have I missed some of it? It was definitely on in the bedroom. Maybe I went for a wee, got a cup of tea. I've just missed bits, obviously. Well, she's brand new and she's like Viper.

She's like the female version of Viper. Oh, yeah. And she's like full on giving it to the contestants and being like, you cheated, try and do whatever. And she's like full on in their face and she doesn't take any nonsense. I was scared. You're very good with the names of the gladiators. I'm not very good.

What is the name of the six foot blonde woman? She's six foot blonde and she has a plait. Diamond and she does that. Yeah, diamond. Yeah. When she lost, because she fell off and she was on the net or whatever and she fell off of one of them. She was so lovely.

Yes. She was really, really nice to the contestant. I prefer her. Yeah. Did you see Rob Beckett and Joel Dommett? It's quite a mouthful, that. It's like a tongue twister. Rob Beckett and Joel Dommett at Christmas.

Yes, it was incredible. I mean, love him to bits. They came out and you go, oh, no, he's going to win this. It was amazing. I loved, love him to bits. I came out and you go, oh, no, he's going to win this. It was amazing. I loved it. I loved it. I loved it. What I love is Rob really only did it for his kids because his kids absolutely love it.

And I think, good on you. And you did so well as well. He's very fit. Very fit. He was so fit. He's strong. He's fit. He was really, really good.

Brilliant. Really good. And what did he say his name was going to be? What was his name now? The Beaver. Beaver. Because he kept doing that. Didn't he?

The Beaver. The kids loved it. Absolutely loved it. Do you know his name wasn't going to be the Beaver? What was it going to be? Well, he had a whole thing all set up and it just came out in the end and he went, nah, they're never going to know what it is. I'll just be a Beaver.

Oh my God. Yeah. But yeah, it was brilliant. Yeah. Oh, fantastic. Oh, my God. And Joel Dormett, he was really fit, wasn't he? But I can't believe it.

The gladiators didn't hold back. I mean, my God, they were slamming into them, weren't they? I know you do think, don't you? It is a Christmas special. Chill out, guys. Yeah. They don't care, do they? That would be you.

Yeah. This is for charity. Chill out, guys. Yeah. They don't care, do they? That would be you. Yeah. This is for charity. Fuck off. Bang. Bang. It's for the children. Bang. Go away.

Bang. That would be you. Can you imagine being there, right? And ready to go and ready to run. And you've got, like, you know, the massive, you've got giant coming out. You've got legend. You've got to put all these, like, six foot, five inch fellers coming out. You wouldn't have a hope in hell, would you?

Not a hope. Just be like flipping heck. Loved it though. Loved that Christmas time. I'd bang them some money if I was on it. Would you? Yeah. I'd say, Diamond, Diamond, come here, innit?

I'd say, there's a hundred quid. Just do us a favour. Make me look good. I'd cover myself in, what's it called? Nutella? No, body lotion. Because Diamond was saying about one of the girls this week when she was climbing up the wall

that she managed to grab her and pull her down because she hadn't put lotion all over her legs because what they normally do, apparently, the contestants, is cover themselves in lotion and then they can't get them. So you can't grab? Yeah. Very good. That's what I do.

I would cover myself from head to foot in it. I'm sure some people will appreciate that comment. If you were a gladiator, what would your name be? What would your name be? The trumpeter. I think I'd have to be dragon. I'd be like that. Dragon.

Oh, don't. So you think for next week we should do Black Doves? Oh, let's do Black Doves. It's brilliant. Okay. And also, I kind of basically want Keira Knightley's wardrobe and London house. Do you like her hair?

And I want to be a spy. Oh, her hair is amazing in it. And I also want Ben Whishaw to be my best friend and call me love. It's fab. I loved it. You've said that four times now.

Are you sure you want Ben Whishaw as your best friend? I want to have a best friend like Ben Whishaw and I want him to call me love. Okay, fine. He's so good in it. So good in it.

Alright, I'm going to watch it. Brilliant. Brilliant, yeah. Well, we've been asking for your recommendations love okay he's so good in it so good in it all right i'm gonna watch it you've brilliant brilliant yeah well we've been asking for your recommendations because we're desperate for one and i think we've got one here joe let fingers crossed it's good let's have a listen hi joe and that hope you're both well it's laura from essex just giving you a quick voice note to recommend something to watch which is Pete Wicks for Dogs Sake on UNW basically he's based at the Dogs Trust um caring for all the dogs and puppies and everything that they get um sent in there's dogs that are underweight, dogs with serious illness, etc. There's four episodes and you can watch it on the You app on the catch up as well.

Thank you. I mean, Pete Wicks for you. You love a bit of Pete Wicks. I love a bit of Pete Wicks. And I will sit and watch dogs all day long. So happy days. Yeah. And put them two together.

I mean, Pete Wicks just fawning over dogs and just looking after them and loving them. That would be beautiful. Well, let's do that. That's comforting, isn't it? And if we've got dramas to watch and all of that, that squeezes right in. Comedy, drama, comfort watch. Yes, I think that sounds lovely.

This is why we need your recommendations. Thank you so much. We do, we do. Well, please can you WhatsApp us on 030306784704 with your recommendations and all your lovely messages for us. Also, we have a call out for your favourite TV chefs and cooking shows. We're dropping a bonus episode this Friday, so please keep an eye out for that. I'm still recovering from our last episode

when we were chatting with Paul Gorton. I mean, it's the only time really that I've been chatting to the mums at the school gates and saying, oh my God, I was talking to Paul Gorton and I love him, he's amazing. Were you showing off about that at the school gate? Yeah, he's the only one I've ever showed off about. Only one.

Not to David? No, no, Paul Gorton. I was just like, oh my God, I think he's amazing. And also it's kind of like he's some hyper villain from like James Bond or something because he's so incredibly well-groomed. He's so tall. He's so well-groomed.

He's so sharp and slick. And then he's got this amazing charisma. I remember watching The Traitors and going, oh my God, how can they not tell? But when you are in a room with him, he's just got this ability to make you like him. And he's so funny. That is true. He is very, very likeable.

He should be a Bond villain. He's fab. I love him. I don't know if he can act very well, though. Oh, he can act. Well, yeah. No, I suppose so. Yeah.

He'd have to improvise as the Bond villain. It's just quite a large jump, isn't it, from traitors to Bond? But do you know what? Anything goes these days. Wouldn't surprise me. Anything goes. Jo, have a lovely few days. You too.

Have a nice time. Love you, darling. I'll see you soon. Bye. See you, everyone. Bye, everyone. Off the Telly is hosted by Natalie Cassidy and Joanna Page. The producer is Georgia Keating.

The commissioning editor is Rhian Roberts and it's a BBC Studios audio production for BBC Sounds. Strong message here from BBC Radio 4. I'm Amanda Unucci. And I'm Helen Lewis. A comedy writer and a journalist Thank you. Finding out what they really mean. And looking at whether they're meant to deceive us. Or to distract us. Or to disturb us. And our pledge is to help you spot the tricks of the verbal trait. But be warned, this series does feature strong political language that some listeners may find an inverted pyramid of piffle. Strong message here from BBC Radio 4. Listen now on BBC Sounds.