Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Brianna LaPaglia | 2025 Unpacked: Self-Discovery, Special Forces, & Life After The BFFs Pod Ending!

Episode Date: December 30, 2025

#906. Brianna LaPaglia is back on the pod — and 2025 treated her like the full-on rollercoaster it was. In this episode, she’s spilling everything: the fear, the growth, the career pivots, the solo adventures, and all the stuff she’s never had the chance to fully explain. We talk the iconic Tarte Turks & Caicos trip, surviving Special Forces (and yes, the pain, sweat, and chaos that came with it), saying goodbye to BFFs and saying hello again to PlanBri Uncut, learning to be alone for the first time in forever, and the kind of self-discovery that hits differently when you’ve been through a lot. Plus, she’s giving us the real talk on dating, life lessons, and what she’s bringing into 2026! Real, funny, and totally the Brianna Chickenfry we all know and love— this episode is a vibe you don’t want to miss!If you’re LOVING this podcast, please follow and leave a rating and review below! PLUS, FOLLOW OUR PODCAST INSTAGRAM HERE!Thank you to our Sponsors! Check out these deals!Boulevard: Visit JOINBLVD.com & book a demo to see if it’s right for your business! Boulevard is also offering new customers 20% off your first year subscription!Pura: Right now, get yours free when you subscribe to two scents for 12 months. Don’t wait—this limited-time offer won’t last. Try it risk-free for 30 days now at pura.com.Quince: Go to Quince.com/vine for free shipping on your order & 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too!EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: (2:52) — Brianna shares all the tea from her iconic Tarte Turks & Caicos trip!(10:55) — Opening up about her lowest point in early 2025 and how she fought her way back from feeling like a shell of herself(29:16) — Saying goodbye to the BFFs pod with Dave & Josh and stepping into a new chapter(43:15) — Looking ahead to 2026: a major life move, big changes, and a whole new chapter (tune in for the location!)See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This episode of Off the Vine is brought to you by Boulevard. Visit Boulevard and book a demo to see if it's right for your business. And for a limited time, Boulevard is offering new customers 20% off your first year subscription. That's J-O-I-N-B-L-V-D.com to learn more. Pura, right now get yours free when you subscribe to two cents for 12 months. Don't wait because this limited time offer will not last. Try at risk-free for 30 days now at pura.com. And quince.

Go to quince. dot com slash vine for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in Canada too. You're listening to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Hey, Vino's real quick, if you are listening right now, which obviously you are or you wouldn't be hearing this, can you hit the subscribe or follow button on whatever platform you're on? Please, that one simple thing helps more than you even realize it allows me to keep growing on this podcast and making these episodes the best they can possibly be obviously for you. That's the only favorite I'm going to ever ask. Okay. It truly means the world to me. Thank you. Now let's get into it.

Hey, everybody. Welcome to Off the Vine. I'm going to start saying it with a question mark. I'm Caitlin Bristow. Am I? You tell me. We have Brianna chicken fry in the studio today, which I don't think she can go by anything else but that name. That's just how we know her now. She's obviously a creator, a podcaster, barstool personality who has lived, I would say, 10 different lifetimes in the past year alone. Since we had her on last, she's obviously gone through a public breakup, which she is very over talking about, which I do not blame her for, a complete career reset, competed on special forces, ended a podcast. She's just rebranding all over the place and rebuilding her sense of safety, trust, and identity in real time, online, and on this podcast. So conversation is not a recap of old lore. It's just kind of about what actually has happened this year, where she's at now, which she's learned along the way, fear, growth, dating, career pivots, all the things that she's never got to fully explain maybe in one podcast.

but we did it we did it baby I want to know if you are so sick of talking about your past relationship oh my god yes obviously like like shut up not you but like just like shut up and people like she doesn't stop talking about it I'm like because I keep getting asked about it so I was thinking about this because I mean still to this day I get asked about Sean Booth from like 10 years ago because it was you know I was engaged on the bachelorette from it and I went through so many phases of being like just dragging him into being like you know what I'm over it into like yeah now I have like now I look back with fond memories into like wow we're still talking about this yeah but I'm like but people get so mad at me and they would be like stop talking about him or like get over it and

I'm like but I'm going on podcast and they're asking about it and I want so I was like I'm gonna of course I have a couple questions in here of course but I'm like I just want to know how annoying it is because, just because of other people being like, well, stop talking about it, but you're like, I keep getting asked about it and everything I do. What are you supposed to do? Say, I'm not answering that. And then I don't want to be rude to people. And also, I understand it was a super public relationship.

It was a super public breakup. And what I do enjoy talking about it and why I shared it and why I made it so public is to help women if they were going through the same thing. If they're struggling with abuse and like how to come out of that. Yeah. But I'm so over like talking about hand. Like I don't even say his name. Yeah, no. I would either.

Oh my gosh. Yeah. I don't even want to say my ex's name. I can't imagine someone that was like that big of a monster. Exactly. But I want to talk about first and foremost, this tart trip that you just went on. Because there's one part of me gets jealous and I go, why don't I get invited on tart trips? And then the other part of me goes, I don't think I want to go on these tart trips.

That looks like I don't know if I can hang anymore. No, it's a lot. It is a lot. Like I got back last night, I still feel like I'm floating right now. Yeah. Like I'm just, my body's so dead in Turks and Caicos at Princes. at Prince's old house. Stop it.

Amazing. There's a purple driveway. Well, Prince's old estate. Like, it's insane. Crazy. It has a purple driveway? Purple driveway, like bright purple. Did he do that?

Yeah. Oh, cool. It wasn't not for Tart. Okay, good. I was going to be like, no. Wow. Yeah, incredible. What kind of budget does Tart have?

Well, that's the thing people always ask. So they spend no money on marketing or like advertisements. So you won't see any billboards. You won't see any paid advertisements from them. This is strictly where. most of their budget goes. And at the end of the day, people are like, I don't know if it works, if it's stupid. Everyone talks about it after.

Everyone. Everyone. I see the internet goes nuts about the tart trips. Yes. And sometimes I'm like, people get angry about the tart trips. Why are they so mad? So mad. I think, I mean, you have to think just subconsciously it's because they want to be on it?

Yeah, I used to get mad too and be like, it's just so stupid. Yeah. But like I get it. Also, it is just like a bunch of wealth in your face. But what do you want the influencers to do? that get invited. You want them to not enjoy it or post about it, then it would be like, what the hell are you doing? It's always one of those catch-22 situations in any influencer world. Yeah, every time.

There's so many times where it feels like out of touch, but then also you're like, but you're only saying that, but if you were invited, you would do the same thing. I know. And I do. It is such a weird spot to be in as an influencer because, yeah, you get to a point where you kind of are out of touch, where you're going on these trips and your life turns into just something that you never expected. And it's like, damn, maybe we are out of touch with reality, but this is our reality. So I don't know. I feel weird.

I get that. I get that because there are times where something really cool could happen and I'm almost numb to it. And then I feel like an asshole because I'm like, why am I not feeling more grateful for something that's so once in a lifetime? And I like almost complain about it. And then I have to check myself. It's a whole thing.

Right. Yeah. It's like a mind. And I don't know how to deal with it. But it was fun. It was so fun. It was so fun. I got stitches on the first night of the trip.

How did I miss that? Literally so stupid. It wasn't, like, I wasn't even drunk yet. They had this sign and everyone's like, sue them. I'm like, sue myself. Like, it's my fault. But there was a sign on the beach where it's made out of like old, it's like a mosaic out of glass.

And me and Dylan were doing like, you know the trick from dancing with the stars where you do like the cartwheels together. Yes. We were doing that. Oh my gosh. Dylan Ephron? No. Oh, my gosh.

I was like amazing. I wish. Yeah. No, Dylan, do you know, have you seen shut the fuck up and fuck me guy? No. Okay, he's blowing up in New York City. He's amazing. I love him.

But we were doing that. And then I fell backwards. Didn't even hit the sign. But I stood up and a piece of like glass was hanging out. And my whole arm ripped open. But I didn't even feel it. I was like, Dylan, get up. We're going to get this done.

He's like, Briah, I have to tell you something. Your whole arm is wide open right now. I was like, no. But then, yeah, we got touches and it was fine. I just wish it happened on the last night. I mean, are you okay? I'm totally fine. I get hurt.

I'm like prone to getting hurt. You're one of those? Like, I guess so. On the last heart trip, I like fell off a golf car. It was a nightmare. What the? I know. Yeah, sue them.

That's funny. You're like, mm. I'm like, this is my fault. Yeah, that seems like a me problem. Yeah. My best friend in Nashville, she facetimes me the other day. And I'm laying in bed and I pick up the face time and she goes, can you take me to the hospital right now?

And I went, what happened? And she goes, I sliced my finger like wide open. Like, there's bone. Oh, my God. And I was like, why am I your emergency contact? I like don't do well with blood and all of that. And so I immediately go pick her up because her husband was on his way home. She had something on the oven. So he needed to stay with the kids and the oven. And I took her to the hospital. And she's such a

badass. She used to be, she used to work in the ER at that hospital that we went to. Yeah. So she's not phased. I'm sitting there going white while I'm driving. She's like, do you want me to drive? And there's like blood everywhere. That was like, yeah. And I was freaking out. And then we got to the hospital and she's sitting there and people are recognizing her like, oh, I used to work here. And she's like, hey, you're still here.

And I'm going like, do you guys have Xanax or like something else? And I was such a, but I turned the beat around and I was like, stop being a little bitch, Caitlin. Your friend is, she needs you right now. And so I exposure therapy. I said, show me the cut. And so she did. And I was like, and then I watched them stitch it up.

Oh my God. So yeah, exposure therapy. And then I was fine. Yeah. That was everyone on the tart trip. I was calming everyone else down. And I was like, no, guys, it's fine. This is fine. They like put a needle that big into the cut. And I was like, no, guys, I swear I'm fine. They're all like turning white. Wait, where did everyone come to the hospital on the tart trip? The doctor came to the house. Nice. Was nice. Oh, okay. So everyone's just, everyone's just like watching me get my stitches. Is this going viral on the internet? Yeah, I did go viral. I posted about it. Yeah. I don't know. I'll have to show you. I won't show you the cut. I don't know. You can. I'm good now. You're good now. Yeah. Do you want to see what it looked like? Yeah, I do.

actually. No, like the internet wants me to show them, but I can't really post it. My like guts are hanging out of my arm. Holy! Yeah, gross, right? And they had to do like three layers or like double layers of stitches. Oh, that's bad. But they had to do a bunch of layers.

Are you worried about like, is there like muscle tissue damage or you're good? I feel fine. Okay. Because the cat, so she had, I think six stitches just like along here. But the lady was like, yeah, you're good. And then one of our friends, her dad is a retired hand doctor. And he's like, I don't. I would actually look into this. I think you might need surgery.

Oh, no. Two days later, she has to go fully under and get surgery because the doctor said her tendon was just hanging like a wet noodle, like not attached. Ew. See, that's gross. Oh, my God. So she was like, yeah. Wait, I hope that. Yeah, I think I'm fine. Like, I have good movement. You would, I think you would know. I would know. Also, I don't think there's like tendons.

Don't ask me. I'm like, in your fat pockets. So I'm like, at least it's back there. And then the rest of the trip was fire. Was there anything that happened that you're like, that was highlights, low, highs and lows, what was the best part of the trip? There were no, there was obviously drama. This was like insane, yeah, but there was no, there was no drama on the trip. Everyone was friendly. It was great. It was really fun.

Oh, that's nice. It's usually drama. Three. Because I saw, I don't know if it was alive or if you, it was just a post of you and Hallie. Oh, yeah. Well, there was one thing. So everyone was asking like, what was the drama, what was the D? And there was one person who was someone's plus one who was a nightmare.

But it was nobody that, like, no influencer, it was just somebody's plus one. And they were, like, really rude. They were talking shit about their, the person that brought them there every time that they left the room, they would talk about them. And we're like, what is going on? Where does your loyalty lie? Yeah. It was so crazy.

That makes me uncomfortable. Did anyone say anything? Were you like, um? Yeah, well, she could tell we were very standoffish and like she would wake up in the mornings and we like, couldn't make eye contact with anyone. I think she was just like a mean drunk or something. Oh, oof. Do you have an angry alcohol?

No, I'm just very fun and happy and like, like jumping off of roofs and breaking my arm. Sounds like a good time. I'm dangerous towards myself only, though. I was thinking about like 2020, because we're going into 2026, which is crazy. But when 2025 started, how crazy your life, like how different your life is from the start to finish. I always reflect back on my like year of where I started at 2025 and where I am. And I'm like, this year was like pretty chill for me. And they say it's the year of the snake and that you're shedding and then the year of the horse is coming and we're all going to be like going after our dreams.

But I feel like you really shed some shit. Yeah, for sure. Like I look at myself, I compare myself a lot to last year. It's only been one year since everything has happened. Has it only been one year? It's only been one year, which is crazy. And I look at like the spot I was in mentally at the beginning of 2025 and then the spot I'm in now. And when you're so, you're just in a really dark place, you never think you're going to.

come out of it and it feels like it's permanent and I just really try to relay that message to everyone that listens to me. It's like I thought it was the end of my f***ing life. I was so depressed. I was so I was a shell of a human. I was like 15 pounds lighter, 25 pounds lighter. And now I feel like a person again. So it's crazy to look back, but it feels like 30 years ago. Yeah, even though you're probably hung over and tired, like I feel like you have life back. Yeah. Yeah. It's really crazy because obviously I follow you and I see this journey that you. been on. And I remember just wanting to like jump through the phone and give you a hug so many times because you were so vulnerable with everybody. And that comes with being polarizing,

which is so strange to me that when you share just like the struggles and ups and downs, people want this like open and honesty from people on the internet and then you give it to them and they call you names and then all of a sudden you're controversial and like polarizing and people have so many opinions. And then if you hit it all, you're like, but that's the message I'm trying to relay is like stand up for yourself, show the ups and downs that you can go through being a shell of yourself at the beginning of the year and then be fully brought back to life by the end of it. Like you're showing everybody what they're capable of. Yeah. Well, that's the weird part about the internet. And it's obviously not everyone, but it's the majority of people

that take it in and comment on stuff. It's a lot. They want, they want someone to be open or vulnerable or relatable and normal. But then the second people actually are, that's the last thing they want. They want someone that is like a cookie cutter, perfect image of something that they'll never be. No one ever is. And those people that are pretending to be online aren't even that. They're all frauds. Yeah. I mean, like to an extent, like they're just showing a curated version and pretending that they're like relatable and vulnerable. But it's like I know all their PR people. I know all the behind the scenes in every single thing they do is calculated. And I'm like, maybe I should have done that. No. That's, I know a few people like that. And I've heard of a few

people like that and it seems so exhausting to be that like and and then there's somebody that's always like they're always the hero in their story and saving something or doing something great and look at me and all the and I'm like you set up a tripod to which which I get that you have to make your money and I obviously do content and stuff like that but I just I like when people show up like you do on the internet where it's just like love me or hate me this is who I am and I'm going to continue to do it and it's your journey. I agree. I appreciate that and I appreciate people like that. Those are people I enjoy to watch because they're the same people behind a closed door, you know. Exactly. It's just I happen to like, and I myself am messy. I don't think that's bad.

I don't think it's bad. I think it's human. I think it's so human and it's nobody's showing, not a lot of people are showing messy on the internet and I would like more of it. I agree. And if you don't have to be bad, you don't need to be bad or mean person to be messy. Just be normal, like be a human. Yeah. Have emotions. Well, it's just, yeah, it really makes me feel, following you makes me feel, like, better about, not, not because I'm like, oh, look at her, I feel better about myself. It makes me feel like I'm showing up the way I want to show up. Yeah, I love that. And that I'm, like, inspired by it because I go, I really don't care.

I go back and forth. But for the majority, I really don't care if random people hate me. Me either. Yeah. It's never, it's never in real life. Right. It's never in real life. I've never met a main person in real life.

Right. Wow. Does it scare you to ever, like, go to. the airport or have people come up to you on the street and you are so kind to them and they could have been so mean to you on the internet i think about it a lot i'm like i'm sure that we've came like we've came in contact with so many of our haters yes we had to have not scary yeah it's crazy it like freaks me out of it makes me like get the hebi jibis because i'm like i'm obviously going to be so nice nice people coming up to me yeah and then now i'm scared like one of them's a

serial killer like the world is so scary right now dude i'm like someone's gonna kill me that's all I actually care about you. Be as mean as you want, but don't kill me. Please don't kill me. I was thinking that even this morning I woke up and of course I go to social media and I'm like, I'm scared to walk out the front door right now. Yeah. Like there was a loose gunman yesterday in New York City. Oh my, really? Yes. Jesus. I didn't leave my house yesterday. Good. I did and I was scared. And I was talking to one of my friends and he's like, you just can't live your life like that. I'm like, what? People are dying. Like actually. It's so scary. And like, getting, and mental illness is at an all-time high.

It's crazy. And everyone has access to, we're easily, easily trackable. It's so, yeah. Yeah, like, I don't post it in real time anymore. That's actually so smart. Yeah. I should, I used to not, and now I probably do all the time, but that's, that's actually so smart because people can even figure out, like, from one tree of where you are, like,

where. Literally. Yeah. It's crazy. They're psychotic. The crazy ones are psychotic. So I can only, like, I'll post, like, in a car, but I, I won't post where I am until the next day.

Yeah. Yeah. I always, I'm jumping all over the place, but I always talk about the benefit of hindsight and like looking back on like the year, looking back on, in 2024, do you feel like there were so many signs of what 2025 was going to look like that you were just avoiding? Yeah. And how do you do, like for somebody listening right now that is stuck, what signs or what things do you, are you like, get out now or do this now?

I have advice for you. Well, yeah, I think as women, we always know how it's going to end. We always know where it's going. But when you're a woman, you love and you love hard and you're very forgiving. And I think when it comes down to a point where there's always an apology, you're waking up and it's like nothing ever happened or they're just completely gaslighting you or completely just steamrolling you into making you feel like everything is your fault. You're not allowed to have feelings or you end up apologizing for something that they did. When that happens, I mean, more than one time, it's never going to stop happening. And I mean, just the control factor. And when you start getting isolated from your friends and your family, your town,

when you're made small, but you're made to feel so big in their life, but then you don't have a life of your own. It's like, oh, this is a, yeah, this is a control game and this isn't going to end well. But then you do, you get stuck. Like anyone that has been through like a narcissistic abusive relationship and is out of it knows exactly what I'm talking about. I don't know if you've experienced it, but not to that level. Yeah, when you're stuck in it, you really are stuck in it because you don't even know who you are anymore. Yeah. And it's just you're living to please this person so that you can get like feel some sort of comfort in your life again. So I think just like the isolation and the, it's very scary. But when you know, you know. If you look back on all,

this is a random comparison, but bachelorets, a big percentage of bachelorets give their first impression rose to the guy they pick at the end because they just know. Yeah. And that goes for good and bad. You just, there is something so powerful about that intuition. And a lot of times we ignore it. Yeah, we ignore it because we try to see the good.

And we think, and then a lot of the times you feel like you're self-sabotaging. You're like, wait, maybe this could be great. Maybe I am being like self-destructive right now and trying to put up wall. But usually it's for a good goddamn reason. Like now I know I'm not, I haven't dated since and I'm like really trying to be emotionally available because I don't want to be the person that does have a good person come into my life, but I'm so traumatized that I push them away. So I'm trying to get to a place where I'm really comfortable in knowing what I want and what I need instead of opening up the doors to hurting someone. I don't want to hurt anyone in the

ways that like I was hurt. Exactly. Now how do you do that? How what what do you do in your life to help you become more emotionally available and like learn and grow from all of this so that you can go into another relationship like of course dating is doing whatever is fun please do all of that but yeah what are you doing for you to make yourself available for an I think the most important like task for me was to truly focus on myself and that sounds so cliche but I mean to actually just be alone I was a relationship girly so I was in a relationship from 16 to I think, like, I was never not in a relationship. This is the longest I've been single in my whole life.

So I think that in itself was probably a problem for me. I didn't really know how to be alone. So I really wanted to work on that, know what I needed because my other past relationships, they were with great men, but I would fail them because I just, like, I didn't even know what I wanted. And then I was a shitty girlfriend. And then I get into this relationship where then like, oh, I'm getting shit on. So I was like, you know what, be alone.

Focus on yourself. Alone is awesome. Focus on your career. And be with friends. I think I just, you really need to prioritize friendships and how important they are. Yes. Because when you're in a relationship, they take a back burner. Well, and also people focus so much on they need love from a partner when they could be focusing

on all the love they have around them and every other aspect of life. Animals, from friends, from family, from, you know, like there's so much, there's so many people out there that love you. It doesn't have to be coming from the person that you're with. No. Like a sense of self can really come from platonial. relationships. And like romantic relationships, of course, are important. Yeah. But they're not the end-all be-all. If you don't have platonic relationships, then you're just, you're like walking around

with one person. Yeah. You need to fill your pot. I almost love being alone too much. Me too. Now I'm like loving it. Yeah. To the point where like long distance relationships to me sound ideal. That's what people are telling me to do. Yeah. I just, I'm like, I mean, for a certain period of time, sure. Like, it's just so fun. Yeah. Okay. If you guys are running a self-care business then you already know this it's not just about the service it's about the experience from the moment someone books to the moment they walk out the door every detail matters and that is exactly why i want to tell you about boulevard so boulevard is the fastest growing client experience platform built specifically for appointment-based self-care business think like salon spas barbershops med spas and more and because these

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30 Days Now at Pura.com. Through everything that you have been through, and you come out the other side, the other side. I do that all the time on my podcast where like, stop talking. I'm just like, just take a beat, Caitlin, and pop it out. But there was, I feel like there was humor that came out of it. There was chaos. There was distracts.

Like, I feel like you were processing a lot while there was so many. other things happening. I like genuinely, I think it fucked me up so bad because I didn't actually have time to process anything that was going on because it was a one, it was so public. I was like had to record a podcast the next day when I feel like I wasn't ready, didn't want to, had to do that. Then like there was just a shit storm of so many things going on that I didn't even get to process what the fuck I just went through and how traumatic it was. And then I go on special forces and I feel like that's when I really let all my walls down and I like broke down on the show. Oh, I bet it changed your life. Changed my life in so many ways. And I think like I had a

breakdown on there because I never truly like actually went through or felt my emotions because I had to deal with everything publicly instead of them with myself. Yeah. It was insane. That makes so much sense. So I feel like that show is probably what you tell me, but like such a blessing for you to process those emotions because nobody could go, well, except for Sean Johnson, nobody could go through that show without breaking down. Did she break down? She broke down after the Tunnel Challenge. Oh, right, right, right, yes.

But, I mean, barely. Yeah, barely. She's not real. She's not real. You are a superwoman. It really, yeah. She's incredible. What did you find the hardest part of that show?

I mean, truly for me, it was the physicality of it. I didn't work out before the show. and they didn't put a lot of the shit. You didn't work out? No. They didn't put a lot of the shit in where they would like torture us where we would have to run for three miles with chains on us or then like run up these mountains, condition us, but they don't put it in.

So I, what it taught me, though, was how mentally strong I am. And I'm like really grateful for that show. And also showed me how physically weak I am. Like, I really need to work out some more. That's crazy. Yeah, it was a whirlwind of a show. I mean, you did so well. Thank you.

Yeah. I mean, I tried my best. Yes. I mean, that's the show I always say I could never do. I just, the bathroom situation for me is a no. I mean, horrific. Horrific, but you just have to get over it. And then it's like, oh, we're all shooting and making eye contact outside together as a family. It's bizarre. That would freak me out. Do they give you like ear plugs? No. But this guy, Ravi, he brought, he was on the show, he brought like a box of ear plugs. Thank God, because everyone was snoring in the barracks. Oh, that would drive me nuts.

Yeah. So with misophonia, part of what triggers my mind. misophonia is snoring. Yeah. Wait, what's misophonia? It's a disease that causes rage within my body. I can't handle people chewing. Oh, okay. All right. Drinking noises, chewing noises. Even sirens in the city like really overstimulates you. Yes. Yeah. To the point where I'm like, why do I feel rage in my body? That's a nightmare. And snoring does that to me. So your plugs would be necessary. Necessarity. Yeah, absolutely. I feel like I'm mentally strong until it's something with a sound or poop. Okay, fair.

Yeah, those two things, or throw up. Okay, so there's a couple. There's like a list. It's all the gross stuff. All the gross stuff, but I also don't think I could do underwater or claustrophobic stuff. The tunnels ruined me, ruined me. Like, I had a full bone. I couldn't use my elevator for a week after.

I would take the stairs because I was so worried that it was going to get stuck and I was I didn't like know that I could really experience. I didn't know I had claustophobia until I went on the show. Yeah. Like, I assumed I did. But then I, like, everyone else was kind of doing it. And I, like, my head full body shakes. It was so bad.

It was sobbing. It was awful. Well, because, and I always think, because everyone's like, well, they pay you. And I go, okay, but I couldn't go. I always say, okay, I would just go and leave day one. But I know I can't. But I couldn't. I'm too competitive.

That's how I am. So once I get there, I'm in it. I was like, I can't leave. I can't be a loser. And then it's like, once you got through the day, you were actually so proud of yourself. You're like, okay, maybe I could do another day. And then you'd wake up again and be like, let's just make it to the night and see if we could keep going, keep going. And I had Gia, Judei, too. We became really close on the show. Thank God for her. Because we were both kind of

struggling the same amounts. And everyone else, towards the end was like Sean Johnson. So if it was just me and Sean Johnson, I'd be like, what am I doing here? Like, she's a beast and I can't. But me and and Gia were on the same level. It was really good to have her. I was going to ask who you bonded with, but that makes sense. I feel like we saw a soft side of you on that show, like a girl's girl's soft side. Yeah. Did you get good response from people after that, like, show? Yeah, I think this show is great because, I mean, reality TV is just who you are. Right. So it was nice. And it, I mean, I got into a lot of fights with Cody Brown. Yeah. And I tried to take care of Gio or like protect Sean when Cody was

mean to her. And yeah, I think it just genuinely showed who I was, which was really good. Who is that Cody? Who's Cody? Where is he from? He's a sister-wise. I didn't know who he was before. Sister wives? Yeah, I don't have cable, so he is a TLC guy. Oh. But he had like four wives and he has 18 kids and I guess the world hates him. Okay.

The viewers hate him because of the way he treats his children and wives. But I didn't know any of this. So we just didn't get along because I had that gut feeling. Yeah. Of course he did. Do you think the experience like rewired how you view pain? Yeah. I feel like that's what it would do that for me.

Yeah. Even like mentally physically. You just got situations. And I was like, I'm good, guys. I know. Honestly, maybe. I, like, feel like I could do any. I'm not scared of anything.

Yeah. I'm fearless after that show. Literally, you've been through hell and then put yourself through hell on this show. I know. Psychotic. But, like, you really have proven to yourself that you can handle anything. Yeah, I really wanted to just do it for me. I was like, if I can do this, I can do goddamn anything.

You really can. I believe in you after all of this. And then you come on. something so intense and made some huge career decisions. But I feel like the end of an era kind of and like the start of a new you. Yeah, for sure. Has happened. When did you first realize that BFFs might not continue the same way? Before Dave had left BFFs, he left BFFs, gosh, I don't even remember what month, but we had known he was leaving for like three or four months before. Okay. So we had already known Dave was leaving. He was like, we can all just end it, or if you guys want to, you can keep doing

it. And Josh and I just weren't ready to say goodbye. We loved doing it. Yeah. It was so fun. We had big plans, big ideas to always do it in person, which we started that way. I would go to L.A. He would come to New York. And it was really fun. It was great in the beginning. It was a new type of show. We didn't really do the headlines anymore. It was really just like a me and Josh, like brother, sister, great show. And then the viewers were like, but we watched this to get our pop culture, like news. And we were like, damn, but the only reason it was the pop culture was funny was because we had this old guy, Dave, who didn't know what was going on. So it made it that funny dynamic.

And then it's two people who know what's going on talking about it. It just wasn't as funny or the dynamic shifted. You probably weren't as a line. Like it probably didn't fulfill you the same way. We just didn't want to talk about people anymore. We loved doing it, the pop culture, because we were explaining it to Dave, which was really fun and funny. Yeah. I mean, the peak of BFFs was amazing.

So grateful for that. It was such an incredible journey. Yeah. Oh my gosh. It was so funny too. I remember having to text to you a couple times being like, do you guys hate me? And you're like, we just have to talk about headlines. I'm sorry. No, like literally. Every time I'm like, do we have to talk about that? And Dave's like, we have to talk about everything. It makes sense. And I get it. But I was, I was always like so scared. Well, there's only just one. But I was like, oh God. No, I know. I always felt so bad. Everyone would always text us. But that's what happens when you have to talk about. That's another reason why

you probably lost like love for doing it is because you are constantly having to gossip about. other people and like talk about what headlines are saying and then you know all too well what that feels like exactly so you're like god this feels yeah that makes sense like kind of grew out of it I mean we started so young that was five years of our life which is insane and we knew BFFs was also going to end after we did our tour yeah and we wanted to end it on a good note we could have kept doing it for years and made money off of it but it just it felt like disingenuous yeah so we're like hey let's end it while we still love each other I respect that I was going to ask where things stand genuinely with you and him now because I feel like I always loved your dynamic. Oh my gosh,

love Josh. I truly feel like he's like a little brother to me. That's what it seems like. Yeah. That's how I always felt. He will always be. Always have a special place in my heart. Yeah. And do you feel like motivated and excited to build things on your own now? Yeah. Yeah. It is really exciting because that's how I started everything with like Plainbury in 2019. And it was like just me. And then I got thrust into the bar stool world. And I feel like I didn't take a back seat like on myself, but I was like working on furthering my career. But it does feel nice to just be in control of everything for once. Well, now I'm thinking about other traumatic things.

Like you also had to go through a public friendship breakup and like all that. And so that's, it was always my fear with my podcast. I was like, do I need a co-host or should I have someone? But then I was like, but anyone that I would have that with would be a close friend. And I wouldn't want to jeopardize that relationship because it is hard to work and always stay aligned with friends. And I think that that's, it's scary in any type of business to do that. For sure.

I mean, you really, it's what the old saying is like never mix work and pleasure, which is, it sounds so lame, but it's so true. It is so true. I've learned that too. The worst part is you always have to learn things the hard way. I know. And it's hard for us, I feel like, even no matter who we work with, we just become friends with the people. Yeah. And then it's so weird to have like, like, even like my production or my friends, they're my best friends.

And then the power dynamic is like, damn, I don't want to boss these people around. I don't want to tell them what to do. They're my friends. Yes. And then you lose the dynamic that you need to have in a workspace. And then it's a jumble. And you're like, damn, I just can't be best friends with the people I work with anymore. I can't not. Like my assistant, I'm like, she comes to my house to do things for me. And I literally feel terrible asking her to do anything. Right. I had to fire my assistant because I felt bad making her do things for me because she was my best friend. And I'm like, this is weird. I don't know. I will just do it myself. And then I won't do it. That is the struggle. I'm, I was, want to work with my friends because I go, oh, you're so smart at this and you're so good at this and you're creative here and you do this. And then I'm like, I can't tell you what to do. No, I just can't. I don't have it in me. No, I've no backbone when it comes to that show. No backbone. And bringing back, well, that was a tongue to say, bringing back plan brief.

Did that feel like coming home or starting over? It felt very nostalgic in a way. Yeah. I had never been happier to sit down and say the words like, welcome back to an episode of January. Because I did it for five years, two times a week. I mean, it was my baby. It was insane. And it went through so many, just so many different eras. Like it started with just me in my college dorm. And then I come to New York City. It's just me and all these TikTokers that I'm interviewing. Then we add my friend into the equation. And then we had two episodes a week. And then we switch out producers five million times. And then we have guests. Then we don't have guests. And then it goes on a hiatus for a year. And then the only thing I ever wanted

to do is bring it back. I always knew I wanted to, but I needed to take a year. I genuinely needed to take a full year to be like, okay, let's just focus on BFFs. Let's do one thing at a time to get baby steps to just, you can't throw yourself back into the ringer so fast. Well, when people do that and like even the way you are not continuing the BFFs, because yes, it financially could keep you like in a good place, but it doesn't align and it doesn't feel genuine. So to take a year off and not be throwing yourself into something just for the money and be like, okay, we'll bring it back and to intentionally go into it because your audience is so loyal. Yeah. And you want to give them what, you know, they've grown with you through so much that you're doing both yourself

and them a favor by, you know, intentionally getting back into it in the right way. Yeah. Which how you feel about dating too probably. Yeah. Everything with intention. Exactly. And it is, I do feel bad for all the people that supported me through everything. because the negativity is always louder than positivity in like every sense of the world. And that allowed me to kind of the negative people took control of it. And then I'm not giving back to the positive people who deserve, they've been loyal forever. And then I'm like, you know what, well, fuck this. I don't want to do it because of these awful people.

So it feels nice to be back and to be back with them. Yeah. The community's fun. How do you feel like your relationship with your audience has changed? I mean, it's true. We really have grown up together. And ever since last year, the moms love me. Really?

I, my audience has grown in so many different ways. Like, I still have the young audience, of course. But now such an older demographic has, like, latched on to me, and they're just, like, so proud of what I did publicly. They're like, I wish that I did this when I was 25 and stood up for myself. So they love me so much, and they give me such a new perspective on how I want to show up in front of a camera. And yet, it's just really cool. Like, we grew up doing the party era.

like I was a party girl and my content really revolved around that and I slowly like shifted out of that and I was very worried because I didn't know if I was going to be fun or interesting anymore and I was like it was never the partying that was fun or interesting it was just like my personality but I really I got nervous I'm like do I suck without all the extra I go through this all the time with how I show up online and because I same thing like gosh thank God social media didn't exist in my party era Well, it did, but it was more like, there was no Instagram stories. Like, I didn't have... No TikTok. No TikTok. And I was, I mean, it would have been entertaining, sure, but I, you were like a fun party girl. I was crazy.

No, I feel that, yeah. There's some shit that I'm like, I wish that was never online. Yeah, I would have had so many of those things haunting me right now. But I just, now I'm like, I don't share as much as I used to. And then I'm, I feel like, I don't. know. I'm like, am I losing it? Am I like, who am I? Yeah. And it's, it's so confusing because it is our jobs at the same time, but also you don't want to not be who you are and just for the views, you know? Yeah. And you don't really want to, it's like we're mixing work with pleasure

in a way. It's like you can't give your everything away to people that don't even know you because it always comes back to bite you in the ass, especially when you're vulnerable. So I'm very intentional with what I share now. Like there are so many things going on behind closed doors that I would have, first thing, take out my phone if I talked about, I am never going to share a relationship again. Like, I am never, I don't share anything with my friendships. I'm like, I'm so private in that sense and I share what I want to. Yeah. And it feels so much better. I don't know. The initial part of dating and then the second you share it, I feel like it becomes, I don't, like almost part of a pillar that you have to fill for your content. Yeah, literally. I mean, even in my,

with my ex. We had a very public relationship, quote unquote, but I think I posted maybe four or five videos with him. We dated for almost two years. So like I never shared anything about that relationship. It was very private yet public because we were like public figures. There's pictures of us, but no one knew what was going on with us ever. Yeah, that's, yeah, that I think about it. It's just public because we were both popular. Right. Yeah. And looking back, obviously, like, you're clearly not done evolving. I feel like you're just getting started. I feel like I'm just getting started. It's nice. On the Tart trip, I was with Christina Kirkman, and she's amazing. And I don't remember how old she is, but she was telling us about how your 20s, like everyone thinks it's the

best years of your life, and you feel like you have it figured out. And then throughout your 30s, you really start to know who you are. And I feel like I'm like on, I'm only 26, but I feel like I'm on that path, and it feels great. You're 26? Yeah. I know. Wait. When I podcasted with you last, I thought you were 26. I know. Well, I feel like I've been 28 since I was 8 because I like grew up very dramatically and had like a crazy traumatic life. But also like a great life, not to like not a pity party. But I had to grow up really fast. So everyone always thinks so much older. Why did you have to grow up really fast? What happened? There was just a lot of drugs and addiction in my family. And it was just like kind of rough childhood. But I think it made me who I am and it made me able to deal with all these situations. Well, I have good news for you. 20s do not matter. They are like the most selfless, no, sorry. They're the most selfish years of your life where you just don't even care who you are.

You're not figuring it out. I feel like 30s are like, okay, who am I? Then I turned 40 and I'm like, why was I so scared of 40? I feel like the best version of myself by far. And then talking to Elaine Hendrix, so then she goes in, she's 54 now, about to turn 55 and she's, everything just keeps getting better. okay I love this so everyone kept being like well 30s are the new 20s or 40s or the new 30s I think we just all can accept that we just keep getting better with age I think I really do think women are taking hold of themselves and as like age now it's you're becoming more powerful well and I'm like it's so funny looking back on like my mom's gender my mom looks younger now than she did in her 30s like what were they doing wearing those outfits I know right what business did they wearing like pants up to here and like just not flattering anything like I just feel like even style and looks are evolving where women are just becoming who they are more and more, and that shines through

on the outside. Yeah. I mean, just as a society, we are centering men way less, way less, way less, and we don't have to anymore. And it's just clearly showing up by women being more successful and happy and looking better. I've had a sign in my mirror for 10 years that says work on the inside and it'll all show on the outside. That's not what the sign says. I've had it for 10 years and I'm like shitting on what it. Work on the inside and the outside will fall into place. Yeah. That's just what it is. And you just shine brighter. And it's like even seeing you saying like you feel like you have life back. Yeah. So you can see it in your eyes. And Botox, of course. Of course. I will never not. Never, never not. All the facials. All the, but I will get a facelift when I'm 50. I don't. So I'm all about that too. But I do think it radiates in a in a way when you learn who you are. It's cool. It is cool. Yeah, I'm going to brag for a little minute. I got these little like Italian. leather tall kitten heel boots in espresso brown from quince i saw this whole thing from the

stylist about how espresso colors brown colors all those things are so in right now and it's the color of 2026 and these little booties are everything they're perfect for all day wear super comfy the little kitten heel gives it just the right lift and i love the sculpted square toe i was not sure if i was sold on square toe and i was looking around new york the other day it's in okay it's a modern twist on a classic timeless shape so quince has honestly become my go-toe for not just me but holiday gifts this year they've got everything they've got silk tops they've got skirts perfectly cut denim cozy out of wear and these boots every piece is made from premium materials crafted ethically and designed to last the fit the stitching the details it's all just i would say elevated and classy

and it's not just clothing either quince has gifts for home bath kitchen travel something literally for everyone on your list and I also cannot help but pick out a little something for myself every single time. So find gifts so good that you'll want to keep them with Quince. Go to quince.com slash vine for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash vine to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Again, quince.com slash vine. So, 2026, looking ahead, what kind of life do you want? I was think of a word, but I'm like, I don't know if I like that anymore.

I hate the new year, new you. I hate that. I hate that too, yeah. But like... But just like the next year, I guess. What energy do you want to bring into 2026? I just like really, really want to be unapologetically myself, which I feel like I always have been, but the last year I was all over the place because I'm just like trying to

pick myself back up. I'm really focusing on things that I know will make me feel better and make me happy. I think New York City is an amazing place, and it's done me so well for the past six years, but it's also, like, hurt me in so many ways. So last week, I just bought a place in Florida. You did? Yeah. I'm going to split my time between Florida.

That is so cool. In New York. You're such a snowbird. Yeah. No, literally. But I'm like, I'm going to be able to get away from this hectic life or just, like, ground myself. Yeah. That's how I feel about Nashville.

Yeah. I'm like, I really just need to step out of it sometimes when New York is crazy. And I've grown so accustomed to love the craziness. where I'm like, I need to appreciate just being a normal human for once again. You need still. You need stillness, yeah. Even just sitting in an apartment feels chaotic to me here because of all the noises. Yeah.

Like I'm like, I need quiet and still and like a yard. Yeah, and now I love that. Like I love the chaos and I'm like, this just kind of doesn't seem healthy or normal or sustainable. Yeah, beach sounds nice. To have to thrive in chaos all the time. No. And just listening to the ocean or being near water is going to ground your ground you. Yeah.

Being warm. I'm excited for you. I'm excited too. And I'm like, maybe I'll find a Florida relationship. Because New York is ass, dude. Yeah, but Florida scares me. I know. But where I'm going is not scary.

Okay. Yeah. It's very much everyone from the northeast in the town that I'm moving to. Are you keeping private where in Florida? Yes, yes. Cool. Oh, I love that for you too. Oh, my gosh.

I just had a, like, full-body feel of how much Florida's going to change you. hope so because I'm freaking freaking out. Like I can't sleep at night now. I'm like, what am I doing? Florida. I am such like an east coast, but like I am a northeast girl. I'm a city rat. You're going to have the best of both. I don't know. I'm terrified. But we'll see. I feel like it will be good for me to challenge or like to change myself and challenge myself in a way that I haven't. What a blessing that you can do that. I'm so lucky. I'm so grateful that I'm able to even do that. You got to do the lucky girl syndrome where you just always talk about how lucky you are. Yeah. I'm so oh my gosh, I'm so lucky.

Yeah. Last question. No, I have rapid fire. But would you, I want you to do dancing with the stars. I want to do dancing with the stars so bad. I feel like. You've done it, right? I won. Wait, what? I won. Okay, see, like, I like always only ever, that's awesome. Can I have a high five for that? You sure? Like, are you serious? When did you win? Four years ago, I think it was. Were you good at dancing? I grew up dancing. Okay. See, like, I have no rhythm. I'm so unflexible. that's better people i feel like people love people love the people who are good dancers like alex earl and robert irwin but they love the journey of someone starting and not being good to getting better and seeing the improvement every week like i would put my whole bit of see into that like i would

really try my hard i want to do it so bad i'd be voted off week one though no you wouldn't no you wouldn't i don't i'm like so terrified of that it's scary that all the voting power is like not in your hands. Well, the internet just, gosh, it just goes to show what happened to Whitney Levitt. That was so devastating because she was incredible dancing. I looked forward to her dances every week because I was like, you are a freak of nature. You are so good. She was so good. Insanely talented. It backfired on the internet because now she's on Broadway, but everyone just wanted her to like to take her down. But she was, but that is scary about how it does, you know, it, it is a voting show. yeah but but i only watched that's true following and i only watched it on tictock but i would

only look for alexes and whitney's like dance every week yes unbelievable yeah unbelievable um well i'm manifesting it for you and you're only 26 holy shit you have so much life ahead of you yeah hopefully i like don't get hit by a bus when i walk outside you won't okay promise yeah stop putting that out there you're lucky girl i'm like such a hypochondriac recently i don't know why i say that but really my, I'm so glass half empty. I'm a very negative thinker. I had to get glass half full tattooed on me because I was so glass half empty. I have a tattooed on me to like remind myself to be better.

I should get the same tattoo because I'm always doom and gloom. Same. And I'm trying to fix it, but it's still who I am. I know me too. Yeah. What is the other tattoo that you had that it killed me last time you were on my podcast? Which one? I don't know.

There was one that I was like, you're my favorite. Sleep when you're dead maybe? Nope. Be a decent human. How lucky are we? Oh, you wouldn't last a day in my head. Yeah. Yeah.

Because you wouldn't. That is so good. Okay. This is just light. What do they call it? Lightning round? Yeah. I'm trying to come up with a different thing for rapid fire because I'm like, say it every time.

Okay. So, okay. I have to answer fast. Yeah. Well, no, you don't. Okay. I say that, but it's take your time. Worst coping mechanism you still occasionally have or defend.

I think self-isolation. Like, if I'm like, I don't, I don't want to face anything, I will lock myself away. Yeah. Which sometimes I think is good, but I know it's bad. I feel that. I already know your answer for this. Most toxic thought you're working on getting hit by a bus? Literally, like being so pessimistic to the point where I'm like, this is awful, Brianna, can you have one positive thought?

I'm so, I'm not negative towards other people, but anything to do with myself, the most negative girl in the world. Well, I also, it's fear-based for me. I live in a fear-based thought where I do go to worst-case scenario for things. But it's like I'm trying not to be negative, but I'm like, I'm just a little. scaredy cat of bad things happening. Yeah. I just like, yeah, I need to be better on that. I need to be more positive. Yeah. A compliment you secretly crave. I just, I mean, I love when people tell me I'm funny. But I feel like I get that a lot. Yeah. I can never not hear it. That's my favorite compliment, I would say too. For best. One habit you know you need to quit.

Vaping. Oh yeah, duh. You did a whole rant about vaping, which cut it out. Can you? I cut it out for special forces. And then I was good for 21, 27 days. I can't remember. And then I just picked to back up and I didn't need to. Like, I felt amazing and I don't know why I picked it back up. Like, I was done. Yeah. I need to quit because I'm like going to die. I, okay, so Katie Maloney was vaping at my house and I was like, let me try that. I just about died from coughing. I thought it was going to be this glorious experience of like, isn't this so scary that you're like coughing to death? And then I'm just like, it's so easy for me. Oh, I almost died and threw up. Yeah. I wish I was you. I wish I wasn't addicted to it. If you quit for a while, if you went back, would it make you

cough or no? Yes. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Let's work on that. We'll try to get to that. Babine scares me for other people. My sister vapes too, and I'm like, stop. It's so bad. Something you're deeply sensitive about, but joke through. My traumatic childhood. I'm like, oh, no, it was awful, but it's fine. And I try to make jokes about, like, having, like, a bunch of crackheads in my family, but yeah. That's, yeah, that makes, I feel like that's a lot of people who are funny. Yeah. It always stems from something. darker because that is a coping mechanism. Yeah, for sure. Well, I loved talking to you. I always do. I always love talking to you. I get sad sometimes. There are some people where I get sad when it's

over and you're one of them. I was like, what else can we talk about? I know, right? You have to come on my podcast. I would love to. Yes. If my flight gets canceled tomorrow, please text me. I will text you. Okay. with all the best movies The land of days are brutal So we're feeling fooling stream Pluto TV Stream Pluto TV Streaming Pluto TV for free

Stream blockbuster hits Like 21 Jump Street, Ted, the expendables And so much more on Pluto TV Stream now, pay never Hi, I'm Lauren And I'm Chandler And we're the host of Pop Apologist Podcast a weekly podcast devoted to celebrity gossip, Hollywood deep dives, real housewives drama,

and anything and everything, Taylor Swift. We're two sisters who make no apologies for our love of pop culture and the fact that A-listers might mean more to us than each other. Join us on your favorite podcast app every Wednesday for Pop Apologists. Pop Apologists, your new favorite sister and celeb podcast.