Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Chelsea Handler | 50, Fearless & Giving Zero F*s! (REPEAT)

Episode Date: January 29, 2026

#915. REPEAT OUR GREATEST HIT EPISODES:Chelsea. Freaking. Handler. The legendary comedian, best-selling author, and unapologetic queen of telling it like it is joins the pod, and NOTHING is off-limits. Chelsea gets real about turning 50 (and why she finally has the body she wanted at 20), what led her to write this new book and why men have never been the center of her story. She spills on sexting a certain governor, how stacking small wins (and rejections) led to her break in comedy, and her love of… well, you’ll have to listen. Plus, her brutally honest thoughts on cancel culture, the biggest “oops” moment of her career, and why she refuses to fit into society’s mold of what a woman should be. Get a copy of Chelsea’s new book, I’ll Have What She’s Having, available now at chelseahandler.com/book. This one is hilarious, raw, and SO Chelsea. Buckle up!If you’re LOVING this podcast, please follow and leave a rating and review below! PLUS, FOLLOW OUR PODCAST INSTAGRAM HERE!Thank you to our Sponsors! Check out these deals!Covergirl: Go the distance with COVERGIRL’s new Eye Enhancer Wrap Tubing Mascara for a lash extension effect. Shop at your nearest retailer now. Only from Easy, Breezy, Beautiful COVERGIRL.comASPCA Pet Insurance: To explore coverage, visit ASPCApetinsurance.com/VINE. Baked By Melissa: Right now, Baked by Melissa is offering our listeners 20% off your order at Bakedbymelissa.com/VINE.Knix: Head to Knix.com and use code VINE15 for 15% off your order and grab yourself the Uplift bra that may just change your bra game for good!Ka’Chava: Rewild your nutrition at kachava.com and use code VINE. New customers get $20 off an order of two bags or more, now through the 31st! Audible: Listen to Messy Love: Difficult Conversations for Deeper Connection now on Audible. Go to Audible.com/MessyLove to start listening today.Booking.com: Head over to booking.com and start your listing today. Get Seen. Get Booked on Booking.com!EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: (8:05) – Chelsea on why men have never been the center of her story: "You’re not my story, you’re part of the story."(14:40) – Turning 50: "I have the body I wanted at 20 now at 50."(21:17) – Chelsea’s “big break” moment: "It was a bunch of little wins stacked up."(24:37) – Texting with Governor Cuomo: "I went on The View to declare my love for him..."(47:59) – The biggest “oops” moment of her career: "I forget that my boyfriend’s stories are theirs too..."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This episode of Off the Vine is brought to you by Cover Girl. Go the distance with Cover Girl's new eye enhancer wrap tubing mascara for a lash extension effect. Shop at your nearest retailer now only from easy, breezy, beautiful Cover Girl. ASPCA Pet Insurance. To explore coverage, visit ASPCApetenturance.com slash vine. Baked by Melissa right now, Baked by Melissa is offering our listeners 20% off your order at bakedbymelissa.com slash vine. head on over to nix.com and grab yourself the uplift bra that may just change your bra game for good that's k-n-i-x.com code vine 15 for 15% off your order kachava rewild your nutrition at kachava dot com and use code vine new customers get $20 off an order of two bags or more now through the 31st that's k a c h a va va va dot com code vine audible listen to messy love difficult conversations for deeper connection now on audible go to audible.com slash messy love to start listening today and booking.com.

Head on over to booking.com and start your listing today. Get seen, get booked on booking.com. You're listening to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Hey, Vino's real quick, if you are listening right now, which obviously you are or you wouldn't be hearing this, can you hit the subscribe or follow button on whatever platform you're on? Please, that one simple thing helps more than you even realize it allows me to keep growing on this podcast and making these episodes the best they can possibly be obviously for you. That's the only favorite I'm going to ever ask. Okay, it truly means the world to me.

Thank you. Now let's get into it. Hey, everybody. Welcome to Off the Vine podcast. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. Another legendary guest I got to have on the podcast today. She has been someone I've always looked up to, somebody who inspires me. She did that on this podcast.

She's hilarious. Just truly the most authentic version of herself who gives zero. You guessed it, it's Chelsea Handler. So you don't drink a lot of water either. I don't. I don't like water. I find it to be a real buzzkill. You know, like, I have to doctor my water up with so many electrolytes.

And then at that point, I'm like, can I just snort the electrolytes? If I'm just looking for the electrolytes, why do I even have to put them in the water? That's a good point. Like, do they work if you put them in ginger ale? Because I would rather do that. I've never tried. But I will say yesterday at the airport, I went to put electrolytes in water, not realizing it was fizzy water. and it exploded on the counter and there's a huge line behind me and everyone was annoyed.

Yeah. I have elementi, you know, those cans. Yes. So those are carbonated. Those are good. And they're electrolytes. So it's like all of my favorite things colliding. Like carbonated water with electrolytes.

Yes. I love those. And it's so salty too and they're delicious. Yeah. Yeah. Very salty. Which is perfect because they're a sponsor on this podcast. So I'm so glad we said that.

Okay. Tell me about this book. You're releasing it on your 50th birthday. Yes. It's my gift to the world for my birthday. Happy birthday to all of us, not just you. Yes, yes, that's what I was informed that it was going to be released on my 50th birthday. No, that's not fair. They asked. They gave me two dates, two options, and I thought I might as well just blow it out, you know what I mean? On my birthday.

50 is such a fun one. Are you doing anything crazy? I think so. I mean, I have lots of different kind of like different groups of people and parties planned throughout the year. So I'll fold that into like my book launch. I'll do something in New York. I'll do something in L.A. I always do a ski video each year. That is my tradition. I know. I'm obsessed with your ski videos. So I'm going to do that before my birthday this year. Yeah. I have like a real shoot planned for that. So that'll be a nice festive thing. Where is your favorite place to ski? I'm going to Beaver Creek at the end of the month. Oh, you are? Yeah. Oh, fun. I'm so excited. I ski in Whistler because I have a place there.

You have a place. I lived in Vancouver for 11 years. Oh, Canadian. Yes. And Whistler is one of my favorite places on earth. Yeah, me too. I love Whistler. It's like my little village life when I go there. I have like this little, I love it. I have all my friends that are Canadian up there, my ski buddies. Yes. Do people leave you alone or are they chill or do they bother you? I mean, people generally just say hi and no one's stalking me. Well, I disagree. Some girl, I don't know if you saw this, but I was scrolling TikTok last night and some girl freaked out that she was at the same airport as you in Vegas. Oh. Did you hear about this? Was I at an airport? When? Were you not at an air?

I don't know, maybe. It doesn't sound right. Stop. I would die if she was just trying to get your attention or something because this person like was going, I think she has a podcast too that's like does kind. Yeah. What's her name? Tanna something.

I'm losing my mind. I'm literally about to start sobbing. I have to walk outside. Hold on. Oh my God. I literally had to come outside for like a breath of fresh air. I'm in the airport right now. I'm dead alone in this tiny Vegas airport.

And I sit down and I look up and Chelsea Hamler is like 10. Is that JetSuite? Maybe. Oh, okay, yes. Yes, that makes sense. So she was losing her noodle and she could not bring herself to go say hi to you. And apparently you've changed her life and she's such a fan. You know what?

I love when people appreciate me that much and then also don't approach me. Like what? That's like a jackpot situation. Because I'm not a bitch when people approach me. I'm always, you know, very nice. And I'm always, as long as I'm not with my family sitting down at a dinner table when someone approaches and asks me to get up to take a picture. Yes.

I'm pretty, you know. Approachable? Approachable. Yeah. So that's why there's not, I mean, I appreciate that attitude and a reaction. Yeah. But no, there's not like, yeah, it's not like I walk around being like, don't talk to me. Well, at airports, it's so tricky because, I mean, you saw Mel Robbins was just here.

I'm obsessed with her and I try so hard in airports. I'm like, let them because I just find everyone so irritating. I mean, not seeing people who come up or what. I'm just saying people in general. Just the airport is irritating. Airport. In general. So anything on top of that is a double irritant.

Exactly. So I'm always just like shaking, being like last night a guy was literally picking his foot beside me on an airplane. Yeah. I'm really done with men and their feet on planes and also having them exposed. Why would you ever think that you could touch your foot in a public area? Your bare foot. Why would you take your foot out of your shoe? It's covered.

Keep your feet covered. And who wears no socks to an airport and sandals? And then takes them off to walk through security. Oh. What about people who walk to the bathroom on a plane with their shoes off? Into the urine-soaked bathroom floor that's waiting for them. The amount of times I see that happen on a plane blows my mind. I just feel like there's so many.

I used to do a segment on my podcast called Can You Not? And half the time it was about airports and just the disgusting humans who fly these days. Yeah. People are, people, my sister was telling me a story about. someone who's sitting next to her on a plane who brought spaghetti with clams on the plane. No. Yeah, with the shells. And then what?

Like, and then what happens to the shells? I was once on a plane where somebody brought oysters onto the plane. Oysters! That's like bringing hard-boiled eggs and tuna. And then hard-boiled eggs, don't get me started. My producer on my podcast has a hard-boiled egg problem. And I told her, first of all, if you're going to bring hard-boiled eggs anywhere, you need to swallow them whole. You can't take bites out of hard-willed eggs and then just expect the rest of the people to deal with that.

Agreed. I agree. There's a lot of food out there that if people bring on planes, hard boiled eggs should be illegal. Yeah, they are so foul, you know? Hard boiled eggs. It's like I wouldn't even eat that in my own kitchen if people were there. Like, I wouldn't do that. You know what? I was traumatized in the fourth grade. My mom packed hard boiled eggs for me at school. And all the kids laughed at me and wouldn't sit next to me. And I've just been traumatized by hard boiled eggs now. Yeah, yeah. My mom used to make me cream cheese and jelly sandwiches. Pardon? I was like, it's peanut butter, you dumb ass. cream cheese and jelly, I would open my lunch. What?

And there would be like a half-eaten apple. My parents, I was the youngest of six, so they were just over it. You know what I mean? My dad would take a bite out of an apple, put it in a lunch box, like my little smurfette, little egg that I had. And then I'd open up and then it would be like an egg that it would be like a not hard-boiled actual egg in my lunchbox. That's how over-medium.

Talk about neglect. I mean, yeah. So that's why. Wait, you have five siblings? Yes. Wow. Yeah, I'm the youngest of six, which is exactly the place I want to be. and my family because I'm the youngest but I'm also in charge.

Fair. I know what's up and that you know they have to listen to me. Otherwise, it's a wrap. I'm only the youngest of two and that makes a difference. If there was six. Right, right. Six is different. That does shape who you are. I think so many people like you are one of my favorite people to follow on Instagram. Just the skits you do about just men or politics or anything, you bring humor but so many facts

and like good points and you're my favorite person to follow for that kind of thing. and I imagine your book is going to be similar to this. Tell me about it. Well, my book was, I got this book deal when I was, I had fallen in love with Joe Coy publicly, very publicly. Okay. This guy that I dated, he was a comedian and we were like, you know, head over heels and love and blah, blah, blah.

And this editor reached out and was like, well, I would love to hear the Chelsea Handler version of a love story because you're obviously in love. This is very unexpected that you're singing from the rooftops of Instagram, talking about your love. And I was like, yes, I am in love. I want to write about it. I can't believe I get this to you in this life.

Like I feel so grateful and fortunate already with everything that I've been able to do. And I'm not somebody who's ever wanted to be married or have children. So like men in my life have never been the epicenter. Do you know what I mean? It's a side piece. Like it's, it's, you're part of the, they're not my story. You're part of the story. So when I fell in love with Jo Koi, I was like, oh, God, you know, I have so much to say about this.

I was like, my whole heart opened up, you know. And then we broke up. And I was like, oh, whoopsie doodle. Like, I don't. know what this book is going to be about. And then my editor's like, what about writing about your breakup? Because I had handled it in a more graceful way than I had ever handled a breakup before. You know, I wasn't telling anyone what happened. I didn't throw anyone under the bus. I didn't kind of publicly embarrassed or do anything like that. Did you want to? No, no. I just, I'm older

and you're more mature now and I'm more, you know, I just don't need to do that. I just, I don't want to do that. That's a bad habit, you know, that I've done enough. Although there is a little shout out to him in my comedy special, my Netflix special, which will be out. next month but that not a shout out to him but you know a kind of a joke about him yeah um but anyway other than that I was trying to remain you know just really mature and loving and not to slam the door shut you know and never look at like to keep the door open in an act of love and compassion and understanding for the other person and as a just nice act of maturity on my own behalf right and then I was like I don't want to write a book about that because again he's part of my

story. He's not my story. Yep. So I just kind of set like let it, you know, I just left it alone for a few months, like about nine months. Like, you know, I was having a pregnancy idea at party. Like I was like, okay, I have to impregnate myself with an idea for a book. And then I just was inspired by the idea of what my life is and the life that I've created for myself by being truthful, by being honest, by never pretending to be something that I'm not, by taking so much shit from men, my life. my whole life because I don't fit into the mold, you know, that you're told is of value, which is to be a wife and to be a mother and to be quiet and to be pretty and to be thin. You know, all of those things, I was always just like, fuck you.

I'm not going to do what any man tells me to do. Like, anytime men tell me to do something, I almost want to do the opposite. I feel that. And in many times I do. Yeah. You know, when I bought my house in Majorca, I bought this beautiful house, which is one of the best things I've ever done in my life. I talk about this in the book.

And I bought it in Majorca. and I had consulted with my business manager about it. I was like, oh, I found this house. I'm going to redo it. It's right on the water in my archive. This is like a dream of mine. And he was like, you, that's a really bad decision. You know, you can't.

The Spanish economy, did it. I'm like, forget about that. This is what is happening right now. And the more you tell me no, the more I'm going to do it. Meanwhile, the Spanish economy turned around in a year. The whole place I bought turned around in a year. Like, I bought this house. I did it.

It's fabulous. And then the whole port that I live in all kind of judged their houses up. And so like the property value has increased. I've written two books at that house. I've supplied so many of my friends and family with amazing vacations there. And like I, you know, that was an example of just like grabbing life by the balls. I just finished Chelsea lately. I'm like, I deserve a present.

I've worked my ass off for the last eight years and I want a gift to myself. And the book is about that. It's about getting after it. And like being the best version of yourself, being responsible about your self-awareness and your growth and your evolution, but also being a sister, being a sister to all women and anyone who does not feel seen, showing up in ways that, you know, people aren't necessarily expected to do unless you're a family member. And what that kind of yields in life, when you are loving and generous, like, generous, when you are, I was going to say, munificent. And then I was like, that's too big of a word for right now in this

moment, I think. Sometimes I threw out these words and people like, who the fuck do you think you are? I'm like, do you understand how much reading I do? Like, you know, when you're house a podcast. I have to read like three books a week. I mean, Mel Robbins. You just had her on. I have her coming on my podcast. I watched two TED Talks. I read, I watched a documentary. I'm like, oh, God. I feel like I live with her. You know what I mean? Okay, go the distance with Covergirl's new eye enhancer wrap tubing mascara for a lash extension effect. This officially became the mascara I reach for every single morning. You already know I ride hard for Cover Girl. So the second I heard they launched a tubing mascara. I ran. And let me tell you, it delivers. It delivers. It gives a lash extension effect without

me having to do anything, really. The tubium formula is my favorite part. These little ultra-stretch, lightweight tubes wrap around every single lash. And then it gives you that instant length, lift, and definition. The brush is flexible and tapered, so it actually separates your lashes for like this clump-free look. And the wear time is up to 30 hours, totally flake-free and smudge-proof. I don't have to check the mirror all day, wondering if my mascara has made a little break for it. And then removal at night, easiest part. Just warm water on a cotton pad, press for a few seconds. And then the tubes literally roll right off.

So no tugging, no scrubbing, nothing. I am obsessed. I love it. It also comes in three eye-enhancing shades so you can switch it up depending on your mood. So I actually love the max motion black right now because, well, I just love a bold lash moment all the time. But I once in a while do their espresso energy because it's just a softer look. and I just love a brown. And then midnight stride for that bright, wide awake vibe.

So if you're ready for lifted lashes that show up for you all day, this is your sign. Shop I enhance a wrap tubing mascara at your nearest retailer now. Only from easy, breezy, beautiful cover girl. Okay, obviously everyone knows that I'm obsessed in love. They are my everything. Pino and ramen. We all know I birth them in my heart. And honestly, they are my favorite little stinker troublemakers ever.

I'm absolutely positively obsessed with them. we get it. And on that note, I have a quick message from today's sponsor, the ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program. Pets are obviously family and we would do anything to keep them happy and healthy, but vet bills, I have a group chat going about vet bills because I'm the one with insurance in the group. But they sneak up faster than Pino, you want to steal my socks or shoes. This is a favorite thing. He wants to bring everybody's shoe when they come to the door. Anyways, that's why ASPCA pet health insurance is worth checking out because their plans are flexible, customizable and help you be prepared for whatever your furry little troublemakers want to get into.

And the bonus is when you enroll, you get a $25 Amazon gift card, just a little treat for you while you take care of your little pets. ASPCA pet health insurance has been around for nearly 20 years actually and it has helped cover almost 1 million pets. You can tailor your plan to fit your budget, lifestyle, and your pet's unique little quirks because let's be real, those vet bills never come at a convenient time. Am I right? To explore a coverage, visit ASPCA pet insurance.com slash vine.

That's ASPCA pet insurance.com slash vine. Eligibility, restrictions apply. Visit ASPCA pet insurance.com slash Amazon terms for more info. This is a paid advertisement. Insurance is underwritten by either Independence American Insurance Company or United States Fire Insurance Company and produced by PTZ Insurance Agency Limited. The ASPCA is not an insurer and is not engaged. in the business of insurance.

How do you feel about turning 50? Because I feel like 50 is such a cool milestone. 40, I'm excited. I'm 39. And everyone gets freaked out to turn 40. I'm not because I look up to women like you who are just like owning where they are at. I'm not married. I don't have kids.

I don't know what my future holds. But I'm just like, it doesn't matter because I'm just going to be true to myself and not follow the path that other people think I should follow. So does 50 feel even better than 40? I mean, I'm stronger than I was when I was 40 physically, like stronger. You are strong. I go at it at the gym in a ways. Like, I have the body that I wanted when I was 20 now that I'm 50.

I have that body. Like I'm not, you know, so that aspect of things on the material side of things is good. I feel like I look great. I'm healthy. I take very good care of myself. And it's not bullshit what everybody says about aging and how you become more confident. Like, you know, having sex, you do what you tell people what you want. and then they do it.

You know what I mean? Like, when I was 20, I didn't know how, I was faking orgasms. I was like, wait, oh, is he okay? Like, such a dumbass, you know? Same. And then you think you're supposed to be doing what they do in the porn? So you're just like making wild noises and like thinking you need to be like contorting to just to, you don't know what you're doing.

Yeah, no, you don't know what you're doing. So for me, I think the celebration, I have no problem aging. I'm totally down with it. 50, I don't go, uh-huh. Yeah. I can't believe I'm old. I'm like, oh, my God, this is awesome. I'm redefining what 50 is for me.

Like, I didn't think this was going to be what 50 was. I thought I'd be retired. And, you know, I'm touring all the time. I'm on my seventh. This is my seventh book. Holy. My seventh book. Like, I think the thing that I get prideful about with regard to my own growth is, again,

just the fact that I've never let people tell me how to behave. Yeah. Where does that come from? How do you get that? I don't know. But I want to infuse any woman I can with it. because it's, I think I was just born that way with this like kind of false confidence and then it becomes real. And you're like, I am confident. Why have no reason not to be confident? Right. I have this really fun life, this life that I dreamed about when I was a little girl. And the book starts out with like an essay that I wrote. I didn't write it when I was when I was a little girl, but it was like this daydream I had about, I would daydream about the kind of woman I wanted to be when I grew up. And I wanted to be loud and brave and stand up for things. And I wanted to have lots of lovers. And I wanted to have.

lots of adventures and I wanted to speak another language and I wanted to travel the world and all those things are true. And I am about to lead like I've been in Whistler for a month skiing and I am about to, you know, have a really big year commemorating this milestone birthday. So I'm pretty happy about life, my life. And I want other women to feel, you know, like anything is possible when you really work hard and you are thoughtful about what you're doing and you're intentional. Yeah. About being brave and being, you know, bold. Yes.

I think the real true, like, meaning of, like, our purpose and our life is to be truly who we are. Like, who are you? Yeah. Get, like, real with yourself and find out what your personality is. What do you like? Like, when I discovered I loved skiing, I'm like, I'm going to get so good at skiing. Yeah.

Like, I'm going to make sure. I'm going to pay someone. Yeah. To make me, like, the best skier I can be. be. And that like became this. Now I have a house in Whistler. I go there, you know, for three months, sometimes a year. I need to find a Canadian man. I have one. And I mean, hello, what do you think I'm doing around here? This is already telling you what kind of life I'm leading. And you have to have one for the mountains. You have to have one for the city. You have to have one for the beach. There are all

sorts of men flying around. No shortage of that. That is amazing. Is he Canadian? The Whistler guy's Canadian? The mountain man by the mountains is, yeah. He's Canadian, yes. I love that. That's so fun. And would you say this book is, I think I heard you say, that it's a tribute to your fans? It's a true, yeah, it's a tribute to, yeah, totally. Everything I do is a tribute to my fans. I mean, they gave me a career and I've been doing this now for 25 years, I think, and probably longer. I'm 40 and I'll be 50. Yeah, no. And yeah, it's a tribute to my fans. It's, the title I'll have what she's having was given to me by my editor. She read the book and was like, okay, I have a title for you. Yeah. It's like, at the end of it, you want,

what you have. Yeah. Or you want to get like, you know, get after things in the same way that you have. And I was like, I don't know if I can name a book. I'll have what she's having. I'm talking about myself. And so and she, and then everyone else read and they're like, no, that's the title. Really? So I was like, okay, I can, you know, I'm old enough now to not be so obstinate with my opinions about my own stuff. Yeah. Where I take some feedback, you know? Yeah. Especially from women. I always appreciate feedback from other women. Do you get nervous still about releasing? Because this is what you said, your seventh book? Do you get nervous, really? Do you get nervous, releasing books about what other people are going to think or do you just do it because you're like,

I believe in this book? Yeah, I mean, I think you just have to put all your positivity right in your basket. You know what I mean? It's like a bowling ball of energy. You believe in it. You love it. You put it out there. Yeah. And then the energy and like kind of force behind it is so powerful. Nothing can really stand in its way. Right. You just kind of go and bowl. And then it's going to be a success, hopefully. And if not, then okay, that's not. But I mean, it, it was. It, will be. Well, I know for a fact it will be. And I want to talk about the fact that you moved to LA at 19 to live with your aunt in Bel Air. It feels like from the moment you made it to L.A., you kept getting into these, like, hilarious situations and playing pickleball with like royalty

or having dinner with Woody Allen. Like, do you think you just put yourself in positions that not a lot of people would as you go for things? And it ends up working out for you because not a lot of other, like, for example, one of my friends is a motivational speaker about doing things. that you want to do before you die or having this bucket list. And he says that the options are so much more available to people that put themselves out there because not a lot of people are doing this. Do you think like you're just, do you know what I'm saying? Absolutely. No, absolutely.

Yeah, I'm open. Yeah. I'm not a closed off person. So if you say we're going away for the weekend, first of all, I'm not a control freak. I don't have a, like, I'm a type A from about 8 a.m. to 11 a.m. And then I'm a type C. I don't give a shit. Like I work for three hours a day pretty much.

hardcore and then I'm done. Yeah. And I'm open to anything. So if my friends say, hey, we're going away for a weekend, pack your bags, I don't ask any questions. I don't want to be involved in any logistical planning. That is not my Medellé. My strength is showing up and being open and having a great time wherever I go. Yeah. And that pretty much serves me well. The reason I get into these ridiculous situations is probably because I'm just a public person and I get more opportunities to be around, you know, other public figures. Yeah. But I don't. ever take myself too seriously. Yeah. And so all the stories in the book about like playing pickleball at Kenny Bunkport

or my Woody Allen dinner party story, those are all in the book and those are all situations I just kind of found myself in. What was like your big break moment? My big break moment. I mean, there were so many moments. There was never one big break. Really? I was on a show Girls Behaving Badly before Chelsea Laley. And that was like a little stepping stone. I published my first book, My Horizontal Life, a collection of One Night Stans when I was doing girls. behaving badly. And then when I got Chelsea lately, I had another book come out. And that was kind of this like, you know, it was a kind of big moment. And then it became really, really successful, like well known, I guess. But before that, it was just a bunch of little successes, you know,

you're just kind of like stacking up wins. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of rejection. And, but you got to be okay with that. Like, you cannot get upset about rejection. Yeah. I feel like, I grew up trying to be a dancer and I'm in my 20s like I moved to Vancouver to dance like that's what I thought I was going to do and I had the false confidence I was like I'm the best dancer I'm obviously going to get whatever I want in this world and the rejection over and over and over I was like oh my gosh and I had to give up my dance career and because I was like I'm just not good enough so I went on the bachelor oh well that thank you thank God for that right thank God for that and then I really knew what it was like to feel publicly rejected.

Assailed. I feel like that show is really bad for women. I mean, what are the chances that that many women are going to walk in, see one guy, and all we're all going to be attracted to that guy? I mean, give me a break. It's brainwashing. Yeah.

It's, you know, it's the thing you walk in and you go, it's a competition. Did I really want to live in Iowa for the farmer Chris Souls who like, no. But as soon as I got there, I was like, I'm obsessed with him because everyone else was. and the producers are putting them on this pedestal and everyone's making you think that they're just God's gift to women. I'm like, oh my God, and I fell for it. I totally fell for it.

Oh, God. And then as soon as you get out of it. It's like a cult. It is. And as soon as you get out of it, you're like, oh, what? You like wake up and smack yourself and you go back to talking to your friends and family and people that you actually like and ground you and took me two days to get over who I thought I was going to marry.

Yeah, two days. Yeah. Because I was out of the bum. Right, of course. You know that girl Bethany Joy Lenz? She just wrote a book about being in a cult. She was on One Tree Hill. No?

Yeah, I just talked to her because she has a new book out too. And I was learning about, I'm not in a cults. Like, I don't like to even hear, like, watch documentaries. I don't like that vibe. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's just too. But I had to read this book because she was coming on the podcast.

And it was very, very interesting that you could be in real life and also be a part of this cult. Like, those two things were dovetailing together. Right. Like, wake up. Yeah. You have real people around you when you go to work. And then she was flying back and forth to this farm in Idaho. And that was where the cult family was.

And it was just like, oh, God, I hate all of that shit. I will say Bachelor does feel a bit culty. Yeah. Even the outside world of it with like Bachelor Nation and people, they all hang, they only hang out with each other. And like it turns into this whole thing. Right. But I feel like that's reality TV in general.

I feel like it's all a bit, it's just manipulative. right it's manipulating people and it's it's a freaky thing but i'll do it again i would i would host again i wouldn't do the show again in your book you talk about sexing with a governor can we talk about that governor quomo during covid i was very turned on by him sexually really yes and i went on the view to declare my love for him and what happened how did it end i would like to be penetrated by the governor of new york i just wanted to put it out there into the ether of like you know so that he would hear yeah and and he heard about it and then he called me and then we flirted and sexted and texted.

Not sexted. I mean sexed. I never do that. What is sexting? I guess eat my pussy. Like, I guess that's sexting or like, I want to suck your dick. I don't know. I don't do that. I don't really do that anyway. That's not my style. I'm not putting shit like that into writing so that Elon Musk can hack my phone and spread it all over the world. I know. But no, it was very fun. It was a total Chelsea story because I always get myself into situations that are either really hard to get out of or I've been extricated.

my sister has this theory that she thinks my mom, my dead mother, is upstairs in heaven just making sure I don't get canceled. Like, she's basically working double time. She's like Chris Jenner up there. Yeah. My mom's acting like Chris Jenner in heaven. And she's basically walking around making sure I don't fuck up my life. And my sister's like, you're requiring too much of mom's time.

Like, mom, I want my dead mother around. And I'm like, I feel mom around me all the time. She's like, I bet you do. And I'm like, I think that's really funny. That's how you think mom is spending her time in heaven by. cock blocking me on the ground. Like, okay? That's a very interesting perspective.

But you do feel her around? I do sometimes. Not recently, but I guess I always kind of feel my mom around. But, I mean, it's funny. My mom passed away and I, like, have a closer relationship with her now than when she was alive. Interesting. I was always closer to my mom, but I was always super independent.

So, like, I was never, unless I was, like, you know, eight years old. I just kind of grew up very fast. When you have five brothers and sisters, you know, I started running my own business when I was like eight years old. I had a hard lemonade stand and I made a lot of money. Yeah. And then when I was 10, I had a babysitting company and I lied. I said I was 15 because I was looked older and I was only 10.

But and I ended up babysitting for a 14 year old boy that whole summer. Stop. Yeah. So I was very entrepreneurial. You always have been. Like at 8 you wanted to create your own lemonade stand. Like it wasn't your parents being like, you should do this to work. Are you kidding?

I was just like, where's the alcohol? I want to do a hard lemonade stand. I want to serve gin, whiskey and tequila if I'm going to make any sort of profit margin. And my parents are like, you can't sell alcohol. It's illegal. I'm like, okay, anyway. I didn't listen to it. I just wanted, I knew my family and I were not on the same page.

Like, I had big ideas and big plans and they were not part of those plans. They're in my life now because I can't shake them because of my brothers and sisters and all of the kids that they have procreated. Yeah. So I have, you know, a huge family and I love them. But I knew right away, like the lifestyle that I was born into wasn't going to cut it. Right. Well, it's funny that you say your mom's up there doing PR because your company is

always kind of push boundaries, which I always think for comedians, I was so scared for them when everybody got so sensitive because I feel like everybody was getting canceled and this and that. But I feel like you balance this act of like edgy with evolving humor. Like you're able to evolve with the humor and social norms. I feel like you're able to do that. How do you think you do that? Like how do you get away with it and why do other people get canceled so quickly? Well, A, I don't think, I don't have the same viewpoint that all these comedians who are complaining about cancel culture have.

A, it's nice to know if you're hurting someone's feelings. Right. It's nice to learn and not do that or not discriminate against a group of people who are already, you know, are in a community that are being targeted. Right. It's nice to respect people's boundaries. It actually makes you more clever and makes you smarter as a comedian. if you can respect other people's boundaries. So I welcome any notes.

I am, you know, I'm always willing to understand that I may have not acted with the best integrity and that I can do better, but maintain like a loving kindness while you're being funny, you know? That's not an issue, like, for me. I am edgy and I am, you know, harsh and loud and all of the things that have been attributed to me at one time or another, I have been all of those things. but that doesn't make me, I don't have to worry about what I'm saying because I'm not an asshole. Like I don't have to go, oh God, don't, I'm going to get canceled.

No, I'm not going to get canceled because I'm not an idiot. Yeah, that's a good point. You're smart and funny and you're a good person. My mom always was worried and actually certain friends are like, I can't believe you haven't been canceled yet because I say what I think and I say what's on my mind. And I'm like, it's the same thing. I'm like, I'm not a dick. I'm not a complete idiot who doesn't know what she's. saying and like we'll make like a comment that is inappropriate oh I make a lot of inappropriate jokes

but I feel like you know you still know right and wrong it's okay as long as it's not crossing a line you know where you're not sexually harassing someone right diminishing someone's you know feelings or like personhood does the balance for you just come naturally with comedy to be able to do both kind of yeah I mean I'm very self-effacing so like when you start out making fun of yourself you can make fun of people. Yeah. And it doesn't, I don't want to say gentle because that's not like, I'm my comedy isn't gentle. It's, it's, it's my person. Now, I'm telling all of my stories. Like, that's my, that's my style. I'm a storyteller. When I write my books, they are stories. When I do my stand-up, I'm telling stories. That's what I'm good at. Yeah. So when you're, when you're

telling stories, it's easy to figure out how to like, you know, find the punchline or make the joke about you or, you know, make the joke about someone else without tearing them a new asshole. You know what I mean? Unless they are an asshole and then they deserve to be torn a new asshole. You know what I mean? There are people out there that deserve it. Absolutely. And you do such a good job at that too. Okay. I feel like things change for me when I turn 30. I know that's weird, but I really think that when I turn 30, I will always say yes to dessert. And baked by Melissa makes it way too easy to say yes because these bite-sized cupcakes are tiny but mighty with the perfect little balance of cake-filling, icing, and topping in every single bite you know how important ratio is with cupcakes.

They nail it. They're my go-to for a lot of gifts, but most importantly, my Valentine's Day gift because they work for everyone. Your partner, your Galentines, your coworkers, your kids, your teachers, your family, your friend's family, even the work party where like maybe you don't want to overthink it. My friend brought a couple boxes to her holiday party last month and the very first thing. That was gone. No crumbs left. You know how I know? Because I went to the holiday party. It was at Indy for skincare and I was there and I ate them. Baked by Melissa's ships fast arrives perfectly

fresh and you can choose your delivery date, which is huge when you're trying to nail Valentine's Day timing. Plus they have something for everyone with gluten-free vegan no-nut options so nobody feels left out. And right now Baked by Melissa is offering our listeners 20% off your order at Bakedbymelissa.com slash vine. That's baked by Melissa.com slash vine for 20% off your order. Baked by Melissa.com slash vine. Let's talk about the old over-the-shoulder boulder holders for a second. That's a bra. Because why is it that anything labeled push-up usually means that you're counting down the minutes until you can take it off?

Well, Nix officially figured it out. You know I already love Nix, K-N-I-X for their leak-proof undies, but they just launched their first wireless push-up bra. I got it in red. Sexy. And I'm honestly impressed. It's called the uplift bra. I said red, but it's actually the cutest cherry red. It's like a really bold red for Valentine's Day. And yes, it's as good as it sounds because it lifts, it shapes, it looks sexy, all without wires digging in or that end of the day discomfort. The molded cups with built-in foam panels really just give you that natural lift. But it's still really comfortable enough to wear all day. Like I do forget that I'm wearing a pushout bra, which never happens, truly. And it's because it's Nix. The sizing is incredible from 28A to 42E, so everyone can actually find their perfect fit. And whether you're dressing up for Valentine's Day, Galantines, or just want a bra that makes you feel good without suffering for it,

head to Nix.com, and please grab yourself the uplift bra. It's amazing, and this may just change your bra game for good. So don't forget to use Code Vine 15 for 15% off your order. That's K-N-I-X.com. Code Vine-15. Happy shopping. You were one of the only, you were the only female late night host for years. Looking back, what do you think your biggest challenge was that you faced as being the only

woman in that industry? I didn't find it challenging. I honestly did not. I didn't think about me as myself as being the only woman. That was only a question that everyone asked me all the time that I was like, what, as if I want everyone to listen to this. Like as if being in that position, having my own late night show, shooting at five days a week, as if I have time to think about what it's like to be the only woman, as if I have time to go,

I wonder if Jimmy Fallon or Jimmy Kimmel or Jimmy, Jimmy, whatever. Like, why would I be doing that? I'm having a good time shooting a show. We're laughing our asses off. It was never an issue for me. In fact, it was probably easier because I stood out because I was the only woman. Yeah. So I remember being asked that question so many times during my, I think it was seven years I was on E.

And I always was like, I'm not thinking about that, you guys. It's not a competition for me. I guess I was just more thinking like did people in that space treat you differently. I mean, I was on the E network. So it's not like, you know, there was a lot of, I also was dating the president of E, you know, after the first like few months of being there. And my, the guy that was that I was dating the president, he was the person who, it was. originally hired me for a show before Chelsea lately. I did like a short-lived show called The Chelsea Handler Show.

And then we turned it into Chelsea lately because that show wasn't successful. And it was more like sketch. Yeah. So they were like, you should do your own job. And then so he and I got together and he, I would just argue anytime there was any fight, I would just, you know, I had no problems going straight to the top and being like, I'm not, I'm going to say this. Bleak me out.

Like this show is funny because we do say, you know, like it's ridiculously inappropriate. Believe us. It's so fun. And, you know, I would win a lot of arguments because it was my boss, but I would have to have, like, arguments with standards and practices. But I didn't, no, I didn't get treated differently that I know of. But again, that's focusing on what other people are doing with me. I'm focusing on what I'm doing with myself. I'm not worried about if they're treating me differently because I wouldn't know the difference.

Right. God, I want to be you when I grow up. I want to talk about your podcast, dear Chelsea. What is the most unexpected advice you've given on your podcast and did it work? out. I've given a lot of advice on my podcast. I went to therapy for two years, hardcore, and I learned a lot. And I went to someone who's cost a lot of money that I know most people wouldn't be able to afford. And so when I got out of therapy, I wanted to share all of my learnings with every person that would listen. I was like, listen, I learned so much about my

personality. I learned so much about, you know, being gentle and being empathetic and being versus being compassionate and actually being too harsh and understanding how you come across, that I just wanted to like apply that, you know? And so I started my podcast, you know, when they gave me a podcast deal. I was like, I'm not doing a podcast. Everyone's doing podcasts. What am I going to do? I'm not going to interview celebrities. Like, I'm not interested. I just did that for 10 years. Right. First on E and then on Netflix. And then I was like, oh, I really love talking to regular people. I was like, oh, maybe we should do like a Dear Abby where people call in. And I'm very unfiltered as anyone who knows me knows. And I'm objective

because I'm not involved in these people's lives. So when they call in for questions or advice, I'm very straightforward. And I'm very like. So what was the most unexpected? I guess one of the first callers that called in in the beginning of the podcast, which was like three years ago or four years ago, was looking to take a break from smoking pot. He's like, I smoke too much pot. And I love smoking pot.

And he was like, I just am smoking too much. And there's a fine line. Like when you overdo anything, it's just no longer fun. Right. And so I said, oh, let me do a challenge with you. I'll take 30 days off. You take 30 days off and get your head clear because he's like, my roommates all smoke pot.

Like I just feel like my life isn't where it I want it to be. I'm depressed. It's making me more depressed, creating anxiety. So he quit for 30 days. And at the end of the 30 days, he moved out of his apartment, came out as trans to his parents and transitioned. Nice. And he's like, yeah, that was like so intense. I mean, I didn't know when I gave him the advice.

I'll do a 30-day break with you. Well, let's chat in 30 days and see what happened. Right. And he revealed all of that. And, you know, like so he was smoking. all that pot to avoid his feelings, to avoid having to talk to his family, to avoid his truth. And I don't know why I had to take 30 days off of a pot, but, you know, the sacrifice was worth it. I think I did more like 28. You know what I mean? I didn't quite make it. But I did it. It's

pretty good. I did it in the spirit of like, you've got a buddy and me. I'm going to be your big sister in this moment. I will help you. And let's figure out the truth. Like what is the truth? What is going on with you? And so that was really like gratifying and moving to know about and hear about. And yeah, we get a lot of notes of people who are like, thank you so much. Like, you know, if you need to get out of a relationship, sometimes you just need someone that doesn't know you to tell you. Yeah, I agree with that. Also, this triggered my memory for smoking weed last night.

I took, I was in New York. I got these edibles. It was to sleep last night. It did the opposite for me. Oh. I hate that. The guy was like, I take two. And I was like, I'm going to take half and just see how I feel.

And then I'll take the other half. I ate all of my hotel snacks, like the cookies, the beef jerks. turkey, the everything that was in that snack, the half bottle of wine. I was like, everything tastes so good right now from half a gummy. Yeah. And did you go to sleep after you ate all that? Yeah. Oh, well, then it worked. But it was like two hours after. Yeah, but you know, you have to say to yourself, I listen, I have this problem with edibles because I love edibles and I can't really smoke because my throat gets weed. I'm wheezy right now because I had one hit off of a joint this weekend in Vegas. I was, I have a residency there, so I was performing. She's amazing. And I was like,

go give me a hit of weed and my cousin looks at me every time I do this. She's like, please don't. You're going to be wheezing for the next two days. And you could even hear it in my voice to say. I'm like, so I can't really smoke that much pot. Even though I love smoking pot, I do take edibles. But I always say this to myself. And this helps and it works.

For anyone who's listening who loves edibles, when you take an edible, first of all, I always take them after I eat so that I don't want to eat. That won't stop me. But you also have to say, don't be a pig after you eat this edible. You're going to be high and don't be a pig. And for some reason, that works. I wish that worked for me because I was saying it before.

I was saying it during. I was saying it when I wanted to go back for like fifths of the cookies. Like I was like, this is disgusting. I know. But that's when you don't, you have to have the intentional when you take cannabis. You have to know that you're going to want to do that and you're going to get the munchies. It's very unusual to not get the munchies when you have an edible. Oh, it, well, when I was, I think I was like 25, 26 living in Vancouver and I went through the smoking weed face. They had really good weed in Vancouver. I got all my best drugs in Canada. Yeah. Oh, 100%. And I would lay out a veggie tray. Like I would just, but I would just go from

different veggies because I knew I was going to be a pig otherwise. And then you wanted vegetables when you were high? I didn't, but that's what I would choose to stuff my face with. Oh, well, that's smart, I guess. Yeah, but you can't do that in a hotel at one in the morning when there's. No, with crudite. No, you can't. I couldn't. There's so many delicious. Okay, you talked about your residency. That cosmopolitan, right? Cosmopolitan, yes, the Chelsea. I perform at the Chelsea. I'm Chelsea at the Chelsea. It's called Chelsea at the Chelsea.

How does that feel to have a residency in Vegas? It's awesome. It's so fun. I mean, it's not your traditional residency. I perform once a month. So I'm like there in January. I'm in there in March. I'm there. You know, I do like on big holidays. And it's for the next two years. So every time I go, we make it like an event and I bring out like friends or family, you know. And we go, we have fun. We gamble. And we make like a night or a weekend out of it. Wait, that's ideal to just go once a month. Yeah, totally.

So do you live in L.A.? And so that's also really close. That's so fun. Chelsea, add the Chelsea once a month. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, yeah. That's, I want to come watch. Come anytime.

How long is it for? Like, when does it, the residency end or is the... It's like two years. Yeah. That's awesome. I know. It's so fun. Oh, my gosh.

Do you, how do you recharge your batteries? Oh, my God. You don't even know. I mean, I am at the end of my rope right now. Oh, shit. I am at the end of the end. end of my rope. Thank you for being here. Of course. No, but I had a good night's sleep. Like, A, it's the sleep is the most key ingredient for me. Like, I need to always, and I'm just,

you know, sometimes you're burning at both ends. And it's hard. It's hard to like, but I take long breaks. Like, I, you know, I take a month off. And then I go on tour for, I'll be doing a European tour this year. Oh, wow. That's huge. I'll do that for probably six weeks straight. And then I will take two months off. Like, I'm very good about going to Whistler or going to Myorka. or going on vacation. And that is as important to me as working. You know, I work really hard so that I can relax really hard. Yeah, but you've worked hard to get to that point that you can do that.

Yeah, like I hustle so hard to get that month off. Yeah. That by the end of the hustle, I'm ready to like, you know, take a bunch of Xanax and sleep for a week. Sounds like a dream. I need to get into like my hyperbaric chamber for like two weeks and just Michael Jackson in it. Is that what like your downtime when you're doing that month off?

Like what does a day look like? Skiing. Yeah. I ski, ski, ski, you know, and have, I have a ton of, like a group of friends up there. And it's just chill. Ski, appre. Margaritas, chill. Bed early, up early.

All of that. You've been like really candid about your love and heartbreak. But what is the biggest misconception people have about you and relationships? I don't know what they would think. I mean, I don't know what people think about me in relationships. Okay, well, just what's the, maybe what's the biggest misconception about you? you in general. But that's me associating with other people's thoughts of me. So you would have to tell me what people think about me because I'm not that invested in it. That's the best answer I could

possibly ask for. I love that. Like what? I mean, I don't know what people think about me. This is why you're an inspiration online because I want to get to that point. You will. I promise. Really? Yeah. You will. It's just age. Well, yeah. Listen, everyone's dealt a card. Like we all have reservoirs of resilience and confidence. and hopefulness and optimism within us. It's just a matter of whether or not we choose to go and get like tap into that or we choose to listen to all the negative thought patterns we have and all the insecurities. And once you learn how to stop thinking about the negativity and start focusing on the positivity,

it's not that big of a contest, which part of yourself you listen to. Having all these negative thoughts about yourself, repeating them to yourself, having low self-esteem, not having a good self-image isn't doing you any favors. Right. You can fake it until you make it. You can act like you're successful before you're successful. I believe that works. I believe you can act like you have confidence before you have confidence.

And eventually you'll have confidence. Yeah. So all of it is just like there's like a big metaphysical aspect to it to actually having like, you know, good energy and being a proponent of good energy and making sure, you know. And listen, not everybody can be positive 24 hours a day. I certainly cannot. Yeah. But I know now myself enough to know when I have to withdraw and when I need to be alone to recalibrate. You know, if I'm going to do three shows in a weekend, which happens very frequently,

by the end of the three shows, I'm sapped. You know what I mean? I'm sapped. I've given, expended so much energy. There's thousands of people at my shows. You know, I want to make sure everyone's having a good time. So sometimes, you know, it's harder, but you also have to identify when you have something to give and when you don't.

And when you don't, that's okay. you just need to like rest, sleep and store it back up. The thing that actually helps me, and I've talked about this before, is my assistant has my schedule for my period. And I do not even ask me to do anything five days before it. Like I need to be in bed during it. And that's actually been really helpful to somewhat find some balance. To know why you're in a mood or why, yeah, to identify what the problem is.

Because I get, I have PMDD and PCOS and it's just like, you're looking at me. Are you a person of color? What is PCOS? It's like polycystic, ovary, something. But I have like major fibroids and like it's so painful. Oh, sorry. No, it's, I'm like, it is what it is. But it is so I like black out from pain sometimes.

Oh, God. Yeah, it's terrible. And then I also on top of it get like horrible hormonal depression. And so it's just like a double whammy of being in pain, can't get out of bed. and like intrusive thoughts. It's awful. It's awful. It's just clockwork every month. I'm like, here we go again. Oh, sorry. You should get an ablation.

What will that do? Do you want children? I'm not sure yet. Oh, well, then you can't get an ablation. I got one. An ablation stops your period. So you're unilining. You don't get the cramps and the fibroids would tamp down a lot.

So you don't bleed every month. You don't get a period, which obviously is ideal. Yeah, yeah. You know, especially if you're planning on not having children because you, you, I mean, it's not 100% sure you won't get pregnant again, but you most likely won't. Really? So you can't bleed.

So like that whole, you know, where all your cramps come from and all of that. So you don't get cramps or anything like that. No. No. Do you get like any hormonal like imbalances? I'm sure. Something's wrong.

But, you know, like I can feel my boobs getting swollen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm like, I know I'm getting a period. Right. Because I'm sure I'm in perimenopause of 49. No, I've never dealt with what you've dealt with, though, because that sounds really nightmarish. It's so awful being a woman sometimes, you know.

Like, I mean, I can't believe we're expected to get our periods and deal with that. Like, are you kidding? It's so gross having to deal with that every month. It's awful. And it's the fact that it's not even every month. It's like every 23 days. It's just absolutely terrible.

So I always make my guests do some sort of confession with an embarrassing story. But have you ever had anything embarrassing happen on stage to you? I mean, I once had explosive diarrhea. I was performing. But this isn't embarrassing because there is something about getting on stage that pauses, your adrenaline takes over. And it puts whatever ailment you are dealing with or whatever malady you're up against,

it puts a pause on it. Yeah. So I was like, there's no way I'm going to make it through my set. I'm on stage for at least an hour every night. And I'm like, I'm never going to make it. And then I was just like, okay, well, I have no choice. I'm going up there. And I was like, oh, and the minute I got off, my ass exploded again.

So your body knows. Your body knows. Like, put it on pause, bitch. Okay. You're a professional. That's so true. I really do feel it. I've seen some, like, Fergie, didn't she peer pants during the, like, National Anthem?

So weird. Yeah, yeah. I guess, yeah. You really have to time that, right? I don't know. But that's just kind of being an adult, do like maybe be before you go. I don't know. What is the biggest oops I shouldn't have said that moment on TV for you?

Oh, I out my boyfriends a lot on TV. Like, I forget that their stories are theirs, you know, too. I always think I'm talking and I'm like, oh, I'm telling my story. Right. and I don't realize it incriminates other people. So I was on Jimmy Fowell, or no, I was on Andy Cohen's radio show and I was talking about my boyfriend, Ted Harbert, the one from E. Yeah.

He was asking if I had ever done threesomes. And I was like, oh, yeah, Ted and I used to do them all the time. We had a masseuse that would come over. She was awesome. And then I knew it was time to break up when I started calling the masseuse when he was out of town. And he was like, oh, my God. You know, and I was like, I forgot I even did that show. Like, three hours later I was out to dinner with my friends.

Like, I just didn't even think about it. Yeah. And then the next morning I was walking or the next afternoon, I knew, I was in New York City, and I was walking and meet some friends for brunch. And my phone is blowing up, blowing up, like, vibrating. And I'm walking and I had this Apple's stupid watch on that never works. And I was like, what? You know, and I, and then I saw a text from Ted Harbert or an email from Ted Harbourn.

And he said, please don't ever do that again. Some things are private. Oh, no. And I was like, what's he talking about? I was like, that's a pretty stern email to get from my ex. Yeah. And then I was like, what could he? I was like, racking my brain sitting there on like Fifth Avenue,

going what what did I do where have I been recently and I was like did I say something publicly and then I was like I googled myself yeah and it's like Chelsea Handler talks about having threesomes with ex-boyfriend and why she left him for the masseuse I'm so bad then I went on Jimmy Fallon like a few months later and I was like hey I want to clear up that story about Ted Harbour because Jimmy Ted was Jimmy Supposed at one point too and then I ended up just doubling down I was like listen the breakup wasn't because of the masseuse but we definitely had a good time and I go and quite frankly, I'm giving him a lot of street cred because nobody would have ever guessed that Ted Harbert was doing three subs. So why don't you go fuck yourself, Ted?

And then the next morning I got an email from Ted and he goes, thanks, I think, question mark. So yeah, I do that shit. Like, you know, that's a bad habits to break, an old habit to break, because I'm such a truth teller that I always forget. Sometimes I can't tell other people's stories. They're not just mine. I've been having a lot of grounding moments recently. I just feel like when I'm outside or sitting in the sauna or working out and listening to music, reading, just slowing down and being present really reminds me of how important it is for me to actually take care of myself, especially when it comes to what I'm putting in my body. I've been very intentional about that lately, especially intentional about nutrition. I just feel like I'm caring more about ingredients

and keeping things clean with no fillers, no added nonsense, just fuel that actually feels good in my body. And that is why I love kachava. Okay, it is an all-in-one nutrition shake made with high quality plant-based ingredients, non-GMO, gluten-free, and has no soy or artificial flavors or sweeteners either. It makes taking care of myself just feel a little more simple, I guess, instead of complicated. And since adding it into my routine, I've noticed more steady energy throughout the day, just better digestion, and I just feel more supported after workouts.

I actually took it to my trainer to look at the ingredients. He was like, yeah, and then I think he might get it for his wife. I'll say this. It actually tastes good, but genuinely taste good. I blend mine with almond milk. little frozen fruit. I usually just do half a frozen banana. I love the chocolate blend. I actually blend it with the strawberry blend, but I also have been trying every other flavor. There's a macho one as well that's so fire. But yes, there are six flavors total, so you can switch it up

depending on your mood. So rewild your nutrition at kachava.com and use code vine. New customers, you're going to get $20 off an order of two bags or more now through the 31st. That's Kachava, K-A-C-V-A-D-com, codevine. Have you ever had a conversation with your partner that got, let's say, messy? Like the kind of makes you kind of step back and go, wow, we really need to talk. That is exactly what Jay Shetty's new Audible original series, messy love. Difficult conversations for deeper connection is all about. Jay takes three couples behind closed doors and guides them toward a deeper understanding of themselves and their relationships.

Now, this isn't about perfect love by any means. It's about practice love. You get to witness real unscripted moments as they work through resentment, broken trust, and generational patterns. So no filters, no scripts, just real growth happening in real time. And the best part is Jay shares tools that you can use too. Communicate with clarity and compassion. Break cycles of blame and withdrawal. Create emotional safety and rebuild trust.

Turn small daily moments into rituals of appreciation. It's raw, it's inspiring, and sometimes even transformational. Listen to messy love, difficult conversation. for deeper connection now on Audible. Go to audible.com slash messy love to start listening today. This episode is brought to you by booking.com. Okay, here is the thing. Travel never a one size fits all.

So what works for one person is definitely not what works for everyone. That's why I love booking.com because they offer a huge variety of hotels and vacation rentals across the U.S. So you can find exactly what you're booking for. Even if the people you're traveling with, let's say maybe impossible to please. Been there. Because maybe you're booking for your partner who needs total darkness and maybe some silence to sleep or your friend who insists on a giant

kitchen because they may or may not cook, but never do. Or honestly, your group chat where everyone has opinions and just zero flexibility. For me, I'm always looking for a place that just feels cozy but elevated. I feel like those are my two go-to words, cozy but elevated. Maybe a separate space to wind down, a good bed and enough room where no one feels like they're on top of each other. The best part is booking.com makes it so easy to filter for exactly that. So no settling, no guessing, and honestly, if I can find the perfect stay on booking.com, anyone can because I'm picky. So find exactly what you're booking for. Booking.com, booking dot yeah. Book today on the site or in the app. Who's someone that you've met who made you think all have what they're having and why?

God, this is a great question because honestly, I want to answer this in a very thoughtful way. Because again, this goes back to really being who you are. Yeah. So if you really are invested in who you are and who you want to be and that whole process, you really don't want to ever be anyone else. You know what I mean? You can look at someone's life and go, oh, I wish I had that or I wish I was doing that. But do you ever want to look at someone and go, I wish I were that person or I wish I was that person? I don't think so.

I don't want girls to think like that. Right. I want girls to see other women do. doing things and going, oh my God, instead of envy. I mean, you can be envious. That's a human emotion. But you don't act on envy. You act on motivation.

Like, that's motivating. I want to live a life like that. I want to be free like her. I want to be, you know, I want to have the outfits or wardrobe she has. So get after it that way. But I don't ever want anyone to try to be other people. I really think like that is what is lacking is our identity. You know, you really have to be invested in yourself.

Like, how am I. going to get to the next best version of me. Yeah. I feel like, yeah, so many people look at others as competition instead of inspiration. And I feel like I always have to kind of like in the moment realize when I'm doing that even myself. And I do it, but I'll be like, I'm aware that I'm doing it. So then I switch it. What is one adventure you'd recommend everyone try at least once? Well, sex with a stranger. Safari. Safari is a great adventure. That's all my bucket. I've been on the safari three times. Best things I've ever, the best trip set. just unforgettable memories and it's so beautiful to see that part of the world.

Yeah. Another adventure. I mean, I love adventure. I love newness and freshness and risk taking and I like to be scared. Yeah. So I like to be scared and then like, you know, walk right into that fear and make things happen. There's just such a rush that comes from that and I'm an adrenaline junkie. So I really, I don't like to be scared where it's debilitating or, you know, I'm shaking or something. Right. But I like to challenge myself and always kind of, you know, do the thing that's a little bit harder.

I feel like you do that a lot with like stepping outside of the comfort zone or the box to get yourself ahead and it always works. Like it always, you know, you always learn something from it or get ahead in some way, whether that be like mentally or physically or professionally. And also it's not just about you. Like I want to say that also to everyone who's listening. Like it's not just about you getting ahead. And, you know, sometimes.

and I write about this in the book, like sometimes you're not the main character in the story. Sometimes you're there for someone else and sometimes you're a character in their story. Yeah. And that's all right too. It's not all about you life. It's about being the best version of yourself

so that you are more accessible and to others and that you are caring and that you actually go out of your way in that way as well for other people, you know? Do you know that you have a good reputation with that? like from people that I know in certain industries, you're a name that comes up always that of just how good of a person you are. Oh, great.

Love that. Love it. And just like how, yeah, it's, you have like a really good reputation. Thank you. Yeah, yeah. I know a lot of people that know you. And everybody was like, oh my gosh, you would love her. She's so herself.

She's so this. She gives to other people. She's very generous. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks. Well, that's because I always, I live with my mother in my mind. You know, what is going to make my mother proud?

My mom was the sweetest. Really? Sweetest person. She was European and she was soft-spoken and she was demure. She's everything that I am not. And so she was like, who is this lightning bolt bitch daughter that I have on my hands? Because I was hell on wheels from the moment I could like form a sentence. I'm like, this is not going to cut it, people.

Oh, my gosh. So whenever I, you know, I always act with my mother in mind because my mom was the sweetest. I love that. What is the wildest thing you've ever done to get ahead? To get ahead? Yeah. I don't try to get ahead like that. These questions, I love asking you because you don't give bullshit answers.

I had a situation once where I was with an old friend and there were two people that needed help. And one of the people that needed help could not do anything for either one of us ever. Yeah. You know, was in a very weak spot, very insecure, very kind of traumatized. And then there was another woman that didn't need our help but could do a lot for us. And me and that girl have never spoken again. Because I stood with the underdog. Yep.

Because that's the right thing to do. Yeah. And she decided to go in a different direction when this was a friend for 20 years. And I just remember looking, thinking, I don't ever want to be a person that tries to get ahead. Yeah. Like, I'm going to get myself ahead. I don't need anybody else to help me do that. And I feel like that's, people with that mentality do get ahead, but it's in a more patient way and in a more authentic way.

Yeah, and you don't, I can sleep at night. Yeah. I'm not for sale, you know what I mean? There's a special place in hell for certain people like that. Like The, like, Bachelor producers always joke. I'm like, how do you sleep? Oh, yeah. Well, that is something other.

That is otherness. Last question is, what is freedom to you? Freedom is skiing down a mountain topless or in a bikini with a joint in one hand, a margarita in my other hand, and a dog on my back. Freedom is riding my bike down the hills of my orca when I'm on vacation with my friend. and we go out for these long, languorous lunches and we have lots of sangria and beautiful fish. And then we ride our bikes home and we ride right into the ocean.

Like I live on this little block and we, and I just feel so free. Like I see, freedom is not having a husband. It is not being tethered to another human being. It is being free that I, so free that I can get on a plane tomorrow and go wherever the hell I want to go. And I don't have to check with anyone. Yeah, I feel that.

Wow. that does sound like freedom. To wrap it up, what's next for you after this book? Are you going to do like a book tour? I'm going to do a book tour. My special will come out on Netflix by the time this airs. That will have been announced. So that will be coming out.

Are we allowed to know what it's called? It's called The Feeling. Okay. That will come out March 25th and this will air probably in February, right? This is going to air on your birthday. Oh, perfect. Well then, yeah, my special will come out next month, a month from today. I have lots of stuff lined up for this year.

I bet you do. I do. It's going to be a busy year. That's great. And then I'm going to do my European tour because I haven't toured Europe in a while. So I feel like that to be able to even just say like a European tour would be my dream. Well, you are amazing. I love to getting to talk to you.

And I'm just like so grateful that you came on this podcast. Pluto TV has thousands of free movies and TV shows. This is the mindset. Free. This is the mantra. This is the movies like Joe Dirk, pixels and 51st dates. This is awesome. And TV shows like.

Survivor, SpongeBob Squarepants, the fairly odd parents and ghosts. Pluto TV is always free. Hazzal. Pluto TV, stream now. Pay never. You're welcome. Hi, I'm Lauren. And I'm Chandler. And we're the host of Pop Apologist Podcast, a weekly podcast devoted to celebrity gossip, Hollywood deep dives, real housewives, drama, and anything and everything, Taylor Swift. We're two sisters who make no apologies for our love of pop culture in the

the fact that A-listers might be more to us than each other. Join us on your favorite podcast app every Wednesday for Pop Apologists. Pop Apologists, your new favorite sister and celebrity podcast.