Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Chrishell Stause: Life Is Not a Disney Movie

Episode Date: February 8, 2022

Reunited and it feels SO good! KB and Chrishell are back together after their summer camp bonding experience last year on Dancing with the Stars, and they have plenty to catch up on. The two are going back in time to talk about Chrishell’s upbringing in Kentucky where she went from a difficult childhood and beauty roadblocks to starring in Days of Our Lives to becoming a real-estate master, ultimately ending up on Selling Sunset. Chrishell shares why she is still “under construction,” how she found her confidence, shifted her idea of the “happy ending,” and why readers (or listeners) will laugh and feel inspired by her new book. We get some soap-opera trivia and real-estate “ken you nots,” and they wrap it up with a dating dealbreaker game where Chrishell decides to “love it” or “list it.” Last but definitely not least, Chrishell spills some serious tea with her confession that reveals what her dating life has looked like recently. Check out Chrishell’s book, Under Construction, and find her on Instagram @chrishell.stause!  EUROPEAN WAX CENTER - Book your reservation today and remember, your first wax is free! OURA RING - Go to OuraRing.com to claim yo ur BOGO $50 offer, and get a free sizing kit today. ADOREME - Shop intimates now on AdoreMe.com.  BOLL & BRANCH - Experience the best sheets you’ve ever felt at bollandbranch.com and get 15% off your first set of sheets when you use promo code vine15 at checkout. PROGRESSIVE - Get a quote today at Progressive.com.  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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it up let's go hey ramen pinot ready for the show everyone's welcome so come on in because It's about to begin. Hello, welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. Kay Vino's, I'm still on the road. It's busy, it's crazy. Podcasting is a bit of a challenge, but I love it so much.

I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep giving you people what you want. And today I get to chat with sweetest gal of all time. She's so damn sweet. She is so well-spoken. She's just a precious little human being with a good head on her shoulders.

Honestly, so many of you just wanted me to tell her that she seems so real, genuine, and sweet. And it's Chris Lesthouse, who just released her book called Underconstruction. So she gives us some fun insider details and sneak peeks into what she's written in her book. It's about relationships, her career, how she's just like an ongoing project like under construction. We find out what soap opera life was like, how she landed in the world of real estate, selling sunset, as well some very, very real details on growing up homeless at times spilling some tea on her first experience of getting back into the dating game. It has to do with her confession, and it's pretty funny.

She's an open book, and I cannot wait to read her book to learn more. Just, I just love real, and she's one of them. Hi. Hello. Hi. Oh, my gosh. You're so freaking gorgeous. dress that I always look like a toe.

Oh, my, you've, oh, my God. Okay, you're crazy. You look amazing and I'm so happy to see your face. Oh my gosh, I'm so happy to see you. I have been thinking about you because I'm like, could you imagine if you were on the tour of us with me for this dancing with the stars tour, how fun that would be? We would have so much fun. Are you having the best time?

Are you sore in every single or like place? I'm not. And I'll tell you why. because it's so different from the experience, as you know, on Dancing with the Stars, everything hurts and you're just like every day just grinding to the max. But this is so different because I'm doing like two dances that I already knew. And so it's not like hours and hours of rehearsal. It's more hosting moments for me and then going out and doing dances that I already know.

So I'm like, it's definitely not as intense as the show. But I don't know how the other dancers are doing it. because, I mean, their body's built for this, but they go out there and do like, like, Danielle's in like 20 numbers and she's just like, like, breathing so heavy through the whole thing coming off, switching into another costume and getting right back out there.

Like, I'm in there for host moments just so she can have quick changes. It's insane. I don't know how they do it. Well, I can't wait to see you. I'm totally coming when you guys are, I think you're coming to, I just looked it up, Topanga Canyon or something like that.

Yes. Oh my gosh. You have to come. It's just so much fun. Obviously we like we've podcasted before. So some things people will already know. But just to like refresh people's memories. Obviously you were on Dancing with the Stars. Gleb was your partner. Did you say this? I think you did that you made it further than you thought you were going to. I did. I mean, I was just trying. You know, initially I was like I don't want to get kicked off first. Please just don't let me first. You know. And then of course as it goes, then you really get sucked in and you start to think and you know and you just you never want to leave you know and so by the end of it of course it was heartbreaking but then when I look at where I started and what my goal was I'm like oh my gosh I went so much further than I thought yeah you were so fun to watch just because you had no dance experience and some of us did and like I've been like this last season so many of them had dance experience you had none and it was so fun to watch you going from like not being able to do like three steps like you know to being able to actually do turns and lifts and moves where I was like get it girl I tried no you're so good and for me when I see where I ended I'm like wow I can't

believe I did that you know but then when you put it in context to what some of the people were doing it was like yeah I get it it was time for me to go I wanted you to stay long what do you think the hardest part of your experience on dancing with the stars was besides dancing obviously picking up side but like like the most challenging thing for you i think you know what's weird this seems like the probably the simplest thing but my toes do not i don't have a natural arch yeah and so it is really extremely hard for me to point my toe the way that some people's feet just go naturally yeah and i even when i'm doing it instead it start you know and it's like there's a an elegant way to do it and mine just look like i'm like crunching my toes together yeah and

club is like that is not what I'm saying not that I know because they always want you to point your toes and if your toe doesn't point you're in trouble especially in those heels it's hard to point your toe in heels yeah so I think I mean I know that's like the simplest dumbest thing but for whatever reason I just I can't I could never get that right I think it's because I don't have an arch in my foot I'm very flat foot that's okay you're killing it and what you're supposed to be doing right now and you don't need to dance it was fun while it lasted but do you and uh you and glad still keep in touch right your friends yeah yeah he was the one saying you have to come see the show so i was like i'm amazing there's no way i'm so excited

you're in the show i would not miss it i can't wait glib kills me we were doing a q and a the other day and people were asking like what's your story how did you get on dancing with the stars and everyone had like you know these stories of all their hard work and they moved from like russia or they you know like had been dancing since they were two and they had to go through this like intense audition to get on dancing with the stars. Do you know Gleb's story about how he got on? How he got on, I remember him telling me how he got into dance, but I don't think I remember how he got on Dance with the Stars. His interview, they walked in, he walked in and sat down and like other people's interview consisted of like they had to take someone from the front desk

who'd never dance before and in 15 minutes teach them a dance. And then they had to talk to them for like an hour on camera and do like certain things. Glebs sat down and they said, Why should you be on dancing with the stars? And his response was, because I'm sexy. That's so on brand. That's very, very, very him. I'm not shocked, but that's hilarious. He just said, because I'm sexy.

And they said, okay. And then he got the job. And then he had to go through, like, dancing after that. But he'd already, like, gotten the job. I just died laughing when he said that because that exactly what you said. It's like so glub. And we were doing, like, photo. with people for VIP experience, and, you know, girls were like, oh, he's just so handsome and blah, blah.

And I think Kiki said something to him, like, how do you not just have the biggest head with everyone complimenting you? And he goes, well, I've been dealing with this for 35 years of my life. He's such a dog. He does. He does have him again. I mean, that's why we love him. Exactly. He's ridiculous and hilarious at the same time. He's so, he's so funny and he's just so harmless. like he's just so lovable at the same time it's hilarious anyway oh i hope you come see the show

and that's so nice that you too still keep in touch i mean that was another thing at the q and a people are talking about how they stay close with their dance partners because you just get into such a relationship full of ups and downs and you really see each other at your best and worst and then you can't help but like stay close with them afterwards so yeah it's a truly a bonding experience i felt the same way with you it's like we didn't get to spend a ton of time because of the COVID situation and they you know but it really is a bonding experience I feel like it was like summer camp we all did summer camp together and you want to you know it's you'll never forget that memory in that time so true and I just like everybody was rooting for each other and it was just so nice

you're right it was like a summer camp but we all just bonded over I wish we could have like I mean you and I had dinner or a couple nights or like hung out after but it would have been so nice if we could have the experience the other because now I can see it firsthand on being on a bus with everybody like they're all so close and they're such deep human beings like the conversations that go on on the bus I'm like holy shit it's it's like so nice and I'm like if we could all have hung out during our season it would have been you know even crazier okay vinos it's almost that time to celebrate your loved ones and celebrate yourself and this valentine's day let's flip the script on the day of love and celebrate all the important relationships in your life

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sisters? I can't remember the exact. Yes. Good memory. Yes. I do. Okay. Wow. Thank you. I just want to know kind of a bit about growing up in Kentucky, like a day in the life, because it's so foreign to me being Canadian. Everywhere I go, like, I discovered new things. Being in the south now in Nashville, I, you know, everyone's lifestyle is just so different growing up. But it was it such a small town life for you? Did you travel a lot growing up? Or like, how did you gather your more worldly outlook and set up yourself to do like such, have such big dreams? I definitely, we definitely didn't travel. I mean, I knew my little gravel road. It was a very rural area. So I think sometimes if, if no one knows anything about me and they're meeting me for the first time and I say,

Kentucky, you know, I've had this happen many times where they're picturing, you know, Louisville or, you know, this, you know, pageants and plantations and all these things. And it couldn't be further from that. And all those things are there, but that's not where I'm from. Yeah. And so it was just, you know, I read a lot of books. I watched soap operas. I basically, you know, from reading, realized there's like this whole huge world out there that clearly I didn't know anything about. And then of course, You know, just from like watching soaps, you know, I idolize those girls. I want to do that. So I thought this idea to like go move to the big city. That's amazing. So you, so from like a young age or at least like old enough to be watching soaps, but a young age, you had those dreams and aspirations to be a soap opera actress. Yeah, my mom and my grandma watched it religiously.

They called it their stories, you know, and they were just the most glamorous women I'd ever seen. So I just I idolize them, you know, and clearly being, you know, the very very unpopular kid and a lot of beauty roadblocks in my way growing up

I had to work through and, you know, learn how to get rid of facial hair, random facial hair, and you know, just a rogue tooth that stuck out and was very, you know, I got, I figured it out, but it took me a while. But anyway, it was a

it clearly was the furthest thing from when I was watching them from what I was living. So it makes sense that I was like, you know, but it really stuck in my head as a goal. And so that was, I went to college. I was like, I didn't say I wanted to be an actor. I said I wanted to be a soap star, you know. So that was like always in my head, I think just because, you know, I wanted to impress. I think that's in there, I'm sure, my mom, my grandma, you know. For sure.

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Now, I know, I'm sure a lot of people know this story, but like, When you go back and you talk about your little beauty roadblocks, I would love to see you as a kid. I think you'd be adorable. But like you grew up at, can you say, is it homeless or did you have, where did you live? I don't know the like exact wording and details. Yeah. But I know you've talked about this before.

So my parents, you know, they struggled with different things with addiction and, you know, mental illness, depression, certain things. And so there were some times where they'd be really good. and then there were other times and they would not be. And, you know, my mom would just always try and find odd jobs here and there. My dad worked as a mechanic, but we are in a very rural area, you know, that's not like a ton of work. So there were more than a few times where we didn't, you know, we'd get evicted and we'd be homeless or we'd live out of the car. We'd, you know, go to a cousin's house or something, you know, always kind of just going wherever.

It wasn't all so it just depended. It wasn't always like that. like I had a year where we lived with my dad's boss and he had a really nice house. In my head, it was like, wow. Yeah. You know, and I look back at it now and it's, there's nothing fancy about it. But at the time, it was like, oh, my gosh. So, yeah, so it was, it was intermittent.

I was homeless at several points in my life. That probably helps you obviously be who you are as a human being, but remain humble because people probably see you and if they don't know your story or like how you. you grew up. People see a pretty and successful woman and they want to immediately assume that things are handed to you and that you don't work hard and that, you know, like there's always this narrative around a pretty successful woman. And I just like love your story because it must, first of all, it must have been challenging to grow up and not like how you say the beauty roadblocks. Like that keeps coming back to my head about how you say that. That must have kind of like

messed with your head a bit going into an industry so full of, you know, these glamorous women that you looked up to that have these beauty standards that sometimes seem so unrealistic and to stay true to who you are while also, you know, striving for this look. How did you maintain to stay like humble and true to yourself during that? Well, I mean, you know, growing up with so much, you know, just insecurity and being ashamed of, you know, where I came from and who I was. And really trying to adopt, you know, a new persona. I decided to go by my middle name.

I'm not hurrying, you know, I went by my first name, Tarina. And then in college, I was like, okay, I have a clean slate. I get to start over. My name's Chris Shell now. Okay, in college, I had to go get, I started looking at what's on TV and what I looked like in the mirror. My hair was cut to here in one of these mushroom cuts. Yeah.

I'd gotten a perm. I had, you know, very, very rogue tooth. So I was like, okay, I'm getting braces. So freshman year of college, you know, so I really used college not as this like I'm prepping. So I started growing my hair out. I did, you know, I was just trying to, I wanted to get those things, whatever I could do to get that out of the way so that I could do the work. Because I really wanted to, you know, do that I'd been doing plays and it just really loved it. And so I just tried to do that.

But then honestly, you know, it is what it is. You, you always have these things going on in your head. you know, especially, you know, that ugly duckling syndrome where it's, you know, it's still, I'm sure that probably never goes away all the, you know, all the way, but it's probably best in this city, you know, you meet some people where you're like, how do you live in like, what does it feel like to be that confident all the time? That must be amazing, you know, so. Well, people probably think that about you. I mean, you, you've obviously grown into who you are of this, you know, in this time of your life. And every year I feel like women or people in general

who work on themselves get more and more confident. But I don't know if you ever fully achieve that every day, all day walking around with confidence. I would like to talk to anyone in the world who, I wonder if there is someone out there. Gleb. Yeah, Gleb. That's a good call. I'm going to get Gleb on the podcast to talk about confidence and like how he walks around every day with confidence like that because I thought I would find that fascinating but I mean besides Glenn he's like one of those exceptions to the rule but it's an industry especially you know Hollywood and the soap operas and the acting and the glamorous lifestyles like I feel like that is probably a lot to live up to at least it would be for me going into that world like same thing with bachelor world like I was

always like I'm not pretty enough to be on the bachelorette or like you know you have this certain way of thinking and then you realize you get somewhere and you're like oh well like yes that girl's beautiful but maybe she's not nice like there's so many other things to women that make them beautiful but it's just interesting in the Hollywood and acting world in my opinion the pressure and the standards of beauty to be in that world and I think also it's one of those things you know as you get older and you find like I found a lot of confidence in my abilities you know once I you know what really excelled in you know the soap world and now that I've really excelled and really say I find a lot of confidence with that and that helps

everything. Yeah. And, you know, so I think that it's also, you know, being nice to yourself and not letting yeah, you know, as I've gotten older, you know, not letting those kind of doubts, you know, of course we're going to have them, but not letting them take up real space. And it's just like that mental exercise of self-care, I think. Yeah, absolutely. It's a everyday thing. And obviously you have more than your looks. You're so smart. You're killing it in the real estate industry. You're writing books. You, I still, people, when I was on the Off the Vine Facebook page, like everyone loved your time on days of our lives. So we got a lot of days fans out there in the Off the Vine world, which is so cute because I was all growing up. My gosh, Carrie in Austin for life.

Yeah. Agreed. Same. But for those listening who don't know, which character did you play and what was their persona? So I played Jordan Ridgeway, who initially came to town. you know, as a very trying to blend in personal. She basically was helping Rafe recover. She was a physical therapist, scrubs, glasses, you know, whatever.

And then over the course of the years, you know, she started to, all of a sudden, she's in sequins and she's, you know, gotten comfortable in this town. She's no longer in hiding. Then I left the show and came back with a head injury from a car accident as one does on a soap. It knocked to the crazy loose. And then I got to go on a crazy spree and kidnapping babies and poisoning cupcakes and trying to kill people. And now when I come back, I am a, I've died and I come back as a ghost that is my brother's guilty conscience. It is awesome.

Wow. It's so fun. There's like never ending roles in soap operas. There's so many twisted turns and like you could die but then still be part of the show. Like I remember when everybody in Salem was dying, but they all went to this like one area where they were still a lot. it was like a full like the season of lost is what it felt like and I remember I remember watching it just being like there's so many ways this can go and it's so funny because I couldn't believe how many people were fans of days in in the Facebook group so they wanted to give you a little

trivia oh okay let's do it oh no and I was like laughing out loud while I was writing this quiz just because I was really into days of our lives and I like knew the answers and I was like oh my gosh i really was invested in the drama plot twist of days like sands through the hourglass so are the days of our what year did days of our lives first air oh my gosh i know it's um i wouldn't have known this one over 50 years old um i i mean i i can't remember i should probably know but i i'm not going to get this right i don't know i don't think it's something you should probably know

I don't think so. It's a, it's pretty, like, when I saw the answer to this, I was like, are you kidding? It was 1965. Wow. So, yeah, I mean, I knew the show was, you know, I, because I remember when they celebrated 50 years, but I don't remember how many years ago that was or I could have been. Yeah, clearly one of the longest running scripted television programs in the world. That's so crazy. Okay. Which family did days of our lives originally revolve around? I want to say the Demeras is that... No. Okay. What? Oh, my God. Dejure Hall.

What's her character's name? Marlena. I can't think of her last name. Wait, Evans. Oh, but Marlena Evans, right? Is that what it was? Yeah. No, I remember the couple that everyone loves and they're still there and they're...

I'm blanking. The Hortons. Yes. I know you now. Horton Square. How could I forget? You know how many. times I've shot at Fortin Square.

That's like the one of the four sets that we had for all the years I was there. How would I forget that? But I would have guessed the Demetries. I would have guessed that. That would have been my guess. This was the one I knew. What did Bo nickname Hope? What was her nickname?

Fancy face. Yeah. I got one. That was easy. Okay, finally. At least I got one. And they still look the exact same age that they did like 50 years ago. I'm so confused.

I know. Anytime, you know, she would set a drink down, I would just go over and start drinking it. Because I'm like, what is it? What are you doing? Yeah, what's in the water? Let me have some. Oh, that's so incredible.

And then who was the Salem stalker? Okay. I think it was my brother. Robert Scott Wilson. What's his character's name? Ben. Okay, I think there was a few, actually, because this was back in 2003.

Marlena Evans was, but I think there was a few other ones because this was, I just remember in two, I remember this in 2003. A masked serial killer murdered a huge chunk of the show's most beloved characters, but it was brainwashed Marlena. She was brainwashed. Just killing off her friends and neighbors. That's so funny.

I love this side. I like, obviously, Days is one of the more campier ones. I've done some that are, that are a different tone. But I remember some days coming in, you know, and there's hope, sometimes dressed as hope. And then sometimes she's the princess. It was just hilarious. I just feel like with soap opera actors and actresses, like they just eat, sleep and breathe that character for so many years that I'm like, do they have a hard time with their own identity

of like, are they similar, like, not even like obviously the killing and the kidnapping and all that, but like their mannerisms and all that kind of stuff. Is it kind of similar of them in real life? I will say the longest character I played was on all my children. and I was on that show for almost seven years playing Amanda. And it got to where I could truly click in and ad lib like I wouldn't need it. I just knew, I knew at that point, seven years, you know how they would respond to every single situation. And so some of it is that stuff that's your own, you know, like how you speak, how you talk.

But then, of course, you've over the years come up with little landmarks that you've created. So it is interesting that a lot of times the writers, too, will tend to write once they see the actor on the live feed. They'll start to kind of write for them specifically. And so that tends to happen. That's so interesting. All right, Vinos, if you've been listening to the pod, you've probably heard me talking about Adorme lately. They're this amazing, inclusive brand that sells intimates like bras, panties, lingerie, loungeware, and more. And seriously, everything they sell, so pretty and pretty and sexy, too.

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And I won't talk too much about real estate, but I do have a couple questions in this fun segment with guests called Can You Not that I do sometimes where we kind of just bitch about things that you wish people would not do. Like, for example, like can you not ask me when I was engaged to Sean from the show?

like can you not ask when our wedding is like we just got engaged like there's so many things I can you not in the bachelor world um but I wanted to do a real estate addition with you because I mean there's probably so many can you not's like can you not lie and tell me that you aren't working with another agent like there's probably so many like that yeah before we get to that game how did you get into real estate to begin with again I think I know but for people listening and how did you land a spot on selling sunset so I actually was I was on days of our life and they knew writers were brought in and the new writers decided to my character was going to go off to New York and to you know and I got fired and so it was a little you know it was one of those things where I always tell people like sometimes these things that you think suck in the moment are terrible this is the blessing you needed because all of a sudden I was like I need to figure this out I'm tired of living this life where it's like I have to you know put my hopes into what my next job is I want to have some security going forward and so I want to have some security going forward and so I want to went and I got my driver's license.

I went and got my real estate license. And then, of course, once it's the universe, once you're really busy, I'm doing real estate, days of our lives ended up calling me to do to come back. Then all of a sudden selling sunset comes knocking, asking if I'd be willing to switch brokerages and, you know, film it. And so, yeah, that sounds fun. That's, I mean, that's, it's so cool how life leads you in certain directions, you know, just different, different turns in life that you could.

take that can change your whole career and life but okay uh can you not tell me if you have any can you these are ones that i thought of can you not give me your entire list of must haves on a property and then decide to buy something completely different oh yeah that has definitely happened to me yeah can you not reach out and and waste my time when you really just wanted to meet because I would rather just, you know, let's do that, let's meet. But when you, you know, you end up making someone go in circles and chase their tail when you never were going to buy or sell in the first place. Oh, that's a really good, can you not?

I wonder if this is what for you. Can you not think that you're going to get this house for a lot less than everyone else bidding it on it for some reason? Like, do people come in and think because they like know you or they're somebody that they can get a house for less? This is Los Angeles. That's almost all ideal. Oh my gosh. Can you not? Yeah, I get a lot of that. You know, because a lot of these times when I'm working in these multi-million dollars homes, these are the types of people. They're not used to not getting their way. They're not used to being told no. And they don't take it well many times. That's actually, that's got to be really challenging for you because you have to have thick skin to deal with, you know, a lot of these people in that world. And I bet you have some people where they'll tiptoe around like feedback and try and not hurt your feelings. And then there's other people who are just like, no, I get this because this is what I want. Oh, yeah.

I mean, and I have to say like, you know, I've definitely my career is in a much different place than it was because starting out, you know, I wasn't in a place to turn down business. So I ended up, you know, working with people that I would never consider working with now. And that's the gift of getting your business to a place where you're, like, I don't have to do this anymore. You can't speak to me like that. That's not who talks to people like that. So, yes, yes. That's, okay, that's good.

Well, now I have to know just before we switch subjects because I can't wait to talk about your book, but I just have to know what the weirdest thing. And it could be a candy knot or just the weirdest thing you've seen or dealt with in your real estate career. Like, I'm sure you've seen some weird things. I mean, there's one that's just so out there that it's nothing that's even probably ever going to come close to it. So one time I was showing up to open the house up because I had an open house scheduled.

So just a couple, like maybe 10 minutes before. So I can turn on, open all the doors, turn on the lights, you know, put the signs out. I open the door and there are these two men having a great afternoon. I see everything. And I'm like, oh my God. I'm sorry. Oh my God. And I rush out.

I called the owner. I'm like, uh, did you forget we have a open house today scheduled? He, so the owner was not in talks with the guy that he, he used to basically Airbnb the house out while it was, uh, you know, vacant. Oh my gosh. And so the guy managing the property had Airbnb'd it and didn't know we were holding it open. And so I just walked in on some guys, Airbnb, you know, they Airbnb, they're having a great vacation. And I walked in and I was like, oh, my. So it's, yeah, that was pretty funny.

Oh, yeah, that's wild. Oh, my gosh. Were they, like, mortified or were they like, oh, it happens? Like, I mean, I think it was like every single one of us were just so shocked and stunned. Like, not one person was less shocked than the other. Oh, my gosh. Was it when, like, you're on TV, like, were they like, oh, my gosh, Chrisel just walked in on us? Well, that's a thing.

This is, like, actually right before we started shooting the show. So that was one of the things where it's like, that's the kind of thing, like, that would have been, I mean, TV gold if you blurred everything out. Totally. Oh, yeah, that would have been TV gold for sure. You're like, can we reenact this for the show? That's amazing. Okay, you wrote a book. That's incredible. It's called Under Construction. I saw your little cute reaction video to see in the hard copy version in person for the first time. It was so cute. Like, I can't even imagine. I've seen Jason working on a book. So I'm like, the blood, sweat, and tears that goes into writing a book. It's a lot of work. How long did it take you to do that? And you must, I'm proud of you. You must, I'm proud of you. You must be so proud of yourself. Thank you. It is a lot of work. I started it when we were still in the original lockdown. Yeah. And it was a therapeutic process. And then, you know, not knowing what, how much time and effort and deadlines by the time, then my life started picking back up and I had to go back to work. Then it really started to be. So I think at first, it was like

cathartic and this beautiful process. And then it, it definitely is stressful. But in a good way, why the time you're done it feels like you know it does it feels like you you've birthed a child or something not that i would know how that feels but i'm just saying that feeling yeah not as much pain but i get what you mean like it's something that you have like nurtured and put all of your love it to and it's so much of your like life that when it's done you're like i did that yeah so it's it feels good to you know to hopefully you know people are going to enjoy it and you know laugh and we get deep on things and I'm hoping that you know people leave you know just inspired to this is life we fall on our ass and you know the art of being able to laugh at yourself and get up

and figure it out you know and a lot like I was saying a lot of times when things go really wrong in the moment that's the time you need to realize I don't know why yet but this you know this is going to be something that I end up being grateful for and even in in the moment it doesn't seem possible But now it's happened so many times, I know that's true. Is that something like kind of what the book is all about, like the title under construction? Like how did you come up with it and tell me like more about what the book is exactly about? Yeah. So it's under construction because living my best life took a little work.

And it's basically, you know, it's just like in construction, you know, sometimes you have to knock a few walls down to let the light in, you know? And when you start construction, it's a big mess before it looks any better. And so I think this is the thing, you know, I've kind of embraced this platform that I begrudgingly found myself into at first, you know, where it was, you know, I wasn't, this isn't something that, you know, some people do want to just put it all out there. But if you're somebody that was going into this thinking, this is a business thing, you know, I wasn't, you know, I've had to, it's been a learning process. So I think that it's, you know, something that I've now embraced. people have connected with me on these things that they've now watched me, you know, where things don't go my way. And this isn't where I expected my life to be at this point. But it's also

the happiest I've ever been. And I'm, you know, I'm taking control of that and figuring it out. We only get one shot at this. So I think that that's, you know, where I'm at and just staying in a constant state of construction. I'm never going to get to that precipice and be like, I figured it out. You know, it's just constant. You know, you feel like, you know, you have to figure it out, but it's always going to be like that. It's so perfect because I say on this podcast and I've said it a million times and this goes along with that so well is that life is like I always try to think of my my body as my home and it's constantly under construction. You're always working. It's a project. It's an ongoing project. I've said that on like literally 10 podcasts.

that I look at my life that way as like it's it's never going to be perfect. There's always going to be a leak somewhere or a busted pipe or like something's going to need nurturing and figuring out. And I think that's a beautiful way to look at it. And can I say I think the reason why we were getting to this place of kind of reprogramming our brains and saying this out loud and connecting in such a big way is because we grew up watching all these Disney movies. Yes.

And it felt as if, you know, this thing is going to happen and then everything is perfect and you live happily ever after. There wasn't this, you know, it wasn't really made clear that that's actually not how it works. And so I think that once we all got to an age and we're starting to figure that out, and now we're all sharing and we're bonding over the fact that it's okay. Like, this is, this is life. Like we, you know, we're always going to be growing and changing. That's so true. Movies really messed us up all growing up in our generation because you're really. right. It was always like, a man will come sweep you off your feet and then you'll live

happily ever after. And we're realizing the power we have as women to drive our own careers and goals and how much we can accomplish. And now we're rewriting that story of, you know, you get to write it in a book. We get to share it on social media. We get to have Netflix shows and create our own content where we get to rewrite that story of what a beautiful life can look like, which can include hardships and failures and learning lessons and things that we didn't see in those Disney movies. That's so cool. I can't wait to read your book. I'm so excited. Can you give me a little snippet of what these chapters cover? Without giving too much away, I just want to ask about a few. This one. So I was a Walmart Barbie chapter two. Give me a little snippet.

So that's the chapter that goes into all of my crazy odd jobs that I've had before, you know, people know me as either an actress or a realtor. And, you know, I was a Walmart Barbie, one of the first, and it's how every single job that I had, even though how ridiculous or terrible it was, maybe at the time, it's all been a life lesson that has now helped me be great at what I do because that was the first time. I was actually signing autographs for little girls as Barbie with a heart over the eye. No way. Yeah.

And I remember, you know, I'm in this Halloween-looking costume. Ester breaking out into a rash on my back. But it was, I was so happy to be there. These little girls truly thought I was Barbie. So I didn't know that they were going to believe. So it was my first chance to, you know, play a role and play a character and sign autographs. And, you know, little did I know that I would go on to do that. But it was just, you know, it was, it was obviously, you know, it was cool. That's so cool. I did not know that. Or if I did, I forgot. But I don't think I would forget something like that. That's so crazy. The power of the flip. So this is all about, you know, in real estate, we flip homes. And, you know, so it's, it's all

about basically, you know, flipping, finding your worth and, you know, really flipping. For me, I had to flip the way that I thought because I came from a really poor background. And so when I started to get opportunities, I had this idea that I'm just happy. and grateful to be there. And so when it would come time to renegotiate, and now I'm getting down the line, and I realize everybody's making more than me. And when we start to talk about it,

I'm opposite someone that's, it's not even the same stratosphere. And yet we show up every day. We're married on camera. We're doing all these things. And so I had to kind of flip my mindset. It's also about, you know, there's some real estate stuff in there as well.

But it's, you know, that's the chapter of, you know, flipping how you think of things and taking your power back. in those moments. I love that. That's amazing. Okay, I love that. And then not so Cinderella. So I got to be Cinderella and Dancing with the Stars. So that was, that was Disney night and it was really great. And then so I didn't realize, you know, when they picked that for me, you know, it makes sense, you know, with my story and why they would have given me that character. But, you know, that's a story about relationships. That's a chapter about relationships. And I go into,

you know, there's been a lot of tabloid fodder at this point. And I really wanted to make sure the book is not coming from this place of, you know, being salacious or tearing anyone down. It's two people in a relationship. A lot of times if it doesn't work out, like I was saying, it ends up being a gift in the long run, even if it wasn't your decision in the moment. And so, you know, just that Cinderella, you know, she, like I was saying, you find your prince and you live happily ever after. and that's what I'm learning is not, you know, I want to be happy, but I'm not looking for a night and shining armor to give me anything. I've actually found my own independence,

and I like being in a place where I don't need anything from anyone. Yeah. But, you know, if that works out, great if I find, you know, the right person. But if I don't, then I'm okay going into that future on my own. You know, this is a thing that I've been thinking about. So I'm kind of trying to say open this year, see what will happen. But I definitely, you know, my happy ending might not look like what I grew up thinking. And that's okay.

Oh, gosh. Totally. 100%. I feel the exact same way. And like with your book, it's nice for you to have your voice, obviously. And so many times tabloids have written stories for you where now you get to write your own story, which everyone's going to want to hear that side of it because it's from you. You know, a lot of people probably want to know these things about you.

and you're like, oh, instead of the media writing my own narrative, why don't I do that? So I'm glad that there's a chapter there about that. Now, last time we talked, you had interest of going on The Bachelor, maybe being the Bachelorette. Could we still possibly do that? Well, I think, well, I was saying, like, back in the day, that really was something that was supposed to happen that, like, a very long time ago when I was on ABC Daytime, they were going to do a cross-prom thing. But I do think that. you know, as somebody that has to invite cameras into very personal moments you'll see in season five. I mean, it's very, it's going to be a little bittersweet. I started filming that

at a totally different place and you see the rise and fall of that. But, you know, I'm, it's not, it's not sad the way that I had to, you know, live through a past relationship. This one, we still love each other. We still support each other. Of course, it's bittersweet. It didn't end into the way that we were hoping it would but um there's still that friendship there that but i think as far as you know an online or a a show just about dating i feel like i already have so many producers in my ear trying to get too much from me already so yeah back away slowly yeah that would be very overwhelming wouldn't it yeah okay i've got a quick game for us to play before i let you go and it's called love it or list it

And it's about meeting your kind of perfect guy, not the perfect guy because those don't exist, but something that would be, you know, close to that for you, who just checks all of your boxes except there's one thing about them. And I want to know if you would love it or list it. Okay. Oh, I like this. Okay. What if he still lives with his mom?

List it. He doesn't drink wine. I wouldn't care about that. So love it. Yeah. Okay. He refuses to hold your purse if you ask him. Well, that would be weird. I mean, I wouldn't go around always asking, but if I did and he was like, no, I think that show, that's like a weird insecurity. So I would say listed. Yep, I agree. He doesn't tip at a restaurant. List it. Yeah. Nope. Service industry vet right here. Absolutely not. You have to be a good tip of it.

I'm the same way. His favorite music video is the thong song. Okay, that's quirky and funny, so love it. I have weird stuff like that, too. Same. Okay, I've said this on a podcast before, but one of my first boyfriends, his first time masturbating was to that song. Oh, my God. I die every time I hear that song because I'm like, oh, my gosh, I just think of that guy. That is funny.

That's so funny. Okay. On your first date, he tells you that he knew he was meant to be with a cancer. and unbuttoned his shirt to show you the cancer symbol tattooed over his entire chest. List it. I'm keeping an open mind maybe that, but it's like if it was a fake tattoo and he was like pranking me, then that's kind of funny. But if it's like a real tattoo, we got a list. Okay.

What about if he choose with his mouth open? I feel bad. I don't want to be super picky, but that would be also a list. Maybe you could just have a conversation with him and see if it changes. Okay, let's say that. We'll go with that one. Yeah. And last, this is not part of the game.

This is just my segment where I make you confess something to me. Oh. Oh, so I've heard. I know. You know. I love this part. You know. You know this is coming.

No, I know. Okay. So I go on my... I'm giving you real tea right here, by the way. Oh, I love this. I went on my first date since my breakup. I'm like, okay. hey, this is let me, you know, 2022, you know, whatever.

Yeah. Cut to, I knew he was younger, but I didn't know how old he was. Yeah. And so I said something, but he didn't answer, but I thought, oh, maybe he didn't see that I asked that. Yeah. And so I'm like, oh, I'll just ask him when he got. So I show up. And I knew he watched season four.

So I'm assuming he knows how old I am. Right. Because he had commented about the thing. We'd known each other for a little while. Yeah. Through mutual friends. And so then he talked. tells me how old he is.

I'm on a date with this person. He's 27. Okay. I thought it was going to be worse. Caitlin's 20. I'm 40. I know, but I thought, okay, 27 is quite young, but I thought you were going to be like 22. Okay.

Okay, okay. Yeah. That's, that's, yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. And so, and then he was like, what, how old are you? And I was like, you don't know. And then he says, I had the show on.

I wasn't like watching it, like, super. And I was like, you didn't Google me. And he was, he's really nice. He was like, well, I felt like. Like maybe that was disrespectful. I didn't want to. It's so sweet. And so then I tell him, he guessed 32 to 35.

And yeah, you look. So he was definitely a lot younger than I thought. And I was definitely a lot older than he thought. And that's how my, it was a little embarrassing. That was my first and only date. I was like, okay, I'm going to need to. That's so funny. But also, wait.

I mean, we laughed about it. You know, it's fine. But it wasn't a love connection. Okay. If he was 10 years older, would it have been a connection? I mean, I don't know because I think my brain is so close to that that I don't know. It couldn't have been, you know, more lovely or had fun anyway because we were like, oh, well, let's just, you know, hey, yeah. But, yeah, so I think I have a block on my brain. I don't even know. That's so funny. Well, sometimes, I mean, we always say it's about how old you feel.

And maybe he's an old soul and you're a young spirit. It works for some people. Yeah, and you had fun. So there's that. I'm proud of you for getting out there. Thank you. And like get it for a tractor to 27-year-old, get it. I'm like, oh my God, does this?

What's happening? Am I in my cougar stage? I'm on a date with a 27th. I was so mortified. Hey, check that off the bucket list. You know, you had your little cougar moment and we can all move on now. If I don't, I would have worn cheetah, would have been very prepared. Leopard, something.

Oh, my gosh. Could you imagine? that would if you were and then you're like well this is perfect and then you could have had a photo to send me for my pro for this podcast yeah that's so incredible okay so when where can people get your book it's out now right so it comes out February 8th you can create yes I have all the links on my Instagram and Twitter you can pre-order it now and it's also an audio book which I narrate so that's oh good I love when people do that did you have a fun experience doing that I did I thought I was, you know, it's fun, but it's also, you never realize every little thing, like you have to, you know, eat apples so that you're not making these unwarranted noises and just all these little things that you obviously would know, because you're dealing with audio so much. But as somebody that hasn't, you know, I've done ADR here and there, tiny little, we need this one line. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. But a whole book, it was, it was, because you want it to be good, you know, or sometimes you'll just weirdly say words wrong or I don't know. So it was, it was, it was. It was. It was. It was.

though. I'm like, now that I did it, I'm like, oh, I want to do that again. That was really fun. That's fun. Do you think you'd ever write another book? Not anytime soon because, you know, it really was a lot of work and I'm super proud of it. I want to enjoy it. But yes, I do think that it's something that after having done it, I can see myself, you know, down the line doing it again once we're, you know, in a different place and maybe, yeah. Oh, that's amazing. Well, congratulations on everything. And just for people, if they don't follow you, because you said it's in your bio, tell everyone where to go. Yes.

So on Instagram, I am Crischel. Dot Stouse. They're not a lot of Chrishels. So if you start to type it in, I'm the one with the blue check mark and then the same on Twitter,

it's Crishel 7. Okay, thanks, Chrischelle. Break your leg. Okay, thank you. I can't wait to see it. Bye. I'm so excited, Kate. Bye.

I'm Caitlin Bristow and I'll see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Get new episodes every Tuesday exclusively on podcast. Podcast 1.com, the Podcast One app, and subscribe on Apple Podcasts. Hey guys, it's Brooke. And Danielle from Gals on the Go podcast.

It's a very minimal change, but basically what I did. Wait, can we talk about the TikTok? Because I saw you deleted it and I need to know that. I wasn't going to bring it up, but now that you're bringing it out. On our show, we talk about everything from college, lifestyle, to navigating your 20s and beyond and there's always that quote that people say like if they like you you'll know if they don't you'll be confused but some people i don't know we hope you guys will join us every wednesday for brand new episodes right here on podcast one