Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Clayton & Susie: Bachelorette Premiere and Navigating Backlash

Episode Date: July 12, 2022

Claysie is back on the mic with KB and they have plenty to catch up on, from updates (and announcements) about their relationship to thoughts on the premiere episode of The Bachelorette, the “first” season with two leads! Clayton and Susie give all the behind the scenes of the first 6(ish) months of their relationship, including the struggles that almost made them give up and what they’ve learned about each other that has helped them to grow individually and as a couple. Then, it’s time to dig into the premiere: What did Claysie think about the “Clayton Sucks” jingle? Whose limo entrance was a favorite (KB & Susie def disagree)? Who has villian & future Bachelor potential (based on hairstyle & otherwise)? Plus, Clayton & Susie share the best piece of advice they have for those just starting their Bachelor Nation journey. PELOTON - Learn more at onepeloton.com.  HELIX - Helix is offering up to $200 dollars off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for my listeners at HelixSleep.com/vine . PROGRESSIVE - Quote at Progressive.com to join the over 27 million drivers who trust Progressive. HYUNDAI - Learn more at HyundaiUSA.com.   See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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And Progressive, quote at Progressive.com to join the over 27 million drivers who trust Progressive. This week's pod is brought to you by Hyundai and the 2022 Tucson and Santa Fe plug-in hybrid EVs. Learn more about the widest range of electrified vehicles at Hyundai, USA.com. Welcome to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Get ready to laugh, connect, and feel empowered with Caitlin and her guests as they sip wine, lots of wine. And get candid. They say vulnerability creates connection. So save the highlight reel for Instagram because when we're among Vino's, there's no filter.

It's time to unwind. Here's your host, Caitlin Bristow. All right, welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. so excited. I've got Clayton and Susie on the pod today to help me talk about last night's premiere of The Bachelorette. Obviously, I don't think Clayton was going to watch it because, you know, we all know that he hurt Gabby and Rachel and that might be like a messy situation or it's just really hard to watch for, you know, him and Susie being a fresh couple

out of the show. So they tell me what it's like watching it together, how Clayton is watching it through a different lens. We also talk about the ups and downs of their relationship. what they have learned since being on the show together and how much they just truly love each other. It's actually really sweet. I love these two so much. A lot of hot takes in this episode. So enjoy this convo.

Sometimes I like to just like sit here and watch you guys like. No personality, just staring blank at the screen, yeah. Just wait. I started humming and I was like oh that's interesting we saw you connect to audio but not video so I'm like she's probably watching us right now at least in my head I was thinking that exactly what I was doing I was just being super weird so last time we did a podcast you guys weren't in the same city but I feel like I'm kind of going to ask some similar questions just because relationships change and evolve and grow and like go through so much in months so fair enough all right so now that you guys have been together for what six months probably around that it's so odd we don't know we've a few times had this conversation we always ask where is the starting point does it right did it happen at the end when we films right technically march when we were able to be seen public i think we just go i go off of november yeah yeah or December we don't have an exact day but close we'll go half a year

ish but i feel like people are really getting to see a different side of you than obviously what was portrayed, like, during the ending and whatever of your season. But because you get to, like, now have your own platform and voice and show your personalities and show yourselves together, would you say that social media has helped your relationship or impacted it in any way? I think it's helped us individually kind of take back the narrative of we are and in what our relationship is. And obviously, we don't, like, come on social media and share every time we have a fight

or an argument right but you know on the show they sure love to air the arguments and the fight so it's like that's a lot of air time from the show but it is true like we get to take back the narrative now and i think it's helped us because i i do feel wait where was this on the show or why didn't we get more of this on the show and i think that does help me feel good about you know the use of our social media because it makes me feel like people are trying to see what we experience and what we do experience in our relationship. Yeah. Yeah, I would say just being able to have the ability to utilize the platform to express what we want to. And it's and it's we're under control of that. Nobody else is. So that's been really great because we're able to express ourselves,

which way we want to. And yeah, everything that she said, I agree with. It's having control of that narrative and being able to say, hey, listen, here we are, we're goofy. This is what we're passionate about. Totally. And we can, at any point, if we want to update individuals or just put out something new, we have that. We have the ability to do so. Yeah, I agree. And I don't want to speak for Michelle and Nate, but I mean, obviously they just went through a breakup. But I remember, I think Nate had a hard time with how it was aired because they didn't show, you know, the moments that they that were like really special to them they already had like an edit that they had for him or like you know they didn't want to show as much because at the end of the day this is

a television show that people watch for drama and to be on your toes and to not think that like they don't want you to know what's coming so they have to throw you off which in the end means that they don't get to show like the more beautiful side of the love story and it's really hard on relationships. So since your time on the show and since we talk last, how have you guys grown as a couple and how is your relationship now? A lot. I feel like a lot has changed.

Like we've gone through so, we've got like an evolution of the, of our relationship. Like goods and dads like all. Totally. I mean, it's been intense. I think Clayton really went through a lot from the show. Yeah. And not just the show, but. like the backlash that comes with it like even you know working with companies post show and like there

was so much that just dictated heavy emotions and I feel like as that's kind of gotten better and you've really worked through that like I've started to struggle with you know the narrative that was given to me and then yeah even as of recently like I feel like it's crazy because like I'm getting so many just really intense messages as the new season's like ramping up like people are just like coming to see what we're up to or people who don't follow us and I'm just getting like a lot more it feels like now even more than when the show first kind of aired I feel like I'm getting a lot of heat and like weird yeah it's weird so like I've kind of struggled with that because yeah you have to live within the narrative that people maybe not even in that a show

but the narrative that people give you based on it or think so we've both like struggled individually and it's been really hard but I think it's ultimately made us closer like we've had to work through some really intense stuff individually yeah but I mean I love the shit out of this guy he's like I don't know how else to say other than like I just literally love him so much and I'm yeah I think I would have quit if it were anybody else So that's nice. I mean, it's like that's a nice little like silver lining in it because as you're telling me that I'm like, I hate this for you. I understand that I don't know if maybe it's just something in the air, but I have been getting so much shit lately. The trolls are out lately. But I don't want to take away from how that feels to you. But I do like that something like that can bring people closer together because it really can tear people apart at the same time. So if you can. you know get through something like that and like lean on each other through it and if you feel like you're getting closer from it and that you love the shit out of each other I think that's

so cool like because that could really tear people apart it really can yeah it was it's really just interesting because I I feel that I went through a really tough part of my life and she was there with me all along the way and it took a lot of heat and then the the heat subsided a little bit And now I see her getting more heat than I am at this point. And so as I went through a healing phase and she was there for me, then all of a sudden I came out of it and I'm thinking, okay, this is great. Things are awesome now. But then she started taking the heat.

Yeah. And so then realizing that we have to be able to share each other's pain and be mindful of it. And I think that was really tough because we've been through really since the end of the show. We've experienced pain, whether it's my pain, her pain or a mix. Yeah. So it's wanting to be able to move on from it, but knowing that, like, we're experiencing it at different times. And that's been, that has been a challenge because we're both wanting to be positive. And once one of us becomes positive, the other one gets

hit with a wave. Right. It's also the positivity that we're exuding. The other person's saying, well, how can you be so positive right now? And it's like, yeah, you're right. Like, we have to share this pain and understand each other. That's been something that I can definitely do a better job of. really challenged myself to because I did step out and go, I'm in the clear finally. I'm in this great. And also now she's getting attacked. And that's put a really,

that's put a tough strain in our relationship at times. I think we've definitely had the conversation many times about, is this worth it? Because we feel that as a team, we're both taking heat at different points. And so that thought process of if we separate, we don't have to share the other person. pain. So we're not going to be in this constant state of feeling pain. And very quickly,

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Visit your nearest Hyundai dealer or learn more at HyundaiUSA.com. Call 562-314-4603 for complete details. Are you ever able to step back and realize that all of this pain is coming from people who don't even know you from people who don't matter like are you able to to remove yourself and look at it through that lens or is it like just so in your face at all times that it's hard to do that I think it's both because I think I think we're very different people I always say that yes quite nuts been like we're such different people like yeah and sometimes I have a hard time like understanding like is like is this really going to work

longevity wise because we're so different and we approach things so differently but he is he is really good because we might get into an argument or get upset over something like i've i've said to him recently like i just need you to like sit with me in this feeling like i don't need advice right now like i don't need you to fix this like i just want you to be with me and and he's like he totally like you know once we got through that conversation he was okay i'm going to do that um but it was it was true it was something where, you know, I was upset by something that I saw about me or whatever. And yeah, Clayton was like, I mean, can you like, like, disassociate from that being about you or us and like, be something that's somebody else is putting out there.

Like, you really put it into perspective that like, that's correlated with the show. That's something that has nothing to do with who you are as a person. And that was good advice, but like it was hard in that moment. And, but then it's like it triggers sometimes arguments or us being upset. Of course. So then it becomes about us. But when we take a step back, yeah, we can realize, like, it's really a lot of times trolls or, or, you know, the internet or the narrative that we've been given or whatever,

that can be painful. Yeah. And correct me if this is, I'm trying to word this the right way. I think we both are different as far as how we handle pain and what we need to help us get through that. And so where I need advice in a new perspective, she's wanting more comfort and just be here for me and experience this pain. Let's work through it together. I think that's a good way to word it.

That makes sense. I'm going to tell you something. Whether you're on the show or not, my therapist told me that that is like the number one strain on relationships a lot of times is that somebody wants to fix it and somebody just wants to feel it and it causes you to like not see the world through the same lens where you're like how could you not see what I need right now and because you both need something so differently but that is like the most classic that what you know the of course people argue about like money or other things but in relationships

there are so many times and I hear it all the time that somebody is just like well I'm just trying to fix the problem and then the other person's like but i don't want you to fix it i want you to just sit here with me and understand that this is how i'm feeling right now and it's just so not funny no it is it's a little funny that it's just like so classic but obviously like for you guys to be able to talk through that it sounds like you're both realists like you're realistic about your relationship and your situations and that you are honest about like wow could this work long term and yes we would be like more upset apart than we could be together at times and like I think the important thing for you guys to know and I'm sure you do is that like it's going to

pass like in however many years or times like you'll get to a point where you're like oh shit people aren't trolling me anymore like what happened like you like you will get to that point but it's just so hard because it's still it really is still so fresh it doesn't help that the show is just still making this about like how shitty Clayton was to certain like I hate how they're doing this season.

I hate it. I hated all the Clayton jokes. I the whole like I just didn't like it and I'm going to tell you something and maybe you know this and maybe you don't, but they do this every season. They always like when Ari did what he did to Becca and then Becca was the

Bachelorette, everyone just like tore Ari apart. It's just like they do it every season because the guys think it's funny. The producers obviously are like, we don't care. But has that affected you, Clayton? Because I know that like, you're so open about mental health, which I love because same zies. But I was watching that having empathy for you in those moments, just being like, God, has he not been through enough? I recently heard some really great advice from an audio book, Matthew McConaughey, Green Lights. an audio book and susie got me on to it and it's something i've heard before but i just need to be

reminded it was he was talking about hollywood and he just basically said it's not personal it's just business and as you just stated with ari or other bachelors they do it all the time all the time and as i saw the episode i was very happy to just feel that i'm like you know what it's not personal it's business and i'm happy with where i'm at today I'm pushing the things I want to push. I'm chasing my true purpose and passion in life finally for the first time. And I think through all the muck and everything that I went through, here I am because of this entire environment.

The opportunities I was given, I'm now able to chase after what I'm passionate about. So as I saw the show, the episode, and all of the attacks and the song, the choir that they had. Oh, God. Yeah, I'm going to go chase down those parents. yeah that's bullying ma'am but you know i honestly didn't really get a reaction other than i just kind of laughed i watched it and i thought you know i thought this is this two shall pass and i think i thought you know of all the things you've been through this is relatively mine or so on i mean there i get it there's a connection to my story with these two women but i imagine that as the weeks roll on my name will no longer

be said and yeah and this story will truly become about these two women and they said that they said on this episode you know we don't really want to be bringing his name up this is about our journey so i was like absolutely i get it there's going to be some crossover but i imagine it won't last yeah oh my gosh it was just like yeah you could tell even they were getting annoyed with it it's like we get it okay yes that was last season this is now yeah it's it was just annoying the choir i was like get you know what at this point just shut up I was ridiculous I look over at Susie and she's

she's bopping to it Not true Yeah she's like this is my new ringtone She's like Yeah she goes Yeah whenever we have an adversity down the line I'm just going to turn this on When you're saying some BS fight

And I'm just going to turn on plate and sucks Fight and thugs Yeah we made light of it We were both actually laughing when that part came up and okay good on his Clayton handled it better overall the night it was annoyed yeah come on like I mean I like Clayton has given you know he can laugh at himself and I can laugh at Clayton I think that's like the he's like the butt of most of my social media jokes yeah yeah I can laugh at him

and I can laugh at myself but also I my fear is like does this open the floodgates back up of like all the you know the hate and stuff so that's where I was like oh my my gosh like really but clearly was like yeah going with the flow he thought it was funny and or you know maybe he didn't think it was funny but he was like able to laugh able to laugh I was ever find light in it do I think that it's that's what should have been shown I mean no I do think it was a cyberbullying or attack or it's going to lead to cyberbullying and so for that I'm not the biggest fan of how that was shown but but it was and like you said it's just it's just nature of beast and I yeah it is not going to lose sleepover at this point anymore I'm like if I start

giving more power to people that are yeah have no interest and my passions and they're going to try to just pull me off this path that I've that I'm now on and I'm full steam ahead on it to me it's just simple as just ignore it let it let it let it pass because I'm not going to at this point allow people that I'm not going to give people power that have that should have no power over me that don't have that's that's just it it's so hard because I might have said this to you guys before, I say it a lot because it was something that really hit home for me when I first started to go to therapy after the show is my therapist was like, you are shopping for pain. Have I told you guys this before?

You have. I've said that phrase to so many individuals. Yeah. Therapists that I've talked to as I've been doing my mental health speaking and they love it. They're like an incredible phrase. I was like, yeah, I always plug your name. I was like, she's this. I go and it was one of the best ways to really phrase it is if you should go shop,

I think you'll find it. You will because I am in this world. I look at social media. I never see any hate towards you guys. You see it because, well, one, it's you. So it's your social media. You're going to see it. But do you go like digging in the DMs?

Like do you go deep in a rabbit hole and like look for that? Or do you like, because like I barely even touch my DMs. Because when I do, I'm like, oh shit, people still hate me. Oh, I was like, I didn't even really. realize people so heavy but holy crap um so do you go digging in the dms i do i mean i'm not like digging for anything that well let me let me think about that i'm not digging for anything negative intentionally but like the fire in me when i see something like it's like i could get a lot of messages that are are very similar like oh we love you you're wonderful this that like just super

sweet messages and we honestly don't have time to respond to everybody but we try if we can But I'll get that one message that's just like a real dig at me. And I'm like, oh, I'm going to write that. I'm going to say to you. So, like, I say and I think I'm not looking for it, but those are the ones that definitely triggered me. I don't really write back. Clayton has told me not to write some of the things that I've, like, typed out.

And I'm doing nothing, like, crazy. It's usually, like, just very inappropriate 12-year-old sense of humor. A few of them have been a little wild. Okay, well, they're fun, though. Like, they would be spicy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Funny, I think. And the person would just be confused, but...

But it would make you feel better. That's so me. I would say something so spicy and stupid back that they'd be like, what? And I'd be like, ha, got them. I'm like, you understand I do. Yeah, yeah, and you don't need to. Yeah, exactly. Do you guys do therapy together or no?

We don't, but we want to start. Yeah, we're looking at it just because... It was really interesting. We were doing our own individual therapy, but we were talking about each other. And it's, I think that it would be really great when it comes to, this is,

I don't want to say, when you're doing individual therapy and you're working on yourself, I think I found that I was really coming to a lot of realizations. And it was incredible for me. Yeah. But when you're telling this therapist about someone else, they may form their opinions,

not knowing what the other side story is. And so in a play, and I don't want to knock this. at all. I just think when you don't have both sides of the story, that therapist may start forming judgments about that other individual. And they can some way, put up a wall in between you and that other person because they're like, hey, this person seems sounds to me like they need this or they're asking. Yes. And so then you back to that relationship and you say, well, this is what my therapist said. And all of a sudden, you're like, well, my therapist said this. And that is tricky.

So I think like the ideal thing is for individually to have your own. therapist and then have a completely separate therapist for a relationship. That's to me, like, the ideal situation. I agree. I agree. Yeah. We're trying to find somebody that we can work with together right now. It's also hard to find people that, like, it's, I always compare it to when I started,

why am I laughing? When I started going on, like, antidepressants or, like, anti-anxiety meds, I was like, you have to, like, try ones that just don't work for you. and then you get discouraged and you're like, do I really have to start over again and find the right one? But once you find that one that works for you, it changes your life. And I'm not telling everyone to go out there and be on pills. It just works for me. But like that's it's the same mentality that I think of with a therapist. Like sometimes you have to go through a few and realize that they're not for you because it's so worth it to find that one that can again just change your life.

Yeah. Absolutely. I think we both feel. that and agree with that completely yeah it's words matter and individuals just the way they say it their tone all these different factors that can resonate with you and i can have five people say the same thing to me but they say it with a different vernacular with a different tone and i it resonates with one person specifically and i've seen that in the the podcast world we listened to she got me on j sheddy he has a it's a mental health focus podcast it's been great uh because his words really with the both of us so we get to listen to it together but a lot of the advice that he gives and the people he brings on he just does a really good job where we pick up on it and we can

both agree with what he's saying so we thought well hey if we can find that with a podcast or we can absolutely totally there's so many resources out there like even accounts to follow I follow one of the best relationship marriage counselor therapist on online even just her quotes she comes up with are just so powerful. There's podcasts, there's Instagram accounts, there's so many things out there that can resonate with people. I have to say I'm feeling pretty good today. I really am. Just woke up in a good mood. Big part of that is due to my sleep last night. Sleeping well or sleeping not well, like sleeping like poop really determines how the rest of my day is going to go. But when I'm at home in Nashville, I'm always having a good night's sleep thanks to

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I'm like, bitch, I was one of two. Like, yes, we didn't have two the whole time, but at least, acknowledge how difficult that was that I had two bachelorets on my season to start and everyone's like, I don't know how this is going to work. I'm like, I do. I know exactly how it's going to work. And I can tell you exactly what's going to happen. If you keep the both of them around the whole time, I just, how do you guys feel about the two bachelorets? And wait, let me, this is a two-parter. Let me just start with this. You guys are going to watch this season? Okay. Is that weird, hard? Or are you just like separating?

it and being like, you know what? Because I know, Susie, you got along with everybody. So it's not like you're like, you know, holding a grudge on these women. You are friends with them. Yeah. I'm super curious how it's going to work. And I'm also just like, I mean, I would have probably watched had I not been on late in season. Like I enjoyed the show of the past year.

So I probably would have watched anyways. I mean, it's like kind of a little bit weird, I guess, because I think I'm in love with both Gabby and Rachel or you had love for them. So I mean, yeah, it's kind of a little bit weird, but not enough to deter my curiosity. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that. That's good because I couldn't watch for like four years after. Yeah.

I mean, we talked about that too. We did talk about possibly not watching just. Yeah. I mean, we kind of did anticipate some blowback. And yeah, if you're watching the first episode, we're like, okay, like there's still some, you know, Platon's sensitivities. Right, right, yeah. I don't know.

I think I just want those, Gabby and Rachel, I want them both to find love and be happy and find something very similar to what we've found. So overall, I just think my lens that I look through is one of just

understanding the pain and everything that I cause, but now hoping that the page is turned that these two women find are looking for and everybody ends up happy. So I, just watching it last night, I just think, yeah, the only emotional response I got was really just hoping that everybody comes out the other side better off. And I say that from a standpoint of this first episode, I didn't really feel that there was a villain right out the gate. So I know that that's going to be coming.

And I hope that that individual can end up finding positivity because they're going to be facing the wrath that can be bachelor's. at times so yeah yeah i just i'm more so looking at it from that lens of i hope that everybody walks out of here being thankful for the experience and not driving themselves down the dark path yeah i mean oh it's just so hard like to not to go that every time like i saw gabby in the airport and i was just like please like lean on people that have been through this and who can be there for you because you feel so alone in those times as you know like you feel like you're the only one that's going through this and like how is this so hard on me but we like we've all been in this dark hole at some point from the show which is so sad but you said earlier and i really

appreciate this is that you're already able to look at it as like i get to like do things that i'm passionate about because of this experience you learn from it you grew from it you're able to look at this show now and like root for these two women even by acknowledging like yes i made mistakes or i hurt them but like now i'm rooting for them and hopefully something good can come out of this. That is so incredible that you're already in that place to be able to look at it like that. Because I don't know if I even could have done that like after my season. It's really hard. And again, it's hard on relationships. But I think if you guys can watch it together, I'm like, God, you're going to get married and have babies because you guys can get through

anything together. And I will just say, I really want to reiterate how helpful you've been. I think you were a capitalist for me. I talk about it all the time. as people ask me, who helped you really get through these moments. And Susie and my family, absolutely. But I'd say you, you, Rebecca Coo, friend, Thomas, Matt James, Rachel, these, I've had conversations. Michael A, he's reached out. I've had so many incredible people that have reached out to me and had went through it already. So, and I realized that my pain was shared.

But you've been wanting to check in multiple times. And I think when you told me your story, I was like, holy hell, this is so similar. And I had no idea. I thought I went through something completely different, separate from anybody else. And so that was really great. And I think it helped me move forward a lot quicker. Good. That makes me so happy.

I feel like I, I feel like I went through what I went through and like I'm in this position now. Like, I feel like I was, that's part of my purpose. Like, I feel like I'm supposed to help people get through this kind of shit because obviously there's only a handful of people that can go through it and speak to it and understand it and I had a really really hard time with it and I'm just hoping that it's not the same every season like I'm like they're already setting them up to just like fall in love with the same guy like what are you thinking that is going to happen you know with two bacheloretts I know they're trying to make it like it's empowering and we're in this together but it's

also the Bachelorette and there needs to be drama and there needs to be heartache and all these tough times and like you said villains we know it's coming and I'm just like oh I'm kind of like I love the show but I'm so sick of the same things where I'm like oh these two women you want them to find happiness and their own person but you're putting them together to date the same men like what do you think is going to happen and I'm so confused about how it's going to happen like what like what how do they hand out roses? Is it like to who they want? And like I saw in the preview or something that somebody's like, I don't want the rose from you. I want it from you. And like, how is that going to work? Does any of us know? I don't think any of us know, especially because the first episode, we didn't really get a rose ceremony. Right. Right. Yeah, I don't know what to expect. And I feel like before seeing all the previews and even like seeing how Gabby and Rachel seem together, after the show, I was like, oh my gosh, this could be so bad, like, and not necessarily that they would, like, turn on each other, but it could just lead to so much pain. Like,

right. The show can be so painful in a normal season. So having, adding two people to this scenario could make it like double painful and, and whatever way that it turns out. But it seems as if everything ended well, you know, like based on what being. So I don't, I don't know. I'm confused as well as to like how it's going to pan out what the rules will be i don't have an idea really well i didn't know how to navigate it as one guy so yeah there's no reason to ask me for my opinion on how you would navigate it with two people uh yeah and just it's one of those things where it's almost like a social experiment and uh how how it's going to turn out nobody knows besides those two women and the guys that were in that that experience as far as what happened if it was net positive

or net neutral or net negative there. Right. That's, I mean, that's where they're going to get us hooked in because the first episode, and this is nothing against Gabby or Rachel. I think they're both so lovely and sweet and they're just so good together and they killed the first episode.

But overall, I was like, snooze fest, this episode was boring. And then I'm like, but then on the other hand, if it wasn't, I'd probably be like, oh, everybody's so mean and this villain and I'm so sick of the same storyline. Like, I'm so hard to please when it comes to this show. I think everybody is because it's like, you, yeah, you want it to be entertaining,

but I'm also like, but be a good person. Everybody needs to be decent. Right. So it's like, where's the balance? But I am just hooked. And I don't know if it's because I know Gabby and Rachel. And so I'm just so curious. Like, I think that's it.

It's the curiosity. I think that's where we're all going to get hooked. How is this going to work? And I think that's what, you know, everyone's going to be talking about is how is this going to pan out? How is the rose ceremony is going to work? How are the dates going to work? And that's why you're going to tune in every week because you're curious. Yep.

Yeah. And I imagine, again, as you guys made the comment, it's like, you know, we want more. This wasn't what we expect. Maybe night one more drama. But it's interesting because, again, I can only pull from the experiences I had. I wasn't really an avid watcher the show prior. Right. I remember after Cheney went home on my season that the next week where I think was hometown.

and everyone was like, this is a snooze fest, this sucks, bring her back. Right. And that's where I'm like, okay, what do you want? Do you want drama? You say you don't want her. Then she leaves. Now you want her. And I was like, what is it?

And it's a balance. I think everyone wants to see. I think people watch the show because they want to see a train wreck with an incredible love ending. Like, most of the story at the end. So it's like how balanced both. I don't know if you can. I mean, not without collateral damage. So I thought the, this first episode did a really great job of highlighting the two women,

giving their backstory for those maybe didn't watch my season they now have a really good idea of okay here's these two women they're supportive of each other i think that's what night one accomplished is okay these two women are in it together uh i think they did a good job of kind of bringing some of the guys out and highlighting their a little bit of their character although i would say that i still have a lot of questions as far as okay i saw a few guys but hopefully over the coming weeks we'll start to get a better idea of who each of them are yeah so yeah i think for relatively kind of quiet night one, but, you know, again, will it stay that way? I doubt it.

Yeah, no, absolutely not. It will not. But you're so right. It's like, you want everybody to be kind and find love. And then you're like, but where's the drama? But then when the drama happens, you're like, this is awful. I'm so sick of this. God, it is, I don't know what the balance is either.

And I don't think anyone does. And I don't know if there is balance there. But who had your favorite limo entrance? Oh, favorite limo entrance. you know what the the chicks guy i like the guy with the chicks i hated the guy with the chicks you hated it well first of all i hate birds so anything that flaps like that would have really thrown me off but i hate when people refer to women as chicks i hate it okay that's fair i thought it was funny though i thought it was like i like i think i would like to hold a little

chicken so i feel immediately i was like i want to hold that and then I thought it was cute. I feel like he came in and addressed both of them, or is that somebody else? He was like, oh, I wanted to say this to you. Oh, no, that was the guy that had the headphones, right? Oh, the headphones. I liked that guy, too. I did too.

I did too. I thought that was cute because it was like, yeah, you're, I mean, I know from personal experience when guys come out of the limo and you're standing there with another woman and you're like, who are they going to hug first? Does that mean they like them more? Is that there for them? But then I could hear what guys were. were saying to Brit and I was like oh my god one guy said the exact same thing to the two of us and we were

like uh okay but like it's so I liked the headphones I was like that would have on my season and the headphones because I didn't want to hear what they were saying to her yeah that's yeah what was your favorite limit I was just trying to think about this time again I'm still trying to get not day one trying to get everyone's names down oh I don't remember I thought um maybe it wasn't the limo entrance but I thought Mario was a smooth talking man's a smooth criminal and uh totally yeah great energy i think that he's going to make it pretty far i i just thought he just really conducted himself well and i agree the vibes that i got from him just throughout the entire episode uh i felt really good about this is a genuinely good guy yeah

just knows how to it seemingly again a awful first impression but he seems to know how to navigate just treating when with respect and it's really hard But I think a lot of these guys, you saw it from the dynamic of the guys saying, oh, have you kissed one yet? Well, no, because I don't know if I should kiss one or the other. How should we approach this? Right. I believe they were all very cautious if we don't want to be disrespectful.

How do we navigate, trying to date two women at the same time? Yeah. So I liked that dynamic as far as by these men, you could tell, we're trying to be very respectful. And that's what I think led to them being very cautious. And it's going to be really challenging for them as they move forward. I know. How can I treat both these women equally with respect? I don't want to, yeah, come out the limo, pay all my attention to one person because now

here's someone else standing next to me that's now like, well, great. I kind of a fly in the room. If you think about it, you're usually, you know, the one bachelor or the bachelorette. You're kissing everybody else. Like you're dating all these, the same people, kissing the same people. So now it's like, where is, there's no line in this world, like of what's acceptable, what's wrong what's weird what's not like it's always such a gray area because it's like they're so cautious about kissing both girls but they're going to be kissing all the guys like and if it was just

one bachelorette they'd be kissing all the guys so it's so weird and i'm just so curious but i will agree with you with mario with he gabby gave him the first impression rose right yeah yeah and you could tell like when they were kissing like she kept going back for more like she was it's not like she was like okay she was like okay let's do that again like she you You could tell she was into it. I didn't feel, I felt like she had more chemistry with somebody else, but I still, like, loved with their connection and you could tell she really liked him. Yeah, I agree with that completely.

Who is the guy that, oh, Eric. Yes, Eric. A really good, like, natural connection and banter with Eric. I thought that that was, like, the chemistry. But then Eric got a little, a little upset that he didn't get it. They, like, showed it. He's like, I'm pissed off. But I'm not.

I kind of get it because they did have such a good connection and he probably thought he was getting it. So to know. And then you're like, oh, shit. It's like when it, and they said it. Like it's when it gets real. Yeah. That you're like, okay, I thought I had this. But clearly she's having a connection with somebody else. And then that's when the spirals and the wheels start turning. And it's. Absolutely. Yeah. It's tricky. That's interesting because as you just said that I thought back to when I was a contestant and how when I was on Michelle season, I had a really incredible conversation. I walked away thinking that was one of the better conversations I've had ever in a relationship sense. So, like, I know this resonated with her. But then the other guys there were having just this incredible conversation.

They'd come back and like, yeah, we just talked about this, this and this. I was like, that's what I talked about. And all of a sudden, I was like, well, I guess what I said wasn't special. And then I remember there was one night where I thought I was going to get the group date rose because I had such a great conversation. Yeah. And it was, I think, Martin, he ended up getting it. And when he came back and he said.

what all they talked about. I was like, man, it was like everything that I said, but he took it up a notch. And I just remember thinking at the end of the night, I was like, I can't get ahead. I literally can't, you know, I'm having a really great conversation. So I can understand how Eric in that moment probably felt, well, how did I not get this first impression rose? It was incredible. But that's the thing.

The competition is, it's, it's there. And these guys are, they pull from them from all over the country. And they're all, I mean, how can, how many different ways can you say one thing? These guys are all just trying to get to know these women. And so they're probably all kind of saying, similar to introductory conversation. 100%. Therefore, you just realize, you're like, man, I guess my work's cut out for me every day. I got to put my best foot forward because there's 20, 30 other guys that are doing the same thing.

It's so true. It's so true. But then if you think about it, it's the same conversations that you would have on a first date. So when you're having 30 first dates in one night, you're going to bring up the same things because it's like, talk to me about your family and where you come from and like things that you've been through and why you're here why are you single like it's always going to be the same conversations in every first date so again you're doing like freaking 30 first dates in one night that's an interesting dynamic too i think that maybe some people don't see but should is that these men are having the conversation for the first time

yeah me and rachel had that same conversation talking about their family about 30 times prior so it's also as the leads you have to be mindful that just because this is the 30th person tonight I've talked to I still need to treat the conversation with the same type of energy that I did the first because this 30th person it's their first time having this conversation I can't get into this whole spiral like I already brought up my family 30 times prior yeah both sides have to work on being like okay I'm in this moment I'm living in this moment so I can't think about all the other moments that happened prior. I need to pour into this fully. Because if you don't, then you do start to get like, okay, it's the 30th time I've had this conversation. Right.

Let's go fault to this person that happens to be a 30th person. That's just how the order went. I know. And then you could be like me where when I was on The Bachelor, my first conversation after like the limo entrance, I didn't even like talk to him. I was like, I'm going to teach you out a break dance. And I taught him out of break dance. And then someone came and stole him. And I was like, but I had so much more to say. And then I didn't get to talk to him like the rest of the night. And I didn't. I was like, I'm going home for sure. So I was like, oh, maybe I should have taken that opportunity to like, you know, get, because you don't know when the next conversation is going to be.

Some of these guys didn't get a conversation with them. And what I thought was interesting was the three people who they did have a conversation with, they sent home. They're like, can we just send you out actually for a second? And that they take it out. They're like, yeah. And it's the worst because it's light out. And you're like.

Yeah, I have to look you in the eyes now and it's bright out and you've been here all night, but like no connection. Sorry. Yeah, that was brutal. I mean, it's kind of like when you're in school or when you're getting picked for teams and it's like they're selecting certain people to step out and you're like looking around and you're like, is this, is this a good thing or a bad thing? Right. Right. Selected those three people. I'm like, they were probably so confused in that moment. Like what is this? What is happening right now? Like certainly it's not. the three of us. Yes, for sure. Right now. But I did hear, I don't know if this is a rumor or if it's confirmed, but I think those twins went on Paradise. Okay. Yeah. So I guess that's not the end of them. So I did notes because obviously I knew we were going to chat. So I was like trying to take notes on all the people. And I actually thought they were so sweet. I mean, I did too.

I really, I thought they were super genuine. And I mean, obviously the music kicks in as they're having their conversation and it comes off as like corky and like like as if they've never anything separate from each other but I'm like that is kind of very common for twins like I very common yeah twins spend a lot of their life together and they're their best friends and so I thought they came off as really genuine don't let anybody for not having a connection like that's just how it is but I really like them as people I thought they were yeah and it's hard to have a connection when you're just like it was like a double date and you're like trying to figure out like who likes who like it was just such a weird setup for them in the first

place but i was reading their bios and i did a whole podcast on like these guys bios i thought they were going to be the biggest douche canoes of all time like i was like these guys just talk about like going to nightclubs and partying and then they said they they seemed like really genuine and like in the moment and like curious that like they weren't douchey at all so it's kind of sad they let the twins go me too not even because i'm like i didn't really see a connection with the girls with them either. Yeah. But I just, I just thought they were nice.

And I'm like, give them, you know, give them another week. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. I thought they were going to just keep everybody. I was like, that would be a lot. But I thought they were going to go in and do, because I saw how much time was left in the episode and they hadn't done the rose ceremony yet. And I was like, I'm confused.

So then that made sense. But I am confused of this whole season. And I'm curious about how the rose ceremonies were going to work. But I did really like Tino, the forklift guy, who got Rachel's first impression. He seems sweet. and they seem like really like like almost love it for sight vibes we thought the same thing yeah i liked his uh when he pulled her aside he was the one about the stairs the stairs i was again i i thought that that was cute i thought that he did a good job of creating that memory and

just being mindful and aware that hey i've kind of walked i've watched your journey yeah i know what you went through and i just want to do something to let you know that hey i hopefully we can make more fun memories but this is something simple but I just think for him to come up with that idea as creative in itself and it shows he's paying attention and he shows he's trying to form new memories from maybe past memories that were painful so uh it no surprise he got the first impression rose and I think he'll obviously go go the distance yeah yeah they were really cute together I really like um their chemistry and I thought he was I didn't like his you two are forking beautiful even though I love a good pun I was like okay that was stupid but

then I found out he was in construction. I was like, okay, that makes more sense. But yeah, I don't know. I, I feel like Eric has villain potential. Really? Is it the mullet? Or is it just the vibe? Don't stay a mullet. No, I love, I love a mullet. But if you have one of my best friends, Tay, and he's actually our roommate. He lives in our apartment here, and he's got a mullet. I'm like, he has villain potential. yeah i don't know that's i don't i actually forgot he had a mollet i don't know what it is there's just something where i was like i have a vibe i think it's a soft it's not it's not a full go it's not like morgan wall and like like full mullet it's like a trendy mullet see we thought he had

bachelor potential but he's got a little edge to him and that's what i said i was like he he has like something about him where i'm like if he doesn't end up at the end with one of the girls. And then I was like, I mean, you know, I feel like he's got a vibe. I could be totally wrong. And so could we. Yeah. You could do. How much can you pick up night one? Yeah. I think for a bachelor potential. I know we're talking way too early right now. But yeah, I saw guys, I think Avin, that was one that I thought. Oh, yeah. End up if he, if one of the women doesn't or both don't pick him. I think good. I also, we didn't see a ton of him, but I just his aura and his presence, Nate, I think he

I don't remember who that was. See, he came on screen a couple times, but he didn't have a major role, I guess, for the first episode. So, but I just, I just, there's certain people that, I don't know, I think maybe you just, you're, you're really analyzing everyone in their body language. Yeah. Whether or not they're outspoken or more quiet, I want to say, Nate, and when I got the vibes, he kind of seemed similar to where he was maybe just taking the moment and it was really quiet night one. And that's how I was. And I think that, to me, I just thought, okay. this is a guy who's just aware of his surroundings.

He's just taking it all in. Taking it in. Yeah. That's so fair. Yeah. I kind of felt as like, I could see him as well being someone that will become more prominent as the weeks go on.

What about the meatball guy? I like the meatball guy. When I was reading his bio, I was like, meatball enthusiast. This guy is going to be the worst. And then I, and then I was like,

oh, I actually kind of liked that. Yes. I thought he was so sweet and genuine. Yeah. In genuine by his name Meatball Guy. And he just was like cute. I was like, oh my gosh, I hope he sticks around.

I don't know if he'll like, I don't know if he'll have a strong connection, but I'll root for him for sure. Yeah. Yeah. I think so too that I, he was one that surprised me. I'm trying to think of other people that really stood out. But I feel like it was Tino, Mario, the meatball guy, the shirtless, frickin' romance novel guy. Get out of here. I keep wondering, I don't know this for sure, but I swear I've seen him before because he's from Scottsdale and I was, I think he went to my gym.

Uh-uh. You never had a conversation, but I remember whenever I saw him, I was like, this dude looks familiar. Then I saw he was from Scottsdale. I was like, maybe we were in the same gym. We never said a word to each other. But yeah, it was funny. I was like, okay, I definitely was in the same city as him for three or four months. That's so funny.

I mean, he's built. That man, not an ounce of found in his body. so he came in riding that horse and they said like the girl said like fabio i was like yeah totally fabio that's it do you know who kately riley is i don't okay she's freaking hilarious you should follow her on instagram she makes me l-o-l all the time but she knew we were going through the bios she was who came on my podcast to talk about that and she was like making fun of the roby magician guy and then she was like wait i know him she like went to school with him and like totally knew him yeah she went to like acting school with him or something it was so funny but i felt

bad that he went home night one but i know there wasn't a connection with the women but you know what he seems so genuine hearted and and really was excited about the fact that he knew magic and i loved it as his passion totally asking really great questions yeah i just hope that he knows that again it's like those night one exits are so tough because you you question am i really that bad that i'm getting sent home night one and and i'm the worst of the worst that's come here no i hope he understands it again it's like listen man you you really read as a genuine kindhearted kid yeah that you I thought, I mean, I loved his magic. I did too.

I was good. Yeah, me too. I wanted to see more magic tricks. I thought that was amazing. Also, what I will say is so many times, like, you know, Gabby and Rachel probably were like, how could he do this to us to you? But once they go through this, you end up having so much compassion for the previous person and realize what they went through and how hard it is.

So I think that's another like, you know, spin zone. negative into a positive. I think they'll probably come out of this and go, okay, that is actually really hard. And you do fall for that many people. And then you do get clarity at the end. And like, we get it now. And I think that's something that like, I was so confused with Chris souls when he sent me home and like how he did that and everything. And then when I went through it, I was like, get it. Get it. Like high five him because I get it now. But we back out at all or just say like, hey, now that I've went through it. Yes. Okay. Yes. And also Ben Higgins. begins did that to me because I sent Ben home and he was so confused. And then after he was like,

I have so much like respect for everything you've done now, having gone through it myself, I get it. And I was like, I knew you would. Like it's just, that's just what happens. You know, like it's, it's really tricky. But being in, you know, that you have been in this situation and Susie, knowing that you are friends with these girls, what do you think they need to know? I mean, I guess it's over now. So you can't really give them advice. But maybe moving forward with social media or in a relationship, whatever it is, what advice would you give both of them? They're both very mature and we'll do fine navigating. I think they'll do fine navigating the post show life.

But I think no matter who you are, it's going to be hard because I think we've tried really hard to just keep a positive and healthy mindset at the forefront of our relationship. But like, it gets really tough. So I think my best advice would just be like, you're going to. you're going to do fine and what the pressure is meant to be will be don't let the pressure of staying together keep you together don't let the pressure of what people think about your relationship because there's a lot of people that had opinions about us being together don't dictate whether you stay with them or not like do what it's just noise yeah it's just noise do

what is best for you individually and when you if you decide to become like a couple do what is best for you two together and and lean on like you said lean on the people that have been through it and work for them like a thousand times if they ever need it so totally yeah that was you said I a thousand percent agree with that so I those my anyways we started talking I was like that was one I was thinking of but I have another one as well I think for if those two are in relationships I assume they are I don't know to what degree right but if they are I would tell them to over communicate from the very beginning because their significant others are going to now watch this season They're going to see, they're going to see the women with the other men.

And I know that when we went through it, it was tough because a lot of things I said to her, I said something similar to somebody else. Totally. All of a sudden it didn't feel special anymore. So she started to think, well, how special really was this? Because you said similar things. And that's where also if there's any surprises as these women, I would tell them to not wait, tell whoever they are right now that they're with like tell them because if there's something that

might be breakup potential that they know it's coming that they're significant other doesn't know yet but it's going to see they need to get ahead of it now talk about it ahead of time so that whenever it does surface they already that the guy is already expecting it to come because what happens is if you don't do that the moment hits and then all of the backlash online or all everyone's opinion gets injected in as well that you know it takes what could be a two on scale 10 as far as something that's detrimental. It can take it up to a 10 just like that with all. So true. So they have to, I think they have to get ahead of it all and just say,

hey, listen, I'm going to walk you through what all happened with everybody, if you want me to. I want to tell you these things so that you know they're coming so that when they do come, you're not going to, the magnitude of it won't become exacerbated. It won't be so much worse. I'll be able to love. That is so true. That is actually really great advice. I'm going to pass that message along because I don't know if they'll listen to this episode. Maybe they will. If they don't, I'm passing that long. That's actually really great advice because that was something that I had to do on my season. I chose to not do it after we were together. I had to tell Sean in that moment on camera what I did because I was like, I'm not getting through the end of this and have him not know until we're watching it back. I want to get ahead of it. I want to own up to everything that I'm doing. And although that didn't working out. I'm still, like, so glad that that was the decision I made. I think that's really important. I just freaking love you guys. Thank you so much for talking about this. I know it's probably like, well, it's fresh and it's hard and it's, you know, all the messy things to talk about.

But you guys are just, you do everything with grace. And I just adore the both of you and just want to know what is next for you together individually. What's coming up? We actually kind of have big news. I don't think This might be like, if you want to share it. You're pregnant. I'm pregnant. I was like, wait, I feel like I've talked about the news a lot. Not really. I was like, wait, what are you going to shock me with right now?

We haven't posted that we're moving. Oh, okay. Yeah. We're moving. Yeah, we're removing the Scottsdale. Oh, fun. Well, we'll be in Scottsdale in the interim as we look for houses around the area. Oh, congratulations.

That's huge. yeah like we haven't like we haven't shared that publicly we talked about it when people ask about it like it's breaking news breaking news headlines everywhere Clayton's pregnant that's what they're going to take out of this in a Brito 8 last night it would look that way yes I feel you on that oh that's so exciting congratulations I'm I will come visit because I love Scottsdale and are you going to continue to like speak on mental health and do your fitness stuff together and individually.

Yeah. That was one thing real quickly. I didn't realize it, but at first we were so scared of all the stuff that was happening from the show and the blowback. And so I took the initiative where I said, hey, listen, like, let's just do things separate, but realizing that if we weren't doing it as a team, it kind of set us up for this, there was always this thought of why are we not doing it as a team is because we don't think this is going to last.

And we had this conversation recently and we said, you know what, let's pour into each other fully. Let's do this together. We don't know what tomorrow is going to bring. but we love each other today. So let's just go in full steam ahead. And we have. And it's been awesome.

I mean, we've been doing this. We're building together. And so we, as we succeed and win together, it feels really good and it creates a stronger bond. So, yeah, we're going full go with the fitness.

I love that. I just spoke in Dayton, Ohio on Friday over mental health. And she was there filming out all of it. So a dynamic duo, even now she asked me, she's like, hey, for weddings,

would you be willing to be the second shooter with me? So I'm like, yeah. Look at you guys. Yeah. So I think that'll be fun. I'm hoping we can book some like destination weddings or totally in the in the mountain somewhere.

So yeah, we're just trying to like help each other out and help each other succeed. Guys, that is so nice. Thank you. Oh, that's really sweet. I'm just so proud of you guys, both on your own and to,

you just every time I talk to you I'm like I'm just so impressed and I'm so happy and thank you for always being real and honest and I just love that Clayton you're able to now talk about mental health and like use your platform for that and that you guys can work together and just like be rooting for each other and like you can just tell the love between you guys is so genuine like of course we go through hard times and there's messy times and there's ups and downs and all those things but that's a relationship and I'm just so grateful that I have you both in my life. We feel the same way.

We honestly, we talk about it often. We're like, let's, that's so nice. And Jason. We love with you guys. We will come visit you in Scottsdale.

Oh my gosh. Keep me posted on the move and like when that's happening and stuff because that's so exciting. And then I'll come visit. Yes. Sounds like a deal. Awesome. Where can everybody find you guys?

Because I like following your fitness stuff, to be honest with you. It's, I get inspired to go work out. Nice. That's awesome. We love that. I'm big on Instagram. Clayton, not great easy to find me. Susie is also big on Instagram and also TikTok.

So she does a great job. She's a professional when it comes to navigating these platforms. That's fun. But yeah, TikTok as Susie was like. And Instagram is Susie C Evans. I'm obsessed with your guys' TikToks. Thank you so much. I'm Caitlin Bristow.

I'll see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Off the Vine. Don't forget to rate, review. and follow on your favorite podcast platform. And we'll see you next Tuesday. Hi, podcast listeners. This is Kelty from the Lady Gang podcast with over 150 million downloads

and about 150 negative reviews on iTunes. You know that people either love us or they hate us, and that makes a great show. Lady Gang is a twice weekly podcast where we help you feel less alone in your life with the help of our favorite reality stars and housewives, but mostly me and my two friends, Becca and Jack, talk about the ugly and ridiculous and crazy things

that happen in our lady life. Come get inspired, come get a virtual podcast hug from us every Tuesday and Thursday, wherever you get your podcast on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or wherever else you listen. See you there.