Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Dr. Jennifer Lincoln: Let’s Talk About SEXual Health, Baby!

Episode Date: December 20, 2022

Content Warning: Sexual Abuse and Trauma Today on the pod, OB-GYN, podcaster, and TikTok extraordinaire, Dr. Jennifer Lincoln, joins Kaitlyn to talk about (c)literally everything because noth...ing is TMI when your day job is vaginas. Dr. Jen is here to answer all of your questions without a side of shame that we might normally feel at school or in the doctor’s office. Does birth control make us pick the wrong partner? And will it affect our fertility? Is there anything we can do to enhance our sex drives? How often should we actually be replacing our underwear? Is a cup, pad, or tampon the way to go? Is cycle syncing a real thing? Kaitlyn opens up about her experience with PMDD and asks Dr. Jen some of the questions that have been on her mind lately when it comes to sexual health and wellness. The two wrap up with a highly requested game of “ken you not” as well as some OB fact or fiction and of course, confessions. Thank you to our sponsors! Check out these deals for the Vinos: ADVOCARE - Get 15% off your first order at AdvoCare.com/otv (“otv” all lowercase) today. EHARMONY - Download the eharmony app and start free today. TALKSPACE - Use the code VINE at talkspace.com to get $100 off of your first month and show your support for the show. PROGRESSIVE - Quote at Progressive.com to join the over 27 million drivers who trust Progressive.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:01:38 and show your support for the show and progressive quote at progressive.com to join the over 27 million drivers who trust progressive welcome to off the vine with Caitlin Bristow. Get ready to laugh, connect, and feel empowered with Caitlin and her guests as they sip wine. Lots of wine. And get candid. They say vulnerability creates connection. So save the highlight reel for Instagram because when we're among Vino's, there's no filter.
Starting point is 00:02:12 It's time to unwind. Here's your host, Caitlin Bristow. Welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host. Caitlin Bristow, and I am not going to lie to you. I usually don't look forward to a visit from an OBGYN, but today, I feel very differently. My guest today is not only an OBGYN, but an author, podcaster, mom, social media educator who wants to answer all of your questions without making you feel shame or embarrassed. I love it. She's also a huge advocate for reproductive rights and non-shamed based sex education. And like me, she believes there is no such thing as TMI. Honestly, I feel like everyone will love this podcast. So please enjoy today's combo with Dr. Jennifer Lincoln. Hi.
Starting point is 00:03:05 Hey, how are you? I'm so good. How are you? Good. Oh, my gosh. I love your background. Love it. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:03:12 You know, it's so funny. I've been talking about this with my producers is that I'm so sick of my own background. I've seen this for like the past four years. And I need an upgrade. Yeah. So the other day I put up all my Christmas decorations and I had the best set up in my dining room. I had like a pink Christmas tree behind me and like all these Christmas decorations and light and I brought out the ringlight and I attached my microphone to the dining room table. And it was like the perfect setup. And I realized it's the only spot in the house that where the Wi-Fi doesn't work. Oh, no. I was like, come on now. Of course. I know. It was so annoying. But I'm so excited to talk to you. Me too. It's just fascinating stuff.
Starting point is 00:03:54 I feel like we're all in a place where we want to learn more and be more knowledgeable about our own bodies. And it's crazy that when I put this on my Facebook page, we had like the most questions come up for any guests that we've had in years. Yeah, there's a lot of questions because there's not a whole lot of good answers out there. So I, yeah, exactly. Happy to be here. And I can chat about vaginas all day long.
Starting point is 00:04:15 So here for it. Literally it's what I do all day. I love it. I just took, my fiancee just came in and he was like, who you got on the podcast? And I was like, oh, we're going to talk about vaginas today. And he was like, that's a really great idea. He's like, people love that. I'm like, I know. I love it. I know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. He was like, wow, that's amazing. So I'm so excited to get into the conversation today. Yeah. My, so I call my listeners Vino's. And we were so excited for you to come on. And like, they wanted to do a series about these topics because they're like, we want. We want. answers. We want all the information. So I'm just curious to know, first of all, why you got into this particular field. Like, did you consider other areas of medicine? Why this one? Yeah. You know, no, I kind of feel like my heart was always an OBGYN. Even though going to med school when I was there, I was like, I kind of like it all. But I just, I think I always knew, but I didn't want to commit.
Starting point is 00:05:12 I always kept an open mind. I mean, not for everything. Like, there was no way I was going to do certain things but then I did my rotation and it was just super cool that I could go from delivering babies to operating to helping somebody who was in a really tough spot maybe with a tough relationship or their partner cheated on them to treating them in a way where they felt empowered and not ashamed to you know just just a huge range of things that we get to do and I personally love the additional stuff outside of medicine so I like the advocacy I like the I like the fighting for our rights. I mean, I hate fighting for our rights. But I just like, I'm like, yeah, you want me to do it? Sure, I'll show up when and where. And, you know, we ride a dawn kind of thing. So I think it was totally fit for my, for my energy. Yeah. No, it's so true. I feel like I was, I was looking through your social media page and I appreciated all of the advocacy that you do as well. I was just talking to. Did you ever watch Full House? Today, ever watched Full House. Are you about to talk about Tody Sweden? Yes. Yes. She's amazing. I love her. Yes. She's incredible. Incredible. I just had her on my podcasts and I was telling her just like how cool it is to see her, you know, use her voice and her platform to do these kinds of things.
Starting point is 00:06:27 Yes. No, she's doing great things. Yeah. I got to be on a Zoom call where she was sort of like, you know, getting people riled up before the election. And I was like, look at her. Really? She's all grown up. I know. You're like, good for you. You've been through so much. You've been through so much in her life. I just love seeing celebrities who are using their platforms like her. I mean, Sophia Bush, Shonda Rhymes. I mean, so many people. And it's great because it's like, okay, you guys have the, you have the platform. Like, let's do this. And then when they do it, regular people can be like, oh, yeah, I can speak up too if they're going
Starting point is 00:07:02 to put themselves out there. Yeah, exactly. It is great. It is great. And your social media is great. And your accounts say that you're providing the health care class you wish you had in high school. I always wonder that. I'm like, same thing with, you know, mental health, women's health, so many things that we're learning in school where we're like,
Starting point is 00:07:23 can we like replace this with like something more beneficial to what actually matters in life? And it seems like it just gets ignored all the time in the school system. But what was your own experience with learning about these topics growing up? Oh my God. Well, there was none because they went to Catholic school and we're not here to hate on Catholic school except that. You don't really get in general a good. sex education. So it was, you know, say a prayer. Don't ever touch yourself down there. Don't ever, you know, do anything before you get married or you'll, you'll, obviously, you'll go to H.E. double hockey stick. Like, there's just no question. So there was none. There was like the
Starting point is 00:07:58 bare bones basics. And then I went to college and I looked around and I was like, well, this is different than what they said was going to happen. Right. And, you know, back in the old days, you know, we didn't, because my kids are like, you lived, you know, in the 1900s. And I'm like, up, you guys. Like, I'm still relevant, but we couldn't look things up. I know. Like, thanks a lot. I'm not dead yet, but now I feel like I am. But. Yeah, seriously. So there wasn't a whole lot except you talked to your best friend or your sorority sister, which now it's magnified. Now, at least young people can go online and can get a bit of a supplement to what they didn't get in school. But it's not guaranteed that it's
Starting point is 00:08:36 going to be good. So, yeah, I kind of, all my socials, all my content, my podcast, everything is like I'm talking to the version of me who had no idea what I was doing and, like, the topics I would have wanted to have been taught about rather than have to figure out on my own. And sometimes I didn't always get the right stuff. Well, and it's like never too late to learn as well. So like, yeah. Anyone from the age of like 13 to wherever you are in your life could probably benefit from listening to your podcast or following your social media accounts. But that's when your kids are saying you live in the, you grew up in the 1900s, do you say, yeah, but I'm, popular on TikTok. So my 12-year-old, because, you know, I get like this TikTok shit sent to me
Starting point is 00:09:18 and like this Advent calendar. He's like, Mommy, are you famous? And I was like, no, honey, I'm not famous. He's going to be sick. But you met President Obama and President Biden. I was like, I was like, okay, so I'm like a little cool, but I'm not super deep. Yeah. So. Yeah, but I'd rather be cool. I'd rather be cool. I'd rather be cool than famous, especially to my kids, like especially to the kids. But you have over 2.8 million followers and over 50 million likes. But what made you want to get on TikTok? Because to like, and when did you? Because I feel like the app started as such a like silly dancing app.
Starting point is 00:09:51 But then it became super educational. Totally. Yeah. I jumped on before the pandemic. So I'd like to say I was like a little cooler than all the people who got on in the pandemic. But still I wasn't like transcending. Trust me.
Starting point is 00:10:02 No, I didn't want to go on TikTok. I said, I know one thing's for sure. And I'm never going to go on TikTok. I'll stay on Instagram. I'll do my educating here. We can talk about this stuff all day long, but TikTok is for people, like you said, who dance. And then I did one post and it went viral and got like a million views overnight because my friends, my doctor friends kept saying, Jen, your whole audience is like literally here.
Starting point is 00:10:21 It's young people who need to know about their bodies. And I did it. And now I'm stuck in it. And now we're all stuck in the rabbit hole of like, you know, dogs typing at keyboards. And then I actually, I mean, we all know this, right? It's going to be the next thing that we older people will probably end up ruining and something else will come over. But now it's where people go to get their news and it's where you can really have an impact. And as much as I love being there, sometimes it's really hard to see all the junk that's out there. But then that's why I'm there. So we just keep going. Right. I've learned so much about different trends and things. I'm like, see, I am cooler now because I'm here. You really, I mean, you also, like you said earlier, you got to meet Obama and Biden and how did this happen? I need the backstory of because you have a TikTok with Obama.
Starting point is 00:11:05 I do. I got to touch him. It was great. But the Secret Service was there. Don't worry. everything was fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. It was one of these things where the DNC realized that they needed TikTokers and influencers to kind of help get the message out to get young people to vote. And so they were smart and they, you know, got people from TikTok. They were a lot younger people and there was like me. And we got to go to D.C. and get a tour of the Capitol and do these, you know, a couple TikToks with Obama. When we were there at the White House that day, it was when President Biden got his updated COVID boosters. Then we got hours. We got to go in and like sit in front of where the press was. It was super fun.
Starting point is 00:11:41 I was like a kid in a candy shop because it was, you know, like Dr. Fauci and the, you know, secretary of health and human, the U.S. Surgeon General. It was insane. It was like, I don't know if it really happened, but it did. But it did. It still feels like a dream, but it actually happens. That's so cool. It's the power of, you know, TikTok right now.
Starting point is 00:12:00 It's true. I mean, you can scroll anything from like a DIY home project to like some, like, some, like, fail army ridiculous, like people falling and tripping and, like, I'll laugh until I pee my pants. And then you can learn a lot and it can be really informative, especially in the work that you're doing. Yeah. And you look at things like, you know, what's happening in Iran with a revolution there. Like just these platforms are really, you know, Gen Z is is getting the word out about things. And it's such a powerful tool for them. So I'm happy to be there and be like their health educator where, you know, if they had me, they had a nun who, you know, was like, don't.
Starting point is 00:12:39 ever think about your vaginas and I was like okay I'll just pray it away it's so interesting to me that that's what what is taught in that system because everybody realizes at one point that's not the truth so it's like why are we you know lying to everybody but right and speaking of lying to everybody there's again in social media there's so many myths and I know you debunk a lot of myths but what are some of the biggest myths about your field that you see on social media Yeah. This is my favorite. I think this was from last week. It was somebody saying that taking birth control makes you bisexual. And I wanted to be like, honey. Yes. Yes. And I, you know, if this, if she is and this is her way of being able to say it, then honey, just do it. Like, you be you. It's not the pill. Right. Yeah. That's my favorite or that it makes you pick the wrong partner. I mean, people like a certain celebrity, maybe Ricky Lake is that, you know, there's just a lot of stuff out there that is not founded in sound science. People will cite one tiny study that involved like smelling people's t-shirts and they thought it changed the smell of who was attractive. And what they don't understand is that these things are not like good science on a
Starting point is 00:13:47 large scale. But then they make this quick TikTok and people are like, oh my God. And so then they stop and then it goes viral and then they that's crazy. Wait, are they trying to blame it on because it does something to your hormone levels, which makes you like change certain things about yourself. Like is that what they're blaming it on? Right. The claim is that like it changes your hormone and your brain chemistry to now all of a sudden you just want to sleep with a whole different gender, which I'm going to say no. Yeah, we're going to debunk that right here. That's a stretch. So there's, I would say what I see the most misinformation with has to do with birth control 100%. And I don't fault a lot of people for it because you just hear something
Starting point is 00:14:28 over and over again, you think it's true. And when you were given no words or, you know, no base of what is even physiologically possible, like, of course you'll believe it. It's not your fault. And what I really have a problem with is the people who are on there selling these supplements and detoxes and cleanses making completely ridiculous statements. Like, you know, like you need to do all the, I did one episode on my podcast recently about cycle sinking, which is like you need to eat certain foods in different phases of your cycle in order to optimize your life. And that's made up because really what they're saying is just eat healthy food and just, you know, like listen to your body. Like that's it. That's it right
Starting point is 00:15:04 there, but I can't package that up and sell it to you for 100 bucks a month. So we make it complicated to profit. That's just saying. So cycle thinking and eating certain foods at certain times. And I saw one about exercise. Yes, I talked about that too. Yeah. So that's not true. No, sorry. No, that's good to know. I don't. That was so stressful for me to think about that. I know. Well, and so that's what I, how I wrapped it up my podcast was this. If you like that idea and it like feels like it gives you control and you feel good, awesome. Go. for it. But really what happens is a lot of people who hear this get anxious that they're not doing this think that's why their life is a certain way or they just feel like they have to spend more money
Starting point is 00:15:43 or do more. Otherwise, like, they'll be in like menstrual hell. And it's not true. Specifically with the exercise stuff, they did really, you know, they did a whole review of a bunch of studies and found really no benefit. So what I tell people is if some days you feel like you might, you know, you're struggling with lifting weights because you're bloated and or you're on your period, then maybe you do something else. Like you just listen to your body and try to be healthy overall like that's really what it is but you can't make an entire program off of that so right health and wellness can seem so overwhelming and and you know every anything that has to do with your body and your mind but really it is sometimes as simple as just listening to your body and knowing what it needs
Starting point is 00:16:20 in that time and whatever time that you're in and I know we're just talking about birth control I hear so many different opinions on this and and again you're hearing so many opinions on social media and things go viral, but is birth control really that bad? Or should we be on birth control, like specifically the pill? Yeah. And, you know, this is a question I do. I get all the time. And I'm, I have a, that's like, that was one of my first podcast episodes, which is birth control BS, which is like, is it that bad? Because I had people calling in and asking me, like, Dr. Jen, is it really, is it really that bad? Am I going to die from when I'm on it? And, and the answer is, no, it's not. And in the vast majority of things that people are worried about, like, blood clots and strokes and
Starting point is 00:17:00 heart attacks and depression and waking and, you know, all the things that they say are side effects, which they are. All of those side effects are way higher in pregnancy. So it's like compare it to the non, you know, if you're just, you know, we don't walk around telling people, pregnancy is so bad. Don't ever do it. You know. Right. Right. And that when it comes to birth control, it's very much an individualized thing. It's neither it's something that will fix everything for everybody, nor is it the worst thing for everybody. It's about what's right for you and your situation, but that's not sexy. And I think a lot of this is a pushback to the fact that we as women and people with vaginas, we've often not been educated enough. We've not, we've been
Starting point is 00:17:40 talked down to or ignored completely in the classroom and in the doctor's office. And so the what's kind of come out and rebound is this like over trying to like correct and now, you know, saying, oh, well, I can research this and look how terrible it is and you didn't tell me this. And really it's somewhere in the middle. It's about informed decision making, informed consent. And rather than going out there and saying birth control causes breast cancer, you know, actually talking to somebody and saying, you know, it's about, you know, five or six cases out of an extra, out of, you know, 50,000 women a year who are going to get it.
Starting point is 00:18:11 That sounds a lot different than it's going to give you breast cancer. But once again, that doesn't tend to go as viral as quickly. So I'm all about being informed, but it's like always saying, what is this person's motivation who's telling me this? Are they an expert? Are they trying to sell me something? And then you can kind of figure out if you want to listen to them or not. Yeah, that's so true. That's a good question to ask yourself. Are they an expert or are they trying to sell me something? I think it's really important. Or they could be an expert trying to sell you something and it could be good. But you just, you have to do your own research and be really confident in what you're doing. Okay. So if y'all have been listening to the pod recently, you've heard me talk about Spark by Advocare, which has been my go-to for extra energy lately. I've been really enjoying them. It comes in 14 flavors. It has 20 vitamins and minerals and enhances mental focus for those days where you really really.
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Starting point is 00:21:19 Is that why you got into the podcasting space? You're like, I need to have way longer of a conversation about this than just short videos on TikTok. Yeah. And I feel like, so what's different about this is people can call in, leave a voicemail or they can just leave me a voice message and my DMs because I just want to like answer people's questions that I know that they have because my comment section sometimes would be insane with so many questions. And I can't just keep making TikToks, TikToks.
Starting point is 00:21:42 And I wanted to dive in a little bit deeper. And what I like about them is I get to like dive into like a little bit of history, a little, you know, do you understand where these words came from? we had a really fun one talking about the names of sexually transmitted infections and all sorts of different things. So I just thought it was a different way to interact. And it's been really fun people calling in and trusting me with their questions. I think it's super fun. And it's for everybody. I know I have an episode coming up about menopause too, which is I, you know, like you said that really my content is for everybody because if you never learn something and you happen to be 50, like now's a great
Starting point is 00:22:15 time to learn. It's never too late. So it's really for everybody, which is fun. I love that. And I heard you say in your first episode that teaching our kids about these topics and using real scientific words can actually make our kids more safe. I wanted you to dive into that a little more because this is fascinating to me. Yeah. So quick, you know, content warning. We are going to talk about sexual assault here. But that's really where it comes from because studies have shown that kids who know the words of their body parts and not just saying, you know, down there or my bottom. When they know what a vagina is and they can say those things, you know, our penis or whatever, they are less likely to be targets by who are trying to abuse them because those people will say, oh, wow, that kid knows that word.
Starting point is 00:22:57 They're more likely to speak up because they know the words and they probably talk about this stuff in their home. So we know that kids who use accurate words are less likely to be abused. And then if they are, they're more likely to report it. And you might say, well, then why are you like your book and your podcast is let's talk about down there? Like, that's kind of the point. That's how I like suck people in. I'm like, that's a word you're comfortable with. Now, let's say the words out loud and, you know, feel good about it. But so it's kind of a tongue and cheek thing. But, yeah, I mean, my kids, you know, these words are words we've used all the time. So it's not like, now we're going to have the talk.
Starting point is 00:23:28 And it's this really awkward thing. Like, it's just like, okay, you know, mom says these words all the time. And it's, you know, just another day. We're learning about another body part. It's not controversial. Right. Like we're always saying other body parts. Why do you think we have come up with these nicknames and brought shame around the actual names of them?
Starting point is 00:23:47 Why do you think that's happened? Because in polite society, we. We just can't talk about our bodies. And so it's the muting of, just like when you're muted in the classroom, you can't talk about sex or sex education. It's the same thing at home. It's just this thing you don't talk about it. It's not polite.
Starting point is 00:24:02 Or if you do say those words, it's somehow dirty. It's shameful. If you use those words, then you must, you know, you must know more and why do you know more? You're a bad person. You've had sex before. You've masturbated. So it's just all rooted in shame. It's completely rooted in shame.
Starting point is 00:24:17 And more so for those of us with vaginas than guys with penises, because they talk about their penises all the time, right? And their balls and their whatever. And that's just like acceptable. But when we talk about our periods or, God forbid the clitoris, like, people lose their damn heads. And I think it's changing. And I think it is because of things like TikTok that, you know, we see these great content
Starting point is 00:24:38 and people are saying things. Some people in society think that, you know, society is falling apart because we're saying these things more. And it's not the case at all, right? We've all been having sex and doing these things for thousands of years. It's just that now we're talking about it and we could do it more safe. and with consent. Like, isn't that the goal? Is that, yeah, is that not the goal? That's what I remember my parents were both pretty, pretty open about talking about these things. I felt comfortable talking to them. And so when I went to be the Bachelorette, I thought, well, it's just a known thing that like in the fantasy suite, most likely, you're probably going to have sex because you're trying to find a life partner if that's part of like a relationship.
Starting point is 00:25:20 for you. We talk in the fantasy suites about really, really deep things like political beliefs and religion and money. And so sex to me was such an obvious part of, you know, the conversation and part of the fantasy suites. And people could not believe that I was just open to talk about that and to admit that I did it. And it was like this, I got shamed more than, I mean, of course, more than I've ever been shamed in my life because there was a buttload of people watching. Right, exactly. It was crazy to me because I was like, wait, is that not just something we all do and talk about? Okay.
Starting point is 00:25:57 Yeah. And I mean, and we do, right? Like, we do like with our best friend or whatever. And people think that if you talk about it, your kids are going to do it more or you're, you must be, you know, having sex with everything that walks, right? And we know that when we talk about it with kids, it doesn't make them more likely to have sex. It just means that when they do it, they'll like actually, again, be informed and be safe. But that's, you know, people have been trying to silence women for however long it is because they know that. once we feel fully empowered in our bodies, then nobody can really hold us back. And that's a very
Starting point is 00:26:24 scary thing to a patriarchal society. Like, let's be real. That is so true. That is so true. And I just feel like, yeah, it is getting better, of course, but still feels like a long way to go. But I really do see change and, you know, obviously people being more open to talking about it and wanting to talk about it and wanting to learn more. Speaking of shame, I feel like so many people have shame or worry when they go to their OB, GYN, Y, N that they're judging us. Like, it's what, you know, we have been made to think. But I'm assuming that's never really the case. Maybe sometimes, but like, I'm assuming that's never really the case. But what should you do if you feel like they are judging you? Because I have heard a couple nightmare stories. One of my girlfriends was leg hair shamed when she was in there.
Starting point is 00:27:10 Oh, my God. Like certain things. So what should you do if you feel like they are judging you or if a doctor just isn't listening? You could just accidentally kick them when your foot's in the feet. interrupts. I mean, I don't, don't say I said that. No, no, I do not condone physical violence. I instead prefer being passive aggressive. No, I'm kidding. I hate that. But I know it's true, right? Because, again, I'm not an idiot. I don't think everybody's perfect. And one of the things I've seen on TikTok and elsewhere is when people share their real experience with me with me. And I go, oh, my goodness, this is ridiculous. Because, yeah, there is no room for shame in the doctor's office, especially in our office where you are, you know, literally being exactly.
Starting point is 00:27:48 examined in your most intimate parts. You're talking about things that might feel shameful. You're talking about sex and orgasms and periods. That is a, that is like a sacred thing. Like, you should not be shaming anybody. So if that happens to you and you feel that you're being treated that way, feel free to find somebody else. And feel free to give feedback if you want to or just, you know, you also, it's not your job to fix everybody. But I mean, even myself, I've left doctors before who I thought were complete jerks. So it happens. Oh, yeah. But it shouldn't. And I want people to know that, that it shouldn't. And I did make a whole YouTube video about what to do, like what to expect, because I think
Starting point is 00:28:21 when you know what to expect, you can be like, wait a minute, that's not what I expected. But also, if you're somebody who's a trauma survivor, because I think that's a whole special thing to then walk into that office. So when it comes to leg hair, when people apologize to me, I go, well, do you want to see mine? Like, it's a mess right now. It's the winter. Like, I don't even care.
Starting point is 00:28:41 I don't care what your feet look like. Please don't feel like you need to shave for us. don't do anything special. Although can I share a really funny story about my friend. Please. Okay. So my friend, I'm just going to call her out because it's okay because she totally, she shared this with us and she's hilarious. She had to go for her annual visit on Halloween.
Starting point is 00:28:58 That was the day. She's like, I love my OBGYN so much. Like, you know, they're good friends. She's like, I'm going to put something in there so that they're totally surprised when they, you know, go down to put the speculum in. And she found like one of these little plastic skeletons and she put a skeleton in her vagina. I was like, Amber, you know, I was like, first of all, I don't think that's great for your vagal of health, but I love that. A spooky checkup. It was a totally, yeah, please listeners, do not put stuff in your vagina.
Starting point is 00:29:30 I have many episodes about things you shouldn't, but I just thought that was. So if you're going to prep, like, just make us laugh, but don't think you need to make it pretty down there because all the lady are great as they are and less is more. Yes, I know. And people, there's always like that, there's a chart that has went around. I forget where on TikTok maybe about like different vaginas and the way that they look. Because so many people have been made to feel shame around if it's not. Like this perfect little, I always call it a paper cut, a perfect little tight paper cut. There's so much shame around that.
Starting point is 00:30:03 I know. I know. Yeah. It's totally false. There's like the vulva looks a thousand different ways. I love the vulva gallery and the labia library, which I know sound really strange. If you look them up on Instagram, their accounts that have, like, artistic work of, like, what things actually look like, because I've gotten so many people who have messaged me and said, how can I make it shorter or whiter or lighter or tighter?
Starting point is 00:30:24 And I'm just thinking the only thing you've ever seen probably is what's in porn, which is oftentimes not the reality. And it's so sad. And I remember once seeing a cosmetic surgeon who took like a roast beef sandwich and she was saying on TikTok, like, we can make it look like this. And she tucked it in. And I lost it on her. I was like, how dare you? advertise it in this way like completely unethical and it just drove me nuts so there's a lot of misinformation out there for sure about like what it's supposed to look like what you're supposed to
Starting point is 00:30:53 do like no no just just show up to your appointment on time if you can like that's really all i'm asking for yeah okay that's so good to know i mean like i said i posted asking for questions in my off the vine facebook group and just so many flooded in and why do you think that is that there's like so many questions from people do you think that people don't want to ask their own OB these questions? I do. I also think they probably don't get enough time where they feel like they can. Yeah. Because, you know, we feel rushed and it sucks because insurance companies give you like 15 minutes. And also I get that not all doctors, you know, I know that we take all these tests and we pass all these board exams to get into medical school. And I wish that they would
Starting point is 00:31:33 just do personality tests, quite frankly, because I just want people who are nice and like can talk and be compassionate. That would be nice. And a lot of us don't get me wrong. Yeah. There are definitely some idiots. And I think they were just too afraid to ask. Only 17 states mandate that sex ed be taught in schools that is accurate. That means the rest could just make it up. Yeah, I know. It's crazy. I just don't even understand the reasoning behind that. Like, why? Because they just, you know, it's the same. It's they don't want to force. They say that this is something that should be taught in the home, blah, blah, blah. It's a lot of political stuff, which is ridiculous because it's just biology but it's been used as a wedge issue yeah but we so yeah so even where you what you even know
Starting point is 00:32:16 you should be asking about or what you can ask about depends a lot on what you're taught and if your parents weren't taught and then you go to the doctor's office and you don't even know what to ask i mean i joke i don't know if you saw that one ticot going around where like the doctor the person pretend to be the doctor walks in and is like all right show me where they are and like finds the underwear hidden under the pants and goes disgusting you know which i cracked up because even when i go i hide my underwear why no idea But I do it. I'm like, it has to be polite. Like, she's just about to, you know, literally go in my vagina. But let me hide my haines. Like that I have to do. Why? I don't know. I think we're just programmed. I think we're programmed to do. That's so true. I totally do that. I tuck it in my pants and I roll up my pants. And like I feel like that part of that to me is I was never taught about discharge about what that is how it's healthy. What is good. What is bad? Like I kind of knew it. it was normal, but I don't know how we differentiate, like, what's normal versus something
Starting point is 00:33:15 that needs to be followed up with. You know what I mean? No, that's a great question. And I would say that I get a lot of those. And I would think that what I tell people is, if you're worried about your discharge, you know, definitely let us know, but it's normal because your vagina is a self-cleaning oven, which is a really weird thing to say, but it is. You don't have to do anything. And the stuff that comes out, it's like, you know, it's like the stuff that needs to come out. So, you know, what's normal is clear, white, sometimes even a little light yellow, like a little bit, on where you are in your cycle, it can change. But the big warning signs are if it's causing you itching or burning or redness on the
Starting point is 00:33:46 skin or it's got an odor that doesn't seem quite right or if it's, you know, green or gray or it's just new in some way. And I really encourage people to come in and get it checked out because there's so much stuff that's out there to treat. And a lot of times we don't quite know what we're treating. So then we do something. We use the medicine that's wrong. And then we have a reaction.
Starting point is 00:34:07 So it can be really hard to know. But I see so much stuff out there, like, take this supplementer, put this suppository in, and it'll, you know, smell like a dackery or whatever. And like, that can not be good. It's not good. That's, I mean, there's so many, so many people wanted to know, several people asked if there's anything that you recommended to increase sex drive. Because, again, I have seen some things where it's like supplements or pills or put it on
Starting point is 00:34:35 here. But do you have anything that you recommend? I know. I don't. I'm sorry. Because here's the thing, the biggest, the biggest organ when it comes to your sex drive is not your clitoris, your vagina. It's your brain. Which doesn't mean like, well, that's it. I give up now. Like my brain sucks. Right. But it's really sex is a complicated thing in terms of drive. And so I think it's one of those things where if you're struggling, that's something worth talking about with your OBGYN or with somebody who has specific training in that, like a therapist or a sex therapist. Yeah. Which sucks because it's so much easier to take a pill or supplement, right? But like the stuff that's out there, they can have lots of side effects.
Starting point is 00:35:10 They're not regulated. I will say that there is a really great book called Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski. And what I love about that is she really dives into this and talks about the accelerator and the brakes. So sometimes it's an issue with your accelerator is not accelerating, but sometimes it's other issues where the breaks, you know, anytime you're a little bit tired or a little bit stressed, it squashes down your sex drive. So really teasing out where the issue is, whether it's a relationship.
Starting point is 00:35:35 issue or a pain issue, a pelvic floor issue, a lubrication issue, or something else, like depression, anxiety. Those are all valid. Right. Right. And there is one drug that's approved right now for what's called hypoactive sexual desire disorder, I believe, called adi. Yeah, I was going to ask you about that pill. Yeah. So it is FDA approved. The thing is that there's a lot of side effects associated with it. So you cannot drink when you're taking it because it causes your blood pressure to drop a little bit, especially with people who were drinking. And so they were passing out. And there's some other side effects, too. So it can help some people. But I think it's one of those things that should not be like the, you know, oh gosh, call that in for me before we do anything else.
Starting point is 00:36:16 I think it needs to be part of a bigger picture of what's going on. So. Yeah, that's true. There's so many factors that can come into play when it comes to like your sex drive. That's so true. And someone asked, how often should we be replacing our underwear? Asking for a friend that's definitely not me. and most definitely doesn't have pairs that are several years old. No shame in the underwear question game because I actually made a TikTok maybe like six months ago now
Starting point is 00:36:43 rebutting one made by an OBGYN who said you needed to replace your underwear like every three to six months and you also need a special and you needed a special detergent that she happened to make to clean your under bruise which again what do we say what are they profiting from this?
Starting point is 00:37:00 Yes. And I don't think you need to change your underwear every three months unless you're crapping your pants on a regular basis like hello you want my advice when you got holes in them because that's what I do and my husband makes fun of me and he's like Jen seriously look at this and I was like well if I get in a car crash they'll know at least you know I probably was the one driving responsibly because look at these underwear but honestly it's like whenever whenever you feel there's no magic time to you know it's not like they have an expiration but definitely I have seen that question before
Starting point is 00:37:32 so it's a good one. Really? Okay. Okay. I want to know this one, too. What is the most interesting question you've received from a patient or podcast listener? Okay. I had a question. This is a long, long time ago, so I don't feel bad about talking about it. I had a question from a patient who was really worried she could get pregnant after having anal sex. And she really didn't believe me that there was no way. And also she had her tubes tied. And so I felt like we had a lot of... opportunity for education. I was like, ma'am, I think you're good to go. And, but let's, you know,
Starting point is 00:38:08 let's talk about the physiology and the anatomy of like how this is going to work. And she was reassured after our conversation. But I just remember thinking, like, you know, wow, we've really missed an opportunity here to explain how things work. But, but, but, but okay, we can handle this. Right, right. Okay. Someone asked, can you tell if we've done the deed recently during an exam? there is one way we can tell maybe there's two ways okay the one way is that there's a condom in there which i've definitely seen where condoms have slipped off and people have forgotten um the other is if for some reason you maybe you think you have an infection and i do a little swab and i put it under a microscope and i can see sperm swimming around um and sometimes that's like a fun little like bingo
Starting point is 00:38:52 car i'm like hey look what i found it you know um yeah that's really the only way but if i'm just looking, no, because it all kind of looks like discharge or whatever. So yeah. So your secret is safe unless I have to look under a microscope usually. That would be so interesting looking under a microscope and seeing sperm like swimming. It's kind of fun. I love it. Yeah. My job, I get to look under the microscope for a few things. My favorite is when you come in if you're pregnant and you're worried, your bag of water broke. Same thing. We do a little swab. And it looks like little crystallized ferns. We call it burning when the amniotic. fluid dries on the slide. And it's really beautiful. And it like happens in real time.
Starting point is 00:39:32 And it's, I don't know, it's super cool. But that and sperm are like equally fun to see and just like, yeah, I've done it. Yeah. A few people asked why do so many doctors want to schedule C sections and inductions now versus letting the body go into labor on their own like they did in the past. Yeah, I know. That question makes me sad because we shouldn't be. I know in the hospital where I work, you can't unless you've got a real reason. So. you know, your baby is breach or you've had a prior C-section and you want another one and you don't want to labor. We are actually very strict and most hospitals are because we're trying to not schedule inductions unnecessarily or do C-sections unnecessarily. So we have a pretty strict set of
Starting point is 00:40:14 screening where we can't just be like, oh, I happen to be on labor and delivery that day, so we're going to schedule it my day. Like, that just wouldn't work. Yeah. But I also work at a place that's very evidence-based and I know that the quality can certainly vary. So I mean, the American College of OBGYN is very much against this practice of randomly picking a date just because it's, you know, a date that you know is happening. But I also know that not everybody is as evidence based in that way, which bugs me. And I would love to see us improve, especially in places like rural communities and other places where people may not have as much choice. So if you were ever concerned that's happening to you, you can go on to the American College of OBGYN website and, you know, Google inductions and C sections. And they've got some information there about like reasons for, you know, to have one or reasons not to. I think it's important. Yeah. Because it's okay to say no. It's okay to say no. And we're just getting a second opinion. Yeah. I think that's important for people to hear like it is okay to say no in that situation because I mean, so many different beliefs or wants or needs or whatever and situations. But to me, what my brain does is go, shouldn't your body go into labor when it's unless there's, again, health issues and reasons to do it. Yeah. That's absolutely the ideal. Yeah. Yeah. And, you know, there are different. situations like you said, or maybe somebody's got high blood pressure or complications, and that's a
Starting point is 00:41:32 reason. But if there's not any reason and you can't get a good answer, it's okay to say, I'd like to think about this or what happens if I don't do this? You know, what are the risks and benefits? And I think it's an ongoing conversation for sure. Is there like proof or like anything fact based out there where it is better to naturally go in to have, yeah. Yeah, yeah. We know that if you have an induction of labor, you have a higher chance of a C-section, you know, and all the things that come with a prolonged, you know, longer labor, like higher risk of hemorrhage and bleeding and that kind of stuff. Now that said, people who medically need one, the good news is we're pretty good about being able, you know, to be successful, but not always. And we do. We just know that we call
Starting point is 00:42:13 spontaneous labor. You walk in, you're doing your thing. Like, we love that. We know that that's going to work out better for everybody if that's the case, which is why, yeah, if you've got nothing going on, like, yeah, then don't, don't just randomly schedule a random date because that's not good for everybody. Oh, this feels like a heavy one. I think for everybody, it's no surprise that holidays are one of the busiest and most stressful times of the year. But the gift of therapy has actually allowed me to enjoy the holidays. And I want to share that gift so badly with people right now. And that's thanks to TalkSpace. Talkspace offers both therapy and psychiatry from the comfort of your phone. And you can reach out to your provider at any time. It's kind of like
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Starting point is 00:45:01 Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates National Annual Average Insurance Savings by new customers surveyed who saved with Progressive between June 2020 and May 2021. Potential savings will vary and discounts not available in all states and situations. Someone said, please get her to talk about how important pelvic floor specialists slash physiotherapists are and what they do. She said, I feel like so many women have pain during sex or think it's normal to have a weak bladder after having a baby when these things could be improved. Totally. Yeah. Do you know that in other countries like France, everybody gets to go to a pelvic floor physical therapist after they have their baby? Imagine that. Wouldn't that be nice?
Starting point is 00:45:49 That would be really nice. Yeah, we have them, but you don't automatically go to them unless you know to ask or you have a complication usually, like a really bad tear or you're leaking urine or you've got other symptoms. And I'm a huge fan of prevention as opposed to treatment. So I think it's a great tool to have. And if you go on TikTok, like there's so many good pelvic floor physical therapists there, which never does that replace like an actual provider. But it's super cool to see like here's the things that they do. especially if you're walking in, you're like, they're going to do what with my what? Like, you can see kind of the issues they fix, how they work, things that you can look out for.
Starting point is 00:46:25 And then you can ask and be like, you know, I go to your doctor and say, I'm really concerned about this. Would you give me a referral? And there's, there's a lot out there. And that's another thing that I think people are getting more aware of because as an OBGN, your best friend is a good anesthesiologist and then a really good pelvic floor physical therapist because so much of pain with sex, pelvic floor pain stuff, especially you having a pelvic floor physical therapist who can diagnose and guide treatments, I think is huge. It's not just a one, you know, a one person job. It's a team kind of thing. Yeah. I have, um, the, what was I, there's a word for it and I'm blanking on it right now,
Starting point is 00:47:02 but I actually do have pain from my pelvic floor during sex. And she said, there's a name for it where she was like, oh my gosh, you're like, insides are just so tense and tight. And she, Was it vaginismus? Yes. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:19 That's a huge thing. And yeah. And you don't know it when you're walking around. You don't feel it, you know? No. Like it's a completely different area. And pelvic floor physical therapists are fantastic at diagnosing it, treating it with biofeedback. Everybody thinks that it's just about Kegels.
Starting point is 00:47:34 And honestly, Kegels is great for some people, but can make things worse for others, like people with vaginismists who need to relax their muscles. Yeah, I cannot relax my muscles. I cannot. and it makes going to get a physical so painful. I get such bad anxiety. My whole body tenses up. I like want to have a panic attack.
Starting point is 00:47:54 But then the like she was saying something about how you can do, you know, like the massaging and the like certain things. But I'm like I can't even handle the thought of that. Like my like legs immediately go together right now and I go, no. Like I can't. Yeah. So what do I do? And honestly, it can be a combination of, you know, managing. and the anxiety because they become a pain spiral of you're worried about it so you clench more and then
Starting point is 00:48:19 it hurts you know it becomes sort of like a rabbit hole which is again it's valid it's not your fault but sometimes they do what we call like dilator therapy we're using these dilators but the first one you start with is like the size of your pinky and it's really tiny and you just get to a point where you can just kind of put it there and you know kind of let the muscles kind of chill and you kind of get there they also do this thing called biofeedback where they can actually have a little they can teach your muscles how to react so you'll see on a screen when the muscle is contracting, and then you can see when it relaxes, and then you can try to connect the brain-body connection with that. Oh, wow. Yeah. It's, and, you know, it's not just like,
Starting point is 00:48:52 oh, relax your arm. Like, we can do that. It's a different set of muscles that are innervated differently. So it's very much, it requires a different kind of treatment, but people really have great success with their pelvic floor PTs for vaginasmus. I think I need to do that. I think, I think I need to just do that because, yeah, I've been, I've been looking into it lately. I forgot that name, but you can, like, film a podcast like while you're there. I'd be like, and here we are. we're doing this. I'll hold your hand. We'll distract you. It'll be great. I would. I would do that. That actually sounds like something I would do. I have an appointment to get an ultrasound because I truly think I have PCOS. I also have PMDD and like the combination
Starting point is 00:49:33 of those two things. But I have so much shame around the imbalances of something going on with my hormones because of the hair growth, the like male pattern hair growth. And I feel like a lot of people probably wouldn't talk about that. But I'm here to say it definitely happens to me. And is there like something that you can do for that? Yes. Yeah. So I love that you even know what PMDD is.
Starting point is 00:49:58 For people who don't know, it's premenstrual dysphoric disorder. It affects about 3 to 8% of menstruating people. And what I tell people is think of it like PMS on steroids. It's a total bitch. It's not just the physical symptoms, but it's the emotional symptoms. Like some people are suicidal because of it or can't leave their house. So anxious. Can't go to work.
Starting point is 00:50:15 It's legit. It's totally real. And it's related to the hormone fluctuations. And then PCOS is polycystic ovarian syndrome, which is, you know, this kind of constellation of symptoms we usually see with people who have signs of extra testosterone so that hair growth where it shouldn't be or hair loss where it shouldn't be. You don't ovulate regularly. And so when we do an ultrasound, we may see a lot of little cysts on the ovaries because
Starting point is 00:50:36 every month one's supposed to pop. And when you have PCOS, your ovaries are like, help we don't you know we all just kind of go crazy and you may or may not ovulate and it could be that if you know if you're saying you've got that hair growth yes there are things you can do when it comes to that growth that's there already there's no medicines that'll make it go away honestly laser therapy is the best for that but you can prevent yeah that's what I do yeah and so you can do actually the birth control pill so this is one of my favorites because people say that birth control just covers things up it doesn't get to the root and I'm thinking well so does insulin but we
Starting point is 00:51:07 still use it for diabetes like you know yeah give me a break like birth Controls medicine. And here's an exact reason why. So people with PCOS take it for two reasons. One is it stops future hair growth, which is super awesome if you don't need to deal with that. And the other is that it helps to stop this weird hormone kind of craziness. And then you don't ovulate. And then it actually puts you at an increased risk for cancer of the uterus because the lining kind of gets all confused. And birth control helps to simmer it down. So it can kind of help with all of that. And there's other medicines, too, that you can use for PCOS, like spiroinolactone and other things like that. And when we think of PCOS, people, you know, oftentimes think of somebody who weighs a little
Starting point is 00:51:46 bit more and think that, oh, just lose weight and you'll be fine. And what we know is that there's really like two different kinds of PCOS. Those that we do see and weight loss can help. And then others who are, you know, have a normal body mass index and that's not an issue at all. And I think those are the people who often get diagnosed later because they don't fit kind of our idea of what PCOS is. So yeah, so an ultrasound could help you see kind of what's going on with your ovaries. And then there's certain criteria that we use. So if you've got a certain amount of cysts and you have male growth, male pattern, hair growth, and that could be it. And then your doc could talk with you about different kinds of treatments. And then knowing down the road, it could affect
Starting point is 00:52:21 fertility. So kind of making a game plan if and when, you know, that sort of thing. That's what my fear is. But it's good that you're on top of it. Yeah. I am. I'm on top of it. But I have, yeah, I have a fear that's because I know I have cysts on my ovaries and I get such painful cramps that's like crippling and all these things and I get the male pattern hair growth but then at the same time I'm very my period is very regular it's very like clockwork and I ovulate every month so I'm like I don't know what it is yeah yeah let's get a little more info is a good idea for sure so exactly last question is your thoughts or preferences on cups tampons or pads there's so many you know thoughts out there on tampons
Starting point is 00:53:03 being bad for you, but what is your preference? Yeah. I love them all and I'll throw in the period underwear there too. Yeah. Listen, periods aren't always so fun. So whatever you choose and you want to use, like go for it. They're all safe. I know there's information, you know, there's fear out there about tampons and toxic shock syndrome, which is a, you know, a really bad infection.
Starting point is 00:53:22 But those were more the older tampons. The newer ones we have, it's actually very rare. And you're more likely to get that from, you know, like having a recent surgery or an infection elsewhere as opposed to using tampons and cups are the same very super safe so i say whatever whatever works for you whatever makes you happy they don't need to be organic tampons are regulated medical devices so they're super safe so whatever you like and you know you can afford because we live in this country where things are taxed and it's crazy i know don't get me started i know i know my girlfriend talk about that all the time yeah is it that's well you should do have you
Starting point is 00:53:59 done a podcast on that? I have not. That's not. No, I have not done one yet. So if anybody here is listening and wants me to talk about period poverty or the luxury tax, did you know that your tampons are considered basically a yacht and are taxed in the same way? Because it's considered a freaking luxury good. Like, yes, ask all the questions and we will, oh, we'll discuss. Well, on that, no, where can people reach out and ask you questions? Yeah, I think honestly, the easiest way is go to my Instagram at Dr. Jennifer Lincoln, DR Jennifer Lincoln, and just shoot me a voice message into my DMs. And that's, you know, kind of the easiest way. Or you can go to my podcast web page at Dr. Jennifer Lincoln.com. And you can scroll down there and see the phone number, call and leave a voicemail.
Starting point is 00:54:38 I promise I won't answer it and make you talk to me. And you be like, oh, my God, she picked up. But it goes right to a voicemail where, you know, I kind of batch the questions together and ask a few. And you can listen to me anywhere you get your podcast, just the let's talk about down there podcast. Okay. I love that. I actually can't wait to listen. I feel like I'm going to get so much information of it. So it's been, it's been a minute for myself, but I used to do a segment on my podcast called Can You Not. I started running out of things to complain about with can you not. So I was like, maybe I'll take a break on that because I just was like, I don't know how many more things I can like hate on. But I wanted to do because the Vino's suggested doing a
Starting point is 00:55:15 can you not segment with you. So, can you not? Your biggest can you nots when it comes to being an OBGYN or anything related to your field. Like, as a patient, I would be like, I got him. I got him. I got them. Are you ready? You came prepared. I was thinking about mine as a patient.
Starting point is 00:55:36 I was like, can you not have like the worst neon lighting in the offices? Like I'm like, I want like, I guess you need to see, but like I just want like a like a nice more like not hospital vibes lighting. I agree. I agree. Can you not give us those shitty paper gowns that rip the second you. move a certain way, and then your nipple and you're just hanging out. And you're like, okay, thank you. Yes. Why can't we be comfortable, especially for people with anxiety around it like me. I'm like, I just want to be comfy and cozy. I completely agree. Can you not have it
Starting point is 00:56:08 where the bed is facing the door and somebody walks in and you just get a full view? Like happened at my first exam at the county clinic in college because I needed birth control because I was a whore, you know, and I had to go, I had no idea what to do. Of course, shame. And they open it up. Exactly. And there's no curtain and the waiting room. And I'm just like, this is what happens when you have sex. Like, this is terrible. Oh, that is, wait, that's really terrible. That's never happened to me.
Starting point is 00:56:32 But I will say one of mine was, can you not fan girl while inside of me? Because one time I was, because I went through the process of freezing my eggs. And I had, yeah. Yes, I'm so happy I did it. Best thing ever. And I had an ultrasound. This girl was giving me an ultrasound. And she was like, I just, I have to.
Starting point is 00:56:52 say, I'm fan-girling right now over you. And I was like, you're like literally wandering inside of me. And it was wild. I have a similar situation where I was doing a speculum exam, somebody who came in and her sister was there. And as I put this speculum in, I'm looking at the cervix. She's like, is this you on YouTube? And shows me like a thumbnail of me.
Starting point is 00:57:11 And I'm like, I don't feel like now is the time. Yeah, it's not the time. Read the room. Can you not? Oh, God. Could you please not? The nurse was like to. And, of course, she's, like, cracking up as we walk out of the room.
Starting point is 00:57:24 And I was like, you don't tell anybody that happened. And of course, now here I am telling you. Well, it's the segment of the podcast. You had to. Exactly. All right. I have one good, can you know, that I want to make sure. Can you not just tell women to keep their legs closed if they don't want to get pregnant
Starting point is 00:57:40 because I am so sick and tired because last time I checked, you needed a sperm to get pregnant. So why are we not talking about the men's legs? That is my, mm-hmm. Yeah, that's a really freaking good. one. Going back to when I was shamed so bad on my season of The Bachelorette, one of the tweets I got
Starting point is 00:57:57 and they read it on live national television because they were kind of trying to like show how bad I was getting bullied. And one of the one of the many, many tweets I got about this was shut your horro legs. Like I got that all the time because I had sex.
Starting point is 00:58:14 Right. How dare you? How dare you? Could you imagine? Yeah. And like the it was like a known thing that The Bachelors had sex, but a bachelorette talking about it, it was shut your whore legs. Yeah, basically. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:27 And welcome to America. Scene. Yeah. Seen. No, and that's why we need to normalize talking about this stuff, talking about birth control and sex and abortion and pregnancy and, you know, pain with sex, all these things. Because when we normalize it, then we give people the vocabulary to see it's not shame or stigma-based. And that's why I'm doing what I'm doing. I love that you're using your platform because the more we do it, the next generation of girls,
Starting point is 00:58:51 They're not going to define themselves based on the status of their vagina or virginity, which is made up. It's, you know, it's totally a double, you know, it's just so hypocritical how guys are, you know, they're the players and we're the sluts and that ship has sailed, my friend. Yeah, I'm over that that ship that can go go away now. I want to do a really quick, because I could probably talk to you for another like five hours about everything, but I wanted to do a really quick factor fiction, OBGYN addition. Love it. Just like a little game of debunking. and confirming some of the myths that we see on social media and beyond. Okay, first one.
Starting point is 00:59:31 Fact or fiction. There's no need to go to an OBGYN unless you're pregnant or trying to get pregnant. Fiction. Fiction. Yes. Please come see us. And even though PAP smirs aren't an annual thing, we still want to see you every year. We do lots of stuff.
Starting point is 00:59:44 We can talk about preconception planning, birth control periods, sex, all the things. Yes, please come see us. We'd love to have you. This is a question I was thinking about the other day because I have an appointment around my period. Should you reschedule your gyno appointment if you're on your period? Okay. I cannot stand it when OBGYNs make you reschedule because they say that if you have a PAP test, it's unlikely that you'll need to come back and do it again because the period blood will screw it up.
Starting point is 01:00:11 No, that's false. That's with the older generation of PAP tests, but people still practice that. And I hate it because you know how hard it is to get into the day? damn office and, like, get your life together and then they have to reschedule. And they're like, our next appointment is in nine months. So I say no, but I also tell people, I made a TikTok about this and people lost their minds. They're like, my doctor does this all the time. And it's like, well, then I hate your doctor. But I think it's good to call and check with the evidence-based answer is no. Okay. Okay. That's so good to know. I'm going to call and check, see what mine says.
Starting point is 01:00:41 And then I might find a new one. Okay. Fact or fiction, you can still get pregnant if you have PCOS. You can. That is a. fact, yes. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Being on birth control, long-term can affect your fertility. Fiction. I could make a TikTok every day about this, and still people will want to know because it's just such,
Starting point is 01:01:03 it's such a myth. And that's so good to know. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yep. It's, um, trust me, we have the studies and it's just, it's not true. In fact, in some ways, it could even protect your fertility because some of these methods thicken your cervical mucous and make it less likely that bugs like gonorrhine and
Starting point is 01:01:19 chlamydia, which could affect your fertility, can even get up there. So take that crazy people on TikTok who are, you know, driving me crazy. I bet you get a lot of those. I bet you get a lot of those. Oh, gosh. Factor fiction, sexual desire decreases as you age. I would say it depends. For some people, actually, sexual desire goes up once they are no longer, well, once they no longer have small children in the house, which is actually the time that you are the least likely to have sexual desire. I don't know why. And also, once you go through menopause for some people, they actually find that desire can
Starting point is 01:01:58 go up because there's not that fear of pregnancy. So it depends. Yeah, I guess so. That's fair. That's fair. And last but not least, I am going to ask you for your confession. My confession. Okay, this is bad. Okay. Well, it's bad to somebody like me. I don't know when my last pap smear was. And I'm an OBGYN. And I feel. I know. Okay. But here's why. Here's why I'm okay with it. Because I know it's within the last five years. And that's when I know I need it. And I also have a great OBGYN when I go. She'll tell me when I need it. But I'm hard. I should know this. And I could log on and check it. But I just know that she cares about my cervix. And she'll keep an eye on it. But you should be better than me. And you should know. If I used to it, that's actually a really great confession for an OBG.
Starting point is 01:02:50 I know. I just feel like somewhere like I just lost my board certification probably, but it's fine. No. Oh my gosh. That's crazy. Yeah. I'm like, because I had cis on my ovaries, I feel like, I like get paranoid. I'm like, I need to go every year or I like start to panic. But. Yeah. Yeah. No, I promise I go every year. I just, I'm like, I don't know if I need a path this year. And I was like, Marian, just tell me what's going on down there. And she's like, I got you, Jen. Thank you. I'm glad somebody knows what's happening down there because I'm worried about everybody else's. I'm not worried about my own. Well, thank you so much.
Starting point is 01:03:24 I feel like my listeners are going to learn so much and love this. And then hopefully they'll be inspired to go listen to your podcast and learn even more. So I appreciate your time so much. This was incredible. And I love like your rawness and your realness and your honesty and your humor. Everything about like, I was like, I wish you were in Tennessee. Thank you so much. This is so fun.
Starting point is 01:03:45 I'm Caitlin Bristow. I'll see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Off the Vine. Don't forget to rate, review, and follow on your favorite podcast platform. And we'll see you next Tuesday. All month long on Pluto TV, stream the biggest Tyler Perry movies free. Watch your favorites like Medea's witness protection and Medea's big happy family. Join Tyler Perry as he goes on a couple's retreat with Sharon Lee.
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