Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Drunk Dial: Keltie Knight

Episode Date: June 7, 2019

On the 12th installment of Drunk Dial Kaitlyn is joined by fellow Canadian and one of the hosts of the Lady Gang, Keltie Knight! Staying true to the name the ladies come into this episode feeling good and ready to hit the digits when they make phone calls to first Keltie's mom and then Mama B to hear some childhood shenanigans. You will not want to miss a second as Keltie gets hit with some rapid fire questions. They even come up with what their joint podcast name would be. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Drunkdile today is coming to you from Nashville with Kelty Knight. Hello, I'm Kelty Knight from the Lady Gang. You know me. You know me from The Bachelor Season 15. You know me from The Bachelor Season 15 with Brad Womack slash Doesn't Like Girls. Yes.

I'm not being sexist, but I don't think. Brad's into women. This is what drunk dial is all about. You know what? Drunk tile should always be the way it is right now because we did two podcasts and we're drunk. Which means we've done what's in your drawers. We've done, I don't know, don't look in there. Oh shit. We've done, explain what's in there to people. Okay. In Caitlin's drawers is, wait, two pillow sprays. Wait, I want this. Oh, sure. You know what it is? It's a gift drawer and thank you for being my guest. Okay, this is a pillow spray. I'm taking it back to my hotel. It's lavender. We got a marker. We got a marker. We We got a book called Get It Together.

Good luck with that, Kailen. Okay. Wait, do we call people? Usually, but because this is on the fly, we're not doing that. What's in that drawer? Okay, in this drawer, we have a middle finger keychain. We got a- You want that tour, we too old for that.

Cork screw. Oh, yeah. Oh, and then you have a nice card for someone that says, I can count on you like underboob sweat in August. Perfect. That's nice. And then you have a card from L.G. Oh.

Okay. Oh. I hope you enjoy your new tote. Someone sent you a tote. I love it. Okay. She loves it. And there's all much of screws.

Oh, that's because I'm a modern day woman and I'm doing some shit. Okay. Let's try the pillow spray. Okay. Thank you for being on drunk down. Well, don't you have to call people? No, thank you for being drunk. I mean, okay, who should.

Let's call like somebody we know. Okay. Oh, shit. Who should we call? Let's call your mom. Oh. Do you want to call my mom? Yeah, call Sheila.

Okay, let's call. Oh, we just inhale back. Okay, can I have my phone, Sasha? Please, we have to get the phone. I feel like I call my mom and drunk out all the time. Oh, you do? Let's call Sheila. Okay, and let's call one more person.

Okay, who are you? Oh, look at Robin. He's running. Okay. Do you have anyone else who should call? Should we call Brad Wormack? Oh. Do you know him?

Do you have his number? No. Okay, no. I got kicked off on the first night. Okay, let's call Sheila. Let's call Sheila. Hold on. Okay, hold on.

Let's see. What time is it in Canada? Oh, it's good timing. Also, let's say that for anyone listening right now, you have to listen. No, you have to listen to our podcast on Tuesday. Yeah. Before this makes sense.

Yeah. Okay. I think my mom's at the lake, but let's try the house first. Okay. Put her up to the phone. Okay. Her name's Sheila.

Well, does know. Yeah. What's wrong? I'm going to issue in your ear, bud? I think he's got an ear in fact. I don't think she's going to answer. Really?

I hope so. Hello. Hey, Mom, it's Kelty. Yes, I didn't expect you. I thought it would be Auntie Wendy. Oh, yeah, no, it's me. Guess where I am, Mom? Where?

I'm in Nashville, and we're doing Caitlin's podcast right now, and you're on speakerphone. That's a good thing to say front up right at the beginning. Hi, Sheila! Okay, so, Mom, tell us the story of you remember about Caitlin and I, young people. This show is called Drunk Dial, and it's supposed to be we call drunk people drunk.

But we're not drunk, so we're just calling you, Mom. Totally. I honestly. You don't remember anything about us? It's so mean. She doesn't remember me. It's so messed up.

Do you not remember, Kayle? I'm not memorable. Um, this is the best. Do you remember when we were a kid models, Mom? Yes, I remember when you were a kid models.

You do tell us about that. And where's the best and the prettiest? Tell us about that. You were what? Tell us about when we were the best and the prettiest at the downtown Edmonton Hotel. Well, you were very small and you wore something that matched in plaid.

Oh, yes, I do. And a little plaid outfit. And Caitlin had on something that was red and blue, I think, with ribbons in her hair. And I think that was the time that Caitlin was scared

and wouldn't let Grandma Hayes babysit her I love Grandma Hayes and you, on the other hand, wanted to just be in the audience and backstage at the same time and on the stage what else can I think?

I remember the song we performed our modeling too. You do? Mr. Sandman. What was it? Mr. Sandman, bring me a treat. Yes, it was. That's not the song, Mom. That's what I'm talking about. I'm talking about Mr. Sandman, bring me a treat.

Make it a cutest that I've ever seen. I can remember that. I remember that you always used to want to play Barbies at all of your birthday parties. You or me. Caitlin, right? Both of them. Both of you. of them?

Both of my sister. My sister. Oh, Haley. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we loved Barbies, Mom. We grew up in the 90s. I didn't like Barbies.

You didn't like Barbies? No, I didn't. Kaylyn said she doesn't like Barbies. You're remembering incorrectly? Maybe it was Haley. I love dolls. She loved dolls. Maybe it was Haley.

And you didn't like Barbies after Matt cut all the heads off of all of yours. That's my brother, guys. It's dark. It's dark. Come on. Okay. Well, that's okay. No, Mom, you're doing so good. No, that was so good. I want to ask you one more thing on drunk dial.

Mom, are you ever surprised that Kailen and I are multimedia moguls? We're goddamn Steve Jobs of podcasting. I know. No, I am not surprised because at any given time, it was always a crapshoot as to which one of you wanted more attention. You never really wanted to let the other guy have it But you were nice enough kids That you didn't make it too awkward Wow, that's amazing Always center of attention people

You know why we're both threes on the enagram mom We're both threes Yeah, makes sense That's not surprising Yeah. Kaelin has a new guy. His name's Jason. He's hot. Well, wow. Good for... Oh, where did you meet him? She met him on the Bachelor. He's from the Bachelor. He's been in the Bachelor, but he's a job, so it's different.

Yeah. Oh, good. Yeah. Well, that's nice. Oh, my God. I love her. Sheila, you're so sweet. You are having fun. And, gee, I haven't been drunk, dog, in probably 55 years. Okay. Love you, Mom. Bye. Oh, Mom, go to Kaylin's Instagram. She got a new dog today. It's really cute. Bye. Love you. Call you tomorrow. Bye. Okay. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you drunk dial.

Wait. Sheila's iconic. Wait. Sheila is like calmly. She's calm. She hates me. She's like, I had enough of you as my daughter. She's so calm yet like she can She's sat like she'll throw you under the bus She'll give a little sass And she'll be very calm about it Like she's not like she's like Chris Jenner She's like oh she's like

Okay honey I'm trending on Twitter That's what she lists She was like I don't even know what the internet is But I do know that I read That you are an idiot Where my mom would be like Bada, that's it. No, your mom is,

Here's the thing. I want to tell you a story about your mom really quick on drunk dial. So excited. And then less. Okay. So the only award

I ever won in my dance career as a child was at the Dancing in the Park Dance Competition. That was my favorite. Oh, what? Hi, Gold Award.

Remember that girl? Dancing in the Park dance competition. There's one girl who handed out awards and she'd go, she go, Married Award.

Silver Award. gold award High gold award several let you get higher She's too excited Diamond Award Okay well I don't remember that girl

Anyway your mom judged it one year Yeah When I was in it Yeah And it's the only time in my life I ever won anything And I feel like Because our parents were friends

It might have been You know what She couldn't judge A lot of my dance competitions Yeah So calls Leslie I want to know If my modern solo

In sixth grade was the best modern solar she's ever seen. I want to know if I deserve the dancing with the stars. I mean, not dancing with the stars. Dancing in the park. Hello?

Mom. Hi, Leslie. Yes. Kelchie. She knows. Leslie, we ask her mom. Okay. We have a question for you. We're on Drunk Dial. You're on Drunk Dial podcast.

We just called Sheila. And she was hilarious. And she said, And Katelyn and I tell her what she's done. Kelsey goes, mom, you remember Caitlin? She goes, um, well, I remember that, uh, it was a crab shoot for who wanted more attention. So now we're talking about two peas in a podcast. Yeah, we really are.

We're two peas and a podcast. Two peas in a podcast. It's our spin off. Boom. We, wait. Two peas and a podcast is a hit. Wait. that is a that is a damn less you better trademark that

I think so I said it first shotgun shotgun you're such a Chris Jenner momager um mom Kelty wants to know if you remember what was it a stage park Dancing with the heart dancing with the dancing with the dancing in the park yeah oh I want a water

Leslie well I've judged I had yeah you judged you judge the dancer in the park because do people know that your mom was a famous ballerina yeah okay cool Okay, so you judged me, Leslie, and I won top modern solo. And I just want to know, is that because you knew me or because I was the top modern solo? No, because... There were no other modern solos. You were the best because I have judged nieces.

I have judged best friends kids like you. I do not look at the name. I look at the performance, the technique, the presentation. You are the total package Yep And she You know what You're not a rocket for nothing

You're not a NBA cheerleader for nothing You're right Yeah It was I did that Mara solo To Annie DeFranco Like my life depended on it

And I still remember I'm not questioning my ethics Because I'm not questioning your ethics Less Not when you showed up to dance in the park With a balloon sleeve onesie I knew you were serious

Your mom The 80s and 90s were meant For El Bristow Yeah I loved the 80s and 90s What happened Because she was so petite I was scrunching my hair right now

I was scrunching my hair right now It's blue Oh I thought you were going to say it's due And give your daughter a shout out But it's blue, okay And is it also a dew Okay Honeydew

Okay Anyways, yeah, yeah, well, that's funny. I can't wait to hear Sheila on there because we have lots of, we go back a long way. Also, last thing, Leslie, Mrs. Bristow. Sorry, I would never call you Leslie. It seems weird. This is Hipkin now. Oh, Hipkin, sorry.

Okay, question for you. Important question for you. Now, my mom was upset when Caitlin was on lady. Did you watch her on Lady Gang TV? Oh, she did. Sorry, but. She's very proud of it. I'm very proud of both of us for sure

But I have a question for you So my mom I said Caitlin always was dressed at the nines With like a matching bobby sock And a scrunchy And I was always wearing a hammy down Can you confirm a deny

Was Caitlin ever wearing a hammy down? Caitlin used to wear a hammy down Some of them might have been yours Oh Jokes on you I actually got your better clothes Are you saying I'm old? Because that's f*** up, Mom.

Do you say I'm older? Is you saying I'm bigger? Are you saying I'm fat? No. Okay, just checking. Oh, I think someone's at the door. Okay, better go. Okay, get the door back.

Okay, it's cutting out. Okay, bye, I love you. Can you not put me on the spot? Anyhow, okay, nice talking to girls. Okay, we love you. So my trophy wasn't in vain. No. I was the best dancer at dancing in the Shored Park, 1995.

Damn. Hi, gold award. Hi, gold award. Okay, I know what we could do. What sex? Okay, are you ready for this? You have to be honest, okay? Okay, I'm honest.

Put your hand in the air. Hand in the air. Your right one. Or do you put it on your heart? No, you're put in there. Yeah. I Kelty. I kill tea

You swear to tell the whole truth Nothing but the truth I'm hoping nothing but the tea Nothing but the tee So help me God The f*** is doodle And there you are Hi honey oh I don't want to come on

The last text message that you sent Here it comes And it is Jew say Yes You said I have to do Caitlin's podcast to Becca Five set away Oh it's to me

Boring Okay last time you got too drunk Oh actually I was yeah I was talking to Sarah Yuri Who's that? She's a girl And she was like

I think I just drove by AJ From the Baxter Boys Because she knows how much I love him And I said no he's in Europe I don't know that And she goes I have him on fine my friends And she said

Our photographer Who's out with marshmallow Was staying at the same hotel him and they had a random conversation outside in Sweden and I said he is weird and she said he told him my friend sir would want you to tell me hi oh and I said mm-hmm you said mm-hmm that's a lie you're leaving the juicy part out no I just like AJ is so weird oh god what that's it I'm just saying AJ's weird in a good way or bad in like a like don't marry him kind of way oh shit what I did a whole podcast on how I

I heard him talking so highly about his wife on a plane Yeah But like I talk only shit about Chris And I love him the most Okay I'm a little suspect

Of people that never share the gritty of their life You know Like I love AJ and I think he's great But I think he's a handful of a man Okay And that's a lot of man to take care of Like her job Is to take care of that man

Okay My job is to take care of me beside a man. Different. Boom. Shock. That's greatness right there, Sosh. And you know what? Here's what people need to know for Tuesday's podcast.

Boom. You need a warm towel of a man. Get a warm towel of a man. That can be on your record. I'm looking for a man like a warm towel, yeah. Wow. You are the songwriters. Wrap me up into come kind of love.

Yeah. Like advice Put me in the dryer And out of the shower Yeah Yeah Want to wrap me up In that warm tire love

And my name is Adele Last argument you started I was really mad When I was camping with my husband Chris Because he tried to act like he knew What the fuck was up with tents You don't know I'm from Canada

did you have to take two years of outdoor education yes i did yeah exactly can you build a mother fucking lean to right now kately bristow guess what yes i can because yeah you can on the bachelor one of our dates one of our dates was going camping and i was like they're setting me up for success success they wanted me to i went in i loved call of duty i loved playing call of duty i went in they're like guess what your date is tonight you're killing zombies in paintball second date i was like my ideal date is camping I wrote it on my sheet they're like guess what you're doing tonight you're going camping and I set up the tent before anybody else yeah and then I laid in it and my bikini went does anybody need help yeah yeah and they only showed that part yeah no actually

they showed like a really big crotch shot oh like yeah exactly no we know about bears and camping but you didn't tell me the last argument oh I got an argument well it wasn't really an argument but I looked at Chris and I was like you idiot because he was trying to act like he he knew about tents and he was like no no this goes on the top and I was like everyone knows that you put a tarp on the ground and then your tent on top and then the rain shield on top everyone knows that if you're a camper why are you acting

and then he's like oh you know and I was like I was like from L.A wouldn't have you ever camped Is he from L.A.? Yes it's so weird He's never camped never camped last thing you've crossed off your bucket list Oh my God um singing lullabies in the back no i um actually this is very interesting so i always do a manifest list

i know you don't do new years but i do new years every year and i do a manifest list i manifest everything i love so i've been manifesting work for like a decade like all these different things i wanted to achieve and this year i really i did some work but i i i manifest a lot about like I wanted to have, so I manifested that I wanted to see and hug Spaghetti, which is my best guy friend, Jeff Gaddy, you know, dancer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

My best friend. He's a best friend. Yeah, man. Yeah. Okay. Do you remember him? Tap dancer? Yes.

Of course. Okay. He lived in New York together. Anyway, so I'm actually going home next week because it's the Shelley's dance company 50th anniversary party. And it's a surprise, so now everyone knows. Anyway, Shelley's don't listening. Anyway, she is.

No, she's definitely not. She's too, Billy is he yelling at kids to straighten their knees. Anyway, so I'm going home and I'm going to see him. And I'm so excited about that. And then also, I had a goal set for retirement. Okay. Because this year, they were like, by the time you're 40, if you've this amount of money saved, you can just compound interest and you don't have to worry about retirement.

And I save that money at 37. I know. And people never want to talk about money because they feel weird about it. No. I don't feel weird about it. save your $1, make your dollars, save your coins, save it, put it in that 401k, honey, put it away, don't touch it to you 65, it's going to triple. Okay, so let me just say that I had a financial expert.

You know Dave Ramsey? Yes, I love. His daughter was on my podcast last week and she said the same thing. She goes, having conversations about money is the most important thing you can do. I know, but it's so uncomfortable. So uncomfortable, but get comfortable with it because you don't have to like say it out on the podcast, but you can if you want. Talk about it in your relationship. it's important conversations to have it really is good for you yeah so I saved my money because I started saving my money when I was like really poor in New York and struggling dancer and I remember having like a little side savings account and I put $25 a week yeah which at the time was like the difference between me like buying groceries or not of course and I was like no I gotta save money I got to have an emergency fund then I built it built it built it and now I've reached my goal three years early so I'm so excited so I bought myself a Gucci bag as you should hey how say you be a

money no but it's if you really like budget yeah you know because i drive a fiat everyone's like i remember when i pulled in after i got my car accident i pulled in like my baby fiat into the parking lot and everyone was like you know you have a really fancy job like you should have a car that represents you and i was like the car represents me smart yes because it's two hundred and twenty dollars a month for the lease with no gas because she's electric huh and guess what all that other money i would spent on a range rover goes in the bank account into retirement bye see you when i'm on my island okay okay you are inspiring aspiring are you saving your money caylin yeah oh i'm i'm telling you keltie i was so shitty with money when i had none and now that i have some i still act like

i have no money good good girl and then and it's the best thing i've ever done good girl yeah good girl i feel like even though we're almost the same age i'm like your mom and it's weird for me I don't feel that. Is that why no one follows me on Instagram? Oh, sister? Yeah. Oh, my God, thanks. Like a twin.

It's like sometimes I think I'm too anal. People don't like me. Anyway. But I'm in Nashville. I'm in Nashville and I was at Dirkbantz, Dirk's place today. And I texted there and I was like, I'm here and eight girls came to get pictures with me. I was like so famous.

You. She said a bad. I signed someone's see-through concert bag. They were like, we signed this. I was like, trust me. You don't want me to sign this. And they're like, no, I really do. And I was like, trust me.

Yeah, I know it's weird. You are. They're going to still regret it when they Google them. I'm like, oh, 113,000? I bragged when you were in the freaking rockets that I knew you because I thought you were famous. So you're killing it. Thank you. And that's all we have to do for drunk.

That's it. It's drunk tell's over. It's like you're quickie, lady gang, quickie. Which people should all listen to. Please. That's what drunk. Wait, can I tell everyone? Please, my God.

Pump everything that you need to. Follow me on Instagram. If you enjoyed this podcast, I'm at Kelty. I have the greatest content of all time and I wear cheap-ass clothes and I will tag them all so you can look cute like me. I'm going to vouch for you. I am not fucking precious about that shit. No. I will vouch for you.

You're fun to follow on Instagram. You're real. You do funny shit. And when you have like a vagina moment on the red carpet, you show it. Right. I will show you that. Matt Gala is my vagina out? Yes.

Here's a photo of it. Now. Yeah. Exactly. and then also obviously I'm from lady gang podcast if you're not listening please listen to us the lady gang at the lady gang I truly believe all of my listeners listen to you guys no I know I think all of our listeners listen to you too I think that if you add five shows a week no one will listen to us so please don't but like like I think three Caitlin's and two lady gangs is a full week of podcasting and let's add to this that we might

have to do two peas in a podcast and we might have to do a two piece in a podcast is so important to me oh my god we might have to do um two peas and podcast is a special edition i'm not mad at what we can call each other on Skype and actually podcast together i'm not mad from nashville la it can be east coast west coast two peas in a podcast from the same goddamn town we drink tim horton's coffee and we talk about life oh my god or or we fight we just have with our fists that week we what like don't you guys do good week bad bad week good week, bad week. We can just do something.

We'll come up with our own. We're going to come up with two peas in a podcast. Are you doing the thing where you're drunk and you say you're going to do something and you don't? I've never done that in my life. I know. I was just seeing it because we both hate when people do that. I hate when people do that.

Yeah, man, I'm totally in for two peas and a podcast. I'm gone. I'm a ghost. You've never seen me in a podcast. Hey, hold on. Can you be impeccable with your word? Two peas in a podcast. It's new.

Podcast one. Because we're under contract. Okay, wait, hold on. Can you ask your followers if they would want to, two peas in a podcast? Of course they want two bees in a podcast. How do you know? Because they're beauties. Yeah.

Okay. Two peas and a podcast is two Canadian girls, both alike in attention needing. It's like Romeo and Juliet. Yes. They fight over nothing. Because they're both Canadian. Yeah. They feel exactly the same about everything because they grew up together with the

same we're competitive in the healthiest way possible we are competitive in a loving you go girl kind of way yeah ew ew it is gross your dog is cute no your dog is cute your hair is great my hair is great it's gonna be the most empowering you are so thin two peas and a pod the empower hour bye bye This week's drunk dial is sponsored by Scorch. Download the app now and don't forget to follow them at at Gets S-K-O-R-C-H.