Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Eric & Jessie James Decker | Inside Their Toughest Challenge Yet: Special Forces!

Episode Date: September 25, 2025

#879. Jessie James Decker and Eric Decker are taking us behind the scenes of their wild ride on Special Forces: World’s Toughest Test — and trust us, you’ve never seen them like this before. From last-minute casting to surviving with only three pairs of underwear (yes, really), the couple shares the grit, fears, and teamwork that got them through one of the hardest experiences of their lives.They open up about the challenges of icy water drills, makeshift bathrooms, and what it was like to push each other’s limits on camera. Jessie reveals the moment she realized Eric is the ultimate teammate, while Eric shares the surprising side of Jessie that left him saying, “damn, that’s kinda sexy.” Plus, find out which of their kids demanded they better not come home without finishing the mission.Beyond the show, Jessie and Eric get candid about 15 years of marriage, the secret values that keep them strong, and even their go-to date night (spoiler: it involves a hot tub). Jessie also teases her Christmas movie debut, new music with Joss Stone, and what’s next for her career. This episode has laughs, tears, and all the unfiltered Decker realness you love.If you’re LOVING this podcast, please follow and leave a rating and review below! PLUS, FOLLOW OUR PODCAST INSTAGRAM HERE!Thank you to our Sponsors! Check out these deals!Booking.com: Booking dot YEAH! Find exactly what you’re booking for. Book today on the site or in the app.Boll & Branch: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at BollAndBranch.com/vine20.Nutrafol: For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code VINE.Apartments.com: The Place to find a place!Wayfair: Cozify your space with Wayfair’s curated collection of easy, affordable fall updates. That’s WAYFAIR.com. Wayfair. Every style. Every home.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: (3:25) - The shocking contracts contestants have to sign before Special Forces (“if you die, it’s not their fault!”)(18:10) - Eric reveals the unexpected side of Jessie he discovered — and why it was “kinda sexy”(22:45) - Jessie outs Eric for being the cryer in the relationship!(34:45) -The Deckers get real about date nights… including naked hot tub confessionals!(38:30) - Jessie spills on her acting debut in a Christmas movie and how it all came togetherSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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booking.com has the ideal stay for anyone, even those who might seem impossible to please. So find exactly what you're booking for. Booking.com, booking dot yeah. Book today on the site or on the app. This episode of Off the Vine is brought to you by Bowling Branch. Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at bollandbranch.com slash vine 20. Nutraful for a limited time. Nutraful is offering our listeners $10 off, your first month

subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutraful.com and enter the promo code Vine. Apartments.com, the place to find a place. And Wayfair. Cozify your space with Wayfair's curated collection of easy, affordable fall updates. That's W-A-I-F-I-R.com. Wayfair, every style, every home. You're listening to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Hey, Vino's, real quick, if you are listening right now, which obviously you are, you wouldn't be hearing this, can you hit the subscribe or follow button on whatever platform you're on? Please, that one simple thing helps more than you even realize it allows me to keep growing on this podcast and making these episodes the best they can possibly be obviously for you. That's the only favorite I'm going to ever ask, okay? It truly means the world to me.

Thank you. Now let's get into it. Hey, everybody. Welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. And today we have Jesse James Decker and Eric Decker to start on the podcast where we, of course, talk special forces. If it helped their marriage or hurt their marriage, what the hardest thing was for them mentally and physically. And just how their marriage just seems to work so perfectly. It's adorable. And then Eric leaves so the girls can girl and do a little yap session. So enjoy my interview with Jesse and Eric. I was just talking to, I can't remember who it was on the pod, but I was like asking what reality. show they would do and wouldn't do, and we all agree that special forces is something I could never do. Really? I couldn't. As soon as I saw you guys in the water, I was like, nope. I couldn't. Here's the deal, though. There are certain people that are just winners. And you're a winner. You win. And it's nothing to do. It's not always about your physical capability. It's just something inside of you. That's true. And you are one of those, just like Hannah. They just win everything that they do

because they have this fire, they have this thing inside of them that will not allow them to quit. Yeah, I do have that in me, but I also have a fear of being suffocated in water. Oh, same. That was my greatest fear. So does something just come over your brain where you're just like, it's the adrenaline? Or what was going through your mind when I, because I keep seeing this preview for the underwater shit and I'm like, I don't know. The only example that I can give you because that was my greatest fear of all time. I've had nightmares of plane crashes into water, being trapped.

Like, anytime we go over bridge, I'm, like, saying the hell Mary. I'm, like, I'm scared to death. Yeah. The only thing I can compare that going numb feeling is to childbirth. Like, you don't have a choice. This is going to happen, and this is about your baby being healthy. So it's like this, and my mom calls it just being a still magnolia. You just do it.

You don't have a choice. And so when you're in the moment, during special forces like we were, you have to admit, he's way tougher than like 99% of the world, but you have to admit when you're in it, you're just doing it. There's no question. There's no time to be, you know, I'm not going to do it. I can't. Did anyone say, I'm not going to do it, I'm out? Or did everyone do it? You just do it. Everyone was pretty, this is a good season, good cast. But no, I agree. It is a great cast. They're saying it's one of the toughest cast they've ever had in the history. Really? And we were there. Let me tell you, this, this cast was

unbreakable. Wow. But let's not get it wrong. We were like afraid as well. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. Obviously going into these things is like, okay, rush of anxiety, you know, like do I do this? Obviously, the thoughts are rolled through the head, but like Joe said, just, you just do it. Oh, it's scary. I mean, you just do it, but you're turning your pants while you do it. It's terrible. Yeah. It's so scary, but yeah, you just have this thing where you're like, I just got to do it. I can't even imagine the contracts you would have to sign. Oh, yeah. you die, it's not their fault. Yeah, I mean, we even had to say that on The Bachelor, like, you could die.

Because, like, what if there's, you know, people go, like, what do they call it down a building? What is that called? Scale the building. Are you always taking choppers all the time? Yeah. Yeah. So, like, you have to in these contracts, but I can't even imagine because, oh, I just, I'm, like, this to you guys for doing it because it's, it's, this season does just run the previews. I'm like, holy shit.

And I remember you talking to me and being like, do you know anyone in Nashville that's doing it? And I really didn't. And then I'm like, oh, there's like four other Nashville people. Yeah, I was wondering if it was you. Oh, yeah, it wasn't me. So I was trying to figure out, you know, they scare you to death. They're like, you can't tell anybody what you're doing or what you're, you know. And I tried to follow those.

I didn't because I try to keep my word. Yeah, yeah. You know, when I say something. And so I was curious if it was you because I'm like, well, who else would do it? And I assumed you would. Yeah. No. I texted you.

I texted Jana. Yeah. She was like, nope. I'm like, well, who else would be doing? the show that's crazy and were you and um sean andrew close before we were already friends before but our friendship was more social hanging out now it is like very deep it is a very deep friendship i think i talk to sean every day yeah i feel like it's one of those things that you go through with somebody and you're like oh this just took our relationship to the next level it absolutely did

and if we didn't have a show like that i don't know that we it's interesting to be in this phase of life right we're in our late 30s, early 40s, and the friendships that you have made are the friendships that you're going to stick with. It's like, no, in this lifetime, in this age, we've got four kids. Like, there's just not a lot of time to foster deep relationships at this phase of life right now. Not that we don't want to. It's just hard. It's the time. You're with your kids 24-7 and so I've always known that I've adored Sean and adored. Sean has been such a mentor to our daughter Vivi, like come to her gymnastics and like, she's amazing. But we never, I don't know that we would have had the opportunity to truly foster and deepen their friendship that we now have if it

wasn't for doing that show together. Yeah, I mean, that makes total sense. And did they always have the plan of doing couples? Like, were you in and you had to convince you or was it the other way around? Yeah. What? Well, actually, I got asked to do the first season and didn't work out because Jess was on tour, logistically just wouldn't make sense with all the kids. Yeah. Well, I wanted to get back on, and really it took the couple things to get back on. So it was some convincing to get her to go. But we found out, we actually got asked like 10 days before they shot the.

Was it really? Oh, God. So what did you do in those 10 days to prepare? Were you like, all right, let's see if we can sit in a cold plunge for 13 minutes go? Well, we said no. Oh, I said no. You did. I never had the intention of doing the show.

I've always been a fan of the show. Of course. After they asked Eric to do the show season one, we were curious. We were like, let's watch it. Let's like see how it all goes down. And we were hooked. It's become like a family show for all of us. Yeah.

But we would watch season after season because there's been three up until now being like, oh, daddy, how would you handle this? And the kids would be like, Dad, you could do that. You know, Mom, you could never do this show, you know. And so it was always about him. It was never about me ever even thinking about doing this. But whenever they called and they were like, listen, we want Eric to do it. We have a spot for him again, but it's going to be different this time. You have to go with him because we have another married couple on the show.

And we have to have that dynamic. If you guys say no, we'll ask another married couple because that's the spots we're filling right now. Oh my gosh. So I had a choice to make. And how did you make it? This feels like a thing. And until what? What made you say yes?

Who did I talk to? There was some long days going back and forth. Yeah. Your brother or your sister? Maybe it was even my stepdad is in the Air Force. Oh. I don't know. It was maybe just like a combination of things where you're like,

I think so. It was and Sean kept being like, you have to do it. Do not leave me hanging. And are you so glad you did it? I am so glad that I did it. It is an experience that you can never duplicate. Like, it's just so unique. Did you feel like empowered coming out of it

because your kids being like, mommy could never. And then you're like, watch me. Yeah. It's a lot of emotions when you come out of it. I bet. You know? I'm proud of us, for sure. But there's also the emotions of like, you're going to replay everything in your head.

Even if things worked out in the end and it was all positive, right? You still replay every little thing. And I've talked to the rest of the cast. Everyone does the same thing. You replay every single moment because it is just. so unlike anything you've ever done it's not like doing another show and you just pick up and move on like you just dissect every little thing

because it was just so out of the ordinary now I saw like Sean and Andrew like talking about how competitive they are and Sean wins and everything what was your dynamic the two of you on the show did you butt heads during it were you a team like what was the dynamic? Interesting because we got asked on a bunch

and they never really you know paired us against each other and really I don't think we're competitive I think they got a sense of that In such different industries in our careers, but also just like at home, we're not, like, super competitive in everyday life, I guess. It really came off as a supportive team, and, you know, how I saw Jess is how she's at home with kids, like, just very motherly, like, taking care of people. And so that basically was her role on the show was, like, taking care of other cast members, making sure they're fine physically or they're, you know, drinking water, they're getting rest. So definitely, it was fun to kind of watch that come to light. Yeah.

And you being an athlete, do you feel like that definitely, like, helped you? I think past experience definitely helps just the mentality of, like, the grind and the everyday thing. But the hard part was, like, in sports, most of time your days are scheduled, so you know kind of what's coming next, where this is you wake up and you have no idea what the day is going to entail. Then at night, you don't know when bedtime is because, you know, you can be laying in bed at 1130 and get a, you know, recruits. They bust up in there. You're up, you get a dress.

I would be like, sir, I'm sleeping. Yeah, no. Oh my gosh. I didn't sleep the whole season. Like, I literally didn't sleep. How long was filming, like four weeks, three weeks? It's 10 days. 10 days.

10 days of just a grind. Yeah, you're really not getting any downtime. No. And was it, because I remember Ali Fedatowski telling me like something about the, the toilet situation. Was it the same for you guys where it's just like not? A bucket? Yeah, like a bucket or like splintered seats.

It's plywood with a hole cut in the middle. And a bucket. And poop in a bucket. I can't even poop in an airport bathroom. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, that would be so hard. What was the hardest for you mentally and physically to get through?

These are the water, right? Yeah, the water was the hardest part for me because it truly was my greatest fear. And it's funny. I've done enough reality TV to know you don't tell them your greatest fear. Yeah, no, because they'll put you right in there. You don't tell them anything because they'll make a big thing out of it. Yeah. I was very, like, stoic the whole interview before, because they do pre-interviews before

you actually go do the thing. And so they're asking me, are you afraid of water? I'm like, nope. Yeah. Are you afraid of heights? Nope. Absolutely not. Are you afraid of dark places and being in tight quarters?

Nope. I just said no to everything because I know how it works. They're going to take the care. And so it's like, oh, Jesse's coming up. And your face, you know. And so, yeah, the water part, I really had to hold it together. I will never forget us walking up the mountain to get into the gator to drive us all the way up and walking across that bridge and me being like, oh my God.

I can't believe we're about to do this. I have like anxiety for you right now in this moment. I'm like, the moment of the plane crashing down into the water and then you're sitting there and it's rising and you're just feeling the water rise up and you have to have the perfect moment of oh and then you having to sit you can't even like close your nose you can't do anything because i don't know how to hold my breath without like closing my nose or putting my lip above my nostrils that's a really weird thing that i do yeah i go this oh yeah i've been doing it since i was a kid my siblings do it i don't know why we do that i really don't i saw a glimpse of it i was

like shit they're gonna show i look ridiculous we have to have your hands like this and you have to count to like 20 seconds oh and then after 20 seconds then you wait for the to tap you to then figure out how to get out of the right door that they want you to get out of. I mean, even if you did panic in that moment and you need like someone to come help you, you're still underwater. Yeah, they have someone in the back and they had to teach you before how to if you start to drown what to do. Okay, well, let me know because if I'm ever in the situation, what do you do? Well, they gave you this little tool that you have to learn to breathe. They have oxygen. So there's oxygen on the side of the seat. If you had a panic attack,

you grab it. Okay, that helps because that's like me on an airplane. As long as I have a annex beside me. I don't need to take it. I just need to know it's there. Yeah, no, it's there. No, that didn't help. It doesn't make you feel better at all. Okay, okay. Because for me, I don't even really, I couldn't remember how to use the thing. Well, the, the safety lesson was like a five minute scuba diver. Hey, let's just test it out a few times. So I mean, yeah, in that environment, it's fine. But once you get into like strapped down, oh yeah, you forget everything. It's a little totally. And let me tell you before, so they don't tell you, it's coming. You just have the like the day before the scuba training.

And I looked at the scoob guy. It was super sweet. And I go, what are we doing? Be honest. He's like, I can't tell you. And I'm like, am I going to need this emergency thing? Like, am I going to need it? He was like, I don't know.

And finally, I was like, listen, we don't need to keep this lesson going. Whatever we're doing, I'm going to just bail. This is my greatest fear. And I just need to know that I can bail if I'm scared. And he was like, you can bail if you're scared. I was like, okay, like, I'm not trapped. And I'm surprised I lasted and are there as long as I did. I wonder if your dreams will stop now because you've conquered your fear.

Yeah, that's interesting. I don't think I've had that, not in water. I've always had the plain dreams, but I feel like it was kind of like both. It was both. Yeah, I don't know. What was your hardest mental or physical part of it? Well, I'm claustrophobic, so I think tight and dark. Which happened a few times.

And we got a little bit of that. Yeah. Otherwise, I think it's just the, the, grueling days, truthfully, like the mental part of it where you have to be on. Yeah. Like you have this like high cortisol level like, okay, what's next, what's next, what's next? Yeah. It's like an anxiety rush.

Just because you have to be ready at all times. The unknown. The fear of the unknown. Yeah. You really do have it too. It's interesting how much our bodies can handle. The adrenaline was going 24-7. Yeah.

Like I think about those moments now where I'm like having to walk uphill to get to the kids football game. I'm like, oh. And I'm like, dude, we did that for hours upon hours and not once. And I go, oh, well, yeah, 50 pound backpacks. With 50 pound backpacks. Oh, my God. Why are you going to yell that?

That, yeah, the yelling part for me would also be traumatic because when people are mad at me or yell at me, I like shut down and cry. And I'm like, I feel like that would be my hardest thing. Really? Or birds. I hate birds so much. This episode of Off the Vine is brought to you by booking.com. Booking.

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How long have you two been together? Almost 15 years. amazing. I've told you this a million times. I always look up to your guys' relationship. Thank you. It's true. You guys just have a special little, I don't know what it is. It's light in love. And it comes across. Did you learn anything about each other that you didn't know before? For sure. Jess's grit and like her tenacity kind of really came out. I didn't know how she's going to do because she loves sleeping, loves the comforts of like her bed and her pillow and her things. There's a routine every night. Well, I was like, a little nervous because

run a cot in a tent on a bucket on dirt and so but just to see how tough and how gritty she was is like okay well it's kind of sexy what did you learn i got a little taste of why eric loved being a part of a team so much yeah oh good i never really did team sports growing up i was a cheerleader i did track but it wasn't like you're on the field together it's just a very different experience and there was a lot of team aspects, and I got to see Eric as a teammate instead of just my husband or the father of my children. I got to witness him as a teammate, and damn, he's a good teammate, a really good teammate. Like, I get why his teammates loved him, why he was so dependable.

You know, it was a different way of seeing up. I got to see him play football, like sitting in the stands, or I got to see him coming out of the tunnel or hear about it, but I never got to be with him. You were on the field with him. I was with him, and it was like, Wow, you are really great at this. Aw. You know?

That is nice. And that makes a lot of sense. I like that answer. Are the kids going to watch? Oh, yeah. Are they so excited? Oh, yeah. Because that must be so fun to watch it as a family and then be like, and now we're on it.

Yes. The kids were very, very excited. You know, Vivi definitely had the attitude of, don't you dare come home. You better go all the way. Really? You better make me proud. Very competitive. She's so competitive.

Little Eric cried. Oh, sweetie. Because he was worried about me. He was like, Mommy, you're not ready for this. You're going to get hurt. You're too small. You're not prepared. It was really sweet.

That's so sweet. Was that the longest? You guys travel a lot. So I guess that wasn't the longest that you've been away from them, but just different because you probably couldn't talk to them. Yeah, we don't really leave for long periods of time. I think the last time we were gone was when we went to Europe out on the boat. That was like a, even before.

that was probably like four years ago because i know even like firsthand trying to schedule stuff with you your kids always come first they definitely do i mean even when i did dancing the stars after the show i'm on a red eye back home like i just i don't i can't it feels very abnormal to be away from them for more than a couple days like we were supposed to be in l.a i think another day and a half and we got on a red eye on wednesday because we're just like we need to go home yeah no i was thinking that about you with dancing with the stars because i'm like that's that's one thing that shows special forces is a whole other thing but you got to practice in nashville and then take a red eye which i mean so exhausting but my point is that i love that your kids always come first yeah thank you

yeah they definitely do but do we say that what how you prepped for the 10 days before you went on there was no prepping no prepping no because we didn't really have time to prep the only thing we did was we had to tell them our physical ability so we had to run a mile we had to tell them how we what we ran it in and then we had to do like 15 laps in the pool just so they could it's your level of swimming. Crazy. Wait, and if you sucked, were they like, you can't come? It wasn't that.

It was just... That's a safety protocol to know, like, they had safety teams on site. Okay. Everything you did. Just you didn't see them because everyone's pretty comfortable with the task. And so if you weren't a good swimmer, they're a little closer in case they needed to come rest of me. Oh, that makes sense.

Yeah. I would need so much prep. There are people that had months in advance. Yeah, that's not fair. I mean, it is what it is. I mean, it's, I don't know. We just, it's the way it worked out. What did you guys have to pack?

Nothing. Underware. Underware. We only got three pairs of underwear. Skin care? I was very, very nervous about not being able to bring my chapstick. Chapsic. Yeah.

I cannot have dry lips. It's like a tick of mine. Oh, interesting. Yeah, they have to be moist. But your skin care, you don't care? No, we were allowed to bring, it was very, very limited, and they had to check everything to make sure. And you couldn't have more than three pairs of underwear.

You couldn't have more three pairs of like... Because you have to get in there and wash it yourselves. Yeah, they want you to wash. Did you at any point, like mentally break down? No. I don't think I cried. What? What are you a robot?

No, I just, I don't think I did. I think maybe I got weepy-eyed at one point where everyone was telling their stories. Like, that was emotional to hear everyone talk about their stories. Maybe I got weepy-eyed on what I got mad about something. She doesn't cry too often. Really? Yeah, I think I knew that about you, actually. He watched a dog's purpose on the plane out of the bathroom. He was hysterical. A dog's purpose? I watched that in the theater and had to remove myself.

He removed himself. He had to go. He was embarrassed. He had to go to the lavatory and cry and he came out. He was just a mess. I will never forget it. Was this on the way to Hawaii? Yeah. We were headed to our honeymoon in Hawaii and I still was learning because we got married after only two years and I'm still learning. about him and he on our way I was like wow he's a cryer he's so it was deep

it's dogs for loves I am right there with you did one of you ever want to give up and the other had to like

pull you through yeah yeah that was a thing every day I'd look at him and I'd be like I'd be like ready to go

every day it started to become an inside joke among the cast because they all knew it and Sean would be like stop I don't know

And I, other times we'd be like, you guys, we could all at the same time, everybody, just be like, let's get out of here. And that's it. They'd be like, and then we won't give you your paycheck. No, they give you paycheck no matter what. No matter what? I could be on the show for one minute. You still get paid. That's the deal.

That's the deal. See? Okay, I'll totally touch. Hey, special forces. If you're watching this, I would love to be a part of your show. They pay you no matter what. No, but you're right. I have that competitive in you or if I got there, I'd be like, oh, do this.

Yeah, first, and you do. I mean, you don't want to fail. And that's part of why I said yes, because saying no and turning it down already felt like I would be failing. And I don't like to fail. Yeah. I'm totally the same as you. The only time failing becomes okay for me is if a loved one is involved, meaning like my kids or a family member. Like if I'm unable, for example, like if I have to cancel a show.

Yeah. That would be failing to me. But I'm, but if it was for your family. a family member or something, it's like, it just, all of that goes out the window. And it's not about me internally anymore. It becomes about someone else. And I just, like, throw that out the window. That makes sense.

If you guys could handpick one couple to go through that with again, who'd you pick? Sean and Andrew. Okay, but that's, no. We already know that. They were great. They were so great to be with us. I was just awesome. I was going to pick a couple to go on that with our pick them.

Oh, yeah. They're amazing. But if you've already done it with them. Okay. You had to do it again, and you had to pick one more couple to do it with. Who would it be? And why me and Pino? Okay.

Who would I don't? Um. I'm going to say your sister. I was going to say my sister and Anthony too. I was thinking of that. My sister is a bad bitch. Let me tell you. You would never maybe suspect that.

Oh, I suspected at the moment I met her. Sydney's tough. Yeah. And she can go, if you think that I can go numb and like tune out any trauma, Sydney's next level. She's like, I disassociate for a living. She can disassociate and just get the job done. She is way even grittier.

Really? We talked about it. The only thing that I think she would struggle with, we talked about this, is she's not as physically strong as I am, but mentally, man. And then Anthony's a machine too. Is he?

He could just keep going and going. He would be able to turn it off and just go. Yeah. Have I met him? I don't know, but he's very, he's physically. like a grinder. He could just keep going and going and he could turn off the noise in his head for sure. I know I talk to you about this all the time and I've already mentioned it. I really do believe

a lot of people see your relationship as like such an inspirational. I know there's ups and downs and not like it's been like this the whole time. But like in the public eye, you know my fear around going into an relationship now with like just like sharing it. I find that so scary. And I don't want to ask what's the secret because I feel like that's such a typical question. But like what do you guys do to maintain such a strong relationship? I think what I find interesting, it's funny, they just asked us this on Us Weekly and I gave like a funny answer and then people are just like, I just like, I've answered this question so many times. I know and I, no, but I want to answer it on this level with you. You're like a girlfriend of mine. I, I've answered it so many times

I'm just like, he's hot. I don't know what y'all want me to say. You know what I mean? Like there's obviously there's so much deeper than that. It does help. It does. It does. Yeah, obviously being attracted helps. But that's obviously not why. Um, you know, I think that we keep a level of our relationship more private than you would assume. I think it looks like we are sharing, but we're really not. Yeah. I would never, I don't know. We just, we, there's things that are very sacred to me in a relationship and in a marriage that is just for you. And it's just for your relationship. I think that people in the public eye especially should be very careful because this is this is real life this is your your bubble

that you should keep safe this is for no one else yeah and so I think that we have a level a level of respect for our relationship that we that we just share with we don't need to share everything with the world and you've kind of already been there done that because you had a reality show yes so you're like we've done it now we keep what we want sacred and we have kids now so it's it kind of it just ups that a little bit more of keeping the respect for their privacy too. I'm very careful about what I say and what I do the best of my ability because I have a mouth on me. But I do my very best, when you have kids, they're going to have the internet and they're going to see things. And I have too much respect for my children to not be the best version of myself, you know? Yeah. I think my

perspective would change too because I also have a mouth on me. I totally, I have the biggest mouth. And it is like, I was a working deal every day to keep it locked in. You know, like, don't let her out. Don't let her out. Yeah, you get the spicy version of. I think, you know, to add on that, like, to her point, and maybe on the other side of the spectrum, but just the ying and yang, like, we really balance each other out. I think what ultimately, you know, worked is that we have similar values. We see life the same. You know, we wanted to raise a family. We have a good community. yeah um and we just spend a lot we want to spend time together yeah so like you said he's my best friend he's my best friend in the whole world we are there for each other through thick and thin that's

you know the bottom line just the connection that we share with our kids and our careers and just our home life it's all very very important and we get to share a little bit of it but a lot of it too that we just enjoy for ourselves yeah you know we have a good support system good group of friends that we get to spend time with and share our life with and that's you know been super important yeah he's just he's my best friend and I just think even from the very beginning even before kids before anything we just got along so well we understood each other we had I always say I think it's so important to have the same view on religion politics and money yeah and the way you want to raise your children I'm going to throw a four in there yeah if you can align on those

four things you're already off to like a great start and we just aligned on all four those things right from the get-go. And I think that it's such a great foundation. It just sets the foundation off and the right place. You're going to go through life together. You're going to go through hard things. And if you don't align on, align on most of those things. Yeah. The foundation's got to be there. It's got to be there, of course. And then obviously, like, we're being silly. Like, we are attracted to each other. You're both so hot. It's stupid. But so we want to keep making babies. But also, he's just, he's such a good person. He's an amazing person. And, And, like, I look up to the way that he goes about life.

Like, I just, he's just a wonderful person. And I think that we bring something, I bring, like, the fire. And I always say he's the mighty oak. Yeah. That holds down the root of our family. And I'll fill it with the leaves and the colors. Like, that's just how we are together. Oh, my God.

That is so sweet. But that's how, that's our relationship. That's our marriage. It's so, I feel like people do. You find, If you find that person, you're so lucky, but not everybody's going to find that. But when you do, it's like, it's just like, you feel it. Have you ever met someone with better intuition and, like, psychic abilities?

No. Because also I feel like that's how you know, like, you would know in two seconds if he wasn't a good person, if he wasn't going to, like, raise children the same way. Like, she would just know. My light just blinked behind. Yeah. That's my sign when something's like aligning lights blink for a minute. Oh, wow.

Yeah, but it's... That's true, though. Right? What's kind of scary is, like, I never believed in astrology or just like, you know, I was kind of simple-minded, I guess, in the sense we first met. And she would just keep prove me wrong on everything. I'm like, oh, my God, I know it's intuitiveness, but also it's just like six cents that, you know, some people just have.

Yeah. It's freaky, but it's pretty sharp. I mean, she told me about her dreams about, like, you before a game or something, and then it would happen. And like... I didn't like that. Yeah. But even like you happen to do. But I would never tell him before because I didn't want to put that in his head or into the universe.

I would keep it to myself. Yeah. But I would write it down because he didn't believe me back in the day. But I had a dream. It was like I used to sleep until noon because I was a musician on the road. That's just what we did. And he would be up and he'd go to football practice. And I woke up at like 9 a.m.

And I had a dream that he had hurt his left leg and he wasn't going to be able to play. So specific to the game. Left leg. Left leg. it wasn't going to be able to play in that game and I wrote it down like Eric needs to be careful with his left leg like okay I wrote it down I went back to sleep and then I woke up and I had a call from him and he was like I hurt my left leg I'm not going to be able to play this weekend I mean and I was like I knew it I knew it the dream told me but you I don't want to I don't want to warn people

because I feel like it also I don't want to put out bad juju in the energy in the universe but even like your dream about the plane and the water and then you like are on special forces doing that like i feel like that was already oh there you're talking my friend hallie i the day that the plane went into the hudson i had dreamt of of my friend being in a plane crash into the water she actually wasn't going from new york to charlotte she's going from charlotte to new york but i had a dream and i woke up calling her 17 times or i was panicked because i was afraid of this happening and whenever i she answered the phone she goes i'm okay i wasn't on that plane i was like what do you mean? Oh my gosh. And I didn't even know that that it happened. But like I definitely

have had a lot of weird stuff like that happened. And I just, it's, it's a superpower. It's not even that. It's just, it's a weird. It's weird for sure. I don't find it weird. But you said something earlier about babies. And I know you guys have gone back and forth on wanting more. Where are we at? Well, he snipped. You're sniffed. Oh, I knew that. Oh. Oh. I thought you just said recently in like another interview or something that you guys were still on the fence. Maybe I said something like we're usually that like 2% Oh yes That things slip through

Oh like I'm always medically the 2% Like if they say only one and 100,000 this can happen to I'm always that person And so I'm like I will be that girl that just like You know and I've had dreams of having a fifth And so I'm always like, oh no I mean not oh no that's amazing I dreamt of Denver I knew Denver I dreamt what he looked like I knew his name everything it's like

So I take those things seriously I've had dreams about it and so I'm always like yeah I think we're at our capacity we are at our capacity we were before but like you know it happens hey you just take the mentality of special forces you just do it you just do it it is a blessing they're the best oh my gosh I can't date nights what do date nights look like for the deckers yeah what do they look like Eric she's been on me about scheduling some date nights because it's been a while it's been a minute oh I can't imagine how hard it is Well, when we travel, like, we don't want to be away from the kids more than we have to. So it's like we're not going to come back after being gone a week and have a date night.

There's an adult birthday party here or there. Yeah, we have like three birthday dinners. So it's like, it's kind of, we kind of utilize those. Yeah. But our date nights, you know, and it's been, I guess just a winter because I'm not a big bath. We love taking bowl of bass when it's cold out. You need to take more baths. I just don't like, I don't like baths when it's warm and it's hot.

It's uncomfortable. But baths are one thing. Hot tub nights are fun. Hot tub nights are great. I'll do a hot tub. We do naked hot tub nights. Yeah, yeah. We get out and get excited.

The kids are sleeping. The sun, you know, I mean, that's that. The stars are twinkling and we get out there and we like get in the hot tub and naked hot tubs. Make a hot tub on Netflix and chill. It's kind of our date night. Netflix and chill? Yeah, that's great. That's, I mean, whenever people ask like what my ideal date night would be and they expect something extravagant, I'm always like at home, in sweats.

A naked hot tub sounds. Yeah, it's fantastic. Yeah. And then just like, oh my gosh, curling in bed and having. movie, I don't know, with a glass of wine. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Thank you for your time, sir. Thank you, honey.

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See, this is what people say. People tell me all the time, why haven't you done it? You seem like you'd be like fun. Like this would be fun for you. Yeah. Okay, well, I've done a lot of auditions and they've just never worked out. And I think that I have not had the right character. I think that's the problem.

They've always been like serious or like sexy and like I do not know how to play that. Yeah. I think that humor would be way more up my alley. And so I, Jana called me, Kramer. She was like, I'm doing this movie, this Karen Kingsbury film. It's like not a homework movie. It's not live. Like, it's going to be in theaters.

Like, it's, oh, yeah. And she was like, there's a part where you could play my best friend. And I feel like you'd be great at this. If you, before you auditioned, let me come over and help you. Yeah. So she came over red lines. She helped put me on tape and sent it in. And then my agent got a call and they were like, I think that she's going to be perfect for this.

the, you know, the director just wants to talk to her. So I spoke to the director and then after that, a week later, they're like, you've got the part. That's so cool. And I was like, no way. Congratulations. Thank you. I was so excited. And it was my first movie and I loved every second of it.

It's called the Christmas ring. It's called the Christmas ring. And what is it about? It is about this widow who has this ring that was lost. It was like a family ring that was lost 10 feet down in the Colorado snow. And she is desperate to find it. She's got an older daughter and she ends up meeting this man who she falls mad and love with who actually plays a part in this.

I don't want to give too much away. But it's really a beautiful story. Wow. When does it come out? And it's like a nod to our military. Like it's November 7th. It'll be in theaters. So you've already filmed everything.

Yeah. Everything's done. Wow. And what was filming? Like, was it everything you thought it would be? Did you enjoy the process? The only thing that was different was how many times. takes you have to take. It's not because you're not doing it. It's because they have to get every

single angle. So it's not like the movies where it's not what you assume. Like you assume in a movie you've got a camera here, camera camera. It's not like that. Yeah. They, you have to do it like 20 times. So they can get every single angle of the room just for one scene. So one scene where it could be like six lines. You could be there for three hours. Oh. So how long did it take you to film this whole thing? I mean, we had like 12 hour days. Whoa. Yeah. It's no joke. Acting. and a lot of waiting around. Yeah. A lot of waiting around.

It could not have gone better. I was with a girlfriend. I was with like Karen is the most incredible person, the writer. Like it was just so special to be a part of. So that's so nice because obviously Jana could help you with because she's done this before. And you guys. She was so helpful. Yeah.

And just like so professional. Yeah. Like I've never seen her in that light. Yeah. She was so professional, knew her craft. Yeah. It's really good actress. Yeah.

to see your friends like in their element when you haven't like you can watch you know like I can watch my girlfriend do what she does or something but like when you're in it with them doing it every day and you see how hard it is yourself and then you're like oh you do this all the time yeah yeah I mean she was just on it it was really impressive to see did it make you want to do more acting for sure yeah more more comedic acting yeah like I would love to do more comedy it was definitely more natural for me I didn't feel like it was having to be something I wasn't like it was just natural and I could be silly that's cool because you also like you know what it's like to be on stage yeah and that's like a performance aspect of it but acting like I'm sure that

helped you in the acting world for sure and having a very clear specific character I need direction it's almost like when I go into my publishing company and I have to write a jingle for a commercial if you're giving me very specific tasks I can do it yeah if you're just throwing me in there like for an audition. This was great because Jana gave me a very clear specific task. You're going to be this kind of person. This is how they want it to be. I work better that way. Yeah. I don't just throw me into the ring. I like direction. I want direction. And if you give me, I take direction very well, I will say. And so the fact that they're like, she's super preppy. She's going to wear collared shirt. She's going to wear glasses. Think Draper James, Reese Witherspoon, think, you know,

Chessie from the parent trap. Like I knew what I would my like what the direction was. Yeah. I knew the assignment. And so I feel like that helped me. That's cool. I honestly just kind of thought about my mother. Did you? Yes. My mother, I was totally like, I will be Karen today.

Yeah. That's amazing. And you have a new duet with Joss Stone? How did that collab happen? I met Joss on a plane coming back from Dancing the Stars a couple years ago. She had just done guest judge on American Idol. Yeah. And she sat behind me and I just like popped around.

I was like, hey. I was like, you're Jost. And I love you and I love your music. and I've always been a fan and, you know, welcome to Nashville. She just moved to Nashville. Oh, cool. She was so sweet. She had her baby with her new baby, and we exchanged numbers and stayed in touch.

She's in Aries, too. She's just, like, she's just really fiery and just like, she's just cool. Yeah. She's just a cool person. And I sent her the song because I was pitched the song. It really sounded like a perfect blend of soul in country. And she was like, I'm in. Cool.

So she recorded it and we put it out. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah. Your voice is so good. Oh, thanks, girl. Also, you wrote a Christmas song? Yeah. That would be my dream to write a Christmas song.

I love Christmas music. I'm always doing Christmas music. I have a Christmas song. This is when I did not write, but I have a Christmas song coming out with Jamie Johnson who's like, you know, one of my favorite people in the world. That was, yeah, anything Christmas related I'm in, I'm in. Yeah.

And you've had over 250 million streams and got to sing with Dolly Parton on going to be you. I mean. That is like a put it on your tombstone pinch me moment. You know, let me just say, I did that and I was just like kind of retired. after this. Yes. Ended on a high note.

That's crazy. No, she's amazing. I love Dolly. Well, you guys, you really had a bond with her with your whole family, didn't you? We did. After we did that song,

she invited me to come interview her for her children's book and had us come out and hang out and she's wonderful. Isn't she just like a. Godmother. You would assume. And then some.

And better. Yeah. I've never met her. I know so many people in my life like Carly Pierce and you and people who have. She's everything and more. Yeah. Such a good person.

Well, she's just one of those people also where like, I feel like if she ever even entered a room, you like gasp. Oh, yeah. She's a vision. She absolutely. And she's iconic, obviously, all the things. She's a little polypocket. She is. She really is.

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Now, I just grabbed a super soft throw blanket and a little cute lamp for the podcast studio. what that does to a room is incredible the blanket is basically the softest thing ever and then the lamp just makes the whole space come together and feel warm and cozy while we record and shipping is always so fast and it's free and honestly it makes me that much more excited to be in the studio now and the best part about wayfair is that they've got something for every style and every budget so you don't have to shop in 10 different places you know furniture decor appliances cookware it's literally all in one spot so cosify your space with wayfair's curated collection of easy affordable fall updates from comfy recliners to cozy bedding and autumn decor find it all for way less at wayfair.com that's w a y f a ir.com wayfair every style every home i mean you literally are a woman that does it all like it is crazy how much you do while also being so family oriented and it's just amazing to watch and see you so then I'm like, I mean, I know you said like, I'm done here, but what is next? What would you like

to do next? Just continue doing more acting. Like, what is it on your bucket list that you'd want to do next? I feel like I have been a little lost in the music world for myself. I feel like it has been such a soul-searching time period. You know, I was touring and making music. It was my last record deal with Warner. I had should have known better came out. I was doing um cane brown's tour like i was just the busy the bus the busiest i'd ever been and i kind of got burnt out that year and i had just i didn't dancey with the stars that year i was just overworking myself and i kind of just crashed i was so tired yeah and i told myself i was

going to take a break yeah and months later i get pregnant with denver which was like the biggest blessing yeah so it really forced me to slow down and just kind of sit back and go like Like, what do I want to do? I love working. Not a lot of people realize I got into this business because I got a record deal at 19. I've been seeing and doing all of this since I was 15. I started coming to Nashville 15. Like, this was my life.

Yeah. A lot of people just thought I did like the show with Eric and that's like, I decided to just be a singer after that. Like, and that honestly just kills me sometimes. Oh, I bet. You're like, um, I did the grind actually. I did this before. Yeah.

Like this was what I was doing before. Um, it was always my dream to be a country singer. Yeah. And so, um, you know, it's. It's interesting because my career has taken off in so many different ways. And I think that the show and some of these other things kind of outshined it a little bit and the cookbooks and stuff. But like music is my heart. And like I said, backtracking, I was overworked and overgrinding and I took a beat, got pregnant with Denver.

And then I've been at this place now of like, what do I want to do? I think I've had this challenge of like, I want to put out music that I really love that speaks to me. but I also get torn thinking I need to put out music that I'm supposed to put out. I know, that must be so hard. It is hard, and I think I'm finally coming to a place of I'm going to just write what I want to write, which is about my life. And I thought that people didn't want that. I used to think, like, people are tired of hearing me sing about songs about Eric or my family

or, like, they don't want to hear these things. Maybe they want to hear things about heartbreak or they're just not going to connect to that. Yeah. I think I've been so open with my life. life, I have to make music that is like so aligned and accurate with who I am and stop being afraid and steering away from that. Yeah, because you're also at a place in life and you've done so much that you don't have to write for other people anymore. Like you don't have to. And I feel like as soon as you get to that place where you know like this is what feels good to me, people are going to

listen. Yeah. And I think I'm getting there. I'm getting to the place where I'm finally ready to start writing and being happy and comfortable writing about. I don't care if you if you like that I'm writing about my love life or my family. Like this is just how it is. This is real. I used to be worried it wasn't cool enough. It wasn't sexy enough. It wasn't this or that. But it's like that's my life and that's what I'm going to write. And I would love to go out on the road again and tour again. But, you know, I've got four kids. I'll never be able to probably tour the way that I used to. Yeah. I mean, you've lived like a hundred different lives in this one life. I just, I I've got to be there for my kids.

Yeah. Oh, my gosh, which I'm sure is your favorite job. Oh, it's the number one job. It's what keeps me going. Yeah. It makes me the happiest. It fills me more than anything. What's something you think people misunderstand about you?

You tell me. Oh, I don't know. I would love for you to tell me. I have no idea. Come on. No, I'm sure there's something. I really mean it because I remember, like, I remember you going through a phase or something where people were just so nasty.

And, but I just feel like I see all positive. You know when people like, if I'm in the situation, you'd probably be like, what? People said that about you? Like, I don't know. So to me, I'm like, I always like to ask people if like, and maybe it's nothing. Maybe you're like, I don't care and maybe people do misunderstand me or maybe they don't. Gosh, I don't know. I think that I was on reality TV for so long ago.

I think that I just kind of grew up, you know, and I think I there was a period where I just became so guarded. I think we talked about this, where I just, it was like a wake up call to just protect my bubble more than ever. And I feel like I have done that. And I think that's why I say it, because I'm like, I feel like you've really gotten into a place of protecting your piece and like it shows. Yes. Yes. Yeah. I definitely do. And like I like to have fun. I like to put things out on social media because it's fun. It's fun to do and I like to be silly. But I will say I'm like the happiest I have ever been in my life. Truly the happiest I have ever been because I'm out of place where my family,

my kids are number one. And anything else is fun to do. I just want to spread goodness. I just want to be good to people. I want to have good people in my life. And if it's not serving me, I'm getting rid of it. I don't care anymore. And that's the podcast.

That's it. That is the last word we're going to say. That was so good. Yeah. Because I'm like love ending on a high note. Thank you so much for coming here. And I feel like you're superwoman. Oh, my gosh.

When did Special Forces Air? September 25th, I believe. Oh, coming up. Okay. September 25th on Fox, right? Yes. Okay, everybody tune in and keep an eye out for your acting debut. Ooh.

I can't wait to see it. I'm going to the theater. Come! Come to the premiere party. Okay. Yeah. Oh, I would love to. Please do.

Okay. Where's something festive? I have something so festive in my closet that I've been dying to wear. So now I have somewhere to wear it to. Yeah. There's a big movie, Red Carper Premier. so you've got to come. I'm so proud of you.

Thank you. Yeah, this is so cool. You just do so many cool things and you're a good person and I just love you. This September, CBS hits are streaming free on Pluto TV. I'm coming in hot.

For this month only, you can watch full seasons of the CBS shows you love. From the courtroom drama of Madlock to the heroics of fire country. Go back to where it all began in NCIS origins or watch the hilarious hauntings of ghosts all for free full seasons of the CBS shows you love this month only on Pluto tv stream now pay never i'm justin semester and i'm blakely thornton

join us for yestergays the podcast where we break down the most pivotal pop culture moments in history and give them the queer love that they deserve the things that got us riled up during dial-up those makeouts that Should have been breakouts. And the drops that were cemented in pop. I'm talking Benefer. Tyra versus Naomi. Tom Cruise jumping on that couch. And so much more.

So please rate us, subscribe to us on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or anywhere you get audio-related content. We also take Memo and Cash App. A-C-H? Or credit card number as well. We're malleable. Yeah, we're gay today.