Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Grape Therapy: All Things Bachelor & Barstool with Kelly Keegs

Episode Date: March 23, 2023

In this dramatic therapy sesh, Kaitlyn is coming to you from Germany where it’s mandatory to poop on a shelf, and Kelly is coming to you from her home wearing a very on-theme sweatshirt that we’re going to need the link to. The two are chatting about all the drama this week from The Bachelor fantasy suites – AKA (no) sex (of any kind) week – to Barstool where Kelly recently made the “biggest callout” in Barstool history. They’re here to break down what happened on our screens, on the internet, and even what happened offline, like Kaitlyn drunk texting Kelly and sober texting Rachel for some behind-the-scenes scoop. Kaitlyn’s also sharing her insider knowledge of why Zach said he wasn’t going to have sex, then had sex, and then told Kaity on camera, because apparently there are reasons for doing these things (and often those reasons are called “producers”). Plus, they share who they would both go to Paradise for and why they can absolutely relate to the word “crusty.” Thank you to our sponsors! Check out these deals for the Vinos: PELOTON - Explore Peloton Row and their financing options at onepeloton.com/row.  THUMA - Go to Thuma.co/VINE to receive a $25 credit towards your purchase of The Bed plus free shipping in the continental U.S. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Caitlin and friends are here to share unfiltered advice, lots of laughs, and some major breakthroughs. So put your feet up, pop a cork, and get ready for some grape therapy. This episode of Great Therapy is brought to you by Thuma. Go to Thuma.com slash Vine to receive a $25 credit towards your purchase of the bed plus free shipping in the continental U.S. And Peloton. Peloton workouts are made to work for you, and the Peloton Rower is made for you whether you're a pro already or you're just getting started.

You can try Peloton Rrow risk-free with a 30-day home trial, new members only not available in remote locations, see additional terms at OnePeloton.com slash home dash trial. Welcome to this episode of Grape Therapy. I almost forgot which show I was on. Welcome to Grape Therapy. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. Your session is now starting.

And you know what? Drama, okay, Bachelor drama, Barstool Drama. We're going to talk all about it today. And thankfully, I've got Miss Kelly Kiggs herself. with me here today to break it all down. You probably know her from Barstool as the co-host of Cutting Stems, which I joined her for a couple weeks back. And we are going to get into the recent Barstool drama, too.

Of course, we get deep into Bachelor Sex Week, LOL at Zach calling it that. I like to call it Deep Dickin, whatever, from his choice to announce that he wasn't having sex to then having sex to then telling people he had sex. There's just a lot to unpack here. It's such a great combo with Kelly. Always love chatting with her. We had a lot of fun, and I hope you guys enjoy today's Bachelor Recap Therapy Sesh with Kelly. So I'm in Germany right now.

I was going to say, what are you doing over there? Having fun? You know, just eating some schnitzel. Drink it a couple beers. I was in London and then Paris, and I've been eating like a queen, but like shit at the same time. Just pasta every night, pizza, bread, like everything. And I've been, my body's been fine. And then today, I'm like, you know what?

For lunch, I'm going to mix in a salad, had some greens, had some fruit. And what do you know what? I basically blow up my bathroom when I get home. I'm like, what? That's honestly always what happens. I will have the same issue constantly. I'll say the same thing myself. Like, wow, Kelly, you've really been eating like shit lately.

You've got to mix in something green at least. And I swear to God, I feel like shit for the next two days after it. I don't understand what that is. I don't understand. My body's like rejecting greens. but I like, so I don't, have you ever been to Germany? No, but I'm, I would like to go. Is it fun?

I freaking love it. It's so, I mean, I haven't been here in 10 years and I just, I love it. And I can speak like a tiny, tiny little bit just because I lived here for six months. And so I like, it's fun being able to like say certain things and like kind of understand certain things. But it's so weird because so that's, that is the bathroom, the toilet. And then this is the shower and like bathroom. and they always have a separate room for the toilet. And it goes back to like, so back in the day, they have poop shelves on the toilet.

So it's where when you go to the bathroom, it like lands on a shelf before it goes in the toilet so that you can inspect it to see if you're sick. What? I hate that. I would hate it. Really hate that so much. And I would have to like take apart the toilet and take it off. Like there's no way.

That is. I know. And that makes the experience even worse, to be honest. That makes everything worse. And then I didn't wash my hands. So how do you feel about that? Now I'm repulsed and I'm hanging up. And that's what's happening.

Now you're disgusting and I'm hanging up. Sorry. Okay. But I know we're going to talk about Bachelor and that's dramatic enough. But you've got a little drama going on over there in your world, Ms. Kelly. What is going on over there? You know, sometimes I'll let feelings or things. like build up for too long

and then I cause some trouble and I don't mean to cost as much trouble as I do but sometimes you gotta cause some trouble yeah I'm in a little bit of drama at work I yesterday wrote a blog about two of these girls that I work with who I like who are great as people

I don't want to get misconstrued like I'm talking shit about these girls constantly the thing I'm talking shit about is they have a podcast which is good you should listen to it Mean Girl Pod like you know they're great they put out these social clips and you know the social team is to blame as well where they just sound like complete fucking idiots and i keep seeing it and it's been like it's it's gotten worse in

the past like couple of months like it wasn't always like this they started out like great they were getting good um you know good interaction like all this great stuff whatever and then they've pivoted to this like dumb girl vibe and i just i can't deal with it anymore and i there's only so few women who work at barstool and we try really hard not to like sound like fucking idiot it's all the time and they just are and so I just I decided to call them out I said you know what this is ridiculous because I know that they can handle something like that they can handle like the brutal honesty they can handle right criticism and it's fine in the same way that I can that we're all very similar at work and and people you know people agree with me and that's great I haven't

heard from them at all so I have to go into the office after this no and I thought for sure we'd like I mean not like laugh about it but I thought they'd be like hey what the fuck you're such a bitch And I'd be like, I know, but aren't I speaking the truth? Like, we'd have a combo like that. And maybe we still will. But it's now been like a full 24 hours and I've heard nothing from them. And they, I know they're in the office. So when I get there, we'll see how it goes.

But, you know, there might be some sour grays. That, well, I'm so curious because I feel like that's what people love about you is that you, like, you do call things how they are and how you see them. And you want what's best for everybody. And that might come across to some people is like, they might be like, oh, you're a bitch. You'd be like, I know. then let's like talk about it. So maybe they're waiting until you get to the office.

Imagine there's just like a camera crew set up for when you get there to see how this all goes down. That's usually how it is. Like I walked in yesterday because I had said on Twitter, I was like, I'm going to like, I'm going to write a blog about it because people were talking shit about this one clip that came out about them like not washing their hands. It was just like a, it's an overused, I don't know, whatever. I was talking shit about the clip. And when I got into the office, everybody was up my ass being like, oh, is the blog written? Is it what's happening?

Bub, blah, plus. Camera's the whole thing. we always do this. That's how it works. It's a reality show, you know, at its core, basically. And that's just kind of how it goes. But I guess today, no one's bringing that same energy for them. So I don't know what happened. Like, I don't know if they, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what's going on. So it'll be interesting when I get there. I'm sure people will be in my face about it. But again, like, maybe I have to sometimes think about how blunt I'm being. Because I'm not trying to like hurt feelings, but I am trying to make a point. And I am trying to like send a message and whatever. And I know sometimes people don't don't like it but i i'm sick of i'm sick of caring about that i'm sick of caring about people not liking honesty or bluntness and saying that it's cruelty and whatever it's like no i'm not being cruel i'm just being real with these people that i know can handle a real discussion or or so i hope absolutely and that's part of your job too you're writing blogs it's your blog it's your opinion and you're doing it in a way where it that's literally why people follow you is for your

honesty and for your like unapologetic you know thoughts and and you weren't trashy them being like, these losers don't deserve a podcast. No, that would be, you know. Keep the pod. Let's just make the clips better. Like, that's it. Like, why? It's tough because it is a larger discussion outside of them.

And it has to do a little bit with, I would say, the social team at work. But it really has to do with like the internet as a whole that the only time the needle is moved and the only way for anyone to grow and succeed is if we bait them with outrage. And I'm just sick of that. Like how I won't do that. I will not make myself look stupid or say outlandish things just for clicks. Like I can't wrap my head around that and I've never been good at that. And maybe that's not why I'm like not quite as successful as some other people. And to me, that's fine.

I'd rather like have 100 people watch my show than 10,000 people who think I'm an idiot on the outside. Like I just, I won't do it. And it's, you know, I just wish that like the internet was a different place sometimes, you know. And that wasn't what got people talking. I know, and sometimes I have to think about that as well because sometimes I know clickbait can do really well for certain things. Sometimes I know, like, I don't know. I see other people in Bachelornation or other places do these things and then or even ask people uncomfortable questions. And I'm like, ah, like, I'm always like, I don't know if I can do that.

Like, I don't know if it was, it's like worth the extra clicks for who I am as a human being or like how I believe in it. But I try and play the game sometimes, but sometimes it feels really icky. For sure. Right. And you have to play the game sometimes. But my favorite way of playing the game is making the clickbait like clever. Like I think that it's it's funny when you get got and like you like I'll put something on my story. Like yesterday we did cutting stems last night. And Ria had received a like a spoiler in her DMs. And she was talking about how, oh, I wish I could tell you guys. But we're not spoiler people, myself, Fran and Trent. And so we were like, don't you dare. And then after the show was over in the group chat we have, Rio was like, you guys, I really wish I could tell you. Like. I'll tell you is it's a big moment. Like she kept like hinting like she was about to say it. And Trent left the group chat, like to be dramatic. And so we all we posted it online being like Trent left the group chat. Like it's a big deal.

And I posted on my story being like, see why Trent left the group chat. And it's a link to cutting sense. Like that kind of course that's clickbait, but it's clever. It has to do with the content, whatever. It's not just like saying shit to start a conversation where all you're getting is hate. And it's just how do you, I don't know how you live like that. I don't know how you live with, like, people shitting all over you all the time. Unless the results are great.

And, you know, I just though, I don't know if they're, if it's worth it. Yeah. And that's, and I mean, that's all you were saying. And that's all you were. But it was just so funny how, you know, like big cat and KFC and Dave, they were all like, oh, it's the biggest most blunt call out in Barstool history. Like, they're making it such a thing. I know. I'm like, is it?

I feel like people have been way more rude. I mean. It's like, I follow Barstle for a long time before I even started working there. And everybody was like way meaner. back in the day. So I don't know what people are talking about. But if they want to give me that title, I'll take it. If I were to close my eyes and listen to you, do you ever get told that you sound like Miley Cyrus? Oh my God, no, but what a compliment. No, no one's ever said that. Maybe it's just, I got the deep voice. People sometimes, they'll say, some people say, like,

they say I'm a stone, I think, because we always have had similar face shape and hair and deep voices. But no, not Miley. I'm loving that, though. Yeah, I love Miley's grassy. That's going to keep me sexy voice. Yeah. Same. I was thinking about it while you were talking. I was like, if I close my eyes, I feel like I would think I was talking to Miley. Okay. So what now? I love that. Now where do we go from here? Like are the, is someone on their social like clips team? Are we all going to have a conversation and or what do you think will happen? Or are you just like, who fucking knows? We'll find out when I get to the office. Definitely like we'll find out when I get to the office. But I know that they're not going to do anything about the clips. They're going to keep doing what's

working for them. And Dave said that last night on. the rundown if you follow barcel you know the the rundown is every night and mondays it's uh dave fortnoy and kFC and big cat and they discussed it a little bit and dave said that as far as he knows they're getting results and they're getting clicks and so don't change anything they're doing he he likes my you know my passion about it but he doesn't he doesn't really carry the way as long as results are there and that's great and that's how he should be thinking and of course he's not going to discourage people who are doing what they feel like they need to do to you know do well for themselves. I, if I don't talk to that, I mean, I have to talk to them in person, like,

it's ridiculous, whatever. But if they don't interact with this at all online, I just have a feeling it's going to go away. And, you know, next Monday, we're going to get another ridiculous clip that's going to piss me off. And we continue on this never-ending cycle of bullshit, Caitlin. I wish I could just, like, be a little fly on the wall at the office today and see what that. Well, you can just text me and tell me how it goes. Oh, yeah, I'll just let you know. I'll let you know. But I am, I am anxious. I wasn't anxious because I thought like, oh yeah, it's fine. These girls are good. They can take it. Whatever. I'm not worried. And not hearing from them has made me a little worried that I might have to dole out a couple of apologies or not

really an apology, but like a, I'm okay. Like, sorry, not sorry. Maybe I was mean. Like, I don't know. I just don't feel like I was. So. No, I don't think you were. I don't think you were either. I really don't think you are. I love how the other night, too, I'm just remembering this now. I sent you a text at like whatever time, London time, and I was like, Kelly, I am drunk and had an edible and I need to know about your bioluminescent bath because do you know what I did? I went online. I was influenced by your tweet one night. You had a bioluminescent bath and it looked like I was going to say, how did you even know? How did you know about that? Because I couldn't remember if we talked about it because we had just did cutting sentence. I was like, did I bring that up again? I never shut the hell up about that bath. No, it was on Twitter and I was like immediately influenced. And it looked like you were bathing in the stars. And I was like, I want to do that. Mm-hmm.

All right, you have heard me say it before. And now I'm, well, you know what? I'm going to say it again. It's embarrassing to keep telling you this. But I cannot put furniture together. You're like, I get it, Caitlin. You can't put furniture together. I can do a lot of things, but I can't put furniture together.

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build your own bath bomb. I paid like $119 for this thing because I was, that's how influenced I was. And I'm like, I'm waiting for it. And I get this little, I don't know, glass ball that's filled with liquid. And it says like immediately take out and feed because this is live. And I was like, what? And so I take it out and it has to be in sunlight. And there's like little alive, I don't know, octopus specs. And I have to feed it every week. And I'll like, so at one point do I put this in the bath? And then I realized, like, I definitely ordered the wrong thing. And it was not for the bath. You ordered like a, you ordered like a, like a bioluminescence terrarium or something in town? Like you're just growing organisms in your house now. Yes. I'm just

growing these organisms. And then when I swirl it at night, it turns bright blue and it's so cool. But I'm like, yeah, I don't think I should like bathe in that. Probably not. Yeah, no, that's not it. No, the, the thing that I found, I don't even know how I found it. Again, I was like, I always find these things when I'm high late at night and I'm like trolling the internet and I'm like on Amazon and I'm always like, I wake up in the morning like two or three days later and I have all these packages. I'm like, what the fuck am I buying? I bought a genie lamp.

Like, it's weird. I buy a lot of weird shit, but I found the shit too. It's bizarre. But I still like it when it shows up. So I guess I know what I like. But I, with the bath, it's called a bath diamond. And the thing though with it is like, they, They charge you like $100 something dollars for it.

You get this big, uh, like bath bomb. And then you get this little thing of these like, they're like bath salts or something. They're not salts, but they're, they're crystals, bath crystals. Yes. And those are all you need. Like you don't need the big thing. So I had bought the whole thing because I thought you needed the bomb to like make the stuff work. And so whatever turns out you just need these little things.

So whatever package is like cheapest with that those little crystals in it, it will work just the same. Okay. But I got them. and I had seen pictures and I was like, holy shit, this is going to light up. I was going to do like a photo shoot. It was like, this is going to light up my whole bathroom. This is crazy. And when all the lights were off and you could see it with your eyes, it looks unbelievable.

If you try to take photos of it, it's very difficult. And if the light is even like leaking in from the other room, you can't see it. So it's very finicky. But when you're in pitch black and it's in the tub, it's very cool. Well, you send me your link. I'll send you mine and we'll go from there. Perfect. Also, let's get into the reason that we're all here.

and that is the fantasy sweets in Thailand always no matter where you are a beautiful place to fall in love get engaged and what does that say no sex it says no sex it's crossed out I wore this today this is a sweatshirt that I have that I got ironically it's like a look at the back it's like a it says premarital sex kills it's like some kind of collab with it's a collaboration with like a rose in good faith a cool brand and they're They did, like, a collaboration with, I think, like, the Brigham Young Virginity Club, like, in a real way. Like, this is, like, virginity's cool, you know? And I obviously bought this ironically. So, but I love it. It's like one of my favorite sweatshirts. I mean, and it's really cute.

It's also really cute. It's fun, right? And works perfectly for today. This whole thing, I'm so perplexed and I'm so excited to hear what you have to say. So Zach sits down with Jesse to talk about his heartbreak on Rachel's season. But I don't remember what exactly. went down. Did we ever get the full scoop or the full picture on what went down in Zach and Rachel's fantasy suite? Not really. They were very, um, like, avoidant about what actually

happened. Rachel's version of events was just like I, like we just were not compatible. Like, we spent some time together and we had these conversations and we just did not die to eye to eye and like we don't vibe. And that made everybody think that they had like a, like a disagreement on one of the big things in life, you know, like politics or like sex, religion, whatever. something like that. But we, right. We have no idea, though. That's just the assumption based on how Rachel was talking about it.

And Zach, at the same time, said similar things at first, but then in later times, I feel like maybe on, like, maybe after the final rose or maybe at like mental all. I'm not sure exactly when he said, he started like kind of talking shit. Like not so much in a mean way, but in a way of like, you know, Rachel, I was never going to get there with Rachel. basically it was like the vibe and so it makes me think that that there was some salt there that we don't know about and we're constantly even on cutting stamps we're constantly being like what the hell happened with them in that fantasy suite because it didn't it did not end well or so we're led to believe i know i keep trying so i text rachel before this podcast because she just had so she just had surgery i think she got her implants removed i believe or a reduction

oh yeah yeah yeah yeah reduction she's getting a reduction yeah okay i saw her post about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, good for her. I said to Rachel, I said two things. One, how are you feeling post-surgery? I've been thinking about you. Two, are you high enough on your painkillers to send me a voice note of what really went down in the fantasy suite between you and Zach? I'm podcasting. I really want to hear your side of it, but she hasn't responded to me. So I'll just wait and maybe by the end of the pod, it'll be there. That would be so nice, because honestly, I'm dying to know. Like I just feel like there, it must have been a disagreement on like basic principles. Like it's, and that's kind of how it was presented to us. And, you know, when that happens, that happens. It's, there's no going back. There's no middle ground. If people don't want to like give and take or or be open to listening on the people's sides of things, then that's it. But I will say about, I am more inclined without knowing the facts, I am already more inclined to side with Rachel only because I feel like Zach's.

attitude towards people who have tried to like open up to him is very quick to just write them off. And I've said that the whole season that whenever the girls come to him and they say something along the lines of like, I'm just feeling nervous about this process or I'm just feeling a little anxious and it just sucks not being the only one. The stuff that everyone says, Zach, or earlier on, was just cutting girls left and right for talking like that just in a way of like, well, nothing I could do about it. So bye. And it was just kind of. I don't know. It felt dismissive.

So I'm not sure. I agree. I was saying the same thing. And then I got really nervous for Gabby when Gabby started getting emotional because then she feels like she can't really like come to him and say these things. Because she's like, well, if I do, I'll probably get like sent home. And so he has started to shift a little bit because she said that. And then he started opening up about his insecurities. And that was kind of a nice moment just because I was like, oh, finally.

Because I agree, you just never know what is going through his mind. mind, you're like, oh gosh, she had a little breakdown. Is he going to send her home now? Like, I never know what he's going to do. I mean, I always know what he's going to do, but I never know like which girls get in the boot. Yeah. And also too, even going off of that, that conversation he had with Gabby once it got to their time and like the fantasy suites, their alone time, he reacted to that very poorly right away. Like off the bat was like, and then changed his tune when he realized, oh no, that's not how I'm supposed to be acting. And I think that was maybe the first instance I've seen of Zach with growth on the whole season. Like I was surprised that he backtracked and like almost I guess he just showed his vulnerability. It had been a while like just because you're crying on camera doesn't mean that you're vulnerable. Does that make sense? Like I feel like he cries a lot, but that doesn't mean he's like showing us who he is all the time. Yeah. No, I totally agree. It's it just feels like at this point in the process, he's probably so tired and emotional and like that the tears are just naturally coming out. But you're right. That doesn't necessarily mean you're being vulnerable just because tears are coming.

out of your eyeballs um but i just wonder and worry if he's trying too hard to be like a sean low and like so he has been like i'm going to be the good guy no drama everybody always wonders why people keep the dramatic girls around so if they're showing any drama i'm going to just send them home and then he's like you know no sex of of any kind which thank you for clarifying no sex of any kind because i was like sex comes in all shapes and forms so thank you for clarifying. That is true. I didn't even think about that. I always, when I think fantasy suites, I'm like, oh, yeah, they're fucking. But I didn't even think, like, what's a, blowjob? Like, I don't know. Is it off the table? Like, who knows? Yeah. So when he said that,

I was like, oh, wow. So, like, strictly just making out, okay. And, but I don't know why he set himself up for failure like that, because he's not a virgin. And I totally, first of all, want to say that I respect any decision in the fantasy suites. I respect if you're a virgin. I respect if you want to have sex with all three of them. I respect. if you're like actually I know who the one is so I'm going to hold off like I respect all different perspectives on the fantasy suite I just think he wasn't being true to himself he wasn't being authentic of like what he actually wanted out of it and that's going to backfire as it did okay peloton workouts are made to work for you I know in the past I've definitely tried a few

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the show. Listen to The Bachelor podcast now on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcast. I think you're so spot on with that, especially the part where you said that he's trying, it's almost like he's trying too hard to be a Sean Lowe and not necessarily like trying to limit himself and saying that he's not allowed to have sex with anybody just like self-imposing this rule. I don't understand why he did it, but I do think that he wants it, he wants people to get how serious he is about the situation. And I understood his reasoning where he was like, I want to go into this and talk and spend time and see if we fit on the same level and not have

sex like cloud my judgment, which I get. And I think that also stems a little bit from the situation with Rachel. I think that like maybe they went into that thinking we could have sex. and they just, like, flat out disagreed on whatever, and then it wasn't on the table, and maybe he or she got disappointed that they, like, didn't end up hooking up or whatever. And so I think maybe in his head, sex is over-complicating things,

so he's just going to take it off the table. The thing, though, is that he could have just, in his own heart, been like, I'm not going to have sex with these girls, and he didn't have to make an announcement and, like, make this rule, and set it up for himself, like you said, for failure. But my favorite part of the whole thing,

because I knew when he was saying, like, I'm going to make this rule, and I'm going to tell these girls the rules. we've had girls, like women on The Bachelor do this before. Emily Maynard did that. Emily Maynard, who I always referenced her season, like one of my favorite seasons of all time. She just was so, she was really real.

She was really blunt. That's why I like her. Similar to you, I love you as well. But she, like her having a kid and like the whole thing. And that was her like main reasoning for not wanting to be having sex. Like my daughter's going to be watching this and I don't want to look like I've had sex with all these men. Totally understand. It's I think this may be the first time that we've seen a man like, no, no, no, absolutely not.

But the thing with it is like whenever he was talking to Ariel, he, uh, was explaining this to her and her face and response was so hilarious. She was like, I mean, thanks, but like, you know, I don't know if we were going to have sex at all. Like that's in my head, I'm like, it's pretty presumptuous of you to assume like all these women are lining up to like climb you like a tree. Like it's just hilarious to me. And I get what he means, but it's so funny.

Like it's insane. That is, that is funny because he was just assuming all three wanted to have sex when I'm like, have you even had that conversation? It was like, they had not even had the conversation of like, what are your thoughts on that? He was like, just so you know, no sex for you tonight. Like, it was so bizarre. Like, don't even try it, girl. Don't even try it.

Like, he was having a wonderful, like, romantic day with Ariel and it was all going great. It was sexy. Like, he's so clearly sexually attracted her, like, all this stuff. Halfway through dinner, he's like, by the way, like, you know, forget it. And her response of being like, thanks, but okay. And then her being like, well, now that you've told me we can't have sex, like, we're probably going to have sex because now, now I want to, like a little bit of reverse psychology accidentally.

I agree. I agree. I thought it was just in now as somebody that's been through the show and thinks about these things. I'm like, well, that was for sure like a producer moment where they say, okay, you should probably tell each one of the women when you sit down, like what the expectations are. And then that same thing, which we'll get into with when he tells Katie. I obviously had a personal experience

with that exact same thing and I saw you tweet about actually we'll get there, we'll get there I do want to talk about Ariel and keep going with her first because she is going to be the hot commodity of paradise like she is going to be in I would

show up for her if I was single like she is same yeah I am so into her she is so cool like everything she does her reactions her words like she is so full. I can't get over it. Like, even her response, you know, later on, we can talk about it after, even her response to when like she goes home, blah, blah, blah. Yes. So perfect, so adult,

like really thoughtful, sweet, like moving on. People will be lining up like all the way back to the United States from Mexico in, in paradise for her. Like, she is so not Bachelor Nation, which is so hot. You're completely right. Not like being online is hot. Like I don't, I think maybe it's a part, maybe it has to do with the fact that, like, we, uh, like we are online all the time and we want a break. And so having someone that's not online or that's not so involved in the thing that you're doing is like, you know, chef's kiss. It really is. Um, I also don't love and I feel like they do this every fucking season and it's starting to irritate me is they always make fun of other cultures food. Like they're always like, ew, disgusting. Oh, the people. Oh, let's eat this. It always

doesn't do that. Yeah, I'm like, stop. Every time. And I understand, like, yes, you go to Thailand, you're going to eat bugs. That's out of the ordinary. That is, whoa, that's crazy. We don't get that in the United States. But then the minute they ate them, they're like, wow, this is delicious. Obviously, people eat bugs on a stick all the time over there. It's obviously not bad if it's over there. Like, why are we making fun? Like, it's crazy. It's just cool. Every season of every bachelor episode, you were always somewhere where you eat a bug off a stick. And, but I like that they made, you know, They actually, like, enjoyed themselves and it was cute and whatever. Yeah, that was good.

But you're right about that, about the make of fun of the food. It's weird. It is weird. Every time. So let's go back to her reaction, kind of when Zach says sex is off the table. And she says she doesn't like to have a set plan, which like, did you hear later in the episode, I feel like he said something about how he had an intimate moment with Ariel. He, yes. when they woke up in the morning and they were,

she said something like very, like, not clickbaity, but like, I don't know, she said something like, we were, we were in so many different positions. And he was like, well, you mean when we're sleeping? And she was like, yes, I didn't even think about that, whatever. I think after that he mentioned something like, yeah, we shared like an intimate night and blah, blah, blah.

But to me, that came across, like, he was saying that their conversation. and all that was intimate versus anything else. Although, I mean, I don't know. Maybe if he, maybe he didn't have sex with her. And so that's why he didn't feel like he had to tell. Meanwhile, he did have sex with Gabby. And then he was like, I broke my no sex rule, but I didn't break my, you know, my no blowjob rule.

Like I said, I didn't have that. There could be a little bit of a gray area there. And do you think that's why he didn't tell Ariel that he had sex with Gabi is because he knew he was sending her home? or like what like why didn't he tell her that probably because he knew i think so i think at that point i think after what happened with katy how he told her about it and katy was like i don't want to know i think then he was like now he's scarred forever now he's never going to tell anybody everything again because he thought he was doing the right thing and she was like i don't want to hear that shit and so he was like oh my god i'm not telling anybody anything i think when

it comes to ariel it's like he's just cutting his losses send her home no need to add salt to the wound. And I hope they had a conversation before she saw it on TV, because if I'm her, I'm pissed being like, well, what the hell? But also, she's so cool that she probably was like, whatever. Like, that guy's crazy. He kind of said it at the rose ceremony. Like, he kind of said, like, I hurt some feelings and I made some mistakes. Like, she's probably like, what the fuck happened? A hundred percent. Yeah. She's like, what? Like, everything seemed fine. But yeah, she handled it like a freaking boss. And she was amazing. And then, okay, another part that I

LOLed at this episode is when he went to hang out with Gabby and he's like, he looked beautiful and she's like, I look crusty. I'm like, Krusty. Oh my God. Poor Gabby with a she was having a bad day. And I was laughing because I was like, this girl is like on another level.

Like I honestly at one point I was like, is she drunk? Like what's going on with Gabby? Like she is spiraling out. And I understand like, you know, the whole situation is so insane. it's so out of the out of the ordinary and it's hard after this you know length of time dealing with all this her talking so much shit on herself i felt terrible that she was feeling that way but i was cracking up because we've all been there where i like two days ago i was like my my face is

so stupid i hate my whole life i can't believe this is how i look like it's just like shitting on herself we've all been there girl so i get it i get it i was saying i even wrote in my notes i was like relatable because it's like I there's always and everybody that listens to this podcast knows what I'm going to say but it's always a hormonal thing for me where like same to a T without fail one week of every month I will just shit on myself and I'll be like in the mirror and I'll be like a this and this and I'll pick myself apart and then a week later I'm like I'm the tits like I'm so hot and I like talk to it I like high five myself it's so stupid yes already there vinoes it's time for some romance it's that time of the pod my peloton romance

roundup uh i think this is actually my last roundup with peloton wamp wamp wamp you know that sound from prices right oh no just me okay a little sad to tell you the truth but don't worry i'll keep giving my thoughts on the bachelor and also making you guys share you're very embarrassing stories with me as I always do. Okay, so this week I'm actually recording from London and it's been such a fun trip so far. I can't wait to give you guys

some tips and tricks and some restaurant recommendations and shopping and the streets and the tube, how to get your way around a tube, I don't know. So for the Romance Roundup, naturally I thought it'd be fun to have you guys share some of your romantic travel stories well, not

romantic, but romance gone wrong, I shall say, while on a trip. I'm sorry, I just feel like since I have to give confessions all the time, I need to, like, hold you accountable to be on the same level as me. And like I said before, you guys just never disappoint. So before we get into it, a real quick word about Peloton, who sponsors are Romance Roundups. Peloton workouts are made to work for you. They really have movement for every level no matter where you are in your fitness journey. So whether you're a pro or you're just getting started, their rower works 86% of your muscles in just 15 minutes. We'd love to see that.

Okay, so a few quick responses to my story question box about this that are just so good. So one person said, if you can be stuck in a tube on a tarmac for three plus hours with your significant other, you'll make it. What do you think about this? I don't know. That seems a little. I would say like an eight hour road trip or like three days in the middle of nowhere where you have to like maybe pooping for each other. But anyways, someone said their quick travel story is ringworm. on my butt and full body hives on our honeymoon. I shouldn't have laughed at that. That is traumatic and tragic. It was a real good time, she said.

I'm so sorry. I mean, ringworm on your butt, but then full body hives on top of all that. It just seems like, like, what did you do to deserve that? You must have good karma coming your way if you didn't do anything. Okay, that's a nightmare. This one might be worse. Someone said, stomach bug day one.

Once, quote unquote, recovered, I did a risky toot, pooped a little bit in bed. You know what? I risked it for the biscuit today. I actually felt so sick. Thought I was going to throw up or faint. One of the two, I kept getting hot flashes and had to step on a two and a half hour train. And I did not know if I was going to make it. But you know, you girl made it. Okay, this is less about travel, but more just freaking sad. And I had to share it in honor of Taylor Swift's era's tour. This person says, my brother took his girlfriend to a Taylor Swift concert, and she broke up with him on the four-hour ride home. We need to, like, not know the words and you question everything. That's like Jason with not watching friends. I'm

questioning everything. Okay, so I really hope this doesn't happen to any of my vinos. Don't do this to your boyfriend, okay? Please. Someone said, me and my significant other flew to Paris for New Year's Eve and got food poisoning. Both got violently ill sharing one bathroom. I can't even think about this still because my stomach's still like a little weak from the train ride. So I'm just going to move along. Okay. Then I have a couple longer stories from the DMs that I have to share these with you guys. Kate, so I love going through DMs. You know, sometimes people say really beautiful things, sometimes really meaningful things. Sometimes there's trolls. And then there's other times that just open up to me and I just love it. Okay. So my boyfriend and I were on a camping trip. We were staying

in a 10. It was our first night of the trip and I hadn't been feeling well. Woke up in the middle of the night with a number two emergency. Could not make it to walk. to the bathroom, so I leaned up against a tree behind our tent and had the worst diarrhea. Oh, my tummy. Okay, after thinking, I got myself all cleaned up. It was very dark, P.S., and she was afraid of bears. So she said, I walked back to the tent, and my boyfriend goes, oh, my God, did you wipe? Turns out I had diarrhea all over my shoes, and now in the tent. I burst into tears, and he had to walk me to the showers, shower me, and clean out the tent at 2 a.m. Bless his soul. That is a real relationship right there. I would like to know if they're still together.

if you can get through poop in a tent. Now that's what I'm talking about. Someone else said I almost shit my pants walking around downtown Hong Kong with my now husband and his mom. We finally found a bathroom in time. But the worst part was I was wearing a romper. So I was naked in the bathroom stall. His mom kept coming in the bathroom to check on me. And it was so embarrassing. I'm sure that felt really terrible in the moment. But what a supportive hubby and mother-in-law? like knowing just zero shame everywhere. Guys, I love that for you guys. Okay, I really cannot thank you guys enough for opening up about all of these things.

I feel like making a segment out of it just gives us that little tidbit so I get to know my vino's a bit better and everyone gets to know about all of their vino friends. So thanks for giving me all of these not so romantic travel experiences. And I'm really hoping I can't and glad I haven't so far. I've been close, but I haven't been able to relate to any of these during the trip. Okay, but if you do, it might be some karma coming my way for making you guys embarrass yourselves, but then you could just share it with me. And then I share with you anyways, even the most cringe-worthy moments can be a little romantic sometimes.

Those are very intimate stories, and you got through it on the other side together. And speaking of romance, you guys can try the Peloton Row risk-free with a 30-day home trial. New members only, not available in remote locations. see additional terms at one peloton.com slash home dash trial I am the exact same like I know I know when I'm like about to get my period because I'm really shitting on myself

like I'm really like wow Kelly you're being horrible and there's something you can do about it I'll go in I'll like read meme comments about myself I'm like yeah they're right because I am a piece of shit and then next week I'm like fuck haters they're jealous That is me

Like every Like without fail I am so Predictable each week of my mind What what Caitlin shows up And it's so funny Because maybe that's where Gabby Maybe Gabby was just starting her period

And she was like, holy fuck Had to have been All the emotions mixed with hormones No thank you I did like we said Zach handled it better than we probably thought he would And then it all kind of started to make sense because Gabby was talking about being cheated on and how feeling second in her

relationship. So that's why she's so triggered, which, oh, my God, of course, then they make him call the Rose second for her. I was like, oh, you guys. I was like, she literally went on a 20-minute rant about, like, her biggest insecurity being chosen second. She got cheated on, all this stuff, all these things. And the first thing they do is put her in the most traumatic situation possible. Like, what a fucking nightmare. I, you know, the producers, they stay, they stay working. They never, they never stop working. There's a special place in hell, but they're just, they're good at their jobs. Yes, there is.

Yes, they are. It's pretty, yeah, it really is. It's the best and the worst. Wait, Gabby told Zach she's falling in love with him and he looks so excited. And then later in the episode, when he goes to talk to her, he says he's falling in love with her back. Is she the only person he's said that to? I believe so. And I was shocked by that.

And I thought that, and this is where it gets a little touchy because we were saying this last line on cutting stems. And Ria was agreeing with me. Fran was a little on the fence. Trent didn't really have, like, it was like girl stuff, so he didn't really know. But I was saying that like because Gabby was being so vulnerable, like she was the vulnerable girl who like wanted reassurance. And that's what was happening. And I think that once she already, once she started that path, that was the only way to end it. And I think that Zach is somebody who just wants to fix a problem and wants to make you feel better and wants things to go well for you.

So I think that he pulled out the big guns. Like, you are beautiful. You are wonderful. I'm going to tell you about myself. I'm going to tell you I'm falling for you. And I'm going to have sex with you. Yeah. I think that that's kind of just how it went.

And I think that doesn't necessarily mean that that Gabby is like wrong for that. But I do recognize someone doing that because I've done that shit too. I've done that shit where I like, I'll be crying all night. I'll be needing attention. I'll want that validation, and I'll let myself look like the damsel in distress because it's working. And I just think that that's kind of what happened. Yeah, I agree.

But I do think that it's going to be hard for her if Zach doesn't pick her. I think that that is, I think her world will come crashing down. As far as that breakdown looked, it looks like those insecurities are really deep. And it sucks that, like, I don't know. At this point, I am not sure who he's going to pick between the two girls because I feel like he has a different kind of like connection, obsession with both of them. And I just don't know what kind of person he is yet. Like, I still feel like I'm not quite sure where he's going to go. I know. I'm so curious because I'm like, I actually really loved his connection with Ariel.

I was like, oh my gosh, like they would. And especially when he was, you know, trying to be the Sean Lowe. And he was like, well, she didn't stand out to me at the beginning. And it just like really hit me in the face at one point where he was like, and I was like, oh my God, they're going to be like the next Sean and Catherine. And then he was like, yeah, no sex. And I was like, oh, my God, maybe they are going to be the Sean and Catherine. And then this is happening now. And now she's gone. So I was like, oh, never mind about that. I was shocked. I was shocked by that too. I thought the minute that he, when he had that one-on-one day with Ariel a couple weeks ago, after that date, I was like, she's winning to the top. Like, I was sold completely. Same. Same. And, okay, I'm like jumping all over the place. But another part that I LOL that is when he has to, like sit down with Jesse to like say that we agreed to have sex but he says uh we wanted to have sex together i'm like okay as opposed to a part or he's so yeah right like as opposed to what he is so uncomfortable talking about sex saying the word sex like it's he has a really hard time with it even when he later is explaining to katy about how we did have sex with gavie even though

he said that he wasn't going to have sex with anyone and he didn't even explain that to katie he had so she didn't even know that he had that rule yet just really blew up blew it all up on himself he wouldn't even say the word sex he kept being like we had an experience and we had a moment with each other and you know yeah and i'm like just say like listen we had sex or you don't have to say anything at all clearly for katy she had no problem with it it felt like he put so much shame around sex like it's a bad thing and i'm that's what i'm sick of on the show too is like we're putting so much shame on freaking sex

and like what that looks like for people because it's like a couple of the girls said it. They're like, well, sex is kind of important to me in a relationship and that should just be okay. I completely agree with that. So let's go into talking about how he brings it up to Katie. Now, I saw on Twitter you said he didn't, what was your tweet?

I can't remember. So he said to Katie, he was like, listen, I had sex to this girl. I implemented this rule for myself. This is what was going to happen. whatever my tweet had to do with her saying that once he told her this information she was like that's between like you and your other relationships treat this as like its own silo and I don't want to know what's going on in your other relationships and at the time I was watching I was like yeah

tell him I was like let's go because it seemed like she was confident in it and she was like I don't give a fuck about what you do with the other girls like I'm confident in myself in our relationship and I don't want to hear about it so I liked that as the episode went on it's sort of like it didn't it didn't uh hit exactly the same i sort of felt like she said that because she just like needs to block that stuff out to be okay with it and so then i was like oh now now it's always gonna rear its ugly head like you're you're just i don't want to hear it i don't want to hear it because you don't want to like process it not because you genuinely don't care right and and i was thinking back uh as to when so i i had to tell sean that i had sex with nick

and it was this big thing and i remember sean I don't know if they aired this or not, but I remember Sean looking at me and going, why are you telling me this? Like, I don't want to know. Why are you telling me this? Guys are like that, though. Guys never want to know. As a woman, I'm always wanting to know. I'm so, I'm like, but do you know what show you're on?

This is going to air. And would you like me to tell you now or do you want me to tell you while we're sitting at home engaged and you're like, what the fuck? Like, wouldn't you want to know now? And like, yeah, of course I could tell you in the fantasy suite off camera. but like to me that is not giving Sean a fair opportunity to have his own feelings and reactions because then he might just look like a closed off dickhead on the next filming day and nobody's going to know why and the storyline doesn't make sense and it all just like having so many different conversations with producers I was like I don't I don't know if I like

want to tell him yet or can't I do this off camera and they're like give him the opportunity to react how he feels necessary like you can't can't just have this like broken storyline where it doesn't make sense. So then I watched this episode going, oh, okay, well, he has to tell Katie. One, because he wants to be really straight up and honest with her. Two, he's not going to like tell her later and then have a different reaction. Like, I think he just wanted to like get it off the table. But I saw kind of both sides of it. But what did you think about Katie saying to Gabby at the Rose ceremony? I know you were the only one. That was a moment. I honestly like had chills. Like that's

me was, it was cool, but bitchy. Oh my God. Like, I mean, and I, you know, I, you know me, I respect like the bluntness, the bitchiness, like whatever. Apparently, we, people were saying this in our, in the chat and cutting stems last night that, uh, Katie and Gabby are good friends. And so in my head up, which I, I haven't really seen on the show. So I don't, I don't know if that's true or not. But apparently they're good friends. And I feel like maybe that came from a place of like, listen, like, don't worry about it. I already know. Like, we're not, please don't worry about it. Like, I can see your stressing. I can feel your stress. Whatever. It could have been that tone, but it sounded very, it sounded very like, I knew it was you. And that to me is hilarious.

Like, I don't, it was just, it was a really dramatic moment. But then I go, so does that mean he didn't have sex with Katie? It kind of seems like he didn't, but they didn't like, why wouldn't he, I guess? But maybe it's kind of like a, maybe though like and this is where it gets weird because he had sex with gabby Katie's upset to hear that but then if he has sex with Katie does it then look like he's just having sex with Katie because he's trying to make up for the fact that he had sex with Gabby and I'm sure in Zach's head that's what he's worrying about because I think he really likes Katie a lot like I think he likes Katie most I do too I do too so I was thinking that and and maybe even Katie was like hey let's like put that on hold because I'm like still a little bit

upset and if you chose to do that with her like if it is me at the end then like then we can have that moment um but that's going to be something i mean that's always something for something difficult for couples to get through after the show so i'm curious to see who he picks and what the conversation after that looks like because if it's katy it's going to be something they're going have to work through if it's gabby i i also feel like she'd have a really tough time watching the season back if they're together you know what i mean like that's going to be so interesting I completely agree, completely agree. Like, Gabby, I'm very interested in whatever, whatever way that it goes, I'll be interested

in Gabby's thoughts on, like, after final rose. Like, I'm dying to know more about that moment, more about, like, what happened with the relationship. I just, I feel like something was unsaid, you know what I mean? Like, something was going on. Even that day that she was so emotional, like, yes, I get an emotional day, but they're just, I just feel like there, there has to be more to it. And I'm very curious.

Yeah, me too. I'm very curious, and this is why I always love the finale's because it's live. So as much like as these, they can be coached or whatever, they're really going to say, you can read it all over body language and you can like kind of get a grasp of what they're trying to say. And then the fun stuff happens where I'm actually coming to New York on at the end of the month to podcast with Zach. Oh, fabulous. Oh, I say you should come. Well, Caitlin, I don't know if you know.

I've been slinging a new show myself these days. have you seen? It's called On the Other Line. It's my own little show. And I love it so much, but I would love to have you on. Oh, come on. Excellent. Perfect. So let me know when you're in town and you'll come on. Did I just like pressure you to inviting me on? No. Listen, I am always looking for people to come on the show and guests to come on the show. But I'll be honest, I haven't like, I haven't done a lot of reaching out because it's a little hard to schedule. But if you're in town and I know in advance, I can schedule ahead. I love chatting with you. So that'd be so lovely. You can see my a little set. I have a little, a little set with, you know, this is like my house and my

wallpaper. But I have a set at work and I look like a real adult. So you must come. Oh, you are a real adult. Oh, that's exciting. Okay, I definitely will come. No, yes, I can. Thank you so much for coming on the pod. Thanks for having me on. I'm Caitlin Bristow. Your session is now ending. Thanks for joining us for this week's Great Therapy. Don't forget to rate, review, and follow on your favorite podcast platform. And tune in Thursday for your next session. This episode was brought to you by Peloton. Peloton workouts are made to work for you,

and the Peloton Rower is made for you whether you're a pro already or you're just getting started. You can try Peloton Rrow risk-free with a 30-day home trial, new members only, not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepellaton.com slash home-dash trial.