Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Grape Therapy: Bachelorette Recap (packed with flaws) with Michael A

Episode Date: July 29, 2021

Michael A has won the hearts of basically the entire world with his down to earth and very real approach to his time on Katie’s season of The Bachelorette. With a past filled with great loss, he shares that being on the show was not even close to the most stressful thing he has ever done. This week was his emotional departure and he joins Kaitlyn to share more about his journey with Katie and his decision to return home to his young son. But do not let his kindness be mistaken for weakness, Michael A is as strong and witty (and secretly a little wild) as they come. Kaitlyn digs deep to uncover some of his many many mannnny flaws and more of the witty comebacks we only got a taste of during his time on the show. Kaitlyn and Michael A also share more behind the scenes topics and happenings from the Men Tell All that the rest of us didn’t get to see. You can find Michael A on IG at @michael_alliol4 GOODY’S - To purchase, go to Amazon and use code 1VINE to receive a discount off a 4 count 6 pack! VIZZY HARD SELTZER - Upgrade your hard seltzer to Vizzy. Go to vizzyhardseltzer.com/VINE RESPECT - See RESPECT only in theatres August 13. But tickets now at respect.movie OXICLEAN - Visit oxicleancoupons.com where a coupon is waiting for you. GEICO - Go to geico.com and in 15 minutes you could be saving 15% or more on car insurance. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Okay, let's talk about the original enemies to lovers story. Before all of our reality TV couples, before the rom-coms, we binge, there was Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in pride and prejudice. And Audible has just dropped a brand new original that will have you completely hooked, I am. It's not just any audiobook. This is a full cast performance. So Marisa Abella, you might know her from industry, brings Elizabeth Bennett to life.

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So whether it's your first time experiencing Pride and Prejudice or you've read it a million times, you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again. So go listen to Pride and Prejudice now at audible.ca slash Jane Austen. Who's on with OTV? Podcast One presents Off the Vine, Grace Therapy. Caitlin Bristow's going to answer your questions. Drink to your concessions and hear what you have to say about anything Bachelor. Let's shake it up some more. Here's Caitlin.

Welcome to Great Therapy. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. If ever there was a nice guy like the nicest of guys, Michael A. is it. Honestly, he is a freaking gem of a human who we all fell in love with on this season, as he vulnerably shared his difficult past of loss and his endless optimism. I had the absolute pleasure of chatting with him this week after we all saw his dramatic exit, saying goodbye to Katie to get home to his young son, who he missed dearly, who also makes a little cameo in the podcast. His voice, his little voice, James is so sweet.

He shares more about his role as a dad and his difficult decision to say goodbye to Katie, how incredible it was to reunite with his son. A few little wild secrets come out and whose celebrity crushes. My heart just kind of like goes out to him because I think he is still feeling feelings for Katie, and he talks a little bit about that. I love that. I love you. of them even more than I did before. I can't wait for you to hear from him. So let's get into my conversation with the dad of the year. Michael A. Hello. Hey, what's up? Do you like my floating microphone? It's a magic trick. Oh, my gosh. What's underneath the blanket? Oh, my gosh. Okay, I'm in a hotel room and it's so echoey. So I'm trying to like makeshift.

have a like studio here so that it doesn't sound so echoy but that's we're going to have to work with this like honestly before we start you did an awesome job like i know you and tasha have gotten so much shit from trolls and people that suck but yeah you guys are amazing you just really did an amazing job thank you for saying that wait you don't want that to be on my podcast is that why you said before we start yeah because i'm totally going to trash you so this is the real stuff now I get to create the drama. Oh, fair enough. You know what.

First of all, how did you even get on the show again? So they reached out to me on Instagram, and I wasn't nominated. I didn't apply or anything. Basically, do you know, Lindsay Liles? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so her husband, I guess, was creating some sort of app for nonprofit, like, application. And on her Instagram, L4 project came up as, like, like somebody they should know because L4 would technically be a user of this application.

And then it became like her kind of digging in on who I was, like my story. Then she reached out. And yeah, I mean, I said no to it twice too. I mean, I was just like, this is not like how I want to do it at 37 years old. Like just not my thing. And then, yeah, I was just like, you know, what the hell? Let's do it. Yeah.

And for people who don't know, can you share what L4 is? is. Yeah, so L4, it's a nonprofit that I started about two months after my wife, Laura, passed away from breast cancer. So it started in 2019. And what L4 is, is it's actually a clothing brand that we partner with select charities all across the country whose mission is really to, one, improve cancer outcomes, but also improve the cancer journey for patients for care, caregivers for people who are grieving. Cancer doesn't just hit one person or the person that's diagnosed. It's got a massive ripple effect. And so what we do is kind of give people an opportunity to participate in helping the mission by buying clothing and that clothing, all the proceeds,

do go to these charities all across the country. So it's kind of a way to wear you like your heart on your sleeve. It's a way to participate to bring awareness, but also raise like crucial financial resources for these great like 501c3 organizations that depend on it on a regular basis wow that's incredible i mean i feel like you truly made this season like a lot more real i think you know with bachelor bachelor bachelor at usually you travel to all these extravagant places do these incredible dates and i think we we like to get lost in that fantasy but in the world that we live in right now i think people crave connection more than anything in like realness. And I feel like you and talking about Laura's legacy, I think it helped a lot of

us as viewers, even though I was there. I watched as a viewer, you know, it helped us kind of come back down to earth and remember that life is so short. And I know there's, first of all, I'm going to repeat myself a lot because you and I had a pretty decent conversation on stage at Mental All that obviously gets cut down. So I'm going to probably repeat myself. But you had said something about, you know, how kind of like the ripple effect. When you try and find love again, it's not just you. You've got James.

You've got in-laws that you're very close to. You've got your family. And they kind of have to take, like you said to me on stage, that awkward step to find love again. How did that conversation go for you to go on to the bachelorette with your in-laws and everyone? Yeah.

It's a really complicated issue. And I mean, since I was on the show, my inbox and my DMs are just filled with people who are, you know, cancer survivors, people that are going through it, you know, caregivers, all these single parents. And the themes that I'm talking about aren't unique to me. They are very, they are very obvious topics that only people who have gone through these types of things can relate to. And unfortunately, it's across the board. They know what I'm

talking about. Like when I first got approached to go on to the show, my first thing was just I don't want to do this. It's doubt. Like you only see the downside risk because you don't see the benefits. You don't know who the guys are. You don't really know who Katie is. You just see like this life of being criticized and scrutinized and, you know, asked to play bashball every single day for a whole month, you know, which is a dangerous sport. very dangerous for an old guy like me should never be out there you know but made up game anyways yeah right i know um stupid but but then but then it all kind of kicks in and you start thinking you know what if you know what if what if something special happens here and you know

2019 lost laura 2020 was covid so covid really i mean there's so many people that just were alone during that time, including myself, that when this opportunity came, it was just like, what a perfect time to do something for me. And whether or not that was like finding love, which I felt incredible feelings for Katie, incredibly real, still real right now, unfortunately. Yeah. But then it was just like, it feels good to feel something sometimes, even if it is just, Even if it's pain because I went through a decent amount of time where I just felt like numb. And that's the scariest part. Yeah.

I mean, there's so many feelings to grief. And I think numb is probably one of them. And you probably had the time to go through so many of those stages in COVID because you're just, you know, kind of. I think everyone was forced to just be alone with their thoughts. And so when you go through something like that, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You were able to kind of go through all of those phases in probably a shorter amount of time because you're just, you know, in quarantine. And I mean, you have James. So you're probably not just like twiddling your thumbs. But no. Yeah. You were probably able to process some more feelings before moving on to going on something like The Bachelorette. Yeah. And there's also this thing where, you know, your grieving doesn't start like the day they pass away. You're almost anticipating a loss once cancer takes a certain route.

And, you know, for us, we had gotten two cancer-free diagnosis. We rang the bell. We went on like multiple vacations to celebrate. So like that roller coaster, I mean, for a while, just it's weird how your body adjusts and your mind adjusts. And it just becomes what you're used to, your reality. And, you know, once. Laura passed away, you know, I had processed as much as I could up to that point, obviously

not knowing how I would feel, you know, months after, years after, which they, like, grief has a way of evolving and kind of changing what it looks like and what it feels like over that span of time. But when I started making kind of these strides to say, all right, like, James isn't going to lose both of his parents due to cancer. Like, I could be here, but I couldn't be present. You know, I was, I was somewhere else. And it's already taken so much from us that I didn't want it to take anymore. And so I started kind of taking these really difficult and uncomfortable steps towards trying to see how it would feel like to have a relationship again.

And when you're taking those steps, the other people who have been in your life this whole time, they don't work at the same pace you do. And so as you're marching forward, some people misinterpret that as like moving on or forgetting or whatever. And it's really a survival mechanism. And so you have to deal with that complexity of trying to make sure that that they understand that you're not moving on. You're trying to move forward the best way you can. And time itself doesn't heal a loss. Like there's always that hole there. But you kind of just learn how to how to live with it while still trying to make the best out of your situation.

Yeah, absolutely. I think so many people can unfortunately relate to that. And like you said, in your DMs, you have all these stories and people sharing things with you. And I just think of everything you have gone through and, you know, you and James must have such a special bond. because, well, obviously, father, son, bond, but just like, I don't know, I feel like he was probably such a light for you during that time. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, Laura was diagnosed when James was seven months old. Wow. Yeah. So, I mean, you went from having your first child and all the complexities that happened there, but at the core, it's just joy, but it's just busy. And then you have that whole perspective. shift when you get a cancer diagnosis, you're like, oh my God, I have a child now. We're frantically racing against the clock trying to figure out what this problem is and how do we fix it and how do we

still live our life while undergoing all of this at the same time. And, you know, one, Laura, honestly, if people looked up some of her videos online, they would see like the courageous this woman. She is. She did it with so much grace and humor and was so brave. And the person that you see on any of those videos, that's who she was when the camera stopped. Like, if someone said, that sounds like Laura, it did. And everybody had the same, like, testimonial of her. She was just consistently good and great and vulnerable and, and flawed, but in a, like a wonderful kind way, you know, but going back to like the seven months, like James and I developed such a cool bond because, you know, this is, when he's so young at this point, these are typically moments

when, you know, maybe the father pretends like he's like sleeping when the baby's crying in the middle of the night, you know? Yeah, and he's like, oh, I didn't hear anything. And you're like, yeah, you did, buddy. Like, it's your turn. But, you know, it just happens. I mean, I did that. leading up to this. But once she was kind of diagnosed, I got to go upstairs and spend those nights with them like in sleeping on my chest, like that kind of nurturing bonding moment that I think otherwise would have been missed. And so, you know, you're always trying, at least I am always trying to find some sort of benefit in like all the chaos because it's easy to point out what's wrong in life but it's it's more difficult to see like the little blessings and the little

joys that happen along the way and and try to make sense of them and you know try to work towards just like a better future now back to off the vine grape therapy and have you always been an optimistic person or is this something that shifted for you in this heart time? I would say I typically look on the brighter side. I would say one thing that really empowers me is I really don't like anything out of my control to take hold of my life. Yeah. I don't like to give anything too much power because then I feel like I'm waiting around for something awful to happen. And so now all this has happened. That's all kind of been tested. I know that I can handle, I mean, just about everything and, you know, even going on this show, I think for a lot of, I think for a lot of people, it's the most stressful thing they've ever done in their life.

For me, not even close. So, like, I think a lot of people have reached out and said, you know, how did you not get involved in the drama? You never seem like rattled. It's because I just have more life experience that has taught me that certain things. things don't matter and certain things do, and you can kind of file them away. It's such a good point. You go along with everybody, even probably Carl, you probably got along with. I did. Yeah. But it's, it is interesting because, yeah, it's, you just had a very, like, more mature, I don't know, just the way you carried yourself, and I'm sure it's because of the experiences you've been through.

but I mean people just people were so sad to say I was so sad to see you go I was obviously there but I think a lot of people wanted to know what was a first thing that you did with James when you got home what was that like what we saw was Jane saying oh I can't even like say it out loud it like freaking breaks my heart when he was like I know what the problem is daddy doesn't want to see me anywhere everyone was like oh my gosh so from that time to seeing him what like yeah my producer tears all the tears what was that reunion like so i mean first i've seen some things online where people question whether or not he said it or whether or not that was edited he 100% said that and that was well they they thought it was like this frank and bite kind of thing

and that was actually the main reason why i left like james's at had actually he had been missing me for the last two weeks prior, but it was when it started shifting towards guilt or that I didn't want to see him. That's when it felt more serious and had a sense of urgency. And also, there's also been like some discussions online. Like he was so close. He must not have been that indicated because he would have stuck it out for the next couple days. And I think what people don't understand is, one, as a parent, that was a no-brainer. But two, it wasn't going to be a couple days. It was going to be another two weeks of basically filming.

So part of me felt like it wasn't right for me to stay if my mind and my heart was back with my son and I was halfway there. And I would have taken up somebody else's time and spot and all of that. So I'm happy I made that decision. But long-winded answer for what you're trying to say is what I do and got back.

So I got back late one night and then the next day, James didn't even know, but I packed the entire car. We took a road trip to Chicago, spent a week there. Yeah, that's like a home away from home for me. And so we got to ride the train and go to the beach. And I still have like tons of friends there and, you know, got to see them. And he just loved it. You know, he's a city boy, man. it was like all going down michigan avenue carrying like bags disney bags like you know he's like their product i was like geez little diva okay like like way to way to way to totally like take advantage of my guilty conscience for being away he's like i want that and i want that i want that yeah i'm like i mean he's he's he's smart he knows what's going on and he worked you i love it yeah he's he's

got some of his mama in him for sure. I love that. That's so, so sweet. Again, I know we talked a lot about this on stage, but that departure for you to say goodbye, I mean, you're still, you said, I'm still unfortunately feeling it. I mean, those feelings were so real for you. And I saw it firsthand. I saw it still after on the mental when you said, like, no, I'm still feeling all of these feelings. It's such a weird world to know what you know and to try and move forward and then to see her again and then all these feelings. I talked about this actually with Katie about you close a chapter, but then it's just reopened again. You don't know if it can ever fully be closed. Did you feel like you got closure at the mental law? I mean, I feel like I know like what's next

for both of us and that doesn't mean that there's closure on it like i still have feelings for it but our lives we it doesn't work like when i left when i left i understood that me doing so like she would find happiness she's yeah like so lovable and so deserving of that i also didn't want to be the person that was like you know let me and put that in her ear because the other guys also deserved, you know, to get their fair shot. It's not just me and her in the room. It's everybody's working in. And at the end of the day, I want her to choose me because she's exhausted all other options,

not just me by default or me by guilt. And so, yeah, I mean, seeing her again, yeah, I mean, it opened up a lot of things. But I mean, I'll be honest, too. And I was asked this when I was on set and all the guys were like, why are you ever nervous and this is the truth um you know i talked about being kind of numb leading into this decision night one i got out of the limbo and i felt like that spark like i felt like alive and it was a split second but it was something i just hadn't felt in a long time and that was the that was the reason I came on was to feel that and so after night one it really

felt like mission accomplished like no matter if I got sent home you know the second rose ceremony it was it was just like all of this extra stuff is just you know borrowed time because I know that it's possible and then as our relationship kind of blossomed and you know matured a little bit it just continued to have so much more substance to it and it was wonderful like even though there's all this you know heartbreak and difficulty like you you can't have one without the other and you know I'm just happy that I know now that it's it's possible for me honestly it would not have been possible if it wasn't for Katie like the world hopefully has seen what an amazing human being she is she's got way more depth than i think i even could imagine but she's just just

an amazing person that constantly put the guys feelings and emotions was respectful of all of this first i don't know how she did it i mean it's so difficult amazing like she knew everybody's backstory like everyone's i mean siblings names like it was it was crazy and you felt like when you were with her, you're the only person in the room. I told her that. I said she has this unique ability with compartmentalizing her relationships where she shows up for that person the way they need her to show up. And she's like putting them first. Like she, she will show up the way she needs to for each person separately. And I'm like, God, I wish my ex-boyfriends would talk about me the way that you are. I'm telling you,

I'm going to go back and watch my men tell all. They were mean to me. The guys were mean to me. Like, some of them were like, I have a question for you. Why did you do this? And they were mad. And I was like, oh, my God. Like, you guys all like, actually, they did stand up for me at the end. But that's because I was crying because they were. Yeah.

But I feel like you, all the guys and Katie had such mutual respect for each other. Like, even if it was like a harsh break up, like, even Thomas, like, I was like, God, this is everybody has respect for one another. and it was it was really nice to see but it made me remember how many guys hated me on my season but you're right she she did she she really did have this ability to do that and i'm like just going through my notes of little things that happened on mental all with first of all we had to cut out so much of carl because remember wait were you oh i think everybody was on that date where it was the puppet show i was in the i was in the audience yeah i was in the back he just kept going and going and going and they obviously had to edit so much out that was like the mental all i was like

oh my gosh this guy does not stop we'll have to cut out so much of this and and the same thing was true at mental all as he did on the group date like he just gets going and he doesn't have an understanding of like who's your audience how much time are you allowed it are you saying something that's even relevant or no stops making sense yeah i mean it was it was bananas and when we were at mental all he was still like defending that he like you know did an awesome job at that group date and i was like i was like dude no you didn't like i'm worried about you because we all fall on our face sometimes but the fact that you think you nailed that like you have to like how many dates have you nailed like i want to see when you actually say

like you bombed something like does that mean that you did really well. I don't, I don't know. It didn't make any sense. Like everything that came out of his mouth and then he said like to Brendan, he was just wanted a ticket to the United States to drink beer. I'm like, that doesn't even make sense. Right. That's a really expensive beer. You know, like he can get it, he can get his Labat Blue back in Toronto, you know. Oh, I love Labat Blue. That's my favorite. It's good. It's great. That's Jason's favorite beer, too. I also think you're Jason's favorite human being on the planet. Like he wants to be a friend.

I love Jason. He's from Buffalo, right? He is. See, that totally makes sense because, you know, like the Buffalo, like Pittsburgh, you know, Cleveland, whole thing. Like, we're all Rust Belt cities, you know? It feels like you guys are like honorary Canadians. Like, you guys remind me of Canadian, like my Canadian guys back home.

That's what it feels like. Oh, for sure. I mean, if Lake Erie wasn't there, Toronto would be, like 40 minutes away drive you know like it's so close to me so close yeah so close i know i always love that i could pick out when people are like close to canada i'm like i can smell it well do you do like i remember seeing this stuff online it just shows people's like lack of geography like when katie is from seattle and you know blakes from canada people are like well they're practically neighbors like that would totally make sense and i'm like Like, I live closer to Katie than Blake does.

Like, he's further east than I am. It's not all Vancouver. I, this is my problem. Okay, so I know a lot about the states. We learned about it in school. People do not know anything about Canada. But I'm like, I studied, when I first met Jason, he made me study a map so I knew where each state was so that I could be like familiar with it.

And I was like, I learned about this in school. you did not but it's just so interesting that people um they think Canada is either Vancouver or Toronto there's no other places in Canada to everybody nothing in between it's I think I think I think we all need to have like those placemats you know that you have at restaurants for kids where it's like the whole US and you get to color in different states and provinces yeah people don't even know that they're called provinces like it's i'm very proud of you for that one thank you justin trudeau i'll throw everything i know about canada in one loonies and tunis wow i didn't some people don't know that i did a whole quiz with i think it was jason on a podcast once i think it was i think it was

my fiance about about quizzes about Canada and it's so funny what people know and don't know This is Offs Devine, Grape Therapy. Me as a podcaster is so funny, I'm like, how do I transition into Connor? Let's just jump into it. Connor made out with the girl in the audience. What were you guys thinking when that happened? I mean, as everybody knows already, Connor was a huge favorite of the guys.

He just has like this amazing, yeah, like essence about him, just old soul. It's almost like he's been. walking this earth for 500 years as something else. And, you know, he cares so much, possibly a cat, you know, some sort of feline, definitely. This is his ninth life. Yep. Yeah, right. And, you know, he got kind of a tough, his breakup was really hard to watch.

And I know it was tough on Katie. It was tough on people watching it. Tough on Connor. But the way he responded, it didn't surprise anybody. It was so respectable. I mean, you can tell he's obviously had great parents growing up that have taught him how to, you know, treat a woman and stuff like that. But, you know, it was a tough beat at the end because you can't manufacture a spark. It either exists or it doesn't.

And sometimes that's the hardest part in a relationship is they did nothing wrong at all. But that spark just isn't there. And you feel guilty because you know. know that they're great, but you've got to do what's best of yourself. And if that's not there, there's literally nothing you can do. And so I think that happened to Connor and the fact that, you know, the whole kissing thing, he got some slack for. I know. And then I had to like pour salt in the wound to be like, are you a trash kisser? Yeah, right. Right, right. Are you a piece of shit? I don't know. I don't know. But now I'm thinking maybe.

But when she came out of the audience, it was a perfect time. And I loved it because, you know, it was so spontaneous. And he had this, like, huge smile on his face. And he was like, damn. Like, and right after that happened, I remember, like, raising my hand. I'm like, well, about if I had a kiss or two, who else is going to come down here? Yeah. Why suck you kissing?

I remember you guys all had like, you guys all had like, you guys all had. like your head on a swivel. Like, is someone else coming out for me? Yeah, I know. I know. I do, I do remember this. I don't know if you caught it. But there was a girl in the audience dressed as a cat. I did see that. And so she was clearly there for Connor. And when that girl came out of left field, like I could see her like sharpening her claws. Like she was so pissed. Like she had like He's, like, dead, soulless eyes on and everything. And I'm like, oh, my God. Oh, yeah.

Hey, James. James, come here. You want to say hi? Hi, James. Can you hear me or are you in my in your ears? Here, come here. Hi, buddy. Here, on on.

You want to say hi? Hi. There you are. Oh, hi, sweetie. How are you? I'm good. Oh, you are so adorable. Say hi, Caitlin.

Hi, Caitlin. Hi, I've heard so much about you. You're such a handsome little angel. Thank you. You do. Say, you're pretty, too. You're pretty, too. Oh, my gosh.

Thank you. I would love to have you on as a full guest for an hour if I could. This is the TV stuff. Yeah, and she loves you. She thinks you're really cute and really funny. I do. Yes? Yeah.

You're so sweet. Yeah, he's the bus. All right, I'm, I'm, I'll be off soon. Okay. Go, please. Say bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.

Nice to meet you. I'm new a little bit now. I'm obsessed. Oh, my God. Wait, he's so sweet. Like the greatest. I mean, I'm not, I know everybody thinks their kids the greatest, but they're wrong. Mine is.

And it's just facts. It's just facts. Yeah. Those are straight facts. I believe that. Oh, my God. What is. sweet, sweet, sweet little sweetie.

Yeah, yeah. Now, now you can see why I wanted to come home. I mean, okay, I was going to say I can't even handle being away from my two dogs right now. Like, I cry and, oh, that was something I actually wanted to say. A lot of people wanted to know how you were able to have a phone because everyone knows you can't have a phone on The Bachelor. Do they do that for everyone who has kids? No, no, no. And I didn't have like a phone at my disposal.

Basically, it was, you know, every day, depending on how filming was lining up, I was able to FaceTime. But it was a producer would come in, you know, remove my phone from this envelope. Like, you know, it was guarded. Oh, so it was your phone. It was my phone, yeah. And I got to, I got to FaceTime, but it was actually kind of difficult because, as you know, like, each day is a little bit different. and we're on Eastern time here. And so trying to coordinate time when, you know, James could talk.

And then I would have my phone and, you know, they wouldn't have theirs. So I'd have to text them and be like, you know, can you talk within the next hour? Text me in five minutes and let me know. So there was a lot of coordination going on. But my main question, I think, out of this whole podcast, because I feel like I know you at this point pretty well. I've asked you a lot of questions. were you really conceived in a dune buggy? No.

I was like, is this human? Because I said this to you at Mentot-L-all is that I wish we saw more of your personality because you're so funny and witty and like a jokester. And I love that we saw the more serious and that side. But I knew it when you were like, she kind of just brushed over it too. I was like, wait, I don't know. Like, you know what? I forgot I even said that.

but I usually say things like that when I'm really uncomfortable. So usually stick around and you'll hear just awful things for me. But yeah, I mean, I had so many people back at home be like, you know, every time you're on TV, just America cries. And so like I'm the guy that makes everybody cry. And, you know, that's just a small part of it. And that was also part of the reason why I didn't tell the guys about, you know, my backstory until way later because one it was like you know i wanted to get them to get to know me

as a person prior to because because when people hear this story they change the way they look at you and yeah you know some i didn't want that to happen and i also didn't want to take away from other people's experience before it's time too because you never know how people respond to something like this and they deserve to find their own happiness. I deserve to find mine. And so I was just holding off to wait to things settle. And that was actually difficult to hold on to because it's such a big part of me. But, you know, I'm glad.

I'm glad I waited for that. And they were able to see kind of the funnier, goofier side, which honestly is like 95% of the time. So you also have a sassy side. I just remember this. When I walked into the room once and I was like. I know what you're going to say. I was actually, I was, like, introducing wells or something.

And I was like, there's another guy here. And you're like, we have enough guys here. Yeah, no, no, no. I remember when you walked in, too. I may have been the, the whoa, whoa, challenge or something. You know, when you're sitting on that couch, all you hear is, like, heels clicking. And you're like, oh, God. Yeah.

And you're like, something bad's going to happen. And you come in, and this is right after like, Tasha brought Blake in. So we're like, oh, dear God. what the hell is this and you basically say you know introduce the whoa-well-well but right when you come in you're looking at everyone's face and everyone's like oh shit what like what are you going to say and you said something like god i've never seen a bunch of men so unhappy to see me before and i remember like say i remember saying i doubt that and you're like what yeah you were sorry who the hell's dude like

A couple times, too. I remember being like, oh, my God, Michael A is spicy. Yeah. Oh, for sure. For sure. But, you know, it was just all fun. It's like, you know, you got to fire some cross shots. So when you come in, you know, if you're firing shots, you're going to get some shots fired back. Yeah, you can handle it. You can take me down a couple of notches. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You kept me humble. It was nice. I'm not used to that. No, I'm just kidding. Okay, I have a few listener questions. And I think everyone wants to know this one. Steph Gatone says, are you open to another Bachelor franchise experience in the future, a.k.a. The Bachelor, would you say yes? Nothing's been, like, presented to me.

Yeah. I still honestly am, like, still really, like, heartbroken over Katie. So it's really, like, it's, it's, yeah, it's, it's actually a really difficult thing to think about me, like, transitioning and getting into that. because, you know, filming for that begins sooner than people think. And, you know, I always look back at, like, what Katie was able to do, which was give everybody per fullest attention and give everybody an open shot. And, I mean, to be honest, I'm not saying this.

I know everybody who's asked this question are like, I don't want to answer that right now. Like, contracts are still in the works. Like, that's not where this is at. I'm trying to figure out if this would even be something I want in my life and I could do it justice. And I don't think I can right now. Like I really. That's so fair. Yeah, I really I really don't think I would be able to, even if my son was with me, which would be mandatory. Right. If I, if I were to do it 100%. And I know they've done it for people in the past, but I'm not sure I'd be able to

do it with justice with grace like i don't know what a season with like if i was the lead what that would look like and how different it would be from other seasons because it's a totally different tone it's a different casting process you know like i would go into there just like i did with katy and you know i want to get engaged i know what marriage feels like I know it's great. Yeah. And the worst thing I think I could do is, is rush into that because I'm coming off a high of this season and unfinished work that I'm trying to, I don't know, backfill or do something

to fix how I'm feeling right now. Like I need to, I need to kind of process everything too. God, that's so real. That's so real. I love that. Yeah, like I. You just don't hear many guys say that. Like they'd be like, yeah, I'd be able to be the bachelor.

But you, again, have real feelings that you process and feel and you, I don't know. I obviously people love, so many people are rooting for you and like myself included and want you to find love, of course. But like, we also want you to be ready. And that's a huge important part of being that in that role. You have to be ready. Yes. And I think some of it, my perspective kind of goes back to. the fact that I know

like when I'm doing something it does not just affect me. Which is me going on this show and me pursuing relationships after loss. There's a lot of people that are affected and the same is true with anybody who takes on

this role. I mean sometimes not everything that shimmers is gold, you know? Like you have to be ready for it. You have to understand the implications. You know, the pressure that everybody puts on you the digging people do they they rip apart everything i mean if you're if you're a vowel off sometimes like i mean god forbid you're you're you're done you're you're the

worst um so i don't know crazy everyone thinks i was high on the men tell all because i like didn't have my usual eyeliner that opens my eyes everyone's like she was on something she's heavy like everyone was stoned and i'm like oh my god Like, you can eat, like, you could eat the wrong way and people will criticize you. It's nuts. You know, and it's like to each their own, like, we're out here as people, not like celebrities, not anything like that. Just normal people going through our process. And, you know, if people, people will always criticize.

And I think we all have thick enough skin. I mean, I know you do for sure. but for me like going into this lead as much as I believe in the process which I do because before I didn't but I mean clearly I still have something for Katie so it exists so oh yeah it gets real it gets real and like you said people okay people pick you apart you're also would be going into it like as a perfect human being in people's eyes I okay this next question is from Caitlin Bristow um What are your flaws?

Like, what would you say that you, your flaws are in like, like, are you impatient? Are you like, do you get hangary? Like, tell me bad things about Michael. Yeah. I like, very flawed. I mean, where do you want me to start? I mean, I'm, what people are seeing is that I know how to be a good husband. And I know, I know how to be a good father.

I mean, those are two things. And you're good human to your core. Yeah. And I, and those things I, I stand by, like, character, things I've developed over the years and also put to the test on a regular basis, too. But, like, me as just a standalone human, I'm very stubborn. You have bad morning breath. I know it. Yeah, right.

Yeah, probably. I mean, last night, for example, when we were watching this, I had like 30 people over here. And we were up to, like, three in the morning. So a little, a little too many last night. So definitely this morning, horrible morning breath. I think sometimes I can come off as like I know it all when I feel passionate about something, which I never know it all, but especially after a couple of glasses of wine, I definitely know it all.

Really? That's I kind of the same way. You know who's the same as Jason? He, not even after like a couple of glasses of wine, like he wakes up in the morning and he because he is very smart. So usually he does know it all, but I'm like, well, you don't have to ride. Yeah, right, right. But, you know, you sometimes know it always have to be tested too. And, you know, like, Jason is. He's super smart. Like, his financial and business acumen is, is amazing. Yeah. So, yeah, I mean, tons of flaws for me. I'm just kidding. You don't have to sit here and list out all your flaws. You, no, I was done.

Well, okay. Oh, yeah, just stubborn. Just too. Just stubborn and probably have more bad morning, but only if you drink. the night before that's right okay jess three treats wants to know who are the guys you were closest with on the season oh that's a great question i mean i'll give the political answer which is actually the truth i loved all of these guys and i really mean that i still talk to all of them even night one guys that got sent home wow like i'm i talked to garrett all the time like he went home Week two. I talk to John all the time. Week two. You know, I talk to all of the people who I was in the limo with. It's really interesting because, you know, as this whole thing goes on and the longer you stay, like, your friends that you developed are begin leaving, but then, and you're

sad about that, but then it, like, provides another opportunity to, like, meet somebody else. Like, for example, like Greg and I, we did. didn't really become like even cordial, probably until, you know, that day when I shared the fact that, you know, Laura had passed and he reacted the way he did. He was, you know, we were just kind of doing our own thing. But I would say, like, Justin's my man. I love Andrew S and Andrew M. Both Connors. Trey is awesome. Aaron's awesome. So everyone, that's, you know what?

Mike Gee, I love Mike P. He's like one of the greatest human beings around and like he's an old soul too. So yeah, list goes on. Truly, it was an incredible group of human beings. And I said that throughout the whole time, I was like, I'm confused. Are they all really this great? Like it was a really solid group of guys. And I will say that even just from like standing in the position that I was in and listening

to how the producers spoke about. about everybody. I was like, wow, everybody seems really incredible. I remember, I remember talking with Katie at one of these, uh, rose ceremonies. What are those, are those called cocktail receptions? Cocktail parties. Cocktail parties. I always had our, like, yeah, I don't know if they're called. It's okay. I don't. Okay. Yeah. Cocktail parties. Um, I'm talking with Katie. And then Andrew M comes up and he's like, can I borrow her for a sec? And I, I actually, got kind of like yelled at by producers for this just a little bit because i was like oh yeah for sure dude like come sit down here and i was like i was like katie like for real this guy is amazing

get to know him like quality dude and then they're like like michael could you at least pretend to like be upset at this i'm like yeah you're right i'll try next time you know like i don't know Damn it, Michael. You're so nice. Tessa Matilla wants to know how many Ohio Mamas have slid into the DMs since the show aired. Oh, Ohio Mamas. A lot of Ohio Mamas. You know, I mean, I'm trying to get around to, like, answering all the DMs.

And I, you know, how do you handle this? Like, it's a lot. And, but at the same time, like, some of mine are like really deep been detailed and intimate given the cancer stuff and the parent stuff, I don't know how to like address it without not dedicating like my entire life to it. Well, I know that's where you have to have boundaries, which I find hard to do too because you want to respond to people and you want to like let them know that they didn't just write all that for nothing and that you hear them and you see them. But at the same time, you have to have the boundaries to be like,

well, I can't let this take up the majority of my day. Like, because it takes hours to to get back to a lot of people. I mean, it would take, if I started today, it's taking me weeks to get to it. And you can't, you can't do that. No, no. And, you know, but yeah, I mean, I'm trying to get around to the ones that are, have a lot of substance and the ones that are like, you know, I'll marry you right now. Like, maybe skip those ones. Yeah. Okay. Not going to happen. Yeah, probably not. Okay, we're going to do a confession and then a quick rapid fire game and then I'll let you go to James. Oh my God, he's so cute. I want to like, can I babysit him? Absolutely. 100%. And believe me, I would have been your maid of honor at the Mentel Law too.

I know. They didn't show that. Jason faked me out and said, we're going to get married right there. And then I think I reacted like too positively for them to show it. Because I was like, okay. And he was like, no, that was a prank. And I was like, oh, you would have been my maid of honor. Tayshah was not happy that you would have been my maid of honor. I was like, oh, right. Yeah, you totally would have been too. You said that a little too quick. I did. Michael is my bridesmaid.

Let's do this. Ready to go. That's so funny. Well, now you have to come to the wedding. Cool. Okay, give me your best confession, something embarrassing that you want to get off your chest, that everyone will be like, ew, Michael is gross now. Something that just stands out where you're like, whoa, one time I shit my

pants let's talk oh yeah um let's see here so also if you don't have one that's fine we can skip over it yeah i don't think i have one okay because the next game is the next game is really rapid fire and it's just called more of michael and this confession might come to you here because i feel like you have a hidden wild side that we didn't get to see um you very much filled the dad roll so let's see if we can get any dirt on you with this game okay got it have you ever broken the law yes what did you do you know you smoke weed and yeah east coast east coast west coast a little bit you know um i mean i think i had my i think i had my first beer when i was like 14 oh i was 13 yeah yeah so like crazy early honestly i lived a very fast life early on and then it was like by the time i

got to college i was just exhausted like it's like a lot of times that like people are like oh i'm free like let's go do it i'm like uh been there and done that i'm so tired so yes i've breaking the law i've you know i mean growing up i i used to love riding in cars with my friends and like throwing stuff at mailboxes. Oh, wow. There you go. Okay. Yeah, that's really illegal. And, you know, that's an, it's like an Ohio thing, like in the country, like nothing to do. So I thought that was only out of the movies for the bad boys. Look at you. Well, it's like the indecis and confused, you know, and they throw.

That's what it was. That's what I got the idea. It's like my favorite movie of all time. It's a great movie. It's a great movie. Okay, what is your, like, biggest pet peeve? I don't like when people, like, keep, like, cabinet doors open and don't close them. Okay. You know, like, when you're, like, people don't shut it. I don't, you know, one thing I don't like is, you know, when, like, you have, like, a bag of chips or something or something we can rip it off. I hate when they don't rip the whole thing off and there's just, like, that flap. That is so funny.

that is something that I never even thought about as a pet peeve till you just said that. But when you were describing it, I was like, get rid of the flap. Just you came, you came so far. Don't quit. Don't quit now. And that thing is like always on there and people just have to work around it. Yeah, it's more of an inconvenience. It's awful.

Just take it off, throw it away, like, you know. Yeah, I feel that on a deep level. Okay. Who is your celebrity crush? Katie Thurston. Oh, Michael. You're going to make me crying.

She is celebrity? Yes. Yeah. That's my answer. You kill me. Oh, my God. Why am I rooting for you guys to get back together? Okay.

Enough. Have you ever been caught in the act? No, actually. Not that I recall. I mean, maybe someone did and was just so alarmed. That'd be. They tried to erase it from their memory or something, you know. Like, oh, my God, what is that?

But no, they never brought it to my attention. So, yeah, no. Well, I think we got a little confession out of you that used to smash mailboxes and drink when you were 13. So, okay, that's, that's fair enough. But wait, I can't get, I need to just, oh, my gosh, how can I help you, like, get close? I'm so, that breaks my heart that your celebrity crush is. Katie, like, why do I want you guys to get back together? It's totally okay.

Like, I mean, I don't mean to be putting, like, her on the spot, which you put us on the spot, you know, I know, I know, but like, when I came up there and, you know, you guys were like, so it's been some time, like, you still feel something for Katie. I'm like, yeah, I definitely do, like, you know, and then she comes up and you say the same thing to her and I'm sitting over there like an idiot and she's she's like you know would you leave with Michael today he still confessed his love I'm sitting there like crawling out of my skin like oh my god I can't get out of this chair I don't know how to respond like I know it's not going to be a good answer because there's still two more episodes she can't even say something if she wanted

to and I don't I think if the season was done I'd still get the thank you for your feedback that I got and I'm like, Katie, like, you could have given me a better response than that. I know, I know. She said, thank you for your feedback. Did they cut that out because that was, that killed me. Thank you for, she, but she's like you, in an uncomfortable situation. She tries to use humor. Yes.

And so that's what she was doing. But, oh, my gosh, that's, I mean, do you think you could ever be friends with her eventually? Oh, 100%. 100%. Yeah. Like, I can't be friends with. people that I used to like be in love with yes I would have no problem doing that and that's that's where we're at so it's like you'd rather have some some relationship than none and there's there's something

like remarkable with her that you know I'd like to see in my life in any like capacity you know she really she was really obviously a huge part of you know of everything you've been through and be able to feel a spark again and just the kind of person she is and the way you speak about or the way she speaks about you, I could definitely see a friendship. So that's really special. Without a doubt. Yeah. Yeah. She's going to be, she's going to have a really happy life. And I'm actually really happy that this is finally winding up for her because I know how stressful and everything this has been. And I think it's super stressful on her because she takes it seriously.

Yeah. You know, I think that's what I told her too. When she was on the bathroom floor, I was like, this shows me that you were putting your whole heart into it, that you are doing this right, that you are like really feeling everything because this is how a lot of us felt in this moment. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And she cares about people's emotions and that takes a piece of you each time, whereas I think some people can just turn it on and off.

So I'm happy she's towards the end of this. whole thing. Yeah, she's, she's ready. So thank you for taking a little more than an hour of your time this morning to talk to me and to just always, you're always just so open and funny and vulnerable and just everything we would want in a, you know, a contestant. I don't like calling you that. You know, but somebody, we're watching people date on the show and it just felt really real with you. And I always love to see that on the show because I think it's, It's just the most important thing to do when you're trying to find love is be completely authentic in yourself and open. And you did all of that.

And I just thank you for everything. And we'll put a link to your nonprofit. Thank you. And thanks for sharing it yesterday, too. Yeah, of course. Really appreciated that. Oh, my gosh. That is one of my favorite things in the world to use my platform for us to like for important things.

And that's obviously important. And you're a friend now. you're going to be in my wedding party. So I won't let, yeah, I won't let you down, I promise. You know, I won't like be the one that's complaining about the dress you pick. I'll just, you know, that'll be my opportunity to go full drag. We'll be at your, at your wedding. I have the person for you to do your makeup and everything and we'll pick you a really nice dress.

I know you won't complain about it. So thank you. And now, now, that you're off the show, we can be Instagram friends now. Oh, awesome. About time you accepted me back. I'm like, hey, you know what? Actually, I don't even know how to tell who's following you. Like, I'm not good at like the filter thing or I don't know how this is happening. Of course you're not because you're, we love this about you. You know what? Don't change Michael. And I'm always going to call you Michael A. So thank you Michael A for blessing our TV.

screens with your presence and for blessing this podcast with with your humor and your voice and everything i'll i'll stop pumping your tires now i'm like that's enough kael no you can keep going keep going there's more nope nope i'm done go go brush your teeth go brush your teeth okay thank you so much i'm kately bristow your session is now ending thanks for listening to off the vine Grape Serapy. Tune in to hear new minisodes every Thursday and check out new full-length episodes every Tuesday exclusively on Podcast1.com,

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