Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Grape Therapy: Dara Hart

Episode Date: December 27, 2018

This week Kaitlyn speaks with powerhouse personal trainer Dara Hart about self confidence, self care, and living intentionally in 2019. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Podcast One presents Off the Vine, Grape Therapy. Caitlin Bristow's going to answer your questions. Drink to your confessions and hear what you have to say about anything Bachelor. Let's shake it up some more. Here's Caitlin. Welcome to Grape Therapy. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. Today we're in my girlfriend's very small.

apartment in new york it's very classic new york it's i was going to try and paint a picture but that'll probably bore people it's cute it's a shoebox and it's very cute and we're in new york and i'm with dara hart who you have you're a woman of many talents you have a lot going on which we say is a great thing like i'm like i don't know where to start you're a celebrity fitness trainer you're we're on broadway you're oh i should probably turn my see i'm a professional You're a wellness coach, an artist, a pioneer. You've got a lot going. Does that sound good?

Doesn't that sound good when I introduce you? You've just got all these things going on. But you train me every time I come to New York. Yes. And you, I love your approach to fitness because it's very different and unique. And we'll get into that. But today's grape therapy is going to be kind of about body image, wellness, health. And then you describe the other stuff.

you are i always called i always called dara a little buddha you're a little buddha and i just you're so wise and i want you to talk to me about everything i i i'm so so so so excited to be yeah to be with you i love i love it too because you're so wise thank you our training sessions always end up like a therapy session every time you're now you're going to have to talk right into the microphone oh it's all right yeah okay hi everyone you're going to have to love you're going to love Love the sound of your own voice like I do. Hello. Hello.

Yeah. Turn it on. Turn it on. And it's another, wait, did I say grape therapy or off the vine? I said grape therapy. That's okay. Hey, you know what? This is where are my heads at today.

Let's be real. I had a sick week. I was off for a full week. I had to do a repeat on my last podcast, but I did one of my favorites was from Raw Beauty Talks, which I was talking to you about earlier. And then on my grape therapy, I had two friends takeover. So this is my first time back. I'm a little, I'm a little shaky.

I'm a little rough around the edges today. You also just worked out so maybe you're a little shaky from. And I also went out last night. And so the, what I have going on here is not wine. I've got Bailey's and coffee. I like to call that a day changer. But anyways, yes. Okay, whatever this is, off the vine, grape therapy, whatever it is, talk to me, Dara.

We don't need to define it. We don't need to define it. We really don't. And Rachel's in the background, just cleaning away over there. Nice. Anyways, okay, let's jump into this. You work with Victoria's Secret models. Yes.

You train them. Yes. Yeah. And we were talking about this on our drive here, just the movement with Victoria's Secret and how it's kind of a dying breed. But I was thinking, like, training them all the time. You go traveling with them. You train them for shows.

Is it hard to maintain a healthy mindset for a healthy body image? while doing that. I would find myself, you know when you scroll on Instagram and you compare and you compare and you are constantly like doing the whole like what we all do on Instagram, do you find that you have to work hard

at not doing that while being around Victoria Secret Models? Because I mean, they're just a rare breed. I mean, they're beautiful women. Beautiful. They're hardworking. They're athletes. Yeah.

You know, I want to talk for a second about Instagram. Yeah, please. I think it's insane and amazing at the same time. Exactly. The crazy thing about Instagram is you're scrolling between your reality of like, oh, your sister and your nieces and your best friend and what they're cooking with, with the juxtaposition of like your idols.

So it's like this, right. It's like a major complex and complicated relationship that you have with your phone. And I really think. think that the strength comes from working on working on yourself working on your own self-confidence and your own your own strength within yourself yeah anyways when we're talking about Victoria Secret we're talking about Victoria's Secret models and how I you know yeah I it's it comes from working on on myself it comes from dedicating time for myself dedicating physical time to move and dedicating time to reflect and also create and when that

happens the rest of my day the rest of my life no matter who I interact with is beautiful but it's but it's got to be challenging oh yeah it's crazy because you know you look well you know these women are exceptional women hardworking they're extremely fit but the challenge is I mean I'm five two and I have an athletic body like my legs are thick and strong yeah I don't look like a Victoria's figure model and yet I ended up in a situation training a lot of them all I think I think how many of them do trade well well you know I'm one of the founding trainers of dog pound and yeah and Kirk the owner of dog pound you know he deals with A lot of the high level clients, as do I, we work together.

And I think even last year, we ended up training almost every single Victoria Secret Model that was walking, apart from the ones that were pregnant or just not in the show that year. So we ended up, you know, training a lot of them. I was like, we became like this like assembly line of like supermodel trainers. Wow. Did you do that at the dog pound? Yeah. Yeah, so a lot of the, a lot of the women come to train in the gym, and then for a few years, I went on the road with them.

So for Fashion Week in Paris or to prep them for major campaigns, I often will travel with clients. And, you know, I lived in, in Adrian Lima's house. Well, really? Yeah, in the Hamptons. And we did daytime workouts and evening meditations. She's amazing. She's, she's, yeah, she's. really got it figured out.

Really? Did she really? Yeah. Yeah. And it's beautiful to see, you know, someone's so hardworking physically and also hardworking on the inner world and the inner life. Yeah. She's an amazing mother and she's a true athlete. But, you know, these women, it is, it's, the crazy thing to think about is the way that, how do I say this? It's the, it's like it's like it's insane it's like one I'm five two I'm literally like a ball of muscle and I'm building these bodies that are completely unattainable right um it's one it's essentially one body type that's projected from this brand is what's beautiful right right right and that's what I wanted to kind of talk about too is that Victoria's Secret is that

why you think like maybe it's changing it's, do you think it's going to change its direction or do you think it has to or do you think it's going to go away? It's, it's so tricky, you know, I'm not really sure, but I mean, if it, look, like, we're, we're, we're getting smarter and we're getting stronger as women too. Yeah. You know, we're realizing, we're realizing that we're in control of our life and we're in control of our experience, not in control, but that we are curating it. And what, what is sexy? Yeah.

What is, what is sexy? How can I experience that for myself? I don't know if it's really going to last, if they're going to go this way. This way. Well, because the brand is supposed to be, you were saying, a fantasy. And I don't think maybe I, I didn't even think about that while, like, well, watching, I don't usually watch the shows, but like, seeing Victoria's Secret Models or see, like, I don't, I, I haven't been able to separate it and be like, oh, that's supposed to be like a fantasy thing. But why is that the fantasy? Why is that, like, and what is sexy?

What is sexy to you? You know what? Rachel and I went to a, what do you call that? like a seminar with a relationship expert who I'm also going to be podcasting with and she said they said

boundaries are sexy and I loved that boundaries are sexy but yeah what is it's like unattainable beauty I mean it's like it's like it's like it's like get so skinny and to the point where

you don't even have a voice anymore I mean like that's what they're saying but that's not I'm not saying that's what they're saying but that's not sexy anymore no sexy is self-confidence strength yeah that's sexy and that's if if you ask anyone I think men or women what's sexy I think people would say confidence but how do you work I just think you're such a good person to talk to you about how to get there and what you can do for self-love and and to practice that and to some like tips and tricks to to be mindful because you will you give me good meditations to do and so I'm like what can people do to work on their self-confidence oh yeah I love that yeah that's that's something

I'd love to talk about because you know I suffered I suffered I suffered from an eating disorder for for quite a long time coming from that that lack of self-confidence and insecurity comparing myself to others and it's beautiful because I think that the way that my life has has turned out as like a it's like a test like training these amazing a wonderful beautiful beautiful women that are leading the fashion industry and leading leaders industry leaders and professionals and the most beautiful people in the world it's like it's like a test it's like how can I maintain my self-confidence how can I maintain myself strength so that I can help these people and I can help as many people as possible feel that way isn't it while that the life

works that way where you can now work with these Victoria Secret models and use it as a life lesson and learn from it and practice your self-confidence. Like that's your job now. That's crazy that you came from that, you know? And you struggled with something and now you're in a position where you are working with unattainable body types and you are so strong and you practice your confidence. Yeah, I think it's self, you know, at least it's coming from where. Working with my self-confidence is a daily, is a daily practice.

It's hourly for me. Yeah. Because, it's important to say that. Yeah. It's, it's showing up for yourself every single day and it's showing up yourself first. Yes. That's the main, that's the main thing I've learned this year specifically. I mean, this year's been wild.

And I don't know about you, but this year's been a real wild. It's been a weird, wild. Like, 2018 chewed me up and spat me out. Yeah. And I, and I'm like, in good ways and in bad ways. Like, I went through heartbreak. I went through big life changes. I went through, like, starting businesses.

I went through struggles. Like, and now I'm like, okay, 2019, I'm very excited about. But I think 2018 was a weird year for everyone. But I also remember people saying this in 2017. Like, I feel like this is just an ongoing, like, like, and I'm like, I'm hoping we're not like, nope, 2020. That's the year. Like I'm really, I just feel like there's, I love that you can just hear the New York sirens in the background. I know, it's the, it's the New York symphony.

I think, yeah, I think there is going to be a shift. But that is, I wanted to say this. When people reach out to me through like direct messages or Instagram or whatever, they always say, how are you so confident and like, how do you stay so strong? And like, you're going through a breakup or even just like in my daily, but I'm like, that's a challenge. Like, it's some days easier than others, but hourly I do have to show up for myself. and there are times where I'll have like a rough self-confidence day and I'll just feel like absolute garbage and I'll look in the mirror and I'll start picking myself apart

and I'll do certain things but people don't see that because they you know so I'm like well don't don't just think that's don't have that unrealistic expectation that you should just go through life being confident all the time and happy because that's not real but that's what you see on Instagram so that's always what you see on Instagram and then I get in trouble you know I get people reaching out if I'm crying on Instagram they're like maybe keep that to yourself and I'm like no I'm like I want to be real with the people that follow me I want to cry I want to share my hard days I want to share my hard times I what's wrong with what's wrong with crying nothing we should be embracing that I cry a lot

actually I cry too yeah I love crying I love a good cry yeah you know a good tip if you feel like you're becoming emotional yeah and you would rather not cry you just grab some water drink water what really yeah try it really just keep water by you stay hydrated but also that's gonna be if you're in it if you're in an important meeting yeah or if you're you know if you're if you're hoping to just maintain a space of stability where you're you're not you don't want to cry yeah drink water just take water and and sip on some water it'll completely soothe that okay you can be a witness here yeah I never drink water.

All of a sudden, I got like the biggest bottle of H2O around me at all times. But you can, you know, I love to cry. I do too. I love it. It's a release. You know, my mantra right now, like what I've been saying to myself, my whole life is like, oh, you're too sensitive. You're too sensitive. I've been saying my sensitivity is my strength.

Yeah. I saw that on your Instagram and I loved that. Yeah, something I've been telling myself. And I've been also saying that this coming year is going to be the year of my self-victory, myself myself yeah it's expansion

myself yeah and it's continuing to work on myself and that's also getting back to confidence

working on my confidence comes from prioritizing myself we are always concerned about performing and delivering and being for others

and I also think that you know that's how a lot of companies monetize yeah and teach us that we need to

buy something we need to be something we need to look a certain way we need to act a certain way in order to be happy and to feel good about who we are whereas feeling good about who you are comes from prioritizing who you are and comes from what work you're doing on yourself and how you're then giving back to others right and that all and that looks different for everyone yeah like i think we see these images on social media of what looks to be perfect and some people are like oh you're traveling everywhere you've always got cute clothes and I'm like but does that make you happy like what does that mean for you to live your best life yeah that maybe you don't love traveling like maybe and but you see it on Instagram you're like maybe I should be traveling like you have to

really think about like compartmentalize like what what you actually feel and what you think you should feel through social media has anyone else out there been waiting for a show to come along about being in your early 20s that's actually like being in your early 20s. I am so here for Freeform's new series called Good Trouble because it nails being 20-ish. It's from the creators of also amazing series The Foster's so you know it's going to be good. It's gritty. It's grounded. It's sexy. The two main characters, Callie and Mariana Adams Foster, moved to L.A. after finishing college and law school and have their dreams shaken by a cold, hard dose of reality, like having your U-Haul and all your belongings

stolen kind of reality. Not to mention starting their first jobs and realizing nothing is what they expect it. I'm sure we can all relate to that one. Series premieres Tuesday, January 8th at 8 p.m. Don't miss it. I feel like you had a moment of realization over there and I missed it. Oh, me? Yeah. I feel like every moment is the moment of realization in my life. I'm literally like every moment. I'm like, yeah, you take. I know, you, but that's what I love about it. I can see it. Like, you just take things in and you like, I feel like you're always learning. I know. Rachel keeps scooting closer to be in the, I really do wish you had a microphone, Rachel. So, okay, breaking down how to, how do you connect with yourself?

Yeah. How do you prioritize yourself over others? I mean, I have so many people that reach out to me and they ask me, you know, advice on how to get in shape or I just don't know where to start or I just, I just can't seem to show up and actually do it, staying committed. So I broke down how I work in five steps. Yeah. Okay, we'll talk about that for a second. I'd love to.

So at least from my experience and from my life, moving is so important. And, you know, for so long I worked out so hard and I pushed my body so hard. so I would look a certain way. And I remember, you know, I got to a point where I was maybe 15 pounds lighter than I am now, like really skinny. And I remember feeling, looking back in that moment, I remember feeling like so disgusting, so heavy, so big, so thick. and now I'm like looking at pictures and I'm comparing I'm like wow I feel so amazing so much better now being bigger physically

but I think it came from a place of listening and practicing presence in myself as opposed to attacking my body and hurting my body and pushing my body and forcing my body so I would look a certain way as opposed to just being in my body being embodied being in my body

being in my body and just being yeah so movement so through movement i say through movement that's the first step movement whether that's fitness whether that's yoga whether that's just simple i don't know going for a walk through movement you experience your world so move your body right then presence so presence is a tricky one because i'm like be present be present yeah i would love to talk about being present okay be present i'll teach you to be present okay that's why i love Podcasting. Okay, just a second. Take it, just a second.

Okay. So, close your eyes. Okay. Inhale deeply. Hold your breath. Suspend your breath. And exhale completely. That's what I'm going to do.

Whoa, everybody should just stop and do that. I felt good. Yes. Everyone should stop and take a deep breath. At any moment, if you're feeling overwhelmed or you're feeling overwhelmed or you're feeling confused or you're feeling hurried or you're feeling stressed that is the first thing that you can do you just stop you take a breath you hold it and then you let it go yeah like that i feel actually i wasn't even like wound up there i wasn't even wound up and i all of a sudden i just feel

like so much more calm like being present is actually so hard why is it so hard for us to do that everybody is just on the go because everybody's on their phone yeah that's something i always say that I love about podcasting, I'm like, we are not on our phones, we're having conversation, we're making eye contact, and we're not distracted. We're actually just having 45 minutes of a conversation, and you don't do that a lot. When, like, when do you ever do that? Like, podcasting is beautiful for that because, and then I think people, when they listen to podcasts, I mean, some people do it while they're cleaning or it's a distraction or whatever, but I feel like it's just like, it, I think that's why podcasting is such a thing right now is because it

allows people to feel like they're present in a conversation. And you don't get that very often. Yeah. That's, oh, I just had a moment there. Actually, actually listening. Yeah. I love that.

Yeah. Yeah. I love it. I just love it. I love it. I have a teacher who said this. She said, don't you love it when you can sit and talk to someone and actually look in their eyes and ask

them how they're doing and be with them and really listen. Listen, one of my major pet peeves is, I don't know if it's outside of New York, but in New York City, it's like this, like this New York City greet is like, hi, how are you? Hi, how are you? And they're like, how are you? How, hi, how are you? And they're like, they're in the middle of like, like, they're literally asking me how I'm doing as they're walking away from me. I'm literally like. They don't care how you're doing.

Like, what are you asking me how I'm doing if you actually aren't engaging? Like, and there are times where I will literally. I'll literally be like, how, how are you? Yeah. And it's like that sting and that it freaks them out. Like to actually look at someone in the eyes and say how you're, yeah. And be with them in that moment and ask them how they're doing and really actually be present to listen. Yeah.

And to hear that. Yeah. We should give people homework to do that. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't know that people just ask that, but they don't actually want an answer. Right. It's just like a high.

I know. I had a friend say, yeah. And I had a friend say like, oh, they're just asking hi. It's like, I don't know. Okay. Well, if they're asking hi, just say hi. Just say hi. Hello. Have a great day. And move on with your life. Isn't that such a wild concept, though, like to think of somebody saying hi and just to like have a good day or actually be in the moment and asking you how you are? Being in that moment and actually taking a breath and looking at someone and listening with them and just being with them could completely change their whole reality. It could change their day. Yeah. So, okay, so there's movement presence and then balance. That's my favorite. I've talked about this on the podcast before. I'm, okay, I love that you say this is your favorite one because I would love to know what balance means. Like, to me, balance is drinking a lot of wine one night and then working out the next day and eating a salad.

And then the next day having McDonald's and then the next day, that's balanced to me. But balance might mean something different to you. Well, that sounds a little bit like a dance between the. Is that extreme? Yeah, it sounds like, but that's okay. If that's how you can find a way to then, be introspective in your choices yeah so balance is shifting and adjusting balance we're always moving the the world is always moving every cell in our body is always moving

every everything in in the in the universe is always moving yeah so being balance is never going to be like oh I made it like I'm I'm balanced it's shifting it's adjusting it's adjusting it's learning to self-calibrate yeah so when when you're thirsty you drink water i mean it's like literally taking the tools when you're feeling a little bit anxious or overwhelmed it's knowing having the knowledge and the tools to apply so that you can stay grounded and stable and centered no matter what happens in your day in your life so when we move our body we experience ourselves when we are more present within our body within our breath connecting with our breath we can be in the moment and when we are in that moment then we can make choices that

help us balance or become more balanced or be in balance that's what see I told you guys she's wise so there's movement presence balance and then in that space your choices change right so if you really take that second i mean literally like what 10 seconds to take a deep breath yeah asking yourself okay i'm hungry and then deciding what food food to nourish yourself yeah you can listen to yourself that way you can listen to your body yeah first of all listen to your body i freaking hate it when people say that it's like okay i almost did you just listen to your body like it's like well how do I listen to my body right what does that mean well look my body is telling me like I want to drink only coffee that's all like you know I mean like that's not that's

moving your body feeling your body feeling where where your body's tight like doing the work on your body each week to show up for your body to take care of your body to build strength for your body taking that time in presence to connect with your breath to learn simple meditations or breath exercises to help self-soothe or help build more confidence, help aid in your digestion, whatever it is, becoming more aware so that when you make your choices for yourself, they can be more balanced choices for you. Does that make sense? So much so. And then from there we create, right? So from there, create, that's the fourth one, creation, create, we're creative beings. Like, I'm an artist, I'm a singer, but outside of like, for me,

how I connect with that creativity we are creative we create life we're creative we create actions we create thoughts and words we're creative we're creative beings so you know whether it's creating a new product or creating a new idea it's creating your action creating your words creating your words what you say what you speak how you move through your life that's a that's an act of creation you know taking time to like we talked about like writing down writing down three things that you're grateful for each day like creating creating new ideas like taking time to taking time to just reflect and then write on it because i feel like everybody is looking for that thing that's going to like like

yeah something's going to shift instant yeah instantly like okay now i'm confident now i'm happy and i think people need to realize it's just an ongoing project your whole life of of reflection and self-love and I think that these steps are very important because I really believe in everything that you're saying like people don't aren't willing to do the homework and they aren't willing to do what they need to work on to get there every day and show up for themselves yeah it's like look if I could tell you like okay all you need to do is take this one vitamin right or all you to do is buy this one outfit or do this one thing you know that's a great way to you know get a quick fix or make a buck you know but it is an ongoing process it is it's every day it's it's every day

you're in your body every day yeah this is what you got yeah and then no turning back yeah and then and then what are you you know when you can do those four things for yourself those are a fifth one the fifth one is sharing oh is sharing yeah So, so how do you, so, you know, how do you relate to that? Is it sharing, sharing your ideas? Is it sharing a meal? Is it sharing in a philanthropic endeavor? Is it sharing on social media?

Right. Imagine if everyone took, took a few moments to do the work before they blasted out on social media. Yeah. Social media would become like a source of. inspiration and and and and beauty as opposed to a highlight reel yeah yeah that's interesting that's what I love

you know I work with you know we talk about my clients like oh some clients that are social you know that are supermodel but there are beautiful clients too that I have you know that use their reach and use their platform and as a as a way to help shift and and and move move the collective consciousness to a space of beauty and service. I'm sorry, I sound a little wild. I'm just saying using, let me tell you.

I told you I could listen to you talk all day. Like, be a model, be a role model. Like, I love that, like use social media as a way to serve. Yeah. Yeah. I try and have that mindset. And sometimes I do get caught up in, like, having the cute photos. But I really do.

My Instagram stories and stuff, I'm very, like, sometimes too. real but but but no it's great but i like doing that it's great i like that and you should who say like what are you saying like you can't look cute no i can like in order to be like to be real like you have to like literally like not wear any makeup right like what i don't even know you can do that yeah and i do and i will continue to but you're just your just who you are is inspiring you know And you, you like how you connect with, how you connect with the people that engage with you, you know, is inspiring. Like, you, you're leading by an example. I like that.

Thank you for saying that. Well, we're all, we're all inspirational in our own ways. Ladies and Jens, the college football playoff semifinals are just around the corner. The Saturday, December 29th, both games will be back to back on ESPN. First up at 4 p.m., Eastern Clemson will face Notre Dame in the Goodyear Cotton Bowl classic. These two historic programs last played each other in 2015, with Clemson surviving with a two-point victory, and this year's match-up looks to be even more exciting. Next up, we have Alabama and Oklahoma playing in the Capital One Orange Bowl at 8 p.m. Eastern Time.

Alabama continues its success under coach Nick Sabin, entering the game ranked first overall, but not so fast, because the Sooners have won their last three games against the Crimson Tide. When it's all over Saturday, the winner of these two games will face each other in the National Championship game presented by AT&T on Monday, January 7th, only on ESPN. We'll be right back with more Austin Vine, Grape Therapy. Alexa isn't the only one with breaking news. Make sure to hang around at the end of this podcast for the latest breaking headlines on the AP News Minute.

Happy holidays from all your friends at Podcast One. Hey, it's Adam Carolla. This is Heather Dubrow from Heather DeBrow's world. Hey, Steve Off from the Steve Off show. Hey, this is Rob Wrigal. and Sarah Tiana from Riggles Picks. This is Caitlin Bristow from Off the Vine. Hey, this is Kelty from The Lady Gang.

Happy Holidays from Podcast One. You're listening to Off the Vine Race Therapy. Who are your top three people that you would recommend following on Instagram to be inspired by instead of, you know, like going to follow that next person that's cute on Instagram, who, or even just one, somebody that comes to mind that is so inspirational that you follow on Instagram. mine is the raw beauty is raw beauty talks and also who else do I follow that um think grow prosper is a good one um what yeah I don't know does someone come to my for you I don't know I it's so hard for me to choose one okay tell me five tell me 10 well look I first of all I love like I love Ashley Graham oh I love Ashley Graham yes I do too she's phenomenal she just seems like such a badass too I love her

I drink her You're allowed to say that No I love her so much She is She's like Literally like Of a fucking role model Yeah you totally

She's changing the whole Game Yeah I love her She's beautiful too I love her I love her I love her And I love everything she does

Yeah You know she's really She's really inspiring just through just every action she makes every everything she does i love that yeah see that's i do follow her actually on instagram too i'm trying to think of what else we had to talk about because i'm like god i could this is it's already 31 minutes and i'm like no i want to talk to you for like even the way you speak it's soothing it is it's like there's something you're just you don't overthink things like you just you just say and you'll even take a moment to like think about what how to

say it and it's so like real i don't know i just really i just really um really appreciate your conversation is what i'm trying to say um i wanted to talk about the numerology that we were doing the other day oh because that is nuts like it is nuts to me that you can do this what is it called um it's called tantric numeric numerals Tantric numeralogy. Yeah. It sounds really sexy when you say it like that, but it's, yeah. with my like sexy like sick Phoebe voice actually I'm sounding pretty good um but it so the other day we did a workout and what I love about working out with you is that we always seem to have a good conversation during it and I'm like wow you just kicked my ass and I didn't even realize it because

we were having such good conversation but you were talking about um we were talking about just relationships and um how we are in relationships and where it comes from and just who we are are as like human beings and why and you were like what's your birthday and i literally told you my birthday and you had me so dialed in like you knew my soul and like what my purpose in life was and what my struggles were all from my birthday it was wild and then i gave you somebody else's birthday and i didn't say who i just gave you someone and you had them figured out and it blows Yeah, and you did, you did Rachel's, and it just blows my mind because, how do you explain it? So this is a tool.

It's a tool for self-reflection and introspection. And I study, I study Kundalini Yoga. Yeah. And I have amazing teachers that have taught me so many wonderful tools and techniques that I can use to reflect and also help others. Yeah. Like, you helped me in a. an hour we just laid on the floor of the dog pound do you hate when people say the dog pound or is it the dog pound is it just dog pound i think it's dog pound i'm not even it's dog pound it's like dog pound

it's like Nike yeah it's like dog pound it's a brand for sure it's a great business too great great great great gym highly recommend it anyways we laid on the floor we laid on the floor and just talked about these numbers for a whole hour i just interrupted you go ahead no no yeah yeah but but it's it blows my my mind because so let's I don't care people I'm an open book I want people to know me right to the core so let's oh do you need a Kleenex because I got a lot I'm like I'll take this opportunity to cough um let's dive into mine we'll try and do it somewhat quickly so I because my birthday is June 19th 1985 you take six the the month no you explain it I'm going to sound like an idiot So, yeah, so we, within this, within this style of numerology, we, we work with, um, 11 numbers.

Yes. And each number has a different energy. Yes. So maybe the, what's my, explain my numbers. Oh, okay. Wait, sorry, no, you were still going. No, so each number has. Yeah, has a different energy.

Yeah. And, um, maybe we could talk through even the, the month. Right, you know, and the energies of each month that we're born in, so maybe others can feel connected, or the days. So the day that you're born, they teaches the soul number. So in these teachings, the soul is come, is the undying essence that moves through lifetime after lifetime body after body to experience itself. and so the day that you're born is is essentially the day of the calling of your soul so what you've come to to do um in this life yes and the month that you're born is the is the is the karmic position which is the homework i like to say because karma is like i don't know has such

so much heaviness and weight to it and homework is just something that is something a little lives of practice so what you work on each day what you continue to work on and you'll have to work on forever yes as long as you live in this body right is is a karmic position so the the day that you're born in the month right and then we work with 11 numbers so there's energetics behind each each number from one one to 11 and um in these teachings we teach that there's 10 bodies so there's um each body that we have you don't have just one each body that you have

contains energies and negative and positive energies and within them so crazy okay so I wish we oh I love talking about this stuff though

that's okay we have some time I could talk through the 10 bodies yeah so the first body is the soul body I'm getting comfortable over here the soul body

the soul body yeah and um yeah that's the initiate initiatory number um oh what if i talk through them and we can talk through the positive and negatives of each number okay i'm so i'm so interested in the stuff i love it yeah i love it because when you were explaining my numbers it was like you you said what i was like put on this earth to do it's so intense i'm so intense no i'm really like No. I love, you know how much I love this. You can hear it in my voice. I get very passionate and into it. But you told me what my homework was. What my soul has come here to do. What I need out of a partner. My gift. And what was the other one? Your knowledge. And my knowledge. And then your path. And then my path. So the path is like the roadmap. It's like the, it's like the GPS. It's like the, it's like the map. Right. Like, oh. Like. Like. turn right yeah it's it's not for every every instance but it's it's a great way to look look at your choices and make sure that it's aligned aligning yes your purpose yeah going backwards going the wrong way yeah right right and that and that's get back on track because you know too in your life

when you're not on the right track like you know this this past like obviously I don't know how long now like six months I feel like I was not on the right track like I wasn't myself I wasn't I just I felt like I was on the wrong path yeah well which I clearly was but like I could feel it like it just felt off to me but explain the numbers to me oh yeah okay wonderful okay so the first is the soul and that's the beginning

that's your independence your ability to start things it's how you communicate through your soul level so number one you your soul beginning, starting, initiating. The second is the negative mind. So in these teachings, they teach that we have a positive mind, a negative mind, and a neutral mind.

Okay. So the negative mind is the number two, and it's not necessarily what you think it is. Oh, yeah. I'm thinking, like, when I look in the mirror and I tell myself I'm getting old, that's not my negative though it's a survival instinct okay it's instinctual mind it's um it's how you can analyze danger it's like the first filter it's it's so important for us as animals as human beings to have right so that's the negative mind okay it's like your security guards your bouncer it's how you analyze risk it's about relationships one and two it's about two you and others um number three is

a positive mind and I like to think of it as like a expansive so as opposed to like just be positive say yes like yeah I feel like Americans are like stay positive yeah be positive yeah but being positive being positive like a plus sign is like adding expanding right so um it's expansive um agreeable and and about growth um it's tricky because the positive can can be applied to beautiful amazing wonderful situations and also negative energies as well so the growth of your yes like from learning from like a relationship right is that what you're thinking i'm thinking like you know it says yes to everything so if you're if you're if you're if you're around if you're around something that's not as helpful for you or healthy and you're saying it's

like it's like like a number three is like yes yes yes yes but what if what if like you're saying yes to no no no no no it just expands and gets bigger am i making sense kind of you lost me a little there okay so so it's it's hot it's a hot and fiery number and it says yes to everything including negative it agrees with everything okay right so if you're expanding on a negative situation or thought that is also an expression of the number three okay I get what you're saying now yes you've got me back yeah yeah then four is a neutral mind so four is is a space in which we should take action and make decisions or at least try to yeah is within that neutral mind is how you apply an intelligent decision so at first the mind goes through the

negative filter then there's the positive and then there's the neutral which is the space in between which is the balance. Okay. And, you know, to make and take action within that space, it requires at least nine seconds. It needs strong breath. Okay.

Nine seconds. Yeah, that's as much time as it should take in a healthy mind to apply an intelligent decision. Wow. Okay. That's interesting. If it's out of balance,

it becomes box like structured two structured stuck number four is the energy of like a piece the neutral mind yeah is the energy of like the peacekeeper

right the balance then we have five so we have we have the soul we have the three minds then we have five which is the physical body which is my favorite that would be your favorite it's a balance between the earth

and the energies outside of the angelic I guess it's your connective network it's how you experience a world it's in your body it's your bones

it's your muscles it's also your connection with others your connectivity and five is a teacher so yeah it's a teacher then there's six

which is your arc line which is your ability to repel negative influences and manifest and it's the ability to behave lovingly and kind it's a sense of justice and as a mediator is

is the arc line and it's like your halo it's like it's like it lives from ear to ear and for women nipple to nipple so it's like that ability to be mothering and kind fair and peaceful that's the number six

you have a lot of six I have a lot of six you do which is now even more crazy that you say that because I feel like I was put on this earth to be a mother I was I feel like I'm supposed to be a mom yeah you can be a mother in many ways outside of having children

that's true yeah my brain doesn't go that deep ever so thank you for opening my eyes to that then seven is aura yeah it's your like electromagnetic field do you feel that from people like are you are you a kind of person that can feel people's energy so i have a lot of seven i feel everything yeah i literally feel oh you can see i i i feel that from you i i literally can walk in a room and i'm like this person's upset this person's happy this

i'm a i'm i'm really really sensitive yeah so yeah the aura is is a electromagnet it's the frequency see. It's the sound, sound current. It's the scientist. It's about self-care. It's the voice. Everything is making sound. Everything's moving. Everything's a sound current, right? So it's your vibe. It's your vibe. That's a vibe. Eight is a pranic body, soprana, breath, inhalation, exhalation. And you can even look at the number eight and you can see the energy of that. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale, that infinite. infinity number yeah that infinity symbol yeah is that is like a lesson in itself the breath of life the ability to inhale and exhale to give and receive so eight the pronic body uh the breath the power eight likes money and power oh i'll ask you this question and and the inhalation the exhalation and that ability to take a deep breath and from that breath you can speak your truth from that breath you can build your confidence your sense of leadership so eight is a leader

eight is an entrepreneur eight has power eight likes wealth and money fearlessness and this isn't like the enneagram where people are like oh what number am i and you're just one number you're all these numbers yeah right exactly nine is a subtle body which i love as well is that ability to sense and feel without needing anything but a look or a touch it's that ability to read between the lines and know without knowing

grace sophistication, refined soft spoken you know those people that you know that you just look the one look you they just know you don't need to explain yeah they just get it

that's a subtle body yeah that's subtlety yeah 10 is also i love all these numbers but 10 is is the radiant body so that courage that heart magnetism that leadership ability that warrior for peace all or nothing like those people you know qualities and people that would just do die for die for the cause like would do anything for the ones that they love would stand up for what is right i always see like you know You know, this image of like a warrior with an army behind them, like that one at the front leading the pack, that leadership quality and ability for peace, for love, for helping serve others, for helping uplift others, that ability to be a leader for the heart of the heart.

And then 11. 11. People can't see me, but I'm just sitting here like smiling, not in my head, yes. 11 is the master number. It's mastery of all the 10 bodies. 11 is spiritual excellence. And it's tricky because the, if you even look at, you look at the number 11, right? It wants to cling.

It's my favorite number. Oh, you love it? Yeah, it is. 11's my number so the space between the numbers is is is where we live is within that space right is where we aim to live and the when it's out of balance it wants to cling it wants to it wants to feel connected to something whether it's my things my stuff yeah or another person like like you complete me how many times have you heard that yeah and why you're my soulmate yeah guess what you are your own soulmate yes I love that you are your own soulmate if you take

anything away from this podcast today is that you are your own soulmate you don't need somebody to complete you are complete you are having somebody is a bonus having somebody is a bonus yeah and and is amazing and is a teacher for you so it's amazing and that's what i was talking about on another podcast about heartbreak and stuff is just like taking those challenges and the hard times as life lessons and like doing better next time or learning from that and growing from it and entering your next either relationship or being in a relationship with yourself like learning from from those hard times like people always just focus on the breakups of like what did I do wrong which is good and you can learn from that but you can't just focus on like that is a bad

thing it's a good thing what did you do wrong great let's figure that out and learn from it yeah i think it's also what can i do right yeah and how can i love myself so deeply yeah in order to fuel my life and that's and that is again an ongoing project that everybody should work on every single minute of every day is self-love i've really been working on that for a while now and I can see such a difference in myself even in like three years like just being more aware like think about if you're like starting now to be more aware of self-love think about where you're going to be in three years if you really have intention and and and you show up for yourself every day for three years in three years you'll thank me for this moment right here

I mean who would you be the exactly yeah instead of focusing on cool is that yeah I'm allowed to swear it now I'm like yeah yeah no you are I love it um but I think speaking of intention I think we can close out the podcast by talking about intentions for 2019 and and I'm not one of um those like what's your new year's resolutions because mine is to like I set the bar low my my new year's resolutions are like hey Caitlin drink more wine oh my gosh what I had a client that said like I'm gonna start I'm gonna start a gym this year and and for the first month it's going to be a gym and for the following is going to be a bar. Yeah, it's a great idea. That's my kind of gym. I thought that's so funny. I love that. I just, I just don't, like,

resolutions should be like, like, for me, I'm like, I want to travel more. I feel like that's doable. But, but I feel like people put so much pressure on the resolution things, but I think it should be more of intentions. I think people's resolution should be to have, to be more present, to To use your five, what is it? What do you call them? Your five, is there a name for that? Just the five. Just the five.

Use the five in your new year. And I feel like you'll, you'll see a shift in yourself if you really do those things every day. Yeah. And, and like self-care tips. Give me your, well, those, I guess, the five, but for, I don't know, we have written down tips for the new year. You tell me. Yeah. Oh, you're so cute.

Yeah. Self-care tips. Yeah, drink water. Oh, damn it. That's so important, isn't it? How come, okay, how come I've survived and have pretty decent skin for 33? When I hate water, I hate it.

Is that weird? I really do. Crystal light? She said she has a friend that only drinks Crystal light. That's why I like, that's why I like LeCroix, though, because it's like sparkling and flavored, but I don't. I just can't. Are you bringing me water, Rachel?

Oh. No. I have my coconut water here. Yeah, okay. Drink water. Okay. So I think that the first, the first, the first tip should be to sit with yourself and write down your intentions for this year. Yeah.

What do you want to call into your life? Yeah. Manifest. What do you want to be? Yeah. Who are you? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. put them give her the mic for a sec intentions versus goals what's the difference to you well what do you what do you think i i don't know because i feel like intentions are more like intuitive like inside and what goals are like achieving something yeah i'm trying to yeah i know what you mean i know you mean go ahead go ahead exactly so your intentions listening listening experiencing your sensitivity as your strength from in from the inside then you can take action once you connect with the inside we all want seem to want something else but why can we not just accept like who we are like it is such a beautiful thing to be all unique and different and who we are and why is that so hard

to just have so much love and respect for yourself that why is that such a challenge That's why we're here. To figure that out. We're here to figure that out. We're here to love. And then we're here to help others figure that out and love. And 2018 wasn't a year for love, I don't believe. 2018 was a year for clearing, cleansing, releasing.

Yes. It was a year for opening up the space to do what you want to do, what you've come here to do for this coming year. Okay. That's a really good way to look at it. And then 2019, what do you think? Yeah, that's, I'm like, I'm like, and what do you think 2019 is going to be the year of?

Empowerment, self-empowerment. Mm-hmm. That's what I've been, that's what I've been thinking on. Self-empowerment, yes. Okay, you guys, that's what you have to look forward to. 2019 is the year of empowerment and loving yourself and showing up for yourself. Anything else? All love.

All love. Thank you so much. Thank you. Oh, what a beautiful podcast. I do, too. It's, I mean, I told you this on the car ride over here. It's like, it's always fun to interview, you know, the Bachelor people and reality TV people and musicians. But it's so nice to have like, you know, someone else that just thinks differently and looks at things differently and can just connect and talk to me in like a way where it's like, like, I just want to listen to you.

And I think that people, my listeners will feel the same way. Thank you so much. I'm so grateful to have much you. I'm so, so, so thankful. Well, you're supposed to come into my life. I love you. Love you. Love you too, Rachel.

Love you too, Rachel. Your session is now, Andy. Thanks for listening to Off the Vine, Grape Therapy. Tune in to hear new minisodes every Thursday, and check out new full-length episodes every Tuesday, exclusively on podcast.1.com, the Podcast One app, and subscribe on Apple Podcasts. Who's not with OTV?

This week's grape therapy is sponsored by Good Trouble. Don't miss the series. premiered Tuesday, January 8th, only on Freeform TV and college football playoffs on ESPN. Watch both semifinal games, December 29th, starting at 4 p.m. Eastern.