Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Grape Therapy: Lo Part 2

Episode Date: September 3, 2020

Lo is back for Grape Therapy and this time he’s here to answer your questions, give advice, and tell hilarious stories! GEICO – Go to geico.com , and in fifteen minutes you could be saving 15% or more on car insurance BEST FIENDS – Download Best Fiends FREE on the Apple App Store or Google OXICLEAN – To Work your Magic with OxiClean, go to OxiClean.com/tryme and order a free stain-fighting sample while supplies last HOME DEPOT – You can save even more on the styles you love when you use code OFFTHEVINE10 at checkoutSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Okay, let's talk about the original enemies to lovers story. Before all of our reality TV couples, before the rom-coms, we binge, there was Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in pride and prejudice. And Audible has just dropped a brand new original that will have you completely hooked, I am. It's not just any audiobook. This is a full cast performance. So Marisa Abella, you might know her from industry, brings Elizabeth Bennett to life.

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So whether it's your first time experience. seeing pride and prejudice or you've read it a million times you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again so go listen to pride and prejudice now at audible.ca slash jane austin this week's grape therapy is sponsored by geico go to guyco.com and in 15 minutes you could be saving 15% or more on car insurance extra money in your pocket it just may be the most rewarding to do you do today best fiends engage your brain with fun puzzles collect tons of cute characters with over a hundred million downloads this five-star rated mobile puzzle game is a must play download best fiends on the apple app store or google play that's friends without the r best fiends oxyclean you've got to try oxyclean

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Visit Home Depot.com for more information. Caitlin Bristow is going to answer your questions. Drink to your confessions and hear what you have to say about anything Bachelor. Let's shake it up some more. Here's Caitlin. Welcome to Grape Therapy. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. And we didn't even get a break.

We literally just went into off the vine to this, but you're hearing it a couple days later. So hit it. Cheryl Crowell. What song is that? All I want to do is have some fun. I got a feeling. I'm not the only one. All I want to do.

Yeah. Cheryl, is have some fun until the sun comes up with Santa Monica. Do you know that I never knew she was saying Santa Monica Boulevard? I always thought she was going, oh. The same no disco. This ain't no catch club either. Hey, this is L.A.

Hey. All I want to do is have a little fun before I die. There's a man next to me out of nowhere. Oh, my God. That is a great way to start a podcast. A little Cheryl. Oh, it's so good. A little S.C.

Do you know I reached, oh, here's a confession. Do you know I reached out to somebody that knows her? Oh, uh-huh. And asked if she could write music with me and I never heard back. Well. I mean fair, tough but fair. Yeah. She thinks she's above me.

No, no way. No, I know. She just doesn't know why you. All I want to do. Maybe she'll hear this and end up responding to you. Yeah, right. Yeah, Charlotte Crow for sureless and stuff. Anyways, we're doing a part two.

Yes. So we're going to do, KB and Lowe are in the no. Okay. People are going to ask us. Questions? Yes. And we're going to answer with, you know, we have such good, yeah, expertise. We have such good advice, especially after a bottle of wine.

So let's get started. Yeah. Okay. Hit it with the questions. She doesn't say that. No, every time I say that. What is that song? Hit it.

That's what she starts with. Oh. This ain't no disco. This ain't no country club either. Either. Either. Sure. This is L.O.

All right. I want to do this. I want to want to. Hey, quick question for you. Quick cue. Did you know that right now GEICO is offering an extra 15% credit on car, motorcycle, and RV policies?

That's 15% on top of the money GEICO could already save you. So what are you waiting for? Your dog to make your breakfast in bed with Belgian waffles and a fresh fruit compote. As nice as that sounds, that's probably never going to happen. But at least there's never been a better time to switch to GEICO.

Save an extra 15% when you switch by October 7th. Visit GEICO.com to learn more. Lauren wants to know. This is a vinyl listener here. Lauren wants to know. Best advice for getting ghosted. Have you ever been ghosted? I have been ghosted.

I've ghosted someone and I've... Oh, well, shit. I've ghosted someone and I've been ghosted. What do you prefer? Of course. Being the ghost-stor, being the person who does it. Being like Patrick Swayzey. He died.

No, I know. R-I-P, but wasn't he the ghost and ghost? No, but wasn't he the ghost? Whoopi Goldberg was. No. I, shut up. Hold on. Yes, Patrick Swayze did die in real life.

And yes, he did die in the movie. and he was the ghost. Yeah, so that's what I'm saying. So then why did you make me feel stupid? What I said, Patrick Swayzee. Because I thought you meant like he's ghosting someone. I don't know. Yeah, he was ghosting Demi Moore.

Yeah. Anyways. But that's like, okay. You've been ghosted. He's literally a ghost. I'm not trying to haunt my loved one. and straddle them while they're on a ceramics wheel. Okay.

Tell me about both. When you ghost someone, do you feel like a dick or are you just like? I do. I haven't ghosted. That was like 21-year-old low that would do shit like that. I feel like that's such an immature move. Yeah.

People, but I also have come to terms with why people will do something like that. If people handle conflict differently. Would you, could you imagine wanting to date again a guy or girl that ghosts you? No way. Like when somebody asks, and Lauren, no offense, this is a great question. But best advice for getting ghosted is never even look that person's way again, delete them out of your phone, be above it. Because could you imagine wanting to go on a second date with somebody who ghosted you?

I could not. No. Uh-uh. I did have someone that I ghosted. Yeah. And that ghosts of Christmas pasts came back and knocking on my door. Well, of course, because they were the ghostie. Yeah, they were the ghosty.

You were the ghosty. And I was like, boo, and we're back. Those are the people that want more. And we're back. And we ended up, we ended up dating for a little bit. But anyway. Well, what the fuck? And then did you ghost him again?

No, no, no. Then I did not get a ghost. The no was like you've never done it before. No, Caitlin. How dare. No. But for Lauren, if you've been ghosts, that sucks. I think everyone experiences it in some way with a friend or someone.

I've had it happen with someone I was into. I've also had it happen, even a friend who ghosted. I've been ghosted by a friend. I'm like, what the hell? That's a weird one because you're not in a relationship. So there's like a certain boundary. Like you can't push too much because it's friendship. Yeah.

But it's also like you don't want someone to just like ghost you like that. What friend treats other people like that? Anyway. And then it's just like, it's a bruise to the ego. It's a bruise to the ego. But it's also like you, your time is precious and worth something. You don't just, you know, you don't just make plans of somebody just for the, your time is precious. That's my main point.

Can I say, though, just a little sidebar. Sure. A little PS. A little PS. Post script. Mm-hmm. Yeah. If you've been ghosted, I have a get out of jail free card for anyone who's doing ghosting.

A friendships only during COVID-19. Like anyone who's been ghosted in the year. I've got a cough. What? That's what you say, to get out of something. I'm coughing. Oh, uh-huh. Oh. I thought that's what you're saying.

Like, like you've got a tip for people if you want to get out of something without ghosting. You just say, I have a cough. Oh, yeah. No, I, that's not. Sorry. No, that's not where I was going. But I get what you're saying. I get oh advice like that's something you can say as an excuse no I was just going to say during right now the pandemic times because I feel like everyone's world is turned upside down so I'm just saying everyone gets a get out of jail free card friendship wise yeah because I have one friend and I didn't hear from this friend in like three months and I was like what the hell in my head I said that but I was like you got to show a little grace right now because everyone handles what the hell's going on in 2020 so different so I'm just putting that out there like

I think right now I'm being a little bit more like understanding and lenient that if someone I didn't, I love and I'm not talking to them and I haven't heard from them in a few months. I'm not going to be upset about it. That's fair. Right? Just right now. Just right now. But if they do it again, I will cut you. Oh, and it's a new year.

Yeah. And like this pandemic's over. Yeah. And that shit happens again. Yeah. Test me. Yeah. Block.

Delete report for bullying. I'm doing it all. You're dead to me. D.T. Have you seen that show on Netflix? So good. Oh, I'm so good. I'm obsessed. First season is way better than the second, but both are.

Both are great, but I agree. But not by much. They're both very good. Yeah. Okay. Courtney wants to know our best tips for getting yourself out of a funk. It's hard because in this time, all you want to do is being a funk. You just want to throw on sweatpants. You don't want to put on makeup.

This whole year is a funk. This whole year is a funk. And I, I, my advice is. to don't try and get yourself out of a funk be in the funk you know you're feeling down get get down

lower yeah get that razor blitz no my dark humor Caitlin is just not ready for that it's got so hot I know

wave of heat just I was going to say my humor is going to say when they go high you go lower like popping pills um no i get it how do you get out of i well i was wait i actually wasn't a funk when recently i okay so the covid hit so why your cheek bones are so popping yeah depression and anxiety makes my bone structure enhanced um and i stopped eating but stop i was really sad for uh january hopes and dreams were like woohoo this year I'm going to conquer the year it's my year and then March

hit or February and March were rough I was I was in such a weird like I was in a depression hard for me to get out of bed and I will say podcasts did help me a lot just because it gave me like access to another world without having to leave my bed totally which was great and then I know it's tough but I would make a list I put 10 things on the list they were the most basic shit, Caitlin, brush your teeth, get out of bed, like, freaking... I get that, though. Sometimes, because I suffer from everyone that listens to my podcast, you're like, we know you suffer from hormonal depression.

I say it all the time. But I do. It's a real thing. It sucks. It really is little things that are small things that are big wins. Give yourself a victory. Yeah. Like, literally brushing your teeth sometimes can be a small win.

a big win if you will yeah it really can but that's okay yeah so that that helped me and then every well I just I was like so competitive with myself so I did 10 and then the next week I was like I'm going to do 12 things then I'm doing lists of 40 things to do dang now you're just a little overachiever yeah if you look at the list is settled down it's like boil an egg stuff but again they're wins yeah they are wins i i respect that i respect that getting yourself out of a funk is very hard i would yeah that can be our advice small baby steps because that makes a big change eventually totally we should be therapists let's take a moment to talk about having a little downtime lately even if you don't i hope you've been playing one of my favorite games out there

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cellular data, without access to Wi-Fi, which is pretty cool. I've pretty much gotten all of my friends and family hooked on the game, so I love to see who can get to the furthest levels the fastest. Spoiler alert, it's more. You're going to love the puzzles, the cute characters, even though they happen to be bugs, but still very cute, and all new challenges that come your way. Best Fiends has thousands of levels already with new levels events and characters added every month. It's hours of fun right at your fingertips. With over 100 million downloads, tons of five-star reviews, Best Fiends is a must-play. So download Best Fiends free on Apple App Store or Google Play.

That's Friends Without the R, Best Fiends. Brooke is asking specifically for Lowe. What have been some of your hardest and proudest moments being part of the LGBT community? Hmm. My, wait, what was the? Hardest and proudest. Hardest and proudest. Oh, I'd say

Hardest is God, there's been a lot of hard moments in this community. I have to say, too, not feeling part of it has been a hard thing for me. I never felt part of it because one, I didn't have a ton of gay friends. And then I always felt like

I wasn't, like I wasn't gay enough to be part of like the squad. Yeah, yeah. Like some friends, I do have gay friends, of course, guys I'm talking about, but like they are, they have like their like, they're like a wolf pack of people. They're just like they're just and they, they list are different than I felt like I didn't connect with them for some reason.

I felt like excluded in some sort of way. I don't know. Maybe it's because like I'm down to have a good time, but like there's certain things I wasn't doing that they were definitely into and like, I don't know, just wasn't my thing. I was in a very serious relationship for, I was in a seven year relationship. Oh, my God. So. It was seven years?

Yeah. So I was with someone for that long, but that's like from the age of like, I'd say five and then two of like, we're still sleeping together, but we're not officially together. But five years from 20 to 25 years old, being in a committed relationship, those are like you wave your freak flag and have fun. And if you're gay and you're 20 to 25 and you're in West Hollywood, woo, like you're living. Yeah.

Your truth. And I was not. I was like, I felt like a suburban housewife, you know, I was looking up barefoot contessa recipes and like basically just doing Pilates courses and focusing on my career. So I didn't build that core friend group. So that was a difficulty for me in the community. Now I'd say like gay marriage being accepted. And I say that like certain conservative friends that I have being way more open minded. Yes.

God, it feels really good. Yeah, I agree. I mean, I'm obviously not a gay human being, but I see a change in like the world with acceptance. Yeah. I really do. And maybe it feels differently for you, but I'm sure you see it. Oh, for sure.

Yeah. I almost think it's like cyclical. Like, okay, well, not cyclical. But I remember my mom and dad's generation, it was tough. They were telling me and I've watched enough documentaries that to see a black male or a black person and a white person get together was like, that was a shocking thing. oh my god that's crazy right that's living on the edge right literally of race yeah whoa now that's like not a thing at all right for some people those racist ass people out there that is still a thing

but i'm saying we've come like yours it's like crazy that that would be an issue the people that think that's an issue are actually i think a smaller demographic as opposed to like what the world view is of interracial couples and the same thing if you saw a gay couple um like today or i'd say when i like 10 years ago it was a little bit more like oh my gosh like gay couple like there was a little like stigma with it right where now i feel like people like yeah you know what's so cute is to see um like my little godson yeah and he has a gay teacher and it's like even me being a 30 year old man i still have some sort of a stigma even in my head of like oh god of what are people going to say or they'll judge me a little bit yeah especially if i don't

know them very well. I still think that in my head, but to see my little Godson, who's all of 10 years old, and it's like not a big deal. It's just like, the sky is blue, my teacher's gay. It is what it is. Right. It's not a thing. For it to not be a thing is, I think the coolest, that's like the biggest win for the community. Of course. Yeah. That is really cool because that's how it should be. I was talking to a girl earlier. I did a podcast with a girl named Cammy, and she is gay and just lovely. And she has, you, channel and we were talking kind of about that same thing about like how it's so crazy to be a thing that's coming out is just like you know it's this thing where you'd want to get to a point where

it's like you don't have to come out it's just like you know like you don't have to come out and say you're straight right exactly that's what we were saying like it shouldn't even be a thing you should just that's who you are why do we have to talk about it or even I mean I don't want to say we shouldn't celebrate it but it's why should it be such a you know a taboo right right like a good for you thing it's like no that's who you are it's good for everybody that's a big win yeah to not be as such a scary thing yeah so yeah and also like like feeling accepted by the community is really cool like i went out there and marched with everybody which was so fun and i went to pride and i felt part of it yeah like for the first time

ever being part of a community like that. Yeah. They like embrace me. Yeah. So I think I just had to get older with it. And then like, you know, yeah, there's like the promiscuous fun like, woo, let's do Coke. Like we're crazy 20 year olds. Yeah.

And I'm like, I'm not that. Right. But I am down to like have pride and stuff now. Yeah. I think that's really awesome. And I think this is such a generation for change where maybe the next generation like because of, you know, you. guys walked so they all could run yeah that's cool that's cool you're part of such a big change

i think that oh i do that's so sweet part of change you are you really are making moves um switching gears uh danny wants to know our thoughts on brittney spheres conspiracy conspiracy theories out there i don't think there's any conspiracy theories i think it's just like records and documents and, like, proof that she's being held against her will. Yep. Literally, everybody says in their comments, wear yellow if you want help. And she's always like, my favorite color is yellow.

I'm wearing yellow. It's like, we see you. They did another. Someone wrote, like, wear black if you really need help. And she's like, this is my favorite blazer. It's black. Oh, my God, you kind of do sound like her. A little bit.

Yeah. Oh, I love Brittany. It kills me to see what, like, what's happening to her is the saddest thing. it's really but don't you think okay my one thing that makes me feel better she doesn't seem sad oh I think she does you're right I just tried to say that to make myself it's like she looks sad like with the smudgy liner and the but have you seen Heather McMahon's um Instagram highlights of her Britney 911 theories no she thinks if you have some spare time habit tonight doing it like that right now it's it's actually quite incredible and she says she thinks

it's like permanent tattooed makeup on but that brittany didn't like that so she just keeps trying to add or smudge or do something like there's so many i don't want to say conspiracy theories but theories out there on what it is but i just think man could you imagine if she is freed from all this and she can tell her truth and like yeah be and she's so celebrated throughout the world because people, like, genuinely love her. Yeah. And she's been a pop icon for 20 years. Oh, God.

But I will say silver lining, though, although it could be weird. That hot boyfriend that she has, Sam, oh, he is gorgeous. But I'm like, what's going on there? I mean, I know. He's trying to help her. He's trying to help her. So I'm glad she at least has him there. And I love her little, like.

Their workout videos. Oh, my God. When he has a little cameo and she goes, baby. Oh, my God. They're so cute. I actually love them. I think he's a- I'm rooting for Brittany since day one.

I've been ruined for her. And those two together. Yeah, me too. I want them to make it. I want them to make it too. She's got so serious. My voice just got quieter. Quick question.

Do you ever ruin that brand new white shirt you just fell in love with? Maybe had a little spill or two and just couldn't bring it back to life. So sad. I've had this happen to me a few times. So just a couple of weeks ago, actually, I was wearing the cutest new white shirt. new white shirt and feeling pretty good about myself. And next thing you know, I spilled on myself, as pretty usual. I had to throw this shirt out because I could not get the stain out no matter what I tried. And I was really sad about it. And I wish I had known what I know now. And that is

oxyclean white revive. Oxyclean White Revive revives your dingy whites, bringing them back to brilliant and bright. And it's safe on colors too. This is a serious, serious game changer. It has 40% more whitening power than chlorine bleach per load without any of the negatives that come along with using chlorine bleach. It can seriously save those items you thought were ruined and heading for the trash. I've had this happen to me more than once. Or those whites that just aren't so white anymore. I have a few pairs of white sheets that just didn't look as great as they once did. And I was not thrilled about it, but OxyClean White Revive has brought them back to life.

You've got to try OxyClean White Reviive laundry, whitener, and stain remover for yourself. To work your magic with OxyClean, go to oxyclean.com slash try me and order a free sample. That's OxyClean.com slash T-R-Y-M-E for a free stain fighting sample while supplies last. We'll be right back with more off the vine, grape therapy. Don't Miss Spencer and Heidi recap Laguna Beach on the Spidey podcast. Lauren was the nice girl, but she wasn't that sweet. Even growing up in L.A., I'd always heard about the Laguna bubble and, like, how everyone hooks up with everyone. Like, that was, like, a known thing at Laguna Beach.

I mean, there's never been a show like this before. You've seen Kristen and, like, her jacuzzi laying out, like, who even lives like this? Get new episodes of the Spidey Podcast on Apple Podcasts, Podcasts, Podcasts, Podcasts, One, and Spotify. You're listening to Off the Vine Race Therapy. Brianna or Brianna, I'm not sure, wants to know any race. recommendations for maternity clothes or styling tips for ladies with bumps. I love embracing the bump. Me too.

A lot of... Like a onesy. Like a tight cat suit onezy. Hey, if you want to rock that cat suit, that's what I'll be doing. Sounds really comfortable. That's what I'll be doing. But no, I think embracing the bump for, I have dressed a lot of women when they go through the maternity phase.

And I noticed that a lot of them want to camouflage the belly. Why? I don't know. I mean, they're very self-conscious. Some women are. I shouldn't say why because I have had some serious dysmorphia with my body, as you know, where I, but I don't know because part of me thinks like once I'm pregnant, I'll be like, I am carrying life. I'm so beautiful. But you never know until you get there.

Well, you, I know one friend of mine slash client and she did feel like that. I'm carrying life. I'm so excited. But then the next month, she's like, I'm frigging the worst. just felt disgusting and you go through that it's totally normal but i will say one embracing the bump is great um and two i would say uh sometimes maternity clothes can be a little bit pricey um target has some great options but i love target but i will say i know sometimes it's like oh should i spend on that it's only like a temporary thing especially if you're going up a few sizes

and spend on the clothes like treat yourself queen treat yourself spend the money because i've I've also had clients that are sometimes like, why am I going to spend all that? There's no point. You could sell it. They resell it, whatever. Just take care of yourself and splurge and get yourself the cute, comfortable jeans. Yeah, feel good. Yeah.

I like that advice. I have maternity jeans that I wear at Thanksgiving. They're the best. It's like Joey. And on friends, could I be wearing any more clothes? That wasn't that funny. Jenny Barbeseu She says

Caitlin what do you think your life would be like If you had never gone on The Bachelor I want to know your perspective on this Oh my I already know Go Okay just if there's a local Chili's Caitlin would be Serving up

She'd be a number one waitress I would Or If you hadn't gone on the Bachelor Yeah You hadn't been the Bachelor Or the Bachelor okay Man

You know what Okay. I joke and say you'd be at Chili's or a red lobster, but which you'd kill it. You'd kill it in that industry too. But I still think you'd be right where you are today. I have no doubt in my mind. I don't. I think that you had a platform that was fantastic and you had millions of people watching you on television, which was great. But I think if you hadn't done that, it would have been something else. It would have been something in entertainment. Sure, big brother. porn. that's my plan B for all times anyways yeah no everybody's picturing it now and I'm awkward next question I just think you'd always be where you're supposed to be which is having influence in the world and a great podcast and a great voice I have no doubt in my mind that you'd be successful and still in this industry don't you think that for yourself I think that for you yeah I mean I think of all the times I was just so like lost and stuck and I was like

I'm just meant to be doing something so different. Yeah. Totally. I feel forever grateful for this microphone in my voice right now. Yeah. Yeah. That was a weird way to put it, but I mean it. Mallory

says how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could check wood? I always say nine. I'm going to go with 15. 15 pieces of would okay oh Courtney Michelle 0 through 3 says how did you two become so close I love you both and how do we become the three BFFs LOL but how did we become so close I mean I know we were introduced by somebody but it was instant yeah you know when you meet so well I feel like that

with you yeah oh yeah I knew I was like there's something special but we were introduced I have I had a client who I no longer work with yeah and uh Anyway, this client said, oh, my girlfriend, Caitlin, is looking for a stylist. Long story short, we met. And then. But it was like, my girlfriend, Caitlin, needs a stylist. Yes. It's a stylist, yeah.

And then you changed my life. Oh, wow. That's. In many ways, with your humor, with your heart, and with your... Shit, that's so sweet. And with your style with you. with your eye for fashion. Yeah.

Because you got me. You got my style. You got me and, and you're my kind of peeps. Yeah. I just remember thinking you were so kind and I had an experience, I'm going to tell, I'm going to just lay it out, spill the tea on this podcast. I have had a lot of clients in my life. I've worked with a lot of people in all different walks of life, all different levels of

fame. And I will say that Caitlin was such a wake-up call for me because I didn't. didn't realize how shitty I'd been treated and how, I hate that, and how, but it was like such a silver, like a great blessing. I didn't realize that like, wait a minute, like, people don't have to be rude or don't have to take advantage or could be super kind and respectful. It just, and you valued me. And it just really changed. And I was like, hold up. I'm enjoying drinking this little Caitlin Bristow cocktail. This is incredible. I remember and you were like, are you hungry? And I was like, what?

Oh my God. At our first fitting, you're like, do you want to order you some room service? Clients are not like that. And you have to understand that a lot of clients are, thank God I have great ones now. But in the beginning, I was taking on so many different people. But actors and actresses are usually a little bit more on the narcissistic side.

Anyway, Caitlin was my wake-up call. And that's why we became so close because I was like, not only do I love styling her, but if I was gone, I'd want to spend every moment with her. It's the truth. We are a little best friends, aren't we? We're going to get into a little more of a serious question here. Mary Kill.

Tacos, enchiladas, cassidias. Oh, my God. Yeah. I'm going to kill enchiladas. Really? Just take it off. Okay. It's just a lot of sauce, cheese.

It is a lot of sauce and cheese. And I'm going to marry tacos. Get it. Because there's so many different options. We're talking tacos al pastore. Garnesada. Boil assada. We could do a little Baja fresh tacos, shrimp.

You know, there's a lot of options. So that's a great marriage. It keeps it lively and fun. And then I'm going to, what was the other? Oh, I'll f***a Cazadea any day. A little warm pocket of Cazzo. There you go. What about you?

Oh, dang. I mean, I would probably, I'm just agree. with everything you just said there's no fighting that no that was now this is my favorite question are you ready for it yeah how do you know when you're ready for a new peen after you've had the same peen for 10 years oh wow i mean the fact that she's asking how do you know you're ready for a new peen after 10 years is just a sure sign that she's ready for a new peat you're ready for some fresh oh dickity-de-day get it for real though i'm like is she joking or serious because How do you know?

You're writing a random stranger asking when the time is for a new peen after 10 years. I mean, that's how you know you got a good peen. 10 years. I hope Jason is not. Jason's mom is not listening. But I'm like, I could. Yeah, you're good with that pain. I'd be happy with that peen for the next 100 years.

Wow. 100 year pain. Yeah. That's incredible. Yeah. Wow. Maybe it's just his heart. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. I know you've heard me say it before, but there is more to explore at the Home Depot. From furniture and home decor to bedding and more, Home Depot.com has endless options for every space. In fact, they are sponsoring a really, really fun segment in Off the Vine, where I get to share some of my decorating expertise. So let's dive in. So I, for one, love decorating my space. I definitely haven't always been the expert that I am today. I have used my friend Jessica McCarthy.

she's an incredible decorator and has found me a lot of cute stuff from Home Depot. I wouldn't call myself an expert by any means, but I have improved my decor and home improvement game a lot lately by getting myself deep into Home Depot and their site. I really do love design, but I always have certain questions like, is this the right tile? How much is this actually going to cost? What size of rug would look good in this room? And what's the best way to fill an empty wall? And in the past, I would typically just take a stab in the dark, go for it, see how it worked out, maybe a call Jessica, but now I have Home Depot and their website, which has been a serious game changer for me and my home. Home Depot doesn't just have appliances and lighting and hardware,

although they do have the amazing stuff that you think of when you think of Home Depot. But they also have help for DIY projects and even things like home decor, plants, oh, I love plants, and luggage. So they're really the perfect go-to for anything you might be looking for. one thing I came across on their site recently, in addition to the DIY videos, which I mentioned seriously saved me when I had to fix a drawer, is their project calculator section. So I was redoing my kitchen and they have this countertop calculator where you can actually go in, put the length and shape of your countertops, select different types of countertops, and then figure out exactly how much this project is going to cost you. I kind of sound like a geek right now. And I feel like I'm officially

such an adult that I think a project calculator is cool, but it really is. They also have calculators for wallpaper projects. I love doing a wallpaper accent wall. Yes. And for paint, deck resurfacing, and even moving so you can see how much it's going to cost you before you even get started. This would have helped me actually so much in the past when I began a project, not realizing how much over budget I was going to go. Well, now I know. And even if you want to take on some of their projects by yourself, you also have the option to go to Home Depot for more than 400 Home improvement services for those things that you just can't or don't want to try to DIY. I, for one, am not someone who wants to mess with things like electrical or HVAC, so I'm really

happy that I have a go-to when I need some help. With the Home Depot, decorating your home is now easier than ever before. Start by heading to homedepo.com where you can shop everything for every room, browse thousands of furniture pieces and decorative accents to fit any style, explore bedding and bath linens, kitchenware, and small appliances, all at the right price. Whether you're going for a brand new look, a little seasonal refresh, or simply a few finishing touches, the Home Depot has all of the pieces you need. And the best part, shop today and you'll get free and flexible delivery with easy returns. Plus, for a limited time, you can save even more on the styles that you love when you use

code off the vine 10 at checkout. Find exactly what you're looking for and more at home depot.com slash decor. Valid on select items online only, free delivery on select items $45 or more. Visit home depot.com for more information. Do you think this candle smells like lavender, vanilla, or bug spray? I don't think it smells like bugs spray. You don't? No, I think it smells like not lavender vanilla, though.

It smells like a cologne. It smells kind of like a cheap cologne in a bathroom when they have like the guy that's like, do you want cologne? Oh, like at a really weird bar where you're like you like that perfumes. Do they have those in girls' restrooms? Yeah. They do with like, oh, do you want some perfume? Yeah, which I always find so weird because I'm like, you pour things sitting in a freaking bathroom while drunk girls and guys come in and like pee and vomit and you're like,

would you like a mint? Would you like some cologne? And I feel like people aren't nice to them. No, especially if they're drunk. And everyone, no, who cares cash anymore, especially in COVID? No. So you can't tip them unless they have Venmo and then that's like you're drunk and it's a hassle. I just, is that a thing of the past, you think?

I hope so. Yeah. I hate, I hate it. I mean, I don't want people to be out of a job, but. That's one that needs to go. Maybe. I want to eliminate that job. It's the worst job.

Someone's standing outside while I'm taking a dump. Waiting with soap. Waiting with freaking soap and a paper towel. It reminds me of this time that I, um, I was out of money. No. Yeah. It's not as bad as you think. Oh, I thought you did that.

No. It's worse. I was out of money and, um, my friend owned a business called TikTok, believe it or not. It was not this TikTok. Oh, I thought you could have been a billion. No. Secretly I'm a billionaire. No, it was called TikTok and it was an app in Vancouver that it like showed you

the greatest deals at restaurants. what nights were having like drink specials or whatever and i went from being a cheerleader in the cfl to being a mascot who danced with the cheerleaders for a hundred dollars yeah what was the what was the mascot what was the costume it was just a green box with arms and legs and some googly eyes oh you can see your face at all no but i do remember getting on the field and dancing with the cheerleaders like years after I danced with a cheerleader or as a cheerleader

and the girls were all taking pictures with me being like you're so cute and I was like oh my God they think I'm like a child under here and then somebody pushed me into the crowd and I like fell and then some other guy helped me up and said whatever they're paying you it's not worth it

that sucks yeah you had a bad day you take your one That's how I'm starting to play. Yeah. Oh, man. Did you ever have a really bad job where you're just like?

No. No, I've just always been a really good style. I've always been a celebrity style. No, I've had bad jobs, but not like that. That sucks. There it is. Just picture me in my TikTok costume. Getting pushed around a crowd

Yep Dance and cheerleaders You're so cute Sweat in the bottom Genuinely real story I had to jump on the sky train after And I couldn't get my box through the door Okay

I was on the bus People were laughing at me Why were they laughing at you? Because I was a mascot on the sky frame Trying to get through the doors You had to take your costume home I had to take money out of my $100 To pay for the sky train

You know Here we go Because you had a bad day You take a run down Oh no I'm trying to think if I had any bad jobs. Oh, I have had one. Come on.

Well, it's not a bad job. It's just a bad story that makes life suck. Go on. Well, I was working at a really high-end retailer. The name is Burberry. Have you guys heard of that brand? I probably haven't. Yeah, I have, yeah.

Burry. They're known for trench coats. Okay. Pretty bags. Umbrellas. Scarves. Yeah. Scarves are a big thing.

You're spending like $4 to $700 on a scarf. I mean, $3,000, some scarves. They're crazy expensive. Anyway, it's a fancy store. I was at the store in Beverly Hills working. This is a young low. Work in retail. Yeah.

Got to start somewhere. Got to start somewhere. And I remember the clientele that we had, they were like these rich-ass people that were like super demanding. Anyway, I wanted to show this client and she spent so much money. And everyone's like, oh, that's, I forget her name. Let's say it's say it's Victoria. Like she's here and she's going to spend it.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. She's going to spend a ton of money. Yeah. And she said, I'm looking for a fabulous coat. And it was her and her really good looking son. Why do rich people always say fabulous? I'm looking for a fabulous coat.

I know. Yeah. That's true. They do. Yeah. Rich people love that word. They do. So I had to show her some fab coats.

Yeah. I thought I would throw up. so I'm like oh sure you know we have some fabulous options to bring you run to the stock room by the way and all these fancy-ass expensive boutiques usually in the back it's just like not cute at all yeah you should see the way they're like chuck and louis Vuitton bags and stuff yeah like I remember like people with flaming hot cheetos like you know it's you treat the bags with respect of course but like it can get a little rough in the back stock room yeah anyway I went And I grabbed every coat and the size, like, I had a ton of them.

And I was feeling so sick, Caitlin. Oh, no. I had a little bit of mocha, or mocos, that's boogers in my nose. In Canada, we say boogers. Boogers. Yeah. I was super congested. Yeah.

And, but I had to work because I was like, I need the money. Guys got to eat. Guys got to eat. Yeah. So, um, I grabbed all the coats and I grabbed way too many. Like I wanted her to have every option. I got leather trench. She wanted trench coats, everything.

And I'm all in my arm, boom. And I'm like, and it's a lot of work. You go to the stock room. It's like, it's a little bit of a trek, you know, so a little bit of the sweats. Plus I had a fever. Oh. This would not land in 2020. No, I would not.

This is, I don't know. This was a decade ago. But anyway, so I go into the stock room. I grab all the coats. And then I go up to the lady and I'm holding them all. And she's like, oh, my gosh, she's look great. And she's talking to me about another coat. It's on a mannequin.

And I'm like, oh, yeah, well, that's part of the VAL collection. And it's all so fabulous. It has the fur, whatever. And I just feel it. I feel it coming. The sneezes coming. And I have all the coats, and I'm sweating profusely. And her family, it's her son and her.

And I think it was like her bitchy gay friends. They're so rude to me. Anyway, I ended up sneezing and I held it in. I held it in. Uh-oh. And I went through the nose. And it came out your ears. Came out.

Okay. Oh, that's never happening? Came out my nose, but I had so much congestion that it pushed the boogies out. But I had all these coats. And I'm talking like each coat must have been like three to $5,000. Really expensive stuff. Did you have paid from? No, no, no.

The boogers landed on my mouth. So then I thought, what do I do in the situation? Do I wipe my boogers on the? the new coat that she could buy and I could have got that commission or do I eat them I ate them I took I did a little lick with my tongue I'm gonna throw up you're gone I'm just thinking about it and I just remember she was like disgusted no shit I'm like so I went like and I was like oh my god and then like I kind of turned away and I went like well I remember kind of being like I'm gonna throw up in my head.

She didn't buy a coat. Oh. Lost the customer. Wow. I was really hoping for a happy ending. Yeah. Oh, the rich ladies is just going to feel bad for the guy dripping in boogies. The fabulous boogies.

And I remember it was that moment like hit it. You had a bad day. That's when I was like, damn, like this, my life sucks right now. It was really rough. Wow. You've been through it. you're a survivor i'm so brave i'm so brave thank you for sharing your story and having the courage to um tell me that yeah it was really gross eating your bookies like that tees and peas you've eaten

your bookers thoughts and prayers um i have not you have i have not you've never had are you serious promise you you know i would tell you i've done some gross shit i've never eaten my boogs I really haven't. As a kid, I know your mom has a video of you. Never did. Pick in a winner. Nope, never did. I didn't eat them when I was a kid.

Just when you're older. I just when I was in my 20s. It had a big, a lot of snot. Yeah, but you did it for the fabulous coats. You did it for the commission. My love of fashion. And you know what? That's why you're doing what you do today.

All right. Thank you. Thank you for sharing your story with us. Thank you for coming over. and having delicious dinner with me and doing poop two podcasts. Yeah, this is when you know you've got to go. And let's do this again every week that I'm in L.A.

Yeah, sleepovers. She has an extra bedroom. Oh, my gosh. You know how we talked about our dreams? Sleepover where we're going to eat edibles and watch movies and do a live podcast. It's going to happen. Stay tuned next week. Okay, I just want to say I love you.

I love you too. And tell everybody where they can find. you. Oh yeah. You can find me. Your stories keep getting funnier. Oh, thank you for that. I'm putting in a lot of effort to make them funny. No, I die every time. You can follow me on the gram at style L-V-R at S-T-Y-L-E-L-V-R and the best stories you'll ever follow. Yeah, I'm on Twitter too, but I mainly love the gram. Yeah. So find me on there. Find them on the gram. Yeah. And tweet us and do anything you can if you want to hear more low on the podcast. No, but don't hurt my feelings like i do it i'm okay too

goodbye okay i'm breasted your session tonight one day thanks for listening to off the vine grape therapy tune in to hear new mini-sodes every thursday and check out new full-length episodes every tuesday

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