Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Grape Therapy: Zach & Kaity Join KB in NYC

Episode Date: March 30, 2023

This is a juicy one, Vinos… the happy couple, Zach Shallcross and Kaity Biggar, are here to answer all your burning questions! Zach, Kaitlyn, and another Kaitlyn (yes… Kaity is a Kaitlyn from Canada, too) are talking about everything from their season and what’s to come next. What did we not get to learn about their relationship on our screens? How did editing play a part in their story? How did they get through watching the season back, including “sex week”? And, how did Zach deal with getting hate before and during his season, including from Bachelor alumni themselves? Zach and Kaity are sharing how communication has gotten them through the struggles so far, what surprised them watching the season back, and the next steps of their relationship. Plus, we find out a weird step they’re taking in their relationship (possibly tonight…) and what goes down in the private OTV group chat.  Thank you to our sponsors! Check out these deals for the Vinos: CANOPY - Go to getcanopy.co to save $25 on your Canopy Humidifier purchase today with Canopy’s filter subscription and use code VINE at checkout to save an additional 10% off your Canopy purchase! PROGRESSIVE - Multitask right now. Quote your car insurance at Progressive.com to join the ov er 29 million drivers who trust Progressive. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Okay, let's talk about the original enemies to lovers story. Before all of our reality TV couples, before the rom-coms, we binge, there was Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in pride and prejudice. And Audible has just dropped a brand new original that will have you completely hooked, I am. It's not just any audiobook. This is a full cast performance. So Marisa Abella, you might know her from industry, brings Elizabeth Bennett to life.

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So whether it's your first time experiencing Pride and Prejudice or you've read it a million times, you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again. So go listen to Pride and Prejudice now at audible.ca slash Jane Austen. Wine, lots of day. It's time for Off the Vine, Grape Therapy. Welcome to your weekly session. Caitlin and friends are here to share unfiltered advice, lots of laughs, and some major breakthroughs. So put your feet up, pop a cork, and get ready for some grape therapy.

This episode of grape therapy is brought to you by Canopy. Go to getcanopy.co to save $25 on your canopy humidifier purchase today with Canopies filter subscription and my listeners can use code Vine at checkout to save an additional 10% off your canopy purchase and Progressive. Multitask right now. Quote your car insurance at Progressive. dot com to join the over 29 million drivers who trust Progressive. Off the Vine.

Let's fucking go. It's fucking go. Off the Vine. LFG. I still laugh at Off the Vine because I was sitting one time trying to come up with a name and I was going to call it Off the Cuff. Could you imagine? Off the cuff with Caleb Bristow.

That's not so stupid now. Um, I've got Zach and Katie in the flesh, the happy couple. It's, I know you guys do your like happy couple weekends while the show is airing. Um, I have so many questions to get to because I love interviewing people from this franchise because I can be like, I get it. Everyone has a different story, of course, but I'm a very empathetic person. And I want to say, first of all, you're a freaking boss for how you handle everything. Oh, thank you. You're just like composed.

and cool and maybe you're like we all have a bit of I'm crazy behind closed doors but like that's who cares because this is what they say have you heard about the chart of cool and hot I know what is this like the crazy hot scale yeah

the crazy hot scale you're supposed to be what a three on the crazy scale and an eight on the hot scale like it's like inverted almost right like the hotter you are the crazier you are but there's like unicorns that exist Yes, it's a whole thing. My dad showed me when I was a kid.

Oh, my goodness. My dad showed me when I was a kid. He's like, son. This is what you got. And then you found your. And I found the unicorn. You found the unicorn. I did.

You really did. You are a little freaking unicorn. It's amazing. You guys, first and foremost, for being here because I know how this media world works and we're back from COVID. So usually in the last few years, people have just been able to do like Zoom and you can just be in your hotel room. But you guys were like jumping.

on a plane, getting to New York, red eye, time changes, back to back. You both look rested as fuck. I don't understand. Makeup. Yeah, you know, too, though. Tons. No. A little bit. Did Carrie dress you today? I couldn't do this myself. Yeah.

He's so good, isn't he? He's so good. It's a great, too. He's a great man. Did you get your hair makeup done for the finale? No. What in the goof? Okay, so I thought Gabby, too, I was like, oh, she got her she got her makeup done for today. Then I saw her like, get ready with me? And I was like, hey, they didn't give you makeup. They did, they did touchups, but no, you're on your own then.

No, you are. Thank you. You are. Okay, what a week. It's only Wednesday. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. How are you guys feeling mentally in this?

Because I know you're like riding this high and in love and happy and you're like, holy shit, we get to go for dinner together. Yeah. That's like the little things are so much fun. But you're also tired and you've been through a lot. So exhausted. Are you just tired, but how? Happy, but cranky, but all the emotions.

Yeah, hangary, throw that in the mix. You know, like, we both, when we're hungry, we're just in our own little world. But it's fun because you're with the person you love and you're doing something that you really never thought a million years you do. Yeah, truly. So that you're kind of pinching yourself half the time, yet hangary. Yeah. So it's a cool balance.

Yeah. It's exciting and all the emotions, truly. Yeah. But more or less, just like, so happy, so excited to finally be able to announce her and age, man. Finally. Oh, my gosh. You're waiting for this day for so long. So long.

It feels like forever. Do you cherish those little times, though, that you had the secret little hideaways? Because when you're in those secret hideways, you're doing what, seeing, well, you live in the same city. So how often were you seeing each other? Well, actually, I've been in California while filming. So she was in Texas. So she would fly out to LA for our happy couple of visits. Oh, so it really was every, like, what, other weekend or something you guys got to spend together?

It depends. ended on her schedule because not nursing. Yeah, I was nursing and he was busy with like grass. You went right back to work? Yeah. She went right back. Yeah. Yeah.

It was actually kind of good. It distracted me from all the chaos going on. That's true. And I just got to focus on that. And nobody really knew that I was on the show at work. That's nice. Yeah. It was just nice.

That is nice because a lot of people will sit at home and like stir and marinate and everything and not distract themselves and get a bit lost. And all of them is so busy. Um, those, so what I was saying was you, I hope you cherish those little months because when you're in it, you're like, I just want to be out in public. And then you get out in public and you're like, well, we have no privacy now. That's what I was saying. Yeah. Where people like going not seeing you guys, uh, like at dinner or when you got off the plane, have people been a little bit of pot, quite a bit of paparazzi. Unfortunately for like dinner, we had like a nice cubby in the back. So we had some privacy. Yeah. The streets, you know, people will come up and they're happy for us. But

It's nice because people are generally just letting us have our time. That's nice. Paparazzi is a little crazy here and there, but it's cool. It's weird. Well, that's the thing is that it won't take it from me. It's very short-lived with the paparazzi. At first I was like, leave us alone. And now I'm like, hey.

Remember me? No, okay, cool, cool, cool. But it's nice that you guys can enjoy these little times. Even though you're tired, you're probably just like on Cloud 9 as well. Yeah. Yeah, like we're just having fun with it. We're joking about how wide. this is and how like sure it's like nonstop hours being awake and not eating a lot and this

and that but we're like finding the little joy in it and embracing it yeah that's one of my favorite sayings in the world is find the sacred so when things are tough or anything like goes you know like a flight's delayed or things that don't really matter in life or things that are hard I'm always like okay find the sacred where it's like oh I'm sorry your flights later you're just going to go partake in the miracle of flight and with Wi-Fi and have a glass of wine and get to New York. Like, you know, you got to find the sacred in certain things. And I'm wondering how you did that during the whole season because nobody can walk away

from this and say, that's pretty easy. No, no, definitely not. So I'm wondering how you found those like sacred moments in the tough times because obviously there were those. And how did you guys like, because you said, you said that on the finale about how you had incredible communication. I was just about to bring that up. What does that look like?

yeah we we pride ourselves in our communication skills for sure um you know watching it back obviously was not easy and there's been face times like if he was in california and i was back in canada or whatever wherever i was um you know yeah there was tears for sure and i'm like sometimes i was blindsided by some of the things that were that were shown but i would bring it up and he is so willing to like help me get through it and discuss it with me give me clarity and that's all I could ever want in a situation like that. Yeah, it wasn't easy and I certainly won't watch some parts back. Of course. But in a positive note, yeah, in a positive note, I mean, it was so amazing to watch our love story unfold. So it's what I find so hard about the happy

couple at the end is that they really don't showcase it enough because what people want to see is the drama or the sex or the this or the that. And you're like, oh, I would. wish our love story could have been shown a little bit more. Was there anything that wasn't shown? Well, I was going to say that that was obviously probably by design of the show. Of course. But there were some really special moments that we had that were not even touched upon. Like for one of the most recent ones was the morning after our overnight was her birthday.

And I got her chocolate cake and we had this like cake smearing party. Like in bed, we were just joking around having like the best. Like all over our faces. Like jumping on the bed like we're kids, like just the most fun, ridiculous stuff. But it was really important to us. And it's like something we'll never forget. But they don't show that. It's the other stuff.

Gotta fall in the storyline. I know. And that's what's so tough because at least you two have those memories. You should write them down or like write down the things that they didn't show because time goes on. I always wish I journaled more from that time. I did a little bit. But I wish I did more because the tough time seemed to stick with people. so much more than the good.

And if you just write down those little moments that you can look back on and be like, oh, actually remember that time and remember this. Because they do have to have a storyline. I mean, it's The Bachelor. It's drama. It's every, you know, and that's what, you know, makes us all tune in. Yeah, right, right. Also, that's what makes it really hard on couples as well.

In those times where you felt blindsided watching things, I have to say when I was the Bachelorette, I was even blindsided by things that I was watching, I'd go, wait, I said that and did I say that about this person or was like I thought I was talking about this or you know I thought I was talking about my mom at that point but they made it look like this and there's there's things that even Zach I'm sure you were blindsided by um what surprised you both the most well like on that same note same thread of the like oh I said that I there was like maybe one or two moments of this where I would listen to like one of the previews for like the rest the season or this and that and be like, I never said that sentence.

And I would panic, call the producer saying, I didn't say that sentence. What is, can you tell me? Can you ask post? What is this from? And they're like, well, it's actually from three separate episodes and they crafted it into one sentence. And I was like, you son of a bitch. But I get it.

It's like they want to draw you. But it also freaks us out because we're like, I said that. Like, was I drawn? And I didn't. And every single time you tune in, you go, okay, it's fine. Yeah. It's true. It's just, you know, they have to tease and they have to get people to, and it gets me in every time. I'm like, he said what? Like, I find myself being a fan of the show now, like forgetting I was a part of it sometimes. And I'm like, wait, wait. Okay, for a long time, I don't know how long, but a long time I've been using a humidifier for skin, sleep, overall wellness. I also like the noise. But the problem is traditional models are notorious for being super ugly. if we're being honest, moldy and impossible to maintain, and no thanks to that. So that's where the canopy humidifier comes in. Recommended by leading dermatologist, the canopy humidifier is a

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additional 10% off your canopy purchase. So hurry, your skin will thank you. I also want to like approach certain situations and conversations with you two around, you know, the sex and the fantasy suite because I know you probably know it has to happen and you have to talk about it and it comes up. But I know all too well how that went for me with, you know, every interview that's what they want to talk about. and nobody was really like compassionate or empathetic towards me about it. And I felt very shamed. And there was just like a lot. So I always want to treat every situation with obviously respect for you and you. And I just, to me, I know firsthand that you get so caught up in the moment in the show.

You have nobody that grounds you. You don't have your family, your friends to say, you got this and you can do this. And this is who you are. And you've got, you know, producers, which God bless. them. They are good at their job, but, you know, they create the storyline and they can create whatever they want. And they probably knew for sure what they were doing with that whole, you know, that's why they got Sean Lowe in there and they're trying to do this. And then they're like, oh, you should do that. You know, it's a whole thing. But with the strong communication that you two

have, how did you get through that part together? Because you have so much respect for Gabby, for all the girls. You guys, like, stand strong together. Oh, yeah. And I, think that's so freaking cool. But that's always going to be like a difficult challenging part of the show is the fantasy suites. It's the falling in love. It's all of it together. How did you two get through that part? Yeah, it goes back to the communication that we had because first and foremost, the most important thing before this TV show, before any of that is focusing on our relationship, making sure that she's okay. She knows my intention. She knows where my heart is. And like why I made those decisions well you know not all of them have been the right decision and I know that but where

my intention is and like my heart she knows where that is yeah that was the most important thing and it was still a conversation but like before anything else it was making sure that we're okay yeah which I appreciate and felt too but also like when you sign that NDA when you say hey I'm yeah I'm up for this challenge to go on the bachelor hopefully hopefully find love, you know that what's to come if you watch a show. And I've watched a few seasons, not all of them, but you know kind of what's to come in the fantasy sweet week. So I wasn't blind to that. And I think I was trying to be very understanding in that moment. And just kind of, yeah, I try my best. I want to like slow clap for you because I'm like everyone that goes on the show,

I'm like, I can never say, I'm never going to be the person that goes, you know what you signed for because you really don't. You really don't know how invested you're going to get what kind of emotions. You really don't believe, like, am I really going to fall in love with somebody? But on the same note, you really do have to understand the process, the format of the show, the production, the manipulation, the brainwashing, like, I could go on. And it really is a whole thing. So for you to be understanding of that and actually acknowledge, like, I signed this NDA, I can remember, like, initially in things on this contract where I was like, what the I'm doing that.

Like, let's go. But you do. And that's, that is part of it. And I think I always say this. Whenever I talk about the Bachelor franchise or couples that come out of it, it's the foundation is so tough to start on. It's a really tough foundation to start on is to be like, well, you did this. And I didn't know. And I was blindsided by this.

And you were falling in for more people. And what did I not do here that this person did? It's a really rocky foundation to start on. So if you can zoom out on that and look at it from a. a television perspective and say this is the weird way we found each other and we're going to be each other's rock through that nothing else matters exactly yeah and like i've said before and other interviews too like i think that communication a is so important in a relationship builds an amazing foundation but also loyalty and we had that with each other yes the show is

very unconventional but we got through it and we came out stronger and that's all yeah I could have ever asked for. That's the best is when you can come out stronger from it and be like it's us against the world or the trolls or the online or the whatever, that's, I mean, it's just you already have a really solid foundation compared to a lot of couples coming out of that. And maybe I'm, I don't know. I just, that's how I feel like I'm, I'm an energy reader. That's what I claim to be now.

But I feel that, like I feel like you really do have that together. And speaking of the show being unconventional and all the things. people obviously are going to shit on you for everything you do because you were The Bachelor. But people got so upset that why didn't you let Gabby go before, you know, like, why didn't you tell her before? And I'm like yelling at people in my head because it's the format of the show. You probably didn't really have a choice in what I loved. I wanted the same thing. I wanted to send Nick home before he was about to get down on one knee and go through the whole thing.

I was like, I don't want to put him through that. And they got me because they said, and now I see it. They said, let him have a voice. Let him have that time. People will be rooting for him. People need to see that side of him. That's the format of the show. That's why people tune in.

You know, they did it a couple seasons where like Andy got to go, Nick again, to Nick and like let him go before. And it's just like, it's just the format of the show. Is that how it was for you with Gabby being. your runner up were you like I would really like to actually like because you knew you said when you saw her in your last chance date so was it like okay Zach well this is the format of the show and like let her have her moment well like first and foremost and we've always talked about this and this is something that I want is always honesty and beautiful reality TV Gabby's last chance date was first yeah and then I saw Katie so then they swapped it

They swapped it because it's, that's that dramatic effect. But like, I want that to be out there. They did that to me too, yeah. Yeah. Because then that, the whole thing right now is like the timeline doesn't make sense. The timeline will never make sense. And I'm like, that's what editing does. It doesn't make sense.

But, you know, for that, like when I saw Katie at that last chance day, like I, you know, leading up to this point, as you know, your mind is racing a million miles an hour. You're like, an engagement's right around the corner. I want to make the right decision because, you know, I take engagement so seriously. And I, it's a limited time, this and that. And I kind of just let myself go. And I was like, where does my heart take me? And I looked at her eyes and I was like, that's my wife.

Like that's the future mother of my children. And I can't wait for that. Can't lose her. Don't want to lose her. And I told people that day. And they're like, I don't know what I can say. But it's like, keep your mouth shut. Think about it.

Think about it. Don't make any rash decisions, which I agree with. Like don't like take all the time, think about it, process it. And then that next, you know, that I did, I woke up the next morning the morning at the engagement. I was like, yeah, just feeling stronger than ever. Yeah. So then, yeah, I understand the criticism of like, why in the show does he not ask her or tell her the night before? Well, it's, it's the platform, but it's also I don't have all the say in the world.

Right. No, in fact, you have very little say. There is a lot of people running that show. and I always encourage people that are listening, even though I feel like I have the most supportive listeners on planet Earth. I always say to people, like, you have to have even a tiny bit of compassion for it because it is TV. And I think a lot of people forget that.

People always think of you as characters, not human beings. And people forget that it is a TV show and that editing is a real thing. I'd do it on the podcast. And it's to have people be on their toes. If you went and sent her home, people would be like, you didn't give her a chance. like you didn't like you couldn't have done anything right in that moment um and something that I remember talking to a therapist and I hope you guys use and abuse the therapist that they give

you or if they do um because she said she was talking to Sean who I got engaged to and he was like I just really need like her to be reassuring to me at all times because I've been questioning this the whole time and I'm like I also need to be reassured because I've been going through hell I haven't had like my mind has been so confused i need reassurance too that you're you know going to be strong for me so how do you two give each other reassurance in the relationship um that like you're going to get through it all we're an absolute team like and it's weird it's like we didn't even like really talk about it or make some game plan it's like this natural feeling of like we're going to make anything work we're going to figure it out as hard as it is

Like, we've already been put through the ringer in some top-ass conversations. Absolutely. Always. It's like, whenever I'm feeling down or I, you know, if something like really does bog me down, whether it's online or people's, you know, opinions or whatever, she's always there to pick me up. Like, she has, like, the wisest words ever. She reminds me, like, of the things that matter most and it's like your family and the

ones you love most. And then if I, you know, when I see you like you down, I'm always there and I always want you to feel good. check in on each other and make sure we're okay that's sweet as help canadians got to love them right i know canadians are the freak at best i am obviously biased but are we cheers to that i mean cheers yeah cheers to canadians jack you got a good one you got a good one great one um but you do you face a lot of criticism with you know online and people just i shit on you for god's sake when you were picked as the bachelor oh i remember i knew i would eat my words

I knew it because it wasn't your fault, though. It was nobody gave you a good enough, not edit. You had a good at it. You didn't, yeah, you didn't have enough of a platform, enough of like time shown for you to shine. And usually when we pick our bachelors or bachelors, it's because the world is rooting for them after a massive heartbreak and we've gotten to know them so well. And it just like, it was kind of random. So I was kind of, I have owe you an apology, which I did online. or in your DMs, but I want to say to the world, I am so sorry because I was just like,

what, why? And now I'm like, yeah, I know why. I get it now. But that's, and the producers told me that they were like, you'll see why. Like, he's charming and he's really funny. And he's got a great personality and he's got a good family. They really sold you. And then you sold yourself.

So, yeah, I appreciate that. I, thank you for reaching out and about that because it means a lot, you know, when you're someone very prominent and, you know, like, um, there's so. many negative you know comments and opinions so hard on you so i haven't seen i even want to go into that was it bad because he had reached out to me like the day before saying hey man i got your back like i'll support you and then he drops his phone number and i and i just like saw it and i was like oh that's great the next day i just see in yahoo news or whatever slam zack chowcrow i'm quitting this or he's so this and i was like was that just like a pity reach out or like because it

kind of hurt like i don't i don't i've never met him and i was like it's kind of an asshole move yeah Maybe he didn't mean to. Maybe something he said got taken out of context. I don't listen to his stuff. Yeah. But from what I could see, it looked a little harsh. It was harsh. It was harsh.

And I was like, oh, that's not very nice. Because you are, once you're in, like, you guys are family now. Yeah. And he should be coming from a lead. This week's off the vine is brought to you by progressive insurance. Most of you listening right now, you're multitasking. While you're listening to me talk, you might be driving, cleaning, exercising, grocery shopping. but if you're not in some kind of moving vehicle, there is something else you can be doing right now.

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surveyed who saved with Progressive between June 2021 and May 2022. Potential savings will vary and discounts not available in all states and situations. I have to troll you for a second, though. Yeah, please say it. But it's in a goofy fun way. Please. You have no idea how often my producer and I quote, Mourn and Bailen.

Do you remember this? Oh, my. Morning. You couldn't remember a single girl's name. Okay, that was... I was there. I was live in the audience and I was like... Well, I could also paint the picture of why,

but it's not going to help. But yes, the morning, Baylon. What was her name was Bailey, right? And then she's like, don't forget it. And then it can't, in the morning or something. Like, that was such a high stress situation for you. So I get that. I probably would, nobody would have remembered name.

They did that on purpose. Nobody remembers anybody's name. Even the ones that stand out, I would be like, like, I think I remember two guys' names when they came out of the limo. And then you're like, what did I just go through? And you were thrown, you didn't know that was going to happen. Zero. And people were like, oh, he had.

had to have some idea. I didn't even know. It was still a 95% chance that I was going to be Bachelor. They kept telling me to the day of that AFR announcement that, dude, they've changed it day of. Don't get too excited. So I'm in my own head. So they mess with my own head. They love doing that. I was so scared on stage. I remember blabbering to Jesse about something. He asked me a question. I'm not recognizing it's live TV or I'm panicking because it is. And he just like cuts me off mid-sentence. He's like, right after that, and I'm mid-sentence. I'm like, this is the hottest start of any bachelor. Like, I can't even get sentences out. I can't remember names. I was worried for you in that moment. I was like, uh-oh. How's he going to do this? But then I thought

about the high stress situation. And I was like, well, I guess anyone would panic in that moment. And plus, you had me in the crowd. Do you remember? I was like, hey, Zach, don't fuck up. And you're like, thanks. I was like, hey, nice to meet you two. I'm the worst. But we say in our group chat for the podcast, every morning we go, Morning Baylon. So what's the plan? We say it every single day in our group chat. And I would just like to thank you for giving us that kind of content.

You're welcome. Yeah. That's so funny. Alicia's died. We literally, she said it this morning. Morning Baylon. We woke up and she was like, morning, Baylon. I was like, morning, bailin.

Like, it's become part of our. It's a routine. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I do want to know this. So you know how Gabby obviously had doubts. her gut told her and obviously that goes to show that you were probably like on that last chance date not you know feeling it the same but did you know that you were getting engaged katy

were you like did you did you like did you guys give each other a little sign before or do anything where you're like it's you i was kind of going through it i mean at the two month mark i was like enough's enough i'm sorry i'm sick of this shit truly i'm like i want my man i want to get out here and I want to start life. But I think I expressed to you at that time when it was, like, getting quite difficult for me, I was like, I am having a tough time. And he's like, he reassured me. And I was like, okay, maybe this is me at the end, but still in the back of your head.

You don't know. And I've watched the show before. So I'm like, okay, like, yes, this feels good, but, like, don't have any expectations, obviously. And you've got to set her up where you were like, it was almost sounding like he wasn't. dirty here. You did. I told you why, but. Wait, why? Well, it's the people we can't talk about. I know. The hell does that be? You do this one last thing for us then you can enjoy your engagement. Yeah, they did that to me too. I had to say, uh, I had to say to my, about to be fiancee, I had to say, I made mistakes and like a lot of mistakes. And then I was like acting like I wasn't going to pick him. And he was like, really, have you not done enough right now? But yeah, it is part of it. But anyways. So you, you had no idea. Well, you had a little idea, but I was confident in our relationship and what we had.

And I was also confident as a woman. Yeah. And what I could offer someone. Yeah. And what I could offer him specifically. Yeah. And I was just like hoping that that was enough. Yeah.

And then you walked around and saw the grin on my face and I couldn't hide it. Yeah. I was like, it's my wife walking up to me right now. And also, also I haven't said this yet, which I don't even know if I'm allowed to. but I come on the corner and I'm in the sand like there's like a little bit of a mat but like I'm like looking down to like

make sure I don't eat shit and I see heel prints in the sand so oh a clear sign a clear sign oh nobody raced to the sand and the smile on his face Jesse was also super excited he was super excited

he was like Gabby's like Gabby he says the whisper when he's like feeling uncomfortable ghost is good luck and I'm like oh my gosh be more obvious but I like it I think as viewers and I wonder if you see this back as viewers we were always like it's Katie like so yeah like my face so I got I got in a lot of flack or a lot of like funny memes about like my facial reactions because I'm really bad at hiding my emotion she knows to be like if I'm feeling bummed or if I'm feeling off she knows it immediate she's like babe what's up you were

We like to call that a green flag. That's amazing. Yeah. Oh, thank you. And so it's funny because while watching it back, I would, you know, start to pick that up. And, you know, because the memes pointed out the sad face I'd have. But every time I looked at Katie and sometimes I just didn't even recognize it, like, everything just was uplifting more.

Like, I had the biggest grin on my face. And I even saw it, like, at the proposal, like, I was holding myself back from crying up there. I was about to. Oh, you were a little teary. I was too. I was like, but it was just, I don't know, I could just see it after the fact, because you're in your head so much in the moment. You also have 30 beautiful women and you had an incredible final four. Like, those are, which is a testament to you.

And I was actually going to ask because you are so close with all the girls. Could you all be friends at some point? Because, yeah, I mean, who knows what the future holds? But you know what? I love my friendships with the women that I do have. Gabby is one of my closest friends. Same with Ariel. Like we talk all the time, text, face time. And we really support each other and uplift one another. And I think in an environment, in a situation, experience like that, you need to do that. And yeah, we empower each other. And I'm super grateful for those women. Like, I love that so much because

that was the same as when I was on The Bachelor, me, Becca, and Whitney were the final three. And we were like, like, they were heartbroken when I got sent home third. Like, they were like, and like we would, we were all in group chats. We ended up being friends with Chris and like all these things because we were so supportive of each other that we were like, wait, who are we actually here for? Like, we're all such solid friends. But Gabby just, and again, I don't know if this is for TV or it was like, you know, for people to be rooting for her. if they're going to do back-to-back bachelor's seasons

and they're, like, setting her up. But she just didn't seem over it. But I was like, but that happens on every season. You know what I mean? Like, you could be completely over. I was completely over Chris Souls. But when it was women tell all,

I'm like, they just really hurt me. Like, I just like, I'm not saying that she was faking it, but I'm just saying, have you talked to her about that? Are you able to comfort her through that? Or is that weird?

Yeah, we try to comfort each other in situations. I think that last episode, like the Fantasy Sweet Week episode, that was tough on each and every one of us, Ariel, Gabby, and I. And, you know, we try to talk through it the best we can. Like, hey, how do you feel about this? I just want, you know, if you need to talk to me, like, I'm here for you. And we always have that support for one another. And Ariel is amazing too.

She is like the mother hen, I would like to say. And I think she should be a therapist because she is incredible. I'd like her to be my therapist. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I tell her that all the time. She's like, no, no. I'm like, no.

So you're serious. So you do a better job than my actual therapist. Sorry. Yeah. But, um, yeah, very, very lucky to have those women. And, uh, yeah, they're great. And I can't speak on behalf of Gabby and what she feels. But, hey, that was a, that was a hard time for her.

And that was on national television. Yeah. Absolutely. Hey, if she needs to let it out, air it out. Talk to Zach about, hey, what the heck happened? Why did you do this, this, and that? I get that, and I support her. Is she the best?

I love you guys. I love you guys. I'm, like, rooting for you so hard. Please don't ever break up. I will not believe in love. That's really cool. It's just so, like, because really one of my favorite parts of being a part of that show was the friendships I made. It really was.

And it's a really special thing that you can't have with anyone else, except for a handful of people that, you know, I wanted to know if after going. through all of that. Did you have a little more empathy for what Rachel went through and from her time as the Bachelorette? A thousand percent. I have empathy for all previous leads. Because there has never, this is great wine, by the way. Shout it to Spade and Sparrow. You have more, yeah, for all the leads. Because it's like, you know, there hasn't been one season where everyone has made the right decision or done everything the right way. There's literally no right way. And

people are very critical and i completely see why because they're not in it so like with like rachel absolutely i totally understand the pressure and sometimes you just make the decision that sounds right at the moment and then you can always look back and be like i did mess up like i shouldn't have done things different clayton for example you know he's someone that you know reached out to support me and like encourage me during the negativity um and he's one where it's like i mean you know the guy went through his hardships and of his decisions but like but like it doesn't define who he is as a person you know he made a mistake in a very tough boiling point moment and you can't like you can't completely fault someone or make huge character claims about single

decisions um so i have you know the utmost respect for everyone that that i've been put in those those positions obviously if there's good intent unless you're an asshole there's a few there's a few there's a few i have a couple of my money yeah me too um It is interesting, though, because, and that is something that, you know, people always think fantasy suites, but that's actually a time where you got to see Rachel in a way where you're like, oh, you know what we don't align. And this is not how I thought I felt. And that is part of what the fantasy suites are for, is to have no cameras, to see the real thing. Is there any kind of confession you have for me? Something embarrassing.

I always make my guest confess on this podcast. Something embarrassing that happened either in the fantasy suite or in your time together as a couple where you're like oh my god nobody knows this this is so embarrassing i think kind of embarrassing for me um was our first overnight the one in the museum so we were in the tent together and we were you know at this time it's four in the morning four 30 when producers leave but you know there's cameras still like all set up and it's like this really cool opportunity to really like talk and get to know each other more and we really did up to that point but it was 4.30 in the morning. You know how long

those days are. And we're laying in like these cots staring up and she's talking to me about something. And all of a sudden, she just hears me start to snore mid-conversation. He fell asleep while I was talking to him. Because I was just

dead tired. Yeah. Yeah. It did the ringer. Like, yeah. It makes sense. And I was like, I haven't snored in years. Why was I snoring that night? And I was so embarrassed. And I'm like literally up. I'm like, oh, this. is over. Oh, I got up. This is done.

It's not even bad. I thought you're going to be like, and I just like ripped so many farts in my sleep. Like, I thought that's what you're going to say. No, no farts. No,

at that point. At that point. Yeah. Now, are you on the level now where you're like, we're comfortable. We're comfortable, but we're not gross about it. Yeah.

Like, you don't poop at the door open. We're not like Dutch avon in each other. Okay, okay. No, catch ovens. Maybe tonight. You want it? Maybe I'll Dutch have me. Damn, man.

You're freaky. You're freaky. Let your freak flag fly, Katie. We got to go. Let's come. He's turned on by it. God, you guys are so cute. It's annoying.

Literally, he's getting turned on by you talking about Dutch ovens. This is amazing. I am genuinely, like, so happy for the two of you. There's people, you know, that come out of this that I'm like, I have feelings about or I've, I genuinely, like, rooting for you both. I'm here for you, no matter what, because I really feel like I love being there for people that have gone through this because I'm like, dude, there's nothing like it. And no one can relate.

And I just, I'm all ears if you ever need anything. And plus, we're like honorary sisters now because you're Canadian. And we spell each other, our name's the same. We do? Yeah, Caitlin, K-A-I-T-L-Y-N. Wait, your full name is Caitlin K-I-T-L-L-Y-N? We are two Caitlin's from Canadian who spell our names the same way. And our initials are the same, KB.

Did you notice, or you probably didn't. I don't know if I... Oh, what? Yeah, KB. Oh, my gosh. She DMs me and doesn't even know my last name. No, I didn't think... Of course I'm going to be the last name, but I didn't put it together that we were both KB's.

And at first I thought you said KD, because my middle name's Dawn. And I was like, no, no, no, no. KB. Yeah, okay, I got it. I got it. Yeah. Did we just become best friends? Okay, one thing before I let you go is I always play quick games with people.

Cool. We love games. Keep the lighthearted. And it's not the like newly wed game because I feel like everyone probably played that with you. But you both live in the same city. You said you're moving in together. First of all, who's moving where? Are you guys going to get a place together?

Because you've just got a place. Was that real? That was actually my home at the time. But we're actually going to move into a different place in the summer together. Okay. Okay. So we have to do just like some really simple questions before you move in together. Okay.

I already know the first question. dog or cat dog did you say it dog absolutely not a hesitation let's get a dog dog literally my next question was farting or no farting around each other farting farting yeah farting yeah but not forcing

I mean yeah like if one happens you're not pushing about like Alicia last yeah damn oh sorry I have to damn it's become a running joke on this podcast that I call her out for everything and it's also a running joke that I'm going to fire her every podcast. I'm like, you're fired.

Okay. I'm recording. You're like, I'm out of here, not doing you any more favors. Okay. Who's better cook, Katie or Zach? Both of us. We cook different things. That's the thing. Different proteins. I'm really good at salmon. He's good at chicken steak and burgers and stuff. I have like a little bit more of an unhealthy palate. Yeah. An unhealthy palette. She's very health-conscious. I love it. I'm the worst. Okay. Country or pop?

country yeah for sure would it annoy you if he left the seat up he has done that oh does it annoy you yeah yeah wait does it actually annoy you that quickly though well like I mean it depends because if you're in the dark would you rather have it like pee on the seat and then you sit down what's worse pee on the seat or up they're both equally bad because if you leave the seat up and it's dark and I go to sit down and I follow that toilet bowl I'm gonna hate you then if I sit in pee I'm also gonna hate you yeah fair and then you like you like put your pants up and it's like wet yeah yeah and then you're like wow i'm just marinating and pee cool cool perfect word for that cool marinating and piss

um laundry and dishes are we clean are we organized oh you know what i actually like i get in these moods where i like cleaning like you saw it when you were at my place like i like cleaning i like you've good aesthetic too by the way thank you yeah was that art department or was that you Oh, wait, are you talking about my home tax? Oh, that was Airbnb. Oh. Yeah, my family doesn't live in Austin. Like, they really wanted me to have it in Kingston because that's where I'm from.

Got it. Nighttime or morning bailant time. Oh, okay, well, these are opposite views. I don't laugh. I said morning Baylon. Me slapper. Okay. Anyways, I'm nighttime.

Okay. I'm a night owl for sure. I don't mind either, but I'm okay when I wake up in the morning. I'm pretty spry. She's not a morning person at all. Oh, I grow warrants. And I try to like, do not trust it. I'm trying to get her kind of like, hey, babe.

Oh, I hate it. I'm like, oh yeah, I'm like, don't talk to me. Don't touch me. Yeah. Jason has now, this is a really sweet thing that he does because he's, he wakes up and his brain goes, let's talk about work, business, money. And I'm like, ah. So I've told them like, I can't do it.

I wake up. I do red light. I do meditation. I do a gratitude five minutes. Oh, that's amazing. I like cuddle my dogs. And then I like slowly get up. I have coffee, and then I look at my phone.

And so now when he gets up, instead of, I swear to God, he does a to-do list for me of, like, work stuff in my text, I'm like, I can't. So now he just brings me a coffee and doesn't say anything. That's what I started to do on these. And it eases it into the rest. On our happy couple days, I would just like, I'd be up in the kitchen, letting your sleep, let her naturally wake up and then bring their coffee. Yeah, he's so great. I would wake up, he'd have breakfast, he'd have coffee. Don't lose that.

Don't just do the hundred. doing phase shit and then let us I will cry if you guys so considerate so thoughtful so selfless like I could not have met a better man truly I love you it's cute I love it

I'm like I guess I'm like please keep this please keep this um okay ketchup or ranch ooh ketchup ranch yeah that's very American Canadian there Friends or Seinfeld Friends

Seinfeld Oh Did you have, did you see my pivot reference? Yes, I died. Yes, I live for it. Me too. I did catch the, I didn't remember until you just said that now. And I was like, yes, I was like, pivot.

Yeah, yeah, I love friends. And also one of my producer with me. Who was yours? Pisa. Okay, I love her. You know the moment when Ross goes, I'm fine. Yeah. I'm fine.

Literally, that was me the whole season. I was like, I'm not okay. But I'm going to say I'm fine. I'm fine. Like drinking your margarita? Yeah. Yeah. That's amazing.

Okay. And last one, date night in or date night out? I like date night out. Yeah. We've only had date night in. That's fair. Last night was our first ever out, and we were just so exhausted from everything that we just did dinner and walked. But out.

We want to go out in Austin together. Have our friends meet. Yeah. That's the cool. We love adventures, too. That's so fun. It's coming from two people that haven't really been on any adventures. Yeah, none.

So now you're moving in together, and then what is next? Do you talk about that? Are you like, we're just going to go one step at a time? Because I'm not going to be the girl that asks you if you have a date. No. I mean, we talk about the future for sure because, like, you know, family is important to us. So we have talked about, you know, kind of a rough idea when we'd like to get married and how we'd like to do it. But we also talked about, you know, starting a family after that and a rough time.

But no, nothing concrete. What about on a beach? Beach wedding. Small and intimate. We don't want this massive debacle. So, I want a freaking elope. I'm so sick of, I tried to wedding plan and I was like, no, this ain't right? Yeah.

I'm totally down with a looping. Oh my gosh. I'm so excited. I am too. Yeah, I'm actually, I'm, I'm always, very excited. Do you get to relax after this? This is our last thing. Fini.

And then we're done for the night. Get the fuck out, guys. Go. Go have sex and dutch up any. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. Usually, we always start the podcast with a cheers and we end with a chug. So, okay.

It's time to shit. Yeah, I know. I'm not a good chugger. I'm not either, especially with God. You need to get some more. Yeah, I'm out. I'm out. Uh-oh.

Yeah, I'm like a sip. Okay, well, let's just chug the rest. I'm Caitlin Bristow. Your session is now ending. Thanks for joining us for this week's great therapy. Don't forget to rate, review, and follow on your favorite podcast platform. And tune in Thursday for your next session. You think Vanderpump Rules is messy now?

It's always been messy. I'm Jacks Taylor, the OG Pump Rules villain. And I'm Brittany Cartwright, wife of the OG villain. And we've got a new podcast when reality hits. We'll definitely be talking about Vanderpump Rules, past and present, and oh my, scandumall. And you'll get a look at what life is like for us now as we figure out marriage and parenthood. Little Cruzy. And friendships.

feuds. It's our real reality with and without cameras. And sometimes with special guests like our celebrity friends, former castmates, and other veterans of reality TV. So listen to and follow when reality hits with us, Jacks Taylor and Brittany Cartwright. At Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.