Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Hannah Berner: Comedy, Confidence, and Cults

Episode Date: May 23, 2023

Comedian, former Bravo star, and Kaitlyn’s biggest music fan, Hannah Berner, is on the mic with KB IRL for the first time! She may have goofed it last time they were supposed to podcast, but this time she showed up and is ready to talk everything from imposter syndrome to married life to why men are scared of witches. And, the two of them pretty much have a business plan down for their commune/cult, so if you’re interested please DM us - please and thank you! Hannah and KB are also joined by two very special and somewhat unexpected guests who have a chance to get in on the fun. Hannah shares her candid answer when people ask if she’s having kids soon, and gives her thoughts on roasting both Kaitlyn’s wedding and Bachelor Nation as a whole. Stay tuned for some more Hannah next week! Thank you to our sponsors! Check out these deals for the Vinos: MUDWTR - Go to mudwtr.com/otv to support the show and use code OTV for 15% off THIRDLOVE - Visit ThirdLove.com to find your fit and shop their bestselling bras, and get $15 off your first purchase. ANGI - Your home for everything home.  PROGRESSIVE - Quote today at Progressive.com to try the Name Your Price® tool for yourself, and join the over 29 million drivers who trust Progressive. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Okay, let's talk about the original enemies to lovers story. Before all of our reality TV couples, before the rom-coms, we binge, there was Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in pride and prejudice. And Audible has just dropped a brand new original that will have you completely hooked, I am. It's not just any audiobook. This is a full cast performance. So Marisa Abella, you might know her from industry, brings Elizabeth Bennett to life.

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So whether it's your first time experiencing Pride and Prejudice or you've read it a million times, you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again. So go listen to Pride and Prejudice now at audible.ca slash Jane Austen. This episode of Off the Vine is brought to you by Mudwater. Mudwater is a coffee alternative and it only has a fraction of caffeine as a cup of coffee. Each ingredient was added for a purpose and together they really do taste so good. Go to MUDWTR.com slash OTV to support the show. and use code OTV for 15% off.

That's M-U-D-W-T-R.com. Thirdlove, visit thirdlove.com to find your fit and shop their best-selling bras, plus get $15 off your first purchase, Angie, your home for everything home, and Progressive. Quote today at Progressive.com to try the name your price tool for yourself and join the over 29 million drivers who trust Progressive. Welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow.

And today's guest is a comedian and former Bravo star Hannah Burner. And not one, but two, surprise guests. So enjoy. You know that, like, I'm your biggest music fan. What? No. I briefly told you that in Nashville. Yeah, but you aren't really.

No, like, I would play your, I get, like, addicted to songs. And that was one of them? Your song was one of them I put on, it was during COVID, right? Yeah. Yeah, I would be, like, brushing my teeth. Nothing was going to. to happen that day and I was like sometimes I'm insecure yes it was so good I have like the most imposter syndrome ever when it comes to singing I feel like I I should have imposter syndrome like

but I am at dancing right no yeah dancing I'm like duh but singing I'm like I'm like a fucking fraud I'm such a fraud but think of all those Hollywood people back in the day that got put into like something and they couldn't dance or they couldn't sing and they were like you need to and then by the end they were like a triple threat yeah anyways people who usually our childhood actors can sing yeah that's what we've learned and what i'm getting at is because we were saying before we started recording that i was going to put out more music and then i was like well i don't have imposter syndrome when i dance but i do when i sing because i'm in nashville everyone's better than everyone true and people can get snooty with music and they have to be like you have to

do these things to be considered a musician well and i feel like i'm pissing people off and they're like this bitch goes on one reality show like let's be honest it's kind of fun pissing people off if i'm being honest okay i'm kately's number one like singing fan like i'm a fan girlie of her music people mention her in the bachelor and dancing with the stars and i'm like but have you heard have you heard if i'm being honest though because i one thing about me and new we'll tell it like it is yeah straight up straight up i felt so like stupid i felt imposter syndrome saying straight up But like, straight up, actually, straight up. Do you know it's been like three years since we podcasted?

We've never podcasted in person before. Only Zoom? And then we tried and I forgot the date and fucked it up. You did fuck. You, my girlfriend and I always say, you goofed it. You goofed it. Wait, that is what happened. I was like on a plane.

I was like, what time are you coming over? You produced was like, where are you? And I was like, oh, you mean next week? And she's like, absolutely not. But it was one of those things where I like, you know when the months are ending and then starting? Yeah. Like a new week, I like got confused. Yeah, that's fair.

Like basic, dyslexic type of where's the next week start and end in my calendar? So I apologize. And I was like, I'm never going to be able to podcast her again. Yeah, right. I was like so thirsty for you to go. No, you guys messaged me. You were like, well, do you want to go up for dinner tonight? And I was like, I'm like, I just, I'm still on a plane.

It's like, so you're not turning around is what you're saying. You're not, but you made up for it. You brought me champagne. Thank you, babe. And that is all you need to do. No, I felt bad, but yeah. I actually forgot you did that. Well, now we're mad again.

You know what, thanks for bringing me out. But I actually, I know why I, I've goofed because I was getting you back because you beat me in beer pong, which we, I still am upset about. We really, and we beat Paige, too, I think. And you beat Paige. I remember, I was trying to give Paige advice. I was like, this is what they did to me. She's going to pretend like she can't play. She's a, she's a fox.

she's solid and she's going to try to trick you she's going to make little jokes on the side and then her husband's I mean her boyfriend's going to be in the back you know and he's like a hockey player he was telling you you know his own strategies I die laughing every time people call him a hockey player because I swear like once in high school he like he like plays on a beer league team and he played in high school and I'm like what and I swear that was like how he got me he's like she's Canadian I'll tell her I played hockey I skated on Central Park once at Rockapelso Center Yeah

He was like We didn't even have a stick He just had a puck He looks like a hockey bro Though like he has the flow And he has kind of that upstate accent Totally No that's I think why I was so turned on

Like when I first started flirting with him I was like okay I could get down with this He kind of reminds you of like a Canadian hockey player Yeah he reminds you of your people But hockey guys It's good he's not like But I think the better you are at hockey The more Chlamydia you have

110% I dated a pro hockey player and then you know but i do think he was one of the like the one percentage that wasn't a douche yeah well my mom went to a school upstate and the one thing she told me when i went to university wisconsin was like have fun with athletes but like stay away from the hockey guys she's like they're weirdly older than everyone else because they go to these colleges like they go to junior college so they're like 26 and everyone else is like 19 interesting they have cTE raising awareness for and then no teeth and scd is and why do i think it's

hot when guys don't have teeth no it is hot they've seen some shit they've been through some they look like they could take a punch yeah like to walk around missing teeth yeah like I pay a lot of money to fix mine just when they're fine yeah and the fact that they could break out in a fight at any time is just very animalistic and yeah yeah I've turned all the way on imagine fighting while on ice gates how do they make it look hot I don't know but it's it's actually kind of funny when you really watch it because it's like they know they're not actually fighting we're just doing this to look cool like when he throws his thing down and I'm like okay it's a little dramatic then drop the gloves it's basically the real housewives of sports is hockey

do you know I've never been a bravo gal I love that for you well I don't because now that I met you and now that I'm like the vanderpump shit going on I'm like man I have missed out on good TV it is great TV I started like I loved vanderpump and then I fell into doing the bachelor stuff but I had to stop watching The Bachelor because it was too time consuming. It's so exhausted. Two hours each night and I remember just feeling like this, I would get addicted to it. Yeah, it does take up a lot of your time. I had to go cold turkey.

I still do it and then I have to podcast about it. And then when they do the finale, they're like, welcome to the three hour finale and I'm like, sick. Thank God you like didn't have a completely horrible experience on the show because like I can't even watch reality TV anymore. Yeah. I well I had a pretty bad experience yeah but you're but you're able to yeah and I'm able to watch now but I couldn't watch for years okay yeah I think I will get back to watching eventually because I did love it do you know I actually stopped after weren't you and another girl chosen to be the bet yes that's when I stopped because I was so mad about it so you didn't watch my season I watched I I fell in love with you the season before I do have to say of all the seasons I watched like six or seven your charisma like I connected with more than anyone. Like I was like, she's a goofy girlie.

I am a goofy girl. But then the fact that they didn't choose one of you and they made you compete for it, I thought this is misogynistic. It was. This is bullshit. And the two you looked confused and like did not want to go against each other. And I got so mad that I stopped watching. I was so uncomfy up there with her because I was like, but I love you.

No, I could tell. But then I won. So I was like, well, I guess I'm the better woman. That was a good thing they did that. Well, I guess I'm the better wife. And now she's married with two kids and I'm still. Trying on my second engagement. No, yeah, I just, it's entertaining to a point, and then sometimes reality TV just gets too

misogynistic for me that I'm like, I can't play with these, like, traditional roles. Was Summerhouse like that? Summerhouse was annoying in that, like. Are you still under contract? No. Well, I mean, I can't really talk about it, but in general, it was like guys and girls, and, you know, they always want to put you in kind of a role. Yeah.

And each season, they would kind of try to change who you are. So it was unpredictable every time you're like, who are you going to make me this time? Literally. And I also, I'm multifaceted. Like they weren't like, either you're like the hot girl or the funny girl or the sad girl. You're like, I'm all of those. I was like, I'm everything. I'm depressed.

I'm annoying. I'm fun. Like, I can be all of it. That's me. And I think. That's why you connected to me because that's me. Literally. One second she's crying.

Once second she's laughing. Yeah. And sometimes reality TV can oversimplify stuff. I think they think the audience is dumber than they are. Yes. And they will make it so simple that I'm like, first of all, it's not happen. A lot of the audiences don't know, but. True.

But like I feel like sometimes they make it so black and white when it's so much more gray and so much more interesting. I agree. I always think that with Bachelor 2 out. It's so black and white. It's the same format all the time. Yes. They're trying. Did you see they're doing the like Golden Years Bachelor where it's old people?

I love that. Yeah. So I'm like, there you go. You switched it up. I'm going to watch. I will watch that. But I'm sick of the same old format, which I think a lot of people are as well. Yeah.

I want shows to break the fourth wall more. Yes. That's what The Bachelor is missing. So what happens with shows, as people who've experienced it, once it's like four or five seasons in with the same cast, we're not who we were and we started. Now we're reality TV people. Right. Like, so we fight about things going on with the show.

Right. Like who's getting more screen time? Like, someone said this on a podcast. Yeah. Like, that's what people are fighting about, the edits. Yeah. So then when they try to explain that it's something else to the audience, the audience is confused, You feel duped.

Yeah. And it's like, let's show what we're really fighting about. It's true. Maybe you should go into producing. Maybe. Well, I kind of started just producing myself on TikTok. Oh, well, you know what? Do that.

I wouldn't do that. You're like, why would I do all of that for everybody else but I can do it for myself? Well, I know I would love in the future getting involved, maybe like a production company, like doing something. Do you know a psychic told me that I should start a production company? Maybe this is like supposed to happen and we're supposed to start a production company. I mean, I can see that for both. of us. I could too. Because I do love like collaborating with people. I love

like connecting like minded people. I did want to do some kind of like podcast women's festival or something. Oh what a great idea. What a great idea. Yeah. Like because we have like different audiences but the same. That's true. Like they would love each other if they met. Yes. Yes. Like they would if they met at our

conference. They start taking shots. Whatever we want to call it. Conference. Conference is very formal. That didn't sound right at all when it came out. But a cult also didn't sound right. It sounds like we're starting a cult. We have a conference. Like a, what is it? A colony. A commune.

The commune. And we're all wearing white and chanting. Is that weird? But we would laugh at the fact that we're doing that. There definitely has to be a psychic there. It has to be a psychic. Maybe an energy healer. Yes. Chakras. Okay. Are you looking for Summers It bra?

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to speak to an advisor, free of charge. But MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with Eye Gaming, Ontario. Do you think Matt Rife is funny? Yeah. He hates that whole, like, like anything crystals.

Well, because men are scared to think out of the box okay thank you for saying that because i've been thinking about i'm like why is he so weird about it and then i realized because he's scared because we are witchy and we can do shit to no it's because they want to be in control it's like why men don't like horoscopes but they'll like yeah but i always say i'm like you play fancy football that's literally the same thing we're just predicting what's happening next week yeah and and you're welcome and if you knew astrology you would know that your team would have sucked because tom brady's wouldn't have matched You just, I would have known.

Yeah. Because we have intuition. You know, guys don't like things they can't comprehend. And if women are the ones saying it, they could easily be like, they're crazy. Oh, that's so true. But I feel like Matt, give him a couple days. He'll get into it. If he learns he could, like, meet girls from it, he'll get into it.

Well, I, like, dug into him, like, how he kind of manifested the life he's in right now. He fully did. So I'm like, well, you kind of have to believe in something then. And he was against me. Also, no one, is that genetically beautiful without? Is he genetically beautiful? Because he got new teeth. He told me that.

Good for him. I know. Wait, he's so L.A. He's so L.A. See, he just needs like a couple more months and he'll be into astrology. Yeah, no, literally. Because he started with the veneers and the next place to go. The next step is a psychic.

To go to a psychic and then believe in astrology. It's so funny because my friend who started reality TV hit me up. And my first advice to her, I was like, okay, you're going to have to get a therapist, an astrologer, and a psychic. Yeah, yeah. Because you're going to feel so out of control with your life that it's the only thing that's going to make you feel like a little bit like there's hope, which is so dark. But you're looking at a crazy life. It is dark. And if you do it the right way, you can obviously like monetize and have a platform and do all these fun things if you don't let the darkness of it get you down and twisty.

Yes, for sure. Like, I think about, I guess I prefer living with high highs and low lows. Yeah. Like I almost need that. And I think like, we were both like in competition and stuff. Like, let's be honest, we're a little masochistic where we're like, this could go so bad. Yeah. Or it could be so fucking good.

And I fail all the time. Same zies. Like I'm always failing. Yeah. And I think I look back at like horrible times and I'm like, if I sat in that forever, like, that would have sucked. But you just got to like keep moving. back you just keep moving i'm reading a book right now called the mountain is you have you heard of it no it's literally validating all of my feelings and everything i've gone through my life and where i'm

going like it's just the most validating book i've ever read like i feel like she's talking to me the whole time wow i'm so impressed that you read well that was an audio book but i do but i do read is there any like top line thing that you took from the book yeah i should have wrote it down i was listening to it on the plane actually today and i was listening to it on the plane actually today and i was like, I should write that down because I'll forget, and I did. And I was like, but it's good, but it did change my life, but I couldn't tell you what it was. It's funny how you brought up imposter syndrome, because I think of your career, because I've been following you for a while now, and you've accomplished so many crazy things where like it makes me know you have a

creative mind to even think that you're capable of doing some of these things. Like, your mind is really the only thing that stops you, like your creativity. Because if you don't think it, it's not going to happen. Oh, I think about the craziest situations and then years later I'll be in that situation and be like, oh, shit, I did it. I've arrived. You're for real manifesting it. But it's funny you said imposter syndrome because I was, I always like get sports involved, but I was watching like tennis today. Yeah. And they were asking about experience versus confidence. And they were like, I would take a confident player over experienced player anytime. And it made me think about like comedy because I'm like not as experienced as some of the people who've been in it for like 15

years but I'm getting my opportunities now and I'll get imposter syndrome sometimes and I'm like no but wait but you're in the phone it's true I like that that not comparison I guess but whatever that is I like I don't do big words but I like thinking of it as experience or confidence because that's how I got through my whole life was like even if I wasn't the most confident. I would do it with confidence. Yeah. And I somehow got to where I wanted to be. But my favorite thing is saying do it scared. Oh, yes. Like when I put out that song, I was like, people are going to drag me for my voice. They're going to be like, she can't sing. And then I was, I was like shaking and I've never been that scared to do something. And I was like, do it scared.

Just do, if you're scared of something, just do it scared. And then I put it out and then people liked it. And I was like, okay. Well, it's like being comfortable with being uncomfortable. Yeah. If you're always comfortable, it's kind of boring. It's so weird. That's, okay, that's something the book was saying. I'm not doing it justice. Should you just play the audiobook? Yeah.

Do you just have like 12 hours? Let me just read, you know, when it says like the synopsis of the book? Yes, yes. Let me just read you that. I love that. Because it will, what's called? I like metaphors. She's full of them in this book.

Books. Okay. Transforming Self. sabotage into self-mastery yes yeah yes and it's i'm only on chapter two they just download it no this is so many i read the first ends of a caption and i'm like i get it yeah yeah i got it i got the point no i i love that because i i like everyone's self-sabotage and you feel so much shame when you do it because you're like the only thing stopping me was me and i wanted it so bad and i'm the one who hurt myself yes well i should have heard on the podcast

I love that shit. Yeah. It's honestly, every single sentence that comes out of her mouth, I'm like, wow, this should be a book. You should write that down. I'm like, oh, this is what I get reading an audio book. I want to use my highlighter and like. But I love meeting people like you who like, you've accomplished so much crazy shit and you're sitting here being like, well, how do I find, like, sanity and myself? But I don't think I'll ever get.

Oh, what are you doing? What the hell? What in the goof? That's why I called you. Oh, I tried calling you back. Hi, babe. Can you just, like, come in and say hi or something? I mean, we were in a really deep conversation about, no, I'm just kidding.

Are you next door? Oh, yes. Good to see you. Well, you can come just sit, but you don't have to like, wait. I do? I was actually going to say you're glowing and you got off a plane. What? It's a spray tan in the jacket.

Wait, really? Seriously. No, no, it's okay. I just woke up from a nap. I love that you're in a full Canadian tuxedo. Thank you. That was for you. But wait.

Wait, what was I just? Oh, you were saying that you're always going to be mentally ill. No, I'm talking about my... No, I was actually going to go back to my glowing skin. I'm mentally ill. I don't take compliments well. She's like, I feel very... uncomfortable in this moment.

I'm like, we haven't even touched my notes. I don't know why I keep... We knew this would happen. I knew this would happen. Weird. I was telling her about the book that I'm listening to called The Mountain is You. Oh, okay.

She loves that. I'm only on chapter two, but my life has changed forever. Seriously? She kind of fixed it. Yeah. I'm not mentally ill anymore. My most annoying question

that is... What is the biggest takeaway? That my procrastination is actually feeding my what did she say is a symptom of problems we don't know what it is but it's good it's i think she's talking to my subconscious like i could be who's she or whoever the author is but i could be talking brianna weist i could be talking or doing something and i was on the airplane and i was but i feel like she was speaking to my soul somehow and so don't ask me to you know how i do with takeaways. I feel under pressure, and then I go, well, I don't know what my takeaway is. And then I feel

pressure. I feel like your song, if I'm being honest, was speaking to my soul. Well, I'm, but I get a, oh, we're setting a mic up for you. I am. I won't say long, man. Okay. When I wrote, if I'm being honest, it was before I had even met you. I was. I released it when I was with you, but I think I wrote it before I met you. Did you? Yes, I did. Yes, I did actually yes i did i think you wrote it before but i think you sang it like you recorded it when we were together yes yeah but there's the other song you haven't released which also might very much speak to you i'm excited about it the the whiskey one it's about being a hot ass mess i think you'll like it you're gonna love it's great wait why do you think she'd love it just because it's catchy

yeah it's catchy and it's like i love a little yeah i could see yeah enjoying that i think so well i hope so because she's a big fan of my music. No, I really am. We were talking about imposter syndrome, though. And the one thing you can't be an imposter with is, like, being completely yourself. And I feel like in your music, you weren't trying to, like, emulate or speak as someone else. Like, it was so raw and vulnerable, like, a sore in a beautiful way. Yeah, yeah.

And that's why I think, like, we were saying confidence and experience. Confidence can overtake experience. Confidence can overtake experience, yeah. That's what we were saying about, who is it, a tennis player? they'll take a more confident tennis player than a more experienced tennis player. It's funny. So last night, crazy, I drove from Nashville here. Like last minute.

Last minute. Psycho move. The reason I did it is because I'm in New York for the next like 10 days in all different areas, Buffalo, Rochester, Syracuse, New Jersey, I'm doing like my whole friend week. I'm seeing everyone. So I was like, I just want a car and I could just go when I want, how I want. But getting here was a nightmare. But I listened to Jay Shetty's seven rules of confidence.

And it was really, really intriguing. I thought, okay, what was your big takeaway? The biggest, one of the big ones was like when you have a scar, like a scar on my chin, it will be there. It hurt when I press it and I touch it. It doesn't hurt. But so many of us put our head in the sand and we don't address pain and things that have hurt us our whole life.

And so those are still scars all day long that we're pressing and they hurt and they trigger us and it's painful. And one of the big issues is that when you're trying to develop confidence, you will never have confidence with who you are or what you're trying to be until you, like, really tap in to those unspoken scars that still create so much pain. And so many people don't do that. So that was a good one. The other one, too, is he's like, if you want some type of special skill set or acumen or something you want that's like differentiating and you want to just know a little bit about a lot, because if you know just a little bit about a lot, you can enter into so many conversations. sometimes just entering into conversations will make you come across as like very confident

but there are seven really good ones that's cool I mean I don't know a little bit about a lot of things that I consider myself to go into every situation confidence and you're like an indigma of the seven rules because we were saying we like being scared and failing because even on then it's a low low or a high high it's a drug it is a drug we're definitely addicted

to it I like a highs and lows but it's funny I never fully understand when people like you have to feel your feelings I'm like okay I thought about it and it hurt was that it is solved because yeah that was painful yeah but it's like he's saying like you really have to sit in it I guess I learned a thing about forgiveness recently where forgiveness hurts because like you actually just have to take all the pain onto yourself like they're never going to take it away yeah so it's feeling all the pain and saying I'm going to take it for me yeah and I'm okay

with that yes and that's it's almost just like being okay with the pain being okay with fear just like enabling yourself to be human yeah and not pissing yourself off about it and just being okay with it. It's true because one of the other like aha moments I've realized, well, not just this book, but from when I did that week retreat of therapy, which was insane, is that there's no like arrival to having your shit together or being happy or like removing the scars. Like they're never going to get there and be like, got it. No. So you might as well sit in the shit and feel the feels. Okay, I love coffee. I really do. But I also like looking for alternative because sometimes once in a while coffee gives me like those jitters or a crash or I just want to

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But she was saying how self-help gets a little bit like the whole industry. Like I'm a little anti-self-help to a point where like if you always feel like you're not fully the best self. Like you're always just chasing like if I did this, I'd be that person. But why can't we be that person who's always looking out for herself but doesn't feel? feeling complete like why can't you be content with your like nuances and not but sometimes I think the industry takes advantage of people to be like you need to do this and you do that and if you're not waking up at this time and drinking this amount of water I know I hate it I hate the the like cliche self-help shit yes yes because of course some of it is accurate but I hate

when people tell me what to do I think is the number one issue there but um but on TikTok it's so I can vouch for that. My husband, you know, I told you that. But you don't listen to me. You don't listen to me. Which, by the way, it never works. Like when you say, you're listening to me. They'll always, always back by it.

Or someone else will tell me and I'll be like, that was a good point. And you go, oh, I told you that two weeks ago. I want to know while we have Jason here. What your biggest takeaway is from getting married? Oh. Like, do you highly recommend? Is it overrated? did anything change would you do it differently well our it was kind of interesting we met during

covid yeah and then after two dates no like four dates and i was into him i was put into a house a reality tv house and locked up for two months without him without him oh and he came at the end but like also during it i was also with another guy i was talking with like it was pretty messed up and at night i would call him like you know how you're in your height of yeah like you've had so many voices in your head all day you're under pressure it also is like still filming at night with us so i'd call him and i was like the most um heightened version of myself like i had three fights that day like you know a typical day you're not fighting with people right so much i fought with three fights and he still was like not scared and i'm very good of playing the cool girl like i will be the

lay it back girly but i couldn't play that game with him at all yeah and then my favorite story with him was like at one point I think I was trying to make him jealous a little I don't know I was I wasn't in like a mature state right and I remember him being like if you want to play games that's totally cool I just like I don't want to be involved in this and I put my tail between my legs

and I've never done this really so fast because I was putting up a wall with him like I was like he's a comedian he's probably like an asshole right he's good looking like probably the worst so I'm gonna get ahead of it and I'm like I don't like you that

much. And I love playing those games because that's all I had. And I think I would go after guys who weren't available because I wasn't that available. And I just was like, well, nothing bad will happen because I don't like this guy. But when he said that, it was so confident and handsome. And I was immediately like, if you're down, I'm down. Like, he was vulnerable first. And then we would talk for like four hours every night. It was crazy. It was like this intense podcast. And then we move in together right after I get out of the house like a couple weeks after and it was during COVID and after six months we got engaged and it was this kind of just like very fast like whirlwind where my parents got married really quickly so in my in my head I was very like you know you know

yeah and then he's older so he doesn't have a lot of time so he proposed and then we took like a year for the wedding I think it depends where you are in your head like for my ego I kind of of wanted to celebrate like my friendships and my family if I would do it over again I probably would have done something small like it wasn't necessary yeah but after marriage everything just felt really like calm like it was almost just like a nice little bow on what we already had which meant like it just meant like you know there's all this tension like what's going to happen when are they going to propose when are you going to get married once a day all that's just quiet you're like okay we're here we've done this there's no like I mean there's still like

like, do you like me? Every on then you're like, do you still like me? But then are people like, when are you having kids? Um, yeah, but I think like, I'll, like have just come back from like seven tour dates and be like, I literally haven't even seen him in three weeks. I don't know when he would stick his dick in me. And people will say that, but I think it's actually hard like for, wait, do you like, will you actually say that? It depends on the context, but normally yes. That'll shut people up real quick.

That'll get him real quick. You're asking me by my pussy. I could talk about my pussy. But also like, it took me 10 years. It took me 10 years to get to this place in my career. Yeah. And I'm 31. And then it's also like prime time to possibly get pregnant.

And I'm at this place where like I just started to get some momentum and I'm kind of like. Freeze your eggs. That's that could, but yeah. Or just don't have kids. He's like, he's like if you don't, I'm fine. If you do, I'm fine. Yeah. But overall, I think marriage, the day gives you this, like, beautiful memory of just, like, connecting these, like, two beautiful things together.

I didn't like a lot of the traditional stuff of, like, the dad being like, I'm going to give my daughter to you and now you're going to take care of her. Like, I'm like, shut up. I hate that shit. I love the idea of my dad walking me down the aisle, but I hate the idea of it being like, that man gives her to another man. Now she's your problem. Yeah. My property is now your property. it's such an old bullshit stupid yeah and then like me walking as if I'm this like virginal angel

I'm like all my friends are looking at me they're like you fucking slut like shut up so like it was a little and I like to get attention like to earn attention yeah there's this weird attention on weddings where I think if my job wasn't trying to get attention every single day I would have liked it like for the average person who just like wants a day about her I make every day about me I'm a Leo like So I wanted people to be like, is she funny? Then be like, oh, she's funny. But a wedding to be like, all these people are forced to be here for me. I was that people pleasing bride where I was like, is everyone having fun?

Is it good? Are you okay? The best part was the after party when I was like, we did it. And I was like at some like beach bar just like with locals, just like drinking and chilling. Next day I did take a plan B. Interesting. Jason goes, interesting. Because I like was ovulated.

Jason you know what ovulating is and it was this crazy what's ovulating ovulating is when you are in like the most the best position to what is your body to have a baby it is oh man it is it is dropping the egg he's like so he's he's he's impressive like it's a small window it's like two days right the only i told you about ovulation but i'm really shocked you said dropping the egg yeah can get a little credit here no like most men it's just when it to me i'm like oh it looks like i blew my nose on my panties it's i'm ovulating no i was spotting because i realized i hadn't taken my birth control forever because i i was wedding planning obviously so you had to take plan

B, did I say? I basically was like, do you want to have a baby? And he was like, I kind of want to travel for a bit. I was like, go, you're 47. Where have you not been? So, yeah, we took a plan B. I literally had like, I literally had like, like, I actually sound like him. But I had like my wedding makeup still on.

I was like running around a Walgreens. I was like, one of my friends who was a bridesmaid like saw me outside. She's like, are you good girl? And I was like, yeah, just holding the plan B. So it was, it was great. It was fun. I didn't like some of the more traditional aspect. My dad and I are so goofy.

Like he's such a ball buster. We're like best friends. We were so awkward during the father-daughter dance. Like 30 seconds in, we just like stop. We're like, was that good? Did everyone like, two minutes of like holding my dad? Like I was like, absolutely not. He was like, you know, poking me in the side.

I was like, dad, I'll fuck kick you right now. You should get the video at your wedding and do a full skit like telling the behind the scenes while seeing. Because like you say it, I'm like, I want to see it. It was crazy. And then in Irish culture, the bride in the groomed, give speeches. And I was like, okay, I'm not getting paid today to perform.

Like, now I need to stress about my performance. Everyone's probably like, ooh, she's going to be so funny. Well, he's a full professional comedian. Right. So he goes on first and he's murdering, like laughs for a minute, like, bah, blah, blah, killing it. And then he looks over at me and obviously I realize I'm next.

So I'm like looking over my notes and he's like, she's not even enjoying it because she knows she's up next. She's checking her notes. And I was like, this motherfucker. So with comedy, if the crowd's like really hot, when you go on, you have to kind of bring them back down and then bring them back up. So I got up there. Because you know, like if they have a certain energy, it's hard to keep up that. So you kind of slow them down a little.

Oh, cool. It's weird. It's like a psychology thing. Yeah. I'm like going into textbook theory. Kailen's like a nice little. Yeah. She's getting a little hand jab.

Yeah. But it is, it's so much psychology in comedy. So I went up and I like slow people down to almost to the point that they're like, oh, is her not going to be funny? Right. And, you know, he's watching. And I finally have a line and I'm like, I wish, sometimes I wish that I met you when you were younger.

You know, I met you when you were 45. And I wonder what you were like when you were younger, like in your 20s. But then I realized I would have been in kindergarten. And the place like erupted like applause break and I looked at him. I was like, don't fuck with me. So that was fun. But like it was, we did like little things for like. Irish culture and stuff.

But the whole idea of me being like this like white dress beautiful bride. Like I was like this is a joke. I kind of I kind of feel that way too. Like I can't picture myself. It was like fun. But like it's what their friends are like, yeah, you look great. But I'm like, what are we trying to be right? I don't know.

I was, I never thought of myself as a bride. Me either. And to this day, people are like, we forget your marriage. So I was talking to Gen Z because I love Gen Z. And they were like, honestly, being engaged is like way cooler than getting married. Marry's like a little chooky Is it really? Oh my God

Right Joey Marriage is like you have Like just a vision Like remember everyone had like a barn With like Yes Like that was so in It's like got so overdone

Like Pinterest wedding Yes That now it's like Kind of hot to just be like I mean I just wear my engagement ring right now Because my wedding ring is causing a rash I don't know why I should talk to the psychic about it

Yes Bad energy right there But marriage is going well I love that But yeah, marriage gives you a little bit of, like, just security of, like, if something, like, we really want to be together and it wasn't, like, just, it's, it's like, we really did this. It wasn't a bit. Yeah. It wasn't a bit.

Yeah. I joke with him. There was a couple bits. But I joke that when we first realized, like, we were so into each other in the beginning, and he joked, I want to marry you. I just started sending him rings all the time. And I actually realized, I think it's a really good, like, flirt tactic. because like if you start just sending a guy you like rings he's not going to actually think you're serious even though you are yeah and then he'll think it's a bit next thing you know men

they are subconsciously taking that in next thing you know it's not that crazy to buy me a ring that's true you like see I think you we do listen a little more than you expect you do I think you realize you do but you do you do we take like a little mental notes like you know like but like I think it was a bit until it wasn't and that was like kind of funny like even on the wedding day I was like so this isn't we're really doing it. You're not run it. It's like a prank. We're really bad at

being serious, me and my husband, so it was like a good excuse to force us to like acknowledge something and for the families. So it really is a lot about the families. I can see that. I have something in my freaking eyelash. Pluck it out, girl. But I'm scared because it's not

my real eyelash. Oh, yeah. I have a couple falsies in there because I have a baldy spot. Oh. It's fine. Your eyelashes? Yeah. Well, you can't see because I covered it up with fake eyelashes, but now there's like something stuck to it. I'm scared to pull it because then I don't want it to like, I feel like I crash girls time. I don't want to like it.

I have notes to get to. He's such a sensitive soul. Oh, that's nice. What's your sign? Scorpio. Does it Scorpio. Is he? But no, I'm excited for you guys.

Would you like, would you do a little bit if, like at the wedding if you wanted to do it? I'll do a little jig. Could you a little jig? We'll do a roast. We'll do a roast. That's what I met. That's what I met. There should be more Bachelor roast.

Can we produce that together? Katie Thurston put on her own roast, which I thought was. Yeah, but you should do a Bachelor roast. That would be so good. Oh, my God. That would be so fun. We get all these like, oh my God. But they kind of do it to themselves, but like it'll be hilarious.

That's why it's going to be so easy. It's too easy. I mean, all of us. Like, we're so easy to rip apart. It's such a big target. And I think some Bachelor contestants would love to roast each. Yeah, but I think. some batch i think the problem is some bachelor contestants don't think they'd be a target that's the

problem because we are the easiest target but wait i don't even consider myself like in the bachelor franchise and like i know but they're just like or origin so no you you you wouldn't be the one that we roast but you'll definitely roast you okay well when you're there they roast everyone roast you're on bachelor stuff oh of course it could but it's already all been said is what i'm getting that. But wait. But wait a second. But Des will come from me with stuff and he was on like two episodes but you can be like, I saw yours days a bitch.

I always terrible about getting dumped before the fantasy suite. Oh, all the time. Wait, that is so fucking. Yeah, except what's more fun of? I got dumped after the fantasy suite. So like, actually that's really, it's worse. It's unbelievable. You know what the worst is when fantasy sweets are like, we're watching it?

And she's like, oh, that's the part you guys. you never got that way you go she didn't get that dude yeah it's actually i'm actually like really happy about it you're the one that should throw it back at me and be like at least i didn't get dumped after fantasy suite no it is awkward at all they always when they walk out and you're like what the fuck possibly happened yeah that like did he have like an arm coming out of his dick like what could have happened that was so disturbing what's going to be amazing is when they're now doing this like golden bachelor yeah i heard about this the fantasy suites with that oh that's gonna be good TV all people are freaky and they're gonna talk about it

like they don't I'm so excited for that same don't they have like the most STDs in old folks homes yeah they're fucking they are they're fucking and also like you don't want to be worried about chlamydia at 89 yeah like a few more years to go let it rip let it rip right like Kate's like I'm disgust I already don't like balls and then you picture old man balls that's a perfect time that's you and the girls get that like Bye. For The Bachelor, instead of a fantasy suite, I feel like they should take them to a place

where to get, like, couples get in a fight. Like, like, IKEA or something. Or, like, the DMV. Akea. Oh, my God. It's great to see you. Ooh, he smells good. Like, imagine if you go to the DMV instead

and just say, like, can you wait in this line with them for two hours? Can you, like, can you actually be with them? Like, throw them into a supermarket. That's what they did to me with Crystal's the Bachelor. We went to Costco for my date. Hell yeah, it's so fucked up because I was like

I'll fall in love with anyone if I have like a waterfall like some random country singers Why I was a random country singer Always a country singer too A producer in your ear That's being like he's obsessed with you He's obsessed with you

If any guy's into me I'm immediately like he is great taste I love him now Yeah Like I would fall in love with a barnacle I did I fell in love with a few People understand

How many voices are in your head in it And not the voices you want like not your family not your friends no whatever i had once a producer tell me i was dating someone at the time and i don't think they wanted me to be dating that person and they go he was like ending the conversation he goes yeah we just don't see it for you like we just don't think he's right for you and i was like what and he just walked away and like planted a seed and like three weeks later i ended it with the guy yeah but they'd been like that they'd been planting like tons of seeds they were talking about this other guy in my head being like he loves you he's so into you he's

obsessed with you you guys are perfect together like all this stuff and i'm so easy to manipulate because i'm like i'm a i'm an athlete like i want to be coachable and i like to trust people i'm not an athlete but same no but as a dancer you have to be so coachable you're right that is part of it and we're taught someone says jump we go how high yeah that's so true because i can do that so i was very like that with reality tv and that wasn't same and ultimately like even though I wanted to stay as myself like they could convince me to get like upset at things totally that I wouldn't have been upset about even though I do think they really wanted me to pick Nick at the end but I was like I'm not but I do think they wanted me yeah um when you do okay

this is so switching gears but it just came to my mind when you go interview people on the streets how are they all funny well it's a formula okay okay I figured tell me the formula Yeah, let me tell you the behind the scenes. Yeah, I want to know behind the scenes. So every night I was going, doing stand-up at this club. And I'd be there from like 7 o'clock to sometimes 10. So it would be like multiple times a week. And I do 15-minute spots, maybe like two or three.

And then you're kind of hanging in between because each show is like an hour and a half. And I had this idea to ask men like silly, interesting, like, feminist questions to kind of make them uncomfortable or awkward. And I just thought it would bring good content. And it's like kind of a fun feminist thing to do. I love it. Thank you. Yeah, it's so good. And I was asking men just on the street outside the club in between spots.

But it was like these drunk finance guys or like random guys. And I would film. And then the next day they'd be like, I was drunk. Like I don't consent to that. And it was kind of an, and I don't want to put anyone on that doesn't want to be put on. Right. And the comedian men at the club were like, we want to do it. And I was like, I don't want comics.

I want like raw reactions for men. Yeah. But then I realized all men. are the same. Yep. Yeah. As in they're going to give me good raw answers. Yeah.

So the men you see are all the dudes that are hanging out at the club. Some are like open micers. Some are guys who have shows that night. Some are just hanging. Which is even more brilliant. It wasn't planned that way. But then because they know me, they like kind of felt comfortable with me where I could ask insane things and they would actually answer it earnestly.

Yeah. And I think if it was just a random person, I could probably get good stuff but it would be a lot more of a pain in the ass and these guys are the fucking funniest people in the like country and some of them like they just were never noticed yet like they're early in their career they hadn't got momentum and I've been able to kind of introduce them to people in a way and these are like my best friends these guys so I'm but then the girl comics came up to me and they were like how you're putting all these men on what the fuck and I'm like well I'm embarrassing them like I don't want to embarrass the girlies right

And they were like, well, this is f*** up. And I was like, you're totally right. I was like, let me just think how to do this. And then I realized I could ask girls questions to female comics of things that most women would never answer. So it's like slightly different with the women. Yeah. Like about shaving your coochie.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And like, do you spit or swallow? Because female comics, that's all we want to talk about. That's so true. You talk about things that people want to, like, hear but would never say themselves. Exactly. Yeah. And these, the comics are.

so great at it because they love just like the shock factor and also they're they just love getting a laugh they don't care how discussing it is but I do think the one superpower that I have that's consistent throughout my life is that it takes a lot for me to get embarrassed yeah and I don't know why and maybe it's because I've it could be dark like because I've felt ashamed to myself before and I've like sat in it and I'm like I'd rather be stupid and embarrassed than like hate myself yeah but that's amazing I'm sorry I Who the hell is this? Who led this motherfucker in?

Wait, do you know Ashley? Do you not know Ashley? I do. We're podcasting. Wait, Ashley, she has such an amazing special out right now. Don't get it. I'm obsessed with her right now. Me too.

That's why we asked her to come out the pod. Wait, I'm obsessed with you right now. We were trying to get coffee, but we kept missing out. That's, no, you can hang. Can I say something about her? please when i when yes of course you can we have so many guests when i first started comedy what podcast am i on it's like whose line is this but it's who's which pot is this and we just come out and they give us a suggestion of three influencers they're there they're talking about brand deals we need

we need a bachelor we need a reality tv and then a lesbian we needed a lesbian to balance it out this would be a great podcast all together right now keep rolling who can Ashley turn today okay stop it it's too early

I barely know Caitlin so Ashley and I we've known each other for years and when I first started comedy I met you like on a we met on Raina's roof another podcast

or girls got to eat yeah I know Raina and I just started podcasting I'm sorry comedy and Ashley was like really cool off the bad she likes cats too i'm like this is great i was so nervous i couldn't even believe i was at the party you have to understand i had nothing going on and like two weeks prior my i don't even know how i met rayna actually now that i'm maybe through remi but my i went viral for the first time and and

i had nothing going on like truly nothing going on people were like um yeah you were like how did i get here who let me in but i was i was a new friend too so i didn't know i was just like this is awesome when I started comedy I asked her how to write a joke she taught me how to write a joke like four years ago five years ago

and it's the kind of thing where comics don't help other comics in that way like we all have our own works but especially for you because you didn't you started so different from other people so people were like very competitive where you came in people were already very competitive

and very like oh who's this like internet like reality you know what I mean but I knew you were very funny not to, you know, not to... But I felt safe with her to be like, I have no fucking clue what I'm doing and I've been writing jokes, but like, how does a real comic write jokes? And she

just, like, showed me her process and, and I like, so, anyway, I'm a friendly lesbian. Anyway, I am... Like, now I want to just be like, you're not like Ellen DeGeneres. Because I watched your special last night. Oh, thank you. And that really meant a lot to me that you actually watched it because I've done a couple other podcasts and they

very, they like fully were like, yeah, I got through a couple of minutes. I was like, don't say that on the air, bro. I got through a couple I was like, I went on a journey with you on that special. Thank you. Thank you. Oh my gosh. It was really incredible. Are you going on her pod next? Yeah. That was the idea. I thought I was late. I was the best thing ever. I was panicking. Well, and I was not even looking at the clock and when you came and I was like, this makes me so happy. No, she's one of my best friends in comedy. I'm so happy right now. Also, Caitlin, we've been just like each other's dicks this whole time, but like she's so naturally funny.

I know. I know that. Look at you wearing a wedding ring. Am I? Is that your virginity ring? It is my virginity ring. This is my straight virginity ring. I will only take it off when I get pounded.

By a man. And a cis man. And I am not. I am not. I still have it. And I'm just waiting for the right guy. And honestly, put me on the bachelorette. I think that we'll just make it super problematic.

We'll see. I've been waiting for them to do. Man to take your virginity? Yeah, yeah. Which one of you guys wants to try? Men are always like, I could get her. But I think that would be fun. I think it would be fun.

I took that too. Should I leave? No, absolutely not. So we're starting a production company. So far we have a roast of bachelor contestants. You're going to be the Bachelorette on another thing. And we're doing a podcast festival. Yeah.

Well, we really did. This was podcast festival is a very fun idea. Isn't it? Very fun idea. Yeah, she definitely needs to be in on it. Well, yeah. Absolutely. we'll talk to our team we have

who's on your team us just us we started our own team we started it 10 minutes ago what's it called um hand handlin handlin i love it it sounds it sounds Norwegian handlin does sound like every rich celebrities kid in the south

Hanlon Hanlon Lynn you get over here we have a tea time Hanlin Lynn Lynn and Barbara you get over here right now we have a tea time Halen put the champagne down That's for daddy

Oh my gosh That's it Now we have to Kate and I have one more thing To pitch for a production company Okay Conversion Camp But for straight girls

To become lesbians To learn about orgasms I love this idea Did you just come up with that right now I've actually been kind of working on a bit I've been doing that for a while Would you know if people try to get gays to be straight I'm like, I feel like

get straight people to see what it's like to be gay. Yeah, they should have to walk. Two very attractive women should have to walk around holding him. Not even very attractive. Just walk, just see what it's like to walk down the street holding hands

with another woman. It's actually crazy. It's really, it's a bigger deal than you think. Everyone just looks at you. They look at the hands. They look at the world. They're like, you both have long hair.

What the f*** is going on? How could this possibly be? But it's true, lesbians. They have no orgasm gap, no STDs. They like don't care what you think. Well, not no SDD. We can't say like, I'm very uneducated.

It's less, it is harder. I'll say it's significantly harder. You don't know very many lesbian texts. I'm just like, I lie? No, you're right, you're right. Hannah is the biggest ally, besides you. I'm number one. I'm number two.

Yeah, we're very competitive. She beat me in Bear Pong. We're not over it. I'm like, I'm actually tied for first place with you. Yeah, we're tied now. That's such a good idea, Hannah. I really answer that. Well, I'm assuming to force people to be uncomfortable,

but I feel like experiencing, life coding in different ways. Yeah, yeah. But the people like, how you were talking about when they're like, here's how we're going to get people from being gay, like put all the lesbians in a cage and like, and then you're like, I'm already in. Like that sounds great to me. I've actually worked my whole life to achieve that in a theater and I have.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so then I'm like, well, if you made those people that are like, get rid of the gays, you put them in this camp, make them uncomfortable. And then they'll be like, oh, I kind of get it. Yeah. I have one thing I want to do. you before i let you go before you're the producer of our podcast you stay you say don't move don't flinch right there yes ma'am okay you know how your podcast it's called burning and hell yes so i have a game called heaven or

hell fun and it's um i'm gonna read you some hypothetical situations love and then you tell me if it's your idea of heaven or hell love going on a comedy tour for an entire year i think heaven i actually love traveling and I love to be like I'm on tour so people think you're so busy but you're just like sleeping all day I'm like I'm on tour and everyone respects it so much but I'm literally like jerking off and eating room service you're literally you're literally just trying to inhale a breath of regular life before you have to run back on stage because we're really like bartenders it's like from seven to midnight we're working yeah and then during the day you're just trying to like have as much rest as possible yeah because you're tired after the show knowing you have to wake up at 6 a.m.

to like jump on a flight and then you get to the hotel the hotel's not ready oh yeah i fully was lying in toronto like in a public park this was last week can you got to use your points are you with a hotel yes you have to go in and be like i am diamond medallion yeah and then tell them that there's a mistake if that's not true but like sometimes i feel like it's not open at at noon when i get in yeah my my room's not ready for early check-in i needed these are all i call this admin which i don't like to do i'm a creative Soul? Yeah.

Do you an assistant? Um, no, but I'm kind of working on it. My manager helps. It's so much logistics. Yeah, you got it. No, I literally was lying on my back in Toronto with a Starbucks just sleep napping before my hotel was ready. And I'm like, if anyone saw me, they'd be like, Hannah's not doing well. Yeah, but everyone's Canadian.

They're probably like, let her have a nap. I'm sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Okay, being alone in a cabin in the woods for two weeks doing nothing with Des. Heaven. Sign me up immediately. Really?

I'm a people person in that, like, I love to perform and stuff, but I prefer, like, one-on-one smaller situations. That's where, like, I'll get my energy, and I love being alone, too. I love being alone. I'm kind of... I'm just like shy. I'm just a shy girl.

I'm a little shy, baby. Switching places with an A-list celebrity for a month. I feel like that would be hell. I talked to Barbara Corker, and she's scared the fuck on me. She told me that. There's something intimidating about her, though. She's the best.

She's intimidating because she's worth millions of dollars and is scared of no one. But she's really funny and likable, but she looked at me and she goes, you're the perfect level of fame right now. She goes, it only gets worse. And I was like, shit. But I do feel like sometimes

A-list is, it could be kind of a curse. Yeah. Do I, am I going to stop if I have a chance to be A-list? absolutely not I'm not that person that's like I'm not going to do it like your goal is to be as successful as possible but sometimes people who get there if they haven't worked on their inner shit like it could be bad you could also learn a lot from that experience I think yes because don't you think if you like could be a list for 20 days before you get there maybe you'd make some strategic changes to make it a little easier on yourself or you go a list and

you're like getting the royalty treatment and then you have to go back humbling humbling hard i don't know if i'll be able to do it it's like back on the park bench in toronto absolutely not yeah yeah so actually it will be held because i don't want to taste that that life i don't want to have a jacuzzi one day and then be back on the park bench um okay go back on reality tv if i'm not um like help part of like executive producing i would like in on ensemble cast i think it'll be hell because it's like when i've worked so hard to like be able to do it myself and not depends on a reality show for attention yeah and it's like why risk it and depend on them like ruining your whole career because they want you to be a certain character for a few months

you said it yeah um okay tv trauma i know i i'm so glad i don't have it just wait you'll get approach for some L-word shit. Yeah. The real L-W-W-D. The real L-W-A. That shit's wild. The L-W-Rid was actually really good. I used to watch it.

I did too. I did too. How do you recommend? Okay, living in a TikTok creator house. Hell. Hell, hell, hell. I'm not good with the whole, like,

living in a house. I love to be, like, alone sometimes. Have you talked to a 20-year-old TikTok creator? I don't think anyone has because they don't speak. They don't, they don't speak. Sorry, I'm just like an old man right now.

These kids. They're just on their phone all the time. I've been working on this bit about how like they take all the top TikTokers and they put them in this house to cultivate like new ideas and create content and stuff. And I'm like, that's how ISIS was formed. How do we not learn from history? Like there's something about it that I'm like, this is not healthy for anyone. I also like the idea that it's like a lab, like the genius minds of our time coming up with

stupid little dances. But you know they're all fighting. It's like, well, she put her in my video. and he's in his bit of you know and you just wake up in the morning you're like you want to collab and they're like oh I'm busy and it just ruins your day you know like my f*** dances I know my last video bomb but I'm I swear I'm worth it but the thing is this is it is because they're 20 and that's why when but they're also not real people Hannah there are 20 year olds out there who are real people yeah these kids are not they have not they are not okay they're

experiencing well also imagine your only self-worth is the amount of likes you just got in a video when you're in your 20s. They need a rehab program. But that's also what like when men, when older men are dating girls in their 20s, it's also like, what the fuck are you talking to them? Yeah.

Yeah. But I guess they're not talking. I mean, I can get down with an older man, just not like 80. Oh, sure. I'll do 80. Yeah.

You would, eh? I have to, hey. I have to watch the Anna Nicole Smith documentary. Speaking of that, just came out on Netflix. I can't wait. I saw that and I'm really excited about it. How 80D are we?

Huh? Are we ADD? Yeah. Fully. So let's welcome my next guest. I'm trying not to talk too much. I'm trying to give the hand of the floor and. Well, let's just say.

We'll put this in there. Where can people watch your, I'm obsessed with your street videos where you just interview these. Hand on the street. Hand on the street. Yeah, follow me on TikTok, Instagram, my podcast, Giggly Squad with page. Your handle. Hannah underscore burner, I think.

I think so. Yeah. And then, yeah, I'm on tour. Yeah. Where can people find the dates? Anaburn.com I'm going to be in Vegas At the win theater

At the win It's hard Vegas is hard sell Because people are like So much competition Yeah So much competition So I think the week of is when

I need to like push it hard So I go to Vegas Wow See me in the 26 Also it's very touristy A lot of the people who are going To see you Vegas Are not from Vegas

Plan a patchedrette party right now When are you going The 26 Of this month? Yeah Oh I can't come Oh But I really want to

That would be fun. But yeah, I'm touring everywhere pretty much. Just go to hannahburn.com. I'll be there. Okay, well, I just had the best time with Hannah and then to bring Ashley into the mix, even better. A little cherry on top of delicious cake, one would say. So we will be back next Thursday for grape therapy

because this Thursday is, that was a terrible drum roll. National Wine Day, and I've got a special episode planned with Alex from Spade and Sparrow's, my business partner. We're going to talk about all of the behind the scenes of owning and running a wine company. It's a lot, ups, downs, and everything in between. So grab your wine glasses and fill them up to the brim for that one because we are open books. Shit's about to get wild up in here. I'm Caitlin Bristow. I'll see you next Tuesday.

I'm John Glover. Emmy Award-winning researcher, John Glover, and I'm Marissa Pinson. Critically unacclaimed TV writer, Marissa Pinson. And we're the host of the new podcast, On Brand with John and Marissa. Join us every week for an exploration of the world's most interesting and iconic brands, like Walmart. Do they still have the old people who say welcome to Walmart? No, they got rid of them. You just want more old people in the store?

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