Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Jamie Otis

Episode Date: January 2, 2018

"Former Bachelor" and "First Sight" alum Jamie Otis opens up about marrying Doug Hehner and their life with a four-month-old daughter, as well as embracing her post-pregnancy body and coping with the tragic loss of her previous pregnancy. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Who's that with OTV? Who's that with OTV? Podcast One presents Off The Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Caitlin is creating a space where girls and gents can feel empowered to be themselves. Get ready for lots of laughs, tabby topics, on filtered advice, and wine. Lots of wine. Get ready to shake things up. Here's Caitlin.

Okay. Happy holidays. Happy all of us. So welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow, and I've got to be transparent with you guys. We recorded some of this podcast and something happened with the audio, and we're having to restart. So just so you guys know if we like start laughing because we've already talked about something, that's why. So I'll do my introduction again, even though I felt like this was, I've already done it, but because I have.

Yeah, well, you have. See, now the wine's flowing. That might be a good thing for the podcast, that now the wine's been flowing. It's going to be way more fun this time around. So as I said, so I'm still in New York City. I was complaining about being tired. And then I was like, Caitlin, can you not complain about being tired with a mom in the room? Yeah.

So let's introduce our guests. You may remember her from, this is how I always say his last name, Ben Flangelo-L-Lagnik. But I thought it was, I thought there's a J in there. There is a J in there, but it's Ben Flannick. Oh, the J is silent. Yeah, very fancy. Oh, that is. Oh, the J is silent.

Okay. So you're from his seasons, seasons, season. And then people always gave you crap for being awkward, but you're not. You were just in an awkward situation? I was really young, and I was. You were young? I was pretty awkward. admit it. Okay, fine, you're awkward. In an awkward situation. Yes. You went on to go on Bachelor

Pad and then went to marry the man you met on married at first sight, then married at first sight. What was it? The first years. Gosh, you've done a lot. Yeah. Jamie Otis is in the building. I was looking through your Instagram and I saw a bad haircut. Now, if this was me, I would have, this is, I use Twitter to, like, complain. I'll be like, Ooh, I'm going to tag that company and get free stuff on this. You're so transparent. I'm so transparent. But you, which I actually now, I really respect this, and I'm going to try and have a Jamie Outlook on things now, because you went to a hair salon with a group on, and you said it had a five-star rating.

It did. Yeah. So you had confidence going in there. I did, yeah. And ended up getting absolutely butchered, but had the best attitude about it. If anybody's listening, go to her Instagram and look at this haircut and look at her outlook. on it. Tell me your story. Okay. So I was telling you before we... Let me fill up one. Because, yeah, fill us up. I can't believe this is happening. You know, technical errors. What can you say?

It happens. But yeah, so I was telling Caitlin that I went to group on because I had to get it, just my hair trimmed. That's all I wanted. And I went there and immediately I knew the girl was young. You want to trim. Sike, you're getting a chop. She tried her best. And this is the thing. I was telling, I was telling Caitlin. Like, I'm a new mom and I have a daughter. And so I just envision, and I've also been in, like, the food industry. So if anyone's ever been a waitress or a bartender or even a cook, for heaven's sake, like, you know, like, the struggle is real because people are assholes. Yeah, and you have nightmares about those things. Like, this girl will probably, this was her nightmare and then she just lived it. So now it's going to haunt it for a long time. Well, I'm hoping it doesn't haunt her because, so this is what happened.

So I can tell she's young. So I'm making small talk with her, like, how much experience does she have? Yeah. She's, like, brand new. And I'm like, okay, this is great. Yeah, here we go. But I, and I probably should have just turned around and laugh, but who does that? I mean, that's really rude.

Right. So I sat down and I started looking in the magazine. And before you know it, she's like, she's like, looking at me and she's like, oh, this is my bad side. And then they go get someone who's a little more. I don't even know what that means either. I was like, that doesn't not sound good. So I look in the mirror and like literally half of my head is just like hacked. It's so hacked.

Like the Instagram picture, it is. And the poor. And there's like one like rat tail in the front. Just like is hanging on with your life. Yeah. It's not like this was in the back. Yeah. So, you know, but like you could see.

the agony on her face. And so obviously my first reaction was like, oh my God, I'm going to film a new TV show. My hair is a master. How am I going to fix this? And then like she was gone long enough that I could like regroup and be like, okay, this girl clearly just started. And she didn't mean to hack my hair. She's clearly like very sorry about it and embarrassed. And yeah, there was really no saving it. And you tipped her. I did tip her because she like couldn't make eye contact with me. She was so embarrassed. Like, yeah, I felt bad for her. We hope she's listening to the podcast because it's okay. I just like my thing is I don't want her to feel like, you know, she went to school for this.

And I don't want her to feel like she's a complete failure because of one time. Of course. Like we've all really screwed up before. I probably would have taken to Twitter and made her feel like a failure. And now I feel bad for even thinking that because I'm like, you're right. Yeah. Yeah. You know what?

I don't know. It breaks my heart to think. And it's because I have a daughter now. It's weird what happens when you have a kid. You're right. Like you think of things differently because like you think, oh my gosh, one day that could be my daughter. Yeah. Yeah, and you don't, and you also don't want to show your daughter that, like, you know, a bad haircut will make you less of a, you know, like, that you have to be like, you know what, it's hair and it grows.

Yes. Like, you're teaching every second, like, you realize that you're like, you're on the stage for your daughter. She's learning. Like, literally right now, my husband and I get in like a little like, like, I don't know if we get in like a little like where we're like fighting a little like, where we're like, fighting a little bit. I'm like, no, let's smile in front of Henley. Yeah, yeah. I don't want her to see us fighting. Yeah.

I know. It's, yeah, you're probably so aware of. your every move. You are. You become hyper aware because you don't realize it, but everything you do, like she's so impressionable. She's so young and she really, I feel like they really, they learn like way before we ever realize it, you know? So you're like, I love my new haircut. Yeah. Mommy's crying because these are happy tears. Exactly. I just think that's so cool that you did that and that you tipped her and that you, you left her a little note, didn't you? Well, I just said thank you. Yeah. Because what do you say? Exactly. But that's, I just think

that's so great. And I'm going to try and have more. an outlook like you did on things now instead of complaining. Like, no, I'm not going to, I was about to complain about airplanes. Why would I go there? I don't know. That's where my brain went out. I was like, what do I usually complain about airplanes? Because it's like human nature, though.

It is. But that's true. I'm going to look at things differently now. So you, okay, you were just on a new episode of the Road to Ari. Yes. You didn't watch this, but you got a tweet. Yes. And you found out that you were number one on the road to Ari.

Is that what it's called the Road to Ari? I think so. Of the number one most awkward kiss? Yeah. I don't know what this Road to Ari was, but apparently I'm number one. So, hey, there's that. Well, at least you were on it because Sean and I were not. Yeah.

Oh, memorable couples? Let's catch up with them. Not Sean and Caitlin. Yeah, that's not fair because you guys are the most memorable. I just took it. I just, well, I'm like trying to talk to you about something. And I'm like, Emma, what about me? Sorry.

Well, I mean, it's fair to say because you are a success, you're a huge success story. And same with Jojo and Jordan, and they weren't on it either. But I've noticed that they do lots with their bachelors, not the bachelorettes. And they are kind of focusing on babies so we don't have that yet. But, I mean, hey, Rachel and Brian were on it, and their dog was their baby. And I'm like, we have, okay, I'll stop. Wait, is Rachel still with her? Oh, that's so great.

I feel like the bacheloretts have more of a success. They totally do. Yeah. They totally do. Girls are really there. for and what is it with the guys? I mean, I want to do like a study about this. I know. We've talked about it on my podcast before just wondering like what that is. Yeah. I think it's a little bit of luck. Like Lauren Bushnell said it was a little bit of luck, which I totally agree with. But it's

also there's got to be something and some kind of science behind it. But anyways, you were number one, not that you really want to talk about this anyways, but you were number one most awkward kiss. Yeah. And I found out through Twitter where someone was like, oh, you're the most awkward kisser in all of Bachelor history. And I read it out. loud, you know, like on my phone from Twitter to my husband. And he literally just high-fives me. Nice high-five. I mean, that's my husband. That's why, that's why we're so married. Yeah, because he hi-fies you over that. Yeah, he's like, oh, I love it. You're awkward. You're awkward with other men. Kissing another man. Not him. I told him I was saving

the good kisses for him. Oh, that's so sweet. Yeah, that's so, but anyways, you've redeemed yourself since then. You were young. You're 23. I was so young. Who isn't awkward at 23. Like, especially going on a dating show being compared to all these women and battling against them for one man. That is so wrong. Yeah. So many ways. I mean, like I told you before, I mean, Courtney Robertson, if anybody knows who Courtney, I mean, gorgeous. Absolutely stunning. And you wouldn't know it just from watching the show because, you know, TV plays a role. But she's very, very friendly. She is like, she is like a 10 in all categories. Yeah, she is. She's really sweet. I met her on the street one day. on the street?

Yeah, by accident. We, like, walk by each other in New York. And he was like, oh, hello. I was like, hey, and she's like, Caitlin. I'm like, Courtney, what the? It's so weird. It's such a weird world. Yeah, that's so funny.

Yeah, she is. She's stunning and sweet. Yeah, and my husband thinks she's gorgeous. He was sure to let me know. And I was like, turn your head to me. And you're like, and back to me. I can hear you. Yeah.

That's so crazy. So, I mean, at the age of 23, I don't like, you know, you were put in a situation where it's like, oh, you need to step it up. Like, let's be sexy with him. I don't like that. I don't like if you don't have to be sexy with guys. Okay, being yourself can be sexy. Being yourself can be sexy. Absolutely, because confidence is sexy.

Yeah. And if you're with the right guy, he will think you're sexy. And if he doesn't think you're sexy, then tell him goodbye. Yeah, exactly. I hate that, I mean, in this situation, Bachelor and Bachelor and Bachelors, they're put on this pedestal, including myself, I was, so that people are made to believe you want to like them and you need to need them. Yeah. It's like literally you feel like that's the only man in the world while you're there. And like, if he doesn't like you, then you're S-O-L.

Yeah. It's the weirdest process. Yeah. And the only thing that I love taking out of it is just how much you grow from the experience. It's true. Because every day you're sitting in a room talking about who you are and your feelings and what you want in life. Yeah. And so that is a plus I will take from them.

We got to give the therapist. I was going to say the producers because they are like therapists. They are. Like a pat on the back because they have to sit there and listen to us, talk about our problems. and like literally we just talk about ourselves all the time in interviews. Yeah, except they don't care. Yeah, I mean, they, yeah. They listen to our problems and they're like,

how can I screw her with this? You know what? I don't know if you had this. I had like some pretty awesome. There's a couple people I'm still have really good friends with. Yeah, same. I had some great ones. And then there's also some who could give two crap.

Yeah, exactly. So you have to like, you have to figure out where the bad apple is and just refraing. Yeah, well, that's true. Because then you're like, oh, you still care about me now? Oh, cool. I, I like, totally want to talk to you more about production. But that's like me, they're hearing. That's another time.

I could see. We could talk for hours about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No one cares to know about that. I'm like, do I talk about it now? No, not enough wine. But yeah, it is. It's a crazy, crazy.

Yeah, it is. It's wild. And it took you to Bachelor Pat, right? Yeah. And then, oh, this is, it's so funny because we're re-talking about things because the audio wasn't working. So anyways, I heard horror stories about the Bachelorette. Bachelor Mansion when they're filming Bachelor Pad and stuff like that because you're all living in a house together where on Bachelor and Bachelor at you're separated. So the guys all live together and you don't see them unless you're on camera. Right. But on Bachelor Pad, you're all living together. So you're like sleeping in the same house. Yeah. And it's a free for all. Yeah. It's a free for all. The camera crew people and producers told me horror stories about this room called the Boom Boom Room, how you'd go in there. Because I love that you know that the title was the Boom Boom Room.

Yeah. That's, they did, if we did interviews, they'd be like, where's the interview? Oh, it's in the boom boom room. And that's when we'd go. That was like, that's awesome. I don't even think some people know why it's that, but that was like a known. That mansion is gross, too, by the way. Like, there's rats. There really, well, we realize this on the bachelor pad. Oh, you did. Yeah, because they would literally, we would be up, you know how it is. You'd be up all hours the night drinking, like, relentlessly. And like, we saw one in the kitchen. And then, like, we all jumped on the couch. Yeah. The thing is just like, yeah, crazy. Because it's gross in there. You get that many people just, like, drinking and eating all the time. I never really saw cleaners either. Like, did anyone come in to clean it? I don't think so. Because, like, everything is so, like, hush, hush about what's being happening while you're filming.

Yeah. So, like, no cleaners. So, like, no sneak peeks or whatever. And usually, you know, you're not in the bachelor mansion for too long because you start traveling. We were there for, like, five weeks. We didn't start traveling, like, on our season for a really long time. That is.

You know what? I think for our season as well, but not, it wasn't five weeks. It was like two weeks. And then we were like, thank God. And it's funny when you're on The Bachelor, like, you're so excited that you're not eliminated just so you get to go to like the next place. You're like, where are we going? What's next? And then when like everyone cheers like, oh, we're going next.

It's like, yes, I'm part of this. I always had such weird. I'd be like, oh, my gosh, this is my life. When you do the toast and you have to hold the glasses up high, I'm like, oh my gosh, I can already hear like next week on The Bachelor. And I'm like, this is my life right now. I cannot believe I'm living in the Bachelor Mansion doing the cheers after I got a rose. yeah it's so wild yeah i just i had so much fun on i always say this on the bachelor just because i think i was at such a good point in my life i was 29 i had figured myself i went through bad

breakups i had like picked myself back up i was in this place where i was like i'm here for the adventure and i'm here for if i get love out of it great bonus and i just had such a good time yeah i can remember going i've already told you this on the camping date and just like drinking a bottle of Jack Daniels, dancing around the campgrounds, everybody was sleeping. I was just like singing, oh, Canada, and just being like, I'm having a blast. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. I feel like that's a good place to be in because I was the complete opposite. I was, like, insecure. Like, I literally felt like a fly in the wall. Like, I get to watch behind the scenes as they happen. This is amazing. And, like, I would choose who I thought. Like, I thought Casey B in the beginning. I thought she,

do you know who that is? Yeah. Yeah, of course. She lives in Nashville now. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I thought she was, like, perfect for him. And I remember one of the producers. was like, good, but what about you? And I was like, oh, not me. Like, I wouldn't be good for him. But this girl and him, oh, they are going to be so good together. But that's got a little bit of confidence behind it. Yeah, that's true.

I mean, I was really good at picking out who would be great for him. There you go. But like, I've said it before. If I was 23 and on the batser, I would have been completely awkward and insecure to you because that's every 23-year-old. And there I am, number one, awkward kisser. That's how it happens, y'all. Hey, it's memorable. Yeah.

It's my favorite time of the podcast. where we talk about bright sellers wine, you can discover new wines that are delivered directly to you for personal wine bottles sent to your door each and every month. All you got to do is fill out a fun seven question quiz. It will build your personal flavor profile to find out your perfect wine. You discuss what kind of chocolate you like. How do you like your tea?

And if you don't like a certain bottle, your wine concierge will help find a replacement. There's wines from all around the world, Italy, Spain, Portugal, South America, and you vine listeners using my link can take the quiz and get a preview of recommended wines for free. You can also get 50% off your first box if you go to brightsellers.com slash off the vine. Again, that's 50% off your first box, four bottles of wine, delivered directly to you if you go to brightsellers.com slash off the vine. So I thought we'd get to confessions because that's what we do. Every week, I'm like, how the heck am I going to come up with a new confession?

I do do enough stupid stuff. See, like right there. I was like, I do-do. But I do enough dumb things where I'm like, I can confess. But it's hard to think of something every week. So my only confession that I could really think about was that I stayed up the other night for, like, an embarrassing amount of time, YouTubeing clips of myself with Sean and our cuteness. I mean, if that's what it takes to keep the flame alive.

Oh, yeah. I was like, hmm, we are cute and you are hot. Yeah. I mean, he is very attractive. It's stupid. Sometimes I feel like inadequate. No, you guys are like a power couple as far as like the hotness level for both of you. Oh, see, and I think I'm just like, I keep up the group average with my humor.

No. Actually, but he's really funny too. Don't sell yourself short because you're really pretty. Oh, I'll thank you. Yeah. As matter of fact, like, teach me your ways because, like, I feel like, I feel like you. you have such a great body. I really do. Really? Yeah. Like, do you work out all the time? No. Maybe. You eat healthy. I eat very healthy. Yes. I eat very healthy. I, I work out sometimes. I work out, like,

maybe twice a week. That's really good, though. Yeah, that's pretty good. Because I haven't done. Sometimes I don't. Confession. Here's my confession. I haven't worked out, and I can't tell you how long. And actually, another confession, this is, like, embarrassing to admit, but it's all going to come out eventually anyways on our show. My husband and I have not had one of good sex in probably more than half a year. Well, that is so relatable to all the moms out there. It really sucks. It's, you know what? That is one thing where I'm like, sometimes Sean and I get into conversations where we're like,

we don't have sex enough. Like, what are we doing? We're engaged. I think there's so much pressure to have, like, a great sex life. There is. So much pressure. You know what also somebody said to me, when was this? Oh, my girlfriend said this to me at dinner the other night.

And I was like, whoa, great point. She said, the thing you have to worry about is when you don't actually want to have sex. But when you can't, like, you know, I always, like, I'm like the thought of having sex with Sean, I'm like, yeah, great. Yeah. Yeah. Like, nothing turns me off about that. Yeah. It's the second that when you don't want to, that's a problem.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, and it's not even like, and you might not want to for other reasons. Like, I don't want you because I'm tired is, it's fine. But if you still desire that person, yeah, yeah, yeah. You have to still desire that person. That's a good point. Yeah. Because, you know, the anatomy downstairs after having a baby, it's just not the same.

Yeah, no. And, like, I feel like girls, I wish someone would have told me how hard it would be because I work in labor and delivery for heaven's sakes. I'm a nurse. Yeah, no kidding. Yeah. Like, I should, why don't I know this? Like, no one, no one really talks about it, though, either.

I mean, it is painful. And I'm actually the other night we tried to get and I'm like, I'm going to doctors. Yeah. Because I genuinely think there might be something wrong down there because it hurts. How old is your baby? She is three and she's going to be four months soon. Oh, my gosh. Yeah.

And so that's like, and like we didn't even really have good sex in the last trimester. Yeah. It's like my poor. And I feel like I need it. Yeah. And my poor husband because he's like, I feel connected from, you know, from sex really. Like it is, it's very, like a man thing. It is a man thing.

Yeah. And I wish I was more like that because I honestly, I'm so effing tired anyways and I'm like, oh. You're like, or I could sleep. Yes, exactly. I know. I know. Yeah. It's just so different.

like the you know guys and girls are so different it's so true but like some girls like I was talking to one of my friends the other day and she was like oh I'm the guy in the relationship I could have it three times a day all day every day like and I'm like that'd be nice but yeah yeah yeah but I don't have that I don't have that much libido especially now and I think well I'm exclusively nursing as well and so I think like hormones play a role but I don't know what it is but it needs to be fixed because I'm like my husband's going to start having a wandering eye if I like I mean and I almost want to be like yeah I almost want to be like go ahead. I feel bad. Like, it's been so long. Yeah, yeah. That's funny. Well, first of all, thank you for confessing that because I love when people are honest on this podcast. And so many people will relate to that. Yeah. And that's such a normal thing in relationships with or without kids. Yeah. It's just always a conversation. That's true. And I do think, like, as long as you just desire that person. That's all that matters. Yeah. And you know what's crazy? That's another thing is that I feel like I've never loved my husband more. I don't know if this happens to everybody after they have a baby. As a matter of fact, like, in my family, I thought I come from a very different type of

family. Let me start up by saying that. Yeah. But sometimes, like, the dad's head out. Like, they piece out and they like, you know, and like, you know, the relationship is just not the same after having a baby because it's so much more work. Of course. You can't tell, you can, like, I could tell you to, till I'm blue in the face how much work it is and you still won't understand until you have the newborn. Yeah. It is crazy how hard it is to have a baby. Yeah. And I don't know. Like, I feel like our, like, it's, I feel so blessed. I genuinely do that my husband, like, we just have grown so much more in love since having her. That's so sweet.

Yeah. I don't think that happens all the time. Yeah. So I don't want to, like, you know, give the wrong impression to your audience. I feel like people go through phases. I mean, gosh, that's relationships in general go through things. Like honeymoon phase. And you're like, oh, gosh, are we even meant to be together?

And then you kind of like, oh, this is a different kind of love and I actually truly deeply love you. And then you're like questioning things again. And then, but it's, that's every relationship. And like you said, for so many things in life, people don't have these conversations enough just so that everybody can really. Like mental health, how many times you have sex in your relationship, being insecure, being vulnerable, being who you are. Like, people just don't have these conversations enough because everybody can relate and understand and be there for each other if we do.

Yes, exactly. And the thing is we don't talk about it because it's, let's be honest, it's a little embarrassing. You feel a little less than when you expose the fact that literally it's been six months since I've had sex with my husband, you know, like, who admits that out loud? I guess I just did. But I think you should because I think now other people would be like, oh my gosh, me too. If someone would have told me that that was, like, even a possibility, because I didn't even think that was a possibility. Like, I thought, I knew in the third trimester, I was like, okay, well, we haven't had sex.

But, you know, after the six week checkup, oh, yeah, it's all going to be fine. Everything's going to be great. And we're going to, like, revive. And I don't know why I even thought that. Yeah. Because that's not for lack of trying, because we're trying, especially him. Like, he'll try something. Another night, I was like, okay, I do.

I really want to try with you, but not tonight. Well, and you're in pain, so that doesn't help. Yeah. Yeah, well, like, we hadn't even, yeah, it is still very painful. I don't, I don't, I don't, I guess it's like hormones. I don't know. I'm going to figure that out. I'm going to go to the doctor.

You go to the doctor and you figure that out. I'm beginning to wonder if this is normal. Should I not admit this out loud? But that's why we don't talk about it. Because we wonder. My podcast is the safe place. Thank you. Everybody who listens to this is always so understanding and, like, loves hearing people's

real stories. Yeah, because I feel like you're right. Like, I can't be the only person who's ever experienced this. Absolutely. not. Yeah. No, it's a probably happens in, actually, I know it happens in every relationship. Really? Yeah. So you are not alone. Good. Thank you. See, this is why I'm here. Thank you for making me feel more human. Yes. Unless alien. No, I will always, always. Even if you told me the craziest thing, I'd be like, good for you. I feel like that is the craziest thing. I mean, like, but what's the craziest thing you've ever heard in confessions? I would tell you, but she actually messaged me and asked me to remove it from the podcast because it was. It's that bad. I'll tell you. I'll tell you. I'll just. okay it's hilarious but like I still think it could have been on there she should probably just like let loose and just let it all who cares let it all hang out but then after she was like I can't even say who but it was so funny but it was also like it was acceptable yeah but you know what when you're in your own skin like what we think for ourselves it's acceptable or for someone else but when it's us yeah then it's like oh crap I'm not going to share that like what? No course even though I'm like I'll go there yeah well you would that's why we love you I'll totally go there.

Okay, well, let's wash away our sins with wine. Cheers. And thank you for confessing to me. And this rosé is really sweet, isn't it? It is very sweet. But it's pretty good. I mean, it's like... No, it's delicious, but it's just...

It tastes like juice. It actually tastes like watermelons. Yeah. It's quite nice, but it's just sweet. It's like way too easy to go down. It is very easy to go down. Okay, so married at first sight. Yes.

I've never watched a show, but my mind is always blown at the concept because you genuinely do not meet that man until you are marrying him. That's true. But what I found out earlier is that there's a science behind it. There really is. It's like the real deal when it comes to like the scientific profiling here. Yeah. So like when I tell you, there's like questionnaires.

It's like hours at the computer answering the same question, 10 different ways to make sure you're not like cheat in the system somehow. And then somehow some people are sneaky and they still figure it out, but those are the relationships that don't work. Yes, exactly. You're like, how did you end up? But because it's been a thing. So people, some people still don't know about married at first sight, but it's this show that's become pretty popular in the fact that like it's entirely different. It's more of like a documentary in the sense that like they're genuinely trying to change the way relationships are. Like right now, I think we have everyone knows it's like 50-50 for marriage, like whether or not you stay married or get a divorce. And so the idea behind this. is can we make it like more than 50-50 and what does it require? And so ultimately like four different experts. I mean, there's a sociologist, there's a pastor, there's like a sex expert. There's like a bunch of different professionals.

Yeah. And they meet together and they help analyze all these different people and then they pair you together. But the first time you meet your spouse is at the altar. Like you know, I didn't know my husband's name. I had no idea what he looked like. Hence the breakdown. Oh, did you remember? embarrassing. Oh my God, Caitlin, it's embarrassing. I feel like the most shallow person because

I swear I must have thought like it was going to be Brad Pitt or something. I mean, I don't know why. Yeah, you probably have this like, yeah. I had this like big. Yeah. Oh, because the experts were like, oh, you know, he's so great. We love him. He's our favorite. Like, wait to you meet him. So they tell you. So they hype the person out. Well, they didn't, they weren't supposed to. Like the producers were like, oh, no, stop talking. You know, like, you're not supposed to be talking about anything. Oh. But like, they genuinely loved him so much. So I was like, oh, this guy is going to be Brad Pitt. It's got to be Brad Pitt. I mean, who else is perfect? Like, oh, my God, if I'm about to marry Brad Pitt. I can't wait to meet Brad Pitt. Jamie Pace sounds so good

I've thought about it for years That's crazy And then like The doors open And it's a very real wedding too Like I mean I'm in a wedding dress And my niece's nephew Or like down the aisle

And flower girls Yeah my sisters are my bridesmaid I took it very very seriously And thank God my husband did as well So like his brother's the best man And you know It's got its groomsmen And you know

Our eyes lock for the first time And my husband is profusely sweating, whiter than a ghost, with like this cheesy grin on his face, like, yeah. And I'm, and all his eyes, like, you know, the sides of the wedding and the aisle or whatever. His eye is all like so happy. And my side is like giving me like the thumbs up. Like, yeah, just keep going. And I literally start to cry. I couldn't stop it.

I like, because I really, I took it so seriously. Yeah. That's so crazy. That's such a weird concept. So is Bachelor. But I mean, you have something in your head. And it's a legal marriage, too. So, like, Bachelor's like, will you or will you not get engaged, right?

But this is like you are legally marrying someone after you say I do. And you meet them for the very first time. What happens if you, do you have to say I do? No. So far, no one's ever turned around. But I literally almost, I told myself I was going to go through with it. Because to me, like, I like literally put it all out in the line. Like, every, like all my baggage, I was very.

honest and transparent about. And I was like, listen, if you can find a man who will love me and my family and has like this, this and this and this, then sign me up and I'll marry him. And I just held on to that, you know, like that must be who this is, even though. So it's true love. That's so cute. I mean, kind of. It didn't, it seriously did not go down like that. But now. It took years, though. Like, it really did. It took us a very long time to fall in. Do they give you guys, like, counseling? Yeah. So that's the thing. So I knew I really, I mean, come on, I was the number one worst kisser in the Bachelor history. Clearly I needed some help, right? I can admit that. And I think that if you go on Marriette for a sight, for heaven's sakes, you have to admit that you need a little help. I mean, if you can't, I mean, come on, why else you're going to marry a complete stranger?

They don't need help in some way. Yeah, right? And I felt fortunate that I had these experts who were genuinely interested in helping. So I was like, I'm going to take their advice. And that's pretty much what you do, like, throughout the whole thing. I mean, after anybody who's listening who's watched Married at first sight will know that, like, I was a little, I was a little, I mean, I was so scared and it came off as very shallow because I wasn't immediately attracted to him. And I felt like it was so wrong. I was like, wait a minute.

This is marriage. This isn't something to play around with. Because, let's be honest, initial attraction is what usually starts a relationship. Yeah. And if you don't have that spark, then you're like, oh, there's nothing. Right. But I'm here to tell you. Yeah. Also, I do believe in friendships for me first. I do believe in falling in love after. I really do. And I would like beg to differ or I would like jump on a limb to say that maybe that is what the foundation needs to be is like friendship and trust and respect. And that's really how I like went into this. Not even because I was trying to be like, I don't know. And you know from experience. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You did. You fell in love from, like, starting with not sure. Yeah. To getting to know who a person is and falling in love with them.

I started off with, like, this is never going to work. Yeah. I guarantee it. I'm sorry. But I'll, you know, I'll do the experiment because I said I would. Right. But it's never going to work to, like, really, like, he was the most patient, like, respectful, funny. That's awesome.

And they took a shirt off. And I was like, whoa, abs. Yeah. Yeah. And just slowly. And then it was like, why was I not attracted to him kind of thing, you know? Oh, that's, yeah. Hey, look at Carly and Evan.

Yeah. The same thing happened for them. And you know what? Now that I think about it, if Sean and I met on Married at First Sight, we wouldn't have had to go through all this like drama and me like dating other guys and like, but your story is also like, it's so great. And, you know, that's the thing about love, though, is everybody has their own love story. I wouldn't change it. Yeah.

That's so true. And not only did you fall off. You have a baby out of this. You're the first married, at first sight, baby. Yeah, in America. Yeah. I think there was a couple in Australia at that. Oh, really?

Also had a baby. But, yes, we're the first couple in America to have a married at first sight baby. That is, and she's almost four months. Yes. And she is seriously the cutest thing in the world. I mean, I'm her mom, so I'm a lot. Yeah, but still, I did some creeping. She's pretty adorable.

So sweet. She's like such a happy little girl. Which helps. Yeah. I mean, don't get me wrong. She's fussy. You know, at her times. Yeah.

That's it. She's a freaking baby. Like, that's what happens. She's not fussy. She's just a baby. Yeah, exactly. That's just what they do. Yeah, exactly.

Even babies who are like so perfect still fuss. Yeah. And if you expect your baby not to fuss, well then you're a weirdo. You're unrealistic. Yes, that's right. Yeah, absolutely. And where are my notes now? So we just had a baby.

Oh, you had a baby. Yes. I'm trying to help you out. Yeah, I know. I'm like, wait, that's where. And I think you've always had this. like motherly mother nature to you because you and this is so crazy you gained custody and raised your younger siblings when you were in college yeah yeah yeah so that's part of

the baggage that I was like when for married at first sight you know that says so much about who you are as a person and what kind of mom you will be and I just think that's so you're so sweet I just want to like bow down to you like that's just come on no I honestly think that if if anybody was put in that situation like it's not like it's not like Like, I was like, oh, let me go and raise my siblings. I was just kind of, like, thrown into it. Like, my mom literally wrote a note for my siblings get off the bus at my home. And then she just kind of disappeared.

She was like, peace out for a hot minute. No, it's, you know what, like, in hindsight, I'm so thankful for, I genuinely am for everything that, that, like, we all went through because, I mean, I love my siblings. Oh, I bet. Yeah, and I feel like I grew up a lot. I mean, I could have been a promiscuous little mama in college. But instead, I was, like, the complete opposite, like, trying to take care of some kids. And so that saved me for me from the next to be. And, like, yeah.

So, and that's the thing, too, is they weren't that young. So, long story short, I mean, we were going through really hard times. Like, we were living in this, like, run-down trailer. I mean, literally leaky ceilings. I mean, hot mess. And my mom was, like, just disappearing a lot. She has, like, dependency issues. And she, like, in her defense, she has five kids, was a single mom, was beat to crap by my stepdad.

Oh, my gosh. was like in and out of jail. So it wasn't easy for her. No. And she just turned to drugs for coping mechanisms. And that was like a sour path because she just went down there and like I feel like she's never returned. But she would disappear a lot. And I was I was like 18 at the time. So I was like I'm going to get a job. I'm going to college. I'm going to get my own home. I'm out of here. But my three little siblings are still there. And when you're 18 though, I do have a little guilt that I never like took them with me. I just because their eviction notices were coming. Like it wasn't. It wasn't long before, like, you know, my mom was going to get kicked out, but my siblings.

So I, you know, but I was young. And so I went to my own little home and that's when, you know, and I left my siblings there, which I feel so bad about. My mom was, like, never there. And there's like no food. When you're 18, you kind of just. You do your own thing, which. And you run from, not that you run from problem. Well, you kind of do.

Like, you're just like, I want to figure this out for myself. Yeah. I don't want to be hurt in the situation. So I'm going to go do what I need to do. And then you ended up caring from. Yeah. Yeah. So the truth of the story is I left them first, which is terrible. But I just, I guess I just didn't know any different. And then my mom said, listen, you know, like the eviction. It was like the final eviction notice. Like the boards. Like there was, they were not. They changed the locks and everything. There was no going back into that house because my mom was so late paying, you know, the rent or whatever. So she said, can the kids get off at your house? And I was like, can the kids get off at your house. And I was like, a little two bedroom rinketing trailer myself. And they got off. And I'm telling you, it was like little house on the prairie for us. Because we had zero money. had like we had we had we had we had we had we had enough like space there was two bedrooms it was it was

like but it was like we each had our own little role like I was actually a cheerleader and I had a job and I was a full time in college wow so my sister amy lynne she was 16 and so they're a little older so my sister amyling was 16 the twins were 14 they're the two youngest and my sister amy lynn would help me like watch them until I could get home and Leah like helped she was like one of the twins yeah she would like cook dinner and help me clean I mean we all have my brother was just like a hot mess because he's a little boy. Yeah, yeah. But we all had our own little roles and we did our thing.

And, yeah, and then, you know, long story short, I ended up. I just think that's so special. Yeah. We had like a really, I mean, like, don't get me wrong. You did what you needed to do to make ends meet and to show each other the love that you needed. And I just realized I said, did I say Mother Nature earlier? Isn't that like, I don't know.

You know what I meant. Yeah, it's fine. Yeah. But you have like the, you just have always had this nurturing. Yeah. Yeah, well, you know, I, to be honest, anybody who, like, anybody who's ever, like, given a little, like, it's very, it's almost like, I won't say selfish, but, like, you feel good about it. Like, I felt good that my siblings knew they could count on me, you know? Like, I wanted to be there for them.

Like, like, and I wanted, I wanted that so bad for myself when I was younger. So I was like, you know what? I'm going to do that for them. And then it felt good. It's like, honestly, it's a little codependency. There's like, it's like a shade of gray that you should cross. But, because, like, then when they're starting to get on their own, I'm like, wait, but don't you need me still? Like, I want to help you.

you yeah but no yeah probably did so much for them at that age too just like I mean for later in life like that for their longevity of like I hope so self love and loving others and you know that's I just think that's so great that you did that and yeah yeah and that's your story yeah that's my story but that was not something that I was like you know sharing to the whole world because I was very embarrassed about it at first you know right but um well especially yeah At a young age, you think that's, like, not okay or, you know, but everybody has. Yeah. Like when you're on The Bachelor and that's where you're coming from.

And, like, Courtney Robertson is gorgeous and she's, like, gracing the cover of, like, some magazine. And then, like, the next girl has, like, this beautiful horse ranch. And she, like, talks about, like, her family get together. And I'm like, uh, and back at my home, it's me and my siblings and we literally have pots and pans collecting the leaky, like the leaks from the ceiling. Yeah, like, you just don't talk about that, you know. That makes you who you are. Yeah. And honestly, like, fast forward to eight years later where I am now, I wouldn't change a thing.

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That's Mexican for me. So, check it out at Podcast One, iTunes, or wherever you listen to Find podcast, the Anna Cirola Show. Throw on your phone. It's free. Now back to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. You have your own daughter. Yeah. You have a book.

Yes, they do. Which, like, I kind of want to read it. It's, like, literally, like, everything you shouldn't do when you're a new wife, so. Or any relationship, really. I was like a terrible wife. And where do you get the book? It's on Amazon. You're a terrible wife.

I really was. Yeah. And that's all in your book. Yeah. I mean, I was very honest about, well, first of all, like, the first time my husband and I, I was like, you're my husband. Yeah. Even though you're a stranger. Shouldn't I see your penis?

Like. And then I'm so awkward. Oh, my God. Yeah. But you know what? He probably loves you for that. If what I said next is so wrong on every single level. What?

I was like, oh, I thought it would be a little bigger. It's so wrong on every single level. I know. And the truth of the story is I was just so insecure about myself and I needed to like, I needed to like get out of the situation that you're in because I was like, oh, no, we're not actually going to go there. Like, I don't want you to think we're actually having sex. So I wanted to like de-escalate it. Yeah. Because it was our honeymoon.

Yeah, that'll do it. Yeah, that did it. Yeah, that'll do it. But he is like, first of all, like, why would I say that? Like, that's not even really what I, I mean, he has a great penis. Let me, let me clear the record. I love my husband's penis. Well, I would hope so.

But that's, no, you just said it in the first, you said it's because you were insecure and you wanted to squash the situation, which I'm pretty. But I also wanted to see his penis. Because you're like, wait, this could change ever, right there. Yeah. But that's, that's so funny. I love how honest you are. I love it. I absolutely love it. Well, I'm glad if that's all in the book, I'm definitely reading it.

Yeah, that's in the book. So don't do that. That's like my tip number one. Don't do that. Okay, so you wrote a book. You were on all these shows. You've hosted so many things. Yeah. I love hosting.

And now you guys have a new show. Yes. So tell us about that because it's with the three of you now. Yeah. So actually tonight, which by the time you guys share this podcast, it would be, but in case our new show is called Married at First Sight Jamie and Doug Plus One Yeah

And it's really It's very raw and honest And I'm almost scared to watch it Because Oh my gosh I don't want to like Get emotional or something But I don't want to Because I'm like so

Sometimes I'm like I just need to like hold together But it's just It's been a rough go for us to have a baby And And we We shared that I mean

Because when you go through pregnancy After having a loss It's like You can't even control your emotions. I can't imagine. Yeah. It's, it's tough. And so, you know, we're filming this pregnancy and, you know, inevitably, like, feelings come out. And so I, I was actually talking to Maria Menounos the other day. And she was like, oh, it's heavy. It's really heavy. And I was like, oh, so she said about your episode? Yeah. Oh. I was like, oh, what does that mean?

I haven't even seen it yet. But, you know, I'm surprised they should have given it to you to see. But in any case, yeah, I'll tell them to send it to them. Come on. What about Caitlin? Was she a chop lever? Yeah. Let her see the episode. Well, I have it. Because they let, like, press see it before they let us see it. But in any case, so I'm a little nervous to watch it.

And my girlfriends were like, oh, let's watch it together. We'll have a big thing because I, like, had them on it with me. Yeah. And I'm like, I don't think I can watch it with anyone else because it's like relive. Yeah, it's like, yeah. Reliving just the loss, I think, you know, is going to be. And then it's going to be amazing when we have our daughter. But even that was like, you know, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was

hard for me. It's like weird, the mixed emotions you have because, you know, when I saw her, I was like, you know, is this what my son would have looked like? And, you know, I, um, it's just, it's hard. And he was actually due tomorrow, December 20th was his due date. So he would be a year old. Oh, and that's, you know, you're going to think about that. And that's, yeah, that's something you will never forget. And that's something you'll think about every year. And that's so hard to have that documented because, you know, to go through that in the first place, I can can't imagine is already something nobody should ever have to experience it. So then to know you have to watch and relive.

But you know what's sad is that, and this is why I chose to be as honest and open about it, because one in four women go through a loss. It's like unbelievable to me. And the fact that there's no one out there to help another woman, like, I mean, I... The conversation is nobody talking about this with each other. Yes. We were just talking about that. And it's like there's so many things that us women.

like we could help each other out if we just shared a little more and stopped like trying to, I don't know, like hide it because we're embarrassed or shamed or like don't want the awkward conversation. But what if the awkward conversation turns into something that's actually like meaningful and helpful and supportive. Yeah. So inevitably like I don't, you know what it's like when you're filming. The camera's just there. So I don't think I could have avoided it anyways. No, you can. But that's the thing is having, you know, I always believe in certain things like the fact that you went through this and that. that it is documented, it's probably going to help so many people. I really hope so. I really hope so. I really going to, like, meet people out of it that can be therapeutic for you and that you can form some sort of support group of women who have gone through this. Yeah. Yeah, I, you know, I remember after we lost, you know, our son, I would literally just sit on the couch, like, in the dark and just, like, sob. Like, and then I felt like an idiot.

Because I'm like, what are you doing? Are you kidding me? Of course. It's like, there's just, I just felt like, I didn't know where to go. I felt like just like at this deep dark hole that I was, and I just honestly, I was like, how would I ever be happy again? I never felt like I could be happy again. And I felt like the only thing to fix it because like one day you're pregnant and you feel this, you know, this baby inside you. And then the next is just all gone.

That's crazy. And so I cannot imagine. Yeah. It's crazy. So in any case, then I just felt like I had to be pregnant again. And then like every month trying and, oh, God, and like every negative test, like you feel like. the world's against you. And I was probably at like the lowest point of my life when, you know, when we were trying and then we found out we were pregnant again. And here my daughter

is four months old. Oh, this makes me so happy that you have that and you deserve it. Thank you. And it's, you know, that is right there your story shedding light on the subject, but also saying like there is hope for people as well. Well, that's the thing is that when I was going through it, I, first of all, I had no idea how many women went through it. And then I, so I would blog about it because it was like a little piece of therapy for me to writing has always been very therapeutic for me and so I would blog about it because like if you try to talk about a loss like even with my husband like he you know he means so well but he just didn't quite get it the same way and then even like some of my girlfriends they just had never experienced it so like

they don't know what to say and then it's awkward altogether so I had like no outlet and I would literally just blog and then I would get these emails from other women who have gone through it and they would tell me about they suffered a loss, but now they have like two quote unquote rainbow babies and that's like a baby after a loss. And like all these women would share and it gave me so much hope. I'm like, oh my God.

Yeah, exactly. And so I am hoping and praying that our show will hopefully, like if for a woman who is sitting on that couch sobbing alone in the dark and feels like a freaking loser when she realizes that she's been sitting all day, I've been there. I know what it's like. And if they can watch a show and be like,

listen, there is hope. I mean, there are so many people who go for like, go through infertility, well, you know, with like Whitney, that's her job. Yeah, yeah, I've learned a lot about that kind of thing. Yeah, didn't you freeze your aches? I froze my eggs, yeah. Yeah, good girl. Yeah.

Yeah. So, anyways, it's, it's very, I guess it is heavy. I guess it is very heavy, but. But that's part of your story. Yeah. And, and you've probably inspired so many other people to have hope and. I hope so that's the goal. And to have conversation about it and support one another.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. There's so many things that people need to talk about. It's true. It's so many subjects that could get people through. a lot. Yeah. You know,

I wish I could have a guest on every podcast that could share like something like of a deep story that could get someone through something. Yeah. Because if I can reach like a large group of women to support each other, I just think that's so important. Yeah. But I do love how, you know, times are changing and it's like a woman's world. Yeah, that's right.

And we are starting to, you know, talk about more things and go there. And so I'm, yeah, I'm, people should. watch your show. Oh, thank you, Caitlin. Yeah. I'm excited for you and for everything that's coming for you. Thank you. And, oh, we didn't do Canyon Ops. Oh, my gosh. Oh, we have time for that. Yeah. So we were saying, you know,

there's a lot of moms out there. Yeah. And a lot of people telling moms what to do. Yeah. And what they should and shouldn't do. Oh, my gosh. I can't imagine because I don't have kids. I'm not a mom, but all of my friends are. My best friends in the world I feel like it even happens with, like, doggy moms, though. Oh, how hell yeah, it does.

Like at the doggy park. And it's like, oh, my God. Tucker got kicked out of the dog park the other day because he was too old. What? Yeah, because the other dogs were, like, ganging up on him. And they told him, like, this is for the feisty dogs. Like, I know. It's the saddest thing.

Tucker is spicy, too. I wasn't even, I wasn't there. And he told me, and I got so, like, heated over it. Because I'm like, yeah, that's screwed up. I'm like, but do. Especially in New York because it's hard to find doggy parks. Like, you have to walk. A couple blocks.

It's so sad. I'm like, but he's the nicest. Actually, he's pretty feisty with other dogs. But I can only imagine what it's going to be like when I'm, like, terrified for one, I'm so excited, but also terrified for when I have babies because, like, strangers' opinions on social media already pissed me off. And I can't imagine the door I'm about to open when I have a child. It's like a can of bad worms, but you know what? You just have to, like, tune out. Yeah, that's exactly what I'm going to do.

But it sounds, like, you know what it's like. It's so much easier something done. Oh, I just want to, sometimes I'm just like, but I've got to say that my followers, like the, like I call them my friends. Yeah, friends. Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's good. France. It's good, right?

Friends. Friends. They go with Donna and Rick. And Rick. And Rick. And, Donna and Rick, we're all friends. France. They, I mean, like, I feel like my social.

It's a pretty safe place for me to be able to post because if someone says something negative, I have like a 10 people be like, don't you dare. Yes. And I'm like, I love you ladies so much. And I like, literally like, I read every single comment. Do you do you do you do? No. Well, you have more followers than me, so it's probably more difficult. I go through it sometimes, but sometimes I'm like, I love how honest you are too, though.

I mean, it's so good that you're so honest. Well, people piss me off. Yeah. And if you piss me off, I'm going to let you know about it. Well, you should. But you know what my husband says, and I'm sure you've heard this too, is like, for the one person who says anything negative. There's like a hundred more who are positive. But it's weird to, in anyway, like, if somebody was like, oh my gosh, Caitlin, you're so pretty.

I'm like, I don't know what to say. Yeah. But when people are like, hey, Caitlin, you have. this wrong with you. I'm like, oh, I'm going to stand up for myself. Yeah. So it's so hard because I do, of course I notice all the compliments and of course that like makes me feel so good. Yeah. But I also like, I don't want to get self-worth from people on the internet. Yeah. But I do want to stand up against bullies. Yes. Because I like to stand up for myself and I like to also let them know that that's not okay. Yeah. And it's funny because I get many opportunities

to do so. Yes. Isn't that so sad? It's like, whatever happens. happen to women supporting women. Seriously, though, like, don't sit behind your computer and think that I'm not a human being on the other side, going to read your comment, and it's not going to affect me. Like, it's, yeah. And then I'm like, if I call them out and they learn and never do it again, I feel like I did something good there. That's a really good point. And also, like, like, we were saying, I don't know if it was on this one or the one before that's gone now, our podcast. But, you know, when you have a child, she really does, like, he or she, they're so impressionable and they, like, look up to you and like as a mom or even like honestly as another woman in this world to like see

that like maybe you'll inspire someone else to stand up for herself you know exactly because no one we should all be able to have enough of a backbone to be like don't you treat me like that exactly like I don't tell you to go out and you know get on slim fast diets or because you think on you know what you know like oh yeah even though like all these people like their words are so empty to me because I know I'm not too skinny I know that this is my body and I know that I'm okay with my body and all these things. So when they say these things, it's empty. Like, I don't take it like...

Personally. No, you shouldn't. Absolutely not. But whatever. At least you're a confident, strong woman, and you don't have to deal with it. Yeah, I'm like, okay, I want to. Yeah. Can you not?

So let's do Can You Not? Okay. Shamers. I mean, there are so many. Can you not? Can you not? So many. I mean, I.

I mean, I told you I wanted to have a list because I feel like I'm going to forget them now that you put me on the spot. Do you have a list? I don't have, I didn't have time to write a list. Okay, I'll start it off. It'll probably inspire you. Okay. This is, again, I turned to, um, I like to call them my vinos. I did call them viner's, but now vinos is good because it's like vinoes and vinos and

so I turned to them for some. So some, a girl said, can you not touch my pregnant belly? You would not touch my belly if there wasn't a baby in there. It's still weird. I'm not going to lie. I don't mind it when, when I was. pregnant. I loved being pregnant. Well, I felt really guilty because I was like, I touched pregnant. I love it. I'm like, yeah, you want to touch my baby? Oh, she's moving. Feel. Oh, okay. So I think it's a matter of opinion. But, okay, so let me find one. Okay. I mean, this is for the moms who have toddlers. Okay. Okay. Because I think this is going to be me in the McDonald's drive-thru with my toddler. Oh, yeah. Do people judge for that? Oh, my God, 100%. Like, if it's not organic and like, which, by the way, I do want to be all organic. But I won't judge you if you're going through the McDonald's line.

And, like, if I end up having to, like, go through the McDonald's line, my kid has the freaking French fry, forgive me. Like, I ate McDonald's. This is no, maybe this can be one of my confessions. No joke. I'm not lying. I'm not exaggerating. High school, which in where I grew up was grades 10, 11, 12. Okay.

Every single day of my life, I ate McDonald's. every single, without fail. That's disgusting, Caitlin. I'm talking every day. Everyone who knows me, my family can tell you this is the truth. Every single day. You know what? Women are just jealous of you because if I ate McDonald's every single day.

But I was also dancing like seven days a week. Oh, so you're burning so many calories. And like five hours on Saturdays and Sundays. That's insane. I danced every single day. Good for you. I want to see. There's like hidden truths about you that like, first of all, you dance, what?

Yeah. Do you dance on Broadway? No, I wish I did. Oh, my God. That was my actual job title they gave me on Bachelor was dance instructor. Oh, really? Which was funny because I really wasn't instructing dance at that time. But I did from, my mom was a professional ballerina and I grew up dancing my whole life. Oh, my gosh.

And it's why I moved. And yes, every single day. So what are you more passionate about singing or dancing? Now singing. Yeah. Before, if you asked me like five years ago, I would have said dancing. I mean, I feel like, see, I'm a TV host. So sometimes I like interview people.

and I want to put you on the spot and be like, girl, sing. Oh, hell no. No? I want to turn this table around and interview you. You should do that sometime. Oh, you can interview me. Okay. But I would be like, girl, let me hear you sing.

Yeah, no. Why not? I bet you're really good and you don't even know it. I'm okay. I don't think I'm bad. I bet you're really good then. I think I'm okay, but I refuse, like, especially in a situation like this. I'm like, this is the shittiest mic for me to like put my voice into the universe right now.

I need to say, I'm not. I need to sound real good if I'm going to put out my voice. All right. But I swear I will soon. Once I put like a song out or something, then you can put me on the spot and I'll sing. But I don't want it to, my first to be like, jingle bells. I'll do it for you. Jingle bells, jingle all the way.

Pretty good. Thank you. A very good falsetto. Is that what that is? I don't know. Okay, good. I have no idea. Oh, we're on can you not?

Oh, yes, can you not? Okay. Can you not tell me my baby is cold? Oh, my God, that's a really good one, too. Or can you not tell me how to burp my baby? How do people do that? Oh, my God. I had someone the other day be like, don't they really like to be held like this when you're burping him?

I'm like, I am her mother. Yeah. Do you think I don't know how to burp my baby? I'm pretty sure I've tried all ways of burping and this one works best for me. Yeah, I get the bubble. Yeah. So. Can you not?

Can you not tell me what you did for your baby 30 years ago? Things change. That's a really good one, too. Oh, my God. First of all, 30 years ago, they recommended sleeping on the belly. And now they recommend sleeping on the back. So, yeah, things change a lot. Things change.

But can you not judge me if my baby sleeps on the belly? Not that she does, but I have one of my coworkers, you know, I'm a nurse. I work in labor delivery. And she, I'm not going to say her name, but she lets her baby sleep on his belly because that's the only way he'll sleep. And she's like, I can't tell a soul that because I'm a nurse in labor and delivery. And, yeah. But I have a better can you not? Because this is very personal to me.

Ready for it. Can you not judge me if the baby weight's not falling off even though I'm nursing? I meant to talk to you about. this. It isn't even in my notes. I love your body positivity messages on Instagram. Thank you. I love that you're so realistic about baby weight and when it comes off and how it comes off or when it doesn't, like, and that you're proud of your body because one thing I did learn from freezing my eggs is that I am so proud of my body. Yeah. And even when, you know, everyone's like, oh, your body's so tight and small. I'm like, yep, I still have insecurities. Like, of course. I'm so

tiny. I still have a major cellulite. I'm. I wouldn't believe that unless I saw it. I do. I really do. Yeah. And I, there's certain things that, like, but I am so proud of what my body is capable of doing that I'm like, why don't women focus more on how we are freaking heroes and beasts? Yeah. And our body is capable of growing a human being. A human being. And just everything that comes along after. And so, yes. And then pushing that thing out. Pushing. Like, we are heroes. Yeah, we really are. The other day, I was looking at my dog. daughter because, you know, obviously, I grew her in my womb. Yeah. In my womb. In my uterus. Yeah.

And then she came right out. Yeah. But, like, I'm exclusively nursing and she's had nothing but my breast milk. And she's so chunky and full and happy. And I'm like, how? You're like, I've kept this child alive. Yeah. And how?

Like, how is this possible that me and, like, just whatever? I like, what is breast milk for heaven's sakes? Because how is that, like, growing a baby? But, I mean, she is, she's a big girl. You and she, you know, she is growing and healthy. because of your body. Yeah, which is nuts, right? Like, you're right.

Why don't we focus on that more than like, I mean, I do have 20 pounds lose. And I've got to be honest. At first, I was like, you're going to lose 20 pounds. Yeah. It's ridiculous from looking at you, but okay. Oh, yeah. But anyways, I cannot fan to any of my clothes, like, none of them, which is. Because you've just had a baby.

It's true. And if it was someone else, I, this is the thing. I come out after having her. And I'm like, why do women complain? I feel so strong. And I'm super human. I push this baby out and oh my god I'm in so much pain I can't even sit but wow I feel strong yeah and then like you know I'm like fast forward to like now and it's been like almost four months

and I'm like am I going to be that girl who is like my baby's like two or like five years old and I'm like I just had a baby this is the baby way but I was like dasking to my can you not like can you not judge me if I'm that girl my baby's five years old and I'm like I just had a baby this is the baby way I'm going to lose it and who cares if you don't you know like If you're healthy and your baby is healthy, why are we not like, wow, good for you. Yeah, it's so true. You know what's funny is that I really genuinely believe that. And like I work in, like I said, I work in labor and delivery. So I work with these women all the time.

And I say that to them. But when it's your body, I get it now. Like I'm like, oh, yeah, I get it. Like you just don't feel sexy. Because everybody's so hard on themselves. Yeah. And you feel, I genuinely feel like sluggish. I don't feel in shape.

Like I don't feel like I'm like if my daughter was like, you need to run to save my life. I'd be like, okay, here we go, honey. People need to have more patience with themselves. It's true. Because for nine months, you grew a child and you think that in three months you're just going to look the same as you did. But no, your body changed over nine months. Give yourself nine months to a year, to two years, to three years, to four years, to whatever you need to, in a healthy way, feel good. I love that.

Preach it, sister. And then as soon as I have a baby and the weight's not gone after three years, I'm going to, I'm literally going to, like, hit, like, stop. rewind and then play your words to yourself i know i know i'll have to preach to myself for a while there but yeah that's do people comment on that to you um well our like i said our show is coming out and so there's a commercial on right now and i'm not even kidding you yeah she looks so fat she she's gained so much weight like i am like in the commercials i'm still nine months pregnant i am nine months pregnant people like leave me alone i'm not even kidding you That makes me want to vomit.

But you know what? Like, I am, I feel like I'm a little proud of myself because a little 23-year-old me on The Bachelor would be like crying in a corner. Of course. But the 31-year-old mom who just pushed a baby out of my hoo-ha. Yeah, you're like, actually. I do look a little fat. F you. Like, I'm growing a baby.

Yeah. Oh, I love it. Yeah. I love it. Yeah, whatever. That's, man, doesn't, your mentality and just confidence level, everything just changes. Every year you just get better and better. Yeah. And for everyone who's in their 20s right now listening, let me tell you, the 30s are like the best. Like, don't fret it. I fretted it. Didn't you? Were you like, oh, my God, I'm going to be 30? Good for you. I'm, I'm, good for you. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm not. Yeah, you're a long ways way. So stop worrying about that now. But, yeah, I was a little worried about 30 because I was like, oh, I couldn't, 30 was so old when I was in high school, you know, like 30 was so old. And now I'm like, oh, God, the 30s are the best.

30s are. You know yourself so much better. And you get better every year. Yeah, it's true. You become more confident. Yeah. And that's what I heard about 40s too. So I'm going to try and not fret it because I've heard that actually 40s is when you really don't give any Fs. Oh, my God.

Bring the 40s on. Yeah. That's what I've heard. Yeah. So are you guys looking for a yummy alternative to boring old hummus or looking for something a little more interesting to snack on with your favorite lines? Yes. Lantana hummus has you covered. Lantana brings thoughtful and bold flavor combinations to the hummus category with

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I don't care. I just like it. Go to lanetanafoods.com for more info on flavors, locations, and more. So I wanted to ask you a few questions just because some people wanted to know, even though I feel like we have talked about a lot of things that people had questions for anyways. Yeah. But we'll do questions from listeners. Okay.

Stephanie Hortzman, does she have any thoughts on why other marriages on the show? show after the first season have all ended in divorce except for one from season five. Yeah, I have a lot of thoughts on that. Okay, cool. So married at first night was really successful in season one. So there's two couples still together, myself and Courtney and Jason. And then it's been like part of my frankness, but like a shit show since then. Like it, it like hurts my heart to watch it because I know what can come from it.

And I genuinely believe that it takes two people who really want to be married and who really know that it's not going to happen overnight. like you can't yeah it takes so much work and like you know even quote unquote fairy tales like they have like their struggles until they get to the ending when that then then it becomes the fairy tale like don't go on don't expect to get like this easy peasy marriage you know like what's like what are you crazy actually not a thing it's not even realistic in any sense and i feel like people and i feel like they don't put the work in like they don't want to and i get you know i'm not them so i can't like you know i don't know what it's really like but i feel like like I've been a couple people who've said, oh, I want what you and Doug have and, oh, when I saw what you and Doug have, I signed up because I was like, oh, I want that. Listen, what Doug and I have took so much effing work and like, like, serious tears and like, you know. It's, it probably had to be next to impossible to get to where you are at. Yeah. But that's, I feel like you take any couple anywhere, any relationship, bachelor, bachelor, bachelor's at, anyone. Any one.

Any, Joe Schmo and her, you know, his, like. girlfriend on the road like they're everybody and if you don't put in that work they're all going to fail so you it's not that there's reasons actually no there is reason it's because you guys put in the work it's true we didn't we truly didn't give up on each other like and even when we weren't genuinely in love we wanted marriage which is the only a little like a little lame that we wanted that but we did and like if you have two people who really really want that yeah and can kind to see the light in the tunnel and they're willing to work, I think, because let me tell you, for the first, like, year of our marriage, it was literally, it's just like dating, like,

but backwards because you're already married. But, yeah, I feel like, I feel like they kind of maybe anticipate, like, love a little too soon. And it's like, hello, that's not the real world. And also love doesn't mean fairy tale. Right. And love doesn't mean honeymoon phase. Forever. You get deep and you fight and you have like the lowest and low points and you throw your clothes in a suitcase sometimes and then you come back from it because you will fight for that relationship. That is love. That's love. Like whatever this fairy tale like like honeymoon phase, that is not even love. That's just like puppy love. I used to get so sad over like the honeymoon being over and one of my girlfriends, Breesho always told me like, but that's not real love.

It's not. Real love is like getting past that and making things work. Yeah, real love is like the point when you feel like you're never going to survive and then you do. And then you do. And then that feeling you have once you get over that hump is like. Like, it's more love than, like, puppy love. Like, it's just, like, a better feeling. Yeah. So you got to get through that. But you got to have two people to do that.

Exactly. And that's the hard part. That's, I think, why Sean and I have worked, too, is that we are two people who will do anything to make this work. Even if it gets to, like, like, people say the same thing. Oh, I want what you guys have. And I'm like, crazy because you don't, we don't know what happens. Yeah. Behind the doors.

Yeah. And that's, but that's real. Yeah. And that's something that we will always get through together. That's, I can't wait for your guys as wedding. Yeah. I can't either. baby someday. Oh, probably before the wedding. Hey. Hey, hope. Not now, though, because I'm drunk.

Um, oh, Victoria Weston wants to know what made you go on married at first sight. So you want marriage. Well, yeah, that pretty much answers it. But also, I, like, I knew I was a girl hurt and needed some help. Like, I didn't have a good example of relationships and love. And, like, I didn't have anyone to really go to to talk to about it. So when they said there's experts who wanted to help, I was like, yeah, sign me up. Actually, yeah, that's a good example. Yeah, that's a good. sounds pretty cool. I mean, yeah. I mean, I was like, how much you have to pay? Wait, they're going to do that for free for me? Okay, yeah. And look what you got out of it. I know. I'm lucky. So beautiful. Rachel, no last name, wants to know if you could star in another show, reality or scripted, which one would it be? Oh, my God. Putting it out into the universe, I've always wanted to be on Dancing with Stars. Oh, Paige. Do you want to be on Dancing with Stars? Hell yeah. Oh, we can't be on the same time, though, because I feel like you. Yes, exactly. And I just had a baby. We could go on next to each other and support each other. You know what?

I was like, I loved the idea of going on after the show just because I think everyone else did. They all, I feel like so many people from The Bachelor do, right? Well, you didn't hear the story then because I didn't. I got accepted and I had a contract signed, but Mike Fleiss wouldn't let me. But that's... Wait. We could talk about that after everyone's heard me complain about this so many times. That's messed up.

That I don't like even putting the negative. I know it's so bad. I don't even like putting that out into the universe anymore because I'm like, I'm so thankful now because I'm on Broadway. That is like a way bigger dream to me than anything. Yeah, girl. And so I'm like, everything happens for a reason. How long, like, does the contract last?

Like, can you? Are you ever out? Like, where he came out now. Oh, so they could. So Dancing with the Stars could potentially reach out to you after you're done with Broadway and ask for you to film the next season. They could. And then you would be in L.A. You'd be hopping a flight from New York to L.A.

I'm putting it out into the universe because I'm really not ready right now. I need to have, like, another baby. Yeah. Yeah. So you go first and I'll support you, girl. Okay. Thank you. I feel like, yeah, I'm just so happy to be on Broadway now that I'm like, oh, my gosh.

Thank God for this path that I was on. See, that's amazing. Good for you. But I'm putting it out there for you. Your next stint is going to be Dancing with Stars. I'm not mad if you put it out there. Do you, oh, this is from Amanda Hewler. Does Jamie and Doug have pre-baby bucket list before the second baby?

That is so funny because that was a thing for us. We had a pre-baby pre-baby bucket list. My husband did. Oh. It was like freaking real, too. Really? He wanted to swim with sharks and ghost hunting. We did too.

Oh, he did. Where? Like in South Africa. Oh, cool. Where'd you go? Hawaii. Oh, that sounds like. We didn't even go on a, did you have a tank?

Like a cage? Yeah. Yeah, we weren't. Really? Yeah. Sean and I went in the middle of nowhere. We were both so hungover. Oh, do you ever crazy?

Yes. We were both so hungover. We went, we didn't even sign anything. We just went with these, like, locals on a boat out to the middle and just jumped in. Oh, my God. I'm crazy. You're crazy. And don't tell my husband that story because then he's going to want to do that.

It was the craziest thing I've ever been a part of. And while I was in there, I'm like, wait, what am I still drunk? I'm swimming with sharks. And then, like, it was the wildest thing I've ever done. They're, like, looking you in the eye and swimming around you. I wish you had, like, a video of that. I do. You do?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll show you. You should put that on YouTube or something. That's crazy. Yeah, we actually should. It's the wildest thing I've ever been a part of. That's nuts. We're, like, swimming around and honestly, looking them in the eyes. And at one point, I was like, they tell you to not show fear, because that's when they start

questioning you. But how do you not have fear? I was so calm once I got in there and seen them and I was like I saw the way they reacted to me being calm and they just were like curious and then at one part I was like I'm going to have a panic attack because now I'm like in my head and so I was like and I panicked and got out of the water and so anyways but yeah it was so wild but anyways so you did it in where was South Africa yeah um wait what was the other bucket list thing you said okay so he had like so many things on his bucket list but one was like to live live with indigenous people, like an indigenous tribe. Yeah. So we like, we literally took like this little car the size of like this room, basically. It was an itty-bitty car, like a bug or something in South Africa and drove from like one area to the next like crazy. That's awesome.

Yeah. And then he wanted to like swim with sharks. He wanted to go on a real ghost hunt. He's really into that. Did you guys do that yet? We did do that. We did everything on his pre-baby. Is this on your show?

Yeah. It's on married at first sight the first year, I think the second season. Okay. Amazing. And then we had, and then we had our baby. Yeah. Oh, my God. I was like, I'll do anything. We went skydiving. Did you? Oh, that's on my list. Yeah. It's really, like, not worth it. Like, I don't know. Like, for me, it's like, why are you going to go up in a tin can? And then, like, jump out and, like, hope the parachute opens.

Like, you, like, you see the view in the tin can. Just stay in the tin can. The plane that you go up in is, like, a tin can. It's so, like, a flimsy and small. stay in the plane. You just stay in the plane and look at the view. And at least you're like their chances of surviving are like so much higher. But we did it. And my husband immediately was like, oh, I want to do it again. I was like, I'm never doing it again. We're like, no, we cross it off the list already. We're done. Yeah. That was me swimming with sharks. I'm like we did never doing that again. Same. Oh, good for you for guys. You guys do all this stuff together? That's awesome. Yeah. So do you have anything else on the list before baby two? Oh, before baby two. That's the question. For me, I always wanted to take, I mean, it's not really on the list. I'll still have baby number two. I kind of want to. I kind of want to. I. I kind of want to. I. have baby number two. I'm like, I have this weight to lose. So I may as well just like get knocked up again. Because like, I don't want to lose all the weight and then get knocked up again and then have the baby and gain all the weight again to have to lose it again. Let's just get pregnant again. Yeah. So there's really nothing on the list. I mean, but I would love. I mean, you've done a lot. Yeah. Yeah. But I would love to take like a cross-country trip or go to Australia. I've always wanted to Australia. I would too. Yeah. You've just done so much and

accomplished so much and you've like came from your trailer park when you were young to where you are today and gone through struggles and ups and downs and so many success stories too and yeah I hope that like

you've a little girl in a trailer park is listening to this right now and she's like if she can do it I can do it because it's so true like you don't have to be a product of your environment you really don't and not that a trailer park is bad because there's some really great trailer parks out there one of my best friends grew up on Yeah, absolutely. And she was great family. Yeah. Yeah. It's honestly a really great way to save some money because it's less expensive than owning a home. But when you're coming from the rundown trailer park, you know, where I'm from, like, and you're kind of, it's true, it's a cycle, you know, like it's like my, to be honest, like my grandma, my mom, my sister, me, you know, it's a cycle. But you don't have to be a part of that cycle. You can break it. And I hope that little girl, like some little girl somewhere is listening to this and will really know that. Because it's true.

And then you're going to raise, you know, a daughter in such a, you know, you've learned from all of your experiences that she has such a unique experience from you. And she'll grow up. She already has a beautiful young lady. Thank you. Yeah. We love her. I already love her and it's just from Instagram. Thanks.

But yeah, just thank you for coming on the podcast and sharing your stories because I know you've inspired people just through your own social media world and shows. But now, hopefully you get some more people from this podcast that, you know, you can help them and they can help you. Yeah, I would love that. That would be awesome. Absolutely. So tell us where we can find you, your blog, everything. So I am on, I'm Jamie N. Otis on like at Jamie N. Otis on Instagram and Twitter and on Facebook. It's just Jamie and Otis.

And my website is jamie Otis.com. And yeah, we're going to be our show, Meredith at first sight, Jamie and Doug Plus One. So awesome. Tuesday, December 19th, at 8 o'clock. I feel like this is going to come out after that. Yeah, it definitely is because that's today. Oh, is today the 19th? Yeah, today's the 19th.

And our show premieres tonight. It's Tucker's birthday. Yeah. Oh, oh, yeah. Wait, on what channel? On Lifetime. Oh, I'm watching. You're going to watch it.

I'll record it because I'll be on my show. I was going to say, don't you have Broadway? Yeah. You big star. I'll record it. Oh, that's so awesome. Yeah, and then every Tuesday's at 10 o'clock on Lifetime, our show will be on. Okay.

10 o'clock Eastern Time? Yes. Oh, I'll be home. home for that. Yay! Awesome. Awesome, Caitlin. Okay, you guys, here's your sponsor review so you can write down all the great deals I've gotten you through this podcast. There's Bright Sellers, 50% off your first box, brightsellers.com slash off the vine. Join the LaCroy community on social at at LaCroiwater, or check us out on LaCroiwater.com. Lantana Hummus, go to lantanafoods.com for more info on flavors, locations, and more. And Amazon. Keep the podcast free while you shop.

on.com slash shop slash Caitlin Bristow. One last question for you. Sure. What animal jumps higher than a house? Oh my God. Do you put everyone through this? Because I have no idea.

I would say a kangaroo, but I mean, I'm sure that's probably like, is that really it? No, it's not it. Is it? No, it's all animals. Houses can't jump. Oh, my gosh. Are you kidding me right now? I'm like, she probably puts everyone through this.

I don't know these questions. My husband would have gotten that. Oh, my God. Oh, that's so funny. You, that all, whippersnapper, you? Whippersnapper. Oh, my gosh, I'm so recycling. Whippersnapper, that's such a good man.

A little whippersnapper. Oh, my gosh. Yes. I love that reaction. Okay, you guys, you know the drill. If you don't want to miss an episode, you can download the Podcast One app. Go to Podcasts1.com. Subscribe on Apple Podcast.

Please leave a rating and a review. I'm desperate here. Yeah. I mean, I think this is easily worth a five-star review. Five and a half, even though that's not an option. I mean, 10. Yeah, 10. Just give us the five stars and then comment and say 10 stars.

Yeah, that's all. Give us some self-worth here. But we're not going to get it from your stars. No, uh-uh. Nope. You know what? I'm not desperate. I don't need your stars.

No. Yes, I do. But give me the stars. Okay. Okay, I'm Caitlin Bristow and I will see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening to Oscar Vine with Caitlin Briscoe. Get new episodes every Tuesday exclusively on podcast1.com, the podcast one app and subscribe on Apple Podcasts. So if you are like me in the same position right now and you're looking to buy a car,

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