Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Jen and Emmalee of Shrink Chicks

Episode Date: December 22, 2020

Kaitlyn is joined this week by licensed marriage and family therapists AND fellow podcasters Jennifer Chaiken and Emmalee Bierly of Shrink Chicks! The ladies talk about the most common days of the week and instances that couples fight, quarantine exhaustion and differing family dynamics through a pandemic. They give tips and tricks on how to have difficult conversations based around safety through the holidays and how to mentally prepare for the upcoming year! GEICO - Go to Geico.com and in 15 minutes you could be saving 15% or more on car insurance    HEAD & SHOULDERS - Self-care made simple    HEADSPACE - Go to Headspace.com/VINE for a free 1 month trialSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Podcast One presents Off The Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Caitlin is creating a space where girls and gents can feel empowered to be themselves. Get ready for lots of laughs, tabby topics, on filtered advice, and wine. Lots of wine. Get ready to shake things up. Here's Caitlin. Welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow.

Today on the podcast, I have two amazing. therapist joining me for a second time. The last time they were on the pod was earlier this year, right in March, right when we had no clue what we'd be living through in the midst of this pandemic. These ladies are the co-founders and owners of the West Chester Therapy Group and hosts of the Shrink Chicks podcast. They are so generous with their platform and practice and they continue to help people wade through all kinds of emotional and mental blocks. In this episode, we discuss how to navigate the holiday season, COVID edition, tips and tricks to stay happy and healthy going into 2021. I walked away from this one with so much more awareness and knowledge,

and they're just so funny. These ladies are just so funny and so genuine, so down to earth. I hope you enjoy today's episode with Emily and Jennifer, aka shrink chicks. Hey, do you own or rent your own home? I'm sure you do, and I bet it can be hard work, but you know what's easy is bundling policies with Geico. Geico makes it easy to bundle your homeowners and renters insurance along with your auto policy, which is a good thing, too, because you already have so much to do around your home. Go to geico.com, get a quote, and see how much you could save. It's Geicoeasy.

Visit guyco.com today. That's geico.com. Now back to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Okay, it's so good to see you both. It's funny because nine months ago, we were like, you know what? This is going to be over soon. And here we are. We were like, let's give you some tips of advice so we can get through the next month.

Yeah. thinking like two months max two months max yeah we never would have thought that now all of this later and we were saying we don't know if we would give all of the same stuff because i think we talked a lot about being productive and now we say now is the time to rest yeah we are all tired especially you kately you've been quite busy you should definitely rest in a lot i've been a little busy but i was saying actually because of being so busy and doing the dance show I was like I forgot that there's a pandemic going on like it was such a good distraction for three of the months and you know we were getting tested every single day and I was kind of like yeah whatever you just swab your nose every day that's just part of life now and then coming home and feeling so lazy which I'm definitely okay with but I just feel so lazy I cannot get out of bed I like is pandemic fatigue a real thing? Yes. Oh my gosh. Yes, it absolutely is because we can also have fatigue from our job. I mean, really for anything, right? So what we're just talking about is so much exhaustion and

the burnout from it. And the intake of information that we have had over these past however many months. We don't know. I don't know what year it is, what day it is. Yeah. But also on top of that, like you have been dancing so much of course you're exhausted okay that makes me feel but also it must have been so good for your mental health to be so active and to be like working towards this goal what a good time to be dancing it's a very good time to do joyful movement right right like it was like such joyful movement and wasn't about um weight loss or anything else or you were really just moving for this amazing experience and we should do that all things in life. Absolutely. And we can talk about that in terms of the holidays. How to

have some joyful time, man. Yeah. That's, I mean, I definitely want to get into that because you're right. It was just, you just, I got to go and dance. And as hard as it was to, to, you know, get up and do that for as long as I did, it was still like, without realizing it doing something that I love every day. And I feel like I'm having like the burnout of my body coming down from all of that, but also mentally because I just don't have anything to like, I mean, I have things to wake up for, of course, but I've, I don't have like that structure and that routine anymore that I had for so long that I was so used to every day. And now I'm like, and I think we talked a lot about that when COVID first hit. Is that like, okay, how do you

keep this structure? How do you keep this routine? And then I think that after a while you're doing the same thing every single day. Like, there are so many days where I'm like, I have no idea what day it is. Yeah. No, I got a hat made that said, what day is it? It's actually the name of my girlfriend's podcast, but it made so much. I was like, get me one of those hats because the amount of times I say, what day is it today?

And we were saying before, it was off the record, but we were saying that we should have invested in Zoom, you were like, things that, advice I would give now, versus advice I would have given on this podcast nine months ago. What did you say? Well, I said up your antidepressants, right? If you're on some SSRIs, it's time to double that. So it's for sure. I said probably if you don't have it, get a medical marijuana card,

get every type of wine shipment service you can have, and then invest in lounge sets. You were unaware of the importance of lounge sets. And then you said, yes, I've worn the sweatpants. But investing in Zoom, investing in Zoom. investing a zoom gosh what yeah and heat lamps i think heat lamps we should have invested into oh like what do you mean like the vitamin d lights or whatever or do you mean like what okay that's actually a great point i'm not what i'm thinking but a hundred percent i have one of those lamps they're

incredibly helpful we're also on the east coast so it's very cold here okay yes so restaurants are really struggling because and there's no indoor dining there's no indoor dining and so heat lamps are a huge thing right now, very hot, literally. I didn't even think about that with no indoor dining and, wait, where are you guys again? We're Philly. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't even think about that with indoor dining not being a thing. And so do they have heat lamps everywhere outside? Everywhere. But they don't really do much, you know? Like they don't really. It's a placebo effect. It is, right. You're like, ooh, I'm so warm in your body's shaking. Yeah. like you can't feel your toes and you have hypothermia but like you really want to support that

restaurant so you got to do it absolutely yeah we got to support what's important that's the saddest part because i mean i used to work in the restaurant industry for so long and i know that like obviously that's just like you you never first of all you never think anything like this is going to happen and restaurant businesses like that's such um like speaking of things to do for joy that was one of my things that i would do for joy was going to dinner like that that that's something that I love to do. I love finding new restaurants. I love all kinds of food. I love trying new cocktails and drinks and wine. And I just feel like that's a joyful thing that people look forward to doing. And to know that that's like something that you can't do these days is so

depressing. There's this, there's this girl in Nashville. Her name's Keaton Claus. And she decorated my house for Christmas. And it's like her business. She'll come in and decorate and then she takes everything down and puts it away. It's incredible. But she is saying that she'll also go in to people's homes, like, masked up and she won't be around them. And she'll set up their living room like a date night and like do candles and like make it like a look like a restaurant and really fancy. And then people can, you know, do their dinner or whatever and have like even just their living room made over to be more romantic and an intimate setting like that. How great is that? I was just going to say, I think that like when you go to restaurants, it's a good way to

next with in your relationships too and not have that to try to do a fake date night at home is really hard yes because you don't do all the work right and you just laundry downstairs like when in the restaurant absolutely it's just no true it is one of those things that it anytime jason and i are like budding heads or like communication isn't there if we go have a date night and go to dinner we like reset and we just feel like we're back because we have in the moment conversation and and it's just that escape and that like intimacy of of the dinner absolutely there's a part there's a there's a um i think it's a i believe it's an um an old chinese proverb that said who i don't know if that's true but i don't want to claim but for the record i didn't

say this shit i'm just stealing it but it's the thing of like um who we are wet without stress is who we are and who we are with stress is who the world makes us into right and so in that moment with my partner able to be there in this joyful time and we can connect that's who you guys really are who you are when there is a billion loads of laundry and bills to pay and stress around that's what the world makes you into and i think that's why like vacations are really helpful too like it gives you this like elongated period to connect and separate yourselves from the stresses of life although do you know the most common time for couples to fight what no what would you think what day the week would you say is the most common day for couples to fight Monday okay that's what we thought

too it's in Friday really Friday coming off of that like the the week and the exhaustion from the week that you were like trying to connect but there was like a blockage and a barrier there and then also the most of the most common time for couples to fight is at the beginning of a vacation. The first few days of vacation, it takes you a few days to get in. I wouldn't think that because I feel like I get to vacation and I'm like, give me a margarita, let's go and have all the sex tonight. Well, also there's, you know, if you have been inundated with stress and you haven't had the time to connect, also there's times where couples, it feels very scary for couples to have that amount of time

to be vulnerable with one another. And so that's another reason that we kind of like push each other away a little bit before we can open up and be vulnerable, have that space to connect. And that's another reason. It takes us a little bit of time to be like, okay, I can do this. Like I feel like I can be vulnerable with my partner. That's so interesting that when you, I mean, I'm always mind blown by theories and people like how they, you know, obviously you probably have a lot of those being therapists.

But I'm like, wow, that is a really great point. I'll never forget, like, my one aha moment with the first time I went to therapy, but I feel like you guys probably do those a lot where I'm like, oh, you're so right. Wow. That's like, I feel like that happens probably all the time for you guys. Do you, do you have clients that sit there and have those aha moments all the time with you guys? Yes, yes, it's very exciting.

We forget that we know a lot of stuff. Like we often, because we talk about this all day long, so sometimes we like share information and someone's like, holy shit. It blew my mind. And I was like, oh, I guess we should talk more often. But our job is to listen. Yeah. And our conversations with each other are so boring because they're like so therapeutic.

Like there's no drama in our conversation. We're like, well, what's my part in this? You know, like we're just going back and more. Yeah. Like no real drama. So it's pretty lame. It's lame, but incredible work. Doing great work.

I think that's so cool. You guys were talking. earlier about how to bring some joy into Christmas and the holidays. And I was trying to think that because a lot of times with families and the holidays, there's always pros and cons. There's always the triggers and emotions and things that come up and people feeling overwhelmed because of the family dynamic or arguments or different beliefs and people trying to understand their boundaries with their family. But now I don't know how many people will even see their family for Christmas. But first two questions we'll start with this one and then we'll end with the joy well you

wanted something interesting about the family dynamics and the fact that the holidays for a lot of people are very different this year so for some of us the holidays might have more grief than we're used to yeah right so maybe it's because we can't see our family out of safety maybe it's because we're not seeing our family due to borders being closed maybe we're not seeing our family um because it's just the right thing for us at this time And also, maybe we've lost a loved one. For a lot of people, there has been so much grief and a lot of actual loss of life this year.

And a lot of times, the holidays are a big reminder for that, right? So there's that part. And then there's some of us that feel the joy that we don't have to do a bunch of shit that we don't want to. For some of us, it's like a relief. Like, thank God, I get a year off. Like, I have an excuse. Yes, you're right.

And it's okay to feel both. Yeah. It is okay to feel grief and feel joy because this year is, I can hate this term, but it's so unprecedented. It's so unprecedented this year. It's the only word to describe it. I know. Because it is to have all of these different feelings around, in a complex way, it's okay to feel

all of it right now. And I think just in general, there's a lot of pressure around the holidays for it to be this like very joyful experience, right? And I think that separate from everything that has happened this year, I think that it is a very stressful time for a lot of people because of the pressure of like, well, I'm not supposed to be sad. I'm not supposed to be feeling this way. Like this is supposed to be like such a happy time. Everyone around me is happy when like, no, actually like there's a lot of people who feel a ton of stress during this time. Yeah. And so I think that, you know, there's a piece of this that also validates our emotional experience of like,

okay, I don't feel that that great this year and there's a reason for it. But I think just in general, just allowing us ourselves to feel negative emotions around this time too, whether it's this year or any other years, is important because I think it can be a really stressful time for people. Right. I actually have a question, too. I was thinking about this, like a healthy way to deal with different opinions or on restrictions around COVID with family and friends. Like, for example, I have a friend that still wants to go spend

Christmas with her huge family outside of the country. And I'm like, okay, what do I do around the emotions around not agreeing with all of that? This is one of the number one questions we're getting right now. Really? What do I do if people in my life are, do I feel like they're not being safe? And I love, there's like so many hilarious memes about this where it's like, I was safe. I was only with 50 of my best friends that are bubbling together. Right. You're like, what the hell are you talking about? It doesn't work anymore.

So that is really true. So what's going to happen? And we saw it. I mean, we really saw his first hit of what happened with Thanksgiving that there was a massive spike. Yeah. Right? So a lot of us right now are like, man, like, look what just happened.

How could you not take that of how higher rates are, especially in huge metropolitan areas? And still people are going to do what they decide to do. And this is the worst part that we cannot continue. control other people. And we're still then going to have reactions to the decision that they make. And I think it's especially hard for people pleasers who are so used to like wanting other people to be happy. Right. So we have these different opinions about, okay, well, I'm being really safe, but this person, you know, has different opinions about who they want around

them. That if we're so used to taking their feelings into consideration over ours and we're so just taking everyone else's feelings and into consideration over our own. But it makes it that much harder and you can almost feel in yourself, like you feel that anxiety that comes up of like, okay, no, I'm not listening to myself. I'm listening more to how other people feel and trying to make them happy over what feels right for me. So I think that that's another suggestion is like really digging into what feels right for you and how can you listen to yourself through this process and be able to communicate that.

because people who are people-pleasers have a really, really hard time with that, that they put so much pressure on themselves to make other people happy before themselves. So really listening to you. And I think that's an important thing to bring up, right? Because right now we might be having huge reactions to friends that are making decisions that we wouldn't make. But maybe those friends are also so insanely influenced by their family or trying to people or parent-please their own families, right?

So one of the things we keep hearing that keeps happening is people, are saying to their parents, I really don't think we should see each other this year. And then sometimes overbearing a critical mother's or guilt-tripping fathers will come in and say something along lines of, but what if, how could you miss the holidays with me? It's Christmas, it's Hanukkah, it's how could you do this? And so then there's the guilt. And guilt can make us do a lot of shits, even if we don't align with that value. So we have to also then have empathy for people around us that maybe they are consumed with guilt and they're putting in a lose-lose situation as well. That's so true. You just never know what's going on on the other side. Like for example,

I obviously have the internet watching me and that can be a scary thing sometimes because I got some people were really upset about me about this dinner I went to the other night where I, the measures I took to go to do this dinner with these friends, two of them had already had COVID. like three weeks ago. We all got tested. We made sure they had the antibodies that they were still negative. We paid actually like an embarrassing amount of money to get these tests done. Like the other couple had been quarantining for two weeks just to put on this dinner. We had been tested. Like we went to extreme measures and we still were following the guidelines for our area and what we were doing. And we were all masked up except for when we sat down for dinner, like everything we went to extreme

measures and of course people were just so disappointed in me and it broke my heart because you just never know what the other person i'm like that dinner like literally saved my mental health and everything that we did to to be able to do that was so worth it to me so it's hard because i do feel that i'm i sometimes i wonder if i am a people pleaser because i never thought i was and i you can shift i guess i feel like i'm turning into a people pleaser and that's not good well i also think when you're on the internet and people attack you it makes you want to not get in trouble by people right like that's human nature that's human nature to not want to get punished and shamed by others and we also have a incredibly shaming culture yeah and actually one of the interesting things that

we know and there is research on this of um from a lot of sex educators that really try to get people to wear condoms yeah and they're using a lot of the same research to get people to wear masks And that shaming doesn't work. Yeah, yeah. I think we do that to ourselves a lot of the time, too, to get ourselves to do things, right? We're like, oh, you know, if you don't wake up early enough, you're like, oh, my God, I'm so lazy. Like, why wouldn't I wake up earlier or that we try, we think that shaming is going to help motivate us in some way, but usually it just makes us feel like shit and motivates us. Yeah.

And so, you know, I think that another way to talk to yourself or talk to your friends or talk to people in order to motivate them, to almost find the compassion underneath that. To find compassion for yourself, well, okay, like, the reason why I couldn't wake up at this time, like, I'm really tired. I've been doing a lot. And, like, the reason why I need to go to this dinner, I've taken all of these measures, I've, but I really need to do this to take care of my mental health. And so I think that just in general, to be able to find the compassion. underneath and to be able to connect. And, you know, being a people, being a people pleaser can come to from, like, how empathetic you are, like how you can understand and feel other people's emotions. So it's not necessarily a bad thing. It's just a matter of how much you allow that to

control your actions. I think that that probably matters. That's a good point. I am a very empathetic person and I definitely take on other people's emotions. That's probably what that is. There's this other part where, like, it's actually easier to get mad at a stranger on the internet than, like, our best friend who isn't taking precautions. So a lot of people that are getting really mad actually have family members and friends that aren't taking precautions. You're the scapegoat. So you're out.

You're a scapegoat. I'll take it. I mean, I'll take one of the team there, I guess. And I understand because a lot of people have to realize that, I mean, maybe not so much from, like, mean people on the internet. there are some people that actually really care and want to make sure that you're doing it just because they don't want to see you get sick or like it comes from their intentions are in the right place and that comes from a place of love like that I understand yeah yeah it's hard

you can tell the difference we know when we get messages we know if it's coming from love or hate you're right like that person who called us like a cocky but they know ass we got to this week somebody said oh my gosh You're putting up cockamamie ho-ass memes. And I just responded. It was like, I can't even process the rest of your comment just due to this one sentence you said person, sir. So like, you lost me.

So, like, some people just want to say shit on the internet. That's fine. I mean, I might recycle that term. What was it again? I couldn't even remember it. We have to look at it. It was cockamani ho-ass meme. Yeah.

I don't know what it meant, but I think I loved it. And then I just sent him back a bunch of emojis, and he sent me emojis back. And I feel like we really, I feel like we had worked through it together in the comments. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's one unprecedented time. So I'm pretty much. That's hilarious.

Do you feel like, going back to Christmas, because I was just thinking about this, do you feel like there's anything positive we can take away from not being able to do Christmas and holidays the same this year? Like, what are the positives we can take away from it? Okay. There's a few. There is a few. Which when we talk about positives, we also want to talk about that, like, you don't need to be,

like, we don't have to have toxic positivity, right? So if you feel like shit, you go on and feel like shit. But if you want to feel kind of positive, a great thing to do is, is this is a year that maybe there's been years in the past, you're like, man, I don't want to do this. I'm tired. I'm exhausted. I don't want to do this obligation. I'm worried that my aunt Susie is going to make comments about how much I'm eating.

This year, if you're making the decision to do solo holidays, you can, you can, get to do whatever the fuck you want. And here's the exciting part about that is you can eat without being worried about someone making a comment. You can show up wearing flip flops and dinner and maybe that's not allowed in your house typically. I would encourage you to say, you want to know what? This is a one year, but one, it's, especially if you celebrate Christmas, it's 24 hours.

24 hours, that's it. So even if it feels horrible, you can handle 24 hours. Any person that's listening, I promise you, your feelings will pass and you can through anything for 24 hours. And so to give yourself permission to do all the things you would never be able to do before. I think it also, and it also gives you and your family an opportunity to start new traditions. You know, I think we get so set in like very specific ways of doing things. And we're just like, well, we're just going to keep doing this because this is how we've

always done it. And, you know, it like almost gives you the opportunity to start new traditions with your family. Yeah. So you can get real creative with it and be like, okay. like what can I throw in here this year that like I would really enjoy like I'm going to cook a bun cake I don't know I'm nearly Jewish so I don't know I don't know what we feel like that's so cute I'm never cooking a bun cake I don't know what's going on but I feel like is that that something that's what it's your 24 hours you could do whatever there you go I'm going to cook a bun cake this year

But that's the thing is that, like, you can choose to do different things, right? And it doesn't just, you know, if you went to someone's house every single year, that, like, you can make that change. And or maybe you're not doing it on Christmas. Maybe you're doing it at a different time. And so if you're doing Christmas Day instead of Chris, I don't, once again, I don't know how these things are. You're trying to be creative.

You're trying to be creative. I like it. Thank you. Thank you. But for you, right? So, Jen, so you did not celebrate. Hanukkah this year. Right. And I usually don't celebrate Hanukkah, so I don't know if we can use this as an example. It's a very bad joke. But not the best. Yeah. However, I, I, maybe I would have cooked Lakas in the past. And this year, not so much.

You are very good to make a lockas. Thank you so much. So, sure. So, but for a lot of us, it's this idea of saying, like, what do, this is 24 hours. So whether I want to say that it's a holiday or not, I think there's another part we'll hear people to say, like, if I can't, If it can't be the way I want it to be, I'm not doing anything. So I'm not doing, I'm not putting up my decorations or I'm not doing anything. I would encourage you to, instead, look inside yourself and say, what do I actually want? Right? This idea of if I was to align with myself of what I want this year to look like. So maybe it isn't putting up decorations and that's totally fine. But maybe you actually really do like those decorations, but it just feels like it's going to hurt to see them, right?

Yeah. Like actually putting those things out makes me feel sad. And I would invite you to like take a look at that sadness and still say, but this is important to me, that we can have sadness and joy together for that 24 hours. That's true because you know for a fact you're not going through that alone. You know, a lot of times with feeling depressed or feeling down, people always seem to feel alone. But this is one thing where you know for a fact, you're not the only person going through that this year, that you can be sad that it's allowed and that there's a lot of other people going through that same thing with you. Absolutely. I think that's been a good thing for mental health in general is that a lot of people have felt more comfortable talking about their anxiety

and depression because they're like, oh, well, there's a pandemic happening. Like, I am allowed to have anxiety and depression now. Yeah. And so talk about the fact that I'm going to therapy because things are really hard. When fact of the matter is, everyone had anxiety and not everyone, but in depression before this, but people weren't talking about it as much. So to, for it to really open the door for people to have this conversation about mental health, because it feels more normalized now. I think it's really important, whether it's just in general or during the holidays. Yeah, I think I think that's right. Everything you said, and I think it is about getting creative and thinking what can you do instead of what can't you do. And I'm trying to do the same thing. I was going to ask you guys for advice because this is the longest I've ever gone without seeing my family and I'm so close to them and it's been really hard and that's something about coming home from doing dancing is just realizing that those are the people I want to see right now you know like celebrate your wins go through hard times with all of those things and that's two things I'm dealing with I want to celebrate my win and I'm also going through

the understanding that no I'm back home in this pandemic and I was trying to think of ways to get creative over the holidays and I'm obviously not the only one in this boat but but what do you guys think like what are ways we can get creative with family if we can't be with them this year so i love the idea of well so you're a situation now can you can you can you go back to canada but jason can i can go i can cross the border i'd have to quarantine for two weeks and the cops actually like watch you like they come check on you at your home um so you have to quarantine for two weeks and then you can see people but where i'm from is like the worst place to be in canada right now for COVID, and so it's not even worth it. And Jason can't come. Yeah, I figured he

couldn't. So this is a really great time to you. You know, it's, we've all gotten so much more comfortable technology this year, right? So whether you're using Zoom to do events, I would also say, okay, what do we want to do that day, right? Maybe we're going to do like a Zoom game of Carolyn. Maybe we're going to do a watch party on Disney Plus or on Netflix, right, of watching a holiday movie. You know, maybe we are actually going to make some snowmen and send it back and forth or write a, like, write a Christmas story together. There's so many different things we can do, but actually what we're talking about here is carving out intentional time of joy and creativity. That is very, very different than sort of letting a bypass and being passive, right?

So passive would be like, I guess I'll just call my parents. that day. No, let's not do that. This year, let's say you want to know what. It's really important that you and I get on this time together, not like let's just let it happen. I think that this is really common. If we're in an avoidance phase, if we're feeling sad, especially, it's easy to avoid and just sort of let it become a passive thing of all just call them or whatever. I want to encourage people to not do that. I want to encourage you to look at yourself and to consciously create something different this year. I think also saying, like, how do you typically connect with your family?

Like, what is it about being with them that allows you to connect with them? Like, are you watching movies together? Are you, like, making jokes together? You know, like, and so to use the ways in which you feel connected to them, and if you could use technology in that, right, and to be able to mimic that in a way, and of course, it's not the same. It's not the same to not be able to hug them and spend that. quality time with them and then just to be in their presence it's that it's it's not

going to be the same but to really think about because every family connects differently in different ways right and we talk about love languages and like how we get those love languages right that like physical touch is going to be a tougher one that we're not going to be able to hug family members but you know if if you can if you usually spend that time you know having a conversation about certain things how can you recreate that through technology like thank God that there's so much technology these days. Oh, I think about that all the time. I think about that all the time because like even it's not even that long ago that we had those little flip Nokia phones like

and that was it. Like it really wasn't that long ago. And now we have like, for example, I threw a party for my due edit team for Christmas and we all did like a game night with drinks over Zoom and we like played what was it? Oh, name that Christmas tune. And you had to hit you know the reactions button at the bottom of the Zoom where it was whoever could like ring in first got to like answer and it was so fun and I because my family's all about the games and so I'm like that's that's pretty easy to do over Zoom we can make make that work and you know what you can probably find so many things like things online that people have created um to use over Zoom because you are not the like there are so many people are finding ways because playing a game over Zoom is actually a great idea

And also, like, you know, for you to even say, like, okay, like, I'm actually, one of the other things that somebody once had taught me about, one of the best ways to have joy is to do a secret present for someone else, right? So one of the ways we can sometimes cultivate joy is if I'm working on a secret, something secret, right? So if I, and that's why we like giving presents, right? It's like that prep time. So to sit here and say, you want to know what? I'm going to tell my family that we're going to Zoom at 12 o'clock on Christmas. but actually I have come up with a full PowerPoint game to surprise them with. That's a great idea. Yes, because the joy you feel putting into that and then they're going

to get on and be like, what? What are we doing? And then it's just going to ease, right? So you get to have that excitement beforehand and during and you did this beautiful thing for someone else. And a lot of times it's something as simple as that of a surprise that can bring gratitude. That's so true. I like that. That just gave me the warm and fuzzies. It's really nice. And it's helpful in those families where, like, you end up having difficult conversations with people. If you're just playing games and then you can be like, okay, game over, bye, you know?

Like, it's really helpful in those families, too. You want to talk about politics now? Oh, my computer is lying weird. But also, I have to say, I have to say, teachers have gotten so, I mean, teachers the most incredible teachers and nurses, the real stars of this year, right? Like, and so teachers have gotten so creative this year. If you actually go on to teachers pay teachers or like Pinterest or something, so many teachers have put out these amazing information about different ways to celebrate the holidays that

you could 100% use within your family. That's okay. Wait, I'm actually going to look at my email for one second because I had a guy reached out to me. I forget his name. Let me, I remember, okay, it said, please help write my wife. wife's day. This was the nicest email. I have, like, gotten from a husband. And, okay, his name is Joseph Gross. And he wrote this whole email about like, and he was funny about it. And he said that you've

really helped my wife during the crazy times with your podcast. First of all, that alone just maybe be like, oh, God, I'm going to cry. It's so nice to know that like I could help in any way. And I don't really sometimes realize that there could be somebody out there that's listening to the podcast that like, I help them get through an hour. Like, that's what I always. want from my podcast, but to hear someone tell me that's what I did or to help someone through a hard time. Okay, so that was really nice. But I think she is, okay, she's a mom.

She, she's, he's saying that she does everything for the family. Like, she's incredible. Her name's Amy. He said she's everything to me and my children, that she's been just selfless through the whole pandemic. She's been learning remote with the kids while continuing to manage a clinical research lab in pediatric oncology department um and he was just going off this woman just sounds incredible and so i was like i am going to just talk about her for a hot minute in this podcast because

oh my god amy a huge shout out i just love that first of all that he wrote this email and he's like and don't get me wrong i'm not like sitting back on the couch drinking beers and like she's just everything like they both work really hard but she's she's just like sounds like she's being an incredible mom while still doing this, like to go do what she does for work and then to be such a hands-on mom. And to know that this podcast helped her, I was like, Amy, gross, if you're listening, you're probably in the middle of laundry right now or doing some or saving lives. Like, it's either one of the two. And we just want to say thank you for everything that you do. Oh my God. Amy. You're amazing. Yeah. And like how incredible, right? So the joy. So what happened?

Let's like break down that interaction. Yeah. So this man felt. so much gratitude and love towards his wife. He was like, what is a little, little something that is probably a reach? Right. I'll email this person. Who even knows if she'll be able to get it, like come across her page. And the fact that he got to sit there and that is cultivating joy. Right there. That's the preeming example. And that's, that's like the surprise. Like that's it created a surprise for her. Yeah. By emailing you. And it's so important for people to know, like we do you read these emails and like they touch you they really do and there's so many like i've i've actually made some incredible friendships over a random email that they say i don't know if

you're ever going to see this and don't don't hate me if i don't respond to some because i'm sure there are ones i've missed and things that happen but i really do try to get back to as many people as i can because i mean they're the people that are listening to this podcast that like they're they're muff people and you know what i love that he did right he like she didn't even know he said that. No. So he gave me this other really good idea that I feel like it's a great thing to do with your families. If you cannot be with your family this year and you are loving and missing them, it would not hurt to write them a lovely note about what they mean to you. We do not express love enough, right? To sit there, Caitlin, even for you to say, like, I wish I was with my family and mom,

here are my three favorite things about you. Dad, here are my favorite things about you, right? like because it takes actually like no effort from us to bring joy and then also you get to express this and that cultivates more joy in love that's that's really you it really hit me in the fields today yeah yeah to be able to write that too i think people have a hard time being that vulnerable in person yeah you can look at it as it gives you the opportunity to like write you would never like write a letter and just like leave i mean i guess you could like leave like leave it on their desk, but if you're sending them a letter in the mail, like, how exciting is it to get a letter in the mail these days that isn't a bill? You're so right. Like you, even the cards,

when I get Christmas cards from my friends who have families, I, it makes my day. It makes my day to see the picture of them with a little handwritten note on the back. There's just something about handwriting that goes along with me. It's a lost art. It really is. It's like it's not a text message. It's not like typed. It's literally like a handwritten like, we love you and miss you. I'm like, oh my God. It really means so much. Because you really, you took the time to write that out, to think about what you were going to write. And I think that being able to send that in a letter, it's another way to tell people how much you appreciate them. Every postal worker that's listening who is so backed up right now,

the United States Postal Service are another hero of this year and they're like, please don't send any more like Yeah, they're in a podcast like no more It's a busy time Everything's late, good luck So you're right, but like they had a handwritten thing Or even, you know, like in your iPhone

You could go into the albums and it says like people And you can make it into a slideshow Yeah, I love that. Yeah, I said that to my mom But she thought that I spent hours doing it. I was like, girlfriend. When you send it to someone technology, too, they think you spent a really long time. That's another music behind it.

The whole slide show, I've done that too. My mom, I've done it for my mom, my dad, and my sister. You just got to make sure you don't have any, like, racy pictures, like, in your and, like, it comes up, like, and it's like, oh, it's her family. And then, like, there's a naked picture. That would be. Check it first, right? Check it first.

Actually, we should go into. confessions because that that just makes me think about what I did the other day. And how we have to be so ready. Like when something triggers your memory of like you were saying, oh, you don't want like a naked picture to slide in there. I didn't have a naked picture. But I did accidentally pull up my, the last thing I Googled because I was trying to show Jason something else.

Like we were going to Google something and I pulled up what I had last Googled, which I don't even know how to explain how I got here and I'll try but it said do dicks get boners and he was like the kids get boners what the hell and I was like oh my god but it was because my girlfriend said something like are you going to have some wine tonight and I said uh does a ducks boner drag in the weeds like do ducks get boners and I was like I don't know we always said that in Canada. And so I meant to Google, do ducks get boners? But I accidentally, like, typed in dicks. And then I must have, like, forgotten the conversation and, like, closed it out. So when Jason was like, oh, let's use your phone and Google that, I pull it up and it just said,

do dicks get boners? But wait, did we ever think out if ducks get boners? Yeah, apparently raging ones. Wait, I have never heard that saying before, but I think we should start saying it. Wait, can you say that again, the saying? Yeah. Does it? Like, you know does a bear shit in the woods does a duck's boner drag in the weeds i mean it makes sense because like if a duck has a huge boner it's going to drag in the weeds yeah yeah i've said that a million times i think i've actually said it on the podcast before i actually did google about duck boners but we actually got somewhere where this i was like oh how do i explain it to her and i google that and then i accidentally put dicks instead of ducks

it was a whole thing. That could have taken you down a deep, dark hole of Google if you like it. And then it turned into what, it had like below five facts about penises. And then I'm like, well, now I'm curious. And like, one was like small penises create large erections. And I was like, that's true. But okay. No, no.

We're a show or not a shower. I guess so. Well, we're not a shower. That makes sense to me. Well, now. Everyone is going to... Now everyone else is going through a deep dark Google hole. Yes.

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offered right now. Head to Headspace.com slash vine today. Now back to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Okay, do you guys have a confession for me? Okay, you can mind that. You want to go first. I'll sit my wine for this one. Okay, I have a couple. And they're, I mean, the ducks with the boners, I think that's going to beat out any of ours.

So, like, I don't know how to follow that. We should have just had you go first. We should have you go last. Yeah. Okay, so one of them is that, like, I often fall asleep while I'm watching movies with my husband. And he's always like, oh, like, we never spend time together. Like, let's watch this movie. And I'm like, okay, okay, he's like, but you can't fall asleep.

Like, we need to watch the whole movie out. And, like, totally totally. So, like, obviously, I fall asleep, like, five minutes into the movie. But I've really gotten this, like, amazing ability to pretend like I've watched the whole movie. So he'll, like, turn around, like, ask me questions and, like, try to get me to engage. And somehow I'm just, like, spewing out information about the movie in my sleep. You're, like, individual it before? it's really incredible like i think that i just have have something's happening in my sleep where i'm

able to pretend like i bought this whole movie with him so that was one of my confessions that that's that's actually really funny um i had the same thing happened to me this was like i don't know like seven years ago with with this guy i was dating and we're he he said the same thing i always fell asleep during movies and one time we were watching a 3d movie so i got to have the glasses on and I was like perfect it was like 30 seconds and I'm out and you have the glasses on and you're sleeping like it is so funny yeah hilarious you're passed out with your mouth open yeah but the glasses are on so like looks like you're just watching the 3d it looks like you're amazed by the movie yeah yeah exactly okay so mine is bad okay so eventually I have a lot of

shart stories I'm I know sharding is a common part of my life I've talked about it on our show before I wish that was a lie, but it's not. So who actually is not weird to me, but I have actually a really bad one. And my concern is that the person who this affects, for sure, listens to this show. So my greatest apology. So I had actually never seen an episode of The Bachelor or The Bachelor until last week. And I'm going to tell you the story that goes along with this, which is Jen, who is my business partner and my co-hosts. And then Nikki, who is the manager of the string to six podcast, are massive Bachelor and Bachelor

at fans. Love it. Watch every episode. I have never seen it. I just, I don't know. I'm just not fair. Okay. But they love it.

And they always are talking. They're always like going in with like a, you know, the therapeutic mindset, talk about everything. And so Nikki, our manager had reached at, had, was connecting with Rochelle, who does the walk you out podcast, which is a Bachelor Recap podcast, and she asked us to come on the show. I have never seen an episode of The Bachelor, so I watched the entire season in 72 hours this week to go on the show. It's fun. Which season?

This one, Cachas. I know. So I could go on the show after. She was, okay, let me just say, she has a daughter, her husband was away, and so she was watching it until, like, June in the morning. So I stayed up and watched this and went on this show and acted like I'm a huge bachelor fan, but I did it in 72 hours, and now I'm very embarrassed to be admitting this home. That's actually really sweet of you to commit your time like that to go on this podcast,

like that I would be very flattered if someone did that kind of research to... It was research. You wouldn't think that that was sort of a con artist move? I don't know. I wouldn't respect the hustle. before we go into the new year i have some questions from listeners but my last thing is before we go into the new year i think i'm feeling guilty about this even myself like i'm starting to you know eat all the holiday treats and think about what i'm you know putting in my body i'm used to

exercising every day now i'm starting to feel guilty when i know i shouldn't um and i think it's how to i guess ways that we can keep ourselves accountable for not feeling guilt um and for being able to enjoy the holidays around some things that might be triggering food-wise for people. This was a question that actually came up a lot when I asked people to ask you questions, but I had it written down anyways, just ways to cope around food and triggering things like that over the holidays and going into a new year feeling like your best self. Absolutely. So I would say to begin with, like one of the things to keep in mind is that we're inundated

with this diet culture. It is everywhere. And you were to start to see it. It's so toxic, right? And, like, and I think that this year's been a little different. Like, even I know, like, Peloton Instructure has made a decision to not say, like, you're working off the turkey around Thanksgiving, right? Like, I really appreciate there's been a massive shift in the fitness industry,

which I'm incredibly grateful and thankful to. Yeah. So, but to keep in mind, it's everywhere. So you're not bad for having those thoughts. You're a product of the diet culture that we've all grown up around. Now, I want you to also keep in mind is that your body has gotten through a global pandemic. this year. Your body is awesome. We should be so grateful. Whether you are on the other side of this of weighing less or weighing more, your body has taken you and protected you on this

incredible ride. And I think so for that to say to yourself, you want to know what, food is not just about fuel. Food's about memories. Food's about pleasure. Food is about connection. It can be, food can be about culture. Who can be about so many different things? And there's an incredible part to say to yourself that's what the holidays are about too right the holidays are about pleasure the holidays are about connection the holidays are about culture and food happens to just be a part of that and so when you go into that place of the negative thoughts around food the diet culture thoughts the you know any of that body shaming to try to flip it and say what did my body do for me this year and food is not just about fuel so

I can have something simply because I like having it and also we need to eat right so on the days it's really common I hear people talk all the time like I'm not going to eat all day Christmas until Christmas dinner don't do that yeah don't do that yeah don't do that because then guess what happens you're going to have quote unquote a binge and then you're going to feel really bad about yourself you actually have to still eat every four to five hours for that blood sugar throughout that whole day and then still enjoy whatever feels right for your body during that meal And so I would really say the best thing you can do is to not type to do any type of crash diet that's going to make you feel worse and just listening to your body and eating throughout the day, eating throughout the week and keeping it moving. Because what we're talking about once again is 24 hours.

The holidays then end and we don't need to be war in our body in January. Right. That's so true. I've, I mean, I've come a long way with so many things that mental health and body image and everything. and I'm now able to like stop myself in those thoughts and and realize that that's not a healthy way of thinking that that that's not that because I enjoy eating so much and I'm never I'm never that person that's like I would never say I'm not going to eat today because I ate so much yesterday. I'm just not like that because I love food so much and I just have I have a

healthy relationship with food but I know so many people that don't and so many like even young kids will actually a mom in the in the question said that her 13 year old for the first time came to her and said I feel like everyone um is perfect around me I'm in on TikTok and all these girls are perfect and I shouldn't eat um I shouldn't eat because I'm scared to put on pounds and that was a 13 year old and saying and she was aware that it was like um like she was like we need to talk about body positivity the 13 year old said and was aware that she had these thoughts that weren't right. And one of the moms actually wanted to ask you guys how you would deal with that. I also think that as you're speaking to that there's so many

messages around diet culture that we get from the media, that we get from social media. And to be able to really filter that out for yourself to be able to say, okay, this is something that's triggering me. And so how can I, you know, delete these accounts or how can I block these accounts because I recognize that the more I consume this, you know, mentally, the more it's affecting how I see myself. Because I think that we very often, and it's easy to compare ourselves to other people, right? And, you know, people are using filters. They're using some of those apps and edit. Like, yeah, like face tune and stuff. Right, right. And so I think that it's so easy to compare ourselves to people on social media and say, okay, well, I need to look like this.

And what we don't realize is that everyone is different. And to be able to really be conscious of the messages that you are taking in, I think is really important. I think, you know, this one it's hard. I have a daughter. She'll be two in February. And I know. And research tells us that girls typically start thinking about their first diet at age seven. So I look at my two-year-old and think, in five years, this kid is going to be, I'm very sorry, I keep saying the F word, it really rips me up. I start thinking myself that in five years my daughter is going to want to lose weight, right? And so the number one thing I know is that it's really easy in that moment to want to say

to our child, what are you talking about? You're beautiful. Don't think that. Don't worry about that. Instead, I would invite you to then have a deeper conversation. Well, what's that like when you see their body that looks different than yours? And what's it like when you see a body that's bigger than yours? And to start having really uncomfortable conversations with our children about what it's like on our weight, what it's like to see bodies that are different than ours and what it's like to think like, yeah, that girl has a different body.

And she might have a genetic predisposition to just be thinner. Like that's it. Like part of this is just how it's going to be. Right. And so it's really easy for us as moms to be so uncomfortable with our child saying that. We just say, babe, don't think that at all. Don't worry. Instead, say, well, what's it like when you see that?

Right, right. And I think being conscious, too, of the ways in which you talk about yourself and your own body in front of your kids. Yeah. Because they are sponges. Like, they will suck that up and emulate that, right? And so to be very, even if you. you're, you know, speaking very consciously to your kids about their own bodies or talking to also be conscious about the way in which you're talking about your own body and the way in which

you're talking about food and dieting around your kids too. Yeah, I agree. I think I've talked about this. It might have even been with you guys. I can't remember who, but I heard Jason say a long time ago, and I had to remind him again today because he did it again. But it's been a very long period of time between when he did it. But he said today, I'm, I'm going to go for a run so that I can earn my chicken wings later. And I went, ah, I was like, don't say that. And he was like, why? And I was like, I feel like I've had this conversation with him before. And I feel like I've said it on the podcast that we've had that conversation before. But again, it was a long time ago, so I can't remember. But I was like, you've got to think about if a kid is listening to that and the

message around you can't enjoy food unless you do this and like okay that's fair like it's just even little small messages like that to be aware of of how to take in front of kids absolutely and stuff that you don't think is a big deal right and you don't realize you know and you just remember kids are just hearing it everywhere with TikTok with we want home to be safe yeah right home should be about safety home should be about stability so like that might have been important for kids to be able to come home and have those conversations about their bodies. Everyone looks perfect. I don't look like this because if there's one place we want to not be, it should be at home. They already get it everywhere else. We can't pretend like it's not going to be there. So let's just make

home as safe as possible. Yeah. I like that. And Taylor, I actually relate to this question so hard, but Taylor said, anxiety often causes me to respond with harsh emotion. How do I deal with that or is it better to just not respond? You know, so it sounds like she is someone who deals with her anxiety by reacting to it, that like it feels, because like when anxiety builds up in us, there's such energy behind it. We all deal with that anxiety in different ways. And it sounds like the way in which she deals with hers. And I think we did talk about this on the original podcast and having like a flashback

on the first podcast, is that she reacts to it. And so I think that's becoming very, um, a way. aware of when that anxiety is coming up because it's so easy to just feel it and react. It becomes so natural for the two to be coupled with each other. And so the more aware and you get with the anxiety within your body, the more you recognize like where you're feeling it. Like typically, I'll feel it in my chest or I'll feel it in my stomach. And the more you can get quiet with yourself to say, okay, feel like this is coming up.

Now, how can I choose what I want to do with this, right? So you're making more of a conscious decision to say, I want to do something with this. And if that means you have to get the energy out of your body, maybe instead of yelling at someone, you're going for a walk, right? Or you're just saying, listen, I need to like take a minute in the other room. You need to scream into a pillow, whatever you need to do to get that energy out in a way that's going to be constructive for you as opposed to. Because sometimes when it comes out in your communication with other people, then they might

have a reaction back and it will increase your anxiety because of the way in which it's coming out in your communication. And so to almost develop coping mechanisms around how do you get that energy out in the moment in a way that's going to be the most helpful for you. Yeah. And you know, Kaylee started to say like this is something you deal with, right? For a lot of us that our anxiety comes out as anger or passive aggressive, there's a lot of shame around it because we feel really bad. There's a lot of guilt after we have that reaction when really it's like an actual cycle of anxiety of anger of guilt that puts it into the circular motion and so one of these things to be able to say to yourself I feel that I'm going to say something I'm not going to like right like to start building that

into your language like I can feel that I'm not going to like what I do next right like and I have to walk away now like it is okay to say to people like I have to take a break from this conversation gym, because I just think when your anxiety looks like typical anxiety, right, where you shut down or your body shaking, right, like, where you go internal, that is really different than anxiety that looks like rage. When a lot of women have anxiety that looks like rage, I have anxiety that looks like rage. This is one of the things I learned about myself, and there's shame associated with it, of how you've come out at different times of your life, how you've been to other people, and so much of that is an internal process of shame and anxiety.

And so I think, one, you have to give yourself more compassion that the world's given to you by saying to yourself, I have to walk away because I really want to work on aligning my identity and my core values and who I am. Yeah. You go. No, you know. I was just going to say, I think sometimes, too, there's more vulnerable emotions underneath the anxiety.

that's similar to like anger men are typically taught that like anger is an easy anger is the emotion that they should express that that it's you know not manly in some way for them to express any sort of vulnerable emotion underneath that I think that a lot of times for women that it comes out as anxiety for us and that there's usually there can be more vulnerable emotions underneath it so sometimes as you get quiet with yourself to say okay well what's underneath this anxiety Like, what am I feeling? The more that you can get to that more vulnerable emotion, it might allow you to express it in a different way if you feel like you need to have a conversation with someone about it. So that was my only thing.

Now you can. No, those are all such good points. And I mean, again, that's such a hard practice because to be in that moment and be able to go from being so heated and almost like you can't control the emotions to be able to say, I have to take a step back. That's something that I have definitely worked on. I have like so many things now and tools that I use to like, for example, obviously one, I've been very open about that. I take anti-anxiety and depressants. I, it has changed my life.

Two, I have been able to not let myself get into that moment of being so heated that I can't take back what I say. Like I've been able to stop it before I even get in that moment. and three i never used to really um i guess i'd never really found something that worked for me but CBD i i had never do you guys use it ever because i had never found a brand that i was like i was like it's a placebo i didn't know and i found this one brand called new vita i actually like keep it in my in my podcast room it's a pretty bottle but it's just help me with sleeping and just getting a better night's sleep and relaxing has changed my mood in

the next day. Do you guys use CBD? Yes. We've said that's a lot, like especially when it comes to women and anger. And this is something, especially for a lot of women, the first time in motherhood, that postpartum rage becomes larger, that I actually talk a lot about CBD or conscious cannabis consumption. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, that's illegal here in Nashville, which sucks. Well, so in Pennsylvania, you can. So it's not. For medical, yeah. So, yeah, so for medical marijuana in Pennsylvania. but I think but it also you make a good point in that like the more sleep that you get the more you're hydrated the more you're nurturing yourself in different ways the easier it's going to be to

regulate your emotions and we always say this that you know the you know the advice where people say like oh don't go to bed angry like make sure you talk about we actually do not agree with that go to sleep like make sure you get some rest I think the goal is that you don't sweep it under the rug yeah at the end of the day right and so like go to sleep and you know Somehow when you wake up in the morning, you're like, oh, I actually feel so much better. Like, I don't even remember why I was upset the night before. Is that the more sleep you get, the more you're nurturing yourself, the easier it's going to be to regulate your emotions. Yeah.

Yeah, I agree. And then the last question I would give you guys is, this is a hard one, but she wants to know how to deal with her husband who's a narcissist. Oh, that's it. So there's a difference between narcissistic personality disorder and narcissistic traits, and there's two different ways to deal with this. So someone who has narcissistic traits is someone that we can go to couples therapy with, that we can do work. You can do work.

If you have someone who is narcissistic personality disorder, they can't do work. And so that is a really hard one that we also, just don't believe, we don't believe in telling women to be therapy. We don't believe that it's our job as a romantic partner to be fixing someone, to be saving someone, to be staying in and putting ourselves and our entire life at risk. So often women ask us this question of how long do I stay or how much do I do this? And we don't believe it's women's job to fix men. And I think the really, really tough thing here is that if they do have a personality,

disorder, there is no fixing it. Like, there will be no, there will be no balance in the relationship. I think that's a good way to put it. And it will always be you sacrificing parts of yourself for that person, which some people make the decision to do. It's not our job to say whether you should stay or go in a relationship. But the best thing you could do with a partner like that is making sure you're doing a ton of self-care yourself and that you're getting support because they're not going to be able to give it to you. And so it's less about changing them and more about changing your habits to better take care of yourself. Yeah. And deciphering between whether they really have a personality disorder or it's just narcissistic traits. Because I think

that that's a huge distinction to make. Right. Oh, yeah. It's so hard because, I mean, I've heard over and over how they can't change. Yeah. That's the type of hard. The narcissistic traits can. I mean, adult ADHD can look like narcissistic traits, right? A bunch of things. Yeah. So that's what's important to say, like, to sit here and say myself, okay, does my partner actually have narcissistic personality disorder or do they have narcissistic traits? These are two different things and that they're going to make a huge difference in what happens next.

But always get a therapist. Oh, yeah. You do not have one. And there's therapists who specialize and a couple therapists that specialize in narcissists. that's amazing okay well thank you guys so much and where can everybody find you um on social media because you two are so great and always so fun to talk to you i love how just like i love that you drop drop f bombs and i love that you're just so real and honest and open and i really appreciate you guys being on the podcast and i want other people to be able to find you well thank you for having us on

you can find us um at shrink chicks on instagram um on spotify iTunes any place you hear your podcast. Or we're also the owners of the therapy group. You can check us at at WC Therapy Group. And we're hiring, if any, therapists are listening for all over, all states. People are really in need of therapy. People are in need of therapy. So check us out on Shrchick's, but as always, thank you for having us. Thank you so much for honor. This is an amazing. Of course. Anytime I looked at the clock and I was like, oh my gosh, I kept them so much longer than I'm seen. And that's a good thing. So thank you for taking time. And hopefully we talked to you in another nine months.

differently. Awesome. Thank you guys so much. Thank you, Caitlin. Thank you so much. Thanks everybody for listening. I'm Caitlin Bristow. I'll see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening to Ospa Vine with Caitlin Briscoe. Get new episodes every Tuesday exclusively on podcast.1.com, the Podcast One app and subscribe on Apple Podcasts. Who's done with OTV? Hey guys. I'm Jordan Jones. And I have have a brand new podcast called What They Don't Tell You on Podcast One. I've been on TV and YouTube for almost 10 years as a dancer and a singer. So I'm here to share what they don't tell you about what it's like growing up in the public eye

and how to navigate the social media game. And I'll bring on my friends and share some stories and help you live your best Gen Z life. Get new episodes of What They Don't Tell You with me, Jordan Jones, every Thursday on podcast one, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you can get your podcasts.