Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Jenn Tran | After the Final Rose, Red Flags, and Life After the Show!

Episode Date: September 10, 2024

#770. Jenn Tran, this season’s Bachelorette, is answering all the burning questions! She opens up about the hardest part of After the Final Rose, what was really going through her mind when she had to watch the proposal, and how her engagement fell apart after the cameras stopped rolling. From missed red flags to revealing DM drama, Jenn gets real about her relationship with Devin and why she’s focusing on herself now. Plus, hear what life has been like since joining Dancing with the Stars—from rock bottom to sky-high in one wild night! If you’re LOVING this podcast, please follow and leave a rating and review below! PLUS, FOLLOW OUR PODCAST INSTAGRAM HERE! EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: (5:30) – Jenn reflects on the moment she realized her relationship with Devin had really ended. (7:31) – She shares the red flags she ignored during their long-distance relationship. (12:08) – Jenn addresses the rumors about Devin DMing other girls and what she saw. Thank you to our Sponsors! Check out these deals! The Defender: Learn more at LandRoverUSA.com/Defender.  LMNT: Get a free LMNT Sample Pack that includes 8 flavors with any purchase at DrinkLMNT.com/OFFTHEVINE Progressive: Quote...See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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So whether it's your first time experiencing Pride and Prejudice or you've read it a million times, you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again. So go listen to Pride and Prejudice now at audible.ca slash Jane Austen. Off the Vine. Hey, everybody. Welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow, a little under the weather. So I was supposed to be in L.A. to interview. interview Jen and go to a wedding. But thank God for the internet because I get to stay home and not spread my germs. And I still got all the answers that we are all looking for from Jen

this past season of The Bachelor with everything that happened, the timeline of the breakup. If she's talked to Maria, what the following of each other was like. There's just so many questions that I think you all had that I got to ask her. And so I don't think you'll be disappointed with this episode with Jen our last bachelorette and new dancing with the stars i was going to say champ i can't put that out there yet but we're rooting for jen first of all i wish i could jump through the screen and just give you a hug like i i hate that i'm not feeling great so i'm i had to cancel my flight to laa but i was literally lied a wedding but i was like i need to fly out there i need to hug her talk to her like i know there's so much going on and so much to talk about and

I know that it must be so hard because something happened a few months ago, then you're trying to relive it, then something more current happens, then you have to relive it with the rest of the world. But I have to say to see the internet show up and support you is something I never thought I'd see happen. And I just want to write off the bat check in and just know, how are you doing? It has been really hard. Just reliving the past couple of months, like watching it through my screen and then having had been broken up with and then still having to live through those moments with everybody else on screen, but then them not really knowing what happened and to now have to again relive our breakup in real time. And so I just, I've been processing a lot.

You know, it's just it's not a normal human experience to be going through these emotions at all different times and, and whatnot. And so yeah, it's been a lot of processing. But the biggest, the best thing that has come out of this is the internet and the community that I've like gained from it and everyone who has just been so positive and so empathetic. I think that's the biggest thing is like people can see how heartbroken I was and just to have to relive all those moments and like and heartbreak is a thing that everybody can relate to. So it just, it feels good to have this community behind me and I honestly couldn't be more grateful because I was I was honestly scared. Like I didn't know how people were going to react to everything. And especially when you're

going through a breakup alone, it can feel so lonely. But to have so many supporters, I think it really makes things, just like best case scenario, just to know that I have so many people behind me. It is so shocking in the best way possible when the internet rallies behind you and very deserving of it, you know, because the internet can be such a scary place that people can turn on you on a dime. And I was, you know, feeling scared is probably such a, that's a very valid feeling to feel going into all of this. Because, again, you really don't know how people are going to react. But my gosh, like, you could just, you could feel the heartbreak through the TV screen. You could just see it.

It was not like, that was so raw and so real. And I know that, like, everyone's just like, that was pure torture for you to sit through that finale. And I have heard different things. You know, like, you wanted to sit there and watch it with him. They, the hardest part for me was when you were like, do I have a choice? And I wanted to be like, yes. Like, I wanted, like, to me, it would have been a really powerful moment for you to be like, this is too hard for me.

I've been through enough. I'm going to walk off and plug my ears, but you can sit here and watch this. What was going through your head when they made you watch that? I mean, I will say this. Like, they're very conscientious of like my feelings. around that day and how anxious I was. So I was walked through every single part of what was going to happen that day, right? Like, they tried to make me feel as comfortable as possible, but I didn't know how emotional I was going to be. I have never cried in a room of that many people

before. I've never cried in a room of one person before, let alone that many people. So, like, I didn't know what my emotions were going to do and how that was all going to feel. But I did in that moment want to sit next to him and watch that when they told me that was going to happen. I said, that is great because I need him to rewatch those moments that we live together because throughout the whole breakup, I feel like he was kind of dismissing the fact that he had led me to believe all these like proclamations of love that he had made for me. I felt like he was dismissing them and I felt like he was saying like, I just don't feel this way anymore. But I'm like, why would you say things like that if you never met them in the first place? Like that to me

is something I can't wrap my head around. And I don't even know if he had been watching the show like that closely. So yeah, I did want to, I wanted him to watch that moment and to realize how badly he had hurt me because I don't know in what world somebody can get down on a knee and promise your life to somebody and then the next day not actually mean those things. Right. So yes. And it was, it was hard. I didn't want him to see me cry. I didn't want anyone else to see, but I was just, it was a very, very hard moment to relive. And it was also kind of like the moment in which I realized that the relationship had really ended because I, you know, had been holding on for hope for the past month because we'd had conversations back and forth of like, okay, like, let's just talk together and like see where this goes and like ended on a good term, whatever that meant. Like I just, I wanted that conversation off camera and I wanted to have that time with him.

And so I did hold on for a little bit of hope and in that moment sitting there next to him on stage and watching us promise our lives through each other and then realizing. that we weren't in that place anymore was was heartbreak at its finest yeah well it's like re-breaking the heart over and over again like it's that's so painful and i'm glad that at least we know that you knew that was happening because i was so everyone was so upset for you and hurting for you and with you and all those things so just for my understanding maybe i'm the i'm just lost but what was the timeline so you you proposed which was the thing that you, like when I interviewed at CMA Fest, were you two together? Yeah, we were together at CMA Fest. Okay. So, and so that was the thing that you were like, nothing like this

has ever happened on my season. It was that you proposed. Yes, yes. That was the big thing. Yeah. Okay. And now there, were there red flags leading up to all of this or, yeah, what, walk me through the timeline? Yeah. So we had officially, he had officially ended our engagement in, the beginning of August, I think. It was like August 1st, probably. But leading up to that breakup, yeah, there were definitely, I guess, red flags. I owed it all to like, we were long distance. We just came off of a reality TV show. Like, there's an adjustment period. And for me, I was being very gracious with that with the fact that like, you know, we have so much love for each other, but we just got to figure out how to make this work in the real world. It's like we have to keep dating each other.

We have to keep learning about each other. And making that effort can be hard sometimes. when he's never been in a long distance relationship before. So, yeah, I was making excuses for him. I was like, oh, he didn't call me for 18 hours. Like, and I don't know where he is. Like, it's okay. Like, he's probably just, I don't know. And like, and that happened a lot.

And so I, yeah, it was, it was tough. You know, there were so many scenarios going on in my head during that time. I was like, does he not love me anymore? Is he cheating on me? Is he doing this and that? like and I just each time I don't know like forgave it and was just like you know what we're long distance he doesn't know how to use a phone and I don't know you little angel what was he doing in those 18 hours that he you didn't hear from him what was his reasoning what did he explain anything to

you you know in the beginning he was just like my sleeping schedules just off I came off the show it's been like different I'm just so tired all the time and here's the thing when you get like when I got off of The Bachelor the first time, I was very antisocial. Like, I couldn't really re-assimilate into normal life. Like, so I got all of that. I was like, I get it. Like, I was so introverted. It's, it's a tough thing to re-adjust to.

So I was like, it's fine. He's going through an adjustment period. I just needed to, like, be there for him as best as I could. But then it was just like one thing after another. And it was, like, he wasn't putting an effort into our relationship. Like, we would, we never had a date night in the time that we were like long distance. It's like, yes, we had these happy couples, but, like, he never was like, oh, let's just get on the phone and, like, talk or let's get on the phone and do this together. It'd be fun. Like, it, we never did that in the two months after the show that we were dating.

Was he a complete different person as who you met on the show to who he was in real life? Yeah. And no, but yeah. Like, I mean, the person that I got, I thought I was getting on the show and had promised my life too was this lover boy who was so in love who was promising me the world. was going to move anywhere for me, was going to make anything work, and I was going to do the same for him. And then almost immediately after we got off of, we got engaged, it was like, wait, I actually, he was like, I never said that I wanted to move to California. Like, I actually don't. Like, and I was like, oh, okay, like, this is, I thought you had told me that and like meant that. And then it was suddenly like, no, I don't want to get married so quick. Like, let's, like, wait and I was like okay that's fine too but it was just like one thing after another his words that

he was saying to me seemed like things that he just wanted to say to please be in the moment and not actually follow through on he was like I'll fly to you all the time and like we don't have to like we don't have to like stay within the rules of the happy couple like if we can't see each other we'll see each other and there was a time period in which like it was a month after he had gotten engaged and we hadn't seen each other yet because of things that came up and I was like okay well they're not letting us to each other this weekend, like, just fly out and see me in Miami. Like, no, like the show hadn't aired yet. Like, nobody knows who you are. Like, we'll stay inside all weekend. And he was like, no, like, I don't want to do that. And he was like, I just booked

a trip to Mexico. Like, I'm not buying another flight. I'm like, it's 200 bucks. I can pay you $200. Yeah. Yeah. So it was just like the effort wasn't there anymore. He didn't want to see me. He didn't want to. Like, it's just, it's weird. And I can't wrap my head around it. And I don't know what happened and I don't I still don't really understand how someone's feelings and emotions and effort can change almost like overnight well I mean the terms get so tossed around of the gaslighting and the love bombing and the this and the that but he really I mean feels like a walking definition of those things like do you think he is misunderstood do you think he got cut up on the show or do you think he's actually just a scumbag I don't know and I think that's

the hardest thing is like I'm done kind of trying to figure out what's going on in his head and like who he is as a person like I have to focus on me but it has been really confusing and continuously confusing to try to understand if he actually meant everything in those moments on the show and like we still had really great moments too in our happy couple weekends and in like the phone calls like we still like you know I had so much love for him and stuff so it's it's hard to be like was everything a lie like i i don't know i can't figure that out i'm not in his head um but it was of the way in which he had acted after the breakup that was the most painful because i was like it feels like it didn't mean anything to you right yeah i think that's the biggest it was

almost like he's kicking you while you're down and on your glamour interview you mentioned you know hearing rumors about dev and deeming other girls did any girl come forward to you ever i heard the Ashley I knew someone that he was reaching out to like obviously he followed Maria from Bachelor Nation which that's also kicking you while you're down like are any has anyone come forward to you a couple um yes and there are still some things that I just don't know if happened or not and I'm just you know I don't have a card to play so I'm going to just wait and see like what actually happened and if it comes out it comes out what I do know is he was DMing like girls and I saw some of those messages and I think that's the most

hurtful part is like what was your game plan all along so I I don't know he was telling me one thing doing another he was like when he had broken up with me he was like you know what like I really want you know like I'm taking this time to work on me like I just I don't know why I couldn't deliver all these promises and like I want to be able to do that and like he made it seem like the door was open he's like i'm happy we're in good terms i'm happy this is like salvageable if in the future like whatever and i'm like i don't know and he's like i want you to know like i'm not gonna just be out here like hooking up with girls like whatever and then i find out he's t ming all these girls and it's just i don't even know who he is anymore so yeah i think that's i think that's

really hard for you because it's it's all just a mind you know like what was real what wasn't did those moments mean something to you because they did to me and then you're like so angry and so upset and hurt but you're also like I don't want to even try to understand him anymore but here you are having to do you're going to have to do so much press around it and interviews and talk about it how hard is it for you to move on while still needing to do press for the show yeah it's I mean like you know talking about it is processing it and trying to like you know just like work through it so but it is hard because I I don't know I'm not someone that like wants to

sit here and be like I hate him he's the word like I loved him like I genuinely loved him and wanted to spend my life with him so I'm just at the end of the day like you know his actions are his actions and he's going to have to take accountability for that on his part like I can't do that for him but yeah it is like it's just like for me I'm just kind of I'm ready to close that chapter because it's like he's saying one thing and then very clearly doing another and so at the end of the day like who he is to me is a liar like I I don't want to be with somebody like that I don't deserve somebody like that nobody deserves somebody like that and and he's going to go and do whatever he wants with his life and like I hope that he can learn from this and like be the best

version of himself that he can be but like I'm no longer interested in being a part of his narrative now I want to like give you snaps and claps and all the like things do you do you see the self growth that you've had do you feel empowered from all of this Like, even though it's so hard, do you feel proud and empowered that, you know, you, you are able to say, I don't want anything to do with that? Absolutely. I mean, listen, I am someone that always wants to see the best in people. And I continuously did, did so with him, even after we had broken up for a month.

Like, and you know what? I don't fault myself for doing that because I have such a big heart and that love for me was so real. And that's the kind of person I am. I will fight for somebody that I love and wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Like, I am so proud of myself in the way that I've handled this and the way that I know my true intentions and I know how genuine and sincere of a person I am, that I'm proud of it. And there's nothing, I don't have any regrets, you know.

The season played out the way it was supposed to. And I, yeah, made mistakes on the season, I'm sure, let things slide that I shouldn't have. But at the end of the day, the person that I thought I was marrying was somebody else, you know? And I know that in the future when I date and when I do find that person, like, I, I want all the same things that he was offering. I just need somebody who actually is going to fulfill those promises. Yeah, which is, you know, very reasonable and valid. And I didn't really love how he was not taking much ownership or whatever. And have you guys spoken since that night on the.

live finale. I'm going to be honest. Like I had reached out to him after and just like wanted to wish him the best and and, um, um, and then I started getting DMs from girls and all the stuff that made me upset. And I just like, I, I was done. So I, we haven't talked now. After that, I'm like, there's no, there's no excusing for that behavior. So I'm done. I completely agree with you. Uh, and now that you've had time or not, not that you're completely healed and it's processed, but you've had time to watch the season back and like think about if something went the other way and is there a guy that stood out to you that you wish you would have given a shot in hindsight like perhaps Jonathan or something? I don't know. Oh, the internet loves Jen and Jonathan.

I know. No, honestly, I don't think that they're, I would have went back and like chosen anybody different. Yeah, I just everything worked out the way it needed to. I have so much love and like gratitude for the guys on my season. There were so many great. guys like there were a few that were like okay but there were a lot of great guys um as well who i genuinely want to be friends with and and like can't wait to grab a beer with them all and like just hang out like and that's kind of person i'm like i just i we went through such an incredible journey together it's like i'm such a nostalgic person and so yes i probably will be grabbing a beer at jonathan jeremy like whoever it is like i i i want so badly to like keep those friendships but nothing

more than that yeah and you will that's i still to the state I'm friends with so many guys from my season. They're the best. And it's just, yeah. Oh, so many. Like, I'm friends with so many of them still to this day. Is there a reason that we didn't see why you did send Jonathan home? There was a lot.

There was a lot. You know, it just wasn't there. I don't think he'll mind me saying this. But, like, he just wasn't sure about doing long distance as well. And I was like, I live in Miami. Like, I'm not going to be moving. and he's not going to be moving so we were both just kind of like we didn't know you know like long distance wise if he wasn't his heart wasn't in it and like mine wasn't then it wasn't going to work

you know yeah so that was like a major factor as well that we like had talked about but other than that like no like we're we were we're we're on such good terms like we've we've spoken since the show um and and so yeah yeah that that makes sense yeah I mean some some relationships are just better off as friendships they don't have relationships don't have to be romantic you know what I mean? Absolutely. And like, I'm so excited to like, I'm so glad to know that you, you were friends with some of the guys on your show because I'm like, oh, how is this going to look? Are people going to think I'm weird? But I'm like, no, like, I just want to be their friends. Nobody will really ever understand a situation like that. Like all of us at home could be sitting there being like,

Devin gives us the ick. There's so many red flags. How does she not see it? And why did she pick him? But for you, it's a complete different bubble of a world that you're in. You're seeing something different. something different. We're watching an edited version of a show. Like there's so many things that you don't see that we do. And so many like just so many different scenarios that like nobody would ever know unless they're in your position. And even people like me who have been in your position, it's still a complete other season, you know, like different feelings, different humans, different reactions, different everything. So it's even even myself can't put myself in your shoes for some of it because, again, you're a different person than me. So I just want, I hope people

give you the benefit of the doubt for that because so many people, I asked, you know, listeners to write in and ask questions and people are like, why did she even pick him? And I'm like, well, you know, you're probably seeing a different version of him than we are. Yeah. I mean, listen, he was consistent with me. Like, and consistency is a big thing in my life that I haven't really had so to have someone so consistent all on the show and just like be so open with his love at the time felt so good and and and yeah i mean i also just it is it is what it is and whatever red flags i didn't see hey maybe next time i will but i i the person that i met on the show and loved on the show was was a lover boy and and yeah well speaking of next time you what year old

maybe be more aware of red flags. Like, do you feel discouraged to go out there and date again? Like, how are you feeling now as a single woman again thinking that you would like, you know, be engaged? Are you feeling a little excited? Are you feeling discouraged? How are you feeling going into the world as single gen again? I mean, it's not like I'll never date again.

You know, I'm not, um, it's not like I'm writing off all men in history and, and whatnot. But right now, like my heart is just like, not open. I'm just at a place where I am still processing this all. And like I up until a month ago, I was imagining a life with Devin, like kids with Devin. So it's just I need time to heal from all of that. I need time to kind of just move on from the relationship. And yeah, when the time comes, I don't know when that will be. I hope that my heart will be fully open to something else, but it's just not right now.

Yeah, that's so fair. I mean, it's your timeline. There's no rush on, you know, jumping into another relationship. or if they're like and it's okay if you do it's whatever your heart is right but it's what's cool is you know where you're at i know i know my heart's not open so you're working on the healing process of all of this to move forward and grow and and know your worth and then you'll find that you know you're not going to have to worry about going to be the bachelor again and not seeing things that we see like you'll be more aware and and you know knowing of who a person is

right away i think so many people were saying to me like i hope she goes on paradise And I was like, I hope she finds love in a library, like, that I want you to just be writing, like, reading a book and like some sweet little angel comes and swoops you off your feet in a, I don't know. I just wanted to be like an innocent setting. But like, I think it's too soon. I'll never forget. I was in the limo getting dumped on my way back to the hotel crying.

And one of the producers joked with me, we had a very joking relationship. And he goes, Paradise. And I was like, oh, my God. Absolutely not. What? And so I'm like, could you, now I'm being the producer, but like, would you ever even consider Paradise after all of this?

No, no. And it's so funny because when you talk about like being in a limo and getting dumped, I remember being in the Limo, Joey's season. And they're like, well, you never know, Paradise Bachelorette. I'm like, no, I was only here for Joey. Like, no way. I would ever like, I'm not ready. So it's so funny because I have that exact same experience.

But Paradise, no, no, no, no, no. I just don't think this is for me. I don't, I think I would, that's the thing. I would love to meet somebody in a library or after purchase store. I think I'm all set with online dating. You know, speaking of you were only there for Joey. Now you enjoy your on dancing with the stars together, which is so freaking exciting. And I swear I'll get to the exciting stuff.

I just have a couple more questions from listeners before we move along. But somebody said you had mentioned, well, I saw this too, after the final. Rose, that you sacrificed parts of yourself for Devin. Can you elaborate on what you mean by that? Totally. I mean, like we saw on the season, I had learned so much about putting myself first and not accepting less than the, like, not accepting just the bare minimum from a man, you know.

And so when right after we got engaged, I thought I was going to engage to someone who was giving me so much. And I was so in love with and like ready to like give all too. So after we had gotten off the show, it was like the weird like not texting me, not calling me, not putting an effort for date nights, not wanting to make me feel special anymore, not wanting to get to know me in my heart. Like he just stopped like dating me in a sense, you know, but was still going through all the motions of like being a boyfriend in some way, but not going above and beyond anymore. And so I let those things slide. I mean, I was just like, okay, it's fine. Like, he's going through a tough time.

We just got to be there for him as a partner. And things are going to get back to the place where we were when we were engaged. Like, I was just like, I'm waiting for that feeling to come back again, that effort to come back again. And it just was slipping and slipping and slipping. And then even after we had broken up, he had broken up with me, like I was letting things slide, trying to be so empathetic with him, making excuses for him. when I shouldn't have like I should have just taken it for what it what it is because at the end of the day if somebody doesn't want to be with me they don't want to be with me I shouldn't have

to beg I shouldn't have to sit here and convince you of my worth and for a second there I slept back until like convincing him that I was worth fighting for that I was worth being in a relationship for and and that severely hurt me too because I was like oh I just like I've grown so much as a person I can't believe I'm back in this position and I'm doing this myself but enough is enough and we're not doing that anymore so so yeah well that that's it's always something really it's like the last draw where it's like like there's so many things in my life where I'm like why does this keep happening to me oh it's because that's the part of myself I need to heal and that lesson will keep slapping you in the face and getting louder and louder and the

universe just keeps cranking up that volume until you're like ah ha ha and then you've had enough and And like to do this on such a public platform, but knowing that we are all behind you, we are all rooting for you. And it's okay if you slip. And it's okay if we go backwards. And it's okay if we make mistakes again and again and learn from them. It's okay. You are like a human being trying to navigate love and life in front of a lot of people.

And you're still so young. And it's just there's so there's so much. on your plate. And I hope you don't feel pressure or responsibility to be anybody but who you're being, even if that means you slip a couple times and go, wait a second, I'm catching myself in that slip and I deserve better. Yeah. No, thanks. I mean, it was hard watching myself through the season and let certain things slide and parts of me because we all have this perception of ourselves, right? And that perception is not necessarily always who we are. And in my head, I'm like, I'm like the baddest bitch in the world.

Like, I'm not letting anything slide. And I was like, wait, shit. I was letting things slide all season. So it is hard to come to terms with the truth of the matter sometimes, right? But that too is like, I'm so grateful that I was able to watch it back because now I'm like, okay, like these are habits like I need to go away. But like you said, like healing is such a process and it's a journey and it's not a linear journey.

Like you're going to go up and down all the time until you get to a point where you feel proud of. And it, that's not to say, but also, like, I am so proud of the journey that I've been on. I'm so proud of, like, the learning that I've done and the growth that I've done and I'm continuously doing so. And hopefully I will one day meet a man that won't make me question my worth. That won't make me question if I'm slipping back into old habits. And that's the goal and it all right. Look, all of these things that you're doing is going to get you there. You are learning so many life lessons. And, like, to do what you're doing is you're just, growing at a rapid speed from all of this. And that's, that's what it is. It's, it's,

you're going through big feelings and little feelings and it's, it's just a lot that you're going to get through and you'll, it'll all make sense. I was scrolling, uh, Instagram and watching people's stories and I saw that Maria was like, I got back from this and I, I see this happening on the internet and I'm going to have my side of the story and I'm not holding back. What does that mean. Have you talked to Maria? No, listen, I don't, I don't know what her story is. I don't know what happened. I'm not interested in, I personally don't think anything happened with Devin and Maria. I think he was being a bit of a jackass and like went and followed her for whatever reason and that's fine. I don't think anything happened and I never insinuated that and I never,

I never, I didn't want to have her be a part of this narrative because I know that there's not more to it. I just was like, that was a hurtful thing for him to do. Like, it was his, his little emma, whatever it was. Like, that was his action and his thing. Like, I don't think she did anything. I don't know. So, so I have no idea where that Instagram story came from and what she has to say. And, hey, I'll listen when she has to say something. So you haven't like talked to her personally? No, because I don't think that anything happened. So I wasn't, I wasn't like out here texting her being like, oh my God, did you do something with that? Like, no, I don't think that.

So, no. I was so confused because I jumped in late to the finale. And so I was like, why are we upset that he followed Maria forgetting you two were on a season together than this and this? And I was like, but it's nice to hear you be like, I think he's just being jackass. Like, I don't actually think anything. Yeah. No, he was just, he was following a bunch of girls.

But it was like the fact that he understood where I stood with Maria and he understood, you know, the whole season, there, there were things about Daisy and Maria. of being the Bachelorette and all these things. It's like you did that to be hurtful, like right after the day after we got like unengaged. Like it's, it was a bit that was hurtful. That was hurtful. Again, it's the kicking while you're down and it's disgusting behavior. I don't like that at all.

Somebody wanted to know why you didn't address the statements going around about the Marcus allegations. I'm admitting right now I have no idea what they're talking about. I'm admitting right now too. I don't know. I've seen people say things about these allegations. I have not read into anything. I have not looked into anything. I don't know anything except for who Marcus was to me on the show and the kind man that he

was. And yeah, I have no idea. Last question. Do you think Devin was positioning himself to be the next bachelor and hoping to appear heartbroken? Like, do you think he was, this was just a game to him? That's a question that I truthfully cannot answer. I don't, I don't know.

I go back and forth on different days of like he's. this amazing man that I love so much and he's got such a good heart and I know him. And then some days I wake up and I see the things that he de-empt girls and I'm like, never mind. I have no idea who you are. So I don't know. And it doesn't matter anymore. It doesn't matter. It's not, it's not me to figure out what's going on in his head. And you know what? The season's done. And in my opinion, he's done and you get to go move forward and do really exciting things. And you will be good people are. are rewarded with good things. And dancing with the stars is to this day, one of the best things

that's ever happened to me. I truly, it's the hardest thing I've ever done, but in a much different way than being the bachelorette. It's hard and more, you know, like physical, yes, emotional, more rewarding. And you will feel that every single Monday night. It's like you get out there and you just feel it is such a feel good show everybody's rooting for everyone and sasha is one of my favorite people of that whole franchise like he's who i call when i go to l.a to grab lunch with like he he really is a hilarious kind soul and i think uh you'll have so much fun with him he and he does such fun choreography oh my gosh off the bat we already have such great banter and i I already feel like I've known him for years and years.

So we are starting off on a really great. Like, I'm so excited to just, like, hang out with him and, like, and just, like, have this friendship and, and it's going to be really good. But I, okay, I'm so excited that you were also on it and that you had such a good experience. And I need tips. What do I do? Honestly, each week will be different. And I will be like your, like, call a friend.

Like, you can call me about anything with the show because there are times. where you will want to absolutely quit and throw in the towel and be like, I'm done. There are times that you're going to be like, I'm so competitive and I will do anything to stay here. There's times where you're going to be like, I think my feet are going to fall off my body. Like there's just so, there's times where you're going to want to throat chop Sasha just because you guys are spending so much time with each other. Like it's just all of these things happen. And I think my my main advice to people when they do this show is remember it's a show and remember that it is fun. Remember that it's fun because it's, even though in the moment you feel like

it goes by slow, it goes by so fast and the energy, just the energy of all the dancers and all the stars in one room and it's just electric. It's the best feeling in the world is getting out there on Mondays. Like all your hard work pays off and each week will be different. So like anytime you have a dance that you're struggling with, like I will freaking fly out there and I'll stay up all night with you like being the partner. I will help you in any way I can because I am rooting for you through all of this. Did you have dancing experience before you went on? Yeah, but not not ballroom. I did ballet growing up. Yeah, I did ballet and then like jazz and hip hop, but I'd never, I hadn't danced in, I don't know, like 10 years and I'd never done ballroom and ballroom.

Do you have any, were you like a cheerleader or dancer? God, no. I took one bar room dancing class in college because I've always wanted to learn how to ballroom dance. So it was like a one credit class, like whatever. It wasn't actually like a real class, but it was fun and I and I loved it. So I'm excited to learn. But like I'm also like I'm someone who I don't know. Like I get very shy from like being like very out there and like you know some of them really can be. Yeah. Like I just I don't I don't love to be on a stage necessarily and to like flaunt it all out there. So like that part of it, I'm like, I'm so like, I have such bad stage for it. I can't believe I just signed up for this. Okay. Well, then let me tell you this. You need to surrender to that. You need to, you need to do

whatever it takes to let go of it. You need to be sexy with Sasha. You need to be fun and flirty. The audience will love it. You'll feel better. You need to like step outside of your comfort zone and like free yourself of stage fright is normal and you'll get that every week but like just lean into this because even if your heart is closed flirt with sasha like he and you get to like dance with him and he's single and like why not just have fun with it it can just like that can be you know how actors they can go and just have complete chemistry with somebody on screen and off screen you're like oh we actually didn't even get along i'm not saying that's what it's going to be but i'm just have the chemistry, have the chemistry on and that doesn't mean to say that you need to be

romantic off camera, but like have that chemistry as dancers because that that does read to the audience. No, 100%. And I think that's the thing is like I can, when I'm like on a stage or like have to like perform in any type of way, like I'm usually really good at just like letting my guard down and just taking the moment for what it is. So I'm excited to see that. but that doesn't mean that I don't get nervous about it because I will be nervous. But I know it'll be so good. Yeah, I think I know it'll be so good. I am very excited to like step outside my comfort zone.

Like I feel like I've just been doing that for the past year and I'm continuously doing so, so excited. Yeah. And it's such a family atmosphere over there. It just, it feels so good. I love every single one of them so much. And, yeah, people, all of the listeners were like, ask her if she thinks Sasha's cute. he's adorable what do you mean he's like the best he's such a little sweet do you like german shepherds i love german shepherds he showed me his little guy i forget his name already but oh my gosh i haven't met him

in person yet so i'm excited to meet the grinch grinch i'm excited to meet grinch but my brother used to have a german shepherd so they've been my favorite for the longest time and they're just so then you are so in with him um okay and then what's the number we need to text to vote for you i don't know i have no idea i don't okay i haven't even done No promo shoots or anything yet. I've only probably signed the contract less than 24 hours ago. Like, we're like... Oh, my gosh.

This is like last minute, but happening. And I'm so excited. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Okay. So you just, you found out very recently. Okay. Well, that's exciting.

I was coming. I was running off the stage after I had watched the proposal with seven, crying, lashes were going everywhere in my dressing room. I'm like, holy. That was insane. And basically, um, A bunch of people came into my room and was like, gave me a big hug and was like, all right, you got to, you got to get your ID. You got to get a purse. You're not going back to the hotel. We got to get you on a flight in 45 minutes. Like, you cannot miss this flight because you're going on dancing in the stars. And we have to announce you tomorrow. Like it all happened in like it was a fever dream. Oh, yes. Oh, wow. So you went from like a rock bottom to like a high up high.

No, my emotions that night or like, is this even real? Can you? people even feel this low and this high at the same time? I was like, what the hell is going on? Like, it was, it's been such a whirlwind. I haven't even a process everything. So it's been crazy. Well, I'm so excited for you. And I'm, I'm sad we didn't get to be in person today, but I'm glad we got to chat. And I just wanted to like let you have the final word with anything, like, is there anything that people misunderstood? Is there anything that you want people to know? is there anything that you're like, I need to say this on a podcast. Oh my gosh.

No, I mean, I don't know. Like, I just, I want to remind everyone to just be kind. And like, I've been, I'm getting so much love and I'm so, so grateful and so excited to have such a beautiful community. But like, it just goes, not even in this situation, but in every situation online, I just think like this behavior of just cyberbullying is just not okay. You never know what someone's going through and their demons that they're dealing with. myth and like for me i always lead with love and empathy and i just i i would never go out there

and write something hateful to anybody no matter what they did to anybody um and and and that's it and that's it people are going to make mistakes at the end of it at the end of the day we are all human and and yeah that's just that's i'm glad that's your final message be kind i mean people can't even make a joke anymore without so much people just i think the whole world is collectively scared and hurting and i think the phone is an easy little place for them to have an outlet, but the contradiction is very confusing to me because they're like, oh, she's mean and she did this,

but then they'll turn and they'll be even meaner and nastier. And you're like, but you just said to not do that, but now you're doing it. The internet is very contradicting and confusing. But at the end of the day, you deserve all the love and support. And I love seeing everyone kind of rally behind you right now, and that'll get you some good votes for Dancing with the Stars.

I'm like, I don't even know how to vote. How does the vote at work? My mom was like, what do I do? I know. I was like, I don't know, mom. I'm like, yeah, I'll let you know when we figure it out together. Well, and we'll put it on, I'll put it on my Facebook group and my Instagram and all that of the voting because we're, this is, this is so exciting. It's so much fun.

I'm so excited for you. And yeah, just let me know if you need anything whether it's a day. Oh, we'll talk some more. I'll be texting you. Don't right. Please, please do. I'm here for you no matter what. And I just adore you.

Thank you. You're so sweet. I'm here for you. love you. You're so strong and just keep going. Thank you so much. I'm Caitlin Bristow. I'll see you next Tuesday. See your next Tuesday.