Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Keltie Knight | A-List Encounters, Kaitlyn's Paul Rudd Fail & Why Canadians Swear by Vicks!

Episode Date: March 6, 2025

#821. TV host and podcast queen Keltie Knight joins Kaitlyn for an unfiltered, laugh-out-loud convo full of hot takes and hilarious confessions. They dive into the struggle of relearning to love your mom, debate whether Kaitlyn should join Real Housewives of Nashville, and relive Keltie’s most unforgettable celebrity encounters—including the time she was certain Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt wanted to wife her up. Plus, Kaitlyn’s cringe-worthy run-in with hall pass Paul Rudd, their dream of getting booed at a stadium, and the very Canadian obsession with rubbing Vicks on literally everything. Feels like eavesdropping on two besties—so grab a glass of wine and tune in now! If you’re LOVING this podcast, please follow and leave a rating and review below! PLUS, FOLLOW OUR PODCAST INSTAGRAM HERE! Thank you to our Sponsors! Check out these deals! Covergirl: Superboost your lashes with NEW Lash Blast Supercloud Mascara from COVERGIRL! Clump-free, smudge-free, and lasts up to 24 hours—perfect for any look! Only from Easy, Breezy, Beautiful COVERGIRL.  Audible: Go to Audible.com/Chrissypodcast or wherever you get your podcasts and start listening today. Pique Life: If you want to feel hydrated, energized, and actually glow from within, now’s the time—get 20% off plus a FREE frother and glass beaker at Piquelife.com/VINE. Spade...See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow, and we have Kelsey Knight in the studio today to talk about yeast infections. That's towards the end, don't worry. I just like have people tune out, but they're like, I don't want to get there. I don't want to get there. We're so true crime. We talk about Lady World, which is the most exciting. thing coming up that everybody needs to come to. I will be hanging out with everybody all weekend. There's crafts. There's wine. There's singing on the beach. There's live podcast. There's

live music. It's going to be absolutely epic in Destin, Florida. And, oh, God, and I tell you about my Paul Rudd story, which I've thought about for about 15 years, and the moment came, and you'll hear about that. Cheers to you that KBs are together again. Oh, my gosh. I just love podcasting with you. It's, like, I look forward to it. Yeah, I was so excited. Thank you for having me on again. I mean, I like reoccurring guests. It's good chemistry, good banter. I think people like to hear it. And I know shit about you that no one else will bring up. Mel Robbins, I was like that whole time, by the way, that was a fantastic interview. I got to give you your props. Thank you. But the whole time when she was calling you out on your shit,

I was like, go get him, Mel. Like that was amazing. I felt like that was my mom. Yeah, but not even your mom, because your mom loves you too much to be that person. But it felt like what a mom would be. Like a hard mom. A hard mom. Like a tiger mom. Your mom's like a beach mom. Wait, what's that? Like a friend mom. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a...

She never was until I graduated. Wait, really? Yes. Was she hard growing up? Yes. Oh, yes. She got fun? She got fun when I was like in the 12th grade and then she was like, maybe I'll start drinking with you. I actually think that this is one of the learning lessons of being a woman is re-learning to love your mom.

Oh, yeah. Like, because we love our moms when we're kids. Like right now, so many of my friends, and I know your friends, too, have, like, young kids, and you're just, like, they're obsessed with their mom. They, like, want their mom. Like, dad can't do it. They want their mom. And then we go through a stage in our teens where we just hate our mom.

It's so sad. Like, and we're so mean. When I think back to the things. And I have actually tried to apologize to my mom. And I said, like, you know, I just want to tell you, I remember this thing. Like, I have this, like, true. traumatic Christmas morning where my dad had lost his job and they tried to make a beautiful Christmas for us. It was like probably in fourth or fifth grade and there were like not a lot of

presents under the tree and like it was like whatever. And then I remember specifically, I'm such a dick, I turned to my mom and I was like Matthew, my brother, he got way more than me. Like I was like such a little see you on next Tuesday, you know? But I was like, I was young. I didn't understand. I was like, wait, like it's Christmas. This is supposed to be insane. Not me. I would still be like that at this Christmas. And I tried to apologize to my mom. She's like, oh, Kelty, we don't even think about things like that. And she just gave me the impression, like, there were so many times that I screwed up and she loved me anyway. But anyway, but then getting into, like, being older and, like, re-falling in love with my mom and that friendship and wanting to, like, I literally

want to sponge her up, like a sponge, her knowledge, and just like her stories and all of it. I know because I feel like you, well, as we grow up and realize that being an adult is actually so hard, like, and that you realize that how much they did and how little that we do. Yes. I'm like, you did so much, and I'm just sitting here with a microphone. 100%. And I'm like, they must be looking at us. They must come to our houses and look at our closets.

And look at our facial reconstruction surgeries and be like, these girls got it so easy we worked so hard we're raising two kids in the snow in cold ass Alberta working our jobs trying to keep our love lives on track the dry ass skin of and they weren't allowed to talk about having like issues they had to have it all together nothing I'm sure they wanted facelifts they couldn't just go and get a blef you know you know but then they come to my house and I was like which room would you like to stay in you know what I mean I'm like Which bottle of wine would you like from my selection? If you don't let that swimsuit, just throw it out.

We'll order another one. It'll be here tonight. Like, I'm just such a dick. Oh, it's just such different times. But we also have so much compassion for them because we realize now that they didn't have it easy and they probably have so much childhood trauma. And then we're like, oh. Oh, bless you.

I want to give you a little hug. Well, it's interesting, Caitlin, because I always think like we thought our parents were just doing parenting things. Yeah. But if you actually think about it, they're living their life for the first time, too. So they're being parents for the first time. They're getting older for their first time. Like, we actually witnessed their life, too.

Like, it's like a deep hole of, like, 40ism. I was just watching. I'm trying to catch up on all the episodes of The Bachelor because I wasn't going to watch. And then I was like, oh, I'm interviewing Grant. Now I can't not watch an interview. Is Grant the Bachelor? Yes.

I haven't watched in so many since you. I switched from Bachelor to Housewives. Oh, really? And, like, yeah, because me and Jack on Lady Gang, we always watch Bachelor and Becca was a Housewives. And then I went over to the dark housewise side. Now I can't. I heard there's going to be a housewise of Toronto.

What? And it's going to be Jessica Mulroney. Oh. No, I don't know. You just said it. And I said, oh, that would make sense. Great. Megan Markle's ex-best friend.

I can't. Are they not friends anymore? I have no idea. I don't think so. But wait, who else in Toronto would be like athletes wives or something? Yeah, maybe Raptors wives, some wags. Actually, I was just thinking about this. Would you do it if there was a real houseways of Nashville?

I heard there, they are due. one because it would be you but how would I have a real housewife I've just been engaged twice? Yeah well that's it's it's it's loose like look at New York I don't know I've never watched an episode of housewives. There's like girls in New York right now which New York is not

great but like there's girls that have never been married they're just like hot girls in New York you know so you don't have to have been married and the engagement Okay Kristen Cavaleri you Carly Pierce Jesse James Decker Jesse James Decker Jesse James I mean that is all star

Yeah it would and if they through one person in there that I'm thinking about there'd be some drama right yeah you need a couple bad baddies yeah you need a couple of those but yeah i mean i just i've interviewed so many people who've been on that show and they say how mentally exhausting it is and how it doesn't feel authentic like it's very staged does it not i don't know it depends you talk to in what what um city i think because justin my co-host on e-news is like best friends with cow richards and it's like very real life for her Oh, it is? Yeah.

Like, it's very, you know, so I don't know. I guess it depends. Wait. I was laughing so hard watching your interview on Lady Gang with them telling you that you fell on purpose. Yeah. Which you didn't. Yes. Okay.

So at the Grammys, like a couple weeks ago. Would you've done 11 Grammys? I just went back on my bad outfits. Started from Sherry Hill. Now we're here, you know? But I find sometimes have Sherry Hill gowns really. I wore so many on The Bachelorette. I know, but sometimes they really smack.

I agree. There's a time. I'm at a place for Sherry Hill. I agree. And she won't give it to you. Especially like 10 years ago. Yeah. And it was like the only dress person who addressed me.

Yeah. So why do you keep falling? Okay. So I fell at the Grammys backstage. Derek was, my assistant was following me at the camera because I was like. Prince Derek? Prince Derek. I was like, Derek, we're here for content.

Don't stop filming me all day. Like we need to make a reel that looks like really chaotic and fun and whatever. So he takes, one thing about Prince Derek is he's going to take a note. Like he probably takes 400 pictures of me a day And he was on the ground mirror carpet And so I'm walking And like technically what Prince Derek should have been doing Is holding my hand and walking me because I'm an idiot

But what he was doing is what I told him to do Which was film me going everywhere Because I was like running up to people, meeting people, whatever And you know, Hollywood is dead The red carpets are dead So like this was the one good red carpet of the year So I was like we got like cash in Anyway so I'm walking along

And then I just ate shit I mean it was a bad fault I hate shit. And I'm wearing like a four-inch platform shoe. And then people are like, well, it's your fault because you wore the shoe. No, no, no. I want to take this back. It is the designer's fault because they make gowns and they only make them for six-foot-one models on the runway.

Yeah. And models in their showroom books or whatever. And then if you're a regular-sized person, you get the dress and they do not allow you to tailor it. You cannot. It's all beat it. You can't, like, you may be able to do it. do like a fake seam for this is like a tour gown one of one that I'm wearing the designer was from Dubai she did when Beyonce did that big Dubai show all the costumes and dresses were the same

designer like dresses the Ashland so I was very lucky to wear this designer but you can't like just cut the bottom of the dress and because it's beaded you can't hem it it would look so weird right so you just go the opposite way you grow and how do you grow you put on the biggest shoe you can find so I'm walking in the biggest shoe what people don't realize is that Grammy Red carpet is like on a essentially a parking lot. It's not on a smooth thing. So they've just basically put some carpet

on the little rocky road. On the rocky road and there's tons of casualties under there. You don't know what you're going to hit. So these little baby ankles, drink too much Diet Coke. The bones are like, bones are not boning. The bones are not boning. And I just bit it. But then

Derek ended up taking a screenshot from that and mixing it with the screenshot of me last year at the Golden Globes when I, lost my diamond on the red carpet and I was I was I didn't fall on the red carpet at the golden globes I was just down on the red carpet searching for the diamond so it was a mix of like losing the diamond and then falling at the grammy's wait did you ever find the diamond I did not find the diamond shit uninsured I did get a replacement yeah anyway so I'm an idiot and everyone on the lady gang podcast my co-hosts were like well we thought we did on purpose which a lot of people

on the internet did too. And I just, that fall was way too real. That ankle almost broke. Yeah, I saw it and it was like immediate. It wasn't like a, oops, it was like a down. Yes, it was a face plant. And then I was also disappointed, Caitlin. I don't know if you've ever tried the wet look hair.

Yes. Okay. I did it once. So I got roped into the wet look, which wasn't my first choice, but then, you know, when the gays are like, you're going to wet look, you're like, you trust the gays, right? Always. But the problem is the wet look is not a move. hair style. You think it's a wet look

so it's like you're getting out of the shower and it's going to move around. The wet look is like plastered in place. So then I fell and my wet look. Oh no. My wet look was never wetting again. Like it just like it crunched up in ways that it shouldn't have. Like it just anyway, if I had fallen on purpose I would have done it on the actual red carpet

Amy Schumer style so that people would see me not in the backstage area. But you still got a little cool content out of it. I got some cool content. I had a viral moment. I think like 6 million people have watched me eat shit. I don't understand why I'm not getting like an endorsement deal of an insurance company. Like, insure your body, insure your diamonds.

Like, where is farmers? Where's progressive? Like, I'm ready. Get podcast one on it. Yeah. Like, they could bring it in for your podcast. I need an umbrella policy for my own being. Okay, super boost your lashes with new lash blast super cloud mascara from the most reliable

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Okay, let me ask you something. How often do you take time for you? You know, like to grow, reflect, maybe even laugh, a giggle a little? Well, I've got your new go-to, and it's self-conscious with Chrissy Teigen on Audible. You know Chrissy, she's hilarious, she's unfiltered, and just like us, figuring it all out as she goes. And on this podcast, she dives deep into personal growth with some of the most brilliant minds out there. Like Mel Robbins, we love, Adam Grant, Gabby Bernstein. It's real. It's insightful. And honestly, it feels like you're hanging out with just a super wise bestie. Each

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Do you get nervous interviewing celebs anymore, or are you just hyped to do it? I do not get nervous. Amazing. Yeah. Like who is the one person you've interviewed where you're like, that's top tier? I mean, Brad Pitt was amazing because he stares in your eyes and you're like, oh, God. your next wife. Tom Cruz, same thing.

Like, Tom Cruise. Ew. No, Tom Cruise is weird, for sure. But like, when, you're in, there is, he's got big Tom Cruise energy. B, T.E. Big Tom energy. Like, and he's a short man. I know.

So you're like, there's just something about Tom. When he looks you in the eye, you're the only person in the world, I was convinced I was going to be his next wife when I did his movie premiere in Rome. I was like, there's 4,000 people here. And I was like, no, we're. meant to be together. I love our confidence. I truly thought Paul Rudd was in love with me the other day. I met him at the hotel. So I embarrassed the f*** out of myself meeting him. I was my worst self. I was the worst kind of fan. Did you know who you were? He definitely didn't act like it.

But I for sure told him I was the Bachelorette. No, you did it. You did that. Can you tell us more? It got worse. So step by step. Back story is Paul Rudd has been my celebrity crush, my pass my every i'm obsessed with them since clueless yeah consistently my hall pass it was him and ellen de generous i'm over her now okay i just think she would be a freak in the sheets okay i would like to experience that okay um not anymore but paul rudd and ellen were always my crushes and but consistently paul and i did podcasts around trying to meet him and trying to find him and like wanting to talk to him and I had all of my vinos like beyond lookout and to try whatever and then I got over it because I was like okay the Paul Rudd thing's not happening I'm sitting at my hotel before the Super Bowl I had had on no makeup in my sweats crushing breakfast and Paul Rudd walks right into where I was like sitting eating and he's just standing there and I was like holy I started like getting sick like I was like yeah oh god it's Paul Rudd, and I was like, this is, this is it.

This is meant to be. This is my moment. Yeah. And he started to walk out and I went, no, no. You got that I got from breakfast. I got it from breakfast. Eggs still in my mouth. And I walked over to him and I started word vomiting the most embarrassing shit. And it gave me a lot of compassion for when people come up to me and say dumb stuff. I'm like, I get it now. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was like, Paul. Mr. Rudd. No, it's it. I went Paul. And he was like, yeah. And you could tell he did not want to be bothered. And I went, I'm going to make this really quick. Because it's breakfast, yeah. It's very early. I was like, I'm going to make this really quick.

You're my hall pass. You said that to him. Swear to God. Caternity. I said, I said, I was like, not that this matters, but I was on The Bachelor. And then I was the Bachelorette. I almost said one dancing with the stars. And then I won't dancing with the stars.

You should have added that in. Building my resume for him. God, come on. And then he's like smiling and nodding. Like, get to the point. I know you on a photo. And I was like, it's just so. funny i was like i had a whole podcast around trying to find you i know about your little candy shop

yeah and he's like and i'm thinking he's gonna be like yeah and he's just and i go anyway so i'm a creep you're my whole pass do you hate photos can i take a photo he's like sure let's take one i was like okay take a photo with him and then when he walked away i like went back and sat down and we did the awkward thing we're like you look to each other again yes and then and then i looked away but he waved and then I looked back and I waved but then he looked away and I was like ah it was terrible he was thinking about it I think he's married well trouble in paradise because I made quite the weekly headline Caitlin Bristow home wrecker and Adam Sandler was with him in the same hotel but I didn't see Adam Sandler but I was like those are two of my favorite humans on the planet and I

blew it I was he wearing like a hoodie he would no he was just wearing a black top a red hat He took off his hat for the photo, which was interesting. And he looked tired, but still so hot. Oh, my God. I ruined it. I ruined it. I really did not play cool. Well, we closed the chapter on the Let's Find Paul Rudd.

Yeah, I manifested that for so long, and I just have to accept that that's how it went down. And sometimes it's better not to meet those people. I wish I didn't. Like, yes, right? I wish I didn't. Like, it's more fun to just never know them and know that they have bad breath or that they're kind of of mean or that they're like really into themselves like it's so rare that people in Hollywood are who they put themselves out to be I know I wanted him to be like you want this

ducal up in your badge like I was like expecting him to be like Paul Rudd from that movie and then I'm like damn it yeah he's just he was sweet and lovely and kind of and gracious and he took the photo but like yeah it was I just couldn't believe myself I was I was better than that Stars. They're just like us. Are they? Yeah. I think he was awkward. He was more awkward. Well, honestly, Caitlin. If you wanted Paul Run. Respect you. You should have told him about the mirror ball. Don't lead with I was on The Bachelor. Ten years ago. I would take that off the list even. Yeah, I know. I got to get over that. I would be like, I one day, bye, like, I know this is weird. I'm a celebrity. I know. I wanted to be like, we're like, you know, similar. Yeah, like we've both been on Broadway. I just like list I know you sing sometimes Me too Oh, I was so mortified

Yeah Damn Yeah Do you think he's like Ever gonna think about it again Yeah okay He's never thought about it again Well that was my fear

I wanted him to remember me forever And you know I actually before I came I was having a Last night I was having a like sort of dream About something really embarrassing I did that similar But it wasn't a celebrity

But I did a red carpet like a hundred years ago And it was my ex-boy Not my ex-boyfriend A guy I went on two dates with and made out, like, insanely on the corner street of New York City, like, one of the best kisses of my life, and I've never, like, not thought about it. But anyway, he became a movie director, and he directed a movie, and then I put myself on that movie carpet on purpose. Like, I don't even care about the movie. It was, like, whatever movie. But I knew he'd be there.

And then I dressed really ridiculous, and I wore a dress that had, like, a panty with a see-through, like, skirt. It was so sexy. And then one of the guys in the movie, and I was like, well, what do you think of the director? And I was like, has he ever mentioned me? we did go on two dates or whatever and then he was like wait did you wear that for this person like ensuing how desperate i was that i dressed up like this and it was true i did dress up like that anyway i just think sometimes it's better not to ever see those people oh god i mean there's so many celebrities at the super bowl and i i was there and it was so fun i loved the super bowl

you did love it i loved every second what was happening in the actual stadium with the taylor swift boo it was they were booing they booed anyone that was there for the chiefs. Anyone who was wearing red, they even booed a child. They booed Taylor Swift, but of course we all focus on the Taylor Swift. But they were booing anyone who was a chiefs fan. But weren't half the people chiefs fan? Wouldn't they be cheering? Yeah, because, and some of them were. So the booze on one side, because it was very, very divided. It was like separate?

Yes, it was like chiefs fan. I don't know. It was like sea of red on this side, see of greeny blue, whatever eagle's color is on this side. and the booze were so loud for any Chiefs fans. Because those Philly people are like crazy. They're loud. Philly people are loud. And so I, it's honestly on my bucket list, I would love to be booed in a stadium. Oh my God. Caitlin, I was sitting here thinking my goal is to be famous enough to be booed at the most watched public event on the planet by at least 10,000 people.

Like what a dream. It's better than dead silence. Imagine them showing your face and it being like Kelsey and everyone's just like, who? Yeah, I want to be booed. Dude, I keep going. We have season passes to the Kings, and I keep going and looking cute. And I'm like, I'm sure they're going to put me on the Jumotron and be like, Kelty Night, host of E News, Mirabal winner, was on The Bachelor, like, you know, whatever, you know, but they never do.

They never find me in the crowd. Like, I can't even get on the Jumbotron. They always find me in the crowd in an Oilers game. But they know you're there because they gave you the tickets for free. 100%. Yeah. I don't, I paid for my tickets because I can't, I don't get the free tickets. Well, then you've got to put it out on your Instagram and be like, I'm in section.

Right. Yeah, you're right. Put me on the teleprompter. I want to tell one of the kings something. But unfortunately, you're in L.A., so it's like Will Ferrell's there. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah, I know.

But did you watch the Super Bowl? I watched it the whole thing. Oh, my God. First of all, I'm a huge Kendrick Lamar fan, always have been. I think he's a lyrical genius. I know I'm supposed to be Team Drake because he's Canadian. But Kendrick Lamar is too much of a genius. He's a genius.

Well, those little pants. Those little pants. Those little pants. Those little pants. Those little flare pants. And when he was walking, he goes, hey, Drake. I just loved, like, I love the pettiness. Yeah.

I, listen, I'm going to get killed for saying this. Oh, God. I didn't think it was the best Super Bowl I've ever seen because it's very niche. Like, you got to be a fan. You got to be a fan. He did not give us a spectacular that someone who had never heard of Kendrick Lamar understood. I enjoyed it more once I got on the Internet, and the Internet started unpacking all the meanings behind.

behind this. I was like, oh, Serena Williams is there. That's cool. Like, I didn't even realize she was Drake's X, like, which I should know because I'm in entertainment news. But like, once the internet unpacked all the significance between the lowercase A and like all the, everything, I was like, oh, this was like very purposeful, very meaningful, and I actually think it's better. When I was actually just watching it blindly on the television, I was like, I could have had a bomber jacket change. Like, I felt, because we are idiot little white girls. No, for sure. And I know that. I knew it was. for me. I thought it was very well done, but I was like, my favorite part was when they did

this is a song, because I knew that song. You know what I mean? I knew every song, every lyric. Yeah, and as soon as I saw Samuel L. Jackson being Uncle Sam, I knew it was a bigger message. Yes. And so I was like, I can't wait to get home and unpack this. Yeah. And of course, leave it up to the internet to do the best job with every detail. Every detail. And I was like, yes, this was, and I think Kendrick even said it, like, this is bigger than the music. And I was like, this was such a message. Well, and also, it was like, it did exactly what it needed to do.

Maybe, and I'm saying, like, it wasn't for me. But, like, it did what it needed to do, which was, like, I, for the people that were not Kendrick fans before, we saw him, I mean, obviously, I know who he is, and I know what he's, his spectacular career. But, like, if you weren't a fan, you were like, oh, you kind of sat up, and then unpacking it, you were like, oh, oh, oh.

So really, maybe it was for everyone. I just am used to, like, when I covered Super Bowls. My Super Bowls were like, I did the Beyonce Bruno Mar's Super Bowl. I did the Katie Perry Super Bowl. I did very for me Super Bowl. So I was like, well, there was no one flying across the stadium or like Lady God coming down. Like there was none of like the pop girly theatrics. You're a dancer too. So you're like looking for the theater. Yeah. I'm like, so we're not having a costume change. Oh my God. Why are we not having? See, and I loved that. I was like, yes, because I just was, I think it was like, we don't want that. We want people to

unpack exactly what this is and an outfit change is just ruining that. And honestly, I'm like Rachel Zoe. I believe in a flare gene. I love the way it looks on me. I feel the tallest. I have a flare gene. I feel the skinniest. I feel the happiest with my butt when I'm in a tight and then flare gene with a platform on. I feel that. I feel that. You have a very, I like your style though. Really? Yeah, I do. I feel like you have a unique style. I feel like you know what works for you and you. Thank you. Yeah, you do one with it. No, you're good. We're trying. I actually always love seeing what you're wearing on red carpets. Thank you so much.

Who's the worst celebrity you've ever interviewed? People ask me this all the time. I'm not very original, Kelty. No, no, no. I mean, I can't answer that because I'm currently the host of E-News, and like it will get back to them. I will say that we wrote a book, Lady Gang wrote a book called Act Like a Lady, and I did write a chapter that is hidden deep in that book about my worst celebrity interview and

I named names. So if you want to know, it's like $9 on Amazon. on go by act like a lady and you can read it i know it's i just i don't want to say it out in the on the video were you there when conier and bianca were doing the carpet yes did you see that yeah i wasn't on the carpet at that time but like i had just left and i was talking to some of my photographer friends and i was like was there a merkin like was it a because it's really hard sorry i've gone deep dive i can't believe how close i've been to this woman's vagina like I deep dive zoomed to see, like, was it a murkin with a fake vagina?

And then it got into an entire conversation about, you know, listen, I believe in my heart that Kanye is incredible, has a mental illness. I believe that without a doubt. And so I do not think he's in his right mind. And based on people that I know that know him in real life, we can confirm. Yeah. So, I mean, I don't even want to waste any breath talking about him. But for Bianca, like, I like that the Grammys is where you do that kind of thing. But I also hate that it was like another thing that I had to feel bad about.

Like, I am used to seeing everyone's breasts and feeling like I don't measure up. And that there's a part of my husband that's probably like dreaming about a big juicy breast all the time. Because now we see boobs every day of our lives on the internet. There's a lot of boobs. But I've never seen a vagina slit out in public. And now I saw Bianca's perfect. Little paper cut. Paper cut of a vagina.

And I was like, oh, so now I need to feel bad about that? Like, it's one more thing to feel bad about because I'm not, that is not the vat. Like now we have a perfect vaj out there on Getty images that we all have to compare it. Maybe you should put your vagina out there on Getty images so that people feel less alone. Thank you. You know what? Tees and peas to the fluffy vagina community. Thank you.

You know what? Yeah, you're right. I actually did this as a fun thing when I was a dancer in a show in Las Vegas and we lined up all the girls in the show naked and we all compared vaginas it was very fun and it was like a great learning lesson because they really are like boobs they're all different

different sizes like whatever but I was like this girl has perfect boobs perfect little body perfect face and now this tiny little yeah but she's with Connie West. Yes I mean I I just I

actually what's interesting about it I was going to say something about the T-shirts and the Super Bowl. I'll tell you this. I love working at E-News because we have two amazing executive producers that make the decisions on what we're going to cover every night. And instead of when people do these horrible things for attention, they simply don't cover it. And I think there's people that are like, well, where's the outrage? I'm like, the outrage is actually our silence because what he wants is for all the news outlets and all the blooms. and all the blogs and everyone in the internet to talk about it.

And if we do not give him that attention that he needs and we don't bring attention to it, then there's no power. Okay, I don't know if it's just me, but I feel like my body's been straight up calling for help. Every part of it, my skin, not thriving, energy, not good. All over the place. I wake up exhausted, crash in the afternoon,

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Vine. That's P-I-Q-U-E-Life.com slash vine. So go grab it. Your skin, your energy, your whole body will thank you. Okay, I'm going to put you on to a little something. A hot tip, if you will, from one big wine guy to another. If you are going to drink wine in any amount, a glass of bottle, you need to be drinking one that's low sugar. High sugar content in wine is the main culprit for hangovers, and the high sugar wine is not good. Nobody's got time for that. So next time the mood strikes for a nice, crisp glass avino pick up a bottle of spade and sparrows all four varietals are low sugar made in california and of course female founded by yours truly you can locate your nearest bottle today by visiting spade and sparrows.com slash in store all four spade and sparrows varietals are honestly

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You did. Yes. So right now, okay, so Lady World Festival, September 26, Destin, Florida. Caitlin is one of our headliners. We're going to talk about some of the stuff. 2025. 2025. Tickets are on sale now at ladyworld.

com. But it's interesting because I was like, hey, like, we'll put an ad in our podcast for Swayne Sparrow's if you put an ad for Lady World in yours. And you were like, great. And I was like, I have one that I already made. And I'll just like shout out Caitlin in it, whatever. So we sent it over to it. ran and I got a message from one of your fans

are like, hey, I just want to let you know someone messed up because there is you, you are reading an ad in Caitlin's podcast. Like you're on Caitlin's podcast reading it. I was like, no, no, that's on purpose. We're promoting Caitlin and Spade and Sparrow's at Lady World. So now I'm going to have to make you do the ad.

That is funny because we talked about who should do the ad. And I'm like, I kind of like the idea of you doing it. And I'm like, oh, you screwed up. They're like, we don't want to hear this voice. Where's Caitlin's voice? We want Caitlin to hawk it. Anyway, so what could be expect to come to Lady World. Okay, this is the ultimate pop culture summer girly camp. As I've gotten older, as we've gotten older, we have less excuses to like go on girls trips. So this is like the summer

camp weekend of our dreams. Friday, Saturday, Sunday, daytime programming starts 9 a.m. So you can choose you know, yoga on the beach, Pilates on the beach, a pickleball tournament. We're having like crafting classes like beating and painting and I'm doing like a manifesting class. Elf Beauty is our sponsor. So they're doing like makeup tutorials, eyebrow tutorials, on site, there's shopping, there's a gifting suite, there's... You thought of it all. It's everything. And then in the afternoon, you can go to the beach and there's beach games and things like that, or you can just literally lay out and just tan and read your book, like whatever. And then you come back to the grounds, like three to five is going to be the celebrity meet and greet. So if you want to go have Caitlin sign a bottle of

spade and sparrows and take a picture with her, like that is going to be at a separate area. Five o'clock, the show starts. So we have podcasts and live shows for. from Lauren and Cam Hamilton from Love is Blind, Stacey Schroeder, Ariana Maddoch, Chicks in the Office, Caitlin Bristow, Lady Gang Podcast, and then music from Friday Night is the main, which is like the ultimate emo, hot, sexy men, rock band, and then Saturday night is called Pop 2K, and it's Chris Kirkpatrick from Ensign, B.B.B. Mac, O Town. LFO.O. I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch. Mark McGrath comes out to Sugar Ray and Ryan Cabrera. Oh, my God.

It's like nostalgic. Nostalgia, everything. And then on Saturday night, Caitlin, we announced this yesterday in our group chat. Caitlin is hosting a sip and sing. I'm actually so hyped for this part. Sip and sing with Spade and Sparrows on the beach. So we're going to make a giant bonfire on the beach. My dream.

Blankets, pillows, Spade and Sparrows for everybody. And like, we have to pick the songs because you need to learn the songs. We can make sheet music too. And like maybe we hand it out like when you're in grade school. Like lyric sheets or whatever. Or we just do songs that people know all the words, too. Well, they've got to be in my range. Okay, well, no, you need to pick them.

It's your sip and sing. So, you know, to be that, it'll be like the tailor to be. Why is that my dream? Like, I don't know what it is, but for years and years and years of my life, I've always wanted to sit around a bonfire and sing with a bunch of women. It's the kumbaya. Like, it is literally the dream. And then Sunday, same thing, like daytime activities.

And then you'll be doing your live podcast. and, you know, maybe some other things, but it's, it's $300 for the weekend. All the shows are included. We also have, like, 1,500 condos, which are all, like, five minutes from the site. So if you go to ladyworld.co, you can book your ticket for the festival, and then you can also book your accommodation. So it's all in one page. You get tons of discounts.

Yeah, we made it as affordable as possible. There is a payment plan, so you can, like, pay it. Because I don't want to say, oh, it's so cheap, $300 is a lot of money to people. Sure. But for what you're getting, the value of what you're getting. Like you're getting, I mean, that's like a one ticket to a show these days, you know? So you're getting all those daytime activities. Everything's free.

We're taking care of you. It's all super organized. So I'm really, really excited about it. We're about 60% sold out right now. So like if the Vinoes, you're the first person we're doing like promo with. So if the Vinoes want to come, like it's very important that they go get their ticket now. You have to come. And what's cool is we have this thing called the Lady World group chat.

We're every second Monday, every month leading up to Lady World, we have a giant Zoom. Yeah. And, like, people can plan, they can meet each other. So if it's, like, a solo lady, if, like, you're like, oh, I'm from Atlanta, I'm coming alone. You can find other Atlanta girls. It's like, and a secret Facebook group. Everyone's finding each other.

Sober girls are finding each other. Moms that are going to be lactating are finding each other. Like, it's like. I love that. I know. It's so powerful. And I want to thank you. You're the first person that said yes.

Oh, good, of course. And I just want to know right now on your podcast are, like, at the sip and sing or maybe on stage, like, do you think? Because people were yesterday when we announced it in our, in our group chat. people were like, if I'm being honest live. Yeah. Oh, I'll definitely be singing that one. I need to come up with a bop, though, because if I'm being honest, it's a little dark. Yeah.

It's a little heavy. A little heaps. It's a little sad, but I need to come up with a bop, which I am working on. Okay. I hope to have three songs. Okay, great. Yeah. So you could do like a song sing, and then we'll do ones that everybody knows.

Yeah. Like kumbaya. I'm obsessed. It actually is going to be so fun. I'm mad. I didn't think about it. But of course you did. It's genius.

It's absolutely genius. What did you say? Where did you say people can get tickets? Ladyworld.c.O. Okay. September 26, 27, 28th, 2025. So this September. And it's super easy.

If you've never been to Destin, Florida, you know Taylor Swift is like in Destin, Florida. I'm obsessed with Destin. It's beautiful. Let me tell you something. We went there for a site visit Noah Kahn played, which was like insane. I love him so much in those little pigtails.

We went for a site visit to see it before we, like, decided to do it. And I have spent my entire adult life saving up my airline points to fly to French Polynesia. I swear to God, I've been to, like, all over there, like, Tiki Hal, Moraya, all those places. Because I'm like, oh, those are the good beaches. When I got to Destin, Florida, on an economy ticket on Delta, connecting through Atlanta, for $167. and I saw this beach. Yeah, I know. It's unbelievable. I was so mad at myself.

I was like, this is the most beautiful beach in the world. I know. And the fact that it's in America because you get the most beautiful beach and then you get the fried food that America loves. Because when you go to French. It's five hours from my house. See? Yeah.

So Nashvilleians can just drive down. You could get a group together, get an SUV. Yeah. Because when you go to French Polynesia, you get the beach, but you get like a weird morning salad. You know what I mean? They have like that breakfast buffet. is like questionable craft cheese slices like the fact that we were on the beach and I was eating a

fried coconut shrimp and an iced tea I know I feel like people of Destin Florida are like damn it the secrets getting out because it is so good because Taylor's who's saying about it yeah I'm like what the hell why she has a place there what's out I have no idea why she loves it I know when I first heard that song I was like random but I like it something happened in Destin it's like Maddie Healy did something in Destin. Florida. Okay, well, obviously we always end with the confession. Yes. Did you bring your friend to share with the class?

Yes, okay. Prince Derek is here. Please slide over Prince Derek. Prince Derek. I love Prince Derek. He's just quiet here. So we were thinking, we know, I think you're in frame. So Prince Derek, we brought a good, we brought a confession by proxy. Okay. Because something happened to Prince Derek, which he should leave me and sue us. for on our tour and I'm going

to let him tell you now. So it's the last weekend of the Lady Gang tour and it's the most unhinged show we've had all year. We're in Phoenix, Arizona. Yeah. The girls, Becca Kelty and Jack, are on stage. Like, they're drunk as a skunk. They've laid their chairs down. They're sitting on the stage. I've never seen them like this before. Like, we've been touring since August.

Like, we've had eight shows before. Yeah. Okay. Becca has a little performance in the show and she has to go do a little quick change into a costume. Not a quick change and Becca was pretty wasted like the most I've ever seen her and she really had to pee

but she didn't have enough time with the quick change and like walking back to the stage to go use the bathroom across the hall so she was like I just have to pee right now I'm like, oh, okay. So I'm looking around in the dressing room. Okay. I find a plastic cup.

I'm like, here, pee in this, Becca Tobin. Yeah. Not the full name. And she, like, somehow manages to pee in the cup, and then it starts to, like, get full. Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God. And so hot, like, that hot cup of pee. Yes, and the cup was a clear plastic cup. Melting.

She hands me the cup as it's, like, overflowing. Like, some of the pee spills under the cement floor. I'm like, this is Becca's pee. I'm holding her pee. It's warm. Just kidding. But I had to dump it out really quickly into the trash. She'll give her the cup back.

To keep peeing. She used to keep peeing. Oh, load. And she has to get back on stage. Yeah, you're like, this is a great change. I did theater in high school. I'm like, you have to get back on stage. You're like, five, six, seven, eight.

Yes. One, two, three, four. Oh, no. So she pees in the cup. She finishes. I throw that second part away. She proceeds to go on to the stage to do her really great performance. She nails it.

She nails it. she nails it. Ladder is empty. I have to find some paper towel and wipe up the floor by hand, like to get the urine off of it. It was wild. Oh my God. And it was the second to last show of the Lady Gang tour last year.

Did she come out and finish and tell the story? She didn't tell the story that night, but she's telling the story to you. We saved this for you. This is an off-the-vine exclusive. Does Becca know this? No, we didn't tell us. She's about to find out. Okay, thank you.

That's resourceful. He's the best. Also, I have one thing, too. What? I have a yeast infection. Same! Shut up! I just put one of those inserts that Low Bosworth makes into my vagina on the way here.

Is it, like, leaking out right now? I don't know. I'm sitting. I just finished my antibiotics from sinus infection, and now I have a yeast infection. Oh, my God, we have a yeast-ease. Canadian girls slays together. I even, like, I doubled down on Activia yogurt. Not the activity of Jamie Lee Curtis.

Because I was like, it's a probiotic. I know. And my mom, anytime I'm sick, if I'm on antibiotics and I'm sick, my mom will beat a dead horse that I need to put VIX on my feet with socks. What is that? It's a Canadian thing. And it doesn't work. I think it does work.

Oh, okay. My mom was like, oh, my God, you need a hysterectomy. Here, let's rub Vix all over your body. I'm like, no, Mom, they need to remove my uterus. And she's like, just put some things. fix on and a soft water and a fluffy sock they're the same i want to can the vinos tell us is that normal or is it just from like la duke sherwood park alberta youtubeers put it in the comments we'll make a clip out of this thank you instagram thank you that is and my mom also is always like you're

going to get a yeast infection if you have antibiotics so i'm like shoveling activia down my throat and i still got one well i had sex and i didn't take i have a pill that i take after sex because I have a, the Kelty Night Flora is sensitive. And so, like, yeah, so it's still, I'm getting yeast infection just from having sex. It's been the same penis for over a decade, and it's still messing me up every time. So I usually take a, like, a pill that makes it you not get one. Oh. And then.

So now you just shoved one of those, and then you have to wait for a doll come out. Yeah, and. I'm just letting mine ride. You are. It's so itchy. But you know, the honey pot, that honeypot brand, they make a great vulva cream. I have it in my purse. Why do you think my heel right now?

is dug into my vagina. I'm itching. You're like a cat. Wait, that's so funny. I hate you. Why are we the same? Why are you copy me? I always copy you.

You do it better. You probably have the best yeast infection of all time. You have the champion yeast infection. You're a champ. Your yeast infection is going to go viral. You're going to get the trophy. And I'm just going to have a yeast infection. You're silently in the corner with four likes.

Everyone's like, oh, Kailen has a yeastie. And they're like, ew, Kelsey! I'm gross. Who? I'm obsessed. I could podcast with you all day. Bye. Let's move on.

I'm Caitlin Bristow. Your session is now ending. And if I'm being honest, I wouldn't mind a rating and review. Pluto TV has all the shows and movies you love, streaming for free. That means laughter is free with gut-busting comedies like the neighborhood, boomerang, and Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Bueller? Mystery is free with countless cases to crack from criminal minds, tracker, and Matlock. I'm a lawyer like the old TV show.

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It's just kind of crazy. Should I bring a whistle to wherever I go? Do you think that that would be the thing to break the ice? Whistle. Listen up. Every single one of us here is feeling some level of social anxiety. So let's just get on with it. Okay?

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